The Dorset County Express and Agricultural Gazette.
Dorchester, Dorset, England, 1879-06-10 00:00:00

FACTS AND FANCIES.
Prom Paw&

Daum D*i rIM. II A.X /—**4lll., frogs midi 000
"Nun, toy maa,guu must luok sharp, or you'll see nothing
of ths no. r an. (Mmost ststionary): "Who ars you
a-talking to, Mr. Crutch nod Toothpick Row do you:
know bat ',tint I hates o-going to Mao Honker

- -
Somums° I.IILR • FIJULT MAW —We learn horn one of
our e.mte.uporanes tlue John Dunn has so fewer than
seventeen Zu.o wives. and "a correspauding number of
children." Whatever that Mat be in precise figures. It
Is clear that this gentleman must have added a large
inerunont to the already numerous family of the "Dunn
Browns."

"thscourreirriat."—Couneel for the prisoner : "And
YOU tell me, eir. you saw that blind. helpless fiddler kick
the ortmecutor on the head along with his other mean-
ante r—Witneea : '1 did, sun I In the thick o' the
abindy. I men the ould vacation. wfaelin' round an' round
that honest poor man down on the flower till he'd found a
vacancy. whin he ups add hi. fut an' lite fly the cavil's
own ahawfull clone into the centre ow% I I r

A 01111t/Init WILCoNL —Cry of *the Egysollen bond-
holder (oo hawing that the Khedive pays the May
coupon): "H.il.oUhfll Well met r
A Pncierric Etinnillllo —Dunce Ni. 1 pranslatin g a
fable or L. Youtoto.): "What di.. 'is OW sl no mute
you me..? les whet the Rouges gage to the CAdme, you
En,. r—Dence No. 1: "Oh, 1 guppoge it mgeos, 'I
Sem hal / reap *—Whas inemata g always telling Ns
two ought to do r

Diraralucut—First city man (Optimist) : " How's
wlth you I I can't itsip thinking things are
Imking beb—"—Seoond city man (pessimist): "Drifting
fas: to the Workhouse And what makes me doubly
auzinus is, I can't think who'll bs left to pay the Poo..
ram r

WILLIAM LLOYD GARRISON.
Boni hi /Lesaacheamta, December 11, UK
LIVID TO Fagg TM/ Sire& elm TO xi MIN 71113).
D.ed la New York. llay a 4.19

Trne heat' and fearlanr—FrosionieWs; --tlta—t. braved,
On Freedom's friends when aercest down thay bore—
tssevrall 1 Tb• etude' of Freedom saved,
What matter 11 Its 0•111S01(11 BO 11101.•

From Pim

"Ma Wm Dirtzvgas Erga."—Znily: "Although
you yroolsed to take me to ' The Oats, I dad you have
been without ma'—ebaries 'W.O my dear, I only
went to no whether you would like it some other rear."
A. Esousa "Femme, "rim George Mitchell
would seem to think that his a‘ricultural origin is some-
thing almost unque, seeing how persistently Im writes and
speaks of 1)1=1611 se "One from the Plousb." But be is
much mistaken. for in all the more distinguished paths of
life am to be found men who, if they did not route from
Um plough, hare at least been " Harrow " boys in their
youth.
Ak PARDO/Will DOUBT.—WiabK (to flabby-faced man):
" Which ere you air, bolted whoa Aduid or osabliat end orator
nue* r

A CUM FOR Toocuaces.—Boy: "What are you 017114
for, Seily l' "Co. 1 got the toothache.."—Hey
You go round to my grandmother, the 'ull show yer what
to ac; she know, how to take all hors out and put 'elm
back whrnevar eh* wants."

THE REAL MATCH OF THE DAY.
Poot I Never speak to am mein
Of Delimit' Webb, Matil.l• Jane I
I soy you mit to me in vain of bow be gamely dips ;
No soon. attempt to talk me down
Wlih tale. of Corkey or of Brown.
And ae to Wantou's wide renown, the facts / know Wipes
b
I laugh, oh I oh I to hear you say
That such and suck • one can enty—
Pooh, pooh ! loathe.; go away I It. liko your cool
assurance
/ toll you. earl, that. Uto might,
Itch man of Ikea; a puny wight
In view of facts that Fit recite ef wonderful endurance.

Not one, Matilda, of the batch
Of feet. you meat by is a " patch
Upon • certein walking match at present in contention;
I, this Ulan. you'll understand,
Sir Johnny Astley has no hand:
A sportily. general has plmin'd the fixture that I mention.
And them competing have to train
A goodish deal, Matilda Jane:
vemir work. I hardly need explain. exacting NCH " coo&
Son.-
The mach is oue between our bend
Of gallant troops in Zalulud—
Beneath the (litneral's oonamand—and UTTER iIIARTTION.
Their chief Ins honked them (so they say)
To march on Leif • crumb a day
Until the foe le cleared away or Britain's self anrrandere
The prise to bo—a nord of praise,
Neglect In their &chinos dlr.
And all the rest that no repays the pluck or our defenders.
Al pretest all the bettieg's done
Uta -4 in to our
It must be Moine exciting Inn to watch the match proceed.
ins I
Onr men—(it isn't pluck they need)—
Will gamely eptirt at Unne, and laid.
But, u • reel., I grieve to read that hummoses 'sadist I

1 MO Ms to minors& wide awake
The length of tam this match will take
Is not so lons—l Wink we oak. our osioulations dimly;
I fancy, balm as a guide
The length of Invasion's stride,
That soon the latter will decide the MOW rather grimly I
My" News," Matilda ; road me bow
This dreadful betting's going no—
And now, Matilda, don't allow them words to be
repeated
Though mostly, as I'm proud to my.
A lover of the fairest play,
I hope that IslAamOn may be "got at"—and defeated

(From the Ethel
The Liberal demonstration at Rawenstall on Katardlog
was enlivened by • number of politicai songs Hare is the
chorus of ono
Now, it, tramp, boys, tramp, and be contented,
If you can cads. enough to make • mitsi ;
For you'll surely hare to By to the workhoture by-and-bye
If you'll only keep the Tories to the wheel
The burden of another of the soma is, "The Tories are
up and the Wages are dooms' There is • grim energy
about the words which exhibits the rising spirit of
discontent among those who feel most bitterly the effects
of Tory rule—
There is BLIGHT:ma in store, there, (D.susgas to come,
When the Dismal arch-humbug is powerless and dumb;
John Bright we'll remember, Will Gladstone we'll crown,
When our wages are up and the Toriom are down.
From the BMA Ilona
NEW MISSIONARY HYMN.
From Chatham's p meant mountains,
Front Aldershot's bare plain,
Where the British flair gouts proudly;
And the lion shakes his mane,
From barracks and from ineseroom
Resound the bugle's notes.
Calling to arum, to cram the IMO
And tut some heathen throats.
What tho' from =gptt
We daily Christ
And bead before the Prince Si Pao*.
. .

And woreitigle name,
In vale In
We bow Wore thr throne
heatheat grazortwegi of lowa
That we mitt our OM.
WW Ulo' ofir souls are lighted
With wirdom from on
Shall we to men benighted ,
The Getting gun deny /
Procbdrn It, oh I proclaim it
To Afghan and Zul
Mr la the way we I.gstial"l
• And, leech them who who.
No*, gently blow, brooses,
tot the war nook. upward curl
Wbllá bathed lu blood and glory
litaVorth our Pooraios ,Zarl •
But p, oh weep for Ingtond,
Ant! w the handare,„
For is het
• ?tad tarnfahed Is Q......11nita

Ems otrquti J Ilna—CaUTlOn —.MON affestim
mot agreeable contectamte ate sad bp. mem alimusis .
ethers, Ito weVer, attempta are ones made at eisheillettent
we therefore deem it n to mutton the public that
Mey can only b• obtained Is bex., dd. and Is, ; labelled
JANICS HIM I Ga. Hanalopathle Chemists, a, Thread-
needle Street, and 170, Piccadilly, Leedom, ,
HOLLOWAY'S OINTMCIIT AND PlLL4.—With the changing
imam It is prudent for all to rectify any earnest &filleting
them; but at lo incumbent on the aged, suffering under
ulcerations and similar debilitatiog osuass, to here them
removed, or worse conesquences , will- follow. This
ointalieet Is their rrimildl; on its powers all may
oestidetatly rely it not simPly puts WAr sores out of
Mght, but extirpates Use source of mischief, extanats the
eorrodina 110= I,n4..tusaa4e, natant to au ay the
Warr wit 4 _ asailoY amniotic... that will abide/
through life. Under this treatment bad lep sees
become sound, scorbutic drins cog of their miss, sad
=dub= some mem to SYWAST. as* hoe be lbw
cliasaaad was unknown in lama man

THE BATH AND WEST OF ENGLAND
SOCIETY'S EXHIBITION.