Don t sweat the petty things and don t pet the sweaty things. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. To be intoxicated is to feel sophisticated, but not be able to say it. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity. Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.