Some relationships are kept together by guilt feelings which are often mistaken for love. I am a personal assistance user myself married to a non-disabled woman. I am in the privileged position that the government provides me with money to employ my personal assistants. I am not dependent on my wife in that respect. Those times when I am negligent in arranging personal assistants for myself and have to ask my wife to help me, I feel and function differently.
Dependency does influence a relationship negatively.
Sexuality is the result of the whole person's life situation. Without the prerequisites for self-esteem and personal independence there can be no sound sexuality. What I hope to have shown in this brief comment is that for many of us who have extensive disabilities our sexual liberation does not so much depend on sex counselling or mechanical sex aids but on the availability of tax-funded personal assistance services which empower us to take control over our own lives. Adolf D. Ratzka, Ph.