The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1880-03-27 00:00:00

WOMAN'S NERVE!

A tall lady with a saturnine countenance came into
the Chronicle office to-day and demanded of one of the
reporters if Virginia offered a good field for a series of
a dozen lectures on woman's suffrage. "I don't
think the Comstockers have thought much about
female suffrage," replied the reporter frankly. "Don't
say female," said the tall lady, sharply. "Why not ? "
asked the reporter, in innocent surprise. " Because,
sir, a term that is used to describe sex in animals
should not be applied to women." The reporter admitted,
in great humillation, that the point was well taken,
and looked up in some alarm at the severe countenance
of the lady, who was a head taller than himself d
i , and
manifestly able to thrash him in the interests of pro-
gress, f so disposed. The stern countenance softened
somewhat at the signs of confused inferiority, however,
and the lady continued :—" The cause of. woman is
the cause of humanity. The cause of humanity
embraces all progress. Why, then, should the people
of Virginia be indifferent to woman?" " They're
not !" cried the small reporter, hastily; "far from it.
Woman is the boss of this camp. Everything she i
wants she gets, and not one n a hundred has to do
a lick of work." :.` Mere toys," said the tall one,
with deep'scorn. Playthings for an idle hour. You
cover woman with silks and gaud, and sink her soul
into insignificance by. circumscribing her sphere and
allowilag her no mission in life." " Well," admitted
the small reporter, "that's about the way we look at
it up here, that's a fact. Women haven't got the
nerve to rastle for thernselves, like . the men.,,
" Ner-r-r-ve ! " She uttered this word m a terrible
tone so terrific that the small reporter half rose from
his Chair. "Nerve ! What is there
,requiring nerve
that you do that I am incapable of ? ' "No offence,
madame, no offence. I meant nothing personal, I
assure yrou." "Am I not stronger than you?" she
demanded, scorning the apology. "Am I
_not gifted
with as great a brain? Why do you despise my
sex? We can bear more pain, and are, therefore, your
superiors in courage." The small reporter was gazing
fixedly at a dark corner of the room, and made no
answer. "Nerve, indeed ! " continued the tall lady,
"why women have infinitely more nerve than
That 'men.
the
Only yesterday I saw a woman—" "
biggest rat I ever saw in the office," said the small re-
porter, staring intently at the dark corner. The
screams that rent the air brought in all the printers
and several citizens from the street. When they
arrived the tall one was standing on a chair with one
hand covering her eyes and the others convulsively
clutching at her skirts as she gathered them close
around her. The small reporter wisely took advantage
of the crowd to slip out, and he telegraphed from
Gold Hill that he was going down to Carson to work
up a big item.—Virginia City (Nevada) Chronicle.

VERY SAD !—He got up one morning, feeling heavy
at heart, without knowing the cause. He went to the
back door, and there saw his garden, the pride of his
waking hours and the subject of his dreams, looking
like an editor's office. He sat down on the doorstep
and said, "Of all the sad words of tongue or pen,
The saddest are these I keep a hen

A CHINESE FUNERAL.
The North China Herald of Feb. 5 says :—Yei
Yuan-t'ung, a secretary of the Chinese Legation at
Paris, died at that city in December. His body
arrived at Shanghai by the M.M. Company's steamer
Sindh, and was removed from the wharf where the
steamer lay yesterday morning. About half-past
eleven a procession was formed. First of all went
two men bearing white lanterns, then two ethers
bore between them a long tablet made cf blue paper
and bamboo some twelve or fifteen feet •long, on
which was a long inscription in red, yellow, and
silver characters. Immediately behind them walked
two men with thick ropes, apparently of bamboo,
which were burning. Thirty-three white wooden
fans with blue and red characters inscribed
thereon, were carried by as many boys. Ten
runners followed with sworn and halberds. Behind an
umbrella with two folds rode a horseman; then came
four yellow fans, and 20 more men with weapons. of
various descriptions. A bamboo chair decorated with
orange-coloured paper was carried before six priests
clothed in red robes with deep blue borders. Another
chair similar to the first, but with red paper instead
of orange-coloured, came next, and behind it six
priests with pink robes, and carrying in their hands
small bathers consisting of two narrow strips of blue
silk, with one of white between them, with characters
inscribed on them. The third chair preceded a
horseman dressed in white; behind him were boys
',eating gongs, and a large umbrella with three
folds. Four runners dressed in white walked before
the official chair of the deceased secretary,
carried by four bearers. Then came some of his
relatives, his three sons first. Behind each was
carried a large white fan. They were all supported on
both sides by other mourners. The youngest walked
first, he was apparently about six years old ; the eldest
came last of the three; he appeared to be about 15,
and the other seemed to be about ten years old. The
coffin was contained in a large bier borne by 16 bearers,
all of whom wore green plumes in their hats. The bier
was covered on the top with a scarlet covering, and
surmounted by an effigy of a stork. From the centre
of the top were arranged pieces of silk of red, green,
blue, white, orange, and pink. They hung over the
edge of the covering and were decorated with rosettes.
The six panels on each side of the bier and the two at
each end had pictures and inscriptions painted on
them. The case containing the coffin was covered
with red cloth. Behind it came six chairs, in which
rode female mourners.

A short distance up the Canton-road the coffin
stopped, and a table witk food on it, with two red
candles burning, was set in the middle of the road.
White cloths were spread on the ground in front of the
table and on the right-hand side of it. The three sons
knelt on the right-hand side, and two or three officials
who formed part of the procession prostrated them-
selves before the table and the coffin, and afterwards
before the three boys who were already prostrate on
their kneeling-cloth. This operation was repeated
shortly afterwards in the same road, once in the Fuh-
kien-road, and once in the Nanking-road. From the
Maloo, the procession went along Honan-road, over
the Soschow Creek down Tien-dong-road, along Miller-
road, and thence out through the fields to a building
at Dan-Kao-gyiao belonging to a silk-guild, in
which were already a large number of coffins. Here
the case containing the corpse was taken out of the
bier, avid when it had been carefully placed in position,
a table with green candles on it was placed at its head,
and the ceremonies usual on such occasions then took
place, being performed by the relatives and friends of
the deceased official. A blue tablet with gilt cha-
racters about two feet and a half high was placed on
the table, as was also a considerable quantity of fruits,
meat, fish, &c., and almost the same observances took
place that had occurred in the street. After the sons
and male friends had finished their acts of worship, the
wife and sister of the deceased and the female mourners
followed their example.
It was stated that early in the approaching (Chinese)
year, the body would be removed to Nanking.