The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1888-05-12 00:00:00

DELIGHTS OF TRAVEL.

Mr. Edmund Yates writes as follows from Turin:
—That entente cordiale of which, in the old Imperial
days, we heard so much as existing between us and
the French, is now flourishing exceedingly between
the English and the Italians—the latter an intelli-
gent, light-hearted people, but of whom it must
be said, as the midshipman in the old story said
of the savages, that "their customs are beastly."
Travellers entering Italy by the Mont Cenis
route have to submit their handbags, &c.,
for examination at Modane, the frontier station,
but although the train is detained for more
than half an hour, the inspection of the general
luggage is deferred until the arrival at the Dogana, of
Turin. And I was yesterday the victim of such a
rigorous search as, in 40 years' experience of Conti-
nental travel, I have never seen equalled. All my
boxes were opened, and if I had been an unpopular
subaltern in a spirited regiment their contents could
not have been made hay' with more effectually;
delicate silk dresses were pawed and rumpled, jet-
trimmings torn and crushed, gloves thrown here and
there, bonnets—and your lady readers will sym-
pathise here—Virot's bonnets poked into with dirty
fingers, to see if, haply, they had been stuffed with
tobacco or cigars! The officiating gentlemen were
particularly hurt at my carrying my boots in canvas
Jags, and insisted on taking out each one separately
and making an examination of its sole. Then, to
add injury to insult, they demanded 7f 60c, which I
had to pay, receiving in exchange a document,
printed, like Mr. Browning's friend's scrotifrous French
novel, on coarse paper with blunt type,' wherein was
set forth in detail that I had been mulcted of 5f for
"five kilogrammes of mercerie commun," of 2f 50c
for one kilogramme of " tenuto lana fretmata," and
of 10c for the stamp on the receipt. What the " mer-
eerie commun " was I have not the faintest idea, but
the " lana " was two little balls of wool for knitting
purposes. Surely, sir, in these days this twopenny
inquisition should be abolished. The Italian Govern-
ment ought to know that English travellers, who
spend large sums of money in the country, are not
given to petty smuggling, and that they require to be
assured against unnecessary annoyance and humilia-
tion.

It is just as hard for the man who employs a
stenographer to refrain from casually alluding to it
as it is for a woman to fasten the top button of her
Newmarket when there is a diamond pin at her
throat.
" IN AN OLD HousE.—Mr. Phlatterly (trying to make
himself solid) : " What a remarkably strong manly
face your grandfather had, Miss Phillips." Miss
Phillips: "Pardon me, Mr. Phlatterly, but that's
grandma."
"No, William," she mournfully uttered, still allow-
ing him to retain her hand, "no, William, I can't
marry you. I don't believe you can provide a wifo
with butter upon your present salary, and I can't eat
margarine."
A YouNo widow has married again. An old friend
of the family reproaches her discreetly. "I am sure;'
be says, gently, "that you have not chosen as you
might have done. Had your poor husband been alive,
be would never have let you make such a match."