The Sun.
London, England, 1854-06-02 00:00:00

RUSSIAN COOKERY.

(From Punch. ) •
Under this head may be included three dishes—one
provided expressly for the Czar; another prepared for
discussion amongst Foreign Ministers and Consuls ;
and a third done up for the swallow of the Russian
people. The dishes alluded to are so many versions of
a story ; as, for example, that of the bombardment of
Odessa. We subjoin samples of these concoctions. They
are all addressed to Nicholas ; but

THE FIRST IS PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL.
"Sire,—With the greatest regret I have the honour
to inform your Majesty that, in revenge for a shot or
two fired on a flag of truce, all the works of this town
have been bombarded and utterly destroyed by the ene-
my's steamers; with the exception of the commercial
mole. The shipping protected by the mole, and the
town itself, were unaccountably spared ; but all the
vessels of the Imperial mole were burnt. The powder
magazine has been blown up • 700 men have been killed,
and three times that number wounded. I have the
melancholy satisfaction of assuring your Majesty that I
did all in my power to avert the calamity ; but the men
were shot dead at their guns ; and, I am sorry to add,
had to be pricked up to them by the swords of their
officers. I may, however, congratulate your Majesty
on the blunder committed by the enemy in sparing the
commercial mole and the city, which latter was occu-
pied by soldiers, the inhabitants having all fled.

" CSTEN-SACKEN."
THE SECOND IS DIPLOMATIC.
" Sire,—The allied fleets of France and' England have
bombarded this city and its defences, on the groundless
pretence of our having fired on one of their boats carry-
ing a flag of truce. Thanks• to the valour of your Ma-
jesty's gallant troops, whose loss has been small, the
invaders were repelled after inflicting some trifling injury
on the Imperial works, and a fortunately inconsiderable
amount of wanton damage on our peaceful city. No-
thing could equal the courage of the brave soldiers, ex-
cept the fortitude of the faithful citizens. These during
the bombardment thronged the churches, imploring pro-
tection for themselves and pardon for their enemies, who,
schooled by the chastisement which they have received,
will, it may be hoped, hesitate in future to attempt the
crime of spreading devastation and slaughter amid the
pacific dwellings of commerce.

" OSTEN-SACKEN.
•
THE THIRD IS INTENDED FOR HOME CIRCULATION."
Sire,—Again, by the favour of St. Nicholas and the
blessing of St. Alexander Newski, a glorious victory has
crowned your Majesty's arms.
"The combined French and English fleets, men-
of-war and steamers, numbering 1,000 sail, have
bombarded Odessa for 48 hours, providentially with
no effect but the displacement of a few stones
of the fortifications and the demolition of a house
which belonged to a Jew, and of a Latin church,
" Our loss amounts to two killed and five wounded.
Seven hundred of the enemy's ships have been sunk,
and two hundred set on fire and blown up.
" This glorious result is to be attribute to the heroism
of your gallant soldiers, inspired and aided by Saints
Nicholas and Alexander. While the priests of the or.
thodox Church in her sacred temples, surrounded by
adoring multitudes, amid showers of shot, shells, and
rockets, were chanting the praises and invoking the help
of the patrons of holy Russia, behold a miracle ! Those
two celestial champions descended from the clouds, and
while one of them stopped the balls of the enemy, the
other helped the men to point their guns.
" Under these circumstances I have directed a Te
Deum to be sung in all our churches.
" OSTEN-SACKEN."
Thus, in Russian cookery, the dishes served to the
Emperor are plain ; those dressed for ambassadors and
diplomatic agents are more spicy ; and the richest and
most highly seasoned are composed for the common
people. Simple viands a're esteemed a luxury, and no-
body but the Czar tastes truth au naturel.