The Dorset County Express and Agricultural Gazette.
Dorchester, Dorset, England, 1862-07-08 00:00:00

LITERARY EXTRACTS.

JOKES ABOST JIJDOEIL—A judge having fallen asleep,
the president of the court, who was taking the opinions
of his brethren, asked him for his. "Hang him!"
hang him r said the roused sleeper. "But it concerns
• meadow!" returned the surprised president. "Now
it! mow it!" cried the other. There is a somewhat
similar story extant of • Scottish judge, whe, laying
been asleep, wakened up just as the counsel pleading
happened to say, "Now, my lord, there is a lion en the
property."—" If there is a lion on the property," inter-
rupted the somnolent judge, to show that he was
attending to the case. "decidedly it ought to be
chained." A young judge, newly appointed to an
Inferior court, having had a cut-riurse before him, was
told that the criumal should be condemned to lose an
ear. He accordingly drew up the sentence himself, and
next court day proceeded to resi it: "We have
condemned, and hereby do condemn, the said criminal
to have his ear out off."—" Which ear I" asked the
prisoner, sharply. The judge, taken by surprise,
replied, touching one of his own ears, "Why this
one."—" Very well, very good," said the criminal, "I
shall not appeal; and what is more, I will cut it off
myself, if you like!"
UNDER THE SNOW. --la the severe winter of 1708-9,
a poor woman, near Yeovil, in Somersetshire, having
been to Chard to sell some of her home-spun yarn, was
returning home, whoa, falling ill by the wayside, she
requested to be allowed to set by the Are in a cottage.
This being unfeelingly refused, she lay down under a
hedge in the open air, being too weak to proceed
farther. Snow soon caine on. A neighbour passed by,
and helped for a few moments to guide her steps; but
her strength soon failed her, and he, in like manner,
left her to her fate. Once more laid prostrate, she
became gradually covered with the snow. Day after
day paned, for a whole week, daring which time her
friends made search and inquiry for her in every
direction. The only person who could give informa-
tion was the man who had abandoned her, after her
failure in the attempt to walk; and he remained silent,
last his conductshould bring reproaches on him. There
then occurred one of those strange sleep-revelations
which, explain them how we may, are continually
reported as playing a part in the economy of human
life. A poor woman dreamed that the missing person
lay under a hedge in a particular spot denoted. The
neishbours, roused by the narration she gave, sallied
forth with sticks, which they thrust thruagh the snow
in various ;daces. One of them thought he heard a
groan ; be thrust again in a particular spot, when a
feeble voice cried out, 'Oh, for God's sake, don't kill
me!' The poor, imprisoned wayfarer was taken out,
to the astonishment of all. 'She was found,' says the
writer of the letter, 'to have taken great part of her
upper garment for sustenance; but how she could have
digested a textile fabric of wool or flax is not easy to
understand. She surprised her neighbours by the
assertion that she had lain very warm, and had slept
most part of the time. One of her legs lay just under
a.bush, and was not quite covered with snow • this be-
came in consequence frost-bitten, but not kW) far for
recovery. Her spirts revived. and gm was able
shortly to resume her ordinary duties.'—Chambers'aßook
of Dar&