The British Press; or, Morning Literary Advertiser.
London, England, 1822-12-21 00:00:00

PASMONABLE INTELLIGENCE.

The Marquis of Goasam has arrived at his father); (the
Duke of Montrose) house in Grosvenor-square from a tour.
Lord Chesterfield has feR town for his beat, Bradley Hall.
Derbyshire.
Ord William Beatinek has left his, seat, Lyon, for the
Duke of Portland's. seat, Welbeek, Notts.
Lady v ophia Heatheote has arrived in tows from her mo-
ther's (tbe Countess of Dysart) seat, Ham House, Surrey.
The Earl of Makneshnry bas herived at his seat, Heron
Court, Hants, from a tour.
The Hon. Robert Clive, M.P. has left town for his seat,
Oakley Park, Salop.
B. Keene, Esq. has left town for his seat, Westowe Lodge,
Cambrisieshire.
Lord St. Helen's arrived ve%terdav in town from tho Earl
of Essex's seat, Cash iriburi Park, Herts.
LordiMialleton has arrived at his scat, Wollaston House,
Notts, from Birds!, Yorkshire.
Sir nosing Farquhar, Bart. du left town for his seat, Roe-
bumpkin.
Lord Langford left town yesterday, for his seat, Cooper
lli 11, guriey.
Viscount Loire has left town for his seat in Herts.
F. H. Rigby, Esq. has left town for his seat, Miidey Hall,
Essex.
Colonel Palmer, M.P. has left town on* tour.
Arrivals at the Pulteney Hotel, Piccadilly :—Coont Word
from Paris ; Mr. and Mrs. Owen from their seat in North-
amptonshire.
Mr. and Mrs Orme have left the St. George); Hotel, Al-
bemarle.street, for their seat in Cheshire.
The Earl of Besborougb left town yesterday for his seat,
Richmond.
Lord and Lady Clive have' arrierd at their father's the
Earl of Powys' seat, Walcot, Salop, front a tour.
Departures from Hodgson's Hnlel, Dover-street :—Mr.
and Mrs. Sullivan, for Useu scat in Hants ; and James
Stuart, Esq. for Brighton.
Lord Amberst has left town for his seat, Montreal House,
Kent.

A Lady walking with Mr. (afterwards Lord) BACON, in
Gray's Inn-walks, asked him whose that piece of ground
was lying neat under the walls? H.• answered, " Theirs."
Then she asked bim if those fields beyond the walks were
theirs toot He answered, " Yes, Madam, these are ours, as
you are ours, to look oa, and no more."

In the time of CUAllli.ill 11. there was a Minister deprived
for incorformity, who arid unto soma, of his friends, that if
they deprived him, it should cost an hundred men's lives,
the party enderstisod it as If. being a turbulent fellow, he
would have moved sedition. and complained of bim ; where-
upon, being coovented and opposed upon that speech, he
said. his meaning was, That if be lost his benefice, be would
practice physic, and then he thought be should kill a hundred
bee it time.
Mister Mason, of Trinity College, seat his /mini() another
of the Fellows to borrow a hook of him, who told him. "I am
loth to lend my books eat of my chamber ; but if It please
thy tutor to come and read upon it in my chamber, he shall
as long as he will." It was winter, and some days after the
wee Fellow sent to Mister Kw/4 to burrow Isis bellows ;
but Mister Masai said to his pupil, " lam loth to lend my bel-
lows out of my chamber ; but if thy tutor would come and
blow the tire in my chamber, be shall as long as be will."
When Lieutenant O'Bautst, who was always called Sky
Rocket Jack, was blown up at Spithead in the Edgar, be was
saved oe the oarriuee of a ben ; and when broaght to the
Admiral, all black and wet, he said a ills pleasantry, " I hope.
Sir, you will excuse my dirty appeared. for I came out of
the ship in so great. a burry that I had out time to shift
myself."

A man with one eye laid another man, that be (the one-
eyed person) saw more than the other. The wager was ac-
cepted. " You have lost," sacs the first, " I can see tree
oyes in your ace, add you can see only one in mine."
A merry but poor man being laughed at for wearing a sbnrt
cloak, replied, " My Wends, you need not jeer me, for such
is the state of my pocket, that it will be king enosigk before I
bay o done with IL"

MIRACLiS BIPLAINBID on NATURAL Parneirxes.—A certain
Journalist in London follows at the distance of thirty years,
pari rusk. You say it is impossible, but the explanation is
ready : —the period of thirty ye ra perishes by his breath, and
lets him advance cheek by int 4, or pars paws, with him whe
went before. If you express surprise that his breath could
be so potent, his answer is again ready—:feeds produced it ;
that is to sty, the Isut tbitay semi were years of revolutionary
war, which a breath aneihilated at the restoration-of the
BOURBONS ; of whom it cannot be predicated, as of bastards
like Nsroi,roa, that there was a limo *ben they were not.
They reigned not for thirty years, and therefore tbc thirty
years were not. '

Loss 117 Cmanacenu.—A few days ago a notorious informer
came before one of the Magistrates of Bow-street Police-
office, who is remarkable fur his quickness of repartee, and
said to him, " If you please, your Worship, I CUPS to com-
plain of a newspaper, which in its reports about my inform-
leg against publicans has taken my character away."—" In-
deed !" replied his Worship. " Well then, you should go and
thank them for it, as i sboald sdppose there is nothing you
would be so glad to lose as your character." The informer
sneaked away amidst the laugh of all present.
The late Mt. Suratztait was 141 a visit to Lord ILCIIIESTER,
the father of the protest. Bari, at his place in Dorsetshire, at
a time when rails to servants were in fashion. The silts
dramatist had contrived to satisfy the avaricious demands
of butlers, footmen, and other Sober myrmidons ; but there
was still another claim to be answered on the outside of the
house, in the person of the groom who held his breve, and
he had not n sows left to satisfy this necessary demand. Ile
therefbre with perfect sang frail asked the man if be coned
change him a guinea ? " Yes, Sir," was the answer, " I be-
lieve I can.' Can ye ?" says Mr.I3BSAIDAN ; "then by
41-4 yea area richer man than! am ;" and so saying stack
spurs to his horse, and rode off to the great distress of poor
Joss, the groom, who was in the act of putting his hand in
his pocket tor the change.

A witty rogue coming into w lace shop, said be haul occa-
sion for some lace; clioiee whereof being sliewed him, he at
last pitched upon one pattern; and asked them how much
they would hate fin so much as *mild reach from ear to ear?
for so reach ho had occasion for? They told him for so
much : so some few words passing bet wren them, he at last
agreed, and Lord down his money for it, and begin to mea-
sure oa his own besd, thus sayiwg: .! Owe ear is here, and the
other is nailed to the pillory 10 Bristol, soul I fear pin have
not U. muds atlas Mee be you at present, as will perfect my
bargain ; therefore this piece shall suffice at present in part
of payinefilouid provide the rest with all expedition."

• - - -
Bishops llosnuti and SHERLOCK were both of Catherine Ilall,
Cambridge, both of the same year, and both pupils of Mr.
Bowan, * learned Scotsman. When they were freshmen, they
were called to lectures in Tally's Oakes. One day HOWLEY per-
formed so well as to receive a compliment from Ms tutor. As they
were coining away from the tutor's chamber, SHERLOCK, who was
probably a little nettled, called ow. " Bow, you have made good
use of L•Farawton's translation te-day I"—" No, Ton.," replied
110ADLILV. " I have it Rot; and I forgot to send the bed-maker to
borrow yours, whieh I am Web the only one In r.ollege." *So
earl) did the emulation between these two great men commence.
In most of the houses at Inspnsek there are on the roofs a sort
of balconies, for the purpose of drying linen. When much of this
happens to be hanging up, a' d if the wind Mows, just at the
instant that the traveller catches a distant view of the place, be
might almost imagine it to be a sailing town.

A abort time since an innkeeper in a noted borough in one
of the wedeln counties (not too miles from the metropolis)
exchanged a horse, of o loch ha bad been the owner npwards
of four years, for another, and gave a sum of money to boot.
About ten days -afterwards be rode In Marlborough on his
newly acquired bleed, when (it being market day) @incest
horses a ere art out for sale, oats of which caught his atten •
lion, and lie immediately proposed that an exchange should
be made, which was agreed to. On this occasion he wet to
revive some malt for equality of exchange. Quite elated with
his success, he rode home, and calling the ogler, he thus ad-
dressed him :—" Here, John, take this horse into the stable,
and be careful that he does not knock his thighs against the
wall. I never rode a liner boast in my life. 1 hare returned
from Marlborough in 40 minutes less lime than I ever did be-
fore. " Oh" ! quoth the ostler, " I'll warrant him he'll find
'the stable if you let him go." By this time his wife had mime
out in order to see the horse and sill gh it was by candle
light instantly recognised it be the one he had originally
bartered away. "Oh ! dear, Mr. K—," she exclaimed,
" bow glad lam sou hare brought the old horse home again—
' how pleased youi mortber will he to sae him."—" /Ice him !"
replied he, vilest do you mesa ".-." Why," rejoined the
ashler, " it he the old horse you parted with the other dm,"
and to convince his master it was so released him, wben-he
walked to the stable apparently guile pleased. Still he 11,-
1 sidled on it It was a difereet horse, sad to prove that he ass
right sent fur a veterinary Burgin*, who bad a short lime
since tired the horse, when to the host's unspeakable 'asto-
nishment be declared it to be the sansm as he recognised his
own work. •Mr. K— has sine* endeavoured to impress his
neighbours with an idea that be knew too hors, at the time be
purchased it. How improlsottle.

•
A horse-dealer exhibiting e horse yesterday for
shear in Smithfield market, the animal fell, and the
rider had his leg broken below the knee. He was
immediately carried in a oink sei a surgeon.

ViSTNINSTEIi SCHOOL.

PROLOGUE

.
SPOIZI WY NIL BENNITf.

Pinlum *beat scene lusus—peucisque morelur
Vos, greano rursum que capit, ipso dooms.
Chute Arius, nuns et sera veneranda senecla eat
Nunc adeo Metric nomine &pa coli
Quid fasten ego commemorcm ; et labentibus annis
Felici•Jam bin lustre permit' deeem
Limen ut intrarit, vcsirum uniisquisque rerolvit
Wee atrium steam, dinumeraique memor—
Ecquis adeAt T earn roc pueri spati um omnc notastis,
Neo fiches agnoscit quse fuit ante, Laris
Nam torpere situ queritur tri.tique vetemo ?
Consueti deeoris num quid abesee, dolet ?
Se laquear nisi (rod nimio candore modestum
Elnit, et paries rulnera honest& gerit—
At not effete vire, non vincitur rem
Ptuilatim, nut diunnis in sua beta ruit ;
Slat Fortuna domui ; Veter is quin conscia Fame *it?
Quin viget accept us mos, Oeniusque loci !
Leine adeo Studiis isdem (et speramus alumnos
Hand ita degcnares), tingit Eliza silos—
Nos Miens ingenti Muses Sectemur amore
Juogit adbue, quamvis seuiula, corda tides—
Mena egere stque peti jam none assueta, Viral
Jam nunc eacolit ueiqua licet apta loge—
Moribes hist:dim Patriam et virtutibusauzit
His Patriam augcbit selva Palaestra ousel.
Tradita enim nos trademus—ventursque proles
laicism bac noses par debit orta domo.