premise: This manifests itself in my not returning phone calls , not being available when others need me , not taking the time to demonstrate proper gratitude for kindness shown to me , and in others ways selfish , immature and irresponsible . There are some people in my life who would be shocked to hear me say these things about myself . I have been a volunteer minister for many years , and they have seen me devote most of my time to helping others . In some ways I have been very good at this and received much commendation for it . Why would certain people be surprised and shocked to hear you speak this way ?
hypothesis: They are not used to hearing me talk openly about myself