When you go to a bar, you know you can always pick up another beer. No beer has EVER had a headache. After you have a beer, you can also cash in the bottle. If you pour a beer right, you will always get good head. You don't have to wash a beer before it tastes good.
Beer always comes in multiples of six.
Beer doesn't mind if you burrrppp back into the bottle. A beer never costs you more than two dollars, and it never leaves you thirsty. When this beer is gone, you just try another. Beer doesn't call you up in a month, at your next job. Beer doesn't worry about your roommate walking in.