Northern Times.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1859-12-26 00:00:00

THE PANTOMIME AT THE THEATRE
ROYAL.

The grand 'Christmas pantomime at the Theatre Royal
will be produced this evening: The dialogue and geueral
plan of the entertainment. are from-the polished pen of
Our townsman, Mr.,Charles-Milward. Its pungency of
joke
.its literary merits, and its general design will be
•gathered from the subjoined text. The.additions which
it will receive in scenic effect, and, by the adaptation
of stage mechanism and properties, mast be watched,
as no doubt they will be, by hundreds—indeed thousands
Of anxious .and trusting plcasure-seckers, who rely on
the sagacityof Mr. Copeland in catering for their delecta-
tion, and papa no.less confidence in the skill of the
artistes and-the employe's. The title of the pantomime
is—

LITTLE .SNOW WHITE ; OR, HARLEQUIN,
PRINCE GOLDENHEART, AND THE. FAIR
MAIDEN WHO NEVER SAW HER FACE IN
A GLASS.

SCENE • I-THE ABODE 'OF THE BUSY-BODIES
AND MODEL FARM OF LABOUR.

INvmrrioN••=.-Tiirte was when Folly, with his cap and
bells,
Roamed as a nlonarch here, where Labour dwells,
And in his train were troopsnf merry elves,
Whose boast was, all were foolish as themselves.
Those were the "days" of the Araian " Nights,"
When authors revelled in their first delights.
But lo ! how changed, folks now have grown so wise,
That they will not be taken by surprise.
Conclusions are so "jumped at" in these days,
That nothing in the world excites amaze. •
Old thoughts and fanuies, once so fraught with. joy,
Would now be scouted by the simplest boy,
And laughter is doled out, as though it lent
A grinning sanction to its banishment.
But something must be done, and quickly too;
As old schemes fail we'll find one that is new.
Necessity and custom here demand
A festive offering from fairy land.
Our garden of romance, and love also, •
The produce. of its labour must bestow. •
To banish care and trouble for awhile,
And light each anxious 'visage with a smile.
Sounds of labour proceed from the hives.
What noisy work can Labour be about ?
As-he's "at home" I perhaps may "find him out."
Within these hives are Labour's busy hacks,
Making the air ring as. they make their "whacks." •
Amidst such din 'twere vain for me to shout,
.This strike, however, shall make Ilis.-men turn out."
[Strikes,the.nearest hive, and LABOUR appears from. it.
LABOUR—What would you have ?
INVENTION-- A fairy tale ! . ,
LABOITR— You jest !
Such things for Labour have no interest. -
My skill is now more urgently required, '
By men -with noble patriotisni-fired.
INvEN'rioN-e-Indeed ! Pray who are they ? -
LAnovn-,- Our 'Volunteers
Volunteers,
Whose courage calms a timid nation's fears.
Invasion /fames have increased of late,
Filling with terror ninny an empty pate;
•But loyal bands, inspired by war's alarms,
Have rushed, with martial rdour, to their arms.
Oar noble corps of Volunteers now•stand,
A wall of " livireeee-,bricks," to guard our land.
INVENTION—r;ur fears are groundless.
LABOUR— Oh, we're not alarmed,
But still, "to forearned'i to be forearmed."
w
Our citizens enjoy the sport: The fact is,-
We're all the better for this rifle practice.
We don't want war, it ruins honest labour,
But we must be as watchful as oar neighbour.
No foe shall find, who ventures near our coast,
The British /ion sleeping at his.pest.
INVENTION---No fear of that; so, as for time I'm
pressed, • • •
We'll leave the noble beast in "guarded rest."
Disrliss your warlike'notiOns for the present,
And aid me in a labour far more pleasant.. •
Our fairy fields, 'few_ fair fields 'offer now,
For 'fiction's puzzled labourers, to plough.
LAnourt—lndeed.!' I've no idea,
INVENTION— All that I know .
And yet ideas from Labour ought to flow;
The arts are guided by your sturdy will,
And science owes to you its_wend'reas skill.
works, though suiting a progressive.age,
Are not, like yours, adapted to the stage.
Not much of fiction ours, you must admit,
But some of them haVe lately Made "a hit ;"
Producing wonders; which no fairy wand
Could conjure up, in your enchanted land.
A noble ocean monarch they haVe throned, '
Where Albion's proud.''snpreinacy is owned ;
In vain old Father Neptune storms and raves, -
For our Great Eastern steam-ship rules the *ayes.
A lightning wire, wrought by these.willing hands
Spreads,peace and 'Ogress' throlighout many landl ;
And, soon, completing What was well began-,
The broad Atlantic it will' once more span.
Where busy commerce speeds its
.goiden way, •
And' active trade maintains its' healthful 'sway' • •
In fact, wherever industry is'
The artisans' of Labour are, well known.
why, -on earth, can you have'
such aversion
' •To practice incluStry for our diversion ?
LAsounTay, sister, be'not-angry, for close by
DiYells a good fairy, who can-soon supply •
The 'story you require. I'll lead you to her;
• ;And, as.she courts the Mans, you can woo her.
'_Her aid, in a geed catfse, is always granted.
INVENTION—If you Present me, I shall be enchanted.
LAnoun—Agreed. Step in avid taste our Honeydew.
lervEetrioN--eWith pleasure, Labour. (Makes way
for LABOUR to precede her)

LABOUR (bowing)— -‘ Oh; miss, aftOr you.

Exeunt.
SCENE 11—THE PALACE OF-KING SQUANDER
IN TAR REALMS OF .EXTRAVAGANCE.
Entrance of KING, SQuarinmand his. Court. -
KlNG—Slaves of my will, good morrow. How d'ye
do?
FLINTYHEAD—Oh, jolly, gracious liege. Pray how
are you ?
KING—" I'm not myself at all." But why com-
plain.?
Our " loss," from you, no sympathy will "gain ; "
Whate'er our wants, not one of you is willing
To To aid his " heavy sovereign " with a " shilling."
FLINTYHAD—The exchequer, sire, is low.
KING— 'Tis ever so.
When kings are needy, funds are always low.
But something, soon, our subjects must pay down,
If they refuse, we are not worth a "crown."
So closely kept are corporate accounts,
We cannot reckon well on their amounts.
Our absent town dues have been missed of late,
And we can't borrow on a.borough rate.
For lack of money we can't rate the docks,
And folks abuse us if we stop the clocks. •
Therefore we must assess each folly new— • •
Peg•tops, crinoline, " Hoop-de-doo-den-doo."
FLINTYHEAD" All the year round" this revenue
we'll seek,
And tax collectors shall call " once a week."
KING—The "needful" we must have, so look about it,
We are " hard up," and cannot do without it ;
If people grumble, or complainings utter,
Give them "soft soap," orlielly's yellow butter; •
And promise them, to quell their agitation,
A Derby•banquet, or a Bright oration.,
[Music without. Flourish.,
What noise is that ? What means that horrid drumming ?
FLINTYHEAD—Our high and mighty. Queen is this
way coming. [Muslc.
Enter QUEEN SCYLLWON and PRINCESS FADEANGON,
attended by the lioN. MISS JOLLIROUNDABOUT, the
HON. MISS STRAIGHTITPANDDOWN, and attendants.
QUEEN—These servants are the greatest plagues i
life.

KlNG—(aside)—Not greater, surely, than a scolding
wife.
QUEEN—Comparisons are odious ; but did you ever
Behold so great a contrast ? (pointing to maids of honour.)
KING— No, I never !
QuEEN—Observe this minx's habits ; she will wear
them.
As to the other one's, I cannot bear them.
Their constant quarrels all our tinie possess,
We must appeal to fashion for redress. •
THE HON. Miss JOLLIROUNDABOUT—
'Twas fashion introduced this style of dress,
Eugenia wears it, and I can't do less.
THE HON. Miss STRAIGTEPANDOWN—.
I hate it. Nature's dress is loveliness,
The dress I wear, is that, I rather guess,
And well I know Eugenia's last decree,
From such monstrosities our sex sets free.
KING—If• custom clings to it, we'll shortly know
To what great lengths and breadths, such things can
This beauteous maid, on our gay son, you know,