The Press.
London, England, 1854-06-17 00:00:00

564

FINANCIAL REFORM.

(a la GLADSTONE and WiLsoN.)

Old Liberty's cap, tho' twas worn in the nap,
Since the famed Robespierre did " free measures" begin,
Served the Whigs, it appears, for these fifty long years,
A banner when out and a nightcap when in.
But, since Coalition has changed their condition,
No more for taxation or tyrants they fear ;
Fortunatus's now is the cap on their brow,
When Greville but " wishes" five hundred a year.

Poor curates so meek, for some shillings a week,
Who teach the taxed populace peace and content ;
Poor surgeons who strive to keep paupers alive,
Poor clerks who are dock'd of the new three per cent.,
Poor widows who look to the dividend-book,
Old ladies who Gladstone and Nicholas fear,
Your spirits don't sink! What a comfort to think
Of Mr. Fulk Greville's five hundred a year !

Of course you have found many penee in the pound
The butcher has added to mutton and beef ;
That the grocer declares he has lost on his wares,
And raises his charges with genuine grief ;
That the baker from crumbs to geography comes,
And tells you Odessa the quartern makes dear.
" Thank Wilson !" you say, as each new bill you pay,
" Mr. G.'s got a further five hundred a year."

Thank Gladstone's good sense that, to save the expense
Of a Common Pleas action, this project he saw,*
For think of the cost that the nation had lost
If Greville had sued Mr. Wilson at law !
Per mare per terra: his services were, as
Each role (when well paid) he assumed without fear ;
When from council to sea like Raleigh went he,t
Can you grudge Mr. Greville five hundred a year ?
• "In this way a positive title had been conferred upon Mr. Greville to receive the
increased salary, and the title was of such a nature that it could have been recovered by
judicial proceedings."—Speech of Mr. Gladstone.
+ Mr. Greville was" Naval Officer of Trinidad," and if he was not compensated for
that doubtless important office he ought to have been.

THE POET AND THE PLACEMAN.
" How changed since that morn ! " cries our young Ignoramus,
When Byron awoke and found himself famous.
Now Strutt in a night, 'midst derision and shout,
Awakes with a yawn and finds himself—our.

AN IMPROMPTU ON AN " IMPROMPTU."
"Sir, the hon. member for Manchester has appealed to me in such strong though
courteous terms that I cannot refrain from addressing the house."—Speech of Sir W.
Molosworth on the Ballot.

A miracle undoubted read !
For human art could ne'er aspire,
Even aided by galvanic wire,
To rival MOLZSWORTH'S lightning speed.
Ere BRIGHT had ceased, whose sudden call
Demanded that " impromptu " speech,
Six copies, fairly written all,
By magic sleight the " gallery " reach!
Flimsy thoughts on " flimsy " see !
Who could think such things could be
In an instant writ so plain ?
ROGER BACON'S come again !
PALMERSTON in vain may say
"Away with nonsense!" and " away !"
That eloquence cannot be broken
Which prints impromptus 'ere they're spoken?

THE LORD PRESIDENT'S INAUGURATION
SPEECH.

A CABINET MEET ING was held on Thursday last, in Downing-street, to
receive the inaugural address of the new Lord President of the
Council. The whole of the Cabinet Ministers were present.

The LORD PRESIDENT, having taken his seat amid partial applause,
rose and said :
MY LORDS AND GENTLEMEN,
It is unnecessary for me to enter at any length into a considera-
tion of the motives which have led me, after trying nearly all the
chairs in the room, to select this one for my ultimatum. I have had
.may Lord Palmerston's seat, the Duke of Newcastle's, my Lord
Clarendon's, and my Lord Aberdeen's, and I have also sat at the
council, like a cherub, without the de quoi, when merely leader of the
:House of Commons. Each position has its advantages and its
troublasi and I dare say this one will be like the rest in that respect.

SATURDAY,

I am accused of violating the rule which makes it necessary that
the holder of this office should be a peer. (Sir CHARLES NVooD: A
President is above a precedent. Ha! ha !) lam obliged to my
honourable and Indian friend for that extrication from the dilemma,
but I fear I cannot accept it. Two letters are not enough for my
reputation.

Lord PALMERSTON : I remember when one was ; but then it went
to Durham. (Applause.)

Lord J. RUSSELL : The Noble Lord's aggression is uncalled for. I
was about, my lords and gentlemen, to justify the course I have taken,
but, upon reflection, it perhaps needs no justification. I have made
this sacrifice—
Sir C. Wool): Sacrifice!

Lord J. RUSSELL (sarcastically) : The Right Hon. Baronet does
not appear to know the meaning of the word. I will explain it to
him. When India--

Sir C. Woon : I know what you are going to say. India—
suttees—burning alive. Ah ! but Lord George Bentinck, I think, put
all those sacrifices down ; so you see I'm up in history, Ha ! ha!
Lord J. RUSSELL (continuing, emphatically): When India was
handed over to the tender mercies of the Right Hon. Baronet, that
was a sacrifice. Now does he comprehend?

Sir C. WOOD (sulkily) : It is bad enough to be told so in every
other despatch. You might make things pleasant here.
Lord J. RUSSELL : That I might do so, I accepted this office, and
I am desirous that my intentions should be recognised. For, my
lords and gentlemen, there can be no doubt that a certain Ministry
was until last week in about as precarious a condition as ever was
Administration in this country. Out of seven Government measures,
three withdrawn, three defeated, and one entirely transformed at the
dictation of our antagonists, and a House of Commons so far losing
its respect for us as to beat us once a night as regularly as the night
came. Add to this that the nation believed—never mind what I
believed—that the war, the only thing for which we were tolerated,
was being carried on without energy or prudence, and that indeed the
head of the Cabinet discouraged vigorous proceedings against his
friends in Russia.

Lord PALMERSTON : And, for once, the nation was right. But why
do you speak in the preterite tense? Are you a bit better off this
week than you were last, and has the spectacle of a couple of Cabinet
Ministers assailing one another on the ballot question strengthened
you so mightily? " Away with your cant and nonsense," cried Ito
Molesworth. " Old stock-in-trade arguments," answered Molesworth
to me. And then a lot of Ministers going into one lobby, and a lot
more into the other! I don't see how you have mended your game.
Lord J. RUSSELL: The Noble Lord is blinded by his prejudices, or
he would see that the whole state of affairs is changed. Lord Aber.
deen is still the nominal head of the Ministry, but the Lord President
of the Council is its real head, and, when the House and the nation
see that office held by the individual who now fills it, I am disposed
to think that there will be a new manifestation of confidence.

Lord PALMERSTON (laughing): I think that there has been one.
Lord .T. RUSSELL : I understand; but my well-grounded convictions
of my own utility to the country are not to be shaken by a sneer. I
repeat that I have taken this seat in order to save the Ministry, and
not out of any personal ambition. I suppose that a Russell need not
oe proud of doing anything that a Granville can do.
Sir J. GRAHAM : If you could speak French as well as Granville
does, you would have spared the Ambassadors some amusement when
you were in the Foreign-office. But that's nothing. I only wish to
observe, if you have done, that, if I do not express any distrust from
your estimate of the value of the step you have taken, it is not be-
cause I assent to that estimate.

Lord PALMERSTON : I wish to be agreeable ; and I only say that if
Lord John Russell, who thinks with me about the Russian war, has
taken this office, and brought in George Grey, in order to counteract
the mischievous influence of—of—those who don't think as we do, I
consider it a wise step.
The Duke of NEWCASTLE : The war is in my hands, and nobody
has any business to take it into consideration at all ; and therefore
that part of the question goes for nothing. I confess that 1 think a
peer ought to have had the place of Lord President, and that, if Lord
John Russell desired it, he should have qualified himself by accepting
a peerage.
Lord J. RUSSELL : Mind your war. Who was to lead the
Commons ?

Sir C. Wool) : 0 ! I would have done that. Yes, I think you
ought to be a peer, Russell. You are fond of the Constitution—call
yourself Lord Runnymede, from the place where the Bill of Rights
was signed by Henry the Eighth at the Restoration.
The CHANCELLOR of the EXCHEQUER: Whether Lord Russell was
right in taking this office, or those are right who think precedent
should have been heeded, is a question which may be more advan-
tageously considered at another time ; but there can be no doubt that
the object with which he avows himself to have accepted it is open to
a discussion which there are various reasons for both commencing and
postponing, and I would, therefore, suggest that we pass to the other
business before us.
The Duke of ARGYLL : I want to say a word. As to strengthening
the Ministry, that is nonsense. lam in the Ministry. As to giving
Lord John a peerage, that is nonsense. lam in the House of Lords.
I think that if you had offered me the conduct of the war I should
have surprised you; but, as you have not done so, the responsibility
rests with yourselves.