The Press.
London, England, 1855-07-21 00:00:00

THE PRESS.

THE PREMIER'S FLEDGE.
lam quite ready to yield my position if there are men more capable. But till that is shown,
and I confess that conviction bee not yet come to my miud—(4tughter)—we shall Dud it our
duty, dc. ttc.—Lord Palmerston, July 19th.
Till you find a smart Orator, gifted with skill
" To wield the fierce democrats " here, " at his will,"
Who can bluster and bawl, when such tactics are best,
But prefers to accomplish his end with a jest,
And whose name is convertible diction for " Face,"
I shall do my endeavour to stick to my place.

Till you find an Old Gentleman, badgerly grey,
Who's rebuked for his levity, day after day,
Yet, unable to check his affection for " chaff,"
Is perpetually setting his traps for a laugh,
And angles for jokes like a cockney for dace,
I shall do my endeavour to stick to my place.

Till you find a Divine who confounds wheat with tares,
Who revises, off-hand, all your creeds and your prayers,
While " truths." both " divine " and discovered, are flung
" Amended "—or altered at least—" from his tongue,"
And who whips up Religion to Intellect's pace,
I shall do my endeavour to stick to my place.

Till you find a Reformer, who, loud in his pledge,
Is skilled from improvement to take off the edge,
And, raising a lather of very soft soap,
Keeps faith to the ear while he baffles the hope,
And affects to run fair, though he's selling the race,
I shall do my endeavour to stick to my place.

Till you find a bold Liberal who's preached to the nation
Of aristocratical pride and dictation,
Yet, snapping engagements, like Samson his cords,
Constructs his own Cabinet solely of Lords
(A party, where loving relations embrace),
I shall do my endeavour to stick to my place.

Till you find a Diplomatist, quick at a taunt,
And almost unrivalled at swagger and vaunt,
Yet used, when combining with men of more force,
And baffled, when seeking a separate course,
Who will play the deuce when he should play the ace,
I shall do my endeavour to stick to my place.

Till you find a Prime Minister, brisk as a bee,
Who " managed " his way to the top of the tree,
And still (like another gay creature we know)
The higher he climbs, the less graceful the show ;
Till, in short, of remarkable birds there's a brace,
This bird is determined to stick to his place.

TO THE AUTHOR OF
"WHOM SHALL WE HAN G?"
Whom shall we bang ? Newcastle ? Aberdeen ?
They're hung for ever on the shelf, 1 ween.
Whom shall we hang? Lord John, whom none defends?
No, leave him to the mercy of his friends.

Shell we hang Palmerston? or shall we save
Thet witless Falstaff for a peaceful grave?

Shall we hang gentle Herbert? On my word
His hangers-on are better worth a cord!
Whom shall we hang? The rogue must not escape.
Shall we hang Frederick Peel in new red tape?

Shall we hang—Bah ! you wretched, twaddling elf,
To and your queries—why not hang yourself ?

IN ATTORNEY IN PARLIAMENT.

THE foihwing paragraphs from the special plea put in, upon Thursday night, by the
prinopal legal adviser of the Government, escaped the reporters, and have been since
suppled. They so strikingly resemble the remainder of the address in spirit and
planter that there can be no doubt of their authenticity.

The ATTORNEY-GENERAL (in continuation): And now, Sir, having
pleadedestoppel, as a reason why no proceedings should be instituted
against ny clients, her Majesty's Government, iu respect to the mis-
managenent of the Russian war, it becomes my duty to plead the Statute
of Limitations, or Lamentations, as it is facetiously called. Hon.
members may object that this statute only applies to cases where there
has been a neglect to sue for seven years; and so it does. But if the
plaintiff Roebuck has no right to bring his action now) or at all,