The system teaches you to work in a group and tells you that's the way it will be in the real world. When the stakes get higher than the system's comfort level, it turns its back on your and leaves you to think for yourself. It's not morbid or suicidal, that would be intentionally killing yourself. It is an end, but also a beginning. An end to the onslaught, but a beginning to a great relief.
Exhaustion sweeps the body and lids begin to fall heavy on tired eyes.
Muscles relax and the pain dulls. Eyes open to what was and they pain is gone. You are running and dancing with friends, voices echoing and resonating in your ears. What is becomes flush with what was and melts into a splendid oblivion. Opportunity abound and nothing stands in the way.