If someone loves me, I must have worth, significance. In the context of marriage, if I do not feel loved, the differences that surface are magnified. Love is unconditional. This question is a real question from a real situation. Such is based in hurt, helplessness, problems.
Anger held inside becomes hate.
Many couples have never learned unconditional love. We continue to be demanding and condemning, and thus destroy marriages. The choice to love, and even more the choice to love without conditions is usually made in the midst of a negative situation. We come face to face with the fact that the emotional high on which we began is not sufficient to sustain the relationship. This is a time for openness, for learning and growing.