Water pressure and temperature can be adjusted for personal preference. Bidets also afford this pleasure. Don't forget to add fantasy to your masturbatory experience. While most men get aroused from the sight of naked women, this is not usually true for ladies. Women appreciate seeing a good looking man, but a close up of his genitals will not generally turn her on.
Fantasy is the preferred form of erotic stimulation.
There is no wrong or right in fantasy. On average, it takes 20 minutes of stimulation for a woman to reach orgasm.