Your company welcome sign is attached with Velcro. Your CV is on a diskette in your pocket. You learn about your redundancy on the 6 o'clock news. Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose all your best jokes. Your supervisor doesn't have the ability to do your job.
Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more likely to get long-service awards.
At lunch time, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso. Insist to others that you like it that way.