In the days immediately following Murray's death, only one or two people called to offer condolences. No wake, no funeral or memorial service was held for the man who had few living friends. Dennis couldn't make things different, of course, but neither did he choose to respond with anger and bitterness. Instead, he gave his dad a gift. Although Dennis did not like many of his father's qualities, he loved him.
Love involves a decision.
That means Dennis did the specific kinds of things he would have done if he actually felt a great fondness for his father. That was part of the gift. During the last three years of his life, Murray lived alone in a one-room apartment. Dennis and I made it a point to visit him twice a month. Typically, the three of us went out to lunch at a Chinese restaurant.