The confusion that we experience in the church over these terms means that we cannot blame our culture alone for the decay of families in our society. As the church seeks to reform society by re-knitting its heart fabric, we have a clear mission fairly and persuasively to rearticulate what biblical headship means for families. Our modern ears can barely stand these words. They sound so chauvinistic and sexist. What makes the words not merely tolerable but tender is the apostle's following explanation.
Biblical headship involves sacrificing one's self for the sake of another.
A biblically guided husband looks past his own rights to consider what is right for his spouse. Following Christ's example, such a husband refuses to abdicate the responsibilities of leadership for the family, but uses his biblical authority to arrange the family's resources and activities to serve the best interests of his wife and children. This description of headship repudiates modern perspectives that make headship a nasty synonym for self-seeking power plays. The use of the term to describe Christ's agonizing efforts for those He loves also speaks to those men who may use headship as an excuse for passivity in their marriages. Those husbands who will not expend the effort to do anything responsible in their homes may claim they are exercising the prerogatives of headship, but they are abandoning their biblical responsibilities.