The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1872-03-30 00:00:00

A SCENE IN AN EDITOR'S SANCTUM.

The Philadelphia Dispatch gives the follow lug humorous
sketch

A week or two ago one of our reporters had occasion
to refer to a certain woman, whom we will call Hannah
Smith, as a denizen of the Eleventh Ward. A day or
two afterwards, a huge man entered the office with his
brow clothed with thunder. In his hand he carried
fearful club, and at his side trotted a bull-dog, whom
hunger evidently had made desperate. With that
quick appreciation of situation which is creditable to
the superior intelligence of educated men, the editor of
this paper and the proprietors dashed to the window,
climbed outside, slid down the lightning rod, and went
acro6g the street to watch the bloody Lay through a
spy-glass. With the fearlessness of conscious inno-
cence we sat still, merely inserting our legs in two
sections of stove-pipe, to gusril against the mis-
apprehension of facts on the part of the bull-dog.

_
The man with the club approached. "Are you the
editor ?" he asked, spitting oil his band and grasping
his club.

We told him that the editor was out; that he hol
gone to the North Pole with Captain Hull, and that he
would not return before 1876, in time for the centenaial
celebration.

Are you the proprietor?" asked the man.
We explained to him that we were not. That the
proprietors were also out; that they hail gone to
South America for the purpose of investigating the
curative powers of cunduraugo ; and they expected
to remain there for several years.
"Well, whoever you are," exclaimed the warrior,
"my name is Smith!"
We told him we were glad; because, if there was
one thing better than the possession of the name of
Smith, it was the privilege of knowing a man of that
name. "But, Smith," we said, "why this battle
array? It is absurd for a man to put on his panopely
of war and frisk into editors' sanctums fumbling a
club and accompanied by a disheartening bull-dog,
simply because Ms name happens to be Smith."
He said he called in to burst the head of the man
who had insulted his sister.

"It is impossible, Smith, that Finch a thing could
i have been done by any one n this office."
"In it? but it was, though; and her name wan
published tou--Miss Smith—Mice Homier Smitn."
"May v-e he yernettel Mr. Smith,
what we' the racism character of the aff'ront offered to
Hannah?"

.• We'd you see," said Smith, "the blackguard said
ehe was n Lnizen. And I want you to understand "
exclaimed Smith. becoming excited, akd brandishii:g
Lis club in a wil I manlier over our hew], while the bull-
dog advanced and commenced to sniff up seal down our
stove-pipe, "I want you to understand that she is a
decent young weal= with a good character, and none
of your denizens ;old such truck. The man who says
she is a denizen is a blackguard and thief, and 111
smash hiin over the nose if I get a chance. They may
eay what they please abut me; but, the man who
abuses my sister has got to suffer." And Smitti struck
the table in a violent MaTir cc with his club, while the
bull-dog puthis fore-legs on the back of our ihair.
We pacified Smith with a dictionary. We pointed
out to that 'aging warrior that the Webirterian defini-
thm of the word "denizen" gives such a person an on-
offending character, and deprives the term of anything
like repiorch. Smith skid he wrs satisfied, and he
sleek hato'n cud kicked the b di-dog down st,iire.
The editor and proprictors, Fecing that all was cafe,
imracrlistely ciimbel die lightning-r 4, and soon ap-
eared at the window. where they were introdu.,ed to
Lith, with the retried: that they had returned from
the, North Pole and tim clime of inn cundurango some-
what unexpectedly, in
order eurpriee their relet lOW%
And bow we suppose Smith will he mad, becauee we
have told this !dory about him, and he will be coming
down to interview no again in war's magnificently
stern array, with a fresh bull-dog. But it will be in
vain. We have rented an office in the top of the shot
tower, and have planted toipedoes and sp
all the way up the stairs. We warn this
Smith to be aware,

spring-guns
inceudisry