Be sure to shred it and scatter the pieces. When the old lady is bent over picking up the scraps, you can chuckle at her backside. The main object here is to get underfoot. It's also fun to startle them. This will help their coordination skills.
DOGS Always act afraid of dogs in front of humans.
They feel so sorry they pick you up to comfort you. Put on a big show and hang on for life. If you have to throw up, get to a bed quickly. Barf in the middle of the quilt, preferably a good thick one that doesn't fit in the washer. It will give the human a chance to go to a Laundromat and spend more money.