So you took it last. You feel as though you are making up your own mind pretty well. You feel neither coerced nor controlled. In fact, you appreciated the help you got. I set up the rules of the game.
Abusive discipleship is played approximately the same way.
Control over people is disguised as agreement with a discipler who, you are told, has your best interests at heart. Unlike the game, the choices are not trivial, but are more likely to be important whom to marry, what vocation to pursue, and where to live. The Apostle also admonishes us, Do not let anyone judge you by what you eat or drink, or with regard to a religious festival, a New Moon or a Sabbath day. The truth is because they feel they are closer to what an authentic Christian experience should be. I have heard many people compare the discipleship groups they were in to monastic orders or even the army.