It is worthwhile making it conscious . If a thing comes back to your mind an infinite number of times, it means you are fully interested in it. Your consciousness is of that level . Silent will achieves what was refused when requested. Absence of thought brings an understanding which defied thought .
Man seeks the greatest enjoyment in each act .
Seeking to enjoy Mother in each act is a yoga siddhi. As society advances, what only adventuring individuals can attempt becomes possible for other ordinary men . Society even fashions institutions for that purpose. First move away from your personality traits and then call. It is full, rich, energizing and enjoyable.