The Daily Times.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1860-06-09 00:00:00

THE CRINOLINE AND THE DEAD PIG

We have heard and read of several uses and abuses of
crinoline ; but we think the following use that was
attempted to be made of it, on Thursday evening, will
eclipse the very last new fashion, either from Paris or
I;ondon, or any other metropolis, more or less. We
think the case, too, must have considerable influence on
the fair sex who patronise the " hoops ;" but how it
will operate is altogether a matter of speculation and
mystery just now. Officer Barrow, No. 7, who stands guard
at the Clarence Dock-gate, and who acts as inquisitor-
general to all and singular, the people who go out thereat,
was exercising his peculiar functions of thinking what
might or what might not, be contained in the crinoline of the
ladies, whom he saw approaching the gate from the
river side. Now-the three ladies bore the names, or at
least gave them, which was about the same thing—of
Johanna Burns, Eliza Dunlery, and Ellen Kelly, and
the peculiar functions of the aforesaid trio, seem to be
as various as those of Mr. Garibaldi. The mission that
they have been engaged on, was that of supplying
oranges in exchange for copper or more precious
metals, to a heterogeneous mass of people, vul-
garly called emigrants, who had collected on
board the good ship Antartic, bound for that land
anomalously called the land of " Freedom," to wit
America, the only place in the world where human
slavery exists. The ship was on the river, and the
people were in the ship, and the prisoners went to the
people, and sold oranges to anyone who chose to pur-
chase the (to many) forbidden fruit. It so happened-7
curious coincidence—that the captain of the Antartic
has a decided penchant for nice pork, and being at some
place in the town he espied one of the handsomest young
grunters that ever graced a stye. His gastronomic pro-
pensities were brought into a state of excitement that
could not be allayed, except by the slaughter of the
juvenile swine, and he forthwith paid 30s. (as sworn
to by the cook of the ship) fur the " creature,"
and ordered it on board. The quadruped having
been introduced to the butcher ou board, soon
went the way of all its four-legged relations, and the
captain gave orders to have it cut up into certain fancy
pieces, and no doubt congratulated himself on a feast,
such as Alexander might have envied. The old adage,
however, of " many a slip between the cup and
The
lip," was fully borne out in the present inst,:indced.id
ladies in question, being on board, as aforesaid,
in
see any good reason why they shouldhen
()only difficulty
nice fresh pork as well as the captain :tthey indulge in
could roast,
was to get it on shore, and tihikeling.
To carry it
or broil it to their
of "'n
be flat burglary,
out openly would, course,maws wit, and very soon
but then comes in the Woman's
The crinoline oh,
got rid of all diffi.sb,lt
thearocapich
lady
yguish crinoline was called
the crinoline ; put portions of the dead
into operation,
hoops;an
about 10 lbs. was the portion of
pig into thaend
;bringMiss Kelly, thinking it would be a good
each lady
something to wash down the repast,
managed. to
what means did not transpire, to get tt,
ttnaged, t. 37
nttle of the ship's rum and about a pound weight
of tea, which she also stowed away in the crinoline.
The parties had passed all the sentries until they
came to Mister Cerberus Barrow, poli.-!emau No. 7,
and that functionary thinking the crinoline rather
denser than usual, had the impertinent curiosity to
examine the ladies; and, sure enough, there was the
pork, and the tea, and the rum, and several other mate-
rials found in the horrible crinoline ! Mr. Barrow is a
most unmerciful man, and therefore he brought the
three ladies before Mr. Castellain, yesterday, at the
police court, when the above facts were given in evi-
dence, and the parties were remanded. This is the last
tale of the crinoline.