No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it. Dogs and cats instinctively know the exact moment their owners will wake up. Then they wake them 10 minutes sooner. Dog's have owners. Cat's have staff.
Dogs believe they are human.
Cats believe they are God. Dogs may shed, but cats shred. I had to get rid of my husband. The dog was allergic. If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket then giving Fido only two of them.