I couldn't resist. My apologies if any of these strike you as a little off-color. The dignity of our profession isn't going to be compromised by the idea that librarians might actually have sex. For example, myself, when I go to the ALA conference, I am only looking for sex and cheap reference materials, since I don't drink. However, I have it on good account from many hotel bar managers that NO ONE drinks like the librarians, when they're in town.
Bars have to stock up for weeks.