The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1848-10-17 00:00:00

Oct. 17, 1848.

t f tt r a turr.
VARIETIES.

INVITATION TO A FEVER.—He that tempts me to drink
beyond my measure, civilly invites me to a fever.
The Belfast Times states that at a recent horticultural
show in that town, the judges decided that a bundle of
white carrots were the best parsnips, and gave the prize
accordingly.
The following is a copy of a sign placed in the shop
Window of a barber, near to the police-office, Yorkshire-
street, Rochdale, viz. :—" Look out ! clean shaved, and a
cigar, or half an ounce of tobacco, for twopence."
DISPUTES.—It is an excellent rule to be observed in
all disputes, that men should give soft words and hard
arguments ; that they should not so much strive to vex,
as to convince an opponent.
Lord Byron, who had a constant struggle against his
better nature and nobler convictions, mournfully acknow-
ledged, " The Christian enjoys an advantage over the
infidel in having an exalted hope through life."
At a Baptist missionary meeting in Nottingham, Mr.
W. Newbiggen said that in a country in South Africa, in
order to save a certain " ornament,' consisting of knobs
of clay fastened on the back of the head, the natives stick
a wooden fork in the ground, and sleep all night with
their neck between the prongs ! Almost as bad, he
thought, as tight lacing.
A HAPPY THOUGHT.—Among other ventures which
were sent to Buenos Ayres, after the successes of the
British forces, were a considerable number of hearth-rugs. '
For these, however, as there were no fire-places, no pur-
chasers could be found, until at length the supercargo of
the vessel in which they were, hit upon the expedient of
placing one of the most showy upon a horse as a sort of
saddle. The hint was immediately taken, the rugs were
soon sold off, and in a few days every horseman was in
possession of a saddle.
WRY LADIES CANNOT EDUCATE DOGS.—The fair sex,
though possessing such unbounded and proper influence
over us, notoriously has but little controul over their
canine favourites. This, however, solely arises from their
seldom enforcing obedience to the orders which they give
them. If a lady takes a dog out for a walk she keeps
'constantly calling it, lest it should go astray and be lost.
The result is, ere long, that the dog pays not the slightest
'attention to her, his own sagacity telling him that he need
zot trouble himself by watching her, as she will be sure
to look after him.—Col. Hutchinson on Dog-breaking.
A MISERLY MARQUIS.—A few days ago the furniture,
sze.'
°f
the chateau of the miserly Marquis d'Aligre, in
the "liege of Chatou, between Paris and St. Germain,
Was sold by auction. This old Marquis was the richest
Man in France ; he possessed 300 houses in Paris and
other towns, 50 estates in different parts of the kingdom,
and upwards of £2,000,000 capital placed in the public
funds of different countries ; and yet the furniture of his
favourite chateau was old, dirty, wretched in the extreme,
and would have disgraced a low lodging-house. There
was not a decent picture, not a cushion or curtain or car-
pet that was not ragged, not a chair or table that was not
ricketty, not a piece of crockery that was not cracked.
NUTRIMENT IN VARIOUS KINDS OF FOOD.—In bread,
every 1001 b. weight is found to contain 801 b. of nutritious
matter ; butcher's meat, averaging the various sorts, con-
tains only 351 b. in the 100 lb. ; beans, 92 ; pease, 93 ; greens
and turnips, which are the most aqueous of all vegetables
used for domestic purposes, furnish only 81b. of solid nu-
tritious substance in 100 ; carrots, 141 b. ; and—what is
very remarkable as being in opposition to the hitherto
acknowledged theory-100lb. of potatoes only yield 251 b.
of substance valuable as nutritious. One pound of good
bread is equal to 21 or 31b. of the best potatoes, and 751 b.
of bread and 301 b. of meat are equal to 3001 b. of pota-
toes ; or to go more into detail, alb. of bread and 5 oz. of
meat are equal to 31b. of potatoes ; but 11b. of rice, broad
beans, or French beans (in grain), is equal to 31b. of
potatoes. _ _

VEGETABLE LIFE.—The following is taken from a lec-
ture delivered in Exeter Hall, by the Rev. John Cumming,
during the present year (1848) :—" Did I ever tell you of
an illustrative incident recorded in the travels of Lord
Lindsay ? He states that in the course of his wanderings
amid the pyramids of the patriarchal and interesting land.
(Egypt), he stumbled on a mummy, proved by its hiero-
glyphics to be at least 2000 years of age. In examining
the
mummy, after it was unwrapped, he found in one of
its closed hands a tuberous or bulbous root. He was in-
terested in the question how vegetable life could last, and
he therefore took that tuberous root from the mummy's
!land, p
heavenlanted ito descend ut in a sunny
poni soit, l aand in the course of a
llowed the rains and
ews of ew Weeks, to his astonishment and joy, the root burst
forth and bloomed into a beauteous dahlia."

NECDOTE OF BISHOP BARRINGTON.—A young re-
lative apprised the bishop of his intention of taking holy
orders ; not that he liked the church as a profession, but
because from the bishop (as his near relative, and having
'ranch splendid preferment at his disposal) he might na-
turally expect a benefice. "In truth," returned the
prelate, in reply to this frank avowal, " the expectation
la not unreasonable. We are closely connected, and I
have much in my gift. What would content you ?"
" From you, my Lord," rejoined the young Oxonion,
frankly, "nothing under a living of six hundred a-year."
" You shall have that provision for life out of the church,
not in it. That income shall be assigned you from my
Private resources. God forbid that I should be accessory
to any man's taking holy orders from sordid motives.
The stipulated provision is yours ; but mark me, on this
Condition, that you remain a layman.”—The Closing
Scene.

ANECDOTE OF FOOTS.—When in company with a num-
ber of gentlemen who were trying to outvie each other in
marvellous statements, the conversation happened to turn
upon a calamity which had not long previously occurred,
the explosion of the powder-mills at Hounslow Heath.
Many extraordinary stories were related, and amongst the
number. one of the company declared that, as he sat
having his hair dressed, his servant and himself were
thrown out of the dining-room into the bedroom, where
they broke a looking-glass to pieces. The story was
smiled at as a problematical one ; but Foote, who had
hitherto listened with seeming attention, immediately said
he was not at all surprised at the circumstance, as he
himself was forced forty feet from the place where he sat
at breakfast by the shock he received at the concussion.
" Aye, sir," said a young gentleman, " that was very
strange indeed." " Not at all, sir," replied the English
Aristophanes, for on finding the room shake, I ran down
stairs into the street to inquire what was the matter."
SHOPPING, AND A SHOPMAN.—Shopping ? What a
bore ! I grant you, shopping is at times a bore, especially
if you go to shop with ladies. A man is never more out
of his element than when be enters the haberdasher's.
There you stand, perhaps, at the door shop, for the time,
a discarded appendage—a mere fag-end of humanity—
whilst your fair friends plunge into the mysteries of silks,
satins, laces, and mouslin-de-laines, winding up with the
purchase of a yard of bobbin or a penny-worth of pins.
I have admired the patience of Job, but am astounded at
the endurance of a shopman. And yet is patience his
only virtue ? Verily, as Madame de Stael said of Bona-
parte, " He is a system, not a man ;" a regular combina-
tion of physical and moral excellencies. The labour of a
Hercules, the winged heels of Mercury, the lying versa-
tility of Edipus, the eloquence of Cicero, the good looks
Of Gannymede, the craft of Ulysses, the polish of a Paris
"-all are mere items in the composition of a perfect shop-
num—Dublin University Magazine.
A SMART DOG.—A shepherd once, to prove the quick-
ness of his dog, who was lying before the fire in the house
Where we were talking, said to me in the middle of a sen-
tence concerning something else—" I'm thinking, sir, the
Cow is in the potatoes." Though he purposely laid no
stress on these words, and said them in a quiet uncon-
cerned tone of voice, the dog, who appeared asleep, im-
neediately jumped up, and leaping through the open
window, scrambled up to the turf roof of the house, from
Which he could see the potato field. He then (not seeing
the coiv there) ran and looked into the barn where she
,wasi and finding that all as right, came back to the
nouse. After a short time met he shepherd said the same
words again, and the dog repeated his look out ; but on
the false alarm being a third time given, the dog got up,
and, wagging his tail, looked his master in the face with
10 comical an expression of interrogation, that he could
tot help laughing aloud at him, on which, with a slight
growl, he laid himself down in his warm corner with an
offended air, and as if determined not to be made a fool
of again.—American paper.
M.R. O'BRIEN DURING THE PASSING OF THE SEN-
TENCE.—Mr. Smith. O'Brien, true to the last, profaned
the awful scene with an outbreak of temper which proved
•as little his courage as it did his self-respect. He defied
his Sovereign and his judges, and contumaciously repeated
his offence, as far as words could do it, in a tone worthy of
the most flagitious malefactors at the Old Bailey, or the
wretched offenders familiar to the authorities of Bow-

street. He still showed that utter want of meaning or
consistency which has marked the whole of his career.
When he recommended all Ireland to follow his example,

did he mean that he had resisted arrest, or openly rebelled ?
To urge a nation to avoid the police, to hide in the moun-
tains, and take up arms against a constable when pressed,
is a ridiculous sort of suggestion for any sane man to make
anywhere, much more one placed in Mr. O'Brien's awful
position—on the very steps of the scaffold. On the other
hand, if he seriously meant that his countrymen ought to
rebel as be had done, he might at least have had the grace
to acknowledge the fairness of his trial and the justice of
Lis verdict. But his speech meant neither one thing nor
the other. It was simply an act of vulgar bravado and
Peevish persistence in crime ; and to all intelligent persons
Will condemn the man, much more than an honest con-
fession would have done. Mr. O'Brien has added one
more example to the great induction, that a causeless re-
bel is
generally a vain and foolish man.—Times.
MILK FOR THE PEOPLE.—There exists on Long Island,
near Brooklyn, several manufactories of milk—the process
of which should be known. One of these dairies covers
! space of 600 feet front by 300 feet deep, carefully closed
_t
so as to be as private as possible—the business of the
People being to drink the milk, not to know how it is
rnade. In this enclosure 400 cows are kept all the year
These cows are fed on the refuse slop of whisky
distilleries, and it is given to them warm. Each barrel
costs six cents, but being adulterated with water and cheap
feed brings the price still less. Such is the fondness of the
!ows for this vile compound, that after having fed upon it
x°l* a week or more their appetites become so depraved
t
hat they will take no other food. The result is, their
Milk-producing organs are stimulated to a wonderful
re' de-
;. they yield enormously, but soon become diseased ;
e'r gums ulcerate, their teeth drop out, and their breath
becomes fetid. Though thus diseased, they do not fall
away in flesh, but on the contrary puff up and bloat to an
4,l.ppearance of great fatness ; their joints stiffen so that
tPLeY cannot lie down, and rarely or never come out alive.
.I_l6ad as this is, the milk is afterwards mixed with molasses
-7,.aotrer and whiting, and then sold to the people of New
k for pure milk ! Any one may observe the thirty-six
'fas that carry it round every morning. It is of course
-very injurious to children, who use it in much greater
I_n
41isotities than adults. Some idea may be formed by corn-
tilting one barrel of slop to a cow, costing sixpence, and
milk Produced being 80 cents.—New York paper.