The Dorset County Express and Agricultural Gazette.
Dorchester, Dorset, England, 1859-06-14 00:00:00

Yaritties.

An Irish paper, reporting the loas of a steamer, sap:
—" The captain swain ashore ; so did the stewardess.
She was insured for £5,000, and loaded with pigs.
RUNNING AND flotriNo.—First the Derby then the
Luncheon. In the former the race is to the Swift ;
the second to the swallow.—Pitneh.

---•• • -
THE WHOLE DUTT or NECTRALTTT.—" I never
says nuffen to nobody, and when I says a thing I always
does it.— Aisoot.—Pousek.
TILE PROCTOR Or RUGHT SCHOOL AT FAX:LT.—A.
few evening's ago a hoax was played upon this func-
tionary, which is too good to be kept secret. It is the
fashion with the boarders to wear straw hats, and each
house keeps to a peculiar kind of trimming ; but
es there is no law to prevent non-members of the
school from choosing their own embellishuients,
a portion of the members of the " Mutual In-
struction Society" have adopted the trimming
of the chief boarding-house. Three of the " mu-
tual'," the other evening. were holding a " con-
fab" in School-street, after the calling-irebell had
, ceased tolling, when one of them noticed the Proctor of
' the school who appeared to be particularly struck with
the ribbon on their hats. 'They then moved on, as
though they would shun him, but he was not to be
walked over like that, and followed hard in their wake.
Just before turning the first corner, one of the trio. no
turning his head, saw the ruse bad taken effect, as the
Proctor was mending his is/We to something like ill
knots an hour. They then commenced running triter-
skelter, and bad the gratification to find that the Proctor
was pursuing then, at full speed. Upon reaching the
Market-plane they ran towards the School-house, where,
after turning the corner, they halted nearly out of breath
from fatigue and laughter. Up came the Proctor
at a beautiful pace, which, however, proved rattier too
much for him, the more in as the run had been little
short of • mile. His was soon up to the game, which
till now. Ise verily believed belonged to his own pre-
serves, and he had just wade the discovery that he bad
been running • wild goose chase, when one of the
" mutual." commenced singing " All round my hat." Of
course neither of the parties knew that there had been
anything up • and the Proctor, in passing them to pro-
ceed on his nocturnal rounds, said, ' It's very war*.
gentlemen '." to which one of the "mutuals" replied,
" Rather ; particularly after exerting oneself."
TH6 ENTELLV6 MOSILET.—CouId we, with electric
celerity, convey the reader, with the promise of bringing
him back as speedily, to India. what strange spectacles
of animal nature might he instantly behold! he
looked from his palanquin, he might see at the road-
side, and at only a ow yards' distance, a seue of
monkeys—seine sitting, perhaps, on the grass. "11.
delighting to take the air—others sauntering about sow
though the elders might be decidedly ugly, the females.
with babies in their arms, would have at least a kindly
aspect. Proceeding further into the jungle, the number
of these creatures would be multiplied by hundreds. le
is here that the monkey appears doing all that instinct
demands, not only for his own well-being, Out for that
of his family, and others of his tribe. Here his know-
ledge and experience prove truly valuable. He a
acquainted with every sugar-cane field that be can W
preach with safety', he appears to know, also, when b°
can regale himself from the juicy cups of certain Ws'
gems, and from fruits when they are just ripening to his
taste ; and even when the rain has disappeared. os/
dry weather has set in. he goes hither and thither to
' seek and enjoy his looked -for banquet. Bangalore,*
city of Mysore, is completely hidden by a derse gm"'
' which stretches round it, and is penetrated at different
points by roads leading to the gates. This grove is osid
to boa" perfect metropolis of monkeys." fiwarining in
t thousands, they chase each other on the roads, coPe,r "",
the hedges, chatter on the boughs, grin hunifri'Y '""
every one who passes with any eatable, and are •or
stant pest to every housewife in the city, diacoveti,„l4
unsuspected passages to her larder, forestallinCte
meat, and after rioting in the spoil, making • wee'
retreat. Among the monkeys of India, the Entellr
holds an extraordinary place. This animal is of •w'
form ashy grey on the upper parts, becoming darter cm
the tail, which is grepsh brown, of equal thicket.
throughout, and terminated by a few long hairs tanning
out into a kind of point, but not forming a tuft.
under surface of the body is of a dingy yellowish white'
and the fore-anus, hands, and feet are of a dusky bl,'
The fingers of both extremities are very long. and "'"
thumb+ comparatively short. The face, which is black,
with somewhat of a violet tinge, is surmounted
the eyebrows by a line of long, stiff, black hairs whist',
project forwards and slightly upwards. On tbe sides s
the cheeks, and beneath the chin, the Entelhis h*"
beard of greyish white, passing along the fine of the,
jaws, and extending upwards in front of the ears. wh'e°
are large and prominent, and of the same colour as the
face. The hairs of the fore part of the head eppear
diverge from a common centre. The height of en
Entellus described by F. reeler, was about one foot 6"
I inches; the length of the tail was about two feet.
CaaselCs Popular Natural History.
Eta:earn) Mice.—" My own earliest pet was a moose
caught in my schoolboy days, and highly educated. it
that particular school we were all mouse tamers.
first process was conducted on the water-curs principk.
breaking the wild spirit of independence by letting the
mice swim till they were tired. After the preparatorl
isnmersion had been undergone, their education wø
conducted on principles of decided kindness. Our Dere
knew :sod would come to us like dogs, and were 17104
docile and teachable. I grieve to have to confess that
in a moment of extreme poverty I disposed of In
• admirable Crichton' of ss mouse for the unheard-of lion
of five-shillings. 'Toby' (that was his nanie) was *
genius, knew his name, came to the whistle, leapt. re°
up poles. opened doors, shouldered arms, ko. In the
course of their education our mios often got bed falls.
and the pharmacy we adopted in these cases is not the
least curious part of inouseology. The feinting sufferer
was phlebotomised by cutting off • link off his tail with •
sharp knife; the drop of blood which followed this pro-
cess generally brought the patient round. A verf
accomplished mouse might have been known by the
shortness of his tail, as the senior wrangler may often be
distinguished at the universities by the beldam of his
forehead. Apropos of mice. I remember 'marine of an
English °Meer in • smart wahine being introduced due-
We short pesos to Hepatitis the First at the Tull-
es ' Capital.. dee Souris.' The Illaporor could
Dot at list solve the problem of the I.gli.b mice
req•irbig • socessandisi alias till it Wm ozpisinont
to bus that the diem mai • argbda is the Marra
Yecimary r