The Liverpool Standard and General Commercial Advertiser.
Liverpool, Merseyside, England, 1855-07-10 00:00:00

SUPPLEMENT TO THE LIVERPOOL STANDARD

one subject of thought that could interest. All ranks
were confounded, all distinctions levelled, all common
forms neglected. Gentlemen and servants, lords and
common soldiers, British and foreigners were all upon
an equality, elbowing each other without ceremony,
and addressing each other without apology. Ladies
accosted men they had never before seen with eager
questions, unhesitatingly; strangers conversed together
like friends, and English reserve seemed no longer to
exist. From morning till night the great Place de
_Mire was completely filled with people, standing
under umbrellas, and eagerly watching for news of the
battle. So closely packed was this anxious crowd,
that when viewed from the hotel windows nothing
could be seen but one compact mass of umbrellas. As
the day advanced the consternation became greater.
The number of terrified fugitives from Brussels, upon
whose faces were marked the deepest anxiety and dis-
tress, and who thronged in the town on horseback and
on foot, increased the general dismay ; while long rows
of carriages lined the streets, filled with people who
could find no place of shelter.

VARIETIES.

CAN old Port be considered " Elder" wine ?
CAN the farmer who keeps good sheep be said always to
enjoy fine `!wether _

Tim failings of a good man are commonly more published
abroad than any of his good deeds.
THlGmurrarmAs who kissed a lady's "snowy brow" caught
a severe told, and has been laid up ever since.
WO3iAN'S RIGHTS.—A good-natured husband, a dozen
children; and a happy home.
MRS. PARTINGTON fears that the people in California will
bleed to Ileath, as every paper she picks up announces
" another vein opened."
SINCERITY is to speak as we think, to do as we pretend and
profess, to perform and make good what we promise, and really
to be what we would seem and appear to be.—Tillotson.
b THE CONSCIENCE. The conscience is the most elastic
material in the world. To-day you cannot stretch it over a
mole-hill—to-morrow it hides a mountain.
"SEVEN YEARS' FIGHTINO," says Jeremy Taylor, "sets
a whole kingdom back in learning and virtue, to which they
were creeping, it might be, a whole age."
A TRADESMAN having sunk his floor a couple of feet,
announces that, " in consequence of recent improvements,
goods will be sold considerably lower than formerly."
A LOVER, writing to his sweetheart, says:—" Delectable
dear—You are so sweet, that honey would blush in your pre-
sence, and molasses stand appalled."
RECEIPT FOR MAKING A PERSON USEFUL—Do every-
thing in its proper time ; keep everything in its proper use;
and put everything in its proper place.
AN ORIENTAL PROVERB.—You can't prevent the birds of
sadness from flying over your head, but you may prevent them
from stopping to build their nests there.
THE most "Telling" Scene in the opera of William Tell,
says the Picayune, is where they tell Tell to tell Jimmy Tell
to tell Mrs. Tell that he (Tell) cannot tell when he will he
home.

THE following distich over the door of a barber's shop shows
at once the utility and the poetry of the honest shaver :

"Stumps and teeth drawn in a trice,
Threepence a piece, and that's the price."

A SAILOR meeting an old messmate, whom the world had
frowned a little upon, asked him where he lived ? " Where I
live," said be, " I don't know ; but I starve towards Wapping
and that way."
A Poore YANKEE, on being asked the nature of his dis-
tresses, replied—" That he had five outs and one in—to wit,
out of money, and out of clothes • out at the heels and out at
the toes ; out of credit and in debt."

DEFINITIOICS. Alcohol, contractor for coffins. Tem-
perance, eating to live.—Bad temper, a jar of household
vinegar.—Gossip, society's scavenger.—Equivocation, half-way
to lying.—Suspicion, the mother of jealousy.
LADIES' BONNETS are, it would seem, about to disappear
altogether, for the Magazin Francais. says" the new shapes
are even smaller than they were last spring."
A FACT.—What is stronger in death than in life? An old
yellow-legged hen. If you don't believe it, try to dissect one
after boiling.
AIINT BETSY has said many good things; amongst the rest,
that a newspaper is like a wife, because every man ought to
have one of his own.

A PROBER3I FOR THE CURIOUS.—If three barley-mows
make a haystack, how many pairs of bagpipes will make a
kettle drum ? _ _

THE DIFFERENCE.—When Barnley told Bill " he was look-
ing quite ill," Bill stuck to his habit of impudent joking—
" that's the difference," quoth he, " betwixt you and me—that
I am looking ill, and that you are ill-looking !"
LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP.--Love is the shadow of the morn-
ing, which decreases as the day advances. Friendship is the
shadow of the evening, which strengthens with the setting
sun of life.

MET did you not pocket some of those pears ?" said one
boy to another: "nobody was there to see." " Yes there
was—l was there to see myself? and I don't ever mean to see
myself do a mean thing r

CURIOSITIES. A daguerreotype representation of the
waning honeymoon. Some feathers which were lost during a
flight of fancy. An apiary from which the drones of society
have been expelled. _ _ _

. _
A NOVEL STYLE.—A young lady, found one day reading a
novel, was asked by a gentleman how she liked the style ? Re-
viewing the incidents in her memory, she replied, "The style?
the style ?-011 ! Sir, I am not come to that yet."
TIIE application of the Scotch proverb, " Mony littles mak
a mickle," has met with an illustration in a public office in
America, where the clerks have been directed not to dot their
i's nor cross their t's, by which a considerable saving of ink
has been effected.

How TO RECEIVE CRITICISM.—As for the Quarterly Re-
view, I have not read it, nor shall I, nor ought I—where
abuse is intended, not for my correction, but my pain. I am,
however, very fair game ; if the oxen catch the butcher, they
have a right to toss and gore him.—Rev. Sydney Smith.
ENCOURAGING.—A young gentleman having made some
progress in acquiring a knowledge of Italian, addressed a few
words to an organ grinder in his purest accent. He was
astonished at receiving the following response—" I no speak
Inglis."
A MISTAKEN COMPROMISE.—In the Court of Common
Pleas on Saturday, in the course of an action, in which a com-
promise had been sought, the defendant, an old lady and very
deaf, was asked what she would take, when she replied, "A
glass of warm ale."
AN AGE OP PROGRESS.—In Winchester, United States,
Mr. John Wysong informs the citizens that he has associated
with him in the mercantile business his daughter Virginia,
and that hereafter business will be conducted under the style
and firm of J. Wysong and Daughter.—American paper.
SCOTCIIMEN cut their eye-teeth afore they ever set foot in
this country, I expect. When they get a bawbee they know
what to do with it, that's a fact. They open their pouch, and
drop it in • and it's got a spring like a fox trap—it holds fast
to all it gets, like grim death to a dead nigger.—Sant Slick.
A RIDDLE.—The following, riddle is said to be the last
production of Sheridan's witty pen :—" Sometimes with a
head ; sometimes with a tail, sometimes without a tail; some-
times with head and tail, sometimes without either; and yet
equally perfect in all situations.—Answer—A Wig.
HE that is well employed in his duty, though he may seem
to do nothing, does the greatest thing of all others. He lays
down precepts for the governing of our lives, and the modera-
tion of our passions ; and obliges human nature, not only in
the present, but in all succeeding generations.
EXPANSIVE BENEVOLENCE.—The following sentence has
been ascribed to Fenelon I love my family better than
myself ; my country better than my family ; and mankind
better than my country ; for I am more a Frenchman than a
Fenelon ; and more a man than a Frenchman."
AN ILLITERATE PERSON, who always volunteered to "go
round with the hat," but was suspected of sparing his own
pocket, overhearing once a hint to that effect, replied, " Other
gentlemen puts down what they thinks proper, and so do I:
charity's a private concern, and what I gives is nothing to
nobody."
A LITTLE GIRL, about five years old, heard a ranting
preacher praying most lustily, till the roof rang with the
strength of his supplication. Turning to her mother, and
beckoning the maternal ear down to a speaking place, she
whispered, " Mother, don't you think that if he lived nearer
to God he wouldn't have to talk so loud ?"

OF all the miseries a man can meet in this world, that of a
beautiful, capricious, fiery-tempered, fainting wife, is the most
to be feared. Don't learn to faint. You are bad enough
already ; don't become worse, or you will become a deserted
wife as sure as you become a wife at all, unless yon marry an
awful spooney. Learn to check your temper.
HE that resigns his peace to little casualties, and suffers the
course of his life to be interrupted by fortuitous inadverten-
cies or offences, delivers up himself to the direction of the
wind, and loses all that constancy and equanimity which con-
stitute the chief praise of a wise man.
MAN is but a rough pebble without the attrition received
from contact with the gentler sex. It is wonderful how the
ladies pumice a man down into smoothness, who occasion him
to roll over and over with the rest of his species, jostling, but
not wounding, his neighbours, as the waves of circumstances
bring him into collision with them.

MODESTY always sits up gracefully on youth; it covers a
multitude of faults, and doubles the lustre of every virtue which
it seems to hide, the perfections of men being like those
flowers which appear more beautiful when their leaves are
folded up than when they are full blown, and display them•
selves without any reserve to the view.
"Do you cast things here ?" inquired a Yankee, as he
sauntered into a foundry and addressed the proprietor. " You
cast all kinds of things in iron, eh ?" was the next query.
" Certainly, don't you see that is our business ?" "Ah ! well
cast a shadow, will you ?" He was cast out, and referred to
a brass foundry.
A LOGICAL INFERENCE.-"Sleep, like death, is a great
leveller," said ➢ir. B-, yawning, as he closed a large
volume just before retiring; "Plato, while asleep, was no
greater than any other mortal ; ergo, when I'm asleep I'm as
great a man as Plato." " Was Plato, when asleep, think you,
your equal in every respect ?" asked his friend. " Certainly,"
Then he must have been an awful snorer."

AMONGST great numbers of men:who are accounted rich,
there are few that really are so. That man alone is rich who
lives upon what he has, owes nothing, and is contented ; for
there is no determinate sum of money, nor quantity of estate,
that can denote a man rich, since the desire for more is want,
and want is poverty itself,

TEE most trifling actions that aff(
be regarded. The sound of your
morning, or nine at night, heard b;
easy six months longer ; but if he
table, or hears your voice at a tavern.
work, he sends for his money the Ile

A PEDAGOGUE told one of his
Emerald Isle, to spell hostility.
meneed Pat. " Not horse-tility,'
" Sure," replied Pat,
the other day not to say hors
wid ye one day, and another the nix.

LEASE AND RELEASE--An Iris!
in the teeth of evidence. The cowls,
anxious to know how the thing coult
next day addressed himself to one of
formed, had stood out for not guilty.
answered—" Arrah, Mr. —, d(
hanging the last life in my lease ?"
THE AMERICAN CHARACTER.—AII
"We are born in a hurry ; we are
make a fortune with a wave of a
manner, to re-make and re-lose it ii
Our body is a locomotive, travelling
our spirit is a high-pressure engine,
ing star, and death surprises us like
THINGS REQUIRED AND WORTH
of ambition, the depth of soul, the
profundity of knowledge, the mini
Also, what is the proper meaning of
and where it may be bought ? wheth
purchased, the price would be redo'
happy days in question would be w,
climate?
AN AMERICAN WITNESS.—The
I ain't particular, as the oyster said
he'd be fried or roasted.—What do
that comes in my way, as the loco!.
over a little nigger.—What's your bus]
as the cat said when she stole the chic
comes nearer the line, I suppose ? Al,
the rope said when it was chokingf th(
DEATHS AND MARRIAGES.— Ito'
lady writing to the editor of the New
much good the deaths and marriage!'
how I love deaths and marriages,
every paper.—The elopement/LI:1:1'
re
the common deaths and
sti.
cisji:?gewitfl
crowd the married ones
you consulted their hap Pines and
Spanish
A SPANISH PRIES...--
ittf
not
followed
soldiersbosawi
taedtsura h. top
Reflect,fighte
n tsentiment,
to-nighti
mtk, like
theil
nbi orne
fitsh,
g Faradreht
the priest took to his heels, when a
reproachfully referred to the promise
" True, my son, true," said the prig
added,s'
beg.e.
suppers."
Sir WILLIAM OMB had a very lc
on
g au William,bn o
ustingiminega, thsibisracsn
ene.
to keep pace with his intluigA &in
wwhiot
seldomh
makingwoasl d
aG esnnne
continually over the table, anu.,,
with the game, the General said sir
nose." "Blow it yourself," said
you as me."
THE editor of the Buffalo Adver,
immortal by the publication of an in'
ing babies perfectly quiet, the ow'
is as follows :—As soon as the chill
squall, prop it up with pillows and
thick treacle, sticking feathers into thi
the youngster the employment of ply
the one hand and the other, which will
drops asleep again.
=ORIGIN OF THE NAME OF CITA
generally known that the name of
nated from the fond epithet bestowed
his beloved Queen, to whom no less
erected, and from the prevalence of
that time, Charing being no other thall,
Reyne (dear Queen), often applied by
of course the cross gave the name of the

INCLEDON AMONG} THE HORSES.
familiarly called " Dickey Suett," one
at Tattersall's, asked him if he had col
cledon said he had ; but having no
ment in horse-flesh, inquired " What
you think you should know a horse
doubt," replied Suett, quickly, " I'd
among a thousand horses."

NEWSPAPERS ECCENTILICITIES.
curiosities in the columns of the Tim,
with some startling announcements.
" a mahogany child's chair" was offered
belonging to a lady with a piebald
commit a great many blunders, as t)-
show :—A New Orleans editor recordingdog, says, "We are grieved to say tha
it could be killed, severely bit Dr. Hart
" For sale, an excellent young horse
lady or gentleman with a long silver
Eastern paper expresses great indigni!'„
which a woman was buried who commll't,
" She was buried like a dog with her cloth