The Dorset County Express and Agricultural Gazette.
Dorchester, Dorset, England, 1880-01-20 00:00:00

"ilasheo anb glicktro."

We were exceedingly pleased with the bell-ringing on
the occasion of the marriage reported above. (sampan.
°logy is evidently a science within the reach of thesinewy
hands and harmonious ears of our ropullere. If our
generous churchwarden would hut add to the number
of our brazen throats in the ancient tower it would be
no small addition to the charms of Swamies,. A good
peal of bells would increase the demand for pleasure
boats, as nothing sounds so sweetly across the siezing
sea as the sky music when it chimes and 01111411. Even
" rest and be thankful" yonder, breezy as it is for the
health of breathless climbers, would be oftenea full
when the winds set in that direction.
. . .

The wedding party were exceedingly pleased with
their waiter at the breakfast-table, let us add that it
was If. Merritt, of Wareham, who merited this praise.
Certainly we went to the show in Farmer Grant's
lawn, and saw the owl which was not nearly as hand-
some as the one at Mr. T. Horlook's been. The
jackal and llama would have looked bolder to us It we
had not just returned from our holiday "in town,"
when we took a walk in the Zlia with friend Kiddie,
and saw better specimens than ourselves or those of
the show. The solitary Zulu also looked suspicious
after the band of warriors at the Aquarium, and the
ring in Ms nose and other matters called forcibly to
our mind a S iuth African who used to show off his
handsome self. The performing pony was a nooses,
and when we come to consider the whole subject, ills
very kind of these showmen to dare the risk of burn-
ing of naptha in these dark and out-of-the-way
neighbourhoods. Brave people should be coun-
tenanced.
Mr. Frank Hoare anchored among WI on Tuesday.
May he find Zululand as peaceful ea he can desire
after all its wars.
The solicitor of our Board, Mr. Howari, and the
architect and surveyor, Mr. Creeke, of Bournemouth,
I conferred with their clients on Monday, the 12th inst.,
respecting their defence of the coming law-suit at Dor-
chester. Is it true that the stonemasons were can-
vassed to sign the petition on the ground that the
Board annotcnced !Se action 1 If so they were told a
1 daring fib, and if they signed it on that ground they
I have been taken in. 'Freda must be bad to make them
I believe that any good can come to them out of anyone
I of the name of Robinson.

That truly admirable gratis newspaper the Bourite,
mouth and South Cowl Advertiser, which is circulated
In Swanage, honours us in its January number by its
notice. We, poor we, are "smart' " witty,"
"caustic," " cynical," "public censor," and of no
" particular party." We, little Lucie, remind the
writer of "Junius," " Swift," and " Diogenes." AU
this is very funny. But what shall we say of being
" rheumatics]," " bitter," " sweet" [bitter-sweet
evidently). a "dust thrower," a Falstathan illustra-
tion, and of the good wishes for our future light and
sweetness, which gush forth from the writer's tender
bosom? We can only say that, barring
_the " rheu-
matics," it is all 'too good to be true." Nothing but
excessive huasility prevents us from putting our
'headstone" at once under Mr. James klaysom's
hand, upon which monument these good words may
appear as our epitaph. Thus cut into Purbeck
marble we could at the next twinge of rheumatlos
wish ourself dead to enjoy lying beneath such weighty
words and works, about as true as most monumental
testimonials. .

Kiddie thinks that the writer was flinging a 'tone
at us, or that all this is red-hot irony, offered as a
wreath for our weak brain. Our letters are " effu-
sloes." They are not, for in our present state of
health they are desperate efforts.
We have "pitched our tent in Swana^" nay we
have built us a house and intend to stay there as long
as rheumatics will allow us. We do not attack all
" iudiscriminztely," but with all the powers of die
crimination we possess. "01 late" we have buried our
grandmother, and that must account for our poverty
of thought. She had all our gamins. True she was
an "apple stall.keeper," but she kept fresh fruit and
sold it cheep, and was never guilty of the sin of our
common grandmother, who brought toss of us to
apple-selling through her apple-stealing. To the good
wishes of the writer, if they are sincere—Amen—if
they are not—So-let-it-be. Afig for Falstaff, we deal
In "bread" because it is the "staff of life," and have
nothing to do with "sack" lest we should tumble over
that staff and break our neck. Forgive us, Mr.
Editor, "This much Ado about Nothing," for that
much are we—Loch and I.
. . .

The weather, air, will be from frosty to stormy, till
we write again.
Lucie.

MILSORNIII IT. 11.101DRIW.
MISSTONAIT MUTING.— A public meeting In behalf
of the Society for the Propagation of the Gospel in
Foreign Parte was held lu the schoolroom on the
evening of Friday, January 9th. The meeting
preceded by Divine 'orrice -in the qtah. wtha:
=ll4lr being the ply. J. Frets Langford, vicar of
-- • who - his t- thew vi., 10