How you feel should not be considered. Feelings are changeable variables that have little relevance in decision-making on the job. A good leader thinks. Fine tune your communications skills - both output and input. But speaking and writing comprise only a small part of the total communication package.
Good leaders know when to be quiet and listen to the men and women they serve.
Listen to what people say and how they say it. Listen to what people don't say. Listen to people as they speak with one another. Read body language. In fact, don't stop with reading body language.