Often one of the goals of the batterer is to belittle the woman's attempts to care for him and her children. Lesbian battering occurs when a woman uses violent and coercive behavior to control her partner or lover. She may use the additional threat of exposing the abused partner's lesbianism - which could cause her to lose her job, her home, her children, or the support of her family. It is a myth that certain groups of lesbians batter and others do not. Lesbian battering crosses the lines of class, race, and culture.
Battered lesbians are often afraid to speak out about the battering.
The fear of splitting the community keeps the battering a secret, and this allows the violence to continue. The fear of giving homophobic people fuel for their hatred of lesbians and gays keeps survivors of lesbian battering silent. The lesbian community as well as the battered women's movement needs to continue raising the issue of lesbian battering, validating the experiences of battered lesbians, and holding the batterers accountable. Battered husbands just don't come forward as often. The vast majority of battering occurs in heterosexual couples, with the man battering the woman.