The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1844-04-30 00:00:00

VARIETIES.

" Shall I have your hand ?" said a New York exquisite
to a belle, as the dance was about commencing. " With
all my heart," was the soft response.
An editor in Michigan4wishes himself in the middle of
a pumpkin pie as big as Lake Superior, and obliged to eat
his way out.
The longest canal in the world extends from St. Pe-
tersburg to the frontiers of China, over a space of 4472
miles.

It has been computed that the elecampane produces
3,000 seeds, the sunflower 4,000, and the tobacco plant
40,320.

Never trust with a secret a married man who loves his
wife, for he wilt tell her—and she will tell her sister, and
her sister will tell every body.
JONATHAN OUTDONE--A writer in Fraser states that
there is a village in Bohemia, the name of which is only
pronounceable by sneezing three limes, and adding the
syllables ischki/

Religion is exalted reason, refined from the grosser
parts of it: it is both the foundation and crown of all vir-
tues; it is morality improved and raised to its height by
being carried nearer to heaven, the only place where per-
fection resides.

LEARNED DICTION.—A contemporary speaks of a
lady who astonished a party the other day by asking for
the loan of a diminutive argenteous truncated cone, con-
vex on its summit, and semiperforated with symmetrical
indentations, or, in other words, a thimble.—Quebec Gaz.
A TENDER ADIE v.—Sydney Smith is a factious fellow.
On Bishop Selwin leaving England for his diocese of Can-
nibals, in New Zealand, Sydney thok leaf of him with
tears in his eyes, and in. these terms :—" Good bye, Sel-
wyn ; I hope you will not disagree with the man that eats
you ? "

SOLUTION OF BONES IN SULPHURIC ACID FOR THE
PURPOSE OF MANURE.—This practice seems likely to be
attended with success. The Duke of Richmond tried one
acre of a farm of a light sandy soil with the sulphuric
acid, and obtained a heavier crop than from an acre ma-
nured by guano, and another by stable-yard dung. It
promises a great saving to farmers.

AMERICAN MERCY.—Jonathan's heart of dollars bas
somewhat relented. The white man sentenced to be
hanged in Louisiana for aiding the Quadroon slave in an
attempt to escape from bondage is not, it seems, to be
executed. He is only to be publicly whipped. Hence,
the American flag may retain its significant stripes.—
Punch.

THE SWALLOW.—Few birds surpass the swallow in the
rapidity of flight. It is calculated that he often skims the
air at the rate of a mile a minute, and that in the cou:se of
a year be does not fly less than eight the circumference
of our globe, which is more than 200,000 miles ; to do
this he must travel each day 600 miles, moving at the
velocity of 25 miles per hour, or at an average rate of
one mile a minute for twelve hours each day
year. through the

TEST OF MESMERISM.--A strong proof of the infallibi-
bility of this much-disputed science was adduced the other
evening at a lecture on the subject. A boy being asked
while in the mesmeric state, whether '• The income tax
would be discontinued after the third ear. as Sir R. Peel
had promised ?" replied " certainly
not ?" This, upon mentioned to the Premier, was declared to be the
strongest instance of clairvoyance that could be brought
forward in favour of the science,—Punch.
y