I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. Chastity is curable, if detected early. Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. Hell hath no fury like the lawyer of a woman scorned. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
Hard work pays off in the future.
Laziness pays off now. Eagles may soar, but weasels aren't sucked into jet engines. Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back. Beware of geeks bearing gifts. Half the people you know are below average.