The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1874-11-28 00:00:00

CUTTINGS FROM AMERICAN PAPERS.

An embryo poet, who is certainly a close observer
of human nature, remarks—" Time marches En with the
slow measured tread of a man working by the day."

-
A Wisconsin farmer sues for a divorce on the ground
that his wife caul Chop the anuaLut of wood that she boasted
about previous to marriage.
- - -

Some of the people of Leavenworth are said to be so
soy that they wnte the name of the Mace 11 worth.
. .

A Columbus photographer presented a revolver at
the head of a gentleman who was sitting for his photograo,
with tho cheering remark : " My reputation as ail artist is at
stake. If you don't look smiling I'll blow your brains out.''
Re smiled.

-- -----
The matrons of Leavenworth, Kansas, have erected
an illuminated clock in order that their husbands may have
no excuse for "not thinking it was so late."

-
A gentlemanly advocate of cremation asked a friend
at• soirie for some money to get a bottle of champagne.
o, no," said he, "it would not do you good ; it would do
you wrong, for the drier you are the better you will burn."

.
Moonlight tnechani,s" is the name which an
American paper applies to buglare _

- - -
Two handsome ears paased through Boston by the
Adams Express the other day en route for ilamilton, Ohio.
The cats came from "way down East," AIM on the box was
a pathetic and poetic appeal for milk and bread.

•
This season ladies are going to dress their hair just
as they did 100 years agn, al s a New York magazine. This
makes some of the ladies pretty old, or old with certainty,
and of very doubtful prettiness.

`
A perpetual motionist propounded what he con-
sidered was a satisfactory solution of the problem to an
engineer: "Sir," was the reply, '• I will believe it when you
take yourself up by the waistband and carry yourself round
the room."

Two new words have recently been added to the
American vocabulary, namely, to burgle," meaning to
Injure a person by breaking into his or her house ; and, "to
statue," meaning to honour a person by erecting to him or
her a statue.

In speaking of a friend who possessed a very =hi-
cund countenance. some one said the other day—" I don't
think he drinks—in fact I know he does not, for he told me
so ; but probably sleeps in a bed with red curtains !"

- -
THE EDITOR AT Ijia POST.—A weekly newApaper
has Just been started in Louisiana, the editor of which ems-
introduces himself to the public Once more at the helm,
we fear no storms, no thunder, no billows. The winds may
roar and surge, and in wild mad career upheave the potiti-
cat ocean until lier discoloured depths are seen and bear
mountain height with wild confusion the billows and the
billows' spray. From cloud to cloud the rending lightning
may rage, until the heavens appear one broad sheet of lire,
and the torrents pour in unbroken floods, a solid maw.. The
ocean may rage, and her billows strive to reach the very
heavens, yet, safely, proudly, fearlessly will we steer our
staunch, storm-tossed barque until we have anchored in the
placid waters of the harbour of Constitutional Liberty."