You mentioned your sister s death several times and your parents reaction to it. Often siblings feel guilty about going on in life when there has been a loss. Another deep grief of siblings is over the often-apparent breakdown in communication between mother and father when a child dies. I would say to siblings that foremost to remember is that it is not your fault . And, siblings have a right to grieve.
Children sometimes are afraid to express sadness over losses.
They don t share the same dreams as their parents. Children need to know that this is okay, too. Siblings will grieve in a totally different way than their parents. I suppose the message I would give to siblings is that you, too, will hurt from the loss, but not in the same way as your parents. Don t place blame on yourself because you do not grieve the same as your mom and dad.