Go Beyond Observing the Amenities To forge a real relationship, it's necessary to move beyond strained politeness. It may also earn you an enemy. Pay attention to the subtext of your interactions with the difficult person, not just the words that are being spoken. Subtext refers to the meaning beneath the spoken word. Suppose someone gets tired of waiting for you to make a selection at the supermarket.
Enemies make for unstable situations, even if they're never spoken to harshly.
The idea is to demonstrate your willingness to put energy into this relationship for its own sake, and to mend any fences that need mending as a preliminary to that effort. There are things that are more important than holding a grudge. Building a new foundation for a relationship is one of them. If the person with whom you are dealing has had reason to believe you have become a permanent adversary, you may want to consider overcoming that obstacle by taking appropriate action. Your action should support the other person's cause in a dramatic and unexpected way that does not benefit you directly.