The sense that once more our child failed us. The sense that we've failed as parents. Watch for the different labels that each of your children holds. Too shy, too quiet, too busy, too weak, too strong, can't do this, not good at that, etc. Each of these labels is factual.
Children can be too shy, too weak, too stubborn, too loud, and so on.
But, that's not all they are, and when we fail to see beyond the characteristics they've acquired on the surface, we fail to recognize their true personality and thus not respect their individuality as a whole. That is a very alienating feeling for a child, a sense of not belonging to the people who are supposed to be the closest to you. Think of that the next time you approach your child's label, rather than your child, and I know you'd be amazed with your findings. Choose a time and a place. Prepare a large writing pad and write everyone's name on it.