The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1848-05-23 00:00:00

flay 23,18448.

Literature.
VARIETIES.
.merican Sun advises Louis iippe to go to
sunerica, to embark his sons in trade, or purchase them
Larras, and offers him a place for his grandson in the
French editorial depart ment of his journal.
THE MARCH OF REFINEMENT.—A correspondent of
the Suffolk Chronicle states that he lately witnessed a
cheveaux de frize of parasols in the hands of the
•children of the national School at Halesworth !
Question.—How can a daughter-in-law be her mother-
in-law's mother-in-law ? Answer.—An old widower
flamed Gregory had an only daughter. Mr. Johnson, his
friend had also an only daughter. Mr. Gregory fell in
'eve with Miss Johnson ; and Mr. Johnson, in turn, with
Miss Gregory. They were married, and thus each lady
became mother-in-law to her mother-in-law, and each
gentleman married his daughter's daughter-in-law.
WILL OF LORD GRANVILLE SOMERSET.—The late
Right lion. Lord Granville Somerset, M.P. for Mon-
Mouthshire, who died on the 23d of February. at the age
of 56, had executed his will in the year 1842, commencing
with these impressive words :—" This is my last will and
testament. I commend my soul to that glorious Trinity
whose power 1" recognise, whose commands I have dis-
obeyed, but on whose mercy and forgiveness I rely through
the mediation of my Saviour."
DOLGELLY AND BARMOUTH.—When we approached
the Drenchenfels and the first scenes of the Rhine's glory,
~..servant of my friend R—, well cognizant of his native
Merionethshire, asked me if his was the Rhine, which he
had ;ward was so beautiful ? I told him we were not yet
In its most striking gorges, but that this was the first
great scene, of which so much had been written. " Well,
said the honest Welshman, " I think we can match
it between Dolgelly and Barmmith." " Indeed, you can,"
Was my reply, and surely the Welshman was right. Let
any One who has knowledge of the two scenes call to me-
mory that glorious estuary reposing in beauty and crowded
with grandeur; look down its avenue of sparkling water
the distant sea, glistening in the western light ; let
rt. glance on the one side at its curving shore of oak-
*Prulkled meadows edged and broken by rock, and on the
.°tlier to the pillared precipices of Cader Idris, and then,
11T1 all respect to the noble substance of the flowing
the°, gaze at its vine-spotted banks, and say if there is
%latest approach to rivalry.—Taffourd's Vacation
Rambles A
BAD SHOT.—Once when he was staying with Mr.
eke at Holkham, a well-known professor was also one
Of the visitors. The venerable historian had never had a
fun in his hand, but on this occasion Mr. Coke persuaded
him to accompany the shooting party ; care, however,
'was taken to place him at a corner of the covert, where
it was thought the other sportsmen would be out of his
reach. When the rest of the party came up to the spot
*here he was standing, Mr. Coke said to him, " Well,
what sport ? You have been firing pretty often ! "
'" Hush !" said the professor, " there it goes again !"
and he was just raising his gun to his shoulder, when a
man walked very quietly from the bushes about 70 yards
in front of him. It was one of the beaters who had been
sent to stop the pheasants, and his leather gaiters, dimly
seen through the bushes, had been mistaken for a hare
by the professor, who, much surprised by its tenacity of
life, had been firing at it whenever he saw it move.
" But," said Mr. Buxton, " the man had never disco-
vered that the professor was shooting at him !"—Life of
-Sir T. F. Buxton.
O'CONNELL'S CHARACTER OF LORD NORBURY.—
g 4 The seemly character of the bench was in the hands of
a bad keeper when committed to the care of Lord Nor-
bury. All who remember him as he presided in court,
can bear witness that nothing appeared to delight him so
ranch as the uproar of merriment created by his volleys of
Puns. What is your calling and occupation my honest
?' he once asked a witness. Please your Lordship,
I keep a racket court.' So do I,' rejoined Lord Nor-
bury, in gratified allusion to the racket which his witti-
cisms constantly excited in court. It was an appropriate
joke at the burial of a joking, hanging judge—that jest of
a butcher's apprentice that Brophy the dentist told me.
When they were burying Norbury, the grave was so deep
That the ropes by which they were letting down the coffin
did not reach the bottom of it. The coffin remained hang-
ing at mid depth, while somebody was sent for more rope.
~Aye,' cried a butcher's 'prentice ' give him rope enough,
Z.oll.'t stint him ! He was the boy that never grudged rope
a poor body !' It is told of Lord Norbury, that when
Passing sentence of death on a man convicted of stealing a
Watch, he said to the culprit, ' My, good fellow, you made
a grasp at time; but, egad, you caught eternity.' "
O'Neil's Irish Recollections.
REPUBLICAN PARIS.—Is there any former lover of
fParis who imagines that, when the barricades of the last
insurrection have been removed, the devastations repaired,
and the street-lanterns mended. Paris will wear, with its
republican face, the same aspect as it did of old ? If there
be such a man, let him still cherish the fond delusion, and
not come and see. Or, would he learn the truth, let him
try the experiment of taking from the fairest face he knows
and loves, the gay, coquettish cap of gauze and ribbon,
the light, butterfly-like chef-d'oeuvre of the most tasty
'alley of a French marchande des modes, and let him put
911 that head the Phrygian cap of liberty, the bonnet rouge,
to all its startling coarseness of red cloth. He thinks,
Perhaps, that the face will be the same, or at least wear
the same expression as before ! Fatal mistake !
Ani-
mated , gay with colour, flushed with the red reflected
!lilts, picture-like even, may be the pretty face—but it will
have utterly lost its former charm ; it will look staring,
vulgar, swaggering, disordered, at best Bacchante-like.
Or, to take a more psychological comparison, let him think
, the company of the beloved, and try to remember how he
looked upon the objects that surrounded him. Of a surety,
whatever their natural want of beauty, they wore a pecu-
liar look of brightness • there was a magical veil of rose-
coloured charm upon all. Let him then reflect upon the
aspect of the same spot when she was gone. The objects
remained the same, but certainly they wore not the same
air to his eyes ; they were the identical objects he had
~,,°Uked upon before, and yet he could have sworn that they
'Aere changed—that the whole landscape was discoloured.
:1;k1 so it is with Paris. Streets, squares, and houses are
ITte same, but its moral appearance is totally altered :
there is a changed look in the very air; the impression on
the mind is as different as rose-colour is from gray upon
the sense; the phychological tint has been washed out,
blurred away, and replaced by a troubled, confused, inde-
scribably unharmonious and uncongenial colour.—Black-
wood's Magazine.
THE REV. DR. WNEILE ON THE DEFENCE OF PRO-
TESTANTISM.—At the meeting of the British Reformation
Society on Thursday week, the Earl of Canan took the
chair, and the Rev. Hugh M'Neile made a powerful
address, which he opened as follows :—" In every warfare
it is an important part of good generalship to take a com-
prehensive view of the position occupied, so that we may
know the real nature of the enemy we have to oppose,
and not spend our strength on one point while we leave
some other point unguarded, where that enemy may dis-
cover our weakness. (Hear.) Mr. Bevan referred to a
kindred Institution, which has aimed at the preservation,
if possible, of what is commonly called our national Pro-
testantism. So far as we may aver from the facts of the
ease, the labours of that Institution have been successive
' failures; the progress that our legislation has made, has
been in defiance of every such remonstrance ; and our
national Protestantism, as commonly understood, has
disappeared from our national statute-book. If the
attempts of that Institution have been failures ; if there
be every reason to believe that no such attempts can now
succeed, that the progress of legislation alluded to must
go en, so far as man can judge, in the same course which
We have deprecated, but which we have failed to arrest ;
Via remains of our position for defence ! (Her.)
rve felt compelled to look about, and examine thias ; and
have thought that the nation should be considered in a
tPfold aspect : its representative aspect, which is presen-
eq by the Legislature and the Government ' • and its actualt
isyect, as God sees it, which is presented by the state of
"e Population. And it is quite possible—l do not now
venture to state a fact, because I am not in possession of
sufficient data,—but it is quite possible that the nation in
its actual state may advance in the proportion of real
religion found in it, while the laws passed in former times
for the protection of that religion are disappearing from
our statute ..book. (Hear, hear.) But then, if this be so,
t must be by the use of means ; and if, while we acknow-
ledge the failure with reference to what is commonly un-
derstood by " National Protestantism," we turn our view
and our hope to the only other alternative—the actual
Position of the populat ion, 'then, I think, that efforts such
as this Society invites us to, are prggisely those which
ell, consistent Christian and Protestant ought to re-
double through England. (Hear, hear.) We have no-
thing else for it.
STATE OF TRADE IN PARIS.—In an article in the laSt
number of Blackwood's Magazine, entitled " Republican
"is" a picture is drawn, fearful in its detais, but yet
true, of the condition of Paris and the Parislians, since
the overthrow of the monarchy, the puerile folly, the
Wildness, and the despotic tyranny of the ferocious mob
Who now govern France alternately with the military
vforce Think not also that the Boulevards retain their
flittering aspect of rich decorated shops, teeming with the
u, rY of colour and gilding as before. We are in the
midst of a financial crisis, and misery and want are in-
. eLeasing daily. Trade has ceased with the want of con-
fidence ; ruin has fallen on many ; workmen have been
n'issed, and shop-boys turned adrift in hundreds upon
the streets and, in spite of the " roasted larks" all ready
for hungry mouths, and " showers of gold" which the
Government promises as about to fall from the heaven of
the republic upon the working classes, it is not only on
faces of the tradespeople at their shop doors, or behind
the
e mockery of their plate-glass windows, that there is
;InPressed a gloom, but upon the many hundreds and
thousands who seek work and cannot find it, and who
Wander up and down with hanging heads, or wile away
their weary hours in loungingabout the outskirts of the
disputing groups. See ! how shops are shut ! See !
dossed sadly the placard of " boutique d louer," upon the
doors, meets the eye at every ten steps, and tells a
Ike of bankruptcy ; how many rows of dismal shutters,
e coffin-lids erect upon their ends, give by day to the
and that funeral look they formerly only gave by night;
Jlcl chalked upon these shutters are still the words—
armes donnes au people," a still remaining souvenir of
the days of tumult, disorder, and bloodshed, when every
_ease in Paris was scrawled over by the same announce-
!cent, in order to prevent the forcible entry of the mob
into
Wprivate dwellings, to carry off defensive weapons. If
vaest,3te aside into one of those monster-hops, with their
cop rridors, and avenues, and galleries, and stair-cases.
Which lately were so crowded that it was difficult for cus-
• 'enters,i to be served even by the hundred commis within,
74 at a scene of desert listlessness meets your eyes ! There
loscarce a solitary customer who wanders amongst their
• I.7ni w
g galleries, vainly draperied and beshawled with all the
riders of modern manufacture. The weary looking
BhOP 2 boys, the few that remain, run out of breath from
wan`Lend of a long gallery to another, to get what you
', for they have now several departments of the
eps.t..,ablis it hment
as under their care. There is no trace here of
~ris as w.”

The it

MISFORTUNES OF UNCLE JACK.

(Prom " The Caxton," in Blackwood's Magazine.)
Uncle Jack was a light-hearted, plausible, enthusiastic,
talkative fellow, who bad spent three small fortunes in
trying to make a large one. He was a great speculator ;
but in all his speculations he never affected to think of
himself,—it was always the good of his fellow-creatures
that he had at heart, and in this ungrateful world fellow-
creatures are not to be relied upon ! On coming of age,
he inherited £6OOO from his maternal grandfather. It
seemed to him then his fellow-creatures were greatly im-
posed upon by their tailors. Those ninth parts of huma-
nity notoriously eked out their fractional existence by ask-
ing nine times too much for the clothing which civilisa-
tion, and perhaps a change of climate, render more neces-
sary to us than our ancestors the Picts. Out of pure phi-
lanthropy, Uncle Jack srarted " a Grand National Bene-
volent Clothing Company," which undertook to supply
the public with inexpressibles of the best Saxon cloth at
is. 6d. a pair ; coats, superfine, £1 18s. ; and waistcoats
at so much per dozen. They were all to be worked off by
steam. Thus the rascally tailors were to be put down,
humanity clad, and the philanthropists rewarded (but
that was a secondary consideration) with a clear return of
30 per cent. In spite of the evident charitableness of this
Christian design, and the irrefragable calculations upon
which it was based, this company died a victim to the ig-
norance and unthankfulness of our fellow-creatures.
And all that remained of Jack's £6OOO was a fifty-fourth
share in a small steam-engine, a large assortment of ready-
made pantaloons, and the liabilities of the directors.
Uncle Jack disappeared, and went on his travels. The
same spirit of philanthropy which characterised the specu-
lations of his purse attended the risks of his person. Un-
cle Jack had a natural leaning towards all distressed com-
munities : if any tribe, race, or nation was down in the
world, Uucle Jack threw himself plump into the scale to
redress the balance. Poles, Greeks (the last were then
fighting the Turks,) Mexicans, Spaniards,—Uncle Jack
thrust his nose into all their squabbles ! Heaven forbid I
should mock thee, poor Uncle Jack ! for those generous
predilections towards the unfortunate; only, whenever a
nation is in misfortune, there is always a job going on !
The Polish cause, the Greek cause, the Mexican cause,
and the Spanish cause, are necessarily mixed up with
loans and subscriptions. These continental patriots, when
they take up the sword with one hand, generally contrive
to thrust the other deep into their neighbours' breeches'
pockets. Uncle Jack went to Greece, thence he went to
Spain, thence to Mexico. No doubt he was of great ser-
vice to these afflicted populations, for he came back with
unanswerable proof of their gratitude in the shape of
£3OOO. Shortly after this appeared a prospectus of the
" New, Grand, National Benevolent Insurance Company,
for the Industrious Classes." This invaluable document,
after setting forth the immense benefits to society arising
from habits of providence, and the introduction of insu-
rance companies—proving the infamous rate of premiums
exacted by the existent offices, and their inapplicability
to the wants of the honest artisan, and declaring that no-
thing but the purest intentions of benefiting their fellow-
creatures, and raising the moral tone of society, had led
the directors to institute a new society, founded on the
purest principles and the most moderate calculations—
proceeded to demonstrate that twenty-four and a half per
cent. was the smallest possible return the shareholders
could anticipate. The company began under the fairest
auspices : an archbishop was caught as president, on the
condition always that he should give nothing but his name
to the society. Uncle Jack—more euphoniously desig-
nated as " the celebrated philanthropist, John Jones
Tibbetts, Esquire"—was honorary secretary, and the ca-
pital stated at two millions. But such was the obtuse-
ness of the industrious classes, so little did they perceive
the benefits of subscribing one-and-ninepence a-week
from the age of twenty-one to fifty, in order to secure at
the latter age the annuity of £lB, that the company dis-
solved into thin air and with it dissolved also Uncle
Jack's £3OOO. Nothing more was then seen or heard of
him for three years. So obscure was his existence, that on
the death of an aunt, who left him a small farm in Corn-
wall, it was necessary to advertise that " If John Jones
Tibbets, Esq., would apply to Messrs. Blunt and Tin,
Lothbury, between the hours of ten and four, he would
hear of something to his advantage." But, even as a
conjuror declares he will call the ace of spades, and the
ace of spades, that you thought you had safely under your
foot, turns up on the table—so with this advertisement
suddenly turned up Uncle Jack. With inconceivable sa-
tisfaction did the new landlord settle himself in his com-
fortable homestead. The farm, which was about two hun-
dred acres, was in the best possible condition, and saving
one or two chemical preparations, which cost Uncle Jack,
upon the most scientific principles, thirty acres of buck-
wheat, the ears of which came up, poor things, all spotted
and speckled, as if they had been inoculated with the
small-pox, Uncle Jack for the first two years was a thriv-
ing man. Unluckily, however, one day Uncle Jack disco-
vered a coal-mine in a beautiful field of Swedish turnips ;
in another week the house was full of engineers and natu-
ralists, and in another month appeared, in my uncle's
best style, much improved by practice, a prospectus of
" the Grand, National, anti-Monopoly Coal Company, in-
stituted on behalf of the poor Householders of London,
and against the Monster Monopoly of the London Coal
i Wharfs.
" A vein of the finest coal has been discovered on the
estates of the celebrated philanthropist, John Jones Tib-
bets, Esq. This new mine, the Molly Wheel, having
been satisfactorily tested by that eminent engineer, Giles
Compass, Esq., promises an inexhaustible field to the
energies of the benevolent and the wealth of the capitalist.
It is calculated that the best coals may be delivered,
Thstrneq. fnr now 1
yielding a profit of not less than forty-mil per cent. nn
to
the shareholders. Shares, £5O, to be paid in five instal-
ments. Capital to he sub.cribed, one million. For
shares. early application must be made to Messrs. Blunt
and Tin, solicitors, Lothbury."
Here, then, was something tangible for fellow-creatures
to go on—there was land, there was a mine, there was
coal, and there actually came shareholders and capital.
Uncle Jack was so persuaded that his fortune was now to
be made, and had, moreover, so great a desire to share
the glory of ruining the monster monopoly of the London
wharfs, that he refused a very large offer to dispose of the
property altogether, remained chief shareholder, and re-
moved to London, where he set up his carriage, and gave
dinners to his fellow-directors. For no less than three
years did this company flourish, having submitted the
entire direction and working of the mines to that eminent
engineer, Giles Compass—twenty per cent. was paid re-
gularly by that gentleman to the shareholders, and the
shares were at more than cent. per cent., when, one bright
morning, when least expected, Giles Compass, Esq. re-
moved himself to that wider field for genius like his, the
United States ; and it was discovered that the mine had
for more than a year run itself into a great pit of water,
and that Mr. Compass had been paying the shareholders
out of their own capital. My uncle had the satisfaction
this time of being ruined in very good company : three
doctors of divinity, two county members, a Scotch lord,
and an East India director, were all in the same beat—
that boat which went down with the coal-mine into the
great water-pit I

FRANCE AND TAHITI.—RIGHTEOUS RETRIBUTION.—
The Scripture abounds in instances of retribution : and
history, since that day, supplies similar. Have yoli ever
considered how very singular it was, that the Jewish
people, on taking a certain neighbouring prince prisoner,
should have treated him with such barbarous indignity,
as to cut off his thumbs and his toes ? It was not their
custom to do so ; so faras we know, they never did it in
any other instance. And presently we learn the reason.
" And Adonibezek said, Threescore and ten kings, having
their thumbs and their great toes cut off, gathered their
meat under my table ; as I have done, so bath God re-
quited me." You recollect also what Samuel said to
Agag :—As thy sword hath made women childless, so shall
thy mother be childless among women." You recollect
the gallows that Haman prepared for Mordecai, and who
was hanged upon it,—Haman himself. These are inti-
mations of God's dealings even in this world. And one
modern parallel shall suffice, and then I must release you,
(Cries of "Go on," and " Hear hear.") I look at one
of our Royal residences in the neighbourhood of this
metropolis, and there I recognise some fugitives from
their own country,—one that was a King, one that was a
Minister; there may be one that was an Admiral,—l
know not certainly how that is. And if in the contem-
plation of that fallen party I were invited to name one
name, which would bring out God's righteous retribution
upon men—and I say this without any unkind
feeling towards them—(hear, hear)—it would ill become
an Englishman to triumph with the slightest feeling of
unkindness over fallen greatness—(hear, hear) ; and if
any such feeling seem to mingle with what I shall say, I
beg utterly to disclaim it ; I have no such intention. I
claim history as a fair field of comment for him who ob-
serves God's dealings among men, and I altogether dis-
claim any personal unkind feeling—(hear, hear) ; but
if I were to name a word calculated to make the ex-King
of France and his Ministers and Admirals tremble
—calculated to make them see how the hand of God
has been over them—the word I would name is,
Tahiti ! (Cheers.) The annals of Propagandism in its
most barbarous age supply nothing more barbarous than
the treatment which an innocent Queen received at the
hands of France. (Hear, hear.) The men of God, who
had been the messengers of Christianity to her and her
realm, who were respected by her, approved by her,
located in her territory, attended to by herself and her
court as their teachers—these men were rudely thrust
from the island by violence. The priests of an opposite
faith, which she disclaimed, were forced upon her accept-
ance. When she entreated their departure, they re-
fused ; when, exercising her authority, she compelled
them to depart, the powerful arm of France was raised to
force them back upon her. And at last she was herself
turned from her realm, consigned to a small island in the
neighbourhood, a fugitive from her home, and her land
itself made an example .of the vanity of propagandism.
(Hear.) It was not worth the pains to France as a colony ;
it was only the triumph, the vain triumph of propa-
gandism. There was an island where Protestant
Christianity had planted a successful mission ; the
jealousy of Rome could not bear it ; it was a bright spot,
over which she wished to throw her own sable mantle ;
and she did it with a violence that deserved any possible
recrimination. (Hear, hear.) Of course, Ido not mean
to say that all that has been done since has been in con-
sequence of that act. That is the misrepresentation, the
wilful misrepresentation that will be made of what I am
saying ;—the gentlemen of the press—those who pretend
to lead, and, to a great extent, do lead the public mind,
will say, " that we have the secrets of heaven, and that
this was the sole cause of the French revolution." I said
no such thing. (Hear, hear.) But I said this, "that if
it please God, in the visions of the night, to bring the
history of that affair of Tahiti to the recollection of Louis
Philippe, and of Guizot, while they lay awake on their
beds, (hear) and if it please God, by the teaching of the
Holy Ghost, to give them repentance for their treatment
of Pomare, (hear) I shall rejoice and be glad."—Rev. Dr.
MWeile at the British Reformation Society Meeting.