num_pages: 224
description:  I want to bite you Heffa. I want to bite you very hard. I'll be gentle I promise. If you really loved me you'd let me. Heffa Lump is just a typical pale 17-year-old who doubts that anyone will ever see her true beauty and needs to grow up and get a life. Fortunately the Spatula Academy of Fictional Excellence specializes in helping characters from kids books cross over into adult fiction. Unfortunately shes distracted from her attempts to leave adolescence behind when she meets Teddy Kelledyan impossibly gorgeous boy who eats rare meat is super-strong and never goes out in daylight. Could he just maybe be a vampire? (Hint: totally.) Soon Heffa finds herself harassed by supernatural forces on all sides. Will she be able to narrate herself out of danger? Will Teddy learn that being with a girl doesn't always have to be about biting? And what will happen when the New Moan rises? A tale of first love painful longing and even more painful pointy teeth New Moan is a hilarious parody of the phenomenon that is Stephenie Meyer's Twilight saga.
language: English
title: New Moan: The Twishite Saga - A Parody
publisher: Michael O'Mara Books Ltd