There is always hope. Maybe you haven't found the right counselor that can truly break through the walls that your son has successfully built up over the years. If he won't bond with you, what makes you think that he will bond with a complete stranger. Counseling, like any other relationship, takes time to develop. Perhaps you could consider family counseling.
Adoption is a family issue.
He is far from abnormal. He is in pain, and when people are in pain, they behave abnormally. On the one hand, you say that you are doing all the things that a loving parent should do. Keep it up. Baseball games, conversations, and gifts are all well and good.