It is a fact of life, like gravity. We can use death for ourselves or against ourselves. The choice is ours. The first step in seeing death as an ally is removing the childhood fears we have concerning death. This death stuff does not look very appealing.
Children then see the reaction adults have to death.
In the last analysis it is our conception of death which decides our answers to all the questions that life puts to us. The last straw for children concerns what happens to dead bodies. If a body is buried, the child thinks death must be eternal blackness, darkness, aloneness. If a body is cremated, the child thinks death is fire, flames, and pain. And most people don't.