What old pains are mixed up with our current reactions. The old lessons from our parents may not apply now. Child's reaction Parent message Feeling like a failure. You messed up again. They don't want you around.
Children misunderstand or make up their own destructive messages.
These conclusions were probably not intended by the parent. Figure out what you can do differently. Refuse to let your own old Parent tapes control and upset your life. This whole process enables you to know your Parent ego state better, so you can instantly recognize its tapes. She decided to see her father for the dominant manipulator he was and to acknowledge her own abilities and goals, i.e. to shift control from her Child to her Adult.