100 below - Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Canadians pull down their ear flaps. 173 below - Ethyl alcohol freezes. Canadians get frustrated when they can't thaw their kegs. 297 below - Microbial life survives on dairy products.
Canadian cows complain of farmers with cold hands.
460 below - ALL atomic motion stops. The Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup. During my second month of nursing school, our professor gave us a pop quiz. Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times.