Salvage Dear Salvage, In Biblical times, some of Christ's chosen were so pure that they could reach orgasm by merely glancing at a woman's bare ankle. But for land's sake, try to imagine her covered in yards of calico to squelch out those lustful thoughts. I'm really into oral sex and feel I can't live without that sweet taste. However, there is a loophole where such actions are sanctioned. It took nearly an hour before that woman felt completely better.
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Please use one should you find yourself similarly available to heal a woman in need. At a recent lunch party given by management to celebrate improved productivity, my co-workers began taunting my faith after secretly imbibing liquorous spirits. Alan said that if God could make a rock that he couldn't move, then he would no longer be God because God can do anything. On the other hand if God couldn't make such a rock, then he is no longer God because God can do anything. Everyone laughed and I felt stupid because I couldn't answer this question.