The Sun.
London, England, 1846-06-04 00:00:00

DESPERATE

HELFORD RI VER.

Again has the tranquillity of this ill-fated river been
broken by the dui of war. It appears that Colonel
SouthgateOof the Helford Oyster Brigade, being on duty
near the spot, fell in with a detachment of the Royal
Female " Triggers," who were busy making prisoners
of the muscle, cockle, limpit, and other defenceless
tribes. The colonel instantly called to them to sur-
render, which they indignantly refused. He then
attempted to take them vi et armis, when they opened
such a well-directed discharge of mud and shingle
as compelled him to jump
at the gallant officer,
into his boat and sheer off. Nothing daunted by his
defeat, although miserably daubed with mud, and
otherwise disfigured, the gallant colonel having collected,
as he thought, a sufficient force,
battleagain
alalonndedtLanbdealictriff
drawn up his men in order of
dispatched an aide-de-camp to repeat his former demand,
on whose visage a reply was, in an instant, most legibly
stamped, by a muddy fist. The colonel, now greatly exas-
perated, and elated with the thoughts of carrying off so
many fair captives to -- Castle, ordered his men to
advance; which they did in the most perfect order,
not-
withstanding the storm of mud and shingle that now
assailed them. For a moment they_ halted—again they
dashed forward—but the volleys of mud had rendered
unserviceable their organs of vision ; and, in the most
Quixotic manner, they were soon in hand to hand fight
with rocks, boats, and stumps; while the enemy, taking
advantage of the confusion, dashed npon them, sub-
stituting " claws " for bayonets, and for a long
time the battle raged with great fury. Often were
these amazons laid low, but instantly springing
upon their feet, they fought with redoubled ardour.
For a long time victory seemed doubtful some-
times inclining to the stronger, sometimes' to the better
half ; until the commander of the former, recollect-
ing that victory or defeat would be equally disgraceful,
and that " the better part of valour is discretion,"
wisely withdrew his muddy, bloody troops into the
boats, where they lay silent with shame, and blind
with mud, while the fair victors remained in quite
possession of the field—an apt illustration of that fa-
vourite motto—" Though lost to sight, to memory
dear." The following is the official return of killed
and wounded :—Helford Oyster Brigade, Col. South-
gate, severely "screwed," uniform spoiled, and other-
wise maltreated. Aide-de-camp Major Toy, slightly
wounded, " flop" in the " chops." Captain Wheatley,
badly " screwed," not dangerously, beauty destroyed.
The fortune of war brought this gallant little officer in
juxta-position with his former sweetheart, whom he
slighted; and ample proof did she give him that she
still wished to make an impression on him. Royal Female
Triggers, no casualties.— West Briton.

On the 16th ult. a man, in the pit of the Royal
Theatre at Vienna, shot himself in the middle of the per-
formance, covering the persons immediately around him with
his blood. A singular coincidence in this frightful event is,
that at the instant before the report was heard, an actor on
the stage, reciting his part, uttered the words, " A shot is
about to be fired;" and for a moment the audience fancied
that the sound came from behind the scenes: The perform--
ance was stopped till the lifeless body was carried out, and
then resumed.