Human Rights Violation Hearings — East London — 1996-04-17

BETH SAVAGE: The next moment I became conscious was actually in ICU, I was aware of my family and friends around me, and the most terrific experience to me in the intensive unit, was the fact that every evening as dusk fell, this man would appear at the window.  I initially thought it was a security guard and I couldn't communicate with my family, except through writing because obviously I had tubes everywhere, and I just used to write to them to please tell them to take the man away from the window.
 Eventually my eldest daughter was very clever and about EAST LONDON  HEARING TRC/EASTERN CAPE
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two weeks..  (end of side A of tape)
 (side B)  ....this face at the window, and this was the gentleman at the door with the AK 47, so that actually was a tremendous healing thing for me, because suddenly I'd found him and I knew who that hallucination was at ICU.
 I spent a month in ICU, it was quite traumatic, I had to learn to walk again, I came home, my children were unbelievable, they used to fight over who is to bath me, who was to dress me, who was to feed me.  I don't know whether I could ever have made it without them.

JUNE CHRICHTON: Beth could you tell us a little bit about the injury that you sustained in this attack.

BETH SAVAGE: Yes,   had open heart surgery, I had a hole in the aorta and I actually stopped breathing, but through the work of Dr John Pennel, they managed to get me to live. And I also had half my large intestine removed.  I've got really very ugly scarring up the middle and I have a damaged thumb from the shrapnel. I've still got shrapnel in my body, but all that means is that all the bells ring when I go through the airport, that makes life exciting. And I have an injury on the knee, but all in all, what I must say, is through the trauma of it all, I honestly feel richer.  I think it's been a really enriching experience for me and a growing curve, and I think it's given me the ability to relate to other people who may be go through trauma.

JUNE CHRICHTON: Can I interrupt you there beth and just take you back to the hospital situation?  You must have been visited by police at that time, and perhaps other organisations. Could you tell us a little bit about who came to see you and what statements were taken?

BETH SAVAGE: Well nobody could really take a statement from EAST LONDON  HEARING TRC/EASTERN CAPE
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me because, you know, I wasn't capable, but while I was in hospital I was really quite touched that members of the ANC did come to visit me, just popped in to see how I was doing.  I thought that was very touching, and of course, Bloemfontein and really the whole world, sent out messages and in fact, I was quite spoiled.

JUNE CHRICHTON: When you spoke about these hallucinations that you were having, and I think that would be the term that we would use about the man you saw in the window, is that right.

BETH SAVAGE: Yes.

JUNE CHRICHTON: You say that it's taken nearly 3 years for that face to come into focus.

BETH SAVAGE: Yes.

BETH SAVAGE: Is it correct that you went to Cape Town for an identity parade.

BETH SAVAGE: Yes, I did go to Cape Town, I was flown up to Cape Town over a weekend, to an identity parade together with other victims from the St James Church massacre, and I really in the line-up wasn't able to identify anybody.

JUNE CHRICHTON: And so, when you saw the photograph in the paper you were saying that enabled you to finally put a face to the person who was throwing the grenade.

BETH SAVAGE: Yes.

JUNE CHRICHTON: How many people died in this incident, Beth?

BETH SAVAGE: Four, Rhoda and Ian Macdonald, and Gillian and David Davis.

JUNE CHRICHTON: Beth what are you actually feeling towards the perpetrators at this time?

BETH SAVAGE: It's a difficult question but I honestly feel
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that, there, but for the grace of God, go I.  I really don't know how I would have reacted if I had been in their situation. I know, that's about all I can say.

JUNE CHRICHTON: And if they were to seek amnesty, because I believe there are those who are allegedly now in custody, because of this particular act, if they were to apply for amnesty, how would you feel about that?

BETH SAVAGE: Well whatever must be must be. It really wouldn't worry me one way or the other.

JUNE CHRICHTON: It wouldn't worry you?

BETH SAVAGE: No.

JUNE CHRICHTON: Is there, and this is my last question to you, is there anything that you were hoping the Commission will do for you?

BETH SAVAGE: Really there's nothing in particular that I would like the Commission to do for me, I think it's fantastic that we're having the Commission, I think the idea of that speaking out causes healing, I think that really a wonderful idea.  The only major problem that I've actually had with my injuries is that I'm just unable to take out any insurance, it's less premiums that four times anybody else's.  You know that's the only hassle I've had, so then really, but I think it's been a wonderful idea and I really hope that healing comes to everybody.  You know there are people here who have had far worse problems that I could ever have.

JUNE CHRICHTON: Beth thank you very much.

DESMOND MPILO TUTU: Thank you, are there any questions?

PANEL MEMBER: Do you believe that that attack that happened that night was politically motivated?

BETH SAVAGE: Yes I do.
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PANEL MEMBER: Why do you say so?

BETH SAVAGE: Just by virtue of the fact that at that time there was so much bad feeling between black and white people. You know, what other reason could there ever have been for it?

PANEL MEMBER: Is it important for you to have the identity, if the Commission can assist you to do so, to find out, is it important for you to have the identity of the people who are responsible?

BETH SAVAGE: It's not important to me, but, and I've said this to many people, what I would really, really like is, I would like to meet that man that threw that grenade in a attitude of forgiveness and hope that he could forgive me too for whatever reason.  But I would very much like to meet them.

PANEL MEMBER: Thank you.

DR BORAINE: Beth you've mentioned something about your life before, and your life after, and they're very different, but the spirit seems to be the same. Just tell us a little bit more about your immediate family, I mean what's your daughter doing, your son is with you now. And also the impact on your own life in terms of your father, who seems to have influenced you enormously.