This is the direst moment in Frank Hauser's direly straight-faced production. Hildegard Bechtler's designs subtly recreate the monochrome glamour of the inter-war era, and the lighting and costumes are impressive. These are the only redeeming elements, though, in a show that should appeal only to those who like to see new musicals fall flat on their fat, pompous faces, and possibly to American tourists who may savour the story's mixture of respectful royalism and individualist subversiveness. Always won't give Andrew Lloyd Webber and Cameron Mackintosh many sleepless nights. With Buckingham Palace situated so conveniently just around the corner, I trust the entire royal family will be taking a block booking for Always, the new musical about the romance between Edward VIII and Wallis Simpson.
History does so have a habit of repeating itself.
Possibly only the ignominy of being immortalised so tunelessly and tastelessly 60 years hence will make Charles and Camilla have second thoughts about any impending nuptials. Written by two unknowns, William May and Jason Sprague, Always is a Bernadette with royalty substituting for God, but being treated with the same reverence. Its other advantage is infinitely better frocks. It is peopled by picaresque Welsh miners tugging their forelocks and pledging their devotion to the erring monarch, winsome children, small dogs, obsequious flunkies and Sheila Ferguson of The Three Degrees, a singing group that once took Prince Charles's fancy. All it lacks is Edward Fox.