A loud voice may be interpreted as anger. The observation of a finger being shaken may be interpreted as hostility. The interpretation is unique to each person and is based on past experiences, expectations and personal values. Given the same information, no two people are likely to have the same interpretation. Step three is where our hearts come into play.
All humans have an emotional reaction to their interpretation .
Most people instinctively accept this interpretation as valid and instantly express their reaction. Typically, the reply, or at least the tone of the reply, is heavily influenced by the emotional reaction. This is where you could improve your skills by learning to do differently. Your emotional response would be to feel rejected and you will become silent to reduce your vulnerability to further rejection. Or your reaction may be hurt and you will feel an urge to hurt back.