c2p-cmd/Good-Quotes-Authors huggingface dataset:
Love is possible only if two persons communicate with each other from the center of their existence, hence if each one of them experiences himself from the center of his existence.Only in this "central experience" is human reality, only here is aliveness, only here is the basis for love. Love, experienced thus, is a constant challenge; it is not a resting place, but a moving, growing, working together; even whether there is harmony or conflict, joy or sadness, is secondary to the fundamental fact that two people experience themselves from the essence of their existence, that they are one with each other by being one with themselves, rather than by fleeing from themselves. There is only one proof for the presence of love: the depth of the relationship, and the aliveness and strength in each person concerned; this is the fruit by which love is recognized.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
Bowlby uses the notion of faulty internal working models to describe different patterns of neurotic attachment. He sees the basic problem of 'anxious attachment" as that of maintaining attachment with a care-giver who is unpredictable or rejecting. Here the internal working model will be based not on accurate representation of the self and others, but on coping, in which the care-giver must be accommodated to. The two basic strategies here are those of avoidance or adherence, which lead to avoidant or ambivalent attachment.
— Jeremy Holmes, John Bowlby and Attachment Theory
She didn't realize she was in a prison until she collided with the bars.
— Joyce Rachelle
Psychology at best tells us how things are, not how they are supposed to be!
— Zal
A securely attached child will store an internal working model of a responsive, loving, reliable care-giver, and of a self that is worthy of love and attention and will bring these assumptions to bear on all other relationships. Conversely, an insecurely attached child may view the world as a dangerous place in which other people are to be treated with great caution, and see himself as ineffective and unworthy of love. These assumptions are relatively stable and enduring: those built up in the early years of life are particularly persistent and unlikely to be modified by subsequent experience.
— Jeremy Holmes, John Bowlby and Attachment Theory
Attachment exerted an invisible but powerful pull on the child, just as heavenly bodies are connected by gravitational forces. But unlike gravity, attachment makes its presence known by a negative inverse square law: the further the attached person is from their secure base, the greater the pull of attachment. The 'elastic band' which constitutes the attachment bond is slack and imperceptible in the presence of a secure base. If the secure base becomes unreliable or the limits of exploration are reached, the bond tugs at the heartstrings.
— Jeremy Holmes, John Bowlby and Attachment Theory
To feel attached is to feel safe and secure. By contrast, an insecurely attached person may have a mixture of feelings towards their attachment figure: intense love and dependency, fear of rejection, irritability and vigilance. One may theorise that their lack of security has aroused a simultaneous wish to be close and the angry determination to punish their attachment figure for the minutest sign of abandonment. It is though the insecurely attached person is saying to themselves: 'cling as hard as you can to people - they are likely to abandon you; hang on to them and hurt them if they show signs of going away, then they may be less likely to do so'. This particular pattern of insecure attachment is known as 'ambivalent insecurity'.
— Jeremy Holmes, John Bowlby and Attachment Theory
While we teach knowledge, we are losing that teaching which is the most important one for human development: the teaching which can only be given by the simple presence of a mature, loving person.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
I long for the day I no longer long for him.
— Franki Fiori, Down to the Bone
...knowing often felt preferable to not knowing. It provided the illusion of control.
— Jordan Castillo Price, GhosTV
Despite what you might think, NORMAL people do NOT cause problems, misfortunes, conflicts, distress or accidents. And when they do, they CAN apologize and recognize their negative influence. A person that causes these things and can’t assume any responsibility for them is, apart from showing the cognitive and moral level of a child, deserving nothing more than abandonment, because she is dangerous at all levels and can hurt, or even kill, someone BY ACCIDENT, including herself and whoever is with her. A person like this DOES NOT deserve any TRUST for ANYTHING, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING.
— Robin Sacredfire
As I regard physics and psychology as complementary types of examination, I am certain that there is an equally valid way that must lead the psychologist 'from behind' (namely, through investigating the archetypes) into the world of physics. As an example of background physics, I shall discuss a motif that occurs regularly in my dreams - namely, fine structure, in particular doublet structure of spectral lines and the separation of a chemical element into two isotopes.
— Wolfgang Pauli, Atom and Archetype: The Pauli/Jung Letters 1932-58
Do Not Dictate a Child through Someone, it Ruins the Child's Experience.
— Vineet Raj Kapoor
Accept it all your so called SINS are only a result of your unawareness and nothing else, No sooner you realize this simple fact, you're instantly transformed. Stay Guilt Free, Celebrate Life!
— Ramana Pemmaraju
I am in good company, simply following those in front of me and knowing others are following behind. We are on our way up a narrow staircase. The bannister is a thick rope suggesting safety. The stairs go around and around inside a church tower; or perhaps it is a minaret? The whorls of the staircase grow narrower and narrower, but as there are so many people behind there is no longer any possibility of turning around or even stopping. The pressure from behind foeces me on. The staircase suddenly stops at a garbage chute in the wall. When i open the hatch and squeeze my way through the hole, i find myself on the outside of the tower. The rope has dissappeared. It is totally dark. I cling on to the slippery, icy wall of the tower while vainly trying to find a foothold in the emptiness.
— Sven Lindqvist, Exterminate All the Brutes: &, Desert Divers
Mindless action without a real understanding of the ramifications is only likely to result in serious miscalculations or a colossal waste of time. Avoid both by using your judgment, filtered through both knowledge and experience. Use common sense and logic as a counterbalance to emotion.
— David Amerland, The Sniper Mind: Eliminate Fear, Deal with Uncertainty, and Make Better Decisions
Moral deliberation has to be somewhere in the brain, after all. It’s not going to be in the foot or the stomach, and it’s certainly not going to reside in some mysterious immaterial realm. So who cares about precisely where?
— Paul Bloom, Against Empathy: The Case for Rational Compassion
...the mind that is collectively orientated is quite incapable of thinking and feeling in any other way than by projection.
— C.G. Jung
Loneliness is the manifestation of the conflict between our desire for meaning and the absence of objective meaning from the universe.
— Neel Burton, Heaven and Hell: The Psychology of the Emotions
Solitude, the joy of being alone, stems from, as well as promotes, a state of maturity and inner richness.
— Neel Burton, Heaven and Hell: The Psychology of the Emotions
The ultimate purpose of psychology is to release from psychology.
— Shai Tubali, A Guide to Bliss: Transforming Your Life through Mind Expansion
Take the wheat, not the measure in which it is contained
— Idries Shah, The Sufis
Rather than being guided by images of how to be, people need to attend to how they actually are and to respect this.
— Leslie S. Greenberg, Facilitating Emotional Change: The Moment-by-Moment Process
Suicide is a permanent answer to a temporary problem." They say, it's not an "answer" in any way. Taking your own life is SE Self Execution, many have said that's a terrible name. I ask should killing yourself sound good?
— Stanley Victor Paskavich
The wish to gain complete possession of somebody is expressed most plainly by jealousy. Jealousy is never a sign of love. It only indicates fear of not being able to hold another person.
— Rudolf Dreikurs
Individuality should not translate to narcissism. Realizing the strength of individuality is an accomplishment while being narcissistic is a failure.
— Amitav Chowdhury
Dissatisfaction with status quo is the psychology behind creative disruptions.
— Pearl Zhu, 100 Creativity Ingredients: Everyone's Playbook to Unlock Creativity
Everything is up to psychology and Mindset.
— Deyth Banger
Dear Sigmund,Multiple Personality Disorder is a much discussed topic in my one bedroom bedsit."Signed....Thomas, Jane, Ralf, Tom, Toomey and Spot
— Anthony T. Hincks
One mistake is all they see.
— Joyce Rachelle
More often than not, it’s disrespectful to them (our children) - and disrespectful to their struggle with their tasks in life- if our own anxiety as parents makes us cling to our children. It’s disrespectful is we demand more intimacy than they are willing or able to give. Too much involvement with our children is not an act of love- it’s an act of selfishness.
— Daniel Gottlieb, Voices in the Family: A Therapist Talks About Listening, Openness & Healing
As our children turn even five or six degrees away from us, we have to be aware of our fear and our excitement and our hope for them. And as that five or sex degrees turns into ten or twenty degrees, even ninety degrees, we have to monitor those feelings every step of the way-and ultimately realize that our child is another human being and not necessarily and extension of us.
— Daniel Gottlieb, Voices in the Family: A Therapist Talks About Listening, Openness & Healing
Woe to him who offends a patient man who has just reached his limit.
— Joyce Rachelle
Try staying awake for 24 hours and you'll realize just how many needless worries your mind instantly shuts out.
— Joyce Rachelle
I am learning through my work with Liz that part of being healthy is being able to hold and remember who people actually are instead of who we wish they were. It's a daily struggle against a brain that tends to want to cling to a fairy-tale hope, but it's also the only way to guarantee a life surrounded by those who build rather than destroy. In the end, the loss is about letting go of what I never had in the first place.
— Kerry Kletter, The First Time She Drowned
As a child, I was very careful not to erase my mother's writing on the chalkboard because I would miss her.
— Joyce Rachelle
I am learning through my work with Liz that part of being healthy is being able to hold and remember who people actually are instead of who we wish they were. It's a daily struggle against a brain that tends to want to cling to a fairy-tale hope, but it's also the only way to guarantee a life surrounded by those who build rather than destroy. In the end, the loss is about go of what I never had in the first place.
— Kerry Kletter, The First Time She Drowned
There is a way of reacting to insult that gives people the impression that you want more. I don't know what it is, but I seem to have mastered it.
— Joyce Rachelle
Dear World,I exist.Deal with it.
— Joyce Rachelle
Our heads are filled with ‘knowledge’, a knowledge that in some areas pre-empts our seeing anything at all.
— Idries Shah, The World of the Sufi: An Anthology of Writings about Sufis and Their Work
Only in the love of those who do not serve a purpose, love begins to unfold.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
When emotions are long held and extremely complex, it sometimes takes years for them to enter fully into awareness.
— Sharon Salzberg, Real Love: The Art of Mindful Connection
I love to share my problems with friends. They think I'm revealing my personal life, but I'm actually revealing theirs. What a person does with what you give reveals the real character of such person, and you can envision and predict a whole set of interactions through their life and based on such reactions. You can even predict how long their marriage will last, or what they will do when you need them.
— Robin Sacredfire
The secure attachment of Western psychology is actually akin to Buddhist non-attachment
—  avoid-ant attachment is the inverse of being mindful and present
Presence and AbsenceA certain person may have, as you say, a wonderful presence: I do not know. What I do know is that he has a perfectly delightful absence.
— Idries Shah, Reflections
You don't kill your ego. You overcome it by loving other people. And for that you need both ego and super-ego.
— Robin Sacredfire
Getting drunk every Friday night and thinking that it's normal, only to get mad every Monday, looks normal only because most people are insane. It becomes abnormal when it affects your relationshipsand you push people you want away with a smile and cry when they're gone. That's when a person should question her own sanity. If that still doesn't make one question it, then that's a very deep stage of insanity. That's not life. That's the scenario for an apocalyptic movie.
— Robin Sacredfire
A father hurt by his son realizes how much he hurt his father!
— I are
A cricketer who hits a century in one match may score zero in the next, if he does not have the same outfit, shoes and bat that he used in the first match. In fact, many sportsmen keep some kind of talisman in their pocket that acts as a lucky charm for their game. Here the talisman or the outfit doesn’t possess any magical power that helps the player to perform better. But it is their own subconscious reliance on the charm, that makes them give their best.
— Abhijit Naskar
He stands alone in hollow gloom, with the sound of his own breath whispering down unseen passages ahead and behind and to both sides, wondering how he stumbled into this blackest of all labyrinths.He entered by choice. We all do. Whether we are mapping the heavens or skulking the lanes of the underworld, whether we are hunting the imprisoned fiend or have ourselves become the monster, whether we are searching for what is lost or hiding what must never be found, we all round that first corner by choice - and by then, we are lost.You too. You must decide what is false and what is true, and what is true for me but not for you. We are wandering the mazes, all of us, and we cannot hope to escape until we learn to tell between what is real and what is real for someone else. There lies the madness, and the truth as well.
— Troy Denning, Pages of Pain
It was the perfect set. Theseus gave a great war cry and brought his sword arcing up toward Sheba’s throat - but the monster of the labyrinth lives inside us all. She is the dark, devouring hunger that is never sated, the creeping shadow that ever plays the fiend to our seraphim, the secret rage hidden in our hearts; deny her, and we become her slaves; fight her, and we make her invincible. By now, you must know that no monster can ever be killed, not really - […]
— Troy Denning, Pages of Pain
To be quite accurate, human nature is simply what it is; it has its dark and its light sides. The sum of all colours is grey - light on a dark background or dark on light.
— C.G. Jung, Psychological Types
Authenticity inspires. Just be real.
— Renae A. Sauter, An Empowered Life: Mind/Body/Spirit Empowerment
We now expect more from technology and less from each other.
— Sherry Turkle
I wanted to feel less.To not be burdened by emotion,To not feel sadness,To not know loss.I envied the inanimate,The trees that stand proudly in winter,Not missing their leaves.
— Jacqueline Simon Gunn
Some expectation are inevitable but the problem happens when we are not able to measure the likelihood of reciprocation or fulfillment. We fail as measuring instruments, and so we drag & impose our expectations and ourselves along.
— Ashlecka Aumrivani
We are all tips of the iceberg.
— Ashlecka Aumrivani
Laughter is a threat to aging.
— Ashlecka Aumrivani
Because we idealize Giving so much, we ignore the ability, blessing, and duty to Receive.
— Ashlecka Aumrivani
They wish to make a medical thing of evil. Madness is also such a useful metaphor, for that which we would rather not face...
— Robert K. Tanenbaum, No Lesser Plea
Action is within your control, while Emotion is beyond your control!
— Ramana Pemmaraju
When you are in alignment with your life purpose
—  there will be a knowing in your heart that is so strong
We all struggle. It's just that some of us struggle out loud and some of us don't.
— Renae A. Sauter, An Empowered Life: Mind/Body/Spirit Empowerment
Psychology has falsified love as surrender and altruism, while it is an appropriation or a bestowal following from a super-abundance of personality. Only the most complete persons can love. The depersonalized and objective are the worst lovers.
— Friedrich Nietzsche, The Will to Power
Love is not primarily a relationship to a specific person; it is an attitude, an orientation of character which determines the relatedness of a person to the world as a whole, not toward one "object" of love. If a person loves only one other person and is indifferent to the rest of his fellow men, his love is not love but a symbiotic attachment, or an enlarged egotism.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
...a woman smart and persistent enough that even a PhD in psychology hasn't clouded her insight into how people think and act.
— Derrick Jensen, Endgame, Vol. 1: The Problem of Civilization
Never for one minute have I taken you for reality . . . You are a lie, you are my illness, you are a phantom . . . You are my hallucination. You are the incarnation of myself . . . of my thoughts and feelings, but only the nastiest and stupidest of them.
— Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov
Training is a loop, a two-way communication in which an event at one end of the loop changes events at the other, exactly like a cybernetic feedback system; yet many psychologists treat their work as something they do to a subject, not with the subject.
— Karen Pryor, Don't Shoot the Dog!: The New Art of Teaching and Training
Women always cried. It was their last, best weapon. It made boyfriends apologize and husbands fold them in their arms. It made Daddy spend the extra money on the prom dress.
— Barry Lyga, Game
This experience of being loved by mother is a passive one. There is nothing I have to do in order to be loved—mother's love is unconditional. All I have to do is to be—to be her child. Mother's love is bliss, is peace, it need not be acquired, it need not be deserved.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
Unconditional love corresponds to one of the deepest longings, not only of the child, but of every human being; on the other hand, to be loved because of one's merit, because one deserves it, always leaves doubt; maybe I did not please the person whom I want to love me,maybe this, or that—there is always a fear that love could disappear. Furthermore, "deserved" love easily leaves a bitter feeling that one is not loved for oneself, that one is loved only because one pleases, that one is, in the last analysis, not loved at all but used.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
The two centrepieces of social intelligence are the possession of extensive social knowledge about other individuals, in terms of knowing who allies and friends are, and the ability to infer the mental states of those individuals.
— Steven Mithen, The Prehistory of the Mind: The Cognitive Origins of Art, Religion and Science
It's well established that when people are places in uncomfortably negative situations, they will frequently resort to dark humor as a coping mechanism to help relieve some of the heaviness that surrounds them.
— Micheal Slusher
Follow the truth and you will never get lost.
— Renae A. Sauter, An Empowered Life: Mind/Body/Spirit Empowerment
People carry on whole conversations in proverbs. But they are not LIVING the proverbs.
— Idries Shah
My parents, you see, were a little square. They cared more about being good parents in the general sense than being good parents for me. They wanted to appear normal; respectable and responsible. But they weren’t prepared to acknowledge my individual needs.
— Joss Sheldon, The Little Voice
Grief is NOT a mental illness or an emotional disorder. Anyone who tells you otherwise has never experienced it for themselves.
— Rebecca McNutt
The creature who lives inside my brain suggested I do it,” I offered tentatively. “It was very convincing.
— Joss Sheldon, The Little Voice
Without confidence we feel insecure. We replay the doubting voices of our parents on a loop in our own minds.
— Steven Franssen, Make Self-Knowledge Great Again
The polarity between the male and female principles exists also within each man and each woman. Just as physiologically man and woman each have hormones of the opposite sex, they are bisexual also in the psychological sense. They carry in themselves the principle of receiving and of penetrating, of matter and of spirit. Man—and woman—finds union within himself only in the union of his female and his male polarity. This polarity is the basis for all creativity.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
The very few among us who have earned the title psychopath, are the ones who deny or destroy their inner voice, their conscience: so that they are free to prey upon whom they wish with exuberance and abandon, do harm to others for their own pleasure. The sociopaths and psychopaths of the world who can put on a great show of caring but never be true to the character they deceptively portray to the world: Sick and Sadistic, Vulgar and Pathetic, the pedophiles and incestuous minded men and women who create brokenness and damage. Some are turned on by the taboos that are universally avoided because it is so obviously wrong, they love the feeling of power as they rape the sensitivity of the moral majority.
— Sara Niles, The Journey
It is easier to understand mankind in general than any individual man.
— François de La Rochefoucauld
I don't have to say so because people can see it from leagues away. I am ugly, shy and anachronistic, but by dint of not wanting to be those things I have pretended to be just the opposite.
— Gabriel García Márquez, Memories of My Melancholy Whores
Don’t focus on the action, focus on the mentality behind the action. Analyzing the mentality will help us differentiate between a one-time error and a long-term character flaw.
— Izey Victoria Odiase
Trust is needed before lessons can be learnt.
— Idries Shah, Sufi Thought and Action
Proverbs and truisms are for this reason dangerous, because they produce blindness or non-thought.
— Idries Shah
Major Trapp was never there. Instead he remained in Jozefow because he allegedly could not bear the sight. We men were upset about that and said we couldn't bear the sight either." Indeed, Trapp's distress was a secret to no one. At the marketplace one policeman remembered hearing Trapp say, "Oh God, why did I have to be given these orders," as he put his hand on his heart. Another policeman witnessed him at the schoolhouse. "Today, I can still see exactly before my eyes Major Trapp there in the room pacing back and forth with his hands behind his back. He said something like, 'Man, ... such jobs don't suit me. But orders are orders.' " Another man remembered vividly "how Trapp, finally alone in our room, sat on a stool and wept bitterly. The tears really flowed." Another also witnessed Trapp at his headquarters. "Major Trapp ran around excitedly and then suddenly stopped dead in front of me, stared and asked if I agreed with this. I looked him straight in the eye and said 'No, Herr Major!' He then began to run around again and wept like a child." The doctor's aide encountered Trapp weeping on the path from the marketplace to the forest and asked if he could help. "He answered me only to the effect that everything was very terrible." Concerning Jozefow, Trapp later confined to his driver, "If this Jewish business is ever avenged on earth, then have mercy on us Germans.
— Christopher R. Browning, Ordinary Men: Reserve Police Battalion 101 and the Final Solution in Poland
If you let others influence you, they will also let you influence them. But if you're only trying to teach them something, and put your ideas into people's brains, you will never succeed.
— Lev
When you go into the psych ward, you can’t have anything with you except colored pencils. You can’t have any electronics. If you have a drawstring on your pants, a belt, shoelaces, a hood, or extra-long fabric, your very clothes are ripped off your back. They search you with a metal detector like you’re a criminal, doing everything short of putting their hand up your butt. Before you go through those cold, automatic, barred doors, you know your life is not your own. This is especially true during the first week, while you stare at florescent lighting and wait impatiently for your meds to kick in. I wish I had remembered the psych ward prison cell a week ago. If I had, maybe I wouldn’t be wearing this hospital gown that they gave me until I can get more compliant clothes.
— Jacquelyn Nicole Davis, Trace The Grace: A Memoir
The problem of knowing man is parallel to the religious problem of knowing God. In conventional Western theology the attempt is made to know God by thought, to make statements about God. It is assumed that I can know God in my thought. In mysticism, which is the consequent outcome of monotheism, the attempt is given up to know God by thought, and it is replaced by the experience of union with God in which there is no more room—and no need—for knowledge about God.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
There are many good things about getting older, but no one knows what they are.
— Daniel Gilbert
The same goes for Edward Monkford. Yes, based on what you've told me, it seems Emma was the real narcissist, not him. But there's no doubting he's an extreme controller. What happens when a controller comes up against someone who's out of control? The combination could be explosive.
— J.P. Delaney, The Girl Before
Eventually, her designed genetic material will be implanted into my egg, which first would have had my genetic material removed. Then my mother could become my baby. And someday, when I get old, I can become her baby. Then she will be mine, and I will be hers.
— Jack Gantos, The Love Curse Of The Rumbaughs
Humanism is not a single character. It is a magnificent blend of various emotional and behavioral traits that are unique to the human mind.
— Abhijit Naskar, The Islamophobic Civilization: Voyage of Acceptance
When it is time for religion to vanish from the face of earth upon having finished its service of psychological reinforcement to humanity, Mother Nature will make that happen one way or another.
— Abhijit Naskar, The Islamophobic Civilization: Voyage of Acceptance
Figure out what you care about...and then care about it
— Ben Sedley, Stuff That Sucks: A Teen's Guide to Accepting What You Can't Change and Committing to What You Can
It seems a bad thing and detrimental to the creative work of the mind if Reason makes to close an examination of the ideas as they come pouring in -at the very gateway, as it were. Looked at in isolation, a thought may seem very trivial or very fantastic; but it may be made important by another thought that comes after it, and in conjunction with other thoughts that may seem equally absurd, it may serve to form a most effective link. Reason cannot form any opinion on all this unless it retains the thought long enough to look at it in connection with the others. On the other hand, where there is a creative mind, Reason -so it seems to me- relaxes its watch upon the gates, and the ideas rush in pell-mell, and only then does it look them through and examine them in a mass.
— Friedrich Schiller
People with OCD including myself, realize that their seemingly uncontrollable behavior is irrational, but they feel unable to stop it.
— Abhijit Naskar, The Islamophobic Civilization: Voyage of Acceptance
Often during writing, I am compelled by OCD to delete and rewrite a word or sentence over and over again.
— Abhijit Naskar, The Islamophobic Civilization: Voyage of Acceptance
A small amount of good literature can often teach more about the inner life than volumes of psychology.
— Thomas  Moore, Original Self: Living with Paradox and Originality
even I get angry ,as I see something lovable ,immediately I want to hug him indeep love .anger takes a place of flowof breathing in peace
— litymunshi
I don't need psychologyI am not a sociopathNeither and Psychopath
— Deyth Banger
I consider therapy successful when the family members (or individual clients) have discovered ways to get what they need from their relationships with the people in their lives, so that their relationship with me is no longer necessary to sustain them. Like a chemical catalyst that facilitates a reaction between two other substances, the therapeutic relationship catalyzes the transformation of relationships in the lives of clients. But the real healing takes place not in the therapeutic relationship but in the client's relationships with significant others.
— Joseph A. Micucci, The Adolescent in Family Therapy: Harnessing the Power of Relationships
Figure out what you care about... and then care about it
— Ben Sedley, Stuff That Sucks: A Teen's Guide to Accepting What You Can't Change and Committing to What You Can
Techniques are like tools: The more you have, the more options for getting a job done - but you have to know what you are building first.
— Joseph A. Micucci, The Adolescent in Family Therapy: Harnessing the Power of Relationships
In cases where treatment with medication is warranted, work on family interactions will help to reduce symptom severity and promote better functioning in the long run.
— Joseph A. Micucci, The Adolescent in Family Therapy: Harnessing the Power of Relationships
Embrace the anxiety of confronting your emotions because it’s often the emotional hitting of rock bottom that ignites our resolve to get back to the top.
— Sam Owen, 500 Relationships And Life Quotes: Bite-Sized Advice For Busy People
…You decide that, rather than trying to talk out of the fixed mindset [to your kid], you have to live the growth mindset, you have to live the growth mindset. AT the dinner table each evening, you and your partner structure the discussion around the growth mindset, asking each child (and each other): “What did you learn today?” “What mistake did you make that taught you something?” “What did you try hard at today?” You go around the table with each question, excitedly discussing your own and one another’s effort, strategies, setbacks, and learning.
— Carol S. Dweck, Mindset: The New Psychology of Success
What a person considers the minimal necessities depends as much on his character as it depends on his actual possessions.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
The significance of the dwelling is in the dweller.
— Idries Shah, The Dermis Probe
People think that to love is simple, but that to find the right object to love - or to be loved by - is difficult.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
The sexual act without love never bridges the gap between two human beings, except momentarily..
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
The deepest need of man, then, is the need to overcome his separateness, to leave the prison of his aloneness. The absolute failure to achieve this aim means insanity, because the panic of complete isolation can be overcome only by such a radical withdrawal from the world outside that the feeling of separation disappears—because the world outside, from which one is separated, has disappeared.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
The sexual act without love never bridges the gap between two human beings, except momentarily.
— Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
In a fascinating study, Barrett (1999) demonstrated that children as young as threeyears of age have a sophisticated cognitive understanding of predator-prey encounters. Children from both an industrialized culture and a traditional hunter-horticulturalist culture wereable to spontaneously describe the flow of events in a predator-prey encounter in an ecologically accurate way. Moreover, they understood that after a lion kills a prey, the prey is no longer alive, can no longer eat, and can no longer run and that the dead state is permanent.This sophisticated understanding of death from encounters with predators appears to be developed by age three to four.
— David M. Buss, Evolutionary Psychology: The New Science of the Mind, Fifth Edition
Rape is something very obscene and this act must always be intervened by authorities, so victims will not end up suffering from a post traumatic disorder.
— Saaif Alam
If you bewilder other people about your self identify, this shows that you are behaving really good in disguise. Also, if posses this kind of personality, you will likely have no remorse for your mistake and you will eventually lose your trust from others.
— Saaif Alam
If you bewilder other people about your self identify, this shows that you are being behaving really good in disguise. Also, if posses this kind of personality, you will likely have no remorse for your mistake and you will eventually lose your trust from others.
— Saaif Alam
Donald Trump has been called, by psychologists and clinical psychologists, over and over again, a narcissist with multiple sociopathic and psychopathic tendencies.
— Gizmo, The Puzzled Puppy, What Donald Trump Supporters Need to Know: But Are Too Infatuated to Figure Out
Unlike the hollow, risk-pursuing few who are deprived of a seventh sense [conscience], you will go through your life fully aware of the warm and comforting, infuriating, confusing, compelling, and sometimes joyful presence of other human beings, and along with your conscience you will be given the chance to take the largest risk of all, which, as we all know, is to love.
— Martha Stout Ph.D.
The so-called mystical characters of India, whom you call in many ways, such as “swami”, “baba” and “guru” are nothing but an informal, cheap and primitive substitute for modern psychotherapists or counsellors.
— Abhijit Naskar, Prescription: Treating India's Soul
Archetypes are the mirror images of our never to be seen self
— Budel
Don't you ever think that maybe the reason behind why heroes are so dedicated to saving people is because they want to finish them off in the end? I mean, in that case, the villains should be the heroes and the heroes should be the villains so that the hero-villains won't be mistaken with the villain-heroes and the villains can be friends with the heroes. And the entire villain-hero and hero-villain world can be one big happy family. With me stuck in the middle.
— Polkadot
But there also seems to be in our culture a curious cautiousness—“You’ll get these abundant gratifications only if you don’t feel too much, don’t let on you want too much.” The result is that, instead of conquering the world like Horatio Alger, we should wait passively until the genie of technology—which we don’t push or influence, only await—brings us our appointed gratifications. All of this is a part of the rewards which go with belief in the vast myth of the machine in the twentieth century.
— Rollo May, Love and Will
You are the result of the tension between who you think you should be and what you really are.
— Frank F. Gelat
It is only when you meet someoneof a different culture from yourself that you begin to realize what your ownbeliefs really are.
— George Orwell, The Road to Wigan Pier
The desire to understand is almost synonymous with the desire to simplify, and it is closely bound up with the desire for certainty - for assurance. But, when we find we have over-simplified, this does not necessarily imply that our conclusions are wrong. It implies merely that they are less right than we thought, or that we have exaggerated their comprehensiveness.
— Rupert Crawshay-Williams, The Comforts of Unreason: A Study of the Motives Behind Irrational Thought
It is only when you meet someone of a different culture from yourself that you begin to realize what your own beliefs really are.
— George Orwell, The Road to Wigan Pier
The relationship between these four attitudes—objectivity, immediacy, subjectivity, and reflexion—is worth consideration. At first sight it might seem that there is no difference between immediacy and subjectivity, or between objectivity and reflexion. Subjectivity and objectivity, certainly, are opposed; and so are immediacy and reflexion. But immediacy (which is naive acceptance of whatever is presented) is compatible with objectivity, as we see from Thomas Huxley's advice to the scientist: 'Sit down before fact as a little child'—; and reflexion is compatible with subjectivity (for subjectivity is 'being oneself', and reflexion, being 'self awareness', is within subjectivity). In emotional excitement objectivity and reflexion alike tend to vanish, and subjectivity then approximates to immediacy. It is this that gives subjectivity its bad name; for few people know of any subjectivity beyond emotional immediacy. Their escape from emotion is towards objectivity, in the form of distractions, rather than towards reflexion, which is the more difficult way of self control. Goethe once described the advice 'Know Thyself' (inscribed in the temple of Apollo at Delphi) as 'a singular requisition with which no man complies, or indeed ever will comply: man is by all his senses and efforts directed to externals—to the world about him'.
— Nanavira Thera
To spoil means to put no limit on caprice, to give one the impression that everything is permitted to him and that he has no obligations. The young child exposed to this regime has no experience of its own limits. By reason of the removal of all external restraint, all clashing with other things, he comes actually to believe that he is the only one that exists, and gets used to not considering others, especially not considering them as superior to himself. This feeling of another's superiority could only be instilled into him by someone who, being stronger than he is, should force him to give up some desire, to restrict himself, to restrain himself. He would then have learned this fundamental discipline: "Here I end and here begins another more powerful than I am. In the world, apparently, there are two people: I myself and another superior to me.
— Ortega y Gasset
Truth is a matter of PerspectiveThere will be my truth and your truth and as Universal truth doesn't exist.
— George Orwell
But unfortunately you get no further by merely wishing class-distinctions away. More exactly, it is necessary to wish them away, but your wish has no efficacy unless you grasp what it involves. The fact that has got to be faced is that to abolish class-distinctions means abolishing a part of yourself. Here am I, a typical member of the middle class. It is easy for me to say that I want to get rid of class-distinctions, but nearly everything I think and do is a result of class-distinctions. All my notions –notions of good and evil, of pleasant and unpleasant, of funny and serious, of ugly and beautiful–are essentially middle-class notions; my taste in books and food and clothes, my sense of honour, my table manners, my turns of speech, my accent, even the characteristic movements of my body, are the products of a special kind of upbringing and a special niche about half-way up the social hierarchy.
— George Orwell
But unfortunately you get no further by merely wishing class-distinctionsaway. More exactly, it is necessary to wish them away, but your wish has noefficacy unless you grasp what it involves. The fact that has got to be faced isthat to abolish class-distinctions means abolishing a part of yourself. Here amI, a typical member of the middle class. It is easy for me to say that I want toget rid of class-distinctions, but nearly everything I think and do is a result ofclass-distinctions. All my notions –notions of good and evil, of pleasant and unpleasant,of funny and serious, of ugly and beautiful–are essentially middle-classnotions; my taste in books and food and clothes, my sense of honour, my tablemanners, my turns of speech, my accent, even the characteristic movements ofmy body, are the products of a special kind of upbringing and a special nicheabout half-way up the social hierarchy.
— George Orwell, The Road to Wigan Pier
The rich believe that their money will insulate them from setbacks and frustrations, and that's one of the absurdist expectations of all.
— (Alain de Botton)
The premise of this book is that it is easier to recognize other people's mistakes than our own.
— Daniel Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow
The price we pay for being different may be severe.
— Unknown
People whose eyes shine are happy to be alive. They see life and it’s glory even when things aren’t easy.And because they see life, even through all the problems and obstacles, their eyes shine.
— Jelena Pantić, Journey to the Center of the Heart
Aronson's first law:People who do crazy things are not necessarily crazy.
— Elliot Aronson, The Social Animal
Anything that tends to make us elated is inevitably going to throw us into depression.
— Eknath Easwaran, The End of Sorrow
Deeply entrenched fantasies and persistent, most cherished illusions can at least partly be explained as ‘bugs’ or ‘viruses’ in, or ‘mis-activations’ of, our sophisticated and highly sensitive intellectual software, which is driven but also easily disrupted by, and addicted to, our restless and insatiable need for meaning, order, control, and reassurance.
— Azar Gat, War in Human Civilization
Most people are asleep and need to be confronted, like adults that are still behaving like they're 5 years old, and don't want to assume responsibility for their mistakes.
— Robin Sacredfire
I always imagined that you might write something about me. I wanted to leave an imprint on your life. I don’t want to be “just another patient”. I wanted to be “special”. I want to be something, anything. I feel like nothing, no one. If I left an imprint on your life, maybe I would be someone, someone you wouldn’t forget. I’d exist then. (Marge’s letter to Yalom)
— Irvin D. Yalom, Love's Executioner and Other Tales of Psychotherapy
For a man, the optimal evolutionary strategy is to disseminate his genes as widely as possible, given his few minutes (or, alas, seconds) of investment in each encounter. It all makes simple evolutionary sense, since a woman invests a good deal of time and effort -a nine month long, risky, strenuous pregnancy, in each offspring. Naturally she has to be very discerning in her choice of sexual partners.
— Abhijit Naskar, Neurosutra: The Abhijit Naskar Collection
Today we are living the grotesque spectacle of the poisoningof the earth by the nineteenth-century hero system of unrestrainedmaterial production. This is perhaps the greatest and most pervasiveevil to have emerged in all of history, and it may eveneventually defeat all of mankind. Still there are no "twisted" peoplewhom we can hold responsible for this.
— Ernest Becker, Escape from Evil
That just seems to be the way we’re built.
— Irvin D. Yalom, Love's Executioner and Other Tales of Psychotherapy
Narcissistic cathexis of the child by the mother does not exclude emotional devotion. On the contrary, she loves the child as her self-object, excessively, though not in the manner that he needs, and always on the condition that he presents his "false self." This is no obstacle to the development of intellectual abilities, but it is one to the unfolding of an authentic emotional life.
— Alice  Miller, The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self
Speculation was now news. News had been confused with fact. Fact had been replaced by expert opinion. People had been replaced by their biographies. Ability had been replaced by disability. Thinking had been replaced by psychology. History had been reduced to story. And while the news media pumped out a new story every week on things that could kill you, Hollywood simultaneously created stories that showed that everything could be prevailed over. Meaning, he said, was so malleable that it could be turned inside out, and no one would know the difference—and it would—and, just like the universe that had expanded to its maximum size, everything that had ever been would happen in reverse and revert back to its original form until existence would disappear without leaving a trace of itself as the Big Bang backfired.
— John M. Keller, Abracadabrantesque
There was a time when Men functioned through the mind and Women from their heart, now its Men who feel more and women think more...
— Ramana Pemmaraju
Life is stress by definition.
— Rebecca McNutt, Mandy and Alecto: The Collected Smog City Book Series
But, if I dare say it, it wasn't until I had helped kill a man that I realized how elusive and complex an act a murder can actually be, and not necessarily attributable to one dramatic motive.
— Donna Tartt, The Secret History
Philosophically speaking, values are the termini of our intentions. We never fully achieve them.
— Gordon W. Allport, Becoming: Basic Considerations for a Psychology of Personality
I consider it a dangerous misconception of mental hygiene to assume that what man needs in the first place is equilibrium or, as it is called in biology, "homeostasis," i.e., a tensionless state. What man actually needs is not a tensionless state but rather the striving and struggling for a worthwhile goal, a freely chosen task.
— Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
A man's concern, even his despair, over the worthwhileness of life is an existential distress but by no means a mental disease. It may well be that interpreting the first in terms of the latter motivates a doctor to bury his patient's existential despair under a heap of tranquilizing drugs. It is his task, rather , to pilot the patient through his existential crises of growth and development.
— Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
Indeed the measure of our intellectual maturity, one philosopher suggests, is our capacity to feel less and less satisfied with our answers to better and better problems.
— Gordon W. Allport, Becoming: Basic Considerations for a Psychology of Personality
Man's search for meaning is the primary motivation in his life and not a "secondary rationalization" of instinctual drives.
— Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
Love is as primary a phenomenon as sex. Normally, sex is a mode of expression for love. Sex is justified, even sanctified, as soon as, but only as long as, it is a vehicle of love. Thus love is not understood as a mere side-effect of sex; rather, sex is a way of expressing the experience of that ultimate togetherness which is called love.
— Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
There is a widespread belief about quantum mechanics, as also about relativity, that it is something that one is entitled to ignore for most ordinary philosophical and scientific purposes, since it only seriously applies at the micro level of reality; where 'micro' means something far smaller than would show up in any conventional microscope. What sits on top of this micro level, so the assumption runs, is a sufficiently good approximation of the old classical Newtonian picture to justify our continuing, as philosophers, to think about the world in essentially classical terms. I believe this to be a fundamental mistake. What I shall be arguing...is that the world is quantum-mechanical through and through; and that the classical picture of reality is, even at the microscopic level, deeply inadequate.
— Stephen T. DeBerry, Quantum Psychology: Steps to a Postmodern Ecology of Being
[M]ental health is based on a certain degree of tension, the tension between what one has already achieved and what one still ought to accomplish, or the gap between what one is and what one should become. Such a tension is inherent in the human being and therefore is indispensable to mental wellbeing.
— Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
we do not ask. We want to be told. One of the most curious things in the structure of our psyche is that we all want to be told because we are the result of the propaganda of ten thousand years. We want to have our thinking confirmed and corroborated by another, whereas to ask a question is to ask it of yourself.
— Jiddu Krishnamurti, Freedom from the Known
You -have- to love your monster.
— Philippa Dowding, Everton Miles Is Stranger Than Me: The Night Flyer's Handbook
Feelings are not to be suppressed or fixed — they’re to be acknowledged.
— Jennifer Lane, Spiked