Parents fear themselves. They have discovered from past experiences that their tempers are detrimental to the children. Parents waiting until anger provokes them to rebuke the children have seen only ill effects from rebuke and chastisement. They have come to accept the concept that rebuke and chastening is a negative event that must be avoided as long as possible. Parents are aware that their frustrated, and sometimes angry, correction does not work good in the temperament of their children.
Confrontation brings hostility on the part of the children as well as the parents.
Therefore, parents feel that the more they can tolerate and the longer they can ignore it, the better. Children are good psychologists. They quickly learn how to manipulate their parents into permissiveness. They learn that if they can make the act of discipline sufficiently unpleasant on parents, and give the appearance of it being even more unpleasant on them, then parents will back off. Knowing this, they see to it that discipline becomes painful for everyone.