The more cooperative the parents are with one another the more emotionally healthy will be the child. Unfortunately, children are often the battle ground for mom and dad's war of unresolved issues towards one another. This creates deep feelings of grief for children. Consequently, children will fantasize about their parents getting back together, even after their parents have remarried and they have grown up. This hurt goes even deeper when the abandoning parent starts a new family with new children.
Children often feel that they are to blame for the breakup of their parents.
It is important that parents remind and reassure their children that they are not to blame. It is equally important that parents do not slander the other parent as soley responsible either. Even if the parent believes that the other parent is soley responsible, children do not need to hear a parents hurt or anger towards the other parent. The bottom line is that children need to love each of their parents and each parent needs to reassure the child that they still love them regardless of the divorce. If children continue to show emotional or behavioral problems, then it is important that parents find adequate resources for them.