Even if someone has a good intent, if their action doesn't actually meet the other at their level of experience, the other person doesn't feel they are getting their need met. So, the other doesn't feel love, and in some ways it doesn't really matter what the intent is. A mother may feel like she is doing all the right things. She is home for the food and the homework, but when the child wants to talk about feelings that have to do with friends, mother doesn't want to hear it. People go to great schools and have all this chance to achieve so much, yet they can be from the most emotionally barren homes in the world.
Emotional deprivation runs rampant in the culture.
We value a materialistic lifestyle where we are giving people things in place of emotional time. We are living toxic success with more information overload and less time to enjoy and be alive. To be truly responsive to your children, ask them what they think of you. Ask your children what they need in order to feel loved. People need homeopathic doses of love, receiving little bits often and consistently over time.