Parents, and especially the mother, should be as open as possible with children. Keeping things from children does not help them. Normal family patterns should be maintained to the greatest extent possible to reassure children that the family is intact. Adolescent children pose special problems, even when they are fully informed about the disease, because they suffer more and often exhibit more behavioral problems during a parent's illness than younger or older children. Teens may act childishly, become moody, or do poorly in school.
Adolescent daughters have special problems.
They may be expected to take over the mother's role, causing her to repress her own needs. Additionally, adolescent daughters frequently fear that they too will develop breast cancer since they are now at increased risk. For that reason they need to be kept informed, and have an opportunity to talk with a with medical provider, if they wish to do so, to discuss risk factors, etc. Adolescent sons, surprisingly, have the most trouble dealing with breast cancer of anyone in the family. They are frequently given the least attention of any children.