Because of the very nature of the adversarial process, conflict is often exacerbated and communication breaks down. Judges attempt to rule in favor of what is in the best interests of the child, and when there are two competent parents, this is an obvious solution. Living in both households allows children to maintain a strong relationship with both parents. Research shows that half of all children in joint custody arrangements see both parents weekly, but only about 1 in 10 children of primary custody agreements see their non-custodial parent that often. When both parents are available, children enjoy the unique gifts of guidance, discipline, and love of each parent.
Additional advantages are the role models that fathers can nurture and mothers take charge.
Children benefit when parental relations are cooperative and there is no extended legal wrangling. When parents are reasonably satisfied with their custody plan, they are more likely to cooperate on a range of issues. Children are less likely to manipulate, and learn that conflicts can be resolved in a civil way. Research shows that couples who use divorce mediation rather than litigation decide on joint custody twice as often. This is turn generates resentment from mothers who feel they are left with the less glamorous jobs of setting limits and disciplining.