When we are trying to get our basic needs met through another person, we are marrying for selfish reasons. Sooner or later we begin to discover things about each other that we don t like. If I had know that you were like this, I would not have married you. Any marriage made for selfish reasons will eventually be a disappointment. But it is at the point of disappointment that we can shift our focus and allow marriage to become what God intended for it to be.
Husbands are even worse.
As such, marriage will rarely solve our problems and creates several of its own. It was never intended to substitute for God. We must be disappointed in marriage for it to have its intended purpose which is to turn our minds toward God, to drive us to grace, and to prepare us for heaven. God uses the friction of our differences to help us to grow. Because you are different from me, as I live with you, you will make me grow in ways I would not grow on my own.