And, as I watched in disbelief, he found a new job in rural North Carolina, bought a house for us, and proceeded to dismantle everything I had grown to know and love. Sharing nothing of his motives, seeking nothing in the way of compromise or agreement from me. When I saw that my protests could not reach him in fact, they spawned some of the most awful things he s ever said to me I began to make plans to remain in Chicago and send him on his way. I soon changed my mind, however, when confronted by the loss of my relationship and my fears about surviving on my own. Your dependent traits have long been your worse enemy.
Dependency needs are so strong, they create denial.
My stay in North Carolina lasted exactly four days during which time, I came to realize that being coerced into moving under such conditions was nothing I could accept, nor should. It was a little late for the light to come on, but I could kid myself no longer. The stench of how I had been mishandled in the decision to move clung to everything about North Carolina. So when my partner left for his first day at his new job, I wrote a short note and got the hell out of there. In leaving this way, I lost almost everything.