I know you fools started doubting me when I thought about quitting football senior year to be in a production of Grease , but wieners aren't my thing. I've tried to be subtle about it, but I think I've got to just straight up tell him that it makes him look like a jackass. Yeah, my mom. You've known her since the fourth grade. I'll kick your ass.
College is for nerds and squares.
I'm glad I didn't get into Washington University because now I'm living in LA with a fly girlfriend, driving a respectable 1994 Maxima, and landing roles in commercials, sitcoms, and stage productions. Don't drive angry. This has been a horrible experience. Don't ever call me again.