Ironically the unconscious goal is to repeat rather than remember the primary source of frustration, hurt, and abandonment. It is far better to be rejected again than to trust loving and being loved, and then feel like a fool when love is not returned. Usually the person is not conscious of the conflict. If there is awareness, it is often experienced only on an intellectual level. It is possible to understand conflicts over vulnerability by living out the experience of trust and distrust in the relationship with a therapist .
Enough time has to be given to allow for the reasons of distrust to unfold.
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