Instead of holding a grudge against him I decided to address the issue by telling him how I felt. He appreciated my honesty and began taking time out for me. Another skill that helped Shona put her point forward was recalling specific instances where she had felt so, as opposed to generalising. You always do this to me, or You never care about how I feel. Refraining from using terms like always and never helps partners listen better.
Couples report that there are times when talking and listening is insufficient.
Conflicts may continue. Under these circumstances, problems need to be resolved by brainstorming about the possible solutions. Both partners need to be willing to accommodate. In case the conflict reaches a stage where resolutions are not being met, it helps to involve a third party. The presence of supportive family members helps to negotiate.