Moreover, sleeping difficulties shall not entitle Guests to raid the refrigerator, listen to heavy metal, or watch infomercials in the middle of the night. Sleepless Guests may, however, leave the house for a predawn dip, provided that they remove all sand particles and snapping turtles prior to reentry. Guests shall not abuse the furniture, place phone calls to Japan, or treat Hosts like servants. Guests shall be expected to perform minor chores such as dish drying and setting the table. However, Guests shall not have to vacuum unless they misbehave.
Guests acknowledge that they have no special dietary requirements.
I'm a vegetarian, so I'll just munch on some lettuce. Good lord, no. I gave it up last year. But you go ahead. It's your liver.