People who respond in the third mode usually have conditioned themselves so well that they no longer feel more than the slightest stirring of annoyance or anger and are out of touch with feelings in the extreme. Interestingly, rage as well as suppression keeps people out of touch with their real feelings. This doesn't have to be in analysis or with a psychiatrist. You can begin in a journal, with a trusted spiritual advisor, in a therapy or anger group, or with an individual therapist who isn't afraid of anger and who understands that he or she is simply your guide, that this is your journey, your agenda. Being able to live one day at a time is basic to a happy, satisfying life.
Historical anger keeps the past alive.
It is the gun powder that turns a quiet statement of about your anger into an noisy outburst. It's the gag keeping you silent, the mask hiding who you are, the cause of your fear of incurring someone's displeasure, or of making waves. To live in the present it's necessary to unplug from the power of historical anger, yours or someone else's. This could take a lifetime, but it is the only way one can call back his or her own power. It is the only way to take possession of your life and your spirit.