Only one man who walks this earth can, and that man is Murray Foster. Plus he has bad teeth. Nobody is quite sure of why this phenomenon exists, but, suffice it to say, the polyester shirt industry isn't very pleased about the size of their customer base anymore. Reproduced below, as an aid to the reader, is a handy chart which is useful for separating the good shirts from the really good ones. Though I am oftentimes fumblingly adept at lock-picking, I neither know where Murray lives nor have the time, energy, or desire to enter his apartment, set up a clothing rack, and snap blurry photos of his wardrobe.
Bassists are invariably the most laid-back, coolest members of any band.
They tend to balance off the sheer raw energy of the drummers, the egocentric flashiness of the lead singers, the showmanship and flair of the guitarists, and whatever the hell it is that keyboardists exude. And he plays the bass.