Men were fascinating and mysterious until they'd agree to take me home, and then as soon as we were finished, they lost their shine. It was as if some sort of tarnish had formed over their eyes, rendering them blind to just how unworthy I was of their affections. I'd hurry to get dressed, get out, run away from someone who could have been so stupid as to want me. The only ones I'd come back to were the ones who kicked me out as soon as we were done. The guys who would jump up and run to the bathroom, saying how nice it all was, but they had an early morning tomorrow.
Dinner plans tonight.
A boyfriend coming home in an hour. I finally woke up to the fact that I was putting myself at enormous risk with my behavior. We didn't sleep together for a long time after we first met. And after we broke up, I didn't want to go back to what I was doing beforehand. I had a discussion about sexual partners with people at one of my jobs.