The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1873-08-09 00:00:00

Nisrellantous 4(ntriligente,

HOME, FOREIGN, AND COLONIAL.

A DEAD BARGAIN !—A Roman Catholic
Bishop of Newfoundland had a piano, of which he
wished to dispose, and which a friend, a Protestant
doctor, desired to purchase. Considerable chaffering
ensued before the bargain was consmnated, and the
doctor finally secured the instrument at a price which
the bishop declared ruinously low. The only vehicle
in the town which would accomo late the piano, when
the time came for its delivery, .118 the hearse; and in
this it was accordingly driven to the doctor's door.
Down came the doctor in Is gh dudgeon. " Why on
earth," he asked, 'did you act thus r diciilously, and
send my piano home in the hearse?" The bishop's
eyes twinkled as he remembered their hard bargain,
and he answered, 'Oh, because it was such a dead
bargain!'

-
" IDLE TKARS."-.-M re. Malaprop canna make
sot what people mean by saying that the Liberals
want "a good cry." She thought it was only E omen
who gave way in this manner. But if great grown-up
men must let their feelings get the better of them, she
is glad they have the good sense to go into the country
to do it. For her part—and she by no means approvta
of everything which Imo been done these Sessions,
especially those % snrib.ir Post °Hien enclosures—she
cannot see that there is very much to cry about.—
Punch.

PRESS:IC& OF MIND !—A correspcndent
the Boston Transcript states that two yoong Isdiea
from Boston, who have been staying at Tip Top House,
Mount Washington, found in their ranw lee about the
mountain that a gentleman of the party had clipped
into a dangerous position, from which it WIIM
ho-
puasible for him to extri,:ate himself. The corres-
pondent says "One of the young I.,dies, lying tlAt
upon the ground, slid out over the bank from which
the gentleman had slim.. d. clinging rueanwhoe to the
feet of the second lady, will in turn clung fast to a
sharp rock above. Toe gentleman was drawn up
s!owly an i with treat ell. vt, having with par lonable
indelicacy grasped his preserver about the ankle,"

-
MILLIONNAIRZSSES.—Mr. A. " Well, good-
bye, dear. Yon must come and ate my new areFses
from Paris—one charming morning dress, among
others, quite simple, and only cost sixty seven
guineas ! You 11 come, won't you? and tell me what
you think of it ! "—Me:. B. "0, my dear, I'm no
judge of cheap clothing, you know l"—Punch.

THE RIGHT THIS TO APPLY Foil A ROLE
It may be worth while saying that Lord Westbury
was the Rodbell who figures in the well-known legal
story. While practising as a barrister he applied to
one of the judges for a rule, and was put off, and
delayed, mot otherwise trilled with. Happening to be
at a watering place soon after, he saw the obstreperous
jud6e bathing in the sea, and at once put off in a punt
to renew his" application." The judge saw him
coming, and, knowing what a determened fellow he
was, cried out, "Take a rule, Bethel!, take a rule !"
and dived out of sight. The same thing is reported of
a bathing judge at Twickenham who heard counsel
and granted rule while he was splashing about merrily
SS a merman, and as native in costume as an oyster
witbont its shells.
POLICE AS GoMCKEnIEIts. Her Majesty's
Inspector of Constabulary in Scotland states in his
report this year that a syrtem prevails in the counties
of Perth and Renfrew of swearing in as constables
ceruain persons., principally gamekeepers, under an Act
of 22nd James VI., 1617. These persona have all tne
powers given to constables by the Police Acts, and
also by many ape tial statutes; but they are not in any
way under the control or direction of the Chief Con-
etahle, nor Con he give a return of them. It is stated,
however, that in Itenfrewshire, where the system pre.
rails to a somewhat less extent than In Perthshire, 11
gamekeeoers have been so sworn in by the Justices, the
force of the regular police being 50 in strength. The
inspector submits that the system is inset undesirable,
and is a violation of the spirit, if not the letter, if the
Police Act of 1857.
PLATE ASO PORTION. Our economical
Government is not so frugal but that it has asked Par.
liament to vote .12000 " for presents of plate to the
Geneva Arbitrators." To this request the House of
Commons assents; Lard Enfield having explained
that "the United States Government had provided
three pieces of plate for the Arbitrators, in lieu of
a money payment for their services, and it was
now proposed to do the same." There is, however.
a difference between the position of the British
Government and that of the American. No kind
friend can suggest to the Yankees that they should
keep their plate to eat thsir Humble Pie upon.—
Punch.

NATIONAL TRAINING SCHOOL. A circular
issued by the Society of Arts announces that ttie
society has finally determined to take the initiative in
the establishment oh a national trainiug school in music
for 300 pupils. The fundamental principle of the
school is define! to be the cultivation of the highest
musical aptitude in the country, in whichever station
of society it may he found. In accordance with Chia
principle, no pupils will be admitted except after a
competitive examination. As it is evident that very
many pupil, whom it is desirable to attract will not be
able to pay the fees, or even to maintain themselves
during the course of study, it is hoped to found as
many as 300 scholarships. The society expressa confi.
dent hope that the school will, whea successfully
established, be adopted and managed by the State.

UPI FORTUNATE BaZgILLES !—A correspondent
of The Times writing from Sedan, under date July 31,
says
Tuesday evening this town and the neighbouring
villages were visited by a most terrific thunderstorm. The
rain fell In torrents, accompanied by hailstones of Immense
size, and in the course of a few minutes the streets were
completely thoded. I regret to say that the damage at
ltszedies amounts, at the I tweet calculation, to more than
200,0e0f. Many of the houses which had only recently been
finished had thetr roofs carried away, so that the poor vil-
lagers, scarcely recovered front the effects of the col.flsgra-
tion of the 2nd of geptentner. 1870, are again refineco to
despair ny this awful dispensatim of Providence. Bezeilles
has truly suffered most severely. In addition to the still
visible destruction caused by the troops in 1070, the village
presents soother dreadful picture of the war of elements.
Few people have ever beheld to curious a spectacle, and 1
trust that tourists returning irom Vienna will be induced to
arrm ge their route so as to enable them to visit the pot
and to contribute their mite to all of the doubly afflicted
Inhabitants, moat of whom are haid-working and industrious
weavers with families."

"LAND AND WATER."—In the show of
Carris4os in the International Exhihition, there is what
is called a "Medium Canoe Landau." After much
consideration, the only conclusion we can arrive at is
that this vehicle has been deeigued with an eye to th
future—for the ace ,mmodation and traneport of mom
amphibious rite of beings, which the researches o
modern travellers and men of science may yet bring to
light. —Punch.
(limn Disassis Itt IRELAND.—An official
return shows the gradual subsidence of cattle disease in
Ireland in the last few months. In the week ending
the 16,8 of November, 1872, there were no lees than
4,318 farms or places under restrictions on account of
the foet and mouth distemper, and in the Week ending
the 31st of May, 1873, there were only 76 ; in the former
week 768 outbreaks of this distemper were reported,
but only 14 in the later week. Pieurmpneurnonia has
not been no prevalent in Ireland, and in no week be.
tween the above two dates were so many as 15 out.
breaks reported ; the places under restrictions were
140 in the tint week of this period and 66 in the last
week. The places under r,strictions for sheep scab
diminished from 16 to 6 ; and no outbreak was reported
In the hat fortnight of the period.

THE NEW MASTER 0? THE ROLLS.—The
Jewish Chronicle. referring to the announcement that
Sir George Jewel will be the new Master of the Rolla
observes :

'ln the days of yore the Roils House was a depository of
records or archives. One of the titles of the Master of the
Rolls IF as Guardian of Converted Jews, because the Old
Rol, House in what was called in former days, New.street,
sad I. now Chancerylane, was an asjlum for converted Jews.
Happily the prove,s of time has arranged matters in such
fashion that a Moder of the Rolls need be no more a custo-
dian of wonverted Jews, nor need behave anything to do with
them. A cltverli.drawn clause in the new Judicature Act
quilts renr.v,a the Master of the Rolls from any religions
diflieulty. For the first lice a Jaw becomes no English judge
Doubtless, if all we hear be true, he will anon becoow nit
Ertgli.bpeor. It would be, Indeed, a matter of satish,tion
if intellect and work, ratter than wealth or political in•
filienc.., were first to raise a brother-lit-faith to the position
of a peer of the realm—a member of the British aristocracy
though a Jew's aristocracy is (as tl • ithoress of the 'Lost
id the .1 eriiloghams' c:early higher and older
timbre than the Eurgiiiis cachet of no'ollity."

A VISTER &N. —The 18th Royal Irish has tho
honour of possessing the oldest soldier in the British
Army, or psrhaps in the world, in the person of
the Colonel of the Regiment, General Sir John
Forster Fitz Gerald, G.C.13-, the nior General in
the Army, and a veteran of 80 years' sera- cc, his
first commission as ensign bearing date the 29th of
October, 1793. At the early age of 19 this dis-
tinguished officer was a Major, having obtained his
first cs mnission when he was eight years old ; in
six months and to days after he was a captain, and
joined his regiment, the 46th, as a captain of 71
years' standing at the age of 16. Sir John has
been a full General for the last 19 years, and Colonel
of the 18th Royal Irish for 13 years. Re commanded
a light Infantry regiment at the battle of Salamanca,
and a Brigade at the Pyrenees in 161:3 as Lieutenant-
ColoueL
THE HUNGER roil GOLD.—WQ have all heard
of morbid appetites for coal, chalk, slate pencil, and
other uninviting morrehs, but never can we have
heard, seen, or read anything so prodigious in this ab-
normal way as a statement made this Friday, August
the Ist, 1873—the exact date deserves precise record—
that "the public have absorhad nearly £200,000 of the
gold which arrived during the week " ! We shall look
with some curiosity into the Registriir-General's
report, to see whether jaundice has not been a very
prevalent complaint of late.—Puncli.

BLOWING-Ur OF A STEAM YACRT.—OR Satur.
day morning a party of four persons, consisting of
Robert Low, plumber, Dundee, a man in his employ.
ment named Dick, and two young men named Scott
and Murdoch, left Dundee in the yacot Warrior on a
ti.hing excursion d ,wn the river Tay. On reaching
Droughty Ferry they took on board Thomas Lorrimer,
a fisherman. Two young men were employed at the
engines. Dick steered, Lorrimer and Low sitting on
eaeh side of him. About a quarter of a mile south-east
of the ferry one of the young men remarked that the
engines were not working very well, and he looked at
the gauge with the view of ascertaining what pressure
was on. Scarcely had he done so when a violent ex-
plosion occurred, sinking the yacht. Low and Dick
and Lorrimer managed to keep up until the railway
'wage boat passed, when they were rescued. The
two young lads could not be seen, an it is believed
that they have beeu either killed or drowned. The
m-n who were saved were scalded and otherwise in.
jured.
PASTORAL BY CARDINAL CULLEN.— Last Sun-
day a pastoral from Cardinel Cullen was read in all
the Roman Catholic churches in Dublin, directing the
performance of a "novena," preparatory to the Feat
of the Assumption. In the course of the pastoral his
Eminence thanked the people for the genernsity with
which they had contributed to the collection fir the
Pope, and raid that on this as on many previous occa-
sions they had shown they were faithful children of so
good a father, and that they were determined to do
everything in their power to midst him in hit! diffi-
culties, and to enable him even in his captivity to dis-
charge the arduous duties confided to him as supreme
pastor of the church. On May 30 last a rescript was
published by Cardinal Patrizi, directing that on the
12th, 13th, and 14th of August public prayer should
be offered up for the universal Church, and his
eminence now called upon the faithful to pray
incessantly for the libtr Alia" of the Pope ; for hi, wel-
fare, and also for the happinesa and prosperity of the
Church and the salvation of souls. The cardinal, in
c ,nelusion, recommended prayers for the temporal and
spiritual wants of the people, to beg God to preserve
them from a visitati in of cholera, sod at the same time
advi-ed them to take all necessary precautions, in the
yr .y of e;einlinc.i onil terupwance in food and drink,
tI avert the Seenvge.