Body and mind will try to protect you from being hurt again. However, this is not a bad thing. Loss changes people, providing them with opportunities for growth. One who has experienced a reversed adoption is not the same person he or she would have been, but is just as ready to parent. Memories will always be there, but this tendency is not unique to adoption reversals.
All parents compare child-arrival experiences.
This is instinctual, parental behavior. Grief for a lost child has nothing to do with loving the next one. After the initial shock, time is not a factor that trades off between grieving one and loving another. The processes will be forever intermixed. Becoming parents again brings special healing.