We are ALL victims in this trap. The only enemy is the church and its leaders. Sorry for the long rant. Allowing it to happen, to control their lives, that is the sad part. The sun will come up again tomorrow, just like it did today.
Life goes on.
Life is what happens while you make other plans. Our family has moved a fair amount as a result of job promotions involving relocations to other cities. When you move into a strange ward, you are quickly classified into one of the groups and there is little chance of ever being elevated to another group although downgrading is possible. Any outward indication or confession of a personal or family problem justifies immediate downgrading. Utah like grooming and accent 6.