But I really shouldn't speak sharply against the stupendous dwellings here on campus. It goes against accepted Loyola policy of how we should view our living conditions. First of all, entirely abandon the concept that any manner of living outside the boundaries of campus could possibly allow for survival. You'll probably die of starvation, exposure, a cobra bite or the plague.
Death is around every corner.
Living off campus is far too risky. Thus, if you have any intention of either making it to or living beyond the drinking age, you must not at any time be more than a few feet from that magnanimous hub of civilization, the Danna Center. Trust me, you'll never make it on your own. Sodexho-Marriott is what will carry you through and keep you strong. Now that we've established that fact, allow me to explain the Comparative Swellness part.