transcription: BOSS (COMPANY OWNER) CALLED ALL OF US AT WORK ON A CONFERENCE CALL WE NEW IT WAS GONNA BE BAD, BUT THIS..... NO ONE WILL BE FIRED, ALL OF US GET FULL PAY, HOME OFFICE POSSIBLE FOR ALL OF US, SOCIAL DISTANCING AT WORK SPACE GUARANTEED, BONUS PAYOUTS END OF MAY, OUR COMPANY CAN RUN 2 YEARS WITH NO INCOME HIS MONEY MANAGEMENT IS AMAZING! WTF. imgflip.com