The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1873-01-25 00:00:00

CUTTINGS FROM AMERICAN PAPERS.

The Louisville Courier &Overtime" for a smart boy to
spear cockreathea

The young ladies of Chicago have recently estab-
lished a " personal beauty league." The objects of the
society are not stated.

A married pair in Kentucky' aged reapectively nine-
teen and thirteeett, have applied to the coarts tor a guar-
dian,

A cheap way of getting credit for liberality was
devised by the managers of • fair in Illinois, who offered
premium for the oldest spinster present. Of course nobody
claimed I.

At a late wedding in Philadelphia a lime light was
thrown on the bride as she left the church, and was no
managed as to flood the carriage with light, thus exhibiting
the beauty and toilet of the blushing being to an admiring
multitude.

"You mind have lived here a long time," amid a
travelling Englishman to an old Oregon pioneer. •. Ye., sir,
I have. Do iou see that mountain? Well, when I came
here that mountain was a hole in the ground." The Erg-
Ilshonui opened his halt-shut eyes.

A Yankee editor says :—" If the party who playa
the accurdein in this vicinity at night will only change his
tune occasionally, or sit wlare we can scald him when the
engine has steam on, he 011 hear of something to hla *A-
y an tag e.'

Mr. Taylor, the late sailor.preacher, of Boston,
astonished a divine who had refused to enter his pulpit be-
cause a Unitarian mlnistv had been in it, by falling on hi,
kneea n the pulpit stairs and crying out, "0 Lord, deliver
us In Boston from two things, bad rum and bigotry. Thou
knowest which Is worst, for I don't."

Pestered with "'Contributions in verse "from a per-
sistent rhymester till his patience gave out, an American
editor wrote to his correspondent thou—' if you don't
atop sending me your sloppy poetry, I'll print • piece of It
some day, with your name appended In full, and send • copy
to )our sweetheart father." That poetical fountain sponta-
neously dried up.

A poverty-stricken clerk applied for a situation to •
large employer of labour in the western district. There was
no vacancy, and be wet curtly informed of the fact. Being
of a religious turn of mind, as he wit@ leaving the office he
consoled himself with the passage of Scripture the con-
cluding words of which are, "Bath not where to lay hls
head " "Dint stand there quoting Shakspeare," said the
employer : "I can't give you what I haven't got."
During the late American war a man out Weet, in a
sniall gathering of friends, we.. urging upon their minds the
Importance of enlisting. "Go, my brave friend.," said he;
" fight for your country—die for it, if it be necessary, for it
Is sweet to die for your native land." "But." said one, '' if
ill, sweet to die for one's country, why don't you go!"
This swas a poser, and for a moment disconcerted him; but
ralblur, he declared that he, as an Inliviilual, 'wa. not
fond of sweet things."
Elder Knapp, the great revivalist of religion down
in Arkansas, when about to baptise anew convert, called out
In a loud voice, "Does any one know any reason this man
should not be baptised!" and to his surprise a long specimen
of an Arkaness traveller shouted in respone—" See here,
Mister Preacher, I don't want to Interfere in that ere business
of yours. but if you expect to get the sin out of that old cuss
you will have to anchor him out in the river over night."

The Chicago Times has received an original poem on
"The burnt district at midnight" The 102nd verse reads
" The derrick stands still 'isalint the hail finished wall. The
brick piles are quiet and tall ; the stones are at rest ; the
workmen finished with Well l'm blessed.' To-morrow houses
'll be nine or ten stories tall. In huge, massive structures
—" The poet could not find a nearer rhyme than lobsters
for this line, so he has left the reader in an agony of ens-
Pellae.