Or he may have threatened to kill her, the children and himself. Ironically, she will often leave because she realizes her children are being adversely affected by living in an abusive atmosphere. Most religions strongly discourage divorce and the breakup of the family. These ideals are admirable, but when abuse is involved, there is little Biblical support for remaining. But, a woman who has strong religious convictions can feel an enormous guilt if she leaves her marriage.
Abusers can appear to be very charming and likable to outsiders.
Sometimes, when a woman turns to her church for assistance, she is told she must stay in the marriage, because of her vows. Fortunately, these attitudes are beginning to change with a greater understanding of the horrible effects of abuse. She may feel she has nowhere to go. She may be embarrassed to ask strangers for help and reluctant to go to a shelter, if there is one available. He may feel her abuse is caused by her emotional personality, PMS, or other hormone fluctuations.