Time doesn't heal. She won't ever have a nanny again, though she has had a helper. Writing often starts at 10 at night, when the children are asleep. She rarely leaves them for a few hours, let alone a night or a week. And she copes by not thinking too far ahead.
Denial is essential.
Otherwise you'd go mad. Look at people in other countries, where all their children are dying of Aids. They still cope and look after their families and keep on working and living, and it's not because they're different, less sensitive, not at all. It's because they've developed this heightened ability to contain their pain. What a waste of having children.