Knowing how to set him off means I have a choice, to fight or not. You too will have a choice in your relationship. Be aware when you choose to start a fight. When a disagreement becomes a bitter dispute over who's right and who's wrong, things are said that you can't take back. Harsh words spoken in anger are remembered long after, corroding the relationship.
Frequent battles embitter the fighters.
No matter who wins, both bear the scars. Always try to appreciate more than you criticize. Still, something your partner does may drive you up your tree and you just have to say something about it. Pick your timing, making sure he or she isn't already stressed out about something else, then say three nice things before you criticize. It also helps if the criticism takes the form of a suggested alternative.