On the other hand, some people instead focus on a feeling of steadiness and solidity, reflecting the firmness of a commitment or the solidity of a relationship, especially in adversity. The lightness in oneself and the steadiness of the other are by no means incompatible. These comments are used to good advantage in romance novels, but have their sources in ordinary experience. The connection with courtship seems quite strong, despite the many exceptions. The structure of the romantic episode seems best left simple and it is greatly enhanced by at least the appearance of spontaneity.
Circumstances can be very important.
A small gesture or sign of support in adverse circumstances can be far more valuable than great generosity in good circumstances. This introduces as well the symbolism of the hero and the fair maiden in fairy tales. Selfless help in adversity, revealing deep affection, is a theme common to most fairy tales, many movies, and many real-life romantic moments as well. The key feeling would seem to be one of a heightened self-worth seen as coming from the other person. Examples would include feeling especially attractive, important, strong, interesting, intelligent, and so on.