Because of convection, considerable heat energy is carried from the earth's surface to high altitude. Much of the energy of the flame is readily conducted through the paper to the water. The large amount of water relative to the paper absorbs the energy that would otherwise raise the temperature of the paper. You can hold your fingers quite close to the side of a candle flame without harm because the air between is a good insulator. But you will burn your fingers if you hold them above the flame because of the convection of hot gases in the flame.
Air is a poor conductor, whatever the temperature.
So holding your hand in hot air for a short time is not harmful because very little heat is conducted by the air to your hand. Wood is a poor conductor whatever the temperature, so you can safely grab a pan by its wooden handle for a short time. As with the hot air in the previous exercise, this is because very little heat will be conducted to your hand. Touching the iron part of the hand is another story, for then heat is readily conducted to your hand. The conductivity of wood is relatively low whatever the temperature-even in the stage of red hot coals.