Whenever my life gives me something huge and great i.e., working for the YJPP Program, I thank God for allowing me to be so fortunate to have such great opportunities in my life. When I am way down I pray for strength and help to get through. However, when I am coasting I seem to pray as a habit and not for the blessings of daily living. So in reality I am just in my own head and not spiritual connected to God. Doing the right things for the right reasons and just going through the motions is not good enough to get by.
Life has to be intentional.
Not painfully intentional just spiritually intentional. A couple of weeks before my relapse, I had just been hired to work TGOF with Anthony. This was intentional to me because I need the extra money for my living expenses. I think God however wanted me to be sure it was intentional for my spiritually and for the spiritual growth of the kids I work with. At the time, I was focused on me, and it took a knock down from God for me to conclude that life is not just about me.