Her mother, uncertain about the best course to take, retreats back into her work or her novel, wondering if perhaps the little girl s bedtime is in fact too early. Charlotte returns to her TV show, feeling justified in protesting and determined to protest the next time her mother asks her to do something against her wishes. I believe there is an alternative. For starters, parents can establish a few simple rules, and then consistently enforce them. For instance, it is absolutely fair to expect children to go to bed at a designated hour, to treat others courteously, and to stay off busy streets when they ride their bicycles.
Anger is often the most natural reaction when a child behaves badly.
But aside from life-threatening emergencies, such as when a child runs into the street without looking, I believe parents should try to avoid scoldings or threats. Responding with a threat to withhold privileges or take away a favorite plaything may work in the short term, but a threat must be carried out or the child won t take it seriously the next time. Used too often, this tactic can lead to a test of wills between parent and child. It s wiser to pull the child aside immediately after he has done something unacceptable and gently but firmly tell him, That made me very unhappy, or Think how that made Linda feel. We are no longer accepting new reviews on this subject.