The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1878-11-30 00:00:00

Visrelt auczxt Jnllitnte.l

HOME, FOREIGN, AND COLONIAL.

WICK-WHACS-EDNESS.--Why are naughty childrr
like stair carpets ?—Because neither can be kept va
order without the rod,—Judy.
BRIGHTON PLEABURR-DRIVE.—It has been the cut' "
tom for several years to count on some afternoon ig
November the number of pleasure vehicles passing.'
selected spot on the road along the cliff at Brighton to
ten minutes. Inspector Dumfries took the necessarl
steps for making the count one afternoon last weekt
and it was ascertained that 256 such carriatzes passed
in the ten minutes between 340 and 350. The number
was 154 in 1858, and 248 in 1868.

A SHIP DESTROYED BY FlRE.—Lloyd's agent at
Bayonne, in a letter dated November 21, reports that
the French vessel Melanie, laden with 600 barrels Of
petroleum, moored in Boncau Roads, Bayonne, await'
ing fine weather to enable her 'to cross the bar, took
fire at six pm. on November 20, and continued burn"
ing until eleven p.m. The vessel and cargo were
totally destroyed. The crew, with the exception of
the ship's boy, were saved. The master, Peter Sharp,
and a sailor named James M'lntosh, of the Annabella
Clark, of Ardropsan, were injured in rescuing two men
from the burning vessel.

ON DANGEROUS GROUND.—Archie. Auntie, what'a
a torpedo?—Auntie. Something that blows something
up, my love.—Archie. Then are you a torpedo,
auntie?— Auntie. No, my dear. Why ?—Archie.
Because I heard uncle telling pa you were alwaYo
blowing him up.—Judy.
A HEREFORDSHIRE CENTENARIAN.—Mrs. Webb, of
Ledbury, widow of the late Mr. Thomas Webb,
banker, and deputy lieutenant of Herefordshire,
reached her hundredth birthday on Monday. She ig
the only surviving sister of the late Sir Joseph Thack•
well, one of the heroes of Waterloo. Records in
Berrow Church, near Ledbury, furnish proof. Mrs.
Webb still enjoys good health, and on Monday she
entertained a gathering of her relatives at her real'
dence.

THE HARD-HEADED BREED.—Sympathising by-
standers (about an unfortunate man who has been
knocked down and stunned by the train). "Poor
man! Take hjm to the station—" Injured one (re•
covering). " yek me to th' station? What for,
then? If aw've dune ony harm yo yo'r engine, awl
willin to pay for't ! "—Punch.
TRICHINOUS PORK.— The Provincial Council Of
Silesia has determined to extend rigorously the officia
inspection of all fresh or cured pork offered for sale or
consumption to every part of the province (says the
Veterinary Journal). Every one killing a pig, or
having one killed for him, is bound to have the meet
miacroscopically examined by an official inspector, and
may neither use nor sell it, nor permit it to be used or
sold, unless furnished with a certificate of its freedorn
from disease, nor unless each joint of the carcase if;
branded with an official stamp bearing letters and
numbers corresponding with those on the face of the
certificate. The fee payable for such miscroscopic ex.
amination is fixed at one shilling for each pig.

LONGEVITY.—The obituary of The Times of MondaY
contained several remarkable illustrations of prolonged
life. It recorded the death of six persons—four gentle-
men and two ladies—whose united ages amounted t°
537 years, the average being 89 years and six months.
The oldest was a lady, who had reached the great a.ge
of 96 years. The oldest gentleman was 92. Of
septuagenarians, there were 10 whose united ages
amounted to 752 giving an average of 75 years and
two months.

ADTICE TO THE GAS COMPANIES (easier given than
taken) APROPOS OF THE ELECTRIC LIGHT.—Don't be
put out by it.''—Punch
AGITATION FOR WOMEN'S RIGHTS.—In Salt Lake
City the non-Mormon women are agitating for
Women's Rights—that is, for woman's right to an
undivided man. In an address to Mrs. Hayes tke
wife of the President, they say :—" Our Legislative el
composed almost entirely of polygamists and members
of the Mormon priesthood, and they have thrown
around polygamy every possible safeguard in their
power. The right of dower has been abolished, ..te
break down the distinction between the lawful ivue
and the concubine. The Mormons are rapidly extend-
ing their settlements into Arizona, Idaho, NeW
Mexieo, and Wyoming. They have the balance of
power in two territories, and are without doubt plot-
ting for it in others. We call upon Christian women
of the United States to join us in urging Congress te,
empower the Courts to arrest the further progress 01
this evil, and to delay the admittance of Utah into
Statehood matit this is accomplished."
MOST ABSIIRD.—CIerk. Single? Mrs. Coobiddi
(only married a fortnight ago). What do
No! That is—yes, please. —Judy.
JOSKPH'S BONES.—In London, on Sunday evening.
the Rev. George Dale Copeland, 8.D., vicar of St.
Stephen's, Walworth, in the course of an interesting
sermon upon the words "Ye shall carry up my hones
from hence" (Gen. 50 chap. 25 v.), said that there
was one object of strange interest to be found among
that travelling nation proceeding from Egypt 0,
Canaan, over 3,000 years ago. It was never parte°
with during the 40 years' wandering in the desert,
but religiously cared for and carried through all vicissi-
tudes—it was a mummy, the embalmed form of one
of their ancestors; a sacred trust which Joshua de-
posited in Shechem, in a parcel of ground bought bY
Jacob. In that same tomb, though now in Maho-
medan hands, it was believed the same sarcophagus,
with its mummied form, was still concealed; and be
thought it just as likely, considering our growing in'
fluence in the East, that as the Needle which prO-
bably Joseph's eyes had looked upon, reposed on the
banks of the Thames, so the precious mummy of the
son of Pharoah's daughter might some day repose in
the British Museum.

ETHICAL APHORISM.—If you steal but lb single
plank, you take a deal too much.—Fun.
A FISHING FLEET. —Mr. Buckland writes to Land
and Water :—"I do not think that the public in
general have the slightest idea of the enormous indue'
"try that is at the present moment going on in our sere
fishing ports of England. One of the most rising 0.!
these ports is Great Grimsby, where Mr. Walpole Oa
1 held an inquiry not many days since. There are
now sailing out of Great Grimsby no less than 519
fishing-smacks, some trawlers, some longline men:
These represent a huge capital of money and a vas'
amount of industry of our brave fellow-coutrymen•
The spectacle of the whole of the fish-wharf covered.
for the morning's market, with the sea fish fresh
caught of every kind, is truly wonderful."

DISCOVERY OF ANTIQUE RELICS.—III London, ',Oll
Saturday, a number of labourers were engaged in ex'
cavating on the freehold ground of Mr. Gifford Brid-
port, near Earl's-court, Kensington, for the purpose uf
deepening the foundation for brick arches, when to
their surprise a large iron box was unearthed, which
was found to contain various Roman and Druidical
religious relics and war implements, consisting of
short sword with a battle scene indented in the blade,
a club, a long dagger, and part of a suit of armour.
The articles will in all probability be presented to the
Sonth Kensington Museum,
AN AUTHORITY.—Page. The doctor will be dir
engaged in a few moments. Er—what is the matter
with you.—Patient. I have no appetite. Page. That's
bad !—Judy.
TRE CAPTURE OF LARGE SALMON.—From the re;
tarns which have been published at the captures °
monster salmon during the past season, it appearsthat,
although several splendid fish were landed, the take,
when compared with that of former years, has WI
been particularly remarkable (says the Pall
Gazette.) The Tay, Tweed, and Shannon, as usual.
produced a number of big ones; while from some of
our English waters were taken salmon which, if the",
did not come exactly under the denomination
"monsters," were at any rate remarkably fine spa°.
mens. The Tay produced the champion fish of the
season. It was tam in the nets in May last, ahj
scaled 601 b. Another fine fish weighing 524FP•
was also taken in the nets on the Tay. Angle°
on various waters landed fish of 401 b. and up'
wards. On the Shannon were landed by the rods 008
of 42 lb., one of 41 lb., one of 40 lb; in the Tay on!
of 42 lb.; in Loch Tay one of 42 lb. and one of 40 lvi•
A number of other good fish ranging in weight froo3
40 lb. to 30 lb. were taken on various rivers throughout
the kingdom by angler!; but the number collectivelY
was far below the capture made during several formes'
season,.

REWARD OF GALLANTRY,—The Royal Human°
Society has voted a bronze medallion to Mrs. DisneY
Roebuck, wife of Captain Disney Roebuck, of the 401,,
Regiment, who, with the help of her sister, gallant
saved the lives of three ladies who ran a narrow escaPe
of drowning while bathing at Broadstairs in the earli
part of last month.
ABSENT-MODEDNESS.—Aniongst the instances -A
blunders from absent mind are the following
clergyman walking one day in the country, fell inr
thought. He was so accustomed to ride that when n°
found himself at a toll, he stopped and shouted to the
man "Here, what's to pay ? " "Pay for whatr
asked the man. "For my horse," said the clergynnerls
"What horse? There's no horse, sir !" " Bless 2n.82.
exclaimed the clergyman looking down between Ws
legs "I thought I was on horseback ! " Sydney Sinitlit
was not in general absent-minded, but In says WA'
once, when calling on a friend in London, and being
asked by the servant, " Who shall I say has called? D°
could not for the life of him recollect his own nanie'
t
and stared in blank confusion at the man .I °
eat
some time before it came back to him. The o—f
Lord Lyttelton was very absent. It is declared c'
him that when he fell into the river by the upsetting
of a boat at Hagley, "he sank twice before he recl.
lected he could swim." A New York paper gives e
following story in illustration of the absent-mind
nem of the great Jonathan Edwards. When CO.-a
riding one day, a little boy very respectfully hove,'
and opened a gate for him. "Whose boy are you, ,1331,
little man?" he asked. "Noah Clark's boy, e.,`rie
was the answer. On the return of Edwards the
boy appeared and • ope.ned the gate for him. ll°
thanked the little fellow, and again asked, " Wh°6s:
boy are you?" "Noah Clark's, sir; the same n3e33Af
boy I was a quarter of an hour ago, sir."—A Book '
Blunders.
LORD HENRY SCOTT, M.P., AT BOTLEy,--,Spenkle
at Botley on Monday Lord Henry Scott, ALP, Enl%i
tamed that whatever differences of opinion we inig
have upon the Berlin Treaty, that treaty should be
garded as an honest effort on the part of the EuroPB a
Powers to settle the Eastern Question, and he belieXeb„
a pacification would result if its provisions were
fully executed; but if it was to be regarded merelYara
a stepping-stone to further aggression, war 111° ce
again ensue. He thought we should have confidenbe
in the recent declaration of honest intention bY
Russian Emperor, though he had not much trio 1,••
Russian dealing. In regard to the war with Algll2g:
istan, he thought that all who had read or knew en;',E;
thing of the transactions with the Ameer must he
seen that war was unavoidable. The Government
taken the earliest opportunity of consulting Perlii.
ment, and the papers when submitted would enabo.
the country to form a sound judgment upon. the rhs I
Mon. He regretted, however, that the conduct o
Ministry was to be embarraksed, as it was serloup2;
clueing the Russian and Turkish war, by the fornast,lf:
of ex-parte committees? and it was a pity Mutt
word patrictiplowe
gonid !int be made to reidtnd rovtic.
In the eve cif t taints at'Ung.