Family members don't have time to talk as they rush off to their respective activities or, when they do talk, they fail to truly listen to each other because they are preoccupied with the multitude of things they must accomplish. This lack of communication is ironic because effective family communication is a coping resource. It can help families cope with holiday stress. If your family is feeling overwhelmed and individuals and relationships seem tense, make a conscious effort to practice the twin communication skills of listening and expressing. Effective listening requires concentration, tolerance, rephrasing and sensitivity.
Concentration means focusing exclusively on what the speaker is saying.
Try your best not to think about the gift you need to buy for Aunt Sally and addressing the greeting cards when a family member is talking to you. Tolerance involves an openness and respect for what the other person is sharing and facilitates communication. It is doubtful that you are truly listening if you are being judgmental or defensive. Have an open mind and hear the other person out. Your teenager may have a good reason for wanting to have your holiday dinner Christmas Eve instead of Christmas day.