Your shame runs so deep that you will go into the closet yourself. A lot of effort will be expended in hiding your new found knowledge. The church that once was your succour and protector will be viewed as your inquisitor and accuser. You will feel like an alien when surrounded by your loved ones. It will help you enormously if you learn to admit that a large portion of your shame is covert pride.
Any relationship takes a tremendous amount of energy to develop and maintain.
Yet the thing most people do with alarming frequency is take each other for granted. A step that is essential before you move to action is questioning. You need to ask yourself some HARD questions and be as brutally honest as you can be. Because you are experiencing great emotional turmoil, these and many more questions will assault your consciousness. Therefore, it is to your advantage to be aware of this and use questioning constructively.