Your name amidst those of our other luminaries can help you achieve the status and recognition you've hitherto been denied by those rigid, close-minded, orthodox scientists with their obstinate obsession with factual evidence. Contributors holding advanced degrees from institutions with impressive- sounding names will receive preferential publishing priority. Titles of submissions should be a decaword or more in length and ideally will include several polysyllabic quasi-scientific technical terms. Contributors are expected to strenuously assert that they are thorough, rigorous, open-minded, and even skeptical. This is essential to maintain the proper air of academic detachment.
Critical rejoinders are welcome.
However, due to constraints in our operating budget and the ever-increasing demands for space in the JSE, we must unfortunately limit the length of such submissions to three lines.