I threw my shovel down and had a fit because I'd lost that competition. He never just let me win, but he provided challenges. They frequently described the exhilaration and motivation they derived from winning. Take the risk of entering competitions. Enter some competitions in which you feel confident so you can experience the exhilaration of winning.
Awards are personal affirmations.
Also enter some competitions in which you feel less skilled. Not expecting to win helps you learn not to be too hard on yourself, and even small improvements can help you build confidence. Competition and collaboration are not opposites. Selecting the appropriate occasions for cooperation and competition helps you learn to function successfully in a competitive society. 2001 by Sylvia B. Rimm.