One team must triumph, and amazingly, this is something all males agree on, even those on the team destined to lose. Trying to save boys from the humiliation of losing is like trying to protect them from sweat, grime and stench. It is their God-given right. The only thing that needs protecting is the hearts of boys' mothers. I am often told by moms how much they hate this practice.
Boys compete verbally and physically and base some relationships on competition.
Competition, for boys, is a form of nurturing behavior. They have formed cultural and linguistic constructs in which to gain self-image through this strategy. It took me a while to accept that when boys and men yell at each other, call each other names, and try to beat each other at everything they do, they are actually engaging in a type of tribal dance. I couldn't hear, my heart ached. I was prepared to comfort my son on the drive home from practice and tell him it was OK if he wanted to quit because of the incident.