The Sun.
London, England, 1836-09-01 00:00:00

MARLBOROUGH-STREET.

A COMFORTABLE COUPLE.—A thick-set operative, in a
flannel jacket, well known in the neighbourhood as a vender
of sawdust, presented himself before the Bench, having
previously, what is expressively, if not very elegantly termed,
" pulled a mug" for the occasion, and requested leave " to
ax his Vership about a pint of adwice."
Mr. CONANT gave the applicant the required permission,
without, however, recognising in the querist one of the re-
gular weekly visitors of the office, and helpmate to a female
who was equally punctual in her attendance to answer the
very common offence of having taken a drop too much.
I'm Humphrey Vilkins, your Vership, said the applicant
wot goes about with my donky, and sarves the nayberwood
vith sawdust, and if your Vership vants any vitnesses of my
'spectabilify, I can call twenty customers who'll prove that
I'vegota most undesirable character.

Mr. CONANT—What is your application? Wilkins—
Vy, I've got a hooman for a vife as don't do the right thing
by no means ; for though I vorks like a trump all the veek
to pervide her a comfortable home—and I naterally expects
to find things comfortable—she lays hold of every uniwersal
harticle, and spouts it to buy gin. She's got two children
wot she starves, and it was o'ny yesterday as she takes the
boy's boots off his feet, and his cap off his head, and turned
'em into gin. She's sitch a rum un for liquor that I've
known her svaller a sack of sawdust in the arternoon—that
is, the price on it ; and though I've threatened to put her
in the plenipotentiary at Millbank, if she don't keep sober,
she on'y laughs, and says I'm bound to find her in common
necessaries, and gin's wery necessary to her. Now, your
Vership, I'm a man as never wants a shilling, and can turn
my hand to
,any business, or take a tip-top sitivation in any
perfession in the vorld, and naterally I takes my half-pint or
so ; but here's a hooman w'hill go out in the morning vith
a good gown to her back, and vill come home in the after-
noon as ragged as a bone-cadger. Vot I vonts is that your
Vership will advise one how I'm to hact vith sitch a precious
handful ? _ _

Mr. CONANT—If she gets drunk and is brought here I
will commit her to prison.
Wilkins—Prison aint of no use. It must he something
worserer. If your vership vill grant me an order to put
her in the vorkhouse, I'll pay any compliment the overseers
chooses to ax.

Mr. CONANT—We have no power to do that, nor would
it be proper to allow your request, if we had.
The applicant went out of the Office, and having ad-
journed to an adjacent public-house, he succeeded in drown-

ing his sorrows so effectually, that he was brought in the
evening to this Office, and fined the usual sum for being
intoxicated.

MA RYLEB ONE.

Yesterday a demure-looking woman, named Caroline
Scoffen, appeared on a warrant before Messrs. RAWLINSON
and HOSKINS, to answer a charge of assault preferred against
her by Sarah Smith, a lady of dashing appearance.
Mr. RAWLINSON told her she must curb her temper,
and fined her 20s. for the assault, ordering her, in addition,
to enter into her own recognizance to keep the peace for
the next twelve months.