And we must let go of them, so they can establish autonomy. What most young people seek is not separation from their parents but opportunities to renegotiate their relationship as time passes. Most teenagers describe their parents as supportive and caring, and they add that they know other adults they can talk to. Adolescents need connections to adults in order to refrain from dangerous habits, do well in school, and find their place in the world. These connections are primarily defined by love, respect, and high expectations.
Adolescents are dangerous.
Four out of five juveniles murdered are likely to have been killed by adults, including family members. The rise in juvenile arrests for violent crimes exactly parallels the increase in gun-related crime. Adolescents don't need regular health care. Generally, they're pretty healthy. Moreover, adolescents experience major distress in about the same proportion as adults do, that is, one in five.