Painting everyone with this brush is way too simplistic and misses the deeper meaning of sex for gay men. Some men are attracted to the sensations that are present when a condom isn t. The excitement for them is similar to the rush some men experience from sex in public places. Other men are drawn to the fact that this is an ultimate act of faith in their partner, and act of trust and intimacy that puts everything on the line. All sex that involves opening the heart is risky to some extent.
Intimacy requires vulnerability, and vulnerability carries with it the possibility of being hurt.
While we usually think of our emotions as most at risk when we think of intimacy, the sense of putting our physical selves in the line of fire as well may be a craving that isn t fully conscious. We want to be fully present during sex, and this may be one way to do it. Sadly, safer sex information often subtly trivializes gay sex. Little attention is paid to how important cum is to many men, for instance. If ejaculate is discussed at all, it s only in discussing ways to keep it out of your body.