Cocaine is a downer. You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug. You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee. You don't need a hammer to pound in nails. Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down.
Instant coffee takes too long.
People get dizzy just watching you. Sixty-three more, I'll have a cup. The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you. You're so wired, you pick up AM radio. People can test their batteries in your ears.