In themselves, the defenses are not all bad. They serve important psychological functions, and each of us relied on them as gay boys to survive in a hostile environment. But as we age, the defenses become more rigid and inflexible, outliving their original purpose. Psychoanalysts often say that defense mechanisms are like steel, thereby highlighting their impenetrable nature. This phenomenon can clearly be seen in the example of an alcoholic who is in severe denial about his addiction even as he is destroying himself.
Denial is but one of many powerful defenses the ego employs.
All of us also use projection to put disowned parts of ourselves onto others. It is this mechanism that has enabled so many straight people to demonize gay men and dump their Shadows onto us, but gay men also use projection frequently, often on each other. A related phenomenon is projective identification, when we unconsciously provoke others to act out our disowned feelings for us. Other common defenses include rationalization, intellectualization and displacement of a feeling toward one person onto another. In order to reclaim our own Shadow, we must each begin the difficult process of confronting and lowering these defenses.