I see remnants of this attitude in my own life. We use people. We see people in terms of what they can do for us. We love them if they do what we want. We discard them if they don't.
Christian love desires the benefit of the other person.
It is concerned with building up the other . . . Christian love means we enjoy being together. That's why it is so delightful to come into a church and hear laughter. Worship should not be drudgery . When a group of friends get together there is talking, laughter and joy.