c2p-cmd/Good-Quotes-Authors huggingface dataset:
I realized that cats make a perfect audience, they don't laugh at you, they never contradict you, there's no need to impress them, and they won't divulge your secrets.
— Elle Newmark, The Book of Unholy Mischief
Dogs are not like cats, who amusingly tolerate humans only until someone comes up with a tin opener that can be operated with a paw. Men made dogs, they took wolves and gave them human things--unnecessary intelligence, names, a desire to belong, and a twitching inferiority complex. All dogs dream wolf dreams, and know they're dreaming of biting their Maker. Every dog knows, deep in his heart, that he is a Bad Dog...
— Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms
Human beings are drawn to cats because they are all we are not — self-contained, elegant in everything they do, relaxed, assured, glad of company, yet still possessing secret lives.
— Pam Brown
Because I’m a cat. A big one, the Panther of Rough Storms, in fact. But still a cat. If there’s a saucer of milk to spill, I’d rather spill it than let it lie. If my mistress grows absent-minded and leaves a ball of yarn about, I’ll bat it between my paws, and unravel it. Because it’s fun. Because it’s what cats do best.
— Catherynne M. Valente, The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Making
Rousseau pounced. Men who dislike cats were tyrannical: "They do not like cats because the cat is free and will never consent to become a slave.
— Robert Zaretsky, The Philosophers' Quarrel: Rousseau, Hume, and the Limits of Human Understanding
The amazing activity of the cat is delicately balanced by his capacity for relaxation. Every household should contain a cat, not only for decorative and domestic values, but because the cat in quiescence is medicinal to irritable, tense, tortured men and women.
— William Lyon Phelps
God made the cat to give man the pleasure of stroking a tiger.
— Joseph Méry
I woke up in bed with a man and a cat. The man was a stranger
—  the cat was not
It is a curious truth that many cats enjoy warmer, more convivial, even affectionate relationships with humans than they could ever do with fellow felines.
— Bruce Fogle
Cats have a sort of game they play when they meet. A player alternates between watching the strange cat and ignoring her, grooming or examining everything around herself - a dead leaf, a cloud - with complete absorption. It is almost accidental how the two cats approach, a sidelong step and then the sitting again. This often ends in a flurry of spitting and slashing claws, too fast to see clearly, and then one or the other (or both) of the cats leap out of range. The game can have one exchange or many - and is not so different from the first meetings of women.
— Kij Johnson, Fudoki
I have noticed that what cats most appreciate in a human being is not the ability to produce food - which they take for granted - but his or her entertainment value. Asmodeus took to his toy enthusiastically. In another week he permitted me to stroke him, producing a raucous purr, but, in order to save his face, pretending to be asleep.
— Geoffrey Household, Rogue Male
# "I saw the most beautiful cat today. It was sitting by the side of the road, its two front feet neatly and graciously together. Then it gravely swished around its tail to completely encircle itself. It was so fit and beautifully neat, that gesture, and so self-satisfied, so complacent.
— Anne Morrow Lindbergh
i wish i had 15-20 cats that would serve as a blanket, like if i moved they would adjust to my new position, that would be good
— Megan Boyle
Loud ringing noises, I've discovered, upset Mr.Peepers.
— Meg Cabot, The Boy Next Door
The cat Horus shot out from under the table and headed for the door, his ears flattened and his tail straight out. There he encountered Abdullah, who had been waiting for us on the verandah and who had, I supposed, been alarmed by Emerson's shouts and hurried to discover what disaster had prompted them. The cat got entangled in Abdullah's skirts and a brief interval of staggering (by Abdullah), scratching (by Horus) and swearing (by both parties) ensued before Horus freed himself and departed. 
— Elizabeth Peters, The Ape Who Guards the Balance
i wish cats could float around your head
— Megan Boyle, Selected Unpublished Blog Posts of a Mexican Panda Express Employee
Look, we need to make time, but we also need to be somewhat quiet." She faced him. "I am being quiet!"Pathik held a finger up to his lips. "Seriously. Quite. You don't really want to attract a lot of attention out here if you can help it."Rachel didn't like the sound of that. "Are there sheep-cats?
— Teri Hall, The Line
Cats tell me without effort all that there is to know.
— Charles Bukowski, On Cats
The Lady Amalthea beckoned, and the cat wriggled all over, like a dog, but he would not come near... She was offering her open palm to the crook-eared cat, but he stayed where he was, shivering with the desire to go to her"...[later, Molly asked the cat] "Why were you afraid to let her touch you? I saw you. You were afraid of her.""If she had touched me," he said very softly, "I would have been hers and not my own, not ever again. I wanted her to touch me but I could not let her. No cat will... The price is more than a cat can pay.
— Peter S. Beagle, The Last Unicorn
(Love is the puzzle that) can’t be solved. Catlike, it follows no rules but its own, and only it knows what they are. Also it can change the rules any time it wants, in any way it wants, and there’s nothing anyone can do about it.
— Chris Dee, Cat-Tales Book 5
I explained it loudand clear. What part of "meow"don't you understand?
— Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku
I haven't got anything against cats. I haven't got anything against elk either, but that doesn't mean I'm going to keep one in the store so I'll have a place to hang my hat.
— Lawrence Block, The Burglar Who Traded Ted Williams
There are those who have suggested that the tendency of a cat to play with its prey is a merciful one...
— Neil Gaiman, Coraline
Most people, when they move, well they just move depending on whatever's around them. At this very moment, as I am writing, Constitution the cat is going by with her tummy dragging close to the floor. This cat has absolutely nothing constructive to do in life and still she is heading toward something, probably an armchair.
— Muriel Barbery, The Elegance of the Hedgehog
A woman hath nine lives like a cat.
— John B. Heywood, The Proverbs of John Heywood. Being the "Proverbes" of That Author Printed 1546
Cats ask plainly for what they want.
— Walter Savage Landor, Imaginary Conversations
Sekhmet crawled onto Ramses's lap and began to purr. 'The creature oozes like a furry slug,' said Ramses, eyeing it without favor.
— Elizabeth Peters, Seeing a Large Cat
What would you do if your cat suddenly went psycho and started to attack you for no apparent reason, lying in wait and pouncing or stalking you with a faraway look reminiscent of its predatory cousins and ancestors?
— Nicholas Dodman
Cats may walk by themselves, but there are times when they need our support.
— Nicholas Dodman
Cats are true carnivores. While you may choose a vegetarian lifestyle, don't assume it's healthier for your cat also. Cats aren't able to convert beta-carotene into vitamin A the way we can. They must get vitamin A from animal tissue (called preformed A). Cats are also unable to convert linoleic acid (an essential fatty acid) to arachidonic acid the way dogs can so they must get preformed arachidonic acid from its only source—animal tissue.
— Pam Johnson-Bennett, Twisted Whiskers: Solving Your Cat's Behavior Problems
Some of them stole off to those cryptical realms which are known only to cats and which villagers say are on the moon's dark side, whither the cats leap from tall housetops; but one small black kitten crept upstairs and sprang in Carter's lap to purr and play, and curled up near his feet when he lay down at last on the little couch whose pillows were stuffed with fragrant drowsy herbs.
— H.P. Lovecraft, The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath
Japanese goldfish,With your gossamer tail,You are the loveliest creatureI have ever seen.""Japanese kitten,Put your tongue back in where it belongsAnd go away.I know exactly what you are thinking.
— Paul Gallico, Honorable Cat
Evidence indicates that cats were first tamed in Egypt. The Egyptians stored grain, which attracted rodents, which attracted cats. (No evidence that such a thing happened with the Mayans, though a number of wild cats are native to the area.) I don't think this is accurate. It is certainly not the whole story. Cats didn't start as mousers. Weasels and snakes and dogs are more efficient as rodent-control agents. I postulate that cats started as psychic companions, as Familiars, and have never deviated from this function.
— William S. Burroughs, The Cat Inside
When the tea is brought at five o'clockAnd all the neat curtains are drawn with care,The little black cat with bright green eyesIs suddenly purring there.
— Harold Monro, Collected Poems
In my head, the sky is blue, the grass is green and cats are orange.
— Jim Davis, In Dog Years I'd be Dead: Garfield at 25
I hope people don't take kittens on a whim, like they would a toy, then not care for them.
— Shirley Rousseau Murphy, Cat on the Money
Sakaki: "...Why can't we just talk it over...?"Tomo: "You can't talk to cats.
— Kiyohiko Azuma, Azumanga Daioh: The Omnibus
...I regard cats as one of the great joys in the world. I see them as a gift of highest order.
— Trisha McCagh
I situate myself, and seat myself,And where you recline I shall recline,For every armchair belonging to you as good as belongs to me.I loaf and curl up my tailI yawn and loaf at my ease after rolling in the catnip p
— Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse
Cats have gnosis to a degree that is granted to few bishops.
— Carl Van Vechten, The Tiger in the House: A Cultural History of the Cat
And indeed there will be timeTo wonder, 'Do I shed?' and, 'Do I shed?'Time to turn back and stretch out on the bed,And give myself a bath before I'm fed --(They will say: 'It's the short-haired ones I prefer.')My flea collar buckled neatly in my fur,My expression cool and distant but softened by a gentle purr --(They will say: 'I'm allergic to his fur!')Do I dareJump up on the table?In an instant there is timeFor excursions and inversions that will make me seem unst
— Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse
Are you an aberration to your species?' she cried. 'Cats don't look for approval!
— Gregory Maguire, A Lion Among Men
No valentines from the cats again.
— Lynne Truss, Making the Cat Laugh
He was massive, a veritable Arnold Schwarzenegger of a cat, with a wide, handsome face and a proud, lionish expression.
— Nicholas Dodman
The urge to change my mind and not go at all is enormous. I’m absolutely terrified to leave on that boat. But, if I don’t go, there’ll be one more broken person in this world who gave up a dream to sit in a chair, pick up the TV remote and shrink.
— Lexis De Rothschild
Yawn. String-on-a-stick. Fine. I'll come out and chase itto make you happy.
— Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku
Are there any capitalist cats?" Nakata asked
— Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore
The cat's asleep; I whisper "kitten"Till he stirs a little and begins to purr--He doesn't wake. Today out on the limb(The limb he thinks he can't climb down from)He mewed until I heard him in the house.I climbed up to get him down: he mewed.What he says and what he sees are limited.My own response is even more constricted.I think, "It's lucky; what you have is too."What do you have except--well, me?I joke about it but it's not a joke;The house and I are all he remembers.Next month how will he guess that it is winterAnd not just entropy, the universePlunging at last into its cold decline?I cannot think of him without a pang.Poor rumpled thing, why don't you seeThat you have no more, really, than a man?Men aren't happy; why are you?
— Randall Jarrell, The Complete Poems
The trees around and overhead were so thick that it was always dry inside and on Sunday morning I lay there with Jonas, listening to his stories. All cat stories start with the statement: 'My mother, who was the first cat, told me this,' and I lay with my head close to Jonas and listened.
— Shirley Jackson, We Have Always Lived in the Castle
The cat does not offer services. The cat offers itself.
— William S. Burroughs, The Cat Inside
With Cats, some say, one rule is true:Don’t speak till you are spoken to.Myself, I do not hold with that —I say, you should ad-dress a Cat.But always keep in mind that heResents familiarity.I bow, and taking off my hat,Ad-dress him in this form: O Cat!But if he is the Cat next door,Whom I have often met before(He comes to see me in my flat)I greet him with an oopsa Cat!I think I've heard them call him James —But we've not got so far as names.
— T.S. Eliot, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats
Sunday, January 27, 1884. -- There was another story in the paper a week or so since. A gentleman had a favourite cat whom he taught to sit at the dinner table where it behaved very well. He was in the habit of putting any scraps he left onto the cat's plate. One day puss did not take his place punctually, but presently appeared with two mice, one of which it placed on its master's plate, the other on its own.
— Beatrix Potter, Beatrix Potter's Journal
Gus is the Cat at the Theatre Door.His name, as I ought to have told you before,Is really Asparagus. That's such a fussTo pronounce, that we usually call him just Gus.His coat's very shabby, he's thin as a rake,And he suffers from palsy that makes his paw shake.Yet he was, in his youth, quite the smartest of Cats —But no longer a terror to mice or to rats.For he isn't the Cat that he was in his prime;Though his name was quite famous, he says, in his time.And whenever he joins his friends at their club(which takes place at the back of the neighbouring pub)He loves to regale them, if someone else pays,With anecdotes drawn from his palmiest days.For he once was a Star of the highest degree —He has acted with Irving, he's acted with Tree.And he likes to relate his success on the Halls,Where the Gallery once gave him seven cat-calls.But his grandest creation, as he loves to tell,Was Firefrorefiddle, the Fiend of the Fell.
— T.S. Eliot, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats
He's outwardly respectable. (They say he cheats at cards.)And his footprints are not found in any file of Scotland Yard's.And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled,Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled,Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair -Ay, there's the wonder of the thing! Macavity's not there!And when the Foreign Office find a Treaty's gone astray,Or the Admiralty lose some plans and drawings by the way,There may be a scrap of paper in the hall or on the stair -But it's useless to investigate - Mcavity's not there!And when the loss has been disclosed, the Secret Service say:'It must have been Macavity!' - but he's a mile away.You'll be sure to find him resting, or a-licking of his thumbs,Or engaged in doing complicated long-division sums.Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,There never was a Cat of such deceitfulness and suavity.He always has an alibi, and one or two to spaer:At whatever time the deed took place - MACAVITY WASN'T THERE!And they say that all the Cats whose wicked deeds are widely known(I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone)Are nothing more than agents for the Cat who all the timeJust controls their operations: the Napoleon of Crime!
— T.S. Eliot, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats
Once [a cat] has given its love, what absolute confidence, what fidelity of affection! It will make itself the companion of your hours of work, of loneliness, or of sadness. It will lie the whole evening on your knee, purring and happy in your society, and leaving the company of creatures of its own society to be with you.
— Théophile Gautier, Ménagerie intime
It is a difficult matter to gain the affection of a cat. He is a philosophical, methodical animal, tenacious of his own habits, fond of order and neatness, and disinclined to extravagant sentiment. He will be your friend, if he finds you worthy of friendship, but not your slave.
— Théophile Gautier, Ménagerie intime
Cat: a pygmy lion who loves mice, hates dogs, and patronizes human beings.
— Oliver Herford
If a fish is the movement of water embodied, given shape, then cat is a diagram and pattern of suble air.
— Doris Lessing, On Cats
Behold the day-break!I awaken you by sitting on your chest and purring in your face,I stir you with muscular paw-prods, I rouse you with toe-
— Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse
Letmeoutletmeoutletmeoutletmeout.Wait--let me back in!...Letmeinletmeinletmeinletmein.Wait--let me back out!
— Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku
Ah, fish, there is no fareQuite like a flounder! They surely will not missA piece or two from stacks of sole like this;I'll steal a few, but leave the lion's share.Look! the lamplight on the lane is prettyThey're back from walking out on Dover Beach.I think I'll hide and spare myselpf the speech,For we are in a world untouched by pityWhere ignorant humans curse the k
— Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse
And there are my cats, engaged in a ritual that goes back thousands of years, tranquilly licking themselves after the meal. Practical animals, they prefer to have others provide the food ... some of them do. There must have been a split between the cats who accepted domestication and those who did not.
— William S. Burroughs, The Cat Inside
You can never know where I am or what I am,But I am good company to you nonetheless,And really do regret I broke your ink
— Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse
Your tummy, soft aswarm dough. I knead and knead, thenbake it with a nap.
— Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku
If you can try to nap where someone's sitting,Although there is another empty chair,Then rub against his ankle without quittingUntil he rises from your favorite lair;If you can whine and whimper by a portalUntil the bolted door is opened wide,Then howl as if you've got a wound that's mortalUntil he comes and lets you back inside;If you can give a guest a nasty spiking,But purr when you are petted by a thief;If you can find the food not to your likingBecause they put some cheese in with the beef;If you can leave no proffered hand unbitten,And pay no heed to any rule or ban,then all will say you are a Cat, my kitten.And -- which is more -- you'll make a fool of Man!
— Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse
Dogs have hair. Cats, fur.Dogs whine, yip, howl, bark. Cats purrr.I say: No contest.
— Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku
The white saucer like some full moon descendsAt last from the clouds of the table above;She sighs and dreams and thrills and glows,Transfigured with love.She nestles over the shining rim,Buries her chin in the creamy sea;Her tail hangs loose; each drowsy pawIs doubled under each bending knee.A long, dim ecstasy holds her life;Her world is an infinite shapeless white,Till her tongue has curled the last holy drop,Then she sinks back into the night,Draws and dips her body to heapHer sleepy nerves in the great arm-chair,Lies defeated and buried deepThree or four hours unconscious there.
— Harold Monro, Collected Poems
The noisy jay swoops by and reviles me, he complains of my meow and my malingering.I too am not a bit subdued, I too am uncontrollable,I sound my splenetic yowl over the roof of the h
— Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse
There is a kidney-shaped fish pool outside the picture window. I cleaned it out and put in some large goldfish I bought in a bait store. The cats are always trying to catch the fish, with no success. One time the white cat leapt for a frog across the pool. The frog dove in and the cat fell in. He is trouble-prone.
— William S. Burroughs, The Cat Inside
Fine. If you insist.I'll try Just.One.Nibble. But--I won't enjoy it.
— Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku
The gym cat appears to those who will die. He is our totem." This thought came to me a few weeks ago. I shared it with no one of course.
— Joyce Carol Oates, Dear Husband
As if on cue, a line of silhouettes emerged from behind a desert scrub—shapes that moved like cats. They wandered through the landscape of corpses, touching each with a gentle nudge. They grew closer, and it became clear that Chuluum was leading the other cats on their sorrowful homage, giving the fallen librarians the honor they deserved.
— Rahma Krambo, Guardian Cats and the Lost Books of Alexandria
Confront a child, a puppy, and a kitten with a sudden danger; the child will turn instinctively for assistance, the puppy will grovel in abject submission, the kitten will brace its tiny body for a frantic resistance.
— Saki
Not fooling around, not bothering nobody, just sitting here mending the Primus," said the cat with a hostile frown, "and, moreover, I consider it my duty to warn you that the cat is an ancient, inviolable animal.
— Mikhail Bulgakov, The Master and Margarita
...if you've never been cussed out by a Siamese, you don't know what profanity is all about!
— Lilian Jackson Braun, The Cat Who Saw Red
Marco could not have known about the mystical effect of a full moon on cats and books left on their own in the library. Not until he saw the lines breathe, the words unveiled.
— Rahma Krambo, Guardian Cats and the Lost Books of Alexandria
The dog appeals to cheap and facile emotions; the cat to the deepest founts of imagination and cosmic perception in the human mind. It is no accident that the contemplative Egyptians, together with such later poetic spirits as Poe, Gautier, Baudelaire, and Swinburne, were all sincere worshippers of the supple grimalkin.
— H.P. Lovecraft, Cats and Dogs
Elf made his way fuzzily back to the drawer, trying to think nasty thoughts about his tormentor (Mungo the dog) but he couldn't, as he was too little and his mind was formless and without messages.( "Elf" the tiny kitten Mungo tormented )
— Martha Grimes, The Black Cat
Would you buy potato chips that listed potato by-product or potato digest as an ingredient
— Michelle T. Bernard
If human lives be,for their very brevity, sweet,then beast lives are sweeter still...
— Isobelle Carmody, Night Gate
People happily kill other people in the name of everything from a god to a country to an overly developed sense of annoyance when someone cuts across two lanes on a freeway without signaling. Cats will, on occasion, kill other cats but for the most part they are content to puff up their furr, yowl like banshees, and rip the occassional ear off - and all this is usually done for the sake of food or protecting their own territory (which may not be condonable but it is at least rational) .
— Peter Gethers, A Cat Abroad
I've found that he way a person feels about cats-and the way they feel about him or her in return-is usually an excellent gauge by which to measure a person's character
— P.C. Cast
It is common knowledge that 87% of the problems of the world are caused by cats. No cats, no problems."Hank the Cowdog
— John Erickson, The Case of the Secret Weapon
I am sad for the dead and I am sad for the livingbut not for my 5 cats
— Charles Bukowski, You Get So Alone at Times That it Just Makes Sense
Most cats don't like water, and despite her pretensions of tigerhood, Julie was no different. Yes, tigers have stripes; so do tabbies. If you want to know the difference, try tossing one of each into your swimming pool. Then I would recommend running.
— Seanan McGuire, Rosemary and Rue
I love cats, they're great; intelligent, affectionate, lovable, and this one was particularly nice, so picking it up and giving it a few slaps and a bit of a rough time was galling, even though it was unfortunately necessary. See, if you're hiding in someone's spare bedroom waiting for them to turn in for the night, the last thing you need is a cat meowing at the door trying to get in to see you because you've been stroking it all day. A bit of a shake and a growl in the cat's face and that's all that's usually needed for it to give the spare room and the horrible bastard inside a wide berth for the rest of the night.
— Danny King, The Hitman Diaries
One can imagine that if humanity suddenly disappeared from the planet, the cat would shrug its shoulders, raise its tail, and return to its forest habitat, there to live as its ancestors have done for two million years, forever in search of something small, furry, and squeaky to play with.
— Eric Chaline
My darling, what a cat they have! Something perfectly stupendous. Siamese, in colour dark beige, or taupe, with chocolate paws and the tail the same. Moreover, his tail is comparatively short, so his croup has something of a little dog, or rather, a kangaroo, and that’s its colour, too. And that special silkiness of short fur, and some very tender white tints on its folds, and wonderful clear-blue eyes, turning transparently green towards evening, and a pensive tenderness of its walk, a sort of heavenly circumspection of movement. An amazing, sacred animal, and so quiet – it’s unclear what he is looking at with those eyes filled to the brim with sapphire water.
— Vladimir Nabokov
Cats, Dog considered, were clearly a lot tougher than lost souls.
— Terry Pratchett, Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch
One grey cloak is much like another, just as all cats are grey in the dark.
— Andrew  Taylor, The Ashes of London
The Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat:If you offer him pheasant he would rather have grouse.If you put him in a house he would much prefer a flat,If you put him in a flat then he'd rather have a house.If you set him on a mouse then he only wants a rat,If you set him on a rat then he'd rather chase a mouse.Yes the Rum Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat -And there isn't any call for me to shout it:For he will doAs he do doAnd there's no doing anything about it!
— T.S. Eliot, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats
He is quiet and small, he is blackFrom his ears to the tip of his tail;He can creep through the tiniest crackHe can walk on the narrowest rail.He can pick any card from a pack,He is equally cunning with dice;He is always deceiving you into believingThat he's only hunting for mice.He can play any trick with a corkOr a spoon and a bit of fish-paste;If you look for a knife or a forkAnd you think it is merely misplaced -You have seen it one moment, and then it is gawn!But you'll find it next week lying out on the lawn.And we all say: OH!Well I never!Was there everA Cat so cleverAs Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
— T.S. Eliot, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats
A cat is only technically an animal, being divine.
— Robert Lynd
Looking back few friends had webut I've got him and he's got me.And when the golden minute comeswhen we no longer wake to smellthe river where the wild swans sailedthe orchard where the blossoms fell,we'll smile a little thinkin' of that.Me in my shirt-tails, him with his whiskersme and the cat.
— Rod McKuen
May 4, 1985. I am packing for a short trip to New York to discuss the cat book with Brion. In the front room where the kittens are kept, Calico Jane is nursing one black kitten. I pick up my Tourister. It seems heavy. I look inside and there are her other four kittens."Take care of my babies. Take them with you wherever you go.
— William S. Burroughs, The Cat Inside
I sometimes think the Pussy-Willows greyAre Angel Kittens who have lost their way,And every Bulrush on the river bankA Cat-Tail from some lovely Cat astray.
— Oliver Herford, The Rubáiyát of a Persian Kitten
Sometimes I like her calm, unwild, gentle as a sleeping child,and wonder as she lies, a fur ring,curled upon my lap, unstirring -- is it me or Tibbles purring?
— Ian Serraillier
A cat knows how to be comfortable, how to get the people around it to serve it. In a tranquil domestic situation, the cat is a veritable manipulative genius. It seeks the soft, it seeks the warm, it prefers the quiet and it loves to be full. It displays, when it gets its own way in these matters, a degree of contentment we would all like to emulate.
— Roger A. Caras, A Celebration Of Cats
Bustopher Jones is not skin and bones — In fact, he's remarkably fat.He doesn't haunt pubs — he has eight or nine clubs,For he's the St. James's Street Cat!He's the Cat we all greet as he walks down the streetIn his coat of fastidious black:No commonplace mousers have such well-cut trousersOr such an impeccable back.In the whole of St. James's the smartest of names isThe name of this Brummell of Cats;And we're all of us proud to be nodded or bowed toBy Bustopher Jones in white spats!
— T.S. Eliot, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats
Cats, no less liquid than their shadows,Offer no angles to the wind.They slip, diminished, neat, through loopholesLess than themselves.
— A.S.J. Tessimond, Collected Poems: with Translations from Jacques Prévert
At evening when the lamp is lit,The tired Human People sitAnd doze, or turn with solemn looksThe speckled pages of their books.Then I, the Dangerous Kitten, prowlAnd in the Shadows softly growl,And roam about the farthest floorWhere Kitten never trod before.And, crouching in the jungle damp,I watch the Human Hunter’s camp,Ready to spring with fearful roarAs soon as I shall hear them snore.And then with stealthy tread I crawlInto the dark and trackless hall,Where 'neath the Hat-tree's shadows deepUmbrellas fold their wings and sleep.A cuckoo calls — and to their densThe People climb like frightened hens,And I'm alone — and no one caresIn Darkest Africa — downstairs.
— Oliver Herford, The Kitten's Garden of Verses
When I grow up I mean to beA Lion large and fierce to see.I'll mew so loud that Cook in fright Will give me all the cream in sight.And anyone who dares to say'Poor Puss' to me will rue the day.Then having swallowed him I'll creepInto the Guest Room Bed to sleep.
— Oliver Herford, The Kitten's Garden of Verses
In the morning, when she wishes me to wake, she crouches on my chest, and pats my face with her paw. Or, if I am on my side, she crouches looking into my face. Soft, soft touches of her paw. I open my eyes, say I don't want to wake. I close my eyes. Cat gently pats my eyelids. Cat licks my nose. Cat starts purring, two inches from my face. Cat, then, as I lie pretending to be asleep, delicately bites my nose. I laugh and sit up. At which she bounds off my bed and streaks downstairs -- to have the back door opened if it is winter, to be fed, if it is summer.
— Doris Lessing, On Cats
Her ears, lightly fringed with white that looked silver, lifted and moved, back, forward, listening and sensing. Her face turned, slightly, after each new sensation, alert. Her tail moved, in another dimension, as if its tip was catching messages her other organs could not. She sat poised, air-light, looking, hearing, feeling, smelling, breathing, with all of her, fur, whiskers, ears -- everything, in delicate vibration.
— Doris Lessing, On Cats
The only purpose of cats is that they constitute mobile decorative objects, a concept which I find intellectually interesting, but unfortunately our cats have such drooping bellies that this does not apply to them.
— Muriel Barbery, The Elegance of the Hedgehog
Sorry about thesquishy in your shoe. Must'vebeen something I ate.
— Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku
One upside of the heat. Kind of cool to see a cat pant.
— Jonah Goldberg
What do you mean "Ewww"?How is my tuna breath worsethan peanut butter?
— Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku
John Grady looked at the table. The paper cat stepped thin and slant among the shapes of cats thereon. He looked up again. Yessir, he said. Just me and him.
— Cormac McCarthy, All the Pretty Horses
It takes me a while to drag him out, he's got himself stuck to the axle, and by the time I am done and stand over the body something strange has started to happen. The alley's filled with a half-dozen cats, runty little things with their ribs showing and their tails worn high like they're pointing to the moon. I stand there, breathing froth into the snowflakes and watch them gather round me, soft kitty paws, and now and then a patrol car rolls past in the distance. The cats are circling us, tails cocked at the moon, their muzzles bloodied by the tail lights' glow. They are vicious bastards, let me tell you: frost on their whiskers, eyes like cut glass, a half-dozen pairs, on me and the dead man. And then they start licking. Licking at the snow I mean, the blood in the snow, they lap it up like mother's milk. And all the while from their throats, from their whole bodies, there issues this sound, you hear it with your skin, it's like an engine running under your palm. That's when I realize they are purring, man, purring as they feed on the midget's death.
— Dan Vyleta, Pavel & I
He's better now, Loo. He's taking care of the cats.
— C. JoyBell C., Saint Paul Trois Chateaux: 1948
Pluto was a well-known fixture in Bad Münstereifel, at least among those who lived in the old part of town. A large, foul-tempered, and unsterilized inky-black tomcat, he had once made it onto the front page of the local free paper (admittedly during a quiet week as regards other news) after a resident of the town accused him of making an unprovoked attack on her pet dachshund.
— Helen Grant, The Vanishing of Katharina Linden
I always imagined that cats were the Paris Hiltons of the pet world: They didn't quite deserve all the attention but they got it anyway.
— Sarah Andersen, Big Mushy Happy Lump
that's what i mean about cats. they're always trying to make fools of us humans.
— Lilian Jackson Braun, The Private Life of the Cat Who...
She drowned all of the catnip mice in Nike's water bowl and I had to take them away after he began drinking the resulting 'nip tea, wearing overalls, and changing all the songs in my favorites playlist to the Grateful Dead.
— Amy Petrie Shaw, The Tao of the Dippy Cat: A Series of Uncomfortable Incidents and Horrible Happenings
The man who will not defend the honour of his cat cannot be trusted to defend anything.
— Robert Lynd, The Pleasures of Ignorance
You know that feeling you get, when the sky has turned green, air raid sirens are blowing, the theme to the "Wizard of Oz" wafts softly through the air, your neighbor has just blown by backwards on her bicycle, and an ominous funnel cloud is hovering on the horizon?Yeah, that feeling. the one that says that says "A picnic! That's what I need to do right about now! What could possible go wrong?
— Amy Petrie Shaw, The Tao of the Dippy Cat: A Series of Uncomfortable Incidents and Horrible Happenings
The love of one cat simply can't be compared with the love of another..
— Will Advise
Little known fact- a cat which has just bitten itself in the ass can achieve impressive speed at it dashes madly straight up a curtain.
— Amy Petrie Shaw, The Tao of the Dippy Cat: A Series of Uncomfortable Incidents and Horrible Happenings
I am forever yearning for ice cream.And cats. Lots and lots of cats.
— Noor Ashour
I signed off with Ricky, and I was putting away my phone when TC slunk past, heading for his spot in the front window."Hey, cat," I said. "We're bringing home a friend for you. A doggie big enough to devour you in a single gulp. Is that okay?"He turned a baleful stare on me, as if he understood. I'm convinced TC isn't just a cat, no more than Lloergan is just a dog. Maybe someday, when I'm moments from perishing at the hands of an intruder, TC will save me in a sudden and awe-inspiring display of supernatural power. Or maybe he'll decide I haven't given him enough tuna that week and leave me to my fate. He's a cat, so I figure my chances are about fifty-fifty.
— Kelley Armstrong, Rituals
No threatening the cat!" Mr. Snuggly said.
— Charlaine Harris, Midnight Crossroad
There is a certain concentrated, avid-for-blood look that appears on the faces of reporters on the trail of a very big story that you'd have to visit the big cat house at the zoo to see duplicated in its primal state. From the look on Brenda's face, if a tiger was standing between her and this story right now, the cat would soon have a tall-journalist-sized hole in him.
— John Varley, Steel Beach
There are always cats around Charlie's, but they are usually refugees seeking asylum from the local rat population, and rather desperately friendly.
— Robin McKinley, Sunshine
Being called "dangerous" by a cat could mean a great many things, but it was generally delivered as something of a compliment.
— Jim Butcher, The Aeronaut's Windlass
It was why no sane cat allowed kits to come anywhere near human beings. Humans seemed to feel that it was perfectly acceptable to teach kits to accept food from their hands as a matter of course, rather than teaching them the importance of hunting skill and self-reliance.
— Jim Butcher, The Aeronaut's Windlass
I fall short of her standards. She made me buy cat food that hasn't been tested on animals. My cats took one bite of it, spit it out, and yelled, "Did no one test this?
— Paula Poundstone, The Totally Unscientific Study of the Search for Human Happiness
When you're fighting a crowd, it's good to shout potentially threatening things like "Crossbows!" or "Fire!" or "Giant Flying Cat!" every once in a while.
— Sebastien de Castell, Traitor's Blade
Take it from catsIf someone moves to make room for you, take up more room. If someone is looking over there, there’s something to see. If somebody sneezes, run. If someone brings a bag into your home, look inside it. If you don’t want someone to leave, sit on his suitcase. Clean between your toes. Flaunt your full figure. Hide loose change. Even though you can take care of yourself, it’s okay to let someone be nice to you. It’s fine to take a nap on the laundry. If you stand in a kitchen long enough, someone will feed you. If you’re alone in bed, use all the pillows. Just because it’s gorgeous outside doesn’t mean you have to go outside. Just because you can fit into something tight doesn’t mean that you belong in it. If you trust someone, open yourself like a cheap umbrella. If you want to be left alone, park yourself in a closet. If you want to surprise someone, lie in a bathtub and then jerk back the curtain when he sits on the toilet. If you’re not interested, don’t look interested. You don’t have to chase every bird that you see.
— Helen Ellis, American Housewife
God I have been - God I am. But quite frankly, sometimes it is all just a little too much for one small cat.
— Paul Gallico, Thomasina
You also yell at the pigeons outside, watch too many cooking shows, and have a blog entirely dedicated to pictures of yourself.
— Marie Jacquelyn, Puss in Prada
It is easy to make plans in this world
—  even a cat can do it
The cat required far less attendance than a human child, which is one of the reasons why spinster ladies prefer felines to babies.
— Elizabeth Peters, The Mummy Case
It is said that in Ulthar, which lies beyond the river Skai, no man may kill a cat; and this I can verily believe as I gaze upon him who sitteth purring before the fire. For the cat is cryptic, and close to strange things which men cannot see. He is the soul of antique Aegyptus, and bearer of tales from forgotten cities in Meroë and Ophir. He is the kin of the jungle’s lords, and heir to the secrets of hoary and sinister Africa. The Sphinx is his cousin, and he speaks her language; but he is more ancient than the Sphinx, and remembers that which she hath forgotten.
— H.P. Lovecraft, The Cats of Ulthar
Some people scorn a cat and think it not an essential
—  but the Clemens tribe are not of these.
There was a sort of gallery structure in the roof space which held a bed and also a bathroom which you could actually swing a cat in. But only if it was a reasonably patient cat and didn’t mind a few nasty cracks about the head.
— Douglas Adams, So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish
I'm a cat. You know cat's don't like to go outside. They actually drop their smell all over a place, and that becomes their place. So when you live with a cat, you actually live at the cat's house.
— Carla Bruni-Sarkozy
Once a cat loves you, it loves you till the end.
— Will Advise
There are many intelligent beings in the Universe. Most of them are owned by cats.
— Old Polish Proverb
Randall, the gay alcoholic in the house next door, boldly peeps through my windows. 'Boy, you sure rock in that chair a lot,' he said last week, his face pressed against my screen.  This time I was lying on my bed with Katherine's cats. I'm watching them while she's out of town. I can be very mushy, and he watched me kissing them and saying that all the other cats in the neighborhood were jealous of their beauty.
— David Sedaris, Theft by Finding: Diaries 1977-2002
A cat is basically a great egomaniac who keeps the human company as long as it pleases itself.
— M.Z.Riffi
Er, excuse me,' said the man as Nanny Ogg turned away, 'but what is that on your shoulders?''It's. . . a fur collar,' said Nanny.'Excuse me, but I just saw it flick its tail.''Yes. I happen to believe in beauty without cruelty.
— Terry Pratchett
Nell was like a witch. Her long silvery hair rolled into a bun on the back of her head, the narrow wooden house on the hillside in Paddington, with its peeling lemon-yellow paint and overgrown garden, the neighborhood cats that followed her everywhere. The way she had of fixing her eyes so straight on you, as if she might be about to cast a spell.
— Kate Morton, The Forgotten Garden
Every cat knows how to keep his owner feeding them: You may scratch and bite ninety-nine times, but the hundredth time, you must leap into a lap and press your nose to their nose. Rules are for dogs.
— Catherynne M. Valente, The Girl Who Raced Fairyland All the Way Home
Cat herding is simple. Just drag a string behind you.
— Aaron Dennis
As we all know, the spine ridges of adult cats are highly poisonous. If you are coming to see a kitten that you have adopted, it is important that you check for the location and severity of the spine ridge before attempting any petting. Also, keep your hands away from their mouths. A few of them have developed their venom sacks. We lost two cat adopters already this month, so...let's just be careful people.
— Joseph Fink, The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe
Who shall tell the lady's griefWhen her Cat was past relief?Who shall number the hot tearsShed o'er her, beloved for years?Who shall say the dark dismayWhich her dying caused that day?
— Christina Rossetti
For there is nothing sweeter than his peace when at rest.For there is nothing brisker than his life when in motion.
— Christopher Smart, Jubilate Agno
You idiot!" She spat, flattening her ears. "What are you doing in my territory?""Drowning?" Replied Graystripe. "Can't you do that in your own territory?" "Ah, but who would rescue me there?
— Erin Hunter, Fire and Ice
We lost track of which was which, but we were fairly sure that some of the creatures had been borne away still in the darkness of paganism, and that worried us a good deal.
— Marilynne Robinson, Gilead
You have a cat and go on vacation, you know who to call. Though, I warn you, I do both dry and wet food. I’m not into doin’ just wet or just dry. They need a treat, but they need to keep their teeth clean. It’s important.”-TexRock Chick
— Kristen Ashley, Rock Chick
Lardo was getting on in years, and his big belly tended to slow him down a bit.
— Sarah Weeks, Pie
The domestic cat is a bit of a contradiction. It freely accepts human friendship while never allowing even the most contented life to dim its sense of who it is and what it is capable of.
— Ellen Dugan, The Enchanted Cat: Feline Fascinations, Spells & Magick
Everyone has noticed the taste which cats have for pausing and lounging between the two leaves of a half-shut door. Who is there who has not said to a cat, “Do come in!” There are men who, when an incident stands half-open before them, have the same tendency to halt in indecision between two resolutions, at the risk of getting crushed through the abrupt closing of the adventure by fate. The over-prudent, cats as they are, and because they are cats, sometimes incur more danger than the audacious.
— Victor Hugo, Les Misérables
As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat.
— Ellen P. Berkeley
The mathematical probability of a common cat doing exactly as it pleases is the one scientific absolute in the world.
— Lynn M. Osband
Cats are absolute individuals, with their own ideas about everything, including the people they own.
— John Dingman
Tramps and vagabonds have marks they make on gateposts and trees and doors, letting others of their kind know a little about the people who live at the houses and farms they pass on their travels. I think cats must leave similar signs; how else to explain the cats who turn up at our door through the year, hungry and flea-ridden and abandoned?
— Neil Gaiman, M Is for Magic
We're cleaning cat ears.Rhonda doesn't require us to come in on Sundays, but somebody has to feed the animals. Yesterday Alex and I helped five cats and two dogs find homes...We agreed we probably could have placed a couple more cats if their ears were nice and pink inside like in the wet-food commercials. We told Rhonda to take a much-deserved break today and we'd come in, feed everybody, and make our cats a little more like the ones on TV.So I skipped church to clean cat ears.
— Mindy McGinnis, The Female of the Species
Today 5:14 p.m."Mrrrrrowl. Mrrrrrowl.""Ow! Ow, stupid cat! Ahem. You told me, 'stop calling, Isabelle,' but I'm not the one calling you. Church is calling you. Mine are merely the fingers that work the phone."See, here's something you may not have known before you committed your recent rash acts. Our cat, Church, and your cat, Chairman Meow? They're in love. I've never seen such love before. I never knew such love could exist in the heart of a... cat. Some people say that love between two dude cats is wrong, but I think it's beautiful. Love makes Church happier than I've ever seen him. Nothing makes him happy like Chairman Meow. Not tuna. Not shredding centuries-old tapestries. Nothing. Please don't keep these cats apart. Please don't take the joy of love away from Church."Look, this is really just a warning for your own good. If you keep Church and Chairman Meow apart, Church will start to get angry."You wouldn't like Church when he's angry."Beep
— Cassandra Clare, The Bane Chronicles
Having a bunch of cats around is good. If you're feeling bad, just look at the cats, you'll feel better, because they know that everything is, just as it is.
— Charles Bukowski, On Cats
Rowl felt sure that Bridget's fragile feelings would be crushed if he denied her the pleasure of sharing her meat with him.
— Jim Butcher, The Aeronaut's Windlass
By associating with the cat, one only risks becoming richer.
— Colette
Cats never weep, she told herself, no more than wolves. It's just a stupid dream.
— George R.R. Martin, A Feast for Crows
You can flip a coin but Schrodinger's pet cat will still be in that box.
— Scott Edward Shjefte
That's the way with a cat, you know -- any cat; they don't give a damn for discipline. And they can't help it, they're made so. But it ain't really insubordination, when you come to look at it right and fair -- it's a word that don't apply to a cat. A cat ain't ever anybody's slave or serf or servant, and can't be -- it ain't in him to be. And so, he don't have to obey anybody. He is the only creature in heaven or earth or anywhere that don't have to obey somebody or other, including the angels. It sets him above the whole ruck, it puts him in a class by himself. He is independent. You understand the size of it? He is the only independent person there is. In heaven or anywhere else. There's always somebody a king has to obey -- a trollop, or a priest, or a ring, or a nation, or a deity or what not -- but it ain't so with a cat. A cat ain't servant nor slave to anybody at all. He's got all the independence there is, in Heaven or anywhere else, there ain't any left over for anybody else. He's your friend, if you like, but that's the limit -- equal terms, too, be you king or be you cobbler; you can't play any I'm-better-than-you on a cat -- no, sir! Yes, he's your friend, if you like, but you got to treat him like a gentleman, there ain't any other terms. The minute you don't, he pulls freight.
— Mark Twain