Star.
London, England, 1822-09-07 00:00:00

MR. CANNING'S SPEECH
AT THE CANNING CLUB, LIVERPOOL

I am quite overpower'd (you'll belit.ve me I trust)
With the claps and the shouts of a club so august;
And shall never forget with what transport and glee,
You have toasted yourselves, our great . Monarch, and me.
Out of door: th i the laugh sure against us will go,
To brined with what swell our own trumpets we blow,
Let the vulgar reflect, who us egotists call,
If we .I', praise ourselves we shall get none at all! •
. s ime ten years ago, by the weight of your purse,
You resoty'd you would have me for better or worse,
And by methods so pure put me into my seat,
I resolv'd I'd reward your exertions so great.
But so many want places, I could not suit all,
For if I pleas'd Paris, i disoblig'd Pam; • • .
While Tom, Dies., and lIA SAY, BEN, 808. JACK, and Mar.Sasal,
Laid the ',lame upon me, though ' was fled by the COW.
But be of go d comfort, and mind what I'm telling
(You know that quack-medicines I'm liceni d to deal In),
There's a certaui rich cordial chat's double distlll'd, •
With which I well know all your bosoms are
'Tis the " Essence of Loyalty,' generous juice!
You niuet keep it well cork'd and preserve it for use.
A very hew drops. if judiciously taken,
When you get in a scrape, will at once save your bacon; .
And if swallow'd in doses, 'twill often convert
A man to a Member who'd hardly a sairt ;
While the venest beggar among you may rise, Sir, •
Collector to be, or at least Supervisor !
You remember the tug that we had. with Old Nap,
How he doubled at last, and walk'd into our trap;
How the gem rous Sir Ilunsoa in chains held him fast,
Until Math (foe less cruel) relieved him at last;
You remember (our national faith to display)
When the fighting was over, we shut the brave AST;
What immortal renown we at Manchester gain'd,
Whi:re our swords were with blood of the Radicals staln'd;
How, when closely penti'd up in a corner we'd got 'em,
We knock'd 'em down, cut 'em up, ran 'ens thro', shot 'ern;
Now the stoutest Reformer was torc'd to turn tail;
How we shipt Catabett off and clapp'd Hunt into jail;
Nor in our kind efforts thought fit to relax,
'Till we gagg'd 'em, and bound 'em, with Six famous Las;
And, with the strong aid w the Holy Alliance,
Set Reform both at home and abroad at siehance
It's a very strange thing, when our foes are so humble,
That you loyal men should grow sulky and grumble. •
You have danc',i, you have frolied, you've eaten your fill,
And now you've got sok,. you carp at the bill.
Why, who could suppose we could cut such a dash,
Without paying the piper and sporting our cash?
True, th. tables are turti'd, and the Radicals laugh,
For their Inllies are full, and they're fatter by half;
And they preach now to us from the very same text
That we preacli'd from to them, when so sorely perplex'd :
And declare that for both individuals and nations,
When ground' to the dust, the best remedy's " 7:faience!"
IlecoLeck ‘N hen our foes we so freely were killing,
You ruble r,soiv'd you could spend your Fast chiding,
And now y rue bargain;—it's rather too Lite ;
I woui..: eb..cently have you submit to your fate;
You may hr;/Se., drink water, and lower your diet,
13eg or starve, timg or drown, if you'll only be quiet !
Thus you and y ur troubles I put on the shelf,
And now come to a suliect more pleasing—myself.
I need scarce horns you who all knose me so well, •
;low I've managed my cards, and have made my tricks tell;
ot;- t.rest and duty-I've always combin'd,
Nor C(.111.1 e'er see the last until both were conjoited.
To 1.1-hon I went, well, my duty was clear,
I got by tit,
.1,11 Fourteen Thousand a' yeat.;
I c.-rne ba..f. when they found out a place for my use,
Of the business I knew just as much as a goose;
But my duty at once to myself and my King
Required me- to yield, and to pocket the thing.
I agrerd with the squad, just as brother with brother,
Tiro' one friend I'd lampoan'el, and had shot at another.
'Till it. a vagary 'twixt frolic and spleen, ' • •
One day belaudcd, next libelled, rise ./artm:: . •
Which, so puzzled old GEORGIC (who lov'u her, no doubt),
In a striaige ht of passion, he kick'd me right out! •
Since es i•, a I've been iluutid'riug like fish out of water;
Mr duty now calls to a fut-slistatit quarter,
To goy. in some nriltirxra of simple fliud,ws, .
Who ne'er herd of Ilefsem. nor will taxes refuse;
And when I get there, I shall merit put curse,
If, still true to myself, I don't look to my purls
To leave good th.ngs here, I confess that I grudge,
But Grottos, watt% have me, and so I must budge.
Since the Margets has jab: made so free with his gullet
(I'd have silv.t, him th, jib had fate favour) my bullet),
I perhaps might have got to the top of the wheel,
And have led in the Commons, but tor that cursed 5
(A sad lucky dog tor so young a beginner,
Would to lleav'si that hi, father had made him a spinner !)
Ile, like a grim ghost's always crossing my way;
At Oxfoid tie beat me you know Cattier day,
And all the wield says he's to lead in my place—
But sure you don't call this " defeat or disgrace."
And now tuneluale, for I'm got rather dry,
To keep up your spirits I'd have you all try.
lle:e's •• Success to the Club," in a bumper of ale;
We had best sill the name, for its grown rather stak !
Liverpool, August, latt'a.
• A little knot of merchants and master tradesmen, who dis-
tribute the Borough patronage, and in whose hands the Member
is a mere •,:uppet.

Monday la,t an itinerant showman, who for some
time past exhibited two rope-dancing monkies about
the town, pitched his stage, on his ss ay to St. 13ar-
tholoniew Fair, in Covent-Garden Market. When
his I,w es and cords were fixed, and the nionkies in
their lull dress were about to commence, the cele•
bratedfiiing plenum came by with his basket, and
having tui 'Jibbed himself with a bottle of gin, he
leaped (110,11 the stage, and treated the showman and
one of L. c monkies with a glass each ; but the other
monkey declined taking any, and was leaping about
to avoiti it; but the pieman served out the second
glass, and the other monkey took his with apparent
gladness. The pieman again seized the monkey who
declined it betote, but he still scorned to take any.
The by-standers maw called out to the pieman m
throw it at him. The piernUn flung it in his face.
Instantly the monkey who drank the gin, and who
washalf drunk by this time, sprung upon the piensab,
seized him by the arm, and would have torn the
piece of flesh entirely out, only for its master, who
with much difficulty made him relinquish his hold.
The pieman was dangerously wounded, and was car-
ried to a doctor's shop to get his arm dressed : he was
then carried home to his lotigitv at the Seven Dials.
THE RETORT COURTEOUS.—A member of one of
the learned pi ofessions was driving his dermet along
the road at To, ting, in Surrey, when he overtook a
pedlar, with his pack, and inquired what he had to
sell? Tile man produced among other things, a pair
of cotton Braces—they were sixpence he said. The
Gentleman raid the money, and then said, " You
have, I sol.p»e, a license?"—" Y—e—s, was the re-
ply, hesitatingly. —" I should like to see it." After
some further delay it was produced. {4 My good
fellow, all's right I see. Now, as Ido not want these
things, )(i shall have them again for three-pence."
The bargain was struck; but how surprised was the
querist to find a summons served upon him to attend
the County Magistracy, sitting at Croydon. The
Gentleman was convicted in the full penalty, for sel.
ling goods on the King's highway without a hawker's
license—he is a lawyer!