This is confused further by the fact that many BDSM players and lifestylers prefer to make things look as if it were extreme, sadistic, ritualized abuse. If you are not involved in BDSM, please take that as a given. Don't ask the submissive for permission. If they could give it to you, they wouldn't be collared. A collar is as or more significant as a wedding ring ought to be.
Collars are sacred.
This goes for dominants and submissives alike. It's every bit as rude to throw yourself at a Dom's feet as it is for it is to try and talk their sub into wearing your collar instead. Don't try to Top other Tops. If you wish to be respected, that is. Only the terminally insecure feel the need to compulsively dicksize.