Fashion retailers in that same shopping mall were less explicit but also provocative, hawking dresses to young girls that resembled lingerie and boxer shorts to boys designed to peek above their slacks. Experts like Wasserheit suggest starting to talk about love and sex with children when kids are very young, using words and images that young children understand. By early adolescence, kids deserve more serious discussions around questions they raise and questions they may want to raise but are afraid to. They need to be assured, for example, that falling in love is normal and so are erotic thoughts. Wanting to show affection toward someone they love is normal, and so is wanting to receive affection.
Adults can suggest appropriate ways to accomplish both, using straightforward language.
If adults acknowledge that sexuality can be pleasurable, kids are more likely to listen when those same adults say that sex can bring intense emotional pain as well. Kids also need to be reminded that the lusty, destructive relationships they see on TV and in the movies aren't normal. Such comments can make kids feel there's something wrong with them if they don't, or may push kids into relationships before they are ready. Adults, however, should not shy away from stating their expectations and values explicitly, according to the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy. They should talk in a way that invites discussion, even debate.