Rules are rules and policies are policies. One thing we've learned as advocates is that rules and policies do not always fit the best interests of our child and family. These are a few of the battles that we, as advocates, have fought and won. Talk to your spouse, a friend and other parents who have disabled children. Attend parent groups to hash through difficulties and get consultation.
Church is a good place for comfort and strength.
Don't take no for an answer. Know your rights. Choose your battles. Plus, you probably don't have the energy for all of them. Document events, times, dates and conversations in order to recall them easily.