In an airplane, if oxygen is needed, parents are instructed to affix their own mask before helping their children. Time outs for parents are crucial even though they may seem nearly unattainable. It's near impossible to be a professional, a parent, and a lover-friend to your mate. You'd think it would get easier when children are older and parenting is less frenetic, but habits and patterns make it just as difficult to find time for your marriage. Four years away from a child-free home, I'm working harder to invest in the relationship that launched our family.
Actions speak louder than words.
One day I drove a child to sports practice because his parents told the coach they had to work and were too busy to drive. As we arrived at the child's home, the father finished mowing his lawn and came to the car to thank me for bringing his child home. The boy I'd driven was very quiet as he left my car. He didn't hang around to hear his father chat with me. He didn't greet his father.