The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1878-08-24 00:00:00

JOCULAR CUTTINGS FROM AMERICAN

PAPERS.

Missionary societies, by means of the phonograph,
tan have sermons canned and sent to the Cannibal Islands.
The natives can't eat the sermons, and therefore have the
taoral and religious without the physical part of the
Missionary.
Josh Billings says, "I like the statoos better'n I do
the picterg. I kin go all round the statoos, but I kin only
see one side of the picters."

It is not a significant sign of the frivolity of the
times that in Petaluma the other day two funerals were
adjourned half an hour to see a circus procession pass?
A Connecticut woman was appointed constable the
Other day, and the first thing she said was " Now I shall
eatch a man."
It is related that a western tourist, to whom an
Italian monk was recently showing a consecrated lamp,
Which had never gone out during five centuries, gave the
flame a decided puff, and remarked with cool complacency,
Well, 1 guess its out now,"
When a woman commits suicide in New York, the
reporters perpetrate head-lines about "A beautiful woman
forcing the portals of the unknown world."
At St. Louis, when a high-pressure steamer,
crowded with passengers, burst, it is called "elevating the
assumes."
As the sun in all its splendour was peeping over the
*astern hillsoksays a Yarkee paper, a newly-married man ex-
elaimed, Tne glory of the world is rising " His wife, who
happened to be getting up at that moment, taking the com-
pliment to herself, simpered out, "What would you Bay,
clear, if I had my silk gown on?"
A Missouri paper, in giving an account of the
funeral of a little boy who was killed by being run over by
a railroad train, says :—" The funeral ceremonies were
Solemn and impressive, and well calculated to warn chil-
dren of the danger of playing about railroads
A Kentucky steam-packet captain, while dilating
.011 the excellence of his craft, says "She trots off like a
horse—all boiler—full pressure—it; hard work to hold her
In at the wharves and landing. I could run her up a cata-
Tract She draws eight inches of water—goes at three knots
a minute, and jumps all the snags and sandbanks."
Yonkers had a fourth Of July orator, who said:
"Mad while the heart of the nation continues to throb,
While the hollyhock of liboarft ssinaulates its fragrance over
the acia of our domain, while Thegratitilde.fif, tW,lffes-'bern
tons of soil—l mean sons of toil—recalls the heroism of
those who bought and fled—excuse me, I should have said
taught and bled—for us, so long will we cherish the noble
&welly bequeathed to us by our bat-riotic posterity

THE SOCIAL STATUS Or A SOLDIER.

On the above subject The Times publiiihes the following
letter

Sir,—ln defence of my cloth I crave space for the
insertion of the following plea on behalf of the status
of the British soldier. I went last week to one of the
principal cavalry stations in the South of England to
see a young friend, who, like many other gentlemen of
late, had enlisted in the ranks of a cavalry regiment,
with a view of ultimately obtaining a commission.
We went to lunch at one of the chief hotels in the
town, and had not been five minutes in the coffee.
room before the waiter requested that we should retire
to a private room, as the company, which appeared
to consist principally of farmers, it being a market
day, had objected, or would object, I forget
the exact words, to my friend's uniform.
Surely this unjust and absurd prejudice against
Her Majesty's uniform, worn by men who have to
fight their country's battles, is greatly to be deplored,
and should be combated whenever practicable. On
the Continent the costume of a soldier is a passport to
all public resorts, where the tariff of admission is often
cheapened for him, and in many places he is further
privileged to travel at a lower rate than civilians in all
public conveyances; but then his garb and calling are
respected and he is not made to feel a sort of social
Pariah. How can the status of the British soldier ever
be raised if his very uniform is, as it were, a token of
disgrace in place of honour? How can a man take
pride in his profession when he finds his presence among
civilians scouted, and himself considered as though
unworthy to come "betwixt the wind and their
nobility ?" If, in lieu of this virtual ostracism of the
soldier from all respectable places of resort, his pre-
sence there were encouraged, we might soon hope for
a far higher tone throughout the ranks, and our
guard-rooms would not be full of men who, in search
of recreation, find only the lowest haunts open to
them, wherein they speedily become poison both
mentally and physically. Those recruited from the
dregs of the people would then have an opportunity
to socially raise themselves, and those joining from the
respectable classes would not go down the hill, as is,
unfortunately, but too often now the case.

At the present juncture, when suitable recruits for
the ranks are at a premium, and very many regimental
commanding officers are at their wits' end to find effi-
cient non-commissioned officers, on account of the
unwillingness of the men to accept promotion, such a
want of consideration on the part of civilians does not
tend to elevate the honourable profession of a soldier
in the eyes of the million.

Apologising for thus lengthily trespassing on your
valuable space, I remain, Sir, yours obediently,
A LINE OFFICER.

The above letter has evoked several in reply, amongst
others, the following :

Sir,—All the better class of rank and file will, I am
sure, cordially endorse the remarks of "A Line
Officer" in The Times of to-day. I think, however,
that public prejudice against the cloth is not likely
to diminish as long as officers, from the General
commanding downwards, make it a practice to dis-
card their uniform the moment they are off duty,
as if they were ashamed to be seen in private life in
the livery of their profession. If a soldier on leave
wears mufti, he does so at the risk of being arrested on
a charge of attempted desertion. Were soldiers of all
ranks equally forbidden to appear in mufti, the pre-
judice against the uniform, which really begins in the
service, might gradually case.—l am, Sir, yours
obediently, SENTRY-BOX.

Sir,—" A Line Officer "writes to complain that he
and a friend of his, a private in a Cavalry regiment,
were turned out of a public dining-room. Was he in
uniform like his friend? From the context of the letter
I should say not. According to the etiquette of the
Army, it is not proper for the officers to sit down at
the same table with their men or to associate with
them. The public have the same prejudices as the
officers; let the officers set the example, and the
public will follow suit.—l am, Sir, your obedient
servant, FULL PRIVATE.