The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1872-06-29 00:00:00

CUTTINGS FROM AMERICAN PAPERS.

A Chicago congregation pricked up its ears when the
minister said "1 have land to sell," but dropped off to sleep
again alien IM added" the beautiful Land on high." .
A Yankee editor, speaking of a large and fat con-
temporary, remarked that if all flesh woo gran, he mast he a
load of hay. "4 tapect I am," wad the fat man. "from the
way the donkei are nibbling at me."

An editor, in a essay, dwelling upon'the importance
of small things, says that he always takes" note even of
straw"—" especially, perhaps, if there's a sherry cobbler at
the end of it," remarks a rival editor.
A Wisconsin editor speaks hf a wind which "just
sat on its hind legs and howled" The rival editor of that
same P efility says he has found the whole of that wind In the
leading articles of his opponent.
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Did you run away from Texas ? " Paid to Ma friend,
who returned from that country in something of a hurry at
the eummourxment of the rebellion.—" !'o—oh, no? I did
not run away exactly, but 1 gare some of 'co a Ilya einten of
uncommon tall walking !"

A Yankee apothecary's boy rva.v sent to leave at one
houses box of pills, and at another six live fowls. Confused
on the way, he left the pills where the fowls should have
gone, and the fowls at the pill place, The folks who re.
calved Ow fowls were astonished at reading the accompany-
ing direction: "Swallow one every two hours."

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New York lawyer who was defending a cue in
the supreme Court, the other day, said he had two witnessea
to court in support of the cause of hi. I .lient, and that they
would be sure to speak truth, for he had had no opportunity
itf communicating with them!

A young man in California whose friends had ceased
to correspond with him, woke up their interest by sending
letters to business men In his native place, inquiring the
price of a tolerahly-sizA farm. Seven affectionate letters
came from the friends by return of post, kiki several have
come singe, including one from an old (and culd; sweet-
beast.

-11;a Arneriaans criticise disapprovingly the recent
fashii-n of English ladies wearing black trininied with
white At ki,ot, nothinz daunted by the usual disinclina-
tion nf the An'sri-ans t, have things in black and white, a
conidcralle number of ladies wore black velvet, trimmed
with chinchilla it grebe. Some had I.lack costuirina ern.
breidered in gold, The Princess a Wales reversed the
order, having en a white drew; titenned with black.

Among the most extraordinary advertisements,
culled from the Amerioan papers, Is the following :—"This is
leap year. DI wait no longer. So here I am, twenty one
yearn, healthy, prepossessing., medium size, foil chest, edu-
cated, prudent, large sparkling e 3 ea, long, black, flowing hair,
and as WI of fun as a chestur Is full of meat, born to mako
some man happy, and want a home. Does anybody want
me 't

A Yankee editor lately closed a leatler in this un-
happy strain—. The sheriff's officer is waiting for us in the
other room, CO we have no opportunity to be pathetic we
are wanted, and must go. Delini,oentsubscribers—yott have
much to answer for. Heaven may forgive you, but we never
can."

An artless American who lately bought a few
sausages, thus narrates his troubles—"! got them sausages
home without getting hit; I cut them apart and left th,
In the morning I runted them. Three of 'em had cuddled
up together, and i;ere sleeping meetly. Two of 'eln hat
crawled to toy milk pall and n ere lapping the milk, and
floe, a black and white one, was on the fence Ir hug to cateli
an i.tiglish sparrow. I drowned the is hole let."

- - - -
A correrpondent of an American paper, wri,i,g
from the West Coast of Africa, thus grapui, tlly
his senutions 'fur away from all/bastion Here we
are. We are fur away from siviliaation, frets liongreas, and
from your fent silty. Here all ia peas. the prlme-eill
forest la beautiful. It 12 a tweet place. I like the wigrowa.
They are a kciitented people. They don't want not hlng, and
the kontry is full of Item There Is no Court House, no
Americas Club, no Dwain Hall, and no liraly atatoot Us Ulla

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