Today's date would be displayed here if Javascript worked on your device. Disengage cloaking device. I consider divorce as the 'actual', not the 'legal' death of a marriage commitment. As the authorities estimate when a victim died, and of what causes, we look back at a dead marriage commitment and estimate why and how it died.
Adoption is an example of the 'legal' and the 'real' being different.
The real parents, are not available to fulfill their God-ordained roles, and someone else takes on their roles. Both sets of parents may be loving, and have an important, positive effect on the child. That is a difficult question, but my point is not how or when, but it does happen. I do not propose to set down a list of 'should's', 'shouldn't's', don'ts, and do's to help someone blame someone for a divorce. Nor to figure out why a divorce happened.