In the end, Smith says, he explained to his children that the variations in people's lives, whether they be racial, religious, or anything else, don't make them better or worse, only different. So questions at this age sometimes become more probing. Gay friends have always been around at Sherri Alderman and Bill Arnold's home in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Their 12-year old son Sean doesn't regard them any differently than the straight friends who stop by. She didn't elaborate because Sean seemed satisfied.
Children are very content with simple answers.
Its the adults who get nervous and begin explaining all kinds of things that the kids didn't even ask about, overloading them with too much information that they really don't know how to use. What children at this age can use, says Jean Carpenter, a grade-school sex education teacher in Elkins Park, Pennsylvania, are matter of fact discussions delivered without emotion or preaching. Over the years, Carpenter says, she's been approached by many students who simply want to know what happens during homosexual sex. Their questions have always been very specific and direct, Carpenter adds. She answers them equally directly, dispassionately and factually.