The Dorset County Express and Agricultural Gazette.
Dorchester, Dorset, England, 1859-02-15 00:00:00

Yarictits.

One would imagine that the word " shop" bad not
only become contemptible, but had been discovered not
to belong to the English language. Now-a-days, all
the shops are "warehouses" or "bazars," and you
will hardly find a person having the hardihood to call
himself a shopkeeper, " Workpeople" are " employes."
"tea meetings" are "soirees," and " singers" are
"art is! re."

A " gent," whose word is his bontl—that is to say,
it would puzzle any Bankruptcy Commissioner to deter-
mine Well was the more worthless of the two—thus
laid down his travelling chart through life:—" I never
believe snore than one half of what I sees, inure than a
quarter of what I hear, and not a word of what I say. If
°then, were equally cautious there would not be so many
fools in this world." _

WHERE IGNORANCE 18 BLISS 'TIB FOLLY TO BS
Winx.—ln a church (not quite a hundered miles from
Stirling) a person entered a pew, and, believing he had
got a good seat, unfurtunatety sat down upon the dress
of a lady who happened to be rather highly erinolined.
In an instant he robe to his feet and begged the lady's
pardon in these words " Very pardon, teem ; but I'm
feaid I've broken your umbrella."—" Nothing wrong,"
said the lady, blu.hing.
- - • - • -

A Spanish priest, once exhorting the soldiers to fight
like lions, ad.W, in the ardour of entbusium ; " Refiect
my bretheren. that whosoever falls to-day in battle,
sups to night in Paradise." Thunders of applause fol-
lowed the sentiment. The fight began, the ranks
wavered, the priest took to his heels, when a soldier,
stopping reproachfully referred to the promised sup-
per in Paradise. "True my sun, true," said the priest,
• but I never eat supper."

• -
LIBELLOUA LASIESTATIoNS declare to you fuel
hence the source of my dismay) that if I were a you'll
man thrown into the society of the present day, I &mild
find myself perfectly incapable of falling in lore with
any of the young ladies that as vet have come under my
notice. I couldn't do it, these follower' of arts,
whose life is in the pictures they paint, or the books
they write, these scientific damsels who would strike me
dumb with a sense of toy helpless ignorance ill began
to converse with them—these political ladies, shove all,
who influence the affairs of Europe by their pens, and
talk leading articles at you by the hour together, if you
give them a chance—could I ever feel a tender senti-
'tient for any of these '! theca a man fall in love with
I artist, novelist, mathematician, or politician? No, he
I dosen't ; and the end of all these speculations is that
I turn with a feeling of profound relief and thankfulness
to my beloved Alicia, who is, as she always was, neither
more or learn than a luring woman, strong enough in
mind and and body for all a woman's work and duties.
but for no more; who would as soon think of picking
pocket* as of writing books knows no inure of alfebrs
than • flower, or of politics than a sky-Lark. Oh. I
could find six such women for my boys ! But I despair
of it: I don't believe they exist. Education, cultiva-
tion, intellectual elevation, and so forth, have absolutely
annihilated the species. Fruirr's Magazine, for
February.

The chief Analyrt of the "Sanitary Commiesion," Pr,
Alertlen hILL liroulal.•, in • reectit4 published relmW
'• The Georeral Tear ge Curantetee.- writer :—" When :
London Dock. I itepected *he present iniports oer•••s•
log to Merger, Ilaraiman and Cm, the well known
introdueers id • Pore raeoloured Tea': I saw numerous
(nun different cargoes opened, End took maples therefewit
hint I attereard• subjected to both inienweopal and chnion.
analysb. I found both Blacks and Greeng entire& fra P`ii"
all powdered roloori ay—the Brava a naturai dull obre he.
nue of the imparted ',lucid' facing found .at the mi"
v.ll 11•0. inveinuation• enable Inc coniklewitj
as• •. that consumer,. nou having the choice I pert
fri
not be doe hi lmnJiig betacen it mid that get wir rr.a"
higher pries, through the aorthiem brown burri bring hidden
or glazed user with the powdered colour. employ ed•
I.OOPCICII PULVONIC Wariest —Extract of • letter free!
Mr. J. Freud, chemist. Dorelimier. • • tleutlencit—lia.
Just retvised the 1..11..• ing, I beg to hamt it to vou, as a further
proof id the eneellence .4 Dr. Locock's rulnionle Warn. •hr!.
! are generally spoken of in this neighbourhood In terve of the
higlie•t commendation. A gentleman, • clew -Mali, C*11.4
me this aftennmn, and expremed himself • ith much pk...00'
of the decided benefit his sister hail received from the
She had been for mune rears the subject of a most diArew•!l
cough. The remodici.wmally ouploved by the 1.r01e...40u h±:d
! not auearded in affording relief: other nswedW' me" re" 6 LI
to, reppectiog ibid. the daily pre tell .1 ondrous UK.
only ocimal..nal and temporary cam • a,. obtained ; but
trying your preparation, Dr. L.w.ck's Wafers. held'
I almost haidautly derived, and by a little steady Pew'
the emgh, which can before distrmingly troubles...et 1.,' Pti.,
icrfixtly cured. I ani, Gentlemen. Jain. Pron.-
gingers and pubiic weakern they are invaluable for clearing
StrtllCUlellillg the video. They have a mod pkaeant
Price la. lid„ Del., End Its. per box. &WI by all clump •
4 wdi
Carnire.—Eviny box of the genuine medl•`..ne has thee.
"DR. LOODeICS WAFERS in rail.. letters ow • red
Ithe Govennuent Stamp, mal aithoilt aan
gOlArrirl/Llll AID AJ 111ZUSITtull.