Dear Toby, I hope you are feeling better than you did when you wrote the poem. I think it is great that you have come to a site like this one, about meaning in life, and the fact that you have shows you are still searching. I don't know how old you are, but please don't end your search. Whatever your circumstances right now, you can never imagine how things can turn around.
Death is never a solution.
There are so many people around, even through this website, that would want to listen to what you're going through. It's great that you are able to express how you're feeling. Please know that there are people, like myself, who have heard you, and would like to keep listening.