Most seem to have a form of control, or expected behaviour which limits the growth of individuals within the environment. If we commit ourselves to one other person, or even to a group of people, we immediately give ourselves a set of limits on our behaviour. If we expect anything of anyone else, we also create a set of limits. If we adhere to these limits, we are stifling our own growth within the whole. In these circumstances, we then accept that any situation that is presented is co-created by our Self for us to face some form of fear still inherent within.
Any situation is recognised as the gift that it has always been.
Gossip is destructive because although secrets and judgements are expressed, it does not allow the people concerned to reveal their feelings in safe surroundings, and so be able to release the fears in love. We choose intimacy with one person because with one it is 'safe', but if we haven't learned to be honest with oneself even this becomes struggle. When we get the formula right with one partner, this can be naturally extended to any number of other people. Then we can turn our society into a caring one allowing the honesty and intimacy to come to the fore. But I have had 'one night stands' where physical intimacy was easy, yet to touch each other the next morning, let alone talk about the experience, was impossible.