You no longer laugh at Preparation H commercials. The only reason you're awake at 4 a.m. is indigestion. The pharmacy gives you a volume discount. You are proud of your lawnmower. Your high school diploma is the color of buttermilk.
Digestion is a consideration when reading a menu.
Nobody ever tells you to slow down. You make everyone be quiet during weather bulletins. You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it. You have to get a fire permit to light your birthday candles. Your ears are hairier than your head.