history: I let out a rip roaring fart in the office today. Never felt so mortified in my life. I let out a rip roaring fart in the office today. The kind that makes small birds die. That's fantastic! Was anyone around to witness the glory?
current: Oh, there were plenty. I don't think I'll ever live it down. A few people were sent to the ER!
next: You deserve a purple heart for the bravery you showed today.