The average cucmber stays hard for a week. The average cucumber is at least 6 inches long. A cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety. Cucumbers are easy to pick up.
Cucumbers can get away any weekend.
A cucumber will always respect you in the morning. A cucumber doesn't ask. Cucumbers don't care if you are a virgin. Cucumbers won't tell other cucumbers you're not a virgin anymore. With cucumbers you don't have to be a virgin more than once.