The reality of male violence against women is too disturbing for many people to believe. No woman wants the fear of rape to interfere with her life or that of her daughters and friends. Many women hold fiercely to the belief that we can and will have control. Some of the behaviours really do decrease the opportunity for assault. However, if a woman is raped while operating outside of the system, it becomes her fault.
Male responsibility is taken for granted, minimized or even excused.
It is more frightening and difficult, but in the long run more effective to recognize that all our systems are only half measures. Rape will only stop when men stop raping. If men didn't do it, women's responses would never be in question. Men too want to believe that women control whether or not they are raped, battered. It absolves them of responsibility for their own actions and those of other men.