The arranged marriage has adjusted to modernization. Prospective grooms were once not even allowed to see the photograph of their prospective brides so as to preserve an unmarried woman's purity, her most valuable asset. By the 1930s, such as in my grandmother's marriage, the couple exchanged photographs, in order to decide if they liked each other. Today couples, depending on how liberal their parents are, have a coffee or meal on their own either at home, or in a restaurant, before deciding to commit. Middle-class women are allowed to reject suitors favored by their parents.
Engagements can now last six months.
Western concepts of love triumphing over tradition can be seen in popular Indian films. However, many Indian women in the diaspora are in flux. Freedom comes with a price. Some women, after having ended several long term relationships, find themselves in their late 30s alone, with one foot in either world and judged by both. It goes without saying that no marriage, not even an arranged one, is inured from basic incompatibility or abuse.