And the person who makes the mistake get to be involved in solving the problem. Now this may sound strange to the parent who is a great problem-solver and lectures on the way it should have been done the first time around. But think about it, even now our best thinking goes along with the greatest mistakes for which we've had to claim responsibility. The role of the parent is one of coaching for the child, not playing the game for him. A loving parent can cheer from the sidelines as the child takes that step toward maturity.
Independence thrives on a strong self-concept.
All too often when something goes wrong, there's a winner and a loser. The apparent winner, usually the powerful parent, often looks back with regret and wonders how it could happen that his child is upset or angry. When the person with the problem does the thinking about his part of it, when the parent can be the coach, when the child gets to play the game - they can both be on the winning team.