The Stourbridge Observer, Cradley Heath, Halesowen & District Chronicle.
Stourbridge, West Midlands, England, 1876-06-10 00:00:00

- AMERICAN HUMOUR,

• They are ten widowers in the United States Senate.
When they pass the Treasury Building they heir musics.'
murmurs of "So noble looking ; ' "Such a boyish walk."
There is said to be a man in New York so thin that
the cau keep cool at any time by standing in the shade of a
lamp-post.

- -
A sweet potato recently discovered in Tennessee has
"an astonishing likeness to a young lady "—which is another
method of remarking, we suppose, that it looks good enough
to eat.

A Kentucky paper, in announcing a Sunday•school
picnic, "truly hopes that our citizens will, for once, leave
their bowie-knives and revolvers at home."

An Oregon paper refers to a new editor on a rival
journal as 'a young man of frugal mental capacity."
It is decided that woman cannot practice law in
Wisconsin: but thej udge who decided it crawled under the
barn last week and hasn't come out since.
The advantages of advertising are clearly proved in
the case of Cincinnati man, who advertised a few days ago
for a " harminicon," and was presented by his wife on the
following night with twins.
Some one calls "the race of American ladies indo-
lent," whereupon one of them retorts, "I wonder if that
man ever reflected upon the amount of shopping we do, and
the willingness with which we do it ? "
A Canadian editor announced that "he had a keen
rapier to prick all fools and knaves." His contemporary over
the way said.he hoped his friends would take it from him,
for he might commit suicide.
"Put down your umbrellas. You'll Fears this
engine oil the line l" screamed the engineer on the Western
North Carolina road to a crowd of country people who had
gathered to see the first train come in. They were all lowered
at once.
A Yankee journal offers this indUcement :—" All
subscribers paying in advance will be entitldd to a first-class
obituary notice in case of death."'
"I say, Sambo," said one virgin darkey to
I'4
another, "can you answer this conunderflum " s'posin' I
gib you a bottle of whisky corked-shut with' a cork, how
would you get de whisky out without pulliie de cork or
breakin' de bottle ?"—" I gibs dat up."—"Why, push de cork
"How is your establishment run?" asked a Wes-
tern editor of an Eastern brother, at whose presses he was
looking.—" By water-power.' "How Is yours rim ?"—" By
the same po wee," replied., the man from the setting sun,
"but we take it pretty mann our whiskey,"
They were sitting together, he and *she, and he was
arduously thinking what to say. 'Finally he 'hUrst out with:
"In this land of noble achievements and undyirg glory,
why is it that women do not come more to the front : why is
it that they do not climb the ladder of fame ?I' [suppose,"
said she, putting her finger in her mouth, "it. is all on
account of their support.'
A young lady and gentleman, taking a romantic'
stroll together in New York the other evening, walkad into
a well in South Water-street, which some one had care-
lessly left uncovered. Their emotiod were too deep for
utterance. _

"What on Birth is that?" exclaimed a Yankee
countryman on board a steamboat, coming ilevn the East
River, and pointing, as he spoke, tl the mouth- of s huge
sewer on the New York side. "rhat," demurely said.another
passenger, "Is one of those mammoth monster gnus Ok read
about in the newspapers." "What's it doing there?" Asked
the greenhorn. "Oh," replied the other, "it's there for the
harbour defence, that we also read about in the nowepapers.'i