The cooperative parent agrees to changes in their shared parenting arrangements. The victimized Parallel Parent lets the child know in ever so subtle ways how that other parent is trying to hurt them. I can spot them by their children's phrases. My mom gets me on Tuesdays, or my Dad only gets me on Fridays. Without even knowing they are doing it, Parallel Parents treat their poor child as if he were an object like a laptop computer to be shared for their own advantage.
Cooperative Parents believe that it is in the child's best interest to keep the child's life normal.
One teen lamented that he had too many activities to be going to Dad's so often. Instead of hearing the request for less time, the father told of how his terrific son had been the shoulder he cried on when his last relationship folded. He didn't get it that parenting is about the needs of the child, not the child meeting the parent's companionship needs. This is a process, and one that takes a considerable amount of work. Getting help or coaching on co-operative parenting situation is a smart move for parents.