When children are feeling loved and their needs are being met, they have no reason to resent the baby or to behave in ways that annoy and exhaust their parents. The challenge then is figuring out how to love and care for babies in ways that allow parents to continue to meet the needs of the other children. Wearing the baby in a sling is a great way to meet the needs of the baby and the older child. When the baby is in the sling, the baby's need for touch and movement is being met and you have both hands free to do more with the older child. Seeing the baby being carried may trigger a very young sibling's need to be carried, especially if they were not carried a lot as a baby.
Many children ask to be treated like a baby when the new baby comes.
Meeting those temporary needs helps them move forward much more quickly than telling them they are too big to have those needs. Whether the older child is two or ten there will be things you can do with that age child that you can't do with a baby. While that is good for their relationship with the other parent, the older child needs that one on one relationship time with mom, too. Most babies do fine spending an hour without mom and for the older child that hour with mom is very special time. Fostering close relationships with grandparents, aunts, uncles and good friends help parents meet the needs of their children.