The British Press; or, Morning Literary Advertiser.
London, England, 1824-08-20 00:00:00

SINGULAR AFFAIR.

A ludicrous rencontre, which excited considerable nierrimenl
took place in St. Martin's-lane, between a young tar, "just come
home from sea," and an old Greenwich pensioner, who it appeared
had performed a most dishonourable part during the absence of the
former individual.
It appeared that the youthful son of Neptune, about two years
ago, was called into the active service of his country, and not only
necessitated to quit his " native home," but that which was more
sear to him than his existence, a lovely and amiable wife, whom
ha had taken to himself but a very short time previously to hie me-
kocholy separation. Jack, however, endeavoured to keep up Ida
spirits, and also to convince his rib, that although they were
obliged to separate, they still could prove true to each other I and
prior to starting from the Docks, mutual vows were exchanged to
that effect, and, according to his account, he kept his watereyes
upon his love until distance precluded her and "Old Empanel"
from his view. Notwithstanding, Jack consoled himself with the
idea of once more meeting with a friend in London, on his return
after a prosperous voyage. This did not, however, turn out to be
the ease, and after an absence for the above period, he returned to
his native shore, where he discovered the girl of his heart"
selling apples and pears at the corner of Chandos.street, to which
place he repaired, with all the speed that nature supplied him with, I
until he gave one joyous glance at the sweet girl, who met him with
cordial attachment. Mutual inquiries took flatlet but Jack's alto-
nislunent may be easily imal,ined when his wife refused to intro.
duce him to her home, and on ascerudning where she lived, he dis-
covered that en old pensioner, upwards of 70 yews oi age, had been
cohabiting with his frail rib during the lest twelve months, and a
most wretched life they had led, quarrelling and threatening tomtit.-
der each other all day. Jack soon gave the old one " warning to
quit," but received his wife again under his protection, after proles-
sions of love, and that distress drove her to the necessity of loving
the pensioner, for the sake of his 201. a year ; and on this excuse be
consented to join his wife's humble calling, and became master of
the •• fruiterer's shop." But what must be the audacity of the
pensioner, when he proceeded to Jack, whilst sitting by the apples
and pears and asked fur a aperth of pears. Jack replied, ~We
doesn't deice aperths, so tratrek" (leave.) " Well," rejoined the
pensioner, "if you don't make a aperth, gi' us a pennerth." Jack
determined not to serve him ; and conceiving this to be a direct
insult, after the manner in which lie had treated him and his wife,
gave him one or two a la Crib, while the old son of Neptune de- ,
tended himself with a stick, and the crowd began to abuse Jack for
ill-treating the old man, without knowing the cause, and he was
pelted with apples, pears, and currants, until he was taken into cus-
tody and carried before the Magistrate at Bow-street, where their
quarrel was discussed to die no small amusement of a crowded
Court. •
The pensioner cut a very aukward appearance in the presence of
his Worship, while Jack won all the laurels. The pensioner swore
he loved the girl dearly; Jack swore he loved end- would cherish
her better than '• such an old —;" and the inconstant fair one,
with a look of indignation, spurned the old one, and vowed to
" love, honour, and obey her lawful husband until death," and
Jack was erg-pitied honourably.
Mr. :MIN SII U I. t. desired hint not to strike the fellow again.
Jack replied, that he'd take his Worship's advice; he riemteeed
what he'd gen him (a black eye), and he cold lick twenty on 'em."