Not only are they able to push through crowds upon command, and not only are their overcoats dashedly useful when spread over a puddle, but you might have made use of yours in this very situation. The youth of today, after all, are not the same innocent cherubs as we were, Sir William, during those old days at school. Instead of such gay, innocent pranks such as swaddling the frosh in petrol-soaked rags on Guy Fawke's Day right before the bonfire, today's delinquents are roaming the streets, looking for wealthy prey. Unlike those of us with a firm faith in God and Country, Sir William, they are creatures of impulse with no respect for the workings of Authority. Morality is of no consideration to them.
Fair play is an alien concept.
But if you had ordered your servant to run and fetch the lads, he could have taken then into a dark alley where you might have pistol-whipped the young boys both to within an inch of their lives. Mrs Grundy, Although it offended the delicate sensitivities of Queen Victoria to hear the word 'legs' spoken in her presence, even to the degree that she covered up the pillars supporting her pianos with especially tatted coverings, one must point out that this, madame, is the twentieth century. The words 'legs' is no longer considered offensive, in this day and age. Let one say it again. How trippingly it comes from the tongue, the word 'legs'.