The Sun.
London, England, 1829-12-05 00:00:00

COUNT OP RrO,UESTS

sr..tlTLfitr V. TUBES,
Mr. Nicholas Tubbs appeared before tlu CotTimissioners
upon summons to show cause why he refusoi or neglect-d
to~,rythe sum of 11. 17i. 6d., being the b,l tnee of an
account alleged to be due from him to Miss Jura Slattery ;
of "which account the following is a true copy, as it was
handed into Court on behalf of the plaintiff:—
" Mr•. Tubbs toe Miss Slattery.
" 1529 Jentvary toe Joon six rnunth
"in Strucisbun toe Missy TuLbs ......... G 0 0
" Dedukt cash and od thing... 4 2 6

" balans stil doo i 17 6"
: • The COURT, taking the singular orthography of Miss
Slattery's account into consideration, asked het what hind
of " instruction" she had given Miss Tubbs?.," Oh
dear !" said Miss Slattery—,, finishing in-tiuetion of
course. lam pecult,r sorry-to say that Mi•s Tohbses'
education had been neglected shameful through the perspi-
cuity of her father, Mr. Tubbs here; and by her inatna's
desire I gave her the coo de grace."
The COURT—That was finishing her with a vengeance !
You don't mean to say you kill'd her ?---:"lfeavew,abovo !
what an orrible idea," shrieked Miss Slattery. " 3lc kill
her ! Oh dear ! No indeed, I never gesticulated such a'
thing."
The COURT—Then what did yon mean, 'Madam, by
saying you had given her the coup de grace.?—. Why, of
course, I grave her the grime!" replied Mi4s Slattery. •
" All the grace she has .be got from me ;—fur Miss Tubhs,
poor thing! had been so shameful put about that she nol
nothing.' But by my shuperior intuitions, and being her-
self extreme seditious• in learning, she iii now tit for any
tummy ; for I havegast her:a grae'd' ill' the. bearing het self '
in-the4se-dH11;" (rltteryi gime/fair) ."'tilt"in' tfie
suscitation of herfiagering ; and
The Cnuttx—Well Mr. Tubbs, you hear what the lady

says—and perhaps you understand her better than we

,
—What have you to say why we should not order you to
pay her claim ? Mr. Tubbs—Why, i've got to sey es
this ;—who employed she to be meddling and making-
with my dartar ? Miss Slattery—Who employed me
was not einpley'd—l was engaged, Tubbs; and I was en-
gaged by your wife, who has more sense in hiT thumb-
nail than you have in your whole body—Tubbs !
Mr. Tubbs—Very good ;—and now your Worships I'll
just take and tell you ail about it.—My wife says to me.
Tubbs, says she, what d'ye think ?—I don't know, say. I,
Why, says she, there's a nice old lady, up in Mrs. Davis's
two pair front, coot's took a notion to our Bridget—that's
my darter, your Worships. Well, says I, and what of
that?—for I keeps a coal-aped, your Worships, and does
a trifle in salt fish and green grocery besides. Why, sass
my wife, says she, you know, Tubbs, Pridget's a big wench
now; and if you'll let the old lady finish her up a bit in
dancing and pannyforting, she'll take it out in coals and
wedgytubbles ;—says my wife to nte—just so.—And with
that, I says to my wife, says I,—Shut your potato:,
trap, Mrs. Tubbs, says I ; and you mind your business,
and let Bridget mind the shop ; for I'll hays no ends
titheryhumming and gallivanting, I can and do assure you,
Mrs. Tubbs, says I. No, but Tubbs, says she. Don't Tubbs
me, says I;—I'll hays nu more words about it ; and with
that I thought it were all dropped ; till one n: ruing, as I
were getting out of bed, I sees my wife's pocl;et hanging
out from under her end of the bolster, and out vf the slit
of the pocket this ere note were sticking :
Note handed into Court and read by the Clerk : —" Miss
J. Slattery's compliments to Mrs. and Miss Tid,bses, and
requests the honour of their company to a ?ca.& 11-pa ty
on Friday evening "
_ .

Mr. Tubbs, incontinuation—Blow the! your Worships,
if you mightn't have know lied me down with a f other, as
I stood there with nothing on but my shirt !--)ou might
indeed. So I crumples up the note, ani I drups it iut,
my wife's mouth—for she's got an ugly knack sleeping
with her mouth wide open, you'll understand ; an,! I whips
on my breeches and things, and down stairs I crecps, leav-
ing her fast asleep, with the note in her mouth ; and off I
goes to market to buy my green-stuff and six sacks of
white-eye potatoes—

• Here the Court cut abort Mr. Tubbs' narratit,, by pc
ramptorily ordering him to say, in three wore:,, why he
objected to Miss Slattery's claim.
" Why because I laid a nenthargo upon it'" replied
Mr. Tubbs.--" I sent her word time after Cale if she
quodrilled nay Bridget, I wouldn't be answerable; I quar-
relled with Mrs. Tubbs; and I were everlasting blowing
up Bridget. But what can one man do agen °three we-
men?—lt were all of no use ;...--say what I would ; do
what I could, toy coals, cash, and turnips were clandeg-
tinated out of my house to pay for the quodrilling, and I
verily believes they'd have drill'd me into pod, if 1 hadn't
put a atop to it by packing Bridget off to her uncle's at
Northampton."

Evidence was then called to prove that he haul ropat-
edly given Miss Slattery notice that he would not be an..
swerable; and of course Miss Slattery was nonsuited.

THE SIAMESE BOYS.—Mr. BOLTON, the
surgeon, under whose care their health is place t, is hav-
ing, under his superintendence, wax models made of the
anatomical juncture of the boys ; so that should any thing
fatal happen, there will be preserved a faithful representa-
tion of the anatomical structure of this extraordinary
freak of nature. We hear also that Mr. B. is diligently
preparing an account of them, which will be interesting
to scientific men. The casts from which the modals will
be prepared are made by Mr. SIEVIER, the eminent
sculptor.

ENGLISH THEATRICALS IN HOLLAND.--
An English Theatrical Company has been lately esta-
blished in Holland, performing alternately at Amsterdam,
and the Hague. Mr. AUBREY, the manager, by offers of
liberal terms, bad formed a very respectable company. The,
p.rformances commenced the beginning of het month,
when Mr. KEAN, junior, performed Young Norval with
great applause. Miss F. H. KELLY arrived soon after,
and appeared on the 19th in the part of eirdiet, Mr. KLAN-
playing Romeo. The house was crowded, and the per,
formance was received with so much applause that it we*
repeated at the Hague on the following Saturday, the Aciog
and Queen of the NETHERLANDS and the Prinoe arid Prier-
cess of ORANGE forming part of the auditory. The com-
pany returned to Amsterdam, for the purpeee of performing
there on the following Tuesday, but were thunderstruck In
find that the manager had disappeared with all the money
that had been received. A meeting of the performers was
held, when Miss F. 11. Ker.tr, to save those of the com-
pany who had no means of support from the dreadful con.
sequences of the manager's desertion, off, red to bear the
whole expenses, and pay the performers their full salar;ea
for a month, provided Mr. KEAN would give his gra.tuineee
services during that period—a proposal to which he in,
stantly agreed; but some of the performers not apteeoving
of the arrangement, it was not carried into effect ; nod it ie
now apprehended, that after having commented with so
much promise, the undertaking will be entirely abandoned
after performing four nights in aid of this poorer members of
the company, for which benevolent purpose Mr. KEAN and
Miss F. H. KELLY have given their services gratuitously.
M. de TALLEYRAND was born for intrigue,
and he has been true to his vocation ; he has intrigued for
and against every Government from the Constituent As-
sembly to the restoration : for them, when they began to
be established, or when he could hope to be well reward"!
by them ; against them, when they began to totter, and
there was more to be gained by their presumed suce
censor. He is the cleverest and most amiahle egotist
in the world. Amidst the rapid evolutions of his police.
he has laboured with admirable perseverance in beheli
of his private fortune, and not one change has taken place
in the destinies of France but has increased the pewee
and the influence of the former Bishop of AuTuN, The.
horrid recollections of the murder of the Duke n'Eeze
G HIEN have lately been conjured up against him ; to de.
fend himself he has accused the Duke of Rovraeo ; but if
he has succeeded in showing that the former Mlnister
Police was guilty, according to the notions of many people,
lie has not been so successful in porinz that he hinneelf
was innocent. For the rest, he has rendered such eeee
vices to the reigning house, that he had a right to use
this expression in a letter to Loins XVIII., which be
published :—" The enemies of your august family will nut
pardon me for having twice replaced yeea on, the throne of
France." The chief talent of M. Taeetvetaxn consists
in making himself master of & husineas in conversation,
and in appropriating to himself, in an acute discussion, the
written labours of en able secretary this ~secretory has
frequently been Count D'HAOTVR4VE, pupil to this great
Duke of Cnotseue, and who has retained n youthful ima-
gination to the most adeanced age. Every body's bon='
loots have been attributed to AL DE TA I-T.EVRAND, but his
has been still better phorsed with having the peculiar tntrie
of Count n'HaueTaryE fathered upon him. If NA tql-,
LEON, for example, required a repast or ;any diploma:it,
tpoa of
111. 3l.
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afterD
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title of the paper, be would say, " you can g'ti
on
eirfilill!titaitelsy,'lnreYgpal:;taecsLouis XVIII. has di
UTERIV lia,l Hill en ,114,11 for three e!rtees.:
Eke the rest, has no. tisaug! it t
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