When you are in a relationship where there is little or no respect, warmth or closeness, or you feel like you are taken for granted, abandoned, or shamed, it's only natural to distance and insulate yourself from the other. It's a reasonable response to an unreasonable situation. But, it can also be a primary killer of love in marriage. When counseling, I try to measure distancing on two distinct levels. Early signs of distancing include staying overly busy, tuning out your partner, ignoring important comments, and a general lack of sharing about every-day life.
Disaffection is a deathgrip.
And, more like quicksand. The more you struggle to pull yourself out of the hole and subsequently get rejected, the more easily discouraged and tired you become. That isn't to say there's no way out. It does mean, however, that battling with one another to somehow stop the marital decline only seems to make things worse. And, as the cycle loops back, criticism becomes more heated and more intensely personal.