I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges. Remember half the people you know are below average. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. I intend to live forever - so far so good. Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.