The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1871-03-04 00:00:00

CUTTINGS FROM AMERICAN PAPERS.

A Chicago girlailverlive for a hngband with but one
leg, hecetwe the I. In the same pertlicement.

Anna Short was rece, tly married to Robert Story.
A my p'oasant way of making a Short :gory.

Josh Billings gays that opera music -don't have any
more effect on hit thut cabtor oil would on a graven !wage.

11 powcssion i 4 nine points of the law, what is the
tenth ? —Dteatto-point-Inent, acd as Ing as the other the
put together, and ranch nen* emornon.

A married couple in Sdringtield lave not spoken to
each other for years. The man boasts that he has the himpleat
home lo the country. _ _

An elderly PeensylvaniA woman with her daughter,
hooking at the larble ttalu, al Girard, the uther e, ay, a' artied
the byttaLderi by exclaiming, " La, Sally, haw will!e be
was:.

A cfaittniporsiry exdrne, "ft is A nyAt horrible
thltig to die rich !' We promseo ha has tried is, aol Is
Stardom able to mike the dec.aratlou so explicitly.

The foilowing adr,rtoeinent appears in an American
paper:—.• Count 13'smarcle uses Muller's Penny in PeOblet ;
hence he saw thret.q;h LIUIS Napoleon, who rushed blindly
to destruction for want 01 them'.

Dr. Henry Gil,bona bag twill lecturing to t"_ai Young
Baldheada of the Chriatian groilation noon "C ier
We do not see the relation a thw. cheerful cuhterranean
rodents to the busainui of swing soda.

Mr. Bunnell, of T.,:c banarille Aivertiscr, makes
the lo'lcoving announcement . ' the juni, member. ol the
firm M A 0 Bunnell and Sou arrived In towu one week ego
to-day. Weight SI lbs."

The following is a specimen extract from & very able
and exhaustive article on the " ',tette end Ihnelte " in a
Chicago quarterly What I, prasaht is, thereiore, Other-
he. In ielcral, or • niiivarril Bang loi-Otlior, which, be-
ellute Iti. a single. DOUR far Oiher, ts ClOta preprey Betag-
toull .e. That is, the Banishesa of the deteiniinetim sub-
blates the otherness."

A Cowan bootinalctr recently sold a man a pair of
boots. A few d,l. ufterworde the man returned wn In them,
and said be went out to walk when it wee a untie wet, and
the Pole+ come oft "Mine loather, mne Irian I," rephs
the German gent, "ycii didn't ought to walk round wit dcm
D. y leh cavalry boot., made to :ice wit!"
A FISHY STORY.-- The editor of a western paper
has been up in the country tr..utior, and 13 responsible Or
this bib story: "A jovial old gentleman whom we met In
our travel, tAd • stnry [tor the truth of which we do not
vourtj'o Masted° the number of h.:barmen upon tin stream.
'A to A. days he said, • I was croisiog • bridge cv-r
Saitt River when I treed cry name caPeii I looked around
to we who spoke. N., p. rum was in sight, end I was ahout
to pass n, when my eye fell upon a large trout •uscd•og
upon his tall In the river, lockaut as If he had i poki a to we.
'lilt you speak, Mr. trout t' laid!. • l at, dr, sahi 1e ; • I
wish to inquire little hub, way to ll,ckford's Milt 1" I'
said I • Ain't there any other route?' said ho. • Guess not,'
maid I, 'Unless you go by land. Way do you ask "Because
the river taco Dill ef these fish ho kitbag I Can never get up
this way !

THE (ow AND THE CALF.—Jim Mlth Wee a noted
suctionte.. ous day ha won ceiling farm stock. Among the
articles he sold was an helfer, very a.tractsve In her appear-
ance, and constynenly Jim dwelt exteisivey on her many
excellencies, winding up wi.h the el.quence ilnirish that
she was gentle an a 44,e." Thereupon, a long, alst-slil. 4
countoman, whose legs nem nome Inches longer than his
trousers, approached the heifer, and stooping down, c me-
maimed handing her testa. Bossy, not relishing such
imillarlty, lifted her h-tote and laid "Oren, sprawling
son. ten fat elf •• there," said 3m, it shove one of
her ,xst trattr ; shell never allow a strange c-.lf to come
hear her." Granny," memwhile picking himself up, and
gi v'rhz his busby pate a harrowinn scratch, exclaimed "No
wet, r when her Own calf has been Westing arouni bar all
[W."