So the social myth continues to be reinforced, referred to and described. A rift or clash develops between the child's concept of the real person, and the person portrayed in family lore. Confusion results and guilt develops because to support one side of this dilemma, the child must reject the other. Often this selection of sides changes rapidly, depending on which side the child is with at the time. The egos of the adults are satisfied but at the cost of the developing ego of the child.
Damaged adults produce damaged children.
Of course the reverse also happens. Often a child-abusing parent is protected by the spouse and family system, who do not want to believe that the abuse is occurring. The child subsequently feels victimized, devalued and unable to live up to the expectations of the environment because they are inherently, and secretly, flawed. These children may never develop healthy ego systems, but may instead live out lives with a sense of guilt related to not being what others see them as representing even as adults.