Since many courts look at which parent will provide better access to the other parent and which parent will help foster a close relationship between the other parent and the child, mothers need to use caution if they are asking for visitation that is not considered standard in the mother's area. The mother needs to reassure the court that she wants the father involved in the child's life, that she wants him to have a bond, and that she also values a bond between father and child. Mothers who do not want the father to be in the child's life have a difficult road ahead of them and often are more at risk of losing custody than any other group of mothers. In order to protect the breastfeeding relationship, mothers need to understand that a child's best interests require balancing the competing interests of breastfeeding and a bond with the father. Most mothers have trouble balancing these interests objectively because of their anger.
Counseling is an excellent resource for mothers.
It will give them a safe outlet for letting out their anger and developing communication skills so that they can work with the baby's father. Although education on the superiority of human milk is important in these cases, it is more important that the mother address the psychological issues involved. These should be proven legally by a psychiatrist, psychologist or other mental health professional. If the focus is on how beneficial breastfeeding is without dealing with the separation issues, there is a much greater chance that the court could decide that delivery of the mother's milk, by any means, will protect the breastfeeding relationship. It is generally not wise to raise breastfeeding as an issue past age one and certainly not past age two.