When a husband pushes for more frequent sex, a wife might wonder what's wrong with her femininity if she doesn't desire intercourse. The frequency question gets loaded. It's no longer just a matter of negotiating a satisfactory compromise because each partner's self-acceptance hangs in the balance. Finally, tensions creep in because there are so many symbolic messages included in the sex relationship. Marital sex can hardly avoid being an expression of emotions such as anger, guilt, fear, shame, jealousy, desire for control.
Anger can often affect a woman's responsivity more intensely than it does a man's.
In other words, a husband can pursue sexual intimacy even if the couple has recently been fighting. Guilt also gets in the way of frequency. For instance, guilt over premarital sex may create barriers to enjoyment later on. Any perceived sexual sin could cause a person to feel unworthy of sexual pleasure. Fortunately, confession and forgiveness bring cleansing from real guilt.