I was first diagnosed with clinical depression. When I received that diagnosis it seemed fitting to both myself and those around me. Depression hits you in different ways. It can be anything from extreme irritation to deep sadness. Sometimes you just want to start crying for no reason.
Insecurities build up.
The people around you don't seem to be able to relate to you, let alone care, and you end up feeling very alone. I think the fact that it came out of nowhere is why I felt the need to blame everyone and everything around me. I felt so isolated in my thoughts and feelings that I ended up pushing a lot of people away. Hospitalization wasn't a quick fix, especially since she was discharged too early, misdiagnosed, and given the wrong medication. There followed two years in which I was afraid we would lose Carmen to the streets.