That is our entire obligation. We don t have to like those who have hurt us or let them back in our life, just love them and let them go in love. But we do need to set effective boundaries when we forgive. If I persist in holding onto my anger it ties me indefinitely to the person who made me angry. Anger that is unacknowledged and repressed creates a karmic relationship.
Karmic relationships are unpleasant, debilitating and repetitive.
When we fail to deal with a traumatic situation we will experience that situation over and over again. Remember the words of Lao Tzu, Because the sage confronts his difficulties he never experiences them. The failure to confront our anger and the practice of forgive and forget both lead to the same inevitable result. Negative situations continue, personal power is diminished and self-esteem is destroyed. To forgive and remember is not self-sacrificial like the practice of forgive and forget.