Victims tell us and researchers confirm that there is a pattern of abuse that occurs in violent family relationships. Stage one is characterized by tension-building. Batterers may slam doors, break their victims prized possessions or make threats. The victims try to appease the batterers but the stress continues to build no matter what they do.
Clients often say they saw it coming .
They knew that a blowup was inevitable and they tried to do anything they could to avoid it. They changed their behavior and tiptoed around the abuser but to no avail. It is at this point that the couples need to separate. Too often, however, this does not happen and the second stage, the battering, occurs. The batterers may hit, kick, slap, burn, or otherwise physically abuse their victims.