Anger coming out of deep loss is different from occasional day to day flare-ups. It may be helpful to get away from the situation for awhile to calm down or find some constructive way to work the anger out of your system. Then return and take some positive step towards the problem. Talk about your feelings but avoid blaming others. Blaming fuels anger and may result in violent actions.
Anger is often a secondary emotion.
Find out what's behind it. It may be worry, fear or embarrassment. Then work through that feeling, too. Think of new ways to act in which you are in control of your anger. Talk to others who have learned to control their anger and may suggest some tactic to use.