Gosh there s a LOT that is left out on the recurring things Jack and Fred Allen s feud that went on for years They hated each other over the air and in personal appearances but it was actually a well thought out process and written so Jack and Fred were actually very good friends All of the sound effects like the vault with the footsteps and clanking chains for the drawbridge and finally the sirens and horns You could just picture it all in your head Then the voice of Jack s long faithful guard Ed Halt Who goes there Friend or Foe Friend What s the password Foe Oh it s YOU Mr Benny And then a conversation would result in showing how many years Ed had been locked down in the vault The train station with Mel Blanc announcing Train leaving on track 5 for Anaheim Azusa and Cuc amonga Frank Nelson always jumping in there with his trademark Yesssssssss Or sarcastically retorting to questions asked by Jack Well who do you think I am with this red jacket on Santa Claus Frank Nelson was always a clerk of some kind and couldn t stand Jack and they bickered back and forth The stranger on the street saying Pssssst Hey Bud and going into this ridiculous routine Ronnie And Benita Coleman living next door and always dreading Jack getting involved in their personal life The play on words like the Cimmaron rolls No he s right Jack Look here at this label These Cimmaron rolls are not made like traditional cinnamon roles which are made of entirely different ingrediments The Oh Shut Up phrase being used all the time Phil Harris and his drunken band Don Wilson s weight Dennis Day s dumb Dora type character with his mother always getting involved trying to get Dennis a raise and arguing with Jack Polly the parrot When Polly had a cold Mary asked Polly want a cracker Polly want a Kleenex AHHH CHOO Then the next week Polly still had a cold and Mary asked Polly want a cracker Polly wanna die Jack s violin teacher Professor LeBlanc who tortured himself given Jack lessons and making him play scales to which he would sing along Play it softly play it tender Where can I go to surrender The I Can t Stand Jack Benny Because contest The operators Gertrude Gearshift and Mable Flapsaddle They threw insults back and forth at each other After waiting on Gertrude to dial a number he would yell at her and she would say something like Okay Okay I m ringing it You know Rome wasn t built in a day Well you oughta know You helped build it Well Thank you Julius Caesar The laundry business Jack had on the side Little old ladies loved him When I think of him ironing my petticoats with his own little hands I get GOOSE PIMPLES I sent him a Valentine s card in my laundry bundle It went Dear Jack when I think of you this Valentine s Day I can throw my vitamin pills away I bet he didn t answer it He certainly did He said Your lovely poem made me shake and shiver And starting May first we pick up and deliver