Beer lasts longer than seven seconds. Beer never expects you to sleep in the wet spot. Beer never leaves the toilet seat up. Beer never needs a shave. Beer's life does not revolve around football.
Beer tastes good.
Beer won't care if you can't find the carburetor. Beer won't love its sports car more than you. Beer won't mind pantyhose drying in the bathroom. Beer won' t mind you not being wanting a beer. Men who love women who hate men who love women.