It may be very difficult to do. To be truly present is to let the grieving person determine how she or he will express loss. There is the temptation to overload people who are grieving with advice or your beliefs to relieve the pain. Active listening is a willingness to hear what the grieving person is expressing even if it may not be what you feel. Everyone experiences losses but no one grieves the same.
Children vary according to age and ability to understand death.
Include them in the grieving process even though they may not participate in it. Offer care of routine needs through your designated church group or pastor. Providing meals, babysitting, watering the lawn, feeding pets, can relieve the grieving person from routine tasks and allow energy to be used for grieving or other tasks that need to be accomplished. Send a card to convey your sympathy. When you see a grieving person for the first time, convey your sympathy.