Even the best actors will give themselves away. Children are tuned into adult's nonverbal signals. Trying to hide painful feelings or awkward emotions will only increase children's anxieties. Instead of hiding your emotions, learn about the stages of grief by reading books on the subject, attending support groups for families of loss, or working with a qualified family therapist. The better you care for yourself, the better you can care for your child.
Children respond to loss in different ways.
No way is the right way. Let children teach you how they think, feel, and respond to the loss. Walk along side the child in his or her personal journey. Notice the path and scenery as well as the direction you are headed. Don't wait till you are stepping over the edge.