Most people enter marriage believing they would never have an affair. A great many of them have one or more affairs. Before you can decide what to do with the affair in your life you need to know what it means. They don't have a way to stand up to each other when there's a problem, so they can't resolve their difference and the marriage erodes. Intimacy Avoidance Affair Intimacy Avoiders are frightened of getting too close, so they keep the barriers high between them.
Conflict is one barrier, affairs are another.
Their emotional connection with each other is through frequent and intense conflict. Often, each spouse becomes involved in an affair. These couples are the mirror opposite of the Conflict Avoiders. Sexual Addiction Affair Sexual Addicts use sex over and over again to numb inner pain and emptiness, much like alcoholics use alcohol. Among married people, men are sexual addicts more often than women.