Feelings of being used, discarded, and rejected replace feelings of being chosen, special, and valued. Their ability to trust is undermined. Everyone, not just the unfaithful spouse, is now suspect. Even God's goodness and protection are questioned. They Feel Powerless.
Anger grows out of a loss of control.
They feel as if their life is slipping through their fingers. There is often a loss of control over their thoughts and actions. Obsessive thoughts and dreams of their spouse with a lover invade their days and nights. Compulsively driving by the lover's apartment every 30 minutes to see if he or she is there isn't unusual. They lose hope that life could ever be good again.