The Dorset County Express and Agricultural Gazette.
Dorchester, Dorset, England, 1865-08-01 00:00:00

Ay lanai)
Ftorric.
1 StiTtr,l

Were very
A ditnoult
reconcile

Col. Start MY OIN of
madam of rim. He (Colonel Earl
heisloi• . 'emery, kelorati:
'avec !have

would be prolonged for many years in happiness.!
1
(Cheers )
The CHAIRMAN then propoked "The health of G. J.
Andrews, 13,-q.," the inder.,t,gable hon. see. of tl,el
Society, and the toast was most cordially received.
Mr. ANDREWS, in responding, adm.tted that he had
used his beat efforts to promote the success of The
society. After some rem q4ts Upon the old eottnty
soc:rty he observed that this aseofinvion was established
in 1840, and its objects were more raz ticularly the re-
warding labourers ter lons, honest, skilful and
faithful- service. Had the society been true ti
its objects? In 1840 there were 29 premiums for
labourers, in 1865 there were 49 • in 1840 there wdre
30 prizes for agriculturists for storrit and corn, end now
there were but 16. It Might be asked where ilid all the
money go? The question was partly answered by the
increased premiums to labourers, ancLeompleted by the
feet of th, ir t eing, through the liberality of the noble-
men and gentlemen of the county, no less than 21 pieces
of plate, each of the value of a offered for competi
don. In conclusion he dwelt upon the kindness and
seal of the committee, and proposed their good eealtlis.
( A pplame. )
Mr. G. J. Wool) responded. After explaining why
he was not an exhibitor that day, be proceeded to speak
on the malt-tax. Alluding to the remarks made by Mr.
Floyer as to the loss of several members who were warm
advocatee for the repeal, .he said he thought
that if the question reeled on the advocacy of any
special persons it would rest on a rotten founda-
tion: He would rather leave the question to be
decided upon its own merits—(hear, hear)--and he
fearlessly staid that as s measure of Free-trade the
repeal of the Malt-Tax ought to be passed, and also in
justice to the agriculturists. But he did not take it
up from selfish motives. He solemnly believed that it
would be for the benefit of the community at large, and
that the poqr man would then be able to get his beer fit i
something like half the price he dould now. He further
argued that the Malt-Tax ought to be repealed in
preference to removing a tax on any article of foreign
produce. He believed that the Malt-Tax would be
repealed in a very few years As to the practicability
of the abrogation of the dnty, he referred to the fact
that £16,000,000 of taxes have been repealed within
the last few years, and said that being the case he
thought it quite within the oompetancv of the Chancellor
of the Exchequer to repeal the whole of the Malt -tax
in two or three years. Ile con.leinned the trifling
measure adopted by Mr. Gladstone either to evade the
question or to throw dirt in the dyes of the farmers.
Let them Strive for the total repeal, and nothing less.
(Hear, hear.) But if Government would give them it
by instalments, let them like reasonable men accept it.
He regarded the Union Chargeability Bill as the inevit-
able result of the legislation of the past few years. He
then directed attention to the fact that an act is passed
towards the close of every session of Parliament to
exempt the Consolidated Fund from rateability
to the relief of the poor, so that if one man
realised £lOO,OOO in business, and invested it in the funds
he was exempted from being rated to the relief of the
poor, but if he invested that money in land he at once
had to pay the poors'-rate, and the other charges based
upon it Rd regarded it as most unfair, and said he
should be elui to hear an explanation of it. Finally, he
supplemented the hon. sect.', remarks, by stating that
, the financial position of the society is satisfactory.
J. FLOM, e'.sq., M.P., made some remarks in reply
, to the observations of Mr. Wood, on the non-charge-
ability of money in the funds to the poors'-rate, pointing
out some of the difficulties with which the subject W. 5
involved, and said it was • question of increasing im-
portance, and one which, he had no doubt, would
occupy the attention of the legislature. At that time he
should give the subject his best attention, and As he
was often amongst his friends in this neighbourhood he
should he glad to have their opinions on the question
and to give expression to them in the House of Parlia-1
ment He concluded by proposing "The health of the
donors of the ceps dittribUted that day."
Mr. Sahel:ins briefly responded.
The CHAIRMAN next proposed "The health of the
President elect for the ensning meeting." If they con-
sidered him as an English gentleman, as a member of
an old (may in Dorset, as a future peer of the upper
Wise in Parliarriept, ile • statesman; and as one who
was always ready to identify himself with all that *a
calculated to promote the good of this his native
county, he felt certain that they would receive him in •
kind, cordial and sincere manner. He had pleasure in
proposing the health of the Hon. W. H. B. Portman,
MP. [Loud applause.)
D. J. ARDRRW9 Esq., proposed "the Press" in
flattering terms, and Mr. A. F. Mitres, of this journal,
responded.
"The Trade and Commerce of the Town of Dor-
chester," and "Our next merry meeting," concluded
the list of toasts, and shortly after the meeting
separated.

MRS. GRUNDY'S NEW DISCOVERY IN
MAGIC IN CONNEXION WITH THE
WEYMOUTH ELECTION.

Date Metattitt littnithitte;-• 21000 I ha' ben
away Oil my travels things has ben turn'd reglar
topey turvy here at Weymouth. In vackt, affairs has
got zo bad, lean zee very clear it 'll take I munts an'
mulcts to put 'em strata agin. It zooms as how all
t' trouble an' panes as I took% avore—an' I didn't
take a little—has been quite drowd away. I spoase as
how't be all a owen to t' degeneracy o' t' age. I
remember my granmother, poor tole, once a tellen I
as how 't children, didn't ate to be half to had when
MI6 wer a gat aa 'em had grit to be wheh I was a
gal; an' it teems to 1, when I looks back to my
childhood's days, as how 1 mit zsy t' came thing o't'
childen now. An' if yer talk to old people 'pon t'
subject yer 'lt find as they 'll gee it as ther opinion
that t' beyi end gels lii tiler young days was
kings and queens to what 'em now appears to
be. It used to be thought as how t' larnen
did it, an' one person once rit—" If nollige
wer a dangerous thing, 'twer volley to be wise."
But larnen, it must be owned, have done tome
good a'ter all. If it have its dark side it ha' also
got its sunshine. 1 OM remember granmother geenn
I a *anion never to go to a theatre. he never
went to a play but once, the zed, an' then zhe got so
fritened the did'nt ha' a good nite's rest vor more than
a vortnight arteroods. ,In t' coorse o' ther &den;
she ted; it thendet'd; an' lighten'cl, an rained so, as
slamoast to put yer in mind o' Noses Ylood, an ther
Was the a Eitton 'pon thotus all t' *bile; thinken as
holt titer all a judgmebt, in bein so wicked AS
gooen ther, an' vancyen how, in gooen whoam, all
her new cloatbs 'nod be spil't. Well, when she
cum'd out she found as how 't hadn't been ranen at
all, an' as how nubdy outside hadn't heard a stroke
thitnder tior teed A Slab Au 4 theft she
got more afeerd than ever, vor zhe felt quite zartin—
an'zhe carried t' improshun to her deathbed—as how
twee all t' dociens o' t' devil. Now, by t' aid o'
books, an ikool-boy Can tel yer how thick yer arti-
fished thundren, an' litnen, an' rine be thaed:
then, in olden times, them as did msaick tricks was
look't 'pon wee equal obborrence by many. I once
heer'd a wold vriend o' mother's say as how,
when she was a giddy, thostlese young 'ooman, the,
wee zome others, went to zee a kunjerer, an' that,
among other tricks as 'im did, he put a apple under
a het; *tell e bat <l,ai thoit't lip gen, Wit
tumbled a pat big loaf ten times as big as t' bat,
an also out vlied a white pidgeon. T' pidgeon
vited roun t' room a yew times an' then zettled
on t' loaf, an' then a long-legged looken perzonage,
drest in black, rued in pon t' stage, pick% t' loaf
and pigeon up in 'is bands, ate run'd away wee 'elm.
Who thick yer man in black was, the never know'd,
hut she zed she allue had a ettry strong 'pinyon pon
t' stibjeekt, trot no the could do whit t' kungerer
did, wee'out bein in beg *ee *atilt, Now;
zince car Davey Brewster an' ether larn'd people has
nit books on majick, dabble tight, witch craft,
an' zitch-like, what appeerd to our vure vathera and
vote mothers to be t' works o' t' winked one, be now
know'd droo t' enlightenment o' larnen, to
prozeed vrom zum natral cause, sum way or other.
But ther be one feenomenon, *Melt be' ben o' free.
?petit odciirrence at our late ilactelitin gg *es to be;
witch no zientiffeck man, as ever I red on, have ever
ben able to :plane. 1 myzelf ha' studied optieks,
majicks, an'many orthat torte o' " an' in
lenakape th' other paintens i know about miten
o' k ahem That blue an' yeller 'll make green, be well
known; but t' Witythuth transoormashuns, ad I zed
tab* be oii-etpltneable. Permit 1, Maester Read-
hitter, to give yer a intande ot too. Well, then WO A
butcher, who'd atlas had red blood a runnen in 'is
vanes. Yen mit try to perdnoe a change by
'nockelashun, but 'twee alias o' no use. Red
blood he alias had had, an' red blood 'ice glue
meant to have. Now 1 shu'd a told yer 'yore,
maiater headhitter, as how "bribery" be toratoh't
out 'o all t' diokshunaries in Wayranth. If yer wer
to open a dickahunry at t' place wher "bribery"
need to sten, yer ood see as how 't be now changed

into " reward vor good conduct." Well, one day,
one o' thick yer good oondnck rewarder!! stumbled
&gen t' red butcher when 'im just touch't t' palm o'
'I. hand we vifty bits o' yeller stuff, when lo I
ahmoast in t' twinkle° o' yer eye, t' butcher turned
as blue as ever yer zeed t' sky! Now what a good
thing it be vor thick yer too people as we doant live
in t' dark ages, when witchcraft and Bich like things
was a hangout matter. But even now, it mebbee,
ther be not a view as would be alamoaet inclind to
zay as how t' butcher or't to be put into t' stooks
vor allowen shill tricks to be played on 'en, to that
'er mit allus, ever arteruds, go by t' cognomen o'
"stocks.' Well, then, in another owe, thick yer
yeller staff had quite • opposite effect, in a vainly
o' two or dree brothers an' ther zoos, amounting alto-
gether to viva voatee, zome o' em as 'ad allus a ben
blue an t'othars speckled wee • vew streaks o' red,
'ad • woodervul .ranavormashun, or !zither • aeries o'
transvormashuna. Pest o' all 'sin smelt • little o'
thick yer yeller stuff an' that turn'd they blue, and
then another chap as "reward, good oondooks"
oome'd along, and he allowed 'em to smell out o' a
bigger litp o' yeller oat. 130. 'lin =wet tiso
,t 14,24.-4 se 0,-*,
. •