She also conducted a broader survey of 153 domestic workers interviewed at bus stops, English as a Second Language evening classes and parks where nannies congregate. She found that the relationship between worker and employer is complex and intense. In many cases, shame, guilt and awkwardness are felt on both sides. With no history of aristocracy, and given our history of master-servant relationships during slavery, some employers feel embarrassed, uncomfortable and even guilty for bringing workers into the house. Most Americans refuse to see it as employment.
Employers are equally reluctant to identify themselves as bosses.
Now I employ my own housecleaner. While I remain deeply ambivalent about the glaring inequalities exposed by this arrangement, I believe it's an occupation that merits recognition and basic improvements. Few aspire to the job or want their daughters to follow in their footsteps, but they remain proud of what their wages enable them to provide for their families. Most domestic workers had no training in watching children and keeping house when they left their countries, where they were students or secretaries or factory workers. Many would prefer that employers give them explicit directions.