You consider yourself a good Christian person, and indeed you probably are. You have come to accept a more private worship outside of the organized church. Let me agree with you first by saying that we are not saved by going to church. But now let me say that God's people gathered together, worshipping God and working in service is His plan. You need the close love of brothers and sisters.
Life is hard, and that much harder out away from a caring family.
So, I challenge you to view your distant relationship with church as temporary. Maybe some time out might be needed, but too much time out can become a growth inhibitor. The Word encourages us to come together, to give, to partake of the Lord's supper together etc. To my third friend, the one who is pretending. You are going through all the right church motions.