This is an irrelevant question. They will answer with their version of what happened, almost always self-justifying. This elicits facts, not opinions. Misperceptions are clarified, not prolonged. Skilled trial layers, whether in civil or criminal cases, don't ask people on the stand what happened.
Juries decide or are told to decide on the relevance of factual information.
Work on active listening, not passive hearing. Conflicts escalate when partners try to talk more than listen and then only listen as a timeout for verbal rearming. Listening well is an act of caring. If you are a good listener, you have many friends. If you are a poor listener, you have many acquaintances.