It is those unsaid things which need to be discovered and completed. The review is most intense and most accurate in the time immediately following the death. It is the time when we are most focused on the person who died and our relationship with them. We will rarely have another opportunity to remember with such detail and intensity. Every griever is unique.
Every griever responds at their own pace.
It is essential never to compare one griever to another. Each and every griever has their own individual beliefs about dealing with their feelings of loss. Each griever is remembering their own individual relationship with the person who died. We have been talking about the review that follows the death of a loved one. Everything above also applies to divorce and to any and all significant emotional losses.