Star.
London, England, 1830-08-07 00:00:00

LITERARY INTELLIG ENC E.

Some grave moralist has called the Wks, "children five feet
MOW and many a grave fool has talked in contemptuous tone of
the " weaker sex," meaning thereby not only weakness of body, but
of mind. The ladies of the present day, however, are driving such
expressions out of use ; for the female literati, in the lines suited to
their taste and habits, shew an excellence which is not a matter of
queztipn, but of certainty. We do rot know whether ladies have
much to do in writing the Ladies Magazine ; indeed, we rather
suspect they only contribute a share ; but we cannot conceal that
we have been amused by the Ladies Magasdee of this month, more
than, by several of those appropriated for general reading. The ar-
ticles of this number are really all good, and the lady or gentleman
alto cannot find amusement in its contents is, point de douse, too
stupid to relish literature, and should give it up for more congenial
pursuits. We shall abridge a lively tale for our specimen, entitled
" 'flue Runaway."

THE RUNAWAY.
A JUVENILE REMINISCENCE.
It was on the sth of November, one thousand seven hundred and
ninety--, when I wanted two months of completing my fifteenth
Ita', that being seriously in love with six ladies (four in their teens,
el.e a widow of thirty, and the other a bouncing lass of two-and.
ta enty,) I made my election, and ran away from home to follow the
last. who had gone down into Nottinghamshire to reside with her
mother. But though Fanny (that was the dear creature's name)
hien played the very deuce with my heart, I do not think I should
have deserted the other five, had she not possessed one charm which
they all wanted. She could perform in tragedy as well as in court-
ship, and we had made love in acting, before love made me coin-
niit the rash act of running away. I had sighed and languished,
sued and swore, in ten-syllable heroics; she had done the same, ex-
empt the swearing; and when, at last, 1 " threw off my disguise and
appeared myself," she did the same too. Then it was we both
vowed eternal fidelity ; and in the cruel moment of separation, she
protested she would fly with me and take to the stage, if I would
take to the stage and fly to her. I did so : but I was three weeks
getting ready. First, I had to collect my travelling wardrobe,which,
as 1 was not old enough to have the care of my own things, required
due circumspection. l had to abstract front the family chest of
drawers what I wanted, at convenient opportunities, and without ex-
citing suspicion. However, by the end of three weeks I collected
two shirts, one pocket handkerchief, a best waistcoat, and three
pair of stockings. These, with what I knew I should , have upon
my back, would be sufficient, I thought ; they were dwposited in
a trunk, big enough to hold them and myself too, which I had con-
cealed behind the water-butt in the back kitchen.
Now I was equipped; and now I only wanted every body out of
the way, that I might get out of the way myself. A favourable
opportunity occurred. I seized it. With my trunk on my shoulder,
and dressed in Indigo blue silk stockings, nankeen fy-for-shames, a
white dimity waistcoat, a snuff-coloured jacket, and a hat quite
good enough for travelling in the dark, (and that is the most I can
say for it,) I sallied forth about eight o'clock in the evening, on
the sth of November, running as fast as two short legs would
catty me, to the George and Blue Boar, Holborn. I was in the
very nick of time. The coach was just setting off. My luggage
was thrown into the basket ; I paid my fare • took my seat
roof ; and in five minutes was fairly on my ;cod to my fair.
Until this moment I had never been farther from London than a
rural excursion to Putney on Sunday, or a visit to Greenwich Hill on
Easter Monday. Judge, then, what my sensations were when the
coachman told me, at three o'clock in the morning, that St. Paul's
was sixty miles behind us ! I shall not attempt to desctibe them.
believe Columbus himself (or Dr. Robertson for him) has told us
what he felt when he first saw the shores of the new world. They
were very like what I felt when 1 first saw a milestone sixty miles
from London.
arrived at my journey's end about nine o'clock the next morn-
ing ; and having inquired the road to where my Fanny lived, I
flew, not only on the wings of love, but in a pair of new top-boots,
which I bought before I set out of the Inn, to seek her. We met !
Al, Fanny ! your form was not moulded by the graces, I confess ;
for of the three geometrical properties essential to all solids, Nature
tad been most prodigal of the breadth and thickness. And you had
a development of head, Fanny, with a circumference of throat, which
could nog be called symmetrical. These are things I now rentem.
Ger. I saw them not then • but what I did see, and what I still
recollect with emotion, was, you had your hair screwed up in
whity.brown paper. No woman, not if she were tinctured with the
cestus of Venus herself, should ever let her lover see her head barbed
with crackers, and the roots of her hair straining from the akin, as if
imploring relief from the twiated torture. It is particular)] ugly ;
and thetefore to be particularly avoided. As to husbands, Ido not
s.c how the danger can be averted. So it must be left to take its
chance, along with all the other dangers which menace love after it
has been to church.
We met. Such a meeting ! And we talked. "Oh ye gods,
how we talked !" With a delighted ear, Fanny listened to all the
perils I had encountered in my daring enterprise.
The next morning I was to breakfast with the future partner of
my histrionic glory, and be introduced to her mother. Quite the
reverse. I was very much fn love ; that is a point no man shall
dispute with me, and have the best of the argument, except it be
in his own opinion. But I had an swear of sleep to settle, and I
was still busy with the account when, at noon, and not before, the
cisambennaid rapped at my bed-room door, to announce that It was
twelve o'clock.
And so I opine, it was entirely owing to the chambermaid at the
Spread Eagle at —, leaving me to sleep till twelve o'clock in
to? day, not only that I and Fanny never met again, but that 1, in
toy own individual person, never eclipsed the fame of Garrick.
Fur alas ! when I returned to the abode of my beloved, at dinner
instead of breakfast time, I was met by her mother, a tall, thin,
stately old lady, in a mob-cap, and a green silk gown, (I think I
see her now !) who conducted me into a closet where she kept her
best china and crockery. She bade me sit down. The old lady
drew a letter from her pocket. I had no manlier of doubt it was
all over with me. I had no manner of doubt it was a hue-and.
cry after a certain person, who devoutly wished himself at that mo.
meat in another country.
Sly calamity was complete. It was overwhelming. People
should never keep love-letters ; after they have once read them,
and wept or smiled, kissed or crumpled them up, according as the
nature of their contents may require, the very next moment they
should be consigned to Vulcan, and suffered to flit up the chimney
as parsons, clerks, and regiments of soldiers. He is the only safe
onstos of such records.o Dilaceration leaves behind it a potentiality
of discovery which may become a positive ease, by the aid of gum
and curiosity. The world is full of fnstances of unlucky proofs,
supplied by that tender indiscretion which hoards bits of paper, be-
cause they express in ink, what has been said in words a hundred
coda hundred times before. Love's tablet should be the heart. It
has "ample room and verge enough" for as much as would fill a
ream of
•gilt-edged vellum Bath letter-paper; and all other, save
that invisible writing, should be treated as the ancient philosopher
advised us to treat our best friend; like something that may one
day become our worst enemy. In short, the very best of Bramah%
patent locks, are as patent as the doors of the freemasons' Tavern
compared with the inflammatory process of combustion. Burn--
bum—burn, I say, to every discreet lover; as to the indiscreet
lovers, who can pity them, when they sometimes burn their own
fingers by neglecting to burn their love-letters ?
I was the -victim of this neglect, and I " own the soft impeach-
ment." Three lettersof Fanny's, "warm from the heart and faith-
foi to its fires," which I had concealed as I hoped, in the bottom
of a punch-bowl, never used except at christenings (and my mo-
ther had done breeding, and therefore it was not likely ever to be
used again,) were discovered. These litters betrayed my plans, my
'Lancet, and the immediate object of my night ; and the letter
which the' old lady drew from her pocket, and which was no
Wet dons, was from my father ! The end of the matter was, l
looked very sheepish while the old lady read me a lecture upon filial
übedience, and all that ; very disconsolate when I heard my sentence,
which wee, never to return to the house' n the expectation of seeing
Falmagain.
Id me then—l was going to say, like our first parents, dri-
ven forth from Paradise.
I returned to the Spread Eagle, dejected, miserable, almbst heart-
• biolten, and as ravenous as a wolf. Boys at fifteen are notapt to be
satisfied, like Octavian, in the filoutstaineers, with " drinking
hiige draughts of sorrow down, and banqueting on tears." Their
appetites are their masters, and keep company wttb grief in a very
• amicable sort of way. SO I ordered a duck and pancakes for dinner,
sod then sighed and meditated till it was ready.
The landlady of the Sprmd JiLagle, a mother herself, and a kind,
henetglent, gOod-hearted woman into the bargain, had penetrated
my sebret Oo" thelollowitig morning, therefore, after I had break-
fasted, she•came into my* room, and faking hold of my• hind,
" Young gentleman," said sbe; " I ant sure you have run away
from home • Placed with her success, the good woman next
strove to eta and spirits
.• • and fiaished by telling me that a' coach
for London would plus' th'roUgh in the evening, and that she would
book me a place 'beide.' Ada she did so : nor did she suffer me to
be once out of her sight, during the rest of the day ; but made Me
dine with her own family, sia remain with them, till the hour When
the coach arrived, *mkt set-off in it. •
It was about ail o'clock id the morning. when I reached London.
I took up my boa, walked down the yard, stepped into coach that
was waiting, and gave the man isle directions Where to drive.
Theis( I at out; and just githe dawn of a chill November man.
ins Was hating d wad at tisk threshold
.ot 'sly bide AU the
wiodoirs Were closed. • 1 b''C ad dot UTalf to )kea# ):y!t It sev(illl
hardly Ix added fear that withheld ate. ; •
t)it but thee* use ass who bath watched sad weld. It was
w) ma I Ms bad peered sleepless eights, aad aawksts days,

during the absence of her wayward son. She had sought no bed
that night; and beard, or thought she heard, sounds that told her
of his return. Gently the door unclosed • and pale and are-worn
my mother stood before me. The smile that brightened her pallid
features was my welcome, and my pardon. She folded me in her
arms, and wept for very joy. Nor then, nor ever, did an upbraid-
ing word fall from her lips; but then, and ever, my own heart
smote me, as I looked upon her wan and anxious face, or recalled
its silent (and the keener because silent) reproaches.