We have an idea that love is an accumulation of pleasant feelings. Loving an individual has been the excuse for possessing someone or controlling them or remaking them into what we want them to be. These are not ways of loving. Really, they are ways of making the use of another individual to meet our own needs. A love relationship is not to be confused with a bargain or the kind of relationship in which one operates on the basis of what we get in return for what we give.
Love is certainly one of the great mysteries of life.
We read about it, analyze it, define it, and still we aren't quite sure what it is. We want love, we give love and we get love-but we have trouble holding onto it. And his answer is that we must learn to love each other as God loves us. Real love is a way of living and relating that doesn't depend upon how good or bad another person makes us feel. Real love is the ability to see each other as God sees us.