I would like him to name our son as beneficiary of the plan, but he refuses. He would rather name our daughter. This sounds like a fairly easy question to answer. If you understand Texas property law, you know that money earned during a marriage is community property.
Community property is owned by each spouse.
The law is, however, very complex in this area. A recent case decided by the US Supreme Court, Boggs v. Boggs, makes this clear. In the Boggs case, the husband had a qualified retirement plan. His wife wrote a Will giving her half of the plan equally to their children. Shortly thereafter she died, and husband later remarried.