There is loss upon loss, an endless stripping. There is angst and angry refusal, abandonment and destitution. In the quietude of surrender, however, pain works its alchemy on a level other than that of the ego-self. Like a dark night of the spirit, chronic pain vitiates meaning. Yet, in embracing this void, one can find glimmers of a dark illumination.
Chronic pain shapes the undefinable soul-scape of an experiential negative theology.
The gravity of pain gives the hermit and the one who is called to rest in the still small voice of the Source , a rare and efficacious grace. In this heart-wrenching fragility all one can do is wait. In waiting, another level of attention is revealed as is another challenge to the ego-mind, for waiting is itself a kind of suffering. The attention required to wait in unknowing Simone Weil identified with waiting for God . Through the lens of pain, one also sees the great gift that is authentic friendship.