Eros is a desire for the thing beloved. Philos is a liking of the thing beloved. But agape love comes from the lover. It is more a commitment than a feeling. The thing beloved need have no merits at all.
Agape love is a decision of the lover.
But I am sure you have heard this much before. One final point. Remember when Jesus says what makes a man 'unclean'. Your arguments are too strong for me, and your eloquence sweeps me away. But I wonder.