When a wife asks about charges and her husband has been arrested for soliciting a prostitute, I can withhold the information in the hope that he has learned his lesson, sparing her pain and humiliation, and perhaps preserving a marriage. And worse, withholding the truth could put the wife at risk of contracting a sexually transmitted disease. Your consideration for your callers is admirable, but your job is to provide public information, not pre-emptive marriage counseling. You ought not pick and choose among crimes, covering up some and revealing others. I may believe that Pizarro learned his lesson and genuinely regrets murdering Atahualpa and conquering the Incas, but if the ghost of Mrs. Pizarro calls, I'm obliged to tell her what he's doing time for.
Different relationships entail different obligations.
In deciding whether to tell a friend about a straying spouse, your actions will be variably influenced by your intimate knowledge of the friend, the friend's desires, the circumstances of that particular marriage. But when responding to the public in your official capacity, you should treat all callers and crimes consistently. And so you must give that wife the information she is legally entitled to. This will not only enable her to protect her health, but also to make her own decisions about her marriage. I own a weekend house in rural Pennsylvania.