Co-worker frequently calls in sick or takes vacation days sporadically and one to three days at a time. Co-worker receives repeated phone calls at work from partner. Partner frequently shows up at your friend's or co-worker's office or place of work, often unannounced or unexpectedly. Co-worker or friend is reluctant to speak or to disagree in the presence of partner. Partner bullies or is abusive to suspected victim in public.
Abusers typically switch back and forth from angry, cruel actions to apologetic and tender behavior.
The longer the relationship goes on, the more fearful the victim will become. Typically the threats get worse and the victim becomes more isolated. In order to cope with such control, the victim denies her fear and minimizes the seriousness of the situation while hoping it will get better. She wears a mask of normalcy and tries not to draw attention to her problems. That is why it is often hard to know how to help.