There are three sets of processes that we need to go through in working through our grief. Acknowledge and understand the loss. Experience the pain and react to the separation. Move adaptively into the new life without forgetting the old. A. Recognize and accept the loss.
Denial is a powerful part of our make-up.
If we don't want to face grief's disagreeable experience, in order to avoid pain we may try to make grief disappear by denial. But the experience of grief just doesn't disappear as we try to refuse to admit to it. Accepting death is fundamental to the beginning of grief. That is why, whether we want to or not, we must see the person dead. That notion, at one time in my life, would have been the most horrible thought imaginable.