Then throw yourself into some work you believe in with all your heart, live for it, die for it, and you will find happines that you had thought could never be yours. Your character is what you really are while your reputation is merely what others think you are. If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep. Just watch what they do.
All life is a chance.
The man who goes furthest is generally the one who is willing to do and dare. The sure thing boat never gets far from shore. Keep so busy and work so hard that you forget about being afraid.