The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1873-07-12 00:00:00

glisaltantous nttiligettte,

ROME, FOREIGN, AND ZICLONIAL,

AGGRAVATING FLIPPANCY. —Flippant Lady.
"You eeem depreesed, Mr. Beenclerc I No bad new.,
I hope ?"—Romantic Gentleman. "Alt I if one could
only Forget l"—Flippant Lady. "Dear me! Hadn't
you better tell me all about it? and Pa Forget it for
you I"—Funela
A Sronm iw THE COPFEZ-COP.—The follow-
ing rules for weather wisdom have been founded on
long observation by a gentleman of Ydencis :—When
you put sugar into your o fee cup without stirring the
fluid, you must watch the bubbles which come to the
surface. If they form a circular MEM in the centre,
you may count on lasting fine weather; if they form a
ring at the edge, you may expect lota of rain; shauld
they remain between the edge and the centre, chsnse-
Able whether is to be looked for; if they go in s body
towards any part of the circumference, moderate rain
will follow. The observer has courulted his barometer
and thermometer in conjunc,ion with his coffee-coo,
and only publishes these facts to the world after pro-
found inveetigation.

AMENDED Sayiino.--" When France is tran-
quil, the World is satisfied."—Punch.
AN tamer STORY. - II is stated that there
is an officer in the Cen.ral Provinces whose business it
is to avert storms. His official title is " Garpagari."
This would be a useful official to attach to our present
Government in England. He receives a regular salary
of grain from the iuhabitalits of the circle of villages
who maintain him. If he should succeed in averting
stmosphelic calamities at a critical emergency, or in
bringing an opportune storm of rain afters long drooght,
his official salary is supplemented by a liberal bonus. So
great is the confidence repoeed in the skill of this officer
that on the occasion of the visit of any distinguished
Eu, °perm to the Inc Ally over which he presides, he is
solemmy led out into the jungle, and instructed
to howl for the public benefit. As a rule, says
the informant, the cos clantantii dew-to seldom fails
to produce the desbed effect. Shull his pious yells,
however, not propitiate Jupiter Pluvius—we beg his
pardon, Indr a—the fate that awaits him is a melan-
choly one. Like Belisarius, he is hurled from the
hiEhest pinnacle of human power to the lowest abyss
of depradaton. From having been a "olad c ,m-
-peller he bacomes temporarily the most despised
individual in the community. Ile is summarily " PU4-
pended," his , fficial eatery is taken from hiss, and he
is severely chastised with shoes by sin iod'gnant public.
Should, however, a temporary abstinence give hack
to him his former i ow,rs, he is once more restored to
favour.

NOT "ALL RIGHT."—A clever trick has
lately been played by one of the I,,ndon pollee de.
tectives (says the Court Journal). It is a freqnent
practice for men.servants in large establishments to
lay the dinner.table early in the afternoon, and as the
windows are usually open at this period of the year,
thieves have in several instances effected an entrance
thereby, and cleared off all the plate. One afternoon a
detective called at a house in a fashionable neighbour.
hood, and on the door being opened he said he had
come to warn the inhabitants that a good many plate
robberies had taken place. "All right," said the set..
vant. "But is it all right?" replied the detective.
"Oh, yes, I left the dining.room only • few minutes
ago." "Well there would be no harm in making
aure." So rather scornfolly the servsnt went into the
dining-room, and Or n scorn gave way to dismay. The
man was ready to faint, for every siinon and fork had
vanished. The detective then quietly opened a ca, pot.
beg which he had with him, and revealed ta he gaze
the missing orioles. The fl.,ective had himself got
in at the window oad swept off all the plate. It was
rather a dangerous experiment for him, but a very in-
structive lesson for Jeames.

ARTISTIC J(SISPRUDEMOS. —A case just ad-
judged in Perim will have an intereet focal! engaged in
oevoted to art (rave the Architect). M. Aldsma
gave a commission to the late painter Adrien Dans de
f x four pictures of subjects from the Arabian Nights,
at the price of 2,000 f. each, one-half to be pa)able
sihen the sketch was made, and the remainder on the
completion of the picture. The fleet subject selected
was that of" Sinbad the Sailor," the artist having re
o ived the fleet moiety of the money, but flying before
the work was absolutely completed. M. Airiama
claimed the work on paynent of the second 1,000 f.,
but the brother and heir qd the painter Mooed to give
it up, on the ground that it would be disreepectful to
the memory of an artist to part with an incomplete
pic.ure. The judges decided that the defendaet could
not refuse to give up what had been sold; that it was
not for him to judge of the comoletion of the work,
seeing that the purchaser was content; turf, finally,
that inch a point was inadmissible from the fact that
the late artist had himself thought fit to show it at
some public exhibition. The painting was ordered to
be delivered on payment of 1,0001., or 3,0001. were to be
forfeited.

CIVIL AND RELIGIOUS WAIL—The If ltra-
montanes In France, it is said, seek, by way of display-
ing their hostility to freethinkers, to have civil
funerals, not only in Avignon and Lyons, bat else-
where, performed In obscurity at daybreak. This
movement against civil funerals amounts to • sort of
civil war—civil war with the dead.—Punch.

&MITRING LILZ • &OWL —The " graphic
details" given of the cylone in lowa by the New York
Herald are introduoed by headings in the following
style :—" A Baby's Head Cut Off, and Its Mother
torn into Four Pieces. A School Girl a Quarter-
of a-Mile and Mashed to Jelly ; " but it would be diffi-
cult for the most sensational writer to exaggerate the
violence of the hurricane, and the ghastly nature of its
results in some cases. Az to the former, Mr. Gibson
had the finest home and out buildings in the country.
The wind blew the barns to bits. The house was in
two puts. One of these was turned quite round; the
other soared away like a bird," dropping the five in-
habitants into the cellar. A cornseller, weighing some
six bunired pounds, WAS blown about 120 rods. A
teamster named Baker was, with his waggon and team,
blown clean over a fence and • large flock of sheep
was destroyed by being fence,
into the air till, am an
eye-withem affirmed, they "looked like many birds."
The total loss is estimated in mo.ey at 175,000 dollars,
including 35 houses, 1,200 sheep, 2,503 hogs, 100 head
of cattle, 40 horses, aod all the crops along the track
of the storm. Twelve persons were killed on the spot;
29 were more or less seriously injured.
PARTIAL J COMIC& —A Bill before the House
of Commons, the Harbour Dues (Isle of Mao) Bill,
affords a fresh illustration of the political injustice
justly resented by the strong-minded of the weaker
sex. While the Right!! of Man are cared for by Par-
liament, even in • matter of such comparatively small
Importance se Harbour Dues, the Legislators add re-
fuses to recognise the Rights of Woman. In connec-
tion with this subject it may be noted that, wherries
the British Dominions include an Isle of Man, there is
no Isle of Woman in the whole of the United King-
dom. There is, to be sure, an Isle of Wight, but,
though Wight means Person, it is at most of common
gender. The French, marry, are more gallant; they
have their Beliviale.—Punch.

ACADEKT PCNCILLINGS. Affable Stranger
"There, Sir, my Work 'nag on the Line again ! Sir
Francis can appreciate a Good Thing, Sir. —Asto-
nished Stranger: "Eh ? What? I thought ?Aglaia
painted this Affable Stranger (contetnptuoualy)
"Pooh! 'E may have Painted it, but I Made the
Frame ! "—Punch.

FOUND DROWNED.—An inquest was held on
Tuesday at the "White Horse" Inn, Rottingdean, by
Mr. Fullager, coroner, on a body rot yet identified.
It appeared from the evidence of Francis Wood, •
coastguardsman, that on Saturday morning he found
the body of the deceased lying on the beach close to
the edge of the water, at Rottingdean. There was a
black high hat near the body, and the clothes were
marked "F. H. Hearn, London.' Thomas Ellis,
of Brighton. said that between eight and nine
o'clock on Wednesday morning lest he was walking
between Brighton and Rottingdean, and about 300
yards from the psygate saw the deceased lying on
the grass, sied near the edge of the cliff. He looked
round as if to see if any one wee coming, and then
walked sharply towards the cliff. Witness called
and ran up to him, saying, "Excuse soy calling to
you; I really thought you were going to jump over
the cliff." Deceased said, "Oh, no, no such thing; I
am not going to do that." Witness then left bun,
and, looking round afterwards, saw the decss.sd
sitting down by the bank. Edward William Tanner,
an engine-driver, saw the deceased waiting about on
the cl if on Wednesday evening. He suddenly dis-
appeared from the cliff, and witness never again saw
bin alive. Dr. Cann ssid the body was that of • MD
appar, qtly about 35 years of age, who had not been
emus' ,med to hard work. The face and bards were
disfigured from contact with the rocks and beach.
Death was due to drowning. The deceased was about
5 feet 8 inches in height. He was attired in bleak,
and wore side-spring boots. The inquest WM adjourned
in order to give the police thus to find the friends of
the deceased.