That means that the partner must stay with a type of touch until she is ready to move on to a more intense type of touch. But stay with the gentle touch until she wants more. Non-demand touch is different from erotic message. It came from Masters and Johnson's work in the 70's. It is touching the partner for the pleasure of touch, without the erogenous zones.
Erotic message moves into the erotic zones after stimulating the whole body in very pleasing ways.
Its intent is to arouse. I have very specific instructions in my book . Sort of build up to it. Yes, but even before that, many women must understand the context of a culture in which their desire has not been given chance to develop. We have only, in the last 30 years, given women permission to explore their sexuality, let alone represented the feminine way of sex.