Think for a moment about the vastness of the universe. Think about the level of intelligence that created it. I have a difficult time believing that this same divine intelligence could resemble a judgmental old man watching my genitals. It felt more godlike than the mean, miserable sex that was later forced upon me during a loveless marriage. I have a hard time believing God preferred me to endure the latter rather than enjoy the former.
Babies are never ashamed of themselves.
No baby ever measures its hips to find its self-worth . In Bitches and Abdicators , Toni Scalia wrote about accepting responsibility for our own choices within our love relationships in exchange for gains in needs met, respect given, and improvement in our lives. She recognizes the limits that have been placed on her and works to remove them, and she works for acceptance not agreement. She actively seeks her own fulfillment rather than burden her partner by living vicariously through him. She is pragmatic and, with her partner, seeks to understand the consequences that her behavior might have on their relationship and their love.