The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1833-12-27 00:00:00

rot to

ioLpoli. it's a shame
Think of sick treachery. (Laughter.)
The Lord Mayor.-1 am afraid that if the parish were to
give you a fortune, you wouldn't do much good with it. The
lady's voice seems to be rather affected; and it really sounds in
my ear as if gin was the cause of it.
Mr. Flockton.—No, my Lord, the creetur got cold by sleep-
ing in the open hair.
The Lord Mayor.—Well, you must manage the business
without my assistance; I can't compel the parish-officers to
give you afortune.
Miss Gush.- -What, not a dirty two pound ten! Then I'm
blessed if we don't find a way to plague them; won't us, Bill?
Flockton.—Blowed if we don't.
This promising couple then moved OfZ "the carpentering gen-
tleman having put on his hat before he left the room, while the
!fold Mayor assured them that if they were ever brought before
hint for any offence he should not forget their conduct that day.
ivue. Booker, one of the officers of Bishopsgate, informed the
Lore( Mayor that the two lovers had lived together in Petticoat-
lane for the last 12 months.
A watchman of Portsoken Ward was charged before the Lord
Mayor on Tuesday by the constable of the nightwith has ing acted
"obstropulously" and "blasphemed" Alderman Johnson,
The constable stated that the defendant was a great spoutei,
and opposed the return of Alderman Johnson. That, however,
was nothing, if be had kept his politics out of the watch-house,
j but having drunk too much "heavy," he strutted into the place
of repose for the guardians of the night, and began to curse Al.;
derman Johnson in such a manner that it was impossible to
!isteu with common patience to such "horrid blasphemy." 2—
When he 'rot tired of blaspheming the alderman, he set-to at
' sing Alderman Scales, so that it was hard to say which was
• -4!, the curses or the blessings, the row was so tremendous.
exercise of the lungs added to the drunkenness of the
eot, -, it was thought nectssary to take care of him for the
iit, he had not at all lost any of his party spirit by sleep.
Ile it ct,ridant said that it was all nonsense to say that old
Johnson ,-as an alderman. He might be an alderman's aide"-
man, but ;3,.. certainly was not a freeman's alderman. Michael
Scales nos- the real "hone fried" alderman.

Constable.—There's the way he goes on, your lordship, call-
ing the alderman old Johnson. A. common individual might
talk that way, but for a watchman to blaspheme an alderman,
*it's what ought to be punishable by the law of the land.
Defendant.—Law ! What do you know about law? I say
that Alderman Scales is the alderman, as right as a trivet, and
I'm blest if he a'nt showing 'em a taste of the law every day.—
He'll come down upon them with a " fiery fashus" as'll give 'em
a regular double twister. Blest if she'll get out on it.
The Lord Mayor.—lt is evident, defendant, that you are pot
sober yet ; and certainly such a man is not fit for the situation
of watchman, for instead of keeping the peace, You have been
doing all you could to break it.
Defendant.—Why, my lord, I have a good right to blow up
ould Mr. Johnson. You see, my lord, he wanted to show how
hospitable he could be, and he sent the beadle round to say that
he had paid a round sum for shins of beef to make broth for the
poor people. So I sends my wife for a pint or two of the broth,
for I thought it was like other broth, but a spoonful of it was
enough to poison the devil.
The Lord Mayor.—l desire that you will not make any more
insolent observations. Your habits are such as to render you
quite unfit for the protection of the public.
Defendant.—Why, my lord, my wife and me, and the young
'one, supped a little of the stuff ; and, my eyes, what we did
suffer -1 Begging your lordship's pardon, we all on us was so
bad that we laid down on a clean bed and got up out of a dirty
`one.- (Great- laughter.) You never seed sich a convicted go.
The constable said that the watchman insulted the alderman's
broth in the watchhouse every bit as much as he did at that mo-
ment, although it was very nourishing.
Defendant.—Ay, ay, I wish you nourished your bowels with
a basin of it, and I'm -blest if you'd care who'd be alderman long.
(A laugh.) If it wouldn't rake you, as it did me and my poor
family, I'm not a living man now, which I am, blessed be God,
in spite of it.
• The Lord Mayor.—Get away. You are the last man whom
I would allow to be connected in any way with the police, and I
shall write to the ward authorities my opinion of you.
The defendant retired, and upon getting outside he gave three
cheers for Alderman Scales, and blasphemed Alderman Johnson
and his broth in such a manner as really quite shocked the
hearers.