That gave them an imaginary feeling of security, an illusion of being more powerful. He can't help forming them. They can't afford to see them realistically. It would be too terrifying. So they idealize them.
Children always feel like they're at fault.
So, according to Firestone and Catlett, we grow up emotionally guarded, identifying with the powerful people who had control over us. On an unconscious level, we pick mates who remind us of our parents, so we can approximately re-create our families of origin. That proves comforting, since we have already constructed our defenses to deal with just such a family. They've learned to live that way. They don't like the anxiety that comes with change.