The message you got as a child was very confused. It was not unconditional love. The definitions were not clear and the messages were mixed. Yes, no, I love you, go away. So you grew up with some confusion about yourself.
Adult children feel that they are different from other people.
Feeling different is something you have had with you since childhood and even if the circumstance does not warrant it, the feeling prevails. Other children have had the opportunity to be children. You did not. You were very much concerned with what was going on at home. You could never be completely comfortable playing with other children.