Then we need to make decisions and choices. Ideally, we'd like to make decisions that honor our own needs and outer reality at the same time. In this balancing act, Focusing can be an important friend. Again, Focusing gives a way through the dilemma. You would start Focusing with a decision by bringing a gentle, non-judgemental awareness to all the aspects of yourself that are involved in the decision process.
Decisions always involve two or more aspects.
For example, in a decision about changing a job, there may be a part of you that wants to leave and a part of you that wants to stay. You probably also have various parts of you that are trying to help, and others that are criticizing you. ALL of these aspects of awareness have a contribution to make to the decision process. But first, they need to be acknowledged, so that you are not identified with any of them. Gently saying 'hello, I know you're there' to each part or aspect of the inner drama, can make a big difference in your perspective.