If he'd only grab me whenever he had the urge, he'd be extremely unlikely to hear a negative response. I'm customarily quite open and forward about our sexual activity. He's definitely sensing that something's wrong, though. But as I'm sure you're well aware, there are many other solutions to your situation instead of heading for an old lover or getting high blood pressure from holding your emotions in. You definitely had the right idea when you mentioned your openness in discussing sex with your hubby.
Communication is key.
But there are some tips to make this a productive discussion, rather than a red-faced, defensive dialogue. Your first words are incredibly important. Instead of beginning by talking about your dissatisfaction, start by telling your husband exactly what you enjoy about making love with him. Be complimentary, specific, and sincere. Now you can divulge your issues about frequency.