How to be a Cultist How to be a Cultist Courtesy of the Discordians With so many people wanting to move into the exciting and lucrative position of Evil Cultist, this handy list of tips has been assembled. Pick one faith and stay with it. Dilettantism is the mark of the amateur. Avoid needless embarrassment. Practice the correct pronunciation of your god's name in the privacy of your room before chanting it in public.
Flash cards are often helpful.
Never invoke anything bigger than your head. Avoid all cabalistic jewelry over 10 pounds in weight, you're just asking for trouble. Citronella candles may not be used in rituals. I cannot stress this enough. Pastel-colored candles in the shape of cute animals are like beacons to the Dark Lords.