There are individual differences in the need for privacy and alone time too. Some parents are so busy with their own lives that they aren't available for their adolescents at all. Parents are no longer people to have fun with, but rather they become important as an impartial sounding board for thinking through ideas. Parents have a role to play in setting limits and explaining limits to adolescents. As the child gets older, he or she is capable of making more decisions.
Effective discipline involves knowing when a child is capable of more independence.
A characteristic of a troubled relationship, in addition to the issues of availability and discipline that I mentioned above, is poor communication. It is critical for parents to establish honest, open, and frequent communication early with their children, before adolescence. Once things get off track, it is very hard to reestablish lines of communication. Some children are temperamentally difficult to communicate with. These are the children whose parents have difficulty when children are 3 and 4 years of age.