Relax expectations at school or at home, but remind the child that this relaxation is temporary. Anticipate the child's reaction, try to show confidence in the child's coping skills . Do not view this as a sign of your or parental failure. It is not unusual for children who have experienced a crisis to exhibit many reactions. This is not necessarily cause for alarm.
Children also tend to feel both anger and guilt when bad things happen.
Along with sadness and fear, children often feel they are somehow responsible for the tragic events, that their behaviour or thoughts caused the tragedy. They may be angry at a dead loved one and view the death as an act of abandonment. Older children may exhibit many of the same reactions as well as rebellion, refusal to do chores, loss of interest in peer social activities, anger, denial, etc. Understand and accept these reactions for what they are, a predictable backlash to unspeakable shock and grief. The above document can be prepared into a one page hand out sheet.