All rights reserved. When such problems occur, adults should do more than simply offer comfort and reassurance that things will get better soon. What is more useful is to suggest tactics and strategies to help the child cope with the immediate problem and with similar situations which may arise. Armed with firsthand knowledge that she isn't what she's being called, the child can address her adversaries with confidence or at least pay less attention to them.
Adults can also teach children to draw on their previous experiences as a source of reassurance.
If a child is highly anxious about another visit to the dentist, don't promise that it won't hurt or that it will be fun. The child's own memory of having survived the experience can become a source of courage to cope with the situation once more. Partial suggestions on how to deal with a situation help children manage when parents or other protectors are not there. By handling problem situations, children learn to cope with the world as it is rather than as ideally arranged for them by adults.