Northern Times.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1857-08-18 00:00:00

THE WHITEBAIT.

It is a long lane that has no turning. There is no
session without its whitebait. Other rescues may be
denied, other solaces may fall, but as sure as salmon
swarms up the Tay, so surely do whitebait come up to
Greenwich, and equally sure is it hat certain statesmen
go down to that trysting place. Ministers may fall, but
we have not yet seen the degraded cabinet that failed to
close the session in the season—of course we mean the
whitebait season. This is the essential point ; other
questions are comparatively trivial. Lord Palmerston
did not make a cabinet question of the Oaths Bi'l.
Whether or not Baron Lionel de Rothschild takes
the oaths and his seat. is a matter of secondary
account, so that neither his stopping nor his
sitting hinders the little voyage to Greenwich.
The Chancellor may or may not carry his bills for the
consolidation of the criminal law—he could talk about
them at all events ; but the point is, that he shall " dispose
of' them before a certain day in August. We may or ma y
not settle matters with the United State in Central America
—may or may not drift into a peace or a war ; ministers
must take their chawce of that, for it is not an essential
question, Lord Palmerston would still b? prime minister
though the star-spangled banner were hauled down in Port-
land-place and Liverpool freights were swamped in the
charge for insurance. The prie.) of tea may depend ou the
Chinese war ; but ministerial stock scarcely rises an d
falls by tht reports from Canton. Juiced they have
carried all their chief points already. Tney may have
Parted to our China trade an adventurous riskful charac
ter, but they have maintained their Sir J. Bo wring. Bengal
Sepoys may mutiny, and may occasion a great deal ()-
trouble to the Horse Gaards and the War Depart:nent

which is vexatious enough; but the gentlemen in there
departments have always proved equal to the writing
duties cast upon them, and there is nothing in their
present labours which has occasioned the slightest
uneasiness as to the date of the whitebait dinner. The
only thing which really threatened it was the fuss about
the Divorce Bill ; but the show of spirit promises to over-
come the hindrance—if at the sacrifice of a clause, an
Attorney-General, or other trifle. Her Majesty's oppo-
sition quite understands the etAue7te, and shares the
vested interest in an August adjournment.
Gay and agreeable as it is, however, invention has been
a little racked of late years to impart some variety to the
whitebait dinner. It does become a little tedious always
to meet exactly the same people, who have the very same
mole of entering a room—some of them for almost half a
century. In order to diversify this stan linsc meeting of
the Right Hon Brown;Jones, and Robinson, hy the Right
Honourable Robinson, Brown, and Jon's, various little
sportive incidents have becn thrown in. The last inven-
tion was the tnug—t penny mug given to that member
who had most distinguishrd himself by his assiduity in
attendance. This year some unauthorised fellow has
thrown out the idea of another variety ; it is proposed to
award:the snug, not for the mechanical victory of the
best attendaace, but for the more intellectual feat of giving
the best answer to an opponent.

For this prize there are almost as many candidates a,
members of the party ; and it must be confessed that
they all deserve well of their country. There is, for
example, Mr. Vernon Smith, who, when government is
called to account for being surprised by the Senoy,,,
calmly replies that the man who should have foreseen the
event that has happened would have been called a
visionary or a madman. If there is any question how far
Mr. Vernon Smith's wit in these replies is voluntary or
otherwise, there is Mr. Osborne, who is always answering
opponents with surprising smartness; only that Mr
Osborne shows up his friends as well as the enemy. lie
has made the roof of the Admiralty illustrious for
exposing the court of the Horse Guards, and has in turn
exposed himself and his simple-minded advocacy of the
Election Petitions Bill to a very telling reply from Sir
George Grey, for his forgetfulness of practical sense in
election matters. P erhaps the best answer yet given, this
session, was levelled at Mr. Osborne and his Election
Petitions enthusiasm ; it consisted in the appointment
of Mr. Coppock to an easy post of handsome emoluments
—a very witty stroke at the Secretary of the Admiralty.
There is no denying the claims of Lord Granville .
but he has only had to beat off opponents like Lord
Derby. Lord Ellenbornugh, or Lord Harrowby—
mere peers ; and nothing that Lord Granville has
said in the way of reply has been halt so stinging as
the silent eloquence of Harrowby's stopping away on the
-oaths question. Then there is Sir Charles Wood, who,
when people complained that the home squadron was not

at home, answered pointedly that it had gone to China.
" You cannot see the fL et" says Tilburina, " because it is

not in sight." When ti;ey rejoined that the absence of the
home squadron left our coast defenceless, did not Sir
Charles bring up the clenching surrejoinder, that invadmm
squadrons are always preceded by diplomatic notes ?
We used to rely upon " wooden walk," "hearts of oak,"
and that sort of thing; but the British Admirality of our
day has given anew turn to "Rule, Britannia."
Where there are so many claimants it is difficult to
decide ; and yet somebody must have the mug. Besides,
one claimant has been omitted. Who has so cleverly
managed, almost for the whole session, to exorcise the
Roebuck ? Who has induced Lord John Russell to refer
himself, Rothschild, and Oaths, to a select committee?
Who has brought about the posture of affairs which has
set Henley against Disraeli, Bentinck against Pakington ?
Who but the Master of the Revels ? Already he has had
G.C.B. added after his name ; more recently, the still
higher augmentive R.G ; and the wit of the whitebait
add the coveted but Merited
feast, it is said proposers t 9
G.M.— Spe4tator.,,i