You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer. You lick your coffeepot clean. The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse. Your so jittery that people use your hands to blend their margaritas. You can type sixty words per minute with your feet.
Cocaine is a downer.
You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee. You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in. You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers. Sixty-three more, I'll have a cup. The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.