The Dorset County Express and Agricultural Gazette.
Dorchester, Dorset, England, 1883-12-25 00:00:00

CHRISTMAS NUTS.

Wby does B proud. 0 ia the alphabet I—Bectause you
must be before you can see.
Why a-e detsct,ves ono losk alter coiner@ like •Ohrist-
ins, delicacy t —Stomas they sre Nut spies.
Why la • baby like a new Au:mei I—Because it shrinks
Ire.. washins.
. . _ . . .

What is that which everyone wishes to have, sad which
siveryone wishes to set rid of directly he °blase it I—A.
Rood &Meta&
What pert of grammar is remorse 1-Byntax.
When d 0... clock calomel itsaf I—What it pie behind
time.
. .

.—ilibich saimal bee the snort property to carry with him
when be inbred; and which two have the Meet I—The
elephant the most. Wanes he curies a trunk. The too
and rock the least, ee they have only a brush and comb
betwikn them.

ow many sticks go to We building of • crow's nest !
N 0..; Way are all carried to it
Why gees It daimon (knee, t alone on big deeeit island
—Because Chris wee • binvy &writ on the beach. and •
littie cove running up into Lb. land.

i-e-Micenering to company liked • forged bask-note!
—Et eau. It 11l et', rid. hut 1301adQwed (Wood).
Willett is heavier. • hell or a f ill me ,n I—The belt,
became the tell mem is s lieht spars.
tiVy is goo.berry Mai like comtirfeit morrty
Because it is not eurr mit (current"
If your uncle's suitor is not your suet, what relation
doer she beet to you I—She is your moll., r.
When 1.. eallor not. B.loll—When he is aloft
What simile wird would ice put down for £4O bor-
ron from you I—Excellent (XL lett).
Describe • snit of old clothes is two waters I—C D.
Whin is a sobject btimeth one's notice I—When it is
under consideration.

What relatio,i is your Fibers only brother's sisterdn-
law to you I—Your mother.
Who lath. man who always pute his best foot fi rward
—The mud-aged man.
Why are bechalors like nat.ves of Ceylon I Because
they are single ke'• (Cingelepe),
I.Thr is • condemned malefaltor Ilk* the root of the
tongue I—Ho to down in the mouth.
by is • thief is a garret like an honest man I—B manse
he is above doing • bed action.
Why is a tired man like • thief at large I—B cause he
needs ' • reeting frosting).
Why are keel steel like pens, Ink, and pap r I—Beakless
th.y are eta ionary fetetiolieryk
by is a tb, ologic.lstudent like a march tut I—Because
he .tudies the Prophets (,r
Why is • ship the politeet thing in the world I—Because
she always siva= a with • bow.
Why Is • star like the smallest sole lit ciroolytion /
Because it la • tar thing (farihier)
Why Is a sudden cud violent sound like • goldsmith f
B-cause it woke. the * ear-ring"
When is • man thinner than • lath —When he is a
shaving.
Whet is It that a cat tea bet no other animal hes I
Yittana.
What kind f sweetnees wies there in the ark I—Pre-
served pain.
At what time of the day wit A lain born I—A lit.
before 800.
Why is • clerk like • hen I—Becalm' he is nearly always
scratching.
What tree usually steeds number four anywhere I—ivy
(la
what did Job's wardrobe consitt of I—Thros wretched
comforter..

What instrument of war does the eactls resemble f—A revolver.
Whea is • 'Sayer like • doakey I—When be is drawing
• conveyance.
liotr kkgh ought a Isrly to wear her dress I—A litte
higher than two feet
When should a puhlican got. an iroo-foundry I—When
ht wants • barmaid
What is the mort warlike nation I—Veceinetion.
Rican's it is always in arms
Why is • hen fitting en a gtte Iffee • Penny I—K• there le • head on one aide and a tail on the °the,.
What would a pig do who wished to build himeelf a
hehltation f —Tie • knot In 11. tail and call it • pig's•tie.
Why cannot a deaf min he tigally eraiv.cted f—B icatue
it la Dot 1 iselul to condemn • matt eithout • be atlas.
Where did tic ex-eut,near of °series I. dime and
what did be tak • I—it, t t.k • chop at the King. Head.
Why is • r tn p t tke • beehive —B •Catled • tare
Mon is • behold r, and a Itehnlier is • spectator.
Why w•milil • oso-qui m eke the beet generalf—Race me*
be ...aid woke the enemy COMO • I wreath.
Why te empathy like blind man's buff I—Became it Is
ona fell ivr matins feeling for ansehtr.
Why does • baby be" always receive • hearty welcome
In a family I—B ,conse it nevi r coulee swage
Row can • man lose half his ttaderstanding and yet
retain •11 Ma wit I—B, having one of hos lags cat ar.
Why in a gig with a Istotod tall like the ghost ot
Itoodot's Pat I —ltem* 11 boo a lois to untold.