I was proclaiming God and self-sacrificial love, but what some heard was affirmation of a lifestyle and criticism of another. The shallow name their lifestyle preferences and look to Scripture for justification. Others start with Scripture and seek a lifestyle deemed worthy of God. Instead of submitting to God, we demand that others submit to our concept of what God wants. We chase our lifestyle issues as if something eternal hung in the balance, as if our pronouncements on lifestyle were critical to God's self-esteem and humankind's salvation.
Congregations enforce a subtle litmus test focused on lifestyle choices.
The divorced, say, need not apply. Gays will be fixed, not welcomed. Faith, we seem to say, is centered in us and our choices, rather than in God's revelation of himself. Salvation isn't a gift, like a mother's love, but a prize. We can redeem ourselves by making better lifestyle choices.