Whenever Barry and I give a talk or workshop, we often begin with an appreciation exercise. We understand people may feel appreciation for one another. Still, we like to give them more opportunity to show it. For a relationship to work, there needs to be much more appreciation than criticism, perhaps even ten to one. If the balance is more on the side of criticism, the relationship will go steadily downhill, leading to resentment, anger and distance.
Appreciation is a fuel that continually feeds the flame of love.
True appreciation comes from seeing and acknowledging the inner being rather than the outer personality of the one we want to appreciate. We can easily become fixed on a person's seemingly harmful or unconscious actions and respond by shutting our heart. Yet, if we look a little deeper, behind the actions, we will see another child of God just like ourselves reflected in the light of our partner's eyes. We will see a beautiful soul sharing with us the same journey to the light. As we seek to uncover the divinity within ourselves and others, the quality of our relationships will rise to limitless heights.