I have enough money to last me the rest of my life unless I buy something. Jackie Mason I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve immortality through not dying. Too bad that all the people who know how to run this country are busy driving taxis and cutting hair. George Burns Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions.
Conservatives feel they deserve everything they've stolen.
Mort Sahl A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours. Milton Berle I don't want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their jobs. Sam Goldwyn Television is a medium because it is neither rare nor well done. With the collapse of vaudeville, new talent has no place to stink.