It is not biology that makes boys violent in America, for indeed they are. Rather, it is we as a society in the messages we give, the range of emotions we stifle within them and the myth of aggression we saddle them with. Most harmful, however, is our misunderstanding of boys' genuine emotional needs. We impose on boys what I call the male-gender straitjacket, that narrow band of what's acceptably masculine expressiveness in our society. We as a society unwittingly create the very aggression we wish to avoid.
Boys yearn to express their vulnerable feelings.
It is our responsibility, especially as the caring adults vouchsafed with protecting their safety, to reach out to them, before it is too late. We, as a society, reap what we have sown. For boys who are not allowed to cry tears or share their fears may someday cry bullets instead. He serves on the National Campaign Against Youth Violence, created by President Clinton after the Columbine killings. All rights reserved.