When you are feeling better and getting well, you will have the time to solve some of the problem areas in your life in a balanced way. Right now, though, it is important to move away from pain and toward pleasure. When you feel better, you will find that your perspective will be very different about many things in your life. Be aware, though, that it is very normal for some people to feel more fear as they start to feel better and as they start to enrich their lives, because they become more committed to life and don't want to die. Remember, just because we feel fear, it does not mean anything terrible is going to happen.
Fear is just an emotion.
Many people who are scared that they can't get well, do get well. Now let's look at the question of why you want to get well. Getting well is easier if you have something to get well for. It is very normal to have many different emotions in the journey of recovery. You have every right to look forward to getting well.