The Book of Order, which is one of the two books that form the constitution of the Presbyterian Church, has a whole section on the Rules of Discipline. Presbyterians take seriously this passage in the life of our church. It should be exercised as a dispensation of mercy and not of wrath so that the great ends of the Church may be achieved, that all children of God may be presented faultless in the day of Christ. And so you see that the purpose of church discipline is to help people, not to hurt or wound them, to heal relationships, not to break them further apart. It is not always possible to achieve this end result, but that is always the goal, or it should be.
Confrontation is never easy.
Your stomach gets tied into knots, your blood pressure rises as your heart pounds in your chest, and it's hard not to take things personally. And yet confrontation and speaking the truth in love is the way of Christ. I love you too much to let you live like that, and I am going to bring people into your life who will hold you accountable in terms of your relationship with Me. That's what this passage is all about. If we really care about someone, we should be willing to confront them in humility and with gentleness, for that is the ultimate demonstration of how much we really care.