The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1875-02-06 00:00:00

A SAVING HUSBAND.—" George, dear, don't
you thiok it is rather Extravagant of you to eat butter
with that delicious jam! "--" No, love—Economical I
Same
_piece of bread does for both ! "--Punch.

A CHOICE EPITAPH.—The following choice
epitaph may be found in a New Jersey churchyard :
"Here lies, stranger, a father spill'd
From a stage coach, and thereby kill'd !
Ills name was John Sykes, a maker of iron
horse-mangers,
Slain with three other outside passengers.
"Weep not, for the business is carried on by James Sykes,
his son and heir."

THE PUNISHMENT OF THE LASH.—At a meet-
ing of the Law Amendment Society, held on Monday
evening at its Rooms, Adam-street, Adelphi, London,
under the presidency of Mr. Frederick Hill, a paper
was read on "The Punishment of the Lash." Mr.
Justice Keating had been requested to occupy the
chair; but, in a letter, regretting his inability to be
present, he made the following important statement:
The opinion I have formed, after a very long ex-
perience, is, that the proposed extension of the punish- •
ment of the lash is a mistake, not calculated to effect
any of the legitimate objects of punishment, and cal-
culated rather to create a criminal class more desperate
even than any now existing." A discussion followed,
and the proceedings terminated in the usual manner.
THE BOTTLE CONJUROR OUTDONE. —Punch's
excellent old, ever young friend, George Cruikshank
—Esto perpetuus—has put forth a second edition of his
"Bottle," about half the size of the first issue, but
from the originv 1 etchings. It is, in fact, a pint in-
stead of a quart bottle, but the lesser contains as much
flavour and spirit as the larger measure. George beats
the original " Bottle-Conjuror." He has put himself
first into a quart, and now into a pint bottle! Bravo,
George I—Punch.
SPECULATING WOMEN--The San Francisco
Chronicle of the 7th inst. says :—The number of female
operators is increasing daily, and the lucky ones, with
smiling faces, may be seen at all hours of the day
dodging into brokers' offices to give orders and receive
reparts. As the female mind is not of one opinion
long, the brokers are frequently nonplussed, if not
annoyed, at the contrary orders received from their
female clients. A leading broker illustrates the vagaries -
of his lady clients as follows :—" The other day, at 10.50
a.m., I received the following note Dear
Please buy me 100 shares Gould and Curry. I am told
by a friend it will go up.' Just after the call of Gould
and Curry, and after I had bought the stock, I received
the following Dear Mr.—. Please don't buy the•
Gould and Curry; instead buy anything you think
will go up.' Now, wasn't lin a fix? I sent out word •
Bought you G. and C.' Then came an order—
'Please sell the G. and C. right away, and don't buy'
anything.' Ten minutes more, and I received another
note—' Buy me 20 California at market price. Do
you think it will go up?' The call was over on Cali-
fornia, and I didn't get it. Met my lady client after
the board, and reported in person. And so the ladies
change their minds twenty times an hour." The num-
ber of ladies who have already made money in stocks is
quite large, and it increases daily, as one taking
courage follows in the footsteps of another.
WEIGHT FOR AGE.—Lady (to Candidate for
Parlour-Maid's place): "Thirty, are you! That is a
little Older than I should have wished —"—Young
Person: "P'rhaps, M'm, 'Umiliation o' Spent would
compinsate, M'm ! "—Punch.
Too MUCH ‘‘ENTERPRISE."—The morning
papers of Cincinnati erroneously reported a few days
ago, the death of an injured young man in that city, ,
and one of the evening papers, going still further, an-
nounced that the inquest had been held, published a
verdict, and gravely stated that no further develop-
ments have been made in the case. This may have
been somewhat unpleasant to the doubly injured young
man, but doubtless was much more so to the news-
paper, which, in its next issue, proceeded to explain in
this wise: "Owing to the circumstances of a pressing
official nature, Coroner Maley did not hold an inquest
on Frank Becker's body yesterday" (" the circum-
stances being that the young man was still alive].
" We gave the item of the inquest having been held,
and a verdict returned, but it happened through neq-
lect of the coroner to inform us of his changing his
order for the day, caused by an emergency, after our
reporter met him, that the item was somewhat premse
tune." "An emergency" is still better than the
"circumstances of a pressing official nature," and the
"somewhat premature" is an apter phrase than
either.

AGREEABLE GEOLOGY !—The Rocky Mountain
News of December 30th says of a certain party :
"He is the owner of a newly-opened gold mine in Summit
district, and to judge by common report, a mine in that dis-
trict is a mint of money to its owners. Some specimens
from this lode, assayed at the Denver Mint, resulted as
follows— Gold, 2,64 ounces, or 65,702 dollars; and silver, 93
ounces, or 120 dollars per ton. And yet this ore was taken
from the vein at a depth of only fitteen feet. That's the '
sort of stuff that makes millionaires."

"How I DID IT !"--A writer in the New
York Evening Mail says :—" Advertising is a science,
my friends. Don't you think you are clever enough
to advertise without knowing anything of that science.
You are not, and there's where you're wrong. Listen
to one who made three millions by it and confessed at
our office last week. He said the best method of secur-
.in, the attention of newspaper readers is very simple,
and consists in continuous advertising. Fitful, spas-
modic announcements doubtless produce a certain •
effect, but it is the steady, constant advertiser who
prospers in the end. The best way is to advertise
liberally and continuously, and all who have sufficient
courage and capital to invest without stint have found
themselves rewarded even beyond their expectations.
The secret of success lies in uninterrupted advertising, •
varied by occasional " spreads " on suitable occasions.
Every paper has its regular readers, and the continued
advertisement familiarises them with the name and '
object of the firm. Moreover, the interests of firm ,
and paper become united; the reader who buys the:
paper because he likes it, looks at the title of the
house day after day and the proposals made, and in
time comes to like the name of the firm and the pro-
posals. When an extra announcement is made, he
reads through with attention, as the utterance of a
familiar friend, and gives attention and consideration
to the matter discussed. This is how I did it."
To CHORAL SOCIETIES REQUIRING AID.-- ".
Apply to the "Singer" Manufacturing Company.—
Punch,.

NEW ZEALAND '' LADIES."—The sudden trans-
formation of a servant-girl into a grandly dressed lady,
is sometimes quite startling. "Not very long ago,
says Mr. Bathgate. "I noticed a girl, whom I chanced
to know had come to the colony as an assisted immi-
grant, sitting in full splendour, with cloak, bouquet.
and fan, beside her husband in the front row of the
dress circle at the Italian Opera ! " Unfortunately, '
it is easier to decorate the person than to cultivate the
mind. In the wrong use of phrases Mrs. Malaprop
iis beaten nollow. A girl who had been developed nto
a lady was heard to speak of getting an " antimonic
dress, meaning a dress of moire antique. Another gave
it as her opinion "that the mayor of their town should -
wear a scarlet robe lined with vermin," meaning, of
course, ermine. Male immigrants who have come sud- -. 1
40 denly into wealth are apt to make similar mistakes.
One night, at a public supper party, an individual sat
opposite to to a dish of pdtes de foie gras, which rare and
costly dish he persisted in calling "potted photo-
graphs."— Chambers's Journal.
, , 4 .
RATS AND GAS PIPES.— The Glasgow Beretta 4,..
says that about eight o'clock on Sunday. morning a f'lo
woman named Mrs. Dempster went to the provision
shop of Mary Hart, or M`Nab, at 15, WAlpine- -t
street, Glasow, but could get no admittance.
She returned several times before half-past ten, '
and still the door was closed. She began to sus. ..
pect that something was wrong, and on informing her husband he, he, along with two other men, went and
forced the door in the close. On entering, Mrs.
M'N'ab, with her two children, Barbara, aged seven
years, and David, aged five years, were found in bed
insensible, and the servant, Catherine Hughes, were .
found lying on the floor in a similar condition, while
the premises were filled with gas. 'I he poor people .•
were carried off by the relieving party to another
house, and Dr. Jack was called in. He applied the usual
restoratives, and the children and the servant have
all recovered, but Mrs. M`Nals still lies in a preoarious
condition. Intimation of the escape was sent to the ,-
Gas Office, and a plumber was sent to examine the
pipe, and find out where the leakage had occurred. On .
inspection he di.covered that a large hole had been cut
into the lead pipe near the meter, by the rats, andi
that there must have been a large escape of gas. The
-
defect was immediately remedied.
A FRIGHTFUL CASE OF HYDROPHOBIA.—A '
frightful case of hydrophobia has jusc occurred at
Preston, Lancashire. A man named William Hodge,
who worked on his father's farm, after returning home
on Thursday evening in last week, complained of a ,
severe pain in his right arm. He sent for Mr. Hall,
surgeon, who saw him twice during the night, and
having noticed a peculiar mark on the arm, suspected
thathis patient had at some time been bitten by a dog.
His fears were verified next day, when his patient
went raving mad. He fell into horrible convulsions, '
an,i foamed at the mouth. He was then removed to
the infirmary, but with great difficulty, as two or
three 4rong men were scarcely able to restrain him.
Hodge continued to sink, and died in great agony at
five o'clock on Saturday morning. He has left a widow
and five Children.

MESSRS. MOODY AND SANKEY'S VISIT TO
LIVERPOOL —Messrs. Moody and Sankey's mission
opens in Liverpool on Sunday morning. An im-
mense hall of wood has been erected for the holding of
the services, at a cost of .0,500. Its interior dimensions
are 174 feet long, and 124 wide, having a clear central
width of 72 feet, and on either side galleries of 26 feet
wide, and at the east end a gallery of 40 feet wrde. It
will acconamodate 8,000 persons, exclusive of platform
seats. It is lighted by 83 windows, Und there are no
less than 20 doors for exit, all opening outwards. There
are five staircases for the gallery. Very complete ar-
rangements have been made for lighting and warming.
Interiorly the sides or walls have been covered with
canvas, and papered with oak paper. Ventilation hi
provided in the roof by two large trunks with outlets.
In rear of the large hall are two " inquiry " and meet-
ing rooms, and retiring rooms for ladies and gentlemen, If
About 30,000 cubic fet>t of timber have been used ill
the construction, and 3,200 superficial feet of glass. ,
The erection has occupied altogether 39 working days. '
THE EMPEROR OF RUSSIA AN D JEWISH MISSIONS, ,i 4
—The Emperor of Russia has just granted an import.
ant concession to the London Society for Promoting 7
Christianity among the Jews. This Society, which
has stations in most of the countries of Europe as well '
as in Palestine and the northern parts of Africa, hag
been excluded from Russian territory since the out-
break of the Crimean War. Various attempts lave
been m ade to obtain permission for reopening the sod ety'S
mission, but until now without success. A short time
ago a deputation, coonsistino• of the Rev. Frederick
Smith, secretary of the society, and Mr. J.
Alexander,
proceeded to St. Petersburg with a petition to the
Emperor, signed by the Earl of Shaftesbury as pre,
sident. This petition has not only been graciously re-
ceived by his Imperial Majesty, but full permission
has been granted for the above named society to send
its agents to Poland and other parts of Russia where
Jews reside, and an extensive field for missionary
work has thus been opened, as is evident when it is
borne in mind that wittuin the territory over which the
Emperor rules the Jewish population probably exceeds
three millions,

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