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+{"text":" \nATAC BRIEFING FOR AGENTS FRANK AND JOE HARDY\n\nMISSION: To finally get to the bottom of the ongoing deadly scares taking place on the set of the reality TV show Deprivation House.\n\nLOCATION: A huge villa in Beverly Hills, CA, without a single luxury left inside.\n\nPOTENTIAL VICTIMS: Every contestant on the reality show is in extreme danger.\n\nSUSPECTS: It's possible one of the new contestants has a devious agenda, or else someone who's been there all along is hiding a huge secret.\n\nThis mission requires your immediate attention. This message will be erased in five seconds.\n\nWatch out for our next case, Book One of the new Double Danger Trilogy: Double Trouble\n\n  ALADDIN PAPERBACKS  \nSimon & Schuster, New York  \nCover designed by Sammy Yuen Jr.  \nCharacter photograph copyright \u00a9 2008  \nby Michael Frost; background photograph  \ncopyright \u00a9 2008 by PictureQuest  \nAges 8\u201312  \nSimonSaysKids.com  \n0908\nIs their cover blown?\n\nShe can't know, I told myself. ATAC security is way too good. She can't have gotten past it.\n\nI completely believed that. In my head. In my stomach, I wasn't quite as sure.\n\nVeronica raised her eyebrows. \"Interesting choice,\" she told Georgina. \"And something of a bargain, because Frank's secret gives away something about Joe as well.\"\n\nMy palms began to sweat. A secret that was about me and Joe? How many things could that be?\n\nStrategy. I needed strategy. What should Joe and I do if we were outed right here and now?\n\nDeny it? Say it was some ratings stunt of Veronica's? Or something she and the other producers had come up with to create tension in the house? I don't watch a lot\u2014or actually any\u2014reality TV, but Joe says they all end up having lots of fights among the contestants. That was definitely turning out to be true on our show.\n\nOr should we admit to the truth and warn everybody that they were in danger? Just explain that Joe and I had been placed undercover as contestants because the death threats they'd received were being taken very seriously\u2014and for good reason, since several people in this house had already been victims of murder!\n\n#1 Extreme Danger\n\n#2 Running on Fumes\n\n#3 Boardwalk Bust\n\n#4 Thrill Ride\n\n#5 Rocky Road\n\n#6 Burned\n\n#7 Operation: Survival\n\n#8 Top Ten Ways to Die\n\n#9 Martial Law\n\n#10 Blown Away\n\n#11 Hurricane Joe\n\n#12 Trouble in Paradise\n\n#13 The Mummy's Curse\n\n#14 Hazed\n\n#15 Death and Diamonds\n\n#16 Bayport Buccaneers\n\n#17 Murder at the Mall\n\n#18 Pushed\n\n#19 Foul Play\n\n#20 Feeding Frenzy\n\n#21 Comic Con Artist\n\nSuper Mystery #1: Wanted\n\nSuper Mystery #2: Kidnapped at the Casino\n\n#22 Deprivation House\n\n#23 House Arrest\n\n#24 Murder House\n\nSpecial Ghost Stories\n\nEdition: Haunted\n\n**Available from Simon & Schuster**\n\nThis book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real locales are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author's imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.\n\nALADDIN PAPERBACKS\n\nAn imprint of Simon & Schuster Children's Publishing Division\n\n1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020  \nwww.SimonandSchuster.com\n\nCopyright \u00a9 2008 by Simon & Schuster, Inc.\n\nAll rights reserved, including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form.\n\nALADDIN PAPERBACKS, THE HARDY BOYS MYSTERY STORIES, HARDY BOYS UNDERCOVER BROTHERS,  \nand related logo are  \nregistered trademarks of Simon & Schuster, Inc.\n\nDesigned by Sammy Yuen Jr.\n\nThe text of this book was set in Aldine 401 BT.\n\nFirst Aladdin Paperbacks edition September 2008\n\n10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1\n\neISBN-13: 978-1-4424-5347-0\n\nLibrary of Congress Control Number 2008920166\n\nISBN-13: 978-1-4169-6409-4\n\nISBN-10: 1-4169-6409-6\n\nChapter 1: Sabotage\n\nChapter 2: Everybody Has Secrets\n\nChapter 3: Accusations\n\nChapter 4: Worried?\n\nChapter 5: Deeply Disturbed\n\nChapter 6: Silent Girl Screams\n\nChapter 7: Ripped Apart\n\nChapter 8: Psycho Teammate\n\nChapter 9: Another One Down\n\nChapter 10: Targeted\n\nChapter 11: Twisted Twins\n\nChapter 12: So Much Blood\n\nChapter 13: Killer Pool\n\nChapter 14: Why Would She Do That?\n\nChapter 15: The Knife\n\nChapter 16: Game Over\n\n## Sabotage\n\nI figured the wheels of my Suzuki RM-Z450 had to be smoking as I wove through the orchard. But I didn't let up on the throttle. I had the lead, and I didn't want to lose it.\n\nI broke out of the trees and into the field behind the tennis courts. Mounds of dirt were heaped up all across it. I could maneuver the bike around them. But I'd lose time.\n\nThe three mounds almost dead ahead weren't so much different from the triple jump at Highland Park. I'd taken that one lots of times.\n\nOkay, this hill was a little higher, I decided as I started up it. I heard at least one bike coming up behind me. Fast. I moved into attack position. Standing on the dirt bike's pegs. Knees tightened around the tank. My elbows up and out.\n\nYeah, this hill was definitely higher than the first of the triple back home. I kept an even throttle as I approached the top. Here it came. I was about to go airborne.\n\nStay low over the jump, I reminded myself. It would buy me a few extra seconds. Not much. But a few seconds could be the difference between winning and losing. I was undercover as a reality show contestant, and that meant I should want to win more than anything. Somebody on the show wanted to win so badly he or she had sent death threats to all of the contestants.\n\nAs my bike came off the top of the hill, I pushed down on the right footpeg and pulled up on the left side of the handlebars. The bike laid out flat. Nice. The move had stopped the upward motion of the jump. That's where I picked up the extra seconds.\n\nI got on the throttle right before I hit ground to help the rear suspension take the impact of landing. Solid. Now I had to\u2014\n\nMy strategy was worthless. A rider came over the hill behind me kamikaze style, lost control of their ride, and slammed into my back wheel.\n\nWe both went down. And another bike was just going airborne. There was no time to do anything but curl my body into a protective ball. I felt the bike's heat on the top of my head as it cleared me. Next time I might not be so lucky.\n\nI scrambled to my feet and saw that it was Georgina who'd taken me out. \"Come on, we've got to get out of the way before someone else takes the jump!\"\n\nI grabbed my bike by the handlebars, got it up, then ran it down the side of the hill, out of the path of the most direct route to the grocery shelves at the end of the field. That's what this race was. A contest to see who could get the groceries on their list back to the mansion first.\n\n\"Are you okay?\" I asked Georgina.\n\nShe pulled off her helmet. \"Yeah. But the bike's messed up,\" she answered.\n\n\"I don't know if mine got damaged or not,\" I said.\n\n\"No, I mean mine was messed up before. The brakes stopped working,\" Georgina told me. She slapped the seat of her bright purple Kawasaki.\n\nThe dirt bikes we were using for the race were brand-new. That could mean only one thing.\n\nSabotage.\n\n## Everybody Has Secrets\n\n\"Everyone, everyone! Please gather round,\" Veronica called from her spot on the patio near the large fountain. She backed up a step as we headed toward her. I'm sure she was afraid we'd contaminate her. We were all sweaty and dirt smeared and grass stained.\n\nVeronica was perfumed and nail painted and color coordinated in her pale blue suit and pale blue spike heels. She should have looked like TV Host Barbie in all that perfect, with her white-blond hair smoothed back into one of those knot things that aren't buns but that I don't have the words to actually describe, having only one X chromosome.\n\nBut the smile she gave the group was pure, lipstick-coated nastiness. You'd never see Barbie looking so eeevil. And enjoying it so much.\n\n\"First, I want to announce the winner of this competition.\" She paused. Of course. When Deprivation House actually aired, there would probably be a commercial break right here. \"Brynn Fulgham got her groceries home before the rest of you. That means she will be deciding the next deprivation.\"\n\n\"Don't take away toiletries!\" Ripley called. Ripley Lansing was the group's celebrity, although she was only famous for having famous\u2014and rich\u2014parents. \"The boys smell bad enough now that they hardly ever shower. We won't survive if they lose deodorant privileges!\"\n\n\"Who can shower when there's no hot water anymore?\" Gail protested. Gail's parents definitely weren't rich. So not rich they didn't always have enough money to pay the heating bill. Sometimes Gail had to go to bed in her coat to stay warm.\n\n\"All the girls still shower,\" Ripley shot back.\n\n\"I don't care about deodorant or shampoo or any of that. I just want to be able to keep my drawing supplies,\" Hal said. Hal was always drawing plans for the planet around which he planned to design a computer game.\n\nI tried to figure out what Joe Carr would want most. That was my cover. A rich boy from Connecticut, adopted by a different family from my brother, Frank Dooley. It was hard to come up with anything. We'd already lost cell phones, iPods, junk food.\n\n\"Brynn, I'm begging you. Think of the odor,\" Ripley pleaded.\n\n\"Now, now. It's Brynn's decision,\" Veronica reminded everyone. \"And she doesn't need to make it until tomorrow night. Right now, I want to take some time for us all to get to know one another a little better.\"\n\n\"I know these losers as well as I want to,\" James Sittenfeld told her. \"I've been trapped in the house with them for almost a month.\"\n\nWe had been spending almost all our time together since our first day as contestants on Deprivation House, a reality show where teenagers saw how long they could last without luxury items. The network probably thought it would be fun for old folks to laugh at the younger generation freaking out because they were unable to go online, watch TV, text message, and talk on the cell at the same time.\n\nStill, I wouldn't mind learning some more about the other kids in the house. They were all suspects. See, my brother and I weren't really contestants. That was just our cover. We were actually here on an assignment for American Teens Against Crime, an organization our dad helped found. ATAC puts teens undercover in places where adult operatives would stick out too much. Like on a reality show where all the contestants are kids. Get me?\n\nFrank and I ended up here because all the contestants had received death threats. And since we'd shown up, a lot of nasty things had been happening. Some people had even died. None of them contestants. At least not yet.\n\nSo that's why I was up for finding out as much as possible about every kid in the house. Although I've got to say, if James wasn't a suspect and was just some guy, I'd be happy to never learn another thing about him. Like last night, I found out he clips his toenails\u2014with his teeth. I already knew he was maniacally competitive, and a bully. But I'm not biased or anything. Detectives have to keep open minds. And I'm a detective. Just because James is your basic rat dropping in human form doesn't mean he's a killer.\n\n\"George and Georgina only joined us very recently, and I thought some of you might be curious as to why they were allowed to join our game so late,\" Veronica continued.\n\n\"To get ratings,\" Olivia muttered.\n\nVeronica pretended not to hear her. \"The truth is, I got a letter from their father asking me to consider allowing them to come to Deprivation House. It was so touching that the network and I just couldn't say no.\" She gave a sweet smile. And when she smiles like that, somebody's about to get sucker punched.\n\n\"Let me read it to you,\" Veronica went on. I did a face check on George and Georgina. Not happy. And not happy. I miscalculated. Make that two somebodys were going to get a Veronica smackdown. She began:\n\n\"Dear Ms. Wilmont, I saw a commercial for your upcoming show, Deprivation House, and I had to write to you. You and your house may be the last hope for my fifteen-year-old twins, George and Georgina. All their lives, their mother and I have given them everything they've asked for. As an example, for their last birthday, they received a trip to Maui with eight of their friends, Georgina received a Tennessee walking horse, and George an Escalade, in addition to thousands of dollars' worth of smaller presents.\n\n\"It would have been our pleasure to give our children these gifts. We want them to enjoy all life has to offer. But they don't seem to understand that not everyone has the privileges they do. They have no concept of the work that has gone into earning the money to pay for their lifestyle. They show no appreciation. They show almost no awareness that a horse or a car are any different from the air or the ground, something that is simply there at any time for their use.\n\n\"That's why I'm begging you to make them a part of your show. Not so they have a chance to win a million dollars. That would only make the situation more nauseating. All I want is for George and Georgina to have the opportunity to live without what they consider necessities, but what the majority of the population considers luxuries. For a brief time, I want them to be deprived. I know that this is not your responsibility. It is their mother's and mine. But we have not been able to take control of the situation, and that is why we are asking for your help. No, begging.\n\n\"I know the deadline to enter the contest has passed, but please don't refuse us. Please give George and Georgina a chance to become better people.\n\nSincerely,  \nGeorge Taggart\"\n\nVeronica carefully refolded the letter. \"Of course, I couldn't say no.\"\n\nI did another George and Georgina face check. Very not happy. And very not happy. In fact, make that George red-faced, looking like he was about to go nuclear. And Georgina, face drained of color, looking like she was plotting somebody's long and painful death.\n\n\"If their parents don't want them to have the money, does that mean they're ineligible to win it?\" Olivia asked.\n\nI wasn't surprised that she was the first to get that question out. Olivia is the queen of strategy in the game.\n\n\"That would be completely uncool,\" George burst out. \"If we're here, and we have to follow all the same rules as everybody here, we should have the same chance to win the cash as anybody else.\"\n\n\"George and Georgina will follow the same rules and have the same privileges as the rest of you,\" Veronica answered. \"Including the chance to win the prize money.\"\n\n\"What would you even do with the cash?\" Gail protested. \"It sounds like you have two of everything that exists already.\" Gail was a latecomer to the House too, just not as late as the twins. She joined the group about a week and a half into the game as a surprise twist.\n\n\"Ever heard of legal emancipation?\" Georgina asked. Some of the color had returned to her cheeks, and her eyes were bright with excitement. \"That's what I would do with the money. Hire myself a lawyer. Cut all ties with my parents. As you might have guessed, they're complete control freaks, emphasis on the freaks. And use the rest of the cash to live on.\"\n\n\"My plan exactly,\" said George.\n\n\"Not until you just heard me say it,\" Georgina snapped. \"You never have any ideas of your own.\"\n\n\"It doesn't matter, because only one of us is winning the moola, and it's going to be me,\" George told his sister. \"Don't think I'm sharing, either. I'll be living solo, and you'll be home with the freaks.\"\n\n\"You've never won anything without my help and you know it,\" Georgina shot back. \"The only reason I didn't win today is that my bike was messed with. You couldn't\u2014\"\n\n\"Hey, don't fight,\" James cut in. He gave a smile every bit as nasty as Veronica's, but minus the lipstick. \"It's pointless. Neither of you is going to win. 'Cause I'm winning. Everybody else here has already accepted it. You'll just have to suck it up too.\"\n\n\"Did you forget that Brynn won today's competition?\" Olivia demanded.\n\n\"Competitions aren't everything,\" James reminded her. \"It's all about how you handle the deprivation. And I'm stone. Nothing gets to me.\"\n\n\"You practically meowed when your exercise equipment got\u2014\" Olivia began.\n\nVeronica clapped her hands. \"Enough of this bickering. It's very entertaining, but I think we've got plenty of footage. Now, I imagine it must have been somewhat humiliating for George and Georgina to have had that letter read aloud to all of you\u2014and of course to all the viewers when our show airs. So I think it's only fair that a few other secrets are revealed today. George, why don't you pick one of the other contestants, and I'll reveal a secret about them.\"\n\n\"Why does he get to pick?\" Georgina whined.\n\nVeronica ignored her. Veronica is very good at ignoring anything that displeases her.\n\n\"What secrets are you even talking about, anyway?\" demanded James.\n\nVeronica ignored him, too.\n\nI shot a fast glance at Frank. His face was carefully blank. But I knew we both had the same question James did. What secrets did Veronica know? She couldn't know the real reason Frank and I were here. Could she?\n\nIf she outed us, our mission was over. We wouldn't be able to protect anyone in the house if our cover was blown.\n\nGeorge glanced around the group, taking his time, enjoying making the rest of us sweat. What a guy. \"I pick . . .\" He did a dramatic pause. He'd learned something from Veronica. \"Ripley.\"\n\nOlivia snorted. \"Don't we know all her secrets already?\" she asked. \"She's in the paper practically every day. Even though all she's famous for is going to parties and spending her parents' money.\"\n\nOlivia really had a thing against rich people. It wasn't Ripley's fault that her dad was the drummer for Tubskull and her mom ran a cosmetics company and that they had a zillion dollars. I guess it was her fault that she'd been pretty obnoxious before she came to the house\u2014stomping on paparazzi cameras, getting waiters fired for pretty much nothing, and other brat stuff like that. But she'd been cool since we'd met her.\n\n\"She saved my life,\" I reminded Olivia. \"And Bobby T's.\" Bobby T was a contestant who had already been booted from the show.\n\n\"She saved your life and Bobby's so she wouldn't get her platinum American Express cut up by her parents,\" Olivia corrected me. \"We all know that Ripley's mom and dad got sick of all the bad publicity she was getting, and that they told her she had to start proving she could be nice\u2014and getting the good PR to prove it\u2014or they wouldn't give her any more money. She'd have to wait until she was thirty, when she got her inheritance, before she saw another dollar.\"\n\n\"What if they did?\" Ripley asked. The muscles in her neck tensed, but she forced a smile. I have to say, she was working pretty hard at the nice. \"Is it so wrong for them to want me to be a better person? Isn't that what your parents are supposed to do?\" She looked from George to Georgina. \"It's what your dad was trying to do by getting you on the show, right?\"\n\n\"Yeah, what a great guy,\" George answered with a sneer. \"I really respect him.\"\n\n\"We're getting off the subject of Ripley's secret,\" said Veronica.\n\n\"Is the secret that Ripley is the one who put Joe and Bobby T in danger in the first place?\" Olivia jumped in. \"Because I think it's way too convenient that she was right on the spot when two people needed rescuing.\"\n\n\"Frank was the one who took a chainsaw to the sauna when people got trapped in there,\" Ripley protested. \"Why aren't you accusing him of setting things up to look like a hero?\"\n\n\"It was Mitch who rigged the sauna. It was Mitch who put peanut oil in Bobby T's toothpaste to give him the allergic reaction. He's the one who fed jimsonweed to the dog who attacked Joe too,\" I reminded everyone. Mitch was a bank robber who'd hidden cash in the house before he'd gone to prison. He was trying to get us all out of there so he could collect it.\n\n\"Do you really know that for sure?\" asked Olivia. \"Stuff kept happening.\"\n\n\"Mary is the one who was sabotaging us. You know that,\" Joe said. Mary was a former fellow contestant who'd confessed to most of the sabotage before the police took her away.\n\n\"She said she didn't put the glass shards in the ice,\" Olivia continued. \"And she also denied setting that fire in Bobby's room, and putting the knives in Brynn's makeup bag. Why wouldn't she admit to those when she admitted to everything else? And there was that writing in the\u2014\"\n\n\"And somebody messed with my dirt bike,\" Georgina interrupted. \"I was completely sabotaged.\"\n\n\"Yeah, right,\" said George. \"She always has an excuse when she loses,\" he explained.\n\n\"I only lose when\u2014\" Georgina began.\n\n\"Enough!\" Veronica ordered. \"I can see that having to go without your usual luxuries is making some of you distrustful and unusually angry. That's something the other judges and I will have to look at when we review the tapes to decide who must leave this week.\"\n\nOlivia's mouth dropped open. Then she snapped it shut.\n\n\"All right, this is the secret about Ripley.\" Veronica's tongue flicked across her lower lip. \"It's something Ripley herself doesn't even know, since she has been deprived of TV and the Internet along with the rest of you.\" Veronica did another one of her pauses, then she turned toward Ripley. \"I'm sorry to tell you this, but your mother entered a rehab clinic in Malibu yesterday morning.\"\n\n\"Ooooh,\" James called out. Like we were in school and someone had just gotten called to the principal's office. Dillweed.\n\nRipley's face paled, but she just gave a short nod.\n\n\"You should really see this as a positive thing,\" said Veronica. She reached out and touched Ripley's arm. \"I just hope your mother won't try to leave too soon. You know what happened in this house.\" She gave a delicate shudder. \"I'm sure it could have been prevented if Katrina Decter had only stayed in rehab long enough to make a complete recovery.\"\n\n\"What is she talking about?\" Georgina asked Brynn.\n\nBrynn didn't seem to hear her. It didn't matter. Veronica was more than happy to answer. What had happened in this house ten years ago made good television.\n\n\"Katrina Decter was an actress on her way to superstardom when her husband killed her. Right in the great room upstairs,\" Veronica explained. \"She was just out of rehab herself, and she had had a relapse. She actually attacked her little daughter, Nina, who was only four. Her husband killed her to save Nina's life.\"\n\n\"I don't think I have to worry about my mom trying to off me, if that's what you're saying,\" Ripley said sharply.\n\nVeronica better back off, I thought. She was about to face off with Bad Ripley. And I had a feeling that if you put Veronica and Bad Rip into the cage together, Ripley might just walk out with Veronica's head in her hand.\n\n\"Aren't you sensitive,\" Veronica cooed. \"That must be one of your deep fears coming out. It wasn't my implication at all.\"\n\nUh, yeah it was. It so was.\n\n\"Whatever,\" muttered Ripley.\n\n\"Let's move on. Georgina, now it's your turn to choose a contestant, and we'll hear one more secret,\" Veronica said. Her eyes flicked around the group. \"I see some nervous faces,\" she commented. \"It makes me wonder if I know what each of you is hiding.\"\n\nVeronica strolled among us. \"Who will it be, hmmm?\" She tapped Brynn on the shoulder, and Brynn flinched. \"Twitchy. I bet she's got something good.\"\n\nShe moved on and stopped next to me. I used my ATAC training to keep my body relaxed and a pleasant expression on my face. \"And what about this all-American teen? He looks like his big secret is getting away with breaking curfew. But I know better.\"\n\nI didn't allow myself to look at Frank. She's just trying to build up the intrigue, I told myself. It's her job to make a good show. Make sure nobody gets busy with the remote during Deprivation House.\n\n\"It's true. I'm really a girl,\" I joked. Lame, I know. But it was all I could come up with in the moment.\n\nVeronica continued to walk from person to person. It was like some demented game of duck, duck, goose. \"So, who will it be, Georgina?\" she finally asked.\n\nGeorgina didn't hesitate. \"Frank.\"\n\n## Accusations\n\nShe can't know, I told myself. ATAC security is way too good. She can't have gotten past it. I completely believed that. In my head. In my stomach, I wasn't quite as sure.\n\nVeronica raised her eyebrows. \"Interesting choice,\" she told Georgina. \"And something of a bargain, because Frank's secret gives away something about Joe as well.\"\n\nMy palms began to sweat. A secret that was about me and Joe? How many things could that be?\n\nStrategy. I needed strategy. What should Joe and I do if we were outed right here and now?\n\nDeny it? Say it was some ratings stunt of Veronica's? Or something she and the other producers had come up with to create tension in the house? I don't watch a lot\u2014or actually any\u2014reality TV, but Joe says they all end up having lots of fights among the contestants. That was definitely turning out to be true on our show.\n\nOr should we admit to the truth and warn everybody that they were in danger? Just explain that Joe and I had been placed undercover as contestants because the death threats they'd received were being taken very seriously\u2014and for good reason, since two people in this house had already been victims of murder!\n\nVeronica smiled at me. \"Here's a secret about Frank and Joe,\" she said, breaking her long pause. \"Joe's father makes twenty-eight times the salary Frank's does.\" She pretended to do the math on her fingers, her red nails flashing. \"Let's just say there are quite a few dollars' difference.\"\n\nRelief washed through me. I struggled to prevent it from showing on my face. Frank Dooley wouldn't be relieved to hear Veronica blabbing about how little money his family had in front of everybody. He'd be outraged. But he'd also probably be trying not to show that Veronica had gotten to him.\n\nI jammed my hands in my pockets and locked eyes with Veronica. \"It's not exactly a secret that his family is richer than mine.\" I jerked my chin toward Joe.\n\n\"True,\" Veronica answered. \"But did either of you know there was that much of a difference? Every single year?\"\n\nI glanced over at Joe. He smirked at me and fingered the Diesel sunglasses he had stuck in his shirt pocket. He was enjoying himself a little too much. He'd better know he wasn't keeping those sunglasses after the mission was over. There would be no way to explain to Mom and Aunt Trudy how he'd gotten them.\n\n\"Dude!\" James gave my brother a congratulatory smack on the back. \"Guess it won't hurt you too bad when I win,\" he added.\n\n\"Joe drives a Corvette. Frank gets to borrow the family Toyota Corolla. When it's not in use. Or in need of repair,\" Veronica continued. \"Last year Joe went on three vacations\u2014Switzerland, the south of France, and Florida. Frank and his family went to visit his aunt Sharon in Boise, Idaho. For those of you who don't know it, and I imagine that's most of you, Boise's biggest attraction is, I believe, an extremely large potato.\"\n\n\"I think seeing a Super Spud sounds cool,\" said Olivia. I wasn't surprised that Olivia jumped in to take my side. Basically, Olivia thinks that if you're rich, you're a spoiled snob, and that if you're poor, you're a basically decent person. It was that black and white with her.\n\nVeronica clapped her hands. \"I'm off. The secrets should give you all something to talk about. Gossip is about the only type of entertainment you lambs have left, am I right?\"\n\nShe didn't wait for an answer, just turned and strode back into the mansion.\n\n\"What a complete witch,\" Gail said, staring after her.\n\n\"Cameras,\" Hal reminded her.\n\n\"Right. They can't film twenty-four\/seven because of the union rules about minors working on TV shows, but you know they had to have been filming when Veronica laid out all those secrets. And I'm sure they still are. They'd want our reactions.\"\n\nJoe snorted. \"I don't think you really have to worry about it, Gail. Veronica would probably consider being called a witch a compliment.\"\n\n\"At least you two didn't give her what she wanted,\" Gail told me and Joe. \"You didn't start throwing punches.\"\n\n\"I don't have anything to be mad about,\" Joe commented, shrugging. \"Am I supposed to be upset that my family has a lot more money than his?\"\n\n\"He's your brother,\" Olivia snapped.\n\n\"We just met each other,\" Joe shot back. \"I know him as well as I know you.\" He raked his hands through his hair. \"It's not like I took something from him.\"\n\n\"The situation is what it is,\" I said. \"I'm fine with the family I have.\"\n\n\"What about you, Ripley? Are you okay?\" asked Brynn. \"It must have been so hard hearing that about your mom, especially because we don't have our cells anymore. You can't even e-mail anyone to see if she's okay.\"\n\n\"You could drop out,\" James reminded her. \"There are still cash rewards left for the next two people who do. You could scoop up the thirty thou dropout bonus, go see your mom. You've already done what you came here to do, right? Proved how nice you are.\"\n\n\"You just think you know why I'm here,\" Ripley said.\n\nHuh. Interesting.\n\n\"And anyway, my mom will want her privacy,\" Ripley continued. \"She won't want to see me until she's through the program.\"\n\n\"Sounds like you're familiar with the drill,\" Olivia observed. \"I don't get how people with everything even get substance abuse problems. They have everything. If I had half of what your mom has, I'd be the happiest person on the planet.\"\n\nDid she even hear herself? Her prejudice against rich people made Olivia as much of a witch as Veronica sometimes.\n\n\"Tell that to the little girl whose mother tried to kill her,\" Brynn muttered. \"Both of her parents were pretty rich. Famous actor. Famous director. Living in this fancy house.\"\n\n\"You know what?\" said Gail. \"I'm starting to think this place really has been cursed since that director killed his wife here. Think about it: We had another accident during the competition today. Georgina's crash could have been a lot worse.\"\n\n\"The curse is something Veronica and the producers want us to believe in,\" Joe said. \"They're trying to make the show more dramatic. Like that message we found in the Deprivation Chamber. A curse doesn't write 'Death House' on a wall. A person does that. Or am I wrong?\"\n\n\"Did you forget the part about the demon?\" asked Hal. \"Nina's mother was supposed to have been possessed by a demon when she attacked Nina. That's why Nina's father had to kill her mother. A demonic spirit could write on a wall.\"\n\n\"I thought you were more into the science part of science fiction,\" I told him. Usually the only thing he talked about\u2014or seemed to think about\u2014was creating the specifications for L-62, the planet he was going to base a computer game on. He wanted to win the million-dollar Deprivation House prize to get the start-up money he needed for the game.\n\n\"There is scientific evidence that spirits exist. The energy they produce can be measured,\" Hal answered.\n\nBrynn turned around and headed inside. \"Where are you going, Brynn?\" Ripley called after her.\n\n\"We've had this conversation a million times already,\" Brynn answered without stopping. I wanted to follow her. I pretty much wanted to be with Brynn every minute I could. I wouldn't be able to see her after the mission was over and I was back to being Frank Hardy.\n\nBut I couldn't leave now. I was afraid I'd miss something key. Our suspects were all gathered in one place.\n\n\"She was just out of rehab,\" Georgina reminded the group. \"Duh. That's the only demon in the story. Her mom started using drugs again and went out of her head and attacked Nina. There's no demon and no curse.\"\n\n\"You don't know the number of bad things that have happened here,\" said Gail. \"Two people died before you got here.\" She was referring to two of the production assistants. Leo had been killed by Mitch, and Sylvia had died of an aneurysm after Mary hit her over the head with a piece of wood.\n\n\"We know that Mitch and Mary were the ones behind everything that happened,\" Hal told her.\n\n\"'House of Death' was written in the Deprivation Chamber after Mary was taken away,\" Olivia pointed out.\n\n\"That's not the same as trying to kill people,\" I replied. \"It's just a stupid prank.\" I wasn't at all sure that was true, but I wanted to chill everyone out.\n\n\"Disabling my brakes wasn't a stupid prank,\" Georgina said.\n\nSilent Girl's eyes widened. Her name was Ann, but we called her Silent Girl because she hardly ever talked. It was part of her strategy. She didn't want to give away anything about herself, in case it could be used against her somehow.\n\n\"If I find out who it is, they are going to be in a world of pain,\" James threatened.\n\n\"You're the most likely candidate,\" Joe told him. \"You're always bragging about how great you are and how you're going to trample the rest of us. But how many competitions have you won? And how loud did you whine when exercise equipment got taken away?\"\n\n\"Yeah, you have to be running scared,\" said George. \"I can see you giving yourself a little help.\"\n\n\"You don't know anything!\" James yelled. \"You just got here. You're never going to last. The rest of us have had things taken away little by little. You and your sister have to deal with tons of things being gone from day one. No hot food. No Internet. No TV. No hot water. No books or magazines. You're never going to make it. Just drop out now. Take the consolation money and go.\"\n\n\"It would give you fewer people to sabotage,\" George shot back.\n\n\"If the reason you think I'm sabotaging people is because I want to win, then everybody should be a suspect,\" James growled. \"You all want to win as bad as I do. You just aren't as honest about it.\" He strode into the mansion.\n\n\"Touchy,\" Olivia muttered.\n\n\"He's right, though,\" said Ripley. \"If someone is still sabotaging us now that Mary's gone, it could be any of us. And I'm voting for you.\"\n\n\"Me? Why me?\" Olivia protested.\n\n\"You've made it very clear you don't think any rich kids should be allowed to compete for the money,\" Ripley answered. \"Why not try to knock Georgina out of the competition? She doesn't deserve to win\u2014that's what you think, isn't it?\"\n\nOlivia blinked rapidly. She opened her mouth, but she couldn't find words quickly enough.\n\n\"Don't bother. We all know it is. You've pretty much said so every day since you got here,\" Ripley continued. She turned to Gail. \"And I know how much you need money. I almost wouldn't blame you if you were willing to cheat\u2014I mean murder\u2014to get it.\"\n\n\"I would never hurt anyone to win,\" Gail said, her voice low and hard. \"Never.\"\n\nRipley shrugged. \"I'm just saying, I can see it.\"\n\n\"Let's get out of here.\" Olivia grabbed Gail's arm, and they hurried inside.\n\n\"If I were you, I wouldn't be as okay as you act like you are. About my family having so much more money,\" Joe said to me. \"I'd be overheated. I might be willing to, uh, bend the rules to get some cash.\" Nice work on our cover.\n\n\"I'm not you,\" I told him.\n\nThere was a long silence. Even though we were outside, it felt like all the air had been sucked out from where we were standing.\n\n\"So, great,\" George finally said. \"What you're all telling me is that my sister and I are probably sharing a house with a killer.\"\n\n## Worried?\n\n\"I guess that is what we're saying,\" I told George. \"We're probably living in a house with a killer. Zoinks, as Shaggy would say.\"\n\nMy joke got a few half laughs. More than it deserved. Because it wasn't that funny. And because the living-with-a-killer thing was truly scary.\n\nRipley let out a sigh. \"So what should we all do for fun? That doesn't involve bleeding or poisoning or snakes or anything like that.\"\n\n\"Well, if you take away all that stuff . . . ,\" Hal said.\n\n\"That leaves us with practically nothing,\" said George.\n\n\"Charades?\" Ann the Silent Girl offered.\n\nThat got real laughs from everybody. \"Of course you want to play charades. You never speak. You'll probably kill at it. Uh, I mean, you'll probably beat us all,\" Ripley quickly corrected herself.\n\n\"I want to change these pants first,\" Georgina said. \"I got a grass stain on them, and I have to try to get it out. They're my friend Carly's.\"\n\n\"All you girls better watch yourselves,\" George warned. \"Georgina is always borrowing her friends' clothes, then wrecking them.\"\n\n\"No, I'm not. Don't listen to him. We share some DNA, that's all. He doesn't know anything about me,\" Georgina told us, rubbing at the grass stain on the knee of her purple jeans.\n\n\"Meet up in the great room?\" I asked.\n\n\"Where else?\" answered Hal.\n\nAs I led the way inside, I caught Frank checking the balcony that overlooked the fountain. Pretty much Brynn's favorite hangout.\n\nI let the others go ahead of me, and dropped into step next to Frank, who was bringing up the rear. I couldn't talk to him for too long. It would look suspicious, especially after Veronica pretty much invited us to hate each other. But I figured we could grab a second. \"Do you know where the Band-Aids are in the supply closet?\"\n\n\"I guess I can show you,\" Frank muttered. \"You're probably so used to having people wait on you that you're helpless.\"\n\n\"You know you want to go after her,\" I said once we were inside the walk-in closet. It was one of the few places we knew for sure there were no cameras. There and the bathrooms.\n\n\"Who?\" he asked.\n\n\"Did you just say who?\" I shook my head.\n\n\"Okay, I know who,\" Frank admitted.\n\nHere's the deal. I started crushing on Brynn from the first day we showed up at Deprivation House. And for once, a girl realized that I am truly the superior Hardy brother in looks, charm, and all other departments that matter. You got it: Brynn seemed pretty happy to hang with me. A lot.\n\nThe thing was, Frank was crushing on her too. Mad crushing. Like he should go out and write the girl a poem or something. And Frank's never that way. Usually he avoids girls, because he gets all blushy and stammery when he tries to talk to them. But for Brynn, he was willing to actually, you know, go up to her and try to speak. What could I do but step aside? I couldn't make Frank compete with my magnificence when his heart was practically breaking out of his chest whenever he saw Brynn.\n\n\"So go find her,\" I told him. \"I can keep watch by myself for a while.\"\n\n\"Are you sure?\" he asked.\n\n\"I know I'm the little brother, but I've had as much training as you\u2014\" I began.\n\n\"No,\" Frank interrupted. \"Are you sure it's okay with you . . . about Brynn . . . that I . . .\"\n\nSee, he even gets stammery when he talks about girls. \"I'm sure, I'm sure,\" I promised. \"Ripley actually seems to be getting into real nice mode instead of just camera nice mode. Maybe I'll let her experience the wonder of me.\"\n\nFrank laughed. I've been trying to teach him when things are funny and when they aren't. He still hasn't quite gotten the hang of it.\n\n\"Here are the Band-Aids.\" Frank tossed me the box.\n\n\"Sorry, I couldn't find any antiblush cream for you, bro,\" I said.\n\nHe didn't laugh. See?\n\nI walked out of the closet with a couple of Band-Aids clearly in my hand, in case the cameras were on and anybody cared. Then I headed up the S-shaped staircase and down the hall to the great room, this massive space that was like three or four living rooms combined. It used to have this awesome TV. Now, well, now it still had a great fireplace.\n\nI plopped down on one of the sofas next to Hal. He and George were the only ones there so far. \"Are we really going to have to play charades?\" he asked. The same way he'd ask, \"Are we really going to have to drink pickle juice?\"\n\nI shrugged. \"Nothing else to do. But it's not like it's a challenge or anything. Veronica's not going to come in here and make you.\"\n\n\"Hey, let's psych the girls out,\" said George. \"Let's say we want the teams to be guys against girls. We can write up the list of charade ideas right now and substitute them for whatever ones the girls team comes up with. Then we'll be able to guess the movie titles or whatever they are in seconds.\"\n\n\"Uh, but the girls will realize that we aren't guessing the stuff that they came up with. If you shout out a movie title that they didn't write down, they'll know we're cheating.\" Not that I was planning to cheat anyway. It was interesting that George was so up front about wanting to cheat, though\u2014since we were all in a competition together.\n\n\"Oh, okay. Then maybe we could\u2014\" He stopped abruptly as Georgina and Ripley came in.\n\nGeorgina narrowed her eyes at her brother. \"What were you just talking about?\" she demanded. \"He has his guilty face on,\" she told Ripley.\n\n\"Nothing,\" George said.\n\nI wasn't getting into this one. I wasn't on a mission to make sure there was no foul play in charades.\n\n\"You were trying to figure out a way to cheat,\" she accused. \"He is humiliatingly bad at charades. He never guesses anything,\" she added to the rest of us. \"I'm sure he was afraid of shaming himself. He actually started crying once because he didn't know what one of the words he was supposed to act out even meant.\"\n\n\"I was seven!\" George shouted. \"Will you stop telling people these stupid stories?\"\n\n\"When you stop doing stupid things,\" Georgina told him sweetly.\n\n\"I am going to be so happy to get away from you. As soon as I win the mil, I'm getting legally emancipated. I'm moving out. I'm never going to have to look at you again. Or Dad. That bloated control freak.\"\n\n\"Yeah, this is it. Dad's gone too far. Legal emancipation is the only option. I'm not even going home after I leave here.\"\n\n\"You'll have to,\" George told his sister. \"Because you won't have any money to live on, so you'll be at home, seeing the face every day, hearing the lectures. I'll be in my own place.\"\n\n\"We'll see,\" Georgina told him. The words came out sounding like, In your dreams.\n\n\"No, you'll\u2014\" George started.\n\n\"Keep at it!\" James called out as he entered the room. \"Go on and take each other out. It wasn't really fair that they brought you two in late anyway.\"\n\nThere was a serious edge of anger to his voice. Had James been so angry to have two new players in the game that he'd decided to try to take one out? He was almost lethally competitive.\n\nSUSPECT PROFILE\n\nName: James Sittenfeld\n\nHometown: Huntley, Wyoming\n\nPhysical description: 5'11\", 220 lbs., short hair with skull and crossbones cut into the back.\n\nOccupation: High school student\n\nBackground: Extreme sports fan, youngest of three brothers, average grades.\n\nSuspicious behavior: Very aggressive in presenting his desire to win.\n\nSuspected of: Sabotaging Georgina's dirt bike.\n\nPossible motive: Losing isn't an option.\n\n\"Worried?\" George asked. \"You should be. Georgina would have kicked everybody's behind in the race today. She might not look like it, but she's a total extreme spots fan.\"\n\nInteresting how George jumped to his sister's defense against an outsider. Also interesting how sure he'd been that she'd win today's competition. George badly wanted out of his house. Did he want it badly enough to sabotage his sister? To risk injuring her? Possibly killing her?\n\nSUSPECT PROFILE\n\nName: George Taggart\n\nHometown: Charlotte, North Carolina\n\nPhysical description: 5'11\", 170 lbs., blond hair, blue eyes.\n\nOccupation: High school student\n\nBackground: Spoiled child of rich parents; Georgina's twin brother.\n\nSuspicious behavior: Knows Georgina would have won dirt bike race.\n\nSuspected of: Sabotaging Georgina's dirt bike.\n\nPossible motive: Wants to win money to become legally emancipated.\n\n## Deeply Disturbed\n\nStrategy. I needed a strategy.\n\nIt's not that I can't think on my feet. I can improvise. I have to do it on missions all the time. But I'm definitely more comfortable with a well-thought-out plan. With maps and schematics and facts I can memorize before going into an unknown situation.\n\nTalking to a girl I liked . . . that was pretty much uncharted territory. I'd had some crushes, yeah. But I usually avoided them, to avoid the embarrassment of turning into a guy who lost 60 percent of his capacity to think, and 80 percent of his capacity to form words.\n\nAnd how I felt about Brynn . . . it wasn't a crush. I think Joe got that before I did. I don't know how to describe it exactly\u2014\n\n###   JOE\n\nJoe here to help my bro out. The way you describe it is loooove.\n\n###   FRANK\n\nGet out. This is my section. \"Loooove\" isn't the word I'd use. \"Loooove\" isn't a word at all. The word \"love\"\u2014which is a word\u2014isn't what I'd use either. But how I felt around Brynn . . . it was good. I should be able to say it better than that. All I can tell you is, the more I was around her, the more I wanted to be around her. And I wanted to be around her right now.\n\nI didn't bother checking the basement. There was nothing down there. The bowling alley was locked. The exercise equipment had been removed from the gym. The sauna had been hacked up by a chain saw. I'd had to do the hacking. Don't ask. There's been way too much badness at this house in the past few weeks to go through it all.\n\nI made a pass through the kitchen and the dining room, then decided to stop by the billiard room\u2014the former billiard room\u2014where the Deprivation Chamber was. The chamber was a booth with a camera in it where any of us contestants could go and vent about anything that was bugging us. I couldn't believe any of the real contestants here voluntarily went in there. You knew whatever you said was going to end up on TV.\n\nBut maybe Brynn had felt like venting. She'd seemed upset when she left the group.\n\nI stepped into the room, my footsteps echoing on the polished wooden floor. The big room felt empty. \"Brynn?\" I called out, just to be sure. No answer. As I turned back toward the door, I caught sight of something white out of the corner of my eye. A sheet of sketch paper lying on the ground.\n\nProbably one of Hal's drawings of L-62, I thought as I headed over to retrieve it.\n\nThe back of my neck prickled when I picked the piece of paper up. It wasn't one of Hal's drawings. It was some words written in what looked like a child's handwriting. It read HOUSE OF DEATH.\n\nExactly the same words that had been written on the chamber wall. The handwriting looked the same too. Was this a practice sheet?\n\nI carefully folded the sheet of paper and put it in my pocket. I needed to discuss this with Joe. But first I'd find Brynn. I wanted to make sure she was all right. And, okay, I just wanted to be around her for a few minutes. I went upstairs and down the hall to the room Brynn shared with Georgina and Olivia. Gail and Olivia sat on Olivia's bed, their heads close together. \"What are you doing in here?\" Gail asked.\n\n\"The door was open,\" I said. \"I was looking for Brynn.\"\n\n\"Haven't seen her,\" Gail told me. She shifted her body, shoving something behind her.\n\nWhich of course made me want to know what it was. I wouldn't be a detective if it didn't. I walked over and sat down on the bed across from them. \"It was pretty intense down there with Veronica, wasn't it?\"\n\n\"Veronica's not as bad as some other people,\" Olivia answered.\n\n\"Really? Veronica's pretty slimy,\" I said, not caring if this was getting filmed or not. I casually leaned back on the bed. I could almost see what Gail had hidden.\n\n\"Veronica didn't accuse us of murder today,\" Olivia reminded me. \"That was the newly nicest person in the world. Ripley.\"\n\n\"My brother pretty much said the same thing to me after you left,\" I told her. \"Everyone was accusing everyone. We're all freaked out.\" I rolled onto my side and propped my head on my hand.\n\nYes! I could see it now. Gail was hiding a sketchbook behind her. Could it be the sketchbook the sheet of paper with the note on it had come from?\n\n\"Hey, did you find Hal's sketchbook? He's been looking all over for it.\" A lie. But you've got to be a good liar when you're an ATAC agent. \"You know how obsessed he is with his drawings of that planet.\"\n\n\"This one's mine,\" Gail said quickly. \"Hal's not the only one who likes to draw. I take art for every elective I can. I even won a prize once for a poster I made. Got fifty dollars.\"\n\nGail wasn't such a good liar. She gave way too much detail. And she looked up as she talked, like she was trying to find the answers up in her brain.\n\n\"Cool,\" I answered. \"Can I see some of your stuff?\"\n\n\"No,\" Olivia answered.\n\nI laughed. \"Is she your manager?\" I asked Gail.\n\n\"I already asked her if I could see,\" Olivia explained. \"She told me she never shows anybody anything until it's completely finished, and she doesn't have anything done yet.\"\n\n\"Well, if you finish something, tell me,\" I said. I stood up. \"I'm going to go see if I can find Brynn. Everybody's going to play charades in the great room, if you guys are up for it.\"\n\n\"I'm not ready to hang with Ripley right now,\" said Olivia.\n\n\"I think I'll stay here too,\" Gail told me.\n\nI nodded and left the room. My brain was whirring as I mentally reshuffled Joe's and my suspect list. I decided I needed to bump Gail and Olivia up. There was something they didn't want me to see in that sketchbook. Was it where they practiced writing in that kidlike way? Were they teaming up to sabotage the rest of the contestants?\n\nSUSPECT PROFILE\n\nName: Gail Digby\n\nHometown: St. Louis, Missouri\n\nPhysical description: 5'9\", 145 lbs., sandy hair, brown eyes.\n\nOccupation: High school student\n\nBackground: Oldest of three kids raised by single mother. Grew up in severe poverty.\n\nSuspicious behavior: Trying to keep sketchbook hidden.\n\nSuspected of: Sabotaging Georgina's dirt bike; writing the message in the Deprivation Chamber.\n\nPossible motive: Winning the millions could change her life and the lives of her family members.\n\nSUSPECT PROFILE\n\nName: Olivia Gavener\n\nHometown: Homestead, Florida\n\nPhysical description: 5'7\", 140 lbs., red hair, freckles, brown eyes.\n\nOccupation: High school student\n\nBackground: Oldest of five kids, family on welfare, helps out with paycheck from fast-food job.\n\nSuspicious behavior: Contemptuous of rich people; always strategizing how to win.\n\nSuspected of: Sabotaging Georgina's dirt bike; writing the message in the Deprivation Chamber.\n\nPossible motive: Needs money to continue to help family and have a different life.\n\nI took a fast look in the great room to see if Brynn had rejoined the group. Nope. I continued down the hall, deciding to try the library next. I'd run into Brynn there once. That's where I had my first real conversation with her. And actually, I had no plan or strategy then, because I didn't know it was going to happen.\n\nNow that I thought about it, it had been easy to talk to her that day. Maybe that's what made what I felt for Brynn\u2014whatever I should be calling it\u2014different from a crush.\n\nThe library door was ajar, and I pushed it open. Brynn stood inside. For a second I felt like I was in free fall. Like I'd just done a bungee jump and the cord hadn't started to pull me back yet.\n\n\"This isn't a bad place to hang, even now that we've been deprived of all the books and magazines,\" I said from the doorway.\n\nBrynn didn't answer. She didn't turn toward me. She was staring at one of the walls. I didn't remember there being a painting on it or anything.\n\nI took a few steps toward her. Then I saw it. Someone had drawn in crayon on the pale wall-paper. Pressing down so hard in places that the paper had torn.\n\n\"What is that even supposed to be?\" I asked, hurrying over to Brynn. One figure in the picture was clearly a little blond girl, drawn the way a little kid would do it. Big head. Stick neck. Those hands that look like mittens. The other . . . it was some kind of creature. Blank eyed, with claws almost as long as its body.\n\nIt took me a moment to realize that Brynn hadn't answered. I pulled my gaze away from the drawing to her. She was still staring at the wall, her eyes dull and blank.\n\n\"Brynn! Are you okay?\" I touched her shoulder, and she started.\n\n\"Frank!\" She blinked rapidly. \"I didn't even hear you come in. I saw this\"\u2014she jerked her hand toward the drawing\u2014\"and it completely freaked me out.\"\n\n\"It is pretty creepy,\" I agreed.\n\n\"The way the demon is about to grab her.\" She shook her head hard.\n\n\"Demon? Is that what you think it's supposed to be?\" I asked.\n\n\"I guess it could be a basic under-the-bed monster,\" she answered. \"But with Veronica bringing up the story about Nina and how her father told her that her mother had been taken over by a demon . . . My mind just went there.\"\n\n\"Makes total sense. It's probably what whoever drew it wanted us to think,\" I said. \"Somebody's trying to scare us. Keep us thinking about the curse, about the house's history.\"\n\n\"Well, it worked. I'm officially scared,\" Brynn admitted.\n\n\"Maybe it's something Veronica and the producers came up with. I can see them trying to add extra excitement,\" I suggested.\n\nThe motivation made sense to me. But there were a lot of puzzle pieces that didn't fit with that theory. The sketchbook Olivia and Gail really didn't want me to see, for one. Georgina's sabotaged brakes, for another. Trying to make us think the house was cursed was a lot different from actually putting a player's life in danger.\n\nAnd there was still the glass that had been mixed with the ice in James's water. Mary had insisted she hadn't done that when the police came to take her away. She'd confessed to everything else. The e-mail threats. The dead bird. The wood rolling off the woodpile on top of me. Putting the rattler in Ripley's bed. Everything but the glass. Why bother to deny it, if she'd really done it? Still, the glass in the ice didn't seem like something Veronica and company would do.\n\n\"I don't see Veronica doing this,\" Brynn said.\n\n\"Really? Why?\" I was curious to hear her take on the situation at Deprivation House.\n\nBrynn reached down and flicked on a light switch at knee level on the wall. Weird place for it. The light made the drawing look even more unnatural.\n\nShe ran her fingers across it, then trembled as they snagged on a ripped piece of wallpaper. \"This wasn't done by somebody rational, somebody thinking of TV ratings.\" She turned to face me. \"Frank, whoever drew this is deeply disturbed. Truly, seriously unbalanced.\"\n\n## Silent Girl Screams\n\n\"I agree with Brynn,\" Olivia said. \"Whoever drew that is one messed-up individual.\"\n\nFrank and Brynn had called the rest of us down to the library. We were staring at the drawing Brynn had discovered.\n\n\"Either that, or one great strategy mastermind,\" Frank commented.\n\nWas that aimed at Olivia? She was the player most concerned with strategy. She'd even organized a secret alliance. I only knew about it because Frank had told me.\n\nAnn's deep into strategy too, I reminded myself. The whole reason she never talked was because she thought revealing any info about herself could give the competition an advantage.\n\n\"I'm sticking with my theory that the producers are behind all this demon curse stuff,\" I said.\n\n\"Yeah? I think one of you did it,\" James announced. \"One of you standing in this room right now, acting all innocent.\"\n\n\"Does that include you?\" I asked, interested to see what reaction I'd get. \"You came back into the mansion pretty fast after Veronica played her I-know-a-secret game. What did you do? Maybe a little drawing.\" I jerked my chin toward the wall.\n\nJames had some . . . let's call them anger management issues, and the way the crayon had ripped into the wallpaper seemed Jamesian to me somehow.\n\n\"Have I entered a time warp? Didn't everyone just say all this stuff?\" asked Hal. \"Scary thing, accusations.\" He shook his head. \"Clearly, talking about it isn't going to solve it. No one's going to confess. We're going to go around and around and around and get nowhere.\"\n\n\"You have something better to do, nerd boy?\" James demanded. \"I'm thinking you don't want to talk about it because you have something to hide.\" His eyes narrowed. \"Who have we all seen drawing away the whole time we've been here?\"\n\n\"Hal,\" said Olivia quickly.\n\n\"Those are schematics. Plans. They are highly detailed and precise,\" Hal protested. \"Nothing like what's on the wall. It looks like a kid drew it.\"\n\n\"Yeah,\" Frank agreed. \"To me it seems likely that whoever wrote that message in the chamber drew the picture. That writing looked like it had been done by a little kid, and Hal's right about the drawing. It definitely seems like it was made by a child.\" He glanced over at Olivia and Gail, who were standing close together. \"Or at least someone who wants to give that impression.\"\n\n\"So you're saying it could still be the nerd,\" James said. \"Only he changed his style to get us off track.\"\n\n\"I didn't exactly\u2014\" Frank began.\n\n\"You know what?\" Gail interrupted. \"I just realized James wasn't the only one who left the group early after our little meeting with Veronica. Brynn, you left early too.\"\n\n\"You think Brynn made the drawing and then pretended to find it? That's extra twisted,\" Olivia said.\n\n\"Why are we thinking that the drawing had to have been made today?\" I asked. \"Did anyone go into the library before Brynn?\"\n\n\"That's what we're trying to find out, boy genius,\" James answered. \"Who came in and did the drawing.\"\n\n\"I mean did anyone\u2014not the perp\u2014come into the library earlier today?\" I clarified.\n\n\"Perp. Now he's all hard-core.\" James sneered.\n\nShoot, I had to be careful not to be so obvious about my training.\n\n\"I didn't come to the library before now,\" Georgina answered.\n\nI got no's and head shakes from everybody else. \"So we don't know when the drawing was done. It could have been last night. That would make sense, since we're pretty sure the show doesn't waste the camera time it has filming us sleeping.\"\n\n\"So we don't know anything,\" said Gail.\n\n\"I still say it's someone in this room,\" James insisted.\n\n\"And I say he who smelt it dealt it,\" George answered.\n\nJames jerked his head toward George. \"What is that supposed to mean?\"\n\nGeorge raised his eyebrows. \"I guess they don't teach analogies in public school. What it means is, you're the one who started all the accusations about the drawing. That's the 'smelt it' part. Am I talking slowly enough? And I think you're the one who actually did the drawing. That would be the 'dealt it' part.\"\n\n\"Want to see what I learned in public school?\" James asked. He didn't wait for an answer. He launched himself at George and knocked him to the ground.\n\n\"Smash his smug rich-boy face in!\" Olivia shouted.\n\nI knew she had an attitude about rich people, but\u2014wow.\n\nJames pinned George with a knee to the stomach. \"I learned how to fight!\" James yelled. Then he slammed George in the jaw.\n\nGeorge pretty much just . . . squirmed.\n\nI figured as a rich boy myself\u2014at least as long as I was undercover\u2014I had to step in. I rushed over and locked one arm around James's thick neck. A couple of moves and he was on his back, with my knee on his chest.\n\n\"Rich boys also take martial arts,\" I told him.\n\n\"That's right!\" said George as his twin helped him off the ground.\n\nIdiot. I shot him a look that I hoped he read as I'm not going to save your pampered rear twice.\n\n\"So, we're in agreement. We don't know who did this?\" I asked the whole group the question, but I kept my eyes on James. He gave a tiny nod.\n\n\"I keep looking at the drawing,\" Olivia said. \"Is it just me . . . or does the little girl kind of look like Brynn?\"\n\n\"It's practically a stick figure,\" Hal protested.\n\n\"Same hair,\" Olivia pointed out. \"And the way the nose is drawn, it looks like it turns up at the end, the way Brynn's does.\"\n\n\"And Georgina's,\" her twin observed. \"She has the hair, too.\"\n\n\"I am now officially creeped out,\" Georgina announced.\n\nI looked over at Brynn to see how she was reacting. She was staring at the drawing, her eyes almost glazed. Then she gave her head a hard shake. \"I think I've looked at it long enough. I'm going to go take a special Deprivation House cold shower. I'm never taking hot water for granted again!\"\n\nAfter she left, Hal stepped closer to the drawing and ran his finger over the picture of the girl. \"I don't see it.\"\n\n\"If the girl is supposed to be Brynn or Georgina, are we supposed to think that demon beastie thing is real too?\" asked Gail.\n\n\"I hope so,\" James said. \"Charades is way too boring. And we don't have any TV. If there's a demon in the house, I hope it makes an appearance. Can't they do your bidding if you sell them your soul?\" He tilted his head back and threw out his arms. \"My soul is up for grabs if you could arrange for a\u2014\"\n\n\"Stop it!\" Ann shrieked.\n\nWe all stared at her. Ann hardly ever talked. Hearing her let out a scream like that was shocking.\n\n\"What's your impairment?\" James asked.\n\n\"You can't invite a demon to come to you like that!\" Ann cried. \"It's not some joke. Don't you know how dangerous it is? The demon will take over your body, your mind. It will make you do horrible things. And when it finally leaves, you'll be insane. If your body doesn't completely give out. Do you want to die?\"\n\nThose were more words than Ann\u2014formerly known as Silent Girl\u2014had spoken the entire time we'd been at Deprivation House.\n\n\"That's messed up,\" Olivia said softly.\n\nI was hit by what Olivia had said when she first looked at the drawing. Whoever drew that is one messed-up individual.\n\nI didn't know if I'd call Ann messed up. But she'd definitely shown that she had some deep feelings the rest of us hadn't known about. Disturbing feelings. She'd hidden them really well. What else had she been able to hide?\n\nSUSPECT PROFILE\n\nName: Ann Sommerfeld\n\nHometown: Plano, Texas\n\nPhysical description: 5'5\", 120 lbs., brown hair, brown eyes.\n\nOccupation: High school student\n\nBackground: Only child. Parents deceased. Raised by grandmother.\n\nSuspicious behavior: Hysterical over possibility of demon. Very competitive\u2014rarely speaks, so she won't give anything away that can be used against her.\n\nSuspected of: Sabotaging Georgina's dirt bike. Leaving message in Deprivation Chamber and drawing on the library wall.\n\nPossible motive: Desperate to win.\n\nAnn rubbed her face with both hands. \"Sorry. I didn't mean to go off that way. It's just that what James was doing was so perilous. It really scared me.\"\n\n\"Maybe you should sit down,\" suggested Frank. \"Do you want some water?\"\n\n\"No, I'm fine,\" Ann answered.\n\n\"Maybe we should go back to the great room,\" I said. \"We've seen what there is to see here.\"\n\n\"Yeah.\" Frank started for the door\u2014and froze as a long, terrified scream blasted down the hall.\n\n\"It's the demon!\" Ann cried. \"It answered the summoning!\"\n\n## Ripped Apart\n\nBrynn! I knew that scream had come from Brynn. I tore out of the library and down to the girls bathroom.\n\nShe stood outside with her back pressed tight against the door. Like she was trying to keep something trapped inside. \"Are you okay? What happened?\" I exclaimed.\n\n\"What's in there?\" Georgina asked. The rest of the group had reached Brynn only seconds after I did.\n\nBrynn opened her mouth to answer, then shook her head and simply stepped away from the door. \"It's safe to go in?\" I asked.\n\nShe nodded.\n\nI slowly opened the bathroom door. I sucked in my breath with a hiss when I saw what was inside.\n\n\"What's in there?\" Georgina asked again, her voice louder and higher, more scared.\n\nJames, Joe, and Olivia followed me into the bathroom. \"It's a bloody teddy bear,\" Olivia called. \"It's so gross, you guys.\"\n\nThe bear had been clawed open. Its stuffing lay all over the floor. One of its eyes was gone.\n\nAnn pushed her way inside. \"The demon did this. They start small sometimes, before they have full power in this world. But that's what it wants to do. To all of us.\"\n\n\"The red stuff is just ketchup,\" said Joe. \"You think the demon wants to cover us with ketchup?\"\n\nAnn didn't smile.\n\n\"Whose bear is it, anyway?\" I asked.\n\n\"It's Brynn's,\" Ann answered.\n\nOlivia's eyes widened. \"Maybe I was right about the girl in the drawing looking like Brynn. Maybe the demon really is coming after her, like in the picture.\"\n\n\"Do you really believe in demons?\" Joe asked.\n\n\"How can you doubt their existence after seeing this?\" Ann swept her arm toward the teddy bear carnage.\n\n\"Humans are capable of doing something like that too,\" Joe commented.\n\n\"Don't tempt a demon to show its power,\" Ann warned, then left the room.\n\nJoe raised his eyebrows at me. Then he gave a half smile. \"Maybe somebody should go check on Brynn.\"\n\n\"Practically everybody's out there with her,\" said Olivia.\n\n\"I'll go see how she's doing,\" I said, trying to sound like it was no big deal.\n\n\"You do that,\" Joe said, his smile widening.\n\nYou know, while he can be annoying a large percentage of the time, Joe is actually a good brother.\n\nBrynn hadn't gotten far. She was sitting next to the bathroom door, leaning against the wall. Everyone else stood around in clusters, talking quietly. It didn't look like another fight was going to break out tonight.\n\n\"Hey,\" I said to her. \"You want to maybe go out on the balcony, get some air?\" I knew the balcony was one of her favorite places.\n\n\"Air would be good. I think I forgot to keep breathing about half an hour ago,\" Brynn answered.\n\nI reached down and grabbed her hand so I could help pull her to her feet. I got this little jolt. Kind of like a static electricity shock. Except in a good way.\n\n\"Crazy night, huh?\" I asked as we started through the house.\n\n\"I really need to talk about something not here,\" Brynn answered. \"Tell me some random thing about you. Anything.\"\n\nI hesitated. I wanted to answer as Frank Hardy, not Frank Dooley. I wanted to be my real self with Brynn. But there'd always be this huge chunk of stuff I'd have to keep hidden. I couldn't talk about my actual family or town or school.\n\n\"Come on. Anything. I'm not asking for deep, dark secrets. This isn't a Veronica torture session,\" Brynn said. She opened the glass doors to the balcony, and we stepped out. \"You can tell me your favorite flavor of ice cream if you want. I don't care. As long as you say something completely unrelated to Deprivation House.\"\n\nI didn't see any reason why Frank Hardy and Frank Dooley couldn't have the same favorite ice cream, at least. We did share a tongue and taste buds and a stomach. \"Vanilla,\" I told her.\n\n\"That's it? Just vanilla?\" she asked. \"Not Vanilla CocoMocho or Vanilla Nutso?\"\n\n\"Just vanilla,\" I said. Joe's the one who likes his ice cream stuffed with candy and nuts and pretzel bits and all that. I'm always telling him there's no ice cream in his ice cream.\n\n\"I like my ice cream straight up too. Otherwise you can't really taste it.\" She braced her hands on the balcony railing and stared down at the fountain. \"I do enjoy the cone, though. I never eat ice cream from a dish if I can help it.\"\n\n\"Yeah.\" I realized I wasn't having any talking-to-girls anxiety. Maybe because conversations with Brynn were a little . . . odd. Or maybe because she made me feel like I'd already known her forever.\n\n\"So are you going to reveal your favorite flavor?\" I asked.\n\n\"Don't have one,\" Brynn answered. \"Or maybe I do, but I don't like to admit it.\" She lowered her voice to a whisper. \"I think it hurts the other ones' feelings.\" She laughed. \"You're going to think I'm as wackadoo as Ann. I heard all that demon stuff she was saying when she looked at the bear.\" Her face turned serious.\n\n\"I thought we were having a no-Deprivation-House conversation,\" I said.\n\n\"It creeps in,\" Brynn answered. She sighed. \"I end up thinking about the house and everything all the time. Like the demon story. I can't believe a dad would tell his little girl her mother was possessed by a demon.\"\n\nI looked down at the fountain for a moment. They hadn't turned it off as a deprivation yet. It was lit up at night, and right now the water was glistening under the beams.\n\n\"Maybe he thought it was a way for her to understand her mother's drinking and drug use,\" I finally said. \"Not that I think it was a good way. But maybe he was trying to get across the idea that when her mother was on those drugs, she wasn't the same person.\"\n\n\"You think the demon story started before the night of the murder?\" Brynn asked.\n\nI shrugged. \"I'm just trying to make sense of it.\"\n\n\"So the mom\u2014the actress\u2014had just come back from rehab, but she immediately had a relapse and went after the kid. And the father had to kill her,\" Brynn said. \"It's really hideous. Then the girl had to testify and everything. It's sick the way Veronica talks about it and makes sure it's all on camera.\"\n\nI nodded. \"If she and the producers are behind that drawing and what happened with your bear, it's even worse.\"\n\n\"Taking some family's tragedy and twisting it into entertainment. It's disgusting.\" Brynn threw her arms out wide. \"I hope this is all getting on camera. I hope it makes the cut!\" she added loudly.\n\n\"Did you know humans have forty-six chromosomes, peas have fourteen, and crawdads have two hundred?\" It was the first thing that came into my head.\n\n\"That's so cool! Crawdads must be hiding some truly superhuman powers,\" Brynn exclaimed. \"Thanks for the subject change, Frank. Let's see if we can last five whole minutes without even thinking of all the creepy stuff in this place.\"\n\nI was definitely up for trying. But I wasn't sure it was possible.\n\n\"Good morning, everyone,\" Veronica said as we sat around the table eating our cold cereal. We'd lost the right to hot food days ago. \"Eat well. It's a competition day!\"\n\n\"It's cereal,\" James grumbled. \"How well can we eat?\"\n\nI was sure that comment would end up in the footage we'd be viewing before Veronica told us who was the next person to be eliminated. Staying at Deprivation House was all about being able to deal with the deprivations without getting whiny.\n\n\"George, that bruise on your face looks so painful,\" Veronica commented. \"How did you get it?\" I couldn't decide if Veronica's question was sincere. She knew a lot about what went on in the house. But even she couldn't see everything.\n\n\"Walked into a door,\" George muttered. Probably too embarrassed to admit he got hit.\n\n\"Oh. I'm relieved to hear it,\" Veronica said. \"It looks more like an injury from a fistfight. And I'd hate to think there was any kind of friction between our contestants.\"\n\nNow that, I knew, wasn't sincere. Veronica would love any kind of friction.\n\n\"Especially with today's competition,\" Veronica continued. \"Your relationships with one another are going to be important.\" She smiled. \"But I don't want to say too much. You'll have to wait until this afternoon. Meet me at the fountain at three.\" And she was gone.\n\nAs soon as Olivia had downed her cereal, she signaled for me to meet her in the supply closet. She got Hal and Gail to meet us in there too. \"Okay,\" she said. \"I think today's competition is going to involve teams. That's what I got from Veronica. What about the rest of you?\"\n\n\"Possibly,\" Hal said. \"But not definitely.\"\n\n\"I'm not saying it's definite,\" Olivia snapped. \"I'm saying it's possible. Will you all agree with that?\"\n\nWe all quickly agreed. Olivia was in complete drill sergeant mode.\n\n\"What the 'alliance' needs to do\u2014oh, clearly Gail is part of the alliance now,\" Olivia began.\n\nI wasn't sure \"alliance\" was exactly the right word. Maybe dictatorship?\n\n\"What we need to do is make sure the rich kids don't win the competition. An alliance member needs to win. If that means your individual team losing, fine.\"\n\n\"So you're saying we should sabotage our teammate if they aren't in the alliance?\" Hal asked.\n\n\"Exactly,\" Olivia answered.\n\nWas Olivia behind Georgina's accident? Was she behind the drawing and the message in the chamber? Was she trying to recruit some help right now? I wasn't sure. But I was definitely sure this was a bad idea.\n\n\"What's the point?\" I said. Olivia narrowed her eyes at me.\n\n\"The point is what it's always been since we formed the alliance. To win. The whole enchilada. One of us right here is going to win the million, and we're going to split it four ways,\" Olivia explained impatiently.\n\nThe stress of the competition was getting to her. She hadn't been this irritable and bossy when she first asked me to join the alliance. Or maybe she has been, but she was just hiding it because she knew she needed to be nice until I said yes.\n\n\"I know the purpose of the alliance,\" I said, trying to keep annoyance out of my own voice. \"But it doesn't really matter who wins the competition. It's just for the show. It doesn't actually have anything to do with winning or losing the money, if you think about it.\"\n\n\"Winning the competition means controlling the next deprivation,\" Olivia told me, speaking slowly, exaggerating each word, like she was trying to teach me to talk. \"Controlling the deprivation gives us power. We can choose a deprivation that will really hurt the other side. I've been studying them. I know their weak spots. I know how to make them hurt.\"\n\nO-kay.\n\nHal cleared his throat. \"Uh, joining the alliance made logical sense to me.\" He did another throat clearing. He sounded nervous. \"It greatly improved my odds of winning a significant amount of money.\"\n\nI could hear the \"but\" coming. It seemed like Olivia could too. The muscles in her jaw had clenched.\n\n\"But,\" Hal went on, \"I didn't know that being in the alliance would involve cheating. I'm not . . . comfortable performing any kind of sabotage.\"\n\n\"What you're saying is that getting your computer game up and running isn't that important to you,\" Gail told him. Olivia shot her a proud smile.\n\n\"I didn't hear him say that,\" I jumped in. \"Have you thought about the fact that if we get caught cheating, we get booted? That means no money.\"\n\nI figured that argument might mean more to Olivia and Gail than talking about right and wrong.\n\n\"Even if we didn't get caught, I'm not willing to hurt somebody to win,\" Hal said, voice cracking.\n\n\"I didn't say hurt. I said make sure they don't win the competition,\" Olivia protested.\n\n\"And you think that can be done in a completely peaceful, nonviolent way?\" I shot back.\n\n\"Are you saying you want out?\" Olivia demanded.\n\n\"No. I'm just trying to get things clear,\" I told her. I definitely needed to stay in the alliance. The person Joe and I were looking for could be right here in this little group.\n\n\"What about him?\" Gail jerked her chin toward Hal.\n\n\"I think I do want out,\" Hal said.\n\nGood for him.\n\n\"Fine. Of course, we'll have to tell the others you were part of an alliance against them,\" said Olivia.\n\n\"What? Why? That will mess you up as much as me,\" Hal protested.\n\n\"It will mess us up. But not as much,\" Olivia answered. \"Because we'll still have each other. We'll still have the alliance.\"\n\nHal stared at the ground. Olivia, Gail, and I stared at him.\n\n\"Well?\" Olivia finally said.\n\n\"I'm in,\" Hal told her, without looking up.\n\n\"You did the right thing.\" Gail patted his shoulder, and Hal flinched. \"Those other kids have tons of money. They've had everything their whole lives. It would be so unfair if one of them got a million dollars.\"\n\n\"Yeah. Gail's family doesn't always even have money for food and heat. I have to contribute the money I make frying burgers to keep our household going,\" Olivia reminded him. \"It would be so wrong for somebody like Brynn to win over Gail. One of Brynn's shoes would probably pay Gail's family's rent for a month. I can't believe she lets Georgina borrow them.\" Olivia shook her head. \"Not the point. The point is that rich people don't need to win. Between Frank and Joe, it would be completely unfair for Joe to get that money.\"\n\n\"Completely,\" Gail agreed. \"We all heard what Veronica said. Joe's dad makes a million times more than Frank's. Frank probably would use the money for stuff like college.\" She looked over at me, and I nodded. \"What would Joe use it for? A second car? 'Cause you know he already has one.\"\n\n\"You know it,\" Olivia said. \"You must be so furious at him, Frank. Now that you know how he's been living all these years. I mean, don't you look at him sometimes and think, 'I would really like to kill my brother'?\"\n\n## Psycho Teammate\n\n\"What did you tell her?\" I repeated. \"I just want to know.\"\n\n\"That's not the point,\" Frank answered. He shifted uncomfortably on his seat at the edge of the tub. I'd scored the closed toilet seat. It was the most comfortable spot in our \"conference room.\"\n\n\"I'm giving you a heads-up,\" he continued. \"If you're paired up with Gail, Olivia, and maybe even Hal, you have to watch out for sabotage. I don't know if Hal's actually going to do anything. But Olivia and Gail were pushing hard, and Olivia is definitely going to be watching him.\"\n\n\"I just want to hear what you told her when she asked you if you wanted to kill me,\" I said. Sometimes I can't resist torturing Frank a little.\n\nHe sighed. \"You realize I'm undercover.\"\n\nI waved my hand in a hurry-it-up motion.\n\n\"I told her that when I couldn't fall asleep I did sometimes imagine different ways that I could off you and get away with it,\" he admitted.\n\nI laughed. \"I've been doing that for years about you! Many of my scenarios involve cleaning supplies, because everyone knows you're way into cleanliness and I'm a slob.\"\n\nFrank decided to take the mature route. Otherwise known as the boring route. \"Just be careful, okay?\" he said.\n\nI nodded. \"You have no idea what form this sabotage might take?\"\n\n\"None. It's up to the individual alliance member. We act alone. If we get caught, we get thrown out of the contest alone,\" Frank told me.\n\n\"You think Gail or Olivia wrecked Georgina's brakes?\" I asked.\n\n\"Definite possibility,\" Frank answered. \"I think they should be high on our suspect list for anything bad that's directed at one of you rich brats.\"\n\nIt's so cute when Frank tries to be funny.\n\n\"I'm even thinking that Georgina and Gail could be behind that drawing in the library and the message on the chamber wall,\" Frank went on. \"When I went looking for Brynn yesterday, I found a sheet of paper from a sketchbook. Same words as on the Deprivation Chamber wall. Same handwriting. I figured it was a practice draft.\"\n\n\"Sketchbook, huh?\" I said. \"That makes me think of Hal right off. He almost always has his with him.\"\n\n\"That was my first reaction too. But then I went upstairs to Brynn's room, and I saw Olivia and Gail talking. Gail hid something behind her back. I finally got a look at it\u2014\"\n\n\"And it was a sketchbook,\" I finished for Frank. \"It's interesting that Olivia's the one who pointed out that the girl in the picture looked like Brynn. That fits with the whole destroy-the-rich campaign.\"\n\n\"And it was Brynn's teddy bear that became a demon sacrifice. Freaking out Brynn would definitely throw her off her game,\" Frank added. \"Olivia didn't say anything about the drawing or the bear at the alliance meeting. You'd think she'd want to make sure that Hal and I didn't get spooked along with Brynn and the rest of you. She should want us focused.\"\n\n\"Maybe there's an alliance within the alliance,\" I suggested. \"Maybe the girls are playing the two of you guys. Maybe they're planning to use you to help eliminate some of the competition, but cut you out later.\"\n\n\"If Olivia wins, I think she's going to forget how to even pronounce the word 'alliance,'\" Frank predicted.\n\n\"Joe, your partner for this competition will be . . .\" Veronica smiled.\n\nI got this ate-way-too-many-hot-dogs-way-too-fast feeling in my gut.\n\n\"Olivia,\" she concluded.\n\nOf course. Perfect. The girl who wanted every rich person dead, dead, dead. Who thought my own brother probably fantasized about killing me.\n\nThis is a good thing, I told myself. You're a highly trained ATAC agent. You can handle whatever sabotage Olivia decides to throw at you. You wouldn't want her paired with someone who didn't have any advance warning\u2014or any skillz.\n\nFrank hates that word, just FYI. Skillz. He hates any word that has a z where he thinks there should be an s. I know way too many facts like this about my brother.\n\nVeronica kept on matching up the pairs as we stood around her on the front patio. Here's how it laid down. Frank and Ann. She showed up for the competition looking like a goth girl ready for a night out. She'd made some kind of weird charm out of twigs and string and hair. But after seeing Ann lose it last night, I knew she wasn't making a fashion statement. That stuff had to be antidemon protection. She was one scared weird girl.\n\nBrynn and Ripley got teamed up. Georgina and Hal. I wondered if Hal would try anything to sabotage Georgina. It sounded like Olivia\u2014with backup from Gail\u2014had put some real fear into him.\n\n\"That leaves James, George, and Gail,\" Veronica said. \"Hmmm. An odd number.\"\n\nJames's hand shot up. \"I'll go solo,\" he volunteered.\n\n\"Why am I not surprised to hear that?\" Veronica asked. \"Why do I suspect that the words 'does not play well with others' were featured on many of your elementary school progress reports?\"\n\nI noticed George's hand go up to the bruise on his jaw. I'm sure he was praying that Veronica would go ahead and let James play by himself.\n\nGeorge didn't know Veronica that well yet, or he wouldn't have bothered. She liked to do things in whatever way would make the most people unhappy. \"No, I think I'll give Gail the chance to prove what she can do on her own. Gail, you seem like something of a follower to me. This will be a good opportunity for you, I promise.\"\n\n\"It's not fair,\" Olivia muttered.\n\n\"There's nothing in the rules requiring fairness on the producers' side,\" Veronica stated, looking pleased with herself. She turned to James. \"That means you and George will be a team.\"\n\n\"Good,\" George said quickly.\n\nHe'd figured out that attitude was the difference between staying at Deprivation House and getting kicked out.\n\nJames rolled his eyes but managed not to say anything that the judges wouldn't like when they were deciding who had to hear the words, \"You are deprived of the chance to win one million dollars,\" during the next elimination.\n\nStill, I was pretty sure that if team James-George lost today, there'd be another fight to break up. Cameras on or not.\n\n\"Now, on to the competition,\" Veronica said. \"Perhaps those of you with families wealthy enough to hire help have heard that some house cleaners don't do windows. Perhaps even those of you whose families don't have so much in the bank haven't had to wash windows either. Maybe your parents take on that chore.\"\n\n\"Or they leave them dirty,\" George said under his breath. \"Poor people don't mind being dirty, do they? Or is it that they can't afford soap?\"\n\nI felt like punching the guy myself. Just because I was undercover as a rich kid didn't mean I couldn't think he was a complete wad. Did it?\n\nI reminded myself that I wasn't here to teach George Taggart manners. Or James. Or anybody else. I was here to stop a murder. The lives of every contestant had been threatened.\n\n\"As you may have noticed, we have lots of windows at Deprivation House,\" Veronica continued. She flicked one hand in the direction of the mansion. Oh, man. I can't believe I hadn't noticed before. It looked like somebody had sprayed down each of those windows with an oily, gray-green goop. I didn't especially want to think about what it was.\n\n\"We have so many windows that I guarantee each of the teams will get a chance to wash some,\" Veronica told us. \"At least those teams that want a chance at winning today.\" She clapped her hands. \"What are you waiting for? Go ahead and get started!\"\n\n\"With what?\" Georgina asked.\n\n\"Look around,\" said Veronica. \"There may be some useful items lying about.\"\n\n\"Forget that,\" said James. \"I'm getting to work right now.\" He raced toward the house, pulling off his T-shirt off as he ran. He used the shirt to scrub the glass of the closest window. All that happened was that he smeared the goo around\u2014and got his shirt covered with the gunk.\n\n\"Idiot!\" George shouted at him. \"You're already losing us time. Help me look for something that will actually work!\"\n\nThe rest of us were already looking. I spotted a bucket hanging from a branch of one of the trees. A branch very near the top. Of course.\n\n\"I'll go get that,\" I said to Olivia in a low voice. I gave my chin a quick jerk toward the bucket. I didn't want to give away its location to anyone else.\n\n\"I'll help,\" Olivia volunteered.\n\n\"That's okay. I got it,\" I said quickly. I definitely didn't want any \"help\" from Olivia when I was that far off the ground!\n\nI didn't wait for her to answer. I took off in the direction of the tree\u2014not going straight for it.\n\n\"Remember that the windows of the upper stories do count!\" Veronica called.\n\nI guessed I also needed to look for a hidden ladder. And some sponges. That should get us started.\n\nI made a sharp turn toward the tree. A second later I was climbing. I could see the branches shaking below me. Somebody else had spotted the bucket. I glanced down. Olivia!\n\n\"I think I can get this one solo,\" I called down to her. \"See if you can find some cloths or sponges or something. Or something we can use for a ladder.\"\n\n\"I think I see a sponge by the bucket,\" Olivia answered.\n\nI squinted up at the top of the tree. Didn't see anything spongy. \"I'll get it while I'm up there,\" I promised.\n\n\"Do you see where I mean?\" Olivia asked. She kept climbing. So did I.\n\n\"Uh, I think so.\" Lie. Which made us equal. I was pretty sure Olivia was lying about seeing any sponges up there. Either she was trying to slow us down, or she was trying to get a chance to shove me out of this tree.\n\n\"Just go! I'll find it when I'm up there, I'm sure.\" I was pretty far up there already.\n\n\"Hal, get that mini tramp!\" Georgina shouted from below. \"George is a trampoline fiend! He'll destroy us on that thing, bouncing up to wash the second-floor windows.\"\n\nI took a glance down. Bad strategy. It was a good idea to nab something the opposition could use to a big advantage. But Georgina had basically announced the location of the tramp to her brother\u2014and he was a lot closer to it than either Hal or Georgina was.\n\n\"George! I saw it first!\" Georgina shrieked. Like that mattered.\n\nI got my attention back on my own prize and kept climbing. There weren't too many great branches in this part of the tree. I picked one I thought would hold me, and jammed my foot on it. . . .\n\nAt the same moment Olivia decided to reach up and use it as a handhold. She jerked the branch back, and my foot was suddenly slamming down into empty space. A second later, my entire body weight was hanging by one hand.\n\n\"Look out!\" Olivia yelled.\n\nLook out. Yeah. For psycho teammates.\n\nI managed to wrap my other hand around the branch, then haul myself up until I could straddle it. Don't doubt that I was hugging the trunk with both arms at that point. The branch I was perched on wasn't much stronger-looking than the one Olivia had managed to bend back.\n\n\"Hey, I see a pair of stilts. Over in the empty pool. We can use them to reach at least some of the higher windows. I've totally got the bucket and whatever else is up there,\" I told Olivia. \"Or you can keep climbing and I'll go for the stilts.\"\n\nIt would look totally suspicious if she thought we should stick together now. Another team could get the stilts\u2014and a big advantage. I knew she wanted our team to lose. But she didn't know I knew, and she didn't want me to know. Got it?\n\n\"I'll go,\" Olivia said. And she started climbing down. A lot more slowly than she'd gone up. I liked the new sabotage method. Slowness. No pain involved for Mr. Joe.\n\nI scrambled up the next couple of branches. They trembled under my feet, but without any assistance from Olivia, they stayed steady enough to stand on. I grabbed the pail and did a sponge check. None. Knew she was lying.\n\nAs I started down the tree, I did a check of the area below me. Olivia hadn't made it to the stilts, but George was already bouncing on the trampoline, trying to get high enough to reach the second-floor windows. James was using a big palm frond to scrape gook off one of the bottom windows on the first floor. For two guys who hated each other, they were a decent team.\n\nGeorge came down on the tramp, and I noticed it sagging. Sagging way more than it should have with just one person on it. \"George!\" I shouted as loudly as I could. \"Get off the trampoline. There's something wrong.\"\n\nHe didn't hear me.\n\nI moved from branch to branch faster. I took time for another fast look at George. Couldn't he feel that something was wrong with the trampoline? I leaped the last five feet down and hit the ground at a run.\n\n\"George!\" I yelled. \"Get off of that!\"\n\n\"We've got him worried!\" James called up to George.\n\nGeorge grinned, did a one and three-quarter somersault, landed on his back, then let the bounce take him to his feet. The bottom of the trampoline had almost touched the ground on the last bounce.\n\n\"Show-off!\" Georgina yelled.\n\nGeorge grinned wider and started to do the move again. A somersault. A three-quarter. But when he landed on his back, he didn't bounce. The trampoline didn't hold his weight, and he fell straight to the ground.\n\nAnd lay still.\n\n## Another One Down\n\nAnn grabbed her charm in both hands. So hard I could hear some of the twigs it was made of snapping. \"It's the demon curse!\" she cried.\n\n\"Come on, Ann. It was an accident,\" I told her. Honestly, I wasn't sure about the accident part. But I was sure a demon wasn't involved.\n\nI rushed over to where James was lying. Ripley was crouched beside him, most of the rest of the group gathered in a loose circle around them. Georgina had her fingers pressed to her lips as she stared down at her brother. His face was pale, his eyes only half open.\n\n\"George, can you hear me?\" Ripley asked.\n\n\"Yeah,\" George croaked out.\n\n\"Don't try to sit up,\" she ordered. \"Can you move your fingers and toes?\"\n\nShe'd clearly had some training. She was launching into the check for a spinal injury.\n\nI watched George closely. He was able to move his toes and fingers as soon as Ripley asked him to. Good.\n\nThen a not-so-good thought struck me. Ripley had been the first one to come to the rescue. The same way she had when Bobby T had his allergic reaction and when the dog attacked Joe. Was she just trying to make herself look like a hero on the show? If she got some good PR, her parents would keep supplying her with cash and clothes and, I don't know, whatever girls want.\n\nRipley didn't plan the allergic reaction or the dog attack, I reminded myself. Mitch had been behind both of those. But if Ripley felt like she needed even more good PR, would she create the situations that would let her get it?\n\nI ran my eyes over the trampoline. The thing looked brand-new. Which made sense. Deprivation House should spring for new equipment, even though they were trying to make us live with as little as possible. It was a safety issue.\n\nSo why hadn't the trampoline held George's weight? A ten-foot tramp like that one should easily handle someone his weight. I had another not-so-good thought. A thought I'd been having too often lately: sabotage.\n\nSUSPECT PROFILE\n\nName: Ripley Lansing\n\nHometown: Malibu, California\n\nPhysical description: 5'10\", 140 lbs., straight brown hair, blue eyes.\n\nOccupation: High school student\/heiress\n\nBackground: Only daughter of rock star dad and cosmetics company CEO\/owner mom. One older brother, one younger. The wild kid of the three.\n\nSuspicious behavior: Often the first one to reach an injured person, winds up being the \"hero.\"\n\nSuspected of: Sabotaging contestants so she can save them.\n\nPossible motive: Needs to improve her bad-girl public image or she'll be financially cut off until she's thirty.\n\nBut had Ripley had time for sabotage? Had she managed to find out ahead of time what the challenge was going to be\u2014or at least that the trampoline was going to be involved\u2014and loosen the springs or distress the canvas in some key places?\n\nOr could she have found the trampoline first, done some fast damage, and left it for someone else to find and hurt themselves so she could come to the rescue?\n\n\"Ripley, out of the way, please. Let the medic take over,\" Veronica called as she strode toward us.\n\n\"I've got it,\" Ripley answered.\n\n\"Yes, I'm sure a high school girl who spends more time at movie premieres and concerts has the equivalent of a medical degree,\" Veronica shot back. \"Move, please.\"\n\nRipley stood up and backed away.\n\n\"Is he going to be okay?\" Georgina asked.\n\n\"It doesn't matter,\" Ann muttered. \"It's the curse. Bad things are going to keep happening until we're all dead.\" She stroked the charm.\n\nIs it impolite to say that I liked her a lot more when she wasn't talking? At least she wasn't one of the rich kids. I didn't have to try and make it look like I was sabotaging her to keep Olivia and Gail off my back. Even if I did something really mild, it could send Ann over the edge. She was so freaked already.\n\nThe medic carefully checked George out. \"He looks good,\" she told Veronica. \"Maybe a little aspirin. Some ice for any sore spots.\"\n\n\"So I can stand up?\" George asked. He didn't wait for an answer. Just shoved himself to his feet with a grimace.\n\n\"That's all for today, everyone,\" Veronica announced. \"This competition is canceled.\"\n\n\"Unfair,\" James told her. \"George and I were clearly going to win.\"\n\nThere were all kinds of \"untrue's\" from pretty much everyone in response.\n\n\"The competition had just gotten started,\" Olivia protested. \"Just because you were slightly ahead\u2014\"\n\n\"Slightly! Did you say slightly?\" James interrupted.\n\n\"Why can't we\u2014\" Gail began.\n\n\"This is not up for debate,\" Veronica told us. \"The competition is over. We will have a new competition tomorrow.\"\n\n\"Can't we just start right where we were tomorrow? With a new trampoline?\" George asked. \"I'll be fine.\"\n\n\"Everything is not all about you, George,\" said Veronica. \"Although after reading your father's letter, I'm not surprised you think it is. The element of surprise was key to this competition. We can't regain that. There will be a new competition tomorrow. I have nothing more to say.\" She turned and walked inside the mansion.\n\nAs soon as she was gone, George faced off with James. \"This wasn't enough for you?\" he asked, touching the bruise on his jaw.\n\n\"What are you talking about?\" James demanded.\n\n\"There is no way that trampoline wasn't messed with,\" said George. He started to crouch down to inspect it, but his sister got there first.\n\n\"Definitely messed with,\" Georgina announced. \"The canvas is cut away from the springs. About every other one.\" She walked over to her brother and stood close to him. \"You know what? I'm starting to think there are people here who aren't happy they got handed some new competition this late in the show. First I get a bike with death brakes. Then you get the killer trampoline.\"\n\nGood theory. Except how could anyone know that George was going to end up on the trampoline? I didn't say anything. It seemed like one of those situations where listening was the best strategy.\n\n\"I'm satisfied with the spanking I gave you last night,\" James told George. \"If you think I care more about handing down a little more punishment to some rich kid than winning a million dollars, you're insane. I would never betray a teammate. Never.\"\n\nYou know what? I believed him. James is competitive to the nth degree. I couldn't see him doing anything to hurt his chances of winning, no matter how much he hated somebody.\n\n\"He couldn't have known that George would end up with the trampoline, anyway,\" Hal put in. \"And James couldn't have sabotaged it once George had brought it over to the mansion to start on the windows. George would have seen him.\"\n\n\"Thank you, Hal,\" said James.\n\n\"Not taking sides,\" Hal muttered, eyes on the ground. \"Just being logical.\"\n\nHis logic matched mine.\n\n\"So somebody sabotaged the trampoline without caring who would end up being the victim,\" Olivia said. The girl was all about strategy. She was good at putting herself in the mind of the perp. Because she was the perp? And trying to work some fake-out on the rest of us by bringing it up?\n\n\"It's the demon!\" Ann burst out.\n\n\"The cuts are pretty neat,\" Ripley observed. \"They don't look like they were made with huge, hideous claws.\"\n\n\"You people have to stop mocking! Is somebody going to have to die before you stop?\" Ann cried. She dashed into the house.\n\n\"Maybe freak girl snapped and did it herself,\" James said.\n\n\"She's not a freak,\" Brynn told him.\n\nJames raised one eyebrow. \"What would you call her?\"\n\nBrynn hesitated, then shrugged. \"What I'm saying is, everybody's afraid of something.\"\n\n\"You know what I'm afraid of?\" Ripley asked. We all looked at her, waiting. \"I'm afraid of what's going to happen at tomorrow's competition.\"\n\n\"Good afternoon, and welcome to the replacement competition,\" Veronica said to us the next day. She'd had us all gather in the dinning room.\n\n\"What's with the chef's hat?\" James called.\n\nVeronica adjusted the tall white hat she was wearing. It was an odd match with her pale blue suit and spike heels. Even I've absorbed enough about fashion to know that.\n\n\"If you had better manners, you'd already know,\" Veronica told him. \"I was about to explain, before you interrupted, that today's competition involves cooking skills.\"\n\n\"Are we still having teams?\" Olivia asked.\n\nVeronica let out a small sigh. \"Yes. Perhaps you and James should ask some of your other housemates to review what they learned in charm school. I'm sure some of them were sent,\" she answered.\n\n\"Same teams as last time?\" George wanted to know.\n\n\"Even if it seems that they learned nothing,\" Veronica added. \"Yes, same teams. No more interruptions, please. Or I will simply cancel today's competition as well and choose the next deprivation myself.\"\n\nThe room went silent.\n\nVeronica smiled. \"Today you will be making pies. And, as a special treat, you will be able to eat the pie you make. I know many of you have missed your desserts.\"\n\nNobody spoke. I think everybody was still afraid Veronica would take over choosing the deprivation. She chose a lot of them anyway. We didn't only get stuff taken away after a competition. But with a competition, there was a chance you'd win and get to pick something to lose that you didn't care about too much.\n\n\"You'll find everything you need\u2014or at least everything you may use\u2014out on the back lawn,\" Veronica concluded. \"Go!\"\n\nWe went, racing through the house and out the back doors onto the sloping lawn. There were six tables with pie-making ingredients laid out on them.\n\n\"Is there strawberry? I would kill for a strawberry pie!\" Ripley exclaimed. \"Not really, you guys! You know what I mean.\"\n\nI didn't care about flavor. I just wanted to get started. I dashed to the closest empty table. Apple. \"This okay?\" I asked Ann.\n\n\"I don't care.\" She'd added a second charm. Her face was pale, and there were dark smudges around her eyes.\n\n\"George, you know I love peach. Come on! Chose another table,\" I heard Georgina cry.\n\n\"Fine, fine. I'm not getting between you and your stomach,\" her brother answered. \"Then I would end up dead.\"\n\n\"Why is everyone joking about it?\" Ann's voice cracked as she asked the question.\n\n\"Because they're scared too,\" I told her. \"It's a different way of dealing. You want to find the recipe for apple pie in there?\" I nodded toward the cookbook. Then I realized there were no measuring cups, no mixing bowls, nothing to stir with, no baking pans.\n\n\"What are we\u2014? Are we supposed to use our hands or what?\" Olivia called out.\n\n\"Finally, an intelligent question.\" Veronica had followed us out to the lawn at a slower pace. \"I'm sure you're all familiar with the green movement. Around the corner, in the formal garden, you'll find a variety of materials that, if recycled creatively, should provide you everything you need.\"\n\n\"Can we use the ovens in the house?\" asked Georgina. I hadn't even thought about ovens.\n\n\"No,\" Veronica answered. Just no. With one of her Veronica smiles.\n\n\"Guess we'll have to build a fire,\" I told Ann. \"I can deal with that. I was a Boy Scout.\" And a current ATAC agent with wilderness survival training. \"But first we should grab supplies before all the good stuff is gone.\" I followed the group running for the garden.\n\n\"It looks like they moved a whole garbage dump over here,\" Brynn commented, staring at the mound of . . . who even knew what. Whatever it was didn't stink, so at least it was clean garbage.\n\nOlivia started climbing straight up the heap. \"I'll find stuff. You stand guard over the pile we make,\" she called to Joe. \"We can definitely use this!\" She picked up a glass goldfish bowl and hurled it at Joe. If it had hit him in the head . . . But he caught it.\n\nI realized I was just standing there, keeping an eye on little brother. He could take care of himself. And Frank Dooley wouldn't be worrying about Joe Carr. Frank Dooley would be worrying about winning.\n\nSo I began circling the pile. I didn't think climbing on it was the best strategy. I figured it would be best to spot useful stuff from the ground. I did an Ann check. She had an iron poker in one hand. Okay, might be good for stirring if we were desperate. Could help with the fire. She was all right. I hadn't been sure she was going to be able to keep it together, for the competition or anything else. But she seemed all right.\n\nI gathered up a couple of Frisbees and some foil. Combining them might make pie pans. They'd be better as pizza pans, but hey. I grabbed a plastic doll head that looked like it would hold just about eight ounces. So there was our measuring cup. I took a wooden bird, a wooden bat, and a wooden chair. That would be more than enough for fuel.\n\n\"I'm making a trip back to the table,\" Ann said. \"I've got as much as I can carry.\"\n\n\"Looks like you found a bowl-like object.\" She had a plastic football helmet under one arm. \"Want to take my measuring cup and start mixing? I want to find a couple more things, then I think we're good.\"\n\n\"Sure,\" Ann answered. I tossed her the doll head, and she actually almost smiled. I turned my attention back to the garbage heap.\n\n\"I call that ceiling fan,\" shouted James.\n\n\"You can't call. There's no calling!\" Ripley shouted back. She was closer to the fan and grabbed it.\n\n\"Okay, keep it. I call that wagon wheel.\" Ripley got there first too. She staggered under the wheel's weight as she hauled it out from under a Styrofoam reindeer.\n\nJames laughed as she started rolling it back toward the tables.\n\n\"You didn't want that, did you?\" George asked.\n\n\"Nope,\" James answered. \"Didn't want the fan, either.\"\n\n\"My partner,\" said George admiringly. They slapped a high five.\n\n\"See, I am a good guy to\u2014\"\n\nHe was interrupted by a shrill scream of agony.\n\n## Targeted\n\nA girl screamed again. The sound sent a bolt of electricity through my body. I half scrambled, half slid down the pile of junk and raced toward the tables. That was the direction the scream had come from.\n\nI rounded the corner of the mansion, Frank and a couple of the others right behind me. Immediately, I saw Georgina sitting on the ground with both hands pressed over her mouth. She rocked back and forth in pain.\n\n\"Milk!\" Ripley yelled from her spot at Georgina's side. \"Somebody go get her some milk! She's been poisoned. We need to dilute it.\"\n\n\"I'll get it.\" Brynn started for the house at a run.\n\n\"Wait,\" cried Gail. \"Different kinds of poisons need different treatments. We could end up hurting her. Just wait. The medic is going to be here in a second.\"\n\n\"What happened?\" I cried, skidding to a stop in front of them.\n\n\"The demon!\" Ann shouted. She stood at her own table, not taking a step closer to the rest of us. \"The demon did this.\"\n\n\"Georgina ate a piece of peach from her table and it burned her tongue,\" Ripley answered. \"Show them.\"\n\nGeorgina lowered her hands. She let out a whine as she opened her mouth. Think of the worst burn you've ever gotten from eating pizza when you're too hungry to let it cool enough. One of those hot, oily cheese burns that takes off a layer of skin. Then triple that.\n\nEven standing several feet away from her, I could see that Georgina's tongue looked like raw meat. Oozy and puffy.\n\n\"That definitely looks like a corrosive poison,\" I said. I wasn't sure Joe Carr would have that kind of knowledge. He was more the guy who could tell the price of a pair of sunglasses with one glance. But this was important. And Ripley, who was the most privileged of us privileged rich kids, obviously knew something about first aid. \"That means we definitely don't want to make her throw up.\"\n\n\"Yeah, I accidentally drank some toilet bowl cleaner once,\" George said, staring down at his sister. \"They said throwing up would wreck my throat.\"\n\n\"How do you accidentally drink toilet bowl cleaner?\" asked James.\n\n\"I was five. I liked the color. I guess I drank it on purpose. But I didn't, you know, drink poison on purpose,\" George answered.\n\n\"Here's the milk!\" Brynn called.\n\n\"Don't give it to her,\" I said. \"I think there are some poisons where you shouldn't give the person anything.\" Actually, I was positive. \"We don't know what she took. We've got to wait for the medic.\"\n\n\"I'm here,\" the medic called. \"Back up and give me some room.\"\n\nWe all backed up a little, but stayed close. Except Ann, I mean. She still hadn't moved closer to the group.\n\n\"What did you take?\" the medic asked Georgina.\n\n\"Noting,\" Georgina answered, her voice thick and distorted. \"Ust peach.\" She flapped her hand toward the table where she and Hal were going to make their pie.\n\nHold up. Hal. Had Hal poisoned the peaches? From what Frank told me, Gail and Olivia had leaned on Hal pretty hard. They'd pretty much told him that if he got a rich partner and didn't do what he had to do to make sure the rich kid lost, they'd hang him out to dry.\n\nSUSPECT PROFILE\n\nName: Hal Sheen\n\nHometown: Coshocton, Ohio\n\nPhysical description: 5'8\", 150 lbs., straight brown hair, brown eyes.\n\nOccupation: High school student\n\nBackground: Mensa member, statewide science fair winner three years in a row.\n\nSuspicious behavior: Was Georgina's partner when she was poisoned.\n\nSuspected of: Sabotaging contestants who aren't part of the alliance.\n\nPossible motive: Threatened by Olivia to do sabotage for good of the alliance.\n\n\"I want to get Georgina to a hospital ASAP,\" the medic told Veronica. \"I don't think she ingested much of the substance. The abrasions don't continue deep into her throat.\"\n\n\"Pit it ou,\" Georgina said.\n\n\"She spit it out,\" George translated for his sister.\n\n\"Even so,\" said the medic. \"I don't want to take any chances.\"\n\n\"I've already called an ambulance,\" Veronica announced.\n\nAn ambulance. Again. Bobby T had needed an ambulance before he'd been booted from the show.\n\nAt least he'd come back alive. We'd had a couple of people, both crew members, leave Deprivation House in silent ambulances. No sirens because there was no rush. The patients inside were already dead.\n\nToday's ambulance ride wouldn't be one of those. But that didn't mean we'd had our last.\n\n\"What have we got?\" Frank asked. We were back in our \"office\" late that night. I'd managed to call toilet seat again. Yes! The edge of the bathtub is hard. And cold.\n\n\"We've got a poisoning, the sabotage of a trampoline, sabotaged brakes, a drawing of a demon, and a partridge in a pear tree.\" I sang that last part. Frank didn't even smile.\n\n\"All that since Mary was removed from the house.\" Frank shook his head.\n\n\"And the perps keep on comin',\" I said.\n\n\"Do we think this is the work of one person?\" Frank asked.\n\n\"Usually I'd say it would be really unlikely that more than one person in our little community had turned homicidal,\" I answered. \"But since we've already had to oust two wackos . . . Who's to say there's only one more?\"\n\n\"Hal seems like a possibility,\" said Frank.\n\n\"I was thinking the same thing. Do you think he would have gone that far to keep Olivia and Gail happy?\" I replied.\n\n\"They basically made it a choice between keeping them happy and losing the chance to split the million dollars with them,\" Frank mused. \"Hal really wants start-up money for his game.\"\n\n\"Poison, though. He could have done something a lot less hard-core, right?\" I asked. \"I mean, Olivia threw a goldfish bowl at my head and tried to help me out of the top of a tree. He could have done something medium-core like that.\"\n\n\"I agree,\" Frank answered. \"He's a possibility, but not top of the list, I don't think. Also, if he is behind the poisoning, then we definitely have two people at work. There would be no reason for Hal to seriously hurt George. That wasn't anything Olivia and Gail were expecting from him.\"\n\n\"No reason for him to have sabotaged Georgina the first time either. Olivia and Gail hadn't threatened him yet.\" A new thought hit me. \"Or else Hal's a lot more sly than we're giving him credit for. Maybe he wanted to take some of the competition out all along. Maybe he was working on it before Olivia and Gail even brought it up. Maybe he damaged the dirt bike's brakes, and tried to poison Georgina, and messed up George's trampoline.\"\n\n\"Why not just admit he sabotaged the brakes when Olivia brought up sabotage?\" asked Frank.\n\n\"Maybe he didn't want to give them any info to use against him. Maybe he's planning on playing the alliance somehow,\" I suggested. \"Maybe he even did the demon drawing. He's always carrying around a sketch pad, and the practice handwriting you found was on sketch paper.\"\n\n\"But Gail and Olivia were trying so hard to keep their sketch pad hidden from me. Why do that, if there was nothing to hide?\" Frank asked.\n\nI shrugged. \"Maybe they were trying to hide something else. Like . . . that they'd been drawing pictures of me! Yeah, they didn't want you to know that they think I'm the more handsome brother. They thought it would hurt so bad, since I'm already the rich one.\"\n\n\"Yeah, I'm sure that's it.\" Those were the words Frank said. But somehow they came out sounding like, Only in your delusional skull, my brother.\n\n\"I'm just saying that there's more than one reason to keep the sketch pad hidden. It doesn't mean they wrote the note or did the drawings,\" I clarified. \"So, we got Hal. Who else?\"\n\n\"James. The guy wants to win. We know that. He never lets anyone forget it,\" Frank answered.\n\n\"I think we'd need a two-perp scenario with James, too. Because I really don't believe he'd sabotage his teammate. Not that he cares about sportsmanship or anything like that. But, like you said, he wants to win,\" I said.\n\n\"Olivia and Gail are clearly good suspects. All the victims we've had since Mary left have been rich. Two attacks on Georgina, one on George. It was Brynn's teddy bear that got shredded, and maybe it was even supposed to be Brynn in the picture.\" Frank stood up. I could tell he wanted to do some pacing, but there wasn't space in the bathroom.\n\n\"I never even think of Brynn as being one of the rich kids,\" I said.\n\n\"I don't either. Olivia was saying stuff about her shoes. I guess they're expensive. I wouldn't know,\" Frank admitted.\n\n\"Don't look at me,\" I protested. \"I know my shades, yeah. And sneakers. But that's about it.\"\n\nFrank sat back down. \"So Olivia and Gail may be working together. Maybe either Olivia or Gail is working separately. Gotta say, Gail seems less likely. She seems to be a follower type.\"\n\n\"I'm with you. I think Olivia should be at the top of our list,\" I agreed. \"And we should be thinking about Ripley, too. She's been right there next to two of the accidents. Giving instructions on how to take care of Georgina. Checking George for spinal injuries. She wasn't right on the spot when Georgina crashed, but that would have been hard to accomplish. You and Georgina were flying. Ripley was near the back of the pack.\"\n\n\"Georgina. George. Georgina,\" Frank said slowly.\n\n\"It seems like their dad has kind of the ego,\" I commented. \"He basically named both his kids after himself.\"\n\n\"Georgina. George. Georgina,\" Frank said again.\n\n\"What about Ann? You were partnered with her. Has she snapped or what? Do you think she could\u2014\" I began.\n\n\"George thought maybe somebody was going after him and his sister because they were the new people,\" Frank interrupted. \"It is kind of strange that they've been targeted repeatedly.\"\n\nI tapped my head. Sometimes it helps me shake thoughts loose. Didn't work so much this time. \"None of the people we've talked about have a reason to focus on George or Georgina. Yeah, they're rich, and that makes Olivia and Gail insane. But there are other rich people around.\"\n\nI did another couple of taps. A thought came loose. \"And anyway, even though it seems like the G's were targeted, they couldn't have been.\"\n\n\"Why not?\" Frank asked.\n\n\"Because no one knew it was going to be George who ended up on the trampoline or Georgina who would end up with the peaches and the bad brakes,\" I explained.\n\nWe both sat in silence for a moment.\n\n\"You remember how you said you'd know how to kill me because I'm your brother?\" asked Frank.\n\n\"I don't think I said it exactly like that,\" I objected.\n\n\"Okay, but you said something like you'd make it look like an accident involving cleaning projects, because I like to clean and it wouldn't look suspicious,\" Frank went on.\n\n\"How did we go from talking about George and Georgina to talking about me and you?\" I asked.\n\n\"They're siblings, just like us,\" Frank answered.\n\n\"Not just like us. One of them is a girl,\" I said. \"Oh, well, maybe just like us.\"\n\nFrank rolled his eyes. \"What I mean is, you know the people you're related to really well.\"\n\nAnother thought came loose, and I didn't even have to tap my head. \"Like that your sister loves peaches. And the color purple. There was only one purple dirt bike, and she went right for it.\"\n\n\"Georgina would know what her brother loves too. Like trampolines,\" Frank added.\n\n\"When I was clinging to the tree like a scared monkey in the challenge yesterday, I heard Georgina yell for Hal to get the trampoline so George couldn't. I thought she was being stupid, because George was closer to the tramp than she or Hal was\u2014and she'd basically just pointed it out to him,\" I said. \"What if that's what she was trying to do?\"\n\n\"George led Georgina to the peach table in a way. He got there first. I heard Georgina begging him to choose another table because he knew she loved peach,\" Frank told me.\n\n\"So that places him near the dish of peach slices. He had the opportunity to poison them,\" I answered.\n\n\"And George even said he drank toilet bowl cleaner when he was little,\" Frank reminded me. \"He probably wasn't trying to kill Georgina, just take her out of the competition. They both want to get legally emancipated. Only one of them can win the money. . . .\"\n\n\"They've made it clear they aren't sharing,\" I added. \"I think we need to do an evidence sweep. I call heads.\"\n\n\"What are we calling for?\" asked Frank.\n\n\"Heads, I get to search George's stuff,\" I explained.\n\n\"Which means the loser has to search Georgina's,\" Frank said. \"Which means sneaking into one of the girls' bedrooms in the middle of the night.\"\n\nIt's probably a good thing I lost. If Frank had to sneak into a bedroom full of sleeping girls, he might lose his lunch. And the hurling sounds would wake them all up.\n\nI had a few butterflies myself as I softly swung open the door to Brynn, Olivia, and Georgina's room. It wasn't so bad I felt like I was going to puke them up, though.\n\nIf the cameras are on, this will probably be on the show, I thought. Won't Mom and Aunt Trudy be proud? I guessed I could tell them it was all part of the socioeconomic experiment. Frank and I'd given this story about how we were going to use being on the show as a project for school. It was the best explanation for why we'd be on TV with different names, pretending to be from different families. I guessed as part of the experiment one of us would have to like going through girls' personal belongings while they were asleep.\n\nI dropped to my knees and crawled into the room. I doubted any of the girls were awake, but this way I'd be harder to spot, just in case. I crept over to Georgina's bed and slowly pulled opened the bottom drawer of her dresser. It would be stupid of her to leave any evidence in there. But it's not like Georgina was a professional.\n\nClothes. Of the underwear kind. That's all I've got to say about it. I searched, trying not to touch anything.\n\nNo evidence.\n\nNext drawer. More clothes. Safe to touch.\n\nNo evidence.\n\nI was out of drawers. I should check the pockets of whatever clothes she had hanging in the closet. But first, I slid the suitcase out from under her bed. Not quite empty. I felt something shift inside.\n\nThe zipper sounded as loud as machine-gun fire as I slid it open. I paused and listened. All I heard was breathing and a little snoring from somebody. Good. No one had woken up.\n\nI lifted the lid of the case. A Teen World magazine. Oooh, forbidden. We'd already been deprived of all reading material. And that was it.\n\nNo evidence.\n\nI started to slide the suitcase back under the bed.\n\n\"Don't,\" a girl muttered.\n\nI froze.\n\n\"Please, don't. Don't hurt me. Please.\"\n\nI recognized the voice.\n\n\"Brynn, it's me, Joe,\" I said softly. \"I'm not going to hurt you. It's just . . . a stupid prank the other guys and I came up with.\"\n\n\"Don't!\" Brynn cried, her voice higher.\n\n\"I'll get out right now.\" I stood up. \"I'm going. See?\" I scanned the beds until I found Brynn.\n\nShe was asleep. She's having a nightmare, I realized. I also realized my heart was beating like somebody was using it as a bongo. Hard and fast.\n\n\"Please,\" Brynn said again. Then she rolled over on her side and went silent.\n\nAnn wasn't the only one who'd gotten freaked by what had been happening in the house. Clearly Brynn had too. Who was I kidding? The house was giving me the wiggins. The only one it wasn't bothering was the person\u2014or people\u2014behind all the badness.\n\nAnd that's why I was in here. To get some evidence about exactly what was really going on in Deprivation House.\n\nI crouched down and did another check under the bed. Other than the suitcase, the only thing I spotted was a pair of sneakers. Well, I wasn't necessarily looking for something big.\n\nI had to get down on my stomach and stretch my arm out until I practically dislocated my shoulder, but I was able to get the shoes without waking up Georgina. Right shoe.\n\nNo evidence.\n\nLeft shoe.\n\nSomething. Something smooth and cool. I slid it free. Did you know they make pink Swiss Army knives? Because that's what it was. I began opening the blades. The first one was rough all down one side, and not very sharp.\n\nIt took me a second to get it. Because of the Y chromosome. It was a nail file. The next blade was regulation. I cautiously ran one finger down the flat side\u2014and picked up a thread.\n\nI bagged it, put the Swiss Army knife back where I found it, and crawled out of the room. Frank was waiting for me in the hall. \"Let's go to the bathroom,\" he said.\n\nI could tell from his face that he'd found something. \"Look at this,\" he told me as soon as the bathroom door was safely closed behind us.\n\nIt was a baster from the kitchen. \"Smell it,\" Frank urged.\n\nI pulled off the squeeze top and sniffed. Something harsh and chemical. Something I suspected was the corrosive poison that had burned Georgina's tongue.\n\n\"I got something too. Off the blade of a knife I found in one of Georgina's shoes.\" I handed the small plastic bag to Frank.\n\n\"Looks like a piece of canvas thread,\" he commented. \"Think it'll match the trampoline?\"\n\n\"Yeah,\" I answered. \"Think Veronica will care that her contestants are trying to kill each other?\"\n\n## Twisted Twins\n\n\"What am I to do about these?\" Veronica tapped one crimson fingernail on her desk. The desk where the baster and the plastic bag lay.\n\nJoe and I exchanged a glance. Wasn't it obvious what she was to do? Hand George and Georgina over to the police. Immediately.\n\n\"I wasn't trying to hurt Georgina,\" said George.\n\n\"That's true,\" Georgina jumped in. \"George drank a mouthful of the same stuff, almost. His was toilet cleaner. He gave me drain cleaner. But he knew I'd be okay. And the dirt bike\u2014I ride hard. I'm always taking spills. Wiping out isn't anything.\"\n\n\"It's like how Georgina knows I've taken falls off a trampoline before,\" George added quickly. \"She probably just thought I'd break a leg or something. Worst case.\"\n\nGeorgina nodded hard. \"And he's always breaking stuff. He's already broken his arm twice snowboarding.\"\n\nThis was bizarre. Suddenly the two of them were a team.\n\n\"So you're admitting it?\" Veronica asked.\n\nBoth George and Georgina's mouths dropped open. It's like neither of them had realized they had an option. Lying, for example. Something like, \"I have no idea how that (fill in the blank) got in my (fill in the blank). Someone must have put it there.\"\n\n\"I\u2014\" George began.\n\n\"We\u2014\" Georgina started.\n\n\"So you're admitting it.\" Veronica cut them off. It wasn't a question this time.\n\n\"But I won't press charges!\" Georgina exclaimed triumphantly. \"And neither will George. So there's nothing you can do to us.\"\n\nGeorge grinned. \"I would never press charges against my twin.\"\n\nVeronica shook her head. \"Again, I'm staggered by the knowledge a private school education provides.\"\n\n\"Yeah. So do we get to stay on the show? Since we aren't prosecuting each other?\" George asked.\n\n\"If this gets out\u2014and I am certainly strongly considering leaking it to the police at the earliest opportunity\u2014it will be the district attorney who decides whether or not you will be prosecuted. And with this evidence\"\u2014again Veronica's nail tapped her desk\u2014\"I'm certain you both would be.\"\n\n\"Do you want money?\" asked Georgina. \"Call our dad. He'll give you whatever you want.\" She looked over at me and Joe. \"You guys too. This was no big. Just me and George messing around.\"\n\n\"You know what I think this is?\" Veronica said. \"I think this is truly compelling television, which means you'll both be allowed to stay at the house.\"\n\n\"That's it?\" I protested.\n\n\"That's it,\" Veronica answered. \"I appreciate you boys bringing this to my attention. And I assure you, if anything like this happens again, I will personally take George and Georgina directly to the police.\"\n\nShe flicked her hands at us. Clearly, we were dismissed.\n\n\"I can't believe she didn't throw you out of here!\" James yelled at George and Georgina as soon as we stepped out of Veronica's office. \"If I had done that, I'd be in jail already.\"\n\nThe whole group was gathered in the hall. Staring at the twins.\n\n\"You did the drawing, too, didn't you?\" Brynn demanded. \"The one of the demon? And mutilated my teddy bear?\"\n\n\"No way!\" exclaimed George. \"Georgina's the only person I wasn't sure I could beat.\"\n\n\"Yeah, I wanted to get George out of the running. I'm not worried about you guys,\" Georgina added.\n\nOne of the production assistants hurried up to the twins. \"Veronica wants both of you to have a session in the Deprivation Chamber. She wants to get all your thoughts and feelings on tape\u2014the two of you together.\"\n\n\"I'm next in line,\" James said as the three of them hurried away. \"I have some things I want recorded too.\"\n\n\"How did you guys find out what happened so fast?\" Joe asked.\n\nExactly what I was wondering. Joe and I had gone straight to Veronica in the morning, and she'd pulled the twins into her office while we were sitting there. No one had had time to talk to the rest of the group.\n\n\"Oh, you'll love this,\" Brynn answered. \"They put the plasma back and told us we were getting a special treat. We were being allowed to watch TV! And what comes on? Closed circuit of you and the psychos in Veronica's office. Of course, the camera crew was right in our faces. They wanted to get some good close-ups of our reactions.\"\n\n\"It really was truly compelling television,\" Olivia snarked.\n\n\"I think we should be asking you two how you found out what was going on with the twins so fast,\" James commented. He looked back and forth between me and Joe. \"You guys fingered Mitch, too. You knew what was going on with him before the rest of us. What I want to know is how.\"\n\nOlivia's eyes narrowed. \"James is right\u2014for once. There's something off here. You two didn't even know each other before you got to the house. How come you keep teaming up? Have you made some kind of deal? Are you teaming up to win or what?\"\n\nOlivia had alliances on the brain.\n\nJoe laughed. I have to admit, he does a good fake laugh. Mine always sounds a little . . . fake.\n\n\"Me team up with him? The guy hates me, just because I ended up with a family who has bucks. All that garbage Mitch pulled? I thought my brother over there was behind it. I started watching him. It turned out he was just as suspicious of me.\"\n\n\"Yeah. I was keeping an eye on you. I didn't like you,\" I said to Joe. \"I still don't, just for the record.\"\n\n\"Anyway, we were both watching each other, and we ended up catching Mitch,\" Joe explained. \"Then when more bad stuff started going down, I figured he\"\u2014Joe jerked his head toward me\u2014\"could probably help me figure out who was behind it. He was decent at it the last time.\"\n\n\"We decided to work together\u2014just on finding out who was pulling the sabotage,\" I said. I turned to James. \"Happy now?\"\n\n\"Whatever,\" James muttered.\n\n\"Nice attitude,\" I said.\n\n\"I'm going to go get breakfast,\" Olivia announced. \"I get headaches if I don't eat, and I want to be ready for whatever Miss Veronica decides to throw at us next.\"\n\nThe rest of us followed her into the dining room. The cereal bowls and silverware had already been set out by the morning's assigned cooking crew. Not that there was much actual cooking going on anymore, since we no longer had hot food privileges.\n\nBrynn, Gail, and Hal brought in the boxes of cereal and the milk, and all they had left to do was handle the dishes. Olivia, Ann, and I were scheduled to make lunch. It would take about ten minutes to slap peanut butter and jelly sandwiches together for everyone.\n\n\"Those two really should have gotten kicked out. Who cares that they only tried to hurt each other? They cheated!\" Ripley exclaimed as she shook some cereal into her bowl.\n\n\"Hang on. I thought you cared about everybody, princess,\" said James. His bowl was already full. You had to be fast to get food before that guy. \"Isn't that your new PR image?\" He grabbed the milk.\n\n\"Being nice doesn't mean you have to like everybody or that you're an idiot,\" Ripley exclaimed. \"Are you saying I'm being mean to feel like cheaters should be thrown out of the game?\"\n\n\"You're not in it to win it anyway, right?\" Olivia asked. \"You don't need the money. You have multiple millions, even though people are starving. And not just in other countries. Right here\u2014\"\n\n\"I get it. You hate me because I'm rich. You hate everybody who's rich. But obviously you want to be rich yourself, or you wouldn't be here trying to win a million dollars,\" Ripley snapped. I noticed a muscle in her neck twitch. Then she forced a smile in Olivia's general direction. \"But everyone is entitled to their own opinion, right?\"\n\n\"Right,\" said Hal softly.\n\nI wondered if he was thinking about his opinion that sabotage was unacceptable.\n\n\"I think we should ice them out. Not deal with them at all. They can cook for themselves, talk to themselves. I don't want to even look at either one of them,\" Gail said, taking the subject back to George and Georgina.\n\n\"What they do doesn't matter to me\u2014as long as they keep doing it to each other,\" Brynn commented.\n\n\"But they've already done stuff to you,\" Olivia reminded Brynn. \"That drawing of you with the monster. The teddy bear massacre.\"\n\n\"They said they didn't do that,\" Brynn told her.\n\n\"And you believed them?\" exclaimed Olivia.\n\n\"George admitted he poisoned his sister and sabotaged her brakes,\" Brynn said. \"Georgina admitted she did something that could have paralyzed her brother for life. I think if they'd gutted a stuffed animal, they would have confessed.\"\n\n\"Then who did do that other stuff?\" asked Gail.\n\nWas she putting on an act? Or had she and Olivia really been acting so weird about the sketchbook for some reason that had nothing to do with the investigation?\n\n\"The demon! It was the demon!\" Ann shouted. She jumped to her feet so fast she knocked over her chair. \"Every time one of you doubts its existence, it does something worse!\"\n\nI didn't bother asking her why a demon would use crayon drawings and words on a wall to scare people when it was a demon. Logic wouldn't work on Ann. I'd finally accepted that.\n\n\"Whoever did it\u2014including the demon,\" Olivia added when Ann gave her a death look, \"was doing stuff before the twins even got here. Mary said she didn't put glass in the ice.\"\n\n\"Whatever. I'm not worried about\u2014\" James began.\n\nAnn pointed her finger at him. \"Don't say it!\" Her whole arm trembled.\n\n\"Demons,\" James mumbled into his cereal bowl as he lifted it to drain the milk at the bottom.\n\n\"What's that?\" asked Hal.\n\n\"What's what?\" James answered.\n\n\"There's something stuck to the bottom of your bowl,\" Hal told him.\n\nJames felt around, then pulled a piece of paper off the bowl. He stared at it for a couple of seconds, then slapped it down in the middle of the table so we could all see it.\n\nEVERYONE DIES AT DEATH HOUSE. The words were written in the same childlike handwriting as the message on the Deprivation Chamber wall and the piece of paper I'd found on the floor of the billiard room\u2014the one that read HOUSE OF DEATH.\n\n\"That wasn't there when we set the table,\" Gail said.\n\n\"You looked at the bottom of each bowl?\" Joe asked.\n\nGail frowned. \"No,\" she admitted.\n\n\"I took the bowls out of the dish drainer,\" Hal told the group. \"I would have seen the note then if it was there. The bowls were drying bottoms up.\" He stood. \"I'm using the intercom to get Veronica.\"\n\n\"You're dropping out?\" James asked. \"Sweet.\"\n\n\"No. But I want to see the film of the kitchen and the dining room. From when I took the dishes out of the drainer until right now,\" Hal said.\n\n\"I want to see it too,\" Gail agreed.\n\n\"I'm going.\" Hal strode out of the room.\n\nI studied the faces of everyone around the table, trying to decide if anyone looked nervous. Like they were about to be exposed. The thing was, everyone did look kind of nervous. Joe did. I probably did too. Nervous was getting to be the usual state for everyone in the house. Brynn was so pale even her lips had mostly drained of color. She had her eyes locked on the note.\n\n\"Hey, Ann, you'd know the answer to this. Can you see demons on film?\" James asked. \"Or are they like vampires?\"\n\nAnn let out a shriek of rage and hurtled out of the room.\n\n\"Just leave her alone, all right?\" Joe said.\n\n\"No. It's not all right,\" James answered. \"I don't like being told what to do by you.\"\n\nIt looked like another fight might be about to start up, but Hal interrupted by walking back into the dining room, followed by George and Georgina.\n\n\"Well?\" Olivia asked.\n\n\"She said they weren't taping,\" Hal answered. \"It was part of the off hours.\"\n\n\"Uh-uh. No way.\" Ripley shook her head. \"Veronica would have to know we'd be talking about those two.\" She jerked her chin toward George and Georgina. \"She'd want to get all that on film.\"\n\n\"Yeah. Why would she choose now to kill the cameras?\" Joe asked. \"There's plenty of time when we're all sitting around staring at the walls. I watch a ton of reality shows. They never leave out the part where the whole group is hating on a few people.\"\n\n\"You were bad-mouthing us?\" George demanded.\n\n\"Ya think?\" asked Gail.\n\n\"This proves Veronica and the producers did the drawing and the notes. Has to be,\" Olivia said. \"That's why she said there was no film. The film would have shown a PA sticking that piece of paper on the cereal bowl. I'm positive. They're using the scary history of the house as part of the show.\"\n\n\"Half the time they lie to people about what the reality show they're on really is,\" Joe added. \"Maybe we're in Demon House, not Deprivation House.\"\n\n\"If that's true, I'm suing. I'll get more than a million,\" said James. \"Brynn, hand me the rice puffs. I'm ready for seconds.\"\n\n\"I guess it does make sense that Veronica is behind the drawing and note,\" Hal commented. \"It's way too coincidental that they weren't filming at the exact time when we knew something had happened.\"\n\n\"Brynn! Cereal!\" James commanded.\n\nI looked over at her. She was still staring at the note. I leaned across Gail, took the cereal box that was in front of Brynn, and handed it to James. \"Hey, want to go outside, Brynn? Are you finished?\" I asked.\n\nShe blinked a couple of times but didn't answer.\n\nGail touched her arm, and Brynn gave a jerk. \"Frank asked you something,\" Gail said. \"And James issued an order, which you were right to ignore.\"\n\nBrynn turned to me. \"Sorry. What did you say?\"\n\n\"I was just thinking if you're finished we could take a walk or something,\" I told her.\n\n\"Awww,\" James cooed.\n\n\"Sure.\" Brynn grabbed her light blue jacket off the back of her chair and hurried out of the room. I followed her. We ended up sitting next to the fountain in the courtyard.\n\n\"Getting intense, huh?\" I asked.\n\n\"Yeah.\" Her voice was flat, her eyes glassy.\n\n\"Should we make this a no demon, no murder zone?\" I suggested. \"No talking about any house stuff.\"\n\nBrynn nodded.\n\nI wanted to tell her right then how I felt about her. I'd been wanting to for a while. But the time never seemed right. And it still didn't. Brynn needed to chill. She was seriously stressed.\n\nShe pulled off her shoes and socks and stuck her feet in the fountain. \"Get yours in here!\"\n\n\"It's not exactly hot out,\" I said. \"You're wearing your jacket.\" The light blue material made her hair look even blonder.\n\n\"That's the price of hanging with me. Feet in or walk your feet somewhere else.\"\n\nI got my shoes and socks off fast, sat down next to her on the edge of the fountain, and plopped my feet into the water. Brynn kicked up and gave me a little splash. \"I love this. This was my favorite place.\"\n\n\"What?\" I asked.\n\n\"Oh, I was just remembering this park. When I was little I used to go there with my mom. It had a big fountain like this. It was my favorite place,\" Brynn explained. \"We used to splash around in it.\"\n\nHer mood seemed to have completely turned around. Getting outside away from everybody for a while had been a good idea.\n\nBrynn reached down into the fountain and flicked some water at me. Some of it landed in her blond hair and sparkled in the sun. Maybe this was the right time. Maybe I should tell Brynn everything I was feeling about her. . . .\n\nYeah, she's been feeling better for a whole minute, I thought. I decided not to say anything. Instead I splashed her back.\n\nI woke up before daybreak the next morning and couldn't go back to sleep. I kept thinking about Brynn. My mind kept jumping back and forth between fun thoughts, like hanging out with her at the fountain, and worries. Was Brynn being specifically targeted by whoever had done that drawing and ripped up her bear?\n\nIt's not like the crayon drawing had really looked like her. The blond hair reminded me\u2014and clearly Olivia\u2014of Brynn. But George had thought it looked as much like his sister. And really, it was pretty generic.\n\nI rolled over on my side and told myself to take some deep breaths and let myself drift back off. Sleep's important for a sharp mind, and I was going to need one to figure out the rest of the case with Joe.\n\nHow many people knew that bear was Brynn's?\n\nThe deep breathing didn't work. I definitely wasn't going to fall back to sleep. A run. That's what I needed. Sometimes a change of scene will give me new ideas. New angles to investigate.\n\nI got dressed fast and headed out of my room. As I started down the main staircase, I heard footsteps behind me. I didn't think anybody else was up. I jerked my head around\u2014and saw Joe. Wearing sneakers and sweats.\n\n\"Run?\" he asked.\n\nI nodded.\n\n\"Think Olivia and Gail will try to off you if you're seen with me?\" Joe said. \"We said we only teamed up to find the saboteur. We're not supposed to like hanging out together or anything.\"\n\n\"I'll just tell them I was trying to find a way to off you while we were jogging,\" I answered.\n\n\"Gotta say, I'm glad you're my brother and not George,\" Joe told me as we headed outside.\n\n\"Aww, that's so sweet. You prefer me to a deranged attempted murderer.\" I started to run. Joe matched me step for step. Neither of us likes to come in last.\n\n\"I couldn't sleep,\" said Joe. \"I kept thinking about the notes and the drawing and the teddy bear incident. I actually believed the Twisted Twins when they said they didn't do that stuff.\"\n\n\"Me too. You go with the group theory that the producers are behind everything that plays on the history of the house? The old murder and the demon story?\" I asked.\n\n\"Makes sense. Hal was right about the timing. It's a big coincidence that they weren't filming during the time we know that last note was put in place,\" Joe answered.\n\nWe left the path and entered the orchard. A few beams of light were just starting to filter through the trees. \"Would that mean it was the producers who sent everybody the death threats to begin with? To get everybody scared before we even showed up?\"\n\n\"We were thinking Mary had done that,\" Joe reminded me. \"But since she's probably in a juvenile detention somewhere and the demon is still playing with us, I guess not. Maybe the\u2014\"\n\nJoe grabbed my arm and yanked me to a sudden stop.\n\n\"What?\" I demanded.\n\n\"Over there,\" he said, his voice coming out choked.\n\nThen I saw what Joe had seen.\n\nBrynn lying facedown in the dirt. Her light blue jacket red with blood. So much blood.\n\n## So Much Blood\n\n\"Brynn!\" Frank shouted. I've never heard that much fear and pain in my brother's voice. Never.\n\nWe both tore over to the body. There was no way she could be alive\u2014was there? Not with so much blood.\n\n\"She's been stabbed,\" Frank cried as he dropped to his knees next to Brynn.\n\nHe gently laid his fingers against Brynn's neck. Her head shifted, turning sideways. He let out a long breath.\n\nIt wasn't Brynn. It was Georgina. They had that same blond hair, and Georgina must have borrowed Brynn's jacket.\n\n\"She's alive,\" Frank said. \"Her pulse is thready, but she's alive. I need to get a pressure bandage on her.\"\n\n\"You stay with Georgina,\" I told Frank. \"I'll run back to the house and get the medic and call an ambulance.\" I turned and dashed off. \"Cell phones,\" I muttered, thinking of the seconds ticking by, seconds that could save Georgina's life. \"They had to take away our cell phones.\"\n\n\"Georgina's been stabbed!\" I shouted as I pounded back into the mansion. My eyes darted back and forth as I searched for a PA. \"I need somebody with phone access! We need an ambulance!\"\n\nPeople appeared from all directions. The stairs. The kitchen. The dining room. The front door.\n\n\"What happened?\" Olivia cried.\n\n\"I don't know. All I know is she's lost a lot of blood and she needs help\u2014now!\" I answered.\n\n\"Veronica's on her way down. I'm calling an ambulance. We're tracking down the medic,\" a PA wearing a headset told us. \"Where exactly is Georgina?\"\n\n\"She's in the orchard. Back in the northeast corner. Frank's with her,\" I answered.\n\n\"Stabbed? As in stabbed?\" asked James.\n\n\"As in clawed with demon claws.\" Ann clutched her charm, snapping more of the twigs.\n\nVeronica strode into the large entryway. \"Where's George?\" she demanded.\n\nI looked around. I hadn't even taken in the fact that he wasn't with the others. Get in ATAC mode, I told myself. I locked down everything I was feeling about what I'd just seen. I needed to be on full alert. Cool and logical and ready for whatever went down.\n\n\"I think he's in the shower,\" Hal said.\n\n\"I want him out and down here,\" Veronica ordered the PA, who began talking rapidly into her headset.\n\nBrynn sat down on the floor. She pulled her long robe tighter around her, like she was freezing.\n\n\"I want to drop out,\" Gail blurted. \"I want to go home. I want to go home now.\"\n\n\"Fine.\" Veronica nodded at the PA.\n\n\"You should all go,\" Gail told us, voice trembling. \"It isn't safe here. You all know it. If you stay, you're all going to die! No amount of money is worth that.\"\n\n\"I'm not dying. I might kill somebody myself, but I'm not dying,\" James declared. He hitched up the cut-off sweats he slept in.\n\n\"I'm staying,\" Ripley said. \"I've gotten this far.\"\n\n\"I'm certainly not leaving.\" Olivia crossed her arms over her chest.\n\nHal shifted from foot to foot. \"I disagree that we're in danger. George is the one who\u2014\"\n\n\"Noooo!\" The howl carried all the way from the second floor to the entryway. Footsteps pounded toward us, and George appeared at the top of the stairs, two PAs behind him.\n\nHe scrambled down the stairs. Barefoot. Shirtless. Dripping water. \"Where is she? I want to see Georgina!\" he shouted.\n\n\"Georgina is or will shortly be on her way to the hospital,\" Veronica told him. \"And you will shortly be on your way to the police station.\"\n\n\"Is she okay? Is she going to be okay?\" George demanded. He lunged toward Veronica, and the PAs grabbed him and jerked him back. \"I want to go to the hospital with her. She'd want me to.\"\n\n\"I don't think having her attempted killer at her bedside would help your sister in her fight for her life,\" Veronica told him.\n\n\"You think I did it?\" It was like it had never occurred to him. Even though Veronica had already pretty much told him the cops were coming for him.\n\n\"Ask Georgina. She'll tell you. I'd never hurt her!\" George ran his hands through his wet hair.\n\n\"You tried to poison her yesterday, dude!\" James exploded.\n\n\"I wasn't trying to kill her!\" George shouted. \"Just ask Georgina. Or let me talk to her.\"\n\n\"Georgina has lost a great deal of blood,\" Veronica told him. \"She's in critical condition. She isn't able to speak to anyone.\"\n\n\"Critical condition? Like she could die?\" asked George, all the color draining out of his face.\n\n\"You stabbed her. What do you think?\" James shot back.\n\nGeorge's shoulders started to shake. It took me a second to realize he was crying. Sobbing. \"I would never do anything to hurt Georgina,\" he choked out.\n\n\"You should have seen George's face,\" I told Frank late that night. It was the first time we'd gotten the chance to talk by ourselves. By the way, I had to sit on the edge of the tub this time. \"He'd completely lost it. Crying so hard he could hardly even breathe. The police could barely get him out to the cruiser.\"\n\n\"Man.\" Frank shook his head.\n\n\"I'm not sure he did it,\" I said.\n\n\"I'm not either,\" said Frank\n\n\"Not just because of the crying . . . ,\" I began.\n\n\"Lots of guilty people cry,\" Frank agreed. \"But there are still all these pieces that don't fit. I'd really like to know for sure whether the producers are behind the drawing, and the warning on the wall, and note and the bear, for one thing. It couldn't be George. He didn't have the opportunity to place the note on the cereal bowl.\"\n\n\"Right,\" I said. \"Which means if it's not the producers, the person who almost killed Georgina is still in the house.\"\n\n\"Let's go through the list again. Who've we got?\" Frank asked.\n\nBefore we could start reviewing the suspects, someone screamed.\n\nFrank was on his feet instantly. \"That sounded like Brynn!\"\n\n\"Maybe a nightmare,\" I said as we dashed toward her room. \"She was having one the other night.\"\n\nIt wasn't a nightmare. I knew that the instant I saw Brynn's face.\n\nFour deep claw marks cut across her right cheek. Dripping blood.\n\n## Killer Pool\n\n\"Who did it?\" I burst out.\n\nBrynn shook her head. \"I don't know. I was asleep. Then I felt this ripping across my cheek.\"\n\n\"You didn't see anything?\" Joe asked. \"Or maybe hear or even smell something?\"\n\nBrynn lightly touched the scratches, then winced. \"Nothing. I just . . . nothing.\"\n\n\"I didn't see anything either,\" said Olivia. She was the only roommate Brynn had left, with Georgina in the hospital.\n\nI couldn't stop staring at Brynn's face. How had this happened? How had I let it happen? Joe and I were here to keep the other contestants safe. Now Georgina was in the hospital and somebody had gone after Brynn.\n\nIt shouldn't have mattered that it was Brynn. I should have felt the same way if it was anyone who was supposed to be under my protection. I should have felt that way if it was James curled up on his bed, trembling, with bloody scratches on his face.\n\nAnyway, just standing there, looking at her, feeling completely useless, was making me insane. I wanted to do something. Take some kind of action.\n\nI hurried into the bathroom and wet a washcloth with warm water, then rushed back to Brynn's side. I used the cloth to wipe the blood off her cheek.\n\n\"Aww, so sweet,\" James said. Yeah, James was there. By the time I returned with the cloth, everybody in the group was there. No one could have slept through that terrible scream of Brynn's.\n\n\"The demon. It's getting stronger,\" said Ann, eyes dark and solemn. For once, she wasn't shouting. And it made her words seem less crazy and more frightening.\n\n\"Do you think there could actually be a demon?\" Ripley asked. \"Or maybe the house is haunted by Katrina Decter. She died here. Just two rooms over. Maybe we should ask Veronica to have somebody come in and, I don't know, do a psychic scrub-down of the place.\"\n\n\"Like an exorcism?\" Hal asked.\n\n\"Yeah,\" Ripley answered. \"That might help, right, Ann?\"\n\n\"What do you think?\" asked James. With no sarcasm. It seemed like pretty much everybody was willing to at least consider Ann's demon theory now.\n\nI noticed Brynn's hands had blood on them too. I took one of them in mine, then used the washcloth to clean her fingers. For a second, I was hit by the fact that I was pretty much holding hands with a girl\u2014a girl I liked\u2014in front of a roomful of people. And I wasn't blushing or anything.\n\nMaybe fear overrides embarrassment. And I was afraid, I admit it. Not of demons or ghosts. But just of the possibility that Brynn\u2014or one of the others\u2014could die. And that I might not be smart enough or fast enough to stop it.\n\n\"Exorcisms don't always work,\" Ann told the group. \"This demon is strong. You finally all see that.\"\n\nThis wasn't good. Things were bad enough at Deprivation House without the whole group getting as demon crazy as Ann. \"You know what I see?\" I asked loudly. Nobody asked, \"What?\" but I told them anyway. \"I see blood under Brynn's fingernails.\" I held her hand up so everyone could see. \"I'm sure there's tissue under there too.\"\n\n\"You must have really fought back hard,\" Hal said. He was good at making connections. I could see him with ATAC. Unless he was the one who'd been trying to kill people. ATAC has a problem with hiring murderers.\n\n\"That's my point,\" I explained. \"Brynn probably left her attacker with a couple of claw marks of her own. That's where the blood and tissue under her nails came from. It's ordinary blood and tissue from another human. Not some supernatural creature.\"\n\n\"You don't know what forms demons can take,\" Ann told me. \"You don't have any reason to think it couldn't look like an ordinary human.\"\n\n\"I saw one of the old movies Nina's father directed once. The demons did all look like ordinary humans. Well, really hot ordinary humans,\" said Ripley.\n\n\"I didn't know he directed horror movies. Maybe that's where he came up with the idea to tell Nina her mom was possessed by a demon in the first place,\" Joe suggested.\n\n\"Or maybe it's because it was true!\" Ann shot back. \"How much more proof do you want?\" She flung her hand out at Brynn. \"Look at her.\"\n\n\"But like Frank said, we have to consider that whoever attacked Brynn left ordinary blood behind,\" Hal commented.\n\nI glanced around the room. All our suspects were there, with the exception of Veronica. If one of them had attacked Brynn, they would be showing some marks too. The thing was, heat was one of our deprivations, and it got cold at night. That meant we all slept with a lot of clothes on. Everyone was wearing long pajama pants or sweats or long johns, with sweaters or sweatshirts or something else with sleeves on top. A few people\u2014Olivia, Ann, and Hal\u2014were even wearing gloves.\n\nAnybody could have some wounds from Brynn's nails. Which one of them did? I had no way of knowing.\n\n\"Are you looking at me for some reason?\" Joe demanded, glaring at James.\n\n\"What's your damage?\" James asked.\n\n\"I saw you look at me when my brother over there was talking about how Brynn must have left some marks on her attacker.\" Joe took a step closer to James. \"You think I did it?\"\n\n\"I think you'd do anything to win. And you know a lot about how sabotage is done. I noticed that when we teamed up,\" I said to Joe. I thought I knew where he was going with this. And I liked it.\n\n\"Of course you'd side with him,\" Joe yelled at me. \"You're completely prejudiced against rich people. Something bad happens, and you assume it's one of us.\"\n\n\"What? You think rich people are special?\" Olivia demanded. \"You think nobody rich would ever cheat? Or hurt somebody?\"\n\n\"I know you need money a lot more than I do, Olivia,\" Joe shot back. \"You too, James. If somebody's trying to take Brynn out of the running, I think it's a lot more likely that it's one of you.\"\n\n\"I don't need to take anybody out of the running,\" shouted James.\n\n\"Yeah? Brynn won the dirt bike race,\" Joe told him.\n\nJames yanked off his sweatshirt. He pulled his sweatpants up above his knees. Then he turned in a slow circle, arms stretched wide. \"Anybody see any blood?\" he demanded. \"Anybody see any scratches from Brynn's fingernails?\"\n\nJoe had done it. He'd goaded James into showing the skin I needed to see to eliminate him. He didn't have any wounds. He couldn't have been the person who attacked Brynn.\n\n\"Your turn,\" James told Joe.\n\n\"Fine.\" Joe pulled off his sweatshirt and shoved his pajama pants up.\n\n\"It's not him,\" said Hal.\n\n\"Well, it's not me,\" I answered. I did my own strip show.\n\n\"I want to see everybody,\" James declared. Hal sighed and started unbuttoning his pajama top.\n\n\"I'm not showing you anything,\" Ripley said.\n\n\"The girls will go into the bathroom and check each other,\" Olivia stated. She looked over at Ripley. \"Unless there's some reason you don't want to clear yourself.\"\n\n\"Fine.\" Ripley headed for the bathroom, followed by Olivia and Ann. I trusted them to come back with an accurate report. One good thing about all the suspicion and tension and rich-poor garbage in the group: With all the girls in the bathroom, they'd never be able to agree on some kind of cover-up.\n\n\"I'm voting for the crazy chick,\" James said after Hal had proved he had no scratches or blood on him.\n\n\"What about Ripley?\" Hal asked. \"Maybe she wanted another chance to give first aid. Maybe she's been hurting everyone for PR.\"\n\n\"I could see Ripley doing it too,\" James agreed. \"And Olivia would probably eat her own foot to win.\"\n\n\"How would that possibly help?\" Hal replied.\n\nJames ignored him. \"What about you?\" he asked me. \"Who do you want in the Killer Pool?\"\n\nI glanced over at Brynn. She had her arms wrapped tight around her knees. Like she was afraid somebody was going to assault her again. \"Let's just wait and see, okay?\" I answered James. Brynn didn't need to listen to us turning what happened to her into a game.\n\nI turned toward the door. Was the case going to be closed when the girls came back in? I could actually come up with a scenario where Ripley or Olivia attacked Brynn. They both had motives. Ripley, the good PR she'd get for coming to Brynn's aid. Olivia might have decided to take out some of the non-alliance competition.\n\nAs for Ann . . . I didn't have a motive that made sense for her. But she'd been almost hysterical for days. What was going on with her? She'd been so quiet in the beginning that Joe and I hadn't been able to get very much information out of her.\n\nI heard footsteps in the hall. Was this it? Were we about to have absolute proof of the attacker's identity?\n\nThe door swung open. Olivia was the first one through. \"We're all clean,\" she announced.\n\n\"I'm getting Veronica down here,\" I said.\n\n\"Oooh. He's calling the principal,\" James called.\n\nActually, I was calling the only suspect who hadn't been checked for wounds.\n\n\"Why drag her into it?\" asked Olivia. \"What if she decides to shut the show down?\"\n\n\"Maybe she should,\" I answered. I didn't care if that happened\u2014as long as Joe and I found the perp first. I didn't want anyone leaving the house until we had the case locked.\n\nI hurried out to the intercom in the hall\u2014and saw Veronica striding toward me. Clearly, she'd been alerted by a PA\u2014or had been watching the camera footage live.\n\n\"Did you get who attacked Brynn on film?\" I asked.\n\n\"We didn't start the cameras until the scream alerted us that something of interest was happening,\" Veronica replied.\n\nOf interest. She had to be made of ice.\n\nIf she was the one who had attacked Brynn, it was very convenient that there was nothing on film. That was one advantage Veronica had that none of the other suspects did. She knew when the cameras were live. She controlled them.\n\nVeronica walked past me and into Brynn's room. I rushed after her. She was as perfectly dressed and groomed as always, even this late at night. Her short lavender skirt showed a lot of her legs, but her suit jacket could be hiding the scratches Brynn had given her assailant. How were Joe and I supposed to get it off her?\n\nAn idea slammed into my head. I didn't know if it would work, but it was worth a try. I turned around and slipped back out of the room as the rest of the group pounded Veronica with questions.\n\nWhen I got downstairs to the kitchen, I went straight to the fridge and studied the contents. Grape juice, I decided. I poured a glass, filling it almost to the rim, then I returned to Brynn's room.\n\n\"I thought maybe you'd want something to drink,\" I told Brynn.\n\n\"Isn't he sweet?\" James asked.\n\nI started toward Brynn, making sure that I took a path that led me past Veronica. Then I \"tripped.\" A second later, grape juice was splattered all over her.\n\nVeronica let out a little shriek. \"That's going to stain,\" Joe told her. \"Give it to me and I'll run it to one of the PAs. They can do . . . whatever you're supposed to do to deal with grape juice.\"\n\nShe narrowed her eyes at him. \"You think you're very clever, don't you?\" She turned to me. \"Both of you.\"\n\nWhat was that supposed to mean? Did Veronica know our secret? Had she somehow managed to find out that we were ATAC?\n\n\"I know you were checking one another for wounds,\" she continued. \"Clearly you think I might be the one who assaulted Brynn. Which is ridiculous.\" She slid off her jacket. The T-shirt\u2014it probably has another name because it had lace on it\u2014underneath showed her arms and shoulders and throat. No scratches.\n\n\"Happy?\" she asked, still looking at me.\n\nI nodded.\n\n\"I'll be charging you for the dry cleaning,\" she said. \"Now, is there anything else?\"\n\n\"What are you going to do about the demon?\" Ann burst out.\n\n\"What are you going to do about what happened to Brynn?\" cried Ripley. \"Look what somebody did to her.\"\n\n\"Deprivation House is clearly bringing out the worst in one of you. At least one,\" Veronica answered. \"It certainly affected George, and, of course, we can't allow the kind of behavior he exhibited.\" She gave a small shrug. \"But a scratch isn't the same as a knife in the back. Any of you are welcome to leave now. Otherwise, I suggest you all start sleeping with your eyes open.\" She left the room without a backward glance.\n\n\"Hard-core,\" Joe muttered.\n\n\"I'm not going to be able to sleep at all,\" Brynn said. \"I'm going to go to the great room and stare at the place where the TV used to be.\"\n\n\"I'll go with you,\" I immediately offered.\n\n\"I'm going to see what's in the kitchen. Maybe there's some celery or something,\" said Joe. \"We haven't been deprived of vegetables yet, right?\"\n\nThe three of us headed out of the room. \"You guys want anything? See, I can be polite to the poor,\" Joe added to Brynn. I could tell he was setting up an opportunity for us to talk.\n\n\"Maybe I'll get us some non\u2013junk food,\" I told Brynn. She nodded. \"I'd rather get it myself. I don't think my brother would be that good at serving,\" I added.\n\n\"What?\" I said to Joe when she had disappeared into the great room. \"I don't want to leave her alone.\"\n\nJoe stepped close to me and lowered his voice. \"Remember how we thought it was Brynn at first\u2014in the orchard?\"\n\n\"Because Georgina was wearing Brynn's coat,\" I answered.\n\n\"And because they have the same hair,\" Joe said. \"I was thinking\u2014what if someone else made the same mistake we did? What if that knife wasn't meant for Georgina? What if it was meant for Brynn?\"\n\n\"And they went after her again tonight.\" My gut tightened just thinking about it.\n\n\"It's possible,\" Joe answered. \"Watch her, okay? And watch yourself.\"\n\nI nodded and walked into the great room. Brynn looked so small in the huge space. \"Nothing good?\" she asked.\n\nIt took me a minute to realize she was talking about food. \"Uh-uh,\" I answered. \"Are you hungry?\"\n\n\"No. I may never eat again. I'll have a lot of time for hobbies with the no eating or sleeping.\" Brynn was trying to joke around, but her voice was flat.\n\n\"So what are you going to start doing? Knitting? Field hockey? What?\" I asked. I figured the best thing I could do for her was try and take her mind off the attack.\n\n\"I'm thinking . . .\" Brynn's words trailed off. \"My brain is gone,\" she admitted. \"Can we just sit here? Just sit.\"\n\n\"Sure,\" I told her.\n\nThen Brynn reached over and held my hand. I wanted to tell her that I'd never felt this way before. That she was the most amazing girl I'd ever met. But that would involve talking. And she didn't want talking. So it wasn't the time. Was it ever going to be the time?\n\nWhoever attacked Brynn had to have been as close to her as I am right now. The thought sent a shiver through me.\n\nShe had to have screamed as soon as her face was clawed. If the attacker was so close, how did he or she get out of the room without Olivia seeing the person? If he or she was close\u2014and they had to be\u2014why hadn't Brynn even gotten a glimpse?\n\nBrynn squeezed my hand. I looked down at where our fingers were twined together. I could see the dried blood under her nails.\n\nAt least she'd caused her attacker some pain. But why hadn't there been a mark on any of the suspects? Who were Joe and I forgetting?\n\nAnd then it clicked. I got it. I knew who had attacked Brynn.\n\nWhat I didn't understand at all was why.\n\n## Why Would She Do That?\n\n\"It makes sense, right?\" Frank asked as he paced around the bathroom.\n\n\"Yeah. It's actually the only thing that makes sense,\" I told him. \"It explains everything. Why neither Brynn nor Olivia got even a fast look at the attacker. Why we didn't see a mark on any of the suspects.\"\n\n\"It's the only thing that make sense.\" Frank sighed as he sat down on the edge of the tub.\n\n\"Are you okay?\" I asked.\n\n\"Yeah. Why?\" he replied.\n\n\"Why?\" I repeated. \"You know why. Because you like her. You might even love her. I wouldn't blame you if you weren't okay now that we know Brynn is behind the attack.\"\n\n\"I just want to understand it,\" Frank said. \"And I don't. Not at all. Why would she do that to her own face?\"\n\n\"I don't get it either. But it explains the blood under her fingernails. It was her own blood,\" I answered. \"And nobody saw her attacker, because when Brynn screamed, there was no one in the room except Brynn and Olivia.\"\n\n\"What else do you think she did?\" asked Frank. \"Did she rip up her own bear, leave the notes, do the drawings? Did she . . .\"\n\nHe couldn't finish, so I had to. \"Did she do all the sabotage that's happened since Mary was taken out of the house? Did she stab Georgina?\"\n\nFrank grimaced. \"Yeah. Do you think she did?\"\n\n\"With this new info, anything seems possible,\" I admitted.\n\n\"I keep going back to the why,\" Frank said. \"I want to understand. . . .\"\n\n\"Okay, so what do we know about Brynn?\" I asked.\n\n\"She likes to read. She has expensive shoes. She likes ice cream with nothing in it. . . .\" Frank's voice trailed off. \"It's not much. And I've spent more time talking to her than any other suspect.\"\n\n\"Me too. And I don't have anything good either. She made up this game where you have to come up with the best opposite for something else. And the fountain is pretty much her favorite place here.\"\n\n\"Yeah. She told me there was a fountain like it in this park she went to with her mom,\" Frank said.\n\nThen his eyes narrowed, and I could almost see a thought ripping into his head. \"What?\" I asked.\n\n\"At first she said the fountain was her favorite place. Then she corrected herself and gave me the story about the park and her mom.\"\n\n\"Story?\" I repeated. \"You think it was a lie?\"\n\n\"What if\u2014and this is kind of a crazy theory\u2014but what if Brynn was here, at the mansion, when she was a little girl? What if it's true that the fountain here was really her favorite place as a kid?\" Frank asked.\n\n\"Meaning that Brynn is actually Nina?\" I thought for a second. \"She's the right age. Nina was four when her mother was killed. That was ten years ago. Brynn's fifteen.\"\n\n\"And she knew exactly where a light switch in the library was. It was so low, she shouldn't even have noticed it,\" said Frank. \"The library used to be Nina's room.\"\n\n\"So why is she here? With a fake name and everything?\" I'm usually pretty good at motives, but nothing about this was making sense.\n\n\"I get why she wouldn't want everyone to know she was Nina,\" Frank answered. \"But I don't know why she'd ever want to come back here. Every night we all hang out in the room where her mother was killed.\"\n\n\"Maybe that's why she's always going out to the balcony and looking down at the fountain,\" I suggested. \"Maybe she can't stand being in that room. But then we're back to the question of why she came here in the first place.\"\n\n\"To stop the show from getting on TV?\" Frank said. \"Maybe she thought the show would bring attention back to the murder, and she didn't want that. After ten years, it's not something anyone talks about much. But with the show, that could change.\"\n\n\"Do you think Brynn would stab someone to shut down the show? Are we saying that she tried to kill Georgina?\" The thought of Brynn doing that made my stomach do a slow roll. How must Frank be feeling? He was in love with her. And he's not like me. I fall half in love with half the girls I see. Frank's not that way.\n\n\"I hope not,\" Frank admitted. \"But I can't let that get in the way of finding out the truth. And the truth is, she could have attacked Georgina.\"\n\n\"George is still a possibility,\" I said. \"We know for sure that George poisoned Georgina and sabotaged the brakes of her dirt bike. He admitted it.\"\n\n\"And Georgina admitted that she sabotaged the trampoline,\" Frank agreed. \"Let's think about the timing of the other events. Could Brynn have been behind them?\"\n\n\"She definitely could have torn up her teddy bear. She could have done it, then screamed like she'd just discovered it,\" I answered.\n\nFrank gave a sharp nod. \"Right. All the rest of us were still in the library, talking about the crayon drawing of the girl and the demon, when she 'found' the bear. She definitely had time to set it up, then yell for us.\"\n\n\"Brynn left during the conversation we were having about the murder after the dirt bike race,\" he added. \"She had the opportunity to do the drawing then. Or she could have done it earlier\u2014in the middle of the night.\"\n\n\"Now that we're talking about it, I can think of other times when Brynn left the room when the rest of us started talking about Nina's murder or the demon story Nina's dad had come up with to explain things to his daughter. To Brynn, if our theory is right.\"\n\n\"And a lot of times, after one of those conversations, something bad would happen. The bear. The drawing,\" Frank said. \"Maybe hearing people talk about what happened when she was little sets Brynn off.\"\n\n\"Maybe,\" I agreed. \"So I think what we have to do is set her off again.\"\n\n\"Right. Set her off again. She'll leave\u2014but this time we'll follow her.\"\n\n## The Knife\n\nBrynn and I sat in the great room late the next night. She couldn't sleep again. Joe and I had counted on that in our plan.\n\nMy part of the plan was to stir things up by talking about the murder of the woman who might be Brynn's mom. When she bolted\u2014which we were pretty sure she would\u2014Joe was in place to see where she went. Right now, he was positioned out of sight in the library. He had a small mirror that allowed him to keep watch on the hallway.\n\nSo go on, I told myself. There was no point in waiting.\n\nI opened my mouth, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't intentionally try to freak Brynn out.\n\nI was letting my emotions get in the way. That had never happened before. Because I'd never felt about another suspect the way I did about Brynn.\n\nMaybe I should have agreed to let Joe do this part. He'd offered. But I was the natural one to offer to sit up with Brynn. She and Joe were friends, yeah. But he hadn't spent most of last night holding her hand. The way I was holding her hand right now.\n\nDo it, I ordered myself. It's the plan. If she's the perp, you have to know it. You can't put everyone in this house at risk because you won't step up.\n\nI swallowed hard. My mouth and throat were as dry as if I'd been eating sand. \"Sometimes when it's really quiet in here, like now, I start thinking about the murder,\" I said, my voice coming out rough. \"I've never been in a room where somebody was killed before. At least not that I know of.\"\n\n\"Me either,\" Brynn said. Her fingers tightened on mine. They were cold. And trembling a little.\n\n\"Do you think it's true that emotions can get trapped in a place? I saw something like that on this show, Spectral.\" The only reason I'd ever watched it was because Joe was addicted\u2014even though the ghosts on the show were so clearly fake. \"People who are sensitives are supposed to be able to feel the fear and anger that's trapped wherever something violent has happened.\"\n\n\"You're starting to sound like Ann,\" Brynn told me. She pulled her hand away. Was she getting ready to take off?\n\nNot yet. I had to push harder.\n\n\"I'm not talking about demons,\" I answered. \"I'm just talking about psychic energy. A man killing his own wife in front of their daughter\u2014that's intense stuff. Maybe it does leave some kind of residue. Maybe it's my imagination, but when the room is almost empty, I think I can feel something.\"\n\nBrynn jerked to her feet. \"I think . . . I'm going to go to bed.\"\n\n\"You sure?\" I asked.\n\nShe didn't answer. Just left. The way she always seemed to leave when the murder came up.\n\nI forced myself to do a slow twenty-five count. Then I stepped into the hall. Joe was waiting for me.\n\n\"Did she go into her room?\" I whispered.\n\nHe shook his head. \"Down the stairs.\"\n\nThat's not what I wanted to hear. What you want is the truth, I reminded myself.\n\n\"Come on,\" said Joe. Keeping in the shadows, we crept over to the head of the stairs. Just in time to see Brynn heading out the front door.\n\nJoe and I rushed down the stairs. I strode over to the dining room window and peered outside. \"She's in the garden. She's walking fast, \" I told Joe.\n\nWe let her get a little more of a head start, then followed. Through the garden and into the orchard. The orchard where Georgina almost died.\n\nWhy was Brynn out here?\n\nShe started to run. She stumbled over a root but didn't slow down. Not until she got to the northeast corner. Then she dropped to her knees and began to dig. Only about twenty-five feet from where Georgina's blood had soaked into the ground.\n\nJoe and I froze. Watching.\n\nWhat was she doing?\n\nShe clawed at the ground. Frantic. I could hear her ragged breathing as she pulled something free. Something that glinted in the moonlight. It took me a second to register what it was.\n\nA knife.\n\nBrynn stood up and raised the blade high in the air. Aimed at her chest.\n\n\"No!\" I screamed. \"Brynn, stop!\"\n\n\"Don't!\" Joe shouted.\n\nBrynn started to bring the knife down. I launched myself at her. I hit the back of her knees with my shoulder, and we both hit the ground.\n\nWhere was the knife? Did she still have it? I didn't see it in her hand.\n\n\"Got it!\" Joe cried.\n\n\"Brynn, what were you doing?\" I exclaimed. I grabbed her by the shoulders and stared into her face. \"What were you trying to do?\"\n\nHer eyes were blank. I don't think she saw me at all.\n\nI gave her a light shake. \"Brynn!\"\n\nShe didn't answer. She didn't even blink. It was like I was holding a dead body.\n\n## Game Over\n\n\"It's over.\" Ripley set her suitcase down in the entry hall.\n\n\"I don't see why the show's canceled,\" James complained aloud. \"We know Brynn was the psycho.\"\n\n\"This time,\" said Hal. \"Maybe they figured three people trying to end the game meant it really shouldn't happen.\"\n\n\"If we want to keep going, they should let us,\" Olivia declared.\n\n\"Georgina did almost die. And Mitch killed a PA,\" Hal reminded us. \"Maybe the show should have been shut down a long time ago.\"\n\nOlivia raised her eyebrows. It was like even now she couldn't believe Hal was disagreeing with her in front of everyone.\n\n\"The taxis should be here shortly,\" Veronica announced as she joined us.\n\n\"I think we should each get some cash,\" James told her. \"The next person to drop out would have gotten paid. And we're being forced to drop out.\"\n\n\"Yeah, we should get something,\" Olivia agreed.\n\n\"You've all been given something very valuable,\" Veronica told us.\n\n\"What? I wasn't given anything,\" James protested.\n\n\"You were all given the chance to realize that you have more than you need. Every one of you. You've learned that you can get by with much less than you ever thought,\" Veronica explained. I could tell she was trying not to smile.\n\n\"Maybe we've all been given the chance to sue you and the other producers,\" Olivia shot back.\n\n\"You all signed releases when you agreed to be on the show,\" Veronica reminded us. \"You agreed not to hold the producers responsible for any injuries. And it was made clear that the show could be stopped at any time, and that it might not even air at all.\"\n\n\"Hey, Bobby T said the option on his blog has been renewed. He's getting a boatload of cash,\" Ripley announced, reading a text message on her phone. We'd gotten all our luxury items back an hour ago.\n\n\"He has a boatload of debt, too,\" James said. \"The loser probably didn't break even.\"\n\nI heard a car pull up in front. Then two more. It was time to go home.\n\nOlivia suddenly rushed over to us. Make that Olivia suddenly rushed over to Frank.\n\n\"Here.\" She thrust a large sheet of paper into my brother's hands. \"I know Gail would want you to have this\u2014even though she practically gave birth to a cow the day you almost caught her sketching it.\"\n\nFrank and I exchanged a quick glance. So that was why the girls had acted so freaky that day. They were trying to keep Frank from seeing the sketch book, but not for any crime-related reason.\n\nI turned my attention to the sketch. It was the worst drawing of Frank you could possibly imagine. The eyelashes on him. Step back. It was like he was the spokesboy for a new kind of man mascara or something.\n\nI started to snicker. Then it hit me. Olivia wasn't handing over a sketch of me.\n\nI smiled as something else hit me. Gail probably took the sketch she did of your hero home with her. She was probably sleeping with it under her pillow. Yeah. She'd wanted to keep the one she'd drawn of me. I'm pretty sure that's what the deal was. And I'm a detective, so I should know.\n\nOne of the cab drivers gave an impatient honk.\n\n\"I guess we'd better get going,\" Olivia said. \"Sorry if I got a little intense sometimes,\" she added to Frank.\n\n\"Everybody did,\" Frank answered.\n\n\"I just wish we'd realized what was going on with Brynn earlier,\" Frank said quietly as we stowed our suitcases in the trunk of the second taxi. \"Maybe we could have helped her.\"\n\n\"She's getting help now,\" I reminded him. \"The psychiatric hospital is where she belongs.\"\n\nFrank nodded, but I knew he was still running through scenarios where we were able to stop Brynn before she hurt anyone.\n\n\"Let it go, Frank,\" I told him as we got into the taxi together. \"We completed our mission. None of the contestants ended up dead.\"\n\nHe nodded again. But he was still thinking about her. I wasn't sure if he'd ever stop.\n\n###   FRANK\n\n\"I've got to do it,\" I told Joe. \"But you don't have to come. It's not an official mission.\"\n\n\"Are you kidding?\" Joe said. \"I'm not passing up the chance to wear my Diesels.\" He patted the jacket pocket where he'd stashed the sunglasses that had been part of his Joe Carr cover. He hadn't been able to wear them since we came back from Deprivation House a few months ago. There would have been waaay too many questions. Our parents are generous and everything. But they'd never shell out for three-hundred-dollar shades. And it's not like Joe has that kind of cash.\n\nWe mounted up on our motorcycles. Four hours later, we rode through the wrought-iron gates of Plainview Hospital. It was supposed to be the best in the country. It looked like a nice place. There were some patients sitting in the front garden, getting some sun. But it was still hard to think of Brynn here.\n\n\"You ready?\" Joe asked after we parked.\n\nI wasn't. But more time wasn't going to change that. \"Yeah,\" I told him. I led the way inside and gave our names\u2014our cover-story names\u2014to the woman at the front desk. \"Nina's doctor will take you back,\" she said. \"She wants to talk to you before you see Nina.\"\n\nWas Brynn\u2014I still thought of her as Brynn\u2014okay? She'd been in here for a couple of months. Had her doctor been able to help her at all? Would she be happy to see me? And Joe? Or would we just be part of a horrible memory?\n\n\"Hi, I'm Dr. Bastajian.\" A short woman with a ponytail walked over and shook our hands.\n\n\"How is Brynn\u2014I mean Nina?\" I asked in a rush.\n\n\"She's making progress,\" the doctor answered. \"But she still has a long way to go. She's just beginning to remember what happened when she was back in the house.\"\n\n\"She blanked everything out? Trying to stab herself? Stabbing Georgina?\" Joe asked.\n\n\"It's more complicated than that. Being back in the house where she saw her mother killed by her father was extremely traumatic. Nina began to dissociate, have blackouts.\"\n\n\"So she wasn't even aware she was doing things like putting pieces of glass in with the ice cubes?\" I asked. We'd figured out that that's when Brynn had started breaking down. Mary had insisted she hadn't been responsible for the glass that cut up James's mouth as well as the fire in Bobby T's room and the knives in Brynn's makeup bag, and it turned out she was telling the truth. Mary had been doing a lot of sabotage\u2014but nothing violent. Sending us e-mail death threats was more her style. But Brynn . . . She'd even done things to hurt herself!\n\n\"She absolutely wasn't aware,\" Dr. Bastajian said. \"I think in some way, she was trying to make the demon story that her father told her true. It was too horrific to accept that her father had simply killed her mother.\"\n\n\"So the demon story . . . ,\" said Joe. \"I mean, I know it wasn't true, but are you saying that Brynn's mother didn't actually try to attack her?\"\n\n\"No. Nina was beginning to remember what really happened that night,\" Dr. Bastajian explained. \"Her mother hadn't started using drugs or alcohol again. But she had decided she wanted to leave her husband. They fought, and he killed her.\"\n\n\"And he came up with that story about the demon and convinced Brynn\u2014Nina\u2014that that was what happened,\" I said.\n\n\"Exactly,\" the doctor agreed. \"Nina grew up with her grandparents in Indiana, living a quiet life away from all of this. Her grandparents helped her change her first and last name to Brynn Fulgham, so that she would be safe from nosy media hounds. Then, when Nina realized a reality show was going to be filmed in her old house, the house where the murder happened, she was determined to go back. She thought being there would somehow allow her to remember everything that really happened that night. The pieces she was starting to remember were haunting her.\"\n\n\"So are we supposed to not mention the old murder or the stuff Brynn did when she was having one of her episodes?\" Joe asked.\n\n\"Just follow her lead. Don't push. But if she wants to talk, it's fine,\" Dr. Bastajian said. \"Come on. I'll take you to her room.\" She led us through a maze of hallways, then tapped on a closed door. \"Nina, you have visitors.\" She swung the door open.\n\nAnd I saw Brynn. For the first time in months. She sat in front of a small desk in the corner of her room. And she looked . . . she looked like Brynn. Clear-eyed. A little smile on her face. \"Hi,\" she said, without quite looking at me or Joe.\n\n\"Hey, Nina,\" said Joe. I guess he could tell I was having trouble getting words out.\n\n\"You can keep calling me Brynn,\" she said.\n\n\"So, uh, how are you?\" I asked. It was like I had just learned English a few days ago. It was hard to find any words.\n\nBrynn lifted her hands, then let them fall in her lap in a helpless gesture. \"Let's talk about you guys instead. So I guess being in the house was good for you two at least.\"\n\nJoe and I glanced at each other.\n\n\"I mean, you two, you got to know each other. And you're here, together. So I guess you finally kind of became friends,\" Brynn explained.\n\n\"Yeah, I guess we finally kind of did. Getting winning or losing out of the picture helped,\" Joe told her.\n\nDr. Bastajian's cell beeped. She scanned the text message. \"Nina, your father is here. I'm assuming\u2014\"\n\n\"I don't want to see him,\" Brynn answered, her voice hard.\n\nThe doctor nodded. \"I'll go speak to him. Enjoy your visit.\"\n\n\"I can't believe he thinks I'd want to see his face!\" Brynn burst out. \"Now that I know what he did. And he'll never have to go to prison for it. He's already had his trial. He can't be tried again for the same crime. And it's my fault. It was my testimony that got him off.\"\n\n\"You were a little girl. You believed what your father told you,\" I said. \"Pretty much anyone would.\"\n\n\"I just hate that he gets to live his whole life as this man who killed his wife to protect his daughter. No one will ever know the truth.\" Brynn took a deep breath. \"Sorry,\" she said. \"I know I'm going off. I'm working on dealing with it. And dealing with what I did too. I wrote to Georgina. I tried to explain. She was actually really great about it.\"\n\n\"Did you hear the movie option on Bobby T's blog got renewed?\" Joe asked. \"It's getting an insane number of hits a day.\"\n\nI guess Joe was having trouble knowing what to say too. He was kind of babbling.\n\n\"If I wanted to get info out there, Bobby T's blog is where I'd want it,\" Joe continued.\n\nHe wasn't babbling. \"I'm sure Bobby T would be happy to put the real story about your dad on his site. At least then people would know the truth,\" I told Brynn.\n\n\"You think he'd do that?\" asked Brynn.\n\n\"Are you serious?\" Joe replied. \"He'll have it on there today if you want.\"\n\n\"I want,\" Brynn said. \"I want to tell what I did too. I want to try to explain. Apologize.\"\n\n\"You weren't even aware of what you were doing,\" I reminded her.\n\n\"I still did it,\" Brynn told me. \"I have to take responsibility. I'm not going to be like my father. I'm not going to try to come up with a story that makes me a hero. Or that just makes what I did seem okay somehow.\"\n\nShe was an amazing person. No wonder she was the first girl I fell in love with.\n\nBut I'd never be able to see her again. Frank Dooley didn't really exist. I'd only been able to be him for a couple more hours. To say good-bye.\n\n\"Are you okay?\" Joe asked me when we left.\n\n\"Yeah. What about you? Are you going to be okay?\" I climbed on my bike.\n\n\"Me? Yeah,\" said Joe.\n\n\"Are you sure? You know you're not going to be able to wear the Diesels again,\" I reminded him.\n\nJoe grinned. \"Even without them, I'm still the more happenin' Hardy. And someday a girl is going to realize that absolute truth!\"\n","meta":{"redpajama_set_name":"RedPajamaBook"}}
+{"text":" \nBooks by V. M. Burns\n\nTHE PLOT IS MURDER\n\nREAD HERRING HUNT\n\nPublished by Kensington Publishing Corporation\nRead Herring Hunt\n\nV. M. BURNS\n\nKENSINGTON BOOKS\n\nwww.kensingtonbooks.com\n\nAll copyrighted material within is Attributor Protected.\nTable of Contents\n\nAlso by  \nTitle Page  \nCopyright Page  \nDedication  \nAcknowledgments  \nChapter 1  \nChapter 2  \nChapter 3  \nChapter 4  \nChapter 5  \nChapter 6  \nChapter 7  \nChapter 8  \nChapter 9  \nChapter 10  \nChapter 11  \nChapter 12  \nChapter 13  \nChapter 14  \nChapter 15  \nChapter 16  \nChapter 17  \nChapter 18  \nChapter 19  \nChapter 20  \nChapter 21  \nChapter 22  \nChapter 23  \nTeaser chapter\n\nThis book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.\n\nKENSINGTON BOOKS are published by\n\nKensington Publishing Corp.   \n119 West 40th Street   \nNew York, NY 10018\n\nCopyright \u00a9 2018 by Valerie Burns\n\nAll rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of the Publisher, excepting brief quotes used in reviews.\n\nKensington and the K logo Reg. U.S. Pat. & TM Off.\n\neISBN-13-13: 978-1-4967-1184-7   \neISBN-10: 1-4967-1184-X   \nFirst Kensington Electronic Edition: May 2018\n\nISBN: 978-1-4967-1183-0\n\nIn loving memory of Coco Chanel  \nfor 17 years of love and cuddles\nAcknowledgments\n\nSpecial thanks to my agent, Dawn Dowdle, at Blue Ridge Literary; Mary Lasher for capturing my fur babies so well and providing such great cover art; Kristen Lepionka for answering my S.O.S. and providing great promo support and social media graphics; and the wonderful staff at Kensington Publishing, John Scognamiglio, Paula Reedy, and Michelle Addo.\n\nThanks to Anthony Cameron (aka Trooper Tony) and Eric Haskin for answering my questions related to police procedures. Thanks to Dave \"Moose\" Mitchell (aka Missouri Man) for allowing me to pick your brain regarding college football rules and regulations; and Chris Siriano for assistance with the House of David. Special thanks to my friend, Cassandra Morgan, for taking pity on me and allowing me to benefit from your social media expertise.\n\nI appreciate all of the support I've received from '17 Scribes and fellow unicorn Kellye Garrett. Thanks to my SHU Tribe (June 2012) and especially Jessica Barlow, Lana Ayres, and Michelle Lane. I am so incredibly blessed to have such a fantastic training team (Deborah Hughes, Grace Dixon, Jamie Medlin, and Tena Elkins). Thanks for helping to make my days easier so I can spend my nights pursuing my dream. You guys rock!\n\nMy dream of writing a book and getting published would not be a reality without the love and support of friends, family, and really good friends who have become my family. This includes my dad, Benjamin Burns; my sister, Jacquelyn Rucker; my niece, Jillian Rucker, and nephew, Christopher Rucker; and good friends Shelitha Mckee and Sophia Muckerson. You have all been there throughout all of the ups and downs on this entire roller-coaster ride. Thanks for always having my back.\nChapter 1\n\n\"Did you see the getup that little floozy had on?\"\n\n\"Shhhh.\" I glanced around to make sure the \"little floozy\" was out of earshot. Tact wasn't Nana Jo's strong suit.\n\n\"Don't shush me. I've seen Sumo wrestlers wearing more fabric.\"\n\nNana Jo exaggerated, but not by much. Melody Hardwick was a supermodel thin, heavily made-up college senior who had attached herself figuratively and literally to my assistant, Dawson Alexander.\n\n\"Surely that boy knows she's nothing more than a little gold digger.\" Nana Jo had taken an instant dislike to Melody.\n\n\"You don't know she's a gold digger. You just don't like her.\" I locked the door to the bookstore. \"Besides, it's not like Dawson has any money.\"\n\n\"He may not have a pot to pee in now, but the boy has PEP.\" Nana Jo wiped down the counters and bagged the trash.\n\n\"What's pep?\"\n\n\"Potential earning power. That boy is the best quarterback MISU's had in at least a decade. They're undefeated and if things keep going like last week, they have a shot at a bowl game and maybe a championship.\"\n\nMy grandmother had always been a sports enthusiast, but ever since the Michigan Southwest University, or MISS YOU as the locals called it, quarterback started helping out in my bookstore, she became more of a fanatic.\n\n\"He was embarrassed. Did you see how she clung to him?\"\n\n\"Dawson's a big boy. He can make his own decisions.\"\n\nBased on the look she gave me, she wasn't convinced. Frankly, I wasn't convinced either. I was concerned about him too. School was a challenge for Dawson. At the end of his freshman year, he was placed on academic probation. Thanks to a lot of hard work and tutoring from me and Nana Jo throughout the summer, he'd raised his grades, avoided academic suspension, and turned his life around. He didn't have to work at the bookstore anymore. His football scholarship covered room and board. I never wanted to charge him for staying in the studio apartment I created in my garage, but student athletes had to pay the going rate for housing and get paid fair market wages for work.\n\n\"Girls like that ain't nothing but trouble. You mark my words. Just like Delilah, she'll come after him with a pair of scissors first chance she gets. That woman is nothing but trouble.\"\n\nNana Jo's words broke my reverie and brought back the worry I thought I'd eliminated. I tried to shake it off, but it lingered at the back of my mind.\n\nWe cleaned the store and then she hurried off for a date with her boyfriend, Freddie.\n\nI took a quick tour around the store. I looked at the books neatly stacked on each shelf. It was still hard for me to believe I owned my own mystery bookstore. Market Street Mysteries had been a dream my late husband and I shared for years. After his death over a year ago, I was finally living our dream. I walked down each aisle and ran my hands across the solid wood bookshelves that still smelled woodsy and fresh and shined with the oil polish Andrew, my Amish craftsman, gave me. After six months, the store was doing well and I still got a thrill walking through and realizing it was mine. My four-legged companions on these strolls trailed along behind, toenails clicking on the wood floors. Toy poodles, Snickers and Oreo, may not share my love of mysteries, but they definitely approved of the baked goods that made their way under tables and counters.\n\nThe back of the bookstore was enclosed to provide a yard for privacy and an area for the poodles to chase squirrels and bask in the sunlight. As fall hit the Michigan coastline, the weather had turned cool. The leaves were starting to darken from bright shades of yellowy green to deeper, rich hues of amber, burgundy, and russet. Lake Michigan was also undergoing a change from the deep blue calm of summer to the pale blue that blended into the horizon and was only discernible from the sky by the choppy white swells that danced across the surface and pounded the shore. Autumn was my favorite time of year, and I lingered outside and enjoyed the sunset until Snickers reminded me she hadn't been fed by scratching my leg and ruining my tights. I needed to remember to make an appointment with the groomers first thing tomorrow or give up wearing skirts.\n\nWhen my husband, Leon, and I dreamed of the bookstore, we planned to make the upper level into a rental unit to offset the cost. After his death, I sold the home we'd lived in and turned the upper level into a two-bedroom loft for me and the poodles. Nana Jo moved in after a dead body was found in the back courtyard, but she still had her villa at a retirement village. I never dreamed how much I'd enjoy living in the space.\n\nNext week would be one year since Leon's death. The pain was less crippling. The bookstore kept me busy during the day. But the nights were still difficult. I started writing to help occupy my time and my mind. Six months ago I'd finished the first draft of a British cozy mystery and spent the last few months editing. Nana Jo wanted me to send it out to an agent, but that would involve allowing someone besides me and my grandmother, who loved me, to read it. I wasn't ready for that type of humiliation and rejection yet. Besides, in the unlikely event that a publisher was interested in my book, they'd want to know what else I had. What if one book was all I had in me? The only way to find out would be to try again. So after dinner, I made a cup of tea and headed to my laptop.\n\nWickfield Lodge, English country home  \nof Lord William Marsh\u2013November 1938\n\nThompkins entered the back salon where the Marsh family was having tea and coughed. \"I'm sorry, but the Duke of Kingfordshire is on the telephone.\"\n\nLady Daphne was in her favorite seat by the window. She started to rise but was stopped when Thompkins discreetly coughed again.\n\n\"His Grace the duke asked to speak to your ladyship.\" He turned toward Lady Elizabeth.\n\nLady Elizabeth Marsh glanced at her niece Daphne, noting the blush that left her cheeks flushed. She placed her teacup down and hurried out of the room. In the library, she picked up the telephone. \"Hello, James dear, is there\u2014\"\n\n\"Thank goodness you're home. I'm sorry but I don't have time for pleasantries. Time is of the essence.\" Lord James FitzAndrew Browning, normally calm and composed, had a slight tremor in his voice, which reflected the urgency of his call even more than his words and lack of propriety. The duke took a deep breath and then rushed on. \"This is going to sound strange, but I need you to trust me. You're going to get a call from the Duchess of Windsor asking for permission to move her hunting party to Wickfield Lodge this weekend. It's vital she be allowed to do so.\"\n\nWhatever Lady Elizabeth expected, it hadn't been this. She stood frozen for a moment before recovering herself enough to respond. \"Well of course, James. We . . . we have no plans this weekend.\"\n\nJames released a huge sigh, and she could almost see him wiping his brow.\n\n\"James, you know we're happy to help any way we can, but you mentioned this was 'vital.' Vital to whom?\"\n\nJames hesitated a moment before responding. \"Vital to England. The Crown. Maybe the entire world.\"\n\nChapter 2\n\nSaturdays were busy days at the bookstore, and I was thankful my nephews, Christopher and Zaq, were home from college for fall break and helping out. The twins were invaluable in getting the bookstore up and running over the summer. The boys were twenty and while they were identical, their personalities were so different it was very easy to tell them apart. Both were tall and slender. Christopher was business oriented and preppy, while Zaq was technology inclined and edgier. Neither was a mystery lover, but they each had their own gifts, and I was thankful they were willing to spend time helping out their aunt and earn extra pocket money.\n\nNana Jo was a mystery lover and was great at helping match customers with authors and mystery subgenres like hard-boiled detective stories, cozy mysteries, or police procedurals.\n\nToday was a home football weekend for MISU and a bye week for the twins' school, Jesus and Mary University, or JAMU to the locals. When Dawson started working at the bookstore, I toyed with the idea of putting a television in the store so we could watch him play on Saturdays. However, a television in a bookstore seemed paradoxical. I compromised by foregoing the smooth jazz I normally piped in and tuned into the sports channel instead, at least for MISU and JAMU games. I expected complaints from people who liked to sit and read in peace and quiet. But so far the comments were all positive. I suspected the lack of protest was due to the customers' desire to support a hometown boy combined with their affection for Dawson's baked goods. They were willing to give up a little peace and quiet to support someone they knew.\n\nThankfully, Dawson and the MISU Tigers had today's game well in hand with a healthy lead of three touchdowns. Home team wins made for happy customers, and happy customers spent more money. As locals discovered Dawson lived and worked here, I'd noticed an increase in traffic. Many were football fans who wanted to congratulate him, talk sports, and get autographs for wide-eyed kids. The others were infatuated young girls who glanced shyly at him when he was working and then hid behind books, giggling whenever he looked at them. Regardless of the reason, the extra traffic was good for business.\n\nMISU won handily and I had a very good day in sales. The twins had dates and hurried out immediately at closing.\n\n\"You should go to the casino with me and the girls,\" Nana Jo said.\n\n\"Thanks, but I think I'll stay home. I want to get some writing done.\" We reshelved books and cleaned the store.\n\n\"Great. You started working on the next book in the series? You know, I'm really proud of you. But you still need to start sending your book out to agents. I hear getting published is a long process. I read somewhere Agatha Christie was rejected for five years before she got her first book deal.\"\n\n\"I know. I\u2014\"\n\nThe alarm system I'd installed this summer startled me and I dropped the books I was shelving. The alarm buzzed whenever a door or window was opened, even if the system wasn't armed. Nana Jo stepped around to see who had entered and I picked up the books I'd dropped.\n\nI placed the books on a nearby table and headed for the front of the store. I could have sworn I'd locked the door. Just as I came around the corner, I heard Nana Jo.\n\n\"We're closed.\"\n\n\"Oh, I know. I just thought I'd wait for Dawson.\"\n\nI struggled to recognize the voice. As I got to the main aisle, I saw Dawson's scantily clad girlfriend, Melody. Today's ensemble included more fabric than the one she wore yesterday, but not by much. A short black skintight miniskirt with a deep V-neck mesh cut top with fabric that barely covered her breasts and red, six-inch heels that Nana Jo's friend Irma called hooker heels.\n\n\"Lord have mercy. What're you wearing?\" Nana Jo stared openmouthed.\n\nThe shocked expression wasn't lost on Melody, who laughed and twirled to insure Nana Jo got the full effect. \"You like?\"\n\n\"Is someone watching your pole?\"\n\nMelody flushed and cocked her head and took a step forward as though she were about to say something insulting.\n\nYounger people often thought of the elderly as feeble and weak. However, my Nana Jo was close to six feet, two hundred pounds, held a green belt in aikido, and could shoot a bat off the top of a building at three hundred yards. Don't ask me how I know that. Despite the difference in their ages, in a fight, my money was on Nana Jo.\n\n\"Dawson isn't here and the store is closed.\" I stepped in between the two women. \"If you're looking for Dawson, I suggest you try campus.\"\n\nFor a moment, Melody looked at me as though I were gum she'd scrapped from the bottom of her shoe.\n\n\"What's going on?\"\n\nI was so intent on preventing an altercation between Nana Jo and Melody I hadn't heard Dawson enter through the back door.\n\nApparently, Melody hadn't either. \"Dawson. How long have you been there?\" She smiled big.\n\n\"Long enough.\" The chill in his words made me turn to look at him. His eyes were hard and his face was set like granite. \"What're you doing here, Melody? I told you we were finished yesterday.\"\n\nMelody kept her smile in place as she sauntered around me. \"I knew you couldn't really mean that. We both said things we didn't mean yesterday.\" She stood inches from Dawson and placed her hands on his chest and leaned close. \"Let's go up to your room and talk things over.\"\n\nDawson didn't move for several seconds, but I could see the vein in the side of his forehead bulge with each breath. Finally, he grabbed Melody by the wrist.\n\nShe winced in pain. \"Ouch. You're hurting me.\"\n\nDawson turned and walked out the way he came, dragging Melody by the wrist along with him.\n\n\"I guess he was smart enough to see through that little cheap hussy after all,\" Nana Jo said. \"I think that's the last we'll see of her.\"\n\nI hurried to secure the front door. Something in the way Melody looked and a flutter in my spine told me Nana Jo was wrong.\n\n* * *\n\nNormally, Sundays were spent with my mom. Church, lunch afterward, and girl time. This Sunday was no different. Today we were shopping in downtown South Harbor.\n\nUnlike North Harbor, South Harbor had a bustling downtown with picturesque cobblestone streets and brick storefronts that sold everything from fudge and truffles to overpriced coffee. Mixed between quaint soda shops and antique stores were clothing stores with shoes that cost more than a month of my salary when I was a teacher.\n\n\"Honey, isn't this cashmere sweater lovely? It would look great on you.\" My mom held up a bubblegum-pink garment that looked as though it might fit one of my thighs.\n\n\"Mom, I couldn't fit my imagination in that sweater.\"\n\n\"They have larger sizes, dear. I really think you need to upgrade your wardrobe. Everything you own is black or brown. You look like you're still in mourning.\" She placed the fluffy concoction up to my neck.\n\nI glanced at the tag and nearly choked. \"Are you joking? That sweater costs more than my house payment.\"\n\n\"You really should put more effort into your appearance. You've really let yourself go since Leon died. I think you're hiding behind your mourning and it's time you started living again, and maybe dating.\"\n\nI stared openmouthed. \"Not all of us can live the life of a princess. I don't have the time or money to waste getting my nails and hair done and buying overpriced sweaters. I have a business to run.\"\n\nThe salesclerk, who had walked up with a bright smile on her face, turned and walked away.\n\nMy mom sighed and replaced the sweater. She walked to the back of the store. That sigh spoke louder than any words could have. Obviously I had disappointed her again. I stood there for a moment and then sorted through the rack of sweaters, looking for one that would fit over my head without making me look like an overstuffed sausage. I could afford the sweater. That wasn't the problem. Finances had always been tight when Leon and I were working. A cook and an English teacher didn't buy cashmere sweaters. But I'd sold the house and used the insurance money to buy the building. The bookstore was doing well, not Fortune magazine worthy, but thanks to low overhead, frugal spending, and hard work, it was making a profit. One cashmere sweater wouldn't break me, and it would make my mom happy. But, as a grown woman in her mid-thirties, I shouldn't have to buy a sweater I didn't want to make my mom happy. I wished Nana Jo had come with us today. She would have understood and helped intercede between me and my mom.\n\nMy mom was so very different from Nana Jo; it was hard for me to imagine my grandmother gave birth to her. They were polar opposites. Josephine Thomas was tall and hardy. My mom, Grace Hamilton, was five feet, less than one hundred pounds dripping wet, and delicate. My mom was like a dainty porcelain figurine you keep on the tallest shelf behind a glass door, locked away from harm for fear of breaking it. Nana Jo blamed my grandpa, who always called my mom his little princess, for planting the \"princess seed\" in her head. In her mid-sixties, my mother had never had a job outside of the home. She'd never paid a bill until after my dad died. She was the princess.\n\nI dropped my mom off at her South Harbor condo and headed back over the bridge to North Harbor, where I belonged. I glanced at the pink shopping bag on the seat that contained a white cashmere sweater I would be too afraid of spilling anything on to ever wear and swung my car into the parking lot of a nearby liquor store. I glanced at my watch. Thankfully, it was after twelve, when alcohol could be purchased. I looked at the license plates of the cars parked in the lot, noting the majority were Indiana residents who had escaped across the state line into Michigan, where they could buy alcohol on Sunday. We were all escaping from something, but I didn't have the time or energy to figure out what at the moment. A bottle of wine would have to substitute for therapy for now.\n\n* * *\n\nDuring the summer, I saw quite a lot of Dawson. When the fall semester started, we barely saw each other, despite the fact he lived in the apartment over my garage. Twice daily football practices, weight training, and classes took up a lot of his time. But Dawson loved baking and he was really good at it. His apartment was a tiny studio with only a one-burner stove, which made it challenging to bake on a large scale. Dawson had gotten into the routine of using my kitchen to bake enough goodies to get us through the week at the bookstore. So, when I entered through the back door, I smelled a sweet, delicious aroma wafting down the stairs to greet me.\n\nI climbed the stairs without my normal escorts. Snickers and Oreo usually heard the garage door and bounded to the bottom of the stairs to greet me. However, the possibility of a cookie or treat dropping to the floor was a greater enticement than seeing me.\n\nI placed my pink bag on the counter with less care than I used for the bottle of wine. Dawson had his back to me as he lifted a tray of cookies out of the oven and placed them on a rack on the counter.\n\n\"What an amazing smell.\" I breathed deeply and allowed the smell of vanilla, almonds, and sugar to fill my senses.\n\n\"Thanks. You're just in time to try one.\" Dawson turned to face me.\n\n\"Oh my God! What happened to your face?\"\n\nHe didn't say anything, merely hung his head. I hurried around the counter and turned his face toward the light to get a closer look. Three red scratches trailed across both cheeks. There was a gash under his left eye and a bruise on his forehead. His eyes were bloodshot and dark circles underneath indicated he hadn't slept.\n\nHe tried to turn away, but I held his chin and forced him to look at me.\n\n\"What happened to you?\"\n\nWe stood like that so long I didn't think he would answer.\n\nEventually, the silence grew too much for him. \"I'm fine.\"\n\nI snorted. \"Well, you sure don't look fine.\"\n\nDawson shrugged. \"It's nothing.\" He forcefully, but gently, pulled my hands away and walked to the back of the kitchen. He leaned against the wall and folded his arms, providing a barrier.\n\nI took a deep breath and tried to steady my breathing. \"Was it your father? Is he out of jail?\"\n\nHe shook his head.\n\n\"Then who?\"\n\nHe hung his head. \"Let's just say Melody didn't take our breakup well.\"\n\n\"You should go to the doctor. Those scratches look deep, you\u2014\"\n\nHe was shaking his head before the words were out of my mouth. \"If I go to the doctor, the newspaper might find out.\"\n\nSad that at nineteen you had to be concerned about the newspapers running a story about a girl who lashed out when her boyfriend broke up with her. But this season the MISU Tigers were getting a lot of publicity, Dawson in particular.\n\nI went to the bathroom and got a cold compress and mercuric acid. He didn't balk when I made him sit at the dining room table and didn't say one word when I started to treat the cuts. \"Newspapers are the least of your worries. Wait until Nana Jo finds out!\"\n\nHe winced, but I wasn't sure if it was the mercuric acid or the thought of what Nana Jo would say.\n\n\"What an unusual request. James didn't have any other information?\" Lord William asked as he absent mindedly broke off a piece of his scone and fed it to Cuddles, the Cavalier King Charles Spaniel positioned at his feet.\n\n\"Not that he told me. Although, I'm sure he'll fill us in when he gets here.\" Lady Elizabeth picked up the knitting she kept nearby, which she said helped her think clearly.\n\n\"Is Lord Browning coming too?\" Lady Daphne Marsh picked at an imaginary string on her skirt and avoided making eye contact with her aunt.\n\n\"Well, I suppose so, although I didn't ask him. I just assumed he would.\" Elizabeth looked at her husband. \"You don't mind do you, dear?\"\n\n\"No. No. Of course not.\" Lord William tossed the remains of the scone down to the dog and pulled out his pipe. \"I'm sure James wouldn't have asked if it wasn't important.\"\n\n\"My thoughts exactly.\" Lady Elizabeth resumed her knitting.\n\n\"I don't suppose you know anything about this?\" Lord William asked his niece.\n\nLady Elizabeth Marsh sighed. Sometimes her hus band could be rather slow to read the signs or he would have noticed his niece, Daphne, had said very little since Lord James Browning's name was mentioned. The two met six months ago when he came to help out his friend and old classmate Victor Carlston, Earl of Lochloren, who was accused of murdering one of Daphne's beaux. At the time, Victor believed he was in love with Daphne and chivalrously stepped in to protect her by allowing the police to believe him guilty of murder. Lord James helped to reveal the true killer and ensured his friend's freedom. Victor was now living in wedded bliss with Daphne's sister, Penelope, down the road at his family estate, Bidwell Cottage. The Marshes hoped another announcement of marriage would be forthcoming as Lord James and Lady Daphne seemed destined for the altar. However, the duke's visits of late had been fewer and far between.\n\n\"No. I haven't spoken to James . . . ah, the duke in nearly two weeks,\" Daphne said almost in a whisper.\n\n\"I suppose you better tell Thompkins and the rest of the staff to prepare for guests,\" Lord William said.\n\n\"I would, but I think I want to wait until we're sure,\" Lady Elizabeth said. \"Technically, she hasn't asked yet. I don't even know how many people to expect.\"\n\n\"Do you suppose David will come too?\" Lord William asked.\n\nLady Elizabeth knitted. \"I have no idea. The last I heard, he was in France.\"\n\n\"I don't suppose there will be a problem with the Queen Mother and the rest of the family?\" Daphne asked.\n\n\"Well, I guess that depends on what type of problem you mean.\" Lady Elizabeth knitted silently for a few moments. \"Bertie and Elizabeth are still very angry and the Queen Mother is disappointed in David. I still feel rather badly that none of the family attended the wedding.\"\n\nLord William sputtered. \"But really, how could we attend? It would have been a sign the family agreed with his abdication to marry a divorced woman\u2014an American.\" Lord William waved his pipe while he spoke, flinging ashes across the sofa.\n\nLady Elizabeth looked up and shook her head. The sofa was starting to show bare patches from the maids brushing off tobacco. It would have to be recovered soon. \"Well, I don't know if the fact she was twice divorced or an American was the objectionable part. I might have considered attending if the wed ding were one day earlier or one day later.\"\n\n\"I agree. It was as though they were thumbing their noses at the family by getting married on King George's birthday,\" Daphne said. \"Really, his own father's birthday.\"\n\n\"Bad form.\" Lord William refilled his pipe.\n\n\"Regardless of the circumstances, David and Bertie are brothers, and I believe they'll work things out in the end,\" Lady Elizabeth said. \"Besides, James said it was vital to the Crown that she hosts her hunt ing party here. So, that must mean the king is at least aware of the event.\"\n\nLord William nodded and puffed on his pipe.\n\n\"At any rate, it doesn't appear we'll find out how the Crown feels about things. The duchess hasn't called. What if she's found another place to hunt?\" Daphne asked.\n\nThompkins entered the room silently and coughed. \"Her Grace, Wallis Duchess of Windsor is on the telephone for your ladyship.\"\n\nChapter 3\n\nNana Jo's response when she saw Dawson's face was loud and littered with old-fashioned words like \"floozy,\" \"harpy,\" \"tart,\" and \"shrew.\" When she calmed down, she mixed up a concoction with aloe vera gel, honey, vitamin E oil, and baking soda. Dawson looked like he had leprosy most of the day Sunday, and he had to fight off Snickers, who kept trying to lick off his mask, but Monday his face looked so much better, it was like night and day. The scars were still there. Only time would truly heal them, but the improvement was amazing.\n\n\"Mrs. Thomas, you're a miracle worker.\" Dawson kissed Nana Jo on the cheek.\n\n\"Well, you need about two more days before the scars will disappear completely.\" Nana Jo stared at her handiwork. \"But at least you don't look as though you've been in a catfight.\"\n\n\"You never cease to amaze me,\" I said after Dawson hurried off to campus.\n\nNana Jo and I sat at the breakfast bar and drank coffee.\n\n\"Where on earth did you learn to mix up your healing paste?\"\n\nNana Jo smiled as she sipped her coffee. \"I grew up on a farm. There was always some kind of accident that happened on a farm and most people were too poor to go riding off miles to a doctor. My grandmother used to be the local midwife and, well . . . medicine woman. She mixed all kinds of things up in her kitchen and grew herbs for healing everything from the croup to rheumatic fever.\"\n\n\"I never knew that.\" I stared at my grandmother. I'd known this woman all my life and she was still able to surprise me.\n\nNana Jo shrugged. \"I never thought it worth talking about. Most of those old remedies would be considered nothing more than old wives' tales nowadays.\"\n\n\"Scientists are discovering that a lot of those old remedies actually worked. I read an article recently that chicken soup really does help with a cold. Although scientists aren't sure if there is some ingredient in the chicken soup itself or if it's in the person's mind. Whatever the reason, it works.\"\n\nWe sat for a few moments and talked about poultices, plasters, and herbal teas. Then we went downstairs to the bookstore.\n\nI had a lot of fears when I quit my job as an English teacher and opened the bookstore. Would I be able to handle things alone? Would I be able to make enough to support myself? Did people still read books? The answer to all of those questions was yes. Recently, an old friend I hadn't seen in over twenty years asked if I found working in a bookstore monotonous and boring. I didn't even need to think before I answered. Market Street Mysteries was a lot of things, but monotonous and boring certainly wasn't one of them. New people came in every day. Boxes of books arrived weekly. Some boxes included books from writers I'd read for years, which were like old friends. Familiar series from Victoria Thompson, Emily Brightwell, Jeanne M. Dams, and Martha Grimes sent a thrill of excitement through my body as I gazed at the bright covers and anticipated the joy of figuring out whodunit. There was also the joy of discovering new writers and wondering which ones would be added to my list of favorites. On those rare moments when the store was quiet, I sometimes went for a walk in downtown North Harbor and stepped into shops owned by my neighbors. The bookstore had helped me through one of the worst times of my life, the death of my husband and best friend. I'd created a new life for myself with new friends and I hoped a new career as a writer, one day.\n\nA few doors down from Market Street Mysteries, a new restaurant had opened. I stood in front of the window and stared at the menu taped on the door. I looked at my watch and realized it was after two, and my stomach growled as I read the menu. I stepped inside and waited while my eyes adjusted to the darker interior.\n\n\"I'm glad you decided to come in.\" A man with salt-and-pepper hair and beard, cut close in the style worn by the military, soft brown eyes, and a big smile came out from behind the bar.\n\nI must have looked puzzled because he motioned to the window. \"I saw you outside.\"\n\n\"Oh. Yes. Sorry.\"\n\n\"No need to apologize. That's why I put the menu up. I was hoping it would entice people to come inside.\"\n\n\"Well it worked.\" I laughed.\n\n\"How about a nice table by the window?\"\n\nI nodded and took a seat in the chair he held out for me.\n\n\"I have a lovely white wine from a local vineyard.\"\n\n\"Oh, no. Just water with lemon, please.\"\n\nWhen he left, I looked around. The restaurant was clean and decorated with an urban edge. Exposed brick walls, stained concrete floors, and iron fixtures created a modern, hip atmosphere. Televisions lined the wall behind the bar. My waiter returned with a glass and a carafe of ice water with lemon.\n\nHe smiled as he placed the carafe of water on the table. \"You own the mystery bookstore a few doors down, don't you?\"\n\nI took a sip of water and nodded.\n\n\"I thought so. I've been trying to meet all of the other store owners around here. I'm Frank Patterson.\"\n\nHe held out his hand and we shook.\n\n\"Samantha Washington, but you can call me Sam.\"\n\n\"Sam, I'm pleased to meet you. How long have you been down here?\"\n\nI knew he was asking about how long my bookstore had been open. I looked at him and started to respond when my attention was caught by the picture on the television behind him.\n\nMelody Hardwick's picture filled the screen. Then it was replaced by pictures of a body covered by a blanket.\n\nI gasped.\n\nThe words that scrolled across the bottom of the screen said Melody's body had been found by early morning joggers. The police believed her death was the result of \"foul play.\" The picture that next filled the screen and nearly stopped my heart was of Dawson getting into the back of a police car.\n\n* * *\n\nI didn't remember the walk back to the bookstore. Nana Jo said I came in looking like a whirling dervish. I did remember marching into the South Harbor police station with Nana Jo. The brick two-story building was downtown and not far from my bookstore. North Harbor and South Harbor shared the same Lake Michigan coastline. The two towns were separated by the St. Thomas River that zigzagged through northern Indiana and southern Michigan for over two hundred miles and ended as it wrapped around North Harbor in a U and flowed into Lake Michigan.\n\nThe county police station and courthouse were attached and comprised a sprawling complex located on an area that sat on a small street in between North and South Harbor. Other than field trips as a child, I had only been to the complex as an adult when I was summoned for jury duty. My memory of the facility was prior to 911 and didn't include security cameras and metal detectors that would rival those at the nearby River Bend airport.\n\nI was so concerned about Dawson I didn't remember a number of things from the time I saw his face on the television to the moment I walked into the police station. However, the memory that would live with me until my death would be when Nana Jo set off the metal detectors and we were instantly swarmed by police officers with guns drawn, all shouting for us to raise our hands and lay down on the floor. I remember the officer who pulled my wrists behind my back and the feel of the cold metal handcuffs as he placed them on my wrists. I looked over at my grandmother as she lay by my side, also cuffed and on the ground. My heart raced and my blood pounded in my head. Yep. That was a memory that would stay with me forever.\n\nThankfully, my nephews hadn't been idle after we left the bookstore. One of them must have called their mother. Never had I been so happy to see and hear my sister, Jenna, as I was at that moment.\n\n\"What do you think you're doing?\" Jenna said in the cold, steely voice I dreaded. \"You have ten seconds to get my sister and grandmother off that floor or as God is my witness, I will sue every last one of you.\" Jenna was a criminal defense attorney well-known by the police for her tough, no-nonsense attitude. I'd once heard that the district attorney's office referred to her as a pit bull and I had to say, as her sister, I thought it was pretty accurate.\n\n\"You know these women?\" One of the officers stepped up from the pack.\n\n\"I just said that, didn't I? And you have two seconds to lower your weapons,\" Jenna said between clenched teeth. Then she turned her back to the officers and looked directly into the camera that was positioned over the door. \"As you can see, these imbeciles have my sister and elderly grandmother handcuffed and laying on the cold concrete. Obviously they aren't a threat, yet these officers continue to point their weapons.\"\n\nThe officers put away their guns. One of the officers helped me to a standing position. It took two of them to help Nana Jo to stand.\n\n\"Your 'elderly' grandmother set off the metal detector.\" He turned Nana Jo's purse upside down and all the contents flew across the floor. His cocky smile turned into a sneer as he looked at Nana Jo's iPad, phone, notebook, brush, holster, makeup, and about twenty other items lying on the ground. He kicked the empty holster and looked around the floor. But there was no weapon.\n\n\"Hey, Barney Fife, you break my iPad and you're buying me another one,\" Nana Jo said.\n\nJenna smiled and continued to address the camera. \"No weapon, just an empty holster. And if she had brought her weapon, you'd find her permit to carry in her wallet.\"\n\nThe smirk vanished as the officer looked at the wallet and found the permit. He returned the wallet and other belongings to Nana Jo's purse and nodded to the officers holding us and the handcuffs were removed.\n\n\"I guess it was the iPad that set off the detector. Anyway, she should have announced she had a weapon and shown her carry permit immediately,\" he said as though he were educating a child\u2014bad mistake.\n\n\"I'll keep that in mind the next time when I actually have a weapon. Of course, you would have known that if you nincompoops would have waited a minute before Wyatt Earp and the rest of the posse drew their guns like they were about to shoot it out at the O.K. Corral.\" Nana Jo snatched her purse away from the officer.\n\n\"I intend to subpoena the videotapes, so make sure nothing happens to them. If my sister or grandmother is injured due to this incident, you will be hearing from me.\"\n\nThe officer looked as though he wanted to say something, but the look in Jenna's eyes showed him silence would be his best defense.\n\n\"Now, where have you taken Dawson Alexander?\" Jenna's question brought me back to the reason for our visit.\n\nWe were escorted to a reception area. We signed in and were then led to a small conference room. Jenna was allowed to go with the police officer, but Nana Jo and I were left to wait. I wanted to protest, but the look in Jenna's eyes convinced me silence was my best defense as well.\n\nStill flustered from the experience of being handcuffed and having guns pointed at me, I was glad for an opportunity to sit down. I hadn't realized how nervous I was until I poured myself a cup of water from the pitcher on the table and my hands shook so badly I spilled most of it on the table.\n\n\"Are you okay?\" Nana Jo grabbed some napkins from her purse and helped me clean up the water.\n\n\"No,\" I answered truthfully. \"But I will be. That was scary.\"\n\nNana Jo smiled. \"That was pretty nerve-racking. I'm sorry, honey.\"\n\n\"I'm glad you thought to leave your gun at home.\"\n\nShe smiled. \"I didn't.\"\n\n\"What?\"\n\nShe shook her head. \"Honestly, I was as surprised as that policeman. I must have left it at home, but it was an oversight. I was so upset about Dawson I didn't even think about my peacemaker.\"\n\n\"Lucky for us.\" I smiled and leaned across the table. \"I'm pleasantly surprised to know you have a permit to carry.\"\n\nNana Jo grinned. \"Well, we can thank Jenna for that too. To be honest, I've been carrying a gun for more years than you've been alive. But after everything that happened in the summer, Jenna convinced me I needed a permit.\"\n\nWe waited for what felt like an eternity but was only twenty minutes. Jenna returned with Detective Bradley Pitt. Detective Pitt had been the lead investigator in the murder of Clayton Parker, a realtor who was found in the backyard of my building over the summer. He was an unpleasant man with a knack of jumping to the wrong conclusion, like when he thought I murdered Parker. Detective Pitt was short with a bad comb-over and polyester pants that were too short and a bright, flowered polyester shirt that was too tight. His certainty that I was a murderer forced me, Nana Jo, and her friends from the retirement village to become sleuths to figure out who murdered Parker.\n\n\"Stinky Pitt, I should have known you'd be behind this debacle. Once again you've got everything bass-ackward, upside down sideways.\" Nana Jo taught Detective Pitt in elementary school and loved to embarrass him by using his childhood nickname.\n\nDetective Pitt's jaw clenched and his ears got red. \"I wish you would remember that no one calls me that anymore.\" He glared at Nana Jo, who contrived to look innocent.\n\nShe loved to goad him and knew exactly what she was doing. But she was careful never to call him Stinky Pitt around other police officers.\n\n\"Look. Dawson Alexander is absolutely not a killer,\" I said. \"You've arrested the wrong person.\"\n\n\"We haven't arrested anyone yet. We just brought him in for questioning.\" Detective Pitt walked around the small conference table. \"But, that's not to say we won't be pressing charges. We've barely had time to talk to him.\"\n\n\"And from now on, you won't be talking to him without legal counsel present,\" Jenna said. \"Now, I want to talk to my client.\"\n\nDetective Pitt looked as though he wanted to comment but, to his credit, he kept silent. He merely shook his head and mumbled something about lawyers meddling or muddling, I couldn't really tell, under his breath as he left.\n\n\"Wow. You're tough,\" I said with more than a little awe.\n\nJenna laughed. \"They don't call me pit bull for nothing. I earned that title.\"\n\nWe waited for several minutes and then the door opened and Detective Pitt returned with Dawson.\n\nDetective Pitt looked as though he intended to stay and listen, but Jenna wasn't having it.\n\n\"Thank you, Detective. I'll let you know when we're done.\"\n\nHis only response was to turn and leave, but the door did seem to close with a bit more force than I remembered him using previously.\n\nDawson looked as though he'd aged ten years since this morning. Could it only have been a few hours? His eyes looked tired and the scars that seemed faded this morning looked more prominent now; although I might have been more attuned to them, given our current situation.\n\n\"Dawson, I've told Detective Pitt I'm your legal counsel. However, you don't have to accept me. If there's someone else that you\u2014\"\n\n\"No. I really want you to represent me. I was just too embarrassed to ask.\" He hung his head and looked up sheepishly. \"I don't know how I'm going to pay you.\"\n\n\"Pshaw. Don't worry about that. I don't charge family.\"\n\nDawson looked surprised and misty-eyed.\n\nI was a bit misty myself. Dawson was like family. Leon and I were never blessed with children, but Dawson had come into my life during a time when I was in need of someone to focus my attention onto. He'd allowed me to mother him and had slid into one of the holes that Leon's death had opened up.\n\n\"Now, I need to know, what have you told them?\" Jenna looked at me and Nana Jo. \"Normally, I wouldn't do this in front of you. Conversations between a client and an attorney are privileged.\"\n\n\"That means you can't tell anyone what he says to you, right?\" I asked.\n\n\"Pretty much. It's complicated, but that's the general idea. Legal counsel is charged with giving the best advice possible. However, if someone comes to a lawyer for advice, they need to feel free to communicate everything without fear anything he says will be used against him. If he holds back, because he's afraid, I can't give the best advice.\" She looked at Dawson. \"Do you understand?\"\n\nHe nodded.\n\n\"Now, understand, only the conversation between an attorney and a client is privileged. If Sam and Nana Jo stay, they could be compelled to reveal it. That's why I would recommend they leave.\"\n\nNana Jo and I both started talking at the same time, but Dawson overrode us. \"It's okay. I didn't kill her. I don't have anything to hide. They can stay.\"\n\n\"I don't care what the law says. I'd never tell them anything,\" Nana Jo said.\n\n\"Neither would I.\"\n\nJenna merely shook her head. \"Am I the only law-abiding citizen in this family?\" She smiled. \"My family would apparently lie under oath.\" She shook her head.\n\n\"For someone I care about, I'd lie like a rug,\" I said.\n\n\"Darned straight,\" Nana Jo agreed. \"That's why we keep you and your husband, Tony, around. Two lawyers in the family come in pretty handy.\"\n\nJenna shook her head, then turned her attention to Dawson. \"I need you to tell me everything you've said to the police.\"\n\n\"I didn't really say anything. They kept me waiting in a room for almost an hour. Then Detective Pitt showed up. He started asking me a lot of questions, but I'd had a lot of time to think when I was waiting.\" He paused and then shook his head. \"My dad didn't teach me much, but he always said, 'Never say nothing to no cops, boy, not without a lawyer. They've gotta give you a lawyer in this country. Ain't America great?' That's what he would say.\" He looked around at us. \"So, I didn't say anything. I just said I wanted a lawyer.\"\n\nJenna breathed a sigh of relief.\n\n\"Attaboy,\" Nana Jo said.\n\nDawson smiled. \"I didn't think they'd do it. Detective Pitt kept saying I didn't need an attorney because I wasn't under arrest. When that didn't work, he said innocent people didn't need attorneys. If I wasn't guilty of anything, then I should want to help them.\" He looked at Jenna. \"I have to admit, I was starting to crack. If you hadn't come, I probably would have started talking.\"\n\nJenna looked as though she wanted to spit nails. She got up and started pacing around the small room. \"Why, that no-good dirtbag. I'll have his badge,\" she mumbled. After a few minutes, she sat down again and smiled at Dawson. \"I'm sorry you had that experience. In this respect, your dad was right. If you ask for an attorney, they are supposed to stop and immediately call for a public defender.\" She sighed. \"However, now on to business. Do you have a dollar?\"\n\nDawson looked puzzled but didn't question Jenna's request. He pulled out his wallet and took out a dollar and handed it to her.\n\nShe took the dollar. \"Thank you. This is my retainer. That means you are retaining me to represent you and be your lawyer. I'll write you a receipt and have you sign a document to that effect. Okay?\"\n\nDawson nodded.\n\n\"Okay. Now, you are not to talk to the police at all unless I'm with you. Understand?\"\n\nDawson nodded.\n\n\"I called your coach on my way here. He's aware of the situation. He doesn't know the university's position yet. But I'm guessing the university will want to distance themselves from you until this whole mess is cleared up. There's been so much negative publicity about football players and other athletes getting arrested, I'm sure the university counsel will recommend they take a neutral stance. But we'll deal with that hurdle when we get there.\"\n\nJenna pulled a notebook, tape recorder, and pen out from her briefcase. \"Normally, I wouldn't do things this way. But I need to know everything. Start from how you met Melody to today.\" She turned on the tape recorder.\n\nHe paused and took a couple of deep breaths before beginning his tale. \"I met Melody on campus. One day she came up to me in the quad and asked for my cell phone. When I gave it to her, she put her number in my contacts and handed the phone back. She told me to call her.\"\n\nNana Jo whistled.\n\n\"Shush. I'm willing to let you two stay, but you need to be quiet and let him finish,\" Jenna said.\n\nWe nodded.\n\nShe looked at Dawson. \"Go on.\"\n\n\"Well, she was hot and she was a senior and . . . she was really hot.\"\n\n\"We get the picture. She was hot and easy and you got involved. Is that right?\" Jenna asked.\n\nDawson nodded. \"Yeah. We were involved.\"\n\n\"How long?\"\n\n\"Only a couple of months. The season started in late August, and she came up to me in September.\"\n\nNana Jo made a sound that sounded like, harrumph. \"Figures. MISU was on a winning streak, and your picture was on the front page of the River Bend Times. She saw her chance to latch on to a meal ticket and she took it.\"\n\n\"Nana Jo, please.\" Jenna looked irritated. \"Stop interrupting.\"\n\n\"It's okay. She's right. At first I was flattered. Guys looked at me different when I walked around campus with Melody on my arm. Girls too. But she didn't really care about me. She only wanted to be seen with me. She just wanted to go to parties and have her picture taken. She wanted me to move out of my apartment.\" He glanced at me shyly. \"She went to the owner of Harbor Point Apartments and convinced him to rent the penthouse apartment to me.\"\n\n\"Harbor Point?\" Despite Jenna's warning, I couldn't stop myself from interrupting. \"Those units are really expensive. They look right out on Lake Michigan. The penthouse must cost a fortune.\"\n\n\"Normally, they lease for three thousand a month.\"\n\nNana Jo whistled, and I nearly choked.\n\nEven Jenna seemed surprised. \"How could you afford that?\"\n\n\"I can't. The owner is a big MISU fan and a friend of hers. She said he was willing to lease it to me for two hundred a month.\"\n\nJenna looked as though she could barely believe her ears. \"Two hundred? That's ridiculous. Sam could get more than two hundred a month for the garage studio. Why would he do that?\"\n\nDawson shrugged. \"I don't know, but it seemed shady. I didn't like the guy. He seemed slimy. He was older and wore polyester shirts with all these gold chains. He had really dark chest hair and big fake-looking hair that looked like a toupee. I just didn't trust him.\" Dawson looked down.\n\nAfter six months, I knew Dawson pretty well. Nana Jo and I exchanged glances. There was more to this. Jenna hadn't spent nearly as much time with Dawson as we had, but her instincts must have kicked in because she remained quiet and waited. Most people didn't recognize the power of silence and tried to fill it in quickly. As a former teacher, I can honestly say silence generated more results than anything else I'd ever said or done. It worked this time too.\n\n\"He reminded me of my dad. I knew there would be something in it for him later. One night I was playing pool with some friends by the old HOD.\"\n\n\"The HOD?\" Jenna stared. \"That trailer park owned by the House of David?\"\n\nDawson nodded.\n\nThe House of David was a religious commune that flourished in North Harbor during the early twentieth century. At one time, the area thrived with an amusement park, baseball stadium, and fruit and vegetable market. Practically all their businesses had closed long ago when their founder, Benjamin Purnell, was tried for fraud and accused of child molestation. The molestation charges were never proved, but the rumors did plenty of damage. Purnell died not long after the trial and the House of David split into two factions.\n\n\"I saw him there. Virgil Russell was at the bar, drinking.\"\n\nEither Dawson had learned to read my mind, or I'd let my thoughts show on my face, because he hurried to add, \"I wasn't drinking. I just like to go there and shoot pool. It's quiet. No one there talks football or knows who I am.\" He hung his head.\n\nI hadn't realized how much pressure he was under. I thought his biggest worry was keeping his grades up and staying on the team. I hadn't realized how much the pressure of the media and the fans was weighing on him. As I scanned his face now, I saw what I hadn't before.\n\n\"So, you saw this Virgil Russell at the pool hall,\" Jenna continued. \"Did he see you?\"\n\n\"No. I snuck out as soon as I saw him. But, he looked like he was waiting for someone. I don't know why, but I waited in the car until he came out. When he came out, he wasn't alone.\"\n\nDawson's voice got very soft. He was obviously reluctant to continue, but he took a couple of deep breaths and plowed forward. \"That's when I saw them. Melody and Virgil were together.\"\n\nJenna looked at me.\n\nI shrugged. Obviously she knew Virgil since she introduced Dawson to him. Again, my face must have revealed my confusion.\n\nDawson fidgeted and refused to make eye contact for several seconds. Then he looked at me. \"Don't you see, they were together.\"\n\nFinally, it dawned on all of us at the same time.\n\n\"It was disgusting. He had to be old enough to be her father. He had his hands all over her, and she was wrapped around him like a . . . like a . . .\" Dawson struggled to find the right simile to describe what he'd seen.\n\nNana Jo didn't have any trouble conjuring up the right comparison. \"Like an octopus.\"\n\n\"Yeah. That pretty much says it all.\"\n\nI studied Dawson's facial expressions and body language, and I knew there was more. He was holding something back. But I refused to entertain the thought he murdered that girl.\n\nJenna took a couple of deep breaths. \"Okay, so you saw your girlfriend with another man. Did that make you angry?\"\n\nDawson seemed to think about the question before answering, \"Maybe for a few seconds. But, honestly, I think I felt relieved.\"\n\n\"Relieved? Why relieved?\" Jenna asked.\n\n\"I knew things wouldn't work between Melody and me. I knew she didn't care about me. This gave me the excuse I needed to end things with her. And that's what I did. I broke it off.\"\n\n\"When was this?\"\n\nHe was silent for a few moments. \"Friday night, right after the pep rally.\"\n\n\"How did she take it?\"\n\nDawson rubbed his face. \"Not so good. At first, she tried to deny it was her. Then, when that wouldn't work, she said I was mistaken about their relationship. She claimed they were just friends.\" Dawson shook his head. \"She must think I was the biggest hayseed on the planet. There is no way I mistook their relationship when he had his hands all over her. He was groping her like a . . . like a . . .\"\n\n\"Like a blind man at a produce stand.\" Nana Jo again came to the rescue.\n\n\"Nana Jo.\" Jenna was not amused, and her voice said, either be quiet or you'll have to leave.\n\nNana Jo used her hands to indicate she was zipping her mouth shut and throwing away the key.\n\nJenna turned back to Dawson. \"Okay, so three days ago, you broke up with her. She didn't take it well. What happened next?\"\n\n\"Saturday was the football game. Later that evening, she came by the bookstore. She said she wanted to talk. I took her up to my apartment. We got into an argument.\"\n\n\"Did you hit her?\" Jenna asked.\n\nDawson shook his head. \"No. I never hit her. Although she hit me several times. She scratched me. I had to grab her wrists to protect myself.\" He held up his hands to show how he had grabbed her. \"She kicked and spit and lashed out with everything she had. I held her down on the sofa until she calmed down. Then I picked her up and put her out. She screamed and cussed and beat on the door for a while. I was afraid she'd wake up the whole neighborhood, but I never opened the door. She finally must have gotten tired and left. That was the last time I saw her.\"\n\n\"Sounds like she really made a big racket.\" Jenna looked at me. \"Did you hear it?\"\n\nI shook my head. \"No. I didn't hear a thing.\" I turned to Nana Jo. \"Did you?\"\n\nNana Jo shook her head.\n\nJenna sat and stared. \"Dawson, is there anything else you want to tell me?\"\n\nHe paused and eventually shook his head. \"No. That's everything.\"\n\n\"What about yesterday? Did you see her Sunday?\"\n\n\"No. I stayed home. I baked.\"\n\n\"That's right. I was there with him,\" I said eagerly.\n\n\"But you weren't there all day. You went to church with Mom yesterday. I know because she told me. You went to church and dinner and then shopping.\"\n\n\"Well, yeah, but he was home baking when I got home.\"\n\nJenna didn't look relieved. \"What about you?\" She turned to Nana Jo.\n\n\"Ruby Mae's granddaughter sang a solo at their church. I went to hear her and then I went to brunch with the girls.\"\n\nThe girls were Nana Jo's friends from the retirement village. They were feisty, active, and sweet each in their own way.\n\nJenna frowned. Then she got up and paced. \"I'm going to be honest. It doesn't look good. We need to find out when she died. The police will most likely arrest you.\"\n\nDawson looked terrified and, I have to admit, something clutched my chest that seemed to be restricting my airway and forcing tears to my eyes. \"But he's innocent.\"\n\n\"I know, but he has a really good motive. Plus, he had an altercation with the deceased. It's just a matter of time before they find Dawson's skin cells under her fingernails. Even a fool like Detective Stinky Pitt could get a conviction with that.\"\n\nThe thing clutching at my heart made it hard to speak. With effort, I managed to squeak out, \"But what are we going to do?\"\n\n\"I'm going to work on a defense.\"\n\nNana Jo stood. \"And we're going to figure out who killed that floozy.\"\nChapter 4\n\nIt was dark when we finally made it home. Jenna kicked us out hours earlier. She wanted to go over Dawson's testimony with him again without interruption before they talked to the police. Nana Jo and I waited for them in the waiting room. Three hours later, we saw Jenna on her way to the restroom. She didn't think they were going to charge Dawson today, but there were still hours of more questions. She suggested we go home, and she promised to call if there were future developments. I hadn't eaten much more than stale peanut butter crackers from the vending machine, and I was starving. Neither Nana Jo nor I felt like cooking, so we left and picked up a pizza on the way home.\n\nChristopher and Zaq kept things going at the bookstore while we were out. When we arrived, everything was clean and locked up tight. Crumbs on the rug in the kitchen and no other surprises told me Snickers and Oreo had been fed and let out to take care of business. I needed to remember to give my nephews each a bonus.\n\nNana Jo and I finished off an entire pizza that included, according to the menu, everything except the kitchen sink, along with a bottle of wine. Afterward, the lethargy hit and neither of us felt like talking. Before Nana Jo went to bed, she sent a text to the girls. We were scheduled to have dinner on Tuesday night at Randy's Steak House.\n\nMy body was exhausted, but I couldn't shut off my mind. I tossed and turned so much even Snickers decided the tidal wave was too much and hopped off my bed in exchange for her cozy little dog bed in the corner. Oreo was too excitable to be allowed to roam free at night. If he stepped on Snickers one time too many, he'd learn her bite was as bad as her growl. For his own safety, I crated him at night. When I finally gave up trying to sleep and turned on the light, Oreo barely glanced at me. Snickers got up, circled her bed three times, and laid down in a tight ball with her back to me. I grabbed my laptop and decided to force my mind to wind down. Escaping to the British countryside would be just the trick.\n\n\"A shame 'er ladyship 'as to entertain the likes of that American upstart?\" Mrs. McDuffie pursed her lips as though she'd just tasted something sour.\n\nThompkins, the Marsh family butler, stood erect and, without saying a word, looked with disapproval at the stout freckled housekeeper.\n\n\"Her ladyship is not one to shirk her duty.\" Thompkins looked down his long bony nose at the housekeeper.\n\n\"Well, o' course not.\" Mrs. McDuffie's face turned almost as red as her hair at the very idea anyone would imply she was criticizing her ladyship. Mrs. McDuffie might not be the most highly educated of servants, but loyalty to the Marsh family, and her ladyship in particular, she had in abundance. \"I never said she did.\"\n\nThompkins had shared the news of the hunting party with the other servants and asked if anyone had questions.\n\n\"'Ow many is comin'?\" Gladys, the latest addition to the household staff, asked softly. She was still relatively new and a bit in awe of the butler.\n\n\"Her ladyship said we should prepare for a weekend hunting party to include between twelve and fifteen guests.\" Thompkins removed an invisible speck of lint from his immaculate sleeve. \"The duchess wasn't exactly sure.\"\n\nMrs. McDuffie snorted. \"Not sure? 'Ow can she not know 'ow many people are comin' to 'er own bloomin' party?\"\n\nGladys and the two footmen had the decency to suppress their laughter. Millie and Flossie were day help and didn't have the same training.\n\nThompkins could remember a time when servants were a noble breed who took pride in a life of service to the great families of Britain. In his early days with the Marsh family, there was a large staff of more than fifty servants. Most lived on the grounds in the servants' quarters. Now there were only seven full-time servants who were live-in. Himself, Mrs. McDuffie the housekeeper, Gladys the housemaid, Mrs. Anderson the cook and her daughter, Agnes, the undercook, and Frank and Jim the footmen all lived on the grounds. The term footman was rather misleading. The two men weren't footmen in the traditional sense of the word. Basically, they helped with heavy lifting and did whatever was needed around the house and estate. Frank was the son of the groundskeeper and lived with his dad in the grounds keeper's cottage at the back edge of the property. The two new housemaids, Flossie and Millie, came in daily from the village. The Marsh family didn't entertain often, so the smaller staff saw to the family's basic needs. Thompkins used a temporary staffing service when additional help was needed, which thankfully wasn't often.\n\nHe looked at the staff waiting for his instructions and cast aside thoughts of the old days. Thompkins wasn't delusional. He knew the \"good old days\" weren't good for everyone, especially servants. Many servants were ill treated by their masters and poorly paid. They worked fourteen or more hour days and retired to tiny shared rooms where they roasted in the summer and froze in the winter. He'd grown up serving the Marsh family, and while the previous duke was a kind man, the conditions were less than ideal. Fewer servants meant everyone at Wickfield Lodge had their own room, something that would have been given to only the privileged few in days past. The wages were decent, modern conveniences made the work easier, and the Marshes treated their servants with respect, allowing them to have lives outside of service and encouraging them to better themselves through education. No, Thompkins didn't long for the way things were so much as he longed for the work ethic and pride in a job well done and the respect.\n\nFlossie looked at Thompkins in wide eyed delight. \"Mr. Thompkins, sir, do you know if Her Royal Highness will be bringing any servants, like a lady's maid? I'd be more than happy to\u2014\"\n\nMrs. McDuffie snorted. \"Bloody 'ell. 'Er Royal 'Ighness indeed. I'll not be bobbing and curtsying to that little American piece of\u2014\"\n\n\"Mrs. McDuffie.\" Thompkins, the normally calm, cool, and collected butler prided himself on always maintaining an even demeanor and not allowing any hint of emotion to show, trembled with the effort to maintain his calm. He took several deep breaths and regained his composure. He turned to the maid. \"You will address the duchess as Her Grace, or Duchess of Windsor, or simply as duchess. The king has not awarded the duchess the title of Her Royal Highness. We therefore shall not refer to her as such.\" Thompkins looked sternly at all the servants but lingered on Flossie, who turned red and dropped her gaze.\n\nFlossie was a good girl, obedient and well-mannered. Her biggest flaw was an affection for the cinema and American actresses. He had once caught her dancing around the kitchen, pretending she was Miss Ginger Rogers. He'd told Mrs. McDuffie, who gave her a stern talking to. She took the correction well, without any sulking, and he'd never caught her dancing again. With any luck, this tendency toward star worship was a phase she'd outgrow in time. He looked kindly at her now. Her demeanor was composed and respectful, but her eyes still held a spark which indicated she was still starstruck.\n\n\"I believe the duchess will bring her own maid, but I do not know about any other staff. I will meet with her ladyship later this afternoon and find out what the staffing needs are.\" Thompkins turned to the cook. \"Mrs. Anderson, her ladyship will want to go over the menu with you for the weekend. I believe the Duchess of Windsor is very concerned about her weight and some . . . modifications may be requested.\"\n\nMrs. Anderson sniffed but nodded her head. She was a good cook but could sometimes be a bit touchy about anyone who interfered with her reign over the kitchen. Even Thompkins walked a fine line when it came to the cook. He took a deep breath, relieved she had not taken offense at the request.\n\n\"Is that all?\" Mrs. McDuffie looked at the butler as she rose from the table.\n\nThompkins nodded.\n\n\"Then come along, girls. We better get busy airing out the bedrooms.\"\n\nMrs. McDuffie and the maids got up and headed up the back staircase to make sure all of the guest rooms were properly aired and ready for their guests.\n\nFrank and Jim stood and turned to Thompkins. Frank, tall, blond, and good-natured, was solid, with an athletic build. He was well liked, especially by the local girls, but was getting a reputation for his prowess on the rugby pitch.\n\nJim was also tall and athletic, but with more grace and panache. He too enjoyed rugby but was also a very good bowler on the regional cricket team.\n\n\"Sir, I was wondering if you want me to fetch me dad.\" Frank asked.\n\nFrank's father, Hyrum McTavish, had been the Marsh gamekeeper for the past fifty years and lived in a cottage on the property.\n\nThompkins was grateful he wouldn't have to make the long trek out to find the gamekeeper, who could be anywhere on the large estate, although Lord William mentioned he believed the man was checking on an injured muntjac fawn. Just as he was about to respond, Lady Elizabeth entered the room.\n\n\"M'lady.\" Thompkins stood straight and bowed his head slightly. He was happy to notice the two footmen were also standing at attention in a respectful manner.\n\n\"Thompkins, I'm so glad I found you. I just got off the phone with the Duchess of Windsor. Our earlier conversation was so hurried I didn't get to ask very many questions about the guests, and Lord William was particularly curious about the hunting.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth was usually very refined, but Thompkins couldn't help noticing she seemed annoyed.\n\n\"Yes, m'lady.\"\n\n\"Well, it turns out the gentlemen won't be hunting after all.\" She sighed. \"They want to shoot.\"\n\nThompkins understood her ladyship's annoyance. \"Excuse me, madam, but I thought . . .\"\n\n\"Yes, so did I. Lord Browning definitely said a hunting party and the duchess also said hunting. When I called, however, she talked about how much Count Rudolph was looking forward to the pheasant. That's when I realized we weren't talking about the same thing.\" She sighed. \"I guess it's one of those language differences between America and England. Apparently, hunting and shooting is the same thing in the States.\"\n\nThompkins scowled slightly but quickly removed all traces of distaste from his countenance and nodded. \"Very good, your ladyship. I was just about to send Frank out to notify his father about the hunting.\" He turned to Frank. \"Please inform Mr. McTavish to prepare for a shooting party. He can hire beaters and whatever additional help he will need.\" Thompkins turned to her ladyship, who nodded her approval of the orders.\n\nFrank nodded. \"Yes, sir.\"\n\nFrank and Jim nodded to her ladyship. They turned and left.\n\n\"Thompkins, I do hate springing this on you with such short notice. Please call the staffing agency and get whatever additional help is needed.\"\n\nThompkins nodded. \"Yes, m'lady.\" Thompkins coughed delicately. \"May I ask if the duchess had a firm idea of the number of guests we should expect?\"\n\n\"Oh, yes. I almost forgot. That was one of the main reasons I called.\" Lady Elizabeth handed Thompkins a list of names. \"These are the people that were invited.\"\n\nThompkins looked over the list. When he was done, he looked up.\n\n\"Yes. I know what you're thinking. I was as surprised as you are.\" Lady Elizabeth's brow creased, and her normally happy expression was replaced by one of worry. \"Lord William is furious. He's upstairs smoking at a furious pace.\" She sighed. \"Neither of us likes to dabble in politics, especially now. Things are so uncertain in Europe and the slightest misstep could send England spiraling into another world war.\"\n\n\"Perhaps it would be better to decline . . .\"\n\nLady Elizabeth sighed. \"I wish I could, but I've already said we would do it.\" Lady Elizabeth stood up straight and pushed her shoulders back. \"Besides, Lord Browning will be here. I don't believe he would have asked us to host the party unless it was vitally important. We shall just have to trust in providence and Lord Browning to keep an eye on things.\"\n\n\"Yes. M'lady.\"\n\nChapter 5\n\nI don't remember exactly what time I went to bed, but it was late. Normally, I dreaded the sound of my alarm clock. However, this morning, I awoke before it went off, thanks to the amazing aroma that infiltrated my room.\n\nI yawned and reached over to turn off my alarm and shuddered as Snickers licked me at just the right moment. I used my blanket to wipe off my tongue and the inside of my mouth and opened my eyes to find her inches from my face, awaiting another opportunity to clean my face. I sat up and scrubbed off my early morning dog kiss and hopped out of bed, eager to get dressed. Thanks to the glorious aroma of cinnamon rolls and coffee coming from my kitchen, I knew Dawson was home and my breakfast would consist of more than coffee and cold cereal.\n\nI'd never timed myself, but I suspected I could complete my morning routine 50 percent faster when I knew bacon or coffee was waiting for me. Showered and dressed, I hurried to let the poodles out so I could dig into breakfast and find out how Dawson was doing.\n\nNana Jo beat me to the kitchen and was perched on a barstool enjoying cinnamon deliciousness. I think I heard her moan as I passed.\n\nDawson placed a plate on the counter, along with a mug of steaming hot coffee. \"You eat. I'll take the dogs out.\"\n\nI didn't argue.\n\nDawson grabbed two dog biscuits from the canister on the counter and Snickers and Oreo followed him downstairs like lemmings. My poodles were loyal, but they would sell their souls for dog treats.\n\nNana Jo and I ate in peace until Dawson and the poodles returned.\n\n\"You look like you've been rode hard and put away wet.\"\n\nI kicked Nana Jo. \"Why don't you tell him what you really think?\"\n\n\"I'm not sure I know what that means, but I get the general idea.\" He smiled.\n\n\"How are you?\" I asked, although if the dark circles under his eyes and the haggard look of his face were any indication, he hadn't slept.\n\nHe confirmed my thoughts. \"I couldn't sleep, so I gave up and decided to make cinnamon rolls.\"\n\n\"They're delicious.\" I licked icing off my fingers.\n\n\"Thanks.\" He took a deep breath. \"I'm going to pack a bag and stay on campus. Mrs. Rutherford said I'll probably be arrested soon.\" He hung his head.\n\nI gasped and tried to stop the tears that came to my eyes from falling. \"But they can't. You didn't do it. Jenna knows that.\"\n\nHe held up a hand to stop my tirade. \"She does know it, and it means a lot to me that you believe in me.\"\n\n\"We both do,\" Nana Jo said.\n\nHe nodded. \"Thanks. But she said the case against me is pretty strong. There's a lot of circumstantial evidence and the district attorney wants to show the community he's tough on crime.\"\n\n\"Why that two-bit, lily-livered, attention grabbing, snake oil salesman,\" Nana Jo sputtered. \"He'd arrest an innocent man just to get his name in the paper. I've got half a mind to march down there and give that young whippersnapper a piece of my mind. I\u2014\"\n\nDawson held up both hands. \"Whoa. Hold on there, Mrs. T.\" Dawson fought back a smile. \"I appreciate the sentiment, but I don't think making the district attorney mad is going to help.\"\n\n\"He's right. As much as I hate to admit it, he's just doing his job.\"\n\nNana Jo wasn't one to go down without a fight. \"No, he isn't. His job isn't to arrest innocent people. His job should be to get to the truth. I guess that's just too much for those pea brains.\"\n\nSomething Dawson said had been niggling at the back of my mind. \"Wait, why are you going to stay on campus? I don't understand.\"\n\nHe avoided eye contact. \"If I'm going to be arrested, I think it would be better someplace else.\"\n\nAt first I thought he was saying he would be embarrassed if Nana Jo and I were there to see him arrested by the police, but something in his eyes told me there was more to the story. \"Dawson, I can't lie and say it wouldn't make me sad to see you arrested. But knowing you're innocent makes it easier. If you're worried about me and Nana Jo, please don't be. We're a lot tougher than we look.\"\n\n\"Darned straight,\" Nana Jo added.\n\nDawson still avoided eye contact and shuffled his feet around. \"It wouldn't look very good for the bookstore to have one of your employees arrested.\"\n\nI got up and walked around the counter and lifted his head so he looked me in the eyes. \"Dawson, I appreciate your concern, but I don't give a flying fig what people think. This is your home and you don't have to leave it for fear of what people might say.\"\n\nHis eyes filled with water, and he looked like he wanted to say something but wasn't able to find the right words.\n\nI gave him a hug, and he put his head on my shoulder and wept.\n\nWe stood there for several moments and then he stood up straight and wiped his face with a dishcloth. \"Thank you, Mrs. W. Thank you both.\"\n\nNana Jo had been weeping into a handkerchief. She wiped her eyes and blew her nose. \"Now that we've gotten that off our chests, it's time to get busy. If the authorities won't figure out who killed that . . . girl, well, then, I guess we'll just have to do it for them.\" She took another sip of her coffee.\n\nAs much as I hated to admit it, Nana Jo was right. Jenna would do everything she could to protect Dawson legally. However, the police and Detective Pitt weren't going to look for another murderer when there was so much evidence against Dawson. Unless we stepped in and found the killer, an innocent man would go to jail.\n\nThe rest of the day went by in a daze. My mind was only half engaged on books. The other half of my brain scrambled to think through what I knew about Melody Hardwick. Several months ago, when the realtor who listed this building for sale was killed in the back courtyard and the police thought I was the murderer, Nana Jo and her friends from the retirement village helped me find the real killer. The girls used their vast collection of family and friends to get information to solve the crime. I wondered, was it merely luck that helped us put the pieces together or could we do it again. We were scheduled to meet for dinner tonight, so time would tell.\n\nTuesday was Senior Citizen's Day at Randy's Steak House. Half-priced meals, at least for my grandmother and her friends, had become a ritual. The host knew us by name. I was only in my thirties and didn't qualify for the discounted meal, but I racked up frequent diner points and was only one meal away from a free dinner.\n\n\"Alright, ladies. You know why we're here. Let's get this party started.\" Nana Jo took one last bite of her hot banana pudding and pulled her iPad out of her purse. \"Why don't I start?\" She looked around and saw no opposition. \"I called Freddie and filled him in on the situation.\"\n\n\"He's a hottie, that Freddie. I'd sure like to fill him in on a thing or two.\" Irma Starczewski broke into a coughing fit. Irma was a petite woman in her mid-eighties. Her voice was deep and raspy from decades of chain-smoking and she had a mouth like a sailor.\n\nNana Jo looked over her glasses and down her nose at Irma. \"I'll bet you would. Fortunately, he has better taste. Now, if I may be allowed to continue.\"\n\nIrma stuck her tongue out before another coughing spell hit. She looked around discreetly, then pulled a flask out of her purse, and took a swig.\n\n\"As you all know, Freddie's son, Mark, is on the state police. He said the little gold digger had a record a mile long, and Melody Hardwick wasn't her real name.\"\n\n\"Nana Jo. Just because you never liked Melody . . . or whatever her name was, doesn't mean we want to jump to conclusions. We have to try and be as open-minded and fair as possible.\"\n\nNana Jo looked at me with the innocence of a babe. \"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm merely reporting the facts.\"\n\nI smiled. \"So, you're telling me Mark really called her a 'gold digger'?\"\n\n\"Well, I might have added that bit myself, but you're missing the important part. Melody Hardwick isn't her name.\"\n\n\"I wonder if Dawson knew.\" I looked at Nana Jo, who shrugged.\n\n\"Are you going to tell us what her real name is? I've got a hot date tonight with a guy who used to work at MISU and I intend to ask about her.\" Dorothy Clark was six foot, three hundred pounds, and looked like a linebacker for the Chicago Bears. She was also a helpless flirt with a black belt in aikido. She had a way with men and they melted at her feet. She could give classes. If there was any information to be gotten out of her date, I had no doubt Dorothy would get it.\n\nNana Jo scanned her iPad. \"Elizabeth Mae Simpson.\"\n\nDorothy took a pen and wrote the name on a napkin and passed it to Irma and Ruby Mae.\n\n\"Apparently she used different aliases too. Beth, Lizzy, Bessie. Twenty-two, brown hair, brown eyes, and one hundred fifteen pounds.\"\n\n\"What did she get arrested for?\" Ruby Mae pulled her knitting out of the bag she always carried. Ruby Mae was my favorite of Nana Jo's friends. She was a soft-spoken African-American woman. I thought she was in her eighties, although her skin was so smooth it was hard to tell. She was born and raised in Alabama and she spoke with a southern accent, even though she'd spent most of her adult life in Chicago, where she single-handedly raised her nine children after her husband walked out on them.\n\n\"He called her a grifter,\" Nana Jo said.\n\nRuby Mae frowned. \"What's a grifter?\"\n\n\"I googled it and, I quote, 'a grifter is a con artist who swindles people out of their money through fraud.' \"\n\n\"Well, I'll be d\u2014\"\n\n\"Irma!\" everyone yelled.\n\n\"Sorry.\" Irma put her hand over her mouth and burst into a coughing fit.\n\n\"Sounds like that little girl was up to no good.\" Ruby Mae knitted. \"Looks like our boy, Dawson, dodged a bullet.\" Ruby Mae looked up from her knitting. \"I'm sorry. Poor choice of words.\"\n\n\"We know what you meant.\" Nana Jo patted Ruby Mae's hand. \"And for the record, I agree. He definitely dodged a bullet.\"\n\n\"What about the other guy you told us about?\" Dorothy asked.\n\nNana Jo put her reading glasses back on and went back to her iPad. \"Oh, yeah. Virgil Russell. Mark didn't have time to look him up.\"\n\n\"I've got a call into my great-grandson, Ernie. He's a realtor. He knew about this Virgil Russell person. He's a bad mother\u2014\"\n\n\"Irma!\"\n\n\"Sorry. Ernie says he's a slumlord.\"\n\n\"Did he have any details?\" Nana Jo typed into her iPad.\n\nIrma coughed. \"I'm having lunch with him tomorrow. He said he'd ask some of his associates. I'm sure he'll have some information for me.\"\n\n\"Great.\" I was always amazed at how quickly these ladies could spring into action and tap into their connections to get information.\n\n\"How is Dawson holding up?\" Ruby Mae asked.\n\nI got teary eyed, but now was no time for weakness. We had a job to do. I took a deep breath and told them what Dawson told us this morning.\n\nRuby Mae sniffed and dabbed her eyes. Irma swore under her breath before breaking into another coughing spell that required a swig from her flask. Dorothy looked stoic and determined.\n\n\"Well, things don't look good, but we can help. We need to get as much information as possible.\" Nana Jo spoke like a general rallying her troops.\n\n\"I'm going to call Jenna,\" I said. \"I'm hoping she can tell us whether the autopsy is done. There might be some useful information in there.\"\n\n\"Good idea.\" Nana Jo typed. \"I'm going to check with Freddie and see if there is anything else Mark can tell us about Virgil and his business dealings.\"\n\n\"My granddaughter, Jillian, goes to MISU,\" Dorothy said. \"I don't know if she knew Melody or Elizabeth Mae.\"\n\n\"I think it'll be easier if we continue to refer to her as Melody.\" I glanced around and received nods from everyone. \"It'll be less confusing.\"\n\n\"Good. I'll ask my granddaughter about Melody. If she didn't know her, maybe she knows someone who did,\" Dorothy said.\n\n\"Sam, I can see your wheels turning,\" Nana said.\n\nShe knew me so well. \"I'm going to the campus too. I want to talk to the athletic director about Dawson.\" I looked down. \"It would be horrible if he lost his scholarship because of this. I thought I'd go to the student center and look around too.\"\n\nNana Jo stared. \"What for?\"\n\nI took a moment to formulate my thoughts. \"Remember when that foreign exchange student drowned in the Thomas River last year? There was a memorial service on campus. Lots of students came together and set up a makeshift memorial with flowers and keepsakes.\"\n\n\"I remember. The newspapers and television cameras interviewed all those kids,\" Dorothy said. \"There were some really sad stories about his life in Kenya and how his family had such high hopes for him.\"\n\n\"I was thinking there might be something like that for Melody. If so, maybe I could talk to some of her friends, find someone who knew her really well.\"\n\nNana Jo nodded. \"Good idea.\"\n\n\"Well, it looks like we have a plan of attack.\" Dorothy started to rise. \"I've got to get ready for my date.\"\n\n\"Just one more thing,\" Nana Jo said. \"We've got to work fast on this one.\"\n\nWe all looked at Nana Jo with puzzled expressions.\n\n\"MISU has a bye week this Saturday, but if we're going to a bowl game, we need to clear Dawson before the next game.\"\nChapter 6\n\nAfter dropping Nana Jo and the girls at the retirement village, I swung by Jenna's house. My sister and brother-in-law were both successful attorneys who chose to live in North Harbor, rather than in a South Harbor McMansion. At one time, North Harbor was the place where the elite showed off their wealth, with large Victorian mansions set back from the street with expansive lawns behind wrought iron fences. When the lucrative automotive jobs moved south, so, too, did the wealthy. Those who stayed left their older homes and moved to working-class South Harbor.\n\nJenna and Tony bought an older, dilapidated Victorian mansion for one dollar from the city and lovingly and painstakingly renovated it. The house was large, at close to four thousand square feet but felt warm and cozy inside. My sister turned the front turret into her home office with a curved desk and one of the house's seven fireplaces; it was a cozy space which overlooked a lovely rose garden. When I pulled in front of the house, the light in the turret showed my sister at her desk. Jenna must have seen me. By the time I climbed to the top of the porch, she was waiting with the door open.\n\n\"Come in.\"\n\nI laid my purse on the table inside the door and followed my sister into her office. \"Where are Tony and the twins?\"\n\n\"Tony had to work late and the twins went to a poetry reading.\"\n\nI must have looked as surprised as I felt because Jenna laughed.\n\n\"I know. I was as surprised as you look. Quincy Troupe is doing a reading and they have dates.\"\n\n\"Ah . . . okay, that explains it.\"\n\nI didn't read a lot of poetry, but I was familiar with Quincy Troupe. He wrote a biography on jazz musician Miles Davis and a poem about former basketball hall of famer, Magic Johnson. If the twins went to a poetry reading, Quincy Troupe would be the poet.\n\nShe returned to her chair behind her desk, and I sat on the Victorian love seat we'd picked up at a yard sale and she'd reupholstered. Every time I saw that love seat, I smiled at the memory of Jenna and I trying to cram it into the back of my SUV without damaging it more than time and generations of wear and tear already had. The ornately carved mahogany wood with its overstuffed velvet seat, tufted back, and rolled arms wasn't my taste, but it fit the house and room perfectly.\n\n\"I would ask what brings you here, but I'm sure I can guess.\"\n\n\"I just came from dinner with Nana Jo and the girls. Any updates?\"\n\nShe looked at the papers on her desk. \"Things don't look good.\" She picked up a file. \"She was strangled.\"\n\n\"Do they know how?\"\n\n\"Based on the bruising, the killer probably used his hands.\"\n\n\"Which means . . . ?\"\n\nJenna nodded. \"It was probably a man or a very strong woman.\"\n\n\"When?\"\n\n\"The coroner believes her death occurred between midnight and two thirty Monday morning. Dawson claims she banged on his door until midnight, although the police won't take his word for that.\"\n\n\"Does the medical report say anything else useful?\"\n\nJenna shook her head. \"Not really. She'd eaten last around eight.\" Jenna scanned the document. \"She had sex with someone within the past day. The police are going to want a DNA sample from Dawson.\"\n\n\"He was her boyfriend. That doesn't mean he killed her.\"\n\nJenna looked down. \"No, but once we give the DNA sample, they'll know it's his skin cells under her fingernails and only Dawson's word for it she was alive afterward.\" She nodded. \"They'll arrest him.\"\n\nI took several deep breaths to steady my breathing.\n\n\"I'm going to take Dawson tomorrow for the cheek swab. We'll wait downtown. Most likely, they'll arrest him shortly afterward. The district attorney was a classmate of mine. He's not the sharpest tack in the box, but he's no fool and owes me a favor. We'll have a bond hearing tomorrow afternoon.\"\n\n\"Do you need any money?\"\n\nShe shook her head. \"No. I've got a bail bondsman I work with a lot. He's going to take care of everything.\"\n\nNo matter how much I blinked, I couldn't stop the tears from streaming down my face.\n\nJenna reached behind her desk and pulled a box of tissues from a shelf and brought them to me.\n\nI took the tissue, wiped my eyes, and blew my nose.\n\n\"Sam, I'm sorry. I know how much Dawson means to you, but I want you to be prepared. This is going to get worse before it gets better.\"\n\nI looked up. \"What do you mean?\"\n\nJenna paced. \"The media have already started calling. They'll show up at your bookstore and stick microphones and cameras in your face. Some may try to follow you. I can prevent them from entering, but I can't prevent them from setting up their cameras outside on the street. I recommend you don't make a statement. Let me handle all of that.\"\n\nI nodded. \"Is there anything we can do?\"\n\n\"Yeah. Find out as much as you can about her. Normally, I work with an investigator, but he's knee-deep in other higher-priority cases.\" Jenna smiled at me. \"Besides, I'm pretty sure even if I told you to stay out of it, you wouldn't.\"\n\nI smiled. \"You're right.\"\n\nJenna looked serious. \"Sam, be careful. There's a murderer out there. Don't go off on your own. Normally I don't condone guns, but Nana Jo should keep her 'peacemaker' ready. Whoever murdered Melody thinks he's gotten away with it. He won't take kindly to anyone who gets too close.\"\n\n* * *\n\nJenna's words stuck with me throughout my drive home. At home, I let Snickers and Oreo out and stood in the courtyard and watched while they sniffed for the appropriate places to do their business. I noticed Dawson's light on in his apartment. I found that light comforting and couldn't help wondering how many more times I'd see it. The tears started again, and I had to shake myself to prevent a breakdown.\n\nWhen I went back inside, my mind was restless and I knew sleep would be elusive. I avoided the struggle and distracted myself with a trip to the British countryside.\n\nThompkins entered the library of Wickfield Lodge and stood very stiff and straight in the doorway. He coughed and then announced, \"The Duke of Kingfordshire, Lord James FitzAndrew Browning.\"\n\nJames entered the library.\n\n\"Excellent. You're just in time for tea.\" Lady Elizabeth looked to the butler, who nodded, stepped back, and closed the door.\n\nJames was a freckled, fair haired, good natured man with broad shoulders and a stocky build. The Marshes met him six months ago when he came to help his longtime friend Victor Carlston avoid swinging for a murder he didn't commit. After the real killer was apprehended, he was best man at the wedding of Victor and Lady Penelope Marsh. Since then, he'd made many visits to Wickfield Lodge and had become very attentive to Lady Daphne.\n\n\"James, I'm so glad you've finally come. Now maybe you can tell us what this whole thing's about,\" Lord William announced in his loud, but good natured tone.\n\nLady Elizabeth shot a glare at her husband. Lord William frowned and pulled out his pipe.\n\nLady Elizabeth waited and watched.\n\nJames glanced at Daphne sitting in the window seat. He strode across the room to her and reached down for her hand.\n\nDaphne nodded, gave a brief smile that didn't reach her eyes, extracted her hand, and returned to the view out the window.\n\nLady Elizabeth noted her niece's cold greeting and added more warmth into her voice. \"James, we're all so glad you've arrived.\"\n\nThompkins rolled in a tea trolley filled with tea, sandwiches, scones, and tarts. He rolled the cart be side Lady Elizabeth and bowed.\n\n\"Wonderful, Thompkins. Thank you,\" Lady Elizabeth said to the retreating figure, then grabbed the silver teapot and poured. \"James dear, would you like tea or perhaps you'd prefer something stronger?\"\n\nJames accepted the teacup. \"No, tea will be fine. Thank you.\" He looked over at Daphne before taking a sip.\n\nOnce the tea was distributed, Lady Elizabeth turned to James. \"Now, maybe you can tell us what you've gotten us into?\"\n\nHe took a deep breath and placed his cup on the table. \"First, I want to thank you for agreeing to host the duchess's hunting party. We were at our wits' end trying to figure out what to do.\"\n\n\"Of course we're happy to help out, but it seems so strange,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\nLord James nodded. \"I dare say it does.\" He paused. \"I appreciate your trust, but I'm afraid I must ask you to trust me a little longer.\" He looked at Lady Daphne, who was engrossed in her cup of tea and didn't make eye contact with him.\n\n\"Unfortunately, I can't put forward an explanation, at least not yet. I hope to be able to explain at some point, but I can't right now. In fact, I must ask that you not even mention the fact I rung up to ask. It's imperative the Duchess of Windsor not know I had any involvement in this. As far as she or anyone else outside the family is concerned, I'm merely an invited guest, a friend of the family.\" James looked again at Daphne.\n\nLady Elizabeth stared in puzzled amazement. \"But how can she not know? I mean, I've never even met Wallace before. Surely someone had to suggest Wickfield Lodge as an alternative location. I can't believe she came up with the idea on her own.\"\n\n\"Ah . . . that. Well, all I can say is someone the duchess respects suggested the location. The fact that you're a favorite cousin of the king and could prove beneficial in smoothing the way with her royal relations was an additional enticement.\" James smiled briefly. \"However, I can't stress enough how important this is.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth looked to her husband, who puffed on his pipe and absentmindedly fed bits of his sandwich to Cuddles, sitting attentively at his feet.\n\nJames looked uncharacteristically nervous. The 15th Duke of Kingfordshire always exuded a casual, easygoing manner, common for young men of his station. A wealthy, privileged, aristocrat without a care in the world was the image he presented. However, closer inspection showed intelligence, a keen mind, a purposeful chin, and a determined jaw. If eyes were the window to the soul, then his soul showed a depth of conviction and courage.\n\nLady Elizabeth nodded her ascent.\n\n\"Dashed secretive.\" Lord William looked from his wife to his niece. After a pause, he nodded.\n\nAttention turned toward Daphne. Lady Daphne sat in her favorite seat in front of the large picture window that looked out onto the back terrace. Framed by the large window, she gazed outside. The sun shone through the window and illuminated her beauty with a brilliance that was dazzling. Golden hair and piercing blue eyes which sparkled like the sun on the ocean in the early summer. She was stunning. She turned her head toward James and lifted her long dark lashes. Her glacial gaze caused Lord James to gasp and Lady Elizabeth shivered involuntarily.\n\n\"What are you asking?\" Her words hung in the air like a cloud of smoke.\n\nLady Elizabeth placed her teacup on the table and stood. \"Darling, I think we need to have another talk with the servants.\" She picked up the knitting bag she kept at her feet.\n\nLord William stared after his wife.\n\n\"Are you coming, dear? I really think we both need to talk to them.\"\n\nAfter a few moments, Lord William's eyes registered the secret message his wife was sending and hoisted himself from the sofa, dislodging Cuddles, and followed his wife to the door, mumbling, \"Servants, yes. Have to talk to the servants. Tricky business.\"\n\n\"Wait,\" Daphne said. \"There's no need for you both to leave. His Grace can't have anything to say to me that can't be said in front of both of you.\"\n\nHis Grace looked as though he had a lot he'd like to say. However, he set down his teacup and walked to the seat next to Daphne.\n\nDaphne turned to face him and an invisible veil immediately closed over her eyes and provided a barrier to her thoughts.\n\n\"Daphne, I think you know I care about you deeply. The past few months have been rather busy and I apologize for not being more attentive. However, my feelings are\u2014\"\n\n\"Oh, dear.\" Daphne laughed. \"I think you've mistaken me. I wasn't asking you for a profession of love. We both know that would be phony.\"\n\nJames snapped back as though he'd been slapped.\n\n\"I was merely asking how far you want to go with this charade you've arranged. Are you merely an old family friend, my brother in law's dearest friend? Or are you supposed to mean something to the family.\"\n\n\"Daphne.\" Lady Elizabeth couldn't stop the shock that registered in her voice.\n\nDaphne looked innocently at her aunt. \"I'm sorry if I shocked you, Aunt Elizabeth. I was merely trying to determine how much of an actress my part required.\"\n\nJames's eyes flashed and his jaw clenched. \"I wouldn't want to tax your acting ability. Let's just say I'm a friend of the family.\"\n\n\"Fine with me.\" Daphne turned back to her window.\n\n\"Fine.\" James stood and took his pipe from his pocket and moved to the mantle.\n\nLady Elizabeth and Lord William looked at the two young people and then quietly slipped out of the room.\n\nVictor and Penelope walked the three miles from their home to join the family for dinner, which helped to remove some of the strain.\n\nDaphne and James were excessively kind on the rare instances when they spoke to each other, which increased, rather than decreased, the tension. Daphne also showed a deep interest in all of the details of Penelope's housekeeping dilemmas, even going so far as to offer to help interview maids. For his part, James remained in a daze. He was silent, only speaking when spoken to. After dinner, the family retired to the back parlor for coffee.\n\nLady Elizabeth pulled out her knitting and looked around. She gazed at her niece Lady Penelope and smiled. After nearly four months of marriage, it was obvious the couple was blissfully happy. Victor had believed himself to be in love with the fair and beautiful Daphne for most of his young life. Six months ago he'd realized Penelope was his heart's true desire. Lady Elizabeth glanced at her new nephew with fondness.\n\nVictor sat in a chair in front of the fireplace with his legs outstretched, completely at home. He smoked while Lord William reminisced about his days in His Majesty's service. Knowing glances were exchanged between Victor and James. Daphne retreated to her seat by the window and engrossed herself in a magazine. However, Lady Elizabeth was sure she hadn't seen her turn a page in nearly thirty minutes.\n\nPenelope leaned toward her aunt and whispered, \"What's with the Ice Queen?\" She inclined her head slightly toward her sister.\n\nLady Elizabeth sighed. \"She's hurt. I think she genuinely cares for James.\"\n\nPenelope glanced across at her younger sister. The two young ladies were so different; a casual observer wouldn't have guessed they were sisters. Daphne was petite, fair skinned with blond hair and blue eyes; traits she inherited from her father, Peregrine Marsh. Penelope looked more like their mother, with dark hair and eyes. In the summer, if she wasn't careful, her skin tanned to a dark brown, very similar to their mother, Lady Henrietta Pringle. The loving couple died in a car accident not long after Daphne was born. Lord William and Lady Elizabeth raised the two girls and couldn't help looking upon them as the daughters they never had.\n\n\"I believe James genuinely cares for her too.\" Penelope glanced at the duke. \"What happened?\"\n\nLady Elizabeth placed her knitting on her lap. \"He hasn't been around much in the past couple of months. Then he comes and, after arranging this elaborate weekend, he doesn't confide in her what's going on.\"\n\n\"Maybe he can't.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth looked at her niece. \"I was hoping he'd confided to Victor?\"\n\nPenelope shook her head. \"If he has, Victor hasn't said, but I'm sure he wouldn't have asked you to do it if it wasn't important. I've never seen his estate, but according to Victor, James's family home makes Buckingham Palace look like a nice cottage. If it was just a matter of needing a large estate for the shooting, he certainly could have hosted it himself.\"\n\n\"He doesn't want anyone to know he is anything more than an invited guest, a family friend.\" Lady Elizabeth frowned.\n\n\"What's the matter? You seem upset.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth knitted a few stitches. \"I just have a very bad feeling about this whole thing. After seeing the guest list, I have to say, if anyone other than James had asked me to do this, I would most certainly have declined. Your uncle hates getting involved in politics, and there's been so much negative publicity about people like the Cliveden set in the papers that I'm worried.\"\n\nPenelope scowled. \"The Cliveden set?\"\n\n\"You know, dear, that group Lady Nancy Astor invites to Cliveden House. The newspapers have been full of how they are trying to appease Hitler and, well, all kinds of things.\"\n\n\"I've read about them, but I'm rather surprised you have.\"\n\n\"One must stay up on current events.\" Lady Elizabeth knitted. \"It's so distressing. I don't know what's worse. To think we could be so close to war again\"\u2014she stopped knitting and looked at her niece\u2014\"or to sit back and do nothing while Germany takes over Europe. If he's left unchecked, he won't stop at the Channel.\"\n\nPenelope reached across and patted her aunt's hand. \"I pray it doesn't come to that. But, try not to worry. This is just a weekend shooting party and Victor and I'll be here as much as possible. We'll help in any way we can.\"\n\nTry as she might, Lady Elizabeth couldn't shake off the feeling in the pit of her stomach of trouble ahead. She could tell she was upsetting her niece, so she smoothed the frown creasing her forehead and smiled. \"Thank you, dear. I know it will be a tremendous help.\" She then turned to the others in the room. \"Would anyone care for more coffee?\"\n\nChapter 7\n\nI'd always loved Wednesdays, especially when I was a teacher. My coworkers started the week looking forward to Friday and the weekend. That meant five whole days of classes and grading papers. If I focused on Wednesday, instead of Friday, the week went much faster. This Wednesday changed that forever. This Wednesday, Dawson submitted to a DNA check and then waited patiently for the police to arrest him, which they did.\n\nI was determined to be strong and not permit myself to cry. I didn't want to make things worse for him by breaking down. I was the last thing he needed to worry about. I closed the bookstore so Nana Jo and I could go to the police station with Dawson and Jenna.\n\nFirst, Jenna took Dawson to the North Harbor Clinic, where he was escorted to a private room.\n\n\"Why are you having this done here? I thought the police took care of this,\" I asked while we sat in the waiting room.\n\n\"The state lab is backlogged. It'll take them at least six months before they get to us.\"\n\n\"Wouldn't that be better? I mean, they can't arrest him without the DNA evidence, can they?\"\n\n\"Oh, yes they can. Plus, I don't want to take the chance the state loses or contaminates the sample. They have some good people, but they're overworked, and when you're overworked, mistakes happen. Besides, I work with this lab all the time. They'll have the results back in a few hours.\"\n\n\"But in six months, we will have figured out who the killer is.\"\n\nJenna turned to face me. \"Sam, murder is a felony. If Dawson is arrested for a felony, he'll be suspended until his case is resolved. Trust me. I would prefer more time too, but ultimately the decision is his.\"\n\nHe returned before we could discuss things further. The entire process took less than ten minutes.\n\nI followed Jenna and Dawson to the police station and thought over what Jenna said. Six months wasn't a long time, but faced with less than two weeks to find a killer, it seemed like an eternity. Football meant a lot to Dawson. It was the vehicle that enabled him to get away from his abusive father and to get a good education.\n\nThis time Nana Jo had her gun, but she stopped at the metal detectors and held up her carry permit. She also announced loudly she was packing an iPad in her purse. The police officer manning the metal detector remembered us from two days earlier and didn't look amused. He looked through her purse carefully and handed back her wallet and purse and ushered us through. Our entry was unheralded and low-key.\n\nJenna notified Detective Pitt we were coming beforehand and he waited for us at the desk.\n\nMy sister was bossy, opinionated, and annoying. She was also hardworking, dedicated, and super organized. These skills came in handy as an attorney. To minimize the amount of time Dawson sat in a jail cell, she had reviewed the judge's schedule and talked to the district attorney. Dawson was arrested, fingerprinted, photographed, and arraigned all before three. The bail bondsman was good to his word and waited for us at the courthouse. By three thirty, we were back at the bookstore. Dawson hadn't slept well last night, so he made pie dough. Not my idea of fun, but to each his own.\n\nJenna, Nana Jo, Dawson, and I sat at one of the bistro tables in the back of the store, drank coffee, and ate apple pie \u00e0 la mode, drizzled with salted caramel. It was a delicious muddled mixture of warm spicy comfort which almost buried my sadness. For several minutes, we sat and ate in silence. It was a glorious few minutes.\n\n\"That pie was great. You could enter a baking contest.\" Nana Jo licked her spoon.\n\nThe tips of Dawson's ears were red. He still got embarrassed when people complimented him, even though he loved to watch people enjoying his creations.\n\n\"What happens now?\" I asked Jenna.\n\n\"Dawson's officially suspended from school.\"\n\n\"Looks like you'll have plenty of time to bake.\" Nana Jo patted his shoulder.\n\n\"Is there a way he can get his assignments?\" I asked Jenna. \"Nana Jo and I can tutor him so he doesn't fall behind when he goes back in a couple of weeks.\"\n\nJenna smiled at me. \"That's a great idea.\"\n\nDawson looked misty eyed. He looked like he wanted to say something but couldn't find the words. Eventually, he stared at his plate and mumbled, \"Thank you.\"\n\n\"So what are your plans for today?\" Jenna asked.\n\n\"I'm going to the campus.\" I looked at my watch. \"I better get a move on.\"\n\nJenna looked very serious. \"Sam, I know I don't have to tell you this, but there may be reporters there. It would be best if you leave all of the comments to the press to me.\"\n\n\"Don't worry. I have no intention of talking to anyone from the media.\"\n\nWe both turned to stare at Nana Jo.\n\n\"What're y'all looking at me for?\" She looked indignant.\n\n\"Nana Jo, this is important. I\u2014\"\n\n\"I know. I know.\" She zipped her lips and folded her arms over her chest.\n\nJenna sighed. \"I'm not trying to insult you. I know you would never do or say anything to deliberately hurt Dawson or our case. But the media can turn your words inside out and before you know it, we've got a big media mess on our hands. We need all of the goodwill and public opinion we can get.\"\n\nAt that moment, Jenna's phone rang. While she was answering, Nana Jo got a text message. Then Dawson's phone rang.\n\nJenna listened to the caller for a few seconds and then her face underwent a transformation. She went from relaxed to panicked in less than five seconds. \"Turn on the television. Quick!\"\n\nI didn't have a television downstairs in the bookstore, so we hurried upstairs.\n\nAt the top of the stairs, Jenna said, \"Turn on the news.\"\n\nI grabbed the remote and turned to one of the local news stations. I couldn't help but gasp at what I saw on the screen.\n\nStanding atop the courthouse stairs was A-squared, Alex Alexander, Dawson's father. There were at least three microphones shoved in his face. Greasy hair, dirty jeans I felt sure were once blue, and a faded-out, greasy shirt that read, BEAM ME UP, SCOTTY. THERE'S NO INTELLIGENT LIFE DOWN HERE.\n\n\"Turn it up,\" Jenna demanded.\n\nNana Jo and I exchanged glances, but I complied. We'd run into Dawson's father before when he broke into the bookstore. The last time I saw him, he was handcuffed and getting into the back of a police car.\n\n\"Police brutality and discrimination, that's what this is. My boy didn't kill that girl. The cops is trying to frame him. They don't like it when a local boy gets a chance to make it outta this hellhole of a town. They just wanna push you back down,\" A-squared ranted.\n\nOne of the reporters tried to steer the conversation into something more productive than the current tirade. \"Mr. Alexander, there's a lot of evidence against your son. How can you be so sure he didn't kill her? Have you talked to him?\"\n\n\"Nawh, I ain't talked to him. I been in jail. Just got out. Don't need to talk to him. I know he didn't kill nobody, specially not that little tramp. Fine piece of [bleep]. But that's all she was.\" He made a hawking noise and then spit something brown on the ground.\n\nI cringed, grateful the network sensors were working and bleeped out the foul language. This was a disaster, but try as I might, I couldn't stop staring at the television. Just like a train wreck, I couldn't turn away.\n\n\"She was asking for what she got.\"\n\nJenna groaned and put her hands to her face.\n\n\"Are you saying Melody Hardwick deserved to be murdered?\" one of the reporters questioned.\n\n\"[bleep] right. She wadn't no saint. I can tell you that. But it wadn't my boy that done killed her.\"\n\n\"How can you be so sure?\"\n\n\"'Cause I know who did kill her.\" A-squared stared into the cameras.\n\nThis sent the reporters into a frenzy. They flung out questions at the speed of light. But A-squared merely grinned at the cameras, tapped his forehead knowingly, and winked.\n\nDetective Stinky Pitt must have been standing nearby because the next thing we saw was him pulling A-squared away from the cameras.\n\nWe stared at the screen for what felt like an hour afterward, but he never reappeared. When it was clear nothing more would be shown, I flipped to the other news stations. The same A-squared circus played on all of the news stations, but none of them had more than what we'd already seen.\n\nJenna hopped up and began to pace around the room. I'd seen my sister mad before, but nothing compared to this. Her face was red, and she kept mumbling, \"Oh my God. Oh my God.\"\n\nDawson's jaw was set in such a way I was certain he was grinding his teeth. He clenched and unclenched his fists. He looked mad enough to spit nails, as Nana Jo would say.\n\nNana Jo was the only one who looked to be enjoying herself. There was a twinkle in her eyes and her shoulders shook in silent laughter. After a few seconds, she finally burst out laughing.\n\nJenna spun around and stared. \"What's so funny? God knows I need a good laugh right now. That moron just insulted women, implied Melody Hardwick deserved to be murdered, and announced to the world he knows who murdered her. Oh, and he just got out of jail. People will think like father, like son. We need people to like Dawson and to believe him innocent. Most people will be so repulsed by that idiot, they may convict Dawson in the public's eyes without a trial.\"\n\nNana Jo wiped a tear from her eyes. \"You were worried Sam or I would say something to the media to ruin your case. Looks like we're the least of your worries. We could hardly make a bigger mess than that fool just did. Beam me up, Scotty, indeed.\"\n\nWe stared at her and then each other.\n\nNana Jo smiled. \"Nothing you can do about it now anyway. What's done is done.\"\n\nDawson had been tight-lipped throughout the news report. \"What are you going to do now?\" he asked Jenna.\n\n\"I'm going home and have a nice long bath, a good dinner, and a glass of wine . . . maybe a bottle. Then I'm going to bed. Tomorrow, I'll figure out what to do about your dad. I need to figure out a way to distance you from him.\" She grabbed her keys. \"I'll talk to you in the morning,\" she said to Dawson.\n\nHe nodded.\n\n\"Please, don't make this any worse than it already is.\" She looked at me and Nana Jo.\n\nWe crossed our hearts and held up three fingers in the Girl Scouts' honor and watched her leave.\n\nMy stomach growled and Nana Jo and Dawson acknowledged they were hungry too, so we scanned the cabinets for something to eat. Dawson discovered my stand mixer not only mixed dough but could also make pasta. Leon had bought several of the attachments that made everything from ice cream to sausage. The company that manufactured the stand mixer was headquartered in North Harbor, so accessories weren't hard to come by. I promised myself one day, when things settled down, I'd take a class and learn how to use the attachments I already had. That day never came. Now, Leon was gone. I wiped away a tear and hoped Nana Jo would chalk it up to the onions I was chopping. Thankfully, there were videos for virtually everything on the Internet. Dawson watched a five-minute crash course on making pasta, then took flour, salt, and water and made spaghetti. Nana Jo made a spicy marinara sauce and I chopped and grated. The end result was delicious.\n\nSpaghetti, a salad, and garlic toast gave me the final push I needed to head out to the campus in search of answers. Surely there was someone else besides Dawson who wanted to see Melody Hardwick dead. I prayed I could find that person before Dawson paid for a crime he didn't commit.\nChapter 8\n\nI really should have gone to campus earlier or waited until tomorrow, but time wasn't on my side. I didn't have a plan as I parked in the visitor lot and walked to the student union.\n\nMISU was on a beautiful, sprawling campus with acres of rolling lawn manicured to perfection. The campus sat on the outskirts of North Harbor with views of Lake Michigan from its western side. Ivy-covered brick buildings dotted the landscape and presented a peaceful backdrop. The university was founded in the early twentieth century with an emphasis on agriculture and teaching. Later, as the automotive industry grew in North Harbor and Detroit, the university expanded to include engineering and finally, a liberal arts school was added. The large trees that provided shade and shelter were centuries old.\n\nI enjoyed walking across MISU's campus because there was so much beauty to be seen. I wasn't sure where to look for a memorial for Melody Hardwick, but I started at the student union.\n\nOn the first floor there was a bookstore that sold everything from textbooks to macaroni and cheese. There was a cafeteria and an entire wall set aside for event flyers, jobs, and protests. I spent fifteen minutes scanning the board. The only thing I found close to a memorial was a MISU Students for Peace candlelight vigil to be held next week to mark the anniversary of the Kristallnacht or Night of Broken Glass. Kristallnacht, November 9, 1938, was the date the Nazis torched synagogues, vandalized homes, schools, and businesses of Jewish citizens, and killed close to one hundred people. Students of all races, nationalities, and religions were invited to a peaceful vigil on campus to mark the date and pray for peace. I was touched that students in a small Midwestern university wanted to remember an event from more than seventy years ago. I felt a moment of nostalgia for my teaching days. As a high school English teacher, I met and, I hoped, influenced some of these caring people.\n\n\"Sam.\"\n\nI was so absorbed in my thoughts I hadn't seen or heard Dorothy Clark's approach and jumped when she touched my shoulder. \"Dorothy. I'm sorry. I didn't see you there.\"\n\nShe stood next to me, holding a large bouquet of flowers. \"I know. I called your name several times. What's got you so engrossed on that board? Or are you just woolgathering.\"\n\n\"I was looking for some type of notice about a memorial for Melody, but I can't find anything.\" I looked at Dorothy closely. \"You look nice. You must have a hot date?\" I smiled and sniffed her flowers.\n\n\"I had a date, but the professor had to cancel at the last minute.\" She frowned. \"If he'd given me a little more notice, I would have gotten a replacement. But, oh, well.\" She looked around. \"Hey, you wanna join me? My granddaughter is performing at the new Hechtman-Ayers Center for Performing Arts tonight. I've got an extra ticket so it won't cost you a thing.\"\n\nI protested, but Dorothy was persistent.\n\n\"Look, you're not going to find out anything that'll help Dawson tonight from that board, and it's too late to go wandering around campus by yourself, anyway.\" She grabbed me by the arm. \"You look as though you could use a little culture in your life, anyway. Besides, afterward, we'll take Jillian out for coffee and you can pump her for information.\"\n\n\"But I'm not dressed for it.\"\n\n\"You look fine. You won't be the only person there in jeans. You'll look just like the other students.\"\n\nDorothy's intention was to place my mind at ease, but her words reminded me of my mom's criticism of my attire earlier in the week. I thought I had shoved those thoughts into my internal sea of forgetfulness. Dorothy's words brought the feelings back to the surface. I looked at my jeans, black T-shirt, and black hoodie. It was a lot of black. I thought about what I'd worn yesterday and the day before and briefly thought of my closet. It was full of blue jeans and dark shirts. I could hear my mom's voice in my head, \". . . hiding behind mourning.\"\n\nI shook myself to get my mom's voice out of my head.\n\n\"Are you cold, dear?\" Dorothy asked.\n\n\"No. I'm just . . . never mind. I'm fine. I'd love to see your granddaughter perform.\"\n\nWe walked the short distance to the new performing arts building. Dorothy had excellent seats near the front. Once we were seated, I looked around. She was right. I wasn't the only person wearing jeans. However, I refused to head down that road again. Instead, I focused on the beautiful building. Unlike the majority of the buildings on campus, the Hechtman-Ayers Center wasn't the traditional ivy-covered limestone box but was a light and bright, modern, concrete and glass shell. The school now offered everything from sculpture and metal-smithing to painting and dance studios, along with three performance spaces.\n\nThe performance tonight was Giselle, a classic ballet. According to the program book, Giselle was a frail but beautiful peasant girl in love with a count pretending to be a peasant. The count was already engaged and when his duplicity was revealed, Giselle dropped dead and became a spirit who trapped men and forced them to dance to death. Dorothy's granddaughter had the lead role, and she looked and performed beautifully.\n\nWhen the performance was over, she received a standing ovation and there were very few dry eyes in the building. I hadn't attended very many ballets. I'd seen the Nutcracker and Swan Lake in person, but this was amazing.\n\nI walked around the art gallery in the lobby while Dorothy went backstage and congratulated her granddaughter. Dorothy's son and daughter-in-law were out of the country and she wanted to make certain Jillian had family present for her performance. The lobby was a multipurpose space. In addition to showing off the lovely architecture of the building, with its tall walls and glass ceiling, it was also a marquee for advertising future performances and an exhibition space for sculptures and artwork. I didn't understand all of the art exhibited, but I appreciated the creativity and intelligence needed to create it.\n\nDorothy and Jillian were back long before I'd finished perusing all of the art, but maybe I'd come back another day. The three of us walked to the student union. They had a small River Bend Chocolate Factory caf\u00e9 that served chocolate, treats, and beverages. Most of the ballet patrons must have had the same idea because the small shop was packed, but Jillian and I snagged a table in the corner while Dorothy ordered.\n\n\"You were amazing. How long have you studied ballet?\" I asked while we waited for Dorothy.\n\nJillian was tall with a slender, dancer's body. She had large expressive dark eyes, and her hair was pulled back in a tight bun at the back of her neck.\n\n\"Thank you. I started ballet when I was three.\" She beamed. \"I love dancing.\"\n\n\"Do you do other dancing besides ballet?\"\n\n\"Jazz, tap, hip-hop, ballroom, Latin, you name it.\"\n\n\"Wow. So, are you a dance major?\"\n\nShe looked sad. \"No. I'm majoring in business with a dance minor.\" She shrugged. \"My dad thought I needed to major in something that would provide a stable income.\"\n\n\"It's good advice, although I recommend studying what makes you happy and obviously for you, that's dance. But business skills are always handy.\"\n\n\"I agree. I don't dislike business; in fact, I've been thinking I might like to have my own dance studio one day, but business classes aren't the thing that gets me revved up every day. I have lots of interests. In fact, I think we have one of them in common.\"\n\nI smiled but must have looked puzzled.\n\nShe laughed. \"Grandma said you own a mystery bookstore. That must be cool.\"\n\n\"I do, and I enjoy it a lot. Do you like mysteries?\"\n\n\"I love to read. I read some mysteries, but mostly I like romance. Grandma said you're investigating who killed Melody Hardwick. That sounds pretty cool.\"\n\n\"Well, I'm not sure about cool, but I don't believe Dawson killed her and the police don't seem to be looking for anyone else.\"\n\n\"Of course. I totally get it. How can I help?\"\n\n\"Did you know Melody?\"\n\n\"She was supposed to be in my history class, but I don't think I ever met her. She was a senior and I'm just a sophomore, and we didn't run in the same circles. But I do know her roommate.\"\n\n\"Supposed to be?\" I asked.\n\nJillian looked away. She was trying to decide whether to share something. I remained quiet and waited to see what she did. Eventually, she continued. \"She was on the student list, and she gets grades . . . but I never met her.\"\n\nI must have looked confused.\n\n\"We can see the grades online, so we know how everyone did on their quizzes and tests. It helps to know how you're doing in comparison to the other students.\" She shrugged. \"Weird thing is, she's getting A's, but I've never seen her in class, not one time\u2014not even for quizzes.\"\n\n\"But she has an A in the class?\"\n\nJillian nodded.\n\n\"That is strange. What class is it?\"\n\n\"History of Cults. The professor is nice. He's a little odd, but he's British, so his accent is nice. I think he's some kind of expert on the House of David.\"\n\n\"Interesting.\"\n\nDorothy arrived with coffee for herself and tea for Jillian and me. There were also three slices of cheesecake, which looked divine. Jillian allowed herself one taste then declined the rest, stating if she ate the rest, her dance partner wouldn't be able to lift her. Dorothy and I were forced to eat her slice too.\n\nWe chatted until Jillian recognized some of her friends and said she had to get back to the dorm. Before she left, she agreed to meet me at the student union tomorrow at eleven, in between classes, and would introduce me to Melody's roommate.\n\nI offered to drive Dorothy back to the retirement village. She had taken a taxi here, which must have cost a small fortune. We walked to the parking lot and, even though it was dark, I felt safe. Whether my feeling of safety was due to well-lit walkways with emergency police call boxes placed along the path or the fact Dorothy had a black belt in aikido, I wasn't sure. I suspected it was probably due to Dorothy's presence. I hoped her six-foot stature would deter anyone with malicious intent. If not, I'd witnessed her martial arts skills up close and she was definitely no one to be trifled with.\n\nI drove to the retirement village.\n\nAs she got out of the car, she said, \"I should have some information for you tomorrow afternoon. Tell Josephine I'll call her.\"\n\nI promised to relay the message, waited until she was safely inside, and drove home. Since Dawson's studio apartment was immediately above my garage, he knew when I was home. As soon as my engine was off, he opened his door and Snickers and Oreo ran down to meet me. They took care of business and we went upstairs. Drained didn't even begin to tap the surface of how I felt. Every muscle in my body felt tense and wound as tight as an alarm clock. I needed to relax, so I took a shower and, while the hot water pelted my skin, I thought about why I felt like a rung-out dishrag. A lot had happened in one day. From Dawson's DNA test, arrest, and arraignment to the A-squared media debacle, it had been one crazy day. We'd gone through a lifetime worth of life's worst events in less than eighteen hours. I didn't want to upset Dawson, so I'd held my emotions in check all day. Without a release, I felt like I would explode. As the heat from the hot water massaged and loosened my muscles, I cried. I started out with just a few tears but ended up sobbing into a washcloth until I had no tears left to cry. When I was spent, I felt hollow and hungry. I dried off and put on my pajamas. When I opened the bathroom door, I noticed a light in the kitchen and smelled coffee and apple pie.\n\nIn the kitchen, Nana Jo sat on a barstool with a cup of steaming coffee and a plate of apple pie.\n\n\"The last slice of pie is in the fridge.\"\n\n\"I shouldn't eat this. I just ate one and a half slices of cheesecake with Dorothy a couple hours ago.\"\n\n\"You've had a shock. You're supposed to eat sugar when you're in shock. Isn't that what they always do in those British cozies you read?\"\n\nI laughed. \"They drink tea with sugar. They don't eat cheesecake and pie.\"\n\n\"To-may-to. To-mah-to.\"\n\nI took my pie to the microwave.\n\n\"Twenty seconds gets it hot enough to melt ice cream without making the crust rubbery.\"\n\nI punched the time on the microwave and got the vanilla ice cream out of the freezer. Apple pie and ice cream were great, but Nana Jo's coffee seemed like the perfect accompaniment. If I drank coffee this late at night, I'd be awake for hours. However, something in my body desperately needed that caffeine. So, I took an individual coffee packet and placed it in the single-serve coffee maker. The smell of the coffee, heated apples, and spiced, sugary goodness was divine.\n\nNana Jo was right. My ice cream melted atop my pie and created a swirl of vanilla bean with the spiced apples, and when I took a bite, I moaned.\n\n\"Told you so.\"\n\nWe ate in silence for a few moments.\n\n\"You feel better?\"\n\nWithout saying a word, I knew Nana Jo was referring to my breakdown in the shower. Either she had ears like a bat or I was a lot louder than I thought. My money was on bat ears. Teachers learned to hone their senses after decades in the classroom. She had the ability to hear a gum wrapper in the back of a large classroom.\n\n\"You heard me?\"\n\nShe nodded as she used her spoon to scrape the last bit of ice cream from her plate and then licked it clean before putting it in her coffee cup.\n\n\"Actually, I do feel better.\"\n\nShe nodded. \"Sometimes you just need a good cry and apple pie.\" She smiled. \"It helps to release the pent-up anxiety. Cry too much and you end up with a headache. Too little and you still feel tense.\"\n\n\"I guess it just all sunk in. I know Dawson didn't kill Melody. But unless we figure out who did, he could go to jail.\" I stared at my bowl. \"Or worse.\"\n\n\"Don't think about that. We have to stay focused. Now, Sherlock, what have you learned?\"\n\nI smiled. \"Well, Watson, I didn't find out much.\" I told Nana Jo what I learned from Dorothy's granddaughter, such as it was.\n\n\"Let's recap what we do know. It might help to get your 'little gray cells' working.\"\n\nNana Jo loved mysteries as much as I did, so I knew she knew the \"little gray cells\" were a reference to Hercule Poirot and not Sherlock Holmes. So, I didn't correct her.\n\n\"We know Melody was a con artist, and I don't believe leopards ever change their spots. Once a con artist, always a con artist.\"\n\n\"You think she was playing a con on Dawson?\"\n\n\"Yep. I think she planned to get that boy to marry her. I'll bet you my last plug nickel when she looked at him all she saw was dollar signs. That whole penthouse thing was just the start.\"\n\n\"But why?\"\n\n\"To get him away from us.\"\n\nI stared. \"What do you mean?\"\n\n\"It's what cults do. They have to get their victims away from friends and family so they can start the brainwashing.\"\n\n\"How do you know that?\"\n\n\"There was a lecture at the Village a month or so ago about the House of David. Ruby Mae and I went. It was pretty interesting stuff. I even bought a book on them since they were local.\"\n\nNana Jo and I talked for a while, until she said she needed her beauty rest if she was going out sleuthing tomorrow. I delivered Dorothy's message and she went off to bed.\n\nI was still pretty alert from the coffee and decided writing might help to organize my thoughts.\n\nThompkins was kept busy greeting the guests and showing them to their rooms. Lord Charles and Abigail Chitterly were the first to arrive at ten on Thursday morning. Lord Charles was a portly man with thinning hair who was known for a hardy appetite for wine, women, and rich foods. His wife was a mousy American whose only distinctive feature seemed to be her affection for jewelry. She looked like a walking jewelry advertisement, wearing rubies, emeralds, and diamonds in every shape and size. They were followed by the Polish ambassador, J\u00f3zef Lipski, a short, thin man with weak eyes, large spectacles, and a stammer. The French ambassador, Georges Brasseur, an arrogant, hawk nosed man was next. Thompkins showed both gentlemen to their rooms as the foot men, Jim and Frank, took care of the luggage.\n\nThe German emissary, Count Rudolph Heigel, was tall, with slightly thinning blond hair and vacant blue eyes. He was a bit of a dandy, with immaculate attention to attire. He was a model of Aryan fervor who wore his role as an aide to the German secretary of state, Joachim von Ribbentrop, like a medal. Geoffrey Fordham Baker, editor of the London Times was one of the last to arrive. Fordham Baker was the fourth son of Henry Fordham Baker, 2nd Viscount of Lampton. Short, fat, and bald, Fordham Baker dressed in a slovenly manner and left a trail of crumbs in his wake. Cuddles followed him like a living Hoover, cleaning up the trail. Thompkins escorted each of the guests to their room and made sure everyone knew what time lunch would be served.\n\nSince no one was exactly sure when the entire party would arrive, lunch was a cold buffet, allowing guests to eat whenever they arrived. This made serving a lot easier for the staff and Thompkins was able to keep an eye on the guests, without maintaining a constant presence in the dining room. Additional staff would arrive later once everyone arrived. The Marsh family wasn't on intimate footing with any of the early arrivals but did their best to make their guests as comfortable and welcome as possible.\n\nThompkins was grateful for the extra staff in the evening. Wallis, the Duchess of Windsor, arrived with her maid, Rebecca, and an American socialite, Virginia Hall, an hour before dinner. Rebecca was a dark haired, dark eyed vixen, who winked, smiled, and flirted with every male she encountered. Similar to Wallis, she was tall and slender but was curvaceous in areas where Wallis was not. The duchess had a vast amount of luggage, which required two extra footmen and the maid to organize. Virginia Hall was much more interesting, with less baggage. She was an intelligent, well spoken woman with an infectious laugh, thick dark hair, light green eyes, and a wooden leg. She spoke freely about her accident as Thompkins showed her to her room. A hunting accident in Turkey required the amputation of her left leg from the knee down. Despite the wooden appendage, she exuded an air of confidence and determination.\n\nLady Elizabeth held dinner, to allow the duchess time to freshen up and change. It was, therefore, after nine when the party sat down to eat. Chitterly and Fordham Baker were well on their way toward intoxication before they tasted their first bite of dinner. Fordham Baker made an indelible impression on Thompkins by requesting to have his port glass filled while the duck consomm\u00e9 was served. Thompkins halted momentarily but quickly recovered. A glance to Lady Elizabeth was acknowledged by a slight nod, and Thompkins was back to his stiff, proper self.\n\nWallis, the Duchess of Windsor, was neither beautiful nor brilliant, yet she carried herself in a way that made people almost believe she was. Her dark hair was pulled back in a severe bun at the nape of her neck and emphasized her gaunt frame. She barely ate more than a few spoonfuls of the delightful dishes Mrs. Anderson prepared, despite the hours Lady Elizabeth and the cook spent planning a menu that was satisfying to men who'd spent the day shooting and a woman reported to be overly conscious of her weight. Wallis had a raspy voice and a loud, obnoxious laugh. She flirted shamelessly with Victor, Count Rudolph, or Count Rudy, as she called him, and Brasseur.\n\nAfter dinner, the group retired to the parlor for coffee. Lady Elizabeth knitted and watched the spectacle. Lord William had been attempting to engage Geoffrey Fordham Baker in conversation, but the editor had fallen asleep while nibbling on a biscuit. Cuddles, who had just finished consuming crumbs from the cuff of his pants, attempted to climb into his lap to gain access to the biscuit. Thankfully, Lord William caught him and removed him from the room and further temptation.\n\nLady Abigail had taken a seat near Lady Penelope and was pretending to ignore her husband's attention toward Daphne.\n\nDaphne looked a bit strained as she removed Lord Charles's hand from her knee for the third time by Lady Elizabeth's count.\n\nVirginia Hall and Lord James laughed and talked amiably with the Polish ambassador, J\u00f3zef Lipski.\n\nWallis, Count Rudolph, and Brasseur were huddled in a corner near the fireplace. A word of French occasionally escaped the confines of their circle and was quickly followed by a laugh or wink from the duchess. The conversation was obviously meant to be private and no one ventured into their circle. Victor stood nearby but didn't attempt to infiltrate their conclave.\n\nThompkins silently entered the parlor and hurried to Lady Elizabeth. He whispered in her ear. She paused for a second but quickly nodded.\n\nThompkins left and, after a brief pause, he opened the door again and announced, \"Miss Rebecca Minot.\"\n\nThompkins stepped aside and in waltzed a slender raven-haired beauty that appeared to have just stepped off the screen of a Hollywood picture.\n\nThe maid smiled large as she entered the room. \"Ah, I am sorry for zee lateness. Zee butler he is so . . . how do you say\"\u2014she paused\u2014\"he is very proper.\" She stood very straight and stiff in a pose to impersonate Thompkins. She laughed. \"He must get zee permission for me to come. Ah . . . but I am here now.\"\n\nRebecca sauntered over to the duchess.\n\n\"Yes, Rebecca, you're here now. That's all that matters. I couldn't entertain all of these handsome men without you here to help me.\" The duchess glanced at Lady Elizabeth. \"You don't mind that I invited Rebecca to join us, do you? She's more like a companion than a maid, anyway.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled. \"Of course I don't mind.\" \"I knew you'd understand. You're not the least bit stuffy and stuck-up like Cookie, your cousin.\" She tilted her head back and used a finger to push her nose up in the air. Then she looked down her nose and sniffed.\n\nRebecca and Wallis laughed.\n\nLord William blustered. He looked as though he wanted to speak but eventually pulled out his pipe and filled it with tobacco, dropping most of it on the carpet.\n\nLady Elizabeth couldn't hide her confusion. \"Cookie?\"\n\nWallis laughed. \"That's what I call her. Elizabeth looks just like a Scotch cook.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth took a few deep breaths to calm herself. \"No. I can't say that she does. I have always found Her Royal Highness to be elegant, graceful, and refined.\"\n\n\"I daresay we British must seem very silly to outsiders, but thousands of years of tradition are hard to forego.\" Daphne smiled. \"Did you really find Her Royal Highness stuffy and stuck-up? That's odd. I've never thought so. But then, she has made quite a few changes over the past year. I'm sure as she acclimates to her new position, she'll adapt.\"\n\nVictor nearly choked on his drink, and Penelope had to walk over and pat him on the back. \"I'm fine now. Thank you, dear.\"\n\nA brief flash in her eyes and flared nostrils were the only indication Wallis recognized the snub. She quickly recovered and gave a hollow laugh before pulling Rebecca over to join the French and German contingent.\n\nJames looked at Daphne with pride and respect in his eyes before returning to his conversation with Virginia Hall and the Polish ambassador.\n\n\"It's very dull here. How about zee music and dancing?\" Rebecca shimmied, which gained her the attention of Lord Charles and several other men.\n\nVictor flipped the switch for the wireless and tuned into the Seager's Good Mixers program featuring Oscar Rabin and his Romany band. Rebecca pulled Lord Charles to the center of the floor, where she tried to teach him the Lambeth Walk.\n\n\"Come on, dance with me, Rudy?\" Wallis turned to the count.\n\nRudolph Heigel's face was extremely red. His eyes bulged and he stood very erect. \"I will not defile myself with such things.\"\n\nThe duchess looked confused. \"But you dance so well.\" She turned toward the others. \"Rudolph used to be in pictures. He was an actor before he joined the military.\" She looked at the count. \"What's the matter?\"\n\n\"Oscar Rabin is a Jew,\" he spat.\n\nLord William's face turned beet red, and he sputtered, \"Abominable manners. Rude. Raised in a barn.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth managed to relay her displeasure in a single withering glance, which sent a flush up Count Rudolph's neck and made his ears look like beacons. A contrite look crossed his face briefly before he turned away toward Wallis.\n\nJ\u00f3zef Lipski watched near the fireplace. When he heard Count Rudolph's comments, his face grew red. He breathed heavily and clenched his hands into fists. The look in his eyes was one of murderous rage. He started toward Count Rudolph but was intercepted by Virginia Hall.\n\n\"Come on and dance with me and Cuthbert.\"\n\nJ\u00f3zef Lipski halted. He looked puzzled. \"Cuthbert?\"\n\n\"That's what I call my constant companion.\" She patted her wooden leg. \"Cuthbert isn't the best of dancers, but I think we can manage a slow twirl if you won't mind.\"\n\nLipski gave Count Rudolph a scowl then turned his attention to Virginia. \"I would be honored.\" He bowed and the two of them swayed to the music.\n\nDaphne looked relieved when Lord Charles abandoned her for the maid's company. For several minutes, she sat comfortably, without having to dodge unwanted hands.\n\nLady Elizabeth strolled over to her niece. A few seconds later, Penelope joined her sister in the seat vacated by Lord Charles, leaned over, and whispered, \"Well done.\"\n\nDaphne smiled. \"Thanks, but I doubt she even noticed the snub.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled. \"Trust me. I've heard she and David are livid over being denied the title of 'Her Royal Highness.' She noticed.\" She raised her cup in salute. \"Nicely done.\"\n\nDaphne looked around. \"This all seems like such a bizarre farce.\"\n\n\"What do you mean, dear?\" Lady Elizabeth asked.\n\n\"The world is on the brink of another war. Representatives from all of the nations currently in conflict are assembled at one house, our house.\" She inclined her head toward Count Rudolph. \"Twenty years ago all of the nations represented here were at war. Now here we all sit, dancing, drinking, and making merry.\"\n\nPenelope looked at her sister with surprise. \"I never knew you were concerned with foreign af fairs.\"\n\nDaphne smiled. \"Surprised I care about more than my clothes and hair?\"\n\n\"Well, honestly, yes.\"\n\n\"I admit I've been pretty self absorbed and shallow, but things are different now.\" She glanced across the room at James. \"There's a lot at stake, not just for England, but for the world. I sure hope James knows what he's doing.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth stared at her niece. \"So do I, dear. So do I.\"\n\nChapter 9\n\nCoffee late at night, combined with too many hours spent writing into the wee small hours of the morning, left me sleep deprived and cranky Thursday morning. Not even the smell of bacon soothed the savage beast. I sat at the bar and drank three cups of coffee before I even spoke to anyone. It was the safest plan. That way, no one got hurt.\n\nDawson hadn't baked anything, which left me unreasonably irritated. He didn't have to bake every day. There were plenty of treats for the customers, even though we weren't charging for them. I hadn't bothered to get the certificate from the Health Department to allow us to sell food, but no permit was needed to simply offer them and leave a container for donations.\n\n\"You better now?\" Nana Jo asked after I finished my third cup of coffee and started to eat my bacon sandwich.\n\n\"Hmmm,\" I mumbled.\n\n\"Good. Jenna called. She'll be here any minute.\"\n\nRight on cue, the doorbell rang. Snickers and Oreo were momentarily torn between heading downstairs to bark at the newcomer and waiting for bacon to fall to the floor.\n\n\"I'll go.\" Dawson grabbed two biscuits from the jar on the counter and headed downstairs.\n\nThe poodles followed the biscuits downstairs.\n\nDawson let Jenna in and took the dogs out.\n\nJenna joined us upstairs. She had a cup of tea from one of those high-priced coffee shops that had sprung up all over town and a white box. She hopped onto the seat next to me and grabbed a piece of bacon from my plate.\n\n\"Ten minutes ago, that move might have cost you a limb,\" I growled.\n\n\"What's wrong with her?\" she asked Nana Jo.\n\nNana Jo shrugged. \"Woke up on the wrong side of the bed.\"\n\n\"I wish you would stop talking about me like I'm not here.\" Maybe three cups of coffee weren't enough. I poured myself another one and pretended I didn't see the looks Nana Jo and Jenna exchanged.\n\nDawson and the poodles made their way back upstairs.\n\n\"So, I've had some time to think about how we should proceed after the unfortunate events of yesterday.\" Jenna smiled at me and slid the box toward me.\n\nI knew my sister. If she brought me treats, she was working herself up to say something I wouldn't like.\n\nI stared at the box pointedly for several seconds and then looked at my sister and raised an eyebrow.\n\n\"Aren't you going to open it?\"\n\n\"Beware of geeks bearing gifts,\" I said.\n\n\"It's Greeks, not geeks.\" Jenna wasn't always the brightest bulb in the pack, but she eventually got the joke and groaned. \"Just open the box.\"\n\nI opened the box, which contained half a dozen strawberry tarts from my favorite bakery, A Taste of Switzerland. The tarts glistened with a sugary glaze under the lights in my kitchen, and I swore I heard them whisper my name.\n\nNana Jo reached in and grabbed a tart. \"Hmmm. This must be a biggie if you're softening the blow with ten dollar pastries.\"\n\nA Taste of Switzerland's pastries weren't quite ten dollars each, but they were pricey. I wanted to be strong and hold out until I heard what Jenna was leading up to, but after Dawson and Jenna each grabbed tarts, there were only three lonely looking tarts left in the box. My willpower fled. I grabbed one. I bit into the flaky crust and my eyes rolled back into my head as the sugary goodness seeped through my body. I might have moaned because I heard laughter and when I opened my eyes, Nana Jo, Dawson, and Jenna were all staring at me with silly grins on their faces.\n\n\"Shut up.\" I licked the gooey strawberry filling off my fingers.\n\n\"I guess that must have done the trick,\" Nana Jo said.\n\n\"I know my sister.\" Jenna wiped her hands on a napkin.\n\n\"Alright.\" I wiped my mouth and took a swig of my coffee, swishing it around in my mouth to make sure every delicious crumb made its way to my stomach. \"What do you want?\"\n\n\"I want to use the media to our advantage. I'd like to invite some of the media here to the bookstore and have them interview Dawson. I want them to see he's nothing like his dad. He isn't a killer. He's just a kind, honest kid who plays football, bakes, works hard, and goes to school.\"\n\n\"I thought you didn't want us talking to the media?\" I tried to avoid sounding whiney and deliberately flattened the scowl I felt developing on my forehead.\n\n\"Yeah, well, that was before Dawson's dad went on television and in one fell swoop insulted the police, the victim, and all women everywhere.\" She looked at Dawson. \"No offense.\"\n\n\"None taken,\" he mumbled.\n\n\"Here's what I want. One of Tony's fraternity buddies is the producer for WJMU. He's agreed to an exclusive interview. I get to see all of the questions in advance and I'll be right there the whole time. I can pull the plug if he goes off script and, trust me, I will.\"\n\nDawson looked uncertain. \"I don't know . . .\"\n\n\"You can't be shy. You've done interviews after football games. It'll be just like that.\"\n\n\"After a game, I talk about football. I can talk football all day. What am I gonna say to this guy?\"\n\n\"You'll tell him about growing up without your mom and how you were raised by an abusive, alcoholic father.\"\n\nDawson shook his head. \"I don't wanna talk about any of that.\"\n\nJenna looked down. \"Unfortunately, some of it's going to come out anyway. I talked to a friend at the River Bend Times, and some of the information from child protective services has already been leaked.\"\n\nNana Jo and I were indignant.\n\nI asked. \"Aren't juvenile records supposed to be confidential?\"\n\nJenna shrugged. \"Dawson's records are, but his father's aren't.\"\n\n\"Well, I'll be . . .\" Nana Jo said.\n\n\"This will be your chance to show the public who you are. There's been so much negative publicity in the news about athletes behaving badly and getting away with it, the public may not be supportive.\"\n\n\"Jenna's right.\" Nana Jo turned to Dawson. \"This is your chance to show them you're just a poor kid trying to pull yourself up by your jockstrap.\"\n\nI nearly choked on my coffee. \"I think the phrase is bootstrap.\"\n\n\"Whatever.\" She rolled her eyes. \"Show them how you bake to unwind. Heck, let them taste your cookies.\"\n\nDawson groaned. \"I'll never live this down. When the guys on the team hear I like to bake, they'll never stop raggin' me.\"\n\nNana Jo patted him on the back. \"Honey, I hate to break this to you, but the guys on the team are the least of your problems right now.\"\n\nJenna and Nana Jo were right, but I was still reluctant. Agreeing to this could expose Dawson to public ridicule, and there was no guarantee anyone would believe him. \"This seems risky to me.\"\n\nMy sister wasn't someone who took risks. There was more to this than she was revealing.\n\n\"What aren't you telling us?\"\n\nJenna sighed. \"Okay. I've talked to a friend in the DA's office. He wants to be seen as tough on crime, so he plans to come down hard on you, just to show how tough he is.\"\n\nNana Jo mumbled something that sounded like weasel.\n\n\"But what about my dad? He said he knew who the real killer is.\"\n\nJenna paused for a moment. \"Frankly, no one is taking him seriously.\"\n\nI exchanged a glance with Nana Jo.\n\nJenna took a deep breath. \"Your dad could be facing more jail time. He's been trying to extort money.\"\n\n\"From who?\" I asked.\n\n\"Anyone . . . everyone. The media, the police, the district attorney, you name it. He says he knows who the killer is, but he won't talk unless he gets a quarter of a million dollars.\"\n\nNana Jo whistled.\n\nDawson stared openmouthed but then dropped his head and looked away.\n\n\"My source at the police station doesn't believe he knows anything, but they'll investigate, provided he gives them something.\"\n\nWe discussed the interview for a while longer. Finally, Jenna looked at Dawson. \"Well, what do you think?\"\n\nDawson looked at Nana Jo and me. \"Do you think I should?\"\n\nNana Jo nodded. \"I do. I think it will be your chance to tell your story. Plus, if you want, I'll be there to support you.\"\n\nEveryone looked at me. I stared in my empty coffee cup, then took a deep breath. \"I think you should do it too. But, it's totally up to you. You have to follow your gut. What do you think?\"\n\nDawson took a moment before responding. \"I don't really want to do it\u2014\"\n\nI started to interrupt, but he held up a hand to stop me. \"But I think I should. Mrs. Thomas is right. It will give me a chance to tell my side of things.\"\n\nJenna exhaled. \"Great. I was hoping you'd agree, especially since I already told them to come around noon.\"\n\nDawson looked as though he was mustering up his courage to speak. Finally, he said, \"I'll do the interview.\" He turned to Jenna. \"But can you do me a favor, please?\"\n\nJenna said, \"Sure, if I can.\"\n\nDawson took a deep breath. \"Can you please help my dad? I know he's a big jerk and he's done some bad things, but he's still my dad.\"\n\nJenna stared at Dawson for a moment. \"Dawson, I don't know if I can help your father. He\u2014\"\n\n\"But he really needs someone\u2014\"\n\n\"Wait. It's not that I don't want to help. I may not be able to help. I have to be careful there's no conflict of interest. I'm your lawyer, and I have a responsibility to represent you to the best of my ability.\"\n\nDawson hung his head. \"I understand. I just thought maybe you could talk to him.\"\n\nJenna stared at him. \"Okay. I'll talk to him. But, I can't promise anything. I have to check with his PD. And as long as she's okay with it, I'll talk to him. Okay?\"\n\n\"Great. Yeah. That's great.\" He perked up and smiled. \"Thanks.\"\n\nWe talked for a bit and decided we didn't all need to hang around for the interview. Since I'd already made arrangements to go on campus and meet Jillian, I'd let Nana Jo and Jenna handle the media.\n\nJenna left not long afterward.\n\nI did some paperwork for the bookstore until the twins arrived to help. I would miss them when fall break was over and they went back to school. They were such a great help.\n\n* * *\n\nI met Jillian at the student union as arranged. She was dressed in a miniskirt with leggings and a sweater with ballet flats. Last night her hair had been slicked back into a bun. Today it was thick and wavy and loose.\n\n\"I like your hair.\"\n\n\"Thanks. It takes a lot to get it under control for performances.\" She laughed.\n\nShe took me to Melody's dorm. The door was slightly open, but we knocked and were instructed to come in.\n\n\"Mrs. Washington, this is Emma Lee.\" Jillian turned to Emma. \"This is . . . Mrs. Washington.\"\n\n\"Please, call me Sam.\" I extended my hand.\n\nThe dorm room was small, about the size of my bedroom at home. Small bedrooms are fine when it was just one person and all you needed to do was sleep in the room. However, this room was shared by two people. So there were twin beds, two desks, two dressers, and two closets. One side of the room had posters, family pictures, and a colorful comforter on the bed and looked homey. The other side was barren with nothing except a nondescript blue coverlet to prove anyone lived there.\n\nEmma Lee was petite. She might have been five feet and one hundred pounds if she wore weights. She was Asian with dark almond eyes and long dark hair, which she wore pulled back into a ponytail. She looked uncertain, but good manners always showed and she stepped forward and shook my outstretched hand.\n\nJillian went to Emma's bed and sat.\n\nEmma pulled out her chair for me and I sat. She sat in the other chair and waited.\n\n\"I wondered if you could answer a few questions about your roommate for me.\"\n\nEmma was silent.\n\nI intercepted a look between the two girls. Jillian nodded as if to say \"she's okay.\"\n\n\"Fine. But I'm not sure how much help I can be.\" Emma spoke with a distinct southern accent, which made me smile to see that southern belles came in all different shapes, sizes, and colors.\n\nI couldn't hide the surprise on my face and I heard it in my voice. \"As her roommate, you must have gotten to know each other pretty well.\"\n\nEmma shook her head. \"I hardly ever saw her.\"\n\nI looked at the bare side of the room.\n\n\"Melody rarely used this room.\" She went to the closet and opened it. \"She kept a few items of clothing here, but that's about it.\"\n\n\"But if she didn't stay here, where did she stay?\"\n\nEmma shrugged. \"Beats me.\"\n\n\"Do you know if she had any family?\"\n\nShe shook her head. \"I have no idea. When we met, I tried to ask the normal questions, like 'where're you from?' I tried to get to know her. But she shut me down so fast it made my head spin.\"\n\n\"How long were you roommates?\"\n\n\"Only since the start of the semester.\"\n\n\"Is there anything you can tell me about her?\" I got up and walked over to Melody's side of the room. \"Mind if I look?\"\n\n\"Help yourself, but there ain't much to see. When I realized she wasn't planning to stay, I took a peek.\" Emma got up and joined me.\n\nThere were three sweaters, a warm leather bomber jacket, and a pair of tennis shoes in the closet. The dresser had two pairs of underwear, a bra, a nightshirt, and a small bag of toiletries.\n\n\"Is that it?\" I closed the last drawer.\n\n\"Yes, ma'am.\"\n\nI stood in the room and looked around, mentally comparing Emma's side of the room with Melody's. \"But where are her school items?\" I walked over to the desk and opened the drawer. There wasn't even a pencil.\n\n\"Beats me.\" Emma shrugged.\n\nI stared at her. \"Did the police remove anything?\"\n\n\"No one from the police came by. Well, not while I've been here at least.\" She looked confused. \"That's odd, isn't it?\"\n\n\"Yes. I would have expected someone would have come by.\"\n\nA sudden thought made Emma gasp. \"Sweet Jesus, you think they notified her family?\"\n\n\"I'm sure someone from the school has if the police didn't,\" I said with more confidence than I felt.\n\nIt must have been enough to put Emma at ease, because she breathed a sigh of relief. \"Well, thank the Lord for that.\"\n\n\"Did you have any classes with Melody?\"\n\nEmma shook her head. \"No, ma'am.\"\n\n\"What was her major?\"\n\nShe shrugged. \"Beats me.\"\n\nI was confused. \"But she was a senior. That means she'd be graduating in a few months. Surely she mentioned what she was getting her degree in?\"\n\n\"All I know is she transferred here from the East Coast. Melody wasn't talkative.\"\n\nJillian mumbled, \"At least not to women.\"\n\n\"Help me understand.\" I looked from one of them to the other.\n\nEmma said, \"She didn't talk much, but from what I gathered, she was majoring in M-r-s.\"\n\n\"Excuse me?\"\n\nEmma smiled. \"You know, M-r-s.\" She pointed at her ring finger.\n\n\"You mean she was just here looking for a husband.\"\n\nThey nodded.\n\nI turned to Jillian. \"But aren't you in the same class?\"\n\n\"Supposed to be, but that's what's weird. I've only seen her there once all semester.\" Jillian pulled her laptop out of her book bag, typed something, and navigated for a few seconds. When she was finished, she turned the laptop to face me. \"Here's the online link to our class. We use a program called Canvas.\"\n\n\"I'm familiar with Canvas. I used to be a teacher.\"\n\nJillian smiled. \"Great. From here, anyone enrolled in the class can see the syllabus, the homework assignments, and exams, pretty much everything.\"\n\nI looked at the familiar site.\n\nJillian navigated to the grades section.\n\n\"I can see all of my grades because I'm logged into the system. But, if I click here\"\u2014she clicked on a link on the navigation bar\u2014\"I can see everyone's grades in the class. That way, I can see how I stack up against everyone else.\"\n\nI stared at the screen. \"But there are no names listed, only student identification numbers. How do you know which one is Melody's?\"\n\n\"They do that for privacy,\" Emma added.\n\n\"True. But, it doesn't take much to figure out who's who.\" Jillian looked sheepish. \"Process of elimination. Look. This is me.\" She pointed to a line on the screen. \"There are only fifteen people in this class and the rest of us talk to each other. \"\n\n\"They tell you their grades?\" I asked.\n\n\"Sometimes. But you can pretty much figure out who got what. Last month, Martin was complaining about getting a low grade. He said he had a perfect score up until then. So that has to be him.\" She pointed at a line on the screen. \"Eva had a family emergency and had to go home. So the incompletes for the last two assignments are hers.\"\n\nEmma added, \"Regina was telling everyone how she aced the last test, which made up for her getting low scores on the two previous ones.\"\n\n\"Based on what people have said, and through the process of elimination, I know this\"\u2014she pointed at one line\u2014\"has to be Melody. No one else has gotten a perfect score through the entire course.\"\n\nI stared at the screen and then at Jillian. \"You're amazing. You'll be a fine detective.\"\n\nShe grinned. \"Must run in my genes.\"\n\n\"I'll bet if we could find out her student number, we could confirm her grade,\" I said. \"Although, I'm not sure what that will tell us.\"\n\n\"She's getting a perfect score in a class she never attends,\" Jillian said.\n\n\"Seems fishy to me,\" Emma added.\n\n\"Me too.\"\n\nI offered to take the girls to lunch to thank them for their help. Thursday was Emma's short day for classes, but Jillian had a lab and wouldn't be free until after two. We agreed to meet at the student union at two fifteen.\n\nMISU wasn't a large campus, but it could be quite confusing to get around, so I had to ask for directions to the administration building. I hadn't held out much hope they'd provide information to a total stranger. The Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act of 1974, or FERPA, made it impossible for anyone to get student educational information without written permission from the student. Parents couldn't even get their son's or daughter's grades, so I wasn't surprised when they refused to provide them to me.\n\nAs I left the administration building, I ran into Peter Castleton, MISU's athletic director. He'd been very supportive of Nana Jo and me tutoring Dawson over the summer.\n\n\"How's Dawson?\"\n\nCastleton was about five ten, two hundred pounds. He was bald with the lean, muscular physique of a runner.\n\n\"As well as can be expected. He's worried, and he misses football.\"\n\nCastleton nodded. \"I'm sure, but the policy is very clear. Any athlete charged with a felony must be suspended from all academic and athletic activities until the situation is resolved.\"\n\n\"I know.\"\n\nCastleton stared at me pointedly. \"You understand I'm in a bit of a difficult situation here. I like Dawson. I think he's a good kid with a very bright future if . . .\"\n\n\"If he doesn't get convicted for murder?\"\n\nCastleton nodded. \"I'm really sorry. We try to warn the boys.\"\n\n\"Warn them?\"\n\nCastleton squirmed. \"Against honey traps.\"\n\n\"What's a honey trap?\"\n\nCastleton rubbed the back of his neck. \"Some young people enter college with the sole intention of finding a spouse, preferably a wealthy one or someone with the potential to become wealthy\u2014a meal ticket.\"\n\n\"You think Melody's only interest in Dawson was as a meal ticket?\"\n\nHe waved his hand. \"I don't know anything about her personally, and I don't want to speak ill of the dead, but some of the players talk.\"\n\n\"Can I talk to them?\"\n\nHe stared at me.\n\n\"We're trying to figure out who else might have wanted to kill her. The police are stuck on Dawson and aren't looking for anyone else. I'm hoping maybe some of the players may have seen or heard something that might help.\"\n\nCastleton seemed to think that through. \"The players will be watching a film at six tonight in the athletic center's media room.\" He pulled out a piece of paper and an envelope from his back pocket and wrote on it. \"Show this and your driver's license to the guard and he'll let you in.\" He handed me a note which granted me permission to enter, basically a permission slip.\n\n\"Thank you.\"\n\nI still had about thirty minutes before I was to meet Emma and Jillian at the student union, so I made my way to the history department. After asking around, I found a long, narrow closet with Professor Harley Quin's name on the door. The door was open.\n\nJazz drifted from inside, which made me stop. I peeked inside. A blue-eyed Sean Connery pretended to play the piano along with the music.\n\nI must have moved because he glanced my way, smiled, and turned down the music.\n\n\"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt.\"\n\n\"Caught in the act.\" He not only looked like Sean Connery, but he spoke with a British accent.\n\n\"That's one of my favorites.\"\n\nI could tell by the skeptical look on his face he didn't believe me. \"Really?\"\n\n\"I love David Benoit.\"\n\nSurprise and a small amount of awe played across his face. \"Ah . . . but what's the name of the song?\"\n\nI smiled. \" 'Linus & Lucy.' \"\n\nHe smacked his leg. \"Brilliant. Nine out of ten people would have said, 'Peanuts.' You really are a fan. Come in. Welcome to my closet.\" He made a grand sweeping gesture with his arm and pushed a pile of papers onto the floor. He had on brown tweed pants and a white shirt with a bow tie. He looked like Sean Connery in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.\n\nI walked into the room, which couldn't have been more than five feet wide. I could literally reach out and touch both walls at the same time. There were books and papers on practically every surface.\n\n\"Now, what can I do for you? You're not one of my students. I certainly would have remembered you.\"\n\nI grinned at the compliment. \"Well, I was hoping you could help me. I have some questions about one of your students.\"\n\nHe looked puzzled. \"I'll try.\" He turned in his seat so he faced me.\n\nI was finding it very hard to look him in the eyes without smiling like a lovesick schoolgirl. I needed to pull myself together. I took a deep breath. \"Can you tell me about Melody Hardwick?\"\n\nHe looked puzzled. \"Melody Hardwick . . . Melody Hardwick, I'm afraid I don't . . . you don't by any chance mean the girl who was strangled by that football player, do you?\"\n\nNothing could have cured my lovesick attitude quicker. I squinted my eyes and my blood pressure rose. \"Dawson Alexander is a fine young man, and he did not kill anyone.\" I enunciated when I was angry, and I was angry now. \"And, in this country, people are innocent until proven guilty.\" I rose and turned for the door.\n\n\"Whoa. Wait. I'm sorry.\" He jumped out of his seat and grabbed me by the arm. \"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. Please forgive me?\"\n\nHearing someone accuse Dawson of murder made me furious.\n\n\"Please. Won't you sit down?\" he begged.\n\nI took several deep breaths and returned to my seat.\n\n\"I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to insult you or Mr. Alexander. I was merely repeating what I'd heard. Now, how can I help you?\"\n\n\"Melody Hardwick was one of your students. I was hoping you could tell me something about her.\"\n\nHe shook his head. \"I wish I could, but I've only been here a semester and I'm afraid I don't really know many of the students yet. I saw her picture in the newspaper, but honestly, it didn't ring a bell with me. Are you sure she was in my class?\"\n\nI nodded. \"Yes. She was in History of Cults.\"\n\nHe thought for a moment and then shook his head. \"I'm sure you're right, but I don't remember her. I guess she didn't make much of an impression on me.\"\n\nHe smiled in a way that implied I was making an impression. I felt nervous and uncomfortable. It had been a long time since anyone flirted with me. I was out of practice and began to fidget so much I dropped my purse.\n\n\"I know one of the other girls in the class, and she tells me Melody never attended class but she had a perfect grade.\"\n\n\"Well, that's odd. Let's take a look.\" He turned to his computer and tapped away for a few minutes. \"Now I remember. It's the name that threw me. I have an Elizabeth Mae Simpson.\"\n\n\"Yes, that's her. She was using an alias.\"\n\n\"How odd.\" He scanned the computer screen. \"Miss Simpson is showing a perfect score. You say she never attended class? I'll certainly have to look into it. Must be a mistake.\" He turned to face me. \"This computer system is different than the one I'm used to back in England. I must have made a mistake.\" He smiled. \"I'm sure I would have found it before the end of the term.\"\n\nIt sounded reasonable.\n\n\"Now, is there anything else I can help you with?\"\n\n\"Actually, there is something else, but it's rather personal.\" My face heated.\n\n\"Now this sounds promising.\" He settled back and fixed an inquiring look on my face.\n\n\"I'm writing a book.\"\n\n\"Wonderful.\"\n\n\"Thank you. It's a mystery set in the British countryside. I was wondering if maybe you could help me with some research,\" I stammered.\n\n\"I'd love to. I'll be happy to answer any questions I can. Perhaps we can discuss it over dinner say, tomorrow night?\"\n\n\"Mrs. Washington?\"\n\nI turned, thankful to see Jillian standing in the doorway. \"Yes. Tomorrow night will be fine.\"\n\n\"Why don't you leave me your number and I'll call you with the details.\"\n\n\"Okay.\" I hurriedly wrote my cell number on a sheet of paper and rushed from the room, remembering at the last minute to turn and say, \"Thank you.\"\n\n\"No. Thank you.\"\n\nOutside, Jillian rushed to keep up with me. \"Hey, I'm sorry, Mrs. Washington. I didn't mean to interrupt. I had to drop off a book with one of my professors. I didn't mean\u2014\"\n\n\"It's okay. You didn't interrupt anything. He's just going to help me with some research for a . . . a book I'm working on.\"\n\n\"Granny told me you've written a book. That's great.\"\n\nDorothy Clark certainly had a big mouth. I'd have to be careful what I told her, but none of this was Jillian's fault. \"Come on. We better get over to meet Emma.\"\nChapter 10\n\nEmma was waiting for us at the student union. Both girls in tow, I headed to downtown North Harbor. They asked to see my bookstore and I was rather curious about Dawson's interview, so I headed home.\n\nThe interview had just wrapped up and the reporters were loading equipment into a large van in the back parking lot.\n\nDawson looked tired, but no other signs of distress were present. Nana Jo wasn't waving her peacemaker and there were no dead bodies, so I assumed all went well. I was a bit anxious to watch it.\n\nThere were a few patrons in the shop, but my nephews had things under control. The twins rushed to offer assistance to my two young friends. Boys would be boys.\n\nI walked over to Dawson. \"How'd it go?\"\n\nHe shrugged. \"Okay, I think.\" He rubbed the back of his neck. \"I hate talking about myself, but Mrs. Rutherford said it was good.\"\n\nI patted his shoulder. \"Then I'm sure it was fine.\" I stared at him. \"You look tired. Have you eaten?\"\n\nHe shook his head.\n\n\"Why don't you come with us?\" I looked around. \"Melody's roommate, Emma, and Dorothy's granddaughter, Jillian, helped me earlier, and I promised them lunch.\" I looked at my watch. \"Although it's almost dinnertime.\"\n\n\"Where are you going?\"\n\n\"I thought I'd try that new restaurant that opened up a few doors down. I started to eat there the other day, but I never actually got to eat.\" That was Monday, when I'd seen the police had picked up Dawson for Melody's murder and rushed to the police station. Definitely a day I'd like to forget.\n\nNana Jo joined us. \"He did a real fine job. Real fine.\"\n\nI could tell by the raspy sound in her voice, Nana Jo had fought back tears.\n\n\"I was just inviting Dawson to lunch.\"\n\n\"Good. I'm hungry enough to eat an entire heifer. Let me get my purse.\"\n\nNana Jo ran upstairs and by the time she returned, I'd arranged for Jillian, Dawson, Zaq, and Emma to go down and secure seating. Christopher agreed to stay and keep things going in the bookstore in exchange for a burger and fries.\n\n\"I called the girls while I was upstairs. They're on their way. We were supposed to meet for the book club.\"\n\n\"I totally forgot about the book club meeting today.\"\n\nThe Sleuthing Seniors Book Club formed over the summer, and Nana Jo and her friends met at the bookstore on the first Thursday of every month to discuss mysteries.\n\n\"Maybe I should go tell everyone there will be four more coming for lunch.\" I started toward the door.\n\n\"No worries. I already sent a text message to Jenna.\"\n\nNana Jo looked like she wanted to talk, so I waited.\n\n\"That boy has really had a tough time.\" She shook her head and swallowed hard in an effort to keep her emotions in check. \"I knew things were hard, but I never knew everything.\"\n\n\"He doesn't like talking about his dad or his life as a kid. Remember when we found him hiding out in the bathroom of the bookstore?\"\n\nNana Jo nodded. \"His father got drunk as a skunk and beat the crap out of him. He ran away with nothing but the clothes on his back.\"\n\nI patted Nana Jo and tried to keep from getting teary eyed as I thought back. \"I'm so glad he came here.\"\n\n\"Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if he hadn't been working at that country club.\"\n\nI laughed. \"And if I hadn't drank four glasses of champagne on an empty stomach and made a spectacle of myself at the funeral reception for Clayton Parker when I puked and needed help getting home.\"\n\nNana Jo laughed. \"Clayton Parker was an evil man, but if it weren't for him, we might not have Dawson with us now. Maybe he wasn't so worthless after all.\"\n\nClayton Parker's death wasn't a reason for rejoicing, but I understood what she was getting at.\n\nWhen the girls arrived, we walked to the restaurant. Two tables had been pushed together at the back of the restaurant. Dawson sat at the end with Jillian and Emma on either side of him. Zaq was next to Emma and Jenna sat next to Jillian. I sat next to Jenna and across from Dorothy. Nana Jo seated herself at the head of the table and Irma and Ruby Mae were on her sides.\n\nWhen the waitress arrived to take our drink orders, Nana Jo took a look at her watch and ordered a Wild Turkey, neat. She pulled out her iPad and put on her glasses. She waited until all the drink orders were placed. \"Now, we're under a time crunch, so I suggest we move forward with our meeting.\" She looked around.\n\nNo one disagreed.\n\n\"Who would like to start?\" She looked around the table.\n\nIrma coughed and raised her hand. \"I talked to my great-grandson, Ernie. He's a realtor.\" She coughed. \"He said Virgil Russell was a shady character and a slumlord. Apparently, he applied for a grant from the government to build that high-rise on the lake. Said he was building low-income housing for minorities and senior citizens so he got a super low interest rate. But then he made those units the smallest units he could. Ernie says he rarely rents to low-income folks unless they pay him under the table.\"\n\n\"What do you mean, pay him under the table?\" I asked.\n\n\"If they have a section eight voucher, they pay a reduced rate to their landlord and HUD pays the difference. The landlord is supposed to make repairs, but Ernie said Virgil Russell stalls on the repairs.\"\n\n\"What's HUD?\" Jillian asked.\n\n\"The Department of Housing and Urban Development,\" Ruby Mae added.\n\n\"Why would anyone put up with that?\" Dorothy asked.\n\nRuby Mae looked up from her knitting. \"They put up with it because they don't want to make trouble.\" She looked around. \"I found out quite a bit on that scoundrel, but I'll wait my turn. I don't want to interrupt.\" She nodded to Irma. \"Go ahead, honey.\"\n\nIrma continued, \"Ernie said Virgil Russell is a sleazy, lowlife slumlord who can't be trusted any farther than he can spit.\" Irma then turned and spit on the floor.\n\n\"Irma!\" everyone said.\n\nIrma coughed and then took a swig of the whiskey the server placed in front of her. \"Sorry.\"\n\nNana Jo turned to Ruby Mae. \"Perhaps you would like to go now.\"\n\nRuby Mae stopped knitting long enough to take a sip of her coffee. \"What I found out confirms what Irma said. Virgil Russell is a slumlord. My niece's boy, Robert Earl, works downtown at the County-City building. They've been trying to clean up a lot of the run-down housing in North Harbor. He said a lot of the worst properties are owned by absentee landlords, but Virgil Russell owns over one hundred rentals, basically shacks. Most of them need to be torn down.\"\n\n\"Roach motels is what Ernie called them.\" Irma burst into a coughing fit.\n\nDorothy smacked Irma on the back. \"You need to build up your immune system. You're just a wreck.\" She reached in her bag and pulled out a bottle of tablets. \"Here, you need to take these air immune tablets. They're wonderful.\" Dorothy handed two tablets to Irma.\n\nIrma looked at the tablets and then popped them both in her mouth and started to chew.\n\nDorothy looked stricken and then shouted, \"What are you doing? You don't just put them in your mouth. You have to dissolve them in water.\"\n\nIrma coughed and then began foaming at the mouth. She reached for a glass of water. With each gulp of water, more foam came from her mouth.\n\nRestaurant patrons began to stare.\n\nThe manager came over. \"Is everything okay? I'm trained on the Heimlich.\"\n\nIrma shook her head but then realized he was making his way toward her. Finally, she reached in her mouth and pulled out her teeth. She took her napkin and wiped her tongue and mouth.\n\n\"Blech. Dorothy, what the h\u2014\"\n\n\"Irma!\"\n\nIrma grabbed her drink and tossed it back, then grabbed Nana Jo's drink and took a long swig. Then she swished the liquid around in her mouth and swallowed.\n\nWe all stared for several seconds and then burst out laughing.\n\nThe manager looked around like he didn't know what to think of us. He eventually joined in the laughter too.\n\nWhen we finally pulled ourselves together, Jenna wiped her eyes. \"Oh my goodness.\"\n\nZaq and the younger crew continued laughing.\n\nIrma smiled and picked up her teeth and wrapped them in her napkin, which got everyone started laughing again.\n\nNana Jo said, \"Irma, what made you take your teeth out?\"\n\nIrma said, \"Once that stuff got in my teeth, I tried using my tongue to work it out. I guess it agitated the darned things with my saliva and I started foaming. Then when I drank the water, it got worse. Since I couldn't get it out of my teeth, I decided to get rid of the teeth.\" She grinned and everyone laughed again.\n\nNana Jo said, \"Ruby Mae, I think it's safe for you to continue now.\"\n\n\"Well, as I was saying, Virgil Russell is a slumlord.\"\n\nEmma tentatively raised a hand. \"Excuse me. I just think that's awful. Why do people put up with that?\"\n\nRuby Mae continued, \"The wait list for low-income housing is long, especially for more than two bedrooms. When I was in Chicago, after my husband left, I was on the wait list for five years for one of those Section Eight housing vouchers that helps low-income people afford decent housing. By the time I finally got to the top of the wait list, my cleaning business had taken off and I didn't qualify anymore, and I'm thankful for that. Lord knows I'm thankful. Some of those places were awful. I would have just as soon slept outside.\" She shook her head. \"There was a lady at my church who was living in one of Virgil Russell's run-down shacks. I've never seen such filth. She complained, and he made her life miserable. He wouldn't make repairs. Her toilet was out for almost six months, and he wouldn't repair it. He wouldn't collect the trash. It was bad.\"\n\nEmma looked appalled. \"But that's horrible. Why did she stay?\"\n\n\"Where else is she gonna go, baby? She had three small children and no other family. She didn't have the money to get the repairs done herself.\" Ruby Mae leaned in. \"But here's the worst part. You know that filthy little heathen had the nerve to tell her she could pay in other ways.\" Ruby Mae raised her eyebrows in a suggestive manner.\n\nEveryone got what Ruby Mae was talking about except Emma, who had a puzzled expression on her face.\n\nIrma leaned over and patted her hand. \"She's talking about sex, honey.\"\n\nEmma's face turned bright red, and her expression went from puzzled to shock to revulsion in less than ten seconds. \"Eww.\" She shook herself. \"That's just . . . eww.\"\n\n\"That's illegal, isn't it? How was he able to get away with doing that?\" Jillian turned to Jenna.\n\n\"Yes, it is illegal. Unfortunately, a lot of people won't report it for fear of repercussions, also illegal.\"\n\n\"But doesn't someone inspect these homes to make sure they're fit to live in?\" Jillian asked.\n\n\"They do. Sometimes that just plays into the landlord's hands. The government only pays so much for the apartment rent, whatever the average market rates are. The benefit to the landlord is they can get a low interest loan as long as they designate a certain amount of units for low-income residents. If the landlord accepts the Section Eight housing certificate, he's guaranteed to get his money from the government. Then he doesn't do repairs. The renter reports the landlord. He's given an ultimatum. Either do the repairs or he'll be removed from their list of approved rentals.\" Jenna paused and looked around. \"He doesn't do the repairs and is removed as a valid Section Eight landlord. They remove their tenants. The landlord can now do the repairs and raise the rents.\"\n\n\"And he's gotten the low interest loan.\" Nana Jo pursed her lips and scowled.\n\nJenna nodded.\n\n\"That sounds sordid, but . . .\" I tried to put my thoughts into words.\n\n\"But does it make him a killer?\" Nana Jo asked.\n\nI nodded.\n\n\"Unless, maybe Melody knew something about it and she threatened to turn him in?\" Jillian asked hopefully.\n\nI shook my head. \"No. More likely she knew about it and was helping him.\" I looked tentatively at Dawson, but he didn't seem to be bothered by talk of Melody.\n\n\"What happened to your friend?\" Emma asked Ruby Mae.\n\n\"Once our church found out what was going on, we packed up her stuff and moved her in with one of the members. Things worked out well, and now she's got one of those Habitat homes.\" She smiled. \"That's all I was able to find out.\"\n\nWe turned to look at Dorothy.\n\n\"My date did know a little bit about this Melody person, but he was a bit grabby, so I didn't get as much information out of him as I would have liked.\" She winked. \"I may have to go out with him again to see what else I can get out of him.\"\n\n\"Way to take one for the team,\" Nana Jo said sarcastically.\n\n\"I aim to please.\" Dorothy smiled, then got serious. \"Turns out Melody was in a special program in New Jersey for troubled teens or at-risk kids.\" She rummaged in her purse and pulled out a sheet of paper. \"Higher Ed Restart or some such thing. The way I understand it, some of these kids are really smart but keep getting in trouble. This program gives them an opportunity to go to college. The hope is they'll get a good education and redirect their energy so they use their brains for good rather than evil.\"\n\n\"I think I've read about this program,\" I said. \"When I was a teacher, there was a lot of information floating around about how it's cheaper to send kids to Harvard for four years than it is to prison. Plus, they can learn a skill that's useful and hopefully not end up back in their negative environment. But, I didn't know they were doing it here in North Harbor.\"\n\n\"That's dangerous, isn't it?\" Emma asked tentatively.\n\n\"Harvey said they had very strict criteria,\" Dorothy reassured her. \"No one with a history of violence. No rapists. No murderers. No arsonists. No child molesters.\" She continued to scan her paper. \"He said MISU only took two. Both were older than the traditional students. Melody was one and the other was a guy who was also one of those grifters.\"\n\n\"Seems like they should tell people, you know, warn them,\" Jillian said.\n\n\"They want to give the students the best possible chance for success. The hope is they'll blend in and adapt. Harvey says the program's very successful. There are students placed in universities all over the world.\"\n\nNana Jo tapped info into her iPad.\n\nWe waited until our server finished taking our orders. When all the orders were placed, I told them what I'd learned on campus. Emma and Jillian helped fill in the gaps. I told them about my conversation with the athletic director and plan to talk to the team later.\n\nWhen I was done reporting, I turned to Nana Jo.\n\n\"Freddie's son, Mark, found out that our friend Virgil Russell, spent time in prison for fraud, embezzlement, and\"\u2014she paused\u2014\"manslaughter.\"\n\nEveryone sat up in their chairs and fired questions at the same time.\n\n\"Hold your horses. Virgil was convicted of murdering his partner, a man named . . .\" She scrolled her iPad. \"Here it is, Max Simpson.\"\n\nI gasped. \"Simpson, that's Melody's last name.\"\n\nNana Jo nodded. \"Yep. Max had a daughter.\"\n\n\"Elizabeth Mae Simpson,\" we all said together.\n\nShe nodded.\n\nDawson looked shocked. \"But that's . . .\" He shook his head. \"That's just wrong. He had his hands all over her.\"\n\nI didn't understand that either. \"If he went to jail for murdering her father, it seems odd she'd be having a relationship with him.\"\n\nWe talked until our food arrived, and then we put aside talk of murder until we finished eating. Irma hadn't been able to clean her teeth, so she drank her dinner and had her food placed in a take-out container. She was pretty tipsy and abandoned our group to flirt with a couple of men at the bar.\n\nJenna looked amazed by all of the activity and whispered to me, \"Are they like this all the time?\"\n\nDorothy had joined Irma at the bar and both were drinking like fish. Emma and Jillian looked amused.\n\nI looked at Dorothy and Irma. \"This is nothing. You should see them when they really get revved up.\"\n\nJenna looked as though her eyes would pop out of her head. \"Seriously?\"\n\nI nodded. \"They can be a handful, but they're also amazing at using their connections to collect information.\"\n\nJenna nodded. \"I was impressed. They've found out a lot of information in a short period of time. Today is Thursday. It's only been four days.\"\n\nI thought about that. Had it only been four days? It sure felt like a lot longer. \"Well, Nana Jo gave us a deadline.\"\n\nJenna frowned. \"Deadline?\"\n\nI hid my smile. \"Yeah. She said we needed to have this figured out before next Saturday's game.\"\nChapter 11\n\nDorothy and Irma were too drunk to get home alone. Zaq volunteered to make sure Emma and Jillian arrived safely back on campus. I suspected Zaq had his own motives behind volunteering for taxi service. He and Emma were hitting it off well. I wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth, especially when it freed me up to get the girls back to the retirement village safely. Before they left, Jillian and Emma hugged me.\n\n\"Thank you for dinner and for including us in your investigation,\" Jillian said.\n\nI hugged them both. \"Thank you both. You were very helpful.\"\n\nJillian looked as though she was working up the courage to speak.\n\nEmma poked her in the ribs. \"Ask her.\"\n\n\"Ask me what?\"\n\n\"We wondered if it would be okay if... well, we were hoping maybe\u2014\" Jillian stammered.\n\n\"We wanted to know if we could continue to help investigate,\" Emma finished.\n\nI was surprised. \"Well, I'm not sure.\"\n\n\"Please,\" they begged.\n\n\"We really want to help,\" Emma said. \"After all, even though I didn't like her, she was still my roommate.\"\n\n\"And neither one of us believe Dawson killed her,\" Jillian said.\n\nI'd noticed a few looks between Dawson and Jillian while we were eating. Was something developing? However, I couldn't allow sentimental feelings to influence my judgment. \"Girls, I truly appreciate your willingness to help.\"\n\n\"Why do I sense a 'but' is coming?\" Emma asked.\n\n\"But this may seem like fun and games, but it's serious. Someone killed Melody. The killer may be on campus. If someone thinks you girls are asking questions and suspects you might figure this thing out, you might be in danger.\" I shuddered at the memory of what it felt like to be held at gunpoint during the summer. \"It's too risky, and I can't take the chance you might get hurt.\"\n\n\"But we'll be very careful. There has to be something we can do to help,\" Jillian said.\n\nI thought about it. \"Okay. Here's how you can help.\" I looked seriously at the girls and tried to help them see the gravity of the situation. I turned to Emma. \"As her roommate, maybe you could check with the university to see if anyone will be claiming her things. See if she has any family. Offer to pack up her belongings.\"\n\nEmma nodded eagerly. \"I can do that.\"\n\nI turned to Jillian. \"You can help by organizing a memorial.\"\n\nJillian frowned. \"A memorial?\"\n\nI nodded. \"Yes. Talk to the administration and put up flyers. Maybe a vigil of some sort.\"\n\n\"But I don't see . . .\"\n\n\"Once the memorial is scheduled, then we'll come and observe the people who show up. It's a long shot, but worth a try.\"\n\nJillian's face lit up. \"I get it. You're hoping the murderer will show up.\"\n\n\"Something like that. Actually, I'm hoping we'll run into people who knew her so we can talk to them.\" I looked at both girls. \"Can you do that?\"\n\nThey nodded eagerly.\n\n\"Good. But please be careful. This is very serious, and I don't want the killer to get suspicious.\"\n\nThey gave me their solemn promises to be careful and left with Zaq. I still felt nervous and wondered if I was doing the right thing by involving them. However, something in the back of my mind told me if I didn't give them a job to do, they might go out on their own, which could be more dangerous. This way I hoped to control and protect them, if needed. I shook off the doubt and began the process of corralling the girls. Irma took a bit of persuasion, but we finally convinced her.\n\nAs we were leaving, the manager returned. \"I hope you all enjoyed yourselves.\"\n\n\"Yes. Thank you. The food was very good,\" I said.\n\n\"I'm glad you liked it. I hope you'll come back again soon.\"\n\nEven though I was standing with Nana Jo and Jenna, he stared directly at me.\n\nHeat climbed up my neck. \"I'm sure we will. You're so close.\"\n\nFor some reason, I found it hard to make eye contact and focused on pretty much everything except his eyes.\n\n\"Hi. My name is Josephine Thomas.\" Nana Jo stuck out her hand.\n\n\"Frank Patterson.\" He shook it.\n\n\"Frank, we're glad to meet you. This is my granddaughter Jenna Rutherford, and my other granddaughter Samantha Washington.\"\n\nWe shook.\n\n\"Sam owns Market Street Mysteries down the street. You should swing by sometime and check it out.\" Nana Jo was clearly matchmaking, and the heat in my face intensified.\n\n\"Nana Jo! Everyone doesn't read mysteries,\" I said.\n\nNana Jo smiled. \"Do you like mysteries, Mr. Patterson?\"\n\nHe smiled. \"Actually, I do. I just haven't had much time to read, with opening the restaurant. I hope that changes soon.\"\n\n\"Perhaps your wife might enjoy mysteries?\" Jenna asked with a coy smile.\n\nSubtlety wasn't my family's strong suit. I tried to give Jenna a discreet pinch and prayed the ground would open up and swallow me whole.\n\nFrank Patterson laughed. \"I'm not married. \"\n\n\"Really? A nice-looking man like you? How on earth did you manage to escape?\" Nana Jo joked.\n\nFrank smiled. \"I guess I've been too busy to settle down.\"\n\n\"Sam here is single too. What a coincidence.\"\n\n\"Widow. I'm widowed. I'm sure Mr. Patterson doesn't want to hear about this. Oh my, look at the time.\" I grabbed my grandmother and sister by the arms and propelled them toward the door. \"Thanks for everything. We'll see you around.\"\n\nOutside on the street, I scowled at both of them. \"What exactly do you two think you're doing?\"\n\nThey smirked. \"Who, us?\"\n\n\"Yes. You.\"\n\nNana Jo smiled. \"We're just being neighborly.\"\n\nI huffed and stomped off toward the bookstore and ignored the laughter I heard from behind.\n\nAt the bookstore, the girls picked up a couple more books in the Mrs. Pollifax series, which they'd started reading over the summer. I was happy they enjoyed the series and decided to continue reading it. Although, Irma preferred more sex in her books and had also started reading J. D. Robb's In Death series. I preferred cozy mysteries, which tended not to have sex, violence, or bad language. Knowing J. D. Robb was the pseudonym for romance writer Nora Roberts, I thought there might be enough sex mixed in with the mystery to satisfy Irma. So far, she seemed pretty happy with my recommendation.\n\nAfter their purchases were made, I drove the girls back to the retirement village and headed back to MISU to talk to the football team.\n\nMISU wasn't a large university, so you wouldn't expect the athletic facility to be large either. However, you'd be wrong. The athletic and convocation center was a large facility which hosted not only athletic events for the university but was also a venue for concerts and other entertainment for the community. I remembered coming there as a child to see the circus. The main auditorium had more than five thousand seats. It wasn't as large as JAMU's stadium, which could hold almost ten thousand, but it was still bigger than Carnegie Hall.\n\nBehind the main facility was another smaller building, which was where the security guard directed me to go after I showed my note and driver's license. I parked and followed the signs to the media room.\n\nThe media room looked like a small movie theatre with a large screen that covered an entire wall, a projector, and about one hundred seats. Nearly every seat was taken when I entered. I was at the front of the room and felt like all eyes were directed at me. The lights were low, so I took a minute for my eyes to adjust and then hurried up the stairs to find a seat near the back. I was spotted just as I started to climb.\n\n\"Mrs. Washington?\" a voice boomed from the ceiling.\n\nI froze and looked around but couldn't tell where the voice originated. The lights suddenly came up, and at the top of the theatre, there was a glass booth, just like at the movie theatre. Peter Castleton was waving at me behind the glass and motioned to indicate he was coming down.\n\nI waited where I was until he and Coach Phillips came through a small door and descended the stairs. When they reached me, Peter Castleton did the introductions. \"Samantha Washington, you know Coach Phillips.\"\n\nWe nodded and shook hands.\n\nCoach Phillips was a little taller than me. I estimated his weight at one hundred fifty. I knew from the news that at thirty-seven, he was one of the youngest head football coaches in his division, but given MISU's success during his first season as head coach, he was getting a lot of attention. He always wore a baseball cap, which he tipped when we were introduced. I suspected the cap was an attempt to hide his receding hairline.\n\nThe players watched us in relative silence. Peter Castleton faced the group. \"Guys, this is Mrs. Washington. She's Dawson's friend and has been trying to help clear him. She'd like to ask you all some questions. I know Coach Phillips and I would really appreciate any help you can provide.\"\n\nCoach Phillips and Castleton left, along with some other older men I assumed were assistant coaches. I was facing a room full of large men and for a moment, I felt awkward. However, I took a deep breath and reminded myself of the many years, as a high school teacher, when I spoke to students who were a lot more dangerous and probably a lot less interested in what I had to say.\n\nBefore I could speak, a large guy who looked like a small tank raised his hand. He was at least four hundred pounds.\n\n\"Yes?\"\n\n\"How's Dawg?\"\n\nI scowled. \"Dog? You want to know about my dogs?\" Surely this guy wasn't asking about Snickers and Oreo.\n\nThe group laughed.\n\n\"No. Daaawg? You know, Dawson.\"\n\nReality dawned. \"Oh, I get it. Dawson is . . . hanging in there.\"\n\nHe beat his chest with his fist twice and then repeated the gesture. \"Tell him to stay strong. I don't believe he killed nobody.\" The small tank took his seat.\n\n\"I'm really glad to hear you say that. I don't believe he killed anyone either.\" The English teacher in me couldn't let the grammatical error slide, but it was really the least of my problems. \"That's why I'm here. I'm hoping one of you can tell me something that might help prove he didn't kill her.\"\n\nThey looked around at each other, but no one volunteered any information. Finally, my tank friend raised his hand again. \"How you gonna do that?\"\n\n\"Well, right now, I'm just looking for any information you can tell me about Melody or anyone that might have a reason to want to hurt her.\"\n\nA guy who was smaller than my tank friend, but bigger than a Volkswagen Beetle, said, \"Dat girl was a honey trap. Dawg should a stayed clear.\"\n\n\"Did everyone feel like she was a honey trap?\"\n\nThe guys mumbled amongst themselves. Most nodded.\n\nThe Beetle said, \"She should a stuck with B Ball.\"\n\nSeveral guys laughed\n\n\"What do you mean?\" I asked.\n\n\"She started with the basketball team but got clocked. Guess she decided basketball was too dangerous.\"\n\nThey laughed.\n\n\"Wait. Are you saying she used to date a basketball player?\"\n\n\"Yeah.\"\n\nOne guy who was sitting near the front said, \"Man, I forgot 'bout that.\" He laughed. \"She got whipped.\"\n\nI cringed but quickly wiped all judgment from my face. If I wanted them to be open and honest, I had to create an environment where they felt free to share openly. \"What happened?\"\n\nSeveral guys started talking at once, so I held up a hand. \"One at a time.\"\n\nTank said, \"Well, it must a been right after the winter basketball tournament. The men's team won the tournament and then the honeys started sniffing round. Next thing you know, Melody is hooked up with the star forward, Trammel Braxton.\"\n\nI pulled out a notepad and took notes as quickly as I could.\n\n\"So, I heard one day, Trammel and Melody were out at a party when Tray's girlfriend comes up and coldcocks Melody.\"\n\n\"Girlfriend? I thought Melody was his girlfriend?\" I said.\n\nTank laughed. \"Apparently, so did she. Unfortunately, Trammel forgot to tell his baby mama.\"\n\nThe players laughed.\n\n\"So, this other girl shows up and hits Melody?\"\n\nHe snorted. \"She beat Melody. She beat Trammel. She beat everybody who tried to stop her from beating Trammel and Melody.\"\n\nTank was an excellent storyteller, with great facial expressions and body movements to go along with his tale. He burst into laughter at one point. When he pulled himself together, he said, \"Man, I ain't never seen no woman fight like that. She whooped them like Muhammad Ali whooped Joe Frazier in the Thrilla in Manilla.\"\n\nInside I cringed at the violence. \"Anybody know this slugger's name?\"\n\nThey shook their heads. Tank responded, \"Nahw. You gonna need to get that from Trammel.\"\n\n\"Where might I find this Trammel Braxton?\" I asked.\n\n\"He was staying in those fancy apartments on the lake, but now his girl and baby moved up here, and they're staying in off-campus housing.\"\n\nOne young man who had been relatively quiet throughout most of the conversation finally spoke up. \"I can tell you where he lives.\" He was probably two hundred fifty pounds and about six feet. Compared to the other players, he looked like a shrimp.\n\nI asked a few more questions, but no one had any other suggestions of possible murderers. I wrote my name and e-mail address on a white board near the front of the room. The guys filed out and most sent a message to Dawson to hang tough, stay strong, or some other manly message as they left. Some simply pounded their chest like the tank had earlier in a Tarzan gesture.\n\nThe shrimp stayed until everyone left. He provided directions to Trammel's apartment.\n\nBy the time I got home, it was dark and I felt exhausted. However, I wanted to get some writing done, which would allow my subconscious to sift through the information I'd learned today.\n\nThompkins had mastered the art of silently entering and leaving rooms. He entered the servants' hall and watched Millie and Flossie unobserved for several minutes. Flossie could barely contain herself as she told Millie what she'd seen.\n\nThompkins had heard rumors for years about Lord Charles. He knew Lord Charles was a man given to excess. He ate in excess, drank in excess, and pursued women in excess. However, when he was seen by the maid leaving the room of the Duchess of Windsor in the early morning, this was excessive, even for him.\n\n\"Gawd, you don't say?\"\n\nMillie's shock and surprised expression were everything Flossie could have hoped.\n\n\"And that weren't all.\" Flossie looked around to make sure Mrs. McDuffie wasn't around. \"He was wearing pants, but his shirt was unbuttoned, and he was barefoot and carrying his shoes. He was skulking around like a thief in the night.\"\n\nMillie stared openmouthed. \"Oh my, poor Edward. I wonder if he knows.\"\n\nThompkins had heard enough. He moved forward and coughed.\n\nBoth girls were so engrossed in their conversation they failed to notice his approach.\n\n\"Knows what?\"\n\nHis question caused the girls to jump.\n\n\"Nothing, sir,\" Flossie said.\n\n\"Nonsense. If there's something going on, you need to tell me at once.\"\n\nThompkins had long ago learned the importance of a stern look. He applied it to good use. Flossie shared what she'd seen with the butler.\n\nHe frowned. \"You will not discuss what you've seen with anyone. What happens in this house stays in this house. Do you understand?\"\n\n\"Yes, sir,\" both girls said.\n\n\"Now, get back to work.\"\n\nThe girls turned and returned to their duties.\n\nThompkins went in search of Mrs. McDuffie. He didn't have to search long. As he passed the small room he used as an office, he heard the distinct voice of the housekeeper.\n\n\"Bloomin' 'ell that American upstart has a nerve.\"\n\nThompkins sighed, knocked briefly on the door, and then entered.\n\n\"Your ladyship. I'm sorry. I didn't realize.\" Thompkins started to back out.\n\n\"Good, Thompkins, I'm so glad you're here. Please come in,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\nThe butler entered and closed the door behind him and then stood near the wall.\n\n\"I was just sharing with Mrs. McDuffie the changes the Duchess of Windsor has requested.\"\n\n\"Changes, m'lady?\"\n\n\"Perhaps I should read the request.\" Lady Elizabeth sighed and picked up a sheet of stationary. \"'My dearest Elizabeth.'\"\n\nMrs. McDuffie snorted.\n\n\"'You've been a real doll for opening your home for my little gathering. As you can see from the guest list, there's a lot at stake, so I know you won't be offended if I make a few small changes.'\" Lady Elizabeth scanned the pages and then passed them to Mrs. McDuffie. \"Perhaps you had better read them yourself.\"\n\nMrs. McDuffie picked up the pages and read. \"She wants everyone's rooms changed.\" She scanned on. \"What bloody cheek. She wants that little tart of a maid moved to the blue room what looks out over the back garden.\" Mrs. McDuffie slammed the paper down. \"Well, I'll not do it. I'll not move 'Is Grace out of 'is large room for the likes of that little French strumpet.\"\n\nThompkins coughed gently. \"May I?\" He picked up the pages and read them. Then he gently placed the pages on the table and pulled out his hand kerchief and wiped his hands. He turned to Lady Elizabeth and coughed. \"If that is what your ladyship would like done, then, of course, we will honor your wishes, but . . .\"\n\n\"Yes, Thompkins?\"\n\n\"Well, in addition to the duke's room being slightly larger than the other rooms, it is also closest to the stairs. It is a large help to the staff not to have to carry His Grace's luggage down the hall.\" Thompkins's lips twitched. \"I'm not as young as I used to be.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled. \"Thank you, Thompkins. I appreciate what you're trying to do.\" Lady Elizabeth sighed. \"I'm okay with permitting the maid to stay near the duchess, if that's what she wants. Do you think the other servants will mind?\"\n\nMrs. McDuffie snorted. \"No one will be missing that uppity little piece of baggage. You'd think she's the ruddy duchess, the way she carries on.\" Mrs. McDuffie stuck her nose in the air and looked down it.\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled at the housekeeper. She looked at the letter again, and her smile vanished. \"Well, that's good, but I agree James shouldn't have to sacrifice his room. He's practically family. I don't really care about the others.\"\n\n\"But it's highly unusual to have women in rooms immediately next to the men, especially when there are connecting doors,\" Thompkins said.\n\n\"I expect having men and women in separate wings is very old fashioned,\" Lady Elizabeth said. \"I suppose it's a sign of the changing times. We shall have to trust that everyone will behave themselves and there won't be any . . . inappropriate behavior.\"\n\nThompkins coughed discreetly and proceeded to tell Lady Elizabeth about the conversation he just had with the two housemaids.\n\nMrs. McDuffie stared openedmouthed. \"Cor blimey.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth looked from the butler to the housekeeper. \"Do you believe them?\"\n\nMrs. McDuffie's chest heaved and Lady Elizabeth held up a hand to stem her ire. \"I'm sure the girls are very honest and trustworthy. I just mean . . . It just seems so . . . I mean it isn't at all what I expected.\"\n\nMrs. McDuffie nodded. \"I see what you mean. Lord Chitterly isn't the type of man a woman would risk wrecking 'er marriage for?\"\n\n\"Something like that,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\nMrs. McDuffie nodded. \"Agreed. You mark my words that one isn't about to risk a king for the likes of tubby Lord Chitterly.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth suppressed a smile. \"I agree with your assessment.\" She picked up the letter and reread it. \"I won't move James. I'll come up with some excuse, but I see no good reason why we shouldn't do the other moves she requested. However, I want to talk to James before we do anything.\" Lady Elizabeth stood. \"So please hold off on the moves until I've had a chance to talk to him.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth found James in the library.\n\nHe read the note and scowled. \"Well, I don't see how it can do any harm, and I'll be happy to move if it\u2014\"\n\nShe held up her hand. \"Please don't feel you have to move. Actually, my housekeeper has flatly refused to move you out of the larger bedroom in favor of . . . 'that French tart.'\"\n\nJames laughed. \"I'll bet that got a reaction out of old Thompkins.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled. \"Almost, but he maintained his composure. For the peace of my household staff, I shall have to insist you retain your bedroom.\"\n\n\"I want you to know how much I appreciate you agreeing to do this.\" James hesitated for a moment. \"I think you can see how important this is, not only for Great Britain but for the entire world.\"\n\n\"I can, but . . . well, I have to admit I'm slightly confused. I can't believe the king and Parliament are in favor of this . . . gathering.\"\n\nJames was silent for several minutes and then stood. \"If you're asking if this assembly is being done at the king's request, the answer is no.\"\n\n\"But then why?\"\n\n\"Britain's still a free country. We can't prevent people from attending house parties. The country's still recovering from the war and no one wants another one. If there is a peaceful way to prevent it, all the better.\"\n\n\"But you don't believe there is?\"\n\nJames thought for a moment and then shook his head. \"No. I don't. But, there are people like Mary Astor and the 'Cliveden set' who have been trying to negotiate peace.\"\n\n\"Peace, but at what cost?\"\n\n\"Exactly. Britain can't stand by helplessly with her hands behind her back while Hitler ravages Europe.\" James smoked. \"Plus, word is starting to trickle down about Hitler's true intentions.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth waited for him to continue, but he seemed far away. When he finally returned, he shook himself. \"But I hope you understand why this is so important. We needed to find out what was going on. That's why . . .\"\n\n\"That's why you needed them to come here.\"\n\n\"They never would have come to my estate. I'm a bit too close to the throne, I'm afraid. When we heard the duchess was planning this gathering, we needed it to be at a place where we could have access without seeming to condone it. We had heard Lady Emerald Cunard was looking for a country estate for the occasion, but thankfully, she was unable to secure it in time.\"\n\n\"I see. We have a large estate and we're cousins, so we're family, but not too close.\"\n\nJames nodded. \"Exactly.\"\n\n\"Plus, William isn't overly involved in politics, which means the duchess can take all of the . . . credit should a deal be made.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth folded the letter from the duchess. \"I had better instruct the staff to move forward with moving the guests' bedrooms. Everything should be done by the time you all return from shooting.\" She stood and headed to the door. One hand on the door, she turned back. \"James, please be careful. I have a bad feeling about this.\"\n\nEventually, the shooting party left. There were twelve in all. Geoffrey Fordham-Baker elected to remain in the library with a bottle of scotch. Lady Elizabeth and Lady Penelope also chose to forego the shooting. Thompkins brought the tea tray into the library. Geoffrey Fordham Baker snored in a chair in the cor ner while the ladies drank tea.\n\n\"I am rather surprised Daphne chose to go shooting,\" Penelope said.\n\nLady Elizabeth sipped her tea. \"Well, she is rather a good shot.\"\n\n\"I know. She was always a much better shot than me, but she never really seemed to enjoy the cold, the mud, or anything else about it.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled. \"I know what you mean. She did buy a new outfit, and James hasn't seen how well she can shoot.\"\n\nPenelope smiled. \"True. You know, she isn't really as vain and frivolous as she seems.\"\n\n\"Well, she may be vain, but she has brains and I think she's found a reason to use them.\"\n\n\"What do you mean?\"\n\nLady Elizabeth set down her cup and took out her knitting. \"Well, I believe she is truly in love for the first time, and I think she realizes that a duke needs a wife who can be a credit to him in his career. James isn't just part of the idle rich. He's an important person with political aspirations, and I think she realizes his wife will need to do more than host tea parties and look pretty.\"\n\nPenelope stared at her aunt. \"I think you're right. I really do hope things work out between them.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth paused in her knitting. \"I just hope this weekend doesn't backfire.\"\n\n\"I've had an awful feeling about this whole thing. I know Victor is worried too. He thinks\u2014\"\n\nLady Penelope never got an opportunity to say what Victor thought because, at that minute, Thompkins abruptly entered the library.\n\n\"Excuse me, your ladyship, but there has been a terrible accident.\"\n\n\"What kind of accident?\" Lady Elizabeth asked.\n\n\"Someone's been shot.\"\n\nAll color left Penelope's face. \"Victor?\"\n\n\"No, m'lady. I believe it's the Duchess of Windsor.\"\n\nChapter 12\n\nI stayed up late writing and my brain wasn't functioning on all cylinders, even after two cups of coffee. At least that was my excuse. If I'd been well rested when my sister called and asked what I was doing today, I would have asked why before responding. I'd learned to be cautious with Jenna over the years. When the twins were younger, that question would have been followed up with a request to babysit while she went to the movies, a concert, or shopping. Rarely did the question what are you doing include an invitation to the interesting activity. Of course, now the twins were adults, her previous requests for babysitting were now replaced with requests to take her place with unpleasant activities she had committed to do with our mom; I have a really important court case I have to prep for and was wondering if you could take Mom to the license bureau\/dentist\/podiatrist \/etc. My sleep-deprived state was the reason I was now sitting at the police station. Part of her negotiations to get me to come included a large turtle caramel nut latte and a glazed donut from a gourmet coffee shop.\n\nI sipped my expensive coffee in the same room Nana Jo and I had sat in just five days earlier. \"I'm not sure why you need me here.\"\n\n\"I've never met this A-squared person. You have a relationship with him.\"\n\nI nearly choked. \"A relationship? He broke into my store and got into a fight with Dawson. I hardly call that a relationship.\"\n\n\"It's more interaction than I've had.\" She sipped her tea. \"Besides, he looks sleazy.\"\n\nI stared at her. \"You're at the police station. He's not likely to attack you.\"\n\n\"I'm not worried about him attacking me. I can take care of myself. I just don't want to be alone with him.\"\n\n\"If you're looking for a bodyguard, you should have invited Nana Jo. She's the one who's packing heat.\"\n\nWe both grinned.\n\nA police officer escorted A-squared into the conference room. \"You want me to stay?\"\n\nJenna shook her head. \"No, you can leave.\"\n\nHe nodded. \"You know the drill. Call if you need us.\"\n\nAlex Alexander, or A-squared, looked the same as he did on television. He was dirty. His clothes and hair were greasy. He smelled like a distillery, sweat, and vomit, which made the room seem even smaller.\n\n\"So, what can I do for you?\" He propped his feet on the table and leaned back in his chair with his hands behind his head. The maneuver released a musk which had been trapped under his armpits, and I fought the desire to gag.\n\n\"The first thing you can do is put your arms down. You stink,\" Jenna said.\n\nA-squared laughed and I thought he wasn't going to do it. I gave him my sternest schoolmarm stare, which did wonders with derelicts and delinquents. Jenna might not have been a teacher, but she had a fierce lawyer stare that caused criminals to cower in their boots. At least it made me want to cower. The combination seemed to work because he lowered his arms and chair and removed his feet.\n\n\"Thank you,\" Jenna said.\n\n\"Who're you?\"\n\n\"My name is Jenna Rutherford. I'm the lawyer representing your son. He asked me to talk to you.\"\n\n\"Yeah? What about?\"\n\n\"Well, he's concerned about you. He saw you on television and\u2014\"\n\n\"He saw that?\" He laughed. \"I was pretty good, huh? I'm a movie star. I saw him on television last night too. Not too flattering to his ole man, but . . .\" He shrugged. \"Everybody needs fifteen minutes of fame.\"\n\n\"Mr. Alexander, I\u2014\"\n\n\"Call me A-squared. Everybody does. Alex Alexander. Get it? A-squared.\"\n\nJenna was frustrated. \"Okay. A-squared, your son is concerned because you implied you know who murdered Melody.\"\n\n\"Yep.\"\n\n\"You need to tell the police. This is a dangerous game you're playing,\" she said.\n\nHe smiled. \"I'll be happy to tell the police everything.\" He paused and leaned forward. \"But there has to be somethin' in it for me.\"\n\n\"Mr. . . . ah, A-squared. If you know who killed Melody Hardwick, you need to tell someone. It's illegal to withhold information about a felony.\"\n\nHe shook himself. \"Oooh, I'm shakin' in my boots. What're they gonna do, arrest me?\"\n\n\"The police are not going to pay you to tell them who killed Melody Hardwick. What they're going to do is throw your butt in jail and leave you there.\"\n\n\"Won't be the first time.\" He stretched. \"Three hots and a cot.\"\n\nJenna's face could be very expressive. She stared at me with a \"can you believe this idiot\" look.\n\nI tried to get through to him. \"You have to see this is a dangerous business you're playing at. There's a killer out there who thinks you know who he or she is. You could be in danger.\"\n\n\"I can take care of myself. Been doin' it my whole life.\"\n\n\"The police believe Dawson killed her. If you don't tell them what you know, he could get convicted for murder.\" I doubted he possessed any parental emotions, especially considering how he'd beaten Dawson, but he was definitely concerned about money. \"And, if he's convicted for murder, there goes all hope of a professional football career.\"\n\nHe shook his head. \"Never happen. I'll never let my boy get hooked for a crime he didn't commit. That's why I went on TV. Besides, he's got you.\" He pointed toward Jenna. \"It's your job to get him off.\"\n\nJenna stared at him as though she'd like nothing better than to leap over that table and throttle him. Instead she said, \"Even the best lawyers can't guarantee an acquittal.\"\n\n\"He's not goin' to jail.\" He tapped his chest. \"I got a plan that'll set us up for the rest of our lives.\"\n\nJenna narrowed her eyes. \"I hope you don't mean what I think you mean.\"\n\nHe laughed. \"No idea what you're talkin' 'bout, but I think we're done with this little talk.\" He stood.\n\n\"Don't you want to know how your son is doing?\" I asked.\n\nA-squared turned to face me and grinned. \"How could he be anything but great with you two lookin' after him. Besides, you would a told me if he weren't okay.\"\n\nJenna buzzed for the police and they came promptly and removed A-squared.\n\nWe sat for several moments and stared at each other. Then we spontaneously burst into laughter.\n\n\"If I hadn't seen this with my own eyes, I wouldn't believe it,\" Jenna said.\n\n\"He's like a caricature of a real human being.\"\n\n\"That's why I wanted you here. I'm an attorney and I've dealt with some real lowlifes over the years. But this guy takes the cake.\" She paused. \"Let's get out of here.\"\n\nWe left the police station and went to a nearby coffee shop. Jenna needed a tea refill. We sat at a small table near the window and picked up our conversation where we'd left off.\n\n\"I've been thinking about why A-squared bothers me so much. I think this whole thing bothers me more because of Dawson.\"\n\n\"I know what you mean. It's different when you know the people personally.\"\n\nShe nodded. \"I can distance myself from my clients, but this is very different. Dawson is practically family. Heck, he is family.\"\n\nI allowed myself a moment of misty-eyed sentimentality and then my phone buzzed. It was a text message from Jillian informing me she had coordinated a memorial service for Melody for tomorrow.\n\nI told Jenna about the memorial service and immediately received another text. This one was from Emma. She'd received a text from a woman named Cassidy Logan claiming to be Melody's half sister.\n\nI read the text to Jenna.\n\n\"Half sister? Nana Jo didn't mention anything about a half sister.\"\n\n\"I know. I don't think Emma should meet with anyone alone. I'm going to tell her to hold off before responding.\" I typed the response and received an Okay.\n\n\"This is odd. I don't\u2014\"\n\nMy phone vibrated again.\n\n\"You're awfully popular,\" Jenna said.\n\nI looked at my phone and my heart skipped a beat. \"I totally forgot.\"\n\n\"Forgot what?\"\n\nI paused and took a deep breath before responding. \"I forgot I agreed to meet someone.\"\n\nI'm not sure if it was the blood I could feel rushing up my neck or the fact I was struggling to make eye contact that gave me away.\n\n\"Who did you agree to meet?\" Jenna asked with a smirk.\n\n\"Just a professor I met on campus yesterday.\" I hurried to add, \"He was one of Melody's professors, and I questioned him about her. He's British. So, I thought maybe he could help me with some of the details for my book. It's always good if I can add real details,\" I babbled.\n\n\"Hmm, a British professor. Interesting.\" Jenna grinned and sipped her tea.\n\n\"I barely know the guy. It's just research. That's all.\"\n\n\"'The lady doth protest too much, methinks.'\" Jenna quoted Shakespeare and took another sip of her tea.\n\nI stuck out my tongue.\n\nShe laughed but then leaned forward and stared. \"Where is he taking you for this . . . ah . . . research?\"\n\nI looked at my phone. \"I don't know.\"\n\n\"I hope you're going to do something about your hair.\"\n\n\"What's wrong with my hair?\"\n\n\"Do you want it straight or sugarcoated?\"\n\nI stared at my sister. \"Sugarcoated.\"\n\n\"Well, it's dull and lifeless. You've got split ends and the style does nothing for your face. Your eyebrows need to be arched. Most people have two. Yours are so thick and bushy you look like Oscar the Grouch. Plus, your makeup needs to come into the twenty-first century.\"\n\n\"If that's the sugarcoated version, I'd hate to hear it straight.\"\n\n\"The truth will set you free.\"\n\n\"The King James Version says 'the truth will MAKE you free,' not set.\"\n\n\"Whatever.\"\n\nMy feelings were hurt by Jenna's comments, but my sister was honest if nothing else\u2014brutally honest. I wanted to lash out and say something critical about the way she looked, but I couldn't. Her hair and makeup were always flawless. Jenna never wore much makeup, but she always looked polished and professional. With no way to relieve the sting of her words, I resorted to sulking. \"It's not a date.\"\n\n\"It doesn't matter whether it's a date or not. You don't have to do your hair and makeup to impress a man. You should do it for yourself. You used to dress better and take care of yourself, but ever since Leon died, you've just let yourself go.\"\n\n\"You've been talking to Mom.\"\n\n\"Doesn't mean it isn't true.\" She smiled kindly. \"Look, your birthday is coming up and I was going to suggest we do a spa day. Why don't we do things a little early and see if we can get a little pampering. My treat.\"\n\n\"Geez. I must really look bad if you want to send me on a spa day.\"\n\n\"I'm pleading the fifth.\"\n\nJenna picked up her phone and made a few calls. She got us both in for manicures and pedicures, plus a hair and makeup session for me and a massage for herself.\n\n* * *\n\nNorth Harbor Spa was a beautifully relaxing facility located atop the North Harbor Inn. North Harbor only had fifteen thousand people. The location on the shores of Lake Michigan and the addition of the new senior professional golf course had made the town a popular summer vacation spot, despite its economically depressed condition. Small boutique hotels dotted the coastline. North Harbor Inn was a newer building and this was my first time going inside.\n\nOn a rare instance when I splurged for a manicure, I went to a small beauty college. The technicians weren't licensed, but prices were low. Results weren't optimal, but I didn't expect much for five dollars. According to Jenna, the experience of being pampered was worth the extra money. Here, soft music played in the background. No televisions were tuned to soap operas or Jerry Springer, and the pedicure chairs weren't lined up against the wall like suspects in a police lineup.\n\nJenna exaggerated when she accused me of having the Oscar the Grouch unibrow, but it had been a long time since I'd last arched them. My brows were thick and in need of pruning.\n\nJenna introduced me to her hairdresser and gave her carte blanche to make me beautiful.\n\nMarika laughed at the look of terror in my eyes. \"Don't worry. I take good care of you. I won't do anything to you I wouldn't do to myself.\"\n\nI was even more terrified since her hair was electric blue and cut into an asymmetrical bob and shaved on one side. I decided to trust her. Jenna's hair looked nice. Marika permed, colored, conditioned, cut the split ends, and styled my hair. The dye hid my gray and she used caramel highlights. Between the brow waxing and hair change, my eyes looked huge. I barely recognized myself in the mirror and couldn't help smiling. My hair had bounce and shine and was so soft I kept touching it.\n\nBy the time the makeup artist came by, I was excited. She asked me a few questions about my daily makeup routine and then went to work. She explained everything as she went along and by the time she'd finished, I looked ten years younger. Neutral foundation and lip gloss with a smoky eye shadow that made my brown eyes pop.\n\nI looked like me, only better. Best of all, I felt beautiful. Both Jenna and I were pleased with the final results.\n\n\"You look awesome.\"\n\nI was in danger of bursting into tears, so I hugged my sister and whispered, \"Thank you.\"\n\nShe smiled. \"Happy birthday. Now, you're ready for your not-a-date research dinner.\"\n\nI felt guilty for taking a half day on pampering, but I kept looking at myself in the mirror and smiling as I drove to MISU.\n\nEmma and I were scheduled to meet at the student union. I found her sitting at a table by the window.\n\n\"Wow. You look amazing. I almost didn't recognize you.\"\n\nI laughed. \"Thank you.\" I sat down. \"I think.\"\n\n\"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply that you\u2014\"\n\nI held up my hand. \"No need to apologize. Now, tell me about this half sister, Cassidy Logan.\"\n\n\"I'm afraid I don't know much.\" Emma pulled out her phone. \"I did what you suggested and reached out to the university about her belongings. They gave her my number and she sent me a text.\" Emma pulled up the text message on her phone.\n\nI read the string. \"Doesn't sound like she and Melody were very close.\" I scrolled back and reread it, trying not to read tone into the sparse words.\n\n\"Nope. Sure doesn't. I mean if my sister was murdered, I'd be a basket case. I don't think I'd be asking for an inventory of her belongings so I can determine if it's worth my while to come pick them up.\"\n\n\"Well, she is a half sister,\" I said weakly.\n\nEmma shrugged. \"So.\"\n\n\"She said they weren't close.\"\n\n\"What do you want me to do?\" she asked.\n\nI pondered the question. \"She's in Chicago. That's only an hour and a half away. Tell her you have a friend who will bring the items to her if she'll send you the address.\"\n\nEmma picked up her phone and sent the message. We didn't have to wait long for the reply.\n\n\"She sent her address.\" Emma forwarded the message to me.\n\nWe went back to her dorm room and packed away Melody's few belongings. It seemed sad that all of her worldly goods fit into an old backpack Emma said she didn't need any longer. I thought about Melody and wondered where she kept her other belongings. Each time I'd seen her, she had on a different outfit and a lot of makeup. I put the backpack in my car. Since I was on campus, I decided to swing by the off-campus housing and pay a visit to Trammel Braxton.\n\nConstruction at MISU was never ending. Buildings were erected, renovated, or remodeled constantly. A few years ago, the off-campus housing for married couples and graduate students looked like a smaller version of Chicago's Cabrini-Green housing projects during the 1970s. The last of those buildings were demolished in 2011 and the MISU buildings met the same fate a couple of years ago. The new buildings looked like East Coast brownstone row houses with brick fronts and porches.\n\nI found the one I wanted, parked, and tried to come up with a plausible cover story. I finally came up with something and got out of the car. I was so focused on the story running through in my head I was oblivious to everything else. As I got to the sidewalk, I was blindsided by a child on a Big Wheel being chased by a golden retriever and a very pregnant woman.\n\nI avoided falling over by holding onto the Big Wheel. I held on until the child's mother caught up.\n\nShe was breathing heavily from hurrying down the street. \"I'm so sorry. I hope he didn't hurt you. He just broke away from me and in my condition, I couldn't catch him.\" She looked extremely young, not more than eighteen with a dark olive complexion and dark hair and eyes.\n\n\"No harm done.\" I smiled. \"He's adorable.\"\n\nThe boy was extremely cute. He had dark skin and jet-black curly hair, dark eyes, and chubby cheeks.\n\nShe smiled. \"Thank you.\" She turned to the boy. \"Now it's nap time.\"\n\nHe let out a howl and would have taken off again if I hadn't bent down and scooped him up.\n\n\"You're going to be a good boy for your mama,\" I said in a soothing voice, which might have worked if the mother hadn't reached to take him.\n\nHe immediately started to kick and squirm.\n\nI gasped, afraid he'd kick her stomach, but she must have been accustomed to this behavior because she turned to avoid a direct frontal kick just in time. She grabbed him by the waist and pulled, but my new companion must have also known what was coming because he wrapped both hands tightly around my neck and refused to let go, regardless of how much the mother pulled.\n\nI winced as he grasped my hair in addition to my neck. \"Maybe it would be better if I carried him in for you?\" I suggested. \"You seem to have your hands full, and I think two heads are better than one in this situation.\"\n\nThe little mother looked at me tentatively. However, I must have passed her scrutiny of not being a crazed child-napping serial killer because she nodded and gave a polite smile.\n\n\"If you're sure you don't mind?\" She reached down and picked up the golden's leash and the Big Wheel while she balanced a large diaper bag on her other shoulder.\n\n\"I don't mind at all.\" I looked around. \"Just lead the way.\" I stepped aside to allow her to get in front. I hid my surprise when she went to the wrought iron fence in front of me and walked up the stairs. This was the home of Trammel Braxton, just where I wanted to go.\n\nShe unlocked the door and stepped aside for me to enter. The living room was sparsely furnished with a cheap sofa in front of the window, two foldaway chairs, and a massive flat panel television with cords and controllers hanging off like tentacles on an octopus.\n\nShe put down the Big Wheel and released the dog from his leash and then tried again to get her son away from me. However, he still wasn't ready to let go and let out a bloodcurdling scream, which would have the neighbors believing a murder was occurring.\n\nAn embarrassed flush rose up her neck and she had a determined set to her eyes and chin which wouldn't bode well for the little guy if he didn't release me soon.\n\n\"Perhaps you'll let me put him to bed. I could read him a story.\" I tried to pull away far enough to look into his eyes. \"Would you like me to read you a story?\"\n\n\"Yes.\" He sniffed.\n\nShe nodded and led the way upstairs to a small nursery.\n\nThe nursery was decorated in a superhero theme with Superman soaring overhead through clouds which had been painted onto the ceiling. The room had a crib, dresser, rocker, and large rug. The floor was littered with toys. One wall had a small bookshelf and there were several books I remembered reading to my nephews when they were small. I turned sideways so my new appendage could see the books. \"Which book do you want me to read?\"\n\nHe looked up and pointed to a book which looked to have seen a lot of wear if the frayed corners and crayon marks were any indication.\n\n\"Panda Bear's Paint Box. I remember reading this to my nephews when they were little boys, just like you.\" I picked up the book and walked over to the rocker. I sat down. My companion turned so he could sit and see the pages of the book. He stuck his thumb in his mouth and leaned back against my chest as I read.\n\nIf the mother had hesitations about me, I think they evaporated as she watched me rock and read to her son. He was asleep before I finished the last page and I quietly got up and walked to the crib. I gently placed him in the crib and pulled the covers up over him.\n\n\"He's out like a light,\" I whispered.\n\nShe looked at her son and smiled. \"He'll sleep like the dead now,\" she said in her normal tone. She turned to me. \"Thank you.\"\n\n\"It was my pleasure.\"\n\nWe left the room and went downstairs.\n\n\"He's normally so good, but lately, he has fits and tantrums.\" She rubbed her belly. \"Especially now he knows I'm slower and can't react as fast as before.\" She looked at me. \"I do appreciate your help. I don't even know your name.\"\n\n\"My name's Samantha Washington, but, please, call me Sam.\"\n\nShe smiled. \"Thank you, Sam. I'm Mariana Braxton.\"\n\nShe walked to the door to let me out. \"I hope we didn't keep you.\"\n\n\"Actually, I was coming to see you and your husband, Trammel, that is.\"\n\nShe stopped and stared. \"Do we know you?\"\n\n\"No. I was hoping you could help me.\"\n\nShe looked skeptical and folded her arms across her chest. \"Well, Trammel isn't here at the moment. Maybe you'd prefer to come back when he is.\" Her voice and body language indicated all barriers were now up and in place, and if I didn't do something quick, I'd be outside in less than two seconds.\n\n\"Mrs. Braxton, could I sit down for one moment? I just want to ask you a few questions and then I'll leave. I promise.\"\n\nWhether it was the sincerity in my eyes or memories of me holding her son, it worked. She nodded and indicated I could sit on the sofa. She pulled over a folding chair and sat.\n\n\"Would you prefer\u2014\"\n\nShe waved away my protest. \"It's a lot easier for me to get up and down on this chair than it is on that sofa.\" She patted her stomach. \"Now, what questions do you want to ask me?\"\n\nI settled back down. \"Well, I'm a friend of Dawson Alexander.\"\n\nShe had a vacant look on her face that indicated she had no idea who Dawson Alexander was.\n\n\"He's the football player accused of killing Melody Hardwick.\"\n\nBased on the way she pursed her lips and rolled her eyes, it was clear she recognized Melody's name. \"What do you want from me, a medal?\"\n\n\"He didn't do it. Dawson didn't kill her. I was hoping you could help me figure out who might want her dead.\"\n\n\"Other than me, you mean?\" She rose from her chair. \"If you think I killed that gold digger, you've got another think coming.\"\n\n\"Please, Mrs. Braxton. I'm not accusing you of killing her.\" I pointed to her stomach. \"It's pretty clear that would be impossible in your condition.\"\n\nThat settled her down and she returned to her seat. I wasn't so naive as to believe a pregnant woman couldn't have killed someone, but Melody was in pretty good shape and would have put up a struggle.\n\n\"Well, I don't know how you think I can help.\"\n\n\"Just tell me what you know about Melody. I'm trying to understand her character and so few people know anything about her. No one was really close to her. I was hoping you . . .\" I looked down. \"Or your husband might be able to tell me something that might help prevent an innocent man from paying for a crime he didn't commit.\"\n\nShe settled back. \"I only saw her once. If you're here, someone told you what happened.\"\n\nI nodded. \"Yes, but I'd like to hear your side of the story, if you don't mind sharing.\"\n\nShe took a deep breath. \"Trammel and I dated in high school. That's when I got pregnant with our son. Tray was a star basketball player, the best in the state. He got offers all over the country, but he came to MISU because it was close by. I was two years behind him in school and my parents wanted me to finish high school. He came home to see me almost every weekend when he didn't have a game, especially after the baby was born. He loved little Tray.\" She smiled. \"We were going to get married as soon as he graduated. But his sophomore year he stopped calling and didn't visit as much. I got suspicious. He said everything was fine. He was just tired or studying. But he was never that into books. All he ever wanted was to play ball. So, I came to see for myself.\" She paused. \"At first his roommate didn't want to tell me where he was, but he finally did. They were together and she was all over him.\" Her face hardened. \"I snapped. I tried to beat the crap out of her. How dare she think she was gonna come and take my man.\" She took several seconds to recapture her composure. \"I'd invested years into that man. He wasn't about to leave me and our son for some no-account gold digger. Oh, no.\" Her chest heaved and her eyes flashed. \"So, yeah, I tried to kill her. It took Trammel and two other men to pull me off her.\"\n\n\"What happened next?\"\n\n\"I told Trammel if he thought he was about to leave me and our son for her, then he was next. I was so angry.\"\n\n\"I can understand that.\"\n\n\"Trammel apologized. He had a good thing and if he didn't want to lose me, he better straighten up and fly right.\" She smiled.\n\n\"That's when you moved here?\"\n\n\"He said he didn't want anyone but me, and we got married a couple weeks later. I figured it would be better if I was here on campus in case anyone else tried to get their claws on my man.\"\n\n\"And you never saw Melody again?\"\n\nShe shook her head. \"Probably a good thing too.\"\n\nI hesitated but decided I needed the truth. \"Do you know if Trammel saw her again?\"\n\nShe shook her head. \"I don't think so. I told him if I heard he so much as looked at her again, I'd beat both of them next time.\" She giggled.\n\n\"Do you know of anyone else that might have wanted to kill her?\"\n\nShe thought for a minute. \"Not unless she tried to take somebody else's man.\"\n\nI thanked Mrs. Braxton for her help and left. It was getting late and I still needed to get dressed for my non-date.\n\nWhen I returned to the bookstore, Chris and Zaq were closing up for the day.\n\nNana Jo stopped sweeping and stared. \"Sam. You look amazing. I love the hair.\"\n\nChris and Zaq seconded the compliments, which gave a huge boost to my ego.\n\nThere was only one customer in the store. When he turned around, I saw it was Frank Patterson, the owner of the restaurant down the street.\n\n\"Sam, you remember Frank.\" Nana Jo smiled as she guided Mr. Patterson toward me. \"Doesn't Sam look beautiful?\"\n\nI tried to kill my grandmother with my eyes, but I hadn't yet mastered that trick. So, I scowled at her and then plastered a fake smile on my face.\n\nHe had a hand full of books and juggled them to shake hands. \"Yes. She looks lovely.\"\n\n\"Are you a mystery lover, Mr. Patterson?\"\n\n\"Please, call me Frank,\" he said. \"Well, I don't know if I'd say I like mysteries as much as thrillers. Are those the same?\"\n\n\"Not always, although they can be. Every mystery doesn't have to be a thriller, but it can be.\"\n\n\"I tend to go for spy stories. I like Ian Fleming and John Le Carr\u00e9.\"\n\nI indicated the pile of books in his arms. \"I see Nana Jo has introduced you to a few new authors.\" I glanced at the titles of the books in his arms. \"Have you read Marc Cameron? I think you might like him.\"\n\nWe spent a little time talking about thrillers, and he purchased his books. Frank Patterson was a nice man. If I were interested in dating, I would consider him. However, I wasn't dating, so the point was moot. When he was gone and the store locked up, I hurried upstairs and quickly went through practically everything in my closet trying to find something to wear to my non-date. The restaurant Professor Quin had selected wasn't super fancy but it was nicer than most of my clothes. Jeans and a nice shirt would be appropriate or a dress. But, a dress might imply I was looking at this as more than just a research non-date opportunity. I didn't want to look too eager, nor did I want to look slovenly. My new hair and makeup made my clothes look shabby. However, I did have one nice pair of jeans, a gift from Jenna two birthdays ago. They fit beautifully, but I rarely wore them. I could tell they were expensive and I'd saved them for special occasions. Tonight qualified.\n\nI also had a pair of nice wedge shoes I loved because they were comfortable with a peep toe, which would show just enough of my pedicure and also raised me high enough that my jeans didn't drag the ground. My bottom half was set, but my shirts were faded out or stained. I was just about to give up and change to a dress when I noticed the pink bag at the back of my closet. I dug it out and found the cashmere sweater my mother shamed me into buying. I pulled the white cashmere sweater on and looked at myself in the mirror. The sweater looked fantastic with the dark-washed jeans and wedges. It was soft and felt like silk against my skin. It hugged my curves without being too tight and landed at just the right place on my hips.\n\nI went into the kitchen. Nana Jo and Dawson sat at the table. When Dawson came to live with me, he had been on academic probation. As a former mathematics teacher, Nana Jo tutored him in math while I tutored him in English.\n\nNana Jo whistled like a New Yorker hailing a cab. \"Wow, you look great. I don't think I've ever seen you wear that sweater before. Is it new?\"\n\n\"Yeah. Mom talked me into getting it last Sunday.\" Was it only a week ago that I'd gone shopping with my mom? A lot had happened in a short period of time.\n\n\"Well, she was right. That sweater looks divine. Is that cashmere?\" She rubbed it. \"Yep. You can always tell the real stuff.\"\n\n\"You look amazing Mrs. W,\" Dawson said.\n\nThe compliments boosted my courage. I left with a smile and headed to my non-date research dinner.\n\n* * *\n\nLake Michigan Grill was a South Harbor restaurant located near the beach. It was only about a mile from my building. We'd agreed to meet at the restaurant and he was there when I arrived.\n\n\"You look lovely,\" he said. \"I like your hair.\"\n\n\"Thank you. My sister thought I needed a makeover.\"\n\n\"Well, I like both versions.\" He smiled.\n\nThe hostess showed us to our table.\n\nHe ordered a glass of wine when the waitress came by. I wasn't much of a wine drinker, but Lake Michigan Grill served one of the local wines made just up the road. The climate and soil on the southwestern shore of Lake Michigan made it an ideal location for winemaking. One of our local wines was even served at the White House. I ordered the Classic Demi-sec.\n\n\"Professor Quin, I really appreciate your agreeing to help me with my research.\"\n\n\"Please, call me Harley.\" He smiled.\n\nI was thankful the lighting was dim because my face became heated. Thirty-something-year-old women shouldn't blush when they went out on non-dates.\n\n\"Thank you, Harley. Please call me Sam.\" I pulled a small notebook out of my purse. \"Now, I've been thinking about what questions to ask you.\"\n\n\"Certainly. Perhaps you should start by telling me a little about the book you're writing.\"\n\nSo I did. He asked a lot of questions and I found myself doing the majority of the talking. The waitress came and took our orders and he asked more questions. Normally, I didn't talk about my writing. It was still very private, but Harley asked the right types of questions. He knew a lot about mysteries and was an Agatha Christie fan. I could talk about mysteries for hours and found that I had. Several hours later, I looked over and noticed we were the last people in the restaurant and the staff was waiting patiently for us to leave.\n\n\"What time is it?\"\n\nHe looked at his watch. \"Eleven thirty.\"\n\n\"They close at eleven. I didn't realize how quickly the time passed.\"\n\nHe reached for the check, but I was quicker. \"This is on me. After all, you're helping me with my research. This is the least I can do.\"\n\nHe smiled. \"I'm glad to help.\"\n\nI pulled out my credit card and our waitress immediately came to take care of the check. I'm sure she wasn't allowed to leave until we left and was probably anxious to see the back of us. She returned promptly and I left a generous tip to compensate for her time.\n\nOutside, Harley walked me to my car.\n\n\"I very much enjoyed talking to you. I'm not sure I answered all of your questions, though. Perhaps we should try again,\" he said with a sly smile.\n\nI laughed. \"Perhaps we should.\"\n\nHe took my hand, bowed low, and kissed it.\n\nMy knees started to buckle the tiniest bit as I got into the car. I was grateful he didn't try to kiss me. I'd enjoyed the evening, but kissing a man other than Leon was something I wasn't quite ready for yet. Although, as I drove home, I thought maybe there might be a time in the near future when I might be ready.\n\nOnce I got home, I was still very excited. Maybe there was room for a James Bond who looked like Sean Connery in 1938 England. I decided a little writing would help me settle down before I went to sleep.\n\nLady Elizabeth and Penelope stared at the butler in shock.\n\nJames hurried past the butler into the library and closed the doors behind him. \"Quickly, there's very little time. I've already called the police. Has anyone else come by here?\"\n\nBoth ladies shook their heads.\n\nHe turned to Thompkins. \"Make sure no one leaves this house.\"\n\nThe butler nodded, turned, and left.\n\n\"Oh, James. What are we going to do? Someone has to break the news to David. He's going to be devastated. Is she going to live?\"\n\nJames looked surprised. \"David?\"\n\n\"Yes, her husband, Edward the VIII,\" Lady Elizabeth said with a slight frown. \"I thought you knew all the family call him David.\"\n\n\"I know, but Wallis isn't the one who's been shot. It was her maid, Rebecca.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth and Penelope stared at each other. \"Thompkins just told us it was the duchess who'd been shot.\" She sighed. \"I know I shouldn't be relieved, but I must confess I am. I certainly didn't fancy having to explain to the king his sister-in-law was shot at my home.\"\n\nPenelope stared. \"I wonder how Thompkins got things so wrong.\"\n\n\"Easy to do. The maid was wearing the duchess's clothes. Apparently she didn't have appropriate clothing for shooting, so the duchess gave her some of her things. They were dressed almost exactly alike. It wasn't until we got a close look at the body that we discovered the mistake.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth gasped. \"Will the maid be alright?\"\n\nJames looked grim. \"I'm afraid not. She's dead.\"\n\nThe local constables arrived to secure the scene and wait for Scotland Yard. The shooting party returned in groups. Daphne and Lord Charles and Lady Abigail Chitterly came back together. Lord Charles seemed to be especially shaken up and required a stiff drink immediately upon arrival. Lady Abigail was remarkably well composed and sat quietly in the library.\n\nDaphne looked a little pale, but she walked straight to the sofa where Penelope and Lady Elizabeth were seated. When she reached her aunt, she whispered, \"The duchess was so distraught she fainted and had to be carried in by Count Rudolph.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth rose immediately and left the room.\n\nVictor, Virginia Hall, and the Polish ambassador, J\u00f3zef Lipski, were the next to arrive. They stood quietly near the window and whispered.\n\nLord William was the last to arrive as he had stayed to talk to the gamekeeper and the police, but quickly left.\n\nThe gathering in the library was grim. Lady Penelope looked to Victor. He caught her eye and smiled.\n\nDaphne took her aunt's place on the sofa next to her sister.\n\nPenelope took her sister's hand. \"Are you okay?\"\n\nDaphne nodded. \"I'm fine. I mean, it's not as though I knew her, but it's awful that it happened here, again.\"\n\nPenelope nodded. She shuddered at the recollection of stumbling across Charles Parker's body, six months ago. Parker had been brutally stabbed. \"Was it horrible?\"\n\n\"No. It wasn't like . . . like before. She was shot in the back.\"\n\nThe sisters sat quietly for several seconds before Penelope asked the unspoken question on everyone's minds. \"It was an accident, wasn't it?\"\n\nDaphne paused before responding. \"I don't know. But, I wonder . . .\"\n\n\"What?\"\n\n\"I wonder if it was an accident, what kind of accident it was.\"\n\nPenelope scowled. \"I don't understand.\"\n\n\"Was the accident that a woman was shot? Or was the accident that the wrong woman was shot?\"\n\n\"I see. James did tell us she was wearing Wallis's clothes. But surely it was merely an honest mistake. Accidents happen during shooting parties. It could have been a bad shot.\"\n\nDaphne stared at her sister. \"True. Accidents do happen, but if it was an accident, why is no one stepping forward? No one would blame them.\"\n\n\"Do you mean no one knows who shot her?\"\n\nDaphne nodded.\n\n\"But surely loaders or the beaters saw who . . .\"\n\nDaphne shook her head. \"No one claims to have seen anything.\"\n\nPenelope stared aghast. \"That's impossible. You were all paired off, right? Surely someone was with her.\"\n\n\"She was paired off with Wallis, Count Rudolph, and Brasseur. They claim she said she was cold and wet and was heading back to the house.\"\n\n\"But where was she found?\"\n\n\"In the marsh.\"\n\nPenelope stared openmouthed. \"But that's the total opposite direction from the house. It's not surprising she was shot if she was in the marsh. That's the direction everyone would be shooting. Why, that's suicide.\"\n\nDaphne nodded. \"They said she started walking toward the house. No one knows why she changed direction or why she went toward the shooting. It's awful.\"\n\nJames entered the library and stood for a few moments. He looked around, made eye contact with Daphne, and then strode purposely toward her. \"Where's your aunt?\"\n\nPenelope rose to leave but James motioned for her to stay.\n\n\"She's seeing to the duchess. She fainted.\"\n\nHe looked around impatiently. \"Look, I've got to run up to London.\"\n\n\"What about the police?\" Daphne asked.\n\n\"If I wait to talk to the police, it'll be hours before I can go. I'm not sure . . .\"\n\nDaphne stared at him for several seconds. \"If you go down the back stairs, you can get out by the servants' entrance.\"\n\n\"Cut through the back to our house, and Victor's car is in the garage. He keeps the keys in the visor,\" Penelope added. \"I know he won't mind.\"\n\nJames squeezed Penelope's hand in thanks and absentmindedly kissed Daphne's forehead before hurrying out.\n\nMoments later, Lord William entered the library with a constable.\n\nThe constable stood at the door to the library. \"We appreciate everyone's patience. However, I'm going to need to ask you all to bear with us a little longer. Someone from the Yard will be here shortly to take your statements. Thank you.\"\n\nA low murmur started as guests whispered to each other.\n\nLord William walked over to his nieces. \"Bloody bureaucratic falderal. Chap won't tell me what's happening in my own house.\"\n\nDaphne and Penelope smiled at their uncle.\n\nDaphne stood. \"Would you like a glass of port? I think you deserve it.\"\n\nLord William smiled fondly. \"I could use a bit of a drink. Thank you, dear.\"\n\nHe looked around. His favorite chair was occupied by Fordham-Baker, who was nodding off with a nearly empty bottle of his best scotch on the table nearby.\n\nDaphne returned and handed the glass to her uncle.\n\n\"Thank you.\" He gulped down the liquid.\n\nThompkins entered the room with a tea cart. He looked around briefly and then rolled the cart to Daphne and Penelope. \"Her ladyship thought everyone might like some tea and sandwiches.\"\n\nDaphne and Penelope poured tea and offered sandwiches. Lord Charles looked as though he couldn't stomach the idea of eating but accepted a glass of port in lieu of tea. Lady Abigail, however, said she was famished and ate enough sandwiches and scones for both she and her husband.\n\nThe other guests declined food but accepted the tea graciously.\n\nThe atmosphere was strained and Penelope was just about to see if her aunt needed help with the duchess when the door finally opened. The constable returned with a tall man, who was lean and gangly with thick curly hair.\n\n\"Good afternoon. My name is Detective Inspector Covington from Scotland Yard.\" He looked around the room. He hurried over to Lord William, smiled big, and shook his hand. \"Lord William, I came as soon as I heard.\"\n\n\"It's good to see you again, although, well, I don't mean with another murder, but . . . oh, dash it all, man. This is bad timing.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington nodded. \"Quite. Quite. Where's the Duchess of Windsor now?\"\n\n\"Upstairs in her room. Fainted when she heard about her maid.\"\n\n\"Can you take me to her?\" He followed Lord William upstairs.\n\nLady Elizabeth came out of the bedroom and saw Lord William and Detective Inspector Covington.\n\n\"Detective Inspector Covington, how nice to see you again.\"\n\n\"I wish it were under better circumstances.\" The detective suppressed a smile and looked around cautiously. \"How is she?\"\n\n\"She's had a shock. Dr. Haygood just arrived. I believe he's given her a sedative. She'll rest and I'm sure she'll be fine.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington's shoulders relaxed and he released a sigh. \"Well, that's certainly good news.\" He looked around again. \"We don't have much time. Someone from the Home Office is coming down to handle this case personally. Is there any chance the maid was the intended victim?\"\n\nLord William pondered the question and shrugged. \"I don't know.\"\n\nAnother constable hurried down the hall to the small group. \"Sir, take a look at this.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington unfolded the sheet of stationery and read. When he finished, his eyes were large and his hands had a slight tremor.\n\nBefore the detective could say anything, Thompkins walked in, in a quiet, yet determined manner. He stopped at the group and said to Lady Elizabeth, \"Telephone, your ladyship. It's the king.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington's eyes looked as though they would pop out of his head. \"Sweet mother of God.\"\n\nChapter 13\n\nIt is a truth universally acknowledged that anyone who owns a pet and thinks they will get to sleep later on the weekend than on weekdays must be delusional, especially if said pet is a twelve-year-old pampered poodle. For some reason, ever since daylight savings kicked in, Oreo now woke at three every morning to go outside. Despite the fact I'd only gone to bed about an hour earlier, I got up and opened his crate and made the trek downstairs. Snickers's bladder wasn't on the same schedule. She slept through this excursion.\n\nHe found his favorite spot near the fence line and did his business and then trotted back up the stairs and was snoring by the time I got back in bed.\n\nSleep evaded me. I tossed and turned and turned and tossed and finally gave up trying. I wasn't in a mood for more writing, so I pulled out a notebook and tried to make sense of all of the information we'd collected about Melody Hardwick.\n\nI rolled the conversation with Mariana over and over in my mind. She was definitely a passionate individual. She'd gotten in a physical fistfight with Melody, so I knew she was capable of violence. However, I just wasn't sure her violent streak extended to murder. Maybe if she felt her family was in jeopardy, she might murder, but I doubted she would plan a cold-blooded murder. Of course, I could be wrong. She might have been lying. Maybe the relationship between Trammel and Melody wasn't over. However, my gut told me she was telling the truth, but I wasn't willing to bet Dawson's future on it.\n\nVirgil Russell was a slimy lowlife. He was, according to Dawson, in an intimate relationship with the daughter of the man he'd murdered. That was weird. Although, based on what Ruby Mae said, he had been guilty of sexual extortion. His relationship with Melody could have been extortion rather than consensual.\n\nMelody's half sister was another strange cog in the wheel. Where did she come from? No one knew anything about her, and she seemed to have popped out of nowhere. Chicago was only ninety miles away from North Harbor. Their relationship didn't seem that close, based on the tone of her text messages with Emma. Although, it wasn't fair to read tone into a text message. Maybe she was just a curt texter. I would assess her veracity more after our meeting in a few hours.\n\nFinally, did A-squared really know who the murderer was? He wasn't a reliable source. What was the likelihood he was in the exact location when the murder was committed, unless . . . unless he actually murdered Melody? I pondered the question, but my mind kept rejecting it. As much as I disliked him, I couldn't see him actually murdering her. Well, maybe I could. If he thought she would prevent him from reaping benefits from Dawson's professional football career, he certainly would kill her. But, would he let Dawson take the blame for it? Getting convicted of murder would prevent Dawson from making millions in the NFL. A-squared wasn't someone who thought things through to the end. His comment yesterday that Dawson was in good hands might imply he didn't worry about Dawson because he knew we would work to clear him. Surely he couldn't be that cold-blooded. Maybe if Dawson spoke to him? I wasn't sure Dawson and his father were on speaking terms, but he might know if his father was telling the truth or not. When Dawson was telling us about seeing Virgil with Melody, I got the feeling he was holding something back. What if he saw someone else there too, his father? I made a note to ask him.\n\nI reread my notes but none of it made any more sense at four than it had at three. I turned out my light and settled down. I lay perfectly still and took deep, relaxing breaths and meditated on the suspects in the hope a clear plan of action would reveal itself. Unfortunately, my mind refused to cooperate and kept intertwining Melody with my British cozy. I kept seeing Melody wearing a French maid's uniform while a tweed-clad Professor Harley Quin smoked a pipe near the fireplace and cleaned his shotgun. A sleazy character in polyester with lots of gold chains stood ominously over Melody's body while A-squared, who surprisingly still had on greasy blue jeans and a T-shirt, drank scotch and laughed.\n\nI awoke two hours later to the doorbell. It was barely six and I calculated I had gotten about three hours of sleep total. I looked around my room and Oreo and Snickers were still asleep.\n\n\"Some watch poodles you two turned out to be.\" I pulled on the jeans I'd worn the night before and grabbed a T-shirt from the hamper and slid it over my head.\n\nI hurried to the kitchen and looked over the rail and saw two uniformed police officers standing at my door. I was instantly awake. My heart raced and I hurried downstairs and opened the door.\n\n\"What's wrong?\"\n\n\"Does Dawson Alexander live here?\" one of the policemen asked.\n\nI tried to take deep breaths to slow down my heart. \"Yes,\" I whispered.\n\n\"May we speak to him?\" the same policemen asked.\n\nI closed my eyes and nodded. \"Follow me.\"\n\nI led them inside the garage. They seemed a bit hesitant about entering and looked around tentatively. I turned on the light and hurried to the door. I knocked loudly.\n\nIt took several minutes of me knocking to wake Dawson, who came downstairs wearing a MISU T-shirt, sweat pants, and flip-flops. He had bed hair and yawned when he opened the door.\n\nA look of terror crossed his face at the sight of me with two police officers. The blood drained from his face. His eyes had the startled \"deer in the headlights\" look that reflected the internal anguish he was feeling. He must have thought they were there to arrest him, again.\n\n\"Dawson Alexander?\" the officer asked.\n\nHe nodded.\n\n\"Your dad was involved in a car accident and was seriously injured. He's been flown to River Bend Memorial Hospital by Life Force.\"\n\nI didn't think he could get much paler, but he did.\n\nHe gulped. \"Is he gonna be okay?\"\n\n\"Unfortunately, all we know is his injuries are severe. You'll have to talk to the doctors.\"\n\nThe other officer had been quiet up until this point. \"Do you have someone who can take you to the hospital?\"\n\nI stepped forward. \"I can take him.\"\n\nThe officers looked at me and then back at Dawson, who nodded his acceptance.\n\nThey turned to leave, but before they got out the door, one of the officers turned back and said, \"I watched you play ball a couple of weeks ago. You're really good. I hope you get beyond all this.\"\n\nWe got in the car. I made the forty-mile drive in less than thirty minutes and dropped Dawson at the emergency room door. It wasn't until I pulled into the parking garage that I realized I'd left my purse and money at home.\n\nThankfully, I'd grabbed my cell phone and I called Jenna and asked her to swing by the house and grab my purse.\n\nTwo hours later, Jenna and Nana Jo walked down the hallway with my purse and a carrier from a nearby fast-food restaurant with four large beverages and a bag filled with greasy sausage biscuits. My mouth watered and my stomach growled at the sight of the coffee. Both Jenna and Nana Jo stared at me, but neither said a word as I snatched the coffee from the carrier and took a swig.\n\nJenna sat next to me. \"How is he?\" Jenna whispered as she glanced at Dawson, who was pacing up and down the hallway.\n\nI shrugged. \"Not good. A-squared's in intensive care. They let Dawson in for about ten minutes earlier but then alarms started going off and they kicked him out of the room. An army of doctors and nurses rushed in the room. A doctor eventually came out and said he'd gone into cardiac arrest. He's still alive, but . . . I don't think the outlook is good.\"\n\nNana Jo tsked. \"That poor kid. He's been through a lifetime of misery in a short period of time.\"\n\n\"We let the dogs out before we left, and Chris and Zaq said they'd take care of things at the store.\" Jenna sipped her hot tea.\n\nI was blessed to have my family. They were annoying and would result in my need for therapy, but they were here for me. I looked at Dawson and tried to guess how he must be feeling.\n\nJenna stared at Dawson and leaned close to me and whispered, \"I talked to Stinky Pitt this morning.\"\n\nI watched to make sure Dawson wasn't in listening distance. \"Did he say how it happened?\"\n\n\"Apparently A-Squared made two telephone calls. One was to Virgil Russell, who came and posted bail. They don't know who the other call was to.\"\n\n\"Virgil?\"\n\nShe nodded. \"A few hours later, they got a call someone was laying on the railroad tracks by Eden Springs trailer park.\"\n\n\"The railroad tracks?\" I shivered.\n\n\"Some kids were walking around out there and thought it was a heap of clothes on the rails. He'd been hit by a car and moved to the tracks.\"\n\n\"Oh my. Do the police have any ideas? Did they question Virgil Russell?\"\n\nShe paused as Dawson walked by before continuing. \"He claimed he dropped him at a liquor store near the HOD. A-squared said he needed to use the phone. He says that's the last time he saw him, but the police are getting a warrant for his car. They'll go over it with a fine-tooth comb.\"\n\nJenna turned to stare at me and then took several sniffs. \"Did you shower today?\"\n\n\"No. I didn't have time. Why?\"\n\n\"You stink.\"\n\nI lifted my armpit and took a whiff.\n\n\"Plus, your hair is sticking straight up in the back.\" She pulled a compact out of her purse and handed it to me.\n\nShe was right. My hair was sticking straight up in the back as though held up by electric current. I had crusts at the corners of my eyes and a dried trail of drool from one corner of my mouth. \"I can't believe no one said anything to me.\" I finger combed my hair into submission.\n\nMemorial Hospital was the biggest hospital in the area. It was a huge facility that had been added onto many times over the years and was now a winding maze with lots of twists and turns. Thankfully, someone thought to color code the building. The multi-striped legend was painted on the walls. I followed the blue stripe down hallways to the elevator and down to the gift shop. It always felt like a major accomplishment whenever I visited someone here and managed to make it out without stopping to ask for directions, and today was no exception.\n\nThe hospital gift shop had been renovated since the last time I was here. Instead of being a small closet containing flowers, get well cards, and overpriced snacks, it was now a shop that would give any downtown boutique a run for its money. I browsed the aisles until I found the toiletries. I bought a kit that included toothbrush, toothpaste, comb and brush, soap, deodorant, mouthwash, and shaving kit. I also bought underwear and a T-shirt. Since I was there, I also ordered flowers for A-squared.\n\nAt the intensive care nurses' station, I asked if there was a place where I could clean up. They provided me a washcloth and towel and took me down a back hall to the nurses' fitness area. There were showers and I cleaned up.\n\nWhen I returned, I felt better. Amazing what clean underwear and toothpaste could do. It was getting close to noon and Jenna said she needed to get home.\n\n\"You don't have to stay here with me. I'll be okay,\" Dawson said.\n\n\"I know I don't, but I want to stay.\"\n\nDawson paused. \"There's nothing you can do. I know you have things you need to do.\" He looked down.\n\n\"Is there something you need me to do?\"\n\n\"Yeah. I need you to find out who killed Melody and . . . who tried to kill my dad.\"\nChapter 14\n\n\"The girls hated missing out on our trip to Chicago, so I told them to take the South Shore and we'd meet them at the outlet mall later.\" Nana Jo looked sheepish. \"I also told them we'd swing by The Boat.\"\n\nThe South Shore commuter train ran between River Bend, Indiana, and Chicago. For less than ten dollars, the South Shore transported people from the airport in River Bend to downtown Chicago, without the stress of traffic or parking. I knew people who made the two-hour-and-twenty-minute trip daily for work. I'd taken the South Shore downtown to go to Cubs games, museums, or shopping. The train didn't go through Michigan, but North Harbor residents drove thirty minutes to Michigan City, Indiana, to get on the train.\n\nMichigan City was a small town on the Lake Michigan shoreline with nice beaches. It had a designer outlet mall, and The Boat. For most of my life, land-based gambling was illegal in the state of Indiana. Eventually, some creative developer came up with a work-around by turning a boat into a casino. When The Boat first opened, it cruised up and down Lake Michigan. Guests entered every two hours. Eventually, law-makers abandoned the requirement for the boat to move and people boarded or disembarked at will. A trip to The Boat meant I might not get home until the wee hours of the morning. Given that I'd only had a few hours of sleep, I wasn't happy.\n\nI followed the directions Cassidy Logan had sent to the West Inglenook area of Chicago. North Harbor was an economically depressed area with abandoned buildings, high unemployment, and crime. West Inglenook, at fifteen miles wide with three times the North Harbor population, took economic depression to another level. Most buildings were boarded up and covered with gang graffiti. The few shops still open had uninviting iron bars covering every piece of glass and brick walls which reminded me of a prison.\n\nI pulled up in front of an old brownstone with crumbling bricks, broken glass, and a tired-looking floral sofa from the seventies with no legs and sagging cushions in the yard. In the alley next to the house, a group of men were shooting craps. A couple of teenage boys with jeans down to their knees and bandanas tied around their heads hung on the porch.\n\nI turned to Nana Jo. \"Do you think my car is going to be safe here?\"\n\nShe looked at me like she'd never seen me before and then patted my knee. \"Honey, you can't be serious? This car is twelve years old and has close to two hundred thousand miles on it. The turn signal is attached to the steering column with duct tape and if you hit a bump, the lights turn off and on. The only thing of value is the radio, and it doesn't have any knobs.\"\n\n\"I have all of the knobs.\" I opened the ashtray and showed all of the knobs for the radio and air-conditioning, along with a pair of pliers I used to change channels. \"Besides, you'll hurt her feelings.\"\n\nNana Jo rolled her eyes. \"If I were you, I'd pay those guys fifty dollars to dispose of the car so the police don't find it.\"\n\n\"Don't listen to her, Martha.\" I patted the dashboard.\n\nWe got out of the car. I opened the hatch and picked up Melody's meager belongings. We walked toward the building. One of the young kids who looked to be about thirteen stared at me as though I were a piece of meat and then made a rude remark to his friend in Spanish. I always found it amusing when people thought you couldn't understand their language. When I responded in Spanish, the smirk immediately left his face. All outward signs indicated I should be afraid of this hooligan, but something in my gut told me not to be afraid. Years teaching in the public school system provided what I called a sixth sense. It had never failed me, so I trusted my gut.\n\n\"Would you keep an eye on my car?\" I asked.\n\nHe looked at my Honda CRV and laughed. \"That piece of junk? Lady, you'd have to pay somebody to take that piece of crap.\"\n\nTwo insults in less than five minutes was too much. I lifted my head and marched around him. Nana Jo came up behind me. Just as she climbed the porch, the kid came up on Nana Jo in a threatening manner. \"But you can give me your purse, old lady.\" He reached out his hand as if he thought she would just hand it over.\n\nI don't know if it was the idea of a thirteen-year-old boy trying to take her purse or the fact he called her \"old lady.\" Nana Jo spread her legs, crouched low in her aikido stance, and dipped her shoulder. She reached out, grabbed his outstretched hand with both of hers, twisted, and dropped to her knee in one motion. The kid was flipped onto his back and Nana Jo put her knee in his chest and held his arm in the air.\n\nHe yelled obscenities while he lay on the ground.\n\nHis friend stood openmouthed.\n\nAfter a few seconds, Nana Jo released the kid's arm and stood. \"Better watch who you're calling an 'old lady,'\" she said as she marched up the stairs.\n\nThere was no front door, so we walked into the building and headed up the stairs.\n\nWe walked up three flights of stairs in silence. When we got to the top floor, Nana Jo stepped aside for me to knock.\n\nI looked at her. \"You okay?\"\n\n\"Yep. That was just a basic throw down.\"\n\n\"Okay, Bruce Lee. Maybe you shouldn't antagonize the locals.\"\n\nShe smiled. \"Then the locals better stop provoking me.\"\n\nI knocked on the door.\n\n\"Come in.\"\n\nWe opened the door and walked inside.\n\nThe apartment was small and cramped, with oversized leather furniture that looked as though it had seen better days. One wall was dominated by the largest television I'd ever seen. It was massive and similar to the one I'd seen at Trammel Braxton's home with cords hanging down to video games. There was a playpen in the middle of the room with two toddlers inside wearing nothing but diapers. Sitting in a chair, smoking a cigarette, was a small woman. She was a petite Caucasian, fair-skinned, with thin red hair and green eyes. She was also about six months pregnant.\n\n\"You must be from that school?\"\n\n\"Well, actually, I'm just a friend of Emma's, your sister's roommate.\"\n\n\"Half sister.\" She took a long drag from her cigarette. \"You can drop the stuff anywhere.\"\n\nIf I didn't talk fast, we'd be out of here in less than two seconds. \"Sure, but let me introduce myself. My name is Samantha Washington and this is my grandmother, Mrs. Josephine Thomas.\"\n\nNana Jo frowned. \"You know smoking when you're pregnant can lead to birth defects.\"\n\nShe stared at Nana Jo and exhaled slowly. \"Thanks for the public service announcement.\"\n\nThis wasn't going well. \"May we sit for a few moments? Those stairs were a killer.\" I didn't wait for a response and plopped down on the sofa.\n\nUsing two fingers, Nana Jo removed some clothing and sat.\n\n\"Whew. Thank you so much.\" I tried to think of a way to ask my questions before she threw us out.\n\nNana Jo walked to the playpen. One of the kids was asleep. The other, a curly-haired boy, looked at her and immediately held up both arms to be picked up.\n\nNana Jo looked at Cassidy. \"Do you mind if I hold him?\"\n\nCassidy shrugged.\n\nNana Jo reached down and picked up the baby, who immediately threw back his head and laughed and reached for her earrings. Nana Jo had a way with babies, and she returned to her seat. The baby stood straight up. Nana Jo sang \"Row, Row, Row Your Boat.\" With each \"row,\" she rocked the youngster forward and back. He laughed hilariously each time he went backward.\n\nI watched them for several moments. \"Cassidy, when's the last time you saw your sister . . . ah, half sister?\"\n\nShe smoked silently for so long I thought she wasn't going to answer. \"It's been years. We weren't close.\"\n\n\"You both have the same father?\"\n\n\"Mother.\"\n\nNana Jo stopped singing long enough to ask, \"Did you know what your sister was involved in?\"\n\nCassidy smiled. \"She was always up to something.\" She finished her cigarette and put the butt out. \"That's how she ended up in that program. Go to jail or go to college.\" She laughed. \"Mel thought that was hilarious. She had access to an entirely new pool of marks.\"\n\n\"Did you know what scam she was running?\" I asked.\n\nCassidy looked at me suspiciously. \"You've got a lot of questions.\"\n\n\"We want to find out who killed her. We thought you might be able to help us.\"\n\n\"Why would I want to do that?\"\n\n\"Because she was your sister,\" I said\n\nShe shrugged. \"Everybody's gotta die of something.\"\n\n\"Maybe because, in spite of your attitude, you're basically a good person and want to do the right thing,\" Nana Jo said.\n\nI stared at my grandmother, who seemed determined to get us thrown out before we got information, and then turned and looked at Cassidy.\n\nCassidy was staring at Nana Jo but didn't say anything. Eventually, she wiped a tear from her eye. \"Look. I haven't seen Mel in years. She sent text messages sometimes. The last one was a month ago.\"\n\n\"Do you still have it?\" I asked.\n\nShe shook her head. \"Nawh. She was running a scam. Said if things worked out, she'd be set for life.\" She looked at her sleeping baby and the one on Nana Jo's lap. Then she looked at her stomach. \"Said she would get us out of this place.\" She wiped away an errant tear and got another cigarette out of the pack on the table and lit up. \"She talked a lot of crap.\"\n\n\"Did she mention anyone that wanted to hurt her?\" I asked.\n\nCassidy took a long drag of her cigarette and then she sat up. \"She didn't mention any names. But she said someone was trying to muscle in on her, but she had his number.\"\n\nWe asked a few other questions, but Cassidy didn't have any more answers. The sleeping baby woke up and started screaming. She hoisted herself out of her seat and picked him up. He looked exactly like the boy Nana Jo was bouncing on her lap.\n\n\"Twins?\" I asked.\n\nShe nodded.\n\nShe had her hands full, and it didn't seem as though we'd learn anything more. So, we rose to leave. Nana Jo handed over the baby.\n\nBefore we left, Nana Jo turned and asked, \"Did you know Virgil Russell?\"\n\nCassidy was jiggling a baby on each hip. \"Yeah. I know him. Why?\"\n\n\"It seemed strange to us that Melody was . . . involved with him,\" I said.\n\n\"Mel was always pretty close to Virgil. He taught her practically everything she knew about conning people. Virgil taught her how to dress and talk and act so she got richer marks.\"\n\n\"But he killed your father?\" Nana Jo said.\n\nCassidy shrugged. \"Her father, not mine. Besides, that wasn't a big loss. He was a drunk who beat all of us every chance he got. That's how he died. He beat Mel so bad we thought he'd kill her. Virgil tried to stop him. He pushed him. He hit his head on the end of the table.\" She lowered the toddlers back into the playpen. \"He and Mel got closer after that.\"\n\n\"Any chance he was the man trying to muscle onto her scam?\" I asked.\n\nCassidy shook her head. \"I doubt it. They worked together.\"\n\nWe left Cassidy and walked down the narrow stairway. Once outside, we saw the youngster Nana Jo had tossed earlier. He stood in the middle of the sidewalk in a threatening manner.\n\n\"Maybe I should call the police,\" I whispered to Nana Jo.\n\n\"No need.\" She stepped forward. \"You want a piece of me?\" she asked the kid.\n\nThe boy snarled. \"I've got something for you this time, old lady.\" He reached into his pocket and pulled out a switchblade, which he held up with his right hand.\n\nNana Jo smiled and reached into her purse and pulled out her gun and pointed it. She squinted, closed one eye, and fired. The bullet hit the blade of the knife and ricocheted off.\n\nThe startled hooligan dropped the knife, turned, and ran.\n\nThere was a loud burst of laughter from the gamblers in the alley. Five young men in jeans with tattoos and piercings whistled and laughed. One of the men walked forward. \"Hey, I've got two hundred dollars that says you can't hit that billboard?\" He held up several bills and grinned. Each of the other men also held up money.\n\nNana Jo looked at the billboard that stood above the building across the street and within an arm's distance of the elevated train track.\n\n\"Oh, no,\" I pleaded with my grandmother.\n\nThe grin on her face and the gleam in her eyes told me I was wasting my time.\n\nNana Jo extended her arm and pointed her gun at the billboard. She cocked her head to the side and pulled the trigger.\n\nWe all looked at the billboard. There was a large picture of a popular insurance company's spokesperson wearing a white apron with her black hair pulled back with a headband. The woman had a large smile on her face and a perfectly round hole in the center of her forehead.\n\nThe men hooped and laughed. One of them even bowed to Nana Jo as they all came and handed her their money.\nChapter 15\n\nI hustled my grandmother into my intact vehicle and hurried away.\n\nNana Jo laughed as she fanned herself with her money. \"Easiest thousand dollars I've ever made.\"\n\n\"You could have gotten in trouble. What if you'd missed?\"\n\nShe looked at me. \"I was Lauderdale County's sharpshooter three years in a row. Besides, that billboard was huge. You'd have to be blind to miss it.\"\n\nI gave up trying to shame my grandmother into reform and headed east. We drove in relative silence the forty minutes to the outlet mall in Michigan City. I found a parking space near one of the larger anchor stores.\n\nBefore I got out, Nana Jo took half of her winnings and handed it to me. \"Happy Birthday, Sam.\"\n\nI looked at the wad of cash with my mouth open. \"I can't take that.\"\n\n\"Why not?\"\n\n\"It's too much. Besides, you won the money fair and square. You should spend it on yourself.\"\n\n\"I intend to splurge and enjoy myself. However, I wouldn't have had the opportunity to win the money if it wasn't for you. Besides, I want you to get yourself some nice clothes. You never know when you might get another date or non-date.\"\n\n\"But really, I don't need\u2014\"\n\nShe waved her hand. \"Sam, will you please just take the money and say thank you?\"\n\nI reached over and gave my grandmother a big hug. \"Thank you.\"\n\nThe title outlet mall implied incredibly low prices, but discounted prices could be a relative term. Lighthouse Place Mall was a designer outlet mall. While the prices were discounted from what you paid in a regular mall, they were still higher than discount retail stores. In the past, I'd limited myself to three or four stores known for ridiculously low prices where I bought blue jeans for less than five dollars. Today I walked into the stores with the designers' names on the front. I bought several really good pairs of jeans, silk blouses, and even a few dresses.\n\nNana Jo bought new tennis shoes and workout attire and then splurged on a lovely dress with a plunging neckline. Laden down with shopping bags, we made our way to the car several hours later. The girls' train was due to arrive in a few minutes. I needed to pick them up from the train station. There was a trolley that took visitors from the train station to the outlet mall, but the girls preferred spending their money at The Boat.\n\nThey were waiting at the depot when I arrived. No need to park, I pulled up to the platform and loaded them in. I then headed for The Boat.\n\nI let everyone out at the front of the casino and parked. By the time I got to the lobby, I was tired. Lack of sleep and tons of walking at the outlet mall hit me at the same time. We'd agreed to eat first, so I went to the buffet and looked around until I found them.\n\nNormally we went to the Four Feathers Casino, which was closer to North Harbor. Trips to The Boat were rare, which meant the girls hadn't racked up enough perks for free food. One thing remained constant, regardless of where we went. Ruby Mae always ran into someone she knew. Today was no exception. When I sat down at the restaurant, she was being hugged by one of the chefs, and a waitress was nearby, awaiting her turn. The chef turned out to be a godson and the waitress was a great-niece. Ruby Mae's connections resulted in free dinner vouchers and dessert take-out boxes, which were usually prohibited at buffets. When we finished, I took the boxes to the car. By the time I walked back to the lobby, I had moved beyond tired to exhausted. We agreed to meet in two hours, so I found a comfy wingback chair in a quiet, cozy corner and took a nap. I set the alarm on my phone to wake me after an hour and a half. When I awoke and felt my face, the pattern of the chair's fabric was imprinted on the side of my face and there was a large wet stain on the chair's wing from drool. I was amazed how refreshed and energized I felt after my power nap.\n\nI walked around the casino and grabbed a coffee from a beverage station. I still had fifteen minutes before our meeting, so I put twenty dollars into a machine with a picture of Tarzan on the front. I only played penny slots and I was normally very conservative, but I tossed caution to the wind and bet the maximum, a dollar fifty. After only two spins, I went into a bonus. I was relatively new to slot machines, so I didn't know exactly what had happened, but the next thing I knew, Tarzan yodeled and swung across my screen. There was a lot going on. Wheels spun, Tarzan pounded gorillas, and drums beat. After the third spin, lights flashed, bells rang, my chair vibrated, and my screen was almost completely full of wilds. Coins started flying on the screen and the lady next to me started screaming and hitting me in the arm. A crowd of people gathered around my machine.\n\nTwo of the casino staff made their way through the crowd to my machine. One of them inserted a card into the machine, which stopped the flashing lights. The other one smiled and pulled out a clipboard. \"Congratulations. Can I see your driver's license, please?\"\n\nI was dazed and couldn't grasp what had happened. \"What just happened?\"\n\nHe smiled. \"You just won a lot of money.\" He took the driver's license I handed him and began copying information.\n\n\"How much did I win?\"\n\nHe looked up at the machine. \"You just won fifty-four thousand dollars.\"\n\nI nearly passed out. \"No way!\"\n\nThe casino worker smiled. \"Yes. Way!\"\n\nI stared at him with my mouth open. \"I think I need to go someplace so I can throw up.\"\n\nHe looked startled but helped me rise. I started to walk away but then turned back to the machine.\n\nThe other casino worker took me by the arm. \"It's okay. I'll take care of everything.\" He looked back at his coworker. \"I'll take her to the office.\"\n\nI followed the casino worker until we came to a small door behind a cash machine that I wouldn't even have noticed. He opened the door and we went inside. There was a desk, two guest chairs, and a small love seat. I sat and put my head between my legs.\n\n\"Can I get you some water?\"\n\nI nodded.\n\nHe left and came back with a bottle of water.\n\nI tried to open the lid, but my hands were shaking so badly I had to get the casino worker to open it for me. He untwisted the lid and gave me the bottle, and I took a long sip. My phone vibrated. Nana Jo and the girls must be wondering where I was. I couldn't get my phone out of my pants pocket fast enough. When I tried to dial, my hands shook so badly I kept missing her name. I turned to the casino worker. \"My grandmother and three other ladies are in the lobby waiting for me. Can you please get them? I have no idea how to get to them from here.\"\n\nHe said he'd be happy to go. I took deep breaths and tried to process the fact I had just won fifty-four thousand dollars. Every time I thought about the dollar amount, I felt light-headed and had to put my head back between my knees until the dizziness passed.\n\nSeveral minutes later Nana Jo and the girls came into the room.\n\n\"What happened? Are you okay?\" Nana Jo asked.\n\n\"Didn't he tell you?\" I pointed at the casino worker.\n\n\"He didn't tell us anything. He just said you weren't feeling well.\"\n\nThe room was small and with six people, it was claustrophobic. I looked at the casino worker.\n\nHe struggled to hide a smile. \"I thought you might prefer to tell them yourself.\"\n\nNana Jo's brow was wrinkled and a vein was pulsing on the side of her head. She was getting angry. \"Tell us what?\"\n\nI pointed at the casino worker. \"He said I won fifty-four thousand dollars.\"\n\nThere was dead silence for several seconds and then Nana Jo sank down onto a chair. \"Sweet mother of God.\"\n\nIrma's response was not holy and resulted in a sharp reprimand from the others before she burst into a coughing fit.\n\nDorothy and Ruby Mae congratulated me.\n\nThe worker slid out of the room and returned with more waters, which he passed around. Nana Jo sat next to me. Irma and Ruby Mae were in the guest chairs, and Dorothy propped on the desk.\n\n\"Son, can you prop that door open a bit.\" Nana Jo fanned herself. \"Either I'm having a hot flash or I'm going to pass out.\"\n\nHe propped the door open.\n\nThe casino worker who took my driver's license entered with a security guard. We were now packed like sardines in that room. He returned my driver's license and handed me some forms to fill out. \"These are for the IRS. Do you want us to subtract taxes or do you want to pay them yourself?\"\n\nI filled in the paperwork. \"Please subtract the taxes.\"\n\nWhen I was done, I handed the papers back.\n\n\"How do you want the money?\"\n\n\"Excuse me?\"\n\nThe casino worker smiled. \"Do you want a check? Cash? Or a combination of both?\"\n\nNana Jo whistled. \"Cash? You mean people actually want cash?\"\n\nThe woman nodded. \"You'd be surprised.\"\n\nI looked at the sheet she handed me, which indicated after taxes I would get over forty thousand dollars. \"Can I get five checks?\"\n\nShe smiled. \"You can have anything you want.\"\n\n\"I need five checks. One made out to each of us.\" I pointed around the room.\n\nThe girls began to protest. \"Oh, no. This is too much\u2014\"\n\nI held up my hand. \"We have a system. We always split the winnings. This is no different.\"\n\nWe argued for several moments, but ultimately I overruled them and made the arrangements with the casino. We would each get about eight thousand dollars. It took close to an hour for the casino to get all of the arrangements made.\n\nIrma asked for a whiskey. Our friendly casino worker took orders and brought drinks.\n\nNana Jo asked if someone could find our car and bring it to the door for us.\n\nI handed over my keys, along with directions on where I'd parked. By the time we were all settled out, the car was waiting at the front.\n\nI was still dazed but ecstatic to share this windfall with my grandmother and her friends.\n\nThe ride home was spent talking about how we'd each spend our money. Irma wanted plastic surgery to lift everything that had sagged over the years. Dorothy suggested she do something about her chronic coughing instead, but that suggestion fell on deaf ears.\n\nDorothy wanted to go on a cruise. Ruby Mae's church was going on a trip to the Holy Land and she wanted to go. Now she could. Nana Jo was very vague and refused to say what she planned to do.\n\nI didn't have plans for spending my share, but the girls were very vocal on how they thought I should spend it. The unanimous decision was I should use my share to buy a new car. I knew Nana Jo's views on my CRV, but the girls had never complained.\n\n\"Beggars can't be choosy,\" Irma said.\n\n\"Those newer cars have Wi-Fi and I would love to use my iPad or watch a movie,\" Dorothy said.\n\n\"My daughter has a Lexus and the ride is so smooth. You can barely tell the motor is running,\" Ruby Mae yelled from the back seat.\n\n\"'Et tu, Brute?'\" I looked at her in the rearview mirror.\n\nRuby Mae laughed. \"One thing I can say for this car is that my prayer life has improved since I've been riding in it.\"\n\nI stuck out my tongue.\n\nThey all laughed. I knew the joking was all in good fun. The girls weren't complainers. My CRV was old and loud and there were a number of aesthetic problems. But the engine was solid and the car was reliable. It had four-wheel drive and performed wonderfully in the snow.\n\nI dropped the girls at the retirement village and they asked me to get out of the car, which was unusual.\n\nI got out and each one of them hugged and thanked me. They had tears in their eyes, which made me cry too.\n\nI got back in the car and Nana Jo and I drove back to the store. When I pulled into the garage, Nana Jo stopped me.\n\n\"I want to thank you too, Sam. That was a very nice thing you did. You didn't have to. No one would have blamed you. That is a lot of money.\"\n\n\"I know, but I wanted to.\"\n\nShe nodded. \"I know you really love this car. It's served you well for more than a decade. However, I do think you should consider an upgrade. Not because the CRV is unreliable, but because you've been through so much over the years and I think it would be nice to treat yourself.\"\n\nI started to protest, but she held up her hand. \"You don't have to defend your decision. I just wanted to explain why you should do this. It's okay to have nice things, and it's not frivolous to spend money on yourself. You're a hard worker and you deserve nice clothes and a nice car. You're always thinking about others, and I want you to know it's okay to think about yourself too.\" She patted my hand and got out of the car.\n\nI sat in the car for several minutes and let the tears stream down my face. Leon and I had worked hard our whole lives, and we never had eight thousand dollars at one time. That was more money than we put down on our house. I was accustomed to scrimping and saving and making every dollar stretch as far as it could go. I wasn't good at spending money on things that weren't essential. I drove cars until they were basically no longer drivable. I looked at Martha and patted the dashboard. \"You've served me well, old friend, but maybe it's time for a change.\"\n\nI had been on an emotional roller coaster and felt tired. I finally got out of the car and went upstairs. Dawson had sent several text messages throughout the day. His dad was still in intensive care, but he was stable. The doctors had put him in a medically induced coma to decrease brain swelling. The twins had packed a bag for Dawson and took it to him at the hospital. They also had taken Oreo and Snickers home with them, which meant the house was quiet.\n\nOne pleasant surprise was a large vase of flowers on my kitchen counter. The card indicated they were from Professor Quin. I was glad Nana Jo was in her room because I couldn't stop smiling. The worst thing about trips to the casino was the smell of smoke that clung to your clothes and hair. I took a long hot shower and got ready for bed. Not surprisingly, I was too excited to sleep. Instead, I spent a couple hours looking at cars online. Eventually I decided writing therapy would be useful.\n\n\"Blasted doctor.\" Lord William beat his fist on the bed but winced as his leg teetered and nearly fell of the pillow where he had it propped.\n\nLady Elizabeth sat in a straight back chair near her husband's side. \"Now, dear, you know it isn't Doctor Haygood's fault your gout flared up. You have nobody to blame but yourself.\"\n\n\"You'd think he could do more than say, 'keep your leg elevated and watch your diet.' My God, it's the twentieth century. Medicine should have a cure for this by now. I'm surprised he didn't pull out leeches. It's archaic.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled. She was familiar with her husband's rants and knew he was in a great amount of pain.\n\nPenelope paced. \"When the king called, did he say how he expected us to keep this out of the newspapers?\"\n\nDaphne looked up from her seat at the window. \"Especially with the editor of the London Times here in the house.\"\n\nVictor leaned against a large armoire. \"I doubt if Fordham-Baker even knows what day of the week it is. The man's been plastered all day.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth looked at Victor and then mumbled, \"I wonder . . .\"\n\n\"Maybe we can keep him that way,\" Penelope said.\n\nLady Elizabeth looked at her niece. \"That might not be a bad idea.\" She took a deep breath. \"The king wants us to solve this murder, like we did with Charles Parker's.\"\n\nPenelope stopped pacing and turned to stare at her aunt. \"But that was different. We were trying to save a friend.\"\n\nElizabeth sighed. \"Now we're trying to save a member of our family.\"\n\nPenelope looked sheepish. \"You're right. Whether we like it or not, Wallis is married to our cousin. She's family.\"\n\nDaphne sighed. \"Alright then, where do we begin? Remember, I wasn't involved in your other investigation.\"\n\n\"That's right. I'd forgotten.\" Lady Elizabeth frowned. \"Well, I think we divide and conquer. First, let's go through what we know and then we can come up with our plan of attack.\"\n\nLord William saluted his wife. \"Aye, captain.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled.\n\nPenelope paced. \"We know she was shot in the marsh, but we don't know what she was doing there.\"\n\n\"Yes we do.\" Lord William sat up straight. \"In all the excitement and pain\"\u2014he patted his leg\u2014\"I nearly forgot. When I was talking to Detective Inspector Covington, one of the constables brought him a note.\" Lord William's lips twitched as he struggled to hold back a smile. \"I managed to get a look at the note when he was distracted.\"\n\n\"Well done,\" Lady Elizabeth said with pride and saluted her husband.\n\nHe beamed. \"The note was from Lord Charles, asking her to meet him in the trees by the marsh.\"\n\n\"That's very odd. I wonder why he chose that location,\" Lady Elizabeth mused.\n\n\"I think Detective Inspector Covington was going to find out,\" Lord William continued. \"He was heading to talk to Charles but got distracted by the call from the king and then the call from the chief inspector.\"\n\n\"Now that was odd,\" Penelope said. \"Why do you suppose he was called back to London?\"\n\nLady Elizabeth reflected, \"I suspect Bertie might have applied a little royal pressure. I think he's asked the Yard to back off for a few days to buy us time to figure this thing out.\"\n\nPenelope stared. \"And they listened?\"\n\n\"The king carries a lot of weight. There used to be a time when the aristocracy ruled supreme.\" Lord William shook his head. \"Those days are gone now.\"\n\n\"And rightly so,\" Lady Elizabeth said. \"Justice shouldn't be reserved for the nobility.\"\n\n\"So, we need to find out from Lord Charles why he wanted to meet with Rebecca,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\nDaphne smiled. \"I can tell you why he wanted to meet with her. It's because he's a dirty old man and was most likely having a fling with her, right under his wife's nose.\"\n\nEveryone stared.\n\n\"I think Lady Abigail was well aware of what Lord Charles was up to,\" Penelope added. \"I sat next to her the other night, and she may look like a mouse, but I could tell she was bothered.\"\n\n\"Bothered enough to kill?\" Victor asked.\n\nPenelope shrugged. \"I don't know.\"\n\n\"If she was, she certainly had the skill to do it,\" Daphne said. \"I heard her say she was a crack shot in America. Apparently she won an Annie Oakley shooting trophy in the States when she was a young girl.\"\n\n\"Very interesting.\" Lady Elizabeth turned to her husband. \"Do you feel up to doing a little investigating?\"\n\nLord William nodded. \"I can't go tramping around the grounds, but I can talk, and Charles and I are friendly enough.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth nodded. \"Wonderful. You talk to Lord Charles and see what you can find out.\" She turned to Daphne. \"Daphne, I'd like you to figure out who had the opportunity to shoot her. Where was everyone at the time of the shooting?\"\n\nDaphne frowned. \"You want to know who was unaccounted for?\"\n\nLady Elizabeth nodded. \"Yes. That's it exactly. Do you think you can do that?\"\n\nShe nodded.\n\n\"What would you like us to do?\" Penelope asked.\n\nLady Elizabeth looked at Victor. \"I know Bertie may want us to keep the police out of this, but there are things we need to know. I want you to work with Detective Inspector Covington to find out as much as you can about the gun that was used.\"\n\nVictor nodded.\n\n\"What about me?\" Penelope asked.\n\n\"I'd like you to talk to the servants. I'm sure they can tell you plenty about what was going on, plus, they've probably spent more time with Rebecca than anyone else.\"\n\nPenelope nodded. \"What are you going to do?\"\n\nLady Elizabeth hesitated. \"I'm going to try and make sense of this. If you stop and think about it, it really doesn't make any sense. Why would anyone want to kill the maid?\"\n\n\"You think the duchess was the intended victim?\" Victor asked.\n\nLady Elizabeth shook her head. \"I don't know. This whole thing seems like an elaborate charade.\"\n\nDaphne leaned forward. \"I know what you mean. There are diplomats from all over the world staying under one roof. The world is on the brink of war and the tension is thick enough to cut with a knife and the only casualty is a French maid.\"\n\n\"Exactly.\" Lady Elizabeth was surprised at her niece's perception. \"I feel this whole thing has been staged.\"\n\n\"But the duchess arranged the whole thing. Surely she must be the puppeteer behind the scenes,\" Victor said.\n\nLady Elizabeth frowned. \"Maybe. Wallis certainly has her own motives, but I'm not sure she is . . . well, to be completely honest, I don't think she's smart enough to be the mastermind behind this.\"\n\n\"Who then?\" Victor asked.\n\n\"I don't know, but I'm going to find out.\"\n\nChapter 16\n\nI woke up bright and early Sunday morning. Despite getting less than eight hours of sleep, I felt happy and alert. My good mood could have been attributed to the eight-thousand-dollar check in my purse. Or it could be related to the fact the twins had Snickers and Oreo and I was able to sleep past three. A night without my dogs was nice, but awkward. It felt weird not to have to look under my feet before I stood up or went down a flight of stairs, to make sure I didn't step on or trip over a lounging poodle.\n\nI showered and put on one of my new outfits, a denim dress that was fitted at the top and flared at the bottom. I had a cup of coffee and sniffed my flowers, which made me smile. I picked up my cell and sent a thank-you text message.\n\n\"What are you grinning at?\" Nana Jo came into the kitchen and hopped on a barstool.\n\n\"Nothing. I'm just very thankful.\"\n\nShe sipped the coffee I handed her. \"Well, I suppose you have eight thousand reasons to be.\"\n\n\"I got a text from Dawson. He said his dad is still in the coma. He's going to stay there with him.\"\n\nShe nodded. \"Maybe we can take him something to eat later today.\"\n\n\"That's a great idea.\" I looked at the time. \"You should come to church with Mom and me today. I'll treat you to dinner and we can pick up the girls and head to MISU for the memorial service. Afterward, we'll go check on Dawson.\"\n\nNana Jo agreed and got dressed.\n\nMy mom attended a large church located in downtown South Harbor. The building was brick but painted white with stained glass, a steeple, and bells. The church was one hundred and twelve years old and from the outside, nothing much had changed over the years. The changes were more noticeable inside. It still had a large pipe organ, but there was also a keyboard, a synthesizer, and drums. The pastor who baptized me and my sister as children died a few years ago. The new minister was very young. The congregation had grown substantially since Pastor Andy Timmons was installed. His messages were contemporary, as was the music. This change caused dissatisfaction from the older members, who were steeped in the traditional hymns and messages from decades gone by. To his credit, Pastor Timmons had done a fine job of finding the middle ground. The church now had two services. The first was traditional, with hymns and organ music. The second service was much more contemporary, with upbeat music.\n\nNormally, I found the traditional hymns boring and dreary. Today I felt comfort in the ritual of tradition and sang songs of thanks with a glad heart.\n\nAfterward, I treated Nana Jo and my mom to brunch at the Boulevard Hotel, one of the oldest and nicest hotels in South Harbor. When my mom learned we were going to River Bend to see Dawson, she insisted on picking up flowers for us to take with us. Nana Jo and I picked up extra flowers to take to the memorial service for Melody. We invited Mom to go along, but she declined with a vague excuse. I dropped her at home and headed to the retirement village and picked up the girls.\n\nAs arranged, I met Jillian and Emma at the student union. I was surprised to see Zaq there too, although I gathered he was there for Emma and not Melody. The memorial service was to be held at the campus chapel, a quaint building in the center of campus. The chapel had wooden pews, stained glass windows, and an ornately carved altar of dark mahogany. The building was small and only held about one hundred people, which didn't seem to be a problem. Only about twenty people showed up, despite the flyers Jillian placed all over campus and the announcement she put in the school newspaper.\n\nWe mingled among the few guests, but with a crowd this small, there wasn't much to find out. When I bought the flowers, I also picked up a memorial book for signatures. I planned to send it to Cassidy when this was over.\n\nI was disappointed by the low turnout until I saw Professor Harley Quin walk in. I smiled as he approached. I was glad I had on one of my new dresses.\n\n\"Hello, beautiful. You look amazing.\"\n\n\"What a lovely greeting,\" I said.\n\n\"I'll bet you say that to all the girls.\" Nana Jo smiled.\n\n\"Nana Jo, this is a friend, Professor Harley Quin. He's helping with my book.\" I turned to Harley. \"This is my grandmother, Nana Jo.\"\n\nNormally, Nana Jo was super friendly, but there was an edge to her voice. She held out her hand. \"Nice to meet you.\" She shook his hand. \"Please, call me Josephine.\"\n\nHeat rushed to my face. Harley raised an eyebrow but smiled.\n\nAn awkward silence followed. I struggled to think of something to fill the gap. I looked around. Virgil Russell had entered the chapel. \"Isn't that Virgil Russell?\"\n\nNana Jo looked but then turned back to Harley. \"Professor Quin, weren't you Melody's teacher?\"\n\n\"Quite so. Quite so. Although, I didn't know her. In fact, I'm not sure I actually ever met her personally. I gather she didn't attend many classes.\"\n\n\"But she was getting an A in your class. That's rather odd, don't you think?\"\n\nNana Jo was staring at Harley as if he were one of the students in her class. She was tall and could be very intimidating when she wanted to, and apparently she wanted to be today.\n\n\"I asked Harley about that. It turns out it was all just an error with the computer system,\" I said.\n\n\"Hmm . . . convenient,\" Nana Jo mumbled just loud enough for Harley to hear.\n\nHe laughed. \"I have to admit, I'm not great with computers, and the system they use here in the States is different from the one I used back home in England.\"\n\n\"Where exactly are you from?\" she asked.\n\n\"He's British,\" I said.\n\n\"I can tell by the accent.\" Nana Jo smiled. \"I meant, where in Great Britain?\"\n\nHe chuckled. \"It's a very small village. I doubt if you've ever heard of it\u2014\"\n\n\"Try me.\"\n\n\"It's a small town . . . Deering Vale. Ever heard of it?\"\n\nNana Jo hesitated. \"It sounds vaguely familiar.\"\n\n\"One English village is much like another. Small thatched roof cottages, a church, a pub, and a lot of sheep.\" He laughed.\n\n\"What brings you to North Harbor?\"\n\n\"I'm researching a book on the House of David. Fascinating stuff.\"\n\nI stood behind Harley and caught Nana Jo's gaze. I raised my eyebrows and flicked my head to the side to indicate she should scram.\n\nShe looked at the door. \"My God, it's Stinky Pitt.\"\n\nI turned. Detective Pitt was standing against the wall.\n\nHarley looked startled.\n\n\"Well, it's been a pleasure meeting you, Dr. Quin, but I've got to go and . . . talk to a friend. Please excuse me.\"\n\nWhen Nana Jo left, I exhaled, and Harley looked at me and laughed. \"Your grandmother is very protective.\" He pulled at his collar but smiled.\n\n\"I'm sorry. Usually she's very friendly.\"\n\nHe placed his arm around my back and whispered in my ear, \"Maybe she hasn't felt like you needed protecting before.\"\n\nMy stomach fluttered. My face heated and I knew I had a silly grin on my face, but I couldn't stop myself. His breath caressed my neck and my heart pounded in my ears. I turned my head slightly and looked in his eyes and giggled like a schoolgirl.\n\nHe smiled but didn't remove his hand from my waist.\n\nI was grateful when the minister stood and asked everyone to take their seats.\n\nWith his hand on my back, Harley steered me to a seat near the front of the small church on the opposite end of the pew from where Nana Jo was sitting with the girls.\n\nWe took our seats.\n\nJillian read a scripture from the Bible. Everyone recited the Lord's Prayer. The minister said a few words. It was clear he hadn't known Melody, but he talked about a young life taken too soon and the promise of eternity in heaven. He then asked if anyone wished to speak about Melody. No one moved, and I was concerned no one would get up. Imagine my surprise when Nana Jo rose and walked to the front.\n\n\"I only met Melody a couple of days before she died, but she was an intelligent girl who had experienced a great deal of trouble in her young life. Despite those obstacles, she found a way to escape. She knew a lot about people and mastered a number of skills in her young life. She used her skills and her assets to move ahead. She had tremendous plans. Unfortunately, someone thwarted her plans. I always feel it's such a shame when young people are taken from this earth without a chance to live and experience life.\"\n\nI was thoroughly amazed. Everything she said was the truth, but there was definitely more behind her words, much would only have meaning to a small few. Nana Jo was brilliant.\n\nOnce Nana Jo got the ball rolling, several others rose and said nice things, including Emma and Jillian. The last to speak was Virgil Russell. He seemed genuinely grieved. He spoke of Melody's beauty and her strength. He pulled out a handkerchief and hurriedly sat down.\n\nWhen no one else got up, the minister thanked everyone for coming and encouraged us to seek peace in the Word of God and then prayed and dismissed us. Irma immediately sidled up to Virgil Russell, while Nana Jo talked to Stinky Pitt. Dorothy talked to Jillian and a small group of students. Everyone was working and here I was, sitting with Harley. I felt guilty. My focus should be on finding Melody's killer.\n\n\"Thank you again for the flowers. They were lovely.\"\n\nHe leaned close and whispered, \"They were really a bribe.\"\n\n\"A bribe?\"\n\n\"I'm hoping you'll go out again with me.\"\n\n\"You don't have to bribe me to go out with you,\" I said. \"All you have to do is ask.\"\n\n\"Good. How about dinner?\"\n\n\"I'm sorry, I can't tonight. I have to check on Dawson. His dad's in the hospital.\"\n\nHarley looked surprised. \"Really? Is he going to be okay?\"\n\n\"We don't know. He was hit by a car. He's in intensive care. It doesn't look good.\"\n\n\"I'm very sorry to hear that.\" He did look sorry too, really troubled. \"Which hospital?\"\n\n\"Memorial in River Bend. How about tomorrow night?\" I asked.\n\nHe shook his head. \"Sorry. I can't tomorrow night. I've got a late class. Tuesday?\"\n\nI shook my head. \"Tuesday night is girls' night. But I'm free Wednesday.\"\n\n\"Wednesday it is.\"\n\nI thanked Jillian for all her hard work coordinating the memorial, and then we loaded into the car. We stopped once on the way to the hospital and picked up snacks for Dawson. There were several places to eat at the hospital, including a Subway and a River Bend Chocolate Factory. However, I'd seen him eat and knew it would be expensive for him. Nana Jo insisted on getting necessities like underwear, socks, orange juice, peanut butter, and Doritos; just the necessities.\n\nOn the ride to the hospital, Nana Jo filled us in on her conversation with Stinky Pitt. \"He thinks Virgil killed Melody and tried to kill A-squared. He's still waiting for the report on Virgil's car to come back to see if there's any trace evidence from the hit-and-run. In the meantime, he's keeping a close eye on him.\"\n\n\"He seemed genuinely upset about Melody,\" I said.\n\nIrma coughed. \"He was upset alright. I know real grief when I see it.\" She coughed again. \"He knew Melody had other lovers, but he said they had a 'special bond.'\"\n\n\"Yeah right. I'll bet they had a special bond. The dirty old coot,\" Nana Jo said.\n\n\"All I'm saying is he seemed sincere.\" Irma took a swig from her flask.\n\n\"Irma, are you sure that's what he said?\" I asked.\n\nIrma looked offended. \"Of course I'm sure. I'm not senile.\" She coughed.\n\n\"I just meant, are you sure he said Melody had other lovers, plural. Not that she had another love?\" I looked at her in the rearview mirror and saw the look of recognition in her eyes.\n\n\"He definitely said lovers, as in more than one.\" She coughed.\n\n\"But that could mean anything. Maybe he meant, through the years, she's had other lovers,\" Ruby Mae said. \"Nowadays, it isn't uncommon for girls to have had multiple lovers.\"\n\n\"Well, I always had more than one,\" Irma bragged. \"Sometimes it was hard to keep them straight, but boy was it fun.\" She laughed before breaking into a coughing fit.\n\nNana Jo stared at me. \"You're thinking she had another lover, other than Dawson and Virgil.\"\n\n\"Could it have been that Trammel Braxton?\" Dorothy asked.\n\nI shook my head. \"I really don't think so. I think that relationship was over.\"\n\nI drove to the hospital and let the girls out at the front while I parked the car. By the time I made my way to intensive care, Nana Jo and the girls were flocked around Dawson and were mothering him. He was hugged, kissed, fed, and loved. All of them shoved money into his jacket at one time or another. That much concentrated attention could be overwhelming. When I noticed his eyes glaze over, I suggested the girls go down to the gift shop.\n\nWhen they were gone, Dawson sat next to me and released a heavy sigh. \"Thank you. They're amazing, but I was starting to feel a little smothered.\"\n\n\"They really care about you.\"\n\nHe nodded. \"I know. I care about them too, but it's been pretty emotional. Nothing to do but think.\"\n\n\"You sleeping?\"\n\nHe shook his head. \"Some, but it's not easy. The nurses have been great. There's a nurses' lounge and they let me sleep in there. When he gets out of intensive care, then I can sleep on a cot in his room.\"\n\n\"Any idea when that will be?\"\n\nHe shook his head.\n\nWe visited a little longer and then the girls and I headed back to Michigan. I dropped Nana Jo and the girls at the retirement village and then swung by Jenna's to pick up Oreo and Snickers. Jenna claimed she wasn't a big dog lover, but her husband, Tony, was especially fond of Snickers.\n\nWhen I got to her house, Oreo was barking before I got to the front door. He met me at the door and barked nonstop until we left. Snickers, however, was curled up on the sofa with my brother-in-law, watching a football game and eating cheese crackers. She barely looked up to acknowledge my arrival. In fact, I had to pick her up and carry her to the car to get her to leave. Her affections were fickle and could be bought with snacks and belly rubs. She had received both from Tony.\n\nAt home, I let the dogs do their business before heading upstairs. The house felt very lonely without Nana Jo and Dawson. It was comforting to look outside and see a friendly light coming from his apartment. Nana Jo had her own house at the retirement village, but she had spent most nights here at the bookstore since the murder over the summer. I didn't realize how much I relied on her until she wasn't here.\n\nI tried to sleep but something kept nagging at my brain, and I couldn't figure out what it was. I sifted through the information from the day and tried to catch the clue, but it remained elusive. The best I could do was to narrow it down to something that happened at the memorial. However, the harder I tried, the further away it flew. Eventually, I gave up and decided to focus on other things. I got out my laptop.\n\nLady Penelope went down the back stairs to the servants' hall. It had been quite some time since she'd been down here. As she turned the corner at the bottom of the stairs, she couldn't help but glance at the place where she'd fallen as a child. She busted her lip and nearly split her head open. That was probably the closest she'd ever come to seeing Thompkins befuddled. He hurried to fetch the doctor, stopping only long enough to scold the housemaid for waxing the floors to such a dangerous state. Mrs. McDuffie had been the calm one. She had picked up the crying girl and rocked her to sleep, while holding a towel to the cut to staunch the bleeding.\n\nIn the hall, Thompkins and the other servants were just finishing their meal but saw Lady Penelope and immediately stood at attention.\n\n\"I'm terribly sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt your breakfast.\"\n\n\"Can we help you, Lady Carlston?\" Thompkins asked.\n\nPenelope had only been married a few months and still smiled every time she heard herself addressed as Lady Carlston. But she stifled the smile and looked at the servants. \"I wanted to talk to you all. Won't you please sit down?\" She took a seat at the large table, knowing the others would never sit while she stood.\n\nThe servants seemed confused and looked to Thompkins, who gave a slight nod indicating they could sit.\n\nPenelope looked around the table. \"I know you've all heard about the terrible accident yesterday.\"\n\nEveryone nodded.\n\n\"Well, we were hoping you could help us.\"\n\nThompkins coughed discreetly. \"We will, of course, be happy to assist in any way we can.\"\n\nShe looked around and saw confusion. \"Perhaps you could tell me anything you saw that seemed unusual.\" Penelope sat back.\n\nThe servants looked at each other. One of the housemaids squirmed in her chair.\n\nMrs. McDuffie smiled at Penelope. \"Well, I don't know much that'll 'elp. We didn't 'ave much to say to the little tart.\"\n\n\"Mrs. McDuffie,\" Thompkins said.\n\nPenelope smiled and help up a hand. \"It's okay, Thompkins. I hate to admit it, but we didn't like her very much either.\" She leaned toward Mrs. McDuffie. \"Please go on.\"\n\n\"Well, we didn't really get to know much about 'er. Thought she was too good for the likes of us.\"\n\n\"How do you mean?\" Penelope asked.\n\nFlossie leaned forward. \"It were the way she talked, ma'am.\" Flossie put her nose in the air and looked down it. \"Zis is the way Her Royal Highness prefers her coffee.\"\n\nThe others snickered.\n\nJim, the footman, joined in, \"I tried to talk to her when she first arrived, but she give me the cold shoulder and made it clear I wasn't good enough to shine her shoes.\"\n\n\"And our Jim is one of the best bowlers in England.\" Mrs. McDuffie sniffed.\n\nFrank chuckled. \"I don't think she cared much for cricket.\"\n\nFlossie poked Gladys in the ribs and gave her a stern look.\n\nGladys looked up and took a deep breath. \"I tried to talk to her too, just to be friendly. I offered to help her unpack her things, but she said she didn't need to unpack. Said she wouldn't be staying here long. She was going to be rich and moving into her own mansion where she would be the mistress and have her own servants.\"\n\n\"Pshaw.\" Mrs. McDuffie snorted.\n\n\"Did she really? I don't suppose she mentioned how she was planning to do this?\" Penelope asked.\n\nGladys shook her head. \"I'm sorry, m'lady. She didn't say how. She just said she'd been watching her mistress and copying her mannerisms. She\u2014\" Gladys's face flushed.\n\n\"It's okay, Gladys. You can tell me what she said.\" Penelope smiled.\n\n\"Well, she said if an American divorc\u00e9e could snare a king, then she should at least be able to catch a lord,\" Gladys said.\n\nThompkins gasped.\n\nMrs. McDuffie snorted again.\n\n\"I don't suppose she mentioned which lord she had in mind?\"\n\nGladys shook her head. \"No, ma'am.\"\n\nFlossie looked uncomfortable but took a deep breath. \"I think I know, miss.\" She looked at Thompkins, who nodded. \"Well, I told Mr. Thompkins about seeing Lord Chitterly coming out of the duchess's room.\"\n\n\"Yes. We know about that,\" Penelope said.\n\n\"But it weren't the duchess's room at all. It were her room, Rebecca. She and the duchess had switched rooms. I went in to clean and I saw her, Rebecca, I mean. She weren't wearing no clothes.\"\n\nMrs. McDuffie gasped. \"The little trollop.\"\n\n\"But I don't understand,\" Penelope said.\n\n\"She said the duchess wanted the room next to that German bloke, and her mistress didn't care that the other room was smaller. So, they switched.\"\n\n\"So Lord Chitterly had been with Rebecca and not the duchess?\" Penelope asked.\n\nFlossie nodded. \"Yes, m'lady.\"\n\nPenelope nodded. \"Very interesting.\"\n\nWhile Penelope was downstairs questioning the servants, Victor headed to Scotland Yard to talk to Detective Inspector Covington. He'd never been to Scotland Yard before and found the technology fascinating. Everywhere he looked there was something new and interesting. He made his way to the detective's desk.\n\nThey shook hands. \"My God, man, I had no idea half this stuff existed. It's no wonder the Yard has the reputation they do.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington smiled. \"The twentieth century technology is good, but nothing beats good old fashioned police work.\" He indicated Victor should sit.\n\nOnce both men were seated, he continued, \"But I don't think you drove all the way out here just to check out the latest technology at the Yard.\"\n\nOn the drive from the country, Victor had rehearsed several excuses to explain his presence. Face to face with the detective, none of them seemed believable. \"Actually, old man, I wanted to know if you've determined which gun killed the maid.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington looked around. \"I'm not working on that case. I've been pulled to work on a case of poaching in Shrewsbury.\"\n\nVictor stared. \"Poaching?\"\n\n\"Yes. Poaching. Serious business, poaching.\"\n\n\"But surely, murder takes precedence over poaching?\" Victor couldn't hide the astonishment in his voice.\n\nDetective Inspector Covington looked around again. He pulled a folder from a drawer and placed it on top of his desk. \"Well, you know poaching is a hanging offense. It threatens the very seat of the British government.\" He winked. \"Nothing more important than finding poachers.\" He tapped the folder and slid it toward him. \"Care for a spot of tea?\"\n\nVictor nodded. \"Yes. I believe I would.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington stood. \"Afraid the canteen is clear down to the other side of the building. It'll take me at least ten minutes to get the tea and get back. Think you'll be okay?\"\n\nVictor nodded.\n\nDetective Inspector Covington ambled down the hall.\n\nAs soon as he was gone, Victor grabbed the folder and opened it.\n\nVictor left before Detective Inspector Covington returned.\n\nWickfield Lodge was a large U-shaped mansion, with the Marsh family's bedrooms on one side of the U and the guest rooms on the other, with a long hallway in between. Lord William needed to talk to Lord Charles. In his present condition, there was no way he could make it to Chitterly's room. Daphne volunteered to help.\n\nShe stood in front of the guest room now occupied by the Chitterlys. Just as she raised her hand to knock, one of the nearby doors opened. She turned and saw James. Her first instinct was to smile until she remembered this wasn't the room set aside for the Duke of Kingfordshire. No, this wasn't his room. She thought for a moment and remembered the arrangements her aunt had shared. This was Virginia Hall's bedroom.\n\nHe saw her and had the decency to blush. \"Daphne. What are you doing here?\"\n\n\"Just getting Lord Charles. My uncle wants to talk to him.\" She knocked on the door.\n\n\"I can explain.\"\n\n\"No need.\"\n\nCharles Chitterly opened the door. \"Yes?\"\n\n\"My uncle was hoping you would join him for tea. He's had an attack of gout and is confined to his bedroom at the moment, but if you don't mind following me, I'll be happy to lead the way.\"\n\nLord Charles smiled. \"I would like nothing better, my dear.\"\n\nDaphne nodded at James as she walked arm in arm with Lord Charles down the hall.\n\nChapter 17\n\nMonday morning I had to get back to my routine. Fall break was over and the twins were back in school. Nana Jo promised to swing by at noon to give me a few hours break. The morning went by slowly, and I was soon missing both Nana Jo and Dawson a lot. Not just because of the help they provided, but they were also good company.\n\nWe'd gone through the stockpile of baked goods Dawson had left, so I ordered quite a few things from a South Harbor bakery that delivered. The baked goods were tasty but lacked the extra special oomph Dawson's had. Admittedly, I might be slightly biased.\n\nNana Jo arrived promptly at noon. I went to the bank and deposited the check I'd been carrying around all weekend. Then I swung by a fast-food restaurant and grabbed a sandwich. As I was driving back to the store, I spotted a bright red Ford Escape on the edge of the parking lot of a large car dealership. Before I realized what I was doing, I pulled into the lot. As soon as I got out of the car, salesmen swarmed around me like locusts. My personal feeling is there is a special level of hell where the inhabitants are continually haggling with salesmen and buying and selling cars. It's just above the level where your penance for a life of evil is spent buying and selling real estate.\n\nLeon had taken care of things like haggling with car salesmen. However, I was a big girl and refused to be intimidated.\n\n\"I'm just looking!\" I shouted. I pointed to one of the salesmen. \"What's your name?\"\n\n\"Bob.\" He stepped forward and reached out his hand. He opened his mouth to start his sales pitch but was halted when I held up my hand.\n\n\"Bob. I want to look at SUVs. I don't want to be bothered. Don't follow me. Don't help me. When I need you, I will come find you. Understood?\" I looked around at all of the salesmen. They all nodded and backed away.\n\nThe new models were on one side of the lot and the other side had a variety of used cars. The red Escape was last year's model and had thirty thousand miles, but it had a sunroof, leather seats, and tons of other bells and whistles I didn't even know existed. I spotted Bob about three aisles over and waved for him to join me.\n\n\"You were waving for me, right?\" he asked, out of breath from his quick jog.\n\n\"Yes. I have questions.\"\n\nBob answered all of my questions and went inside to get the keys so I could take a test drive. I showed him my driver's license, and he came back with a license plate, which he stuck in the back window and gave me a large key fob. I stared at it. There was no key.\n\nBob laughed and explained all I had to do was push a button and, as long as I had the fob within a certain range, the car would respond. The doors unlocked. The motor started. It was magic.\n\nI drove the car in a big loop around the block, which included a short jaunt on Interstate 94. I was amazed at how quiet the car was and how smooth the ride. Bob talked the entire test drive, explaining every feature he thought would sell me on the car. Little did he know, I was sold at intermittent wipers and automatic lights. I would have been happy with lights that dinged when left on. These lights actually turned themselves on and off, like magic.\n\nBack at the car lot, Bob asked if I had a trade-in. I escorted him to my SUV. I was insulted when he asked if I wanted to get it repaired before I got my trade-in estimate.\n\n\"If I wanted to get the car repaired, I wouldn't be buying a new one.\" I pointed out that all of the pieces were there and showed him the knobs in the ashtray.\n\nI looked at my watch. I needed to get back to the bookstore. Bob did everything he could to get me to stay, including a suggestion that I put a deposit down on the vehicle to make sure no one bought it before I returned. I declined. If it was gone in a few hours, then it wasn't meant to be.\n\nAt the bookstore, Nana Jo took one look at me and knew something was up. I had planned to surprise her when I arrived with the car, but she always knew when something was going on with me.\n\n\"It's about time,\" she teased when I told her about the car. \"You can go back. I can handle things here.\"\n\nThe store wasn't busy. In fact, she was reading an Agatha Christie collection of short stories, The Mysterious Mr. Quin. However, now that I'd told her, I wanted her to see it before I bought it. I wanted her approval.\n\nThe hours until closing passed very slowly. When it finally did arrive, we dashed off to the car lot. My red SUV was still parked where I'd left it, and I breathed a sigh of relief.\n\nNana Jo heartily approved. I'd completed some of the paperwork for financing before I left and when we returned, I learned the trade-in amount for my CRV and the rate the dealership offered for financing. If Bob thought I had been tough on him earlier, he learned I was a lightweight compared to Nana Jo. She pulled out her iPhone and went to a few websites. By the time she finished negotiating, I got the car for five thousand dollars less and 2 percent better interest rate. We transferred my belongings from the Honda, and my heart tugged the slightest bit as I took one last look. I smiled and gave her a pat. \"You served me well.\"\n\nI signed a ton of papers, shook hands with Bob, and drove my new SUV off the lot.\n\n\"Open the sunroof. Let's go pick up the girls and go for a spin,\" Nana Jo said.\n\nBefore we could head to the retirement village, I got a call from Dawson. The rings vibrated throughout the car's stereo system.\n\n\"What on earth . . .\" I said.\n\nNana Jo laughed. \"You have Bluetooth. I synched your phone with the car while you were talking to Bob. Touch that button there.\" She pointed.\n\nI pushed the button and Dawson's voice came through the speakers. \"Someone just tried to kill my dad.\"\n\n\"Oh my God. Are you okay?\"\n\n\"Yeah. I'm okay.\"\n\n\"Call the police. We'll be there in thirty minutes.\"\nChapter 18\n\nI didn't remember parking the car at the hospital. After disconnecting with Dawson, my next memory was giving him a big hug. Dawson was about a foot taller than me and probably a hundred pounds heavier, but when I put my arms around him, he bent down, put his head on my shoulder, and wept. I held him with everything I had. A few minutes, hours, who knew how long that embrace lasted, but I knew at that moment Dawson Alexander would forever be a part of my family, and I would do anything to protect him.\n\nWhen Dawson was composed, he straightened up and I got a good look at him. He looked haggard. There were dark circles under his eyes.\n\nNana Jo gave him a fierce hug, then pulled his face close. She stared into his eyes as though she were looking into his soul. \"You look terrible. You need a good meal and sleep.\"\n\nDawson kissed her on the cheek. \"I'm fine, Mrs. T.\"\n\n\"What happened?\" I asked.\n\nHe ran his hand through his hair. \"I was in the lounge, lying on a sofa watching television.\" He lowered his eyes. \"I should have been watching him.\"\n\n\"You can't blame yourself for this.\" I rubbed his shoulders. I hoped he felt reassured, although I doubted it. I'd gone through similar feelings of guilt when my husband died in the middle of the night. I should have been there. I should have single-handedly fought back death. I should have stayed by his side and watched him night and day. I should have forced him to go to the doctor for regular checkups years earlier. Regret was the survivor's burden. Like cancer, it got in your mind and ate away your common sense and reason. \"Your dad's still alive. Focus on that for now.\"\n\nDawson took a deep breath. \"One of the nurses came in and said I had a package at the front desk.\"\n\n\"That's odd. Don't they bring packages up to the room?\" I asked.\n\n\"I thought so too, but the nurse said he told her it was from you. He said the volunteers were gone for the day. If I came down to the lobby, I could pick it up now. Otherwise, it would be delivered tomorrow. I thought it was another pizza like the one you sent last night.\"\n\nI frowned. I hadn't sent Dawson a pizza, but apparently someone else had.\n\n\"I went down to the lobby. No one knew anything about a package.\" He looked up and pointed. \"That's when I saw him.\"\n\nWe followed where he was pointing. That's when we noticed Virgil Russell sitting at a desk in a small room off the nurses' station. He was covered in blood and was holding a bloody towel to his nose with his head tilted back.\n\n\"Virgil Russell?\" Nana Jo asked.\n\nDawson nodded. \"He claimed I sent him a note, but I didn't. So we rushed back up here and all hell had broken loose. Lights and alarms were going off in my dad's room. There were tons of people in there working on him.\" He looked at his hands. \"That's when I hit him.\"\n\n\"Good,\" Nana Jo said.\n\n\"Nana Jo, you shouldn't encourage violence.\"\n\nShe sniffed.\n\nThe elevator opened and Stinky Pitt and a uniformed policeman stepped out and walked toward us.\n\nOne of the doctors came out of the room and said a few words to the two officers. The officer took up his position in front of A-squared's door. Detective Pitt and the doctor joined us on the sofa.\n\n\"Your father had a really close call. If he hadn't been in a coma, he'd be dead now. In fact, I'm not sure why he isn't. He's a fighter. We'll know more in the next twenty-four hours. All we can do now is wait.\" The doctor left.\n\nDetective Pitt wanted to know what happened. Dawson repeated what he'd said to us. He asked a few questions and then Detective Pitt went to talk to Virgil.\n\nNana Jo wandered near the nurses' station outside the room where Detective Pitt and Virgil were talking. When I saw what she was doing, I told Dawson to wait there and I joined her at the desk. Unfortunately, when Detective Pitt turned and saw us standing nearby, he closed the door.\n\nOne of the nurses who had been sitting behind the desk looked up. She had a sympathetic face, and I'd seen her before when I visited. She winked at me, put a finger to her lips, and motioned for us to follow her. She led us behind the nurses' station, around a corner. There was a small room, barely bigger than a closet. There was a refrigerator and microwave and a small sliding door, which looked like a concession stand opening. The door was slightly ajar and we could hear everything in the room where Detective Pitt and Virgil Russell were sitting. We mouthed the words thank you. Our friendly nurse smiled and quietly returned to her desk.\n\n\"Come back to finish the job, did you?\" Detective Pitt asked.\n\n\"I never laid one hand on him,\" Virgil said in a muffled voice.\n\n\"What brought you here tonight?\"\n\n\"I got a note from Dawson to meet him here. He said he wanted to talk about Melody.\"\n\nNana Jo and I exchanged a glance.\n\n\"What note?\"\n\nWe heard fumbling and then the sound of a note being opened.\n\n\"Did you ask him about this?\"\n\n\"I never got the chance.\"\n\nWe heard the sound of a door opening and hurried back around the nurses' station. We took a roundabout route back to the sofa where Dawson was sitting. Detective Pitt stood nearby.\n\n\"Where have you two been?\" he asked.\n\n\"Ladies' room. I've got a weak bladder,\" Nana Jo said. \"It comes with old age.\"\n\n\"You got a weak bladder too?\" He looked at me.\n\n\"Do you have a weak bladder is the correct question.\" I stared at the detective. \"And, the answer is no. I do not.\"\n\n\"Women tend to go to the bathroom in pairs,\" Nana Jo added. \"Surely you've noticed, Stinky Pitt.\"\n\nA slight rise of color went up the detective's neck. Whether it was anger for the grammar lesson or frustration with Nana Jo for using his childhood nickname, I couldn't hazard a guess.\n\nHe turned to Dawson and held up a note. \"Did you send this?\"\n\nDawson reached out a hand, but Detective Pitt held it out of reach. \"Just look. Don't touch. Probably a slim chance we'll find any prints, but it's still evidence.\" He held the paper from the corners so Dawson could look.\n\nI strained to read the note, but Nana Jo was quicker and pulled out her iPhone and snapped a picture before Detective Pitt knew what was happening. She stretched the photo, and I looked over her shoulder and read the note.\n\nIf you want to know what happened to Melody,  \ncome round to the surgery at nine.\n\nThe note was on hospital stationery but didn't have a signature. Something about the note struck me as off.\n\n\"What's wrong?\" Nana Jo asked.\n\n\"I don't know. Something just seems . . . odd about that note.\"\n\n\"I know. I was thinking the same thing, but I can't figure out what it is.\"\n\n\"Well, I wish someone would tell me what it is,\" Detective Pitt muttered. \"Did you write this?\" He looked at Dawson.\n\nHe shook his head. \"Never seen it before.\"\n\n\"When did he get it?\" I asked.\n\nDetective Pitt looked puzzled, then turned and walked to the room where Virgil sat. He said a few words to him and then returned.\n\n\"Said he found it on the windshield of his car.\"\n\n\"But, I haven't left the hospital since my dad was admitted,\" Dawson said.\n\n\"How did he know A-squared was here? I haven't seen it in the papers.\" Nana Jo asked.\n\n\"Did you tell anyone?\" Detective Pitt asked Dawson.\n\n\"No. I haven't left the hospital.\" Dawson gritted his teeth.\n\n\"I might have mentioned it to a few people.\" I severely hoped I wasn't responsible for this attack.\n\n\"Who?\" Detective Pitt didn't look at all sympathetic.\n\n\"Well, I told Jenna and Chris and Zaq. I'm pretty sure I told Emma and Jillian. The girls from the nursing home and Professor Quin.\"\n\n\"Why didn't you just put an ad in the newspaper? It would have been faster.\"\n\n\"Stop. Can't you see she feels bad enough as it is?\" Nana Jo put a comforting arm around my shoulders.\n\nDetective Pitt grunted. \"Was Virgil Russell around when you told any of those people?\"\n\nI thought for a moment. \"He might have overheard when I told Professor Quin at Melody's memorial service.\"\n\nDetective Pitt asked a few more questions, then he got Virgil, and asked him to accompany him to the police station to answer questions. \"You can even file a report against Mr. Alexander for assault, if you'd like.\"\n\nNana Jo scowled at Stinky Pitt. I held onto Dawson's hand.\n\nVirgil Russell stared at Dawson, who didn't look contrite or repentant in the least. In fact, he looked like he'd like nothing better than to take another swing at him if given the chance. He and Dawson stared at each other like two boxers sizing each other up before a fight. During that exchange, something happened. Maybe Virgil realized Dawson was younger, bigger, and stronger than him. \"Nawh, I won't be filing no police report.\"\n\nStinky Pitt escorted Virgil to the elevator.\n\n\"What just happened there?\" Nana Jo asked as the elevator closed behind the two men.\n\n\"I have no idea.\"\n\nNana Jo and I offered to stay at the hospital, but Dawson urged us to go home. I was prepared to camp out, despite his assurances he would be fine.\n\n\"I appreciate you both for driving all the way here, but I'm fine. No one can try anything now. The hospital is on alert. There's a cop standing guard, and I'm not going to be fooled into leaving again.\"\n\n\"But we want to help,\" I said.\n\nDawson looked very intense. \"Then find out who killed Melody and who tried to kill my dad.\"\n\n* * *\n\nNana Jo and I tried to figure out what was bothering us about the note during the drive home. Neither of us could put our finger on it. She sent me the picture of Virgil's note so I could study it later. I tried to figure out what was nagging at my mind. Was it possible A-squared really knew who killed Melody? Whoever killed Melody tried to kill him. Why did he wait until now to make another attempt?\n\nIt was late or rather early morning by the time we made it home. Oreo and Snickers were knocked out. Not even turning on the lights woke them. I literally had to pick them up to take them out to take care of business. They immediately got back in their beds when they were done, but I didn't even try to sleep.\n\n\"Wallis claims she and Count Rudolph were talking all night.\" Lady Elizabeth pursed her lips as she continued knitting.\n\n\"Talking? Really, and they had to do this in his bedroom?\" Penelope asked.\n\n\"That's what she claims, dear.\"\n\nSomething in her aunt's voice made Penelope stare at her in disbelief. \"Don't tell me you believe her?\"\n\nLady Elizabeth knitted a few stitches and then paused. \"Actually, I do.\"\n\n\"But that's crazy. Why would she be in the count's bedroom? If they wanted to talk, there are over a hundred rooms in this house where they could have 'talked.' \"\n\n\"True, dear, but you have to remember, Wallis was trying to negotiate some type of agreement. They needed a place that was private.\" Lady Elizabeth looked at her family. \"I'm not saying it was wise, but I did believe her when she said she wasn't having an affair with Count Rudolph.\"\n\n\"Despite the fact that she's practically thrown herself at him the entire time she's been here?\" Penelope asked.\n\n\"Yes. Wallis isn't beautiful. She's a flirt and she knows how to use her sex appeal to attract men. But take a look at the type of men she attracts.\"\n\n\"I don't think I understand you, dear?\" Lord William looked at his wife as he sat in his bed with his leg propped up on pillows.\n\n\"I think I know what you mean,\" Daphne said from her seat near the window. She had a large drawing pad on her lap and appeared to be sketching. \"She seems to flirt with men who aren't very bright and who aren't . . . very manly.\"\n\n\"Exactly.\" Lady Elizabeth smiled at her niece. \"Let's face it, David isn't exactly known for his brains. He's always been a bit spoiled,\" she said thoughtfully. \"He liked women, dancing, drinking, and having fun. He was a playboy.\"\n\nVictor stood against the wall and smoked. \"He was the king. He could have had any woman he wanted.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth picked up her knitting. \"And who does he choose? A married woman with two living husbands. There's no way he believed he would be allowed to reign as the head of the Church of England.\"\n\nDaphne looked at her aunt. \"You think he married her to escape being king?\"\n\n\"Yes, I do.\"\n\n\"But why did she marry him?\" Penelope asked.\n\nLady Elizabeth knitted. \"I think Wallis is one of those women who's always attracted to the wrong type of men. She doesn't want a strong man. She wants a man she can manipulate and control, someone who will never love her, not in the real way a man loves a woman.\" Lady Elizabeth blushed slightly.\n\nLord William fumbled with his pipe. \"Well, I'll be.\"\n\n\"In David, she found someone in need of a mother figure. In Count Rudolph . . . well, I suspect she has found someone who is struggling with his own sexuality.\"\n\n\"My word,\" Lord William said.\n\n\"He is a bit of a dandy,\" Victor said.\n\n\"That explains why he never made a pass at me,\" Daphne said. \"Most men do, but Count Rudolph never did.\" She looked very serious.\n\nEveryone stared at Daphne for several seconds until they noticed the slightest twitch around her mouth before she broke into a laugh.\n\nEveryone laughed until a knock at the door caused them to stop and stare.\n\nPenelope looked to her aunt, who gave her a slight nod. She walked to the door and opened it slightly. When she looked out, she smiled and opened the door wider. \"James, at last. I thought you'd never get here.\"\n\nThe duke entered the room and Penelope closed the door behind him. Inside, he looked around. His eyes lingered longest on Daphne by the window. \"Sorry I'm late. Have you figured out who the murderer is?\"\n\n\"We were just waiting for Lady Elizabeth to tell us,\" Victor joked. \"Take a seat.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth shook her head and continued to knit. \"I have no idea who the murderer is. I can't even tell who the intended victim was.\"\n\nLady Penelope recapped her conversation with the servants.\n\n\"That goes along with what I learned from Lord Charles,\" Lord William said. \"Darned fool admitted he had a fling with the maid. Called it a bit of fun.\" He pursed his lips as though he had just tasted a bitter lemon. \"Got a nasty shock the next morning. The girl wanted him to divorce his wife and marry her.\"\n\n\"You mean she tried to blackmail him?\" Victor asked.\n\nLord William nodded. \"That's about the size of it. Threatened to tell his wife.\" He chuckled.\n\n\"Well, I don't think that's funny at all.\" Lady Elizabeth frowned at her husband. \"Looks like he had a motive to kill the girl.\"\n\n\"Except, Lord Charles had no intention of leaving his wife. She's got all the money.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth nodded. \"I thought so. His family has that large estate in Sussex, but no money. He went to America and came back with an American heiress.\"\n\n\"He'd have to go to America to find someone who'd marry him,\" Daphne added. \"His reputation in England was abominable.\"\n\n\"Yes. He was definitely a womanizer,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\n\"He could have killed her to keep his wife from finding out,\" Penelope said.\n\n\"She'd have to be deaf, dumb, and blind not to know her husband was a womanizer,\" Daphne said. \"And I think Lady Abigail is a very intelligent woman.\"\n\nEveryone stared at Daphne.\n\n\"I spent time with her after the shoot. She's very intelligent. Graduated from Smith College in the States.\"\n\n\"If she's so smart, why'd she marry an old bore like Charles Chitterly?\" Penelope frowned.\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled. \"Well, she's not very attractive. Maybe she didn't have a lot of other op tions.\"\n\n\"Exactly,\" Daphne added. \"She's very ambitious. I believe she plans to see that Lord Charles advances, politically.\"\n\n\"A woman with that type of ambition might not want to have her plans ruined by a French maid,\" James said.\n\n\"Didn't you say she was a crack shot who won shooting contests in the States?\" Penelope asked.\n\nDaphne nodded. \"Yes, but I don't think it was her.\"\n\n\"Why not, dear?\" Lady Elizabeth asked.\n\nDaphne looked around as though looking for the right word. \"I don't think she would shoot her in the marsh like that. She'd confront the girl and tell her to, pardon my language, bugger off.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled at her niece. \"I think you're right. That's the impression I have of her as well.\"\n\n\"Well, I had a conversation with Detective Inspector Covington today. You know he's been pulled from the case to find poachers?\"\n\n\"Poachers?\" Penelope stared at her husband. \"You're joking, right?\"\n\nEveryone had a surprised look on their face, except James and Lady Elizabeth. \"Why do I get the feeling the two of you already knew about this?\"\n\nLady Elizabeth pulled yarn from a ball. \"I can't say I knew anything about poachers; however, I did suspect Bertie would do something.\" She sighed. \"The king doesn't want attention drawn to the case. I suspected he might use his considerable influence\u2014\"\n\n\"To delay justice,\" Penelope said.\n\n\"To buy us some time, dear,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\nJames stared at Lady Elizabeth with a look of respect. \"Three days. I just talked to Budgy, ah . . . I mean Chief Inspector Buddington. That's how long we have to solve this before the Met comes in with everything they've got.\"\n\n\"I looked through a report Detective Inspector Covington had on his desk. The maid wasn't shot with any of the guns belonging to Lord William.\"\n\n\"Thank God,\" Lord William said.\n\n\"But if it wasn't one of our guns, then whose gun was it?\" Lady Elizabeth asked.\n\n\"No idea. The constables were pulled off the case before they could search the place,\" Victor said.\n\n\"We could search for it,\" Penelope said.\n\n\"I'm afraid that gun will be long gone by now, dear,\" Lord William said.\n\n\"Agreed. I think it unlikely the killer would risk hanging onto the murder weapon.\" Lady Elizabeth shook her head. \"Pity we didn't think to have the guests searched sooner. But there might be something. . . Yes, we might be able to find out who had a gun before the killing and doesn't have one now.\" She knitted for a few moments. \"I'll have a word with Thompkins about it. Now, Daphne, were you able to make any progress on your assignment?\"\n\nDaphne walked over to her aunt, who was sitting in a chair next to her husband's bedside. Daphne stood in between her aunt and uncle and opened her drawing pad.\n\nThe others gathered close for a better view.\n\n\"I worked out who was where during the shoot.\" She pointed at the sketch pad, which had a timeline and circles indicating who was in each group at what time. \"J\u00f3zef Lipski and Virginia Hall are the only ones who are completely unaccounted for at the time the maid was shot.\"\n\nThey stared at the sketch pad and asked a few questions, which Daphne answered.\n\n\"Daphne, that's wonderful. You did a tremendous job.\" Lady Elizabeth smiled at her niece.\n\nEveryone congratulated Daphne. The only person who seemed less than pleased was James. In a brooding silence, he walked to the window and stared out.\n\n\"James?\" Lady Elizabeth asked. \"What's wrong?\"\n\n\"Nothing.\" James shook himself. \"Virginia Hall is beyond reproach. I know she didn't kill that maid.\"\n\nDaphne sniffed.\n\n\"How can you be sure?\" Lady Elizabeth stared at James.\n\n\"I just know. I need you to trust me.\"\n\nThey looked at each other, everyone except Daphne, who refused to make eye contact.\n\n\"Well, of course we trust you,\" Lady Elizabeth said. \"But can you tell us why you're so sure?\"\n\nJames stared at Daphne as though willing her to make eye contact, but she merely folded up her sketch pad and returned to her seat by the window. James shook his head. \"I'm afraid I can't at the moment, but I promise I'll explain soon.\"\n\n\"Well, if Miss Hall is out, that just leaves Lipski,\" Victor said.\n\nThe group agreed that Victor and James would question J\u00f3zef Lipski immediately following tea.\n\nJames released a heavy sigh.\n\n\"What's the matter?\" Penelope asked.\n\n\"Nothing. I was just thinking about what this will mean if it turns out J\u00f3zef Lipski is indeed the murderer.\" James looked out the window for several minutes. \"This incident could be twisted to justify German aggression toward the Pols and more German expansion in Europe. No one wants another war with Germany, but we won't be able to avoid it forever.\"\n\nEveryone stared in shocked silence.\n\n\"You think war is inevitable?\" Victor asked softly.\n\nJames nodded. \"I do, and I'm not alone. Other prominent people believe Poland is critical in this political chess game Germany's playing.\"\n\nLord William puffed on his pipe. \"Dash it all. I hope it doesn't come to that. I hope you're wrong. If it does, well . . . we beat the krauts once, we can do it again.\"\n\nJames lowered his head. \"The last war took a terrible toll on England and her allies. A lot has changed since the Treaty of Versailles. Advancements. Advance ments in weapons, airplanes, and submarines. Germany's stronger now.\" His eyes lingered on Daphne. \"This could be the match that lights the flame of war. And once that flame is lit, England will never be the same.\"\n\nChapter 19\n\nThe fact I had yet to go to bed did not prevent Oreo from needing to go potty at three thirty in the morning. Sure, I'd let him out just two hours earlier when I got home, but his biological clock was set. Snickers rolled her eyes and growled when I suggested she join us. I couldn't say I blamed her, so I let her sleep in peace.\n\nThis time I was tired enough to sleep. I must have slept through my alarm clock because the next thing I remembered was an eight-pound weight landing on my chest. Snickers was fourteen, and I've had her since she was six weeks old. You'd think by now I would have learned not to open my mouth. Unfortunately, I was a slow learner.\n\n\"Eww.\" I rolled over and dislodged the poodle who'd just stuck her tongue in my mouth. I used the blanket to wipe out my mouth.\n\nSnickers simply jumped off the bed and sat by my bedroom door.\n\nI glared at her. \"Do you know what time it is?\"\n\nShe yawned, stretched, and then began to lick herself.\n\nJust when I thought nothing could make me feel dirtier than I did already. I put a pillow over my head and contemplated ignoring her, but my bladder wouldn't cooperate. I stretched and then got up.\n\nI let the poodles out and then took care of business. By the time I got out of the shower, I got a whiff of my two favorite smells, coffee and bacon. My nana was my hero.\n\nThe day went by relatively quickly. We had a steady stream of customers and I didn't have much time to think about Virgil, A-squared, or Melody. Just before closing, Frank Patterson stopped by.\n\n\"Frank, what a pleasant surprise,\" Nana Jo said in a voice that sounded like she wasn't the least bit surprised.\n\nI should have guessed she was up to something when I noticed the goofy smile on her face when she came back from lunch.\n\n\"Finish all those books already?\" I asked.\n\n\"Not yet. I was wondering if maybe you'd be free for dinner.\"\n\nI smiled. \"Thank you, but I'm afraid I can't. Tonight I'll be hanging out with the girls. It's ladies' night.\"\n\n\"Pishposh,\" Nana Jo interrupted. \"Why don't you join us at the casino tonight?\"\n\nI stared at Nana Jo.\n\nFrank Patterson intercepted the look. \"Well, I don't want to interrupt.\"\n\n\"You won't be interrupting at all,\" Nana Jo said. \"Meet us at the Four Feathers Casino at eight.\"\n\n\"If you're sure it's okay.\" Frank looked at me.\n\nI smiled. \"Of course it's alright. Why don't you meet us in the lobby in front of the large fireplace?\"\n\nFrank agreed and left.\n\nI stared at Nana Jo, who seemed intent on dusting a bookshelf. \"Why do I suspect you arranged that?\"\n\n\"I have no idea what you're talking about.\" She turned to face me. \"But if you didn't want him to come, you could have said something.\"\n\nI smiled. \"You're incorrigible.\"\n\nTuesdays was ladies' day at a lot of local shops. The girls liked to stock up on paper towels, vitamins, and whatever else they could get at bargain prices. I normally would have gotten a half-priced oil change and car wash, but since I'd just bought my car yesterday, I wouldn't need to take advantage of that discount yet. We often dined at Randy's Steak House on Tuesday and then hit the bars for half-priced drinks. However, in light of my recent windfall, the girls were anxious to try their luck at the casino.\n\nThe girls were surprised and gushed appropriately at my new wheels. The hands-free back door was a huge help when loading up after a day of ladies' day shopping.\n\n\"We're ridin' in style now,\" Ruby Mae said.\n\nOn the ride to the casino, we filled the girls in on the latest from Dawson and Virgil Russell.\n\nIrma still doubted Virgil's guilt, but the others felt he was the most likely suspect.\n\nI dropped the girls at the front of the casino and then drove to the back of the parking garage. I parked as far away from potential scratches as possible. When I arrived in the lobby, Frank Patterson was waiting. He had a single rose, which made me smile.\n\n\"Where's Nana Jo?\"\n\n\"They said they'd get a table.\"\n\nFrank had on a pair of dark wash jeans and a sweater. He looked freshly groomed and smelled of shampoo. I liked that he wasn't wearing cologne.\n\nI was wearing one of my outlet mall finds, a silk blouse and bright red cardigan with jeans.\n\nWe walked to the buffet and I looked around until I spotted them. They were sitting at a small booth that could only hold four comfortably. The hostess was talking, but I was so surprised, I didn't hear a word she said. I made a beeline to their booth and stood looking at them.\n\nDorothy and Ruby Mae hopped up and hurried to the buffet. Irma said she needed a drink and flagged down a waiter. Nana Jo was suddenly really thirsty and drank an entire glass of water.\n\n\"Well?\" I stared at my grandmother.\n\n\"Sorry, dear, they didn't have any larger tables. I guess you two will have to find a table alone.\"\n\nI looked around at all of the empty tables and booths, which were clearly large enough for all six of us.\n\nThe hostess followed us and was at my side when I turned around.\n\n\"Come on.\" I followed the young girl to a table for two in a corner.\n\nOnce we were seated and beverage orders taken, I looked across at Frank.\n\nHis lips twitched and he did his best to hide a smile. Eventually, our eyes met and we both burst into laughter.\n\n\"Your grandmother is an exceptional woman.\"\n\n\"If by exceptional you mean meddling busybody, then you're right.\"\n\nWe filled our plates at the buffet and talked for hours. I was surprised at how much we had in common. There wasn't an awkward moment. Frank had a knack for telling interesting stories. He'd retired from the military earlier this year and was living his dream of living in one place and running a bar. \"Kind of like Cheers, a place where everyone knows your name.\"\n\nIt usually took a while before I opened up and shared about my personal life, but Frank was easy to talk to and he listened. He seemed interested in everything from Leon to Oreo and Snickers to Dawson.\n\n\"Your grandmother told me about your investigation. I'd like to help if I can.\"\n\nI stared. \"I'm not sure how you can. It looks like the police might have their killer.\" I shared what I knew about Virgil Russell and the incident at the hospital. Frank asked who knew about A-squared's accident and which hospital he was in.\n\n\"I have some friends who are very connected. Would you mind if I asked them to look up some of the names you gave me?\"\n\n\"Of course not.\"\n\nWe talked about Melody being a grifter, the special program she was in, her sister Cassidy, Virgil, and the mysterious person Melody thought was trying to muscle in on her mark.\n\n\"And you said Virgil mentioned he knew Melody had other lovers?\"\n\nI stared. \"You think the person who was trying to muscle in on her mark was her lover?\"\n\nFrank shrugged. \"Beats me. But it seems odd. She didn't make many friends, not even with her roommate. How else would someone get close enough to her to find out about her scam?\"\n\n\"That makes sense.\"\n\n\"What makes sense?\"\n\nI looked up.\n\nNana Jo was standing by our table. \"Are you two still in here?\"\n\nI looked at my watch. \"I can't believe it's almost midnight. Where's our bill?\"\n\nFrank smiled. \"I've already taken care of it.\"\n\nI started to protest, but he simply smiled. \"I'm old-fashioned. A gentleman always takes care of the bill.\"\n\nWe met the girls in the lobby and I told them I'd get the car and pick them up. I protested, but Frank escorted me to my vehicle and held the door open for me while I got in. He said he'd check with one of his buddies on some of the names I gave him, and he'd have something by tomorrow night.\n\nI drove to the front of the casino and picked up Nana Jo and the girls, who were surprisingly quiet for the majority of the ride back to the retirement village. I expected a lot of teasing about Frank but was pleasantly amazed when none came.\n\nNana Jo stopped in the bookstore and picked up the Agatha Christie book she'd been reading earlier and then went to her room.\n\nI let the poodles out, but something was nagging at my mind. When I went back upstairs, I got on the computer and tried to focus on the clues. I read an article about free writing, where you tried to turn off your conscious mind and let your subconscious write. However, with my eyes closed, my brain kept picturing Frank Patterson and my hands kept typing Quin and Deering Vale. Perhaps writing would help my subconscious grab hold of the elusive thread.\n\nEveryone except the Duchess of Windsor and Lord William assembled in the parlor for tea. Count Rudolph and Georges Brasseur stood near the fireplace.\n\n\"I have never come to understand the British obsession with tea,\" Brasseur said. \"In France we drink wine, or cocoa, but tea . . . it is like drinking dishwater.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth blushed slightly. \"How thoughtless of me. If you would prefer something else, I'll be more than happy to have the cook prepare you something. I'm sure she has cocoa.\"\n\nJ\u00f3zef Lipski stood near the window. \"Ah, but you have not tasted the cocoa until you have tasted Polish cocoa,\" he said proudly and puffed out his chest. \"It is a special blend.\" He pulled a small box from his inside pocket. \"Perhaps you would care to try some?\"\n\nBrasseur looked as though nothing would give him less pleasure than to try the Pol's special blend of cocoa.\n\n\"Thank you so much.\" Lady Elizabeth reached out her hand and Lipski brought the container to her.\n\nShe rang a buzzer that summoned the butler.\n\n\"Thompkins, would you please ask Cook to prepare a cup of cocoa for Monsieur Brasseur and . . . Mr. Lipski?\"\n\nLipski shook his head. \"No, I only drink cocoa before bed.\"\n\nThompkins took the tin and left.\n\nLady Elizabeth continued pouring tea for the rest of the guests. Fordham-Baker declined. He was drinking what appeared to be a new bottle of scotch. The only way she could gauge was by noting the current bottle contained more liquid than the one she'd seen him with earlier. If she weren't trying to keep the maid's murder out of the newspapers, she would talk to Thompkins about restricting his alcohol. However, in light of the current situation, perhaps she should allow the man to continue drinking.\n\nWithin a relatively short period of time, the butler returned with a steaming hot mug, which he presented to the French diplomat.\n\nBrasseur accepted the cup and nodded to Lipski. He placed the cup on the fireplace mantle and continued talking to Count Rudolph.\n\nJ\u00f3zef Lipzki's face turned purple. It was clear Brasseur didn't intend to drink his cocoa.\n\nThompkins walked to Lipski and returned the tin.\n\nLipski took the tin and replaced it in his pocket and turned his back to the crowd and walked to the window.\n\nCount Rudolph, normally very quiet and taciturn, surprised the group by speaking. \"Perhaps we can have more music, or is it not acceptable to play music during the British tea?\" he asked in a very theatrical manner.\n\n\"Well, certainly, you may have music,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\nCount Rudolph followed Daphne to the wireless. When she found a station playing music, he further surprised the group by asking her to waltz.\n\nCount Rudolph bowed dramatically, clicked his heels, and then took Daphne by the waist and waltzed her around the room.\n\nEveryone stared in shocked silence. Virginia Hall approached Lipski, who declined dancing.\n\nThe two stood in awkward silence.\n\nWhen the dance was over, Rudolph bowed to Daphne and returned to his place next to Brasseur.\n\n\"Ah, Monsieur Brasseur, you have not drunk your Polish cocoa. You will offend Heir Lipski. You must taste it and tell us if the Polish cocoa is superior to that of the French.\"\n\nBrasseur looked as though he would rather drink petrol; however, he picked up his cup and took a sip of the liquid. He pursed his lips and frowned. Within a few seconds, he was grasping at his throat and gasping for air. He fell to his knees and then lay prostrate on the ground.\n\nJames hurried to his side. He loosened his shirt and tie.\n\nEveryone looked on in stunned silence.\n\nThe French diplomat was seized by convulsions for several seconds. He foamed at the mouth. After one exceptionally violent shake, he lay silent.\n\nJames felt for a pulse. He looked to the crowd which had gathered around. \"He's dead.\"\n\nChapter 20\n\nI woke from a dream where James Bond was running from all of Agatha Christie's protagonists. Harley Quin was leading a pack which included Hercule Poirot, Miss Marple, Tommy and Tuppence, and Parker Pyne through an English village. At the last minute, Captain America, who bore a striking resemblance to Frank Patterson, dropped from a plane and hog-tied James Bond. Apart from confusion, I felt like I'd run a marathon. Given the knot my sheets were in, I guess I had.\n\nI showered and dressed with care. Tonight I was going on a date with Professor Quin. I had butterflies in the pit of my stomach and considered cancelling. Several times I actually picked up my phone to cancel but stopped myself. Nerves? Fear? Whatever the reason, it was time to put on my big girl panties and face my fears. Just as I made the decision to move forward, I got a call from Harley. His car was in the shop.\n\n\"Would you like to reschedule?\"\n\n\"Actually, I was hoping you would pick me up. I have an opportunity to tour Purnell mansion and I'm really keen on going.\"\n\n\"Okay, sure.\"\n\nWe arranged for me to pick him up around six on campus.\n\nNana Jo listened nearby with her lips pursed.\n\nI couldn't take the silence anymore. \"What?\"\n\n\"Nothing.\"\n\nI refused to probe deeper and we worked in silence most of the day, ignoring the giant elephant in the room. Between Nana Jo's silence, a dream that wouldn't go away, first date insecurity, and the nagging question of whether or not Frank would call, I was a nervous wreck by noon. I had just decided to skip lunch when Frank arrived with a tray.\n\n\"I hope you two ladies haven't had lunch yet.\"\n\nWe acknowledged that we hadn't eaten.\n\n\"Great. I thought about flowers but decided food might be more practical.\"\n\nThe spread he brought looked delicious. There was clam chowder and chicken salad, two of my favorites, and a single rose. \"Hmm . . . clam chowder is my favorite. How did you know?\"\n\nHe smiled. \"You mentioned it last night. I had to get up early to get to the market to get the clams or I would have been by earlier.\"\n\n\"I can't believe you went to so much trouble.\"\n\n\"No trouble at all.\"\n\n\"But there are only two servings?\"\n\nHe laughed. \"How hungry are you?\"\n\nI smiled. \"Aren't you going to join us?\"\n\n\"I wish I could, but I've got to get back to the restaurant. Lunch is my busiest time and one of my cooks called out today.\" He looked disappointed. \"Rain check?\"\n\nI smiled. \"Definitely, and thank you.\"\n\nHe hurried off and Nana Jo and I ate in shifts. However, the arrival of the food helped to eliminate the tension between us.\n\nThe only event of note was a text message I received from Emma in the afternoon asking if I would be on campus anytime in the near future. I responded that I was going to be on campus by five thirty and arranged to meet her at the student union.\n\nThe rest of the afternoon we worked in a companionable silence. When it was time to leave, I gave Nana Jo a hug.\n\n\"What's that for?\"\n\n\"Because I love you and I appreciate your help and everything you do.\"\n\nShe squeezed me. \"I love you too and I'm proud of you, regardless of your taste in men.\"\n\n\"Why don't you like Harley?\"\n\nShe shook her head. \"I don't trust him. Something isn't right with him.\"\n\nI thought about that for a moment. \"I know. I feel it too, but then I'm not planning to marry him. We're just going to dinner and then touring the Purnell mansion.\"\n\n\"The Purnell mansion? You mean that mausoleum built by the House of David?\"\n\nI nodded. \"I'm not excited about it either, but Harley's writing a book about the House of David and that's where he wants to go.\"\n\n\"Hmm . . . what about what you want?\"\n\nI laughed. \"I thought you'd be glad I was actually going on a date.\"\n\n\"I am proud of you, but I also don't want to see you get hurt.\"\n\nI gave her another squeeze. \"Honestly, I don't care about him like that. I'm flattered, but . . . that's it. Besides, it's just one date. I'll be fine.\" I pulled my purse strap onto my shoulder. \"I better get out of here. I'll see you later.\"\n\nDriving my new SUV put a smile on my face. I loved the light coming through the sunroof, the satellite radio, and the gauge that told me how many miles until empty. Today, I was disappointed by how quickly the drive to MISU was from downtown. I parked away from other vehicles and walked to the student union with a joyful heart.\n\nInside, Emma and Zaq sat together in a booth. They were sharing an order of onion rings and laughing with their heads together. I hesitated for a moment, not wanting to interrupt the moment.\n\nEventually, Emma looked up and smiled. \"There you are.\"\n\nI sat down and declined the onion rings they generously offered to share.\n\n\"I didn't want to bother you, but Zaq said I should tell you about a couple of weird things that happened.\"\n\n\"Of course you aren't bothering me. You can talk to me anytime,\" I said with sincerity. I learned long ago not to get attached to my nephews' girlfriends. Just when I got to know them, they were gone, but I liked Emma. I hoped we could be friends, regardless of what happened between her and Zaq.\n\nShe smiled. \"Well, first someone broke into my dorm room.\"\n\n\"Are you okay? Was anything taken?\"\n\n\"I wasn't there and the only thing missing was my laptop, best I can figure. It happened on Sunday. Zaq and I went to the movies after the memorial.\"\n\n\"Did you call the police?\"\n\n\"Campus police. They filed a report but said I'd probably never see it again. Good thing I back up everything. Plus, I paid for insurance, so I got a replacement.\" She patted her new MacBook.\n\n\"That's strange, but it isn't really that unusual. I think thefts are common on college campuses.\"\n\n\"The weird thing isn't that the laptop was stolen. The weird thing is that it was returned.\"\n\n\"Returned? You mean the thief brought your laptop back?\"\n\n\"Not exactly. They tossed it in a dumpster. It was kind of insulting, really, like my laptop wasn't good enough for them or something.\"\n\nZaq smiled. \"I don't think that's it.\" He looked at me. \"I think they thought it was Melody's, but when they looked through it, they saw it wasn't.\"\n\n\"What makes you think that?\"\n\nZaq shrugged. \"They didn't take the television or the microwave or any of her jewelry. Plus, you guys had already packed up all of Melody's stuff, but whoever broke in, opened all her drawers and cut open the mattress.\"\n\n\"But only the one on Melody's side of the room,\" Emma added.\n\n\"Aunt Sammy, I think the burglar was looking for something.\"\n\nEmma's phone vibrated. \"That reminds me about the other thing.\" She held up her cell. \"I got another text from Melody's sister.\"\n\nI read the screen.\n\n\"I tried to forward, but it wouldn't let me. Zaq said she must have sent it so it couldn't be forwarded.\"\n\n\"Can someone do that?\" I asked.\n\n\"Depends on their e-mail system, but yes. There are systems that prevent forwarding,\" Zaq said.\n\nThe text said she thought whoever was trying to get in on Mel's scam was someone she had been having an affair with.\n\n\"I guess this means Detective Pitt is right. It must be Virgil.\"\n\n\"Didn't Cassidy know Virgil? I thought you mentioned that at the memorial,\" Emma said.\n\nI nodded. \"She did know Virgil.\"\n\n\"Plus, Virgil was already in on the scam, wasn't he?\" Zaq asked.\n\nI didn't have answers. This was odd. I told them what Virgil told us the other night at the hospital.\n\nI looked at my watch. \"I better go. I've got to pick up Harley . . . ah, Professor Quin.\"\n\nEmma looked surprised. \"Are you dating Professor Quin?\"\n\n\"I wouldn't call it dating. He's helping me with some stuff for a book, being British and everything. How was your lab Monday night?\" I asked.\n\n\"What lab?\" Emma looked puzzled.\n\n\"I thought you had a lab Monday night for Professor Quin's class.\"\n\nEmma shook her head. \"Nope, in fact he cancelled class on Monday.\"\n\nSomething in the look that passed between Zaq and Emma made me stop. \"Why? What's up?\"\n\n\"Nothing.\" Emma was a horrible liar. Her face turned red and she couldn't make eye contact.\n\n\"You can tell me. I'm not in love with the guy. He's cute, but . . . oh, I don't know. There's just something odd about him.\"\n\nEmma breathed a sigh of relief. \"I'm so glad you aren't serious about him. I think the guy is kind of creepy. He hits on his students, and there was a rumor he was having an affair with one of them.\" Emma paused before making up her mind. \"I think it was Melody.\"\n\n\"Do you have any proof?\"\n\n\"No.\"\n\n\"Accusing a professor of having an affair with a student is serious business. You wouldn't want to make an accusation like that without proof,\" I cautioned. \"But maybe I can ask him some questions tonight.\"\n\n\"Be careful, Aunt Sammy,\" Zaq said.\n\n\"I will. Don't worry.\"\nChapter 21\n\nI met Harley outside his office.\n\n\"Is this a new car?\"\n\nI smiled. \"Yes. I've only had it for two days.\"\n\n\"You should have gotten one of those new Land Rovers. They have tons more room in the back.\" He proceeded to put his bicycle into the back of my new SUV. I tried not to grimace at the sight of the mud which dropped from the tires or the scratches he'd gotten on the molding.\n\n\"There's a really lovely vegan restaurant down the road. Why don't we grab a bite before we go to the mansion?\" He tossed his backpack on the back seat and got in and fastened his seat belt.\n\nI shook off the desire to tip my hat like a chauffeur and got in the car. I followed his directions and pulled into the parking lot of a very expensive restaurant which I'd heard mixed reviews about. The d\u00e9cor was extremely high-end. The service was awful. The food was beautifully plated, but the taste was average. Harley talked a lot and seemed very excited.\n\nNear the end of the meal, he finally seemed to notice I hadn't said much. \"You're very quiet tonight. Is anything the matter?\"\n\nI shook my head. \"No. I'm fine.\"\n\nThe waiter brought the bill and Harley sat very still. I, too, sat still. After an awkward few minutes, he smiled and pulled out his wallet. \"I'm afraid I didn't bring any cash with me.\"\n\nI smiled. \"It says on the window they take credit cards. You do take credit cards, don't you?\" I asked the waiter.\n\nHe nodded.\n\nHarley's smile seemed forced, but he kept it plastered on. He looked back in his wallet and pulled out a Diner's Club card.\n\nThe waiter frowned. \"We take Visa, Master Card, Discover, and American Express. We don't take Diner's Club.\"\n\nHarley looked at me. \"I'm afraid that's the only card I have. Would you mind covering this one? The next meal is on me.\" He smiled.\n\nI wondered briefly what would happen if I claimed to have forgotten my wallet. However, the waiter loomed over my shoulder and I wasn't up for making a mad dash to the car. Instead, I pulled out my credit card and promised myself this would be the last meal Professor Harley Quin would ever receive from me.\n\n\"Thanks, love.\" He smiled.\n\nI stared back. I hadn't noticed before how crooked his teeth were.\n\nOnce the bill was taken care of, I drove to Purnell mansion. The mansion was over a hundred and ten years old and it looked every day of its age. I could imagine the building in its heyday was grand and beautiful, with a front porch that covered the entire front of the building, leaded glass windows, and ornately carved moldings. However, the paint had chipped away long ago. The floorboards of the porch sagged and there was evidence of termite damage around the outside.\n\nHarley got out of the car and grabbed his backpack from the back seat and hurried up the sidewalk. He was halfway up on the porch before he seemed to realize I wasn't behind him. He turned and looked at me. \"You coming?\"\n\nPerhaps it was too much to expect him to open my door, but I couldn't help comparing my experience with Frank Patterson. I don't need someone to open doors for me, but it sure felt nice when they did. I sighed and got out of the car.\n\nAn older gentleman with a long white beard and thick glasses waited for us on the porch. He said his name was Josiah Templeton.\n\n\"You that young fella that called?\" Josiah stared long and hard at Harley.\n\n\"Yes. I'm Harley Quin, and this is Mrs. Washington.\"\n\nI smiled and shook his hand. \"I'm pleased to meet you.\"\n\nHe dragged his gaze away from Harley. He looked frail and his skin was almost translucent, but he smiled and patted my hand. \"Don't get a chance to see many pretty women.\"\n\nI smiled. \"I'll bet you say that to all the women.\"\n\nHe laughed. \"Don't get much chance to anymore. Just a handful of us left these days.\" He kept patting my hand. \"I'll be a hundred on Christmas Day.\"\n\n\"You don't look it,\" I lied.\n\nHe stared at Harley again. \"You look familiar. Have we met before?\"\n\n\"I just have one of those faces.\" Harley's smile seemed strained. \"Well, we appreciate you allowing us to tour the mansion, but . . .\" He stared at Josiah with sympathy. \"I'm afraid this tour might be a bit much for you, old boy. Look, why don't you just give me the key and we'll wander around and then I can lock everything up when I'm done.\"\n\nMy eyes narrowed and I would have berated him for insensitivity, but Josiah said he didn't mind and handed over the key. He pointed at a small building across the street. \"I have a cottage over there to the right. Just drop the key in the mail slot.\"\n\nHarley promised to do so and hurriedly unlocked the door. \"You coming?\" He turned to me.\n\n\"I'll be there in a few minutes. I'm going to make sure Josiah makes it home safely.\"\n\n\"Fine.\" Harley hurried inside.\n\nI offered an arm to Josiah and, between me and his walking stick, he hoisted himself up.\n\n\"Thank you. If you just help me down to the bottom of the stairs, I'll be fine from there. These old joints need a little boost to get going, but once I'm moving, you just watch my steam.\"\n\nWe walked down the stairs slowly and I mentally cursed Harley for dragging this nice man out here just to tour an old house. At the bottom of the stairs, Josiah refused further assistance. I continued talking and made sure he made it safely to his cottage.\n\nOnce inside, he thanked me and I turned and made my way back to the mansion. I contemplated not entering, but I knew my defiant gesture would be wasted. Instead, I went inside.\n\n\"Hello? Harley, where are you?\" I yelled from the foyer.\n\n\"I'm down here.\"\n\nI followed the voice past the elaborately carved staircase, high ceilings, and tapestries to a door that lead downstairs to the cellar. I was surprised, but thankful, the old house still looked relatively sturdy, although the cobwebs and musty smell indicated it had been many years since the house had been opened and aired.\n\nIn the cellar, I looked around and tried to ignore the creepy feeling there were more than spiders crawling around down there.\n\nHarley was on his knees with a flashlight, studying the cinder block walls.\n\n\"What are you looking for down here?\"\n\nHe continued scanning the walls. \"Legend has it there were secret tunnels under this building.\"\n\n\"You mean the tunnels where Benjamin Purnell allegedly abused young girls and conducted satanic rituals and where the commune stored his body in a hermetically sealed glass coffin?\"\n\nGrowing up in North Harbor, these rumors were spread widely among North Harbor children, especially around Halloween.\n\nHarley continued his search. I couldn't see his face, but I could hear the glee in his voice. \"Tunnels full of buried treasure.\"\n\n\"Oh my God. You're a treasure hunter.\" I didn't even try to keep the scorn out of my voice. This guy was a nutcase. I made up my mind to leave him there when my cell phone rang. It was Nana Jo. I'd barely gotten a word out when she started.\n\n\"Sam, you've gotta get away from that guy. He's not what he claims to be. Frank had one of his friends at Scotland Yard investigate him, and he has a record. He was a grifter too. He lied about where he was from. There is no Deering Vale\u2014\"\n\nI never got to hear what else she was going to say because Harley snatched the phone out of my hand. \"Your grandmother has a big mouth.\"\n\nI stared as Harley Quin turned off my cell phone and put it in his pocket. \"Deering Vale . . . Oh my goodness. I can't believe I missed it. That's a fictitious town Agatha Christie made up for The Mysterious Harley Quin.\" I hit myself on the head with my palm. \"Harley Quin? Oh my God, I can't believe I missed that.\"\n\nHe smiled smugly and pulled a gun from his pocket. \"Now, what am I going to do with you?\"\n\nSomething inside told me insulting him was a bad idea, but I didn't listen. \"You cheap murdering lowlife scumbag.\"\n\nHe hauled off and struck me across the face. The blow was so hard it sent me flying into the wall. I hit my head on the doorjamb and fell to the ground. I must have been knocked out for some time because when I came to, there was no light coming through the small basement windows.\n\nI felt a kick in my side. \"You awake?\"\n\nI groaned.\n\nHe leaned his face down within inches of mine. \"Now, what am I going to do with you?\"\n\nI had a few ideas of what I wanted to do to him. He must have read my thoughts because he laughed. \"You're a feisty one, aren't you? Too bad you had to be so smart. We could have had fun together.\" He leered and ran his finger along my cheek.\n\nI swatted his hand away. If I'd had any saliva in my mouth, I would have spit in his face. Unfortunately, I think the tofu and black bean mush I'd eaten earlier had absorbed all the fluid in my body.\n\n\"Few people come down here anymore. It'll be a long time before anyone finds your body. You and Benjamin Purnell can rot down here together.\" He stood and pointed his gun at me. \"Goodbye, Samantha.\"\n\nI needed to keep him talking, buy myself some time. \"Why did you do it? Why did you kill Melody?\"\n\nHe smiled. \"She got greedy. She had a good con going with that oaf Dawson, but she didn't want to cut me in.\" He sneered.\n\nI wondered how I had ever thought him attractive. In this cold, damp dark basement, the only thing I felt when I looked at him was revulsion. \"So it was about money?\"\n\n\"It was always about the money.\"\n\n\"Maybe she really cared about Dawson.\"\n\nHe laughed. \"You are so naive. She didn't care two bits for that dumb jock. He was just a mark. She said he was going to be her meal ticket out of the life.\" He paced. \"I didn't care if she wanted to believe she could stop and go the straight and narrow, as long as she gave me my cut.\"\n\nI shivered in spite of myself at the cold tone of his voice. \"So you killed her. Just like that?\"\n\nHe nodded. \"Just like that.\" He raised his gun.\n\n\"What about A-squared?\" I rushed to get in before he killed me.\n\n\"He saw us together at the HOD. Followed us.\" He shrugged. \"The crazy old fool tried to blackmail me. Me?\" He laughed. \"Can you believe that? He saw me kill her in the parking lot at the HOD, and he thinks I'm going to pay him money not to tell the police?\" He shook his head in disbelief. \"Now, enough talk. I don't like loose ends and you're just another loose end.\" He pointed the gun at my head and stared.\n\nI refused to close my eyes. Instead, I stared defiantly at him and awaited my fate.\n\nJust then, I heard a thunderous sound as someone leapt down the stairs. Harley turned just as a huge shadow came barreling toward him and knocked him to the ground. I slid back against the wall and felt arms coming around.\n\n\"Sam, are you okay?\" Nana Jo asked.\n\nI leaned against her arms and rested my head. \"I'll be fine. Who's that?\" I pointed to the tousling shadows.\n\nJust then, Dawson pulled Harley up by his shirt and punched him in the face. Harley went limp and Dawson reared back and hit him again. Dawson's face was red with fury. Just as he was about to hit him again, Zaq and Frank Patterson grabbed his arm and held onto him.\n\nTears streamed down Dawson's face. \"He killed Melody and tried to kill my dad.\"\n\nFrank put his arms around Dawson and held on to him. \"I know, but it's over now.\"\n\nZaq came over to me. \"You okay, Aunt Sammy?\"\n\nI nodded. \"I'm fine now.\"\n\nSirens blared. Footsteps trampled overhead.\n\n\"We're down here!\" Nana Jo yelled.\nChapter 22\n\nThe EMTs patched up my head. They wanted me to go to the hospital, but I declined. Nana Jo insisted I ride home with Frank, but I refused to leave my new car.\n\nI looked at Dawson. \"How did you get here?\"\n\nHe nodded toward Zaq. \"My dad came to. He told me it was Harley. He was taking a leak behind a bush at the HOD and he saw him kill her. They were kissing in the back seat of his car and then he strangled her, got in the front seat and drove away. He must have dumped her body by the river where the police found her.\" He looked sad. \"He left her like a piece of trash by the side of the road.\" He took a deep breath. \"My dad tried to get him to pay to keep quiet and he tried to kill him.\"\n\nI hugged him. \"Dawson, I'm so glad your dad is okay.\" I stared at him. \"But, how did you get here?\"\n\n\"Zaq and Emma came by to see me and I got a ride back with him.\"\n\nI looked around. \"Where's Emma?\"\n\nHe smiled. \"Zaq made her stay at the bookstore.\"\n\n\"Would you permit me to drive you home?\" Frank asked.\n\nWe were outside and Zaq circled my new car. It was the first time he'd seen it. \"Wow. Nice car, Aunt Sammy.\"\n\nI smiled and handed Frank my key fob. He held the door for me and I got into the passenger seat. However, before he closed the door, I hopped out.\n\n\"What are you doing?\" he asked.\n\nI opened the back door and pulled Harley Quin's bicycle out of the back and tossed it to the ground. I brushed the caked mud out and slammed the door. Then I went back and got in and buckled my seat belt.\n\nFrank drove Nana Jo and me home. Dawson rode with Zaq.\n\nDetective Pitt came by the bookstore later to get my statement. We were upstairs in my loft. Snickers and Oreo must have sensed something was wrong. They hadn't left my side from the moment I got home. Christopher and Jenna had been assigned taxi service. Jenna was, according to her, ordered by Dorothy to get to the retirement village and pick them up. Christopher had picked up my mom and picked Jillian up from MISU when she asked.\n\nSurrounded by friends, family, and Detective Stinky Pitt, I gave my statement.\n\n\"He's been singing like a canary,\" Detective Pitt said. \"Doesn't want to be extradited back to England.\" He chuckled.\n\nJenna pulled out her tape recorder. \"So Virgil and Melody were planning to get Dawson to go to the pros so they could try and hustle money from him. Is that right?\"\n\nI nodded. \"I think Melody hoped to trap Dawson into marriage to strengthen her bond.\"\n\nDawson shook his head. \"My dad knew about that. He thought he could get money out of me too.\"\n\n\"But Dawson broke up with her,\" I said. \"Virgil said she was dating someone else.\"\n\nEmma chimed in, \"That was Professor Quin.\"\n\nNana Jo scoffed. \"Professor, my big toe.\"\n\n\"He was the other person in that special program Dorothy told us about,\" I said.\n\n\"So if he wasn't a professor . . . ?\" Emma asked.\n\nI pointed to Frank.\n\nFrank said, \"He was a grifter. I have a friend who used to be in British intelligence. I had him run his name.\" He avoided eye contact with me, and I thought I detected a small amount of color on his ears.\n\n\"So, he was a con man, too, and he and Melody ended up at the same university together. Convenient,\" Detective Pitt said.\n\n\"Well, there were only a few universities willing to take them. I think if you check around, you'll find Harley Quin was originally sent to another school. I think he must have been in contact with Melody, who told him pickings were good at MISU, so he came here. I think he heard the rumors about the House of David and created an identity for himself.\" I looked around. \"That's why Melody didn't bother about classes. She knew she would get a good grade from Harley and just needed to hang around long enough to get an athlete with PEP.\" I glanced at Nana Jo.\n\n\"But what happened to Professor Quin? Or is there a real Professor Quin?\" Emma asked.\n\n\"He made up the identity and lied to the university. You'd be surprised how few places take the time to check references.\"\n\n\"Good for us he used the alias before or I might not have found him,\" Frank said.\n\n\"Thanks to Irma, we learned that Virgil Russell knew Melody had another lover.\" I turned to her. \"She found that out at the memorial.\"\n\nIrma smiled broadly before breaking into a coughing fit.\n\n\"Everything came to a head at the memorial service Jillian arranged.\"\n\nJillian looked shocked. \"Me?\"\n\n\"If you hadn't gotten the memorial together, Quin wouldn't have found out that A-squared was still alive and in intensive care.\"\n\nShe smiled.\n\n\"But then he made another attempt on my dad's life,\" Dawson said.\n\n\"Yes, but that's how he trapped himself. If Stinky . . . ah . . . I mean Detective Pitt hadn't asked who I'd told about your dad being in the hospital, I might not have put it together. We were so focused on Virgil, but someone had to have put the note on his windshield.\"\n\n\"He could have faked the note.\" Detective Pitt looked condescendingly at me. \"Real detectives would have thought of that.\"\n\nNana Jo grunted. \"A real detective arrested the wrong man.\"\n\nI chose to ignore Detective Pitt. \"The note bothered me and it took a long time before I figured out why.\" I stared at Nana Jo.\n\nShe nodded. \"It bothered me too.\"\n\n\"It was the language. It told Virgil to go to the surgery.\"\n\nDetective Pitt stared.\n\n\"Americans would say hospital or doctor's office, not 'surgery.' \"\n\n\"That's it? That was what tipped you off?\" Detective Pitt looked skeptical.\n\nI nodded. \"Not at first. It just bothered me. But, thanks to Nana Jo for catching on to the Deering Vale reference.\"\n\nDetective Pitt looked confused. \"Deering Vale? What's Deering Vale?\"\n\n\"It's one of the fictitious towns Agatha Christie created. That's where Quin said he was from when Nana Jo asked.\"\n\nNana Jo smiled. \"Thought he was so smart that one. I knew I'd read that name before. So, I started rereading the Agatha Christie books until I found it. Darned fool.\"\n\nFrank shook his head. \"That was pretty stupid. He should know better than to use a name and a village in an Agatha Christie novel to women who own a mystery bookstore.\"\n\n\"Well, it is a bit obscure. If he'd used something more obvious, like St. Mary Mead, I'd have caught on immediately. Most people haven't even heard of the Harley Quin or Parker Payne short stories. They aren't as famous as her other sleuths.\"\n\n\"Except to someone who owns a mystery bookstore,\" my nephews said simultaneously.\n\n\"It rang a bell, but it took me a while to place it.\"\n\n\"Why did he steal Emma's laptop?\" Zaq asked.\n\n\"I can answer that,\" Detective Pitt said. \"He thought it would help him find out what you were up to.\" He nodded toward me. \"He thought she had notes.\"\n\nWe talked for hours after Detective Pitt left until I was so tired I could barely keep my eyes open.\n\nI woke up when I smelled bacon and coffee. Nana Jo came in to check on me. I suspected she'd been in several times during the night because whenever I woke up, my blankets were always neat and Oreo never woke me to go potty. I looked around and didn't see them.\n\n\"I had Dawson keep them so you could sleep in peace.\" Nana Jo opened the curtains. \"You feel up to breakfast?\"\n\n\"Definitely.\"\n\nI was stiff and sore and there was an ugly red-and-blue bruise on my forehead. Otherwise, I felt pretty good. Despite my good appetite and assurances I could work in the bookstore, Nana Jo would have none of it. She was going to keep things going at the bookstore, with a little help from my mom and the girls. The thought of Irma hitting on my male clients struck fear in my heart for a moment, but I supposed the store and the mystery reading men of North Harbor could survive one day with Irma.\n\nI'd tried to go back to sleep, but it was hopeless. Eventually, I gave up and looked for other ways to occupy my mind.\n\n\"Dis is frame. Is Frame. Jestem wrobiony.\"\n\nJ\u00f3zef Lipski paced and alternated proclamations of innocence in broken English and Polish. Neither James nor Victor spoke Polish, but they were able to comprehend the gist of the diplomat's rants.\n\n\"Mr. Lipski, we aren't accusing you of murder. However, we do need to ask you some questions,\" James said.\n\n\"Questions. Questions. Always questions wit de English.\" Lipski's accent was thicker when he was emotional and made it difficult for Victor and James to understand him.\n\n\"Did you tell anyone about your special cocoa?\" James asked.\n\n\"Of course. I talk about de cocoa. I tell dem Poland has best cocoa.\" He puffed out his chest with pride. \"Is true.\"\n\n\"I'm sure it is,\" Victor said quietly as he looked around the room.\n\n\"Did you show the cocoa to anyone?\" James tried again.\n\n\"Show it? I tell dem. I no show.\"\n\nJames rubbed the back of his neck. \"The police are going to need to test the cocoa.\"\n\nLipski halted and turned to James. \"Goot. Goot. Your police test.\" He handed the cocoa to James. \"Test prove I did not kill.\"\n\n\"Can you think of anyone who would want to harm you?\" Victor asked.\n\n\"Me?\" Lipski stared. \"You dink poison was for me?\"\n\n\"We don't know.\"\n\nLipski was silent for several seconds. He walked to his bed and lifted a corner of the mattress, reached under, and pulled out a note. He took the note to James. \"I give you dis.\"\n\nJames opened the note and read it. He looked up at Lipski. When he reread the note, he handed it to Victor.\n\nVictor read the note and then stared at James.\n\n\"When did you get this?\" James asked.\n\nLipski walked to the door and leaned down. \"It appear on floor.\" He pointed down. \"Day French woman shot.\"\n\n\"Meet me by the Marsh at three. W,\" James read aloud. \"Did you meet her?\n\n\"No.\" Lipski paced. \"I shoot wit de American.\" He stopped pacing and faced James and Victor. \"We leave de shooting. But de leg. It get stuck in de mud.\" He pulled on his leg. \"I pull and pull, but . . . de leg it not come out. She take de leg off. Only den am I able to pull it out of de mud.\"\n\nJames's lips twitched as he watched Lipski's demonstration.\n\n\"So, once you got her leg out of the mud, what did you do then? Did you go to the marsh?\"\n\nHe shook his head vigorously. \"No. I help de American to de house.\" He hopped on one leg. \"I help. I not go to marsh. I not meet anyone. Later, she is killed.\"\n\n\"Why didn't you tell anyone?\" Victor asked.\n\nLipski shrugged. \"She is dead. Dat is how I know is frame. Jestem wrobiony.\"\n\nVictor joined the Marsh Family in Lord William's bedroom.\n\n\"What took so long?\" Penelope asked. \"And where's James?\"\n\n\"We were on our way here when we got stopped by Thompkins. James was wanted on the telephone.\"\n\nJames and Detective Inspector Covington rushed into the room and closed the door.\n\n\"I'm sorry, I don't have much time. I've been called back to London. I hope I haven't overstepped, but I invited Detective Inspector Covington. I think it'll be fastest if we just include him.\"\n\n\"How did you get here so quickly?\" Lady Penelope asked.\n\n\"I called him after Brasseur died,\" James said.\n\nVictor smiled. \"What about the poachers?\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington grinned. \"I'm hot on their trail.\" Then he put his fingers to his lips and took a position near the window, where Daphne was seated.\n\nLady Elizabeth nodded. \"Of course, you're very welcome.\"\n\nThe detective smiled his thanks and quietly sat with a notepad on his lap.\n\n\"What's happened?\" Daphne stared at James.\n\n\"A German secretary, Ernst von Rath's, been assassinated in Paris.\"\n\n\"Good Lord. What's happening to the world?\" Lady Elizabeth whispered.\n\nJames paced. \"I'm afraid that's not all. A Polish teenager's been arrested for the murder.\"\n\nThe family looked shocked.\n\nLord William fumbled with his pipe. \"Here we are on the brink of war and now this.\"\n\nJames nodded. \"Exactly. And, somehow word has leaked out to The Week that an attempt was made on the Duchess of Windsor's life.\n\nDaphne looked pale. \"What's The Week?\"\n\nIt's an anti-fascist newsletter run by Claud Cockburn. The readership is small, but . . .\"\n\n\"But it could still cause trouble?\" she asked.\n\nJames nodded.\n\n\"So if word got out the French Ambassador was murdered by a Polish Emissary . . .\"\n\n\"It could be disastrous. I've got to run up to London. I'll be back as quick as I can.\" James hurried away, and the group sat in silence for a few moments.\n\nLady Elizabeth looked around. \"Well, we better get busy.\"\n\nThey filled Detective Inspector Covington in on what they had learned so far, including Victor's conversation with J\u00f3zef Lipski.\n\n\"So, Lipski couldn't possibly be responsible for the murder of the maid,\" Penelope said. \"If he was with Virginia Hall, then he has an alibi. Did anyone check with her?\"\n\nVictor nodded. \"Yes. As soon as we left Lipski, we questioned her. She confirmed everything he said.\"\n\n\"Do you trust her?\" Daphne asked.\n\n\"Yes. She was very credible. Both James and I agreed.\"\n\n\"He also couldn't have poisoned the cocoa,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\n\"Really? How can you be certain?\" Detective Inspector Covington asked.\n\n\"I talked to Mrs. Anderson.\"\n\n\"Who is Mrs. Anderson?\"\n\n\"Mrs. Anderson is the cook,\" Lady Elizabeth said. \"It took a bit of prodding to get her to admit it, but apparently, she was rather curious about this cocoa. She'd never had cocoa from Poland so . . . she made a couple of cups for herself and her daughter, Agnes.\"\n\n\"Well, I'll be,\" Lord William said.\n\n\"Yes. She said it tasted just like good old-fashioned English cocoa, and she and her daughter are perfectly fine.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington perched on the end of his seat. \"That's significant.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth nodded. \"I know. It means the poison wasn't in the cocoa.\"\n\nLord William stared. \"But how can that be? If the poison wasn't in the cocoa, how did the blasted fool get it?\"\n\n\"The poison has to have been put into his cup,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\n\"That's not the worst of it.\" Daphne looked around at her family.\n\nPenelope stopped pacing and stared at her sister. \"What do you mean?\"\n\n\"Unless you believe Thompkins or Mrs. Anderson put the poison in his cup, it had to have been put there by someone in the room.\"\n\nPenelope paled. \"You mean one of us.\"\n\n\"Exactly,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\nDetective Inspector Covington wrote furiously. \"You all are very good, very thorough.\"\n\nThere was a tentative knock on the door.\n\n\"Come in,\" Lady Elizabeth said.\n\nThompkins entered the room and closed the door. He moved to a corner and stood erect.\n\n\"Great, Thompkins, did you finish your assignment?\"\n\nThe butler coughed discreetly. \"Yes, m'lady.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth looked around the room. \"I asked Thompkins to come here and share the results from the search.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington looked confused. \"Excuse me, did you say search?\"\n\nLady Elizabeth nodded. \"Yes. We needed to find out if anyone had a gun, since none of the ones used in the murder belonged to us.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington stared at Lady Elizabeth with awe. \"Did you really? How did you get them to agree to a search?\"\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled. \"I didn't ask them.\"\n\nThompkins looked slightly uncomfortable but straightened his already straight back, pushed his shoulders backed, and lifted his head higher. \"As your ladyship instructed, I asked the maids, Flossie, Millie, and Gladys. The only one who remembered seeing a weapon of any type was Millie. She said Count Rudolph had a gun, but she hasn't seen it since. Under my supervision, they searched the room again, and there was no gun.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth sighed. \"That's what I was afraid of.\" She smiled at the butler. \"Well done, Thompkins. Please tell the staff I said thank you.\"\n\nThompkins nodded. \"Yes, m'lady.\" He paused for several moments.\n\n\"Is there anything else?\" Lady Elizabeth asked.\n\nThompkins coughed. \"There is just one other thing . . . I hesitate to bring it up, but you said you wanted to know about anything out of the ordinary.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth nodded. \"Of course.\"\n\nEveryone stared at the butler.\n\n\"Millie found this in the Duchess of Windsor's wastebasket.\" The butler held up a small piece of paper in the shape of a funnel. Everyone stared, but Detective Inspector Covington immediately hopped up and practically ran to the butler's side.\n\nThe detective grabbed the paper and stared at it and then whistled. \"I need to have this tested.\" He wrapped the funnel in a handkerchief and placed it in his pocket.\n\nThompkins nodded. \"I believe Her Grace is in the parlor with the rest of the guests.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth looked thoughtful.\n\n\"I know that look.\" Lord William sat up straight and stared at his wife. \"You've figured it out.\"\n\nEveryone stared at Lady Elizabeth. For several moments, she stared off into space. Eventually, she nodded and looked around and seemed to notice everyone was staring at her. \"I'm sorry. Did you say something, dear?\"\n\n\"You've figured out who the murderer is, haven't you?\" Penelope walked over to her aunt. \"Tell us.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth looked around at her family. \"Well, I believe I have.\"\n\nDetective Inspector Covington anxiously looked at her but stood very still.\n\n\"I'm afraid I've been terribly dense. I should have figured it out sooner. I believe Daphne commented on how 'theatrical' the murder seemed. I should have known then. Maybe that poor man wouldn't have died,\" Lady Elizabeth said softly. \"But, well, at least we can give him justice.\"\n\n\"Who did it?\" Detective Covington asked.\n\n\"Count Rudolph, of course. He used to be an actor before World War I. He even starred in some god-awful propaganda movie advocating the involuntary sterilization of the disabled and those with hereditary diseases.\" She shivered. \"He staged the murder. The setting, a British country home. The duchess, killed by the Polish ambassador.\"\n\nPenelope stared at her aunt. \"But the duchess wasn't killed.\"\n\n\"I think the count put the note in the duchess's pocket, sometime during the night when they were together. He wasn't to know she would have her maid wear her clothes.\"\n\n\"And Rebecca probably found the note in her pocket and thought the duchess wanted to meet her,\" Penelope said.\n\nVictor looked confused. \"But, J\u00f3zef Lipski has an iron-tight alibi. There's no way he could have killed her.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth nodded. \"But Count Rudolph wasn't to know about that. Virginia Hall is very casual about her wooden leg. She jokes and calls it Cuthbert, but I think she was embarrassed about getting it stuck in the mud. Neither she nor Lipski told anyone about the incident.\"\n\n\"But how did he kill her? Wouldn't he have been missed by the other members of his shooting party?\" Penelope asked.\n\nLord William reddened. \"Count Rudolph was with Georges Brasseur and Wallis. I suspect it would be pretty easy for a gentleman to . . . excuse himself for a few minutes and sneak off.\"\n\nDaphne stared at her uncle. \"Excuse himself?\"\n\nLord William squirmed uncomfortably.\n\nPenelope smiled. \"You mean to relieve himself?\"\n\nLord William's face reddened and he puffed on his pipe.\n\n\"But surely someone would have mentioned it,\" Daphne added.\n\n\"At the time it probably seemed normal. Later, after they'd had time to think about it, they might have suspected. That's probably why he killed Brasseur,\" Victor said.\n\nLady Elizabeth nodded. \"I suspect so.\"\n\n\"But surely the Duchess of Windsor would have said something,\" Daphne said.\n\nLady Elizabeth sighed. \"Perhaps, but the duchess may have found herself in an awkward situation. Remember, she had been seen coming out of his bedroom. She isn't exactly well loved by the British public at the moment. That type of negative publicity would have been the last thing she wanted.\"\n\n\"Where is he?\" Detective Inspector Covington asked.\n\n\"I believe Count Rudolph and the duchess are in the parlor,\" Thompkins said.\n\nDetective Inspector Covington got a constable and went to confront the count. Victor went along.\n\nAs the detectives entered the parlor, Count Rudolph glanced up at the approaching officers. A glimmer of realization flashed in his eyes and was quickly followed by panic. Before the detectives knew what was happening, Count Rudolph made a mad dash toward the door. He pushed the detectives aside and quickly closed the door behind him and turned the lock.\n\nWhen Detective Inspector Covington regained his feet, he pulled frantically at the doorknobs, but the heavy doors were locked.\n\nDetective Covington threw his body against the doors in an effort to force them open, but the sturdy oak doors didn't budge.\n\nVictor looked around for a way out. He glanced at the French doors. \"Quickly, the window.\"\n\nThey quickly unlatched the windows and rushed out.\n\nOutside, they split up. Detective Covington and Victor ran in one direction and the constable ran in the other.\n\nAround the back of the house, Victor spotted Count Rudolph making a run for the garage. \"There. He's going for the garage.\"\n\nThe footmen, Jim and Frank, were carrying a large basket of laundry outside for Gladys, who followed close behind.\n\n\"Stop him!\" Victor yelled.\n\nThe footmen looked where Victor pointed and dropped the basket and took off after the count.\n\nFrank caught up to Count Rudolph seconds before Jim. When they were mere feet from their target, both men took their stance, knees bent, feet about shoulder width apart, back straight, and heads up. In a few quick steps, they closed the gap between them and the count. They lowered their shoulders and wrapped both arms around him and took him to the ground, just as they had been taught to tackle ball carriers on the rugby field.\n\nCount Rudolph struggled briefly but quickly recognized the futility of his situation. Detective Covington arrived and relieved the footmen of their prey. \"Well done!\"\n\nFrank and Jim looked at Victor, who nodded further approval.\n\nThe Duchess of Windsor was so upset when told by Lady Elizabeth of Count Rudolph's actions, she immediately left and returned to Fort Belvedere; poor plumbing notwithstanding.\n\nJ\u00f3zef Lipski received a telegram recalling him to Poland. The assassination of the German ambassador and fear of escalating violence were cited as the reasons for his return. Lipski thanked the Marsh family profusely before leaving.\n\nLord and Lady Chitterly made discreet departures.\n\nFordham Baker was one of the last to leave.\n\nLady Elizabeth waited in the hall to say goodbye.\n\n\"Thank you so much for the wonderful hospitality,\" Fordham Baker said to Lady Elizabeth as he pre pared to depart.\n\nLady Elizabeth smiled. \"And thanks are due to you, too, I think.\"\n\nHe blinked and looked at Lady Elizabeth with surprise. \"To me, your ladyship? I don't know what you mean?\"\n\n\"I think you do.\" She smiled. \"I think you were not as . . . indisposed as you pretended to be. I also think you are the one responsible for feeding information to Claud Cockburn.\"\n\nHe blinked. \"I don't know . . .\" He chuckled. \"What gave me away?\"\n\n\"You were quite convincing.\" Lady Elizabeth smiled. \"But we were very concerned about your health. So, I had my butler substitute the scotch with a diluted mixture. Your reaction was the same to both.\"\n\n\"I should have guessed.\" He laughed. \"I take back all the evil thoughts I had about the quality of your cellars.\" He laughed until he had to wipe tears from his eyes. \"I find people are very reticent to speak freely in front of a newspaper editor unless he's in a drunken stupor. Then you would be surprised what they will say.\"\n\nLady Elizabeth bid him farewell.\n\nVirginia Hall looked for Lady Daphne before she left. She found her in the library, sitting on the window seat.\n\nDaphne looked up at her. \"Are you leaving? Well, it's been a pleasure meeting you,\" she said politely.\n\nVirginia Hall smiled. \"You British ladies are such well-bred liars. You haven't enjoyed meeting me at all.\"\n\nDaphne looked shocked. \"I don't know what you mean.\"\n\n\"Don't get your back up, dear. It's not your fault, and I don't blame you one little bit.\" She sat down on the window seat next to Daphne. \"I blame that handsome man of yours.\"\n\nDaphne's face heated and she looked down. \"I don't know what you mean.\"\n\n\"Yes, you do. Lord James FitzAndrew Browning.\" Virginia looked around the room. \"I told James he needed to come clean and explain everything to you, but he wouldn't do it.\"\n\nDaphne stood up abruptly. \"I don't know what you're talking about, but I don't think I want to hear it.\" She turned and took several steps away.\n\n\"There's nothing going on between James and me,\" Virginia said.\n\nDaphne stopped. \"What?\"\n\nVirginia got up and walked over to Daphne. \"Look. He should have told you himself, but he just kept saying you should trust him.\" She huffed. \"Men. They're impossible.\" She pulled a small card out of her purse and showed it to Daphne. \"I work for the American Secret Service. I was sent here to keep an eye on J\u00f3zef Lipski. The president believed the Germans might be up to some funny business and looks like he was right.\"\n\n\"You're a spy?\" Daphne asked.\n\nVirginia Hall nodded. \"Pretty good cover, right? Who'd believe a one legged woman could be a spy?\" She patted her leg.\n\n\"Is that real?\" She pointed to the leg.\n\n\"Yes. Cuthbert's real alright.\" She pulled up her skirt so Daphne could see the buckle. She put away her identification card and stared at Daphne. \"He really does care about you.\"\n\nDaphne shook her head. \"If he did, why didn't he tell me the truth?\"\n\n\"Because I was a fool,\" James said from the doorway.\n\nDaphne turned at the sound of his voice.\n\nVirginia Hall gave her a hug and whispered, \"I think you and I could be great friends. I hope so.\"\n\nDaphne squeezed her back and whispered, \"Thank you.\"\n\nVirginia nodded to James as she left.\n\nDaphne returned to her seat, and James walked over and stood next to her.\n\n\"I'm terribly sorry, darling. I should have told you the truth from the beginning.\"\n\n\"No, I'm sorry. I was just . . . jealous.\" She laughed. \"It's a new emotion for me. I don't think I've ever been jealous of anyone before.\"\n\nJames held her hand. \"You don't have any reason to be. You have my heart totally and completely.\" He looked down. \"I love you.\"\n\n\"I love you too,\" Daphne whispered.\n\nJames pulled Daphne toward him and kissed her passionately and thoroughly. Daphne couldn't have said whether they kissed for seconds or hours.\n\nWhen they finally pulled apart, James held her close and whispered, \"Darling, I plan to make an official request for your hand, but I have one favor to ask of you.\"\n\nDaphne snuggled next to him like a kitten. \"Anything.\"\n\n\"I would like to introduce you to my mother.\"\n\nDaphne smiled. \"I would like nothing better.\"\n\nLady Daphne had no idea how she would regret that remark.\n\n\"Hmmm. Maybe foreshadowing is a bit much here,\" I said aloud, even though there was no one to hear.\n\nI better leave that part out. I deleted the last sentence and read the last few lines.\n\n\"I would like to introduce you to my mother.\"   \nDaphne smiled. \"I would like nothing better.\"\n\nTHE END\n\nChapter 23\n\nThe Sleuthing Seniors Book Club met on Thursdays. That was the only reason I came downstairs. The bruise on my forehead was now a deep purple and it looked like I was getting a black eye. However, after a day alone, I was tired of my own company.\n\nDawson had been busy baking most of the day. Tomorrow, he would be allowed back at school and back on the football team. One of my favorite desserts was carrot cake, so he'd made a delicious carrot cake with cream cheese icing. It was moist and tasty and I ate more than I should, but I enjoyed every bite.\n\n\"Have you ladies decided on your next book?\" I asked.\n\n\"We're going for Raymond Chandler's The Big Sleep,\" Dorothy said.\n\n\"That's a good one,\" Nana Jo added.\n\n\"Is there sex in it?\" Irma asked.\n\nI thought back. \"It's been a while since I read it, but I don't think so.\"\n\nIrma looked disappointed.\n\n\"I've got something for you.\" I went to the back office and came back with three books which I placed in front of Irma. \"I ordered these for you.\"\n\nShe looked at them. They were romance novels by Brenda Jackson.\n\n\"A Brother's Honor is the first book in the series. A Man's Promise is the second, and A Lover's Vow is the third. Technically, they're romances, not mysteries, but there is definitely a mystery subplot. I thought you might enjoy them.\"\n\nIrma coughed and gave me a hug. \"Thank you, Sam. I can't wait to read them.\"\n\nFrank Patterson entered with a bottle of champagne, followed by Dawson, who had a tray of glasses. Nana Jo came over to me with a sly smile on her face and a mysterious envelope in her hand. \"Sam, I have a surprise for you.\"\n\nI looked at Nana Jo and tried to imagine what the surprise might be. I looked around at the girls, and they seemed to be a mixture of happiness and nervous anxiety.\n\nNana Jo took a deep breath. \"We know how . . . deeply private you are about your book and your writing. We all think it's wonderful.\"\n\nI could feel the heat rush to my face. It had been difficult to allow the girls to read my book, but they were all very complimentary. However, they were my friends and I knew they would never say or do anything to hurt me.\n\nDorothy said, \"Josephine, stop beating around the bush and tell the girl.\"\n\nI looked from Dorothy to Nana Jo. \"Tell me what?\"\n\nNana Jo hesitated for a moment. \"You know Ruby Mae has a second cousin whose daughter is a literary agent in New York.\"\n\nI suddenly felt a huge weight in the pit of my stomach. \"Yes.\"\n\n\"Well, we sent her a copy of your manuscript, and she loved it.\"\n\n\"You did what?\" My head was dizzy and I felt like I needed to puke.\n\nNana Jo looked shocked. \"We . . . I wanted to help.\"\n\nI put my head between my knees for several moments. The room was completely quiet.\n\nWhen I finally felt I could sit up without getting sick, I did. Tears streamed down my face.\n\nNana Jo hurried to my seat. \"I'm so sorry, Sam.\" She put her arms around me to comfort me. \"I never would have done it if I'd known it would upset you this much.\"\n\nI pulled away from her and stood. \"Upset?\" I stared at Nana Jo.\n\nHer expression was one of disappointment and remorse. I looked around at the girls and each of them looked ashamed.\n\nI took several deep breaths and collected myself. Then I threw both arms around my grandmother. \"Thank you.\"\n\nNana Jo pushed me away to look in my face. Seeing I was okay, she pulled me close and hugged me tightly.\n\nIrma took a swig from her flask. \"Jesus Christ, you scared the living daylights out of me.\"\n\nDorothy and Ruby Mae came over and hugged me. Frank popped the cork and poured champagne into glasses.\n\n\"I'm just in shock. I'm sorry. I just can't believe it.\" I stared at the letter Nana Jo handed me.\n\n\"You'd better believe it.\" Nana Jo smiled at Sam. \"I have one more surprise for you.\"\n\n\"I don't know if I can take any more.\"\n\n\"I decided how I want to spend my share of the casino winnings.\" She pulled an envelope out of her back pocket and handed it to me.\n\nI opened the envelope. Inside were brochures and flyers for a trip to England. I looked at my grandmother with tears in my eyes. \"Really?\"\n\n\"I thought it would help with your research . . . for your next book.\"\n\nI was dumbstruck. Tears streamed down my face. I grabbed Nana Jo and squeezed her. \"Thank you.\"\n\n\"You deserve it.\" Nana Jo wiped away a tear and took a drink from the glass of champagne Dawson handed her. \"Now, let's get this party started.\"\nPlease turn the page for an exciting sneak peek of  \nthe next Mystery Bookshop Mystery\n\nTHE NOVEL ART OF MURDER\n\ncoming soon wherever print and e-books are sold!\n\nChapter 1\n\n\"What the blazes do you mean I didn't get the part?\" Nana Jo's face turned beet red and she leapt up from her chair.\n\nI had never been so happy for a slow morning crowd at the bookstore as I was at that minute. My grandmother was about to blow a gasket, and while it might prove entertaining, I preferred keeping the drama contained to family and friends.\n\n\"Josephine, calm down.\" Dorothy Clark was one of my grandmother's oldest friends, which was probably why she was nominated to break the bad news to her.\n\n\"Don't tell me to calm down. I am calm. I'm always calm.\" Nana Jo pounded the table with her hand. The mugs shook and splashed coffee on the table. \"If I want to kick up a ruckus, I'll kick up a ruckus.\" She pounded the table again and then marched over to the counter and grabbed a dishcloth to wipe up the mess.\n\nRuby Mae Stevenson, another of Nana Jo's friends, shook her head and moved her knitting out of the way of the spills. \"I told you she wouldn't take it well.\"\n\n\"I've had the lead role in the Shady Acres Senior Follies for the past ten years. That role was created specifically for me. I don't just play the part of Eudora Hooper, retired schoolmarm dreaming about becoming a famous showgirl. I am Eudora Hooper.\" Nana Jo wiped up the spilled coffee.\n\n\"I know, and you've played the role splendidly.\" Dorothy's face reflected her sincerity.\n\nAmazingly, Dorothy didn't seem to be humoring my grandmother. Nana Jo's performance was inspired, and each year she got better and better.\n\nNana Jo looked at her three closest friends. \"Who got the part?\"\n\nRuby Mae put her head down and refused to make eye contact.\n\nIrma Starczewski reached for her mug, but it was empty, so she pulled a flask out of her purse and took a swig.\n\nNana Jo put her hands on her hips, narrowed her eyes, and stared at Dorothy.\n\nFor a large woman, almost six feet tall, Dorothy shrank as she stared at Nana Jo. \"Maria Romanov.\"\n\nI thought Nana Jo was red before, but the beet red coloring from earlier was nothing compared to the purple red that crept up her neck.\n\n\"Maria Romanov? That two-bit hack's only acting talent is in her ability to convince people she's a decent human being.\" Nana Jo pounded the table again, rattling the mugs.\n\nJust as quickly as the anger flared up, it vanished. Nana Jo flopped down in a chair. Nearly as tall as Dorothy, Nana Jo went through a transformation. Instead of the vibrant, active, five-foot-ten, sharpshooting, aikido-tossing woman I knew and loved, there was a seventy-something, old woman in her place.\n\nShe took a few deep breaths. \"If that's what Horace wants, then I guess I wasn't as good as I thought I was.\"\n\n\"Bull\u2014\"\n\n\"Irma!\" we shouted.\n\nIrma coughed and clamped her hand over her mouth. Years of heavy smoking, drinking, and hanging out with truckers, if Nana Jo was to be believed, had left her with a deep cough, a salacious sexual appetite, and a colorful vocabulary.\n\nI leaned over and gave Nana Jo a hug. \"Your performance was amazing and I'm not just saying that because you're my grandmother.\"\n\nShe absentmindedly patted my arm. \"Thank you, Sam, but Horace Evans is a top-notch director. He once directed Ethel Merman.\"\n\n\"He even won a Tony award. I've seen it. He keeps it in his bedroom.\" Irma smiled and then broke out in a fit of coughing.\n\nThe fact that Nana Jo didn't acknowledge Irma's quip about the location of the award was an indication of her state of mind. \"We've been fortunate to have someone with his experience and credentials at Shady Acres.\"\n\n\"Really? I didn't know he had a Tony award. They always run something about the Senior Follies in the newspaper, but they've never mentioned it.\"\n\n\"He likes to keep it low-key.\" Dorothy nodded. \"He worked on Broadway for more than twenty years.\"\n\n\"How in the world did he end up in Michigan?\" I asked.\n\n\"He wanted to be close to his family.\" Ruby Mae looked up from her knitting. \"I think his son was an engineer for one of the car companies.\"\n\nNorth Harbor used to have a lot of manufacturing plants that supplied parts for the Detroit automobile industry, but when the economy went south in the seventies, so, too, did most of the manufacturing jobs.\n\n\"I appreciate the kind words, but Horace is an expert. If he thinks Maria Romanov will make a better Eudora Hooper than me, I'll just have to accept his decision.\"\n\nWe tried to cheer Nana Jo up, but nothing we said had any effect. She smiled and continued to shrink. Only once did she perk up and demonstrate the flash of fire which characterized her personality.\n\nThe door chimed and a customer entered the bookstore.\n\nNana Jo rose from her seat. \"It's time to face the music. On opening night, I hope you all break a leg.\" She pushed her chair in and headed to the front of the store. \"And I hope Maria Romanov breaks her neck.\"\n","meta":{"redpajama_set_name":"RedPajamaBook"}}
+{"text":"\nThere's a lot more to traveling with a horse than shoving him onto and yanking him off of a trailer. Indeed, if you've ever seen a horse man-handled onto a trailer, you've witnessed an approach so much more forceful than it needs to be \u2014 and so much less effective than it should be \u2014 that you may have decided that traveling with your horse simply isn't an option. If you can't ride Old Paint from your home barn to where you want to go, you're just not going.\n\nOr, you might have decided that you never want to own a trailer, load your own horse, or go to a show or to a state park for a trail ride on your own; instead, you'll call a horse-transport company and let _them_ load, transport, and unload your horse. The problem with that, of course, is that although the professionals may be quite adept at transporting your horse, they still have to do it, and you have to pay them for their services.\n\nIt's unfortunate that so many horse owners think in such clear-cut terms when it comes to trailering, because virtually _any_ horse can be trailered safely by his owner if the owner simply attends to a few details, the most critical being teaching the horse how to load.\n\nIn this text you'll learn the loading method taught by the late Dr. Edwin Goodwin, long-time equine professor at the University of Maryland. It's a good method because it works, almost without fail. It works quickly on willing green horses; it works fairly quickly on older horses that have always been led; it works a bit more slowly on horses that have had negative loading and\/or trailering experiences; and it can help your horse overcome fear, stubbornness, bad training, bad handling, bad nature, and bad horsemanship, at least insofar as loading is concerned.\n\n# Trailer-Training  \nYour Horse\n\nLaura Harrison McBride\n\n## CONTENTS\n\n**On the Road Again**\n\n**Travel Stress, Equine Style**\n\n**The \"Cue-On\" Loading Technique**\n\n**How to Cue-On Load**\n\n**Points to Remember**\n\n**Hauling Options**\n\n**Safety First**\n\n**Travel Equipment and Supplies**\n\n**Seasonal Strategies**\n\n**Documentation**\n\n**Rules for the Road**\n\n**When You Reach Your Destination**\n\n## On the Road Again\n\nIn today's highly mobile society, it's conceivable that in a single journey \u2014 especially as equestrian competitions continue to expand internationally \u2014 a horse will board a road vehicle, a railroad car, and an airplane. If the venue is particularly remote, boat travel may also be added to the mix. Still, despite our unmatched ability to transport our horses, often we don't give their journey a second thought, even though their safety and comfort during travel should always be a priority.\n\nThe mortality once associated with horse transport \u2014 the sort that occurred with unfortunate regularity when the New World was populated with European stock \u2014 is no longer an issue, the lower rates reflecting increasingly sophisticated techniques for managing travel stress. Good feed and management practices keep a horse in prime condition so that any losses of weight or muscle tone during transport are relatively inconsequential. In addition, vaccinations guard against germs a horse may encounter, and the design of trailers and protective equipment (such as leg wraps) gets better each year. Though sickness or injury can certainly add to a horse's level of stress during travel, it's not the main issue. Allaying a horse's fears of loading and unloading through proper training, and minimizing environmental stressors, should be our greatest concern, as these have the most significant impact on the horse's stress level and condition during and after transport.\n\n## Travel Stress, Equine Style\n\nStudies using heart rate as an indicator of stress show that a horse's heart rate is significantly elevated while he is being loaded onto a trailer. Studies also reveal that the steeper the grade of the loading ramp, the greater the horse's stress. There are several possible explanations for this reaction:\n\n  A horse instinctively fears dark, enclosed spaces \u2014 precisely the characteristics of the vast majority of trailers and vans.\n\n  Steep ramps are often covered with hemp matting that can slip. They also tend to be narrow, often only as wide as the horse, so the handler cannot enter with the horse. Uncertain footing and an absent handler increase the horse's anxiety.\n\n  A horse that has had a bad experience loading\/unloading or during a trip associates this negative experience with all similar situations and equipment.\n\n  A horse that has never been taught how to load properly and that is forcefully manhandled onto a trailer prior to a trip has negative expectations of travel.\n\nOnce a horse has been successfully loaded, environmental stressors associated with travel continue throughout the trip. The van may be too hot or too cold; the road may be rough or the driver inexperienced or careless; the hay might run out or the horse's neighbor may snap at him when he reaches for a wisp; the floor might be too hard or too slick; and the horse may simply wonder what's happening. In addition, he may not be accustomed to standing still for two hours or six hours or twelve hours. Each of these factors individually, and certainly any of them in combination, results in stress. The less stress a horse experiences during travel, the better.\n\n## The \"Cue-On\" Loading Technique\n\nDr. Goodwin is credited by many with inventing the cue-on loading technique, and he was certainly an early proponent in the United States. The basic technique, however, is nearly as old as horse transport and can be found in various guises in equine instruction books of antiquity. Dr. Goodwin spent more than thirty years teaching it to 4-H'ers, college equine science students, and private clients. And he taught it to me, his final graduate assistant.\n\n### _What You Need_\n\nIn the cue-on method, you use your voice, your body, and a cue to teach your horse to respond positively when you ask him to load onto a trailer. You'll use your knowledge of the process to condition your horse to do what you ask, when you ask. Be observant, heed your horse's body language, and be positive. Even the most willing, docile horse will think twice about strolling up a ramp into a dark little hole, never mind stepping up into one. When your horse agrees to do what you ask \u2014 which, in this case, goes against his instincts \u2014 he demonstrates infinite trust in you.\n\nPatience is key. Plan to invest time and to control emotion when teaching cue-on loading. Decide how much of the process you wish to accomplish successfully at each training session, and always try to end on a positive note. For an older horse that has come to believe that loading is a horrible thing, limit the number of cues you ask him to accept at each session. If your horse is a bad loader, having him approach the trailer on cue in a straight line may be enough work for one session; having him approach the ramp on cue might be enough for the next. Never give up at the horse's insistence, no matter how frustrated you or he may be. You are in charge, not your horse. Only stop working on your own terms.\n\nTo reiterate, break up the method into manageable parts that your horse can accomplish successfully at each session, be patient, and soon he will load willingly.\n\n### _The Horse's Motivation_\n\nThe cue-on method involves reward but not a food reward and not letting the horse off the hook when he has only partially mastered the goals you've set for the particular session. It is more cause-and-effect than carrot-and-stick or even perform-and-reward: simply put, you cue your horse to move forward and he does so to avoid repetition of the cue.\n\n### _Simple Tools_\n\nMany of Dr. Goodwin's students were self-proclaimed \"animal nuts,\" some of whom had limited equine experience. Of these, some objected to the simple tools \u2014 a lead rope with chain and a dressage whip \u2014 that Dr. Goodwin used to teach horses to load. The naysayers assumed that such tools were inhumane, not realizing that what would be severe for a housecat is gentle for a horse. In the cue-on method, cues are given with nothing more stringent than a three-inch bit of string, and this is done mainly to demand the horse's attention. It's also used to establish dominance.\n\n_The cue-on technique requires simple tools: a halter, a lead shank or a lead rope with chain, and a dressage whip_.\n\n**When to Seek Help**\n\nIf your horse strikes or kicks at any point during the training process, seek out the services of an experienced professional trainer for some good basic training for your horse and help with loading.\n\n## How to Cue-On Load\n\nThe cue-on loading technique is highly effective and humane. You might think that this exercise should be done in a fairly enclosed area, to keep the horse's attention, but that's not the case. It is far better to work in an open area where you cannot buy false cooperation from the horse and where he feels that he has an out and can flee if he really wants to. Giving him this sense of freedom will help put your horse at ease and help you gain his trust.\n\n_Equipment_\n\nLong lead rope with chain\n\nDressage whip\n\nTrailer, preferably a ramp type (a step-up trailer is slightly more difficult for the horse and may require an extra session or two of work)\n\n### _Getting Started_\n\nOne objective of a good training program is to establish a predictable routine that will put the horse at ease and help to reinforce the lessons learned. Before beginning each training session, take time to groom your horse. A thorough grooming will relax him and make him more receptive to the lesson that follows.\n\n_Grooming him before the training session begins establishes an enjoyable pre-lesson routine for your horse_.\n\n### _Walking and Halting on Cue_\n\nTo train your horse to load on cue, you must first teach him to walk and halt on cue. This may be the entire lesson for the first day, depending on the age of your horse, his attention span, and his prior loading experiences. Here's how.\n\n**1**. Pass the chain over the horse's nose, and hold him on the near side with the long lead rope. Pass the lead rope in front of your body and hold it in your left hand, just as you would when leading your horse; hold the dressage whip in your right hand.\n\n**2**. Say \"Walk,\" and simultaneously tap the horse on the hindquarters with the whip. If your horse doesn't move, give the command again and tap him on the hindquarters a bit more forcefully. When giving physical cues, always err on the side of too little force rather than too much. If the horse doesn't respond, repeat the command using slightly more force behind the cue. When he begins to walk, praise him warmly as you walk at his shoulder. An encouraging, enthusiastic \"Good\" is enough. Remember not to tug; simply walk beside him as he responds to the cue. _Note_ : When giving the Walk cue, be sure to tap your horse only on the hindquarters. If he feels the whip on his legs, he may kick.\n\n_Say \"Walk,\" and tap the horse on the hindquarters with the whip while walking beside him_.\n\n**3**. After walking several paces with your horse, bring him to a halt with the command \"Whoa\"and a fairly sharp tug on the lead. Don't pull so hard that the horse tosses his head in the air from pain or backs up to resist; instead, tug just enough to elicit the desired response. Praise him for halting.\n\n**4**. Repeat this sequence several times to reinforce the cues. Common wisdom suggests that a horse learns something after two repetitions, yet each horse is different. Observe your horse for increasing confidence or for signs of boredom; both are signals that the horse is ready for the next stage.\n\nAs your horse learns the cues, you will be able to tap less insistently and tug less forcefully. Eventually, a single tap or even the verbal cue alone may be enough. Conversely, if your horse is reluctant, you will need to increase the authority of the aids until you get the response you've requested. Once a positive response is received, back off by using a gentler request.\n\nAs your horse learns what each cue means and begins to respond consistently, gradually cut back and eventually eliminate the verbal praise. By doing so, the association between the cue and response becomes automatic: when you ask for the walk, your horse gives the walk; when you ask for the halt, he halts. If you were to continue rewarding your horse with the same level of praise after he responds to each cue, the praise would come to hold little meaning for him, and you would have difficulty providing positive reinforcement during the next phase of the maneuver, whatever it might be. When you are certain your horse knows the cues Walk and Whoa, it is time to approach the trailer.\n\n**Leading onto a Trailer?**\n\nYour horse is making progress. He now willingly walks and halts on the lead in response to a minor cue. So, you might wonder, why not just lead him onto the trailer? Won't that work every time?\n\nYes and no. If you choose to lead your horse onto a trailer, it will involve some degree of pulling on your part, and your horse might choose to resist, backing up and setting up the first failure to load, which would likely be followed by others. In addition, if you're in front of the horse, particularly if you are busy tugging and trying to hold him near the cross-ties or tie ring until someone snaps up the butt bar, you may have a difficult time getting out of the trailer.\n\n### _Loading onto a Ramp Trailer_\n\nPark your trailer on level ground, preferably grass or dirt, and choose to work at a time of day when the interior of the trailer is at its brightest. As mentioned earlier, horses are naturally wary of dark, enclosed spaces, so the brighter the trailer's interior the better. Before you begin, be sure the trailer is solidly parked and doesn't sway or tip. A trailer that isn't stable will undermine your horse's confidence.\n\nIt's useful to have a helper nearby for this lesson, particularly if your horse refuses to walk straight up the ramp (see page 10), but if you are a good horseman, have boundless patience, and know your horse well, a helper isn't absolutely necessary. You'll want to pay close attention to your horse's body language during this exercise, so you'll know if and when he might choose to resist or strike out.\n\nWhen training your horse to load, always end on a positive note within the horse's comfort zone, and reward him with lavish verbal praise. Training your horse to load will take at least two sessions of work and probably more.\n\n**1**. Groom your horse to relax him and make him receptive to today's lesson.\n\n**2**. Reinforce walking and halting on cue by revisiting steps 1\u20133 on pages 7\u20138.\n\n**3**. After your horse responds successfully to the Walk and Halt cues, give the Walk command and approach the ramp calmly and purposefully. Don't lead him to the ramp; instead, walk _with_ him, holding the lead rope as you cue him to walk forward by voice and a tap of the whip, if needed. Depending on the configuration of the trailer, you may have to lengthen the lead to let him walk forward alone into his space on the trailer. But that, too, is the beauty of this technique. Because he's responding to your cue to walk forward and isn't being led, this will be an easy transition.\n\n**4**. When the horse reaches the ramp, he will probably balk, walk forward at an angle, stop, or back up. _If he balks_ , gently nudge him back into position facing the ramp, and then tap his hindquarters with the dressage whip to cue him to walk forward. _If he walks forward at an angle_ , attempting to step off the side of the ramp, position a helper with a second dressage whip on the far side of the ramp. Back the horse, and ask him to approach again. Work together with your helper, alternately tapping the horse's hindquarters if necessary. This should keep him moving straight ahead. _If he stops_ , tap his hindquarters with the dres-sage whip and cue him again to walk forward. _If he backs up_ , back him until he stops. Then stand for a brief while, let him relax, and cue him again to walk forward. If he insists on backing \u2014 some horses have learned this technique to evade loading \u2014 swat his hindquarters with the whip, using sufficient force to compel him to walk forward. _Note_ : Horses don't like to back up very far and typically use the maneuver as a last-ditch evasion; choosing between backing into the sting of a whip and going forward is really no choice at all, and your horse will quickly comply.\n\n**5**. It may take five, six, or even more attempts for your horse to walk onto the ramp and into the trailer. (Some horses may even need to revisit an earlier step in the process before proceeding. This is to be expected.) Once he is in, praise him warmly and touch him lightly on the hindquarters, which cues him to move forward and away from the unsecured butt bar. If he cannot go forward any farther, he will take the cue to mean, \"Don't move back.\" You will have walked into the trailer with the horse as far as you are able, depending on the trailer configuration and the number of occupants.\n\n_Once he is loaded, touch your horse lightly on the hindquarters_.\n\n**6**. Once inside the trailer, the horse should appear fairly relaxed and be willing to stand still until you cue him to back out. Secure the butt bar and then the cross-ties. Remove the lead chain from the horse's halter.\n\n**Reminder**\n\nA horse that loads badly will eventually be put through far more trauma than you might inflict with a well-timed, well-intentioned swat of the whip during training.Your goal is to make your horse understand that he must walk up the ramp and onto the trailer at your cue. He also must learn that evading, by backing up or moving sideways, has unpleasant consequences.\n\n### _Backing Out of a Ramp Trailer_\n\nOnce the horse has loaded successfully onto the trailer, and you've praised him and secured the butt bar and cross-ties, let him stand quietly for a few minutes. Then prepare to back him out of the trailer. Enlist the help of an assistant.\n\n**1**. Unfasten the cross-ties, and reattach the lead chain to the horse's halter.\n\n**2**. Have your helper unlatch the butt bar and then stand at the side of the ramp, where the horse will back off.\n\n**3**. With your hand, touch your horse's flank gently, even with just the tips of your fingers. This is a \"guiding\" touch to help guide him back, keep him straight, and maintain his trust, rather than the stronger, more positive \"stop\" touch used earlier. Say \"Back,\" and praise him when he has come completely off the trailer and is standing quietly, awaiting further instructions.\n\n### _How Long Does It Take?_\n\nYou may think that this whole process will involve only two sessions of work for you and your extremely talented horse \u2014 one for walking and halting on cue and one for loading on cue. Anything is possible, but such swift success is likely only if your horse is a trusting, willing pupil, hasn't had previous negative experiences (loading _or_ training), and you have the right attitude and sufficient persistence to work patiently through each step until he performs it correctly.\n\nMost horses require more than two sessions to learn to load properly. Because a horse's attention span is fairly short, consider breaking down the training process into manageable mini-sessions such as this:\n\n  **Session 1** : Walk and halt on cue\n\n  **Session 2+** : Walk up to the ramp on cue (as many times as needed to instill confidence in your horse)\n\n  **Session 3+** : Walk up the ramp and into the trailer on cue (as many times as needed to instill confidence in your horse)\n\nPay special attention to your horse's body language during each session, never push him beyond his comfort level, and always end on a positive note. The horse may get halfway up the ramp, back off quickly, then turn sideways. In such a case, straighten him out and repeat the loading cue. If the horse is slightly more successful on the next attempt \u2014 say he pokes his head into the trailer before backing out, for example \u2014 repeat the loading cue and stop him at the place where he is still comfortable. Praise him with an enthusiastic \"Good boy,\"then quit for the day. Don't give food treats, as you'll be out of luck one day if you need to load your horse and don't have any food rewards handy.Verbal praise works best, and a pat or stroke is also appropriate.\n\nWhen resuming training, repeat what was done successfully during the previous session.Your horse's confidence and comfort level should improve with repetition during each session.\n\n### _Loading onto a Step-Up Trailer_\n\nBecause a step-up trailer is far more challenging for the horse to negotiate, both physically and mentally, than a ramp trailer, I recommend training horses to load onto a ramp trailer first, if possible. When your horse is confident and comfortable loading onto a ramp trailer, he'll be more willing and able to negotiate a foot-high step and walk into a step-up trailer. The training process for both trailer types is more or less the same, but, generally, training a horse to load onto a step-up trailer takes at least twice as long as training to load onto a ramp trailer, mainly because the horse may be thoroughly intimidated by the step. The basic training objectives are as follows:\n\n>   Cue the horse to walk forward.\n> \n>   Cue the horse to walk forward to the trailer.\n> \n>   Cue the horse to walk forward and into the trailer.\n> \n>   Praise horse warmly and touch him lightly on the flank.\n> \n>   Secure butt bar, then cross-ties.\n> \n>   Remove the lead chain from the horse's halter.\n\nIf you must begin training with a step-up trailer, be _absolutely_ certain that your horse will walk forward on cue, no matter what. Then introduce him to the trailer.\n\nEnlist the aid of two assistants to help you guide the horse on and off the trailer, but be certain both are horsepeople and thoroughly familiar with how quickly a horse can back away and wheel around. Instruct the helpers to remain alert, safe, and move out of harm's way if necessary.\n\n**1**. Because on a step-up trailer there is no ramp to define how far right or left the horse can move, position one helper on either side of the trailer to define the path you want the horse to take. In effect, the helpers create a human wall or chute for the horse's progress.\n\n**2**. Cue the horse to walk forward. Encourage your helpers to reach out and gently direct him onto the trailer.\n\n**3**. When the horse reaches the trailer, he may automatically step up in obedience to your cue to walk forward. More likely, though, he will stop. _Never_ lift a horse's front leg and place it on the trailer in an attempt to have him continue forward; this is a dangerous practice and will only confuse the horse. Instead, back him, walk away from the trailer, reinforce the Walk cue, and approach the trailer again.\n\n**4**. If you get tired after a few refusals and backings, instruct one of the assistants to restart the process for you.\n\n**5**. When the horse is successfully loaded, secure the butt bar, then the cross-ties. Remove the lead chain from the horse's halter.\n\n### _Backing Out of a Step-Up Trailer_\n\n_Once your horse is comfortable and confident, he will step up and walk right into the trailer at your urging, without help from assistants_.\n\nIf your horse loaded successfully onto a step-up trailer, next he must learn to back and step down. Because horses don't like to back, let alone back and step down blindly, this lesson can be quite stressful for the horse.\n\nYou'll begin as you would for backing from a ramp trailer, this time enlisting the aid of two helpers. As you did for loading, position your helpers on either side of the trailer to form a human chute. Take your position next to the horse as soon as possible, turning yourself so you face the trailer's exit.\n\n**1**. Unfasten the cross-ties, and attach the lead chain to the horse's halter.\n\n**2**. Have a helper unlatch the butt bar and then stand at the side of the trailer, where the horse will back off. Have the other helper stand on the opposite side.\n\n**3**. Position yourself at the horse's shoulder, give the Back command, and instruct the helpers to guide the horse back with encouraging words and a gentle touch on the hindquarters. Do not use reward words (e.g., \"Good boy,\"\"Good horse,\"etc.) until the horse is safely off the trailer.\n\n**4**. When the horse has backed and stepped down successfully, give lots of verbal praise and physical rewards, such as pats and neck rubs.\n\n**Good Footing**\n\nBecause it is difficult for a horse to exit from a step-up trailer, good footing is extremely important. Always park a step-up trailer on grass or dirt, not pavement. Horses respond best to soft, familiar surfaces when unloading, especially early on. If a horse puts his hind feet down on a slick, hard surface, he might scramble, hurting himself, a handler, or a bystander. When your horse is comfortable loading and unloading, it may be safe to unload on hard surfaces, but if you have a choice park on grass or dirt. (Note: A ramp trailer should also be parked on grass or dirt, especially at first, but this is not quite so critical as it is with a step-up trailer.)\n\n## Points to Remember\n\nCue-on loading is a straightforward training method, but lest you be overly optimistic, keep these points in mind.\n\n  **You must be patient**. Everyone who trains a horse in the cue-on loading technique knows that it's not a source of instant gratification. Learned successfully, however, it leads to a lifetime of good loading for your horse.\n\n  **It's not a quick fix**. Don't expect a so-called bad loader to learn cue-on loading in a day because you want to go to a show; and don't expect a good lead-on loader or a green-but-not-ruined horse to learn it in a day, either. Train your horse for loading as intensively as you would train him for any other essential skill _before_ you travel together.\n\n  **Always give the verbal command and physical cue simultaneously**. This allows your horse to associate the command with the desired response. If you were to give the physical cue before the verbal command, the horse might wonder why he's being hit and become agitated.\n\n  **Reward only the desired behavior**. During the training process, be careful not to talk nicely to or pet your horse when he becomes upset and does not do what you want. Such gestures of consolation only confuse the horse, causing him to think that he is being rewarded for not cooperating. Instead, use a firm, low tone, and don't yell. Think of this as your \"command\" voice. Repeat your cues insistently and calmly until your horse complies, no matter how upset he may seem to be. When he's performed the desired behavior, then you can reward him with verbal and physical praise.\n\n  **When loading, always fasten butt bar** _**before**_ **the cross-ties**.If the horse is cross-tied before the butt bar is up, he could back up quickly, break the cross-ties, and injure himself or a handler.\n\n  **When unloading your horse, always unfasten the cross-ties** _**before**_ **the butt bar**. If your horse is tied and the butt bar is down and something startles or frightens him, he may pull back, ripping the tie ring out of the trailer wall and injuring himself or you.\n\n  **Practice**. When you are fairly confident that your horse knows how to load and unload, practice with him several more times. Repetition reinforces learning. After reinforcing the skill, you can give it a rest until you're ready to load, particularly if you're traveling fairly soon, say within a week or two. If there are long time lags between trips, revisit the skill every few months, until the horse has been successfully loaded and hauled several times, at which point you'll be absolutely sure that knows what to do.\n\n  **Keep your dressage whip handy**. Always keep your dressage whip with you when traveling, particularly for the first few road trips with your horse, just in case an old fear or doubt should get the better of him. If, for reasons beyond your control, your horse has a bad loading experience or a bad trip after learning the cue-on loading method, you may need to do a short refresher course.\n\n## Hauling Options\n\nWhatever type of rig you choose and however many horses it can carry, the rig should be tall enough and wide enough to allow each horse to move his head about freely to maintain balance. If partitioned, each stall in the rig should be wide enough and long enough for the horse to move a step forward or backward and to shift his weight from side to side somewhat. If you can squeeze past your horse once he's loaded in the rig, the stall is probably a good size.\n\n### _Horse Vans_\n\nA British horse van, or permanent horse transport, might more aptly be described as a \"horse box\"\u2014 in short, a stall in which horses can move about with considerable freedom, as if at home. Studies have shown that most horses experience minimal stress when traveling this way. They are free to position themselves forward, backward, or sideways, as they wish and as the van's motion dictates, thereby minimizing discomfort and cramping. Horses can fall in a horse van if the ride is bad, but careful, predictable driving and good road conditions minimize its likelihood.\n\nThough horse vans generally offer a smooth, stable ride, their side ramps are typically steep. Horse vans are most commonly used in professional hauling, often for racehorses. At the racetrack, the ramp is extended, not from the truck's deck to the ground (which can be as much as three feet away) but to an earthen off-loading ramp that provides a gentle descent to the ground. Without that useful intermediary structure for loading and unloading, the ramp must be covered with a non-slip material, such as a hemp mat, to provide adequate traction so the horses can negotiate the ramp safely. Be sure the mat is fastened securely at top and bottom to provide solid footing. In the event of mechanical problems, horses must be off-loaded and then reloaded onto a replacement vehicle, which can be a major inconvenience.\n\n### _Horse Trailers_\n\nTrailers range in style from light all-aluminum carriers to heavy steel and plywood models, with a wide assortment of models in between.Your finances, tow vehicle, and horse should all be carefully considered before making a purchase. Determine how much you can reasonably spend, and then research what's most appropriate. The trailer's hitching device and configuration are also important considerations.\n\nAmong detachable trailers that require a separate towing vehicle, the basic choice is between a gooseneck and a bumper hitch, also called a _tagalong_. Each hitch type is available for various trailer styles, which you should consider carefully when choosing a trailer to suit your traveling needs. One advantage of a detachable rig is that if the towing vehicle has problems, the trailer can easily be reattached to a replacement vehicle, with no unloading of horses required.\n\n### _Hitch Types_\n\n_Gooseneck hitches_ are permanently mounted on the bed of a pickup with a large bracket. Goosenecks offer an excellent turning radius and are more stable on the road than bumper hitches. They are more expensive, however, and, pound for pound, require a heavier, more expensive towing vehicle than do bumper hitches.\n\ngooseneck hitch\n\nThe _bumper hitch_ attaches to a bumper or frame-mounted receiver on the towing vehicle. If the engine is strong enough and the tow vehicle's frame is sturdy and made of steel, pickup trucks, larger sports utility vehicles (SUVs), and even \"land yacht\" types of cars, such as old full-size Cadillacs, can haul trailers with bumper hitches. (If hauling by car, a oneor two-horse trailer is the largest size you'd want to risk. Confirm your vehicle's towing capacity with a mechanic.)\n\nbumper hitch\n\n### _Trailer Style_\n\nOnce you've selected a hitch type, you must consider what trailer style will be most appropriate for you and your horse. Any trailer type can be outfitted with a ramp or a step up.\n\n**Straight-load trailer**. A traditional trailer, the straight-load is available in several sizes and can accommodate from one to four horses, possibly even five. Horses generally enter side-by-side and face forward. A four-horse straight-load may place two pair of horses, one in front of the other, or in an extremely large trailer may place two horses facing the rear and two horses facing forward, with a single aisle between each pair from which the horses load and unload. If need be \u2014 and only if the flooring is sufficient and your tow vehicle is able to pull the extra weight \u2014 a pony can be hauled facing sideways in the aisle space.\n\n**Two-horse front-load trailer**. In the two-horse front-load, a variation of the straight-load, horses load from the front and stand facing _away_ from the direction of travel. The horses load through small ramps, on either side of the center line, that are angled to accommodate the tow bar and the tow vehicle. These trailers aren't common, but studies have shown that horses experience less stress when hauled facing away from the direction of travel, so it might be worthwhile searching for one, particularly if your horse doesn't travel well. _Warning: Never_ back horses into a straight-load trailer. The load distribution is not designed for rear-facing horses, nor are the ties and other equipment. Serious and needless injury could result.\n\n**Slant-load trailer**. In the slant-load, horses are loaded from the rear but stand at an angle, about 60 degrees off center, with their heads facing toward the left side of the rig. A metal partition or bar defines the space for each traveler. Although they may offer enough head room, slant-load trailers are often too narrow for warmbloods and large Thoroughbreds, unless the partitions are adjustable and can be rearranged to accommodate two larger horses in a space that might normally carry three Arabians or Quarter Horses, for example. Some slant-load trailers offer rear-facing travel (that is, 60 degrees off center, with the head facing toward the rear rather than toward the tow vehicle), but they are rare and difficult to find. Slant-loads usually have a high step up, as much as a foot from grade, in order to maintain the structural integrity required to carry so much weight in a relatively short trailer.\n\nslant-load trailer\n\n**Stock trailer**. In the United States, some people use stock trailers, originally intended to haul cattle, to approximate the \"loose-box\"\u2013style trailering of the British horse van.Though this is fine for shorter horses, such as Arabians and old-style Quarter Horses and ponies, a Thoroughbred, Saddlebred, racing-style Quarter Horse, or warmblood will not have sufficient headroom and, therefore, won't be able to maintain proper balance. If the tall horse cannot balance properly, he may fall down, resulting in serious injury. Also, if the horse is scared and flips his head up, even while wearing a head bumper (that is, a poll protector or guard), he may die.\n\nStock trailers offer good ventilation, the open-slat areas providing excellent air circulation. Some horsemen who use stock trailers partially cover the openings with Plexiglas to reduce drafts and to prevent rain from entering. Others fit the trailers with partitions. Some load as many as three horses side-by-side in a front row, then install a partition and load another row of three behind. Typically, horses in a stock trailer lean on each other without much protection, so it is especially important to wrap legs and use head bumpers.\n\nTrailers for two or four horses that have no permanent partitions are sometimes used in a similar manner when hauling a single horse. This approach can work quite well. The horse can then decide where he feels best balanced, and he probably won't upset the balance of the trailer when he adjusts his position. He also can stretch his legs and neck. The drawback is that a sudden stop could cause more serious injury to a loose horse than to one tied and held in place by leads, partitions, and a butt bar. Most typically, two horses are hauled in a two-horse trailer, three or four horses are hauled in a four-horse trailer, and so on, eliminating loose-box travel entirely.\n\n**Manger-style trailer**. In a manger-style trailer, the area in front of the horse's head is boxed as storage space.That may be nice if the trailer lacks a dressing room for storage, but it will restrict the horse's ability to stretch his head down and drain his sinuses, contributing to travel stress. If you have long trips planned, a walk-through or Thoroughbred-style trailer will be a better option for your horse, even though you'll have to store items in your vehicle. (If you're hauling with a car or an SUV and you need to carry lots of hay with you, you can mount a hayrack on the roof of the trailer. And by all means, cover the hay with a tarp if bad weather is predicted.)\n\n## Safety First\n\n_Before_ you buy, have a mechanic inspect the trailer, especially if it's used, to confirm that all mechanical and electrical parts are in good working order. Also, check the tire condition; tires are easily replaced if worn, so don't reject a trailer solely because of its tires. Then check, or enlist the help of a knowledgeable horseman to check, the trailer's structural integrity. The floor should be solid, not warped, damp, rusty, or soft. The ramp hinges should be in good working order, not corroded or sprung. The walls should be sturdy enough to withstand hoof impact. If you prefer a thin-walled trailer but have a big horse that kicks, hang stall mats on the walls for added insurance.\n\nBefore you haul or have your horse hauled by others, always check the tires for adequate inflation and good tread. Then do a through visual inspection of the trailer's interior. Make sure there are no nails, loose wood, bent metal parts, or other protrusions that might pierce your horse. Make sure everything is loaded securely, not loose or precariously positioned, as falling and rolling objects might frighten or injure your horse. Check the hay nets; they must be securely fastened in a place accessible to the horse. Check any side half-doors or drop-down windows to be sure they will stay closed during travel. Finally, be certain that when loaded, the horse and all his parts, including his head, will remain inside the trailer at all times during travel.\n\n## Travel Equipment and Supplies\n\nNo matter what type of trailer you choose or must use when traveling, preparing your horse for the trip and packing needed supplies can help make the trip as comfortable and as stress-free as possible for your horse.\n\n### _Protective Gear_\n\nWhenever your horse travels, he should be protected from bumps and cuts due to jostling and unexpected jolts in the trailer.\n\n  **Halter**. When trailering, _always_ use a leather or breakaway halter that has a nylon body and leather crownpiece. If your horse gets himself twisted, he will be able to struggle and break free of the halter.\n\n  **Lead rope with chain**. Use a lead rope with a chain to load the horse. When your horse has learned cue-on loading, you no longer need the lead, but because your horse became accustomed to it during the training process, continue with what he knows. Tie with cross-ties, then remove the chain. If the trailer isn't equipped with cross-ties, switch to a lead without a chain for tying.\n\n  **Head bumper**. A head bumper is a good idea, particularly for tall horses being transported in short trailers. Avoid hauling in a trailer not designed for your type of horse, and always take needed precautions. Horses generally don't rear in trailers, but they might fling their heads in the air or jump a little if they are frightened. Head bumpers are designed to protect the head and are made of either dense felt or foam covered with leather or leatherlike man-made material. The head bumper attaches to the halter.\n\nhead bumper\n\n  **Quilts and bandages**. If you have sufficient time and are able to apply them properly \u2014 that is, not so tight that they bow tendons nor so loose that they come off and entangle your horse's feet \u2014 you can use quilts and standing bandages to protect your horse's lower legs during travel. Applying quilts (or fleece or the newer no-bow, fleece-covered, foam-filled leg wraps) and bandages can be time-consuming, so if you choose this option apply them early on the day of the trip. (If you're new to bandaging, it may take 30 minutes or more for you to complete the job. Have an experienced person check that the bandages aren't too tight when you're done.) If the horse stands quietly, an experienced bandager can do the job in as little as five to ten minutes.\n\n  **Shipping boots**. For spur-of-the-moment trips or if your horse is being transported by someone who is not a proficient bandager, shipping boots are a good alternative. Typically, shipping boots, which reach from just below the horse's knee to the top of the hoof, incorporate a bell-boot section that protects the coronet band. (If you use wraps and standing bandages, begin with a bell boot, applying it before you begin to wrap, so the horse won't damage the hoof wall or coronet band if he scrambles.) If you plan to use shipping boots, put them on your horse and lead him around the property a few times to get him used to how they feel _before_ you ship.\n\n**1**. Wrap the quilt around the leg, keeping it low and fairly snug. Secure.\n\n**2**. Beginning in the middle, wrap the bandage in the same direction as you did the quilt. Leave some of the quilt visible.\n\n**3**. Wrap back upward, applying a fair amount of pressure. Finish at the top, and secure with tape.\n\n**4**. Wrapping the quilt and bandage low on the leg provides added protection.\n\n_Shipping boots feel strange to a horse. Get your horse accustomed to them_ before _you travel_.\n\n### _Other Provisions_\n\nIt goes without saying that when traveling you must load all of your horse's standard equipment and anything extra you think you might need at his destination or for the event in which you are participating. Here are a few essentials that I never travel without:\n\n  **Water**. Horses are often quite particular about their water, so stow some five-gallon jugs of their regular water, just in case. Adding Kool-Aid to strange water is said to make it palatable for horses, so you may want to bring some of that along as well. At home, an adult horse can drink 10 to 20 gallons of water per day. Generally, horses drink less during travel, but a minimum of 10 gallons per day per horse should be enough.\n\n  **Hay and feed**. Never change your horse's hay or feed immediately before or after a trip. If you are traveling to a new barn, bring along some of his regular hay and grain \u2014 enough for several days. Use his standard ration for the first day or two, then mix it gradually with what his new home offers. Changing food gradually in this way minimizes your horse's gastric distress. Before, during, and after travel, be sure your horse has good-quality hay to keep his gut active, something partially helped by daily exercise when he's not traveling.\n\n  **Hay nets**. For trips that take longer than an hour, and particularly if you're headed to a horse show where the horse may stand in or be tied to the trailer for most of the day, be sure you load hay nets to capacity, so he can nibble to pass the time and keep his gut active.\n\n  **Fly sheets, coolers, and sweat sheets**. These can be useful extras, particularly if you're traveling out of your immediate area.\n\n  **Treats**. Always have a generous supply of your horse's favorite treats available.\n\n### _Creature Comforts_\n\nWhen your horse can load successfully and you've packed all needed equipment, you've got about 90 percent of the trailering battle won, at least as far as your horse is concerned. But there are a few other considerations that deserve your attention, which may greatly improve your horse's comfort during travel.\n\n  **Ensure adequate ventilation**. Adequate ventilation protects against excessive stress during transport. Stuffy enclosed areas, such as a poorly ventilated trailer, not only contribute to your horse's physical stress, they also encourage the spread of airborne pathogens and can increase the risk for developing respiratory illness. If you must use different trailers, familiarize yourself with them before you travel, and consult their owners for advice regarding the best window\/vent arrangements.\n\nWhen making adjustments to a trailer's ventilation, angle the vents in such a way that the incoming air doesn't blow directly on your horse. One of the best ways to determine airflow is to adjust the vents, hop in the trailer (with no horses loaded), and have someone tow it around the farm property so you can feel for yourself how much air is entering and where the air travels. In addition, observe your horse after a few local trips. Has his mane blown to the opposite side? Is he trying to huddle against one side or other of the trailer?\n\n  **Allow sufficient slack in the lead**. Unless you must tie the horse's head close to the trailer wall \u2014 because he is next to a fighting horse, for example \u2014 don't run the lead short. When tied, your horse should be able to drop his head enough to allow for proper drainage of the sinuses, which helps to prevent buildup of harmful microorganisms and dust. If your horse can drop his head to the point of a grazing posture when tied, the lead is too long and must be shortened. A long lead is dangerous for the horse at all times when traveling, but especially during a sudden, unexpected stop.\n\n  **Provide sufficient bedding**. My very tall horse (16.3 hands high) lifts his tail and lets fly about five minutes down the road. I've always assumed that the trailer's motion relaxes him because he is a good traveler, but such ready defecation might just as easily be an expression of nerves. Whichever the case, be sure to provide sufficient bedding for your horse and monitor your horse's bodily functions closely during travel. Some horses simply refuse to urinate in a trailer; others urinate a lot. Both can be problematic for different reasons. Be vigilant during your first few road trips, carefully assessing your horse's condition before and after travel. If you suspect your horse is losing condition, even on short trips, consult your veterinarian for possible solutions.\n\n  **Try a special browband**. On a hot day, you might want to install a wettable visor on your horse's browband to keep him cool. Or, you might try a magnetic browband, which some equine massage therapists and acupuncturists swear by as effective tools for relaxing horses. It is believed that the magnetic field produced by the browband alters the way certain molecules important to cell function act within the brain, thereby stimulating the production of calming hormones such as melatonin. For best results, a magnetic browband should be applied at least an hour before travel.\n\n## Seasonal Strategies\n\nOn a trip of any length, plan to check the horses at least every three hours to be sure that they have hay and have not gotten untied or entangled in a fallen hay net. If you know that a trip will take longer than six hours, plan ahead and research a safe place to unload the horses to let them graze and stretch their necks for 15 to 20 minutes.\n\n**Summer travel**. In summer months, adequate ventilation is relatively easy to achieve. Just leave the windows and any top closure above a rear-facing ramp open. And keep the rig moving. Carry five-gallon containers of your horse's usual water, and offer it each time you stop, preferably in a familiar bucket. How many jugs you'll need depends on your horse's drinking habits, so observe them carefully before a trip, and load water accordingly.\n\nIf you stop to eat and refuel, try to park in the shade, open the tops of hay doors if you have them, and make your stop as short as possible.\n\n**Winter travel**. In winter, many people are inclined to keep a trailer or van tightly closed in an effort to make it warm and cozy for their horse. This is a mistake, because if your trailer is closed tightly you simply cannot provide your horse with adequate ventilation and he will be too warm. Dr. Goodwin was fond of telling his students that horses lived outside successfully, in all sorts of weather, for fifty-five million years without any help from humans, and he'd just as soon have seen all horses living outside virtually all of the time, unless they were sick or injured. And even then outdoor living had its benefits. So don't coddle your horse.\n\nIf you see condensation forming on the windows, you can be sure that the trailer or van is too hot and damp, and the horses are uncomfortable. By not providing adequate ventilation, you inadvertently create an environment that does more harm than good.\n\n**Tip for Winter Blanketing**\n\nIn winter, be careful not to blanket your horse too heavily during transport. Blanket your horse appropriately for his clipped or un-clipped state and the day's temperature. Then before loading your horse, physically stand in the trailer wearing proper attire for the weather outside. If you are slightly uncomfortable \u2014 perhaps a bit chilly \u2014 in the trailer or van, it's probably just the right temperature for your horse. If you're comfortable or warm, it's probably too warm for your horse and you should adjust the vents to allow in more air. Remember, he is always wearing a fur coat.\n\n## Documentation\n\nThere's nothing more unnerving than not having the papers you need when you need them most. When traveling with your horse, make it a point to bundle up these documents, just in case. Keeping all of your important papers in a flexible file is a good idea.\n\n  **Negative Coggins test**. When traveling with your horse, make sure that you or the hauling company (if your horse is being shipped professionally) has a current negative Coggins test on hand for your horse. The Coggins test determines whether the horse is a carrier of equine infectious anemia; a negative test indicates that the horse is not a carrier and poses no risk of spreading the disease.\n\n  **Current health certificate**. Some states require a current health certificate in addition to a negative Coggins, so check with the Department of Agriculture in your state before you cross state lines.\n\n**The Threat of Shipping Fever**\n\nThe incidence of strangles, or \"shipping fever\"\u2014 a highly contagious infectious disease caused by _Streptococcus equi_ that occurs most commonly in horses transported long distances (more than 500 miles in one trip) \u2014 has diminished greatly in the last quarter century. The decline clearly has much to do with vaccines and other preventive strategies, such as improved feed and disinfecting trailers after each trip.\n\nCharacterized by high temperature (103\u02da\u2013104\u02daF), nasal discharge, cough, difficulty swallowing, and swollen lymph glands that may abscess and burst, strangles is principally spread by direct contact with nasal secretions or pus draining from an abscess. Interestingly, _S. equi_ is found in just about every stool sample taken from horses, whether or not the horses show signs of disease. Stress, which negatively affects the immune system, may be all that is necessary to allow the incubating bacterium to take hold, successfully combating the horse's weakened immune system to cause obvious signs of disease. A lengthy, stressful road trip may increase your horse's susceptibility to _S. equi_. Treatment includes penicillin and excellent care, specifically clean water and feed, a dry stall, good sanitation, and peace and quiet.\n\n  **Insurance papers**. When hauling long distances, especially, you may want to bring your insurance papers \u2014 for horse and vehicle \u2014 along for the ride.\n\n  **Contact information and contingency plans**. In case of an emergency, particularly if you become injured or incapacitated during the trip or at a show, it's a good idea to carry with you contact information and contingency plans so people will know whom to contact and what to do.\n\n  **Recovery information**. If your horse had been tattooed or has had a chip implanted to prevent theft and to facilitate recovery efforts, you may wish to carry that information along with you, specifically the identification number itself and any documentation your veterinarian provided.\n\n  **Records and registration**. If you are going to a show and need proof of the horse's prior performance or size (pony papers, for example) or breeding (registration for a breed show), stow copies of that information, too.\n\n## Rules for the Road\n\nIn some states, a commercial driver's license is required if you plan to haul anything larger than a two-horse trailer. Check with your state's registry of motor vehicles before planning a cross-country trip with Sir Speedo. And always observe these simple rules of the road when hauling.\n\n  **Don't exceed your rig's hauling capacity**. Know what it is and the weight of all horses to be loaded _before_ you travel.\n\n  **Check tire pressure for adequate inflation**. Do this the day before you travel in case you must repair or replace tires.\n\n  **Load properly**. If you are loading one horse into a two-horse trailer, load him on the left so his weight is over the crown of the road, rather than on the lower shoulder at the edge of the road. If you're loading two horses, put the larger one on the left, again to keep the greatest weight toward the road's crown rather than toward its sloping shoulder. In the event of poorly maintained road surfaces or the need for defensive driving maneuvers, this may help to prevent a rollover.\n\n  **Drive well**. Remember that you're hauling precious cargo that's standing in the trailer behind you. Drive carefully, being considerate of your horse and other drivers. Make no jackrabbit starts or stops. As a general rule, leave at least one car-length in front of you for each ten miles of speed you are traveling. With a trailer adding pushing weight from behind, that's the minimum allowable distance you must maintain if you wish to make a good, safe stop, and even then a stop on demand will likely toss the horses a bit.\n\nWhen turning, slow down, and be sure you have sufficient room to make a wide turn. It's a good idea to practice turning and other basic maneuvers with an empty trailer _before_ hauling horses.\n\nWhen you're driving on the highway, realize that a semi that passes you will produce enough drag on your truck and rig to challenge your driving skills. Be prepared to compensate for such buffeting by skillful handling. Always keep two hands on the wheel.\n\n  **Monitor mirrors**. Large mirrors are essential for both sides of the towing vehicle. They allow you to see beyond the towing vehicle to the trailer itself and should be monitored regularly as you drive. You'll be able to see if a horse manages to get a body part outside the trailer, which can have tragic consequences.You'll also be able to see the semi bearing down on you and will be able to react accordingly.\n\n**More Travel Tips**\n\nA few final reminders:\n\n  Until you understand that when you back and steer left, your rig turns right, look for drive-through spaces at shows or rest stops when you park.\n\n  Carry water for horses to drink and water for people to drink.\n\n  Carry snacks for horses and people. Horses can eat their snacks (i.e., hay) as they travel, but for safety sake you should eat snacks only when you've stopped. Eating while driving increases the risk for accidents.\n\n  Carry first aid kits for horses and people.\n\n  Carry a cell phone, fully charged, but with a vehicle power cord as well. If you must use the phone, pull into a rest area and stop the vehicle. Using a cell phone while driving in a car increases the likelihood of an accident by 30 percent. Factoring in the challenges of managing a rig carrying horses, the risk only increases. Don't do it.\n\n**Don't Double Up**\n\nFor simplicity's sake, you might be tempted to bridle your horse and then slip the halter over the bridle before you travel. Don't do it.Your horse could catch the bridle inside the trailer and do serious damage to his mouth. The bridle also would interfere with hay consumption during the trip.\n\n## When You Reach Your Destination\n\nAfter safely reaching your destination, back your horse out of the trailer, let him graze on the lead, if possible, or walk him for at least fifteen minutes. Once your horse is comfortable and relaxed, you're ready to tack up and mount.\n\n### _Bolt-Free Bridling_\n\nSometimes it's impossible to bridle a horse in a trailer, and many horses don't cooperate if they must be bridled in an open space. By following these simple steps, you'll be able to bridle your horse with ease at any location, and at no time will he think he is free and able to escape.You'll loop the lead over his head in two places to \"secure\"him while you bridle him.\n\n**1**. Before you slip the halter off, prepare to apply a lead halter. Stand on the near side of the horse, at his head, close enough to reach under his jaw with your right hand.\n\n**2**. Unlatch or unbuckle the leather halter. Before you let it slip down onto your left hand, or before a helper grabs it, with your right hand pass the nonchain end of the lead away from you, under the horse's throatlatch, and back up over his poll. Rest your right hand on his nose, a few inches above the nostrils, grasping and holding the lead at that point. Basically, you are creating a figure eight around his poll and nose.\n\n**3**. Run the end of the lead away from you, over his nose, where the noseband of a halter would rest.\n\n**4**. Bring the end of the lead back under his nose, grasping it and the loose length of halter hanging from the near side of the horse's head with your right hand. The lead forms a loose figure eight that you now grasp in the middle.\n\n**5**. Slip the reins over his head with your left hand, grasping the crown-piece of the bridle at the same time. Alternatively, have a helper slip the reins over the horse's head while you hold the top of the bridle.\n\n**6**. Slide the bridle up as you normally do, positioning the bit under his mouth and slipping it in, all with your left hand. Slip the crownpiece over one ear, bringing the ear forward, and then prepare to let the temporary hand-held halter slip away as you use your right hand to slide his near-side ear through the bridle.\n\n**7**. Release the lead, which will drop to your horse's feet. Then latch or buckle the halter.\n\n### _Mounting_\n\nIf you are traveling to a show, always bring and use a mounting block. After loading and hauling your horse, and putting on his tack carefully with the least possible fuss and muss on his part, don't take any chances when mounting. Imagine your horse's confusion if you go through all that work, only to swat him up against a car bumper so you can clamber aboard. And you certainly wouldn't want to bounce down on his back after an inadequate leg up. If bystanders are pressed into groom service, you might even be foisted up and over \u2014 how embarrassing!\n\n\u2666 \u2666 \u2666\n\nIt's incredibly demanding to travel with your horse. But the rewards are worth the effort, particularly when your horse loads on cue, travels safely and comfortably with minimal stress, and maintains his condition.\n_The mission of Storey Publishing is to serve our customers  \nby publishing practical information that encourages personal  \nindependence in harmony with the environment_.\n\nEdited by Marie Salter  \nCover illustration by Joanna Rissanen  \nCover design by Carol J. Jessop (Black Trout Design)  \nText illustrations by Joanna Rissanen, except page 5 (right) by Jim\n\nDykeman and page 23 (top) by Alison Kolesar\n\nText production by Jennifer Jepson Smith and Deb Daly\n\nCopyright \u00a9 2001 by Storey Publishing, LLC\n\nAll rights reserved. No part of this bulletin may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages or reproduce illustrations in a review with appropriate credits; nor may any part of this bulletin be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means \u2014 electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or other \u2014 without written permission from the publisher.\n\nThe information in this bulletin is true and complete to the best of our knowledge. All recommendations are made without guarantee on the part of the author or Storey Publishing. The author and publisher disclaim any liability in connection with the use of this information. For additional information please contact Storey Books, 210 MASS MoCA Way, North Adams, MA 01247.\n\nStorey books and bulletins are available for special premium and promotional uses and for customized editions. For further information, please call the Custom Publishing Department at 1-800-793-9396.\n\nPrinted in the United States\n\n**Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data**\n\nMcBride, Laura Harrison.\n\nTrailer-training your horse \/ Laura Harrison McBride.\n\np. cm. \u2014 (A Storey country wisdom bulletin; A-279)\n\nISBN 1-58017-417-5 (alk. paper)\n\n1. Horses\u2014Transportation. 2. Horses\u2014Training. 3. Horse  \ntrailers. I. Title. II. Series.\n\nSF285.385. M33 2001\n\n636.1'083\u2014dc21\n\n2001049576\n\n## MORE COUNTRY WISDOM  \nBULLETINS YOU WILL ENJOY!\n\n_These and other Storey Country Wisdom Bulletins are available for $3.95 at your local bookstores, garden centers, farm stores, and gift shops. Use the order numbers listed under each bulletin to make your requests. You can also order directly from Storey Books by writing to us at 210 MASS MoCA Way, North Adams, MA 01247, or by calling 1-800-441-5700. For more information about our books and bulletins, visit our Web site atwww.storey.com_.\n","meta":{"redpajama_set_name":"RedPajamaBook"}}
+{"text":"\n_The Happy Lawyer_\nNANCY LEVIT & DOUGLAS O. LINDER\n\n# **The Happy Lawyer**\n\n_Making a Good Life in the Law_\n\nOxford University Press, Inc., publishes works that further  \nOxford University's objective of excellence  \nin research, scholarship, and education.\n\nOxford New York  \nAuckland Cape Town Dar es Salaam Hong Kong Karachi  \nKuala Lumpur Madrid Melbourne Mexico City Nairobi  \nNew Delhi Shanghai Taipei Toronto\n\nWith offices in  \nArgentina Austria Brazil Chile Czech Republic France Greece  \nGuatemala Hungary Italy Japan Poland Portugal Singapore  \nSouth Korea Switzerland Thailand Turkey Ukraine Vietnam\n\nCopyright \u00a9 2010 by Oxford University Press, Inc.\n\nPublished by Oxford University Press, Inc.  \n198 Madison Avenue, New York, New York 10016\n\nwww.oup.com\n\nOxford is a registered trademark of Oxford University Press\n\nAll rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior permission of Oxford University Press.\n\nLibrary of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Levit, Nancy.  \nThe happy lawyer : making a good life in the law \/ Nancy Levit and Douglas O. Linder.  \np. cm.  \nIncludes bibliographical references and index.  \nISBN 978-0-19-539232-6  \n1. Practice of law\u2014United States\u2014Psychological aspects.  \n2. Lawyers\u2014Job satisfaction\u2014United States. I. Linder, Douglas O., 1951\u2013  \nII. Title.  \nKF300.L485 2010  \n340.023\u203273\u2014dc22 2009047527\n\n9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1\n\nPrinted in the United States of America  \non acid-free paper\n_For Tim, Dylan, and Aaron  \nNEL_\n\n_For Cheryl, Kari, and Ann  \nDOL_\n_The logic of the rebel is to want to serve justice so as not to add to the injustice of the human condition, to insist on plain language so as not to increase the universal falsehood, and to wager, in spite of human misery, for happiness._\n\n\u2014Albert Camus\n\n## **Contents**\n\n_Foreword_\n\nCHAPTER 1 Are Lawyers Unhappy?\n\nCHAPTER 2 Happiness: A Primer\n\nCHAPTER 3 What Makes Lawyers Happy and Unhappy\n\nCHAPTER 4 The Happiness Toolbox\n\nCHAPTER 5 Preparing for a Satisfying Career: The Law School Years\n\nCHAPTER 6 What Law Firms Can Do to Make Lawyers Happier\n\nCHAPTER 7 Lawyers' Stories\n\nCHAPTER 8 Seeking Happier Ground\n\n_Acknowledgments_\n\n_Notes_\n\n_Index_\n\n## **Foreword**\n\nWE LIVE IN A NATION FOUNDED BY LAWYERS. THIRTY-four of the fifty-five men who gathered in Philadelphia in 1787 to draft our Constitution were lawyers, including the document's principal architect, James Madison. Lawyer Thomas Jefferson authored the Declaration of Independence (with the help of John Adams, another lawyer).\n\nAmong the inalienable rights Jefferson listed in his famous document of 1776, along with the rights to life and to liberty, was the right \"to the pursuit of Happiness.\" \"Happiness\" is not a word you expect to find in a formal document drafted and debated by sober eighteenth-century politicians. But there it is on parchment, one of the three most important rights of a free people.\n\nOf course, Jefferson couldn't promise we would find happiness, only that we had a right to pursue it. And pursue it we have, and still do\u2014with ever more intensity\u2014today. A quick Google search or perusal of the self-help section at your local bookstore will reveal the depth of our current interest in happiness. A whole movement in modern psychology called \"positive psychology\" has sprung up to help improve our odds of finding a greater measure of happiness.\n\nFor all our efforts, Americans are no happier today than we were a half century ago\u2014and, by most measures, we're less happy. We're richer than ever before, have more leisure time, and are awash in happiness literature, but we still cannot seem to get more satisfaction.\n\nFor lawyers, the picture is even bleaker. Many lawyers, as many as 70 percent in one poll, say they would not choose a legal career if they had to do it all over again. Half of all lawyers would discourage their kids from becoming lawyers. Over one-third of big firm associates leave their firms within three years of being hired. Students at Stanford Law School, dissatisfied with the nature of large firm practice, have launched a movement to change the way law is practiced.\n\nIt is an exaggeration, however, to describe law as a profession in crisis. We do not see headlines announcing: \"Lawyers leaving profession in droves.\" The number of law school applicants remains consistent, and the number of law schools is increasing. Despite the odd story of a lawyer leaving practice to start a vineyard or become a hot air balloonist, most in the practice say they intend to stick it out. Moreover, many say they are at least reasonably happy, even while admitting they'd like to be more so.\n\nThe story of the emotional state of American lawyers today is complicated and nuanced. Lawyers are smart people; they expect complications and appreciate nuance. If lawyers are not as happy as they'd like to be, there are many possible explanations for that. People generally don't become lawyers because they wake up one day and say, \"By God, I love the law!\" They might become lawyers because as college seniors they simply wanted to keep their options open and law school seemed a better place to do that than, say, dental school. Moreover, it might well be that the sort of person best suited to the practice of law is more likely to have a personality type somewhat prone to unhappiness. In law, unlike in many other fields, it often helps to be an anxious, pessimistic person who worries about all the things that can go wrong if, for example, a contract isn't written just so. If lawyers are slightly unhappier than the typical American, it may be because unhappy people are more likely to become lawyers rather than that the practice of law has made them unhappy.\n\nSorting out this complex story is one of the goals of this book. But we don't stop there. While recognizing the limits of self-help, we offer \"a happiness toolbox\" that we believe can lead to happiness boosts for lawyers who follow our suggestions. There are multiple paths to happiness, and a tool that works well for you might not for the lawyer in the next-door office. We also will offer tips for law firms and law schools that wish to improve levels of satisfaction among their ranks. Along the way, we'll share stories of both unhappy lawyers and happy lawyers, learning what we can from the insights they've garnered along their diverse professional trails.\n\nNow seems like the right time for a book about finding satisfaction in a law career. The past couple of decades have produced a torrent of research on happiness from the fields of neuroscience and positive psychology. Some of the research results suggest happiness boosts that are largely to be found outside the office, through activities ranging from playing tennis to meditating to eating chocolate. But many other of these research findings have important implications for the way law is practiced, if happiness really matters to lawyers\u2014and it obviously does. Perhaps more critically, such research also contributes to the better design of happiness strategies: we know, for example, that liking and trusting your co-workers contributes more to your long run satisfaction than snagging the corner office or a six-figure bonus.\n\nIn addition to the explosion of research on happiness, the practice of law has changed in a way that makes career satisfaction much more relevant to law schools than used to be the case. Law schools that previously told entering students, \"Look to your left and look to your right; one of the three of you won't be here at the end of the year\" now realize they have a stake in convincing prospective students that they can best help them achieve that satisfying law career they're looking for\u2014happy alumni are more likely to be generous and supportive alumni. This generation of students, more than any previous generation, ranks life satisfaction highest among their goals. Schools that can credibly promise a better shot at career happiness are in a better position to recruit the best and brightest students.\n\nLaw firms also have a growing interest in making associates happy. The old system that welcomed many to the firm but retained few of them (the \"up or out\" system) has given way to a process that places a premium on careful selection and retention. Firms have come to recognize the high costs of associate attrition. They now understand that demoralization among associates affects the quality of their work product as well as the law firms' bottom line. There is a growing consensus that trends adversely affecting happiness\u2014such as ever-increasing billable hour requirements and declining civility in the profession\u2014no longer can be ignored if firms hope to continue to attract the members of a new generation that places personal happiness on the top of life's wish list. Moreover, many older lawyers are coming to the same conclusion as a lot of newer ones: \"If I'm not happy doing what I'm doing, what's the point?\"\n\nIn short, lawyers, law schools, and law firms have a greater interest than ever in happiness. In the pages to come, we will provide tips and techniques, shaped by the new research, for all who have an interest in increasing satisfaction with the practice of law.\n\nOf course, as wise people have told us, happiness isn't everything. It's a very important thing, but so are other values that matter. There is even something to be said for melancholy\u2014and we will say it. Without unhappiness from time to time, would happiness lose its meaning? Would society lose an important source of creative inspiration, and would we lose a springboard to personal growth? We'll explore those questions.\n\nMainly, though, this is a book about forging a path to a better life for law students and lawyers. We cannot offer any promises\u2014lawyers, of all people, should understand that\u2014but it is our hope that the words that follow will help make your life as a lawyer more satisfying, fulfilling, and, well, happy.\n_The Happy Lawyer_\n\n## **CHAPTER 1\n\nAre Lawyers Unhappy?**\n\n_Lawyers have never made more money and never been so unhappy._\n\n\u2013Cordell Parvin, \"Career Happiness,\" September 24, 2008\n\nARE WE HAPPY BEING LAWYERS? BEING LAWYERS, WE tend to answer that question with other questions: What do you mean by \"happy\"? On a scale that runs from having root canals to a night of fine wines and sex on a tropical island, where does \"unhappiness\" turn into \"happiness\"? Do you mean \"happy\" right now as I write footnote 17 on this brief for Acme Investments or \"happy\" during the course of my ten-year legal career? If I'm happy one-quarter of the time, miserable one- quarter of the time, and somewhere in between half the time, how do I answer your question? Also, is anyone else going to know the answer that I give you?\u2013because if they do I'm going to inflate my happiness quotient.\n\nThose are all good questions and just the sort that bedevil happiness researchers. The fact is that happiness to one person might not mean the same thing as happiness to another person, yet that doesn't stop researchers from asking people whether or not they are happy. Nor are researchers stymied by the fact that happiness, when it happens, is a temporary state and your two-o'clock giggles might turn into three-o'clock tears. And then there is the \"Lake Wobegon problem\"\u2013just like the children in the mythical Minnesota town, nearly everyone\u2014in just about every category that matters (including happiness)\u2014considers themselves above average. _Well_ above average. When a researcher synthesized 916 surveys on happiness, conducted in forty-five countries and including more than one million respondents, he found that people, on average, ranked their own happiness as about a seven on a one-to-ten scale. A reviewer, summarizing recent literature on happiness research, concluded that \"claiming to be happy ... appears to be nearly universal, as long as you're not living in a war zone, on the street, or in extreme emotional or physical pain.\"\n\nSo, once again, are lawyers happy? Given that most humans are\u2014or say they are\u2014happy, it is not surprising that most of the 1.2 million of us (one of every 250 people in the United States), say we are. Yet it is revealing that lawyers, as a group, are decidedly less happy than are members of many other professions. Members of the clergy, travel agents, architects, scientists, engineers, airline pilots, physicians, financial planners, and detectives are all happier than lawyers. Even repair persons, housekeepers, and butlers report higher levels of happiness than do members of the legal profession. Still, it could be worse: lawyers do report more career satisfaction than either roofers or gas station attendants. Overall, 43 percent of American lawyers say they are \"very happy these days\"\u2014a statistic that is hardly alarming, but also suggests plenty of room for improvement. Not all lawyers are miserable, but neither is it a cheery profession.\n\nYou probably don't need convincing that the question whether lawyers are satisfied with their careers is an important one. Consider that you probably spend about one-third of your life and one-half of your waking hours on the job. How good can a whole life be if one-third of it is miserable?\n\nIn this chapter, we examine both empirical and anecdotal information about lawyers' happinesses and dissatisfactions. A wealth of research exists, but it seems conflicted: \"There are two literatures on lawyer satisfaction, and their findings differ so starkly that one might wonder whether they are studying the same phenomenon.\" We'll attempt to make sense of the seemingly contradictory data. We'll also look at who in the legal profession is happy and who's not, which may in turn shed more light on the lawyer happiness surveys.\n\n### MAKING SENSE OF LAWYER HAPPINESS DATA\n\nSurvey data, of course, depend on the nature of the question asked. The 43 percent of lawyers in the survey by the National Opinion Research Center at the University of Chicago who said they were \"very happy\" with their lives might make you think that there is a large contingent of happy lawyers. But when survey questions focus on _career_ , as opposed to _life_ , satisfaction, there is only about a coin-flip chance of being content. Results from an American Bar Association (ABA) survey revealed that only 55 percent of the lawyers responding said that they were satisfied with their job. A 2001 ABA survey of two thousand members of its Young Lawyers Division showed similar job satisfaction levels, with a majority of those responding saying that they were \"at least somewhat satisfied with both their current position and the practice of law generally.\" Yes, more than half reporting satisfaction is good\u2014but remember, seven on a one-to-ten scale is just par on the happiness course. Turning from satisfied lawyers to those who are dissatisfied (ignoring for now those who report neutral feelings about their careers), we find that career dissatisfaction numbers have remained fairly steady across two decades, according to several empirical studies conducted by the ABA Young Lawyers Division. In surveys conducted in 1984, 1990, and 1995, between 20 and 27 percent of lawyers stated that they were either \"dissatisfied or very dissatisfied with their work.\" Most of the young lawyers reporting dissatisfaction didn't hate their jobs: fewer than seven percent of respondents \"expressed _great_ dissatisfaction with either their career or the practice of law.\" The Young Lawyer Division's survey, sampling a population of joiners (who tend to be a disproportionately happy group), probably suggests more satisfaction with the practice than there really is.\n\nGrimmer is the 1992 _California Lawyer_ poll reporting that seven out often respondents would select a career other than law if they could make the decision over. A 1998 survey of Michigan lawyers echoed the California results, with 60 percent of lawyers saying \"they would not choose to become lawyers again if they had the chance to start their careers again.\" These studies of wishful do-over rates should be viewed with some skepticism. When surveys depend on voluntary participation from a wide swath of attorneys, ask about job dissatisfaction, and have a low response rate, they probably overstate dissatisfaction levels. Disgruntled lawyers are likely to be vastly overrepresented, as they are the lawyers most likely to take the trouble to respond to such a poll. For instance, the _California Lawyer_ survey\u2014which showed so many lawyers to be miserable with their careers\u2014was sent to potential respondents by fax; and it suffers from possible data collection flaws:\n\nBecause this survey does not use a random sample of lawyers, but instead relies on the voluntary participation of the magazine's readership, it is highly unlikely to provide a representative picture of the target population. Selection bias occurs in at least two ways: first, the readers of this magazine may not be representative of all California lawyers, and second (and more important), lawyers with an axe to grind may be much more likely to participate in a poll about job satisfaction. The magazine does not even report the total number of respondents to the poll, further diminishing its value as a measure of the attitudes of its target population.\n\nOn the other hand, a recent twenty-year longitudinal study of the University of Virginia (UVA) Law School class of 1987, in which 81 percent of the respondents said they were \"satisfied with their decision to become a lawyer, and 86 percent satisfied with their lives more broadly\" might overstate lawyer happiness. Perhaps Virginia law alumni are just a satisfied bunch, of course, but it is also possible that respondents to a poll sponsored by their alma mater might feel subtle pressure to help those who dedicated their lives to educating UVA law grads feel good about the effort they put in: \"See, you did well: I'm pretty happy being a lawyer.\"\n\nThe Virginia findings, however, are generally supported by a 2007 study of lawyers in firms of varying sizes from across the country. The study showed satisfaction levels only slightly below those of the UVA law graduates, with the vast majority of respondents either \"extremely satisfied\" (35 percent) or \"moderately satisfied\" (44 percent) with their decisions to become a lawyer. Happy and _proud_ , it seems. Eighty percent of those responding to a recent ABA survey were proud to be attorneys, and an equal percentage found legal practice to be intellectually stimulating.\n\nWhen lawyers are asked about their decision to become a lawyer\u2014reflecting on all the profession has meant and could mean to them in the future\u2014it is probably reasonable to expect a somewhat higher rate of satisfaction than when they are asked about how satisfied they are with their present law job, which might call to mind memories of long work hours, uncivil lawyers, and inadequate compensation\u2014especially when compared to the chum next door. It is not a stretch to say that while lawyers are only about as satisfied with their jobs as random workers off the street, they still tend to feel, deep down, that law is a career worth pursuing.\n\nGeneric surveys of lawyer happiness lump all lawyers together, obscuring the fact that some populations of lawyers are happier than others. In large law firms, for example, dissatisfaction runs high. Firms across the nation report high rates of attorney attrition\u2014\"a whopping 37 percent of associates at big law firms, defined by the study as those employing more than 500 lawyers, quit their firms by the end of their third years of practice.\" Firms are hemorrhaging their newer lawyers: in any single year, law firms will lose almost one-fifth of their associates, although most enter other jobs in law. A focus on large firm turmoil has led many to conclude that state of the profession is worse than it probably is. Law professor Douglas Litowitz capsulizes the state of despair: \"Lawyers are pathologically unhappy.\" A much-cited article in the _Cardozo Law Review_ , \"Why Lawyers Are Unhappy,\" notes what the authors call \"pervasive disenchantment\" in the legal profession. Robert Kurson, a 1990 Harvard Law School graduate, bemoaned the state of practice in an article in _Esquire_ entitled \"Who's Killing the Great Lawyers of Harvard?\" Kurson describes classmates either moving out of law firms or anxious to do so: \"One after another, those who have left law, especially law firms, seem happy. Those who have not are suffering, or worse, resigned. They talk about losing themselves.... More vow to leave the law with the next infusion of cash or gumption.\"\n\nTop law firms aren't begging law grads to apply. Associates are not abandoning jobs in droves and applying to art schools. Rarely do lawyers leap out of seventeenth-story windows. It is clear that portrayals of a profession in crisis are somewhat exaggerated.\n\nStill, there are other indications that all is not well within the profession. Lawyers suffer exceptionally high rates of depression, alcoholism, and suicide. Studies reveal that lawyers have the highest rate of depression among all occupational categories, with incidents of major depressive disorders at 3.6 times the rates for nonlawyers with similar sociodemographic characteristics. A Johns Hopkins University study of twelve thousand workers in 104 occupations found that while only 3 to 5 percent of the general population suffers from major depressive disorders, more than 10 percent of people in three job categories (secretaries, pre-kindergarten and special education teachers, and attorneys) suffer major depression. Lawyers also experience higher rates of drug and alcohol abuse than both the general population and other professionals. A survey of lawyers in the state of Washington estimated that one in five lawyers suffers substance abuse problems, a rate almost twice the national average.\n\nThe high rates of depression and suicide among lawyers is indisputable, but it is unclear what this tells us about satisfaction in the legal career generally. Depression is a qualitatively different state than merely being unhappy. Depressed and suicidal people are unhappy, to be sure, but clinical depression can be attributable to genetics, biochemistry, personality traits, and medical conditions, as well as situational or environmental factors, such as what is happening at work. Unhappiness rates and depression rates do not correlate precisely. Finland, a nation with one of the happiest populations on the planet according to surveys, also reports one of the highest suicide rates. Artists are, as a group, extremely happy with their chosen career, yet have one of the highest suicide rates among all occupations. (The same artist who cannot imagine being anything else might turn to alcohol or internal demons for inspiration.) Law might attract some seriously depressed people\u2014more so than primary education, let's say\u2014so we can hardly blame the practice when surveys later show that people who were depressed when they became lawyers are still depressed years later. At the least, however, the high rates of depression and alcoholism should be a caution. The practice of law\u2014with its accompanying time pressures, high stakes, adversarial positions, and win-loss outcomes\u2014doesn't seem to be a great cure for depression.\n\n### WHERE WE STAND\n\nWhat should we make of this decidedly mixed bag of data? Professor Kathleen Hull, a sociologist who specializes in qualitative methods, concludes that \"the most valid, well-designed research has produced little, if any support for the notion that lawyers are unhappy in their work.\" We come down a little differently. When we look at the cumulative picture painted by all of the studies, the results are mixed, but we are inclined to conclude that most lawyers fall somewhere near the middle of the happiness continuum. The more recent studies, and those with better sampling techniques and more sophisticated methodologies\u2014such as the emerging longitudinal research\u2014do indicate that the majority of lawyers are happy with their decision to become an attorney and generally satisfied with their lives. Nevertheless, even among lawyers who are pleased that they chose law, dissatisfaction, sometimes deep, exists regarding certain aspects of their jobs.\n\nFor most lawyers, things could be better. We believe lawyers could become happier with their work. Some lawyers are in the wrong type of practice\u2014their work does not align with their values, strengths, or interests. Law students often flounder, don't know what they want to do with their law degree, and surrender to traditional career paths or other people's expectations for them. Law schools could do a much better job of steering their students toward satisfying careers. But we will talk with you about all of those issues in the remaining chapters.\n\nWhether lawyers are happy is a question with an answer more complicated than \"yes\" or \"no.\" Some lawyers are happy; some are not. Let's see who is which category. In the next section, we also will consider what characteristics\u2014of both individuals and their jobs\u2014are more likely to lead to a lawyer's satisfaction.\n\n### WHO'S HAPPY AND WHO'S NOT\n\nGood news! If you are an attorney who is over fifty years old and work at a smaller firm, or work in-house or for the government, or work part-time, chances are you are among the happiest of lawyers. If you work part-time for a small branch of government, you could be in lawyer nirvana. On the other hand, if you are a mid-level associate at a large firm who is stuck in a library with fourteen crates of discovery documents, then you have been thinking about jumping ship, haven't you?\n\nProbing deeper into the data on reported career satisfaction, job happiness among attorneys is dependent in part on a number of variables: age, race, sex, firm size, and type of practice.\n\n#### WHAT DO LAWYERS DO?\n\n74% are in private practice.\n\n8% work in government.\n\n8% work in private industry.\n\n5% are retired or inactive.\n\n3% are in the judiciary.\n\n2% are in academic, consulting or accounting jobs.\n\n1% work in legal aid or public defender offices.\n\n#### TYPE OF PRACTICE\n\nMore than two-thirds (68 percent) of attorneys who work in the public sector report being satisfied with their career, the appreciation they receive, and their work-life balance. The least happy (although wealthiest) lawyers are those in large law firms, with only 44 percent reporting that they are satisfied. In between those two extremes fall solo practitioners and small firm lawyers, who generally report that their work autonomy results in greater career satisfaction. Lawyers who engage in routine or repetitive types of practice with little room for creativity, autonomy, or innovation\u2014and especially those who wear the straightjacket of billable hours\u2014are more likely to experience discontent. Attorneys working part-time report greater job satisfaction than those working full-time.\n\n#### AGE\n\nLawyers over the age of fifty are happier than younger lawyers. This comports with a study of more than two million subjects in eighty countries on happiness levels in the general population, which showed a somewhat U-shaped curve: young people and people over the age of fifty are generally happier than those in-between, with a slight trough of unhappiness for women around age forty and men around fifty. Somewhat related to age is a person's position or status in a firm. Much of the anecdotal evidence relates to disgruntled associates rather than partners. A survey of lawyers in practice between six and nine years showed that four out often were satisfied with their careers, compared to six out often who had been in practice for more than a decade. The reported increase in happiness as a career progresses may also have something to do with those who are least happy in law taking another job after several years of practice or finding their niche or gaining more control in their job over time.\n\n#### INCOME\n\nMoney matters, but maybe not in the way you'd think. You might assume that because law is a generally well-compensated occupation, its practitioners would not have economic dissatisfactions. But it isn't the absolute income levels that matter to lawyer happiness: far more important for lawyers is how their salaries compare to people they perceive as peers, as well as the pressure and uncertainty attached to keeping a steady flow of income. In 2006 the median earnings of all lawyers was $102, 470, although salaries varied by geographic region, sphere of work (public or private), practice size, and area of practice. Interestingly, the salaries of most lawyers are well above the amounts where research shows income matters much to happiness. While the difference in happiness levels between the wealthy and those below the poverty line is significant, studies show only a weak link between income and life satisfaction, particularly if the wage earner makes more than $50,000. \"Those with incomes over $90,000 were nearly twice as likely to report being 'very happy' as those with incomes below $20,000, although there is hardly any difference between the highest income group and those in the $50,000 to $89,999 bracket.\" So, if you earn more than, say, $70,000 (the midpoint of the $50,000 to $89,999 bracket), your absolute salary level should not matter much to your general life satisfaction\u2014you will be earning enough to live comfortably.\n\nBut, as we will discuss in chapter 4, relative income matters to people\u2014maybe even especially to lawyers, being the competitive bunch that we are. And, of course, lawyers just starting out and shouldering law school debt will have economic worries. Even for the well paid, uncertainty makes people unhappy, and uncertainty attaches to the pressures of keeping a steady flow of business coming in the door.\n\n#### SEX\n\nDuring the past thirty-five years, women have become less happy, both in absolute measures and in relation to men. Across all education levels and in most industrialized countries, whether women are young or old, single or married, working or staying at home, they report less happiness than women did three decades ago. One speculation is that work-family pressures have intensified for women, with women shouldering more economic responsibilities and no fewer family responsibilities. Another possible explanation is that increases in opportunities to succeed come with increased pressures to do so.\n\nFemale lawyers have distinctive patterns of happiness and dissatisfactions with the practice of law. Women are leaving the profession much more rapidly than their male counterparts. Attrition from private law firms is almost twice as high among female associates than among comparable male associates. Women do not leave law because they are dissatisfied with the substance of their work; in fact, female attorneys are generally happier than male attorneys with the type of work that they do. Rather, the problems women have with the practice of law relate to a lack of opportunities for professional development, concerns about their work environment, and the difficulties of juggling careers and families. A study of Massachusetts lawyers who worked at the one hundred largest firms in the state showed that for women who were leaving firms but not leaving the workforce, the reason most often cited was \"difficulty integrating work and family\/personal life.\" A twenty-year longitudinal study of University of Virginia law graduates showed two major differences between male and female lawyers. Males were more satisfied with their work-life balance than female lawyers, while women \"were far more likely than men to interrupt or forego full time employment (39% v. 1%), mainly in order to care for children, and were also more likely to have a spouse or partner employed full-time outside the home (77% v. 24%).\"\n\nProfessors Kenneth Dau-Schmidt, Marc Galanter, Kaushik Mukhopadhaya, and Kathleen Hull evaluated surveys from 12,000 University of Michigan Law School alumni spanning more than a quarter of a century, looking for the impact of gender on legal careers; what they found was that taking time away from law practice to care for children, more than gender, altered lawyers' career paths and affected their satisfaction. As Galanter explains:\" 'The big dividing line in terms of the experience attorneys have in private practice is not between men and women... It is between women with children and everybody else.'\" While the major differences in the aggregate appear between mothers and others, fathers who assume primary caretaking roles (a smaller group) suffer greater career setbacks. Attorneys who take time off from paid work for childcare, whether male or female, will experience reduced earnings and a reduced chance of partnership later in their careers, and \"male attorneys who perform childcare fare even worse than female attorneys who do the same.\" Despite the career costs, however, taking time away from work to do childcare turns out to be the right call for most lawyers: \"Both the men and women who take time away from paid work to do childcare, and who work fewer hours, are significantly happier with the balance of work and family in their lives as compared with any of the other groups.\"\n\nAlthough almost one-third of attorneys are female, and women have comprised 40 percent or more of law school graduates since 1985, women account for only 17 percent of \"partnership positions in law firms, despite graduating from law school and obtaining junior associate positions at an equal rate as men for the last twenty years.\" But not all partnerships are created equal. Almost three-quarters of larger law firms (defined as those employing more than seventy-five lawyers) have several tiers of partnership; women hold nonequity partner positions in disproportionate shares and collect smaller income shares upon attaining partnership status. In addition to the glass ceiling, female lawyers report several frustrations: a lack of networking opportunities, less desirable assignments, an absence of mentors, and instances of bias in the courtroom. Of course, men are not immune from discrimination, as law firms are much less hospitable to paternity leave than maternity leave.\n\n#### RACE\n\nAfrican Americans, Hispanics, Asian Americans, and Native Americans collectively constitute just less than 10 percent of all lawyers in this country, significantly below their representation in the population. An American Bar Foundation survey of law school graduates who had been in practice for three years or less found that Blacks expressed the highest level of satisfaction with their decision to become a lawyer, as well as the highest level of satisfaction\u2014among all racial groups\u2014with the substance of their work. Satisfaction levels regarding career choice were almost as high among Hispanics. More than 80 percent of Blacks and just less than 80 percent of Hispanics reported that they were either moderately or extremely satisfied with the decision to enter law. These reported rates of satisfaction may have to do with practice setting\u2014Black and Hispanic lawyers were much more likely to be working in nonprofit or government jobs. Interestingly, their satisfaction levels were higher despite having lower median salaries.\n\nAsians reported the lowest satisfaction levels for the substance of their work; but Asians and Whites expressed the highest satisfaction averages with their job setting. Both of those groups were more likely than members of other races to be working in business settings or at larger law firms. Yet members of the three largest minority groups (Blacks, Asians, and Hispanics), while satisfied with their decisions to become lawyers, \"were all more likely than their white peers to report that they were already looking for another position or intended to remain in their current position for less than a year.\" For Asians, the dissatisfactions may relate to the conditions at large law firms; Hispanics and Blacks expressed concerns about the absence of power track opportunities.\n\nAt the intersection of race, sex, and practice area, the unhappiest lawyers working for the nation's top firms are mid-level females of color. Thus, although Blacks and Hispanics may be happier than other races with their decisions to become lawyers, when all races are combined and the cohort is lawyers in practice at large firms, women of color are distinctly unhappy. In 2005, eight out often minority women associates left their jobs within five years. In one study conducted by the ABA, almost half of all women reported that they were subjected to demeaning remarks or harassment. Respondents in large firms gave negative report cards in areas such as the quality of work, the number of interesting projects, and the quality of professional development: \"white male lawyers graded their career satisfaction A, white women and minority men B and minority women B minus to a C plus.\"\n\n#### OTHER FACTORS\n\nVarious personal and demographic factors enter into lawyer happiness. Graduates of lower-ranked law schools report higher levels of happiness than graduates of top-ranked law schools. In one study, only 27 percent of graduates of the top-ten law schools reported that they were extremely satisfied with their career choice, compared to 43 percent of graduates from fourth-tier law schools. Six out often graduates of top-tier law schools intended to leave their employer within two years, while only four out often graduates from fourth-tier law schools reported any intent to move. Researchers considered the possibility that top-tier law school graduates were more likely to be working at large corporate firms and, therefore, might be dissatisfied simply by the nature of their practice. But when researchers controlled for that possibility by only comparing responses from lawyers working at the one hundred largest law firms, the differences became even more pronounced: \"26 percent of elites report extreme satisfaction, compared with almost half (49 percent) of those in the fourth tier.\"\n\nIndividual traits and circumstances can combine with firm policies or practices to produce unhappiness. Gay and lesbian lawyers at firms that afford no benefits to their partners may chafe at the arbitrariness. Lawyers whose religion recognizes Sabbath on Saturday may feel that they don't fit the culture of law firms in which attorneys are expected to show up for face time on Saturdays. Unattractive or obese lawyers may receive fewer assignments that involve public or court appearances. One law firm back in the 1960s did not hire men less than six feet tall because the firm thought that smaller men would not have a commanding presence in the courtroom. Life isn't always fair, and neither are the powers-that-be in law firms. When you feel that you have been the victim of discrimination, your happiness is bound to take a nose-dive.\n\n### THERE'S NO SORTING HAT\n\nAt the Hogwarts of J. K. Rowling's imagination, the Sorting Hat magically assesses the character and talents of first-year students and assigns them to the house\u2014Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, Slytherin, or Gryffindor\u2014that best matches their individual strengths. Every student ends up where he or she belongs and stands the best chance of thriving.\n\nIn the muggle world\u2014our world\u2014there is no Sorting Hat. Choosing a career path requires doing our own assessments of our abilities, interests, and desires. Every year some 48,000 Americans perform that assessment, however imperfectly, and set down a path that they hope will lead to a satisfying career of practicing law. The fact that so many of them, perhaps 20,000 or so, will end up disappointed has many, varied causes. Some of the disappointed were never meant to be lawyers, their talents and passions pointing elsewhere\u2014perhaps in the direction of winemaking, printmaking, or teaching.\n\nOther unsatisfied lawyers embarked on their careers with unrealistic expectations about law practice. They considered themselves the best and the brightest, excelling in college and graduating from top law schools, and they believed their hard work entitled them to fulfilling and happy careers. High expectations and feelings of entitlement to great jobs might account for the higher levels of dissatisfaction among graduates of the nation's highest-ranked schools compared to those lower on the pecking order. People who go into sanitation work do not expect to be made deliriously happy by their jobs. They haven't dreamed since junior high of joining the sanitation force. \"It's a job isn't it?\" they might say, and they are pleased to have one. Once at work, however, they find some things about the job they like\u2014the camaraderie, the work in the sunshine, the sense that they are serving their community\u2014and, you know, they begin to feel pretty good about their job. When reality fails to match high expectations, however, as it probably does for many lawyers, the result can be a gnawing sense that a better career choice could have been made.\n\nFinally, one other point should be made about the surveys that place lawyers somewhere in the middle of the career satisfaction continuum. What it means to be, say, \"fairly satisfied\" with a job might be very different for different types of lawyers. For the trial lawyer, whose career is marked with the emotional peaks and valleys that result from our adversarial process, \"fairly satisfied\" might in fact reflect a perceived ratio of quite high highs and quite low lows. Trial work is a \"high amplitude\" career. On the other hand, a \"fairly satisfied\" transactional lawyer might be one who finds modest pleasures in the daily practice of law but keeps wishing for a bit more of an emotional charge. One person's \"fairly happy\" is not the same as another person's \"fairly happy.\"\n\nThe fact that more lawyers are happy with their decision to choose law than they are with their specific jobs suggests a sense among lawyers that careers could be better, either if they found another firm, found a new area of practice, or discovered better ways of coping with the frustrations of their existing work situations. We believe that they are right\u2014most law careers _could_ be better\u2014and that's really what this book is all about.\n\nNext, however, we turn to the question of what happiness really is, not just in one's career, but in one's life more generally. To become a happy lawyer it helps first to understand what makes a happy person. The answer turns out to be pretty complicated, involving a mix of genetics, circumstances, and our own choices.\n\n## **CHAPTER 2\n\nHappiness: A Primer**\n\nIT'S EASIER TO BECOME A HAPPY LAWYER IF YOU ARE already a happy person. We're not all that lucky, and you might be wondering why. Before exploring how to achieve happiness and meaning in a career, we consider in this chapter how to achieve a happy and meaningful life. We offer a brief survey of the scientific literature on the general question of happiness, leaving for the rest of the book the question of finding happiness within the practice of law.\n\nThe literature on happiness is voluminous and often contradictory, with more than 4,000 books published on the subject in 2008 alone, and runs the gamut from first-rate science to garden-variety self-help vacuity. We've done the hard work for you and read at least the best of it. Here's what we think you should know about happiness.\n\n### THREE MEANINGS OF HAPPINESS\n\n\"Happiness\" is one of those chameleon words whose color depends upon where you find it. It has a bright hue for the lawyer on the golf course, dance floor, neighborhood tavern, or ice cream shop. It has a different tone, somewhat paler usually, in a law office. You might be happy, yes, but the feeling is less intensely positive. Finally, \"happiness\" looks altogether different to the lawyer looking back at a career\u2014the happy times and not-so happy times merge in memory and, in the well-spent life, become a sort of soft glow.\n\nAs a concept, \"happiness\" really does triple duty and thus confuses our quest to achieve it. The fact is that maximizing one type of happiness, the giggles and pleasures of the present, might make it more difficult to achieve another type of happiness, the sense of satisfaction that comes later in life with a feeling that however hard life has been at times, you've come close to realizing your potential. In between these two types of happiness, short-term joy and the well-lived life, is an intermediate sort of happiness\u2014a variety we might also call contentment or satisfaction\u2014that is probably the type most relevant to you.\n\nAlthough intermediate-term happiness might be our primary goal, none among us would wish a life without its moments of pure joy (and maybe even a dash of ecstasy). Indeed, a life bereft of joyful moments hardly seems a strong candidate for satisfaction or contentment either. In this chapter, we lay out what researchers really know about achieving happiness in general before turning to what they can tell us about short-term pleasure and intermediate-term satisfaction. We leave for a later chapter some reflections on self-realization, or what it means to have lived life well.\n\n### SUDDENLY, STUDYING HAPPINESS IS IN\n\nGood lawyers understand the importance of facts. In the end, you cannot get around them. As John Adams said during his defense of British soldiers in the Boston Massacre trial, \"Facts are stubborn things.\" The facts about happiness\u2014and some of them are especially stubborn\u2014determine and limit our abilities to achieve greater satisfaction in our legal careers.\n\nAnd there are a great many facts. More pile up each day, with researchers competing for space in _The Journal of Happiness Studies_ or sending abstracts off to the Netherlands, home of the _World Database of Happiness_. Serious students of happiness are busy adding new bookshelves to their libraries or are seeking positions at the University of Pennsylvania's Authentic Happiness Center. It didn't always used to be this way.\n\nA couple of decades ago, this chapter on the science of happiness would have been briefer because, until recently, scientists generally ignored the subject. They considered it nearly impossible to evaluate and resistant to scientific methods. Definitional issues (\"What exactly is happiness anyway?\") and a sense that the whole subject, despite its obvious interest to nearly everyone, was unworthy of serious study added to the reluctance of scientific community to take up the cause. Until recently, the people talking about happiness were mostly pastors and self-help speakers, such as Reverend Rick Warren ( _The Purpose Driven Life_ ) and Norman Vincent Peale ( _The Power of Positive Thinking_ ).\n\nWhen the misgivings of researchers gave way, they really gave way. Now we are inundated with studies from numerous fields exploring this or that aspect of happiness. Happiness studies in the psychological and biological sciences generally are coming from three different, but related, fields. Neuroscientists, using new technology, study brain chemistry and evaluate how various firing patterns of brain cells are associated with happiness or other emotional states. Evolutionary psychologists develop and promote their theories as to how the reproductive advantages and disadvantages of different emotional reactions to events molded the brains of early humans and shaped the patterns of happiness and unhappiness we see today. Finally, members of the fast-growing field of \"positive psychology\" (encompassing cognitive and social psychology) use surveys and other research tools to explore everything from the genetics of happiness to what role geography, relationships, or careers play in determining happiness levels. Taken together, the lessons offered from these three fields of research give us a rich understanding of what happiness is, and what it takes to get there.\n\n### TRANSIENT HAPPINESS\n\nNeuroscientists and evolutionary psychologists generally have focused their research on transient states of happiness ranging from pleasure to exhilaration to euphoria. For neuroscientists, the reason is obvious: it's a lot easier to measure and observe brain changes in reaction to specific stimuli than it is to track changes in brain patterns over long periods of time and then try to explain them in anything resembling scientific terms. A neuroscientist can see what waving a one hundred dollar bill in front of our eyes does to our brains, but cannot conclude much about what ten years of practicing corporate law does for our happiness. Similarly, theories of evolutionary psychology offer little in the way of explanations for longer term satisfaction but instead provide insights into why sex or competitive success brings us pleasure.\n\n#### WHAT EVOLUTIONARY PSYCHOLOGY TEACHES US\n\nEvolutionary psychology tells us why we have emotions in the first place, as well as why we have the ones we do. As evolutionary psychologist David Buss explains it, \"Mechanisms of the mind are end products of a selective process, a sieve through which features passed that contributed to reproductive success.\"\n\nNature cares not for our happiness. From an evolutionary standpoint, being in a persistent state of contentment would not be a recipe for reproductive success; that is, it is more important to have a brain that sends out the message \"Danger!\" than to have one that says \"Be happy.\" Early humans who ignored poisonous snakes and saber-toothed tigers weren't around long enough to pass their genes on to future generations. As a result, nature has programmed us to better recognize the negative than the positive. When we see our mate sneaking off into a cave with another member of our tribe, we're designed to feel jealous or angry, not content. Humans whose genes might have predisposed them to stop and smell the roses when they should have been gathering berries and firewood for the harsh winter ahead left us little of their genetic heritage.\n\nOf course, it is also true that any early human who never took the time to eat or have sex would make no contribution to the gene pool, so it should come as no surprise that two of the activities most likely to cause our brains to send the \"okay, you're happy now\" message are eating and having sex. Evolutionary calculations are all about mate-finding and survival, not about achieving bliss or contentment. Most of what modern humans do with the bulk of their time has little to do with evolutionary biology. Drafting contracts just wasn't part of everyday life on the ancestral savannah, and nothing in our genetic programming is designed to turn on a happy button when we spend our time fine-tuning paragraph 17 on page 4 of a brief.\n\nReproductive success has been facilitated by having a variety of emotional responses, some positive but many negative. The ability to experience fright kept our ancestors from being eaten by lions or battered by invaders. The ability to experience envy or jealousy or sadness kept them searching for positions in their social group that would provide food, sex, and shelter. Pleasure had its place in primitive times, but it was only one of many emotions adapted to be triggered only under certain conditions. Evolution has made it impossible for us to maintain a constant state of happiness\u2014the best we can hope for is to grab more of it than we presently do.\n\n#### WHAT NEUROSCIENCE TEACHES US ABOUT OUR THREE BRAINS\n\nEvolution has left humans with three brains. The most primitive part of our brain is the brainstem, sometimes called the \"reptilian brain\" because its origins trace back that far in our evolutionary history. The brainstem controls heartbeat, respiration, body temperature, and other essential functions. The next part of our brain to develop was the limbic system, sometimes called the \"mammalian brain\" because it emerged more than one hundred million years ago at the beginning of the mammalian era and is something we share with other mammals, from rats to hippopotamuses. The limbic brain includes three main structures: the amygdala, the hippocampus, and the hypothalamus. The limbic brain is the source of our basic emotions, including love, fear, rage, jealousy, and\u2014yes\u2014happiness (at least of the transient variety). Our unconscious value judgments also are primarily the limbic brain's doing. Finally, the arrival of primates resulted in the construction on top of the brain stem and limbic system of a \"third brain\": the neocortex, where intellect and logic reside. The highly flexible neocortex, divided into a left and a right hemisphere, is the source of language, abstract thought, imagination, and consciousness. All three brains co-inhabit our skulls and, in the well-balanced individual, work in a sort of rough harmony with help from neural pathways that connect the limbic system to the neocortex.\n\nThe amygdala, part of our ancient limbic brain, plays a critical role in our emotional lives. When, for example, the amygdala is sending out \"be scared\" messages or \"be jealous\" messages, it is impossible to be happy. Many more neural circuits run from this manager of emotions to the prefrontal cortex, the section of the brain in charge of planning and reasoning, than run toward it. Without the amygdala and its constant emotional reporting to the prefrontal cortex, we would be unable to make decisions. The prefrontal cortex, confronted with an overload of information, ultimately relies on the amygdala to move us from inaction to action. We are, at bottom, and to the disappointment of some, still much more emotional creatures than we are intellectual creatures. Eduardo Punset, a Spanish lawyer, professor of neuroscience, and author of _The Happiness Trip: A Scientific Journey_ , bluntly describes the challenge presented by our evolutionary legacy: \"the problem with the search for happiness\" is \"despite our ardent wishes, we are anchored in a world of genetics and volatile, preset emotions.\"\n\nWith CAT scans and other brain-imaging and monitoring tools, neuroscientists have begun to learn what is going on inside brains that are experiencing transient states of happiness. A study of the brains of dogs being shown food, for example, revealed firing in the hypothalamus, which might be called the \"seeking circuit\" of the brain. Interestingly, researchers observed, the hypothalamus ceases firing as soon as a dog begins eating the food. (This probably comes as no revelation to many dog owners, who might have noticed that dogs wag their tails when they are expecting food but not during the act of eating itself.) This study suggests that happiness might often lie more in anticipation of events than in the actual event itself. Or, as Punset says, \"Happiness is hidden in the waiting room for happiness.\"\n\nResearch reveals that positive emotions are associated with high levels of brain activity in the left frontal cortex, while negative emotions are associated with active firing in the right frontal cortex. If the \"blue bird of happiness\" has a favorite roosting place, it is in the left prefrontal cortex. When subjects experience high levels of anger, depression, or anxiety, the area of the right prefrontal cortex (just behind the forehead) goes into overdrive. Watching an amusing movie clip produces enhanced brain activity in the left frontal cortex of test subjects, while a sad movie caused increased activity in the right. Interestingly, this is even true for babies.\n\nOf course, researchers peering into our brains are not actually _seeing_ happiness, which is a feeling and therefore lacks physical attributes. Neuroscientists cannot be confident that the same brain scan pattern produces the same _intensity_ of happiness in all subjects. Harvard University psychologist Jerome Kagan reminds us that a brain scan \"is no more equivalent to an emotion than a picture of an apple represents the texture and taste of the fruit.\" Ultimately, all claims of happiness come from the closed closet of an individual's point of view.\n\n#### THE SCIENCE OF PLEASURE: A CHEMISTRY LESSON\n\nUnderstanding transient emotions turns out to be a chemistry lesson as much as anything. Although the number of brain chemicals having effects on emotions is large, four in particular are worth mentioning here.\n\nCortisol, to oversimplify, is the stress chemical. When this hormone is coursing through the brain in significant quantities, we can't be happy. We are, instead, frightened or angry or jealous, just as we were designed to be in frightening or anger- or jealousy-inducing situations. Cortisol might not make us happy, but it has adaptive benefits, and even if we could somehow drain it from our systems entirely, we'd be better advised not to. Nonetheless, according to Richard Davidson of the University of Washington, the brain of a generally happy person is one with an \"adaptive pattern of cortisol release\" that allows effective regulation of the negative emotions we all experience from time to time. Davidson's research shows that cortisol levels are naturally lower at night than in the morning and that happier people tend to have lower nighttime levels of cortisol than do less happy people.\n\nIf cortisol causes stress, is there another substance in our brains that might be a \"happy juice\"? Things aren't quite so simple, it turns out. Various chemicals, including the neurotransmitters dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin, play roles in producing good feelings, but each does many other things as well, and not all of those things make us happy.\n\nDopamine is the compact molecule, made of twenty-two atoms, that gets the most attention from researchers\u2014and deservedly so. When we anticipate a pleasurable event, dopamine flows along a specialized circuit of neurons above the brain. It is the _expectation_ of pleasure, not the pleasure itself, triggering the flow. Dopamine is a key component of the motivation system that nature has built in to reward us for searching for the food and sex critical to our reproductive success and survival as a species. It's also been called the brain's \"get-a-load-of-this device,\" the source of our attraction to the novel.\n\nDopamine is critical for our survival as a species, and it has the side benefit of producing boosts in moods and alertness. To call it a source of happiness, however, is misleading. The neurotransmitter is really all about survival, and dopamine neurons fire just as hard at the sight of an object we fear (a snake) as one that excites us in a positive way (a naked lover). Dopamine's goal is to keep us alive and produce offspring, and that means making us pay attention to threats as well as getting us to enjoy food highs and good sex.\n\nDopamine also is blamed for our addictions. As complex as the causes of addiction are, one aspect that they all share is dopamine. Addictions, from drugs to pornography to gambling, can be tied to this \"craving\" neurochemical. Dopamine, in effect, tells us to pay attention to whatever promises us short-term pleasure and to ignore whether our behavior might lead to longer term problems. Call it a design flaw, but our limbic systems are just not built to alert us when we're experiencing too much of a good thing.\n\nDopamine, as we said, is associated with sex\u2014and sex is an activity associated with happiness. Most people would rather not be asked as the moment of sexual climax approaches, but if they were, they would almost universally report being happy. In fact, sex is the activity that produces the highest average ratings of happiness among all activities measured in a recent survey. (Respondents gave sex an average ranking of 4.7 on a 5.0 scale, compared to a 3.8 for eating and a 2.7 for working.) So what is going on in our brains when we engage in sexual activity? In anticipation of sex, dopamine levels soar. Orgasm has been described as \"the biggest blast of dopamine (legally) available to us.\" Brain scans of people experiencing orgasm closely resemble scans of people experiencing heroin rushes. Alas, the happiness from sex is short-lived. After climax, dopamine levels drop off dramatically and the levels of neurochemical prolactin (telling us \"Whoa!\" and then asking us whether it's time for sleep) rise.\n\nStimulants also produce happiness boosts because they increase dopamine levels. Cocaine and amphetamines, for example, provide short-term pleasure by essentially hijacking the neural system for a joyride that evolution never intended. Cocaine works by blocking the dopamine transporter, \"a kind of janitor that picks up the used dopamine molecules and sweeps them back into the cells where they were born.\" With the transporter blocked, dopamine keeps banging its signals. Caffeine has a similar, if much milder, effect. That morning cup of joe increases dopamine flow and produces a short-term mood boost, but heavy caffeine consumption can also cause increased levels of aggression, anxiety, and sleep loss.\n\nMusic can make us happy\u2014even euphoric. Is the reason, as with sex and drugs, linked to dopamine levels in some way? The answer turns out to be \"yes.\" Neuroscientists have discovered that music increases dopamine flow (as well as levels of endorphins and oxytocin) and creates activity in the amygdala and prefrontal cortex. Harvard University psychologist Steven Pinker describes \"the direct effect of music\" as \"simply, the generation of meaningless pleasure.\"\n\nSex, drugs, and rock and roll are three happiness-producing activities associated with dopamine flows\u2014and the list could be made much longer. More generally, dopamine accounts for the pleasure we derive from new and stimulating environments. If variety is the spice of life, dopamine explains why.\n\nPracticing law generally is not associated with increased dopamine levels, but practice areas with surprises and novelty provide more frequent boosts than jobs where one day at the office is virtually the same as any other. Almost all lawyers, however, have the opportunity to inject a bit of variety into their days\u2014perhaps by checking out that new restaurant down the street or striking up a conversation with the new associate down the hall\u2014to perhaps get the dopamine flowing a bit. Laughter can have the same effect\u2014getting to know your office comedian can have its benefits.\n\nDopamine is responsible for our highest highs, but it is serotonin\u2014or rather, the lack thereof\u2014that is associated with our lowest lows. Research shows a clear link between low levels of serotonin and elevated rates of serious depression and anxiety disorders. Prozac, Zoloft, and other antidepressants work by steeping neurons longer in what little serotonin a depressed individual is able to produce, thus improving mood. When our levels of the critical neurotransmitter go up, we feel (depending on the situation) more empathetic, insightful, and uninhibited. For these reasons, serotonin is sometimes called \"the happy chemical\"\u2014a simplistic view that has been undermined by recent research showing that increased serotonin activity and pleasurable feelings do not always go hand in hand.\n\nThere are ways, both legal and illegal, to raise your serotonin levels. Falling in love does the trick. So does enjoying an intimate conversation with a good friend. Natural sunlight also increases serotonin turnover and, if you're stuck in Seattle in January, bright light therapy has the same effect. If you're more desperate, acupuncture seems also to increase serotonin. And if you're more desperate still for a serotonin rush, and won't let the law stand in your way, there's the recreational drug Ecstasy (MDMA). (While Ecstasy typically produces a relaxed and empathetic state, unfortunately for users of the party drug, the rapid deployment of serotonin results in a depletion of serotonin levels once the drug wears off, tumbling the user into a short-term depressed state).\n\nFinally, to complete our brief survey of the brain's emotion-regulating chemistry set, a word about the hormone oxytocin. Oxytocin is sometimes called \"the bonding chemical\" because it is closely associated with the deep connections of lovers or of mothers and babies. During sex, the hormone is released by both men and women, explaining the deep bonding often associated with that experience. Oxytocin is also released during childbirth and flows in a mother at the sound or sight of her young baby, triggering the release of breast milk. When the release of oxytocin is blocked, bad things happen. Experiments show, for example, that sheep and rats will reject their own young. (On the other hand, injecting oxytocin into a female rat causes her to bond with whatever other female rat's young might be nearby, protecting them just as if they were her own.)\n\nRecent evidence, however, indicates that oxytocin plays a far more extensive role than previously thought. According to Dr. C. Sue Carter of the University of Illinois, the hormone is suddenly \"very hot.\" Scientists have demonstrated, as Natalie Angier concludes in a recent summary of the research in the _New York Times_ , that oxytocin does nothing less than underlie \"the twin emotional pillars of civilized life, our capacity to feel empathy and trust.\" She cites a Swiss study finding that subjects given a nasal squirt of oxytocin were far more likely to trust strangers with their money than were subjects given a squirt of a placebo solution. A second study compared two groups of people, one group with a genetic code that made their oxytocin receptors more responsive to the effects of the hormone, and one group without that genetic variant. The study found that having the gene that increased responsiveness to oxytocin resulted in an improved ability to read faces, feel distress at another's hardship, and identify with characters in a novel. The enhanced receptor also made people less stress-prone. The results of the study left Dr. Sarina Rodriquez of the University of Oregon \"floored.\"\n\nDoes understanding the chemistry behind transient happiness make us better equipped to find it? We cannot change the chemistry sets our brains came equipped with, but if we know what activities and substances produce brain responses associated with pleasure, we are better able to obtain happiness boosts when we really need them. While some of the lessons of neuroscience reach beyond pleasure to what we've called satisfaction or contentment, the scientific research suggests that happiness is more easily achieved for the short-term than the longer term. There is no magic bean for contentment.\n\n#### THE SCIENCE OF SATISFACTION: TWO THINGS THAT WORK\n\nWhile temporarily increasing or decreasing the flow of various brain chemicals can bring about moments of pleasure, it does little to increase our intermediate-term happiness. To achieve happiness that stays with us for weeks rather than minutes or hours, it's not a simple matter of turning on this or that neurotransmitter faucet. Rather, the structures and the pathways of the brain need to be reshaped. An impressive body of growing evidence suggests two ways that can be done and produce long-lasting improvements in mood.\n\nThe first proven technique for increasing activity in the left prefrontal cortex is meditation. If you are inclined to dismiss mindfulness meditation as some sort of New Age mumbo-jumbo, you will have to ignore a number of studies that show meditation programs of eight-weeks or less reduce anxiety and depression, while increasing well-being and immune system responses. Most persons practicing regular meditation also report an enhanced ability to experience the present moment. Neuroscientists confirm that meditation and bio-feedback techniques can reprogram brains and re-direct brain activity from the right to left prefrontal cortex. As neuroscientist Richard Davidson puts it, happiness can be thought of \"as a skill, not fundamentally different than learning to play the violin or learning to play golf.\"\n\nOur second recommendation for improving moods over the longer term is to exercise. It's even a good idea if you're a rat. Princeton scientists recently discovered that rats that exercise create new brain cells that respond much better to stress than the brain cells of slothful rats. Exercise does nothing less than reshape your brain, making it more stress-resistant. Michael Hopkins, affiliated with Dartmouth's Neurobiology of Learning and Memory Laboratory concludes, \"It looks more and more like the positive stress of exercise prepares structures and pathways within the brain so that they're more equipped to handle stress in other forms.\" Hopkins calls the translation from the realm of the physical to the psychological \"pretty amazing, really.\" Don't expect, however, that thirty minutes on the treadmill will wipe away your problems. According to researchers at the University of Colorado, it seems to take at least three to six weeks of regular exercise to reap the psychological benefits.\n\n#### THE SLOPPY BUSINESS OF MEASURING SATISFACTION\n\nWhile researchers interested in the transient type of happiness can peer into brains or speculate about adaptation in early humans, they lack a tool that can objectively measure and compare the pleasure of one person to another. There is no \"hedonometer\" that can accurately measure how many \"hedons\" of happiness you are experiencing at the present moment and show for certain that it is more or less than the person sitting next to you. For a measure of how much pleasure a person is presently experiencing, researchers have to rely on self-reports of subjects (\"How happy are you feeling right now\u2014very happy, happy, indifferent, unhappy, or very unhappy?\").\n\nStudies of (the ultimately more important) intermediate-term happiness, such as measures of career or marital satisfaction, generally depend on self-reporting. Self-reporting is subject to variation over time and culture. For example, most studies suggest that the Japanese are generally less happy than Americans, but there is some reason to question that finding. It is difficult to determine how much the difference in reports of satisfaction might be attributable to the greater emphasis Western culture places on happiness. Because of that emphasis, it is possible that Americans might feel psychologically compelled to report higher happiness levels than do residents of Japan, who place a higher value on harmony and obligations. This could explain why moment-by-moment reporting (our make-do hedonometer) indicates that Asians and Americans have similar overall levels of transient happiness.\n\nThe vast majority of people (about 85 percent) claim above average satisfaction with their lives. \"Claiming that you're happy\u2014that is to an interviewer who is asking you to rate your life satisfaction on a scale from zero to ten\u2014appears to be nearly universal, as long as you're not living in a war zone, on the street, or in extreme emotional or physical pain.\" Are people really as happy as they say they are? Probably not. More likely, reported levels of satisfaction are skewed by the desire of people to \"manage impressions.\" An admission of unhappiness could be perceived today by many Americans as a sense of failure.\n\nAny measure of happiness is imperfect. Yet that is no reason not to study it, nor to draw lessons from those that have. As political scientist Alan Wolfe noted, \"The proper question... is which of the many imperfect measures of happiness we ought to rely on.\"\n\n#### THE THREE COMPONENTS OF SATISFACTION\n\nSatisfaction, or intermediate-term happiness, is determined by three things: genetics, circumstances, and our own internal decisions and actions. Our focus for most of this book will be on the third factor, those choices you can make to increase your own job and life satisfaction regardless of your genes or specific circumstances. Yet it is important to understand that happiness is not completely within your control. Understanding and accepting limitations on your satisfaction may actually prove helpful to your efforts to boost your own happiness. We are reminded of the wise words of theologian Reinhold Niebuhr's \"Serenity Prayer\":\n\nGod grant me the serenity  \nto accept the things I cannot change;  \ncourage to change the things I can;  \nand wisdom to know the difference.\n\n##### _Genetics: The Stubborn Reality of Happiness Set Points_\n\nThe most important insight about the nature of happiness that science has given to us is that, to a surprisingly large extent, our happiness levels are genetically determined. Genetics isn't fate\u2014how genes express themselves is not inevitable\u2014but genes provide strong behavioral momentum. Estimates as to the genetic contribution to happiness levels vary considerably (from about 40 percent to 80 percent), but nearly everyone recognizes the contribution to be substantial. The seminal study was a twin study conducted by David Lykken and Auke Tellegen. The two researchers asked pairs of identical twins to report on their happiness levels on two occasions nine years apart. They found that happiness levels reported on the first occasion predicted, to a large degree, happiness levels reported nine years later. In other words, they found happiness levels to be remarkably consistent over time. Second, and even more surprising, Lykken and Tellegen discovered that the happiness level of one twin could predict the happiness level of the other twin nine years later just as well as that twin's _own_ earlier happiness level. This turned out to be true even if the identical twins were separated at birth and raised in very different circumstances. The researchers concluded that inherited factors play large roles in shaping our perceived levels of happiness, much larger than the environments in which we live. The label that has been given to this genetic component of our happiness level is our happiness \"set point.\"\n\nYour happiness set point is the baseline level of happiness to which you _tend_ to return after periods of either unusual positive (falling in love, enjoying a dream vacation) or negative (getting fired, breaking a leg) emotion. We all know people who seem to keep a smile on their face even when circumstances would suggest otherwise. We know others for whom almost every day seems like a bleak Monday in November. When it comes to happiness, the genetic lottery produces both winners and losers. Happiness researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky puts it this way: \"[L]ike genes for intelligence or cholesterol, the magnitude of innate set points\u2014that is, whether it is high (a six on a seven-point scale) or low (a two) or in between (a four)\u2014governs to a large extent how happy we will be over the course of our lives.\" Lyubomirsky estimates that happiness levels are 50 percent determined by genetics, putting her squarely in the mainstream of happiness researchers. Regardless of your set point, as we discuss later, you still have a great deal of control over your own feelings of happiness.\n\nVarious personality traits have been linked to higher or lower happiness set points. People who are extroverted, optimistic, and take risks, for example, tend to be relatively happy. On the other hand, introverted, pessimistic, risk-averse people tend to be relatively unhappy. The least happy people of all, unsurprisingly, tend to be people who take worry and anxiety to a whole different level: neurotics.\n\nThe traits associated with higher or lower set points are not truly independent. Extroverts, for example, in addition to being sociable tend to take more risks, whether the risks involves sports such as downhill skiing, or behaviors such as excessive drinking and having multiple sex partners. In general, extroverts find more shops enticing than do introverts as both groups meander through the bazaar that is life.\n\nAlthough extroverts outnumber introverts by a three-to-one margin in the general U.S. population, there are more introverted than extroverted lawyers. According to a study of more than 3,000 lawyers, introverts outnumber extroverts by a 57 percent to 43 percent margin. The difference in ratios between the general population and population of lawyers is dramatic and suggests two things. First, the practice of law is a career that disproportionately appeals to introverts. As Michael Melcher notes in _The Creative Lawyer._ \"Introvert characteristics are more apt to be accepted and appreciated in the field of law than in the rest of the world.\" The work environments of lawyers are typically quiet, private, and place a premium on contemplation, preparation, and writing skills. (Trial lawyers, of course, rely more heavily on skills better suited for extroverts, such as face-to-face meetings and courtroom speech-making.)\n\nThe American Bar Association survey results suggest that when it comes to achieving happiness, most lawyers have one strike against them, their introversion, and other research suggests a second strike: pessimism. Psychologist Martin Seligman describes pessimism as \"a well-documented... major risk factor for unhappiness,\" and notes there is \"a surprising correlation between pessimism and success in law school.\" This correlation appears to be because a pessimist finds it much easier to conjure up the worst-case scenarios that it is a lawyer's job to guard against, whether in writing contracts or defending a client in court. Pessimism, in short, has a positive dimension that we often refer to as \"prudence.\" By spotting pitfalls ahead, the prudent lawyer brings clients safely into a happy harbor when a more optimistic sort might have left the client marooned by an unanticipated disaster. As helpful as this honed pessimism might be in the actual practice of law, it doesn't make for a happy worker in the office.\n\n##### _Circumstances: The 10 Percent Determinant of Happiness Levels_\n\n_Happiness depends, as Nature shows,  \nLess on exterior things than most suppose._\n\n\u2014William Cowper (1782)\n\nWhen asked to imagine a happy person, most people immediately put that person in fortunate circumstances. They imagine a person cruising around the Mediterranean on a yacht with her lover. They picture a fabulously wealthy person with power and fame to spare. Always, the persons imagined are healthy, good-looking, and well-short of old age. The reality of happy people is much different.\n\nAs we hope our discussion of set points has convinced you, circumstances have a lot less to do with our happiness levels than most people think. What is most surprising, however, is how little circumstances affect happiness at all. Millionaires are not much happier than middle-income folks. People in their twenties are no happier than people in their sixties. Men are about as happy as women, although women have a wider emotional range. Achieving fame barely moves the happiness register. In general, circumstances as a whole account for only about 10 percent of the difference in happiness levels.\n\nNor is well-being significantly affected by where you live in the United States. When the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) asked 1.3 million Americans between 2005 and 2008, \"In general, how satisfied are you with your life?,\" it turned out that residents in the happiest and least happy states differed by only one-tenth of a point on a 4-point happiness scale. Nonetheless, the CDC study provided plenty of fodder for researchers who offered their interpretations of the tiny differences. While the data suggested that residents of western states are, on the whole, slightly happier than residents of other states (the merriest five, in order, were Utah, Hawaii, Wyoming, Colorado, and Minnesota), when two researchers controlled for factors such as income, marital status, and age, they found that residents of southern states came out on top. In their study reported in the December 2009 issue of _Science_ online, economists Andrew J. Oswald of the University of Warwick and Stephen Wu of Hamilton College in New York concluded that the states that made people happiest were actually (generally poorer) southern states, with Louisiana, Hawaii, Florida, Tennessee, and Arizona ranking best using their methodology. Mississippians, for example, who ranked 48th in satisfaction in the raw averages, came in at an impressive number 7 on the satisfaction scale after Oswald and Wu made their statistical adjustments. Typically, the media overplays rankings of these sorts and readers are rarely informed as to how very modest the state-by-state differences actually are.\n\nNonetheless, there are a few circumstances that account for significant differences in reported levels of happiness. One of these is belonging to a church. People who describe themselves as \"very religious\" or \"religious\" are happier than those who don't. Why religious people are happier than their more secular brethren is somewhat of an open question. One theory is that religion gives the believer a sense of purpose and optimism about the future. A second possibility is that members within religious communities often develop deep bonds, and it is these relationships rather than the religious beliefs that account for the happiness boost. Finally, it is possible that the type of people who gravitate to religions tend to be happier people in the first place, rather than the religion making them happier. A secular person could say on Tuesday, \"I'll become religious as of today and get happier,\" but that is not a leap of faith most people could make even if they wanted to. (Interestingly, Ruut Veenhoven, director of the World Database of Happiness, reports that hedonists appear to be somewhat happier than nonhedonists. What this says about the higher levels of happiness reported by churchgoers is not clear. At the very least Veenhoven's finding suggests abstinence is not the answer to everything.)\n\nEnjoying a number of close relationships also makes people happier. This is one of those happiness determinants with both a circumstantial and intentional aspect to it, so it's hard to know exactly how to categorize it. We are social animals and interaction with others usually (we all have personal knowledge of many exceptions) makes us happy. Measured on a 5-point scale, with 5 being ecstatically happy, people report average happiness levels of 3.7 when they are interacting with friends, 3.3 to 3.4 when they are interacting with spouses or children, and 2.8 at times when they are interacting with clients or co-workers. By comparison, hanging out alone produces an average happiness rating of 2.7, although that's still better than time with the boss, which comes in at only 2.4.\n\nWhile married people are only slightly happier than single people, it is clear that ending a close relationship can have devastating short-term consequences for happiness levels. People going through a divorce are generally unhappy. Over time, most people get over the loss and move back toward their set points. Having intimate relationships appears to be a basic human need, and people who lack them rarely are as happy as those who have them. Moreover, the more such close friendships a person has, the happier he or she will be.\n\nOur social nature is reflected in recent studies that show happiness is contagious. In a study of nearly 5,000 residents of a Boston suburb, researchers examined how a sense of happiness moved through various social networks to which the study subjects belonged, including friends, family, neighbors, and co-workers. The study showed that happy people tend to cluster together and that happy people occupied the center of social networks. By contrast, researchers found unhappy people stranded on the periphery of networks, plugged into the center by only a few social lines. Neither of these results should surprise anyone. More interesting, however, was the conclusion that happiness is transmitted though social networks, weakening as it spreads out over the chain of relationships. For example, if Ann becomes happy and is a friend of Barb, then Barb is about 15 percent more likely to become happy herself; if Barb is a friend with Carol, Carol is about 10 percent more likely to benefit from spillover happiness that starts with Ann. Friends, the study suggested, are better transmitters of happiness than family, and family better transmitters than co-workers. The study found geographical distance key to the effectiveness of the transmission, with transmission most effective for friends living less than a half mile apart.\n\nWealth is the most overrated of all factors in people's guesses as to what will improve their happiness. Asked what single thing would be most likely to make them happier, a majority of Americans answer \"more money.\" Almost three-quarters of college freshmen in a recent survey said it was important to be \"very well off financially.\" Harvard University psychology professor Daniel Gilbert sums up the situation this way: \"'[W]e think money will bring lots of happiness for a long time, and it actually brings a little happiness for a short time.'\"\n\nWhat is true is that rich people are somewhat happier than poor people. About 45 percent of the wealthiest quarter of Americans describes themselves as \"very happy\" compared to 33 percent of the poorest quarter of Americans who describe themselves that way. (Still, 86 percent of the poorest Americans call themselves at least \"quite happy.\") Beyond lower-middle-income levels, however, increases in wealth give only the tiniest of happiness boosts. Some satisfaction seems to come from belonging to a higher social class, probably because membership in the higher class correlates with an increased likelihood of feeling of having \"control over life.\"\n\nAlthough geography makes little difference in happiness levels among Americans, it is worth noting that significant differences do appear when comparing citizens of different countries. Many factors, including standard of living and degree of individual freedom, seem to affect happiness differences among nations, yet no factor plays a bigger role than the level of trust people have in their government institutions and fellow citizens. Citizens of Denmark, a country where residents have a very high level of trust in their government, are much happier than citizens of Moldova, who think very poorly of their government. A map of world happiness shows high rates of happiness in the most democratic of nations, from Western Europe through the United States and Canada to Australia and New Zealand. On the other hand, the most autocratic of the old Soviet bloc countries, such as Belarus and Ukraine, as well as the governmentally challenged nations of Africa, tend to be home to the least happy of citizens.\n\nTrust in general seems a key component of happiness. The relationships that provide the biggest happiness boost are ones that are built on trust. Communities where residents trust each other are far happier than communities where they don't. Researchers dropped wallets on the streets of cities around the world. The wallets contained the name and address of a supposed owner. The nations with the highest return rate of wallets, such as Scandinavian countries, also turned out to be at the top of the happiness charts. The study showed a high correlation between return rates, a plausible measure of trust within a society, and happiness.\n\nUltimately, the circumstances that have the biggest effects on happiness are family relationships, employment status, health, and quality of government. Of these, the biggest drags on happiness are being recently separated (which makes a person less happy than either being divorced or never married), losing a job (almost, but not quite, as bad as separation), being in seriously bad health, and having the misfortune of growing up in a country such as Moldova. For people in these circumstances, their situation is a serious impediment to happiness. But for most people, all these situational differences hardly amount to a hill of beans on the hike up happy mountain.\n\n##### _Adaptation: Life on the Hedonic Treadmill_\n\nEven if circumstances matter little, a sudden change in circumstances might affect happiness levels\u2014at least for a brief time. When it comes to measuring our happiness, one thing we all know is that it's not a flat line. Some days (or moments) we're feeling relatively up, and then the next day (or moment), we're down in the dumps. Happiness set points don't determine our day-to-day levels of happiness; rather they are a measure of the happiness level we tend to gravitate back to over time. Our day-to-day, moment-to-moment happiness levels are strongly influenced by our circumstances and intentional activity, as we'll discuss below.\n\nThe tendency of our happiness levels to drift back toward our set points from our fluctuating highs and lows is called _adaptation_ , or life on \"the hedonic treadmill.\" If we get that hoped-for promotion, marry our sweetheart, or win the lottery, we will undoubtedly become happier in the short-term, but at some point in the future (be it days or months) we'll start moving back toward our set point. The same goes for negative experiences. If we get fired, end a relationship, or lose our fortune in a bear market, we'll undoubtedly experience some short-term unhappiness (or even depression), but the vast majority of us will see our happiness levels rise back in the long-term to near the point that they were before our misfortune. In general, events that we think will make us happy forever and ever (as the fairy tales suggest) rarely do, and even the most devastating of life's blows seldom leave us emotionally crippled for life. That is not to say, however, that there are not some circumstances to which we will never fully adapt. For example, chronic pain, life-threatening danger, and high ambient noise levels are all circumstances associated with long-term lower levels of reported happiness. Paraplegics are not as happy as other people. We adapt over time, but sometimes not completely back to where we started. Interestingly, we adapt less to minor annoyances and small pleasures than to more significant events. That too-long wait at work for the elevator grates every day because the negative experience is insufficient to trigger a response from \"our psychological immune system.\" Because adaptation is not well understood, you are likely to overestimate the amount of happiness that a positive events will bring you\u2014just as you underestimate your own ability to recover from one of life's many setbacks.\n\nAs it happens, people also generally do a rather poor job of predicting future levels of happiness. Most people (although not so much lawyers) have a bias toward optimism that causes them to overestimate future levels of happiness. Asked to predict how happy they will be five years from now, almost three-quarters of people surveyed expect to be happier and only about 5 percent predict that they will be less happy. In fact the best prediction of how happy you will be in five or ten years is precisely how happy you now are. Our mistake? Usually it is in thinking that the future will be more like the present than it actually will be. In our imagined futures, we continue to value the same experiences we do today, and we then adjust our happiness upward based on a few anticipated events, such as having kids, moving into a new home, or landing a sought-after promotion. The reality is that how we value various experiences continues to change over time and that life, almost always, pushes us in unexpected directions.\n\n##### _Internal Factors: The 40 Percent Determinant of Happiness Levels That Is within Your Control_\n\nWith genetics accounting for 50 percent of our happiness, and those circumstances that are largely out of our control a paltry 10 percent, that leaves 40 percent within the power of our own actions and ways of thinking to determine. In other words, well-chosen happiness strategies can boost happiness levels four times more than if somehow the circumstances of life that are largely beyond our control magically were to swing to the ideal. Of course, there is no single silver-bullet solution to improving happiness levels by 40 percent. Rather, the 40 percent figure represents the upper limit of the possible if you adopt all the approaches to improving happiness that happen to be best suited for your own circumstances and personality.\n\nWhat _are_ these happiness strategies that can give our happiness levels powerful boosts? They are many and they are varied.\n\n### GETTING MORE SATISFACTION\n\nThe \"forty-percent solution\" to happiness, focusing on those two-fifths of our overall happiness that we can control, is really the only solution we have. You cannot change the genes you've been dealt, and most of what we've labeled \"circumstances\" are either unchangeable (such as your age or health) or very difficult to change. The potential 40 percent gain in happiness from intentional strategies represents a ceiling, and one that is difficult to reach. Getting a full 40-percent boost might be as unrealistic as going from the ten push-ups you can do now to the hundred you'd like to do. It will involve a lot of focus and even then you might not make it. But if it isn't worth trying to get happier, then what _is_ worth trying?\n\nWe will discuss specific steps lawyers can take to increase career satisfaction in chapter 4, but the rest of your life matters too, so here we offer some strategies that can help boost overall life satisfaction. A happier person is usually also a happier lawyer, so adopting some of these strategies will probably make you feel better about your career, even though careers are not the focus of these strategies.\n\nFor the most part, the strategies we suggest are aimed at increasing satisfaction, not the more transient variety of happiness. Need we remind you, however, that the passing pleasures of life make a contribution to overall life satisfaction? So, in addition to trying out the strategies below, don't forget to treat yourself to life's pleasures. Once in a while, go for that double-fudge ice cream, grab the skis and head for the slopes, or indulge yourself with a Swedish massage.\n\nAnd don't forget the activities known to promote satisfaction, and not just short-term happiness. These activities include exercise, getting adequate and regular sleep\u2014if sleeping can be fairly called \"an activity\"\u2014and meditation. Finding enough hours in a day for exercise, adequate sleep, and meditation can be a challenge for lawyers. We will stress later the importance of a balanced life, but let this be an early warning of the costs associated with a seventy-hour-per-week job. Relax with your favorite guru or yoga instructor and enjoy that voyage of self-discovery.\n\n### BECOMING A THRIVING PERSON\n\n#### THE SIX KEYS TO LIFE SATISFACTION\n\nAcross all cultures, six experiences have been found central to making a person thrive\u2014and a thriving person is generally one who will be satisfied with his or her life. Those experiences are security, autonomy, authenticity, relatedness, competence, and self-esteem. It is within your power to either develop or erode these core elements of a thriving person. If you play your cards right, you'll be happier.\n\nSecurity is the odd duck on the list, in that it is more dependent on external conditions than the other five experiences, and is a prerequisite to a sense of well-being. A fearful, anxious existence is not consistent with thriving. Choices dictated by fear are not choices at all. People do not thrive in war zones when daily fears of bombs landing on their house crowd their minds. Most of us don't live in a war zone, but some of us do live in neighborhoods where security is an everyday concern. Others among us might worry about threats from someone living under our own roof. Still others may feel physically secure but be anxious about health or finances. When sources of deep anxiety are present, life satisfaction becomes impossible. Needless to say, then, anything that can be done to alleviate the anxiety should be done. Can you afford to move to a safer neighborhood? Can a psychologist or medical doctor or financial planner help you confront and control whatever it is that is the source of your insecurity? These feelings can be heavy and are really beyond the scope of this book\u2014but know that without facing these issues first, everything else we can offer will be of little help.\n\nAutonomy is the ability to make your _preferred_ choices and not have them dictated either by fear or imagined or real constraints. Put simply, an autonomous person can do the things he or she wants to do. It should surprise no one that autonomy is central to thriving. When it comes to autonomy, Americans start with an advantage over Belarusians or North Koreans\u2014at least we don't have a government severely constraining our choices. Nonetheless, we all sometimes have our choices limited. We might not have the money to take that dream vacation we want. Or we might have the money, but the demands of work make travel impossible. Or we have the money and the time, but we have an elderly parent whose needs we must care for. We can't always do what we want\u2014so what else is new? Accepting that not every door is open to us is not only part of growing up but is part of becoming a happier person.\n\nIn fact, what is perhaps most worth noting on the issue of autonomy is that our freedom is enhanced, not constricted, when our universe of choices shrinks to a manageable number. More people today suffer from having too many choices than from having too few. Having too many choices can lead to a paralysis that prevents us from making any choice at all or, if we finally do make a choice, can cause us to suffer regret (\"buyer's remorse\") over all of those other possible choices not made. In his wonderfully insightful book, _The Paradox of Choice: Why Less Is More_ , Barry Schwartz shows that people who overanalyze the vast array of choices modern life throws at us are less happy, less optimistic, and more depressed than people who are quicker to say \"good enough\" and make their choices. The overanalyzers, people Schwartz calls \"maximizers,\" pay \"a significant price in terms of personal well-being.\" Choice overload becomes a nightmare for maximizers but not for \"satisficers\" who understand that no choice is likely to be perfect and that the time spent trying to select from a set of reasonably good alternatives can better be spent in more satisfying ways.\n\nAuthenticity is being who you really are. An authentic person makes choices based on his or her true values. Being \"in the closet,\" whether on the issue of sexual orientation or political affiliation or spiritual preference, can be hazardous to your emotional health. When your goals are consistent with your deepest values and not the values someone else chooses for you, your life has a clarity and sense of purpose that makes achieving happiness much more likely. What this means for you and your law career will be a topic for a later chapter, but it probably is obvious to you already that if you're a social conservative, your prospects for career satisfaction aren't enhanced by joining a pornography defense firm. Authenticity, however, isn't just about the big choices, it is about the little ones too. Do you prefer a Budweiser to that Sonoma County pinot noir, but go with the wine because you think your friends will think less of you if you ask for a beer? Does your choice of furniture reflect your taste or that of an interior designer your mother recommended? Almost everyone hides some part of their true self, but the less you do it, the happier you'll become. You can take a step in the direction of authenticity, and in the direction of greater happiness, by identifying the activities that truly make _you_ (and not necessarily anyone else) happier\u2014and then spending more time doing those activities. If your friends leave you because you suddenly start playing volleyball at nudist camps or going to pyramid conventions\u2014well, they probably weren't the best of friends anyway.\n\nThe fourth key to thriving is relatedness, or feeling well-connected to others. People need people. People need to share, need to laugh, need support. Of course, creating deep connections takes time, and it usually involves a process of promise-making and promise-keeping that eventually leads to trust. The good news is that the very steps that can eventually create a close friendship often bring increased satisfaction along the way. Expressing gratitude frequently, for example, is one of the surest ways to increase your own life satisfaction. Forgiving others and moving on also increases satisfaction, while wallowing in and ruminating over past wrongs blocks happiness at the doorway. Acting happy tends to strengthen friendships and, interestingly, makes you happier than you were when you started acting. (Even a simple thing like forming a smile seems to bring a small amount of pleasure to the smiler.) Performing acts of kindness also increases satisfaction, as does joining with friends or relatives to reminisce over past events. We could come up with a much longer list here, but you get the idea.\n\nA fifth experience of the thriving person is a sense of competence. The person who masters challenges or accomplishes a difficult task feels capable, feels valued, and is likely to feel happier. As a lawyer, you have already mastered (more or less) a difficult skill. If you have practiced in a specialized area of law, and your skill is in demand, you probably already feel valued by clients or by colleagues. (If you have that mastery, and no one in your firm seems to give a damn, maybe it's time to get out?) Apart from your legal career, however, competence in other areas such as woodworking or tennis might also give you a happiness boost. In particular, by developing competencies, a person increases their opportunities for activities that thread that happy needle between boredom and anxiety and which are highly correlated with feelings of enhanced well-being.\n\nFinally, a thriving person has self-esteem. This experience, in fact, is so closely tied to satisfaction that the two terms are sometimes thought to be nearly synonymous. A person with self-esteem is satisfied with one's self. Self-esteem has been a large topic for many years, and we won't attempt to plow this field. Suffice it to say, adopting tools that increase self-esteem will also tend to make you happier. These tools include forgiving yourself, trying to imagine an ideal future for yourself, avoiding excessive rumination, and doing the things (such as practicing acts of kindness or meeting a difficult challenge) that could make you feel better about yourself.\n\nHow do you measure up on these six experiences of the thriving person? On a one-to-ten scale, which is your strongest suit and which your weakest? Focusing on these intrinsic (or self-development) goals produces more happiness than focusing on extrinsic goals, such as becoming rich or famous.\n\n#### DO THINGS GO BETTER WITH HAPPINESS?\n\nWe don't seek happiness because it will make us a better spouse or friend or lawyer; we seek happiness because we like being happy. \"People are strongly, perhaps even primarily, perhaps even single-mindedly, motivated to be happy.\" As it turns out, however, happiness is more than its own reward. One of the side benefits of happiness, as we've noted, is that the happy person spreads happiness to others. Happiness also allows us to be more receptive to information, either coming from others or from our environment. It makes us mindful: we see things that we miss when in a sour mood. We become aware of the loveliness of a garden, the sound of the oriole, or the smell from the freshly fallen rain. Just as significantly, we become better at reading the signals that those near us are sending: we become better listeners and become more capable of satisfying the desires of our lovers and our friends. Finally, happiness makes us healthier. It produces better immune systems and makes us more resilient when we suffer setbacks. Happy people live longer than unhappy people.\n\nIn this chapter, we've explored the components of happiness. We've learned that happiness has a significant genetic component, but it also can be strongly influenced by the choices we make and the strategies we adopt. In the next chapter, we will consider what aspects of a life in the law move us toward greater happiness and what aspects tend to pull us away from our goal. It's off to work we go.\n\n## **CHAPTER 3\n\nWhat Makes Lawyers Happy and Unhappy**\n\nWHEN A RESEARCHER AT THE UNIVERSITY OF Chicago's National Opinion Research Center (NORC) analyzed surveys of workers in 198 occupations, he discovered that the clergy ranked at the very top of the list in job satisfaction and roofers ranked at the very bottom. The study did not attempt to determine why the clergy were so happy or roofers so miserable, but what we've learned about the sources of happiness in general gives us some pretty good clues. We'll see where lawyers stand on the happiness scale shortly, but let's start by looking at which occupations are the most and least happy to give us a measuring stick.\n\nThe first thing to note about the clergy is not only are they very satisfied with their work, but they are also unusually happy people. In addition to reporting the highest level of job satisfaction (with 87.2 percent calling themselves \"very satisfied\"), the clergy also reported the highest level of overall personal happiness (with 67.2 percent pronouncing themselves \"very happy\"). These results, of course, raise a \"chicken-or-the-egg\" question: Are the clergy so happy doing what they do because of the nature of the job, or do people who enter seminaries tend to be happier people and then let their personal happiness translate into higher levels of job satisfaction? The answer, it seems, is both: those who join the clergy are happy people and they love their jobs. Happy people tend to look at glasses as being half full and report above average levels of satisfaction across multiple domains, ranging from marital satisfaction to satisfaction with where they live. It is quite likely that the typical seminarian is more purpose-driven, more extroverted, and more focused on relationships (all traits associated with increased levels of happiness) than the average person.\n\nThe evidence is compelling, however, that something in the nature of the work also makes the clergy so spectacularly satisfied compared to other workers. The number of clergy reporting themselves \"very satisfied\" with their work is a full 20 percent higher than the number of clergy calling themselves \"very happy\" in their personal lives. What explains this?\n\nOne factor is undoubtedly that the work of the clergy closely aligns with their own values. They identify paths to eternal life or personal fulfillment, and they then try to guide their flocks along that path. They comfort the afflicted and rail, when they wish, against the evils of the world. Happiness research makes it indisputably clear that people feel better about work when they think they are making a contribution to the public good than when they think their work either has no social value or actually undermines the public good. The clergy have a benefit that lawyers, for the most part, don't enjoy. They can choose to attend a divinity school or seminary that closely reflects their own personal values, whereas law schools, with a few exceptions, generally are not associated with teaching distinctive sets of values.\n\nOther factors help make the clergy so satisfied. Their work involves them in deep and meaningful ways in the lives of others, and deep relationships correlate with higher levels of happiness. Their job affords high measures of control. The clergy are usually free to shape church programs (\"What should be the theme of my sermon this week?\" \"What field trip should we send the youth group on this year?\"). They also have a fair amount of scheduling flexibility and the reasonable prospect of a good work-life balance. The clergy face creative challenges within their realm of competence and frequently interact with people less fortunate than themselves, both job characteristics associated with satisfying careers.\n\nCompare the clergy to our oh-so-miserable roofers: up there, laying asphalt shingles in 100-degree temperatures or 20-degree wind chills and not feeling entirely secure all the while. Probably worse, laying shingles affords almost zero opportunities for creativity\u2014the shingles are laid down in a preset order, and there's no opportunity for the roofer to let loose an inner Van Gogh. Control and personal interaction is limited at best; it's one long hour of tedium after another, often just you and your roof.\n\nJobs that align with values and involve helping others are those that rated at the very top of the NORC study. Following right behind the clergy in job satisfaction were physical therapists, firefighters, and education administrators (deans, principals, and school superintendents). Teachers came in sixth on the list, in-between two jobs offering bushel baskets of opportunities for creativity and personal control, artists and authors.\n\nOn the other hand, at the bottom of the list, just above roofers in reporting low levels of job satisfaction, were waiters, bartenders, packagers, and stock handlers. None of these jobs, with the possible exception of bartending, provides creative challenges or offers workers an opportunity to express their personal values through their work.\n\nGiven what the survey suggests about the most and least satisfying jobs, it should come as no surprise that lawyers rank slightly above the middle of the pack in terms of job satisfaction. Lawyers, with 52.4 percent reporting themselves \"very satisfied,\" are below doctors (57.9 percent satisfied) and in-between occupations such as editors (52.9 percent satisfied) and accountants (49.7 percent satisfied). The jobs that fall between the extremes of satisfaction and dissatisfaction, including the practice of law, are those that score well on some characteristics of satisfying jobs (say, providing challenge), not so well on others (say, allowing control), and in-between on still others (say, opportunities for interaction or alignment of work with values).\n\nLawyers report so-so satisfaction with their careers despite the fact that law is a high paying and prestigious job. Those qualities don't matter very much in terms of job satisfaction. It is also a helping profession, and that is generally a positive indicator of happiness, except that, unlike clergy, lawyers don't see clients at their happiest moments.\n\nAn American Bar Association (ABA) study of how the practice of law matched the expectations that lawyers had when they entered the field is revealing. The study showed that the \"intellectual challenge\" of law practice was by far the aspect of practice that most closely matched expectations. Law is a great field for people who love mental puzzles, and almost everyone in the field seems to know that. Fully 70 percent of lawyers report that the intellectual challenge of law practice \"very well\" matched their expectations. Compare that to what seems to be the great disappointment of lawyers, the failure of their job to contribute as much to the public good as they expected. Only 16 percent of lawyers, according to the survey, found that their jobs afforded the \"ability to contribute to social good\" as much as they had expected. A full quarter of lawyers reported, on this measure, that their expectations were \"not at all\" met in their jobs. Falling in-between these extremes of expectation and reality was \"financial remuneration,\" with 34 percent reporting their compensation \"very well\" matched what they thought it would be, while another 52 percent found that the financial rewards of law practice at least \"somewhat\" matched expectations.\n\nDepending on an attorney's specific job\u2014small firm practitioner in a cultivated niche, in-house counsel with a template of corporate rules, or large firm associate\u2014the attorney will have more or less control. But there are many things lawyers can't control, chief among them other lawyers, deadlines, and billing. According to a 2007 ABA study, 69 percent of lawyer respondents saw \"declining civility\" in their profession, and 90 percent of lawyers in the largest firms found \"competition between firms\" increasing, possibly forcing firms to abandon more traditional professional models in favor of more efficient models (i.e., more emphasis on billable hours and client development and less emphasis on building collegial relationships and doing quality work regardless of cost). Especially telling is the fact that one-half of all lawyers now say that pressure to increase billable hours is a \"very\" or \"somewhat\" important reason that would make them consider leaving a firm. A desire to have more time to spend with friends and family ranks well above the concern to earn more money or to advance within the firm's hierarchy.\n\nThese results clearly flag the trouble spots in a lawyer's search for happiness. Many lawyers, especially those in the private sector, are disappointed that their work doesn't more closely align with their values. Many are also dissatisfied with what they see as the overly competitive, zero-sum nature of much practice today. Finally, many lawyers are struggling, sometimes with limited success, to achieve a happy balance between their professional and personal lives. We look more closely at some of these issues in the next section.\n\n### WHAT ACCOUNTS FOR ATTORNEY UNHAPPINESS?\n\n#### WORK STRESSES, HIGH BILLABLE HOURS AND LOW QUALITY OF LIFE\n\nLying was a way of life\u2014a necessity and therefore a virtue.... Our corporate culture required the show of enthusiasm in all circumstances. A partner would come into your office and ask if you had any plans for the weekend. The correct answer was \"no.\" And you would then be given an assignment to fill your empty Saturday and Sunday. The first time I was asked the question, I mumbled something about having hoped to go to Vermont. The young partner, who was nicknamed \"Dave the Barracuda,\" looked at me with a combination of incredulity and sympathy, as if I had just confessed to a subnormal IQ. \"It's a rhetorical question,\" he explained with an exasperated sigh.\n\nMany lawyers are unhappy with the rigid billable hour requirements of firm life and the long hours that the profession demands. The nature of the work is stressful: clients may have hopelessly unrealistic expectations; deals fall through; running a business while bringing in business is a constant pressure; cases have numerous unalterable deadlines that require late-night work; expenses of taking a case to trial can mount; clients can be convicted\u2014and face life imprisonment or execution. Lawyers represent people who have been traumatized, people who are going through the worst crises of their lives, in sum, people who are unhappy.\n\nOverwork is a piece of the picture. In recent years, billable hour requirements have escalated. In the 1970s, associates at large law firms billed on average about 1,700 hours year (or thirty-four hours each week). In 2009, the national average billable hour requirement for firms of all sizes was 1,888 hours, but expectations for associates on large firm partnership tracks can amount to 1,900\u20131,950 hours each year (an average of roughly forty hours each week). A forty-hour week sounds manageable until you realize that forty billable hours means many more (some estimates range to 50 percent more) actual hours at the office. The billable hour meter typically does not run during firm administration work, pro bono cases, marketing and business generation activities, attorney and staff recruiting activities, training and mentoring sessions for newer associates, or continuing education classes let alone during office face time, coffee breaks, or socializing opportunities with colleagues. Compared to a median work week of forty hours for all full-time employees in America, lawyers work a median of fifty hours per week, and one-fifth of new lawyers work sixty hours or more each week.\n\nA 2009 study by NALP, the Association for Legal Career Professionals, offered billable hour estimates by firm size (see table 1).\n\nThe difference in billable hour requirements between small and large firms seems modest, although attorneys in larger firms put in substantially more nonbillable hour time, when, for example, they perform administrative duties or have face time. Associates work these strenuous hours, but through attrition\u2014both voluntary and involuntary\u2014only about 15 percent of them become partners.\n\nIt is not just that billable hour expectations are on the rise but that partnership and bonus systems are often specifically linked to billable hours. Slightly less than one-half of firms with more than one hundred attorneys used \"meeting fixed goals\" as a measure to determine bonuses. The responses received from various studies and surveys revealed frustration among lawyers that their worth was quantified, and their career advancement determined, by the number of hours they worked. One associate commented, \"devotion equals promotion. The more you work the higher you rise.\" Similarly, The Rodent (an anonymous associate at a large firm writing an underground newsletter) reported that he was often criticized for not billing enough hours until one month, when partners lavished him with praise for high billable hours even though he was busy with \"mostly clerical work\u2014proofreading, sorting documents and making copies.\"\n\nTABLE 1. Yearly Billable Hours by Firm Size\n\nEven some of the perks of large law firm life\u2014on top of starting salaries beginning at $160,000 for first year associates\u2014such as BlackBerrys, catered meals delivered to the associates' desks, and a chauffeur service to drive them home if the trains have stopped running\u2014are props for billable hour production. One law professor commented, \"Many associates feel they are working in nicely decorated sweatshops.\"\n\nTechnology can also contribute to lawyer unhappiness regarding mounting billable hours and less personal time. While today's lawyers may be more productive and efficient due to various technological advances, they are also always \"on call\"\u2014reachable by e-mail, cell-phone, or fax. One _American Lawyer_ survey respondent complained, \"Technology makes it possible for [partners] to encroach on all of your time, whether you're awake, asleep or on vacation.\" Making work more portable has many advantages, but it increasingly blurs the line between being at work and away from work, and this contributes to attorneys' dissatisfaction.\n\nThus, we see that some of the primary reasons for lawyers' discontent with their working lives center on quality of life issues: the overwhelming hours coupled with the idea that the value of an attorney is measured by the number of hours billed; the stressful nature of the work; and the gap between the ideals they had when they entered the profession and the repetitive nature of their daily tasks.\n\n#### LAW IS BECOMING MORE OF A BUSINESS, LESS OF A PROFESSION\n\nMoney is at the root of virtually everything that lawyers don't like about their profession: the long hours, the commercialization, the tremendous pressure to attract and retain clients, the fiercely competitive marketplace, the lack of collegiality and loyalty among partners, the poor public image of the profession, and even the lack of civility.\n\nThe practice of law has become more of a business and less of a profession. Law firms focus on maximizing profits. Money is equated with firm prestige and individual career success. These economic forces are not unique to law. The uptick in greed and competition can be found in most occupations, industries, and social life. Economists Robert Frank and Philip Cook call it the \"winner take all\" society.\n\nLaw firms afford lawyers much less job security than in previous generations. Firms are willing to abandon practice areas that are less lucrative. They also have few qualms about jettisoning lawyers. The early 1990s saw layoffs of both lawyers and bankers in response to the bank credit crunch and junk bond market collapse. In recent years, the cascade of economic problems resulting from the subprime mortgage crisis has prompted slower hiring, attorney and staff layoffs, summer hiring freezes, rescinding of job offers, and \"redeployments\" of real estate and finance lawyers into other practice areas.\n\nHigh rates of attorney turnover lead to reduced loyalty to firms. Within five years of graduating from law school, 80 percent of associates will have changed jobs at least once. This is up from two-thirds in the 1988\u201396 period, and compares even less favorably to the historical view of Traditionalists and Baby Boomers of a lifetime career at a single firm. Even when associates make partner, the relationship is no longer a permanent union. There are numerous different types of arrangements: typically equity (part-owners of the business) and nonequity partners, of counsel or senior counsel positions. These heavily stratified partnership structures create alienating hierarchies. In tiered partnerships, subordinate partners are often treated more like permanent employees than co-owners.\n\nLaw firm consolidations, dissolutions, and lateral hiring have always existed but increasingly have become routine. With the accelerating pace of consolidations has come a change in the nature of mergers. Law professor David Achtenberg says, \"It would have been virtually inconceivable twenty years ago for a firm to merge into another one knowing that doing so would create a conflict of interest that would force a significant number of partners in the firm to have to leave or would strip many of its partners of any meaningful control in the newly created entity. Today it is common.\" Mergers and acquisitions add to feelings of instability and undermine trust.\n\nLawyers pay attention to the financial bottom line and try to maximize profits; success is measured solely in quantifiable terms\u2014numbers of billable hours, hourly rates, fees, or favorable verdicts. Some lawyers may respond to economic pressures by doing what their clients want even if their behavior dances on the borderline of unethical conduct. Fee structures encourage continued combat. Examples abound of defense lawyers continuing litigation for years to protect their income stream of exorbitant hourly wage work.\n\nSome lawyers cross the line and participate in unethical conduct. Others engage in offensive and unprofessional behavior that ranges from rudeness to obstructionist tactics. We turn next to dissatisfactions related to lawyer incivility.\n\n#### INCIVILITY\n\n_She wants to play dirty, I can play dirty... I went to law school, people._\n\n\u2014Bride Wars\n\nOne of the largest dissatisfactions with lawyers' professional lives is other lawyers. Incivility is rampant. In any gathering of lawyers, you will hear complaints about lawyer incivilities. Competitive tactics have long been part of the profession, but incivility is escalating, particularly in larger cities. In smaller towns, everybody still knows everybody else; in more sprawling metropolitan areas, lawyers practice against opposing counsel they may see once and then never again. What is lost is not just a sense of a professional community but civility.\n\nThe adversarial system and the ethical obligation of zealous representation have spawned some mutant offspring. Some lawyers perceive that playing hardball brings a strategic advantage; others think litigation is a form of warfare. They may launch personal attacks and engage in insults, name-calling, threats of bar complaints, rudeness, and hostility. The unprofessional behavior extends from lawyer-to-lawyer contacts to depositions and into the courtroom. Examples of rudeness in reported cases include sarcastic and inappropriate language, diminutive names for female lawyers (e.g., \"little lady\"), references to defendants as, in one case, \"snake[s] in the grass,\" and in another, \"cowardly, dirty, low down dogs,\" and purely offensive and uncooperative behavior. In one survey of lawyers, 56 percent of those responding \"cited obnoxiousness as the most common, unpleasant quality they encounter among other lawyers.\" In a random sample of more than 4,600 respondents to an Eighth Circuit survey, nearly three-quarters of all female lawyers and one-half of all male lawyers reported that they had experienced general or gender-related incivility in the past five years. According to two other polls, 69 percent of lawyers thought that civility in the profession had declined over time, and 80 percent of judges had observed uncivil attorney conduct in their courtrooms.\n\nDeclining civility is due to an abundance of lawyers and an increase in competition for business, a decrease in mentoring of new lawyers, the absence of repeat interactions with the same small coterie of lawyers, and the rise of social incivility generally. Of course, part of the explanation may be a \"good old days\" problem. Older lawyers may remember practice thirty or forty years ago as more idyllic than it was. In 1932 Clarence Darrow wrote that \"trials were not being conducted in a dignified effort to find the truth but more like a prize-ring combat.\" (An interesting observation, coming as it does from one of the greatest courtroom prize-fighters of all time.)\n\nThe more contemporary scorched earth litigation tactics at times go beyond manipulation of facts, assertion of frivolous claims, hardball negotiation, disrespect for witnesses, ruthless cross-examination, discovery abuses, and unmeritorious appeals. State disciplinary boards have sanctioned lawyers for calling opposing counsel names like \"punk,\" \"boy,\" \"fool,\" and \"idiot\"; shoving other attorneys; and in one case threatening an attorney-defendant who refused to settle with \" 'the legal equivalent of a proctology exam.' \" The Supreme Court of South Carolina issued a public reprimand to a lawyer who told a \"deponent that he would like 'to be locked in a room with [her] naked with a sharp knife,' and that he needed 'a big bag' to put her in 'without the mouth cut out.'\" A popular YouTube video shows several prominent Texas lawyers devolving into colorful name-calling during a deposition.\n\nWith the constant friction, lawyers feel isolated and learn to mistrust each other. It is stressful to go to war (er, work) each day having to anticipate Rambo litigation tactics and personal attacks\u2014and not just from opposing counsel.\n\nThe competition and discontent also percolate into law firms. One of the first tensions is among peer associates in what Marc Galanter and Thomas Palay call the \"promotion-to-partner tournament\":\n\nOver a fixed period of time, the firm holds a contest in which all the associates in a particular \"entering class\" compete, with the prize of partnership being awarded to some fixed percentage of the \"top\" contestants. An associate's final standing in the tournament depends upon the size and quality of his production of two goods: (1) high-quality legal work; and (2) his own human capital, measured subjectively, not mechanically. After a specified period of time, the players in a particular class are ranked and those in the top stratum are declared \"winners.\" (This may vary from ten to ninety percent). The losers are told that they can remain employees but will never become partners; or they may be given consolation prizes, such as severance pay or help finding another job; or they may be unceremoniously dumped.\n\nPartners can play too, although the games are somewhat different. Some partners engage in client-hoarding. The lateral mobility of lawyers, particularly those who control business, has created substantial incentives for those who currently have close relationships with a client to be certain that no one else does. By not sharing work with other partners, but instead delegating work to subordinate associates, a lawyer retains bargaining power within the firm and has a book of business to take down the road to a potential acquiring firm. Lawyers, as mercenaries who are always ready to pack their briefcases and head down the road\u2014like a yuppie version of the _Grapes of Wrath_ \u2014also have little incentive to engage in meaningful social relationships with other people in their present firm.\n\nA side result of this declining civility is the elevation of marketing over craft. The internal economic forces in a firm that prompt attorneys to hoard clients also create disincentives for lawyers to share work with the most competent lawyer for a particular issue to avoid risks of client-poaching. Attention to revenue undermines professionalism.\n\nThe adversarial system can also take its toll on your personal relationships. Professor David Guenther tells this story of winning an argument, while a good thing in the courtroom, can be a bad thing for a relationship:\n\nSeveral years ago a male student thanked me for what he had learned in my course. \"For the first time,\" he said, \"I'm winning arguments with my girlfriend.\" Coincidentally, a few months later, a female student asked me for advice on how to get her boyfriend to stop arguing like a lawyer. I told her about the time I thought I was having a conversation with my wife when she suddenly retorted: \"Stop cross-examining me!\"\n\n#### KEEPING UP WITH THE JONES DAYS\n\nAnother dynamic that recently has entered the legal profession is the spread of information about co-workers' incomes, as well as the business-like calculation of partners' shares and associates' salaries and bonuses. The knowledge of relative wealth has exploded in the past twenty years. Accompanying this knowledge has been the conflation of wealth with worth.\n\nBefore 1975, when the Supreme Court held that the practice constituted price-fixing, local bar associations used to publish minimum fee schedules. Back then, few lawyers made astronomical amounts of money. Now there are more who do, whether it is through lucrative plaintiffs' practices or large draws by partners at firms. Not only has there been a surge in what the richest lawyers are making, but also there has been a vast change in the extent to which everyone knows all of the information.\n\nIn 1987 journalist and lawyer Steven Brill started _American Lawyer_. Before its publication, lawyers had a general understanding that it wasn't polite to talk openly about how much money they and their co-workers earned. Lawyers had a general sense of who was doing well, but it was not directly discussed. Brill's innovation, which made the magazine a huge success, was to blow away that inhibition on talking about what lawyers were being paid. The magazine published lists of starting salaries for new lawyers and of exactly what partners were making at all the big firms. That changed things, because lawyers became much more acutely aware of where they stood in the financial pecking order. Although _American Lawyer_ concentrated on the biggest firms, it trickled down because the focus on what those top-paid lawyers were making generated envy and insecurity.\n\n#### BIGGER IS NOT BETTER\n\nLaw firms are expanding in size and that has adverse consequences for lawyer happiness. In the United States, at least six hundred firms employ one hundred or more lawyers each. The 250 largest firms collectively employ more than 120,000 lawyers. Firm size can make an enormous difference in the types of relationships lawyers have with both their work and other lawyers. In a thirty-or forty-lawyer firm, every lawyer knows every other lawyer. In a firm with two hundred lawyers, that doesn't happen. Bigger may not be better when it comes to happiness in law firms. People feel uncomfortable when substantial control over their future and success depends on people they do not know.\n\nAs firms grow bigger, the slices of work done on cases by individual lawyers get smaller. Attorneys work on minor pieces of huge cases and engage in endless review of documents with little human contact. When they do communicate with each other, they do so by e-mail and conference calls and through Fed Ex drops. Lawyers become alienated from the nature of their work, and they do not see how their work matters.\n\nYet people are different, and for some lawyers the big firm is the perfect choice. Most highly specialized, sophisticated litigation is conducted by large firms, and many lawyers report enjoying the intellectual challenges presented in those cases. Other happy large-firm lawyers point to the high-quality training and mentoring they received, or to their delight in having so many smart, interesting colleagues from whom to draw their circle of friends. For introverted lawyers, large firms typically offer a variety of research or transactional work that may reduce the discomfort they would feel in more socially demanding small firm settings. Finally, of course, there is the money. Money can't buy happiness, but sometimes it can be a shield against unhappiness. Big firms generally offer compensation at the top of the salary charts, and for today's many debt-ridden law graduates, a generous starting salary means one less big stressor.\n\n#### FEELING UNLOVED\n\nQ: What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of pond scum?\n\nA: The bucket.\n\nQ: Why does California have the most lawyers and New Jersey the most toxic waste dumps?\n\nA: New Jersey got first pick.\n\nQ: What do you call six hundred lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?\n\nA: A good start.\n\nQ: What is the difference between a dead rattlesnake and a dead lawyer in the middle of the road?\n\nA: There are skid marks in front of the rattlesnake.\n\nQ: What's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?\n\nA: A Doberman Pincher.\n\nOf course, the ultimate anti-lawyer joke is that lawyers don't think anti-lawyer jokes are funny and that everyone else doesn't think they're jokes.\n\nThe public has a dismal opinion of lawyers. In a 2006 Gallup poll survey of Americans' opinions about the levels of honesty and ethical standards in twenty-three professions, only 18 percent of respondents gave lawyers a \"very high\" or \"high\" ethics rating. Lawyers ranked well below nurses (84 percent), doctors (69 percent), clergy (58 percent), and police officers (54 percent) but ranked above members of Congress (14 percent), insurance salesmen (13 percent), and car salesmen (7 percent). An ABA survey revealed that nearly three-quarters of those responding believe that lawyers try to win no matter the costs and will \"manipulate both the system and the truth.\" Lawyers are perceived as crooked, unethical, greedy, aggressive, and untrustworthy: a combination of mistrust and dislike.\n\nWhy do people love to hate lawyers? A number of factors are at work. Lawyers inevitably suffer in reputation because they tend, just by the nature of their jobs, to be heavily involved in negative things. In other words, people don't need lawyers when things are going great, or at least they don't need them to be as visible. If a corporation is profitable, nobody is going to notice its lawyers, or think, \"gee, they must have an excellent legal team.\" Lawyers take a more prominent role when things are bad\u2014bankruptcies, accusations of crime, or divorces. People seek the services of lawyers when they are in trouble, so the \"public will always associate lawyers with some of life's worst moments.\" (Although clergy often step in during difficult situations too, they also celebrate the best of times with worshippers, and clergy don't absorb the blame when things go wrong.) It may be hard to avoid being tarnished by the negative associations, even if lawyers perform admirably and try to make the best of bad situations.\n\nLawyers are merchants of misery. They see people in times of stress or crisis and, unlike other professionals, can't always, perhaps not even often, make clients happy. As Professor Andrew McClurg observes, \"Litigated disputes, by their nature, have winners and losers. Each one leaves someone hurting financially and often emotionally.\" Aside from mediation, lawyers lose their cases about half the time, and even when they \"win,\" their clients may not obtain all the relief they want.\n\nWhile lawyers get dragged into the mud every time something bad happens, they rarely accumulate occupational brownie points for a job well done. Except for some fictional portrayals (such as Atticus Finch in _To Kill a Mockingbird_ ), civil rights cases, and actual innocence project cases, where lawyers championed the exoneration of incarcerated prisoners through DNA evidence, it is difficult to think of cases that prompted the public to react: \"Wow, good lawyering!\"\n\nLawyers must deal with clients' complaints about fees. The fee charged is often a large amount for the client and a small amount for an attorney. Very few clients feel the amount charged bears any relationship to the value received even when the lawyer is being responsible about fees.\n\nLawyers, particularly those who represent corporate giants or despicable criminal defendants, are perceived as hired guns whose values mirror those of their clients. A lawyer's function is not to be disinterested, impartial, or revealing; so, it is no wonder that the derogatory name \"mouthpiece\" has developed as a slang term for lawyer. The adversarial process encourages actions that may be perceived as lies, delays, and mindless posturing to create room for negotiation. \"Those initial positions... may make lawyers seem hostile, aggressive and bloodthirsty, more interested in vicious battle than peaceful and prompt resolution.\"\n\nThe public's attitude toward the profession is also formed by the media. Most Americans get the vast majority of their information about the legal system from the popular media, principally television. Hard news reports include spins about the \"increases in the volume, cost and duration of litigation, as well as the number of lawyers, and the size of their incomes.\" Much of the information about increases in the volume of litigation\u2014and especially the size of awards in personal injury cases\u2014is not true; but truth isn't the issue here. Sometimes the news and entertainment media blur together, resulting in the \"entertain-ification\" of the law. News reports about cases often come in sound bites from talking head legal analysts. Television personalities, such as Nancy Grace, urge the public to rush to judgment and portray lawyers (particularly criminal defense lawyers) as out to thwart justice at every turn. As a result, highly publicized circus trials occur, accompanied by \"media misinformation about what was actually going on in some of those trials.\" Every lawyer standing next to an unpopular client is tarnished by the association.\n\nPart of the negative public impression comes from the pop culture spin. TV and movie depictions are often of bad lawyers in a profession characterized by greed, incompetence, and cynicism. While the prosecutors on _Law & Order_ (especially Sam Water-ston as Jack McCoy) are heroic, the defense lawyers are smug and insufferable. In the movie _Jurassic Park_ , audiences cheered when the first human the dinosaur devours is the lawyer. In _The Devil's Advocate_ , Al Pacino plays the managing partner of a law firm who actually _is_ Satan. Being a member of a profession that faces a continual barrage of negative stereotyping from Hollywood and jokes from Jay Leno can be exhausting and saddening and can leave the human who holds the job \"feeling empty and disillusioned.\"\n\nThe cumulative effect of many of these dissatisfactions in the profession\u2014the hours, fierce competition, incivility, and public aversion\u2014may help explain why numerous people have had the same one-word reaction to the concept of happy lawyers: \"oxymoron.\" We like to think of the idea as not an oxymoron but as a possibility.\n\nWe sometimes forget there are many upsides of being a lawyer\u2014features of the job that are connected to attorney satisfaction. Let's remind ourselves of some of them.\n\n#### LAW IS A NOBLE PROFESSION\n\n[I]t is we lawyers who create the mechanism for people involved in serious conflicts to peacefully resolve their conflicts in a system that places a search for the truth as a centerpiece of dispute resolution.\n\nPerhaps you are one of the many attorneys who not only like your job but feel that you are pursuing a passion as a well as a career. Being a lawyer can involve doing rewarding work. Law is a career in which you can make significant contributions, whether by handling adoptions, defending the Constitution, fighting race and gender discrimination, drafting legislation, protecting a battered partner, advising business entrepreneurs, tackling corporate Goliaths, or simply by being a trusted advisor. It also opens possibilities to contribute to the architecture of society: \"Unfortunately, when one looks at a construction site or a building, one sees only the bricks and mortar, the workers, the cranes, the splendid architecture, and the engineering miracles. The myriad legal structures and devices are invisible.... Lawyers help build the world.\" Social activists\u2014those engaged in cause-lawyering\u2014really can change the world because they can change the rules. Lawyers' words can become laws.\n\nLawyers are public citizens; they are vital in a democracy. Almost every lawyer-disparager, it seems, likes to trot out the line from Shakespeare's _Henry VI_ : \"First thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.\" Few people realize, however, that the character offering the anti-lawyer remark, Dick the Butcher, is an outlaw and that his suggestion is made in the hopes of making life easier for lawbreakers everywhere. A world without lawyers would be a world in chaos. Economists have found remarkably strong positive correlations between the availability of lawyers in a society and the existence of civil rights and civil liberties. Lawyers can engage in work that is socially significant and produces a relatively good income. But law is more about analytical challenges, intellectual stimulation, and the human dimensions of being a helping profession.\n\n#### LAWYERS MAKE A DIFFERENCE\n\nThe _Legal Underground_ blog tried to find out what lawyers enjoy about the profession, posing the question: \"What do you like best about being a lawyer?\" Some of the answers include:\n\nI like working with intelligent, thoughtful people.\n\nWhat I like best about being a lawyer has to do with the all-encompassing nature of the enterprise. Every day I am able to help people with disputes and issues that are beyond their own ability to handle.\n\nI enjoy counseling clients\u2014they trust me. They listen to me. I tell them what to do and they do it. I solve problems for them.\n\nI like being a lawyer because I have the ability, access and opportunity to change, make or clarify law.\n\nI like knowing the rules. More than anything else, I like that fact. I don't have to wonder where I stand legally with regard to much of anything. If I don't know something, I know where to find out about it.\n\nWhat I love about being a lawyer is that I give a voice to people that otherwise have no one to stand up for them.\n\nI like fixing problems. I am happiest when I am fixing a problem, regardless what kind of problem.\n\nI went to law school in large part because I saw the impact that some lawyers had in their communities. That's really what I want to do with my life, try to make the community in which I live a better place.\n\nA repeated theme was making a difference in people's lives. One child advocacy lawyer said, \"I love the work I do. It is an amazing feeling to be able to actually help people through such incredibly dark times.\" In a later chapter, we will return to the stories of lawyers who find the practice of law satisfying, who are passionate about their work, and who have attained personal fulfillment in their jobs.\n\nProfessor David Guenther argues that \"it is almost impossible to become a lawyer and not acquire a passion for justice.\" Exposure to people who have suffered injustice will cause you to \"feel what they feel\" and \"understand it is not a game.\" If you are a lawyer worth your salt, \"their cause will become your cause and you will become a passionate representative of their rights.\" Guenther maintains that this passion, if \"channeled properly,\" will \"bring out the best in you and inspire others.\"\n\nLaw, as a helping profession, can claim many heroes. John Adams, late in an accomplishment-filled life that included playing a key role in gaining our independence and serving as our second president, wrote that it was his work as a young lawyer defending British soldiers who had opened fire on a mob of Americans during the Boston Massacre in 1770 that he was proudest of: \"It was... one of the most gallant, generous, manly and disinterested Actions of my whole Life, and one of the best Pieces of Service I ever rendered my Country.\" From abolitionist lawyers in the eighteenth century who dedicated their careers to fighting slavery to lawyers of today's innocence projects who work tirelessly to free the wrongly convicted, each generation has produced lawyer heroes. Lawyers have helped bend \"the moral arc of the universe... toward justice.\" You, as a lawyer, have it within your power to help people, to make a corner of the world better, to vindicate rights, to do justice, to become a peacemaker. In the words of Pope Paul VI, \"If you want peace, work for justice.\"\n\nMany lawyers are passionate about their work\u2014they experience the nobility of law and truly enjoy making a difference in people's lives. Sometimes, though, when we are slogging through briefs and drafting documents late at night, we wonder if the rewarding parts of our jobs will outweigh the tedious ones in five years, or in ten.\n\n### THE ARC OF CAREERS\n\nThere is good news. Satisfaction with a career tends to increase over time. As the years go by, many workers manage to find ways to spend more time performing the tasks they enjoy most, while passing off to other\u2014usually younger\u2014workers some of the more annoying tasks. More experienced workers generally have achieved a higher level of competence and that makes for less job-related anxiety. They have a clearer understanding of what is expected from them. Finally, in the absence of excessive turnover, bad hires, or a repellant personality, they likely have accumulated a set of relationships that provide support and a source of fun.\n\nSurveys of lawyer satisfaction show a clear upward trend in job satisfaction over time. According to an ABA study, lawyers with more than a decade worth of experience reported career satisfaction that was 40 to 50 percent higher than those with less than ten years work as a lawyer. Atlanta career consultant Monica R. Parker offered this explanation for the happiness of more experienced lawyers: \"Probably they've become partners or senior counsel, and by that time they've decided that the law is for them; they're going to stay and they like it.\"\n\nIn addition to more satisfying work and more work product control, there is another reason for higher career satisfaction as the years go by. As we age, we learn to use more \"mature adaptations\" to deal with the inevitable setbacks and disappointments that come our way. Mature adaptations probably account for the higher rates of happiness reported by people in their sixties than in their twenties. When we are young and confronted by frustrations, we are more inclined to turn to repression, disassociation, projection, or passive aggression (consult your old Psych 101 text to jog your memory about these classic defense mechanisms). As we get older, we increasingly use healthier techniques, including altruism, humor, anticipation, suppression, and sublimation. For example, an older person is somewhat less likely to obsess about an office slight and more likely to shrug it off or laugh about it.\n\nThe central finding of George Valliant, in _Adaptation to Life_ , an account of a classic longitudinal study of'42, '43, and '44 male Harvard University graduates as they progressed from their early twenties through middle age and into old age, is that developing mature adaptations to setbacks is the single best predictor of a successful life. Of course, being mature in years is no guarantee of having developed mature adaptations, and many people\u2014including many in the Harvard study\u2014never mastered that singularly helpful ability. We all can think of a senior relative or colleague who still throws fits or turns sour and silent when things don't go his or her way.\n\nAs lawyers progress through their careers, they typically have a variety of work environments in which to practice their adaptations. By the time they hit midcareer, most lawyers have changed jobs more than once, and only 15 percent, according to a study of University of Virginia law grads, still hold the job they took when they graduated. Some clear trends emerge from longitudinal studies of lawyers. While income continues to increase as a career goes on, fewer and fewer lawyers remain in private practice. Many migrate into smaller firms or accept in-house counsel positions. Substantial numbers of law grads in their forties, perhaps a quarter or so according to the Virginia study, have left the regular practice of law altogether and have instead moved on to jobs in academia and banking or became CEOs and small business owners.\n\nWhile the story in many regards is the same for female lawyers as for male lawyers, there is one critical gender difference that emerges. Vastly more women than men interrupt their employment, usually to care at home for small children. The dramatic difference in this situation, although probably in decline, could hardly be overstated. For lawyers now in their forties, the percent of women who have at least temporarily left employment is about 40 percent while for men the figure is only about 1 percent. Despite the higher rate of interruptions and its effect on partnership tracks, the Virginia study found \"no significant gender differences on any dimension of job satisfaction.\" Women might complain more about \"work-life balance\" issues in law firms, but overall they still report levels of job satisfaction equal to that of males.\n\nThat lawyers change jobs, and that job-changing is occurring ever more often in our rapidly evolving economy, comes as no surprise. More often than not, the changes\u2014when they are voluntary\u2014seem to work out for the better. But it is important to remember that constantly being on the look out for a better job comes at a cost. Restless lawyers never seem to be able to enjoy what they've achieved or, more importantly, develop the sense commitment and deep collegial bonds that can lead to higher levels of career satisfaction. Psychologist Barry Schwartz observes, \"there comes a point at which opportunities become so numerous that we feel overwhelmed.... Time spent dealing with choice is time taken away from being a good friend, a good spouse, a good parent, and a good congregant.\"\n\nWhat about career's end? What about that time when all the job-changing is done and lawyers either put away their briefcase for good or began finding time amidst the cases for rounds of midweek golf? Going from full-time work to a dead stop poses some risks, both to mental acuity and to relationships, making part-time work an attractive option for many older lawyers. This plan works well for some; others find, however, that going part-time is not a real option and that the nature of the work keeps them plugging away as hard as ever, despite their intentions. Retirement, interestingly, seems to have almost no effect on levels of personal happiness. Almost exactly the same percentage of retirees (36 percent) and full-time workers (35 percent) report themselves as being \"very happy.\" The data are clear that busy people are happier than those with little to do: the most satisfied ex-lawyers are those who find hobbies, sports, and friendships to fill their free hours. Both working lawyers and retired lawyers, unsurprisingly, are considerably happier than the unemployed. Only 16 percent of unemployed men said they were \"very happy,\" less than half the percentage of employed men agreeing to the same statement. Daniel Nettle attributes the unhappiness of the out-of-work to a common feeling among this group that they have little control over their lives, not that they have lower incomes on average. Statistically speaking, Nettle notes, a sense of personal control is a twenty-times better predictor of happiness than income.\n\nLawyers often sprinkle the introductory phrase, \"But even if . . .\" into their briefs. You may be thinking, \"But even if... the arc of a career for most lawyers holds the promise of future satisfaction, will that apply to me?\" Maybe you feel you are too competitive, too analytical or too much of a worrier\u2014all qualities associated with lawyers (although not, of course, all lawyers)\u2014to ever be happy. You might wonder if lawyers have distinct personality traits that undermine their happiness.\n\n### IS THERE A \"LAWYER PERSONALITY\" THAT AFFECTS CAREER SATISFACTION?\n\n_I fear that happiness isn't in my line,... blaming the disposition that was given to me at birth._\n\n\u2014U.S. Supreme Court Justice Benjamin Cardozo\n\nDo lawyers become unhappy people or do unhappy people become lawyers? Many of the existing works on unhappy lawyers posit that the practice of law makes people unhappy. When assessing whether a profession breeds unhappiness, it is important to keep in mind the difference between correlation and causation. Do people inclined toward unhappiness select law as a profession or does the practice of law induce, or perhaps exacerbate, those feelings?\n\nThe NORC career study suggests that happier people gravitate to some careers more often than others. It is also true that different personality types are disproportionately represented in different careers. It is likely that shy, helpful people are overrepresented in our nation's libraries; jobs in sales are disproportionately filled by extroverts; and that rodeo performers, by and large, are less risk-averse than the general population.\n\nIs the practice of law disproportionately filled by people with certain personality traits? The answer is clearly \"yes.\" When compared to the general population on a standard measure of personality types, a distinctive picture of lawyers emerges. Lawyers, as a group, are more introverted, more doubt-ridden, and more cool and logical than most people. They are less open about their feelings and less inclined to live in the present than most people. Lawyers are competitive, confident (sometimes a kiss away from arrogant), aggressive, and achievement-oriented; they can be argumentative.\n\nWe're not talking about you, of course, but many lawyers\u2014including some very successful lawyers\u2014express \"high dominance\" personalities. High dominance personalities are associated with a strong competitive drive and are marked by frequently interrupting, controlling conversations, changing topics, offering unsolicited advice or instructions, and stating strong opinions. In the courtroom, a strong competitive drive can be the difference between winning and losing for your client, so this personality type can be a career positive at the same time that it might sour the personal relationships so essential to both personal and career happiness.\n\nMany lawyers are analytical problem-solvers who value thoughts and ideas, as opposed to feelings, in their interactions with other people. Lawyers may also be exacting and tenacious, which are useful qualities for their work, but those are behaviors that can be noxious in interactions with opposing counsel. In short, the personality traits most common among lawyers are not those usually associated with happy people. Of course, lawyers are a diverse group and some lawyers are as extroverted, confident, and inclined to live in the here-and-now as anyone, but the evidence is that many lawyers already have a strike against them in the quest for a happy career.\n\nMartin Seligman, the father of positive psychology, and colleagues published a law review article exploring the question \"Why Lawyers Are Unhappy,\" arguing that a major source of lawyer discontent stems from the fact that \"lawyers are selected for their pessimism, or \"prudence,\" and this generalizes to the rest of their lives.\" A study at the University of Virginia School of Law showed that pessimists outperformed their optimistic peers in terms of law school success, such as grade point average and participation on law review. People who choose law school are more often than not inclined to see glasses as half-empty rather than half-full, say the authors, and also more inclined to believe they are responsible for bad results, when they occur, and that those bad results will have lasting effects. These attitudes are not associated with good military leaders, insurance agents, or professional athletes, but they often do help people become better lawyers\u2014at least better lawyers of a certain type. Transactional lawyers, in particular, owe it to their clients to anticipate and worry over worst-case scenarios. Caution and skepticism can help clients if and when things do later go to hell in a hand basket.\n\nBut the \"downside\" of pessimism, if you will, is fairly obvious. As the authors note, \"the qualities that make for a good lawyer... may not make for a happy human being.\" When they are not worrying about the future of their clients, pessimistic lawyers are likely worrying about whether they will make partner, whether they are really contributing to the public good in any way, or whether an airplane will fly into their skyscraper. Of course, these traits are compounded by psychological stressors of the job: high pressure and for many lawyers, particularly newer associates, limited latitude to make decisions or control their working conditions. The interplay of attorneys' personality traits and the professional demands of the job can prove toxic.\n\nLaw professor Larry Krieger and psychology professor Ken Sheldon take issue with the hypothesis that law is the career of self-selection by unhappy people. Instead, they hold law schools responsible for turning happy students into unhappy graduates. Krieger and Sheldon studied classes from two different law schools from orientation through graduation and compared these students to a population of undergraduates. They concluded that the \"incoming [law] students were happier, more well-adjusted, and more idealistic\/intrinsically oriented than a comparison undergraduate sample,\" but that the educational cues in law school culture create graduates that \"are significantly different people from those who arrived to begin law school: They are more depressed, less service-oriented, and more inclined toward undesirable, superficial goals and values.\" In chapter 5, we examine the extent to which the teaching methods, implicit messages, and career steerage in law schools help mold lawyer personalities.\n\nTo achieve happiness for some lawyers means struggling against their natures and against the very traits that contribute to their success. Poet Edgar Lee Masters had a day job as partner in the firm of famous defense lawyer Clarence Darrow. He wrote sympathetically about Darrow's \"artist sense that drives him to shape his life to something harmonious, even against the schemes of God.\" It may well be, for many of us in the legal profession, the schemes of God do not include our happiness, and we must work to steal from life what satisfaction we can.\n\nIf you have been doing a psychological self-assessment while you read the last few paragraphs, mentally checking off the boxes for ambition, tenacity, and perhaps functional pessimism, remember that personality has some plasticity. These personality characteristics are not fixed. Abundant research shows that behaviors change over time and are influenced by social arrangements, and that optimism is an outlook that can be learned. If the psychological demographics of lawyer satisfaction do not work in your favor, there are things you can do within law to become happier.\n\nThis chapter has focused mostly on what makes lawyers unhappy. The next chapter offers a toolbox for achieving greater happiness. We turn next to the tools and tricks you can use to steal more happiness from your career as a lawyer.\n\n## **CHAPTER 4\n\nThe Happiness Toolbox**\n\nODDS ARE, IF YOU ARE READING THIS BOOK, YOU'RE not as happy with your job as you'd like to be. (If you've got the perfect job, congratulations\u2014pass this book on to a friend who can better use it.) You'd probably like to know what you can do to become a happier lawyer. You've come to the right chapter.\n\nThis chapter will give you the tools you can use to build a happier practice or repair an unhappy one. As is usually the case with a toolbox, some of the items in it might be well-suited to a particular job while others might not. Look through the collection of tools we offer, and see which of them seem promising for your own situation.\n\nThe source of career unhappiness can be the nature of your job, or it can be the nature of you, but it is almost always a combination of both. What might be a very good job for someone with a particular personality just might make you miserable. But also, as we'll see, there are characteristics of certain jobs that are virtually guaranteed to undo the smile of any human being with a pulse.\n\nPeople are more similar in their basic likes and dislikes than many people suppose. What makes you happy in a job most likely would also make your neighbor across the street happy. Your neighbor might play classical music while you prance around your living room to '80s disco music, but still, at your cores, similar things probably make you happy at the most basic level. You and your neighbor probably, according to consistent social science research, seek a measure of control in your life, enjoy being connected to other people, feel a bit better about your situations when you see people worse off than yourselves, like to \"get in the flow\" of an engaging activity, and want\u2014at some deep level\u2014to do work that aligns with your values. These core desires are not satisfied equally in all jobs, and many of these desires are not satisfied at all in some jobs, but the degree to which a job fulfills them goes a long way to predicting how happy you are in your career.\n\nOf course, if it were a simple matter of taking a checklist of near universal desires and applying it to a specific job opportunity in the field of law, we'd probably all have our checklists by now and be clamoring for the same jobs. Finding as much happiness as can be found in a legal career is not nearly so simple. It requires not only a deep understanding of a set of basic desires but also an understanding of how the various desires are weighted in your own hierarchy of values, plus an appreciation of what you can do to make a specific job do a _better_ job of meeting your basic desires. Jobs are not objects set in concrete; they are goal-directed, behavioral systems that can be restructured to make those in them happier creatures.\n\nSo let's open up our happiness toolbox to see what can be found that might make you a happier lawyer.\n\n### MATTERING MATTERS: THE JOY OF FEELING IN CONTROL\n\nIf you want happiness as a lawyer, get control of your life. \"Yeah, right,\" you say as you work frantically to meet the filing deadline for Acme's summary judgment motion while you speed dial your nanny to see if she can pick up your second-grader and get him to the baseball game that you're going to have to miss. Getting control of your life won't be easy, and there might be financial pain, but it has to be done for the sake of your emotional well-being. When we sense our lives are spinning out of control, we are very unhappy creatures.\n\n#### THE RAT RACE\n\nEduardo Punset argues that loss of control is \"the ultimate origin of unhappiness and depression.\" As he sees it, the brain hidden away in its \"dark room,\" removed from the actions it interprets, needs to feel that it is in charge. What is true for humans seems to be true as well for our animal brethren. Punset points to an experiment conducted in the late 1970s. Researchers put five rats in separate cages. The rats were subjected to strong electric shocks at random intervals. One rat, however, had a lever which, when pushed, ended the shocks for all five rats. By the end of six weeks, the immune systems and emotional systems of four rats had broken down and they died\u2014essentially of depression. The rat with the lever survived many months after the deaths of his fellow rats, even though all rats had received exactly the same doses of electric shocks.\n\nNumerous studies confirm that humans feel the same way about control as rats do. Studies with subjects ranging from college students to British civil servants to elderly nursing home residents consistently show that control is closely related to happiness. When, for example, nursing home residents were put in control of watering and tending a plants, they reported higher levels of happiness (and, remarkably, _half_ the death rate) compared to residents in a low-control group who were told that a staff person would take care of the plants. In another study, happiness levels among British civil servants turned out not to depend on their salary levels but on the degree to which the various jobs allowed them to exercise control.\n\nA sense of being in control is critical to happiness in virtually any domain, from relationships to bodily functions to motoring down highways. But we're interested here in jobs. Thinking about those unhappy experimental rats, Punset sees control as the most important key to job happiness. He writes, \"When my students... ask me for my opinion on possible job positions, I always suggest that they only accept posts with a control lever, however small, and that they never accept, even if offered a lot of money, a post where no one and nothing depends upon what they do.\"\n\nIt is a fact of life that most lawyers do not have the same degree of control in their jobs as do people in many other occupations. A shop owner controls when the shop opens, what products are sold and for how much, how the products will be displayed, and who will do the selling. A football coach has control over what plays will be run, how long practice will be, and who will start at quarterback. An artist wakes up each morning free to create anything within his imagination. But a lawyer? As a lawyer, you pretty much do the work a client needs done, whether it's your idea of an interesting project or not. True, you might have control over what arguments are made on a client's behalf or the exact form a contract will take\u2014but compared to some other occupations, that control might not seem like much. This lack of control might well account for the fact that lawyers had the highest rates of major depressive orders among surveyed occupations. Researchers suggest that lack of control is linked to depression and noted that lawyers and secretaries (two of the three highest risk groups) had relatively little autonomy.\n\nTo understand what might be done to better our lives, given that control is not one of our occupation's selling points, it is helpful to recognize what brings on a feeling of control. The feeling comes only when a number of things combine in a job. Control, it turns out, has several aspects.\n\n#### THE FACETS OF CONTROL\n\nWhat are these several facets of control? One comes when you feel that you've achieved an appropriate balance between the demands of your job and the demands that come from being a parent, spouse, relative, or friend. A sense of balance also requires that you take care of your own emotional needs, whether by simply making time for beers after work with colleagues, catching that new episode of your favorite television show, or fitting in an after-work golf game on an inviting May evening. How often on a late Friday afternoon have you seen your plans to catch your kid's school play or have dinner with friends all go up in smoke? That motion for a summary judgment has to be filed before the courthouse closes and you still have three voice messages and seven e-mails that need some sort of response before you're out the door. \"Work-life balance?\u2014you've got to be kidding!\" It's what everyone you know talks about, but no one in your office seems to have. We feel the demands of life are pulling us along and that our own internal compass is helpless to determine our direction.\n\nA sense of being out of control is commonplace today, especially in the large firms, where career dissatisfaction is the greatest. Seventy percent of lawyers in an American Bar Association (ABA) study said that \"wanting more time with family\" is a reason that might justify leaving one job for another. Nearly 20 percent of lawyers are \"not at all\" happy with the work-life balance in their present employment. Women, unsurprisingly, are far more likely than men to complain about the stress work is placing on their family life.\n\nA second key aspect of control in the workplace is job security. Peter Warr, a British professor who has extensively studied job happiness, identifies a sense of job security as one of the twelve most important keys to worker happiness. Worrying about whether the next slip to cross your desk will be pink, it seems, is incompatible with happiness. Nothing is really secure in this world except the prospect of death and taxes (and perhaps, therefore, the jobs of probate and tax attorneys), so all levels of job security are relative. Relatively speaking, however, lawyers in large firms may feel their jobs are less secure than those in smaller firms. Your job in a two-hundred-person firm might well depend upon the whim of a single supervising attorney, the decision whether your firm merges with another mega-firm, or whether an important account picks up and leaves. Although smaller firms also have job security issues, notably attracting enough business to stay afloat, colleagues who know you well are less likely to show you the door.\n\nA third aspect of workplace control depends on believing that your contribution matters. As Daniel Gilbert succinctly notes, \"Mattering makes us happy.\" Unfortunately, this sense of mattering through one's work is relatively rare today. Punset observes, \"What now prevails is a growing feeling of powerlessness to influence the product, the company, society, or what is going on in the rest of the world.\"\n\nA sense of mattering, in turn, has varied sources. It can come from supervisors or colleagues praising your work, or at least letting you know that what you did was important. It can come from your clients\u2014their sense of relief (and, one hopes, gratitude) from winning a favorable verdict, having a deal close successfully, or getting that speeding violation off of their motor vehicle record. Study after study shows job feedback to be critical to happiness on the job. Not all feedback is equally likely to produce happiness, of course. The most unambiguous feedback is generally the most appreciated. When we're doing something wrong, we prefer to know exactly what that is, so we have the best chance of making the necessary adjustments.\n\nNot all law jobs are equally likely to produce a sense of mattering. The ABA's 2007 survey of lawyer satisfaction found that public sector lawyers, the group most satisfied with their professional lives, were also the lawyers most likely to feel appreciated in the workplace. Seventy percent of all public sector lawyers felt that way.\n\nA sense of mattering can also have an internal source. You might know\u2014and no one needs to tell you, but it wouldn't hurt\u2014that what you do has real consequences for real people you care about. It's when we don't give a damn what happens to the people affected by our work, or don't see our work as affecting anyone in particular, that we grow dissatisfied. We want to feel our work has some purpose beyond simply bringing home the bacon. Some of us are more capable of realizing these internally generated rewards than others, who seem unhappy without recognition from other people.\n\nFinally, a sense of control can come from, not surprisingly, the number of opportunities in the workplace to control things. These things can relate to the content and timetable for a work product. Lawyers tend to feel happier when they can decide which file to pick up and which to put on the back burner, which paragraph should be deleted to reduce the brief to the maximum length allowed by the court, or who should be deposed this Tuesday and who the following week. People in first-chairs in the courtroom are generally happier than those in the third-chair.\n\nUnfortunately for lawyer happiness, our adversarial system of justice places the parties, and not you, in ultimate control of cases. You might want to settle and get the stinking file off your desk, but that's not acceptable to your client bent on a measure of justice. You might think a paragraph you wrote in a contract was a stroke of brilliance, but your client might think otherwise and want it out. You might want to spend a day leisurely exploring an interesting angle of your client's civil case, but your client might not have the deepest of pockets and wants to reign in your billable hours. The system is what it is, and you are never going to have the freedom of a novelist. Accept what you cannot change, as the serenity prayer urges.\n\nFinally, personal control also means the ability to alter one's work environment. Is it okay to put a valued family photograph on your wall? Will anyone complain if you bring in a comfortable chair, move your desk, or change the lighting in your office? The more power you are given to affect your own working environment, the happier you will be. One commentator notes, \"Small freedoms... are very good for satisfaction.\"\n\n#### GETTING CONTROL\n\nIf control in its many senses is so central to happiness, then giving lawyers more control over their work lives should be one of the highest priorities\u2014maybe _the_ highest priority\u2014for a firm. Work-life balance issues, according to ABA surveys, are a leading cause of stress among lawyers. More generally, the tilt toward long workplace hours in the United States may explain why happiness levels in this country have stagnated since 1975 while rising in increasingly laid-back Europe. While the average American puts in about 2,000 hours a year at work, the average Dane, Italian, or German works less than 1,700 hours a year. Working 15 percent fewer hours, and spending the additional time socializing or beachcombing, could give a much-needed happiness boost.\n\nFor some workaholics, however, dialing back the hours at the office might actually increase distress. As psychologist Jerome Kagan notes, once people establish an association between hard work and rewards, it is hard to break. For the person whose diligence paid off first with a good college experience and then with the landing of a high-paying job, the link between work and reward might have become hard-wired.\n\nOne good thing about law firms is that they are filled with smart people. People who are certainly bright enough to identify ways, beyond the first step of reducing the required number of billable hours, to give lawyers in the firm a better sense of control. Depending on the firm's goals and economic situation, a wide variety of changes might be considered. A partial list might include offering flexibility in hours and work location, allowing lawyers to bring children to the office, providing lawyers flexibility in choosing clients and work assignments, letting lawyers choose how they approach and complete work products, and encouraging lawyers to alter their personal work environments\u2014lighting, hangings, furniture\u2014to suit their own taste and work style.\n\nIf you are a lawyer whose firm seems unable or unwilling to give you the control you need, a change of jobs might be the best option. The firm down the street might accept your proposal to shift to part-time work or a more flexible schedule. A smaller firm might promise you greater control of your work product and work environment. Of course, a solo practice offers the maximum degree of control\u2014perhaps even too much control, if promotion and marketing is not your strong suit. In short, consider what aspects of control are most important to you, and then determine where you are most likely to gain it. Control of your life is just too important to give up without a fight.\n\n### IT COULD BE WORSE: THE JOY OF DOWNWARD COMPARISON\n\nMax, who knows barely half of what you do about corporate law, commands a gorgeous view of the Quatzawatamie River from his corner office. You look out over the backside of the Acme Building. Jane, who didn't even make law review at Middlebrow, earns $10,000 more per year than you\u2014you, the former articles editor at a law school that _U.S. News & World Report_ proclaims to be one of the five finest in the land. These things gnaw at you. The injustice of it all! How can the firm's managing committee be so clueless? You'd prefer to focus on the tasks at hand (that memo on _Snerk v. Google_ needs to get out soon), but your mind returns to that corner office or that extra ten grand that should be yours.\n\nYou are suffering the pains that come from upward comparisons.\n\nSometimes, it turns out, finishing worse is actually better. Researchers evaluating the happiness of Olympic medal winners discovered that bronze medalists generally were happier with their finishes than were silver medalists. Why? The silver medalists tended to compare themselves with gold medalists, the athletes who achieved the goal they long sought; bronze medalists, on the other hand, were just happy to be on the medal stand, thinking about how close they came to joining all those other hard-working athletes who failed to medal at all.\n\nThe acerbic social commentator H. L. Mencken observed, \"A wealthy man is one who makes $100 more than his wife's sister's husband.\" We seem to understand that happiness depends less on income than how we're doing compared to the Joneses. Asked whether they would prefer to have an income of $50,000 when the average is $25,000 or an income of $100,000 when the average is $250,000, most persons polled chose the first condition. Everyone knows that $100,000 will buy a better standard of living than half that much, but being _relatively_ well-off is seen as clearly superior to being _relatively_ poor. We are okay without that sixty-inch plasma screen so long as most of our neighbors don't have one either.\n\nAs we indicated in chapter 2, earnings have little to do with happiness once they rise above middle-income levels. When per capita incomes in the United States shot up 300 percent from 1970 to 1990, there was no increase in the happiness of Americans. Money really can't buy much happiness.\n\nRelative income, however, matters much more to people than absolute income. Being in a higher social class _does_ correlate with increased levels of reported happiness. The nonincome benefits of being in a higher social class, such as increased status in workplaces and leisure places, seem to make people happier. People who perceive themselves as being in lower social classes are people who most often make upward comparisons\u2014and get grumpy when they do. It grates to see their neighbors and colleagues doing much better financially than they are. In the terminology of British economist Richard Layard, the wealthy spew a \"social pollution\" that incites toxic envy among those around them. A _New Yorker_ cartoon, showing a mid-level executive in a supervisor's office, makes the point. Standing at his boss's desk, the employee is saying: \"O.K., if you can't see your way to giving me a pay raise, how about giving Parkinson a pay cut?\" It should be no surprise that the egalitarian nations of Scandinavia, where social class is largely a nonissue, consistently rank among the happiest countries on the planet\u2014with Scandinavian residents reporting significantly higher happiness levels than U.S. residents. (Proving Shakespeare wrong, Denmark is about the least melancholy place on earth\u2014it appears either at or next to the top of list in the most recent polls of happiness levels.)\n\nWhether the question is the amount of compensation, the size of offices, or plum case assignments, it is human nature to compare our situation with those around us. When we compare ourselves to persons better off than us, we are unhappy because, as Sonja Lyubomirsky observes, \"You can't be envious and happy at the same time.\" On the other hand, if we find our fate better than our comparison group we tend to be happier. So happiness turns in part on the group we choose for comparison. Bigger fish in smaller ponds really do turn out to be happier\u2014consider that the next time you are deciding where to go for a swim.\n\nOf course, it is no simple matter. You cannot just choose a group to downward compare against and then get happier. To some extent, our genetics and our upbringing will force comparisons\u2014either upward or downward\u2014on us. Nonetheless, we are not powerless to affect our choice of comparison groups. We tend to compare ourselves most against persons with whom we spend a lot of time, so by hanging around those less fortunate than ourselves, we set up more opportunities for downward comparisons.\n\nWe spend a lot of time working, especially Americans who work longer hours than people in just about any other country. Who we choose to work with, and who we choose to work for, are choices. We could have been undertakers or roofers or nurses or architects. We chose to be lawyers. Moreover, we decide to be small-town lawyers or big-city lawyers, immigration lawyers or securities lawyers, solo practitioners or associates in three-hundred-member firms.\n\nSurvey data suggest, as previously noted, we might well have been happier had we chosen one of the nurturing occupations: social work, nursing, physical or mental therapy, or Peace Corps work. The higher-than-average happiness levels reported by people with those jobs most likely has a lot to do with the opportunities those occupations afford for downward comparisons: \"I might have problems and my pay is low, but I'm not a single mom on drugs, quadriplegic, crazy, or stuck in a malaria-infested third-world nation for the rest of my life.\" People with those jobs are more inclined than the rest of us to see their own lives as half-full bottles, not half-empty ones.\n\nAll this suggests one way in which lawyers might increase job satisfaction: begin spending more time working for clients who have at least a few more problems than you do. Along with the positive feeling that comes with helping acts, you're likely to come home feeling better about where life has taken you. Yes, there is some status that comes with churning out the billable hours for zillionaires who want a few more zillions than the next zillionaire\u2014but odds are you'll be a little happier helping Farmer McDonald save the family back forty from the I.R.S., helping that well-intentioned Latin family obtain citizenship, or making sure that the little boy crushed by the falling anvil will get his medical expenses paid for by ABC Anvil Company (or whatever negligent bastard let loose the anvil.) On the whole, careers in elder law, social security law, personal injury law, and immigration law\u2014where you can make a direct contribution to other people's lives\u2014produce more job satisfaction than careers spent defending companies whose sole goal is to maximize profits. Somebody has to defend pyramid schemers and monopolists, but it doesn't have to be you.\n\nThere's another way to increase the likelihood of downward instead of upward comparisons. You could become the proverbial bigger fish in the smaller pool. Because size is relative, you'll feel bigger in the small pool and feel just a little happier when you think of yourself swimming along with all those smaller-finned creatures. Instead of taking that higher paying job at the prestigious firm of Thurston, Howell & Gilligan, how about accepting that slightly less lucrative offer from the seven-person firm in your hometown? If you really want to build a life of it in Metropolis, you still have an array of choices\u2014and you don't have to opt for the one that would most impress your fellow alums at the next law school reunion. You might be less smug once every five years, but happier day-to-day as the go-to lawyer in the somewhat less power-lunching firm. Sure, you might also have moments of daydreaming misery when you imagine the good life (which isn't really that good) of classmates in those high-paying prestigious jobs, but you're not getting corner-office envy every time you trot to the water cooler.\n\nThere's one last way of increasing the likelihood of downward comparisons, at least for those lucky enough to be in a firm that provides such opportunities. You can volunteer for pro bono work that will increase your contact with persons whose problems seem vastly larger than your own. Survey data show that increased pro bono work correlates with increased levels of happiness. Besides, the volunteer work you do is likely to be a departure from your typical tasks, and the data is clear that when we look at back at life from our rocking chairs a few decades hence, the odds are much greater that we will regret more the things we didn't do than the things we did. Do good, and be happy.\n\n### REAPING THE REWARDS OF RELATIONSHIPS: IT'S THE PEOPLE, STUPID\n\nWithout social connections it's next to impossible to be happy. In fact, according to one happiness expert, about 70 percent of our controllable happiness stems from relationships. We could debate whether control or connections is _the most important_ determinant of happiness levels, but there is little disagreement that they are the two biggies. We not only define ourselves in terms of our social ties, we also derive much of the meaning in our lives from those ties.\n\nIt should come as no surprise that your fellow human beings can be a source of happiness. People need people. Ever since writers have been putting words on papyrus, the praises of close relationships have been sung. \"Of all the things that wisdom provides to help one live one's entire life in happiness,\" wrote the Greek philosopher Epicurus, \"the greatest by far is friendship.\"\n\nNext to sex, socializing is the activity that makes us happiest. Interaction with friends gives us the biggest happiness boost, followed by time spent with spouses and children. We do not, as a general rule, enjoy interaction with co-workers and clients quite as much as our time with close friends and family, but it still beats\u2014by a wide margin, according to a survey of workers\u2014interaction with supervisors and, especially, time alone on the job. Most people like to be in contact with others much of the time, and for the 75 percent of Americans who are extroverts, this is especially true. Contact with others, both in quantity and quality, has been identified as one of the twelve factors most important to job happiness. This explains why one of the reasons that losing a job is so devastating: it severs the relationships with co-workers.\n\nAlthough socializing is our most common pleasure-inducing activity, working ranks near the bottom on the same scale. Working falls below exercising, eating, shopping, worshipping, watching television, and even (believe it or not) housework. Among daily activities involving significant amounts of time, only commuting makes us less happy than working. If socializing makes us very happy and working does not, one might wonder whether the workplaces that provide the most opportunities for interaction\u2014even if the interaction is less satisfying than raising toasts  with your buddies on a Friday night\u2014tend to be the happiest? It turns out that they are.\n\n#### CAN LAWYERS CONNECT?\n\nThe workplaces that produce the highest levels of happiness tend to be those where workers deal directly with other people. The deeper the connections between co-workers or people served on the job, the happier a worker generally is. When it comes to recruiting new associates, law firms understand the critical role that positive interaction with co-workers plays. As a summer intern, you are feasted, trotted out to luxury suites in ballparks, toasted in pubs, loaded into kayaks, and provided with a host of other bonding opportunities. Too often, unfortunately, when you join the associate ranks, the tool that worked so well to make you happy as an intern is forgotten.\n\nThe depth of job-related relationships may explain why, when 27,500 randomly selected people were asked to rate their jobs, the happiest of occupations turned out to be the clergy. Two of every three clergy reported being \"very happy\" as opposed to an average of just one out of three for all workers. One key reason for high levels of happiness among clergy is the opportunities the job provides for close personal connections. Jackson W. Carroll, a professor at the Duke Divinity School, had this explanation for the poll results: \"A pastor does get called on to enter into some of the deepest moments of a person's life, celebrating a birth and sitting with people at times of illness or death. There's a lot of fulfillment.\"\n\nLawyers rarely find it within their job description to celebrate a client's newborn or hold hands with a client on her deathbed. Clients often do, however, call on lawyers during periods of difficulty and crisis\u2014as any divorce, personal injury, probate, or criminal lawyer could attest. These encounters can sometimes be intense. They probably do not produce the same happiness benefits as the clergy experiences during important passages because the lawyer and the minister have different goals. The minister focuses on establishing a bond that can enhance the church member's sense of peace and well-being. The lawyer, in contrast, usually aims at meeting a more immediate, and often monetary, goal of the client. Those lawyers who develop personal bonds with clients, even while serving clients' pressing legal needs, tend to be happier lawyers than those who do not. Lawyers in public service positions report higher career satisfaction levels than other lawyers, and part of the reason might well be the greater client contact those jobs usually afford.\n\n#### EVERYBODY NEEDS SOMEBODY SOMETIME\n\nFor many who practice law, the deeper connections established in the workplace are likely to be with fellow lawyers rather than with clients. The quality of those connections is closely linked to our happiness. Everyone longs to belong. We want to be welcomed into a tribe and learn the secret handshake; we want to be accepted. It is not surprising, therefore, that we seek to spend time \"with people who like us and are like us.\" If your law firm colleagues share your interests and values, and they enjoy your company, you are more likely to be among the lawyers reporting themselves to be happy. The odds increase further if your firm is one that doesn't think building human connections is just for summer recruiting but instead provides numerous opportunities for interaction with colleagues, whether through collaborative work projects, brown bag conversations in the lunch room, or office parties and firm softball games. Robert Putnam observed in his important book, _Bowling Alone_ , that social connections are fraying in our cocooning modern world. The more a firm can do to rebuild some of these connections, the better it and its workers are likely to be for it.\n\nYou can do your part for the bonding process. Expressing gratitude has been shown to be especially rewarding, both for you and the person on the receiving end. Whenever a colleague offers helpful advice, performs a favor, or just makes a contribution to the firm's greater good, let that person know their gesture was appreciated. Handwritten notes are better than e-mails.\n\nAn ABA survey of lawyers suggests than smaller firms are happier places than large firms. This finding is consistent with other survey data involving nonlawyers and the size of workplaces. Smaller is usually better. But why?\n\nThe answer likely has a lot to do with trust. Survey after survey show trust is critical to happiness. Loss of trust in a personal relationship, such as might come with awareness that a spouse is having an affair, is devastating. Workers who trust their co-workers tend to be happiest.\n\nAmong all nations, the ones where citizens have the most trust in their government and their fellow citizens\u2014including Denmark and Switzerland, the world's two happiest countries\u2014are also the happiest. The quality of a society seems to have a much greater effect on personal happiness than an individual's specific role in that society. What goes for countries probably goes for workplaces as well. Where a sense of trust exists, workers are most likely to be happy.\n\nSmaller workplaces are more conducive to trust building than large workplaces. Trust is something that develops over time. It comes from positive engagement, especially when co-workers share stories and keep their promises. In a large firm setting, where you might not work on two projects in a year with the same colleague, trust can't develop as it can in a smaller workplace with more regular interaction between colleagues.\n\nObviously, however, small firms are not for everyone. If, for financial reasons or reasons relating to specialized expertise, only larger firms are viable options, then investigate the quality and quantity of interaction the firm will afford. Find out whether the firm has a high turnover rate\u2014high turnover makes it next to impossible to build trust. Try to determine whether you are likely to spend the majority of time in \"a firm within a firm\"\u2014working as a member of practice group with a specific mission and a nonrotating set of colleagues. Learn about firm culture: Do lawyers know each other's names? Do lawyers and staff hit it off? How common are water cooler conversations, retreats, collaborative work, group lunches, and social events? Does the firm provide a sense of play? How much emphasis is there on billable hours? Clearly, some big firm experiences provide better interaction than others.\n\n### COMMIT\n\nA firm with satisfying levels of interaction that promote trust will, over time, produce another great good. It will allow you to feel a sense of commitment to the larger enterprise. Without commitment, you're mostly just spending time. You cannot, it has been noted, love either a person or a place or a job with a foot out the door. Just as with marriage or other long-term love, career satisfaction over the long haul requires adjustments and compromises.\n\nLawyer career coach Hindi Greenberg deals often with mid-career boredom: \"The first couple of years, it's exciting to say, 'I'm a lawyer.' You carry a big briefcase and even the minutiae are new and exciting. But then the routine sets in.\" In addition to trying to do more of what they do like at work, Greenberg advises lawyers to make \"a change in attitude\": look at \"the glass as half-full\" and \"get over it.\"\n\nNo job is perfect. Lawyers spend a lot of time reviewing documents, filing motions, and pushing paper or electronic files. Newly appointed Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor reminds us, \"The vast majority of lawyering is drudgery work\u2014it's sitting in a library, it's banging out a brief, it's talking to clients for endless hours.\" Irritations sometimes crowd out satisfaction. When this happens, remind yourself what it is you really like about your job. Make a list, and see if that helps elevate your mood. Still, if you are like most people, there will be days when you think you'd rather be working somewhere else. But wondering whether the grass is greener on the other side of the hill (or office tower) comes at a cost. Besides diminishing the possibility of love, if that's a word you can wrap your head around in the job context, there are other costs associated with being in a perpetual job hunt. You can't really relax, for one thing. A multitude of job opportunities can leave you feeling overwhelmed\u2014\"So many to investigate, so little time.\" And all that time checking out other career options is time taken away from your family, friends, and favorite leisure activities.\n\nThere comes a time in life when you really should enjoy what you've achieved. Commitment is a big and serious word that we spend the first two or three decades of life running from\u2014but deep satisfaction comes to those who are able to embrace it.\n\n### FINDING THE FLOW\n\nWhen does time fly for you?\n\nThe sense of time flying comes when we are so absorbed in an activity that it crowds out the worries and self-consciousness that dog so much of our existence. The activities that absorb vary with our individual skills and interests. For some, time flies when they are rock climbing. For others, time whizzes by during a round of golf. For others still, minutes race during a foot-stomping guitar set with their neighborhood band. What all these activities provide, for someone with the right skills and interest, are stretching experiences\u2014or creative challenges.\n\nWhen everything is going just right, and the challenge is enough to test our skills and demand our attention but not so daunting as to produce anxiety, we are in what has been called in positive psychology circles \"a flow experience.\" The term \"flow\" is most associated with Mihalyi Csikszentmihalyi who defined flow as \"a dynamic state that characterizes consciousness when experience is attended to for its own sake.\" It is a state where \"action and awareness are merged.\" Athletes recall fondly their flow experiences, typically speaking of times they were \"in the zone.\" During a flow experience we are in the _now_ , not the past or the present\u2014and utterly mindful. Of course, over time, thoughts of the past (that critical comment a partner made about my last memo) and future (will I finish the brief in time to join the gang for lunch?) assert themselves and the flow ebbs. It is probably more accurate to say that we can experience various degrees of flow experiences, with true flow being their shortlived essence.\n\nIt is not entirely accurate to say we are _happy_ during flow experiences. We're so focused on the task at hand that where the dial is on our personal happiness meter seems irrelevant. Moreover, if we interrupt our flow experience to consider the question of how happy we are at the present moment, we almost certainly become markedly less happy and lose our sense of flow. When we are feeling the flow we are living actively in the present and living intensely. Is that being happy? Perhaps. Asked afterward to reflect on our flow experience, most of us would probably describe the activity as fulfilling, engaging, even fun\u2014but we'd pause before characterizing our feelings at the time because the one thing we know is that we were not thinking about our feelings. When you're intensely focused on making contact with that high-velocity serve of your opponent, you have no time to think about how happy or sad you are\u2014and that's the beauty of it.\n\nWhen asked about flow experiences, we are likely to draw examples from nonwork related activities such as athletics, outdoor recreation, hobbies, playing music, or writing poetry. Yet the characteristics of flow experiences can be found in workplace tasks as well.\n\nWhat are the features of an activity that might cause it to induce a flow experience? First, it has to be an activity that requires you to apply a skill that you have, or at least one you think you have. Self-delusion seems to be sufficient here. Second, the demands on the skill must not be so great as to produce anxiety yet must be sufficient to avoid the boredom that accompanies less-demanding tasks. As a colleague of ours notes, \"It's no fun to play tennis with someone who can't return your serve, but it's also no fun to play tennis with someone whose serve you can't return.\" Third, there must be clear goals so that the direction of your activity is not in doubt. Fourth, the activity should be one that frees you from the flights of mind and distractions that accompany the more humdrum experiences of life. It helps if there is a mystery or unresolved question that will be unraveled or answered by your efforts. The mind far prefers puzzles to certainties. Finally, the activity should be one that is not interrupted by phone calls, police sirens, bathroom breaks, daydreams, or sports score searches on espn.com. A flow activity has our full attention.\n\nFlow is not the first thing to come to mind when we consider our work as lawyers. Most hours in law firms are occupied with nonflow experiences such as answering e-mails, filling out billing forms, or digging around in files for an elusive document that suddenly has become important. It's worth asking, however, when work time does, more or less\u2014it's not a magic carpet ride\u2014fly. If you are a fire-in-your-belly trial lawyer, it might come when you cross-examine that key witness or reach the final flourish in your closing argument or ponder how to use your last precious preemptory challenge in jury selection. If you are a transactional attorney, it might be the eureka moment when you see a path to contract language that might spare your client costly litigation and months of potential worry. If you are a law professor, flow might come when classroom discussion gets buzzing and light bulbs go on amidst that sea of student desks. If you are a lawyer who takes pride in writing skills, flow can come in the simple task of putting one clear and significant sentence after another on a page. Flow is where we find it, given our own skills, interests, and goals.\n\nWe all want more flow. It might not be synonymous with happiness, but we recognize that it's pretty darn good. To get more flow, it helps to seek out more of those work experiences that have provided it the past. Take stock of those activities during your workday that give you a sense of flow and find a way to do them more often. If planning the firm retreat last year provided flow experiences, volunteer to do it again. Work more, if possible, with colleagues who you find engage your interest and challenge your intellectual skills. If trials do it for you, do more trials. Lose hours when writing appellate briefs? Then find a way to write more briefs. Needless to say, not all our hours will flow by like the Columbia (some chores are boring, but still have to get done), but improving the ratio of flow hours to nonflow hours should be every lawyer's goal.\n\nResearch tells us that some work conditions are more likely to produce flow experiences than others. Jobs with variety in tasks are better than jobs without. Offices and work spaces with views of outdoor life (especially with natural beauty) are more conducive to flow experiences than spaces without windows or with views of brick walls or vacant lots. Jobs with novelty are better than jobs without. Jobs without frequent interruptions, and work environments that are free from excessive noise, are better than work places with noise and other distractions.\n\nPuzzles are especially good at increasing the odds of a flow experience. Puzzles can come in many forms and still perform the trick. If we have a problem that offers no obvious solution, yet is a problem that we believe we have the skills to solve, there's a good chance that \"the flow\" will soon be with us. Puzzle-solving demands our attention. There's another bonus with puzzles, too: when we solve a puzzle, we garner a little happiness reward at the end\u2014that same sort of positive reinforcement that basketball players experience when their shots swish through the nylon net.\n\nThe practice of law, thankfully, affords numerous puzzles. How do we avoid enough estate tax to allow our client to keep the family farm in the family? How do we get a particularly helpful fact before the jury without exposing our witness to damaging impeachment? What case holds the key to convincing an appellate court to finding in my client's favor? The list goes on and on\u2014if you can't think of any puzzle in your work that gives you any pleasure to solve, you're undoubtedly in the wrong line of work.\n\nWe can become happy for good reasons, bad reasons, or neutral reasons. Helping others brings happiness for a good reason. Becoming happy because a romantic rival has just contracted a life-threatening disease is a bad reason. Becoming happy because you're passively consuming an enjoyable piece of fluff entertainment is a neutral reason. Flow, if it can be said to bring happiness (and we'd argue that it _does_ ), is almost always happiness for a good reason.\n\n### LEARNING FROM THE HAPPINESS (OR UNHAPPINESS) OF OTHERS\n\nYou think you know what will make you happy? You're most likely wrong. That is one of the principal lessons Gilbert offered in his bestseller, _Stumbling on Happiness_. Piling study on study until it can scarcely be doubted, Gilbert demonstrates how remarkably inept human beings are at predicting their own future levels of happiness. Our imaginations fail us when we try to picture what life would be like for us in new situations.\n\nWe think we will be as happy as a lark five years after we win the lottery. We won't be. We think life will be all downhill after we lose a limb in an automobile accident. It won't be. Far better than we imagine, we learn to adapt after setbacks. And far sooner than we think, the initial jolt of happiness brought on by a surprising success dissipates as we run on the hedonic treadmill.\n\nWe make numerous assumptions about happiness that aren't accurate. We think we'll be much happier if we move to California than Iowa, but it turns out that we aren't. We imagine how much we'll enjoy the mountains and beaches of the Golden State, but we forget about the horrendous traffic congestion and the higher cost of living. We think Iowa will be duller than cornflakes, but it turns out we'll find good friends and realize that there's some culture on the prairie after all. We fail to think about the vast majority of our time that won't be spent sunning in the sand or swooshing down slopes, including all that time stuck in traffic or groaning at the tab in an overpriced restaurant.\n\nOne cannot review Gilbert's mountain of research without gaining a little humility. We really don't have much of a clue as to what will make us happy. Asked what one thing could make them happier, Americans say \"money,\" according to a recent University of Michigan study. A worse answer could scarcely be imagined, from what a consistent body of happiness research shows. But there it is: Americans think more money is the key to future happiness.\n\nIf our imaginations are grossly deficient in predicting our future happiness, what can we do? Gilbert says he has the answer: \"Surrogation is the best way to predict if we'll be happy.\" We should \"observe how happy people are in different situations,\" he suggests. The best source of information about the future is other people who are presently experiencing events that we are contemplating experiencing. Chances are that our own happiness in those different situations will approximate those of the people we observe. Human beings are much more alike than they are different; we all tend to be made happy by the same sorts of things\u2014connections with other people, a sense of control, a sense of mattering. If a situation we observe has enough of those happiness contributors, it's likely to produce happy campers\u2014someone else today, perhaps us tomorrow.\n\nA recent experiment involving speed dating provides surprising evidence as to just how powerful a tool surrogation can be. Researchers set out to discover whether examination of a prospective date's personal profile and photograph was a better predictor of how much a subject would enjoy a five-minute speed date than the single report of another woman who previously participated in a speed date with the same prospect. Even though most of the women believed that they individually would be a better judge of how well they would enjoy the five-minute speed date based on the profile and photograph, they actually \"made more accurate predictions about how much they would enjoy a date with a man when they knew how much another woman in their social network enjoyed dating the man than when they read the man's personal profile and saw his photograph.\" The researchers concluded that although information from surrogates may produce a better affective forecast, people will tend to underutilize surrogation because they mistakenly think their own mental simulation will be more accurate.\n\nWhat works for dating also works for career shopping. \"Snooping in on other people's lives\" gives us our best shot at an accurate prediction of the workplaces and types of work that will make us happiest as lawyers. Our learning from the experience of others should come from observation. Asking another person if they like their job won't do. Most everyone says that they like their jobs, and their answers have virtually no bearing on how good their job actually is.\n\nObservation requires getting off your posterior. For practicing lawyers, this means taking mental notes on lawyers you interact with. If you're looking for a job, you might be better able to put yourself in a variety of workplaces. Visit courtrooms, law offices, judge's chambers, law schools, press conferences, administrative hearing rooms\u2014visit any place you can see lawyers acting as lawyers. Talk to any lawyers you can about their professional lives. How happy do they seem to be? Remember, of course, that happiness only rarely will be shown by laughs and big smiles. Happiness might be revealed by the focused attention of a lawyer engaged in a flow experience. The negative signs, the signs of unhappiness, will probably be at least as revealing as the positive signs. Boredom is hard to hide. Stress shows. So do anger and distraction.\n\nHaving said all this about there really being no substitute for observation, is there still something helpful that survey data can tell us about what workplaces produce the happiest lawyers? Yes, but the survey data are ambiguous. They come loaded with qualifiers. Make the best you can of it, and then go boldly out into the real world of lawyering with open eyes and an attentive mind.\n\n### KNOWING YOURSELF CAN MAKE YOU HAPPIER: IDENTIFYING YOUR PLEASURES AND YOUR STRENGTHS\n\n#### IDENTIFYING PLEASURES\n\nThe idea is so simple that you would think everyone would do it: Reflect on what things you like to do, then resolve to do them more often. Yet this most direct of all paths to a happier life is rarely taken. Instead, our daily activities are determined more by our _wants_ \u2014and wants turn out to have relatively little to do with happiness.\n\nAt first blush, it might seem that what we want is what is likely to make us happy. But evolution has designed us to be competitive creatures and to seek out the prizes that come from competition rather than activities that give us pleasure. We strive to get the promotion, to earn more money to get the biggest house on the block, or to acquire the firm's most high profile clients. We believe, more than ever before, that being financially well-off is an important key to happiness, despite study after study showing only a modest correlation between the two.\n\nMake a list of the activities that give you pleasure, large or small. Your list might include reading the morning paper in your bathrobe, playing doubles tennis or games of Scrabble by the fire with a couple of old friends, traveling to new places, or having beers with office mates after work on Fridays. Take special care to identify the small pleasures that occur each day. They may be something as seemingly insignificant as a moment of rest by a sunny window in the late afternoon or a cup of that really good coffee from the caf\u00e9. Now, if at all possible (it's hard to make more Fridays, but maybe you could also have lunch with co-workers on Tuesdays?), do the things on your list more often. What could be simpler?\u2014and you'll be happier. Recent research from the University of North Carolina backs this conclusion up. When people appreciate the daily \"micro-moments\" of happiness, those \"positive emotions blossom\"\u2014and help people develop resilience against adverse events. As Lyubomirsky counsels, \"Enjoy little things, for one day you may look back and realize that they were the big things.\"\n\nIn the context of your law job, unfortunately, things might _not_ be quite so simple. You might love making closing arguments to juries, but you cannot just decide to give more closing speeches and go do it. Giving more closing arguments requires taking more cases to juries\u2014and taking every case to a jury hardly serves your clients' interests. It might also mean doing more of something you do not like, such as pulling all-nighters preparing for examination of key witnesses. Still, there are likely to be certain pleasurable tasks on the job that can get more of your time without any obvious downside. Whatever it is you love to do\u2014whether it is \"rainmaking,\" searching LexisNexis, planning firm parties, deposing witnesses\u2014if you are any good at it, perhaps you can do more of it. Of course, you still must meet whatever other expectations your colleagues have for you, but the evidence is compelling that by doing more of what you most enjoy doing, you will become at least a little happier.\n\n#### IDENTIFYING STRENGTHS\n\nThree questions deserve your attention: What activities give you meaning? What activities give you pleasure? What activities allow you to exercise your personal strengths? The jobs with the greatest long-term satisfaction are those that provide a source for each of these three activities.\n\nIdentifying your strengths is no harder than identifying what gives you pleasure. If, ever since kindergarten, teachers have told you that you work well with others, you probably do. On the other hand, if every written project you've ever submitted came back filled with scribbled critical margin notes (\"What's this mean?,\" \"Poor word choice!,\" \"Bad organization!\"), writing is probably not your strength. The list of possible strengths is long and varied. It runs the gamut from being a great proofreader to having the empathy necessary to really connect with jurors in personal injury cases. List your strengths. Think hard about what jobs allow you to exercise those strengths. Happiness correlates with being good at what you do and having the feeling of control that comes with professional competence. Seligman argues that people who find jobs that allow them to use their strengths stand a greater chance of deriving the \"authentic happiness\" that is the most erosion-resistant of all forms of happiness.\n\nWhether law provides opportunities that lie at the intersection of your values, pleasures, and strengths is a question only you can answer. But it is a very important question. You should try to answer it and find the job (if one exists) that offers all three in the best proportions. You're almost guaranteed to be happier if you do.\n\n### FINDING A JOB THAT ALIGNS WITH YOUR VALUES: FOLLOWING YOUR HEART\n\nIf you could pick your clients' legal causes, what would they be? The ones you fight for now, or some entirely different set? If you're like most lawyers, many of the legal battles you wage on behalf of clients concern matters that are of little significance beyond the parties. Sure, an indifferent or bad cause pays as well (often better) than a good cause, but we'd be happier if we earned our bread in some other way. Poet, lawyer, and Librarian of Congress Archibald MacLeish wrote that he knew it was time for a different line of work when he lost the ability to care very much \"whether $900,000 belongs this way or that.\"\n\nThe happiest lawyers tend to be those who do work that they think make the world at least a marginally better place. Law professor Deborah Rhode, one of the nation's leading experts on the legal profession, states that attorneys experience \"the _greatest_ source of disappointment in practice\" when they feel that they are not contributing to the public good.\n\nUnlike some other sources of lawyer unhappiness, feelings about not serving a larger social purpose come from a choice you made. No one forced you to take the job with the fancy downtown firm with its list of well-heeled clients. You could have taken a job with the county prosecutor or the public defender (which one would have given you a sense of contributing to society's betterment depends upon your own views on law, order, and justice.) Maybe that dream job with the Justice Department or the Sierra Club wasn't going to happen, but there probably was _something_ out there that would have aligned better with your own values than the job you took. If you have sympathies that run to the little guy, perhaps a job in a personal injury plaintiff's. firm would have been a good fit. On the other hand, if you believe, as did President Coolidge, \"the business of America is business,\" corporate law or a job as corporate counsel might have been a surer route to a happier practice. What are _your_ values?\n\nIf you cannot readily answer the question that ended the last paragraph, make a list of people, causes, and things you pay attention to. (And, if you don't pay attention to _anything_ , get some professional help, because only attentive people have a clear shot at long-lasting happiness.) You might pay attention to some things that you'd rather not tell your mother about\u2014craps tables, pornography, bongs carved by hand. Cross them off the list. You might pay attention to other things that provide personal pleasure but hardly seem substantial in the big scheme of things\u2014your favorite football team or rock band. Cross them off too. Look at what's left on the list. It could be the environment, your family, gay rights, free trade, or the homeless. Now, think hard: What can lawyers do to aid your cause, and where do you find the lawyers who provide that aid? Go look for them. Beg to work for them. Honest passion sometimes pays off.\n\nIf you work at something you care about, you are much more likely to be happy. One reason for the higher satisfaction among public sector attorneys relates to their greater success in achieving a desired work-life balance, but another key factor is that they care about the causes they work for. A job that aligns with your values allows you to emotionally connect with your work. \"Without emotion,\" as Punset reminds us, \"no project is worth its salt.\"\n\nWe can't all work to save endangered species or defend civil liberties; most lawyers work in the private sector. In some private firms, pro bono opportunities provide a source of serving the public good that might not come from the firm's usual run of clients. Pro bono work has been clearly linked to increased self-esteem among lawyers. As one attorney sold on its benefits put it, pro bono work is an \"enormous morale booster for the entire firm.... No office parties or picnics could give you that.\" A side-benefit of pro bono work is that it improves the profession's decidedly poor reputation among the public. A survey suggested that two-thirds of persons surveyed would think more highly of lawyers if they engaged in more pro bono work.\n\nWhat is true for lawyers is true for persons in other lines of work. Professions that involve helping others rank high in general happiness. To be more precise, occupations that allow workers to _think_ they are helping others do well in happiness rankings. The fact that the help provided might seem rather modest in the eyes of those outside the profession is of little matter. Gilbert notes that often when a job doesn't provide an obvious sense of meaning, people will figure out how to add it. As an example, he points to hairdressers who derive satisfaction from seeing themselves as key confidants of their clients. There's a lesson here for lawyers: If you don't presently see your job as making the world a better place, perhaps you could give the matter a bit more thought.\n\nThe perfect job is the one that lies at the intersection of our deeply held values, our personal strengths, and our pleasures. Rarely do people stumble into such jobs; to find these jobs requires a great deal of reflection about what truly matters to us, as well as what sorts of tasks test our strengths and give us the most pleasure.\n\n#### NOT ALL HAPPINESS IS CREATED EQUAL\n\nWe suggested at the outset that happiness has many meanings. There is the happiness of the moment, what Seligman called \"the giggles and pleasures and joys of life,\" but there is also the happiness that comes from commitment. Aristotle used the word \"eudaemonia\" (\"good spirit\") to describe the feeling that accompanies a life well spent: one of engagement and immersion in activities that contribute to a better society. True happiness to Aristotle comes not simply from feeling good, but from feeling good for good reasons\u2014a feeling that generally comes from _doing_ good.\n\nThe type of happiness that results from doing work that you find meaningful, after giving serious reflection to that question, is an especially resilient form of happiness. Fulfillment through important work is less prone to \"set-point reversion\" than other forms of happiness, such as the shorter-term happiness boosts that come from pay raises or promotions or captures of coveted corner offices. Being engaged in the good work of building a better world brings the sort of happiness that tends to sticks with you for a good, long while.\n\nEnhance your happiness by either finding a legal career that aligns with your values or, at a minimum, finding one that allows you to believe that you are somehow improving the world. If your job involves strictly fights over money, money that you really do not care goes to whom, then you're not likely\u2014in the long run\u2014to enjoy much job satisfaction. Commit to a cause you believe in and be happy.\n\n#### IT'S A TOOLBOX, NOT A RECIPE\n\nIt's the rare construction project that requires every tool in a toolbox, and it's the rare lawyer who could successfully adopt every one of the suggestions we've made in this chapter. Consider each tool and its possible application to your career. Use the ones that make sense for your situation and your skills and personality. Now, get to work building the framework for a more satisfying life in the law.\n\n#### WAYS TO BECOME A HAPPIER LAWYER\n\n1. Make sure your job is one that matters to you.\n\n\u2022 choose meaningful projects over busy work\n\n\u2022 try to become a key player in your firm and legal community\n\n2. Think about the way your job positively affects other people.\n\n\u2022 identify how your work has bettered lives\n\n3. Strive for a comfortable work-life balance.\n\n\u2022 be willing to sacrifice income if necessary (it won't matter)\n\n\u2022 consider telecommuting or \"5 days work in 4\" options\n\n\u2022 discuss work flexibility with sympathetic partners\n\n4. Work to make your job more secure.\n\n\u2022 know and become friends with those who control your fate\n\n\u2022 meet or exceed firm expectations\n\n\u2022 develop expertise in noncyclical or countercyclical areas\n\n5. Take control of your work product and work space.\n\n\u2022 set, when possible, a timetable for finishing work\n\n\u2022 develop your own strategy for meeting goals\n\n\u2022 personalize your work space with photos, art, etc.\n\n6. Connect with people.\n\n\u2022 work on collaborative projects when possible\n\n\u2022 eat lunch with colleagues or clients\n\n\u2022 participate in firm social events\n\n\u2022 seek help and offer feedback\n\n\u2022 praise colleagues who do good work\n\n\u2022 remember birthdays and write personal notes\n\n\u2022 choose face-to-face work when possible\n\n7. If happiness seems possible in your job, commit to that job.\n\n\u2022 don't always look for greener grass (water your own)\n\n\u2022 remind yourself what you really like about your job\n\n\u2022 trust those who earn it and remember that building trust takes lots of interaction\n\n8. Increase the frequency of your \"flow experiences.\"\n\n\u2022 think about projects that have \"made time fly\"\n\n\u2022 identify common characteristics of those projects\n\n\u2022 look for tasks that challenge you but are within your abilities\n\n\u2022 avoid, when possible, tasks that are so easy as to bore you\n\n\u2022 find a work setting where distractions are minimized\n\n\u2022 try to include a variety of tasks within your work day\n\n\u2022 work in places with natural light and views of nature\n\n9. Avoid making upward comparisons.\n\n\u2022 focus on internal goals, not keeping up with colleagues\n\n\u2022 remind yourself that money has little to do with happiness\n\n\u2022 choose, when possible, projects that benefit the less fortunate\n\n10. Find out what experiences have made other lawyers happy.\n\n\u2022 remember that people are more alike than different\n\n\u2022 talk with other lawyers and ask about their experiences\n\n\u2022 observe what seems to make other lawyers happy\n\n\u2022 choose jobs and projects that have made other lawyers happy\n\n11. Know your strengths and what gives you pleasure.\n\n\u2022 identify tasks and events that give you pleasure, and do them more often\n\n\u2022 recognize your strengths and find ways to use them\n\n12. Align your work with your values.\n\n\u2022 identify your values and look for work consistent with those values\n\n\u2022 consider volunteering for pro bono work or work that you care about\n\n## **CHAPTER 5\n\nPreparing for a Satisfying Career: The Law School Years**\n\nTHE DAYS WHEN SOMEONE COULD BECOME A LAWYER by \"reading the law\" and apprenticing with an experienced attorney are largely in the past. Today, for most people hoping to practice law, the only road runs through law schools. It's a three-year-long stretch that can spell the difference between a happy career and an unhappy one.\n\nOur focus in this chapter is not on surviving law school. There are numerous good books available on that subject. This chapter is addressed to law students and would-be law students, but the focus is on how to approach law school with an eye toward developing a career in law that will be satisfying to you. Implicit in this chapter is the vision of an ideal law school\u2014one that is committed to its students' future career satisfaction.\n\n### IS LAW SCHOOL FOR YOU?\n\nNot everyone is cut out to be a lawyer. Every year, thousands of students decide that law school is not for them\u2014and thousands more have that decision made for them by law schools. Between 2002 and 2008, first year law school enrollment across the country remained consistently between 48,000 and 49,000 per year.\n\nIf you're thinking of going to law school, ask yourself why. If the answer is \"I want to make a lot of money\" or \"It will make my parents happy,\" we strongly urge you to reassess your options. There are a lot of good reasons to go to law school, but those aren't two of them.\n\nThink twice if you are going to law school expecting the glamorous life of lawyers in movies or television series, such as _Law and Order_ , _The Practice_ , or _Boston Legal_. \"Law in prime time media offers some combination of wealth, power, drama or heroic opportunities. Law in real time is something else.\" Through the cinematic lens, the profession looks dramatic and exciting: compelling stories, novel legal issues, exculpatory forensic evidence, riveting courtroom scenes, and flamboyant oratory. But the daily lives of most working lawyers do not offer the courtroom adrenaline rush and only sometimes, maybe even rarely, is there the opportunity to champion a victory for an underdog. Most lawyers spend their working days researching statutes, cases, or administrative regulations; reading the fine print in contracts; writing memoranda, motions, or briefs; preparing for or conducting depositions; and meeting with clients. \"Truly realistic portrayals of lawyers' work would hardly make for entertaining or interesting movies. Few, for instance, would line up to see a film titled _Adventures in Document Production_ or _The Man Who Did Due Diligence_\".\n\nCome to law school because you think you will enjoy learning about law and legal institutions. Come because you love problemsolving, critical thinking, and helping people.\n\nYou are most likely to fit well into law school if you are open to new ideas and approaches\u2014a trait that is one of the better predictors of both academic and career success. The single _best_ predictor of both academic and career success, by the way, is conscientiousness, defined as \"the degree to which a person is organized, persistent, and goal-directed.\" If you are open to new ideas, conscientious, and you like the activities that law school demands\u2014including tons of reading\u2014you not only are on course for a satisfying law school career, but a fulfilling professional career as well. Those qualities are \"a pretty good predictor of the ability to make a satisfying career out of the degree.\"\n\nThere's nothing necessarily wrong, if you have the time and money to spare, with giving law school a shot even when you have some uncertainty about your passion for practice or doubts about your ability to succeed. Many people attend law school as a generic grad school while they figure out what they want to do with their lives. Law school is often the default graduate program for smart college students. You'll have three years to make a decision\u2014and even after that there is time for a career correction. But go in with your eyes open. And yes, there are worse things that can happen than learning a thing or three about the law while falling short of a degree.\n\nWhen deciding whether you really want to be a lawyer, you should consider that the classic model of a lawyer working for a law firm, large or small, is on the wane. Only about two-thirds of lawyers are in private practice. The remaining third may work in corporate legal departments or state or federal government positions, but many of them use their law degree in fields outside of law. This is a significant demographic shift since 1950 when there were fewer than 250,000 lawyers (a quarter as many as there are now) in this country, and 80 percent of them were in private practice. These changing demographics mean that during the span of your career, you will likely be doing something other than serving clients in a law firm setting.\n\nKeep an open mind about the possibilities of using your law degree to pursue some path other than practicing law. Law degrees offer tremendous flexibility. If you go to dental school\u2014well, plan to spend years looking at teeth. A law degree, on the other hand, can open doors in politics, business, health care, journalism, law enforcement, and other fields where clear thinking and a knowledge of our nation's laws is valued. Don't limit your career vision to traditional law jobs. You can consult in an area of your expertise (such as business valuations); be a headhunter; go into arbitration or mediation; look at human resources jobs (such as affirmative action officer); develop real estate; write thrillers (think Scott Turow or John Grisham); become counsel for a school district; use the law degree to teach at the college, junior college, or paralegal level; become an agent in the entertainment or sports industries; manage a baseball team (Tony La Russa); coach football (Vince Lombardi); write poetry (Edgar Lee Masters); create crossword puzzles (Will Shortz); become a sportscaster (Howard Cosell) or broadcast journalist (Geraldo Rivera); become an actor (John Cleese); become a Presidential speechwriter and a game show host (Ben Stein); or even become a community organizer and then President of the United States (Barack Obama). In short, don't start law school thinking that the sole career outcome is to practice law with a law firm.\n\n### CHOOSING A LAW SCHOOL\n\nChoosing a law school is a big decision. Not only will the choice influence the next three years of your life, but it may also very well determine what type of law you practice, how you practice it, and how much you enjoy being a lawyer.\n\nNearly two hundred American Bar Association (ABA) accredited law schools exist in the United States. In many ways they are remarkably similar. Because of accreditation requirements, all law schools require at least two-and-a-half years of study. All teach many of the same courses, and almost all teach many of the basic courses in similar ways\u2014in large lecture halls using a case analysis method. All offer many of the same extracurricular opportunities, from law review to student bar associations to mock trial teams.\n\nWhen most people set about choosing a law school, they start by comparing law school rankings; weigh considerations such as the credentials of the faculty or the impressiveness of the building; and factor in geography, course offerings, and perhaps whether the school has a good football team. This is the wrong way to go about picking a law school.\n\n#### CONSIDER THE IMPORTANCE OF YOUR PEERS\n\nBy far the best indicator of a good law school match for you is how well you like, respect, and trust the students who will become your peers and whether you are stimulated by them. We think, when we decide to go to law school, that we are buying a legal education. In fact, it may be more relevant to say we are buying a peer group, choosing the people who will shape our values and approach to practicing law and who, in many cases, will be the people we deal with on both a professional and social basis in the decades to come.\n\nWe've already discussed how critical relationships are to happiness and how important it is to trust those people with whom you spend your days. But it is also increasingly evident that our peers determine our values and influence our behavior to a degree most people find surprising. In _Connected: The Surprising Power of Our Social Networks and How They Shape Our Lives_ , Nicholas Christakis and James Fowler show how our peer groups influence everything from our weight to our sexual practices, not to mention our happiness. In fact, Christakis and Fowler come to the startling conclusion that not only is getting a $10,000 raise less likely to make you happy than having a happy friend\u2014it's also less likely to make you happy than having _a friend who has a friend_ who is happy! \"Network contagion,\" the phenomenon explored by Christakis and Fowler, is incredibly powerful and is rooted deeply in our evolutionary history.\n\nSo with that in mind, consider carefully the peer group you select. Do the students at a school you are considering have the ethical values you would like to have? Do they see the world as you see it, or would _like_ to see it? Are they, in general (there's a grouch or two everywhere) the type of people you would be proud to call your friends? When you go on your campus visit, remember to pay at least as much attention to the students as to the architecture. Interact as much as possible with students and ask yourself if they are the type of people you would like to be\u2014because they, in fact, will pull you in their direction for the next three years (at least). Their joys and sorrows will, to a larger extent than you ever imagine, be your joys and sorrows.\n\n#### CONSIDER VARIOUS TYPES OF RANKINGS AND SOURCES OF INFORMATION\n\nYou might be tempted, given the surface similarity of most law schools, to choose your school based on external ratings that emphasize the entering academic credentials of students, the financial resources and outside reputation of the school. You might decide to pick your law school based on the _U.S. News and World Report_ rankings of American law schools. For some of you, especially those of you interested in fast-tracking to judicial clerkships or high-salaried jobs at the nation's most prestigious law firms, that might well be a sound basis for your decision. No one can doubt that the ranking of a job applicant's school does influence hiring decisions for certain positions.\n\nYou may want to consider other factors as well in choosing your law school. It is worth noting, for example, that graduates of \"fourth-tier\" law schools (the lowest in the _U.S. News_ ranking system) actually report the highest level of job satisfaction. There are many possible reasons for this, including the satisfaction that comes from downward comparisons. Fourth-tier grads, like the bronze medalists at the Olympics, might be happy they made it through law school at all and thus appreciate their profession more than other law graduates. It might also be the case that the extremely competitive and intellectualized atmosphere of top-tier law schools, leading generally to highly paid and stressful jobs, is not conducive to a happy career path. The school that is most impressive on your resume may not be the one that will make you happiest in the long run. When you are thinking about attending law school, evaluate which law school will best launch you into a satisfying career.\n\nInstead of simply accepting admission to the highest ranked law school you can get into, consider carefully which law school seems to care about your future and can best guide you to a lifetime of happy lawyering. Contact law students and graduates and faculty at a prospective law school. What do they think about the place? Look at surveys such as the Law School Survey of Student Engagement, which evaluates law student happiness on many measures ignored in the typical national rankings of schools. Each year the _Princeton Review_ publishes its _Best Law Schools_ guide, which rates law schools based on more than 18,000 student responses in categories such as quality of classroom experiences, quality of life (including aesthetics of the law school and community ties), and professor accessibility and discusses the degree to which the school welcomes older students.\n\nTake a look at the school's catalog and see whether the school offers courses in areas of practice you especially care about. In short, kick the tires. Get a real sense of whether the school you're considering is truly a happy place likely to produce happy lawyers.\n\n#### VISIT THE SCHOOLS\n\nWhen you are comparing different law schools, visit them, ask upper-level students about their experiences, and go for a test drive\u2014sit in on several classes at each school you might want to attend. Is the law school one that makes efforts to equip its students to handle the stresses of practicing law? Is it one that encourages you to identify your own morals, beliefs, and standards? Are students encouraged to solve real-world problems? Is it a school where professors offer feedback and care about civility? Do the professors address the plights of people whose stories are the textbook cases? Do they seem to be trying to prepare students to have positive relationships with future clients? Supportive educational cultures promote student academic achievement, lead to success on the bar exam, and foster career motivation.\n\nThe best elixir is not money, but people. Search for a law school where professors understand and teach the importance of social bonds. Is your prospective law school one where students and faculty play together? Does it hold poker tournaments, faculty-student softball games, or annual skit shows? Do members of the law school community participate in Habitat for Humanity or other charitable projects? Ask current students if they have ever had a beer or a cup of coffee with a faculty member.\n\nIs the school one that prizes professional and personal mentoring? Historically, apprenticeships were the way that new lawyers were trained and socialized into the profession. Today, however, the interaction of professors and students at many schools begins and ends in the classroom. Check to see if your school offers a formal advising system by assigning each law student an individual faculty advisor. Formal advisement programs set the expectation that faculty are supposed to be more accessible to students. Several law schools have integrated members of the local bar into mentoring or inns-of-court programs to offer students both faculty advisement and attorney counseling.\n\nDoes the law school you are considering train for collaborative law practice? Does it encourage, or even permit, collaborative work among students? While students sometimes collaborate informally with peers on assignments, the \"vast majority\" of law students typically are not assigned to \"work together with other students on projects.\" Although numerous studies demonstrate the benefits of cooperative learning\u2014that it fosters engagement, depth, and critical thinking\u2014students at numerous schools still risk honor code prosecutions for cooperative behavior. Outside of some work in clinics and journals and a few team events such as moot court, most law schools \"make competition something of an art form to be practiced in relative isolation.\"\n\nA few schools are developing interdisciplinary and problem-solving courses, primarily in the clinical context, to encourage student teamwork in developing real-world solutions to problems of child and family services or healthcare. A very few schools are expanding these collaborations into the business curriculum\u2014for example, forming teams of business students and law students to teach entrepreneurial lawyering. Ask about the sorts of training your future school offers in collaborative law skills that will prepare you for the legal world you will enter. The practice of law is increasingly interdisciplinary, multidisciplinary, and collaborative. Trials are vanishing. In 2006, fewer than 1.5 percent of federal civil cases ended in a trial. The past quarter century has witnessed an exponential rise in the use of alternative dispute resolution mechanisms such as arbitration and voluntary mediation. Collaborative law practitioners report high rates of both client and lawyer satisfaction with the process and outcome. Not only is choosing a school that promotes collaboration likely to lead to a more satisfying career, it should also help prepare you for the changing nature of legal practice.\n\n#### CHOOSE A LAW SCHOOL WHERE PEOPLE MATTER\n\n_I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach 10,000 stars how not to dance._\n\n\u2014e. e. cummings\n\nLaw is a people profession. As some of the stories you will read in Chapter 7 illustrate, the vast majority of the best and worst experiences reported by lawyers we interviewed centered on the highs and lows of their interactions with other people. When you visit law schools, observe how faculty members treat their students. Try to find a school where professors respect students, their time, and their needs. An obvious form of respect, for example, is the learning and using of students' names. Students prefer to be called by their names rather than be identified as \"You in Back with the Green Shirt\" or have a professor's finger pointed in their direction. Other forms of demonstrating respect for students may be equally simple. See, for example, if classes start and end on time. Ask current students what's best and what's worst about their law school experiences.\n\nMore broadly, determine whether professors are adept at giving the subtle cues that people matter. It is easy to ask a student to give the opposing view to arguments made by another student; it is more difficult for a professor to communicate that she expects that student to look for and acknowledge the best in the argument made by the first student and then develop the other side. Were different points of view valued? Was explicit praise given when the students helped each other in class? Try to find out if the professors care about the students. As a student once told us, \"Good teachers care how students are doing in the classroom; great teachers care how students are doing in life.\"\n\nTeachers that care about people help counter declining civility in the legal profession and convey the idea that people and their feelings matter. They understand that in using the case method to push students to separate the \"relevant\" from the \"irrelevant\" this idea can be lost. Typically, if a fact or feature of a case is one that might affect the outcome of the case, it is \"relevant.\" If a fact or feature of the case, however much it might matter to the parties or even society as a whole, is unlikely to determine a legal outcome, the fact or feature is deemed \"irrelevant.\" Intense personal suffering, gross indignities, and abstract notions of justice all get thrown under the irrelevancy bus as the class discussion moves to its oh-so-logical conclusion. While this analysis might sharpen students' minds, professors risk signaling to students that all matters deemed legally irrelevant are, in the larger world of human experience, also irrelevant there\u2014when, in fact, they are anything but. There should come a time, in a discussion of a case, when we pause to measure the situation without our lawyer lenses. The practice of law is about more than winning or losing cases: it is about doing right for our clients while, consistent with that goal, doing as little damage as possible to everyone else.\n\nIn a school where people matter, professors will not overemphasize the combative or adversarial nature of the profession. Too often, the lesson drawn from professors' war stories is not the concept of intellectual engagement with ideas\u2014students begin to see a world filled with enemies:\n\nLaw students quickly learn to see other people as adversaries. Success means finding fault with the other side's, or the lower court's, position. If we focus on the positive, our words are deemed vacuous. This facet of our professional lives exacts a heavy toll on our ability to connect with other people in our lives, whether in professional or personal relationships.\n\nThe practice of dispassionately flipping legal arguments can cause lawyers-to-be to become insensitive to the people involved and their suffering. People behind the cases in textbooks can become dehumanized \"plaintiffs\" and \"defendants.\" Each case you will read was a series of real events\u2014perhaps life-altering\u2014for the people involved. The people in those cases lived with various social, economic, job, and familial pressures. None of them had, as we do now, the luxury of distance from the events in their lives. Christine Hurt, a torts professor at Marquette University Law School, reminds her students \"that every person in our textbook's cases, whether plaintiff or defendant, was a real person who had either been injured, or caused injury to others, and would therefore never be the same.\" How you think about the people behind the sterile appellate cases in the casebook lays a foundation for the ways you will think about clients in the future\u2014as demanding interlopers in an otherwise great relationship between the exchange of money and ideas or as complex people with frailties, needs, and hopes. If you learn to care about the people you represent, you will become a better professional and a more satisfied practicing lawyer.\n\n#### CHOOSE A SCHOOL THAT CARES IF YOU BECOME A HAPPY LAWYER\n\nThe traditional law school curriculum too often ignores career satisfaction. While more than one hundred colleges and universities offer classes in happiness research, we reviewed the available curriculum and course descriptions posted on the websites of almost two hundred ABA-approved law schools and found only six schools that offer specific classes in happy lawyering. Nine other schools address issues of career satisfaction as a small portion of much broader courses on law practice management, trial advocacy, or professional responsibility. Harvard Law School boasts more than four hundred seminars and courses but no courses on happiness or career satisfaction, although its undergraduate college offers one of the best-attended happiness courses in the country. The University of Michigan Law School lists the intriguingly named course \"Bloodfeuds,\" but again, no course on happiness. Perhaps law schools consider the topic the exclusive province of the career services office or one not worth academic inquiry\u2014or maybe the topic has simply not been considered at all.\n\nIdeas about job happiness, of course, may surface from time to time in other classes, such as legal ethics or professional responsibility. Discussion of these issues may help set expectations for careers and thus reduce dissonance between students' ideals and the later realities of legal practice. But the fact remains that more than 90 percent of all law schools in the country do not offer a single course that explicitly proclaims it will address issues of career satisfaction or lawyer happiness. How can law schools help students make good career choices if they offer no courses on career satisfaction?\n\n#### WHAT IF YOUR LAW SCHOOL DOESN'T?\n\nMaybe you are already in law school and as you read the above wish list, you realized that your law school was missing a few key features. Being the optimist that you are\u2014surely, there's a pony in here somewhere\u2014you might be wondering what you can do to make your law school more successful at promoting happy careers. You can always push for changes at your current school. Many, if not most, law schools make students participants in the schools' decision-making processes by giving them positions on law school committees affecting student life, including curriculum and appointment committees. Find the student organizations that host forums and invite speakers to your law school. Voice your desire to bring to your school speakers who can address lawyer happiness issues. You can request specific panels or presenters from your career services offices as well.\n\nWhy not approach a professor or a curriculum committee with the idea of creating a new course on satisfying legal careers? The course could introduce students to the general literature about the science of happiness and the different definitions of happiness. It could also provide comparative data on the satisfaction levels in various professions, identify characteristics of jobs with high and low levels of satisfaction, and consider dimensions of career satisfaction among lawyers in different types of practice. The class could include information from decision theory about how people respond to an overabundance of choices and what types of heuristic errors people make when predicting their reactions to events and situations. Course exercises could include projects that help students identify their own values or could require students to interview practicing lawyers. Finally, the course could weave in stories of lawyer heroes and heroines to remind students that they are embarking on a noble journey and to teach them, as philosopher Sidney Hook said in his 1943 book, the _Hero in History_ , the importance of not only doing their job well, but also of \"mak[ing] a unique contribution to the public good.\"\n\n### DEFINING SUCCESS IN LAW SCHOOL\n\nAll students applying to law schools write a personal statement telling why they want to be lawyers and what distinguishes them from the other 80,000 plus applicants. In encouraging students to present a sense of themselves, law schools echo Cyrano de Bergerac's Roxanne: \"Speak to me... be eloquent, be brilliant for me. Improvise, Rhapsodize... Please gather your dreams together into words.\" You probably wrote that you approached law school with the desire to make a difference. Perhaps you described your aspiration to fight for justice and make the world a better place. (We're generously assuming here, in these cynical times, you didn't just say whatever you thought would get you admitted.)\n\nSo what happens to your dreams?\n\nWhen you enter law school, it is easy to get on \"the institutional glide path.\" Law schools often define success for their students in terms of grades, class standing, and journal participation that lead to well-paying jobs at prestigious law firms. Law students report hearing about these prizes during law school orientation even before their first day of class. Consequently, students tend to internalize these prescribed measures of success and feel pressure to perform. As Harry Lewis, former dean of Harvard College, wrote in _Excellence Without a Soul_ , students try to obtain high grades as a form of credentialing rather than seeking understanding or mastery of the material. You can easily get sucked into believing that success and meaning can only be found in attaining a top ten percent grade point average, making Law Review, and having a full dance card for on-campus interviews. If you let these extrinsic markers of achievement define you, you are setting yourself up for unhappiness.\n\nOne of the first questions to ask yourself is whether other people are setting school and career expectations for you? Many students aspire to work in large law firms: some because of the exciting big impact cases those firms take, others in part because of the money or the prestige. Still others think they _should_ aim for big firm practice because law schools send the message that this is the pinnacle of success; at some law schools it is simply easier to find one of these jobs. Working at a big law firm and earning a high salary are not bad things. But three-fourths of law students in any given geographic area will not practice law with a large law firm. Ninety percent of law students will not graduate in the top ten percent of their class. (Go ahead, do the math.) And virtually all law students who embrace these traditional markers of success will be afflicted with the problem that these numeric measures are not good predictors for future career happiness. Buying into these metrics of success also has the unpleasant side effect of feeding a competitive law school culture and aggravating individual vulnerability, self-doubt, and isolation\u2014in other words, making your law school experience pressure-cooker miserable.\n\nTwo of the most important things the happiness literature reveals are that people who have a passion or purpose in their careers are happier and that those who define the meaning of their work for themselves will be happier doing it. Law schools tend to define success for people in narrow terms that begin and end with big numbers, judicial clerkships, and jobs at elite firms. That is a very limited vision of what is possible\u2014and it may have little or no relevance to what will make you happy.\n\nRemember your dreams. If you don't have dreams going in or just don't know what you want to do yet, explore widely, consider the kind of law _you_ want to practice, pay attention to the common errors you might stumble on as you try to make your future self happy, and consider whether you even want to practice law at all.\n\n### THE LAW SCHOOL EXPERIENCE\n\n_The Universal Fallacy: that the road to happiness runs through the top of the class._\n\nThe first year of law school is transformative. It is a time when you recognize that most legal problems do not have single, correct solutions\u2014that law is indeterminate. Recognizing that incoherence is embedded in law is unsettling, particularly for those of you who were drawn to law because you like rules. The reading assignments consist of a voluminous number of pages per night, much of it in what seems at first like a foreign language. Terms like _res ipsa loquitur_ and _mens rea_ may stump you even after you translate them from the Latin. In Contracts, \"consideration\" is not kindness. And \"horizontal privity\" in Property? Well, it doesn't mean what you think it means.\n\nYou must be prepared each day, if called on, to demonstrate your understanding of the material and perform in front of your classmates. The Socratic method, which is intended to probe students' understanding of the law and to show that factual differences can lead to different outcomes, can be wielded (highly improperly, we think) in ways that intimidate students and undermine self-esteem:\n\nMr. Jones, can you please tell us the facts in the case of...? Mr. Jones, what was the issue confronting the court in the case of...? Now, Mr. Jones, do you think the court was correct in finding that...? I see. Well, Mr. Jones, what would you have the court do instead? But Mr. Jones, now I am confused. You are telling us that.... Whereas, a few moments ago, you told us that.... Which is it, Mr. Jones...? What do you mean you're not sure, Mr. Jones? Not sure about what? Well then, let me change the facts a bit for you, Mr. Jones....\n\nSometimes the Socratic method seems like a cruel game of \"hide the ball.\" This can lead to a loss of trust. And, as we've seen, research in disciplines from social psychology to neuroeconomics shows that trust in relationships is crucial to happiness.\n\nCompetition and alienation from fellow classmates surface outside the classroom as well. Embedded in law school culture are other very public contests\u2014for positions as research or teaching assistants or on the moot court team or for clerkships, internships, and jobs. The architecture of law school is reminiscent of high school, with assigned classes, lockers, and relentless gossip. At some law schools, but certainly not all, students engage in more aggressive forms of bullying or hazing. They instant message each other during class to ridicule other students or play \"Gunner Bingo.\" Acts of aggression among law students may be the training ground for later incivilities among lawyers. This emphasizes the importance of selecting a school where you will like your peers.\n\nMost of you enter law school with high expectations. You were an academically successful undergrad or you wouldn't be here. Maybe you are also the sort of type-A personality that makes other type As look like B minuses. Grading systems are competitive; law school curves pit students against each other in class ranking battles. The nature of the rankings is that they create a small number of winners and a large number of losers. You may feel like a failure if your law school grades don't resemble your undergraduate grades, even though the curve is different, and your self-esteem may take a hit if you don't perform as well as your peers. First-year grades often determine who joins the law review and who wins prized summer clerkships, both of which pave the way for later jobs. What's worse, and makes you all the more anxious, is that all of those grades still typically ride on a single comprehensive test at the end of the semester. You will usually receive minimal individualized performance feedback before that single exam.\n\nIn response to these cumulative pressures, you may be seduced into changing both your life style and your attitudes: you will probably worry much more than you have before, give up regular exercise, and socialize much less with your family and friends. \"You'll have some significant changes in your personal habits: you'll lose your appetite or you'll want to pig out all the time; you'll want to sleep all the time or you won't be able to sleep; you'll want sex all the time or you'll never want sex again.\" You may suffer some manifestations of stress-induced illness: depression, headaches, viruses, allergies, or a host of other ailments\u2014and you may experience despair, difficulties concentrating, and anger at friends, family members and professors. You may try to anesthetize yourself with alcohol and drugs.\n\nYou might wonder whether law schools are admitting people destined to be unhappy. Law schools don't use a GPA-LSATMMPI admissions index, but studies show that law students start out with psychological profiles that are normal. Law students look very much like other students except for a couple of personality variables. They may be more competitive than the general undergraduate population, have a higher need for dominance or leadership, and have a tendency to be oriented to external measures of validation; but pre-law students have \"no greater incidence of psychological distress than the general population.\" Psychologist Kennon Sheldon and law professor Larry Krieger evaluated law students at two different schools during the course of their three years of legal education. They found that students entering law school were equally well- or better-adjusted than a comparable population of undergraduates. Then the students became increasingly unhappy in law school.\n\nAccompanying the intense competitive pressures to succeed is an insidious attitude transformation. Students are drawn away from intrinsic (inherently enjoyable) and idealistic motives such as helping others or curiosity and toward extrinsic motivations (activities that are \"a means to an end\"), such as \"impressing others, or gaining status and affluence.\" Success in law school is defined by these external measures and law students\u2014smart creatures\u2014internalize the goals of grades, law journal positions, clerkships, and high starting salaries.\n\nIn short, students buy into a system of superficial goals over which they may have little control, and they then suffer a loss of self-esteem from the competition. Krieger says simply that it is \"likely that your _attitudes_ (and anxieties) about the possible results, coupled with life style distortions, are wearing you out physically and emotionally.\" Even worse, many of these dysfunctional patterns established during law school\u2014the anxiety, depression, and drug and alcohol dependence\u2014carry over into practice. The competitive atmosphere of law school and the transition to practice can cement good or bad habits, especially for those for whom law school represents their first real experience with the full-time work world. Changing bad stress management habits once you have begun working is neither easy nor likely.\n\nIn the sections that follow, we consider the things you can do to avoid laying a poor foundation for career happiness. Before we do, though, let's examine an alternative outlook on law school. You often hear about the dark sides of the law school experience. What about the upsides?\n\n### A DIFFERENT VIEW OF THE LAW SCHOOL EXPERIENCE\n\nIs law school really _that_ bad? Does it inevitably set most law students up for disappointing careers? Just as many lawyers find the profession satisfying, many law students enjoy the ride. There is no one generic law school experience. Law schools are different. Law professors are different. Students will find professors at each end of the continuum measuring their concern for the well-being of their students.\n\nLaw schools across the country boast numerous graduates who have had a very different sort of experience than the stress laden competitive expedition described above. A 2007 survey of more than 27,000 law students showed that the vast majority of students were \"satisfied with their law school experience. Eighty-two percent of all students rated their law school experience 'good' or 'excellent.' Only 3% said their experience was 'poor.'\" Some students thrive in law school and emerge feeling excited about their upcoming careers. Some talk enthusiastically about the atmosphere of mutual support and sense of tight-knit esprit de corps they found in law school. An extension of that camaraderie is the network of fellow former students who will become your professional colleagues: \"Many of us look back to our law school days and see that as the time when we made some of the most enduring friendships of our entire life.\"\n\nThe wide array of clinics and externships offered at law schools gives students a window on career options that may be personally satisfying. Contrary to the bleak view of some commentators\u2014that law schools are creating disillusioned students who anticipate \"brutal hours, inadequate training and unfulfilling work\" at a large firm so \"they can hope to pay back their enormous debts\"\u2014a survey of third year students showed that 79 percent were either somewhat or very optimistic that they \"will have a satisfying career after law school.\"\n\nPerhaps one of the greatest services law schools can offer students in preparation for a satisfying career is to enable students' expectations to match the realities of practice. Law schools outfit students for fulfilling careers by preparing them for what is to come. The hard work that law school demands is appropriate training for a profession that has fairly grueling hours.\n\nYou may look back and realize that law school did equip you to handle many of the slings and arrows of practice: that you learned teamwork in sharing notes, that the Socratic dialogue prepared you to sharpen your thinking and articulate positions for your clients and to understand that there is no single right answer to \"most of the hard questions that real world practice poses,\" and that as a litigator\u2014and unlike Yogi Berra\u2014you need to be ready to \"tak[e] both forks in the road.\"\n\nStudents may have better or worse experiences in law school because of their own personality characteristics or the schools they choose to attend. The next section explores the types of attitudes that are associated with greater measures of satisfaction in law school and suggests some approaches you can take during law school to build a sound base for later satisfaction in practice.\n\n### DEFINING SUCCESS FOR YOURSELF IN LAW SCHOOL\n\n#### KEEPING YOUR OWN COMPASS\n\n_It is practically a \"given\" that great success\u2014top grades, high salary, or a prestigious job represent the fast track to happiness. This pervasive belief is false._\n\nSo much of learning how to actually practice law is on-the-job training. Yet there are a few keys to future career happiness that you can learn in law school. Surprisingly, they have little to do with pure academic successes. A recent study of more than 6,000 law students at fifty law schools showed that high LSAT scores are \"slightly negatively related to life satisfaction.\" The researchers concluded that \"one's ability level, as assessed by standardized admissions tests, does not predict life satisfaction; rather, rewards gained through hard work and engagement with the material predicts life satisfaction.\" In short, highly engaged law students are more likely to become happier lawyers.\n\nThose keys to life satisfaction have everything to do with learning to let internal motivations guide you. Students who define success in terms of their own values are better at avoiding the distress-depression-substance abuse triad. The individual values can include personal qualities that are important to you, such as integrity, responsibility, or openness to collaboration. Or they can shape intrinsically satisfying goals, such as representing clients effectively, telling a client's story, championing civil rights, or serving the public.\n\nHaving intrinsic focus does more than enhance self-esteem, build competence, and help avoid the competitive nature of a law school's system of extrinsic rewards. Research in learning theory shows that when students study toward the goal of mastering a topic and concentrate \"on acquiring the skills or knowledge that are the subject of study,\" they actually perform better academically than those students who set performance goals that focus \"on grades or other performances relative to... fellow students.\" In other words, if you are studying Property \"hard\" and agonizing over whether you are studying \"hard enough to get a B,\" you are likely to perform less well than if you study with the goal of being able to explain various rules about covenants that run with the land to a future client. If you learn to focus on your own objectives and consider what fulfills you personally, you will be more likely to pursue individually satisfying\u2014rather than socially-prescribed\u2014career directions.\n\nAnother key to success in law school that lays the foundation for future career satisfaction is to make friends. Your fellow students will be your professional peers for the rest of your career. Reach out, even if it makes you uncomfortable at first. Remoteness and a lack of sociability are not characteristics of either happy law students or happy lawyers. Studies show that those lawyers who have more close friends and a greater amount of social interaction are more likely to be successful (according to ratings of external evaluators) than lawyers who report they are isolated. Building connections to other people, and remaining close to your support network, takes work; but you will happily discover that much of what you will learn during law school and the best part of the overall experience takes place outside the classroom.\n\nDeveloping positive relationships with your professors is also important. Law students may perceive faculty as distant, particularly in first-year, large-section classes. Females and racial minorities in particular may be less comfortable than males and whites in seeking out professors for conversations about the course material or career advice. Developing social connections with faculty outside the classroom not only enhances learning, it \"makes the educational process more meaningful\" because professors can often help students reflect on their own values better in one-on-one meetings. To boot, professors may also have early notice of career opportunities.\n\nJust as you will ultimately want advisors outside of your own firm as well as inside once you start practicing, you should search for mentors outside the walls of the law school. Seek out mentoring. Learning to find mentors is part of your professional training. Networking and mentoring will be crucial to your career. Fortunately, you will probably discover that lawyers in the community are more than willing to be mentors. When asked to describe a peak experience he has had in the practice of law, Greg Castanias, a partner in the Washington, D.C., office of Jones Day, said that it was not any one event, \"Ultimately, it seems to come down to the mentoring I have received, and the mentoring I have been able to provide to others.\"\n\n#### AVOIDING DEBT-DRIVEN CAREER CHOICES AND SUBTLE STEERAGE\n\nThe literature on job satisfaction in particular law careers shows that on average those in government and public interest work are more satisfied with their work than those in private practice. However, many law students wonder whether they can afford to pursue their public interest passion and still repay their school loans. Studies show that when students enter law school, between 40 and 70 percent of them say they want to work in the public interest area. Yet, when exiting law school, only a fraction of those who expressed such a preference actually start work in public interest law. Looming law school debt provides an incomplete and perhaps partly misleading explanation for the crowds detouring away from public interest work. The other explanation is that the curriculum of most law schools is not geared toward training students in the administrative, practical, and human skills they will need to enter public interest work.\n\nMedian tuition at public law schools for in-state students was approximately $15,600 in 2008, $26,400 for out-of-state students at public schools, and $34,000 at private law schools. In 2009, the typical law school graduate entered practice with debts of approximately $100,000. Let's look at what that debt load means in relation to starting salaries.\n\nFor the class of 2008, the National Association for Law Placement (NALP) reports that the median starting salary among all law firms was $72,000, with a mean of $92,000. These figures can be misleading. Salaries are significantly stratified into a bimodal distribution: the mapping of them looks like a double-humped camel, with clumps of salaries at both the high and low ends. New lawyers are, upon graduation, salary-sorted into the \"haves\" and the \"have nots.\" Many law graduates received low starting salaries, a smaller number obtained large starting salaries, and there was not much middle ground. See figure 1.\n\nThe far right hump (really, more of a spike) of the camel shows that larger firms enter this salary competition believing their reputations are tied to their ability to compete with other big firms in terms of starting salaries. The other hump reveals that most other firms don't feel compelled to, or can't, enter the salary race\u2014and instead offer salaries that match their own markets.\n\nThe actual starting salaries vary significantly with the size and type of firm and the geographic area of the country. For instance, the national median starting salary in 2007 for firms with 2\u201325 lawyers was $68,000, for firms with 26\u201350 lawyers, it was $81,000, and for firms of 101\u2013250 lawyers, it was $105,000, with salaries starting at $130,000 for firms of more than 250 lawyers. First year prosecutors and judicial law clerks earned about two-thirds of the median salaries at the smallest firms ($46,000), while first year legal services lawyers earned only $38,000.\n\nFIGURE 1: Class of 2008\n\n_Source_ : NALP\n\nConsider how many of your current decisions are motivated by economics\u2014what you can afford to do, and whether you can repay your student loans. Fortunately, this debt may be more manageable than the looming large numbers first make it seem. Lawyers are not minimum wage earners and make a good salary over time. Tapping into recently enacted federal loan forgiveness programs\u2014programs that completely or partially relieve debt for lawyers working a certain number of years in particular legal services jobs\u2014is an option for some.\n\n##### _Loan Repayment Assistance Programs_\n\nSixteen states and the District of Columbia offer loan repayment assistance programs for lawyers entering public service jobs. These typically provide a yearly amount of from $2,500 to $12,000 of assistance to lawyers in specified public interest jobs whose annual income does not exceed $40,000-$65,000, depending on the state. Equal Justice Works lists 109 law schools that either have their own loan assistance repayment program or participate in one in their state or both.\n\nIn 2008, Congress passed the Higher Education Reauthorization and College Opportunity Act, which created four new loan forgiveness programs for public interest lawyers. Finally, the Department of Education has created a plan for Income Based Repayment (IBR) of federal student loans. Starting in July 2009, IBR creates a sliding scale based on income and family size for federal loans made to students (not parents), allowing them to qualify for reduced payment options. If you are interested in public interest work, examine these sources of assistance in debt repayment.\n\n##### _Income and Subjective Well-Being_\n\nAs you explore various career options, keep in mind the literature on the limited ability of money to make and keep you happy. Maybe money is the one thing you think will make you happy, but people overestimate the effect that money will have on their levels of happiness. Remarkably, even having higher income aspirations leads to reduced life satisfaction. People who look upward when they make comparisons and then evaluate their own situation in relation to their financial ambitions pay a price. Also, as our discussions of the \"hedonic treadmill\" revealed, the pleasure boost from a raise in income is transitory; then consumption levels increase, and you find yourself again in the position of wanting to have more than you do. What's more, particularly in certain types of law practice that emphasize billable hours, you will likely find that you do not have the time to enjoy the new toys your money provides.\n\n### IDENTIFYING A SATISFYING CAREER\n\n[F]or over twenty-five years, the National Association for Law Placement (NALP) has surveyed the nation's law schools and reported that over 90 percent of those seeking employment find it within approximately six months of graduation... . The fact that you will ultimately find a job does little to assuage the nagging fear in the minds of many law students that _they_ will be the ones left out in the cold, $100,000 in debt and panhandling outside the Grand Central Terminal just to stay alive... . Actually, the real danger is not that you will fail to find a job, but that you will find the wrong one.\n\nStudents attend law school for many different reasons and, thus, contemplate myriad career paths after graduation. When you start thinking about what job you want after law school, it's good to keep in mind that old law adage that there is no one right answer. Eduardo Punset cautions that because reality is too complex, we create ideals\u2014imaginary perfect models\u2014of lovers, of careers, and so on. There is no ideal job, but lots of jobs could be satisfying. There can also be jobs that are wrong for you.\n\n#### AVOIDING THE INSTITUTIONAL GLIDE PATH\n\nWhen you consider possible jobs, evaluate the sources of information and institutional pressures toward certain types of jobs. Law schools face a number of tensions that may undermine their steering students toward individually satisfying careers. Many of the subtle messages students receive about worthwhile occupations come from faculty members who, for the most part, worked for large law firms and did not have a large amount or a wide range of practice experiences. For law professors across the country the average time in practice prior to teaching is only 3.7 years. This is part of the glide path problem: professors may have a tendency to steer students toward the model with which they are most familiar\u2014a federal clerkship that rolls into a stint at a big firm.\n\nSchools also have a reputational interest in placing students in the biggest, best-paying jobs possible. This creates a prestige boost and produces more lucrative donors down the road.\n\nCareer services offices in a variety of ways cater to larger firms, which are their recurrent visitors during on-campus interviews (OCI) seasons and typically are the most frequent employers of graduates. The exposure of students \"to a significant level to a large firm presence... often leads to a perceived hierarchy of post-law school jobs, with employment at big firms being seen to be more prestigious than other non-large firm jobs.\" Another factor plays into the tilt toward \"Big Law.\" Career offices are judged in large part by their placement statistics. This may leave directors of career development in the position of spending buckets of time tracking students down for employment reporting purposes, a task low on anyone's list of favorite pastimes, and with much less time to do individual advising to assess career options that match interests and skills. Although law school personnel know that a mismatch between a given job and a student's interests and skill set will not result in a happy outcome, the traditional steerage toward the most prestigious job offered remains a well-embedded default position at most schools. Keep in mind that the conventional path may not be the one that will bring you the most long-term satisfaction. Although high status jobs and high salaries are \"seductive\u2014they create a nice picture of life... they are actually correlated with relative unhappiness.\"\n\nCareer service offices receive little encouragement to widely disseminate information that might put law schools into conflict positions with large firms in their areas, many of which are probably the law schools' principal supporters: the lavish donor firm that put the Jackson Pollock in the faculty lounge and the fountain in the student center. Although this may not be a conscious sentiment of those people giving career advice to students, there may be the vague concern that if law schools focus more on finding happiness-producing jobs for their graduates than high income-producing jobs, there may be an impact on law school finances over the long term.\n\nThe absence of information about which law jobs are more satisfying or firm-specific information about billable hours and work-life balance policies is compounded by firms having a marketing interest in the disclosure of less information rather than more. Remember that the lawyers who come to law schools for on-campus interviews are there, at least in part, to sell their individual firms.\n\nWhat all of these ingrained interests, default positions, veiled facts, and traditional ways of doing things imply is that you will need to be proactive in seeking out unfiltered information about measures of career satisfaction in various types of jobs. The Internet makes information about law firms (e.g., size, salaries, practice groups, services, and clients) instantly available. Rankings from various groups are splashed across its pages. Law Students Building a Better Legal Profession provides a website that provides an interactive \"report card\" on almost 350 firms in major markets across the country, based on factors such as the number of billable hours required. In 2008, _Working Mother_ magazine and the national consulting group Flex-Time Lawyers compiled its second annual list of the fifty best law firms for women. More information is available than ever before. Just as law professors have had to face the verdicts of their student reviewers on websites such as www.RateMyProfessors.com, law firms now are being reviewed on the Web by their associates and clients alike.\n\nMaybe your career services office is one that tries to ensure that the expectations of students match the realities of the firms or organizations they are joining. Perhaps it offers a chart of area firms' billable hour requirements, parenting leave policies, and approaches to work-life balance. Your career office might even keep data on alumni who go to different firms and whether they are happy there or whether they leave those firms to get a sense of personality matches between individuals and firms. If your career services office is one that doesn't do these things, consider asking why not?\n\n#### EXPLORING WIDELY VERSUS THE PARADOX OF CHOICE\u2014WHY THINKING LIKE A LAWYER MAY NOT HELP\n\nWhen you begin your search for jobs in law, the sheer number of possible paths can be daunting. You can have too many choices and be unhappy. You can also have too few choices and be unhappy. It's the law careers version of the Three Bears' dilemma.\n\nIf you take the path of least resistance, you wind up with only a narrow slice of possibilities. You participate in the on campus interviews, while moaning a little that the OCI favor the top 10 or 20 percent of students, and then pretty much limit your searches to the online lists of job postings on the career services website. This is a mistake.\n\nThere is often much more than OCI going on at a given school. Attend various career forums and panel discussions about career possibilities, meet-the-firms, and bar association networking events. Explore public interest job search guides, participate in mock interview programs, review binders with students' evaluations about their summer experiences, and attend educational programs about topics such as how to make yourself profitable to a firm or how to assess your values, personality, and career choices. Peruse the bar directory and write letters to firms in your interest areas. Seek out government internship or fellowship opportunities and inquire whether your career services office has a reciprocity arrangement with that of law schools in other cities where you might like to work. If you have a specific idea about your career path, pursue it by taking relevant courses, attending seminars or continuing legal education programs, and finding out how attorneys in the area landed their jobs. Explore widely, at least initially. But you can have too much of a good thing.\n\nRemember _The Paradox of Choice_? An overabundance of choices produces anxiety, undermines happiness, and leads to disappointment. Being able to select from among ninety different types of mutual funds and seventeen brands of toothpaste makes people feel overwhelmed. That same sprawling array of options\u2014coupled with the search for the perfect fit\u2014awaits you in the legal field. Too many options can paralyze you with indecision: \"Perhaps there comes a point at which opportunities become so numerous that we feel overwhelmed. Instead of feeling in control, we feel unable to cope.\" Even the possibility of too many choices can create inertia\u2014which is why most people stay with their telephone providers rather than shop calling plans.\n\nPeople feel most in control of their lives when they have choices\u2014but not too many choices. One way to deal with hyper-choice is to whittle down the multiplicity of options into a smaller number of clearly differentiated paths, a distinct variety of possibilities. The first step is distinguishing between \"choices that matter\" while \"unburdening yourself from the choices that don't.\" Don't spend all of your decisional time pondering the relative advantages of living in Pittsburgh versus Philadelphia\u2014and which city has the better baseball team. Think instead about the type of practice that interests you and best aligns with your values.\n\nChoosing an alternative that is good enough\u2014\"satisficing\"\u2014often leads to greater happiness than holding out for the perfect choice: \"With 'good enough' rather than 'best' as a criterion, the satisficer will be less inclined to experience regret if it turns out that an option better than the one chosen was available.\" Too often, we imagine that there is a perfect job and hold out for it. There are bad jobs and good jobs\u2014even some great jobs\u2014but there are no perfect jobs.\n\nMichael Melcher, a career coach and author of _The Creative Lawyer_ , says that many of the analytical strategies of \"thinking like a lawyer\" you learn in law school won't serve you well in thinking about your career path. Lawyers, he says, \"analyze rather than explore, focus on flaws and potential problems, look for clear precedent, require solutions of general applicability ('what would work for lawyers') rather than specific applicability ('what would work for me'), defer action in situations of uncertainty, [are] skeptical about possibilities, [and] avoid taking risks.\" It is not possible to imagine your whole career, see how it is going to play out, and know where you will be happiest. As Melcher concludes, \"the path from here to there is a zigzag, not a straight line, and... you are better off exploring and experiencing than assessing things through detailed analysis.\"\n\nSo, bearing in mind the paralysis that too many choices can cause, the worry that comes from too few choices, and your inability to reason your way out of this mess in a lawyerly fashion, what should you _do_? Is taking a job that passes the threshold of acceptability a good start, particularly given that your first job in law is highly unlikely to be your last? Or might that approach lead you down a path that locks you in to a particular type of work? We're going to give the typical law school answer: That depends. It depends on what your emotional and financial needs are, what jobs are available, and what ability you have to tolerate uncertainty. Too often, students seem desperate to Get A Job. Anxiety and fear tend to drive the job search. The best approach is to consider very specifically what would make you happy and what values, skills, and interests you have.\n\n#### REMEMBER YOUR PASSIONS\n\nThere are ways to both pursue your passion and distinguish yourself from the other 43,500 new law graduates who will flood the market each year. There may not be \"clear precedent\" for the type of law you think you might like to practice. If you have a combination of skills that permits you to offer a distinctive set of services to clients, you may be highly marketable and also very content. Consider the experiences of Kevin Travis, a lawyer who lives in the Midwest, but whose primary client is several states away in the South.\n\nI worked my way through both college and law school as a mechanic, and once I got my law license, I thought I'd never use my mechanical knowledge again. But that one client for whom I ended up spending all my time as a litigation associate at my first firm was a vehicle service contract administrator, and when they got sued over claims they had denied, they not only needed someone who knew how to defend a lawsuit, but also someone who could understand what had gone wrong with the car, and why, and could explain the mechanical aspects of the claim to the finder of the facts. Because I had the combination of legal and mechanical skills, I could do both, and suddenly, I'd found a specialty where I could stand out... not only in my town or my state, but in the whole country. I'm now doing the same type of work for a different client, but in the same industry, that is a thousand miles away. I get that work, rather than one of the many hungry local lawyers in the large town where my client is located, because of the unique combination of skills I can offer.\n\nOr take Julia Belian, now teaching in Michigan, who earned a master of divinity degree and then a law degree. With this set of degrees, she entered estate planning. She says she found a \"special joy\" in probate work because \"it really _matters_ , whether it is rich clients or not, because we're all mortal, and we all want to take care of our loved ones.... This isn't just _law_ we're discussing, it's life and death, quite literally.\" She is also particularly trained to help clients discuss their fears and make estate plans\u2014\"because to plan, you must first accept that you will die.\" Having these discussions with client, she says, is \"a ministry of the highest order.\"\n\nOr perhaps you liked horses when you were growing up. When Denise Farris was little, her family \"always had a horse in the back yard.\" Her \"horse hobby\" continued after law school. When she noticed the enactment of statutes creating liability shelters for equine professionals, she created a newsletter addressing those statutes and mailed the newsletter to stables in a tristate area as a public service. She was invited to speak on the topic by the Missouri and Kansas Horse Councils as well as the University of Kentucky Law School, and quickly became one of the nation's experts on equine law, which is now a substantial portion of her practice. She addresses numerous intriguing facets of equine law for clients: risk management contracts, stallion syndication agreements, \"who's your daddy\" testing following artificial insemination, zoning and environmental issues regarding manure and carcass disposal, and estate planning for owners wanting to ensure ongoing care for that special horse. Farris says it is richly rewarding to discover new practice areas can be created around life-long passions.\n\nBased on your interests, hobbies outside law, and special expertise, you may be able to create your own niche practice. But, if you don't have a pre-existing specialty area, then what?\n\n#### YOUR STRENGTHS, INTERESTS, AND VALUES\n\nEver since 1880, when John Venn introduced his famous diagrams, students have been taught to use overlapping circles to depict the intersection of information sets. Harvard University psychologist Tal Ben-Shahar proposes using Venn diagrams as a job finding tool. We believe this approach could benefit law students searching for that satisfying job.\n\nBen-Shahar urges job-seekers to use what he calls \"the Three Question Process.\" He identifies three inward-looking questions most helpful to the search: (1) What gives me meaning? (2) What gives me pleasure? (3) What are my strengths? Sources of meaning might include, for example, working with the elderly, solving problems, promoting religious values, or protecting nature. Sources of pleasure could include, for example, hiking, singing, solving crossword-puzzles, or reading books about history. Strengths might include problem solving, meticulousness, knowledge of history, and an ability to relate to a wide variety of people. Preparing lists of your own sources of meaning and pleasure and your strengths is an exercise that requires considerable reflection and time on your part. You might aim to identify, say, ten entries in each of the three categories. In identifying strengths, consider subject areas of expertise (for example, environmental law, intellectual property), your skill sets (for instance, writing, oral communication, analytical skills, organizational ability, ability to relate well to others), and your personality (are you compassionate, risk-tolerant, extroverted, patient?).\n\nTo complete the exercise, put your entries in circles and then, in Venn diagram fashion, examine the overlap between your circles to sharpen your thinking about what jobs might be the most satisfying. If you find meaning in working with the elderly (source of meaning), enjoy spending time with others or like discussing history (sources of pleasure), have expertise in the area of elder law or estate planning, and are patient and compassionate (strengths), then you might do well to consider positions with the Social Security Administration or an estate planning firm, to name a couple of obvious job possibilities. If you like helping underdogs, enjoy performing and strategizing, and relate well to people of all types\u2014well, we suppose you have already thought about becoming a plaintiff's personal injury lawyer.\n\nBen-Shahar warns that your own list is likely to be messy. Jobs might not come jumping off of your page of Venn diagrams. The real benefit of the Three Question Process for most of you is likely to be to sharpen your thinking about meaning, pleasure, and strengths and to gain an appreciation for how those concerns are central to your job satisfaction.\n\nAnother way of viewing your strengths comes from noted University of Michigan psychologist, Christopher Peterson, and Martin Seligman, former President of the American Psychological Association, as well as fifty-five other social scientists. They developed a classification of character strengths by examining concepts of positive characteristics of humans to identify six core virtues that religious and moral philosophers have, over history and across cultures, tied to human flourishing and achievement of the good life. The six virtues, according to these social scientists, are courage, humanity, justice, temperance, transcendence, and wisdom. These larger categories break down into twenty-four virtues or character strengths that are valued universally.\n\nPeterson, Seligman, and their group posit that people have a handful of these characteristics as their signature strengths. Indications of a signature strength are that people feel that the strength is an authentic reflection of who they are, have a fast learning curve for activities tied to that strength, and are invigorated and excited when using that strength. The idea is that people are better off trying to build on their individual signature strengths rather than trying to correct deficiencies. On his website, Seligman offers a questionnaire to help you identify your signature strengths. The key connection between these character strengths and happy lawyering is that \"[i]dentifying your strengths can help you find new work that is personally fulfilling and meaningful or alter your current work to become more personally fulfilling and meaningful.\" Peterson and Seligman suggest you consider a deep sort of happiness. Their focus is on ways to build on character strengths that may lead to longer term life fulfillment. Is what you are doing on a daily basis drawing on your strengths?\n\nSo you have answered Ben-Shahar's three questions and have taken Seligman's self-assessment to help identify your signature strengths. Where do you go from here? We suggest that you write not just a job description, but a sketch of the path you want your career to take.\n\n#### YOUR CAREER PATH\n\nUsing the questions below as a guide, draft a two-paragraph vision statement for your career. Paragraph one: What kinds of jobs would best match your personality, values, and skills? Paragraph two: Where do you want to be in ten years? Twenty?\n\n1. Do you have a general idea of what kind of career you want? Do you plan to practice law? What do you envision yourself doing in twenty years\u2014at the height of your career?\n\n2. What are your values? Do you value financial security? Time with your family and friends? Autonomy? Stability? Creativity? Do you want to have children? Do you like to take risks? Do you like variety? Do you like excitement and pressure or do you prefer life without stress? Do you desire leisure time to pursue various interests? Are your career plans consistent with your values?\n\n3. How do you want to spend your day? Do you like dealing with people? Do numerous meetings make you crazy, or do you welcome the time to noodle issues with colleagues? In what size groups do you work best: all alone, with one or two other people, with a larger group? Do you like spending large blocks of time researching and writing? Do you like detail work? Do you enjoy or hate business development? How do you feel about the prospects of litigation? Do you like to travel? Do you prefer new challenges or handling matters over which you have some mastery? Do you know what kinds of law do _not_ interest you?\n\n4. What kinds of hours do you envision yourself working as a lawyer: a mammoth number of hours, a 9 to 5 day, part-time? Are you someone who is able to create work life balance for yourself, or do you take on too much work?\n\n5. When you are considering a job, will the salary and benefits meet your basic minimum needs? Will some other factor be paramount in your job search (for instance, whether the work is meaningful to you or can keep your interest)?\n\n6. Are you interested in entering a type of law that might dictate that you live in a particular region (such as international law or water law)? Do you prefer cities? Large or small? Suburbs or rural areas? Domestic or international travel?\n\n7. Do you feel that other people (perhaps family members such as parents or partners) have specific expectations for what you will do with your law degree? Do they match yours? 8. What are your signature strengths as they relate to a legal career? Weaknesses?\n\n9. What are your interests or hobbies? Do they relate to your career plans? Can they?\n\n10. If you could not be a lawyer, what would you do? Do any of these alternate careers suggest what you could do with your law degree other than practice law?\n\nOnce you have a sense of the possible path you think you want to take, then you need to assess whether it is the right path. This is where you could encounter some cognitive stumbling blocks.\n\n#### THE FUTURE IS NOT EXACTLY CLEAR\n\nResearch in cognitive psychology shows that people systematically make inaccurate predictions about what will make them happy. In thinking about how to make your future self happy, you are likely to make two types of errors: prediction mistakes and, on the other hand, failures to follow those predictions that are accurate.\n\nLike other people, lawyers wrongly predict their emotional reactions to both positive and negative future events. They overestimate the joy that winning a multi-million dollar verdict will bring them, and they underestimate their ability to rebound from a denied promotion. In both circumstances, the context will moderate the effects of the event, and people will hedonically adapt and tend to return to their happiness set point. When you are considering that job offer from Parker, McBain & Chandler, LLC, you might assume that accepting an offer from one of the most prestigious firms in your city will bring you happiness. And it will\u2014for a while. Soon, however, the drudgery of day-to-day work will dampen the joy of the associational prestige.\n\nYou might also suffer from projection bias. People tend to assume that their future likes and dislikes will be similar to their current preferences. (This explains the tendency to overfill the grocery cart if you shop for food while you are hungry.) Daniel Gilbert observes, \"Because we naturally use our present feelings as a starting point when we attempt to predict our future feelings, we expect our future to feel a bit more like our present than it actually will.\" Your own behavior and many external factors will influence how your future self will react. If you are in your first year of law school, you may gravitate toward fast-paced jobs that promise the endorphin rush of trial work, such as being a prosecutor or public defender. You may, at present, have no other responsibilities so you can devote countless hours to trials. Three years from now, however, you may want a job with somewhat less excitement and more regular hours, so you can spend time with your nine month-old who isn't even a gleam in your eye at the moment. Gilbert suggests: \"if we want to predict how something will make us feel in the future, we _must_ consider the kind of comparison we will be making in the future and _not_ the kind of comparison we happen to be making in the present.\"\n\nEven when people make accurate predictions about the kinds of work that would make their future selves happy, they often fail to follow their predictions. Christopher Hsee and Reid Hastie, both professors of behavioral science at the University of Chicago, note that \"[a] major cause of sub-optimal decisions is impulsivity\u2014the choice of an immediately gratifying option at the cost of long-term happiness.\" You may have been a victim of your own impulsivity in the past if you have ever overindulged in food or drink. In the world of legal employment, at times people make impulsive decisions, accepting a job that has some immediate appeal\u2014it was the first one offered or a parent's good friend is a partner at the firm.\n\nAnother paradox of decision-making is that people are drawn to make rational or rule-based decisions, even if they predict that another type of experience would make them happier. For example, thinking they should follow a \"rule\" of seeking variety in experiences, people may choose a menu item other than their favorite when in fact they would be happier to repeatedly select the old standby item that they like the most. People also tend to assume that financial aspects of decisions should matter more than experiential aspects. Hsee and Hastie offer this example: \"when asked to choose between a 50\u00a2 small chocolate that looks like a heart and a $2 large chocolate that looks like a cockroach, most respondents opted for the larger cockroach-shaped chocolate, even though when asked to predict which they would enjoy more, most favored the smaller, hearted-shaped chocolate.\" If you are just embarking on your career, you may assume that the primary goal of the job search is to obtain the highest paying or most prestigious position possible. Instead, the evidence suggests that you should look for jobs that would give you the most experiential satisfaction or that would use your signature strengths.\n\nHow do you avoid the cognitive pitfalls? What if you think you would like a particular kind of legal job, but you just aren't sure? Or you were sure, at least until you read the last few paragraphs. We turn next to one of the best methods to steer clear of the shortcomings of our imaginations.\n\n#### INVESTIGATING POSSIBLE FUTURES\n\n_Before we set our hearts too much upon anything, let us first examine how happy those are who already possess it._\n\nThe best way to estimate your future happiness in a job is to ask people who currently hold that job whether they like their work\u2014look at surrogates for your future self. This is especially important for those of you just embarking on your law careers. Bill Davis, formerly a partner with a mid-sized law firm in North Carolina and then in-house counsel, suggests: \"look for 'success' stories in the environment you are considering and picture yourself relative to them, their skill sets and their personalities.\"\n\nYou need to get a picture of what, physically, you will be doing every day when you go in to the office. The actual day to day tasks and interactions can be as important as practicing in a particular substantive area. When you get up in the morning, you want to look forward to going to work. Every job has multiple dimensions, but two are key to happiness: what you will be doing on a daily basis, and with whom you will be doing it. \"Some days, one is more important than the other; but you need to have both,\" says Joan Heminway, a Tennessee law professor, who used to work in corporate mergers and acquisitions at Skadden Arps.\n\nPeople who practice the type of law that you think might be of interest can help you envision a day at the office. If you want more accurate information about whether you would like to try a capital case or write a patent application or conduct discovery in a behemoth class action, find people who are presently doing those things and ask them what they spend their days and night doing and particularly about the peaks and valleys in their work. One way to do this is to ask a lawyer in a particular specialty area for an \"informational interview.\" Don't just ask people whether they like their jobs\u2014most people say that they do. Ask them what the most satisfying parts of their jobs are, what aspects cause them the greatest stress or anxiety, what training they found most useful for their practice area, and whether they think their experiences are typical for that type of work.\n\nThe personal interview is not the only way to glean information about different careers from sources. Take advantage of public lectures. Approach professors who teach in the substantive areas that interest you. Most law schools also provide clinical opportunities and internships. According to a study done by Affiliates legal staffing service, \"90 percent of lawyers surveyed said internship experience was a key factor in selecting candidates for full-time positions.\" Internships or externships provide opportunities to assess your own reactions to certain types of practices. Summer associate experiences are also valuable, but courted and coddled \"summers\" would be well-advised to examine the lives of the junior associates they will become if they join the firm.\n\nThere is another source of potentially important information that could guide your job choice. After you get an offer and you are doing a final check on one or two firms, try to find out what has happened to associates from that firm from four or five years ago. Use Martindale-Hubbell (the books, the ones in the basement of the law library, not the up-to-date online version) to find the entering class of a firm from five years ago, compare that to the current associates list, see who left, and track several of them down to see why they moved to a new firm or position. By expanding your sample to include those who left and not just those who stayed, you can get a more accurate picture of the costs and benefits of your possible future job.\n\n#### INTERVIEWING FOR A MORE SATISFYING WORKPLACE\n\nMost career services offices offer a standard battery of books and handouts containing suggested interview guidelines. Most of these lists of sample questions are targeted toward impressing interviewers. Very few address ways to assess what a law firm's values are or the quality of life in that firm. We offer below a different sort of list, one that is attentive to both favorably impressing interviewers and helping you to probe more deeply for the kinds of things that will lead you toward a satisfying career.\n\n#### INTERVIEW STRATEGIES\n\nPresumably, before you have your first interview, you will have done your homework. You will know whether the firm's representative client list is big tobacco and axe murderers, or if it consists mainly of innocent victims of toxic mold and Bernie Madoff. You will know whether a senior partner has just been indicted or has just won the Congressional Medal of Honor. As you interview for a legal job, collect information about whether this is a place that fits with your values and interests, will appreciate your strengths, and will offer a satisfying work environment.\n\nThink about interviewing as roughly a two-stage process, corresponding in many instances to an initial round of oncampus interviews and a later in-house callback. An opening conversation with a firm or organization may not be the most opportune time to probe about the firm's work-life balance policy. During the initial interview you are trying to present yourself to law firms, rather than to assess all the benefits the firm can bestow upon you.\n\n##### _Initial Interviews_\n\nFor openers, most legal employers will typically ask a fairly standard series of questions, such as: Why do you want to practice law? Have you enjoyed law school and did you have a favorite course? What qualities do you have that you think will make you a good lawyer? Tell us about an obstacle you have overcome in life? Where do you see yourself in ten years? In these early conversations you can ask questions that reflect your interest in the firm's structure and your eagerness to work hard. Use your questions to glean information about the control the firm gives to associates, the feedback and training offered, and the interpersonal relations. May associates specialize in particular practice areas? Does the firm have any formal training, mentoring or business development programs for associates (e.g., are junior lawyers included in client pitches)? How does the firm evaluate associates' work, and are there any formal feedback systems? You should also ask what is the firm's governing structure (e.g., a single managing committee or several committee's on different issues), and what is the firm's overall growth plan? What is the typical length of the partnership track, and are attorneys expected to have an independent book of business for partnership? For litigation (or transactional work), what kinds of cases (or deals) would an associate be able to work on or exclusively handle?\n\nDepending on the available time and how the interview is going, you may also be able to ask additional questions about the kinds of people, qualities, and activities to which the firm attaches importance. Who are the heroes and heroines of the firm? Do you have a story about the way your firm has handled a case or some aspect of a case that is representative of your firm's values? You can learn a lot about whether a firm's values align with your own by hearing the victory stories (and war stories and horror stories) of a firm. The anecdotes people choose to tell you convey their own stories.\n\n##### _Later Interviews_\n\nDuring a second-round or in-house interview, you may be able to ask more probing questions designed to reveal how a firm or agency will match up with your happiness agenda. Below are some questions that you might want to ask of prospective law firms.\n\nThese questions do come with a warning label (forgive us, disclaimers are an occupational hazard): these aren't questions to ask as you would in a deposition or you will probably self-destruct during the interview. They are certainly not the only, probably not even the primary, questions you should ask during that second round. And they should be sprinkled in gently, over time, in between other questions, or you might want to figure the answers to them out for yourself without asking the questions directly.\n\n1. What are the firm's billable hour expectations? Do attorneys receive bonuses (or compensatory time off) if they exceed their targets or expectations?\n\n2. What kinds of responsibilities and decision latitudes are given to associates on cases? How about on personal matters? (e.g., Will I be able to arrange my own office, hang my own paintings, or bring in my own lamp?)\n\n3. Are attorneys able (or even encouraged) to set their own schedules? Are reduced hours, telecommuting, and flexible full-time schedules options for all lawyers (or only upon certain events, such as pregnancy or illness, or only after a certain number of years of service)? What percent of all associates and all partners opt for a reduced hours schedule? Are associates or partners who opt for reduced hours or flextime evaluated in the same manner as those working a traditional or set amount of hours? To what extent does the firm outfit home offices or provide technology reimbursement?\n\n4. How much vacation leave do attorneys get, but perhaps more importantly, do people really take it, do they feel pressured not to use it all, and are they tethered by e-mail and BlackBerrys during vacations?\n\n5. Is this a firm that plays to individual lawyers' strengths and interests? If lawyers want to pursue a new practice area interest as an associate or in midcareer, are there examples of the firm supporting lawyers to move in new directions?\n\n6. What amount of subsidized family (maternity, paternity, partner) leave does the firm provide? What percent of lawyers take the leave that is offered? Can lawyers negotiate unpaid sabbaticals apart from family leave?\n\n7. What type of personality does best in this firm? Are you looking for people who are driven or more laid back? How are conflicts (regarding cases or salaries or personnel) resolved?\n\n8. What efforts is the firm making to promote females and racial minorities into the top leadership positions at the firm? Does the firm have a director of diversity or a director of professional development? Do women\/racial minorities\/sexual minorities head practice groups? Sit on the firm's managing committee?\n\n9. What are the firm's turnover rates\u2014how many associates (and partners) leave each year?\n\n10. Apart from events to woo summer associates, in what kinds of events do members of the firm participate to play together (e.g., poker nights, sports, or a new parents group)? Do the lawyers in the firm go out to lunch together or get together regularly outside of work? What sorts of community involvement does the firm encourage and support?\n\nAfter the interviews are over, there is a question you need to ask yourself: do you think you will really like the people with whom you will be working?\n\n### FINAL THOUGHTS\n\nLet's end our conversation about your future on a fun and cheery note. Let's imagine your funeral.\n\nProfessor Larry Krieger, who is at the forefront of the humanizing legal education movement, offers a thought-provoking exercise: write your own eulogy.\n\nI ask participants to imagine a future time when they are retired and away from their current environment, perhaps traveling in a pleasant place. I have them imagine visiting a small, quiet gathering which then turns out to be a preview of their funeral. I then ask them to briefly write down the eulogies about themselves that, if they could attend their own funeral, they would like to hear from important others\u2014their life partner or best friend, a respected lawyer or judge that has known them in practice, a member of another community they valued during their life (church, neighborhood, service club, etc.), and if time allows, their child or another young person they had known. They may also be asked to write down the things that they would most like to be able to say about themselves\u2014the things about which they feel best when looking back on their life.\n\nThe results of this exercise are illuminating, because they show students and lawyers the kinds of things that matter most deeply to them. Participants are often surprised by the results. Almost invariably the qualities and values expressed in these eulogies are the most traditional human values and virtues: patience, decency, fairness, humility, courage, caring, integrity, willingness to work hard for worthwhile goals, helpfulness to others (family, friends, clients or community), and so forth. No one thus far in my experience has drafted a eulogy focused on a luxurious home, high grade point average, law review membership, or extraordinary income.\n\nWhile this exercise might seem to invite some of the predictive flaws of misimagining the future, it asks you to think now about how you want other people to think of you later. The point of it isn't to imagine an accurate future but to envision a future shaped by a life lived according to your personal values and intrinsic goals. It also brings home the point that these intrinsic virtuous qualities are unlimited and noncompetitive: \"In law school parlance, everyone can be in the Top Five Percent in kindness, patience, etc.\" If your focus in law school is on your own goals, and not those defined for you by the well-worn default paths, you are more likely to emerge from law school ready to embark on a career that will satisfy you.\n\n## **CHAPTER 6\n\nWhat Law Firms Can Do to Make Lawyers Happier**\n\n_We're a law firm. Time is billable. The client doesn't pay for small talk. Every minute you spend away from your desk is a minute the firm isn't making any money off your presence, even though you're still using the office supplies, eating the muffins, drinking the coffee, consuming the oxygen, and adding to the wear and tear on the carpets. You're overhead. And if you're not earning your keep, you shouldn't be here._\n\nJEREMY BLACHMAN'S SATIRICAL EXPOSE ON ELITE LAW firm life, _Anonymous Lawyer_ , a blog that became a book, is not the only bleak depiction of law firm life. William Keates kept a diary of his first year at a prestigious firm and published _Proceed With Caution_. Numerous other blogs, such as http:\/\/abovethelaw.com, catalog gossip, dubious achievements and horrors of law firm recruitment techniques, billable hour demands, associate abuse, office politics, and layoffs.\n\nIs it really that bad? Maybe not, but there is evidence that life, especially in larger firms, has taken a turn for the worse. The 2009 recession prompted salary freezes or cuts, delayed start dates for new associates and led to layoffs of both associates and partners. Beyond recession-induced turbulence, focus on the bottom line increasingly has made the comforts and relative stability of big firm life a thing of the past. From experienced attorneys the refrain is heard so often as to seem a mantra: \"Law is becoming just another business.\" Implicit in the complaint is the suggestion that law should be more than \"a business\"\u2014it should be a profession that places a high value on quality and service to the community. Older attorneys bemoan the emphasis today on meeting ever-higher billable hour requirements, the foregoing of face-to-face contact in favor of more efficient electronic communication, and the compromises in work product quality that are made to placate client cost concerns. They remember with fondness the clubbish colleagiality of their firm in days gone by, and they lament the loss of civility in their profession.\n\nThe good news is that, in response to these disturbing trends, some firms, corporations, and government agencies are reconsidering their personnel practices. A number of firms are implementing policies that allow their lawyers to find work-life balance or to reconnect with colleagues. If you are a partner at a law firm, the supervisor of in-house counsel, or the manager of a government or public interest organization (for shorthand reference, we will talk in terms of \"law firms\" for the most part), this chapter is for you. It addresses what you can do to make your firm a happier place and why you should do it.\n\n### FOUR REASONS LAW FIRMS SHOULD CARE ABOUT MAKING THEIR LAWYERS HAPPY\n\n#### **R EASON NUMBER 1:** HAPPY FIRMS KEEP GOOD LAWYERS\n\nThe primary resources of your law firm are your lawyers. If your firm is perceived as performing work of exceptional quality, you get the cases, the clients, and the fees. Your top talent can be lost if the lawyers are unhappy. The National Association of Law Placement conducted a survey of associate attrition at large firms in 2007 and found that within three years 37 percent of associates leave their firms, a figure that skyrockets to 77 percent within five years. Of course, there are a thousand reasons why a lawyer might leave a firm, but one of the most common is that the grass seems greener elsewhere\u2014in fact, the grass in the lawyer's former firm might have withered in the associate's eyes.\n\n#### **R EASON NUMBER 2:** KEEPING LAWYERS HAPPY SAVES MONEY\n\nEstimates of the amount it costs to replace a departing associate range from $200,000 to $500,000\u2014roughly one and one-half to two times the annual salary of that lawyer. If your firm loses five lawyers in a year, that is a one to two-and-a-half million dollar loss. The explicit costs of attorney turnover may include: severance pay and accrued vacation benefits, job advertisement for the now vacant position, recruiter's time and salary, interviewing expenses (including travel, meals, and hotel), reference checks, expenses for relocation, orientation and training of the new employee, and, possibly, signing bonuses. The behind-the-scenes costs\u2014such as lost productivity time, covering the work of the departing lawyer, client notification and perhaps mollification, as well as a morale drop among lawyers who remain\u2014can dwarf the explicit expenses.\n\n#### **R EASON NUMBER 3: HAPPY LAWYERS ARE** MORE PRODUCTIVE\n\nEvidence is mounting that happier workers are more productive and that happiness enhances performance. Happier people (who are more likely to have jobs in the first place) get better work evaluations and earn higher pay. They have less absenteeism and lower medical costs; they set higher goals and persist longer at cognitive tasks. In occupations outside of law, studies have shown that happiness is tied to numerous measures of better performance: people in a good mood are better negotiators than those in bad moods; they will make better managerial decisions, be more creative, and compliment the performance of those around them. It is reasonable to assume that positive expectations and happiness present the same correlations in law.\n\nThis is not to say your goal should be to keep lawyers in a constant state of euphoria. While happiness promotes creativity, it undermines precise focus because happier people are open to a variety of different kinds of information and lack the attention filter that negative emotions supply. Euphoria and detail work, the latter of which can be considerable in law firms, do not go hand in hand.\n\n#### **R EASON NUMBER 4: HAPPINESS IS ITS OWN REWARD**\n\nIn addition to saving valuable human resources and increasing productivity, creating a happier law firm will make you and the other lawyers in your firm happier. That, of course, is a reward in itself. As happiness begins to develop in a firm, it will spread of its own accord. You can \"catch\" happiness. If the lawyer next door is happy, if your secretary is happy, there's a good chance that their happiness will improve your mood as well.\n\nWe are social creatures, and our affective state is influenced by the emotions of people around us. People tend to spontaneously mimic the expressions and behaviors of other group members and to absorb, match, and mirror emotions of others through largely unconscious feedback mechanisms. Studies in organizational behavior show that group emotions\u2014such as morale, rapport, and cohesion\u2014and mood contagion in a workplace can be affected by words, nonverbal cues, policies, goals, and priorities. Negative moods also transfer between people and spread through a group. If you spend a significant amount of time around Debby Downer at your office, you may catch her negative mood. Disgruntled lawyers can spread their unhappiness like cold germs. The ability to infect other people works with cheerful as well as negative emotions. In short, both happiness and unhappiness are contagious.\n\n### OPTIMIZING, NOT MAXIMIZING, LAW FIRM HAPPINESS\n\nYour goal is not to maximize happiness but to optimize it. Ringing the party bell at 4:00 PM every day might boost firm happiness, but there are obvious costs to that as well. Your firm, after all, has clients to serve and income to earn.\n\nIf you want to just have a happy law firm, we'd suggest you hire a bunch of people with high happiness set points, typically optimistic extroverts. Hiring happy people, and only happy people, is the easiest way to improve firm happiness. But the serious business of law firms is better served by a mix of talented people with different happiness set points. Lawyers who have a tendency to be unhappy can still be excellent lawyers, better perhaps at worrying about details and negative outcomes. Remember Martin Seligman's observation about the positive dimensions of pessimism for lawyers. Happiness is a good thing, but it is possible to have too much of a good thing. For law firms today, however, too much happiness doesn't seem to be the problem. Too little happiness is.\n\n### ADDRESSING FIRM HAPPINESS: IT'S A WHOLE NEW GAME\n\nForces are driving law firms to revolutionize their traditional structures and ways of doing business. Push for change is coming from a variety of quarters\u2014not just from lawyers who would like time with their families but also from clients who prefer flat rate (per project) billing and who demand diversity in the law firms that do their work, from the American Bar Association (ABA) (which urged lawyers in 2002 to rethink the billable hour), and from students who will be the next generation of lawyers. Moving towards a happier law firm sometimes involves swimming with the current.\n\n#### UNDERSTANDING GENERATIONAL DIFFERENCES\n\n_Generation Y and women want a life balance.... The 50-year-olds don't understand that, but they're in a bind because there are not enough bodies to do the work. It's forcing law firms to think in different ways._\n\nJust when you were beginning to understand some of the generational differences of your firm's newest partners, the Gen X'ers, you realize that the next generation of your firm will be staffed by the Gen Y associates you recently hired. Seventy million strong, GenY'ers (or \"Millennials\") are the next wave of the American workforce. Lawyers from Generation X (born between 1965\u201379) and Generation Y (born between 1980\u20132000) often work in law firms where the senior partners are either Baby Boomers (born between 1946\u201364) or members of a Traditionalist generation (born before 1946).\n\nAs arbitrary as these labels might be for people born just a year apart (and odd that the \"generations\" vary from fourteen to twenty years in length), generational research can still offer some useful information. Obviously, these are group characteristics as well as sweeping generalizations. Some Gen Y'ers might have old-time values and some Baby Boomers have work attitudes indistinguishable from their younger co-workers.\n\nWork-life balance is more important to more contemporary generations than income. Ellen Freedman, a law practice management coordinator, says that Gen X'ers \"value flexibility in the work environment and expect significant recognition and rewards but are willing to take significantly reduced compensation in return for a more balanced lifestyle.\" Gen Y lawyers are sociable and want mentoring, teamwork, and feedback; they are also \" 'intolerant of drudgery.' \"\n\nGen X'ers and Gen Y'ers have much less firm loyalty or interest in a career commitment to a single firm. More than half (58 percent) of Traditionalists cited commitment to the company as most important, while less than a third (32 percent) of Gen Y'ers did so. For Traditionalists job changing carries a stigma; if you are a Boomer, you may see shifting jobs as creating a competitive disadvantage; for younger lawyers, changing jobs is necessary, expected, or routine. Remember that studies show that commitment is important to job satisfaction. If you are busy looking for your next job, it is hard to develop trust, commit to, and engage in your existing job. The reluctance of younger generations to commit to their present jobs might be an obstacle to happiness.\n\nDifferent generations come to the firm with different expectations. Boomers and Traditionalists are accustomed to face to face communications, including face time at the office, while younger generations who grew up with cell phones and computers are used to electronic communication and working from remote locations. Newer generations, raised by supportive, engaged parents who included them in decision making, expect transparency and the ability to participate in making decisions: \"They prefer egalitarian leadership, not hierarchies.\" Members of Gen Y have been treated as important and special, and they desire immediate and frequent positive feedback.\" 'Older workers think no news is good news. [Gen Y'ers] want pats on the back. Older people tend to be thankful for a job and younger workers really want some praise and recognition.' \" Members of this multitasking generation (known in some circles as \"the iGeneration\"), who text message at the speed of wifi and TiVo television shows, expect instant access to information and are accustomed to an unprecedented amount of control over their lives. While Boomers prize recognition in tangible forms, such as money or a corner office, Gen X'ers see freedom as the ultimate reward, while Gen Y'ers seek work that is meaningful to them.\n\nWhat does the current generational mix mean for sound law firm policies that promote overall happiness? It underscores the importance of recognizing that different things may make different cohorts more or less satisfied and appreciating that each generation brings helpful ideas to the table. The commitment espoused by Traditionalists is good for happiness and so is the feedback and mentoring promoted by Gen Y'ers. Gen X'ers want to work smarter rather than harder, and they tend to like flexibility. Gen Y'ers each have their individual playlists: they want to be judged based on their productivity and the quality of their work, not their seniority. As we discuss later in this chapter, some firms are moving to differential incentive systems, more family-friendly work arrangements, greater social interaction opportunities, and more explicit feedback systems. While there is no perfect recipe for law firm happiness, each generation offers promising ingredients.\n\nX'ers are looking for a team where they can make a meaningful contribution. Boomers did, and still do, want the same. X'ers want sufficient access to information. Doesn't everyone? X'ers want extrepreneurship, defined as room in the work to define problems, develop solutions at their own pace, and produce their own results. This is the very essence of a lawyer's work for her clients. X'ers want personal attention, mentoring, and loyalty. All successful lawyers feel the same.\n\n#### ADDRESSING CLIENT DEMANDS\n\nAcross the country, clients are calling for changes in traditional hourly billing methods\u2014the same thing that lawyers complain about from a different direction. Studies have demonstrated \"the potential conflict of interest between resolving disputes efficiently and billing clients by the hour.\" Financial incentives discourage efficiency and encourage padding of hours.\n\nIn some circles use of hourly billing may diminish due to pressures from clients. A number of large companies that outsource their legal work have begun to negotiate a fixed fee (one price for handling a series of matters) or a flat rate (a set cost per task) rather than billable-hour arrangements. Alternative fee arrangements still remain an alternative lifestyle for now: 83 percent of the general counsel responding to a 2008 Altman Weil survey said that, excluding discounted hourly rates, \"they used alternative fee arrangements less than 10 percent of the time.\" However, three-quarters of managing heads of Am Law 200 firms (the nation's two hundred highest grossing law firms) think that in the next decade \" 'many if not most' big firms will change their billing practices,\" and two-thirds said that some form of fixed-rate deals were being negotiated.\n\nSome of the country's largest corporations are also beginning to demand that the law firms to which they outsource their work not only hire appropriate numbers of female and minority attorneys but have those attorneys billing their time on the companies' work. In 2004, Rick Palmore, general counsel of Sara Lee, issued an open letter entitled A Call to Action: Diversity in the Legal Profession, urging corporations to insist that law firms performing work for them make a commitment to diversity. Since then, the commitment statement has acquired 136 corporate signatories, from such corporations as General Mills, General Motors, Hewlett Packard, Johnson & Johnson, Microsoft, Shell Oil, Starbucks, Target, and Walmart.\n\nThis corporate insistence on diversity has practical consequences for lawyers. To obtain the work of these corporate giants, law firms have responded by heeding the Call to Action and staffing their cases with lawyers who are women or racial minorities. Law firms are learning that diversity makes business sense. But does diversity lead to happiness?\n\n#### CONTEMPLATING WORKPLACE DIVERSITY\n\nFirms used to be good ol' boy networks, with no pressures to become more diverse along any dimension. Partners and associates were white, male, and upper middle class and played golf. Law firm demographics have changed enormously in the past several decades: law firms today are diverse in numerous ways. Although golf is still a constant, now it is as likely to be played with a Wii on a \"virtual golf course\" as it is at a country club.\n\nWhether a diverse law firm is, for that reason, a happy law firm, remains an open question. On the one hand, among the happiest nations in the world are those that are homogeneous, such as Scandinavian countries. The same can be said of homogenous neighborhoods, according to Robert Putnam, author of _Bowling Alone._ Putnam's study of diversity in communities found that ethnically diverse communities had substantially lower levels of \"neighborly trust,\" lower levels of voter participation, lower levels of confidence in government, a reduced rate of volunteerism, and \"less happiness and lower perceived quality of life\" than more homogeneous communities. At the level of personal interaction, considerable evidence suggests that people empathize more readily with others to whom they are similar in key ways. Much of this evidence (other country, community, and interpersonal relationship data) does not specifically apply to the workplace, and it is not clear what conclusions should be drawn for workplace happiness until more studies are conducted.\n\nOn the other hand, diversity unquestionably has educational and economic values, and differences enhance creativity. Lawyers who are members of Gen Y get satisfaction from being around others from different backgrounds. Social critic Malcolm Gladwell observes that \"in embracing the diversity of human beings, we will find a surer way to true happiness.\" Law firms are also seeing that attention to diversity\u2014training about micro-inequities, creating accommodations for attorneys having child or elder care responsibilities through part-time status or the ability to work from home, and developing \"parenting leave\" handbooks and mentoring programs\u2014improves satisfaction with working conditions and retention of women and racial minorities. The same individualized attention and flexible work policies are good for members of majority groups as well; firms that are family-friendly and sensitive to the individual needs of their lawyers tend to be happier places to work. And Putnam, despite the evidence he accumulated questioning whether diversity promotes happiness, ultimately concluded that diversity was a value worth pursuing. He noted that while diversity initially makes people uncomfortable, \"One great achievement of human civilization is our ability to draw more inclusive lines of social identity. The motto on the Great Seal of the United States (and on our dollar bill)\u2014e pluribus unum\u2014reflects precisely that objective\u2014namely, to create a novel 'one' out of a diverse 'many.' \" While the jury is still out on whether a more diverse law firm is a happier firm, we conclude that a more diverse firm is\u2014no small thing\u2014a better firm.\n\n### TEN STEPS THAT COULD MAKE YOUR LAW FIRM A HAPPIER WORKPLACE\n\nHappiness at a law firm has several aspects. The overall reputation of a firm\u2014is it a happy place to work or not\u2014is one dimension of employee satisfaction in the job domain. At the firm level, positive behavior, such as focusing on enhancing employees' attributes of loyalty, resilience or compassion (as opposed to criticism), correlates with employee commitment, retention, and productivity as well as various measures of corporate success. There is also \"facet-specific happiness,\" or attorney satisfaction with specific tasks while working at the firm, such as the degree of control over their own cases, clarity of directions, or feedback. Managers who are successful in raising attorney satisfaction will attend to generalized domain (or job) satisfaction as well as \"facet-specific\" happiness having to do with the attractiveness of different tasks. We will address some aspects of both of these dimensions throughout these steps.\n\n#### 1. PROMOTING LAWYER AUTONOMY\n\nStudies of attorney satisfaction show that if your job gives you significant autonomy, you are more likely to be happy. Conversely, satisfaction is lower if you are subjected to constraints on your decisions and work setting and circumstances. In 2001, the nonprofit research group Catalyst surveyed a sample of 1,400 lawyers who graduated from one of five elite law schools: University of California-Berkeley, Columbia, Harvard, Michigan, and Yale. Catalyst asked the participants to rank the top five sources of satisfaction for them in their jobs. Control over work was the leading source of satisfaction for men (68 percent) and the third highest source of satisfaction for women (57 percent). This result is consistent with other research on reported dimensions of job satisfaction.\n\nAn absence of control (low decision latitude), combined with high workload demands and high stakes outcomes, describes the work life of many associates. For firms that find ways to provide associates greater freedom to choose the cases they work on, or greater ability to control the cases they are assigned, the satisfaction, loyalty, and productivity payoffs could be immense. A step in the direction of greater lawyer autonomy, one that probably would not undermine other firm goals, would be to turn over smaller files to associates (combined with good mentoring of progress). If this were done at a significantly reduced hourly rate, more junior lawyers could gain valuable experience\u2014and clients would be more satisfied with the fees. Another approach might be to have younger lawyers, who are researching projects, explain their research results to the partner and then be the ones to brief the client. \"You learn how to practice law by practicing law\"\u2014and newer lawyers need meaningful responsibilities to acquire skills.\n\nAssociate happiness is also likely to be increased if you encourage development of each lawyer's specific strengths and skill sets. When you have a series of projects, rather than following the traditional route of individual partners tapping particular associates, send a memo to several associates with a brief squib about the projects and permit them to self-select work assignments. If you have a mentoring program, allow the junior lawyers who are being mentored to choose their mentors or express preferences for one of several possible mentors. This is essentially a no-cost proposition for firms, and it is a way of affording choices to newer attorneys. (If one partner is the perennial favorite and another is never selected as a mentor, perhaps that should indicate something about the appropriate compensation of those partners?)\n\nFinally, your firm can make its lawyers happier by letting employees make choices about their own work environments. Is it really necessary that every office have standard-issue furniture and the same antique white walls, or could employees be allowed to exercise some personal choice? Could that edict addressing the removal of personal pictures from office walls be rescinded? Could employees be given a greater say concerning what neighborhood in your sprawling four-stories of offices they are housed?\n\n#### 2. TAKING OFF THE BILLABLE HOURS STRAITJACKET\n\nWhen asked what they dislike most about the practice of law, many lawyers will answer \"billable hours\" or some variation on the theme: \"that my worth is tied to billing hours\"; \"unrealistic billable hour expectations\"; \"because of the hours I work, I have no outside life.\" In response to a 2005 National Association for Law Placement (NALP) Foundation survey asking attorneys the single most influential factor prompting them to change jobs, the factor checked by the largest percentage of respondents was \"reduction of work hours.\" Of the more than 2,300 respondents to an _ABA Journal_ survey, 84 percent said they would be willing to receive less income in exchange for a lower billable hours requirement. These are not just associates or younger attorneys. Almost half of the attorneys in management positions would gladly give up some portion of their salary in return for more family or free time. But, if lawyers have to ask for release time, flexibility, or alternative salary arrangements, rather than have the firm offer those as clearly available options, the lawyers who seek them may be seen as subpar or undedicated players. It will take structural changes to get around the perceptions that alternative time and salary arrangements are perversely different.\n\n#### 3. PROVIDING WORK-LIFE BALANCE\n\n_Nearly two-thirds of all lawyers report difficulty managing the demands of work and personal\/family life._\n\nLawyers want more work-life balance than they have now. The buzz-phrase is rampant; it's just that nobody seems to have much of the real thing. More than one-third of the male lawyers and almost one-half of female lawyers cited \"work-life balance as one of their top three reasons for selecting their current employer.\"\n\n##### _The Law Student Revolt_\n\nPressure for change is coming from law students at some of the nation's most elite schools. In the spring of 2007, a group of students at Stanford Law School and other law schools calling itself Law Students Building a Better Legal Profession (BBLP) sent letters to one hundred prestigious law firms urging them to reduce billable hours and implement work-life balance policies. The organization also produced rankings of firms based on how compatible firms' policies were with a balanced life for associates. BBLP urged firms to lower the number of billable hours expected per year, move toward flat rate or transactional billing, increase diversity, offer more time for pro bono work, and make work expectations transparent by publicizing the median hours that associates and partners work. Specifically, the group called for firms to implement \"balanced hours policies\" that would expressly approve of associates working \"80%, 70% or 60% of fulltime hours for proportional pay.\"\n\nProfessors Marc Galanter and William Henderson raise concerns about complications of staffing projects and question whether such a proposal is economically realistic: \"a lawyer who works 70% of the typical full-time load is unlikely to deliver a pro rata return on his or her time because fixed overhead for office space and support staff is not thereby proportionately reduced.\" Given this concern, compensation for less than full-time workers probably needs to reflect something less than the proportional hours worked\u2014say, 70 percent of full-time pay for working 80 percent of normal hours. Regardless of the specifics of the compensation scheme, firms need to make clear to the new generation of lawyers what work expectations are.\n\nCraig Segall, a Stanford Law 3L at the time of the group's founding, expressed the hope that law students at \"Tier 1\" law schools such as his own had \"the market power\" to make law firms more humane. Segall recognized the forces his group was up against, forces which have only been exacerbated by the recent recession. \"We are not so na\u00efve to think the situation will change over night,\" Segall wrote. \"Law students are hard to organize and this is a problem that's been developing for decades.\"\n\nOf course, not all law students and lawyers agree. In response to a _Wall Street Journal_ article about BBLP, some law students wrote of their willingness to work for long hours even if members of the new organization chose not to. One student, who indicated that he or she was \"dying to work hard,\" suggested to BBLP supporters: \"Can't take the heat? Stay out of the kitchen. Go work your 1600 hours in some other industry.\" Another unsympathetic lawyer wrote, \"Bottom line, they want the associational prestige of working at a brand name without having to put in the hours.\" Yet another lawyer suggested that the students consider working at smaller firms for \"sane hours\" but with less pay.\n\nThe student-promoted revolution may not be taking hold among associates\u2014particularly in tougher economic times. You are not likely to hear associates complaining as loudly as these law students about work-life balance issues, however unhappy they may be. As Segall noted, associates are poorly positioned to influence change: \"Associates have very little market power and, due to the lousy conditions they work in, many plan to leave after a few years.\"\n\nDoes this budding student revolt, centered at Tier 1 law schools, deserve a response from the nation's largest firms? Firms may conclude that the near constant availability of associates is critical to their clients, or that the economic efficiency that comes from assigning a single lawyer to work eighty hours instead of having two work forty hours each might seem irresistible. Firms could easily believe, and they might well be right, that their associational prestige will continue to attract a steady stream of topflight legal talent from law schools despite a generation's growing concern with work\u2013life balance. As one person commenting on the BBLP campaign saw it, the \"social capital\" of prestigious firms, with their \"cool buildings\" and \"cool addresses\" and \"cool art collections\" and especially high salaries, holds a huge appeal for graduates from national law schools.\n\nStanford Law School Dean Larry Kramer recently bemoaned the \"tendency of students from elite schools to go disproportionately to large firms\"\u2014a tendency which he said had grown \"more pronounced in recent years.\" Kramer worried that \"too many of our graduates have gone to these firms for the wrong reason\u2014and with predictable results, including boredom, frustration, and early lateral movement.\" The desire to \"add another prestigious line on a resume,\" says Kramer, proves irresistible to today's top students \"who have been taught from an early age to collect gold stars.\"\n\nEven if a steady stream of stellar recruits continue to come through their doors, we believe that BBLP raises issues that law firms should address. There are obvious economic and other efficiencies that derive from the current structure, but the willingness of new hires to work for less suggests that compromises can be made that won't seriously harm the bottom line. Whether the group can live up to the billing of its title is an open question, but the legal profession has never seen a movement quite like this one\u2014a grassroots organization, tapping the power of the labor market and using the capabilities of the internet to disseminate comparative data about law firms. More important, increasingly inhumane work environments have implications for how law is practiced, because harried, unhappy lawyers are undoubtedly more likely to be uncivil, cut corners, and engage in unethical practices. Moreover, weighing mightily for addressing some of BBLP's key concerns are all the advantages, laid out elsewhere in this book, that come to all members of a happy workplace.\n\nRichard Thaler and Cass Sunstein, in their important bestseller _Nudge: Improving Decisions About Health, Wealth, and Happiness_ , demonstrate how the architecture of choice shapes public and private decision-making. Their insights could be used by a firm seeking to maximize lawyer choice while moving towards a better work-life balance and overall level of happiness within a firm. Thaler and Sunstein note, for example, that people derive roughly twice as much unhappiness from losing a certain amount of money than they derive happiness from winning the same amount. A $50 loss causes the same value of negative feelings as a $100 win causes positive feelings. Most people, in other words, are \"loss averse.\" When people think about what they have lost, or what they didn't get that most people got, they are not happy campers. This would explain why most lawyers who are told \"You can give up 20 percent of your pay in return for working proportionally fewer hours\" might be unlikely to accept the offer, Instead, they will continue to grind away toward their unhappiness-producing 2,000 billable hours. However, if new hires are told, \"We expect you to put in 1600 billable hours for $X (an amount equal to, say, 20 percent less than what is paid those who produce 2,000), but you have the option of working 2,000 hours and receiving a _bonus_ (an amount that would bring pay up to the level currently paid for meeting the 2,000-hour expectation),\" a much higher number of recruits might opt for the reduced pay and reduced hours, thus improving the overall psychological health of the firm. Why? Because the reduced hours for reduced pay, having become the default option, no longer is associated in the new lawyer's mind with \"a loss.\"\n\nSusan C. Robinson, dean of career services at Stanford Law School, offers another idea for producing \"happy well-trained lawyers who not only stay in their firms, but in the profession.\" Robinson suggests that firms drastically cut starting salaries, say to the $80,000 range, and use the savings to create a formal apprenticeship period during which new lawyers would have reduced-hour expectations and gain the ability \"to cut their teeth on engaging legal work\"\u2014something they lost when clients began balking at paying \"high-priced billable hours for untrained associates.\" Several large law firms have already moved in the direction of apprenticeship-style programs. Howrey, a 600-plus lawyer firm, announced a pay cut for starting associates, coupled with training: \"from $160,000 to $100,000 in base pay plus a $25,000 bonus to pay down law school loans\u2014and they'll spend a good portion of their time attending classes with partners and shadowing them on client matters.\" The firm will bill out new associates at half of prior billing rates, and has low billable hour expectations for the associates: 700 hours the first year and 1,000 hours the second year. Although the program will cost Howrey in terms of lost billable hours and partner time for training, the firm expects costs savings in starting salaries and larger gains down the road in associate loyalty and efficiency, as well as client public relations. As Robinson sees it, an apprenticeship period will bring relief to the new associates \"burned out by the numbers of hours they are expected to clock and the tedium of the tasks they do.\"\n\n##### _Structural Changes in Firms_\n\nMany large firms are making structural changes that allow their lawyers to find better work-life balance. These range from providing greater parenting leave to allowing workers to adopt flex-time schedules. _Working Mother_ magazine and the national consulting group Flex-Time Lawyers compiled its second annual list of the fifty best law firms for women. Top ranking firms offer flexible work schedules and generous parenting leave. Among these top ranking firms, the average paid maternity leave is fourteen weeks; the average paid paternity leave is almost six weeks. Larger firms tend to have written policies, while smaller firms tend toward more variation, allowing leave that builds on sick leave and accrued vacation time. Of course, the more some firms extend maternity, paternity, and parenting leave, the more that other firms will need to do so to remain competitive.\n\nVarious types of flexible arrangements have been tested in law firms. These approaches include flex time (no standard working hours, and individual lawyers arrange their own schedules); a compressed work week (say, four ten-hour days instead of five eight-hour days); staggering work hours (for instance, working five nine-hour days one week, and four the next week), telecommuting with computer access to the law firm's files; part-time work (simply a reduced number of hours expected); and jobsharing. Some firms employ new position categories (such as \"of counsel\" or \"permanent associate\"), while others adopt the target hours approach. Under the target hours method, firms publish the average billable and nonbillable hours worked by lawyers in different practice areas, according to years in practice and status level. Each attorney and his or her supervisor agree on a target number of hours for the upcoming year based on the firm's needs and the attorney's individual circumstances. Deborah Epstein Henry, president of Flex-Time Lawyers, a national work-life balance consulting firm, points out that \"full-time\" and \"part-time\" are concepts that tend to stigmatize and do not accurately reflect work done in different areas of specialization: \"For associates at the same firm in the same year, a 'full-time' mergers and acquisitions lawyer may bill 2,300 hours and a 'full-time' trusts and estates lawyer may bill 1,800 hours, while a 'part-time' litigator may bill 1,800 hours and a 'part-time' family lawyer may bill 1,500 hours.\"\n\nOf Canadian lawyers who have used some type of flexible work arrangement, telecommuting (which eliminates commuting time and costs) was the most popular, with 77 percent of lawyers using it; flextime was chosen by 31 percent of lawyers, while a reduction in hours was used by 30 percent of lawyers. Telecommuting can boost happiness of telecommuters because it allows them to gain a huge amount of control over when and where their work is performed. However, because relationships matter, firms might not be creating happier workplaces by taking workers (except the real sourpusses) out of the office. We will see this tension repeated with other dimensions of workplace happiness: some solutions that may give a satisfaction boost in one direction undermine it in another way.\n\n##### _Underutilization of Existing Policies\u2014A Public Relations Problem?_\n\nAlthough 98 percent of the 1,500 mostly larger law offices responding to a NALP survey in 2008 said that they permit part-time work schedules, only 5.6 percent of all lawyers work part-time. Most of them are women. One feature limiting usage nationally is that more than one-half of firms offering part-time schedules precluded entry-level associates from using that option. Of those employees who are eligible, many may not be aware of part-time alternatives, and many more may be hesitant to pursue that career path. In one study, more than nine out often managing partners reported that their firms permitted attorneys to work less than full time, yet only six out often associates either knew of the policy or thought it was a realistic option.\n\nGender stereotypes of various types can keep participation in flexible work arrangements low. Female attorneys may assume that they have to work harder than male attorneys to avoid being perceived as less capable or committed to their careers. Male attorneys may even be told that a \"real man does not take parental leave.\" Even if your firm supports attorney freedom or family commitments, lawyers perceive that using parenting leave time or flexible work arrangements will undermine their status in firms and have a negative impact on their careers. A majority of lawyers responding to one survey said that they did not think a lawyer who opted for either a full- or part-time flexible work arrangement could ever make partner. Some research has shown that both men and women who use part-time or family-friendly policies in law firms are perceived as less competent than other full-time workers. If firms really want to promote work satisfaction, they need to make it possible for associates to work reduced schedules and still become partner.\n\nDespite the stigma and the problem of a part-time workload creeping into a full-time gig (while the attorney is still only paid for part-time work), lawyers who have these agreements are typically very satisfied with them. Consider the situation of Mary Jo Foster, then an associate at Streich Lang, who asked to work reduced hours when she adopted twin infants. She was expected to bill 80 percent of the usual billable hours target, and her compensation was reduced by 25 percent (the 5 percent difference went to overhead costs), but she kept full benefits. This arrangement eliminated most night and weekend work for her. She says, \"'Most people in the firm didn't even realize that I was working a reduced-hours schedule.' \" Attorneys with variable-hour arrangements who litigate confess that depositions, trials, and travel require juggling of their commitments but that they still prefer the freedom of time.\n\nOne of the best ways to help your attorneys create work-life balance is to set realistic billable hour targets or eliminate billable hour minimums and convey average expectations. Although most law firms in America do precisely the reverse, the ABA's Law Practice Management Section suggests limiting the rewards attached to billable hours exceeding your firm's expectations.\n\nAlthough the movement toward individual schedules is slow to take off, the demand for individualization is increasing, and new work-hour arrangements are emerging. Managers may worry that these changes could cause workers to make comparisons between their arrangements. However, comparisons in the workplace are inevitable. The focus of comparative judgments in the workplace today is based primarily on salary: full-time fourth year Associate X contrasts his salary to that of full-time fourth year Associate Y. With a more flexible approach, these comparisons will include both compensation and workload. Individuated hourly plans offer flexibility and respond well to employees' desires for control of their work flow. They also respond to the specific attention that newer generations of workers crave. Although individualization undoubtedly swallows a significant amount of management time, the benefits to law firms\u2014in attorney loyalty, firm morale, and economics\u2014can be enormous.\n\n##### _Flexibility and Law Firm Productivity_\n\nJames Sandman, the managing partner of Arnold & Porter, detailed the economic case for creating part-time programs. He observed that \"an accessible part-time program enables firms to compete both in the market for talent and for clients: recruits appreciate the option to attempt to balance work and personal needs and clients appreciate committed attorneys who are sometimes better able to focus on their cases because they are assigned fewer of them.\"\n\nAlthough limited data directly relates to law firms, experiences in other industries show that job flexibility reduces attrition, and there is no reason to suspect law would be different. One study of Washington, D.C., law firms showed that alternative scheduling arrangements were profitable for firms and helped them retain high performing attorneys. Michael Nannes of Dickstein, Shapiro, Morin & Oshinsky \"discovered a startling fact: 'We were losing lawyers not to other law firms, but to other schedules.' \"\n\nLaw firm managers tend to think in terms of comparing the productivity of lawyers working full time with those working reduced hours and conclude that a full-time worker would be more productive. However, if the analysis is based on \"productivity for the amount of time worked...lawyers working alternative work schedules are often more productive on a pro rata basis than their full-time colleagues. Because lawyers on alternative work schedules have a limited amount of time within which to complete their work, they are forced to be more organized and efficient.\" Studies confirm this. They show that attorneys who work part time are more efficient than their full-time counterparts. Anecdotal evidence indicates that attorneys who work part time typically work more than the agreed number of hours. One attorney who has worked in a job sharing arrangement for years comments, \"Hiring two attorneys to job share often leads to the productivity of 1.5 attorneys working full time.\"\n\n#### 4. ENCOURAGING A POSITIVE ATTITUDE\n\nAs a managing partner, you may use emotional contagion\u2014in the form of orientation lectures, pep talks, or training sessions\u2014to foster a \"can do\" atmosphere. Associates fresh from law school may need to hear this message early on, because many have been trained as problem finders rather than problem solvers. (It may also be in the associate's interest to spot the difficulties with architecting a deal or pursuing an avenue of discovery, because the associate will probably be the one doing the work, even while it is usually in the firm's interest to do the additional work.)\n\nAllen Rostron, now a law professor, tells a story about his first day as an associate at the prestigious New York firm of Cravath, Swaine & Moore. Much of the day was devoted to mundane orientation tasks, from filling out paperwork to being issued a coffee mug with the firm's name on it. The orientation also had a more serious side, as the new crop of nervous but eager associates gathered to hear several of the firm's partners talk about what the firm expected of its associates. The message was hardly a warm and fuzzy welcome. One of the partners, a very formal, somber lawyer from the corporate finance group, briefly welcomed everyone to the firm and then paused to look at each person around the table, as if to let anticipation build for a moment to underscore the importance of what he would say next. \"There is one thing that it's important for you to know from the very start,\" he finally continued. \"If anything goes wrong on any matter that you are working on, it is your fault. Nothing that happens is ever anybody else's fault. It's always your fault.\" \"For goodness sakes, it's my first day, I haven't even done anything yet, and it's already all my fault,\" Rostron remembers thinking. As the partner elaborated on what he meant by this, the reaction of his audience slowly but dramatically shifted. The partner explained that the firm expected and needed excellence from each of its attorneys, from the top down to the most junior associates. \"So when you get assigned to a deal, or a case,\" the partner said, \"you've got to realize that it's yours. You've got to have the attitude that you're responsible for it, and you're going to make sure everything works. You can't sit back and wait for somebody to give you a list of tasks to do. You've got to own these things, and tell yourself that you're going to be on top of it.\" That's why, the partner explained, you should feel like anything that goes wrong is your fault. \"You can't ever pass the buck,\" the partner said. \"If there's an error in the document, you can't say, 'well, it was the secretary's fault.' Because you should have given more precise instructions, double checked it, or done whatever was necessary to make sure it got done right.\" As the associates listened, they realized that the partner's message was not what it had seemed at first. It wasn't about getting yelled at and blamed or being afraid of getting in trouble. It wasn't about what a partner or anybody else was going to think about you or say to you. It was about how you were going to think and what you were going to say to yourself. Ultimately, and ironically, believing \"it's always my fault\" was a positive message about taking control.\n\nThe partner later offered another example of the \"can do\" attitude that the firm demanded of its lawyers, even the newly minted associates. \"Any time a client asks if the firm can do something,\" the partner said, \"the first word out of your mouth should always be 'yes.' Always. The answer is never 'no.' \" If the client calls one evening and asks if we can write a complex brief and file it the following morning, the answer should be \"yes.\" If the client asks if we can restructure the deal at the last minute, the answer should be \"yes.\" \"Now, of course,\" the partner went on, \"that 'yes' often will need to be followed by a lot more explanation. You may need to follow the 'yes' with a lot of serious warnings about the disadvantages and costs, the serious logistical difficulties that will have to be overcome, the alternative options, the corners that might have to be cut to file so quickly, the risks of making significant changes to what is already in place, and so on. But you always start with the 'yes.' \" Finally cracking a smile, the partner said, \"In fact, sometimes when a client asks if we can do something, you'll have to say 'yes\u2014absolutely, we can do that\u2014we can achieve your goal.... But of course we'll have to do it in a somewhat different manner, because what you just described is totally illegal.\" Again, the partner's point was that Cravath expected its associates to be problem solvers, not just problem spotters. \"There are a lot of lawyers out there who are good at telling clients what they can't do,\" a tax partner said later in the meeting. \"But that's not the sort of lawyer you want to be. You want to be the creative lawyer who figures out the way that it can be done.\"\n\nThe partners at Cravath spent time trying to shape a firm culture toward the positive. They made the points about the responsibility, control, and importance of each new associate\u2014qualities that the literature indicates are associated with happiness\u2014and emphasized that the new lawyers needed to be positive about achieving the goals the client wants. The danger of going too far in this direction is sometimes seen in business climates, where a \"can do\" attitude can become an Enron-like \"we can do whatever we want\" attitude, with excessive hubris and inappropriate attention to risks. But, as lawyers, we do not seem to have this dangerous unbounded optimism.\n\n#### 5. VALUING EMPLOYEES\n\nThe happiness literature does not dictate any single right way to structure law firm compensation systems. There is no one size-tickles-all model to recommend. Different systems will make various camps of people more or less satisfied. The one general statement than can be safely made is that lawyers are happiest when they think their work has been fairly valued.\n\n##### _Can't Buy Me Love: Partnership Structure, Firm Profits, and Satisfaction_\n\nHistorically, law firms had two categories of lawyers\u2014partners and associates\u2014with many larger firms using a seniority-based lock-step compensation system for their associates in which all associates ratchet ahead yearly with their class. Today your firm may have equity partners or shareholders, nonequity or income partners, associates, permanent associates, and a variety of \"of counsel\" positions, staff, and contract attorneys. Eighty percent of the country's two hundred largest firms have a two-tier partner structure. According to a study of Am Law 200 firms, whether your firm has a single-tier partnership structure or a modified partnership structure does not have a statistically significant effect on associate satisfaction. Associates' reactions to the structure of the partnership seem to depend more upon individual risk preferences and perceptions of how the structure might affect them: \"Some associates appreciate modified partnership structures' potential allowance for a stronger work-life balance. Others are angered by the additional structural barriers to election to equity partnership.\"\n\nA number of studies demonstrate an inverse correlation between law firm profits and the reported satisfaction levels of associates and partners. One study found negative correlations between both the profitability and prestige of law firms and lawyers' responses along various dimensions of satisfaction, such as family friendliness of the firm, desirability of working conditions, and firm openness regarding its finances. A study of University of Michigan law school graduates showed that the \"high-earning practitioners in large private practices report the lowest average job satisfaction.\"\n\nWhat accounts for this? One theory is that relentlessly profit-driven firms may not pay much attention to the personal satisfaction of their lawyers. Focus on the bottom line might lead to neglect of relationship building or other well-established sources of worker happiness. A second theory is that the cases that yield the highest levels of firm income provide less satisfying work than less lucrative cases. Whatever the explanation, an increase in firms' profits will not provide a trickle-down of happiness.\n\n##### _Associate Compensation_\n\nFirms today typically compensate lawyers in one of two basic ways: lockstep (a ladder system with a base salary for each rung of the ladder, tweaked according to various performance measures) or some variation of a merit system, usually with an \"eat what you kill\" component (rewards tied in some way to the business the individual lawyer brings in). Law firms often employ a bonus system, in which year-end bonuses are handed out to star performers (winners) without explicitly identifying less able performers (losers). If your law firm's primary objective is to make the _least_ number of associates _unhappy_ , you would do well to adopt lockstep compensation systems. However, the unhappiest associates under such a system might well be your hardest workers, and firms usually want to encourage productivity and reward excellent performance.\n\nCompensation systems, which may seem dissimilar on the surface, actually share common features. Almost all compensation models consider some measure of status within the firm. Even most lockstep systems are not really lockstep, because firms find ways to compensate exceptional work or use wage incentives to keep people from leaving: rainmakers and rock stars are rewarded. Once those negotiable components enter the system, the differences between systems tend to dissipate.\n\n##### _Partner Compensation_\n\nThe two primary factors in partner compensation are business origination and fees collected, although many firms have a formula or plan that also considers client and case responsibilities, contributions to management of the firm, pro bono work, and professional involvement enhancing the firm's reputation. Some formulas try to encompass ineffable qualities such as collegiality and cooperativeness. Other formulas incorporate measures of client satisfaction, skills, and contributions to the firm beyond simply the book of business and revenue production. Firms typically reserve some revenue for a bonus pool that can be divided pro rata or used to reward exceptional performance.\n\nThe recession has prompted some reconsideration of partner pay strategies. Because associates cost firms money, many of the larger firms are decreasing their associate numbers. Partners are hoarding work, and compensation compression is occurring, with incoming partners' compensation approaching that of more senior partners. These factors may reintroduce rigidity, bean (and hour) counting, and competitiveness in partner relations, all of which steer away from job satisfaction. Compression will probably prompt people to engage in more salary comparisons. A central finding of happiness research is that people care about their standing or status in a social group\u2014and law firms are no exception\u2014so relative income matters much more than absolute income to life satisfaction. Judge Patrick Schiltz tells the story of one lawyer who earned more than one million dollars a year who \"came within a whisker of quitting his firm\" when he learned that an income peer would received $10,000 more than he did as part of a year-end bonus.\n\n##### _Do Some Compensation Systems Make Lawyers Happier Than Other Systems?_\n\nNo study definitively proves one compensation system is superior to others in increasing lawyer satisfaction levels. Every compensation system will leave some lawyers in a firm unhappy. If relationships are key to life satisfaction, however, formulas that capture important contributions to firm life are more likely to promote a happier workplace. The ideal compensation system measures in some way an employee's overall contribution to the firm's well-being, satisfies the firm's key workers, is generally perceived to be fair, and is clearly explained up front to new members of the organization. The rub lies in the difficulty of measuring an employee's contribution to a firm's overall well-being. Based on happiness research, we know these contributions can come in many forms, including by supporting other employees, treating co-workers fairly, facilitating a transfer of more control to co-workers, and especially promoting trust within the office. Noted British economist John Helliwell's research indicates that \"among employed people, trust in management predicts life satisfaction more reliably than health, marital status, or income level.\"\n\n##### _Retention_\n\nFirms make a mistake when they place too much reliance on compensation to keep lawyers on board. Firms think that salaries matter so much to people that they can buy off a little unhappiness on the job by paying attorneys more. It works for a while. People overestimate how much happiness money will bring them. Over a relatively short time though, the happiness boost dissipates. \"[T]he effect of an income increase after four years is only about 42% of the effect after one year: the majority of the short-term effect of income vanishes over time.\" The hedonic treadmill begins to roll\u2014as one earns a greater salary, expectations rise and people adapt to the higher income level. Both associates and partners clamor for something more than money: they want a better lifestyle, more communications from their firm, autonomy, fairness, trust, and to feel valued.\n\nRaising salaries is not the best retention lure. In exit interviews, associates mention numerous reasons for leaving firms. Although partners often speculate that money is a primary reason, that is not borne out by surveys of associates. The most common three reasons associates cite for leaving firms are 1) an absence of mentoring, training and development, whether formal or informal; 2) a lack of or problematic relationships with partners; and 3) workload demands and a need for better work-life balance. Similarly, in a survey of more than one thousand lateral partners sponsored by _American Lawyer_ , respondents said that anticipated compensation with their new firms was one of the _least_ significant factors in their move. The most important reasons were their new firms' commitment to support or help expand their particular practice and the firms' ability to integrate them into the partnership. Understanding that money is not the answer to their retention problems, some larger firms are investing in programs that are intended to \"re-recruit\" their mid-level associates. In Washington, D.C., Howrey offers five academies for associate development each year. The firm has also created a mentorship program that gives each associate an individual partner-mentor and trains the partners in leadership and coaching. While rapport that evolves naturally might be more genuine, the firm is paying attention to key sources of satisfaction.\n\nThe main point here for managers is that, beyond certain base levels, relative income matters more to workers than actual income. A compensation system that promotes overall happiness should be perceived to be fair by as many of the valuable workers as possible. One way to create the fairness, even though it exposes the relative salary differentials, is by constructing a transparent compensation system.\n\n##### _Transparency_\n\nPeople's satisfaction with a job will be lower if they expect better rewards than they actually receive. If expectations are key in determining satisfaction with compensation, keeping a close match between expectations and results minimizes feelings of dissatisfaction.\n\nConsider the experiences of one large firm that revised its compensation and professional development practices. In 2001, the firm moved from a traditional lockstep system of pay and promotion to a level system of specifying competencies in seventeen areas, evaluating associates twice a year against these expectations, and adjusting compensation and associates' billing rates in accordance with those assessments. Compensation, including bonuses, became individualized and tied to growth in competency areas. The partner in charge of recruiting and career development for the firm says one of the most difficult implementation features was getting his partners to ignore time served: \"It is stunningly difficult for lawyers to let go of that because it is so deeply ingrained.\" Another feature of the plan is an upward evaluation of partners by associates in categories of supervision, availability, respect for associate workload, offering a broad perspective on cases, providing adequate lead time to complete projects, openness to questions, constructive feedback, and career guidance. The competency-based compensation system thus does something that firms increasingly see as important: it assesses the mentorship performance of partners and rewards partners who are good mentors and managers. Although attributing causation is impossible, the firm has noticed a marked drop in associate attrition under the competencies system. In 2001, the associate attrition rate was 26 percent (32 percent for female attorneys); by 2006, the associate attrition rate was 11 percent (10 percent for female attorneys).\n\nTransparency about the criteria used to evaluate performance and clear expectations seem to be two of the most important characteristics of a fair compensation plan. There is more than one good way to run a law firm. The important thing is to have a compensation scheme that is transparent so that people who are coming to the firm are those who would like whatever system the firm uses. Transparency lets people who have different objectives make a reasoned decision whether the firm fits their goals.\n\n#### 6. PROMOTING SOCIAL INTERACTION\n\n##### _Avoiding the Perils of Bigness_\n\n_The prevailing model of the large law firm is so shaky at this point that one of the things firms are going to have to do is rethink their basic organizational model and how they use their human resources.... We're in a moment where the large law firm model is under tremendous pressure and we're going to see whether people who organize the new models will take this into account and be more concerned about getting the maximum productivity and creativity out of their employees_.\n\nSomething important is lost as organizations grow past a certain size. In his book _The Tipping Point_ , Malcolm Gladwell makes the case that firms of over about 150 members lack the cohesiveness and collegiality to be a satisfying workplace\u2014and generally become significantly less efficient at accomplishing their goals.\n\nDrawing on the research of British anthropologist Robin Dunbar and others, Gladwell argues that once firms exceed about 150 members people cannot know their co-workers well enough that \"what they think of you matters\" and work becomes \"a very different kind of experience.\" Dunbar's research led him to conclude that the \" 'figure of 150 seems to represent the maximum number of individuals with whom we can have a genuinely social relationship, the kind of relationship that goes with knowing who they are and how they relate to us.' \" Up to a size of 150 or so, an organization can attain its goals informally, whereas larger firms are forced to rely on rules, regulations, and imposed hierarchies \"to command loyalty and cohesion.\" Firms of fewer than 150 members can have a sense of unity that comes from everyone knowing who to turn to for help in problem-solving. Each member knows what every other member brings to the table in terms of specialized knowledge\u2014and they can all feel comfortable approaching each other for assistance. Gladwell compares the well-run firm of fewer than 150 members to the family in its \"re-creation, on an organization-wide level, of the kind of intimacy and trust that exists in a family.\"\n\nWhat \"The Rule of 150\" suggests for law firms is that they should carefully weigh the social costs of expanding beyond that size. Most firms are highly unlikely to remake themselves into smaller firms, but Gladwell's point is to give consideration to other options once a firm approaches the 150 lawyer size: cap the firm size at 150, divide the firm into separate operations with distinct practice areas and distinct clients, or establish a satellite or branch office in a nearby city. While each of these options might, in certain cases, seem unrealistic, Gladwell suggests there will be significant costs to not taking one or the other step. Most large firms divide into separate practice groups for substantive areas. Being in a practice group helps, but doesn't really give you the _Cheers_ benefit of working in a place where everybody knows your name. Gladwell notes that strict adherence to the Rule of 150 has been the key to the much-admired success of Gore Associates, the firm that manufactures a wide variety of articles ranging from Gore-Tex fabric to Glide dental floss to hospital equipment. He quotes founder Wilbert Gore who reports, \"We found again and again that things get clumsy at a hundred and fifty.\"\n\nHaving warned that the road to happiness might be harder at a behemoth firm, we should observe that not all lawyers at giant firms are unhappy. Many enjoy the type of work most likely found at larger firms: the intellectual challenge of particular kinds of cases\u2014such as corporate restructurings, class actions, complex commercial litigation, or transnational work\u2014as well as the benefits of a variety of practice areas, the economic strengths of diversified practice areas, the competitive advantages of size and resources (cutting edge technology and the ability to deploy attorneys into public service projects), the caliber of clients, and the prestige of the firm.\n\nLarge firms themselves are changing form. One of the net effects of the recession of 2009 may be some dismantling\u2014or rearchitecting\u2014of giant firms. Douglas McCollam, a critic of large firm practice, offered this stark assessment:\n\nAt bottom, what's in question is the whole economic edifice of the modern American law firm. Like the pharaohs of old, big firms are enamored of constructing pyramids with an ever-widening base of associates and nonequity partners toiling on behalf of a narrowing band of equity partners at the top. Increasing a firm's \"leverage\"\u2014as expressed through the billable hour, one of the most pernicious creations in the annals of commerce\u2014has been the key metric driving profitability at big law firms over the last generation. Numerous studies have documented the deleterious impact this model has had upon the legal profession and clients. To date, nothing has been able to kill it. It would be ironic indeed if the economic downturn that has cost lawyers so much ended up being the very thing that saved the legal profession from its own excess.\n\n##### _Mentoring_\n\nHeading virtually any survey of associate dissatisfactions is a lack of mentoring. In one study, 43 percent of associates indicated that their supervising partners did not provide the mentorship the associates needed and wanted. One of the largest national studies on associate attrition found that the availability or lack of mentoring and feedback frequently affected associates' decisions to stay with their firms or to leave them. In a study of University Virginia law graduates, the aspect of the job setting with which men and women were the least satisfied was performance evaluation\u2014and that could encompass the absence of evaluation, the quality of the evaluation that was given, or that the evaluation itself was negative. People appreciate feedback that is phrased positively and gives a clear sense of expectations.\n\nMentoring can create profound social connections\u2014and in numerous studies of helping behaviors, both benefactors and recipients show elevated levels of happiness from acts of kindness, counseling, and other supportive activities. Professor Sonja Lyubomirsky says that this is more than just a \"helper's high\"; assisting other people \"can satisfy a basic human need for connecting with others, winning you smiles, thankfulness, and valued friendship.\"\n\nThose law firms rated among the nation's best are heralded for the training they provide. For example, the survey resulting in the fifty Best Law Firms for Women list found that \"68 percent offer mentoring for senior female associates and 62 percent offer management training for women attorneys.\"\n\n##### _Show Them the Love_\n\n_What people seek from others, more than anything else, is attention and appreciation._\n\nBeyond monetary valuation, in what ways can your law firm emphasize the importance of people as individuals? The various surveys of best companies and law firms\u2014from Catalyst, Vault, and _Working Mother_ \u2014show a number of common features in firms' treatment of their employees that lead to satisfaction. Favored firms promote their employees' dreams and encourage innovation and risk-taking; they value their employee's opinions, listen to their ideas, and implement their suggestions. They give feedback and promote the social network at work. It is unsurprising that employees who think their company values workers as individuals report greater job satisfaction and organizational commitment than those who don't. Similarly, employees whose values match those of their colleagues are also more satisfied and committed to stay. Successful law firms seem to have some sense of shared values or mission. Attorneys who are emotionally attached to their firms are the least likely to leave. On the other hand, \"[w]hen individual practices merely exist under the same roof, internal competition, hoarding of work, jealousy and suspicion develop.\"\n\nTo address a high level of associate attrition, Sullivan & Cromwell in 2006 held a training session for its partners on associate appreciation. This presentation encouraged partners to give associates feedback, to say \"thank you, and \"good job,\" and to [r]eturn associates' phone calls as quickly as you would a partner's or client's.\" The firm also arranged periodic associate lunches with the chairman of the firm and implemented a 360-degree review process\u2014to give associates feedback from subordinates and peers as well as supervisors. In 2007, the firm's attrition rate dropped from 30-plus percent to 22 percent.\n\nOf course, all of these activities cost money. We are not suggesting endless feedback or parades of perks, but a balance. One thing to weigh in that balance is the costs, both economic and human, of attorney attrition. Another concern to weigh in your balancing is that an unhappy attorney is unlikely to be a good ambassador for your firm.\n\n#### 7. GIVING THE PRO BONO BONUS\n\n_It is one of the most beautiful compensations of this life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself._\n\n\u2014Ralph Waldo Emerson\n\nThe opportunity to do pro bono work is tied to greater job satisfaction for lawyers. Happily, the concept that people who have a sense of civic engagement are more satisfied dovetails with pro bono obligations in law. A recent ABA survey reported that only 46 percent of surveyed lawyers met the ABA's goal of offering \"50 hours of free pro bono services\" each year. Those who do provide pro bono legal services report a direct correlation between that form of giving back and their own satisfaction. Pro bono activities boost attorney morale.\n\nThe converse is also true: new lawyers identify the absence of pro bono opportunities as one of their largest areas of dissatisfaction with the practice of law. The ability to do pro bono work suffers from a lack of support from many firms and already-oppressive billable hour requirements.\n\nSome things are changing in the public interest world. Law firms are beginning to see pro bono opportunities as good business, a method to help recruit talented law school graduates, valuable training ground for associates, and a way to engage with communities. Esther F. Lardent, president of the Pro Bono Institute at Georgetown University Law Center, says, \"The nation's 150 largest law firms last year spent 4 million hours on pro bono, more than double what it was 10 years ago.\" Gradually, larger firms are appointing directors of pro bono activities, although many cut back on their pro bono activities during the recent recession.\n\nAttorneys gain a tremendous sense of personal meaning from representing people who are vulnerable and achieving some measure of justice for them\u2014for making a difference in people's lives.\n\nThe range of possible pro bono possibilities is vast: representing detainees at Guantanamo Bay, death row inmates, or hurricane victims denied financial assistance; helping veterans obtain disability benefits; assisting with the legal needs of low income immigrants; or filing adoptions. Conservative or libertarian public interest lawyers promote the constitutional rights of crime victims, campaign against eminent domain and affirmative action, and defend individual economic liberties and property rights.\n\nLawyers can pursue the intersection of their hobbies or interests and law. For instance, lawyers interested in animal protection and animal rights have given time to the Humane Society and the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. One lawyer has successfully challenged black bear hunts; another has saved condemned dogs from execution (when the \"client,\" a Rottweiler named Pookie, bit a child who stuck her foot through his fence). Call it \"pro bone\" representation.\n\n#### 8. CREATING A PLAYFUL WORKPLACE\n\nLaw firms can look for inspiration from trendsetters in other industries. Law firms are behind the curve when it comes to creating workplaces where a sense of play is encouraged. Consider the workplace strategies and incentives of Google, rated the single best place to work in this country in both 2007 and 2008, according to a _Fortune_ survey of more than 100,000 employees. While the compensation was top-notch (Google ranked 25th on the separate top-paying companies list in 2008), it was the attention to individuals, benefits, feel, and playfulness that rocketed Google to the number one spot on the best companies to work for list. Ninety-nine percent of employees receive stock options, and all of them can eat \"free breakfast, lunch, and dinner at 17 gourmet cafes, [and receive] a subsidy for buying a fuel-efficient car and free shuttle service to and from work.\" Part of the job satisfaction for Google employees may come from finding a workplace that prioritizes shared values, such as prizing tech wizardry, giving economic benefits for ecological acts, or sponsoring playfulness. Google's office in Zurich, for example, offers playrooms with pool tables and a huge slide from an upper floor into the lunchroom. Apart from all of the perks, employees gave Google the highest ratings for open communications, trust along various dimensions of respecting employees (such as caring for them as individuals and collaboration on relevant decisions), and camaraderie\u2014a sense of family or team spirit about the workplace.\n\nGoogle and other Silicon Valley firms are far ahead of anything most law firms have done to create a playful atmosphere at work. The exception may be boutique corporate defense firm Bartlit Beck in Chicago, which has a full-size mock courtroom in its offices and a basketball court in the middle of the firm\u2014with courtside offices for several of the partners. Its Denver office has a rock climbing wall in the lobby. Most law firms though have tended to be conservative, perhaps in part because of their image, but they are lagging dramatically in the workplace revolution. The new generation of workers in America places a much higher premium on play and creativity; allowing for these expressions can pay off in terms of revenue as well as morale.\n\nOf course, law firms are rarely all work and no play. Your firm may be one that knows the value of having partners, associates, and staff engage in recreation together. Some firms make use of firm-purchased luxury boxes at concerts and sporting events, offer wine tastings and cooking classes, or sponsor firm-wide trivia contests.\n\nPillsbury Winthrop Shaw Pittman, LLP, with fourteen offices and eight hundred lawyers, was one of only four law firms to earn a spot on _Working Mother's_ 100 Best Companies list. In addition to family-friendly flexible schedules and leave policies, the firm boasts an impressive roster of social events to help create personal relationships among its employees such as the following:\n\n\u2022 In May the firm's Washington, D.C., office arranged a private screening of Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End for attorneys, staff, and their families. All enjoyed pre-show appetizers in Pillsbury's first-floor conference rooms, which had been turned into pirate-themed hangouts complete with servers in costume.\n\n\u2022 In July the firm's McLean, Virginia, office staged a \"Smooth Operator Challenge,\" during which attorneys made their favorite nonalcoholic smoothies as part of a friendly competition. Employees were encouraged to \"buy\" a full-size smoothie for $5, which benefited the Medical Care for Children Partnership. The firm matched every dollar raised for the charity.\n\n\u2022 Each office also holds an annual \"Family Fun Day\" at a popular amusement park or other fun venue.\n\nAt this point, the evidence is anecdotal and it sifts through mostly in stories about firm recreational events, but it seems that firms that play together stay together.\n\n#### 9. DESIGNING LAW OFFICES TO PROMOTE LAWYER HAPPINESS\n\n_Beauty is... the promise of happiness._\n\n\u2014Krister Stendahl\n\nChanging the physical design of a law office is a neglected tool in the search for greater lawyer happiness. Anyone who has ever spent much time in windowless cubicles or drab hotel rooms understands that interior spaces can affect moods. Some spaces rob us of optimism and a sense of purpose; other spaces make us happy and productive. Buildings can seem welcoming or forbidding, tranquil or exciting, harmonious or chaotic. A space that suits us just right at one time might not at another time.\n\nAlain De Botton, author of _The Architecture of Happiness_ , explains that buildings \"speak of visions of happiness.\" Not everyone shares the same vision of happiness, of course, so it is not surprising that two well-designed and happiness-promoting buildings might look very different from each other. One building might have an aristocratic feel while another seems more democratic. Anticipation of the future might be expressed in one building, while another communicates a fondness for the past. Nonetheless, there is growing agreement that certain design features tend to be associated with an increased sense of well-being in those who occupy the buildings fortunate enough to have them.\n\nDuring the last several decades, the architectural community has become increasingly focused on the ways people interact with architecture. Christopher Alexander and his colleagues at the Center for Environmental Structure published, in 1977, a groundbreaking book called _A Pattern Language_ , which identified and described 253 \"patterns,\" or design features, of towns, communities, and buildings that tend to promote individual well-being and smoothly functioning communities. A dozen or more of these 253 patterns are especially relevant to law office design and will be discussed below. The Academy of Neuroscience for Architecture, an organization founded in 2003, released data that supports our intuitions that natural light and natural air stimulate creativity at work. California architect Deborah Richmond agrees, arguing for \"a democratic distribution of natural light and air, which is proven to increase productivity and reduce sick days.\" The Academy of Neuroscience for Architecture has also published data showing that views of nature calm us and that low ceilings promote fine attention to detail while high ceilings facilitate more expansive thinking.\n\nSo what does the happy law office look like? To some extent, the answer depends on the personalities of the lawyers who occupy it (one person's thing of beauty is another person's bad and ugly), but architects and \"environmental psychologists\" are in general agreement that certain design features stand a good chance of making the smiles come easier.\n\nAmong the top recommendations is to rely as much as possible on natural light for illumination in every occupied office space. All the better if the natural light comes into the room from two sides. (There's a reason, other than prestige, why those corner offices are so sought after.) As Alexander notes, \"When they have a choice, people will always gravitate to those rooms which have light on two sides, and leave the rooms which are lit only from one side unused and empty.\" According to Alexander, \"this pattern, more than any other single pattern, determines the success or failure of a room.\" This insight is hardly new, as \"light on two sides\" was a tenet of the old Beaux Arts design tradition. Alexander argues that rooms lit on two sides create a desirable social atmosphere because they have less glare and less disturbing light-dark contrast around the windows. The light distribution in a room lit on two or more sides allows occupants to better read the facial reactions of others in the room. In short, Alexander claims, \"light on two sides allows people to understand each other\"\u2014and understanding other people makes us happy.\n\nThere are compelling reasons to avoid the traditional model of one enclosed office per attorney, spread along a stretch of hallway. Closed-off offices discourage interaction. On the other hand, offices that are too exposed feel uncomfortable. Ideally, offices should strike a balance between enclosure and exposure. This can be accomplished in a variety of ways, many of which have the added benefit of increasing flexibility. If work areas or offices are too small, claustrophobia can be a problem: studies show that spaces less than sixty square feet in area make people feel cramped.\n\nIf a law office includes, as most do, separate offices for each lawyer, then each office should have a view overlooking life. Alexander contends, \"Rooms without a view are prisons for people who have to stay in them.\" Worse yet, they might be bad for your health. A study of hospital patients showed that patients with rooms overlooking trees had shorter hospital stays and fewer post-stay medical complaints than those with rooms overlooking brick walls. The better the view, the freer one feels. A lawyer who can gaze out at a garden or pleasant street scene will be happier than one who looks out at a bulky air conditioner unit, the top of a parking garage, or an overgrown vacant lot. Obviously, not every law office can be located next to a botanical garden or an idyllic street, but in selecting a potential new office location, attention should be paid to the views it affords on all occupied sides. If staying put is the only viable option, well placed mirrors can sometimes be employed to create improved office views. You probably can't get the parking garage next door to move, but maybe you can peek around it.\n\nLaw firms, understandably, impose some limits on what individual lawyers can do with their own office space. _Playboy_ pin-ups, black velvet Elvises, or lava lamps send messages to clients that many firms would prefer not be sent. But allowing attorneys to fill their offices with meaningful things from their own lives (not items chosen just to impress visitors) gives them a greater sense of control, an important component of a happy life. Moreover, a room that reflects the history and tastes of the occupant facilitates connections with those who might come to visit. (\"Oh, I see you like to collect comic books\u2014I loved Superman as a kid too.\") Your office should tell your story. Unfortunately, as Alexander laments, too many are driven to \"the artificial scene-making of 'modern d\u00dfcor'\" that is \"totally bankrupt.\"\n\nA law office designed to promote happiness should include a large, comfortable space for lawyers to gather together and socialize. Major pathways in the office should be tangent to this area. This plan brings lawyers close to the socializing space on a regular basis and, as an added benefit, eliminates the long sterile corridors that dampen spirits. A well-designed gathering place would include a variety of welcoming things, such as a fireplace, coffee pot, a variety of comfortable chairs, and newspapers. Lamps rather than uniform illumination should be used, as studies show people seek out pools of light even when overall illumination is adequate elsewhere. Warm colored light, produced by wall paint, natural wood, or light sources, should permeate the space.\n\nEvery law office should provide a place for communal eating. Thomas Merton, author of _The Living Bread_ , writes, \"The mere act of eating together. . . is by its very nature a sign of friendship and 'communion.'\" Just as the table can become the center of family life, it can bring office colleagues together through shared food, drink, stories, and laughter. Communal eating spaces in a large firm can serve another function: they allow lawyers to meet and find colleagues who have mutual affinities that they might otherwise never get to know. In the well-designed eating space, lights directly over tables serve to focus attention on the communal activity and help bind groups.\n\nLarge undifferentiated spaces are not comfortable places for groups of lawyers to work. According to one large study of office workers, large spaces make workers \"feel unimportant\" and give the \"uncomfortable feeling of being watched all the time.\" For a legal team to do its best work\u2014and be happiest\u2014it needs a smaller work area or meeting room, preferably one that provides partial views out into a larger common area.\n\nOur affinity for certain features, such as natural plants and moving water, may trace back to our origins as a species. Plants of varying shapes and sizes should be scattered throughout the office. Moving water, most likely produced by a fountain, is associated with an increased sense of well-being and should be featured in a place where as many lawyers as possible might benefit from it.\n\nWhen it comes to law office design, there are indications that some firms are moving in the right direction. Firms are \"adding more communal spaces, from coffee bars to visitor lounges.\" San Francisco-based architect Barbara Gunn says law firms are \"looking for opportunities to encourage collegiality and chance encounters\" between lawyers. A New York lawyer overseeing the remodeling of his firm's offices agrees, saying that the goal is not \"to impress clients,\" but to create \"a work environment that really encourages and supports building collegiality and communication and teamwork.\" The new look in law firm architecture is a trend toward the building of \"teaming rooms where people from different practice groups can work together.\"\n\nIt is unrealistic to expect any office to offer all of the happiness-promoting design features described above, but the more that are part of the office landscape, the happier the lawyers who work (and sometimes play) in it are likely to be.\n\n#### 10. ASKING FOR FEEDBACK\n\nKeep in mind that mattering matters to people. People like feedback from their firm; they also like to be asked what they think about their working conditions.\n\nWhy not conduct an anonymous survey of your lawyers and staff to assess the dimensions of their job satisfaction? Using a survey questionnaire and scale of agreement (ranging from \"strongly agree\" to \"strongly disagree\"), you can ask whether your employees are satisfied with such measures as communication, feedback, training, mentoring, expected hours, ability to maintain a reasonable balance between work and personal life, collegiality, the physical structure of the workplace, and compensation. Assure anonymity, and add an open-ended area for comments on things that would enhance their satisfaction with the firm, the best aspects of working for the firm, and what bothers them the most. Merely asking for opinions provides a happiness boost.\n\n#### IS YOUR LAW FIRM A HAPPY PLACE?\n\nThis list is not intended as a one-size-fits-all checklist. The purpose of the enumerated questions is to translate those characteristics the happiness literature identifies as correlating with job satisfaction into pragmatic advice for law firm managers.\n\n1. In what ways do you tell valued players what they mean to the firm and that the firm wants them to be happy? Are all attorneys given rewards, recognition, emotional support, and encouragement to take risks and pursue dreams? What opportunities do you provide for career advancement? Do partners relay to associates good things clients say about them, and do they remember to give associates credit for the heavy lifting in front of clients? Are all attorneys trained in how to respect and work with staff?\n\n2. Does your work assignment system allow attorneys any flexibility to choose the projects or cases on which they would like to work? Are more junior attorneys given responsibility to manage cases independently? Are they given training in how to manage cases and develop business? Do partners frequently take associates with them to meet with clients? Do they routinely take associates out for social occasions?\n\n3. What proactive efforts does the firm take toward creating flexible schedules and compensation plans for attorneys and staff? Is your compensation structure transparent, and are new hires informed about it? What percent of your employees actually take advantage of flex- or part-time policies? Do you have policies offering generous maternity and paternity leave?\n\n4. Do you have a mentoring program for more junior associates that matches mentors and mentees based on the associates' developmental needs and allows participants to designate mentor characteristics they would prefer (such as practice area, gender, or family status) or select their own mentors? Does the program provide training for mentors that stresses understanding each associate's individual goals, creating a career roadmap, and promoting career development? Is an evaluation mechanism in place for associates to give confidential upward feedback on the quality of the mentoring they have been receiving? Is mentoring valued enough to factor into partner or senior associate compensation? Is the mentor also a guardian who can help resolve unreasonable conflicting demands on associates or run interference for them?\n\n5. Do attorney performance appraisals include benchmarks for skills and knowledge expected of associates? Are the criteria communicated so associates understand the expectations? Does the firm offer strategies for working on identified weaknesses? Does the firm provide regular and constructive feedback?\n\n6. To avoid surprises that make people feel insecure (\"Before you hear this from someone else . . .\"), does your firm have an established policy for the release of information about firm events and plans? Or do you rely on information leaking out and trickling down?\n\n7. Does your firm have regular opportunities to socialize (wine and cheese on the last Friday of the month, a co-ed softball game, or a group charitable project)? How often do your attorneys get together for lunch? What ties does your firm have to the community?\n\n8. Does the physical layout of your offices promote interaction and opportunities for the exchange of ideas? Does your firm offer places where attorneys can congregate and talk? Are you tolerant of water cooler time\u2014downtime where attorneys can share insights?\n\n9. Do you pay attention to indicators of attorney and staff satisfaction? What are your attrition rates for lawyers and staff at various levels? Are all attorneys, including those on alternate career paths, and staff asked about how firm policies affect their work? Are they asked for their ideas and input on innovations, efficiency, and firm practices?\n\n## **CHAPTER 7\n\nLawyers' Stories**\n\nTHE BEST WAY TO PREDICT WHAT EXPERIENCES WILL make us happy, or unhappy, is to look at how other people have reacted to those experiences. We think we are unique\u2014and, yes, we are\u2014but people are far more alike than they are different, and the reactions of others who have gone before us turn out to be the very best guide to our own possible futures. When we let our own imaginations, rather than the reports of others, predict our reactions to future experiences, we tend to miss the mark rather badly. There are many reasons why our imaginations fail us but chief among them are that we let our present attitudes and interests overly color our imagined futures, and we fail to appreciate how rapidly we adapt to both good and bad events.\n\nDaniel Gilbert says it is better that we rely on even \"a single randomly selected individual\" than our own imaginations when it comes to predicting how we will experience the future. Gilbert's suggestion is certainly open to a validity critique: \"Of course, relying on a sample of one is probably not going to tell you too much, especially when the sample is intrinsically biased. (Instead of talking to a yodeler, why not talk to someone who dropped out of yodeling class?)\" A better method of collecting information about career satisfaction in law\u2014better than relying on your own imagination or selecting the single yodeler\u2014is to talk to a variety of people in the profession.\n\nIn this chapter, we invite you to let other lawyers be your guide. In their stories they will warn you of missteps they have taken, identify the peaks and valleys of their experiences as lawyers, and point to various paths that lead in the direction of satisfying careers in law. We offer stories from happy lawyers, unhappy lawyers, and lawyers whose career satisfaction falls somewhere in between. Finally, we provide a few thoughts of our own on what these stories, and many others we haven't room to include, tell us about the pluses and minuses of practicing law and what you might expect as your career arcs from law school to retirement.\n\n### ABOUT BALANCING WORK AND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE\n\nWhen we asked hundreds of lawyers, in nearly every state and in a wide variety of practice areas, to identify what they've found in their careers to be the biggest obstacle to personal happiness, they most frequently cited their difficulty in achieving a satisfactory balance between the demands of their career and their other personal goals and responsibilities. \"The law is a jealous mistress and requires a long and constant courtship,\" noted U.S. Supreme Court Justice Joseph Story in 1829. Justice Story's observation seems as true today as it did nearly two centuries ago. Lawyers continue to make personal sacrifices to further their legal careers, but they are often not very happy about it.\n\nA typical complaint comes from an Atlanta attorney who says she \"felt a great deal of pressure to work longer rather than smarter\" and found that career satisfaction sank \"in an environment that rewarded people for the number of hours they spent away from their families.\" A Kansas City attorney says, \"It is very easy to get in a job and then find yourself looking around one day wondering where the last five years and all your friends went.\" A California attorney reports she is \"frustrated by the lack of time to develop my personal life\u2014to make new friends, to find a romantic partner, and to be my best self physically.\" \"There are only 24 hours in day,\" a hard-working New York tax attorney writes, \"so I can't do a lot of things that I would otherwise do, and that's tough.\" Another New York City lawyer notes that it is not just the long hours of practice that are tough but also the anxiety associated with always being on call: \"Having to stay in the office all night to review and comment on an unexpected series of documents sent from lawyers on the other side of a transaction was certainly not ideal, but the nights when I left at 5 or 6 and spent the evening worrying that I had left too early because something unexpected might arise were probably even worse.\" An Illinois attorney who is in-house counsel for a large corporation agrees, writing, \"It is difficult to completely separate myself from my job. Too many people and the success of my company depend upon me and my colleagues.\"\n\nThe large firm focus on billable hours is a source of much lawyer unhappiness, in part because it seemingly de-emphasizes work quality in favor of work quantity. A Missouri lawyer who \"takes pride in being efficient and cost-effective\" finds billable hours to be a source of frustration: \"I am being punished for being efficient, a perverse consequence of hourly billing,\" and, as a result, \"lose time with family and friends.\" Another attorney complains, \"At the end of the day, it seems my only value to the firm is based on billable hours.\" A California attorney finds that basing value on billable hours breeds resentment by associates against other associates who fail to work the same unreasonably long hours that they do. She quotes a colleague who once told her, \"All the galley slaves need to row at the same pace.\"\n\nThe long hours associated with law firm practice are especially tough on attorneys who have children. A marketing consultant for law firms puts it this way: \"'The law firm is probably the most family unfriendly place you can go... It's difficult to recruit women because they feel that somewhere down the line, they are going to have to choose between having a family and having a job, which is not a fair choice.'\" One attorney and mom tells this story about her difficulties in balancing work life and family life:\n\nIt was a Friday afternoon and my three-year-old son had a preschool Mother's Day program.... After the program, I checked my voicemail and was treated to a rant [from a partner for whom I worked] including curse words I hadn't heard before on how I was needed that afternoon, how my priorities were screwed up, and how I had left him in a lurch. I returned with my son to the office to find that some discovery had been hand-delivered and I wasn't there for him to give it to. Discovery! We had thirty days to respond to it! The real problem was that he was going on a canoe trip the next Monday for a week and wanted me to work on it before he left. As I left his office, I heard him yell at his secretary while I was in earshot that the firm needed to stop hiring mothers. The kicker is that this attorney had been appointed by the bar association to serve on a committee to improve the status of women in the profession.\n\nWhat can be done to restore a better balance between work and personal life? One approach is to change jobs. A lawyer who, as a litigator, found himself \"consistently at the mercy of deadlines\" decided he \"needed a change because of the demands of the job.\" His new position as a compliance officer for the athletics department at the University of Oklahoma has more regular work hours. Another lawyer (and mother) reports that her move from a large private firm to a three-day-per-week in-house counsel job restored the connections she needed to have with her young family. A lawyer who left private practice for a position with the federal public defender's office appreciates that as a federal employee, his number of vacation days increases each year and that he has a newfound flexibility for scheduling his dream trips.\n\nShort of changing jobs, lawyers offer other advice for achieving a better work-life balance. An attorney in a large private firm finds more hours for personal life this way:\n\nTrain clients not to call you at the last minute or on your cell phone unless it is an emergency. Don't schedule conference calls at lunch time. Don't schedule plane flights at 6:00 A.M. Take time to go to your kid's events, but take turns with your spouse. Go home in time to have dinner with your family regardless of the looks you get from your partners. Be happy with your compensation, regardless of others who are making more because they have different priorities than you do.\n\nAn attorney in a small town in the Midwest adds this: \"Know when to go home. And don't be a lawyer when you are with your family.\"\n\nSome lucky lawyers are able to find an appropriate work-play balance even within the confines of their law firm. One happy lawyer in a small workers' compensation firm enjoys his office foosball table, dartboard, and bar, where firm members gather regularly after work to toast the day and discuss sports, music, and other things on their minds. Because clients rarely meet at the law firm, he comes in jeans and regularly tosses a Frisbee around the office with his partner.\n\nAnother solo practitioner in Virginia echoes this concept of playfulness:\n\nI would tell students not to be afraid to try unusual places or ways in which to practice law. I would never have pictured myself as a solo practitioner in a poor area of rural Virginia, but overall I am extremely satisfied in life and practice here.... I can raise show dogs, go to my office in shorts, and still face exciting challenges and intellectual stimulation in my practice.\n\nSome firms help lawyers achieve a better work-life balance by adopting flexible work policies or by allowing lawyers to bring family members to the office. For example, a senior in-house counsel for a national association praises her organization's policy that offers a compressed schedule option. Attorneys in her company are able to take one paid day off for every two weeks so that they work eighty hours in nine days instead of ten. The lawyer is also grateful for the association's infants-in-the-workplace program that allows mothers and fathers to bring their infants with them to work until the children reach six months of age. The baby stays with the parent while the parent is working in the office, and there are two or three designated individuals who can stay with the baby when the parent needs to be away.\n\n### ABOUT WORKING WITH PEOPLE YOU LIKE AND TRUST\n\nWhen asked what about their job makes them most happy, lawyers often come up with the same answer: people. Lawyers who regularly interact with colleagues and clients that they like and trust tend to report high levels of career satisfaction. On the other hand, those who must frequently deal with ungrateful clients, unsympathetic supervisors, or unethical and unscrupulous opposing attorneys tend to be much less happy.\n\nA number of lawyers surveyed identify good relationships as their greatest source of happiness. \"Surround yourself with people you enjoy working with and make work fun,\" advises the managing partner of a small plaintiff's personal injury firm. This sentiment is echoed by the chair of a practice area at one of the country's largest law firms, who suggests, \"Learn to relate to your clients and colleagues as people\u2014you will not have much time for friends outside your practice and it is a blessing to have colleagues and clients who are friends.\"\n\nAn equally large number of lawyers see bad relationships as the cause of great career dissatisfaction. One managing partner who has practiced for more than twenty-five years complains about \"the lack of civility\" in the profession and the \"demoralizing\" willingness of some lawyers to compromise the truth in their \"incessant quest for money.\" Another lawyer from the Midwest believes, \"I have probably cut my life short by a matter of months stressing over unethical litigation tactics that certain adversarial attorneys have used against me and my clients.\" A Los Angeles attorney observes, \"I began to wake up every morning wondering what sort of dirty trick opposing counsel would pull that day.\" The director of the California Bar's Lawyer Assistance Project says, \"I've never seen such a lonely profession\u2014there's an inability to connect with other people at a deep level because there's so much of an adversarial relationship. The profession in a lot of ways makes it difficult to build trust.\" An unhappy big firm lawyer in the Southwest writes to complain about fellow lawyers who \"procrastinated and then shoved work onto others at the last minute,\" lawyers who \"took credit for other people's work,\" and about the \"general smugness\" that he found \"ubiquitous in large firms.\" A government lawyer complains about being frustrated by \"mid-level government bureaucrats who were shameless toadies to anyone above them and petty tyrants to those below them.\" Another attorney simply states his complaint about the practice: \"I have always said that the practice of law would be a happy profession if it wasn't for opposing counsel, clients and judges.\"\n\nAn East Coast lawyer recalls the morning he was taking a deposition in Connecticut when the receptionist mentioned that a plane had just crashed into the World Trade Center. As the morning went on, and the terrible fact of the twin towers' collapse became known, the deposition proceeded:\n\nWe didn't really know what else to do, and figured that it was going to be hard for people to get back to their homes anyway, so we just carried on with the deposition all that day and the next. And the striking thing to me was that everybody carried on pretty much as normal, bickering and squabbling over every little thing. And it just seemed very petty, given the events going on that day.\n\nJust as there are lawyers who report good and bad experiences with other lawyers, reports about client relationships are also a mixed bag. One attorney says \"rarely are any of my clients happy to see me, because if they need to see me, they are going through some sort of life crisis.\" A Kansas lawyer came to realize suddenly that clients were at times her \"greatest obstacle to happiness as a lawyer\":\n\nI was working late one night to get ready for a big and important trial where millions of dollars and jobs were at stake. In the middle of going over very technical, mind-numbing budget numbers, my client looked at me and said, \"You don't do any 'happy law,' do you?\" I was floored. Until then, despite the grueling hours, the lack of recognition, the abuse by clients, partners, and staff, the impact on my family, my health, and my sleep, I still loved my job as a bankruptcy lawyer. But I had never thought about it that way before. I realized that almost everything we do as lawyers involves unhappy people who are asking us to solve their unhappy problems, and many times there is no good solution that will make the client happy. And, I have found out, misery loves company and unhappy people want to make YOU unhappy.\n\nClients can be a source of unhappiness, a source of joy, and a source of the deepest anguish you can imagine in practicing law. Death penalty lawyer Sean O'Brien relates his worst experience practicing law:\n\nOn October 20, 1992, I had to break the news to Ricky Grubbs, a mentally retarded man, that the U.S. Supreme Court had declined to hear his case, and that he was going to be executed forthwith. I tried to break the news gently, \"The Court decided not to hear your case.... your appeals are over... Governor Ashcroft is not going to intervene.... there is nowhere else to go....\" He kept asking \"What's that mean?\" until I finally had to tell him that he was going to be executed right away, tonight. While I was talking to Ricky the guards came for him with the gurney, took him off the phone, strapped him down and killed him.\n\nThat case, O'Brien says, \"sent me to a dark, angry place for a long time.\"\n\nWhile some lawyers' darkest moments come from their clients, or what happens to their clients, other lawyers find them their greatest source of professional joy. A public defender from New Jersey says, \"My best experiences revolved around showing my clients that someone in the criminal justice system cared for them and their well-being. Some clients came to trust me after I was able to show them that I was completely on their side, no matter what they had done. That type of trust, which has to be first earned and then maintained, gave me the greatest satisfaction.\" An experienced attorney in Ohio, after having represented some of the same clients for over three decades, is of the same mind. He reports that several clients have \"become some of my closest friends\" and are the people he turns to when it is time to put away the briefcase and have fun.\n\nIf relationships are central to happiness, then it is hard to fault the advice of a South Carolina lawyer who writes, \"Try to avoid working with angry, nasty people. Try to find work with people who treat you with a basic level of dignity and respect. Try hard to treat the people around you, especially those down the food chain from you, the same way.\" Conflict, mistrust, and ungratefulness are, unfortunately, always going to be part of a lawyer's job. But how big a part they are will depend upon the job you choose.\n\n### ABOUT FINDING THE FLOW\n\nYou didn't need to buy this book to know that interesting work makes us happier than boring or anxiety-producing work. The challenge, of course, is identifying the work that interests you and then finding a way to get paid for it. The luckiest lawyers in the world are those who each morning can't wait to head into the office and find themselves asking, from time to time, \"How is it that I actually get paid for doing work that I love so much?\" Does that describe you? It probably does not. Law practice typically mixes interesting work with the not-so-interesting, includes fun cases and the not-fun cases, and offers both absorbing and tedious problems.\n\nThere is something appealing about the nature of law practice that got you to law school in the first place. Perhaps you always enjoyed puzzle-solving and recognized that law practice provides an opportunity to solve challenging real-world problems. What facts can I develop that will present my client's case most favorably? What case out there in Westlaw's or LexisNexis's cyberspace of cases best furthers my client's cause? What set of questions will best serve to weaken the power of an opposing lawyer's witness? Puzzles such as these, for the right person, can soak up time and attention.\n\nWe all know law practice is not just a bowl of cherries. There are humdrum cases, lengthy forms to fill out, footnotes to put in order, and billing documentation, in its six or ten or fifteen-minute increments, to complete. There are many times when law doesn't flow like a mountain stream in spring. Admit it: sometimes law practice is boring. Consider Catherine Kersh's description of a \"no flow\" experience when she worked as litigator at a big firm on the West Coast. Kersh, who now works for a nonprofit group administering scholarships, remembered spending a period of weeks in which she and many other associates were stuck in a room reviewing endless boxes of documents: \"Every day, for 12 hours, [we] fastened Post-it notes to legal briefs. 'You look around at the other associates, trying to remind ourselves, why did we go to law school?'\"\n\nThe goal is to improve the ratio of enjoyable work to tedious work. To some extent, this happens naturally over the course of a career, as your firm hires younger associates to do the more routine bottom-of-the-totem-pole work that almost every firm has. Also, in many cases, as your career progresses you will gravitate to the type of work you find most interesting.\n\nIn our survey, lawyers identify a number of tasks they find especially tedious or unpleasant. A New York tax associate says, \"A lot of what I do\u2014poring over contracts, in particular, can be pretty dry. But I knew this before I signed up, so fair warning.\" A real estate attorney complains bitterly about recording billable hours: \"Time keeping is the worst part of being a lawyer and it is a drudge. It's a pain and you have to plow through it and I hate every second of it.\"\n\nMost lawyers, however, find their work to be generally satisfying. An Indiana lawyer suggests that you \"remember that the best part of being a lawyer is the intellectual challenges that face you every day. You get paid to creatively solve problems\u2014and the vast majority of workers don't get that luxury.\" An Alabama lawyer finds satisfaction in \"looking at chaos and imposing order on it, either in the form of telling a coherent story about it for a statement of facts or in the form of synthesizing a set of rules from it (legal research).\" A lawyer from the middle of the United States says, \"I enjoy writing and working with words tremendously. I usually do about seven drafts of everything I write and I convince myself that each draft is better than the previous one.\" A Chicago employment lawyer finds flow \"the moment when I sit down to ask the first question in an important deposition,\" and on \"jury trial days.\" A happy Vermont lawyer describes how flow comes \"all the time\":\n\nI absolutely love writing a brief or legal memorandum or motion for a client; I enjoy the research and especially the challenge of putting all the pieces of the puzzle together in a way that is persuasive. I also love working on Excel spreadsheets and doing child support calculations and examining tax issues for a client, to see what the best financial solution might be for a client.\n\nA patent lawyer in New York agrees:\n\nOne of the things I love about practicing law is that it is so engaging that 'clock-watching' is rarely a problem. I often felt that way as a patent prosecutor: I loved the initial stages of patent prosecution: working with the inventors and writing a patent application. I could put in 17 hour days with barely a break, and go home happy, and start in early the next day again.\n\nA commercial lawyer from Nevada finds time passes quickly when he has the opportunity to work with colleagues on a meaningful case:\n\nI experienced flow regularly when working on team projects with two or more colleagues, putting together filings and strategizing. The solitary work of research and writing has never generated flow for me, but working in concert with others on a time deadline has almost been sublime, even when there was ostensible pressure and should have been anxiety.\n\nExperienced trial attorneys, unsurprisingly, report finding flow in trials. Noted criminal defense lawyer James Brosnahan says, \"Nothing compares to the electricity of an actual trial, and it is magnified when it is a jury trial.\" According to Brosnahan, there's great satisfaction in representing criminal defendants who feel the whole world is against them. He recalls his first meeting with John Lindh, the young California man who was the first American to face terrorism-related charges after 9\u201311. Lindh greeted him with the words, \"'Boy, am I glad to see you.'\" \"That's why I became a trial lawyer,\" says Brosnahan. Also finding flow in trials is an attorney who writes that the \"first few minutes in an opening statement is magic. The world belongs to me. Nothing matters but the words coming out of my mouth.\"\n\nWhen the flow is not there, consider changing jobs. A former New York tax attorney, who felt anxiety from having \"a lot of work dumped on me without explanation or guidance\" finds greater satisfaction in public interest litigation:\n\nI started to get the chance to feel like I knew what I was doing. I'd be the one who knew the most about the case, from reviewing all the documents and doing the legal research, and it's a good feeling to feel like you're on top of things and contributing. It's just like when you're a child\u2014it feels good to master things, and it's unpleasant when you don't know what you're doing and no one is helping you.\n\nA civil rights lawyer offers perhaps the best advice on finding happiness in the actual practice of law:\n\nEvery day, you're going to get up and do something (interview people, go through documents to find facts, negotiate, write persuasive arguments, draft documents, or something else), so make sure that it is something that you enjoy doing.\n\n### ABOUT ALIGNING WORK AND YOUR VALUES\n\nYou are happiest when you think your work matters. Like everyone else, you want to make a positive difference in the world. When work aligns with your values you feel good about what you're doing. It's a simple fact, an obvious fact, but one that often spells the difference between careers that are satisfying and those that are not.\n\nWhen a lawyer feels his or her efforts don't matter and aren't valued, even good pay and good colleagues are not enough to produce happiness. Sometimes unhappiness stems from projects that seem to be a waste of time. A Florida attorney writes:\n\nI did not enjoy working on matters that were not meaningful to me. Once I was working on a matter that required me to travel around a state to interview members within an industry. After toiling over a month on the interviews and the report, it landed in a pile of bureaucratic paper wastage and probably wasn't read. A nice income doesn't deaden that kind of suck from one's life-force.\n\nFor some attorneys, the problem is not that their work is of no account but rather that they sense they've joined the wrong side. They're working for the Empire, and no Force will ever be with them. A lawyer in Tennessee tells this story:\n\nMy firm represented a couple of slimy real estate developers. My managing partner assigned me to clean up all their dirty work. They were being sued by just about everyone with whom they had ever dealt. I was taking a deposition of a woman who was suing them over a landlord\/tenant dispute and she interrupted the deposition saying, \"You seem like a nice person. How do you sleep at night representing these scumbags?\" For one of the only times in my life, I was speechless! The truth hurts.\n\nIf some of lawyers' darkest moments come when their work is either unvalued or undermines their own sense of justice, it is also true that some of their brightest days come when they believe that their work made a positive difference in their clients' lives. Attorney Jim Husen, a family law lawyer in South Carolina, observes that \"people come to us when they are caught up in the vortexes of institutional power or face insurmountable obstacles or feel like they have been wronged.\" He says that to help clients, lawyers must \"draw on everything in our lives.\" In identifying so deeply with the causes of his clients, Husen finds satisfaction: \"I can think of almost no other job where that kind of commitment is called for.\"\n\nTime and time again, when asked to relate their peak experiences as lawyers, respondents in our survey point to cases in which they contributed to just outcomes that affected individual lives. Typical is the response of a Pennsylvania lawyer who says, \"When a client left court with the child custody she so desperately wanted, that made me happy.\" A Massachusetts attorney reports, \"I filed suit against a non-profit student study abroad organization for having placed my client in a home in Chile where she was repeatedly raped by her host brother. I settled the case with just filing the complaint. It's what I went to law school to do.\"\n\nA family law lawyer from North Carolina tells of \"a precious moment\" in her career that \"still brings tears to my eyes\":\n\nI was finishing a very contentious collaborative divorce. The husband and wife had been married almost 20 years and the marriage ended badly with a lot of discord but they shared a commitment to co-parenting their children. It was not the lovey-dovey case that most people imagine collaborative divorces to be, but they worked very hard and we came up with a deal that suited both of them. We gathered for the signing ceremony and were waiting for the notary to arrive. Someone suggested that we ought to sit and have a beer while we waited and our host happened to have some in the fridge. The husband and wife decided they didn't want a whole beer and decided to share one. It was an intimate moment that seemed to bring back memories of many times shared. The notary arrived, the papers were signed. As we stood up to leave, the husband and wife looked at each other and hugged. As they held each other, he tenderly petted her hair and each thanked the other for everything that had worked in their marriage and for working so hard to come to agreement.\n\nFor a Springfield, Missouri, lawyer a peak experience that came to mind was at the conclusion of a guardianship proceeding involving a female patient in the adult psychiatric unit in a hospital that she represented:\n\nHer partner was unable to care for her any longer, as he was very ill. Our patient was not safe to leave the hospital without a guardian, as she was severely mentally ill, and could not be relied upon to take her prescribed medications on her own. Thankfully, the court appointed the public administrator to serve as this patient's guardian. As I was leaving the courthouse that day, the patient's long-term partner approached me with tears in his eyes. He was frail and very thin, and was coughing up blood into his handkerchief. He told me that he was dying of AIDS and that he could no longer take care of his beloved. He had managed her medications for many years, but his doctor told him that he would die very soon, so he decided it was time to find someone else to take care of her. He took my hand, looked into my eyes, and thanked me for obtaining a guardian for his one true love. He explained that he could now die in peace because he knew she would be taken care of.\n\nSeveral estate lawyers tell us they find great satisfaction in their work. For example, an estate lawyer from Arizona says:\n\nI absolutely LOVE helping clients maneuver through two of the inevitable aspects of life: Death and Taxes. From the time I was a first year attorney, I knew I could provide great assistance to my clients by providing clear guidance to them which would ultimately make the transition of their assets after they die to the people and charities that mattered the most to them. I have always enjoyed teaching my clients about estate planning and dispelling the myths that others tell about probate or taxes. When a client dies and the estate plan \"matures,\" I feel it is an honor to be the person that the surviving loved ones turn to for help in handling the deceased client's affairs. It always gave me pride in being able to take the burden off those left behind so that I can focus on the paperwork, while they are able to focus on grieving as they need to and getting stronger emotionally day after day.\n\nAlignment of work with values comes naturally for lawyers who obtain positions with public interest firms that match their values and politics. For a New Jersey American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) lawyer, satisfaction comes from working on a daily basis for a cause he strongly supports:\n\nEvery day that I go to work at the ACLU, I strive to advance values that make this country great: freedom, democracy, and equality. I work on a wide range of constitutional rights issues, including freedom of speech, freedom of assembly, freedom of the press, religious liberty, privacy, the right to be free from unwarranted police intrusion, the right to counsel, racial justice, gender equality, student rights, reproductive freedom, lesbian and gay rights, voting rights, and prisoner rights.... Those who work at the ACLU and other public interest organizations are not motivated by the desire to get rich, but rather by the desire to achieve the greater good. I believe that this difference helps to create a wonderful, collaborative, and supportive atmosphere in the office. Though we often work long hours, we do so because we want to and without resentment. Our work to preserve civil liberties and civil rights is a labor of love.\n\nSome lawyers find satisfaction in making things possible that tangibly improve their communities. For example, a large-firm real estate developer had this to say about what he found most satisfying in his practice:\n\nThe fun part of practicing revolves around feeling like you've accomplished something that's significant. Whether that's helping someone save a building and turn it into a hotel or helping the guys at a struggling shopping mall that's a liability to the city turn it into a useful asset.\n\nThe votes are in, and it is clear that aligning your work and your values contributes to lawyer happiness. But how do you do that? You have to pay the bills after all\u2014and sometimes the most satisfying cases are neither ones that pay well or do much to advance your career. A lawyer in our survey bemoans the day he chose prestige over principles:\n\nI went to law school intent on becoming a civil rights lawyer. My hero was Clarence Darrow because he was my mother's hero. Before I even knew what a lawyer was, she would tell me tales of this great man who took on unpopular causes, always championing the underdog. I ended up a victim of my own success. High grades and law review, followed by a federal judicial clerkship, opened doors to the highest-paying, most prestigious job opportunities. People I respected, my judge and my brother (a successful lawyer), told me no one in their right minds would turn down an offer from the [Biggest & Best] law firm. But it was never for me. I knew that at the interview. The partners were stuffy, arrogant, and conservative. It was not a good fit. But instead of following my own heart, I did what other people thought I should do. Bad mistake.\n\nMany lawyers do find themselves stuck in jobs they don't want. Don't wait too long to make your move, suggests a New Orleans environmental lawyer:\n\nI know so many people who feel stuck in jobs they don't want. In the beginning, they knew it was not for them, but said, I'll work here, advocating positions I don't like and working 2000+ hours a year for just a while. Once I make lots of money, I will move on. They get in it and find themselves vested and unable or unwilling to take the risk. Years of their lives will get by them with little reward except perhaps money, and that does not compensate them for having no life. I say, take a job that satisfies you and allows you to embrace your interests now, not later.... Working for people, and undertaking causes and cases, you believe in. I call that Tikkun Olam, leaving the world a better place.\n\nIf you get it wrong, don't be afraid to change course. You'll have company. Eighty-five percent of lawyers change jobs at least once during their careers. A lawyer who practiced in the state of Washington offers this advice on how to keep your values and work relatively aligned as your career progresses:\n\nWrite a letter to yourself explaining why you went to law school and what you hope to accomplish in your life with your law degree, for yourself, for your family, and for others. Put that letter in a safe place and look at it at least once a year. You can edit that letter from time to time. Circumstances and dreams change, after all. But if you change course, do it consciously and for good reasons. Be in charge.\n\n### ABOUT CAREER PATHS AND HAPPINESS\n\nHumans are happiness-seeking animals. When a choice, including a career choice, fails to bring the expected level of happiness and another opportunity arises, we usually leap to grab it. In the case of lawyers, the most striking trend over the course of a career is the number of lawyers who leave private practice for other law jobs. As the American Bar Association reports, \"As lawyers move deeper into their careers, fewer and fewer work in private practice.\" Nationally, eight out often lawyers depart from large law firms by their fifth year of practice. Unsurprisingly, most move to other law jobs, but a significant number of lawyers eventually find their way into nonlaw jobs. Among graduates of Stanford Law School, to take one example, 2 percent of the class of 2005 held nonlaw positions within three years of graduation from law school, but among graduates fifteen to twenty-five years out, more than 20 percent had shifted out of law practice entirely.\n\nMany who leave law practice have law to thank for their new careers. For example, one lawyer who worked at law firms representing musicians jumped to a nonlegal management position in a music company. For lawyers with the right credentials, this type of move is not unusual. Companies recognize that well-trained lawyers bring a lot to the corporate table. One entertainment industry executive observed, \"When you hire a lawyer, you're getting someone really smart and open to learning.\"\n\nOther former practitioners apply their knowledge of the law in new fields. Legal journalism is one example. Dahlia Lithwick is a former divorce attorney in Reno who became a popular commentator and reporter on cases at the U.S. Supreme Court for the online magazine _Slate_. She describes how she fell into her new job and found happiness. Working on divorces, Lithwick discovered, \"was not my thing.\" On a trip to Washington, D.C., to visit a friend, good fortune came from a chance phone call. _Slate_ called her friend, a professional writer, to see if she could cover a trial. After saying she couldn't, she handed the phone to Lithwick, who took the job. She found _Slate_ to be the \"perfect forum in which to write\u2014this instant, slightly quirky humor, kind of 'law as theater.'\" Lithwick says:\n\nI really do feel that I might be one of those lucky people who stumbled into the perfect job when she was 30 years old... I wake up every morning, and I'm so happy... I can't quite fathom what would be as wonderful as this.\n\nMost law school graduates do not leave the practice of law, but they still tend to get happier over time, even those who stay in practice. As time marches on, lawyers gain competence and new responsibilities and achieve a greater sense of control. One partner, reflecting back on his days as an associate, observes:\n\nWhen I was an associate, there were times when I would wake up and dread the day.... Having to answer to so many people was frustrating.... Associates don't normally get to see the project the whole way through which makes lack of control an issue for them.\n\nSome litigators conclude they would rather be transactional lawyers. The roller-coaster life of a litigator has great rewards, but it isn't for everyone. As one litigator tells us, \"The highs are higher and the lows are lower compared to the experiences of a typical transactional lawyer.\" Sometimes the ups and downs occur while working with the same case: a trial victory can quickly turn into an appellate loss, or vice versa.\n\nThe fact is you might be wrong about what kind of practice best suits your skill set and your personality. A federal district judge has these words of advice:\n\nMany new lawyers know exactly the law they would like to practice and they are right. Many think they know what kind of law they would like to practice and they are wrong. Others, like me, had no idea what type of practice will lead to the greatest job satisfaction. Of course, there is no way to know in advance what field of law will be most personally rewarding. All one can do is begin, discover and adjust.... I began my career representing banks, corporations and insurance companies. I concluded it representing people. I found that representing people was far more gratifying professionally. Coincidentally, it was more remunerative as well. If you think you know what you want to do, do it. If you do not know, engage in a general practice until you gravitate to that field.\n\nA sports law attorney regrets that legal education doesn't provide a systematic means for experimenting with career options:\n\nI wish the legal system had a 'residency requirement' similar to the practice of medicine. A young lawyer could work various 'rotations' to experience various practice areas to determine what they like\/don't like.\n\nThe type of practice you develop may not be one that you envision when you start out. When Bill Colby was a young lawyer and took on a pro bono probate matter, he never envisioned it would become the first right-to-die case to reach the U.S. Supreme Court. It was a guardianship for the parents of Nancy Cruzan, a young woman who had been in a persistent vegetative state for four years following a single-car accident. Her family was united in their belief that Nancy would not have wanted to live that way and they desired to remove her feeding tube. The Missouri attorney general opposed removal of medically supplied nutrition and hydration and the case wended its way to the U.S. Supreme Court.\n\nThe Court held that competent people have a constitutional due process right to refuse life-sustaining treatment. For an incompetent patient like Nancy, the Court ruled that the state of Missouri could require her parents to produce clear and convincing evidence of their daughter's wishes. Colby assembled that evidence when friends of Nancy came forward after hearing about the case in the firestorm of media coverage. A number of years after the Supreme Court decision in _Cruzan v. Director, Missouri Department of Health_ , Colby relinquished his partnership at the firm to write _Long Goodbye: The Deaths of Nancy Cruzan_. He later became a senior fellow with the Center for Practical Bioethics. In that capacity he was able to give lectures at medical schools, hospitals, and hospices about end of life issues. Part of his life's work has been dedicated to making sure other families will not have to suffer anguishing legal battles at the end of their loved ones' lives. Today, he is the general counsel at a large, inner city safety net hospital system.\n\nColby cautions that not every pro bono case will be like _Cruzan_ \u2014they are not all of national importance or life-altering for the lawyer. He tells law students \"that a lot of them get ungrateful clients, and witnesses that lie to you; and you don't feel that you're still helping to solve society's problems, which is what lawyers do.\" But many cases you take will be life-altering for your clients: \"I feel lucky that I got to know that family and had the chance to help them, and that I was involved in an issue that is important to society. But for me it was always about the family and getting to their end\u2014as bad as that end was.\"\n\nIn addition to not being afraid to take a new path, a large part of Colby's happiness may have to do with how he looks back at the path he has taken. If _you_ are fortunate\u2014and Colby's \"luck\" may relate to his general outlook on the world as much as the circumstances of that little pro bono probate matter he agreed to handle\u2014you may take away life lessons. The _Cruzan_ case, he says, \"was a great blessing for me, because it always gave me and still today gives me the ability (when I start to get the grump-its even a little bit) to say my life's pretty good\u2014which is nice to have.\"\n\nIf there is one consistent piece of career advice that experienced lawyers seem to give law graduates it is to follow their bliss. One former lawyer, now a teacher, has this to say:\n\nFollow your heart in choosing your career path. It's the most important advice I give my students each year. Such simple advice, yet so hard to follow. If you get it wrong the first time, which you are likely to do, don't be afraid to change course.\n\nHis sentiments are echoed by another attorney from the nation's capital:\n\nMy advice to a recent graduate is: find something that you love to do, something that will motivate you to get out of bed when you are tired, something that you will try to work on when you are sick, something that you would want to do even if you didn't have to earn a living, and then see if someone will pay you to do that work. And, understand that even when you're in the right job, doing the right thing, and happy, there will still be bad days, there will still be things that you don't like. There will be moments when you don't think you can do what needs to be done. Take a breath, take some chocolate, triage, prioritize, get something done, cross it off your list and move on to the next thing. Don't let the best be the enemy of the good.\n\n#### WHAT HAPPINESS RESEARCH PREDICTS ABOUT YOUR CAREER\n\n1. You are more likely to be happy with your career if you work in solo practice or a small firm than in a large firm.\n\n2. You are more likely to be happy if you work for the government than for a private firm.\n\n3. You are more likely to be happy if your compensation is above $70,000 per year than if it is below that amount.\n\n4. You are more likely to be happy if you have been a lawyer for ten years or more than if you recently graduated from law school.\n\n5. You are more likely to be happy if you've always wanted to be a lawyer since a young age.\n\n6. You are likely happy with the intellectual challenge that your law career affords.\n\n7. If you are a woman, you are more likely to be dissatisfied with your work-life balance than if you are a man.\n\n8. You are more likely to be happy if you like and trust the people you work with.\n\n9. You are somewhat less likely to be happy with your career if you graduated from a top national law school than if you graduated from a \"fourth-tier\" law school.\n\n10. You are more likely to be happy if you believe that your work aligns with your values.\n\n11. You are most likely to complain about lack of feedback, lack of work-life balance, unethical attorneys and ungrateful clients, and meaningless work.\n\n12. You are likely to change jobs three or more times before your career ends.\n\n13. You are likely, at the end of your career, not to regret your decision to become a lawyer (although there will have been days when you questioned your decision).\n\n## **CHAPTER 8\n\nSeeking Happier Ground**\n\n_To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven... A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance..._\n\n\u2014 _Ecclessiates_ 3:1\u20133:4\n\n_How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives._\n\n\u2014Annie Dillard, _The Writing Life_\n\nTHE BOOKS OF OUR CHILDHOOD TOLD OF LIVES LIVED happily ever after. As adults, we know that real lives are never like that. There is no kingdom of happiness that we cross into and then dwell within forever. Happiness is a shifting landscape on which no person ever becomes a permanent resident. The best we can hope for is to grab our share of visits. We also recognize that what brings us happiness at one time might not the next. If someone offers a surefire recipe for happiness, be skeptical. What happiness we experience is the result of a mix of genetics, circumstances, and our own thoughts and actions. The complexities of our emotions are beyond capture in a formula. We can, however, as this book has sought to demonstrate, increase the likelihood that we will experience more happiness in our legal careers. We do what we can, and we hope that it is enough. Sometimes, as songwriter Townes Van Zandt says, \"the blue wind blows our dreams away.\" But on other days, the gentle breeze comes, the clouds part, and the sun begins to shine.\n\nHow do we position ourselves to best capture that kind breeze when it comes along? That's really what this book has been about. But we need to understand that sometimes skies stay gray for longer stretches than we'd like; we need to appreciate our emotional lows as well as our highs.\n\n### MAKING THE BEST OF IT: THE USEFULNESS OF BOREDOM AND MELANCHOLY\n\nWe'll be the first to admit that you could act on every piece of advice offered in this book and still not be happy. Perfect happiness was not part of the plan. (Whether it's God's or Evolution's, we'll leave for you to decide.) Sometimes our genetic makeup, in the form of a low happiness set point or a predisposition to depression, keeps us tethered to unhappy ground. At other times, adverse circumstances\u2014ranging from marital or health problems to a bad slump for our favorite sports team\u2014block our path to happiness. Be patient. Those less-than-happy times of our lives are inevitable and it's important that we make the best of them.\n\nMartin Seligman, probably the most prominent voice in the positive psychology movement, admitted that he once believed that he could make a person happy just by ridding them of their sadness. He found, however, that he couldn't. When he simply focused on ridding a patient of his sadness what he got was not a happy person but an empty one.\n\nHappiness and sadness are not opposite sides of the same coin; they are sides of different coins. Both are necessary in any complete life. If you're feeling sad, sometimes you just have to accept that sadness is part of life. Would you value your happiness as much if you've never been sad? Could you say you really _knew_ happiness if you'd never met unhappiness? Carl Jung, founder of analytical psychiatry, noted that the \"word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not compensated by some sadness.\" Of all the many conversations Eric Weiner had during his worldwide exploration of \"the geography of bliss,\" none stuck with him more than the comment of a musician in the happy city of Reykjavik, Iceland: \"'I'm happy, but I cherish my melancholia.'\"\n\nNurture your melancholy and use it as an opportunity for personal growth or better self-understanding. Melancholy is critical to an understanding of what it means to be human. It leads, as Eric G. Wilson argued in _Against Happiness: In Praise of Melancholy_ , to an awareness of things passing, and from that awareness we gain a deeper sense of our own mortality and, it is hoped, a better grasp of the world's fragile beauty. Or, as Alan Wolfe recently contended, \"[A]n unhappy consciousness may take us further toward understanding than a Bovary-like contentment.\"\n\nThe notion that melancholy might have its beneficial aspects is not new. Aristotle contended that \"all men who have attained excellence in poetry, in art and politics, even Socrates and Plato, had a melancholic habitus.\" Charles Darwin, a rather melancholic soul himself, suspected that sadness serves an evolutionary purpose in that it is \"well adapted to make a creature guard against any great or sudden evil.\"\n\nNeuroscience research supports Aristotle's and Darwin's ideas that melancholy promotes creativity and helps focus the mind on problems. Negative moods increase activity in the prefrontal cortex and make \"it easier to pay continuous attention to a difficult dilemma.\" Persistence, a side-benefit of melancholy, is a trait associated with people who achieve success in creative fields; authors and artists often walk on the dark side. Also, research shows, sadness correlates with a \"more successful communication style,\" higher scores on intelligence tests, a better ability to judge the accuracy of rumors, and enhanced recall. In one study, shoppers remembered four times as many trinkets stacked near a check-out counter on rainy days than they did on sunny days. Jonah Lehrer, in a _New York Times Magazine_ article summarizing the recent research, concludes that sadness \"draws us toward our proplems, like a magnet to metal.\" When sadness enters your day at the office, tackle that complicated legal question that you've put on the back burner. There is, as Ecclesiates reminds us, \"a time to mourn and a time to dance.\" Accept what both times can offer you.\n\nBoredom is the pale hint of sadness. Just as into every life a little rain must fall, into every career a little boredom must creep. Not every task in a lawyer's day can produce flow. There will be repetitious tasks and tedious tasks. In a 1994 commencement address, poet Joseph Brodsky told Dartmouth College graduates, \"A substantial part of what lies ahead of you is going to be claimed by boredom.\" He warned that \"even unusually gifted individuals must endure boredom.\" Boredom compels us to invent means to escape its clutches. In the context of careers, your avenue of escape might entail looking for a more satisfying job. Although this search might keep you entertained for a while, Brodsky warned that \"before long this quest turns into a full-time occupation, with your need for an alternative coming to match a drug addict's daily fix.\" Instead, he urged that we learn from boredom one of life's most central lessons: Boredom \"is your window on time's infinity.... It puts your existence in proper perspective, the net result of which is precision and humility.... And the more finite a thing is, the more it is charged with life, emotions, joy, fears, compassion.\"\n\nDo not try to be happy 100 percent of the time. You will fail. More than that, you will not realize your potential. Comedian Conan O'Brien, being serious for a moment, ended his 2000 commencement address to Harvard University students with a wish that they experience both times of happiness and times of sadness: \"So that's what I wish for all of you. The bad as well as the good. Fall down, make a mess, break something occasionally, and remember the story is never over.\"\n\nDo not run from sadness and boredom. The path to happiness often runs through, not around, those often unappreciated emotional states.\n\n### THE WELL-LIVED LIFE\n\nWe've saved for this last chapter one of the most important messages we want to convey: happiness isn't everything. In fact, as odd as it may seem for the authors of a book called _The Happy Lawyer_ to say, happiness isn't even\u2014for everybody\u2014the most important thing.\n\nFor most of human history, happiness wasn't the issue, survival was. And when philosophers began their serious pondering, they by and large ignored the question of happiness and focused on other values such as virtue and honor and loyalty. The primary message of our central religious texts, the Bible, the Koran, and others, is not \"Be happy!\" In a world of war and woe, who could question the words of Thomas Jefferson: \"Perfect happiness... was never intended by the Deity to be the lot of his creatures.\"\n\nHistory shows us that obsession with happiness is a modern development made possible by the high standard of living now enjoyed by many occupants of the planet. Our expectations for achieving happiness\u2014at least in _this_ life\u2014outstrip our capacity to achieve it. Setting realistic goals about our own future happiness, including happiness in our careers, is the first step toward getting there. Your brain, unable to comprehend life's messy reality, has constructed an abstract and nearly perfect model of the ideal job. Your real job, in contrast to the ideal job lodged in your brain, will always fall short, given the sometimes triviality of day-to-day work in the office and a law career's inevitable disappointments.\n\nAs you stumble into dissatisfaction from time to time, remember that those other high values of old still matter. A single-minded striving for personal happiness can damage the fabric of society if it leads to neglect of family or community.\n\nFortunately, as we've suggested, the best path to happiness lies _in the direction_ of family and community. The point here is that the search for happiness, properly undertaken, can lead to a life well-lived. Being true to the noblest values of our profession will almost never hinder your quest for career satisfaction. If you turn out to be one of those persons constitutionally unable to find true happiness, find consolation in knowing that you have served your values and done well by others.\n\nBut, hey, you bought this book because you wanted a happier career as a lawyer, not because you want to be told that it's okay if that doesn't happen. And, of course, happier is better than not. We'll end this exploration of lawyer happiness by reminding ourselves of what we consider most central to satisfying careers in law.\n\n### GETTING READY FOR HAPPINESS\n\nYou move toward happier ground when you first open yourself up to the possibility of becoming a happier lawyer. Lawyers are purposeful people. You might be inclined to tell yourself, \"I'm going to become happier, damn it, and I'm going to become happier right now!\" In fact, such an attitude more likely will prolong your unhappiness than lead you out of it. As John Stuart Mill once noted, \"'Happiness should be approached sideways like a crab.'\"\n\nHappiness is experienced mainly in the present. Obsessing about your unhappiness, or overanalyzing your condition, takes you out of the present and into your past or future. To quote Mill again, \"Ask yourself if you are happy and you cease to be so.\" With that caveat in mind, what attitudes or steps get us heading toward a more satisfying career? Let's review what we consider to be the five factors most closely tied to lawyer happiness.\n\n#### 1. FIND WORK THAT INTERESTS YOU\n\nLet's consider the nature of your work. Does it interest you? Do you feel challenged by your work, yet not so much so as to be constantly anxious about your ability to meet the expectations of clients or supervisors? If the answer to either of these questions is \"no\"\u2014if you are bored by your work, or tired of filling out the same forms or making the same simple arguments\u2014it's time to explore whether you can change departments, clients, or the way you tackle your assignments. The field of law is not perfect, but it is, in many of its manifestations, challenging. If you don't feel challenged, look around, discover where the challenges are, and rise to meet them. A good first step to finding interesting work is to gain an understanding of your own competencies. Once you have identified your strengths, try to find a way to use them.\n\nGood work is challenging, but it also affords variety. As humans, we crave novelty. Performing the same task for the hundredth time will afford you little of the satisfaction that it once did. If you're lucky to find a job with not only content variety but also variety in work settings and colleagues so much the better. Novelty enhances the intensity of experience.\n\n#### 2. ALIGN YOUR WORK WITH YOUR VALUES\n\nThe closer your values align with your work, the happier you feel about your work. Even boring or anxiety-producing work has its benefits if it is consistent with your values. When asked to identify peak experiences, lawyer after lawyer in our study turned to cases where they believed that their work made a difference. There's a very important lesson here. Absorb it. Think about your deepest beliefs and, when there is a conflict between what your heart and what your head is telling you to do, listen to your heart.\n\nWhen you find work that you can love, commit to it. Commitment is a word associated most commonly with relationships, but it is no less central to a successful career than a successful marriage. Take that foot out of the door and you'll begin to build better workplace relationships and find greater career fulfillment.\n\n#### 3. BALANCE YOUR WORK AND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE\n\nAnother large theme in this book has been the importance of control. We've explained that control has many aspects, all of which are associated with increased career satisfaction. Still, for lawyers at least, one aspect stands above the others. If you feel good about the balance you have between your work obligations and your obligations to others (including family, friends, and self), you're likely to feel a lot better about your job.\n\nOf course, achieving a work-life balance is easier said than done. If your job makes such a balance impossible\u2014well, _do something_. If you are in a large firm, you might try to convince the powers-that-be that more concern about work-life balance issues is in the firm's long-term interest. If you are in solo practice or a small firm, perhaps you can learn to say \"no\" to some potential new clients, even if it means a loss of income.\n\nKids grow up quickly; your athletic prowess slips away; friendships die without attention. Don't keep postponing your happiness. You might just postpone it all the way to your graveyard.\n\n#### 4. DEEPEN WORKPLACE RELATIONSHIPS\n\n\"Social embeddedness\" is the single best predictor of happiness. Consider the people with whom your work hours are spent. If you are to become happier, in large part it will be because of them. If our exploration of happy lawyering has convinced us of anything, it is that relationships with other human beings are the greatest source of happiness. People who feel connected in meaningful ways with people they love and trust are best positioned to find happier ground. Trust: it's a small word with big meaning. The inability to trust will undermine happiness as surely as the capacity and willingness to trust will promote happiness\u2014in you and in those around you.\n\nPsychiatrist George Valliant devoted his lifetime to a seventy-year longitudinal study of Harvard University graduates of the late '30s and early '40s. When asked recently what the study taught him, he replied, \"That the only thing that really matters in life [is] your relationships to other people.\" Happiness is built above all on love, trust, and a sense of feeling valued. Should you not feel valued in your present workplace, should your present workplace not offer opportunities for deepening relationships, get out. There has to be some other job that would serve you better.\n\n#### 5. SAVOR THE SMALL PLEASURES\n\nBen Franklin urged people to find happiness in \"the little advantages\" of their daily lives. Almost all lawyers have some aspects of their jobs that give them pleasure. For you, it might be strategizing with colleagues about litigation, outlining an appellate brief, or just experiencing the sense of satisfaction that comes from clearing a few headaches out of your inbox. Whatever those moments are, recognize them. This requires some self-study: we are not all naturally attuned to what gives us genuine pleasure. The warm glow from achieving a good settlement, the buzz of excitement from brainstorming about an interesting case, the feeling of satisfaction from writing a well-turned phrase: Happiness is found in such moments. Savor them. Try to find ways to experience more of them. You might never experience the ecstasy of a winning a victory in the U.S. Supreme Court, but you will feel the pleasure of a client's compliment.\n\n### WHAT WILL BEING A HAPPY LAWYER DO FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE?\n\nAs nice as increased career satisfaction is, don't expect it to change your overall happiness level dramatically. As one career advisor pointed out, \"Asking a job to solve our unhappiness problem is asking too much of a job.\" She offered this analogy: It's \"like asking an exercycle to solve your weight problems without giving up doughnuts.\" Our overall happiness levels are more affected by our close personal relationships than they are by our career satisfaction. Developing a close set of nonwork friends, finding your true love, or making up with your estranged teenage daughter is the better bet for making life as a whole look sunny.\n\nStill, careers are important. In addition to meeting the innate need of humans to be competitive, a career adds to your \"self-complexity.\" Your career as a lawyer adds another dimension to your life. You may be, for example, a mother, a friend, a member of the P.T.A, a Presbyterian, and an Ohioan, but you are also a member of the legal profession. When things go sour in one or more of the other dimensions of your life, law can be a refuge or a source of pride. Your practice can be a buffer against setbacks in other domains of life. In general, the more self-complex we are, the more resilient we are\u2014and resilience in the face of difficulty is one of the best measures of a successful life.\n\nYou didn't need us to tell you that life is not one smile after another. You probably have realistic expectations as to how much more satisfying your law career can be. Even professional chocolate tasters have bad days at the office. We sincerely believe, however, that by taking some of the steps identified in this book you can have a happier career. The level of improvement is dependent upon such things as your happiness set point, what's going on in the rest of your life, the range of career options open to you, and how much you open yourself up to the possibility of greater career satisfaction.\n\n### A FINAL WORD\n\nIn the course of researching this book, we read a great many opinions about what makes us happy. Every author, it seems, uses the last page to identify the most important \"take away\" they want the reader to have. In our opinion, the best of these authors tended to circle around the same point: love makes us happier than anything. By this, we do not necessarily mean romantic love. Rather, it is the love inherent in _being attentive_ \u2014caring deeply about somebody or something. It could as well be love for justice or a cause or the life of the mind. British scholar Avner Offer puts the point concisely: \"Attention is the universal currency of well-being.\"\n\nWe generally think of love as it relates to our feelings for another human being. But it is also possible to love your job\u2014to pay attention to your work and to respect its traditions and noble goals. Like any marriage, your relationship with your work will have its tensions. There may be days when you wish you were doing something else. But as long as your work holds your attention, there's more than just hope for being a happy lawyer.\n\n## **Acknowledgments**\n\nWE ARE INDEBTED TO THE MORE THAN TWO HUNDRED lawyers across the country who took the (nonbillable) time to give thoughtful answers to our survey and share their stories.\n\nWe thank our colleagues and friends who brought so many different facets of their expertise to this project: Jasmine Abdel-khalik, David Achtenberg, Terri Beiner, Mark Berger, Bill Black, Paul Callister, Julie Cheslik, Bill Colby, Richard Delgado, Bob Downs, Alice Eakin, Jerald Enslein, Kathy Hall, Bob Hayman, Peter Huang, Mary Kay Kisthardt, Tony Luppino, Mira Mdivani, Lynda Moore, Sean O'Brien, Colin Picker, Judy Popper, Ortrie Smith, Barb Snell, Ellen Suni, Rob Verchick, Wanda Temm, Kevin Travis, and Dan Weddle. Special thanks to Lara Krigel Pabst, Andrew Schermerhorn, and Katie Woods for research assistance, to Elizabeth Johnson for administrative assistance, and to librarian Lawrence MacLachlan for research guidance. We also thank the University of Missouri-Kansas City Law Foundation for its research grant and the _Syracuse Law Review_ for permission to include a portion of our earlier article, _Happy Law Students, Happy Lawyers_ , 58 Syracuse L. Rev. 351 (2008), in this book. We are especially grateful to Naomi Cahn, June Carbone, Barb Glesner Fines, Aaron Geary, Andrew McClurg, and Allen Rostron for their thoughtful advice, constructive criticism, editing wizardry, playfulness, and unflagging support.\n\nOur greatest thanks are for our families, to whom this book is dedicated.\n\nOur gratitude is also an acknowledgement, that can't really be captured in words, of how important all of you are in our lives. You make us so happy.\n\n## **Notes**\n\n### _Foreword_\n\n. _Fax Poll: It Becomes a Miserable Profession_ , CAL. LAW., Mar. 1992, 3; Alex Williams, _The Falling Down Professions_ , N.Y. TIMES, Jan. 6, 2008, at 91.\n\n. Stephanie Francis Ward, _Pulse of the Legal Profession_ , A.B.A. J., Oct. 2007, 29, 32 (noting that only 44 percent of eight hundred survey respondents say \"I would recommend a legal career to a young person\").\n\n. Ashby Jones, _The Third Year Dilemma: Why Firms Lose Associates_ , WALL ST. J., Jan. 4,2006, _available at_ <http:\/\/208.144.:115-173\/salarydata\/law\/20060105-jones.html>.\n\n### _Chapter 1_\n\n. Robert Biswas-Diener et al., _Most People Are Pretty Happy, But There Is Cultural Variation: The Inughuit, the Amish, and the Maasai_ , 6 J. HAPPINESS STUD. 205 (Sept. 2005).\n\n. Sue M. Halpern, _Are You Happy?_ , 55 N.Y. REV. BOOKS 24 (Apr. 3, 2008), _available at_ <http:\/\/www.nybooks.com\/articles\/21197>.\n\n. John Monahan & Jeffrey Swanson, _Lawyers at Mid-Career: A 20-Year Longitudinal Study of Job and Life Satisfaction_ , 5 J. EMPIRICAL LEGAL STUD, I, 3 (forthcoming 2009).\n\n. RONIT DINOVITZER ET AL.,AFTER THE J.D.: FIRST RESULTS OF A NATIONAL STUDY OF LEGAL CAREERS 19 (2004); AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION, 2009 NATIONAL LAWYER POPULATION SURVEY, <http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/market research\/2009_NATL_LAWYER_by_State.pdf>\n\n. TOM W. SMITH, NATIONAL OPINION RESEARCH CENTER\/UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO, JOB SATISFACTION IN THE UNITED STATES (Apr. 17, 2007) [hereinafter \"NORC Study\"]. The NORC Study surveyed more than 27,500 randomly selected people concerning their job satisfaction and happiness in 198 occupations. Clergy reported the highest levels of both job satisfaction (87.2 percent very satisfied) and general happiness (67.2 percent very happy). Roofers had the lowest mean score (only 25.3 percent very satisfied) for job satisfaction, and service station attendants the lowest mean score for general happiness (only 13.2 percent were very happy); 52.4 percent of lawyers said they were very satisfied with their jobs, and 43 percent said they were generally happy in life.\n\n. Peter H. Huang & Rick Swedloff, _Authentic Happiness & Meaning at Law Firms_, 58 SYRACUSE L. REV. 335, 343 (2008).\n\n. Stephanie Francis Ward, _Pulse of the Legal Profession_ , A.B.A. J., Oct. 2007, at 30, 32.\n\n. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION YOUNG LAWYERS DIVISION, ABA YOUNG LAWYERS DIVISION SURVEY: CAREER SATISFACTION 17 (2001), <http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/yld\/satisfaction_8oo.doc>. The survey of 2,136 members of the Young Lawyers Division yielded 842 responses. \"Most young lawyers are at least somewhat satisfied both with their current job and with the practice of law generally.\" _Id._ at 1. These numbers match up with an American Bar Foundation study of Chicago lawyers in the mid-1990s, in which 84 percent reported being either satisfied or very satisfied with their work. John P. Heinz et al., _Content With Their Calling? Work Satisfaction in the Chicago Bar_ , 9 AM. B. FOUND. PUB. 1 (1998).\n\n. Susan Daicoff _Lawyer, Be Thyself: An Empirical Investigation of the Relationship Between the Ethic of Care, the Feeling Decisionmaking Preference, and Lawyer Wellbeing_ , 16 VA. J. SOC. POL'Y & L. 87 (2008).\n\n. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION YOUNG LAWYERS DIVISION, _supra_ note 8, at 17.\n\n. For every report showing generally happy lawyers, fulfilled by their work, there's another with glum numbers suggesting the opposite. Is there an explanation for the contradictory results? One possibility\u2014and this is true for all the survey data\u2014may have to do with the different populations sampled. For instance, those who responded to the ABA Young Lawyers Division job satisfaction survey might disproportionately be people who like to belong\u2014joiners. Is it possible that ABA Young Lawyers are more gregarious and upbeat\u2014happier\u2014than the average lawyer? Sure, it is.\n\nAnother variable that can compromise the validity of studies is how they are phrased. If survey headings telegraph the results the researchers are seeking, respondents will be inclined to self-select either toward or away from participating and even give answers they think will please the researchers. As one example, \"the American Bar Association surveys conducted in 1984 and 1990 consisted of a mail-back questionnaire titled 'National Survey of Lawyer Satisfaction\/Dissatisfaction.' Although response rates for these surveys were fairly high, there is no way to know for sure whether disgruntled lawyers were disproportionately willing to participate.\" Kathleen E. Hull, _Cross-Examining the Myth of Lawyer Misery_ , 52 VAND. L. REV. 971, 972 (1999).\n\nSurvey results also depend heavily on the questions asked. If the question asked is \"Are you happy right now?,\" that will elicit a different set of responses than if the questions are about plans to leave a job within five years. Attorney satisfaction scores often stem from surveys that ask a domain-specific happiness question: \"Are you happy with your job?\" The reported domain-specific happiness scores can be affected by other life satisfaction variables or recent life events.\n\n. _Fax Poll: It Becomes a Miserable Profession_ , CAL. LAW., Mar. 1992, at 3; Alex Williams, _The Falling Down Professions_ , N.Y. TIMES, Jan. 6, 2008, at 91.\n\n. Heinz et al., _supra_ note 8, at 1.\n\n. Hull, _supra_ note 11, at 972. The _California Lawyer_ poll is discussed in the text _supra_ note 12.\n\n. Monahan & Swanson, _supra_ note 3, at 2.\n\n. Ronit Dinovitzer & Bryant G. Garth, _Lawyer Satisfaction in the Process of Structuring Legal Careers_ , 41 LAW & SOC'Y REV. 1 (2007).\n\n. Ward, _supra_ note 7, at 34.\n\n. Ashby Jones, _The Third Year Dilemma: Why Firms Lose Associates_ , WALL ST. J., Jan. 4, 2006, _available at_ <http:\/\/208.144.15-173\/salarydata\/law\/20060105-jones.html>.\n\n. Williams, _supra_ note 12, at 91.\n\n. DOUGLAS LITOWITZ, THE DESTRUCTION OF YOUNG LAWYERS: BEYOND ONE L 9 (2006).\n\n. Martin E.P. Seligman et al., _Why Lawyers Are Unhappy_ , 23 CARDOZO L. REV. 33,52 (2001).\n\n. Robert Kurson, _Who's Killing the Great Lawyers of Harvard?_ , ESQUIRE, Aug. 2000, at 84.\n\n. William W. Eaton et al., _Occupations and the Prevalence of Major Depressive Disorder_ , 32 J. OCCUPATIONAL MED. 1079, 1083 (1990); G. Andrew H. Benjamin et al., _The Prevalence of Depression, Alcohol Abuse, and Cocaine Abuse Among United States Lawyers_ , 13 INT'L J.L. & PSYCHIATRY 233, 240 (1990), _available at_ http:\/\/www.lawyerswithdepression.com\/uploads\/dep2.pdf. Other studies do not show that law is the occupational category with the very highest rate of suicide but still show that lawyers are in higher risk jobs. Steven Stack, _Occupation and Suicide_ , 82 SOC. SCI. Q. 384, 392 (June 2001).\n\n. Stack, _supra_ note 23, at 391.\n\n. In chapter 3 we explore further the question of whether the practice of law makes people unhappy or whether people prone to unhappiness are drawn to law.\n\n. _See_ Seligman et al., _supra_ note 21, at 45\u201449.\n\n. Hull, supra note 11, at 971.\n\n. _See, e.g._ , Monahan & Swanson, _supra_ note 3, at 2.\n\n. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION, LAWYER DEMOGRAPHICS, 2008, <http:\/\/www abanet.org\/marketresearch\/Lawyer_Demographics_2008.pdf>\n\n. Dinovitzer & Garth, _supra_ note 16, at 7; Ward, _supra_ note 7 at 32.\n\n. _Study Reveals Conflicts in Attorneys' Personal Lives_ , Mo. LAW. WKLY. Feb. 20, 2006, _available at_ 2006 WLNR 9004939; Ward, _supra_ note 7, at 34.\n\n. David G. Blanchflower & Andrew Oswald, 7s _Weil-Being U-Shaped Over the Life Cycle?_ , J. SOC. SCI. & MED. (Aug. 14, 2006), _available at_ http:\/\/www.nd.edu\/~adutt\/activities\/documents\/BlanchOsUshapeCohorts14Aug2006.pdf (thirty-five-year longitudinal study); Mark Killian, _TV Advertising Dilutes Public Confidence in the Profession_ , 30 FLA. B. NEWS 1 (July 15, 2003).\n\n. Ward, _supra_ note 7, at 32.\n\n. BUREAU OF LABOR STATISTICS, U.S. DEP'T OF LABOR, OCCUPATIONAL OUTLOOK HANDBOOK 2008\u201309, LAWYERS, <http:\/\/www.bls.gov\/oco\/ocos053.htm> (last visited July 20, 2009). The median salary for associates who have at least three years of experience in Houston is $86,300; $89,200 in Philadelphia; $93,500 in Washington D.C; and $105,800 in San Francisco, with a national average of $79,500. For mid-career attorneys (ten to fifteen years of experience), salaries range from $128,600 in Houston to $134,700 in Washington, D.C., and $143,700 in San Francisco, with a national average of $120,500. Justin Rebello, _Pay Scale: Who Makes What Where?, in_ TWENTY THINGS LAWYERS NEED TO KNOW 20\u201322 (Nov. 2008). The median salaries of all lawyers nine months after graduation in 2005 was $60,000; for those who entered private practice, it was $85,000; for those entering government work, $46,158; for those in academics or judicial clerkships, $45,000. BUREAU OF LABOR STATISTICS, _supra._\n\n. _See_ David Leonhardt, _Money Doesn't Buy Happiness... Well, On Second Thought..._ , N.Y. TIMES, Apr. 16, 2008, at CI (\"In the United States, about 90 percent of people in households making at least $250,000 called themselves 'very happy' in a recent Gallup Poll. In households with income below $30,000, only 42 percent of people gave that answer.\").\n\n. Daniel Kahneman et al., _Would You Be Happier If You Were Richer? A Focusing Illusion_ , SCIENCE, June 30, 2006, at 1908, 1909.\n\n. Daniel Gilbert, _What You Don't Know Makes You Nervous_ , N.Y. TIMES, May 20, 2009, at A35.\n\n. Betsey Johnson & Justin Wolfers, _The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness_ , 1 AM. ECON. J: ECON POL'Y 190, 217\u2013224 (2009).\n\n. Nearly as many women as men enter the practice of law, although there is a decreasing entry rate into the profession for women. In 1980 slightly more than one-third of law students (34.2 percent) were women. This number peaked to almost half (49 percent) in 2002 and 2003, but it has dropped to just under 47 percent in the past five years. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION, FIRST YEAR AND TOTAL J.D. ENROLLMENT BY GENDER, 1947\u20132008, http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/legaled\/statistics\/charts\/stats%20-%206.pdf (last visited Feb. 23, 2008).\n\n. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION COMMISSION ON WOMEN, THE 2008 GOAL IX REPORT CARD\u2014AN ANNUAL REPORT ON WOMEN'S ADVANCEMENT INTO LEADERSHIP POSITIONS IN THE ABA, Feb. 2008, at 4.\n\n. DINOVITZER ET AT., _supra_ note 4, at 58.\n\n. MONA HARRINGTON & HELEN HSI, WOMEN LAWYERS AND OBSTACLES TO LEADERSHIP 12 (2007), <http:\/\/web.mit.edu\/workplacecenter\/docs\/law-report_4-07.pdf> _See also_ Theresa M. Beiner, _Not All Lawyers Are Equal: Difficulties That Plague Women and Women of Color_ , 58 SYRACUSE L. REV. 317, 326(2008).\n\n. Monahan & Swanson, _supra_ note 3, at 20, 24, 2.\n\n. Kenneth G. Dau-Schmidt et al., _Men and Women of the Bar: The Impact of Gender on Legal Careers_ , 16 MICH. J. GENDER & L. 49 (2009).\n\n. _Gender or Childcare? Study Sheds Light on Career Roadblocks_ , INDIANA L., Fall 2009, at 3.\n\n. _Id._ (quoting Ken Dau-Schmidt).\n\n. Dau-Schmidt et al., _supra_ note 44, at 72.\n\n. In 2009, 31 percent of all lawyers were women. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION, 2009 NATIONAL LAWYER POPULATION SURVEY, _supra_ note 4. This compares to 30.2 percent in 2006\u20147, and 29.4 percent in 2005\u20146. These percentages were up from 1990 when women comprised 22 percent of the profession and from 2000 when women were 27 percent of lawyers. _See also_ Malaika Costello-Dougherty, _We're Outta Here: Why Women Are Leaving Big Firms_ , CAL. LAW., Feb. 2007, at 20.\n\n. Danielle M. Evans, Note, _Non-equity Partnership: A Flawed Solution to the Disproportionate Advancement of Women in Private Law Firms_ , 28 WOMEN'S RTS. L. REP. 93, 94 (2007). \"By 2000, 'only [sixty-one] percent of the female partners in the National Law Journal's 250 firms [had] equity status, as opposed to almost [seventy-five] percent of the male partners.'\" _Id._ at 94.\n\n. Laura T. Kessler, _Keeping Discrimination Theory Front and Center in the Discourse Over Work and Family Conflict_ , 34 PEPP. L. REV. 313, 316n.17 (2007).\n\n. _See_ AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION, VISIBLE INVISIBILITY: WOMEN OF COLOR IN LAW FIRMS 8\u201310 (2006); Jill Schachner Chanen, _Early Exits: Women of Color at Law Firms Tell ABA Researchers They Are Being Overlooked and Undervalued_ \u2014 _Maybe That's Why They Are Leaving in Droves_ , 92 A.B.A. J 32, 33, 35 (Aug. 2006).\n\n. Eric Swedlund, _Choose Law! Event Targets Would-be Lawyers_ , ARIZ. DAILY STAR, Mar. 3,2007, at B5 (noting that 3.9 percent are African American, 3.3 percent are Hispanic, 2.3 percent are Asian American, and 0.2 percent are Native American).\n\n. DINOVITZER ET AL., _supra_ note 4, at 64.\n\n. _Id._ at 64\u201365.\n\n. More than half of all minorities\u2014male and female\u2014leave within three years. See Wayne J. Lee, Brown v. Board, _Are We There Yet?_ , 51 LA. B.J. 404, 405 (Apr.\/May 2004).; Charles Toutant, _Women, Minorities Make Strides at Firms, But ABA Study Casts Pall_ , 185 N.J.L.J. 653, Aug. 21,2006, at 3; Debra Cassens Weiss, _Survey Reveals the Unhappiest Associates_ , A.B.A. J., Nov. 7,2007, <http:\/\/www.abajournal.com\/news\/survey_reveals_the_unhappiest_associates\/> (last visited Jan. 4, 2008).\n\n. Charles Toutant, _Women, Minorities Make Strides at Firms, But ABA Study Casts Pall_ , 185 N.J.L.J. 653, Aug. 21, 2006, at 3.\n\n. Dinovitzer & Garth, _supra_ note 16, at 12.\n\n### _Chapter 2_\n\n. Carlin Flora, _The Pursuit of Happiness_ , PSYCH. TODAY, Jan.\/Feb. 2009, at 62.\n\n. Ruut Veenhoven, World Database of Happiness, <http:\/\/worlddatabaseofhappiness.eur.nl\/> (last visited July 8, 2009).\n\n. Thinkers in numerous other disciplines, from economists and sociologists to epidemiologists and linguists, are drawing on and adding to these works in science and psychology. See, _e.g._ , BRUNO S. FREY & ALOIS STUTZER, HAPPINESS & ECONOMICS: HOW THE ECONOMY AND INSTITUTIONS AFFECT WELL-BEING (2001); Benedict Carey, _Does a Nation's Mood Lurk in Its Songs and Blogs_ , N.Y. TIMES, Aug. 3, 2009, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2009\/08\/04\/health\/04mind.html>. Our focus is on the fields we think will be most instrumental in leading to happiness for lawyers.\n\n. David M. Buss, _The Evolution of Happiness_ , 55 AM. PSYCHOLOGIST, Jan. 2000, at 15.\n\n. EDUARDO PUNSET, THE HAPPINESS TRIP: A SCIENTIFIC JOURNEY 1(2007).\n\n. _Id._ at 16\u201317.\n\n. _Id._ at 16.\n\n. Susan Viebrock, _World-Renowned Scientist Delves Into Happiness Research_ , TELLURIDE DAILY PLANET, Mar. 27, 2007, <http:\/\/www.telluridegatewaycom\/articles\/2007\/03\/28\/news\/news03.txt>.\n\n. RICHARD LAYARD, HAPPINESS: LESSONS FROM A NEW SCIENCE 17\u201318 (2005).\n\n. JEROME KAGAN, WHAT IS EMOTION? (2007), quoted in Sue M. Halpern, _Are You Happy?_ , 55 N.Y. REV. BOOKS 24 (Apr. 3, 2008), _available at_ <http:\/\/www.nybooks.com\/articles\/21197>.\n\n. Viebrock, _supra_ note 8.\n\n. Natalie Angier, _A Molecule of Motivation, Dopamine Excels at Its Task_ , N.Y. TIMES, Oct. 27, 2009, at DI, D3.\n\n. LAYARD, _supra_ note 9, at 15.\n\n. Marnia Robinson, _Your Brain on Sex, Reuniting: Healing With Sexual Relationships_ , June 25, 2005, www.reuniting.info\/science\/sex_in_the_brain.\n\n. Angier, _supra_ note 12, at D3.\n\n. PUNSET, _supra_ note 5, at 126.\n\n. Natalie Angier, _The Biology Behind the Milk of Human Kindness_ , N.Y. TIMES, Nov. 24, 2009, at D2.\n\n. Viebrock, _supra_ note 8. Viebrock quotes researcher Richard Davidson:\n\nWe discovered that when expert practitioners meditated\u2014and our subjects had between 12,000\u201462,000 hours of meditation each over the course of their lives\u2014there were major, observable changes in the brain, some quite unusual. We saw the production of certain rhythms over extended periods of time, minutes, even hours. In normal individuals, these patterns occur very episodically and last only seconds. What we observed is the brain getting reorganized. We are using these findings to identify long-term end points achievable through intense practice.\n\n_Id._\n\n. Gretchen Reynolds, _Stress Relief: Why Exercise Makes You Less Anxious_ , N.Y. TIMES MAG., NOV. 22, 2009, at 16.\n\n. Of 178 nations ranked for happiness in 2006 by Adrian White, an analytic social psychologist at the University of Leicester in England, Japan came in as the 90th happiest nation, while Canada ranked 10th and the United States 23d. _Canada Scores High on World Happiness Map_ , TORONTO'S CITY NEWS, July 28, 2006, www.citynews.ca\/news\/news_2279.aspx .\n\n. ERICWEINER, THE GEOGRAPHY OF BLISS 310 (2008).\n\n. Sue M. Halpern, _Are You Happy?_ , 55 N.Y. REV. BOOKS, Apr. 3, 2008, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.nybooks.com\/articles\/21197>.\n\n. DANIEL NETTLE, HAPPINESS: THE SCIENCE BEHIND YOUR SMILE 49, 53 (2005).\n\n. Alan Wolfe, _Hedonic Man_ , NEW REPUBLIC, July 9, 2008, at 47.\n\n. David Lykken & Auke Tellegen, _Happiness Is a Stochastic Phenomenon_ , 7 PSYCHOL. SCI. 186 (May 1996), _available at_ <http:\/\/www.psych.umn.edu\/psylabs\/happness\/happyhtm> (\"From 44% to 53% of the variance in [wellbeing], however, is associated with genetic variation. Based on the retest of smaller samples of twins after intervals of 4.5 and 10 years, we estimate that the heritability of the stable component of subjective wellbeing approaches 80%.\").\n\n. _See_ Thomas J. Bouchard, Jr. et al., _Sources of Human Psychological Differences: The Minnesota Study of Twins Reared Apart_ , 250 SCIENCE 223, 250 (Oct. 12, 1990); Auke Tellegen et al., _Personality Similarity in Twins Reared Apart and Together_ , 54 J. PERSONALITY & Soc. PSYCHOL. 1031, 1036 (1988).\n\n. SONJA LYUBOMIRSKY, THE HOW OF HAPPINESS: A NEW APPROACH TO GETTING THE LIFE YOU WANT 21 (2007).\n\n. MICHAEL F. MELCHER, THE CREATIVE LAWYER: A PRACTICAL GUIDE TO AUTHENTIC PROFESSIONAL SATISFACTION 78 (2007).\n\n. _Id._\n\n. Martin E.P. Seligman et al., _Why Lawyers Are Unhappy_ , 23 CARDOZO L. REV. 33,40 (2001).\n\n. WEINER, _supra_ note 21, at 14.\n\n. LYUBOMIRSKY, _supra_ note 27, at 21.\n\n. Jonathan Rottenberg, _State Happiness Rankings Reveal Americans' Happiness Insecurity_ , Psychology Today Blog: Charting the Depths, <http:\/\/www.psychologytoday.com\/blog\/charting-the-depths\/200912\/state-happiness-rankings-reveal-americans-happiness-insecurity> (last visited Dec. 29, 2009).\n\n. Lewis Diuguid, _Survey Says We Can Be in a Happier State, Like Utah_ , K.C. STAR, Dec. 28, 2009, atAi3.\n\n. Carl Bialik, _The Drag of Devising a State-by-State Mirth Meter_ , WALL ST. J., Dec. 23, 2009, at A8. See Andrew J. Oswald & Stephen Wu, _Objective Confirmation of Subjective Measures of Human Well-Being: Evidence from the U.S.A._ , SCIENCE ONLINE, Dec. 17, 2009. <http:\/\/www.sciencemag.org\/cgi\/content\/abstract\/sci;> Science. 118o6o6vi?maxtoshow=& HITS= IO& hits= 10& RESULTFORMAT=& fulltext=andrew+oswald& searchid=I& FIRSTINDEX= 0& resourcetype=HWCIT\n\n. Rottenberg, _supra_ note 33.\n\n. Forty-three percent of people who attend religious services weekly say they are \"very happy\" compared to 26 percent of people who never attend religious services. PEW RESEARCH CENTER PUBLICATIONS, ARE WE HAPPY YET?, Feb. 13, 2006, <http:\/\/pewresearch.org\/pubs\/301\/are-we-happy-yet>.\n\n. Ruut Veenhoven, _Hedonism and Happiness_ , 4 J. HAPPINESS STUD. 437, 452 (2003).\n\n. LAYARD, _supra_ note 9, at 15\u201317.\n\n. See James H. Fowler & Nicholas A. Christakis, _Dynamic Spread of Happiness in a Large Social Network: Longitudinal Analysis Over 20Years in the Framingham Heart Study_ , 337 BRITISH MED. J. 2338 (Dec. 4, 2008).\n\n. LYUBOMIRSKY, _supra_ note 27, at 44.\n\n. _Id._ at 17, quoting Daniel Gilbert.\n\n. LAYARD, _supra_ note 9, at 30.\n\n. Adrian White, _A Global Projection of Subjective Well-Being: The First Published Map of World Happiness_ , 2006, <http:\/\/news.bbc.c0.uk\/2\/shared\/bsp\/hi\/pdfs\/28_07_o6_happiness_map.pdf>. See _also Psychologist Produces the First-Ever \"World Map of Happiness_ , SCIENCE DAILY, NOV. 14, 2006, <http:\/\/www.sciencedaily.com\/releases\/2006\/11\/061113093726.htm>.\n\n. LAYARD, _supra_ note 9, at 69.\n\n. _Id._ at 64.\n\n. _Happiness. What Is It To You?_ , <http:\/\/www.esearch.com\/member\/quiz\/results\/happiness.shtml> (last visited July 12, 2009).\n\n. LYUBOMIRSKY, _supra_ note 27, at 6.\n\n. _Id._ at 20.\n\n. Lawrence S. Krieger, _Psychological Insights: Why Our Students and Graduates Suffer, and What We Might Do About It_ , 1 J. Assoc. LEGAL WRITING DIRECTORS 265 (2002).\n\n. BARRY SCHWARTZ, THE PARADOX OF CHOICE:WHY LESS IS MORE 88 (2004).\n\n. See Jane S. Schacter, _The Gay Civil Rights Debate in the States: Decoding the Discourse of Equivalents_ , 29 HARV. C.R.-C.L. L. REV. 283, 299 (1994).\n\n. DANIEL GILBERT, STUMBLING ON HAPPINESS 33 (2006).\n\n. LYUBOMIRSKY, _supra_ note 27, at 25.\n\n### _Chapter 3_\n\n. TOM W.SMITH, NATIONAL OPINION RESEARCH CENTER\/UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO, JOB SATISFACTION IN THE UNITED STATES (Apr. 17, 2007).\n\n. Sonja Lyubomirsky et al., _The Benefits of Frequent Positive Affect: Does Happiness Lead to Success?_ , 131 PSYCHOL. BULL. 803, 826 (2005).\n\n. _See_ SONJA LYUBOMIRSKY, THE HOW OF HAPPINESS: A NEW APPROACH TO GETTING THE LIFE YOU WANT 128\u201332 (2007); AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION YOUNG LAWYERS DIVISION, ABA YOUNG LAWYERS DIVISION SURVEY: CAREER SATISFACTION 20 (2001), <http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/yld\/satisfaction_800.doc>.\n\n. ABA YOUNG LAWYERS DIVISION SURVEY, _supra_ note 3, at 17.\n\n. Stephanie Francis Ward, _Pulse of the Legal Profession_ , A.B.A. J., Oct. 2007, at 31\u201332.\n\n. ABA YOUNG LAWYERS DIVISION SURVEY, _supra_ note 3, at 31, Table 23.\n\n. Jonathan Foreman, _My Life as an Associate_ , CITY J., Winter 1997, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.city-journal.org\/html\/7_1_a2.html>.\n\n. The practice of law presents other pressures as well. In a \"satisfaction survey\" of Oregon bar members, 54 percent identified time and workload pressures as among the most frustrating aspects of their work, and 47 percent said they worried about making mistakes. Janine Robben, _Burnout_ , 69 OR. ST. B. BULL. 17,18\u201319 (Oct. 2008).\n\n. _See_ National Association for Law Placement, _How Much Do Associates Work?_ , Table 3. Billable Hours Requirements per Year by Firm Size, NALP BULL., Apr. 2009, <http:\/\/www.nalp.org\/may07billablehrs;> Julie A. Oseid, _When Big Brother Is Watching [Out For] You: Mentoring Lawyers, Choosing a Mentor, and Sharing Ten Virtues From My Mentor_ , 59 S.C. L. REV. 393,409 n.84 (2008). _See generally_ JEAN STEPANCIC & RICHARD DELGADO, HOW LAWYERS LOSE THELR WAY: A PROFESSION FAILS ITS CREATIVE MINDS 53 (2005).\n\n. RONIT DINOVITZER ET AL., AFTER THE J.D: FIRST RESULTS OF A NATIONAL STUDY OF LEGAL CAREERS 33 (2004). One study offered estimates of the average number of hours that lawyers spent at work, varying from a high of fifty-three hours per week at a large private law firm to forty-seven for a small private firm, forty-nine for lawyers working in business or finance, and forty-four for government lawyers. John Monahan & Jeffrey Swanson, _Lawyers at Mid-Career: A 20-Year Longitudinal Study of Job and Life Satisfaction_ , 5 J. EMPIRICAL LEGAL STUD, 1, 35 (forthcoming 2009).\n\n. National Association for Law Placement, _supra_ note 9.\n\n. DOUGLAS LITOWITZ, THE DESTRUCTION OF YOUNG LAWYERS: BEYOND ONE L 15 (2005).\n\n. National Association for Law Placement, _Salaries at Largest Firms Up Again_ , Aug. 21, 2008, <http:\/\/www.nalp.org\/salariesatlargestfirmsupagain>.\n\n. Susan Saab Fortney, _The Billable Hours Derby: Empirical Data on the Problems and Pressure Points_ , 33 FORDHAM URB. L.J. 171, 177 (2005).\n\n. William G. Ross, THE HONEST HOUR: THE ETHICS OF TIME-BASED BILLING BY ATTORNEYS 3\u20134 (1996) (quoting Paul Reidinger, _Confessions of The Rodent_ , A.B.A. J., Aug. 1995, at 82, 83).\n\n. Michael Asimow, _Embodiment of Evil: Law Firms in the Movies_ , 48 UCLA L. REV. 1339, 1377 (2001).\n\n. Amy Kolz, _Don't Call Them Slackers_ , AM. LAW., Oct. 3, 2005, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.law.com\/jsp.article.jsp?id=ii278983ii339> (last visited Jan. 3, 2008).\n\n. Patrick J. Schiltz, _On Being a Happy, Healthy and Ethical Member of an Unhappy, Unhealthy, and Unethical Profession_ , 52 VAND. L. REV. 872, 903 (1999).\n\n. _Retaining the Winners_ , NAT'L L.J. 18, Mar. 17, 2008, at 18.\n\n. NATIONAL ASSOCIATION FOR LAW PLACEMENT, KEEPING THE KEEPERS: STRATEGIES FOR ASSOCIATE RETENTION IN TIMES OF ATTRITION (1998), <http:\/\/www.nalpfoundation.org\/webmodules\/articles\/anmviewer.asp?a=6i>. For an elaboration of generational differences, see chapter 6 at notes 10\u201418.\n\n. In response to surveys, \"[j]udges and lawyers both agreed there has been 'a significant increase in instances of incivility\/unprofessionalism in civil litigation in the last decade.'\" Jeffrey A. Parness, _Civility Initiatives:The 2009 Allerton House Conference_ , 96 ILL. B.J. 636, 637 (Dec. 2008). Other evidence of growing incivility documents increased discovery abuses, competition for clients concerns, and disciplinary actions against lawyers. _See_ Melissa S. Hung, _A Non-Trivial Pursuit: The California Attorney Guidelines of Civility and Professionalism_ , 48 SANTA CLARA L. REV. 1127, 1133 (2008).\n\n. Kenneth A. Sprang, _Holistic Jurisprudence: Law Shaped by People of Faith_ , 74 ST. JOHN'S L. REV. 753, 758 n.30 (2000).\n\n. Lilia M. Cortina et al., _What's Gender Got To Do With It? Incivility in the Federal Courts_ , 27 LAW & Soc. INQUIRY 235, 235 (2002).\n\n. Christopher J. Piazzola, Comment, _Ethical Versus Procedural Approaches to Civility: Why Ethics 2000 Should Have Adopted a Civility Rule_ , 74 U. COLO. L. REV. 1197, H99n.i4 (2003);Ward, _supra_ note 5, at 31.\n\n. Thomas M. Reavley, _Rambo Litigators: Pitting Aggressive Tactics Against Legal Ethics_ , 17 PEPP. L. REV. 637, 638 (1990).\n\n. Joseph J. Ortego & Lindsay Maleson, _Under Attack: Professionalism in the Practice of Law_ , Mar. 20, 2003, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.nixonpeabody.com\/publications_detail3.asp?ID=303#refi9>.\n\n. <http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=td-KKmcYtrM>.\n\n. Marc S. Galanter & Thomas M. Palay, _Large Law Firm Misery:It's the Tournament, Not the Money_ , 52 VAND. L. REV. 953, 960 (1999).\n\n. David Guenther, _To Be or Not Be a Lawyer, That Is the Question_ , 2001, <http:\/\/www.100megsfree3.com\/wordsmith\/2bornoti.html>.\n\n. Douglas R. Richmond, _Law Firm Partners as Their Brothers' Keepers_ , 96 KY. L.J. 231,263 (2007\u201308).\n\n. THE GALLUP POLL, HONESTY\/ETHICS IN PROFESSIONS (2007), _available at_ http:\/\/www.galluppoll.com\/content\/?ci=1654&pg=1.\n\n. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION SECTION OF LITIGATION, PUBLIC PERCEPTIONS OF LAWYERS: CONSUMER RESEARCH FINDINGS 7\u20138 (2002), http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/litigation\/lawyers\/publicperceptions.pdf.\n\n. Michael Asimow, _Bad Lawyers in the Movies_ , 24 NOVA L. REV. 533, 537 (2000).\n\n. ANDREW MCCLURG, FIGHT CLUB: DOCTORS VS. LAWYERS\u2014THE RIVALRY BETWEEN AMERICA'S MOST REVERED, REVILED, AND MISUNDERSTOOD PROFESSIONS (forthcoming 2011, manuscript on file with authors).\n\n. Margaret Raymond, _On Legalistic Behavior, the Advocacy Privilege, and Why People Hate Lawyers_ , 55 BUFF. L. REV. 929, 930 (2007).\n\n. ANTHONY J. LUPPINO, CAN DO:TRAINING LAWYERS TO BE EFFECTIVE COUNSELORS TO ENTREPRENEURS, REPORT TO THE EWING MARION KAUFFMAN FOUNDATION, Jan. 30, 2008, at 6, <http:\/\/papers.ssrn.com\/s0l3\/papers.cfm?abstract_id=1157065>.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. Arthur Gross Schaefer & Leland Swenson, _Contrasting the Vision and the Reality: Core Ethical Values, Ethics Audit and Ethics Decision Models for Attorneys_ , 32 PEPP. L. REV. 459, 459 (2005).\n\n. Stephen D. Easton, _My Last Lecture: Unsolicited Advice for Future and Current Lawyers_ , 56 S.C. L. REV. 229, 244 (2004).\n\n. Charles Silver & Frank B. Cross, _What's Not to Like About Being a Lawyer?_ , 109 YALE L.J. 1443, 1476^77 (2000).\n\n. Frank B. Cross, _The First Thing We Do, Let's Kill All the Economists: An Empirical Evaluation of the Effect of Lawyers on the United States Economy and Political System_ , 70 TEX. L. REV. 645, 678 (1992).\n\n. Legal Underground, Feb. 14, 2005, <http:\/\/www.legalunderground.com\/2005\/02\/what_do_you_lik.html>.\n\n. Andrew Schepard & Theo Liebmann, _Law and Children_ , 235 N.Y.L.J., Jan. 18, 2006, at 3.\n\n. Guenther, _supra_ note 29.\n\n. Martin Luther King, _Where Do We Go From Here?_ , Aug. 16, 1967, <http:\/\/www.indiana.edu\/~ivieweb\/mlkwhere.html>.\n\n. Ward, _supra_ note 5, at 32.\n\n. Joshua Wolf Shenk, _What Makes Us Happy?_ , ATLANTIC, June 2009, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.theatlantic.com\/doc\/200906\/happiness>.\n\n. Monahan & Swanson, _supra_ note 10, at 2.\n\n. _Id._ at 22.\n\n. BARRY SCHWARTZ, THE PARADOX OF CHOICE: WHY LESS IS MORE 104, in (2004).\n\n. Pew Research Center, _Are We Happy Yet?_ , Feb. 13, 2006, <http:\/\/pewresearch.org\/pubs\/301\/are-we-happy-yet>.\n\n. DANIEL NETTLE, HAPPINESS: THE SCIENCE BEHIND YOUR SMILE 73\u201374 (2005).\n\n. Patrick Radden Keefe, _White Shoe, Black Hat: Michael Clayton's Devastating Critique of the Legal Profession_ , SLATE, Feb. 19, 2008, <http:\/\/www.slate.com\/id\/2184068\/>.\n\n. _See_ SUSAN SWAIM DAICOPP, LAWYER, KNOW THYSELF, A PSYCHOLOGICAL ANALYSIS OF PERSONALITY STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES 41 (2004).\n\n. _See, e.g._ , Don Peters & Martha M. Peters, _Maybe That's Why I Do That: Psychological Type Theory, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, and Learning Legal Interviewing_ , 35 N.Y.L. SCH. L. REV. 169, 169 (1990).\n\n. Susan Daicoff _Asking Leopards to Change Their Spots: Should Lawyers Change? A Critique of Solutions to Problems with Professionalism by Referenceto Empirically-Derived Attorney Personality Attributes_, 11 GEO. J. LEGAL ETHICS 547, 587\u201388, 595 (1998).\n\n. The \"lawyer personality\" is itself a category in the Myers-Briggs personality inventory. Based on the standard categorization of personality types, lawyers are much more inclined that the general public to be \"Thinkers\" (versus \"Feelers\"), \"Introverts\" (versus \"Extroverts\"), and \"Intuiting\" types (versus \"Sensing\" types). For example, 66 percent of all female lawyers are \"Thinking\" types compared to only 35 percent of women generally. (Male lawyers are even more likely to be \"Thinking\" types, with 81 percent getting that label, based on survey results.) On the Extroversion-Introversion scale, a full three-quarters of the general population turn out to be \"Extroverts\" compared to just 43 percent of lawyers. Finally, on the Sensing-Intuiting scale, 70 percent of lawyers score as \"Intuiting\" types, while in the general population, the percentages are exactly the reverse. (Intuiting types are considered to be past or future-oriented, impatient with the routine, doubt-ridden, and attracted more to the theoretical than the practical.) On only one of the standard personality scales, \"Perceiving\" types versus \"Judging\" types, do lawyers generally reflect percentages found in the population as a whole. MICHAEL MELCHER, THE CREATIVE LAWYER: A PRACTICAL GUIDE TO AUTHENTIC PROFESSIONAL SATISFACTION _76\u201379_ (American Bar Association, 2007).\n\n. Martin E.P. Seligman et al., _Why Lawyers Are Unhappy_ , 23 CARDOZO L. REV. 33, 34 (2001).\n\n. Catherine Gage O'Grady, _Cognitive Optimism and Professional Pessimism in the Large-Firm Practice of Law: The Optimistic Associate_ , 30 LAW & PSYCHOL. REV. 23, 37\u201338 (2006).\n\n. Seligman et al., _supra_ note 58, at 41.\n\n. Lawrence S. Krieger, _The Inseparability of Professionalism and Personal Satisfaction: Perspectives on Values, Integrity and Happiness_ , 11 CLINICAL L. REV. 425, 433,434 (2005).\n\n. Douglas O. Linder, _Who Is Clarence Darrow?_ , <http:\/\/www.law.umkc.edu\/faculty\/projects\/ftrials\/DARESY.htm> (last visited Aug. 11, 2009).\n\n. Alice Park, _A Primer for Pessimists_ , TIME, Apr. 6, 2009, at WI (quoting Martin Seligman).\n\n### _Chapter 4_\n\n. EDUARDO PUNSET, THE HAPPINESS TRIP: A SCIENTIFIC JOURNEY 55 (2007).\n\n. _Id._ at 56.\n\n. William W. Eaton et al., _Occupations and the Prevalence of Major Depressive Disorder_ , 32 J. OCCUPATIONAL MED. 1079,1083 (1990).\n\n. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION YOUNG LAWYERS DIVISION, TABLE 23, ABA YOUNG LAWYERS DIVISION SURVEY: CAREER SATISFACTION 31 (2001), <http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/yld\/satisfaction_800.doc>.\n\n. _Id._ at 22.\n\n. Peter Warr, _Jobs and Happiness_ , SOCIETY FOR INDUSTRIAL & ORGANIZATIONAL PSYCHOLOGY, INC., Jan. 2007, <http:\/\/www.siop.org\/tip\/Current\/04warr.aspx>.\n\n. DANIEL GILBERT, STUMBLING ON HAPPINESS 23 (2006).\n\n. PUNSET, _supra_ note 1, at 78.\n\n. Stephanie Francis Ward, _Pulse of the Legal Profession: 800 Lawyers Reveal What They Think About Their Lives, Their Careers and the State of the Legal Profession_ , 93 A.B.A. J. 30, 34 (Oct. 2007).\n\n. Ross Gittins, _Happiness Is the Job You Like_ , SYDNEY MORNING HERALD, Mar. 10, 2004, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.smh.com.au\/articles\/2004\/03\/09\/1078594359806.html?from=storyrhs>.\n\n. INTERNATIONAL LABOUR ORGANIZATION, KEY INDICATORS OF THE LABOUR MARKET PROGRAMME 6, 10, <http:\/\/www.ilo.org\/public\/english\/employment\/strat\/kilm\/download\/kilmo6.pdf> (last visited July 9, 2009).\n\n. JEROME KAGAN, WHAT IS EMOTION? (2007), quoted in Sue M. Halpern, _Are You Happy?_ , 55 N.Y. REV. BOOKS 24 (Apr. 3, 2008), _available_ at <http:\/\/www.nybooks.com\/articles\/21197>.\n\n. DANIEL NETTLE, HAPPINESS:THE SCIENCE BEHIND YOUR SMILE 38 (2005).\n\n. American Public Media, _Bhutan's Falling Happiness Index_ , Nov. 14, 2007, <http:\/\/marketplace.publicradio.org\/display\/web\/2007\/11\/14\/consumed5_mmr_1\/>.\n\n. According to a recent study, 96 percent of people in the highest social class report being in control of their lives, compared to 81 percent in the lowest social class. NETTLE, _supra_ note 13, at 73\u201474.\n\n. ERICWEINER, THE GEOGRAPHY OF BLISS 251 (2008).\n\n. RICHARD LAYARD, HAPPINESS: LESSONS FROM A NEW SCIENCE 40 (2005). Richard Wilkinson and Kate Pickett amass substantial evidence that societies with greater economic and political equality have healthier and happier citizens. RICHARD WILKINSON & KATE PICKETT, THE SPIRIT LEVEL: WHY MORE EQUAL SOCIETIES ALMOST ALWAYS DO BETTER (2009).\n\n. SONJA LYUBOMIRSKY, THE HOW OF HAPPINESS: A NEW APPROACH TO GETTING THE LIFE YOU WANT 116 (2007).\n\n. WEINER, _supra_ note 16, at 114.\n\n. LAYARD, _supra_ note 17, at 16.\n\n. Warr, _supra_ note 6.\n\n. _Id._ at 15.\n\n. TOM W. SMITH, JOB SATISFACTION IN THE UNITED STATES (Apr. 17, 2007) (National Opinion Research Center, University of Chicago study).\n\n. Barbara Rose, _Money Can't Buy Happiness, Study Finds_ , CHI. TRIB., Apr. 17, 2007.\n\n. GILBERT, _supra_ note 7, at 166.\n\n. ROBERT PUTNAM, BOWLING ALONE: THE COLLAPSE AND REVIVAT OF AMERICAN COMMUNITY (2001).\n\n. LYUBOMIRSKY, _supra_ note 18, at 64, 89\u2013101.\n\n. Ward, _supra_ note 9, at 33.\n\n. Physorg.com, _First Ever World Map of Happiness Produced_ , <http:\/\/www.physorg.com\/news73321785.html>, July 28, 2006. Austria ranked third, followed by Iceland. The United States ranked 23d.\n\n. WEINER, _supra_ note 16, at 318.\n\n. Leslie A. Gordon, _Mid-Career Malaise: How to Find a New Path for Your 40s_ , A.B.A. J., Sept. 2008, at 38, 40.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. Debra Cassens Weiss, _Long Hours and Hard Work Took a Toll on Sotomayor's Relationships_ , A.B.A. J., July 10, 2009, _available at_ <http:\/\/abajournal.com\/news\/long_hours_and_hard_work_took_a_toll_on_sotomayors_relationships>.\n\n. TAL BEN SHAHAR, THE QUESTION OF HAPPINESS : ON FINDING MEANING, PLEASURE, AND THE ULTIMATE CURRENCY 46 (2002) (quoting Csikszentmihalyi).\n\n. MlHATYI CSIKSZENTMIHALYI, FINDING FLOW: THE PSYCHOTOGY OF ENGAGEMENT WITH EVERYDAY LIFE 29 (1997).\n\n. David Achtenberg, interview, Jan. 29, 2009.\n\n. _See generally_ CSIKSZENTMIHALYI, _supra_ note 35; MIHALYI CSIKSZENTMIHALYI, FLOW: THE PSYCHOLOGY OF OPTIMAL EXPERIENCE (1990).\n\n. GILBERT, _supra_ note 7, at 111^71, 212\u201333.\n\n. LAYARD, _supra_ note 17, at 48\u201349.\n\n. WEINER, _supra_ note 16, at 310.\n\n. Penelope Trunk, Brazen Careerist, <http:\/\/blog.penelopetrunk.com\/2006\/05\/15\/forget-the-soul-search-just-do-something> (May 15, 2006).\n\n. Daniel T. Gilbert et al., _The Surprising Power of Neighborly Advice_ , 323 SCIENCE 1617, 1618 (Mar. 20, 2009).\n\n. Trunk, _supra_ note 41, citing Daniel Gilbert.\n\n. _See_ Michael A. Cohn et al., _Happiness Unpacked: Positive Emotions Increase Life Satisfaction by Building Resilience_ , 9 J. EMOTION 361 (2009); _Smallest Joys Add Up to a Lot_ , K.C. STAR, July 12, 2009, at An.\n\n. LYUBOMIRSKY, _supra_ note 18, at 194.\n\n. BEN SHAHAR, _supra_ note 34, at 54\u201357.\n\n. _See_ MARTEN E.P. SELIGMAN, AUTHENTIC HAPPINESS: USING THE NEW POSITIVE PSYCHOLOGY TO REALIZEYOUR POTENTIAT FOR LASTENG FULFILLMENT (2002).\n\n. JEAN STEPANCIC & RICHARD DELGADO, HOW LAWYERS LOSE THEIR WAY: A PROFESSION FAILS ITS CREATIVE MINDS 14\u201315 (2005).\n\n. Deborah Rhode, _Foreword: Personal Satisfaction in Professional Practice_ , 58 SYRACUSE L. REV. 217, 224 (2008).\n\n. Ward, _supra_ note 9, at 33 (68 percent of public sector lawyers polled said they \"were satisfied with their professional lives.\").\n\n. PUNSET, _supra_ note 1, at 41.\n\n. Unfortunately, however, pro bono opportunities in most workplaces are very limited these days. One half of all attorneys report being dissatisfied with pro bono opportunities offered by their firms, and actual pro bono work averages less than thirty minutes per week. Rhode, _supra_ note 49, at 225. Only a quarter of lawyers say that their firms fully count pro bono work toward billable hours and about two-thirds believe that pro bono work will not help, or is more likely to hurt, their prospects for promotion or increased compensation. _Id._ at 226. Profits rule at most firms\u2014and the drive for ever higher profits (to pay ever higher salaries) has taken its toll on pro bono activity. The failure of firms to place a high priority on pro bono work is unfortunate.\n\n. _Id._ at 233.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. Penelope Trunk, Brazen Careerist, <http:\/\/blog.penelopetrunk.com\/2007\/01\/16\/the-connection-between-a-good-job-and-happiness-is-overrated> (fan. 16, 2007).\n\n. Erica Goode, _Exploring Life at the Top of the Happiness Scale_ , N.Y. TIMES, Jan. 29, 2002, at F6.\n\n### _Chapter 5_\n\n. _See, e.g._ , ANDREW MCCLURG, IL OF A RIDE: A WELL-TRAVELED PROFESSOR'S ROADMAP TO SUCCESS IN THE FIRST YEAR OF LAW SCHOOL (2008); HELENE SHAPO & MARSHALL SHAPO, LAW SCHOOL WITHOUT FEAR: STRATEGIES FOR SUCCESS (2d ed. 2002).\n\n. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION, ENROLLMENT AND DEGREES AWARDED 1963\u20142008, <http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/legaled\/statistics\/charts\/statspercent20-percent201.pdf>. In that same time frame about 5,000 first year students left law school each year; approximately 1,400 left law school during their second year, and about 300 left during their third year. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION, TOTAL J.D ATTRITION 1981\u20132006, <http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/legaled\/statistics\/charts\/stats%20-%2017.pdf>. These attrition rates include students who left voluntarily, flunked out, and transferred to another school. The numbers may say more about a school's admissions and retention practices than individuals' choices. In 2005 six law schools had attrition rates for first years above 30 percent. Debra Cassens Weiss, _lL Attrition Topped 30 Percent at Six haw Schools_ , A.B.A. J., Apr. 25, 2008, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.abajournal.com\/news\/1l_attrition_topped_30_percent_at_six_law_schools>.\n\n. Deborah Rhode, _Personal Satisfaction in Professional Practice_ , 58 SYRACUSE L. REV. 217, 223 (2008).\n\n. Allen K. Rostron, _Lawyers, haw & the Movies: The Hitchcock Cases_, 86 CAL. L. REV. 211,214 (1998).\n\n. People who engage with and care about other people report greater satisfaction over their life span. Nisha C. Gottfredson et al., _Identifying Predictors of Law Student Life Satisfaction_ , 58 J. LEGAL EDUC. 520 (Dec. 2008).\n\n. _Id._\n\n. Barbara Glesner Fines, interview, Apr. 21, 2009.\n\n. GARY A. MUNNEKE ET AL., NONLEGAL CAREERS FOR LAWYERS 3\u20134 (5th ed. 2006).\n\n. GARY A. MUNNEKE, THE LEGAL CAREER GUIDE: FROM LAW STUDENT TO LAWYER 5 (4th ed. 2002).\n\n. NICHOLAS A. CHRISTAKIS & JAMES H. FOWLER, CONNECTED: THE SURPRISING POWER OF OUR SOCIAL NETWORKS AND HOW THEY SHAPE OUR LIVES (2009).\n\n. Graduates of fourth-tier law schools are happier (43 percent are extremely satisfied) than graduates of elite law schools \"working in the most prestigious settings\"\u2014who are the least likely to report being extremely satisfied (24 percent) \"with their decision to become a lawyer.\" Ronit Dinovitzer & Bryant G. Garth, _Lawyer Satisfaction in the Process of Structuring Legal Careers_ , 41 LAW & SOC'Y REV. 1,25 (2007).\n\n. LAW SCHOOL SURVEY OF STUDENT ENGAGEMENT, STUDENT ENGAGEMENT IN LAW SCHOOL: PREPARING 2IST CENTURY LAWYERS (2008), <http:\/\/lssse.iub.edu\/2008_Annual_Report\/pdf\/J4u5h7e9\/LSSSE_2008_Annual_Report.pdf> [hereinafter LSSSE].\n\n. _Princeton Review's Best 174 Law Schools_ , Tax Prof Blog, <http:\/\/taxprof.type-pad.com\/taxprof_blog\/2008\/10\/princeton-revie.html> (Oct. 20, 2008).\n\n. _See_ LSSSE, _supra_ note 12, at 11\u201414.\n\n. _See_ Lawrence S. Krieger, _Human Nature as a New Guiding Philosophy for Legal Education and the Profession_ , 47 WASHBURN L.J. 247, 264 (2008).\n\n. Susan Sturm & Lani Guinier, _The Law School Matrix: Reforming Legal Education in a Culture of Competition and Conformity_ , 60 VAND. L. REV. 515, 532\u201433 (2007).\n\n. _See_ Patrick J. Schiltz, _Making Ethical Lawyers_ , 45 S. TEX. L. REV. 875, 879\u201385 (2004).\n\n. LAW SCHOOL SURVEY OF STUDENT ENGAGEMENT, ENGAGING LEGAL EDUCATION: MOVING BEYOND THE STATUS QUO 8, 13 (2006), <http:\/\/lssse.iub.edu\/2006_Annual_Report\/pdf\/LSSSE_2006_Annual_Report.pdf>.\n\n. Denise Riebe, _A Bar Review for Law Schools: Getting Students on Board to Pass Their Bar Exams_ , 45 BRANDEIS L.J. 269, 331 (2007).\n\n. _See_ Brigette LuAnn Willauer, Comment, _The Law School Honor Code and Collaborative Learning: Can They Coexist?_ , 73 UMKC L. REV. 513, 525\u201434 (2004).\n\n. Anthony J. Luppino, _Minding More Than Our Own Business: Educating Entrepreneurial Lawyers Through Law School-Business School Collaborations_ , 30 W. NEW ENG. L. REV. 151,166 (2007).\n\n. _See, e.g._ , Janet Weinstein & Linda Morton, _Interdisciplinary Problem Solving Courses as a Context for Nurturing Intrinsic Values_ , 13 CLINICAL L. REV. 839, 846 (2007).\n\n. Luppino, _supra_ note 21, at 178\u201486.\n\n. _The Endangered Trial Lawyer_ , 95 A.B.A. J. 63 (Mar. 2009).\n\n. PAULINE H. TESLER, COLLABORATIVE LAW: ACHIEVING EFFECTIVE RESOLUTION IN DIVORCE WITHOUT LITIGATION xx-xxi (2001).\n\n. Susan Grover, _Personal Integration and Outsider Status as Factors in Law Student Well-Being_ , 47 WASHBURN L.J. 419, 427 (2008).\n\n. Paula Lustbader, _You Are Not in Kansas Anymore: Orientation Programs Can Help Students Fly Over the Rainbow_ , 47 WASHBURN L.J. 327, 350 (2008).\n\n. Christine Hurt, _No Harm Intended_ , CHRON. HIGHER EDUC., May 25, 2005, _available at_ <http:\/\/chronicle.com\/jobs\/news\/2005\/05\/2005052501c.htm>.\n\n. _See_ Michael Hunter Schwartz, _Humanizing Legal Education: An Introduction to a Symposium Whose Time Has Come_ , 47 WASHBURN L.J. 235 (2008).\n\n. American Bar Association, _Alphabetical School List_ , <http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/legaled\/approvedlawschools\/alpha.html> (last visited Mar. 25, 2009). We are indebted to Lawrence MacLachlan for conducting this survey.\n\n. Lewis & Clark's \"Lawyering in Society,\" Temple's \"Law, Happiness, & Subjective Well-Being,\" the University of California at Berkeley's \"Effective and Sustainable Law Practice: the Meditative Perspective,\" the University of Missouri-Kansas City's \"Quest for a Satisfying Career in Law,\" the University of Virginia's \"Legal Careers and Life Satisfaction, and Yale's \"Happiness and Morality.\" _See_ Peter H. Huang & Rick Swedloff, _Authentic Happiness & Meaning at Law Firms_, 58 SYRACUSE L. REV. 335, 346\u201347 (2008).\n\n. _See, e.g._ , DANIEL GILBERT, STUMBLING ON HAPPINESS (2006); Daniel Kahneman et al., _Would You Be Happier If You Were Richer? A Focusing Illusion_ , 312 SCIENCE 1908 (June 30, 2006); Barry Schwartz & Andrew Ward et al., _Maximizing Versus Satisficing: Happiness Is a Matter of Choice_ , 83 J. PERSONALITY & Soc. PSYCHOL. 1178 (2002).\n\n. Doug Linder & Nancy Levit, _The Quest for a Satisfying Career in Law_ , Spring 2009, <http:\/\/www.law.umkc.edu\/faculty\/projects\/ftrials\/happylawyers\/Questions.html>.\n\n. Doug Linder, _Searching for Law's Heroes_ , 2001, <http:\/\/www.law.umkc.edu\/faculty\/projects\/ftrials\/trialheroes\/HEROSEARCH1.html>.\n\n. Doug Linder, _Does the Law Have Heroes?_ , 2001, <http:\/\/www.law.umkc.edu\/faculty\/projects\/ftrials\/trialheroes\/HEROSEARCH4.html>.\n\n. Boston College, _Law School Personal Statement_ , <http:\/\/www.bc.edu\/offices\/careers\/gradschool\/law\/lawstatement.html> (last visited Mar. 3, 2010).\n\n. WILLIAM H. COLBY, UNPLUGGED: RECLAIMING OUR RIGHT TO DIE IN AMERICA 109, 114 (2006). Lawyer Bill Colby created this term in another context, but it refers to a phenomenon of institutions creating structures that route people in prescribed directions.\n\n. Daisy Hurst Floyd, _Lost Opportunity: Legal Education and the Development of Professional Identity_ , 30 HAMLINE L. REV. 555, 562 (2007).\n\n. HARRY LEWIS, EXCELLENCE WITHOUT A SOUL: HOW A GREAT UNIVERSITY FORGOT EDUCATION 12\u201314, 140 (2005).\n\n. _See_ Luppino, _supra_ note 21, at 194.\n\n. LAWRENCE S. KRIEGER, THE HIDDEN SOURCES OF LAW SCHOOL STRESS: AVOIDING THE MISTAKES THAT CREATE UNHAPPY AND UNPROFESSIONAL LAWYERS 5 (2006), _available at_ <http:\/\/www.law.fsu.edu\/academic_programs\/humanizing_lawschool\/images\/E.pdf>\n\n. Pierre Schlag, _Hiding the Ball_ , 71 N.Y.U.L. REV. 1681, 1683 (1996).\n\n. Paul J. Zak & Ahlam Fakhar, _Neuroactive Hormones and Interpersonal Trust: International Evidence_ , 4 ECON.& HUM. BIOLOGY 412 (Dec. 2006).\n\n. Schwartz, _supra_ note 29, at 241 n.43 (This game \"involves assigning bingo squares to students who engage themselves in classroom discussions and then playing according to the normal bingo rules as those students participate in class.\").\n\n. Jess M. Krannich et al., _Beyond \"Thinking Like a Lawyer\" and the Traditional Legal Paradigm:Toward a Comprehensive View of Legal Education_ , 86 DENV. U.L. REV. 381, 385 (2009).\n\n. BARBARA GLESNER FINES, LAW SCHOOL AND STRESS (1999), <http:\/\/www.law.umkc.edu\/faculty\/profiles\/glesnerfines\/bgf-strs.htm>.\n\n. Gerald F. Hess, _Heads and Hearts: The Teaching and Learning Environment in Law School_ , 52 J. LEGAL EDUC. 75, 77 (2002).\n\n. A 1993 Association of American Law Schools survey of almost 3,400 students at nineteen law schools showed that 8.2 percent had used marijuana in the previous month, 8.8 percent had used some form of illicit drug, and 14 percent had drunk alcohol ten or more times in the previous month; during the previous year, 20.8 percent reported use of marijuana and 4.8 percent had used cocaine. _Report of theAALS Special Committee on Problems of Substance Abuse in the Law Schools_ , 44 J. LEGAL EDUC. 35, 41 (1994).\n\n. Intriguingly, while medical students suffered some similar symptoms of depression and anxiety, they did so at about half the rate of law students. Connie J.A. Beck et al., _Lawyer Distress: Alcohol-Related Problems and Other Psychological Concerns Among a Sample of Practicing Lawyers_ , 10 J.L. & HEALTH 1 (1995\u201396).\n\n. Susan Daicoff, _Lawyer, Know Thyself: A Review of Empirical Research on Attorney Attributes Bearing on Professionalism_ , 46 AM. U. L. REV. 1337, 1341\u201350 (1997).\n\n. Kennon M. Sheldon & Lawrence S. Krieger, _Does Legal Education Have Undermining Effects on Law Students? Evaluating Changes in Motivation, Values, and Well-Being_ , 22 BEHAV. SCI. L. 261, 264 (2004).\n\n. KRIEGER, _supra_ note 41, at 3 (emphasis in original).\n\n. INDIANA UNIVERSITY CENTER FOR POSTSECONDARY RESEARCH, LAW SCHOOL SURVEY OF STUDENT ENGAGEMENT: LAW SCHOOL REPORT 2007, OVERVIEW 7 (2007), _available at_ http:\/\/lssse.iub.edu\/pdf\/LSSSE%202007%20Overview_FINAL%20(PDF).pdf..pdf)\n\n. Peter F. Lake, _When Fear Knocks: The Myths and Realities of Law School_ , 29 STETSON L. REV. 1015, 1034 (2000).\n\n. James H. Backman, _Practical Examples for Establishing an Externship Program Available to Every Student_ , 14 CLINICAL L. REV. I, 4n.i6 (2007) (listing only eight law schools that do not have an in-house clinic).\n\n. Mitu Gulati et al., _The Happy Charade: An Empirical Examination of the Third Year of Law School_ , 51 J. LEGAL EDUC.235, 249 (2001).\n\n. Jonathan D. Rowe, _\"It Gets Late Early Out There\": Yogi Berra Tours the Law Schools_ , 77 MICH. B.J. 664, _666_ (1998).\n\n. KRIEGER, _supra_ note 41, at 4.\n\n. Nisha C. Gottfredson et al., _Identifying Predictors of Law Student Life Satisfaction_ , 58 J. LEGAL EDUC.520, 527 (2008). _See also_ Dinovitzer & Garth, _supra_ note 11, at 25.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. _See_ Sheldon & Krieger, _supra_ note 51.\n\n. _See_ Susan Daicoff, _Lawyer, Be Thyself: An Empirical Investigation of the Relationship Between the Ethic of Care, the Feeling Decisionmaking Preference, and Lawyer Wellbeing_ , 16 VA. J. Soc. POL'Y & L. 87, 133 (2008).\n\n. Michael Hunter Schwartz, _Teaching Law Students to Be Self-Regulated Learners_ , 2003 MICH. ST. DCL L. REV.447, 481\u201383.\n\n. _See, e.g._ , Edwin S. Shneidman, _Personality and \"Success\" Among a Selected Group of Lawyers_ , 48 J. PERSONALITY ASSESSMENT 609, 613\u201315 (1984).\n\n. Celestial S.D. Cassman & Lisa R. Pruitt, _A Kinder, Gentler Law School? Race, Ethnicity, Gender, and Legal Education at King Hall_ , 38 U.C. DAVIS L. REV.1209, 1263\u201364 (2005).\n\n. Gregory Bowman, _The Comparative and Absolute Advantages of Junior Law Faculty: Implications for Teaching and the Future of American Law Schools_ , 2008 B.Y.U. EDUC. & LJ. 171, 188.\n\n. Tan N. Nguyen, _An Affair to Forget: Law School's Deleterious Effect on Students' Public Interest Aspirations_ , 7 CONN. PUB. IN. LJ. 251, 252\u201352 (2008).\n\n. _Id._ at 257, 259\u201360.\n\n. AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION, LAW SCHOOL TUITION, http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/legaled\/statistics\/charts\/stats%20-%205.pdf (last visited Aug. 8, 2008).\n\n. Kathy Kristof, _The Great College Hoax_ , FORBES, Feb. 2, 2009, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.forbes.com\/magazines\/forbes\/2009\/0202\/060.html>\n\n. _The End of an Era: The Bi-Modal Distribution for the Class of 2008_ , Empirical Legal Studies, at <http:\/\/www.elsblog.org\/the_empirical_legal_studi\/2009\/06\/the-end-of-an-era-the-bimodal-distribution-for-the-class-of-2008.html> (June 29, 2009) (based on more than 22,300 recent graduates\u2014\"over half of all 2008 graduates\"\u2014who reported their starting salaries). This chart is copyrighted by the National Association for Law Placement (NALP) and reprinted with permission.\n\n. _Id._ You can easily find websites to research the starting salaries at individual firms in various locations, <http:\/\/www.infirmation.com\/shared\/search\/scored-search>.\n\n. National Association for Law Placement, _How Much Do Law Firms Pay New Associates? A 12-Year Retrospective as Reported by Firms_ , Oct. 2007, Table 1. Median Starting Salaries for First-Year Associates by Firm Size, Table 3, Median Starting Salaries for Selected Non-Firm Lawyer Jobs, <http:\/\/www.nalp.org\/2007octnewassocpay>\n\n. The states are: Arizona, Florida, Indiana, Kentucky, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Missouri, Montana, New Hampshire, New Mexico, New York, North Carolina, Texas, and Washington.\n\n. Equal Justice Works, _State LRAPs_ , <http:\/\/www.equaljusticeworks.org\/node\/71>. Three states, Kentucky, Maine, and New Hampshire, have no income cap.\n\n. Equal Justice Works, _Law Schools With LRAPS_ , <http:\/\/www.equaljustice-works.org\/node\/66>\n\n. One provides state and local prosecutors and public defenders with $10,000 per year for a three year commitment. Another offers civil legal aid lawyers $6,000 for each year of a renewable three-year commitment (up to a maximum of $40,000). The third will give $2,000 per year (up to a maximum of $10,000) to public interest lawyers (including prosecutors, public defenders, and lawyers in low-income communities who work at nonprofit organizations). The fourth is a loan cancellation program which offers partial loan forgiveness for certain public service jobs. Equal Justice Works, _New Resource: Higher Education Reauthorization and College Opportunity Act 0\/2008_ , <http:\/\/www.equaljusticeworks.org\/node\/421>\n\n. IBRinfo, _What Are These New Programs?_ , <http:\/\/www.ibrinfo.org\/what.vp.html> (last visited Jan. 26, 2009).\n\n. DANIEL NETTLE, HAPPINESS: THE SCIENCE BEHIND YOUR SMILE 152 (2005).\n\n. MUNNEKE, _supra_ note 8, at 4.\n\n. EDUARDO PUNSET, THE HAPPINESS TRIP: A SCIENTIFIC JOURNEY 54 (2007).\n\n. Nguyen, _supra_ note 67, at 257\u201460.\n\n. David Hricik & Victoria S. Salzmann, _Why There Should Be Fewer Articles Like This One: Law Professors Should Write More for Legal Decision-Makers and Less for Themselves_ , 38 SUFFOLK U. L. REV.761, 769 (2005).\n\n. Joshua J.A. Henderson & Trevor C.W. Farrow, _The Ethical Development of Law Students: An Empirical Study_ , 72 SASK. L. REV.75, 98n.8o (2009).\n\n. Michael Sauder & Wendy Nelson Espeland, _Strength in Numbers? The Advantages of Multiple Rankings_ , 81 IND. L.J. 205, 211 (2006).\n\n. Dinovitzer & Garth, _supra_ note 11, at 4.\n\n. One survey of almost 19,000 associates asked them to rank firms along various dimensions, such as prestige, diversity, and quality of life (including measures such as hours and compensation, but also formal and informal training, and treatment by partners). Vault, _Top 100 Law Firms, 2009 Rankings_ , http:\/\/www.vault.com\/nr\/lawrankings.jsp?law2009=i&ch_id=242.\n\n. Judged, <http:\/\/www.judged.com\/jdfirmrankings.php> (last visited July 21, 2009).\n\n. _See_ BARRY NALEBUFF & IAN AYRES, WHY NOT? HOW TO USE EVERYDAY INGENUITY TO SOLVE PROBLEMS BIG AND SMALL (2003).\n\n. BARRY SCHWARTZ, THE PARADOX OF CHOICE: WHY LESS IS MORE 77\u201396 (2004).\n\n. _Id._ at 104.\n\n. _Id._ at 25.\n\n. _Id._ at 4.\n\n. _Id._ at 62; Barry Schwartz & Andrew Ward et al., _Maximizing Versus Satisficing: Happiness Is a Matter of Choice_ , 83 J. PERSONALITY & Soc. PSYCHOL.1178, 1179 (2002).\n\n. Michael Melcher, _Why Thinking Like a Lawyer Is Bad for Your Career_ , A.B.A. J., Apr. 15, 2009, <http:\/\/www.abajournal.com\/weekly\/why_thinking_like_a_lawyer_is_bad_for_your_career>.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. _Id._\n\n. TAL BEN-SHAHAR, THE QUESTION OF HAPPINESS: ON FINDING MEANING, PLEASURE, AND THE ULTIMATE CURRENCY 54 (2002).\n\n. CHRISTOPHER PETERSON & MARTIN E.R SELIGMAN, VALUES IN ACTION (VIA) CLASSIFICATION OF STRENGTHS, Jan. 4, 2003, <http:\/\/www.ppc.sas.upenn.edu\/viamanualintro.pdf>, at 4. CHARACTER STRENGTHS AND VIRTUES: A HANDBOOK AND CLASSIFICATION (Christopher Peterson & Martin E.R Seligman eds. 2004). The twenty-four strengths are the positive character traits that are components of the virtues. Courage encompasses bravery, industry (perseverance and diligence), honesty (authenticity, sincerity, and integrity), and vitality. Humanity includes strength in the areas of intimate attachment, kindness, and intelligence. Justice includes citizenship and teamwork, fairness, and leadership. Temperance consists of forgiveness and mercy, modesty and humility, prudence, and regulation of oneself. Transcendence is comprised of an appreciation of beauty and excellence (awe and wonder), gratitude, hope (optimism, future-mindedness, future orientation), playfulness and humor, and spirituality. Wisdom contains creativity (originality and ingenuity), curiosity, active open-mindedness, love of learning, and perspective.\n\n. Martin Seligman, _Authentic Happiness_ , <http:\/\/www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu\/Default.aspx> (last visited July 4, 2009).\n\n. Peter H. Huang, _Authentic Happiness, Self-Knowledge and Legal Policy_ , 9 MINN. J.L. SCI. & TECH.755, 766 (2008).\n\n. Christopher K. Hsee & Reid Hastie, _Decision and Experience: Why Don't We Choose What Makes Us Happy?_ , http:\/\/papers.ssrn.com\/s0l3\/papers.cfm?abstract_id=9299i4&rec=1&srcabs=935470.\n\n. GILBERT, _supra_ note 32, at 137.\n\n. _Id._ at 143.\n\n. Hsee & Hastie, _supra_ note 102, at 3.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. Francois de La Rochefoucauld, quoted in Daniel T. Gilbert et al., _The Surprising Power of Neighborly Advice_ , 323 SCIENCE 1617 (Mar. 20, 2009).\n\n. GILBERT, _supra_ note 32, at 223.\n\n. Penelope Trunk, _The Connection Between a Good Job and Happiness Is Overrated_ , Brazen Careerist, <http:\/\/blog.penelopetrunk.com\/2007\/01\/16\/the-connection-between-a-good-job-and-happiness-is-overrated> (Jan. 16, 2007) (citing Daniel Gilbert).\n\n. Heather Brewer, _Snap Judgments_ , 9 Bus. L. TODAY 4 (Nov.\/Dec. 1999).\n\n. Lawrence S. Krieger, _The Inseparability of Professionalism and Personal Satisfaction: Perspectives on Values, Integrity, and Happiness_ , n CLINICAL L. REV.425, 435\u201336 (2005).\n\n. Id. at 436\u201337.\n\n### _Chapter 6_\n\n. JEREMY BLACHMAN, ANONYMOUS LAWYER 3 (2006).\n\n. Susan Deutschle, _Law Firm Retention Strategies Useful in Combating Attorney Turnover_ , COLUMBUS BUSINESS FIRST, Feb. 9, 2007, _available at_ <http:\/\/columbus.bizjournals.com\/columbus\/stories\/2007\/02\/12\/focus3.html?jst=s_cn_hl>.\n\n. Michael Renetzky, _The Smart Choice for Large Law Firms_ , <http:\/\/westle-galedcenter.com\/prm\/prmJSEjsf?id=50856i4> (last visited July 11, 2009).\n\n. ELLEN FREEDMAN, CALCULATING THE TRUE COST OF TURNOVER, 2005, <http:\/\/www.pa-lawfirmconsulting.com\/pdfs\/hr\/CALCULATING_THE_TRUE_COST_OF_TURNOVER.pdf>.\n\n. Peter Huang & Rick Swedloff, _Authentic Happiness & Meaning at Law Firms_, 58 SYRACUSE L. REV.335, 337 (2008) (citing studies).\n\n. _See_ Carol Graham, _Does Happiness Pay? An Exploration Based on Panel Data from Russia, Center on Social and Economic Dynamics Working Paper No. 28_ , May 2002, _available at_ <http:\/\/ssrn.com\/abstract=i0283i9>.\n\n. J.R. Minkel, _Happiness: Good for Creativity, Bad for Single-Minded Focus_ , SCI. AM., Dec. 18, 2006, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.scientificamerican.com\/article.cfm?id=happiness-good-for-creati>.\n\n. While numerous researchers have found effects in the populations they studied of co-workers spreading happiness, _see_ KIM S. CAMERON ET AL., POSITIVE ORGANIZATIONAL SCHOLARSHIP: FOUNDATIONS OF A NEW DISCIPLINE (2003); Sigal G. Barsade, _The Ripple Effect: Emotional Contagion in Groups_ , Oct. 2000, <http:\/\/papers.ssrn.com\/s0l3\/papers.cfmPabstract_id=250894>; Joanne H. Gavin & Richard O. Mason, _The Virtuous Organiza-tion:The Value of Happiness in the Workplace_ , 33 ORG. DYNAMICS 379 (2004); Marisa Salanova et al., _Flow at Work: Evidence for an Upward Spiral of Personal and Organizational Resources,']]._ HAPPINESS STUD, I (2006), other researchers have not found such workplace effects. See James H. Fowler & Nicholas A. Christakis, _Dynamic Spread of Happiness in a Large Social Network: Longitudinal Analysis Over 20Years in the Framingham Heart Study_ , 337 BRITISH MED. J. 2338 (Dec. 4, 2008).\n\n. See ELAINE HATPLELD ET AL., EMOTIONAL CONTAGION (1994).\n\n. Leslie A. Gordon, _Mid-Career Malaise, 94 A.B.A.j._ 38, 42 (Sept. 2008) (attorney career coach Debra Bruce).\n\n. _What Makes a Law Firm a Good Place to Work?, 26_ PA. LAW.14 (Dec. 2004).\n\n. Marc Galanter & William Henderson, _The Elastic Tournament: A Second Transformation of the Big Law Firm_ , 60 STAN. L. REV.1867, 1922n.235 (2008).\n\n. Diane Stafford, _Gen Y Reshaping the Workplace_ , K.C. STAR, July 6, 2008, at Ci.\n\n. PEGGY BLAKE GLEESON, MANAGING AND MOTIVATING THE GENERATIONS: IMPLICATIONS FOR THE STUDENT AND THE EMPLOYEE 7, Feb. 12\u201316, 2003, <http:\/\/www.uwsp.edu\/Education\/facets\/lmks_resources\/4413.pdf>.\n\n. NEIL HOWE & WILLIAM STRAUSS, _Characteristics of the Millennial Generation, in_ MlLLENNIALS GO TO COLLEGE (2003), _available at_ <http:\/\/wwwd.umn.edu\/advising\/MulennialTraits.doc>.\n\n. Shannon Henson, _Senior Partners Not LOLing at Gen Y's Perceptions_ , Oct. 9, 2008. <http:\/\/securities.law360.com\/articles\/71585>.\n\n. GLEESON, _supra_ note 14, at 7.\n\n. M. DIANE VOGT & LORI-ANN RICKARD, KEEPING GOOD LAWYERS: BEST PRACTICES TO CREATE CAREER SATISFACTION 84 (2000).\n\n. Lisa B. Bingham et al., _Exploring the Role of Representation in Employment Mediation at the USPS_ , 17 OHIO ST. J. ON DISP. RESOL.341, 350 (2002).\n\n. _See_ Lisa G. Lerman, _The Slippery Slope From Ambition to Greed to Dishonesty: Lawyers, Money and Professional Integrity_ , 30 HOFSTRA L. REV.879 (2002).\n\n. Gina Passarella, _Keeping a Legal Department Effective on a Smaller Budget_ , LEGAL INTELLIGENCER, Dec. 17, 2008, at 7.\n\n. Aric Press, _In-House at the American Lawyer_ , AM. LAW., Dec. 2008, at 11.\n\n. Call to Action: Diversity in the Legal Profession, _Corporate Signatories_ , <http:\/\/www.clocalltoaction.com\/> (last visited Dec. 1, 2008).\n\n. See Angela Brouse, Comment, _The Latest Call for Diversity in Law Firms: Is It Legal?_ , 75 UMKC L. REV.847 (2007).\n\n. _First Ever World Map of Happiness Produced_ , July 28, 2006, <http:\/\/www.physorg.com\/news73321785.html>.\n\n. Robert Putnam, _E Plurihus Unum: Diversity and Community in the Twenty-first Century_ , 30 SCANDINAVIAN POLITICAL STUD.137, 149\u201350 (2007).\n\n. MARTIN L. HOFFMAN, EMPATHY AND MORAL DEVELOPMENT: IMPLICATIONS FOR CARING AND JUSTICE 62 (2000).\n\n. See, _e.g._ , Michael E. Murphy, _The Nominating Process for Corporate Boards of Directors: A Decision-Making Analysis_ , 5 BERKELEY BUS. L.J. 131, 158 (2008) (\"While individuals value the strong relationships found in cohesive groups, they are most likely to find new ideas in social links that put them in contact with other social worlds or ways of thinking.\") (citing studies).\n\n. See _also_ Galanter & Henderson, _supra_ note 12, at 1922 (noting that Gen Y'ers \"demand a high level of racial and gender diversity within the firm's workforce\").\n\n. Malcolm Gladwell, <http:\/\/www.ted.com\/mdex.php\/talks\/lang\/eng\/malcolm_gladwell_on_spaghetti_sauce.html>.\n\n. See Muriel Goode-Trufant, _Beyond Diversity 2009: The Next Generation_ , 1722 PLI\/Corp 53, Feb. 25, 2009; David B. Wilkins, _From \"Separate Is InherentlyUnequal\" to \"Diversity Is Good for Business\": The Rise of Market-Based Diversity Arguments and the Fate of the Black Corporate Bar_, 117 HARV. L. REV.1548, 1557 (2004).\n\n. Putnam, _supra_ note 26, at 165.\n\n. Sunil J. Randall, _Enhancing Employee Performance Through Positive Organizational Behavior_ , 38 J. APP SOC. PSYCHOL.1580 (2008).\n\n. Peter Warr, _Jobs and Happiness_ , SOCIETY FOR INDUSTRIAL & ORGANIZATIONAL PSYCHOLOGY, INC., Jan. 2007, <http:\/\/www.siop.org\/tip\/Current\/04warr.aspx>.\n\n. CATALYST, WOMEN IN THE LAW: MAKING THE CASE 34 (2001), _available at_ <http:\/\/www.catalyst.org\/file\/165\/women_in_law_making_the_case.pdf>.\n\n. In the After the J.D. study, the measures on which lawyers expressed the highest degree of job satisfaction (on a scale of 1\u20147) were relationships with colleagues (5.7), level of responsibility (5.6), control over work methods (5.4), and intellectual challenge (5.4). Ronit Dinovitzer & Bryant G. Garth, _Lawyer Satisfaction in the Process of Structuring Legal Careers_ , 41 LAW & Soc'Y REV.1, 9 (2007).\n\n. Martin Seligman et al., _Why Lawyers Are Unhappy_ , 23 CARDOZO L. REV.33, 42 (2001).\n\n. Bruce A. Green, _Professional Challenges in Large Firm Practices_ , 33 FORDHAM URB. L.J. 7, 16\u201317 (2005).\n\n. _Id._ at 14.\n\n. SUSAN SAAB FORTNEY, IN PURSUIT OF ATTORNEY WORK-LIFE BALANCE: BEST PRACTICES IN MANAGEMENT 95\u201396 (Paula Patton ed. 2005).\n\n. Stephanie Ward, _The Ultimate Time-Money Trade-Off_ A.B. A. J., Feb. 2, 2007, at 2.\n\n. ABA COMMISSION ON BILLABLE HOURS, ABA COMMISSION ON BILLABLE HOURS REPORT ix n.iii (2002), <http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/careercounsel\/billable.html>; Francesca Jarosz, _Tipping Back the Scales_ , 16 Bus. L. TODAY 13, 18 (Mar.\/Apr. 2007).\n\n. CATALYST, BEYOND A REASONABLE DOUBT: LAWYERS STATE THEIR CASE ON JOB FLEXIBILITY 3 (Nov. 2006), <http:\/\/www.catalyst.org\/publication\/40\/beyond-a-reasonable-doubt-lawyers-state-their-case-on-job-flexibility>.\n\n. Joan C. Williams et al., _Law Firms as Defendants: Family Responsibilities Discrimination in Legal Workplaces_ , 34 PEPP. L. REV.393, 411 (2007).\n\n. Building a Better Legal Profession, <http:\/\/www.betterlegalprofession.org\/principles.php> (last visited July 5, 2009).\n\n. Galanter & Henderson, _supra_ note 12, at 1924.\n\n. Peter Lattman, _You Say You Want a Big-Law Revolution_ , WALL ST. J., Apr. 3, 2007, _available at_ <http:\/\/blogs.wsj.com\/law\/2007\/04\/03\/you-say-you-want-a-big-law-revolution>.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. _Id._\n\n. _Id._\n\n. Larry Kramer, _From the Dean_ , 81 STAN. LAW. 1 (Fall 2009).\n\n. _Id._\n\n53. _Id._\n\n. RICHARD H. THALER & CASS R. SUNSTEIN, NUDGE: IMPROVING DECISIONS ABOUT HEALTH, WEALTH, AND HAPPINESS 33\u201334 (2009).\n\n. Sharon Driscoll, _Law Firm Hiring: Time for a Change?_ , 81 STAN. LAW. 9, 11 (Fall 2009).\n\n. _Id._\n\n. Jeff Jeffrey, _Apprentice Programs Give First Years Extra Training_ , MIAMI DAILY Bus. REV., July 2, 2009, at A3.\n\n. Driscoll, _supra_ note 55, at 11.\n\n. Thomas Adcock, _10 N.Y. Firms Listed as Best for Women_ , N.Y.L.J., Aug. 15, 2008, at 24;Working Mother, _2008_ 50 _Best Law Firms for Women_ , 2008, <http:\/\/www.workingmother.com\/web?service=vpage\/2907>.\n\n. Deborah Epstein Henry, _Facing the FACTS: Introducing Work\/Life Choices for All Firm Lawyers Within the Billable Hours Model_ , <http:\/\/www.flextimelawyers.com\/pdf\/artio.pdf> (last visited Feb. 3, 2009).\n\n. CATALYST, _supra_ note 43, at 12.\n\n. For example, individualized work schedules may prompt lawyers to make relative comparisons.\n\n. Maria Vogel-Short, _Part-Time Lawyers Still a Rarity and Three-Quarters Are Women, Survey Says_ , N.J. L.J., Jan. 2, 2009, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.law.com\/jsp\/article.jsp?id=i202427i38453>.\n\n. Michael A. Scaperlanda, _Lawyering in the Little Way of St. Therese of Lisieux With Complete Abandonment and Love_ , 46 J. CATH. LEGAL STUD. 43, 48 (2007).\n\n. Joan Williams, _Our Economy of Mothers and Others: Women and Economics Revisited_ , 5 J. GENDER RACE & JUST. 411, 426 (2002).\n\n. CATALYST, _supra_ note 43, at 12.\n\n. Joan C. Williams & Stephanie Bornstein, _The Evolution of \"FRED\": Family Responsibilities Discrimination and Developments in the Law of Stereotyping and Implicit Bias_ , 59 HASTINGS L.J. 1311, 1329\u201330 (2008).\n\n. Ann A. Scott Timmer & Maureen Beyers, _Alternative Work Arrangements_ , 37 ARIZ. ATT'Y 40 (May 2001).\n\n. VOGT & RICKARD, _supra_ note 18, at 61. The idea is that firms should not pay bonuses for hours worked over a set amount. Instead, it is better to allow some carryover of hours into the next year or simply insist that your lawyers take the time off.\n\n. Audrey J. Lee, _Negotiating Part-Time Work: An Examination of How Attorneys Negotiate Part-Time Arrangements at Elite Law Firms_ , 6 PEPP. DISP. RESOL. L.J. 405, 414 (2006).\n\n. In 2004 IBM conducted a global work-life satisfaction survey of more than 42,000 of its employees in seventy-nine countries after implementation of flexible work options. It showed that 94 percent of all managers reported a strong link between those arrangements and the \"company's 'ability to retain talented professionals.' \" ARLENE JOHNSON ET AL., BUSINESS IMPACTS OF FLEXIBILITY: AN IMPERATIVE FOR EXPANSION 10 (2005), _available at_ www.cvworkingfamilies.org\/downloads\/BusinessImpac tsofFlexibility.pdf?CF ID=54713857& CFTOKEN=52379382. This experience echoed that of Deloitte in the 1990s when it undertook an initiative to reduce the high turnover rate for women. Surveys of its workers showed that flexibility was \"the factor most likely to improve retention of women,\" so \"the firm implemented flexibility as a key component of its women's initiative. Since then the turnover of women has dropped significantly, to the point that men's and women's turnover rates are now nearly equal.\" _Id._\n\n. Linda Bray Chanow, _The Business Case for Reduced Hours, Project for Attorney Retention_ , <http:\/\/www.pardc.org\/Publications\/business_case.shtml> (last visited June 20, 2009).\n\n. Law Society of Alberta, Alternative Work Schedules: Guidelines for Law Firms, <http:\/\/www.lawsocietyalberta.com\/resources\/modelEquityPolicies\/alternativeschedules.cfm> (last visited June 29, 2009).\n\n. DEBORAH L. RHODE, BALANCED LIVES: CHANGING THE CULTURE OF LEGAL PRACTICE 41 (2001).\n\n. Kira Dale Pfisterer, _When Three Fill Two: Part-Time Strategies for Full-Time Jobs_ , 51 ADVOCATE (Idaho) 15, 17 (Feb. 2008).\n\n. MILTON C. REGAN, JR., EAT WHAT YOU KILL: THE FALL OF A WALL STREET LAWYER 37 (2004).\n\n. William D. Henderson, An Empirical Study of Single-Tier Versus Two-Tier Partnerships in the Am Law 200, 84 N.C. L. REV. (2006), <http:\/\/papers.ssrn.com\/sol3\/papers.cfm?abstract_id=871094>.\n\n. Ian J. Silverbrand, Note, _Modified Partnership Structures and Their Effects on Associate Satisfaction_ , 21 GEO. J. LEGAL ETHICS 165, 195 (2008).\n\n. William D. Henderson & David Zaring, _Young Associates in Trouble_ , 105 MICH. L. REV.1087, 1096 (2007).\n\n. Kenneth G. Dau-Schmidt & Kaushik Mukhopadhaya, _The Fruits of Our Labors: An Empirical Study of the Distribution of Income and Job Satisfaction Across the Legal Profession_ , 49 J. LEGAL EDUC.342, 346 (1999).\n\n. _See_ Silverbrand, _supra_ note 78. This might also be a function of the greater competition for partnership positions at the studied firms.\n\n. _Redefining How Your Law Firm Splits the Pie: What Works Now?_ , 06\u20148 LAW OFF. MGMT.& ADMIN. Rep. 2 (Aug. 2006) (\"56.1% of law firms with 100 or more attorneys use a lockstep system by class for associate compensation. The same is true for 45.4% of firms with 50 to 99 lawyers, but only 21.4% of smaller firms.\").\n\n. Joel A. Rose, _Firms Rethink Partners' Pay as Leverage Declines_ , 09\u201404 COMP.& BENEFITS FOR LAW OFFICES 1, 2\u20133 (Apr. 2009), _available at_ www.ioma.com\/law.\n\n. Maarten Vendrick & Geert Woltjer, _Happiness and Loss Aversion: When Social Participation Dominates Comparison_ , July 2006, <http:\/\/papers.ssrn.com\/s0l3\/papers.cfm?abstract_id=92io67>.\n\n. Patrick J. Schiltz, _On Being a Happy, Healthy, and Ethical Member of an Unhappy, Unhealthy, and Unethical Profession_ , 52 VAND. L. REV.871, 906 (1999)-\n\n. Stephen Overell, _A Working Recipe for the Quality of Life_ , FINANCIAL TIMES (London), Jan. 24, 2002, at 13.\n\n. Steve Crabtree, _The Economics of Happiness_ , GALLUP MGMT. J., Jan. 10, 2008, <http:\/\/grnj.gallup.com\/content\/103549\/Economics-Happiness.aspx>.\n\n. _Employers Urged to Focus on Training to Increase Job Satisfaction_ , Apr. 11, 2007, www.trainingfoundation.com\/page\/research\/2913 .html.\n\n. Andrew E. Clark et al., _Relative Income, Happiness and Utility: An Explanation for the Easterlin Paradox and Other Puzzles_ 19, June 2007, <http:\/\/papers.ssrn.com\/sol3\/papers.cfm?abstract_id=998225>.\n\n. Elizabeth Goldberg, _Midlevel Blues_ , 28 AM. LAW.98 (Aug. 2006).\n\n. Kristin K. Stark & Blane Prescott, _Why Associates Leave: Research Shows That Attrition Has Very Little to Do With Money_ , LEGAL TIMES, May 7, 2007, at 45-\n\n. Jon Lindsey & Chuck Fanning, _After the Handshake_ , AM. LAW. Feb. 2007, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.law.com\/jsp\/tal\/PubArticleTAL.jsp?id=90000547278i>.\n\n. Drew Combs, _The Revolutionaries_ , 30 AM. LAW.102 (Aug. 2008).\n\n. Clark et al., _supra_ note 89, at 31.\n\n. PETER B. SLOAN, FROM CLASSES TO COMPETENCIES, LOCKSTEP TO LEVELS (Blackwell Sanders LLP 2007).\n\n. Faculty Colloquium, Oct. 10, 2008, UMKC School of Law.\n\n. _Gender or Childcare? Study Sheds Light on Career Roadblocks_ , INDIANA L., Fall 2009, at 3 (quoting Marc Galanter).\n\n. MALCOLM GLADWELL, THE TIPPING POINT: HOW LITTLE THINGS CAN MAKE A BIG DIFFERENCE 187 (2002).\n\n. _Id._ at 179.\n\n. _Id._ at 180.\n\n. _Id._ at 190.\n\n. _Id._ at 184. Other researchers, while agreeing with Dunbar that relationships in organizations break down once the group reaches a certain size, have come up with slightly different numbers for what that tipping point is. For example, anthropologists such as H. Russell Bernard have come up with a median estimate of 231 for the number of significant ties that a person living in the contemporary world can have. See H. RUSSELL BERNARD & CHRISTOPHER MCCARTY, THE NETWORK SCALE-UP METHOD: BACKGROUND AND THEORY 15 (Feb. 2009), _available at_ http:\/\/nersp.nerdc.ufl.edu\/~ufruss\/scale-up\/scale-up%20method%20theory%20and%2ohistory%20with%20 notes.pdf.\n\n. Douglas McCollam, _The End of Big Law_ , WALL ST. J., July 30, 2009, at A15.\n\n. Susan Saab Fortney _Soul for Sale: An Empirical Study of Associate Satisfaction, Firm Culture, and the Effects of Billable Hour Requirements_ , 69 UMKC L. REV. 239, 283 (2000).\n\n. NALP FOUNDATION FOR RESEARCH AND EDUCATION, KEEPING THE KEEPERS: STRATEGIES FOR ASSOCIATE RETENTION IN A TIME OF ATTRITION 14 (1998).\n\n. John Monahan & Jeffrey Swanson, _Lawyers at Mid-Career: A 20-Year Longitudinal Study of Job and Life Satisfaction_ , 5 J. EMPIRICAL LEGAL STUD, 1, 41 (forthcoming 2009).\n\n. SONJA LYUBOMIRSKY, THE HOW OF HAPPINESS: A NEW APPROACH TO GETTING THE LIFE YOU WANT 130 (2007).\n\n. Adcock, _supra_ note 59, at 24.\n\n. David Pollard, _Men Offer Appreciation; Woman Offer Attention_ , How To Save the World, <http:\/\/blogs.salon.eom\/0002007\/2006\/03\/26.html#a1478> (Mar. 26, 2006).\n\n. Elizabeth A. Amos & Bart L. Weathington, _An Analysis of the Relation Between Employee-Organization Value Congruence and Employee Attitudes_ , 142 J. PSYCHOL.615 (2008).\n\n. Ezra Tom Clark, Jr., _Characteristics of Successful Law Firms_ , 33 ARIZ. ATT'Y 16 (May 1997).\n\n. Peter Lattman, _Does \"Thank You\" Help Keep Associates?_ , WALL ST. J., Jan. 24, 2007, at B7.\n\n. THE AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION STANDING COMMITTEE ON PRO BONO AND PUBLIC SERVICE, SUPPORTING JUSTICE: A REPORT ON THE PRO BONO WORK OF AMERICA'S LAWYERS 5 (2005), _available at_ <http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/legalservices\/probono\/report.pdf>.\n\n. RONIT DINOVITZER ET AL., AFTER THE J.D.: FIRST RESULTS OF A NATIONAL STUDY OF LEGAL CAREERS 49 (2004); AMERICAN BAR ASSOCIATION, 2009 NATIONAL LAWYER POPULATION SURVEY, <http:\/\/www.abanet.org\/market-research\/2009_NATL_LAWYER_by_State.pdf>.\n\n. Linda Campillo, _A Dog's Best Friend_ , 57 OR. ST. B. BULL.27 (Jan. 1997).\n\n. _25 Top-Paying Companies_ , FORTUNE, Jan. 22, 2008, _available at_ <http:\/\/money.cnn.com\/galleries\/2008\/fortune\/0801\/gallery.bestcos_toppay.fortune\/25.html>.\n\n. Michelle Conlin, _Out of a Fishbowl_ , FORBES, Dec. 16, 1996, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.bartlit-beck.com\/articles\/detail.asp?whichid=1436407222004>.\n\n. Huang & Swedloff, _supra_ note 5, at 349.\n\n. Juliana B. Berry, _Motivating the Masses_ , LEGAL MGMT., 2007, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.alanet.org\/publications\/issue\/octnov07\/Motivation.pdf>\n\n. ALAIN DE BOTTON, THE ARCHITECTURE OF HAPPINESS 72 (2006).\n\n. CHRISTOPHER ALEXANDER ET AL., A PATTERN LANGUAGE: TOWNS, BUILDINGS, CONSTRUCTION (1977).\n\n. Jamie Friddle, _Finding Our Happy Place_ , COMMON GROUND, Jan. 2008, <http:\/\/commongroundmag.com\/2008\/01\/happyplace0801.html>.\n\n. ALEXANDER ET AL., _supra_ note 121, at 747.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. _Id._ at 890.\n\n. MARNI BARNES, HEALING GARDENS: THERAPEUTIC BENEFITS AND DESIGN RECOMMENDATIONS 59 (1999).\n\n. ALEXANDER ET AL., _supra_ note 121, at 1165.\n\n. THOMAS MERTON, THE LIVING BREAD 126 (1980).\n\n. ALEXANDER ET AL., _supra_ note 121, at 702.\n\n. Sheila Muto, _Law Firms Give Thought to Office-Design Issues_ , WALL ST. J., July 8, 2003, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.realestatejournal.com\/propertyreport\/office\/20030708-muto.html>.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. _Id._\n\n. EJ. ROETHLISBERGER & WlLLIAM J. DICKSON, MANAGEMENT AND THE WORKER 14\u201317 (1939) (describing the Hawthorne effect).\n\n### _Chapter 7_\n\n. DANIEL GILBERT, STUMBLING ON HAPPINESS 224 (2006).\n\n. Sue M. Halpern, _Are You Happy?_ , 55 N.Y. REV. BOOKS, Apr. 3, 2008, _available at_ <http:\/\/www.nybooks.com\/articles\/21197>.\n\n. The reports from lawyers in this chapter come from a variety of sources. Most stories come from about two hundred lawyers around the country who responded to a set of questions about career satisfaction that we sent by e-mail. In many cases respondents to the e-mail survey were contacted by phone and asked additional questions. Several other stories in this chapter come from student papers written for a short course we offered at the UMKC Law School. Students in the course were asked to report on interviews they conducted with experienced lawyers of their own choosing. A few additional stories, as indicated by footnotes, come from other publications.\n\n. Diane Curtis, _Billable Hours Intersect With the Profession's Woes_ , CAT. B.J., Jan. 2008, _available at_ http:\/\/www.calbar.ca.gov\/state\/calbar\/calbar_cbj.jsp?sCategoryPath=\/Home\/Attorney%2oResources\/California%20 Bar%20journal\/January2008&sCatHtmlPath=cbj\/2008-01_TH_o1_Billable-hours.html&sCatHtmlTitle=Top%20Headlines.\n\n. Melanie Lasoff Levs, _Best for the Business: \"Top Workplace\" Firms Garner Loyalty from Clients and Employees_ , 94 A.B.A. J. 34 (May 2008).\n\n. John Monahan & Jeffrey Swanson, _Lawyers at Mid-Career: A 20-Year Longitudinal Study of Job and Life Satisfaction_ , 5 J. EMPIRICAL LEGAL STUD, I, 26\u201427 (forthcoming 2009).\n\n. _Depression Among Lawyers: Chicken or Egg_ , <http:\/\/www.thedisgruntledlawyer.com\/law_school_advice\/> (last visited June 19, 2009).\n\n. Alex Williams, _The Falling-Down Professions_ , N.Y. TIMES, Jan. 6, 2008, at 91.\n\n. James Brosnahan, _\"Nothing Compares to the Electricity of an Actual Trial, and It Is Magnified When It Is a Jury Trial,\"_ 95 A.B.A. J. 50, 52, 63 (Mar. 2009).\n\n. Beyond the Underground, _What Do You Like Best About Being a Lawyer?_ , Feb. 14, 2005, <http:\/\/www.legalunderground.com\/2005\/02\/what_do_you_lik.html> (posted by NBT at 1:11 P.M.).\n\n. _Id._ (posted at 10:31 A.M.).\n\n. Monahan & Swanson, _supra_ note 6, at 2.\n\n. Edward A. Adams, _Survey : Young Lawyers Glad They're Attorneys_ , 95 A.B.A. J. 65, 65 (Mar. 2009).\n\n. Leslie A. Gordon, _Mid-Career Malaise_ , 94 A.B.A. J. 38, 39 (Sept. 2008).\n\n. Leslie Gordon, _Beyond the Law.JDs in All Walks of Life_ , STAN LAW.18, 21 (Spring 2008).\n\n. _Id._ at 22.\n\n. Dahlia Lithwick, _Legal Matters: The Importance of Being Irreverent_ , STAN. LAW.28, 30, 32 (Fall 2008).\n\n. _See_ chapter 1, text at note 36.\n\n. See Martha Neil, _Which Lawyers Love Their Jobs?, A.H.A.]._ Law News Now, Jan. 22, 2008, <http:\/\/www.abajournal.com\/news\/lawyers_who_love_the_law>.\n\n. _See_ chapter 5, text at note 11.\n\n### _Chapter 8_\n\n. Alice Park, _Wellness: A Primer for Pessimists_ , TIME, Apr. 6, 2009, at 2.\n\n. ERIC WEINER, THE GEOGRAPHY OF BLISS 182 (2008).\n\n. EDUARDO PUNSET, THE HAPPINESS TRIP: A SCIENTIFIC JOURNEY 53 (2007).\n\n. David Ian Miller, _Eric Weiner, Author of \"The Geography of Bliss,\" on What the Happiest Places on Earth Can Teach Us_ , S.F. GATE, Feb. 11, 2008, <http:\/\/www.sfgate.com\/cgi-bin\/article.cgi?f=\/g\/a\/2008\/02\/n\/findrelig>. DTL& type=printable, quoting Eric Weiner.\n\n. ERIC G. WILSON, AGAINST HAPPINESS: IN PRAISE OF MELANCHOLY (2008).\n\n. Alan Wolfe, _Hedonic Man_ , NEW REPUBLIC, July 9, 2008, _available at_ http:\/\/www.tnr.com\/booksarts\/story.html?id=3bcoe959\u20143b4e-44od-9b99\u201469078429b82c&p=2. Happiness has drawn other naysayers. Barbara Ehrenreich argues that positive thinking is a collective form of \"mass delusion.\" BARBARA EHRENREICH, BRIGHT-SIDED: HOW THE RELENTLESS PROMOTION OF POSITIVE THINKING HAS UNDERMINED AMERICA 13 (2009). A national ideology of excessive optimism, she says, has fueled things like the sub-prime mortgage crisis and the invasion of Iraq. _Id._ at 11. On the personal level, certain positive thinking techniques, such as \"self-hypnosis,\" promote \"magical thinking\" and require \"deliberate self-deception, including a constant effort to repress or block out unpleasant possibilities and 'negative' thoughts.\" _Id._ at 46\u201447, 5. We won't attempt to tackle generalizations about America's collective mental state (although we agree that unthinking indulgence in positive thinking certainly has its downsides), but chapter 2 is a response to her wholesale dismissal of the Science of happiness research.\n\n. Jonah Lehrer, _Depression's Upside_ , N.Y. TIMES MAG., Feb. 28, 2010, at 38\u201344.\n\n. Joseph Brodsky, _Listening to Boredom_ , HARPER'S MAG., Mar. 1995, at 11.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. _Id._\n\n. Conan O'Brien, Commencement Speech to the Harvard Class of 2000, Feb. 7, 2000, <http:\/\/www.february-7.com\/features\/c0nan.htm>.\n\n. Darrin M. McMahon, _The Pursuit of Happiness in Perspective_ , Apr. 8, 2007, <http:\/\/www.cato-unbound.org\/2007\/04\/08\/darrin-m-mcmahon\/the-pursuit-of-happiness-in-perspective\/> (quoting Thomas Jefferson's letter to John Page, July 15, 1763).\n\n. WEINER, _supra_ note 2, at 74, quotingjohn Stuart Mill.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. DANIEL NETTLE, HAPPINESS: THE SCIENCE BEHIND YOUR SMILE 87 (2005).\n\n. Joshua Wolf Shenk, _What Makes Us Happy?_ , ATLANTIC, June 2009, at 36, 46.\n\n. Penelope Trunk, _The Connection Between a Good Job and Happiness Is Overrated_ , Brazen Careerist, http:\/\/blog.penelopetrunk.com\/2007\/01\/16\/the-connection-between-a-good-job-and-happiness-is-overrated (Jan. 16, 2007).\n\n. _Id._ , citing professor of urban studies and creativity, Richard Florida.\n\n. NETTLE, _supra_ note 15, at 180.\n\n. _Id._\n\n. WEINER, _supra_ note 2, at 54.\n\n## **Index**\n\nadaptation, \u201342, , \u2013101,\n\naddiction, \u201327\n\nage factors and happiness, \u201310, \u201319, , , \u201373, \u201370,\n\nalcoholism, ,\n\naligning work and values, \u201351, , \u20138, , \u201317, \u201348, , \u201398, \u201326, \u201338\n\nanticipation and happiness,\n\narchitecture, , \u2013204,  n.120\n\nattention and happiness, \u201399, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,  n.109\n\nAuthentic Happiness Center,\n\nauthenticity, \u201346,  n.99\n\nautonomy. _See_ control\n\nbillable hours, , \u201356, , \u201385, , , , , , \u201368, \u201374, \u201381, \u201313, , nn.9, ,  n.52,  n.42,  n.60,  n.4\n\nBen-Shahar, Tal, \u201347,  n.98\n\nboredom, \u201396, , , \u201318, \u201335, ,  n.8\n\nbrain chemistry. _See_ neuroscience\n\nBrodsky, Joseph, ,  n.8\n\nBuilding a Better Legal Profession, x, , \u201378, ,  n.45\n\ncareers\n\nchanging. _See_ jobs, changing\n\nchoosing a career (out of law school), , \u201357\n\nnon-law, , , \u201315, \u201349, , \u201328\n\npaths, , , \u201349, , \u201359, \u201331\n\nchecklists, \u201311, \u201349, \u20137,\n\nChristakis, Nicholas, \u201317,  n.10\n\ncircumstances (as a determinant of happiness), \u201315, , \u201343\n\ncivility, decline of, , \u201362, , \u201323, , , \u201314, nn.21,\n\nclients\n\nas a source of happiness, , , , , , , \u20138, , \u201323, , \u201345, , , , , , \u201330\n\nas a source of unhappiness, \u201354, \u201366, , , , , \u201368, \u201316\n\nColby, William, \u201330, ,  n.37\n\ncommitment to job, , \u201396, \u201310, , , , ,\n\ncompensation. _See_ income; lawyers, salaries of\n\ncompetence, , , , , , ,\n\ncontrol, \u201310, , , , \u201347, \u201353, , , , , , \u201386, , , , , , , \u201356, , \u201385, \u201389, , \u201313, , ,  n.15,  n.36\n\ncultural differences, \u201332\n\nCzikszentmihaly, Mihalyi, , nn.34, ,\n\nDavidson, Richard, , ,  n.18\n\ndepression, \u20137, , , , , \u201381, \u201330, \u201334,  n.23,  n.49,  n.7\n\ndownward comparisons, \u201390, ,\n\ndrugs and happiness, \u201328\n\nemotional contagion, , \u201317, \u201364, \u201383, nn.8,\n\neudaemonia, , \u20139, \u201336\n\n_See also_ happiness, long term (well-lived life)\n\nevolutionary psychology, \u201322\n\nexercise, \u201331, ,  n.19\n\nexpectations. _See also_ predictions\n\nlaw firms' work, , , , , , ,\n\nunrealistic expectations as a source of unhappiness, , , ,\n\nextroversion, \u201335, , \u201375, , , ,  n.57\n\nfeedback and happiness, , \u201395,\n\nflexible work arrangements, \u201386, \u201357, \u201374, \u201382, ,  n.68, nn.70\u201371\n\nflow experiences, \u2013100, , \u201320, nn.35, ,  n.8\n\nFowler, James, \u201317,  n.10\n\ngender, \u201314, , , , , , , , , , \u201371, \u201380, , ,  nn.39\u201340, , , \u201349,  nn.51, \u201356,  n.23,  n.57,  n.29,  n.35,  nn.59, ,\n\ngenerational differences, \u201370,  n.20\n\ngenetics, , \u201334, , ,\n\ngeography, , , \u201345, , , ,  n.21,  n.16,  nn.2,\n\nGilbert, Daniel, , , \u2013101, , , ,  n.37,  nn.42, ,  n.7,  nn.25, , , ,  n.32,  nn.103, , , ,  n.1\n\nGladwell, Malcolm, , \u201392,  nn.30,\n\nGoogle, ix, \u201398\n\nhappiness (and unhappiness)\n\nbenefits of happiness, , \u201364\n\ncircumstances and, , \u201333, \u201343\n\ncontagiousness. _See_ emotional contagion\n\ndefinitions of, \u201319,\n\ngenetics and. _See_ genetics\n\nlong term (well-lived life), , \u20139, \u201336\n\nmeasuring (and methodological concerns), \u20135, \u20138, \u201325, \u201332, , \u201350,\n\nsatisfaction. _See_ satisfaction\n\nset point, \u201335, , , , , , , ,\n\ntransient. _See_ pleasure\n\ntrust and. _See_ trust\n\nhedonic treadmill. _See_ adaptation\n\nHopkins, Michael, \u201331\n\nincivility. _See_ civility, decline of\n\nincome, \u201311, , \u201339, , , , \u201388, , \u201338, ,\n\nrelative comparisons, , , \u201390\n\n_See also_ money\n\ninterests, , , , , , , , \u201349, , , , , , ,\n\nInternet, ,\n\ninterviewing for a job, , \u201341, , \u201356,  n.55\n\nintroversion, \u201335, , ,  n.57\n\njobs\n\nchanging, , \u201373, , , \u201326,\n\nsatisfaction, x-xii, \u201316, , \u201373, , , , , \u20139, , , , , , , , , \u201380, , , , \u201397, \u20135, \u201328, , ,  n.3,  nn.5, ,  n.16,  n.28,  n.1,  nn.8, ,  n.23,  n.36\n\njob search. _See_ interviewing for a job\n\nKrieger, Larry, , \u201330, ,  n.50,  n.61,  n.15,  n.41,  nn.51, , , ,  n.111\n\nLSAT scores and happiness,\n\nlaw firms\n\nattrition, , , , \u201362, , \u201391, \u201395, ,  n.20,  n.2,  n.91,  n.105\n\nbenefit of happy lawyers, \u201364\n\ncompensation systems, , , , , , , , \u201381, \u201391, , \u20136, ,  n.52,  n.87,  n.29\n\ncompetition within firms, \u201361, ,\n\ndesign of offices, \u2013204\n\ndiversity, , , \u201370, ,  n.87,  nn.23, , , , , \u201370 n.31\n\nlarge firms, , \u20139, \u201315, \u201356, \u201363, \u201383, , , , , , , , , , \u201387, \u201393, , \u201314, ,  n.48,  n.10,  n.28,  n.59,  n.3,  n.38\n\nloyalty, , \u201367, \u201371, , ,\n\nmentoring in. _See_ mentoring\n\nmergers,\n\nplayfulness, \u201398, ,  n.99\n\npromotion, , , , , \u201391,  n.52\n\nsize of firm and happiness, \u201356, , , , \u201395, , \u201393\n\nsmall firms, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,  n.10\n\ntraining, , , , , , , , , \u201396, \u20136,  n.36,  n.87,  n.88\n\ntransparency, , \u201391\n\nlaw practice\n\nalternate careers to, , , \u201315, \u201349, , \u201328\n\nchanging nature of, \u201386, \u201368, \u201374, \u201381\n\nethics, \u201359, , , \u201314,  nn.15, ,  nn.24, , ,  n.38,  n.85\n\ngovernment work, \u20139, \u201314, , , , , , ,  n.34,  n.10\n\nnobility of, \u201368\n\npublic interest work, , , \u201337, , , \u201397, , , \u201330,  n.52,  nn.67,\n\nsatisfaction with, changes over course of career, \u201372\n\nsources of satisfaction with, \u201370\n\ntechnology, impact of, , ,\n\ntypes of practice, , \u201315, , , \u201315, \u201320, , , , \u201346, \u201379, , , \u201331,  n.59\n\nlaw schools\n\nbias toward big firms, \u201341, \u201376\n\ncareer services, \u201324, \u201341, ,\n\nchoosing a, \u201324\n\ncourses on happy lawyering, \u201324\n\ncurriculum, , \u201325\n\ndebt (coping with), , \u201338\n\neffect of on happiness,\n\nexperiencing as a student, \u201334,\n\nhappiness as it relates to rank of, \u201315, \u201318\n\nimportance of peers in, \u201317\n\ntuition, \u201336,  n.69\n\nvisiting schools, \u201322\n\n_See also_ legal education\n\nlaw students\n\ncompetition, , \u201330,  n.16\n\nexperiencing law school, \u201334,\n\ngrades, , \u201330, \u201334,\n\nideals, , ,\n\ninterviewing. _See_ interviewing for a job\n\nintrinsic motivations, , , , \u201333,\n\npersonalities, , \u201329, , \u201347, ,  n.54\n\nsocial connections, , \u201334\n\nstatistics, , , , , , , \u201336,  n.39, \u201361 n.2, \u201364 n.48,  n.69\n\nstress, \u201333, ,  nn.41,\n\nsuccess in, , \u201376, \u201334, ,  n.1\n\nlawyers\n\nassociates, x, \u20136, \u201311, , \u201357, \u201362, , , , , \u201357, , , , \u201396, , \u20137, , \u201318, ,  n.3,  n.18,  n.34,  n.55,  n.9,  n.73,  n.87,  n.79,  n.91,  n.112\n\nfemale, \u201314, , , , , , , , , , \u201371, \u201380, , ,  nn.39\u201340, , , \u201349,  nn.51, \u201356,  n.23,  n.57,  n.29,  n.35,  nn.59, ,\n\nlaterals, , , ,\n\nlayoffs, ,\n\ngay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered, , , , , ,  n.45,  n.52\n\npartners, , \u201313, \u201358, \u201362, \u201372, \u201357, , \u201367, \u201396, , \u20137, , , , ,  n.49,  n.30,  n.87,  n.16,  nn.77, ,  n.83\n\npersonality, \u201377, \u201357 n.56,  nn.57, ,  n.64\n\npublic opinion of, \u201368\n\npublic sector. _See_ law practice, government work\n\nracial minorities, \u201314, , , , ,  n.42,  nn.51, , ,  n.65,  n.29\n\nsalaries of, \u201314, , \u201363, , , , , , \u201336, , , , , , , , , , , \u201390,  n.34,  n.13,  n.52,  nn.71\u201373\n\nstatistics, x, \u20133, , , , , ,  nn.5, ,  n.34,  nn.39, \u201349,  n.52,  nn.8,\n\nunhappiness, causes of, xi, \u201317, , , , \u201367, , \u201378, \u201388, , \u201326, , \u201342, , \u201377, , , , , ,\n\nlawyers' stories, , \u201345, , , \u201331,  n.3\n\nlegal education\n\ncollaborative learning, \u201320,  n.20\n\ncurriculum. _See_ law schools, curriculum\n\nhumanizing, \u201323, ,  n.29\n\nlaw professors, , \u201323, \u201332, \u201340,  n.83\n\n_See also_ law schools\n\nloan repayment assistant programs, \u201337,  nn.74\u201378\n\nLykken, David, ,  n.25\n\nLyubomirsky, Sonja, , , , ,  nn.27, ,  nn.41, , , \u20133,  n.18,  nn.27, ,  n.107\n\nmarriage, ,\n\nmattering, , \u201384, , , ,\n\nmeasuring happiness. _See_ happiness, measuring\n\nmethodological concerns. _See_ happiness, measuring\n\nmeditation, , ,  n.18\n\nmelancholy, , \u201335,  n.5\n\nMelcher, Michael, , \u201343,  n.28,  n.57,  n.95\n\nmentoring, , , , , , , \u201367, \u201372, \u201391, , , ,  n.9\n\nmoney, , \u201311, , , \u201357, \u201363, , , , , , , \u201314, , , , , , , \u201377, , , , , ,  nn.35, ,  n.28,  n.24,  n.20,  n.41,  n.91,  n.116\n\n_See also_ income\n\nMyers-Briggs,  n.55,  n.57\n\nNettle, Daniel, ,  n.23,  n.52,  nn.13, ,  n.79,  nn.15,\n\nneuroscience, \u201331,\n\nNiebuhr, Reinhold,\n\nO'Brien, Conan, ,  n.11\n\noccupations other than law, , , \u20137, \u201352, , \u201365, , , , \u201393, , \u201315, , \u201328,  n.5\n\nOffer, Avner,\n\nparadox of choice, , \u201373, , \u201343,  n.51,  n.50,  n.90\n\npersonality as relates to happiness, , \u201335, , \u201377, \u201314, \u201330, , , \u201347, , ,  n.26,  n.54, \u201358 n.56,  n.57,  n.64\n\npessimism, , \u201377, ,  n.59\n\npleasure (short-term or transient happiness), \u201319, \u201330, , \u20135,\n\npoll data. _See_ surveys\n\npositive attitude, , \u201385,\n\npositive psychology, ix, xi, , , , ,  n.47\n\npredicting future happiness, \u201342, \u2013103, \u201352\n\npro bono work, , , , , , , \u201397, \u201330, ,  n.113\n\npublic interest work, \u201335, , \u201397, , ,  nn.67,\n\npublic perception of lawyers, \u201368,\n\nPunset, Eduardo, \u201324, \u201381, , , ,  n.5,  n.16,  n.1,  n.8,  n.51,  n.81,  n.3\n\nPutnam, Robert, , \u201370,  n.26,  n.26,  n.32\n\nrace. _See_ lawyers, racial minorities\n\nrecession, , \u201361, , \u201388, ,\n\nrelationships and happiness, , \u201338, , , , , , , , , , \u201396, \u201317, , , , , , \u201389, , , \u201316, \u201340,  n.28,  n.36,  n.102\n\nreligious beliefs and happiness, , \u201346,  n.37\n\nRhode, Deborah, ,  nn.49, ,  n.3,  n.74\n\nRostron, Allen, \u201384, ,  n.4\n\n\"Rule of ,\" \u201393\n\nsadness. _See_ melancholy\n\nsalaries. _See_ income; lawyers, salaries of\n\nsatisfaction\n\nkeys to, xi, \u201316, , \u201347, \u201352, \u201373, \u2013111, \u201318, , \u201324, \u201334, \u201347, , , \u2013209, \u201314, , \u201324, , , \u201341,  n.28,  n.3,  n.61,  n.44,  n.49,  nn.3, ,  n.31,  n.18,  n.36,  nn.71, , ,  n.88,  nn.104, ,  n.6\n\nSchwartz, Barry, , ,  n.51,  n.50,  n.32,  nn.90\u201394\n\nsecurity, , , \u201383, , ,  n.33\n\nself-complexity, \u201341\n\nself-esteem, , \u201328, \u201333\n\nSeligman, Martin, , , , , \u201347, , ,  n.21,  n.26,  n.30,  nn.58, , ,  n.47,  nn.99, ,  n.37\n\nset point. _See_ happiness, set point\n\nsexual activity and happiness, \u201322, \u201328, , , , ,  n.14\n\nsocial justice, , , ,\n\nsolo practice, , , , , ,\n\nStanford students. _See_ Building a Better Legal Profession\n\nstrengths, identifying, , , \u20138, , \u201347, , -238,  n.54,  n.99\n\nstress, \u201331, \u201356, , \u201381, ,\n\nsurrogation, \u2013103, , \u201353, \u20139\n\nsurveys, x, \u20137, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , \u201385, , , , , , , , , \u201373, \u201380, , \u201395,  nn.1, ,  nn.5, , \u201347 n.11,  nn.12, ,  n.35,  nn. , ,  n.55,  n.3,  nn.6, ,  nn.21, ,  n.4,  nn.50, ,  n.87,  n.63,  n.71,  n.114, , n.13\n\nTellegen, Auke, ,  nn.25\u201326\n\n\"Three Question Process\" (for job searches), \u201347\n\ntools to build a happier practice, xi, , \u2013111, \u2013207\n\ntrial attorneys, \u201317, , , \u201320, \u201328\n\ntransactional work, \u201317, , , \u201328\n\ntrust, xi, , \u201340, , , \u201395, , , , , \u201389, \u201314, , ,  n.43\n\nunhappiness, work related, \u20137, \u201315, \u201335, \u201367, \u201378, \u201386, , \u20137, \u201364, \u201377, \u201395, \u201311, \u201318, \u201321,\n\n_See also_ happiness (and unhappiness); lawyers, unhappiness\n\nValliant, George, ,\n\nvalues, xii, , , , \u201353, , , , , \u20139, , \u201317, , \u201334, \u201342, \u201348, \u201355, \u201359, , , , , \u201321, , , , \u201337,  n.38,  n.61,  n.22,  n.51,  nn.99,\n\nVeenhoven, Ruut, ,  n.2,  n.38\n\nvirtues, six, \u201347\n\nWeiner, Eric, ,  n.21,  n.31,  n.16\n\nWilson, Eric G., ,  n.5\n\nwork-life balance, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , \u201381, , , , , \u201313, , ,  n.40,  nn.71,\n\nWorld Database of Happiness, , ,  n.2,  n.2\n","meta":{"redpajama_set_name":"RedPajamaBook"}}
+{"text":" \n#  \nCopyright \u00a9 2010, 2015 by Lamar Underwood and Nate Matthews\n\nAll rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner without the express written consent of the publisher, except in the case of brief excerpts in critical reviews or articles. All inquiries should be addressed to Skyhorse Publishing, 307 West 36th Street, 11th Floor, New York, NY 10018.\n\nSkyhorse Publishing books may be purchased in bulk at special discounts for sales promotion, corporate gifts, fund-raising, or educational purposes. Special editions can also be created to specifications. For details, contact the Special Sales Department, Skyhorse Publishing, 307 West 36th Street, 11th Floor, New York, NY 10018 or info@skyhorsepublishing.com.\n\nSkyhorse\u00ae and Skyhorse Publishing\u00ae are registered trademarks of Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.\u00ae, a Delaware corporation.\n\nVisit our website at www.skyhorsepublishing.com.\n\n10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1\n\nLibrary of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data\n\nUnderwood, Lamar.\n\n250 amazing hunting tips : the best tactics and techniques to get your game this season : deer,. bear,. waterfowl,. small game, and more! \/ Lamar Underwood and Nate Matthews ; illustrations by John Rice.\n\npages cm\n\nISBN 978-1-63220-303-8 (pbk. : alk. paper) \u2014 ISBN 978-1-63220-950-4 (ebook) 1. Hunting\u2014Handbooks, manuals, etc. I. Matthews, Nate. II. Title. III. Title: Two hundred and fifty amazing hunting tips.\n\nSK33.U527 2015\n\n639'.1\u2014dc23\n\n2015021854\n\nPrinted in the United States of America\n\n#  \nContents\n\nIntroduction\n\n1. White-tailed Deer Hunting\n\n2. Elk Hunting\n\n3. Mule Deer Hunting\n\n4. Bear Hunting\n\n5. Pig Hunting\n\n6. Moose Hunting\n\n7. Caribou Hunting\n\n8. Pronghorn Antelope Hunting\n\n9. Wild Sheep and Mountain Goat Hunting\n\n10. Turkey Hunting\n\n11. Duck Hunting\n\n12. Goose Hunting\n\n13. Grouse and Woodcock Hunting\n\n14. Pheasant Hunting\n\n15. Quail Hunting\n\n16. Squirrel Hunting\n\n17. Rabbit Hunting\n\nIntroduction\n\nThe other evening, after I had spent the day going over material for this book, my wife made a remark that brought doubt and fear crashing into my thoughts like lightning bolts. She simply said, \"The newspaper had a section today called '101 Grilling Tips.' I looked at them all and didn't find a single one to be useful.\"\n\nSuddenly, I felt almost ill. I thought about picking up the phone and calling Nate Matthews, my co-editor and writer on this book. Was a fate similar to \"101 Grilling Tips\" in store for our book\u2014multiplied two and a half times? Were our tips destined to be ignored, cast aside with shrugs and expressions of disappointment? It didn't seem possible, yet there it was: the possibility that we would not connect with our audience.\n\nInstead of allowing my anguish to continue unabated, I decided to look at \"101 Grilling Tips\" myself. I only liked a couple of the tips. The others were bland, without any juice to make me want to whip the cover off the Weber. My confidence in the work Nate and I were finishing began to rise again. Later, over the next few days as I gave our tips a final reading, that confidence level peaked out again. Today, ready to commit our tips to print, I guarantee our readers that they are going to find many, many useful tips. And I shall go even further by saying that many of the tips are so important that they mean the difference between success and failure on your hunt.\n\nYes, a single tip on hunting can carry that kind of importance behind it. If followed, it can mean you're literally bringing home the bacon. Ignored or forgotten, it can mean you're coming home only with that tired old expression, \"Sure was nice being in the woods today.\" Yea . . . sure . . . it was nice. There's no disputing that. But you have nothing new to put into the freezer.\n\nAllow me, if you will, to try to press my point about tips home with an example.\n\nMy personal deer hunting education was slow in evolving. I'm an Army brat, who grew up mostly in the south where my hunting was focused on smoothbore opportunities. Using dogs to drive deer to standers was still in vogue back then and never appealed to me, especially with the great hunting we had for quail, doves, ducks, squirrels, and rabbits.\n\nThere came a long-awaited morning, however, when as a young man I became a serious player in the great game known as whitetail deer hunting. I was settled against the trunk of an enormous white oak in the heart of classic whitetail country among the folded hills and ridges of Pennsylvania. Under a flashlight's glow, with my friend Larry's direction, I had swept aside leaves and sticks to make my nest as quiet as possible. I had a pack with a thermos and sandwiches, and in my hands rested a Winchester lever-action .30-30 with iron sights. The rifle triggered memories of the Daisy Red Ryder I had grown up using. When I was all set, Larry moved away to work another part of the ridge.\n\nAt first light, the horizon was cut from steel\u2014black lumps of white pines, the knife-like rim of a distant ridge looming above the forest. Without wind, the stillness seemed almost electric as I shivered in the cold, nervous to the raw edge at the thought of a buck coming my way.\n\nWhen the crows began to patrol, their raucous cries announcing that it was time for things to get moving, I detected the rustle of squirrels in the branches overhead. As the light came on, I began to hear occasional gunshots, echoing from the distant ridge.\n\nThe gunfire made me nervous. For some time, I had been hearing about reckless deer hunters, shooting at anything that moved. \"Oh, I had a couple of brush shots.\" That often-repeated comment wasn't funny to me.\n\nSuddenly, the sound of a limb breaking jerked my attention toward the trees to my left. I strained to see. Nothing! The sound came again, louder still, and followed this time by the dry rustle of leaves beings shuffled. I could only think of one thing that could make that much noise in the deer woods: another hunter! I was suddenly very, very afraid. I stood up, waving and shouting, \"Hi there!\"\n\nThere was a moment of total silence. Then, in an explosion of crashing brush, the buck of my dreams bounced into the full light in a clearing between the pines, white tail flagging, then was instantly gone before I could even think of raising my rifle.\n\nI stood there, stunned, hurt to the core. I was thinking terrible thoughts about myself. About being stupid, fumbling the ball, blowing my big chance. I was sure I would never have such an opportunity again.\n\nI felt like heading for our car, going home. But I sat back down instead, trying to get a grip on myself. I had no faith that another chance would come my way, but I knew the game would not be over until sundown. I would play it out, give Lady Luck a chance to shine on me again.\n\nGradually, the forest worked its therapy on my beleaguered spirit. Bird activity was plentiful\u2014 crows, blue jays, chickadees, woodpeckers, juncos were on the move and calling. As always when I'm on a stand, they furnished a interesting sideshow during the hours of waiting for game to show. Then, about noontime, I noticed that the squirrels were moving as industriously as they had been at dawn. Strange, I thought, there must be some dirty weather around. I can't see it coming, but they can feel it coming.\n\nI knew I was getting back into the groove then, focused on nature instead of myself. I dug into my pack for the sandwiches and coffee. They were very satisfying. I felt my confidence rising, and I realized now I owned something precious: the image of that buck in the clearing between the pines, the light full on what William Faulkner in a hunting tale called \". . . that rocking chair he carried.\"\n\nI did not get my \"rocking chair\" buck that day. That night, it snowed, and two days later I shot a fork-horn buck. For the first time in my life\u2014though certainly not the last\u2014I found myself saying to the other fellows, \"Well, boys, you can't eat horns.\"\n\nAs for the buck of my dreams . . . he would have to wait. And I could not help but think, rather bitterly: Why didn't Larry tell me: Bucks can make considerable noise when they're out for a morning stroll and haven't been disturbed. One single tip . . . that's all it would have taken. A tip I did not have.\n\nIf you've ever used the expression \"I'd rather be lucky than good,\" then you just might be a whitetail deer hunter. You're a card-carrying dreamer out to beat the odds, your heart set on a rack for the wall and a freezer where packets of venison take up most of the room. You're not discouraged by the possibility that this may not be your year to bag a buck, for the pull of the deer woods and deer camp are strong. You've just got to be out there, watching the weather, checking for sign, enjoying the company of good buddies.\n\nThat the task of bagging a whitetail buck\u2014any buck!\u2014requires skills is obvious to the brethren of Hunter Orange. While they are animals of fairly rigid habit, whitetail deer are interesting and complex creatures prone to a witch's brew\u2014for hunters anyway\u2014of contradictory behavioral patterns that are sometimes hard to understand and impossible to predict. When you think you have a lock on where they're feeding, they move to some other dining halls in another part of the forest or croplands. The white oak patch where you scouted a buck feeding a week before turns out to be empty on opening day\u2014except for its colony of squirrels. This list of failed game plans could go on and on.\n\nYou think you know what the deer will be doing. Perhaps you do. But all too often it seems like they're doing it somewhere else\u2014somewhere you don't know about! And don't think for a minute that your quarry doesn't know you're coming.\n\nOpening Day. The pre-dawn explodes with noise, like a bomb going off. A deer, especially a veteran \"survivor\" buck, would have to be deaf not to know what's going on. The cacophony includes the sounds of engines being revved up, wheels spinning in the mud, truck and SUV doors slamming, the snick-snick of gun actions being worked, and a myriad of shouts, \"Hey, Joe, you goin' to the Oak Tree stand?\" \"I'll meet you at noon by the apple orchard.\" \"Oh no, I forgot my shells!\"\n\nWell, perhaps we can get lucky. Happens all the time. Just drop by any check-in station, and you'll see people there who wouldn't know a scrape from a hog wallow. Nevertheless, they will have tags on bucks.\n\nThe goal Nate Matthews and I have set for ourselves is to give you something to cut the odds on your next hunt, for whatever game interests you\u2014whitetail deer, mallards, pheasants, moose, you name it.\n\nNate and I come your way from a background of working with some of the most highly respected magazines in the outdoor field\u2014Field & Stream, Sports Afield, and Outdoor Life. We do not present ourselves as experts in the various hunts we cover. But we know the people who are\u2014and you will find them in the pages ahead.\n\nIf you feel lucky, I'm sure you will carry that on your next hunt. As I have suggested, Lady Luck makes a fine companion. Nate and I hope, however, that you will be taking some of these tips along to supplement the Lady's efforts. You might be on a deer stand at dawn and hear something shuffling your way, breaking sticks, making noise. Sounds like another hunter, except . . . oh yes . . . there was this tip you heard somewhere. About bucks sometimes making noise instead of sneaking in. You keep watching . . . and then raise your gun. Yes!\n\nSometimes, just the right tip is all you need to have a great day.\n\nGood luck!\n\n\u2014Lamar Underwood\nCHAPTER 1\n\nWhite-tailed Deer Hunting\n\n1. Don't Shoot Bucks That Look Insecure\n\nWhen you first see a buck, take a moment to check its posture. Dominant bucks hold their heads high and walk loosely with their tails held straight out. A subordinate buck walks with stiff legs and a hunched back, and keeps its tail between its legs. If you see a good buck in a subordinate posture, consider holding your shot. It could mean there's a real monster in the area.\n\n2. Find Small Bucks Near Big Scrapes\n\nIf you're looking to shoot a buck quickly during the rut and aren't much concerned about the size of its antlers, look for a large scrape that's torn up, irregularly shaped, and looks like it's being used by more than one deer. Younger, more submissive bucks frequent such scrapes. Since these bucks are less wary and more numerous than trophy animals, you'll stand a good chance of filling your tag faster than you would when hunting scrapes made by solitary (and often bigger) deer.\n\n3. The Surefire Spot for Big Bucks\n\nDon't give up on a hunting spot when you learn a big whitetail has been taken there. If it was a dominant buck, a host of suitors for this vacated territory will soon move in. The sudden void may dramatically increase other bucks' activity. If you can hunt where another hunter has already bagged a big buck, do it!\n\n4. See More Deer by Scanning an Area Twice\n\nImmediately after stopping at a vantage point, allow your eyes to relax and move them slowly back and forth over the surrounding terrain without focusing on any specific feature. Relaxed eyes automatically focus on any movement within their field of vision. If no deer are moving in your immediate vicinity, shift to a tightly focused analysis of every piece of cover you can see. Peer into the shadows, looking for pieces of deer\u2014bits of antler, the curve of an ear, or the horizontal line of a back. Move to your next vantage point once you're satisfied that you've probed all the places a deer might be hiding.\n\n5. Don't Use Too Much Freshly Collected Scent\n\nIf you plan to use scent collected from the glands of a freshly-killed deer, make sure to use less of it than you would of the bottled stuff. The fresh gland scent will be much more potent than what you can buy commercially.\n\n6. Three Steps to Proper Still-hunting\n\nProper still-hunting can be described as a three-step process. Step one is to stand motionless behind an object that will break up your outline while searching the surrounding area thoroughly for any sign that deer are present. Step two is to remain still and use your eyes to pick out a way forward that lets you place your feet on the quietest ground cover possible, such as bare rock, moss, wet leaves, or soft snow. Step three is to scan the woods for deer one more time, then slowly and silently navigate the route you've picked out. Repeat steps one through three until you find your buck. Do not rush. A good still-hunter will sometimes take an hour to traverse 100 yards of heavy cover.\n\n7. Catch Wary Peak-season Bucks Off Guard during Lunch\n\nBecause of increased pressure during the rut, mature bucks will often change their patterns to avoid hunter activity. Many will become nocturnal, but a significant number instead spend more time searching for does during the middle of the day, when most hunters are back at camp taking naps and eating lunch. Try sitting your stand during the hours before and after noon to catch these deer off guard.\n\n8. Use Different Routes to Your Deer Stand at Sunrise and Sunset\n\nNever walk through a crop field in the early morning when approaching a deer stand set up near its edge. Deer are likely feeding in this field under cover of darkness\u2014you will startle them if you don't take a back route to your stand. The opposite is true when you're approaching the same stand during the afternoon or evening hours. Deer are likely bedded in the cover you used to hide your approach in the morning, waiting for the sun to go down before moving out to feed. You should approach your stand through the field at this time of the day.\n\n9. Guess a Deer's Sex by Analyzing Its Gait\n\nYou can tell buck tracks from doe tracks more easily when tracking deer through the snow. Does place their feet with precision; bucks sway from side to side while walking, a rolling gait that often leaves drag marks in powder. Longer drag marks may mean you've found the trail of an older or heavier buck.\n\n10. Hunt Near Food Sources When the Barometer Starts Dropping\n\nWhite-tailed deer feed heavily in the days and hours leading up to the arrival of violent low-pressure systems. Watch your barometer. When the pressure starts dropping, head to the edges of crop fields and alfalfa meadows, or to stands of mature oak where the ground is covered with acorns. As the front gets closer, start hunting from stands set up along trails that lead from these food sources to heavy cover where you know deer go to hunker down during nasty weather.\n\n11. Flush Big Bucks from beneath Downed Trees\n\nWhen still-hunting through mature forest during hot weather, keep your eyes peeled for large trees that have been uprooted recently by storms. The maze of shade and cover offered by the fallen limbs and branches provides one of the best hiding places in the forest, and big bucks will often bed down deep within their embrace to escape the heat of the day. Experienced animals feel very secure in such cover and may not flush unless you get extremely close to them. Approach every such tree you can find.\n\n12. Don't Get Too Hot to Sit Still in Cold Weather\n\nWhen hiking out to your tree stand in cold weather, do not wear all the layers you'll need to stay warm while sitting still. Doing so will cause you to sweat heavily on the way in, and this sweat will cool quickly once you stop moving, leaving you too chilled to remain quiet for long. Dress lightly and carry your outer layers in a backpack. Pull on warmer clothing only after you've climbed up into your stand and sat long enough for your heart rate to slow down.\n\n13. Read Rub Lines to Anticipate a Buck's Movements at Different Times of the Day\n\nRubs can show you to where, at what time of the day, and in what direction a buck normally travels. When you first find a rub, get down on your knees so that your field of vision is similar to that of the buck that made the rub. Scan for additional rubs in the area\u2014chances are good you'll find another from thirty to fifty yards away. Repeat this process until you've identified a series of rubs, called a rub line. Rub lines often mark the routes a buck uses to travel to and from his preferred feeding and bedding areas. Most rubs in a line will be made on the same side of each tree; this tells you the direction the buck travels when using the route. If the line leads from a feeding area to thick bedding cover, set up a stand nearby and hunt there in the morning. If the line leads away from bedding cover, hunt it in the evening.\n\n14. Hunt All Three Phases of the Rut\n\nA good deer hunter knows that there is not just one rut, but three. The first, called the pre-rut, occurs in early October, when mature, four- and five-year-old does first come into estrus. The second, known as the peak or primary rut, runs from late October to the last week of November, and is when the majority of female deer come into heat. The third, called the post-rut or late rut, takes place twenty-eight days after the end of the primary rut, as does that were not bred during October and November come back into estrus. These pre- and post-rut phases do not last long. Look for a sudden explosion of fresh buck sign, then hunt hard for several days using techniques, such as rattling, that take advantage of the increased aggression triggered by competition for a limited number of willing does.\n\n15. Gain Extra Seconds to Shoot When Rattling in a Buck\n\nBucks will often appear at the most inopportune moments, especially when you're rattling antlers to call them in. If you spot one while holding a rack in your hands, don't be afraid to put it down and pick up your gun. The buck you've called will be expecting to see some motion and will be less likely to startle immediately when he sees you, which gives you a few extra moments to shoot him. Using one smooth, unhurried motion, pick up your rifle, shoulder it, and fire. Make sure that you do not move too fast or jerk your arms, rifle, or body. Such sudden movements signal your excitement and may alarm the animal.\n\n16. Let Blood Color Tell You How Fast to Follow a Wounded Buck\n\nBlood trails don't just tell you the direction a wounded deer is moving. They can also provide good information about where on its body you shot the animal, and how quickly you should follow its trail. Bright red blood is full of oxygen and often means you've hit your deer in the lungs. Deer hit this way don't go far, so you can pursue them quickly. Dark red or purple blood may indicate a gut shot. If you find such blood, particularly in conjunction with bits of intestinal fat, and there's no precipitation forecast that could wash away or obscure the trail, consider giving the animal time to bed down and stiffen up before looking for a follow-up shot. Gut-shot deer often run long distances if they're chased immediately after being wounded.\n\n17. Tie Back Branches When Hanging Your Tree Stand\n\nWhile a good pair of pruning shears can be a bowhunter's best friend, there are many situations in which you should refrain from overclipping. For example, when setting up your tree stand, it is a good idea to try tying back any branches that obstruct your view, using a length of rope or wire. This method is quieter than clipping, will cause less damage to the tree you're using, and the branches can often be more easily positioned behind your stand in order to break up your silhouette.\n\n18. Find Deer in Transition Zones\n\nDuring the end of October and in early November, before the peak of the rut, deer switch from grazing in fields to browsing on twigs, branches, and buds. These foods are most easily found in wide transition zones of thick understory that grow up between mature forests and more open fields and meadows, where the shade cast by tall trees is not deep enough to inhibit the growth of younger saplings. The thick growth also serves as cover for the animals after leaves have fallen from the branches of more mature timber. Set your stand near deer trails close to rubs or scrapes in these transition zones, and you'll have a good chance of filling your tag.\n\n19. Still-Hunt Uphill in the Early Morning\n\nOn calm days when there's little wind, air will flow downhill as it cools in the evening, and uphill as it heats up during the day. Deer use these currents to keep track of their surroundings. To keep them off your scent, hunt your way uphill in the late evening and early morning hours, and down during the rest of the day.\n\n20. Hunt in Three Places at Once\n\nOne of the best locations to hunt is the intersection of three different types of vegetation. Look for a field corner bounded by timber on one side and a swamp, slough, or bottomland on the other, then hang your stand in a tree with a good view of any trails that lead from one to the other.\n\n21. Don't Hang Your Stand Too High in Steep Terrain\n\nWhile hanging your stand high in a tree will better hide your presence in level terrain, doing so in steep, hilly country may actually put you at eye level with deer working down the ridges you're hunting. Try lowering your stand to camouflage your silhouette in such conditions. A deer looking downhill will have a more difficult time spotting you against a backdrop of leaf litter than it will spotting you against the sky.\n\n22. Use Hunting Pressure on Public Land to Your Advantage\n\nIf you hunt public land that gets lots of pressure during the prime shotgun or rifle season, you're going to run into other hunters in the woods. Instead of letting them ruin your hunt, figure out how to use them to your advantage. Set your stand up on trails leading to thick cover near routes you know other hunters are using. Deer will flee to these areas when spooked by all the unusual sights, sounds, and smells in the woods, so you'll be in a good position to catch them as they sneak through.\n\n23. A Basic Rule for Knowing When to Move and When to Sit Still\n\nWhen you know deer are on the move, such as in the morning and evening hours, you should sit still in a good stand or other ambush point and wait for the animals to come to you. It is only during conditions in which deer stop moving that you should move to find them.\n\n24. Develop a Quiet Stride for Still-Hunting\n\nMaintaining proper balance is the key to walking quietly across the forest floor. A long stride combined with little forward momentum will often leave you tipping to one side or the other, which can force you to place your feet awkwardly as you catch your balance. To reduce the noise you make, learn to take smaller steps, and to place your feet heel or toe first. Shift your weight slowly onto your forward leg while rolling your foot from heel to toe (or toe to heel). When performed properly, this movement\u2014called the rolling compression step\u2014will allow you to feel any twigs, branches, or other objects that might make noise before you place your full weight on them. This lets you shift your weight to your back leg before the object snaps, then place your front foot in a new, less noisy spot.\n\n25. Analyze Stomach Contents to Pattern Feeding Behavior\n\nIt's a good idea to examine the stomach contents of a deer you've shot. Less-digested food is what the deer ate last; well-digested food was eaten earlier in the day. You can use this information to guess where the deer was feeding in the hours before you killed it, and then apply what you've learned toward filling any open tags you or your buddies still have.\n\n26. Easy Way to Check the Wind\n\nSave a few of the black neck feathers from your next ruffed grouse\u2014or the lightest feathers you can pick off doves, pheasants, or quail if they're your favorite birds. Hung from a bow limb with a piece of dental floss, a light feather is a great wind direction indicator.\n\n27. Don't Scare Big Bucks out of Bedding Sites\n\nIf you've located a good buck before the season, resist the urge to hunt him in his bedding site. This is almost certain to drive a wary trophy animal out of the area. Instead, hunt the travel zones between his bedding and feeding spots.\n\n28. Gauge How Well Your Stand Is Hidden Using Black-and-White Images\n\nA good way to tell if your stand or blind is well concealed is to photograph yourself sitting in it during the exact hours of the day you think you'll be hunting from it. Use a digital camera, and convert your images from color to black-and-white using the image-processing program on your computer. Deer are colorblind, so these black-and-white images will give you a good idea of the patterns, shapes, and tones that seem out of place. If you and your stand are easily recognizable, reconfigure its position and make sure that it is not too bright or too dark compared to its surroundings.\n\n29. Practice with Your Bow in Hunting Situations\n\nAlways practice shooting your bow under the same conditions in which you expect to shoot your deer. You may be able to stick five arrows into a circle the size of your fist at fifty yards when you're standing on flat ground and wearing a T-shirt, but that won't help you much if you don't know how to do the same thing while wearing a heavy jacket. Spend time during the preseason simulating live hunting situations. Use broadheads rather than field points, wear your hunting clothes, and practice shooting from awkward positions and elevated angles.\n\n30. Hunt Sleepy Bucks on Beds during a Full Moon\n\nWhen the moon is full and the sky is clear, white-tailed deer will feed heavily during the evening hours and move less often during the day than they will when the sky stays dark all night. Run drives through heavy cover or still-hunt other likely bedding areas after a well-lit night to increase your chances of filling your tag in such conditions.\n\n31. Watch a Feeding Deer's Tail\n\nFeeding deer always twitch their tails immediately before raising their heads to look around. If you immediately freeze when you see this motion, you'll be much less likely to alert the animal to your presence. Continue your stalk when the animal puts its head back down to feed.\n\n32. Look Downhill When Still-Hunting during Bad Weather\n\nThe best places to still-hunt during violent weather are found on elevated terrain. Benches crossing the sides of ridges make excellent routes to follow because they give you top-down looks into the kinds of thick cover where deer like to hole up. That extra field of view means you'll have more shots than you would if you were stalking through level ground, where the cover you're hunting will usually obstruct your line of sight.\n\n33. Don't Hang Your Stand Where You Find the Most Sign\n\nAreas chock-full of deer trails, droppings, rubs, and beds are not always the best places to hang your stand. The abundance of sign could mean that the area is being used as a sanctuary\u2014a place where deer congregate before heading out to feed, or where they bed down during the middle of the day. Since deer spend a great deal of time in such places, they become very familiar with them and will be sensitive to unusual sounds, smells, and sights. It can be extremely difficult to camouflage your presence under such conditions.\n\n34. Bagging a Lunchtime Buck\n\nSince most whitetail hunters are on their stands at first light, they tend to get restless from midmorning to noon. Many head back to camp, or their vehicles, seeking a sandwich and a chat with their buddies. That's when they inadvertently spook whatever deer are around, sending them sneaking away or bolting through the countryside. And that's exactly when hunters who have stayed on their stands, quiet and alert, reap the rewards of the biggest bucks.\n\n35. Use a Stick to Track Wounded Game over Sandy Soil\n\nSome soil types can absorb both tracks and blood, making trailing wounded deer difficult. If the trail you're following becomes indistinct, break off a straight stick that's the same length as the stride of the animal you're tracking. Place one end of the stick on the last clear track you can identify so that it's pointing in the direction you think the animal was traveling. Look for new tracks or flecks of blood at the other end.\n\n36. Sit Your Stand in the Morning When Hunting Hot Weather\n\nWhitetails are more active than normal during the night when the weather is unseasonably warm, and will stay bedded down in well-shaded cover that's close to a water source during the heat of the day. They may start moving again as the temperature starts dropping early in the evening, but when it's really hot the air won't begin to cool until well after darkness. The best time of the day to hunt deer during hot weather is during the first two hours of shooting light in the morning, when the air is coolest and you can catch your quarry moving from where they've been feeding to where they'll bed during daylight.\n\n37. Any Buck Is a Good Buck!\n\nIn my personal opinion, the concept of hunting only trophy deer seems misguided for most hunters. If you get a kick out of it, fine. Have at it. Most hunters, however, simply want to get out to the deer woods with the idea of bringing home a buck, any buck. The bigger the buck, the more thrills we might feel. But in the end, the old deer-hunting bromide is so, so true: You can't eat horns. My advice is to relax, enjoy your hunting, and stick to the premise that any buck is a good buck.\n\n38. Make Your Steps Sound like a Deer's to Spook Fewer Bucks\n\nThere are some situations in which it is impossible for you to walk silently through the woods. Dry leaves, for example, will crunch loudly no matter how carefully you place your feet. If you find it necessary to cover ground in such conditions (and there are no convenient game trails to follow that offer quieter places to walk), you will get closer to your quarry without spooking it if you learn how to pattern your steps so that they sound like the steps of a deer. Instead of a regular crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch (the standard human cadence), randomize the rhythm of your footsteps so that they form an erratic series of steps and pauses. Step, step, pause. Step. Pause. Wait. Step. Step. Step. Pause. And so on. You'll be much more likely to surprise bucks within shooting range if you use this pattern.\n\n39. Spot Bucks Down Low\n\nThe horizontal line of a whitetail's back is one of the best things to look for when still-hunting through thick brush. Most lines in the woods are vertical, and while you'll eyeball a great many fallen logs by keying in on the horizontal lines, you'll have a better chance of locating a hidden deer this way than you would by looking for a whole animal. Remember, though, that even mature bucks stand only three feet at the shoulder, so don't raise your eyes any higher than this when scanning the area ahead of you.\n\n40. Don't Face Your Stand at the Sun\n\nWhen placing your tree stand, avoid setting it up so that it faces a rising or falling sun. The rays beaming directly into your eyes will make it harder for you to see into shadows during critical low-light hours, and will glance off glasses, gun barrels, and reflective items, spooking deer that would otherwise be unlikely to spot you.\nCHAPTER 2\n\nElk Hunting\n\n41. How to Field-Judge a Bull Elk\n\nIf you're looking for a trophy elk, you need to be able to quickly judge the quality of its antlers before taking a shot at the animal. You can do this in three steps. First, try to count the points. A true trophy will have no fewer than six points on each side. Second, gauge the length of each antler's beam. A good bull should look as if it can tip back its head to scratch its rear end with the tips of his beams. Third, make sure that the bull's brow tines reach out over its muzzle, and that the other points have good length.\n\n42. Don't Scout for Elk like You Scout for Deer\n\nUnless you're hunting on private land, patterning an elk herd's activities before hunting season can be a waste of time. Elk react quickly to hunting pressure, and such pressure can be enormous on public lands, especially during the days leading up to the first of the season, when other hunters are out in force. Instead of scouting to identify a herd's normal, unstressed behaviors, focus your efforts on identifying where they go when spooked by the presence of other hunters. Look for heavy blowdown cover on steep slopes that are relatively close to meadows surrounded by thick timber. Elk feeding in these meadows will head toward such escape areas when startled. Identify good ambush sites along the likely routes they take, and you stand a good chance of shooting an animal pushed out by another hunter.\n\n43. Don't Let Elk Spot You Twice in the Same Spot\n\nIf you notice an elk in the herd you're hunting suddenly stop chewing its cud to stare at your position, the ideal response is to immediately stop all movement, no matter how awkward the position you're in, and remain motionless until it turns its head away. There will be times, however, when it will be impossible to stay still long enough for the animal that's spotted you to lose interest. If you must move to a more comfortable position, your best option is to lower yourself as slowly as possible to the ground. Lie there as long as necessary, then crawl to a new position before raising your head to take stock of the situation. Even if the elk did not spook, it will still be monitoring the spot where it saw you move.\n\n44. There's Only One Place to Shoot an Elk with a Bow\n\nIf you're hunting elk with a bow, the best shot to take is easy to remember, because there's only one ethical target to choose. Neck shots, shoulder shots, or shots at any other part of an elk's body are not recommended; to kill an elk quickly with a bow, you must shoot it directly behind its shoulder, piercing its heart and\/or lungs.\n\n45. Secure Your Elk's Carcass on Steep Slopes\n\nIf an elk you've shot falls on the side of a steep slope, your first action after making sure the animal is dead should always be to secure the carcass to a solid anchor, such as a tree trunk, using a stout length of rope. The last thing you want is for the animal's body to slide downhill, which could damage the meat and\/or put it at the bottom of a ravine where you'll have to work twice as hard to pack it out.\n\n46. Catch Elk Moving from Their Food to Their Beds\n\nThe worst time to still-hunt for elk is at midday, when they will be bedded down in thick cover that they've chosen because it is impossible to approach without them seeing or smelling you. You'll have more luck spotting them before they spot you if you still-hunt during the early morning and late afternoon, when elk are moving from the meadows and clearings where they feed to the heavy evergreen cover where they often prefer to bed, and vice versa.\n\n47. Bark like a Cow to Stop Startled Elk\n\nYou can briefly stop a spooked herd of elk by imitating the sound of a barking cow. A cow barks when she is alarmed. Other elk in the area will instinctively stop and look at her until she's identified the danger and run off, and then will follow her lead in exiting the area. If you're within range and have identified your target, use the moment when they stop and stare to take your shot.\n\n48. Spot Late Season Bulls at High Elevation\n\nLate in the season, you'll often find small groups of older bulls at higher elevations, where the snow is deep and the terrain is open. These bulls may be quite far from the rest of the herd, as much as a mile or more. Glass for them from below. When you spot such a group, try to pattern where the bulls feed and bed. Then set up a stalk to fit what you've observed. When planning your stalk, remember that if you spook the animals they will likely run to the nearest trees for shelter. If you're hunting in a group, post hunters along the tree line to intercept them.\n\n49. How to Recognize Elk Tracks\n\nElk tracks look like very large deer tracks, and a mature bull's prints will be much larger than those left by female or juvenile elk. Make sure that you do not confuse elk tracks with those left by moose or cows. Cow tracks are rounded and do not look much like those of a deer, and moose tracks are longer and narrower than those left by elk. Study a guidebook (or this illustration) before you hunt to avoid this problem.\n\nFrom left to right: bull elk, bull moose, cow elk, and juvenile elk tracks\n\n50. The Top Ten Elk States (by Elk Population)\n\nColorado: 200,000\n\nMontana: 150,000\n\nIdaho: 140,000\n\nOregon: 106,000\n\nWyoming: 85,000\n\nWashington: 60,000\n\nArizona: 55,000\n\nUtah: 50,000\n\nNew Mexico: 45,000\n\nCalifornia: 7,500\n\n51. Keep Predators Away from Your Kill with a Smoky Fire\n\nIf you are hunting elk on foot and shoot one far from the road, you will have to make more than one trip to pack out the meat, leaving the remaining meat alone in the backcountry. One way to keep bears, wolves, coyotes, and other predators from stealing your kill while you are away is to build a small, smoky fire from damp, pitchy wood near the quarters you had to leave behind. The smoke will help scare away predators, and you can use the plume to locate your kill quickly when you return to collect the rest of the animal. Make sure to do this only where it's both legal and safe, and never leave a fire untended in dry conditions where there is any possible risk that it might spread.\n\n52. Don't Bugle Too Often\n\nA bugling bull makes an impressive sound, and one that's not hard to reproduce using today's commercial calls. Because of this, and because many hunters have the unrealistic expectation that bulls often charge headlong toward the sound of a challenge, the bugle is the most overused call in an elk hunter's repertoire. Instead of relying on bugling to draw in a rutting bull, it's a better idea to use the call just to locate one, especially if you're hunting an area that gets lots of pressure. Once you've found a responsive bull, try to close with him by using other means. Call him in using cow calls, imitate the sounds of raking antlers, or even stalk silently downwind into shooting range.\n\n53. Change Vantage Points to Fully Scope an Area\n\nDon't dismiss an area as empty of game if you don't see any elk from a particular vantage point. You should always scope out an area from at least two positions so that you can view pockets and basins where elk may be feeding that are not easily identified from the beaten path. Changing vantage points takes work, and that's one reason why it can be such a successful tactic; most hunters won't be willing to make the effort and allow their desire for an easy hunt to let them dismiss an area before they've covered it fully. Use this to your advantage when hunting on public land.\n\n54. Approach Bedded Elk from Above\n\nElk like to bed in flat spots on side ridges where they can see well to the left, right, and downhill, and are high enough to feel comfortable that nothing will be approaching from behind. If you're following one's track and it suddenly turns upslope, it could mean the elk is ready to bed. Avoid following its tracks any longer, as the animal will be paying close attention to its back trail. Instead, circle uphill, staying downwind of the trail, and try to approach where you think the elk has lain down from above.\n\n55. Critical Advice to Elk Hunters\n\nCalling elk in areas of heavy hunting pressure may be counterproductive. Bugling will draw other hunters, and bulls that have been called in and spooked wise up quickly. It is better to simply spot the bulls, then stalk them.\n\n56. Look in Wet Meadows for Feeding Elk\n\nAlways pay close attention to wet meadows when looking for feeding elk. These small, moist clearings are rich in forbs and sedges, forage elk prefer. Wet meadows surrounded by thick timber are best; elk feeding in them will feel more secure when such cover is available, and will often feed later in the morning than they might in less accommodating terrain.\n\n57. Call Back Elk from a Busted Herd\n\nIf you flush a herd of elk while still-hunting and it splinters into multiple groups, you can use the animals' desire to herd back up to call them to you. If the animals did not smell you when first flushed, they will slow down and take stock of the situation from a few hundred yards away. Get out your cow call and blow it softly, imitating the sounds other cows make when they're regrouping. If a cow answers you, answer back, though wait for a few seconds first. If you do this right, the elk will think you're part of the group and will work back slowly in your direction.\n\n58. It Takes Two to Tag a Called-In Elk\n\nThe textbook method of calling a bull into bow range requires two hunters. One serves as the caller, the other as the shooter. The shooter sets up in the shadows of a tree or some other type of cover with a good view of the path the bull should take. The caller sets up twenty to thirty yards upwind of the shooter. Since most bulls will approach the caller by circling downwind, they should appear directly in front of the shooter.\n\n59. A Hot Weather Hot Spot for Daytime Elk\n\nWhen the weather is hot, look for elk taking shelter in forests of mature evergreens that have few low branches. The forest canopy protects the animals from direct sunlight, while the open understory lets in cool breezes.\n\n60. Find Elk in the Open after Bad Weather\n\nUnder most conditions, it is unusual to see elk feeding in the open during the middle of the day. The exception to this is if a period of strong winds or heavy rain or snow lets up at this time, or if the sun peaks through the clouds and warms up a slope that's been very cold. Elk will have been hunkered down, waiting out the bad weather, and will often feed heavily for a few hours once conditions improve. These are great times to glass food sources, trails, and bedding cover for movement.\n\nCHAPTER 3\n\nMule Deer Hunting\n\n61. Let Low Light Show You Hidden Deer\n\nThe best time to glass for mule deer is as the sun first appears early in the morning. The low-angle light causes the hair on their coats and light-colored rumps to glow, and will also gleam on the tines of a big buck's antlers. Low-angled evening light is also good for locating mule deer, but glassing in the late afternoon leaves you little time to stalk within range before the sun goes down.\n\n62. Glass Your Route before You Stalk\n\nSpotting mule deer is perhaps the easiest part of spot-and-stalk hunting. The stalk is just as important, and much more physically demanding. If you spot a bedded buck, don't immediately start moving into shooting range. First make sure that you're familiar with the route you're planning to take to get there. The best way to do this is to glass it thoroughly before packing up and moving out. Pick out landmarks you'll be able to identify (look for ones that can be recognized from multiple angles), and make sure to remember where they are in relation to where the animal is bedded down. Start your stalk once you've established a clear mental picture of the path you think will put you in a downwind location with a clear shot at the buck.\n\n63. Meandering Tracks Mean Beds Are Close\n\nIf a mule deer is traveling from a food source to bedding cover its trail will generally lead in a straight line (taking terrain into account). But as the animal approaches its bedding site it often starts to meander through the cover, nibbling on twigs and looking for a spot to lie down. If you're tracking a muley and see its trail start to wander, turn around and backtrack for a few hundred yards, then climb above where you think the animal has bedded down so that you can approach from a higher elevation. You'll get closer to the deer and will have a better shot at the animal if you spook it.\n\n64. Don't Shoot Deer You Can't Reach\n\nOne of the worst mistakes a mule deer hunter can make is shooting a buck on the other side of a ravine or canyon without knowing whether it's possible to retrieve the animal. Vertical cliffs, deep rivers, and maze-like canyons are difficult obstacles to negotiate, and some are impossible to cross. Make sure you know the terrain you're hunting before you take a shot like this.\n\n65. Mule Deer Prefer Sagebrush\n\nIf you're hunting in unfamiliar territory, one of the best places to look for muleys is in thick patches of sagebrush. Mule deer seem to prefer this plant throughout their range. Pay special attention to patches you find in places where sagebrush is relatively rare; the plant will act like a magnet for muleys in the area.\n\n66. Get in a Mule Deer's Zone\n\nAccording to Dennis Wintch, mule deer editor for Hunting Illustrated magazine, most mule deer habitat can be broken up into three distinct zones: a high zone (8,000 to 12,000 feet), a middle zone (5,000 to 8,000 feet), and a low zone (1,000 to 5,000 feet). Mule deer cycle through these zones depending on weather, hunting pressure, and food availability. The trick is to figure out which zone they're currently inhabiting. If you're hunting in a new area, look for fresh tracks and follow them until you're confident you know which level the deer are currently using.\n\n67. Getting the Range Right under the Big Sky\n\nThe most difficult adjustment easterners make when hunting the West for the first time is adjusting to the scale of thing. Deer tend to be significantly larger than what East Coasters are used to. Elk are five or six times better. Guesstimating ranges is a real crap shoot. Better depend on a rangefinder when hunting the wide-open spaces.\n\n68. Catch Bucks Seeking Shade in the Middle of the Day\n\nWhile the most productive times to glass for mule deer will be during first hours of morning and the last hours of the day, you can still spot deer moving during the middle of the day if you know where to look. Bucks will often change bedding sites during the middle of the day as shade shifts with the sun's movement, sometimes browsing for a few minutes before they lay down again. You'll be most likely to catch this movement if you're already glassing cover for bedded deer. Look under trees and around brush for anything that seems out of place with it surroundings. When a buck stands up you'll be focused in the right place.\n\n69. Tag Team a Spot-and-Stalk\n\nOne of the best ways to stalk within range of a bedded mule deer is to leave a hunting partner behind at the place you first spotted the animal. Your partner can then use hand signals to guide you as you sneak into shooting range. He'll need to far enough away from the bedded deer to not startle it when moving his hands, so bring a pair of binoculars and use them to check on him for instructions at regular intervals.\n\n70. Let the Wind Settle into One Direction\n\nWind currents can be fickle before the sun rises, so it's a good idea to wait until later in the morning before planning a stalk on a buck you've spotted. In most open-country habitat, the wind will usually settle as the air heats up, blowing in a consistent direction that makes staying downwind of your target much simpler.\n\n71. Don't Let Your Bow Keep You from Creeping on Your Stomach\n\nCreeping to within shooting range of an open-country mule deer is one of the most difficult and exciting challenges in all of bowhunting, especially when there's only an open stretch of tall grass between you and the buck you're stalking. To close with your target in such terrain you'll need to inch forward on your stomach, keeping your head down and using only your elbows to pull yourself forward. But it can be difficult to remain silent when you're carrying a bulky, awkward bow in your hands. You can keep your arms moving freely by placing the bow on your back. When you're close enough to shoot, simply slide the bow into your hands, knock an arrow, sit up on your knees, and shoot quickly.\n\n72. Glass for Bucks in Comfort\n\nIt is very important that you situate yourself comfortably when glassing for mule deer. Choose a place to sit that has a solid back support, such as a big rock or a stump, and bring foam pad, or, if you can spare the weight, a small, folding tripod stool to keep your butt off cold, hard ground. You should also invest in a tripod with adjustable legs for your binoculars and\/or spotting scope, which will reduce the strain on your arms. Never spot for deer with your rifle scope; you'll end up pointing the muzzle of your gun at targets you do not want to shoot.\n\n73. Stalk When the Wind Blows Strongly\n\nIf you spot a buck bedded in grassy, open terrain, wait to stalk it until the middle of the day, when the wind usually blows steadiest and strongest. The strong wind will wave grass, leaves, and branches back and forth, and you can use these natural movements to camouflage your progress into shooting position. Wear a ghillie suit for further protection from a mule deer's sharp eyes; the loose strips of fabric attached to the suit will move with the wind, making you look that much more like a part of the landscape.\n\n74. Use the Right Binocular\/Spotting Scope Combination\n\nLarge, 11x80 or 20x80 binoculars of the type designed for stargazers make excellent mule deer spotting tools because they gather a great deal of light, giving you an excellent picture during the twilight hours, which is when most muleys will be moving. But if you're hiking long distances to reach your hunting areas, you won't want to carry such heavy glass. A good compromise is to use a smaller pair of 10x50 binoculars and also bring a small, 20- or 25-power spotting scope. The combined weight of both these optics will be less than the weight of the larger binoculars, and you can break the weight up by storing your scope in your pack as you hike. Use the binoculars to spot movement at long range, then use the scope to get a closer look at whatever caught your attention.\n\n75. Be Prepared to Hike Long Distances\n\nAlways wear a daypack when you hunt mule deer. You often have to cover long distances to find them in the open country they live in, and you don't want to get stuck far from your truck without the proper equipment when the weather changes suddenly, as it often does in the mountains. Make sure your pack fits well and is roomy enough to carry a change of clothes, rain gear, a good knife, rope, binoculars, a compass, a survival kit, and extra food and water. Bring your pack even when you think you'll be hunting close to your camp or your vehicle; you never know when a fresh track might take you deep into the backcountry.\n\n76. Locate Clear-Cuts to Find Feeding Mule Deer\n\nOne of the best places to hunt mule deer in evergreen forest habitat is a recently logged clear-cut. Deer-friendly shrubs and plants grow rapidly in these clearings as their roots penetrate the disturbed soil and their leaves soak up sunlight normally blocked by large trees. You may have to walk a few miles to reach such clear-cuts, as most logging roads on public lands will be closed to public vehicle traffic, but with unpressured, top-notch feeding habitat as your reward, the hike will be worth the effort. Contact your local BLM or Forest Service office to get information on where these cuts have taken place (you want cuts that are 10 years old or younger), and plan your hunt accordingly.\n\n77. Use Thermal Currents When Stalking Bedded Bucks\n\nEarly morning air that has been cooling all night tends to flow downhill; later in the morning, as this air heats up in the light of the sun, it will reverse direction. These uphill\/downhill flows are called thermal currents, and they are important to remember when stalking hot-weather bucks. If you're glassing a clearing for feeding deer at first light, make sure you're positioned so that no downhill currents will carry your scent to the animals. Later, as the deer move uphill to bed, plan your stalk so that you approach them from above.\n\n78. Look for Bucks in Edge Cover on the North Sides of Ridges\n\nA great place to look when you're spotting for bedded mule deer is edge cover (thick brush lining clearings or other openings in which deer can remain concealed while still enjoying a good view of their surroundings). Look first along the north sides of ridges, which generally get more shade. Since deer here will already be bedded down, try to pick out pieces of the animals. Ear flicks, hind-leg scratches, and antler-glints may be the only clues you'll have to find the buck you're hunting.\n\n79. See and Be Seen\n\nWhen glassing for mule deer, keep in mind that if you're sitting in a place with a 360-degree view of the surrounding terrain, deer on all sides will have a good view of you, as well. Make sure to hide your silhouette by sitting with a rock, some brush, or a stump at your back.\n\n80. Follow the Farthest Track\n\nMule deer are very alert to the sounds and smells of animals following their back trails and will spook easily if they see you before you see them. To make sure you get the drop on an animal you're tracking, avoid looking too closely at its individual prints. Instead, keep track of the overall trail by picking out the furthest clear track you can see, then still-hunting up to it, keeping your eyes peeled for movement in the distance. Repeat until you find your target.\nCHAPTER 4\n\nBear Hunting\n\n81. How to Tell a Grizzly Bear from a Black Bear before Taking a Shot\n\nWhen hunting bears in the western states you must be very good at distinguishing between black bears, which are huntable, and grizzlies, which are protected under federal law. Color is not a determining characteristic; many black bears exhibit the same blonde coloration often associated with grizzly bears, and many grizzly bears come in darker colors. Instead, a hunter should look for two things. The first is the presence of a distinct hump on the shoulders; grizzlies have one, black bears do not. A hunter should also try to get a good look at the animal's face in profile. A black bear's nose slopes down from its forehead in a straight line. A grizzly bear's forehead dips inward from the forehead before pushing out into its nose, giving its face an indented, slightly concave appearance.\n\n82. A Bear of Many Colors\n\nNot all black bears are black. They come in many color phases, including blonde, cinnamon, chocolate, and even pure white or blue. Hunt the eastern states if you want a black phase black bear; other color phases are rare east of the Mississippi. Hunt the western states for a brown, cinnamon, or blonde-phase black bear. White phase bears (known as Kermode or spirit bears) and blue phase bears (known as Glacier bears) are found in British Columbia, but are protected from hunting by law in the province. Glacier bears, however, are also found in Alaska and can be hunted there.\n\n83. Look for Crop-Raiding Bears\n\nIf you live in a state that will not allow you to hunt bears over bait, you'll need to figure out where the animals are naturally feeding. One easy way to do this is to canvas farmers in the area you're hunting to see if any of them are having problems with bears raiding their corn fields, gardens, or other crops. You'll get a head start on the scouting process, and get the added bonus of expanding the amount of land on which you have permission to hunt.\n\n84. The Best Time for Bear Pelts\n\nThe earlier in the spring you can shoot a bear, the better quality its hide will be. Bears shed their winter coats as the weather warms up, often rubbing against trees, rocks, and fence posts to scrape off unwanted hair. If you shoot one later in the spring it may have a patchy, scruffy-looking hide. Catch them close to when they leave their dens you'll get a much better-looking pelt.\n\n85. When Black Bears Attack\n\n\"Indian hunters will tell you that a fighting black is more to be feared than either the grizzly or Kodiak, for the reason that the latter two species seem always to be in a frantic hurry about mauling a man, while a black will rip and tear at a victim as long as there is a spark of life remaining. This explanation of the Kodiak's tactics may account for the number of men who have lived to tell the tale after being mauled by the big brownies.\"\n\n\u2014Russell Annabel, \"Plenty of Bear,\" Field & Stream, 1937, reprinted in The Field & Stream Reader, Doubleday, 1946\n\n86. The Curious Eating Habits\n\n\"Black bear generally feed on berries, nuts, insects, carrion, and the like; but at times they take to killing very large animals. In fact, they are curiously irregular in their food. They will kill deer if they can get at them; but generally the deer are too quick. Sheep and hogs are their favorite prey, especially the latter, for bears seem to have a special relish for pork. Twice I have known a black bear to kill cattle.\"\n\n\u2014Theodore Roosevelt, The Wilderness Hunter, 1893\n\n87. Tell Black Bear Tracks from Grizzly Tracks\n\nYou can't tell a black bear's tracks from a grizzly's based on size alone. Large black bears will have tracks as big as medium-size grizzlies, and variations in sex and age make this an even more unreliable indicator. And while grizzlies usually have longer claws than black bears (translating into claw marks further from the tips of the toe imprints), not all surfaces pick up claw marks. The best way to tell which animal left a track you've found is this: find the imprint of the bear's front foot and draw a straight line across the base of the toes so that it's just touching the top of the front pad. If it's a grizzly track, most of the toes will be above this line. If it's a black bear the inside toe will be mostly below this line.\n\n88. The Differences between Boars and Sows\n\nIt can be very difficult to determine the sex of a black bear in the field. Male black bears, called boars, are generally much larger than females (sows) and have larger heads and longer bodies. Female bears rarely reach 350 pounds; boars commonly grow to 500 pounds or more. However, the only sure way to tell a younger male from a female is to look for a penis. This is easy in the spring and summer months, but can be difficult in the fall, when a bear's belly hair will be quite long.\n\n89. Why Late Season Is a Great Season\n\nFall bear hunting generally gets better later in the season. One reason is that bears move more often in cooler weather. Another is that in states or provinces where baiting is legal, hunters will often stop maintaining their bait piles after they fill their tags. Animals that were feeding on such bait will actively search for new food sources, making your own pile that much more attractive. Last, if you kill a bear in the late season, when the air is usually cold, you'll have an easier time of getting your meat out of the woods before it sours.\n\n90. Carry Tracking Line to Mark a Blood Trail\n\nAccording to Richard P. Smith, author of The Book of the Black Bear, one of the best ways to keep track of a bear's blood trail is to carry a couple of spools of Game Tracker line. This line is more commonly used by bowhunters (it attaches to their arrows and spools out after they shoot) but is also very helpful for hunters carrying guns. If you're trailing a wounded bear, simply allow the tracking line to pay out behind you. You'll get an easy to follow, continuous record of the trail you're following, and you won't have to break your concentration in order to tie bits of surveyors tape to branches or mark the trail some other way.\n\n91. Size a Bear by Looking at Its Tracks\n\nYou can get a good idea of how large a bear is by looking at its tracks. Average-sized black bears (150 to 200 pounds, dressed) will leave front tracks that are 3\u00bd to 4 inches wide, and rear tracks that are from five to six inches long. The tracks left by a trophy-sized animal will be much larger, with front pads five to six inches wide, and rear pads eight inches or longer.\n\n92. Talk Loudly to Avoid Startling Bears\n\nAccording to Richard P. Smith, author of The Book of the Black Bear, a hunter should rarely sneak when hiking in to hunt a bait pile. If a bear is already feeding there, the sudden appearance of a human may startle the animal, which could cause it to avoid the bait in the future, or to feed on it only at night. Instead, the hunter should warn any bears in the area of his approach well in advance of arriving at the bait. Whistle and talk in a normal, calm voice on the way in; this will notify the bear that you're on your way before you're close enough to startle the animal. Bears know that bait is left by humans and while they will move away off to avoid being seen when they hear people approaching, they will not be spooked as long as they are not taken unawares, and should return once they think you are no longer in the area.\n\n93. Give a Bear Time to Die\n\nBe careful when trailing a bear you've shot if you're only hunting with a bow. Pay attention to where your arrow hits the animal, and delay tracking it until you're confident that the bear has had time to die. Wait at least a half an hour if you hit it in the lungs, an hour if you hit it in the liver, and at least four hours if you shoot it in the gut. If possible (and legal), bring along a friend with a gun.\n\n94. What a Bear Trail Looks Like\n\nBecause bears will generally step in the exact same places when taking familiar routes, well-used bear trails often look like old, deep footprints worn into the forest floor rather than the smooth, groove-like paths normally associated with game trails.\n\n95. Trail a Drive to Bag a Trophy\n\nOne of the best ways to bag a big bear when putting on a drive through thick cover is to post a couple of shooters behind the drivers. Older bruins do not startle easily and will avoid leaving their security cover if at all possible. Instead of running out ahead of the drivers as a younger bear might do, a big bruin will often simply circle around them. Hunters following the drive stand a good chance of seeing bears that behave this way.\n\n96. Bowhunting Black Bears\n\nTime was when only the top experts even thought about taking a bear with a bow. Not today. Many of the same bowhunters who bag whitetail bucks with their bows are on the hunt for black bears\u2014mostly over bait in Canada. Opportunities to bag a bear with a bow abound in Canada. When Googling for information, make sure you type in the province you're interested in, and, of course, look for the guides and outfitters who have solid records in bowhunting.\n\n97. How to Measure a Trophy Bear\n\n\"Boone & Crockett recognizes four species of bear in North America: the Alaska brown bear, the grizzly bear, the black bear, and the polar bear. All are scored the same way, by measuring a dry skull's greatest width and adding it to its greatest length. The minimum scores required to make the all-time B&C books are:\n\nAlaska brown bear\u201428 inches\n\nPolar bear\u201427 inches\n\nGrizzly bear\u201424 inches\n\nBlack bear\u201421 inches.\"\n\n\u2014Tom McIntyre, www.fieldandstream.com\n\n98. Where to Shoot a Bear with a Gun\n\nThe best place to shoot a black bear with a rifle, shotgun, or handgun when the animal is broadside to you is directly in the center of its shoulder. If you're using the right caliber rifle (.270 or higher) this shot should break both of the animal's shoulders and penetrate its lungs. If the bear is facing you the best place to shoot it will be directly in the center of the chest. If it's facing away from you, shoot it in the center of its back, directly between the shoulder blades.\n\n99. Use Multiple Knives When Trimming Bear Fat\n\nBears spend the summer and fall months building up a thick layer of fat in preparation for their winter dormancy. If you shoot one in the fall, you'll need to trim off this fat before storing the animal's meat. The meat will keep longer and take up less space in your freezer, but the process takes time. Save some by having a few spare knives and a sharpening tool handy.\n\n100. Don't Plan a Spring Hunt Too Early\n\nWatch the weather when planning a spring bear hunt. A warm spring will get bears moving earlier in the season, but an unseasonably cold one will discourage them from leaving their dens. If you're traveling out west or to Canada to hunt spring bears, it's a good idea to build a bit of cushion into your schedule in case winter lingers longer than normal.\nCHAPTER 5\n\nPig Hunting\n\n101. Distinguish Hog Tracks from Deer Tracks\n\nAlthough hog tracks and deer tracks can be the same size, it is not difficult to tell them apart once you know what to look for. Hog tracks are blockier than deer tracks and have rounded rather than pointed tips. Deer tracks are teardrop shaped; hog tracks are square in both front and back, and have a more uniform width.\n\n102. Hunt Small Herds to Find Unpressured Pigs\n\nIf you know there are pigs in the area you're hunting but find only minimal amounts of sign, do not get discouraged. Smaller herds of pigs can be more predictable (and thus easier to hunt) because they are generally less pressured than larger groups, whose obvious trails and numerous wallows attract many more hunters.\n\n103. Wild vs. Feral\n\nVery few of the hogs in North America are truly wild\u2014most are descended from domestic pigs, and should be referred to as feral. A true Russian wild boar has a much longer nose and legs than a hog descended from domestic stock, it will have a pronounced ridge of hair running down the center of its back, and its tail will be straight.\n\n104. Shoot to Kill Quickly When Hunting Hogs\n\nA hog's vital organs are located lower in its body cavity than are vital organs in the body cavities of ungulates. To ensure a killing shot, always aim directly behind the shoulder as well as slightly lower than you would aim on a white-tailed deer. Be very sure of your shot before pulling the trigger or releasing your arrow. You do not want to have to follow one far after hitting it; hogs have a thick layer of fat beneath their skin that can quickly plug a wound, making blood trailing difficult, especially if you shoot the animal in a wet, swampy environment.\n\n105. Spot-and-Stalk Hogs in Open Country\n\nIn fairly open country, spotting wild pigs from a distance and then stalking them can be an effective method. Start out by trying to situate yourself you where you have a commanding view and the wind is coming toward you. If pigs are seen at a distance, walk slowly and quietly toward them, keeping the wind at your face and using available cover. Since wild pigs have poor eyesight, you may be able to get fairly close without being detected.\n\n\u2014www.jesseshunting.com\n\n106. Look for Thickets to Find Bedded Pigs\n\nWherever you hunt pigs, you can be confident that they'll spend their days holed up in the thickest vegetation to be found. Look for palmetto thickets in swampy bottomland, laurel tangles in the mountains, and grown-over clear cuts in forested country that are near a good source of food, such as an old orchard or grove of acorn-producing oaks. Set up your stand on trails that lead from their bedding cover to where they eat and make sure you're sitting in it long enough for the scent you left on the way in to disperse by the time they head out to feed in the evening.\n\n107. Here He Comes!\n\n\"When a wild boar means mischief, he makes his run with his head down. It is by a sudden thrust upward of his tusks that he does his deadly work. When he charges with his head high, he probably means that he just wants gangway.\"\n\n\u2014Archibald Rutledge, An American Hunter, Lippincott, 1937\n\n108. Look for Wallows When Scouting for Hogs\n\nWallows are muddy or dusty patches of ground where pigs roll to cool themselves off, remove parasites attached to their skin, and cover themselves in dirt to keep off biting insects. These are great places to look for when scouting, because you can use them to identify the sizes and numbers of animals in a herd. Tracks are easy to find in such places, and you can get an accurate read on a hog's size by measuring the imprints left by its body in the mud.\n\n109. Wild Boars: What You're Hunting\n\nWild boars in America are a mixture of feral (born wild) pigs from domesticated stock running loose in the woods for decades, even centuries, and of original European wild boars brought into this country and planted at different locations. One of the main plantings was by a man named George Moore who in 1912 put fourteen European wild boars on his 1600 acres of timbered land surrounding Harper's Bald, a mountain peak in the Snowbird Mountain Range of North Carolina. Moore thought of his land as a preserve, but, of course, the hogs roamed into the countryside and have been there for decades, plus spreading elsewhere in the Great Smokies. The pure European wild boars have also been imported in places ranging from New Hampshire to California to Georgia.\n\n110. Hunt Hogs near Old Homesteads\n\nOne of the best places to look for wild hogs is around an abandoned homestead. Pigs like these sites because they often contain abandoned orchards, overgrown gardens with wild-growing vegetables, and are located close to open meadows or overgrown pasture that offer a range of other food sources.\nCHAPTER 6\n\nMoose Hunting\n\n111. Don't Glass from the Same Spot You Call\n\nIt's always a good idea to change your location after you've finished an extended calling sequence so that you are glassing the area from a spot upwind of where you were calling. If there's a bull in the area, you can be sure he will have heard you and will remember the exact spot your calling came from. When he eventually comes in to investigate it's likely he'll first circle downwind of where he heard your calls. Switching spots lets you stay undetected if this happens.\n\n112. Be Patient When Calling in Moose\n\nMoose are curious creatures, but they can take their time satisfying that curiosity. Even during the peak of the rut it can take days for a moose that's heard your calling to decide to investigate. Be patient. There will be rare occasions when a nearby bull that's crazed with lust comes crashing into your setup right away, but most calling won't pay off until many hours later.\n\n113. Walk like a Moose\n\nMoose have sensitive ears and a keen sense of smell. It is very unlikely you'll be able to approach one on foot without it hearing you, even if you're working into the wind. Fortunately, you do not have to be completely silent. Instead, try to sound like a moose. First, make sure you're wearing no clothing that makes unnatural rustling sounds when brushed against branches or grass. Second, make sure any metal items you're carrying in your pockets, on your gun sling, or clipped to your jacket or pants are tightly secured so that they don't clink or clank while you're walking. Last, do not try to sneak. Predators sneak, tensing up their bodies in order to perform deliberate movements designed to minimize motion and reduce the sounds of their steps. Moose know what sneaking sounds like, and most humans are not capable of sneak quietly enough to fool one. You'll have more luck if you step as quietly as possible while still maintaining a loose, natural stride. Any sounds you make will likely be mistaken for the sounds of another moose, elk, or deer moving at a relaxed pace through the brush.\n\n114. How to Recognize a Pissed-Off Moose\n\nWhen a moose is irritated by your presence, it will use its body language to warn you that it's upset, pulling its ears back and flaring the long hair along its neck and hump, much the way a dog will when looking for a fight. It may even growl at you and lick its lips. When you see this, back away quickly and try to get a large obstruction between you and the animal.\n\n115. Russell Annabel on Alaska Moose Hunting\n\n\"Sheep hunting is great sport, bear hunting is packed with adventure and thrills, and there is a definite kick in risking your neck climbing the windy crags of the goat country\u2014but for downright fun, I'll take a moose hunt any old time. Like grouse shooting, it's a sport that goes with bright leaves tingling down through the branches of old trees, with quiet noonday watches on sun-drenched hillsides, with cautious sallies through the shadowy green-gold enchantment of deep forest aisles, and with campward horseback rides in the purple, star-shot dusk of mountain evenings. It is a sport for the man who appreciates the wilderness at its best, who has an eye for color and beauty\u2014and yet it also has its taut, pulse-quickening moments.\"\n\n\u2014Russell Annabel, \"In the Moon of the Painted Leaves,\" Field & Stream, 1936, reprinted in The Field & Stream Reader, Doubleday, 1946\n\n116. When to (and When Not to) Use a Big Scope\n\nOversize, 50mm objective lenses will always collect more light than standard-size rifle scopes, giving you a distinct advantage in low-light conditions\u2014brighter, sharper images of the animals you're aiming at. This does not mean, however, that you should always carry such a scope on your rifle. Oversize lenses are great choices if you're hunting from a stand or spotting and stalking in country where you expect to take long shots at unsuspecting moose. But if you plan to do much still-hunting, they can be a liability. There are two reasons for this. The first is that oversize scopes require higher mounts than standard scopes, which means it's more difficult to acquire a proper sight picture when you need to make a quick shot. The second is that oversized scopes are heavy! You'll be much happier if you mount standard-sized optics on the gun you use for still-hunting.\n\n117. Moose Hunting in a Big Wind\n\nUpland bird hunters hate days of the howling winds. Duck hunters love them. Moose hunters should love them. Working your way into position for a shot at moose is much easier in a big wind, if you plan your hunt to approach from downwind. First, the moose isn't going to catch your scent. Secondly, they can't hear much with the wind howling.\n\n118. Moose by Canoe\n\nMoose love water, and so do many moose hunters. This is because there are few ways to access unpressured moose habitat more quietly and with less effort than by paddling into it. And there are few ways of packing out moose meat more efficiently than by carrying its quarters in a canoe. Scan banks and shorelines for moose standing hidden in the brush, and pay close attention when paddling up or floating down rivers that connect ponds and small lakes\u2014moose travel along these streams because they often flow through flat terrain that's easier for them to traverse.\n\n119. Call like a Cow Using Only Your Voice\n\nCow calls are high-pitched groans that can be best described as a high, moaning \"eerrrrrrrr\" sound. These calls can be relatively short in duration, or can last for up to two minutes. You can imitate the sound using your voice alone. To do so, pinch your nose (a nasal sound does a better job of imitating a cow), cup your hands over your mouth, and start your \"err\" sound at a lower pitch, gradually raising pitch in the middle of the call, holding the \"r,\" and wavering your tone a bit before lowering the pitch as you taper off into silence.\n\n120. Stop a Startled Bull with a Cow Call\n\nIf you spook a bull, try making a long, loud cow call as he runs away. There's a good chance he'll stop to figure out where the sound is coming from, giving you an opportunity to make a quick shot.\nCHAPTER 7\n\nCaribou Hunting\n\n121. Caribou Migrate the Furthest\n\nSome caribou migrate more than 3,000 miles each year\u2014farther than any other land animal. They travel in herds every fall and spring from their wintering to their calving grounds, and arrive just in time to think about heading back.\n\n122. Multi-Purpose Hooves\n\nA caribou's hooves are wide, concave, and act like snowshoes, distributing the animal's weight on snow, ice, and melted muskeg. These hooves also work like paddles when caribou need to swim across fast-flowing rivers, or even large lakes. But they don't slow the animals down. Caribou have been recorded running faster than 50 miles per hour.\n\n123. Caribou Never Stop Moving\n\nCaribou are not the wiliest game animals a man can hunt, but that doesn't make them easy prey. First you have to find them. Then you have to decide whether or not to wait to shoot a trophy. You can't pattern a caribou because it never stays in one place. The herd you're stalking today might be miles and miles away the next. If you see a bull you like, pull the trigger, because you never know what tomorrow will bring.\n\n124. Bring the Right Optics\n\nUnless you're a bush pilot, hardest part of hunting caribou will be finding the herd. Bring high-power binoculars (at least 10 \u00d7 42) and carry a spotting scope. Make sure to use top-quality glass or you'll lose your ability to hunt during the morning and evening hours.\n\n125. Don't Spook the Herd\n\n\"When you're sneaking up on a bull, keep track of other caribou. They seem to float in from nowhere just when you want to move. Though caribou won't jet away like a whitetail buck when you surprise them at a distance, they will jog off and take other caribou with them. Then you have two options: Stay put and hope they stop so that you can stalk them again, or run after them. In my experience, spooked caribou seldom give you an easy second hunt.\"\n\n\u2014Wayne van Zwoll, \"Caribou: Noble and Mobile,\" www.fieldandstream.com\n\n126. How to Field-Judge a Caribou's Antlers\n\nWhen trying to guess the length of a caribou's antlers, use the animal's shoulder as a measuring stick. Most shoulders will be between 48 and 54 inches high. Look for antlers with curved main beams, which will generally be both longer and wider than straight ones (though they may look shorter from the side). A trophy animal's shovels will be broad, have multiple points, and extend far out over the muzzle. Kicker points, the spikes that grow off the back of a caribou's antlers, will add to the score, as will palmation and extra points at the tops.\n\n127. How to Read a Caribou's Body Language\n\n\"When caribou are not alarmed, they walk quite slowly, extending the head forward and downward. When alarmed, caribou perform a special behavior to warn other caribou of danger. They'll do this if a predator gets too close, but isn't about to catch them (or after they figure out that you're a person sitting on a rock). An alarmed caribou will trot with the head held high and parallel to the ground, and the short, normally floppy tail held up in the air.\"\n\n\u2014Alaska Department of Fish and Game\n\n128. A Good Gun for Caribou\n\nWhile a good shot won't need more than a .270 to take down a thin-skinned animal like a caribou, the animals are much larger-bodied than most whitetail deer. It can help to shoot a bigger gun when you're reaching out to knock one down at the long ranges you'll often find when hunting in the tundra. One great caribou cartridge is the .338 Win Mag. Loaded with a 200-grain bullet, the cartridge will hit three inches high at 100 yards. Elmer Keith loved this chambering for both caribou and elk, and you will, too.\n\n129. Winterize Your Caribou Gun\n\nAlways make sure to keep your gun clean, moisture-free, and either grease-free or treated with synthetic lube designed to function in extreme freezing temperatures. The last thing you want when firing your rifle at a caribou after a long, freezing, late season stalk is for the hammer, firing pin, or trigger to malfunction because your gun's oil congealed in the cold.\n\n130. Don't Put Wet Bullets into a Freezing-Cold Rifle\n\nAlways carefully clean any cartridges you've dropped on the ground if you're hunting in the far north during the late season. They make pick up moisture that causes them to freeze to the inside your gun's chamber, reducing your expensive rifle to a single-shot firearm.\nCHAPTER 8\n\nPronghorn Antelope Hunting\n\n131. Vision and Speed: The Pronghorn's Defense\n\n\"His eye is larger than that of cow or horse, nearly as large as that of an elephant; they give him somewhat the appearance of a huge beetle. He can see half or three-quarters of a mile away, with a range of vision keener than that of an 8-power glass. . . . I've seen a herd fairly fly across the plains up to the foothills and trees, then scorn the cover they have reached and circle back and back again, as if playing a game of tag with your bullets. The pronghorn is a real sportsman. He runs, but he never hides.\"\n\n\u2014Major Robert E. Treman, \"Wyoming Antelope,\" Field & Stream, 1937, reprinted in The Field & Stream Reader, Doubleday, 1946\n\n132. The Pronghorn Challenge\n\n\"Antelope shooting is the kind in which a man most needs skill in the use of the rifle at long ranges; they are harder to get near than any other game\u2014partly from their wariness and still more from the nature of the ground they inhabit . . . Even good hunters reckon on using six or seven cartridges for every prong-horn they kill; for antelope are continually offering standing shots at very long distances, which, nevertheless, it is a great temptation to try, on the chance of luck favoring the marksman.\"\n\n\u2014Theodore Roosevelt, Ranch Life and the Hunting-Trail, The Century Co., 1888\n\n133. Set Your Decoys with Stealth\n\nWhen hunting pronghorns with a bow, a decoy can make the difference between a fruitless stalk and a successful hunt. The trick is to creep close enough to set one up, and then to set it up without being spotted. Wait until the buck you're hunting is busy chasing a doe, or obscured from view by a clump of sage or other brush. If he sees your decoy rise up out of the grass he may grow suspicious of the unnatural motion and fail to come closer to investigate.\n\n134. Sit over Water\n\nYou can avoid strenuous stalks during midday heat if you switch to hunting a water hole. Pronghorns are creatures of the dry, high plains, but they need to drink periodically, and will often show up during the hottest hours to slake their thirst. If you know which water sources they've been using you stand a good chance of ambushing one.\n\n135. Give Your Blind Time\n\nIf you plan to hunt from a blind overlooking a water source, make sure the blind has been in place for a few days before you plan to sit in it. Pronghorns will be wary of this new addition to the landscape after it first appears; you want to hunt from it after they grow comfortable enough with its presence to wander within bow range.\n\n136. You Don't Need Long Shots\n\n\"The key to getting up on [pronghorns] lies in the seemingly flat land they inhabit, which is actually broken, cut, and intersected by coulees, ravines, gullies, washes, draws, ridges, hills, and divides. A smart antelope hunter can take advantage of this tortured topography to get close\u2014almost always less than 200 yards, and very often less than 100.\"\n\n\u2014David E. Petzal, \"Choosing the Right Rifle for Pronghorn Antelope,\" www.fieldandstream.com\n\n137. Glass from Your Truck\n\nMost pronghorn antelope have yet to associate vehicles with the hunters who drive them. This makes your truck an idea platform from which to glass for a trophy. Once you've spotted a buck you want to stalk, glass out the route you plan to stalk, then drive your truck far enough away that the animal won't see you getting out.\n\n138. The Pronghorn Antelope's Range\n\n\"True Americans, pronghorn are found only on the plains and grasslands of North America. Like bison, seemingly endless numbers once covered the west, stretching from Saskatchewan to just north of Mexico City. And like bison, they nearly became extinct. Populations declined from an estimated 30\u201360 million in the early 1800s to less than 15,000 by 1915. A moratorium on hunting lasting until the 1940s and a federal tax on firearms and sporting goods funding conservation efforts are credited with stopping the decline. Today there are almost 1 million pronghorn. Five subspecies are recognized: American\/common (found in most of range, Canada, and northern Arizona); Mexican\/Chihuahuan (found in New Mexico, Texas, formerly southeastern Arizona); Oregon (found in southeastern Oregon); peninsular (100\u2013250 animals, found in Baja, Mexico); and Sonoran (endangered, 500 animals found at Cabeza Prieta National Wildlife Refuge and Sonora, Mexico).\"\n\n\u2014Facts About Pronghorns, U.S. Fish & Wildlife Service, www.fws.gov\n\n139. Some Facts of Pronghorn Biology\n\nA male pronghorn weighs, on average, about 120 pounds. Females are slightly smaller, averaging 105 pounds. The animals are not large, standing approximately 3 feet at the shoulder. Both males and females have horns, though the male's are significantly longer, averaging 13 to 15 inches compared to the female's 3- to 5-inch horns. Pronghorns can live up to nine years in the wild.\n\n140. How to Field-Judge a Pronghorn\n\nA trophy antelope's horns will be longer than thirteen inches, which is the distance from the base of an average pronghorn's ear to the tip of its nose. Horns that appear to be twice as long or longer than the animal's ears are likely to break the Boone & Crockett record books, especially if they are curved, crooked, and look wider at their bases than the width of the animal's eye. Look for horns that split into prongs above the tips of an pronghorn's ears. You want an animal whose front prong extends at least 4 inches forward from the main horn.\nCHAPTER 9\n\nWild Sheep and Mountain Goat Hunting\n\n141. North America's Native Wild Sheep\n\nThere are two species of wild native sheep in North America, the bighorn sheep and the Dall sheep. There are three subspecies of bighorn: the Rocky Mountain bighorn (Ovis canadensis canadensis), the Sierra Nevada bighorn (Ovis canadensis sierrae), and the desert bighorn (Ovis canadensis nelsoni). There are two subspecies of Dall sheep: the Dall sheep proper and the Stone sheep.\n\n142. Glass in the Morning\n\nAlthough sheep move most during the morning and evening, it's generally a bad idea trying to find the animals late in the day. Sheep live in high, rough country. Unless you're prepared to spend the night, you don't want to get caught on the side of the mountain in the dark.\n\n143. Watch for Their Rumps\n\n\"Bedded sheep will almost always get up and move around a little . . . between noon to around 1 PM. They may feed for a few minutes, or move from one group of beds to another nearby. Or they may only get up, stretch, turn around and lie back down in the same bed. If you are watching the right spot at the right time, you'll see their white rumps and know exactly where they are.\"\n\n\u2014Bob Hagel, The Expert's Book of Big Game Hunting in North America\n\n144. The Colors of the Mountain\n\nBighorn sheep come in a variety of colors, from light tan to dark brown to a deep blue-gray. These colors vary from region to region (and sometimes within a single region). Because the animals tend to bed in spots that match the colors of their coats, it's a good idea to have a sense of the common shades found in the area you plan to hunt. Look for ground that matches these colors, then look for sheep hidden there.\n\n145. How to Field-Judge a Mountain Goat\n\nIdentifying a trophy mountain goat is not easy. The differences between a good billy's and a record-book animal's horns will often be less than an inch. The first step to finding a record is to make sure the animal you've spotted is, in fact, a male. Billies have high, humped shoulders, and shaggier coats than nannies. Once you've found an old male goat, straighten out his horns in your minds eye and compare that length to the length of the animal's head. If the stretched horns reach from the animal's nose to the bottom of its eye, they are less than nine inches long. If they reach from the nose to the base of the ear, they are at least nine inches long and will qualify as a true trophy.\n\n146. Creep across Crests\n\nWhen stalking sheep and goats, be extremely careful to never silhouette yourself against the skyline. If you must cross the crest of a ridge or a saddle, do so on your hands, knees, and belly, and move as slowly as you can.\n\n147. How to Field-Judge a Trophy Sheep\n\nWhen glassing for a record-book sheep, always look for a full, curling horn that's bottom extends below the line of the lower jaw. You want heavy, thick horns with broomed tips, which will score higher than unbroomed horns of the same length.\n\n148. Scan for a Silhouette\n\nSheep easily spot a skylined hunter's silhouette, especially when the hunter is moving. But the reverse is also true. When glassing for sheep, always keep a close eye on the tops of ridges, cliff edges, and the skyline over a saddle. Scanning for silhouettes is the easiest way to spot these animals.\n\n149. Don't Educate the Herd\n\nIf you're hunting with friends or as part of a guided group and are lucky enough to kill a sheep, don't immediately rush in to claim your kill after the shot. Stay hidden, watch to see where the animal falls, and wait to retrieve it until the rest of the herd has left the area. Avoid startling them and other hunters in camp will have a much easier time of stalking sheep in the area.\n\n150. Account for the Hump\n\nDon't let an old billy goat's hump throw off your aim. This massive growth of fat and hair covers a ridge of finlike vertebral spines and gives the animal a unique profile when compared with other big game. When preparing to pull the trigger, don't put your crosshairs roughly halfway up a mountain goat's body the way you would on an elk or a deer; the animal's vitals will be located in the lowest third of its body. Hold at the top of that lowest third to ensure a killing shot.\nCHAPTER 10\n\nTurkey Hunting\n\n151. Learn to Shoot Turkeys from Both Shoulders\n\nOne of the most difficult situations in turkey hunting is having a bird sneak up behind you when you're sitting at the base of a tree. It can be extremely difficult to twist your body around far enough to make an accurate shot, and it's nearly impossible if the bird is behind your right shoulder if you're a right-handed shooter (and vice versa if you shoot with your left hand forward). It's a good idea to practice shooting your turkey gun from your opposite shoulder before the season starts. If you're comfortable taking shots this way your chances of getting a bead on a turkey without spooking it will improve dramatically.\n\n152. Control the Volume of Your Box Call\n\nIf you're working a gobbler with a box call and he hangs up in the distance, you may be calling too strongly. Box calls are notoriously loud; the tom may think the hen you're imitating is closer to him than you want, and will often stop and wait, thinking that she will come to him. One way to get him moving is to reduce the volume of your call. Hold the call upside down, with the handle on the bottom, and slide your thumb up the sides to increase pressure on the call and gradually dampen the vibration. The gobbler will think the hen is moving away from him and may give chase.\n\n153. Five More Reasons Gobblers Are Easy to Miss\n\nNeed more reasons to miss a gobbler within 30 yards? Try these: (1) The bird is moving, and you panic slightly, raising your head from the gunstock just a bit; (2) You gun is new, unfamiliar, or one you haven't shot in weeks or months; (3) You're wearing gloves, deadening your touch, and you pull the trigger like it's a rusty nail; (4) Your guide or companion is doing the calling, and he whispers the command \"Shoot!\" to you. You instantly obey, even though you're not ready; and (5) You try for a head shot. Any of these reasons is enough to make a grown man cry.\n\n154. Use Decoys Late in the Season\n\nThe best time to use turkey decoys is after most hens are already sitting on their nests. A decoy is much less effective early in the breeding season when most toms will already be attended by hens.\n\n155. The Best Place to Set Up on a Roosted Gobbler\n\nIf you've done your scouting homework, you'll often know where a gobbler has roosted for the night. If you've done your extra credit, you'll know where he goes after he flies down. The best place to set up to call him in the morning will be between these two places, about 100 to 200 yards away from his tree (distance depending on how well leafed out the trees are). Get there well before first light, and sneak in as quietly as you can. Roosted birds are alert to unusual sounds and can pick up movements even in very dark conditions.\n\n156. Don't Let a Hot Gobbler Get Too Close\n\nThe next time a gobbling tom comes trotting into your setup, don't wait too long before taking the shot. Most turkey load patterns open up at around 20 to 30 yards; this is the distance at which you have the best chance of putting a pellet into his brain or spine. If you let him get to close your pellets may be packed so tightly together that a slight miscalculation will cause all of them to miss.\n\n157. Locating Roosting Gobblers\n\nWhen your calling or scouting has located a roosting area (and you've been careful not to spook the birds!), you'll hear them fly up into the trees\u2014big wings flopping, a great deal of noise. Be aware, however, that they don't pick the limb they wish to roost on from the ground, then fly up to it. It's after they are in the trees that they move around to a favored spot to spend the night.\n\n158. When Gobblers Get Lonely\n\nMany turkey hunters miss out on bagging their bird by not being alert to a hunting opportunity that takes place in the middle of the day. Sometimes around eleven o'clock in the morning, hens have left the gobbler to go to their nests. That's when the toms get lonely\u2014and start to gobble, betraying their location. You can get into position, set up, and call in your bird.\n\n159. Rake Leaves to Call in Hung-up Toms\n\nThe next time a gobbler hangs up in the distance, responding to your calls but refusing to approach, stop calling and start imitating the sound of a feeding hen by raking a hand through the leaf litter at your feet. If all goes according to plan, the gobbler will grow frustrated, wondering why the hen he can hear scratching for food won't respond to his calls, and will often come closer to investigate.\n\n160. Fake a Flock of Fall Turkeys\n\nMost hunters use turkey decoys to stimulate a gobbler's mating or competitive instincts during the spring season, but decoys also work well for fall turkeys. The trick is to use lots of them to simulate a small flock. If you can figure out where the turkeys you're hunting roost, and where they feed, set up your fake flock between them and use a couple of different calls to imitate the sound of a few feeding hens.\n\n161. Circle Gobbling Birds Hung up behind Obstacles\n\nGobbling turkeys hang up for lots of reasons, but one of the most common is that there's an obstacle between him and you. Streams, fences, and ravines will often keep a turkey from following up on the promise of a ready hen. In many cases you'll have the best luck killing your bird by crossing these barriers yourself. Using a crow call to keep him gobbling, circle around him until you're 180-degrees away from where you were set up before. He'll be more likely to return along a path he's already used than he will to work through less familiar territory, and you'll know there won't be any other obstacles on this trail that might obstruct his progress.\n\n162. Faking Out a Gobbler: A Desperation Tactic\n\nWhen a gobbler plays hard to get, and nothing else has worked try walking straight away from him, calling occasionally as you go. If he thinks his potential paramour is leaving him, he just might come running.\n\n163. Cover Ground to Find Mid-Day Gobblers\n\nTurkeys gobble more in the early morning than they do during the middle of the day. This makes them easier to find, but it does not mean they are easier to hunt. Most toms will gobble in the morning even if they're with hens, which means you stand a good chance of spending all morning talking with a bird that has no reason to come to your calls. If you find yourself working a bird that refuses to come to you, don't give up hope. Instead, go looking for a more accommodating tom. It is true that turkeys gobble less frequently when the sun is high, but the flip side of this behavior is that if you find one that does gobble, he is much less likely to be with a hen and will be far more willing to come in to your calls. Hike through your property and call every 100 yards or so until you get a response.\n\n164. Don't Get Mistaken for a Turkey\n\nNever wear any clothing or carry any accessories that contain the colors red, white, or blue. You should also keep your hands and head camouflaged when calling, and wear dark-colored socks and pants long enough to keep bare skin fully covered. These colors are found on the heads of wild turkeys, and you do not want to be mistaken for a gobbler by another hunter.\n\n165. Make a Gobbler Jealous\n\nYou can use a decoy to simulate a breeding hen by pushing a hen decoy's stake deeply enough into the soil so that the decoy's belly touches the ground. Hens take this position when they're ready to mate. Put a jake decoy behind her (a jake is an immature male turkey), as if he's about to breed her, and the tom you're hunting may become so upset that he approaches your setup with much less caution.\n\n166. Bust a Roosted Flock in the Fall\n\nThe most common tactic used by fall turkey hunters is to find and then scatter a flock of the birds and then sit down to call them back in. Turkeys will naturally want to regroup, and if you call well enough to imitate a lost bird, they will use you as a homing beacon. One good way to find a flock to bust is to identify where the birds roost. Scout the woods for large hardwood trees with lots of fresh droppings at their bases, and head out the evening before you plan to hunt to listen for the sounds the birds make as they fly up for the night. Creep into the woods before sunrise the next day, and then rush the flock as soon as it flies down.\n\n167. Coping with \"Shut-Mouth\" Gobblers\n\nIf pressure has forced spring gobblers into silence, try patterning a long beard like you would a deer. He'll have favorites route he takes to favored strutting areas and feeding spots. So glass open areas until you find where the birds are using, then set up an ambush.\n\n168. Don't Waste Time on Henned-Up Birds When You Can Hunt Somewhere Else\n\nIf you've got lots of land to hunt, don't waste time trying to bring in turkeys that aren't that interested in your calling. When a bird gobbles once in response to your calls but won't move any closer after 15 to 20 minutes, it's likely he's still with hens. Make a mental note of your location, then move on to search for another, lonelier bird who will respond with more enthusiasm. Later, however, if you still haven't filled your tag, return to the spot you were calling in when you first heard him gobble and try calling again. His hens may now be on their nests, and he'll be wondering what happened to the one that wouldn't come see him earlier in the morning.\n\n169. Why Gobblers Are Easy to Miss\n\nHow do hunters miss a big target like a wild turkey standing within 30 yards? My personal pet theory (and I've done it myself!) is that the shooter is so enthralled by the scene before him that he raises his head from the gunstock just slightly. Do that, and you'll miss every time.\n\n170. When Roosting Gobblers Fly Down\n\nWhen you hear hens fly down from the roost, while a gobbler lingers on his limb, still calling occasionally, your nerves will be as tight as they can get. But don't start thinking your bird is as good as in the oven. Next, a scenario can take place that virtually dooms your hunt. The hens may start walking away in a direction away from your setup. The gobbler flies down and joins them, oblivious to your calls.\nCHAPTER 11\n\nDuck Hunting\n\n171. Wind and Your Decoy Setups\n\nThe truth is that you can spread your duck decoys just about any way you wish, as long as you leave an open area for the birds to land into the wind. No matter which way they come from, or how much they circle, their final move down will be into the wind. No wind at all? It becomes a guessing game.\n\n172. Guide's Advice I Don't Want to Hear\n\nIn the duck blind, you'll often hear your guide urge you to, \"Stay down. Keep your head down. Don't watch the birds! I'll do the watching.\" Well, if you're not watching the birds, you're losing part of the joys of the hunt. Your blind should be good enough for you to peer through the stalks or brush just as the guide is doing. When the ducks are passing right overhead, neither one of you should be looking skyward. You'll spook the birds for sure.\n\n173. Pothole Sneak Attack\n\nIf you've scouted out a promising pothole or small pond and you're planning to jump-shoot the ducks that are resting there, try to sneak up on them with the wind at your back. When the ducks jump into the wind (which they most certainly will do), you might get a shot before they re-orient themselves and fly the other way.\n\n174. Local Birds: Use Small Decoy Spreads for Small Bunches\n\nMake a distinction between the resident ducks you hunt in early season and the large flocks that migrate in later on. You'll spot resident birds in pairs and small flocks, so decoy them accordingly and don't burn out any one place by hunting it too often. Save the big spreads for when the birds from up north show up.\n\n175. Mix 'Em up If You Want To\n\nSo you're thinking about adding some bluebills or canvasbacks (diving ducks) to your decoy setup of mallards, pintails, and gadwalls (puddle ducks) to give your spread more visibility. Go right ahead. It won't hurt your chances a bit.\n\n176. Jump-Shooting Joys\n\nJump-shooting ducks from a canoe or john-boat is a great way to hunt some creeks and small rivers. The best way is with a partner, one hunter with the gun at the ready, the other on the paddling. Stay quiet, anticipate the sharp bends where you may surprise a few mallards, blacks, or other puddle ducks. Listen carefully as you go. You just might hear the birds before you get to them.\n\n177. Too Hidden for a Good Shot\n\nWhen you're hunkered down in a blind so that you can't see the ducks you're working, when it comes time for someone to exclaim, \"Take 'em!\" you come up with your gun and have to find the birds before you get down to pointing and swinging the barrel. It won't be an easy shot.\n\n178. Gloves for Setting out Decoys\n\nGloves that stretch almost to your elbows and keep your hands dry are a must for setting out decoys. Shuck 'em off and wear your regular gloves when you get into the blind. See the \"Midwest PVC Decoy Glove\" at Mack's Prairie Wings, www.mackspw.com. Check other favorite waterfowl gear vendors for other options.\n\n179. Pond Shooting at Sunset: The Way It Used to Be\n\nWaiting for ducks at sunset beside ponds where the ducks would be coming to roost was once a mainstay of hunting tactics. Local wood ducks, mallards, and black ducks, puddle ducks of all sorts that had migrated into a particular area\u2014they all come hurtling into the ponds after sunset. Sometimes the shooting was so late, the birds had to be outlined against the western sky. Today, shooters who try this are easy marks for wardens waiting nearby to hear the sounds of gunshots after legal shooting hours. If you want to just watch the show (and you should!) leave your guns in the truck.\n\n180. It's All about Visibility, Visibility, Visibility\n\nUnless you're gunning a tiny creek-bottom or river location, surrounded by high trees, most of your duck-hunting locations will be in open areas where you hope passing birds can see your decoys and come on in. Anything you can do to increase the visibility of your spread will make a difference. Black decoys show up better from a distance. Magnum-size adds visibility. Canada geese decoys add visibility, whether you're hunting geese or not. Movement devices (the ones that are legal where you hunt) are critical if there's no wind blowing: spinners, battery-driven shakers, pull-cord movers\u2014whatever you've got.\n\n181. The \"Hole\" Is the Thing\n\nNo matter what shape of decoy spread you decide is right for your hunting location and conditions, it must contain a hole or two for the birds to land. If the water in front of the blind is solid with decoys, the birds will land on the outside of the spread, at long range or even out of range.\n\n182. The Outer Gun: The Key Position\n\nThe Outside shooter on the upwind side of permanent duck blinds or lay-out blind setups is in the key position and can absolutely ruin the shooting for everybody with him. It's happened to me more times than I can remember. The ducks, or geese, are coming into the spread against the wind, from his side. If he starts shooting too early, around the corner, the guns in the center and other side will get no shots, or shots at widely flaring birds only. Sometimes, to top off this little drama, the outside offender will turn to the other guys and say, \"Why didn't you guys shoot?\" Advice: Put an experienced shooter in that outside position, a shooter with the judgment and nerve to wait until the birds are into the spread enough so everybody can shoot.\n\n183. Where'd the Mallards Go?\n\nWhen you're on a marsh in the early morning where you reasonably expect a flight of mallards, don't be surprised if they don't show up until later in the morning. Your local birds, or even visitors from the north, may be feeding in the fields.\n\n184. Black Ducks\u2014Red Letter Day\n\nMy calling aspirations reached a sort of pinnacle years later. I was hunkered on an icy creek on the marshes of the Chesapeake Bay, near the famous Susquehanna Flats. A pair of black ducks flew down the creek, very high and in a big hurry, headed somewhere with express tickets. They clearly were not interested in my modest decoy spread, but when I hit them with my old Herter's call and the Highball, they turned like I had 'em wired. Interested then, they circled warily while I scrunched down. Now I started rattling off my Feeding Chuckle, and a few moments later they were cupped and committed. I could finally say that I knew how to call ducks.\n\n185. Where the Birds Want to Be\n\nPushing into a cove in the marsh or along a big river or lake, in the first pre-dawn light, you flush a big bunch of ducks or geese. Away they go, gabbling and honking. Never mind trying to follow them or heading for another spot. Set up right there. It's the place the birds want to be.\n\n186. \"Take 'Em!\"\n\nFew moments afield are as thrilling as those when a big flock of ducks sweeps into your decoys. You'll shoot a lot better when you are aware whether your birds are diving ducks\u2014like bluebills and canvasbacks\u2014or puddle ducks\u2014like mallards and pintails. Diving ducks will bore straight past when the shooting starts, while puddle ducks will bounce skyward as though launched from a trampoline.\n\n187. Tall-Timber Trick\n\nWhen gunning the hole in the tall timber with a few decoys out, give the water around your tree a good kick when birds are passing or circling to imitate splashing and feeding activity.\n\n188. Using the Wind with Your Decoy Spread\n\nDucks often want to land outside a spread of decoys\u2014even when the setup has left an inviting hole. That's why you want to set your decoys upwind\u2014not directly in front of the blind\u2014so that you'll still have a good shot at the birds coming in against the wind and trying to land on the outside of the decoy spread.\n\n189. Don't Be a \"Skybuster\"\n\nA \"skybuster\" is the most hated person on any marsh or field where there's duck or goose hunting. The Skybuster blazes away at birds that are clearly out of range, thereby frightening the birds away from the area and ruining chances others might have had on the incoming birds.\n\n190. Beating the Crowds in Public Hunting\n\nDucks quickly wise up to blinds on public hunting areas. You score more ducks if you seek out remote corners that see much less pressure. Use just a half dozen or so decoys and call only enough to get passing birds' interest.\nCHAPTER 12\n\nGoose Hunting\n\n191. The Most Effective Way to Set Out Goose Decoys\n\nVeteran Maryland call-maker Sean Mann guides early season duck and goose hunting in Alberta and is one of the most successful and experienced in the business. He told DU's Wade Bourne, in a tip for the DU Web site: \"To finish more geese when hunting over a field spread, set decoys 10 feet apart (three long steps), and face them in random directions. This set provides a natural, relaxed look, and it also offers incoming birds plenty of landing room inside the spread. By setting my decoys so far apart, I use half the number I used to. I can set up and tear down faster, and most of all, the geese work better. Our hunts are much more productive than when I set decoys closer together. Less really can be more.\"\n\n192. How to Change Your Luck with Snow Geese\n\nIn the October '08 Field & Stream, author Dave Hurteau, in an interview with veteran guide Tracy Northup, Up North Outdoors, www.huntupnorth.com, presents a deadly method for changing your luck with those tough, high-flying flocks of snow geese. In a tip called, \"Play the Wind,\" Northup says. \"Snow geese typically fly high and circle straight down, making it difficult to shoot them anywhere but right over a good spread. But a 30\u201340-mph wind keeps them flying nice and low.\" Northup recommends scouting out a location of snows where there are ditches or hedgerows a hundred yards or so from the fields where you can sneak into position to pick off the low-flying snows as they pass\u2014without spooking the main flock.\n\n193. Birds in Flight: Looks Are Deceiving\n\nBecause they are big, Canada Geese appear to be slow in flight, compared to ducks. And because of their long tails, pheasants appear to be slower than they really are. Swing your gun properly, lead the bird, and keep swinging as you pull the trigger. Or you'll be shaking your head, wondering how you missed.\n\n194. Snow Geese: Playing the Numbers Game\n\nThose large flocks of snow geese weaving across the horizon, clamoring constantly, are hard to pull into normal decoy spreads of just two- or three-dozen birds. The flying geese can see great distances, and they are looking for big groups of feeding birds. Savvy hunters have learned to cope with this by putting out decoys by the hundreds, if necessary, and to do this they'll use all the silhouettes they can haul to the site, plus whatever \"rag-type\" decoys they can fashion themselves from things like baby diapers and white garbage bags attached to a stake.\n\n195. Layout Blinds Take Getting Used To\n\nWhen using a layout blind, before the birds start flying take some time to try practicing the move it takes to rise into a shooting position. It takes some getting used to. If you don't practice it, you may not be in a good position with your face well down on the gun during the first critical seconds when it's time to, take 'em!\n\n196. When the Canadas Sleep Late\n\nIn below-zero weather, sleep in an extra hour or two. When it's that cold Canadas will stay roosted and fly out to feed only after the sun has come up and warmed things up a bit. It might be 10 AM before they leave the roost. The only thing you'll get by showing up at dawn is cold.\n\n197. Keep Those Silhouettes Visible\n\nWhen using silhouette decoys for geese, take care to position them so many of them appear broadside at every angle. When edge-on to the viewpoint of the flying birds, they become invisible.\n\n198. Layout Blinds: You're Part of the Action\n\nYou're lying in a field, totally hidden right among the decoys. No brushy blind, no boat, no pit blind, no elaborate box blind, no blind on stilts. Instead, you're tucked comfortably into a well-camouflaged layout blind, made further invisible by attaching brush to the blind's convenient straps and holders. You're wearing camo yourself, including a hat and mask. Even your gun is camouflaged. Unlike hunting from a brush blind where you have to keep your face down\u2014and thereby miss part of the spectacle of flying birds on the way in\u2014you're seeing the whole show, from the time birds appear in the distance, until they coming right into your face. There's nothing like it!\n\n199. Hiding Your Boat in Plain Sight\n\nThe john-boat or canoe you can put into the water and go wherever the ducks and geese are flying has gotten a lot easier to hide with the introduction of today's synthetic camo material. The material, imitating different shades and textures of marsh grass, comes in manageable mats you can attach to your boat, then roll up and put away after your hunt. Cabela's, www.cabelas.com, has a bunch of different patterns, including the excellent Avery, and there's a popular one called Fast-Grass that's available at the Knutson's waterfowling store and site, www.knutsondecoys.com.\n\n200. Don't Let Those Incoming Geese Fool You\n\n\"The approach of wild geese to a blind is one of the neatest optical illusions in nature. The geese just keep on coming. You think they are one hundred yards away, and they are two hundred. You think they are fifty yards away, and they are one hundred.\"\n\n\u2014Gordon MacQuarrie, \"Geese! Get Down!,\" Field & Stream, 1941, reprinted in The Field & Stream Reader, Doubleday, 1946\nCHAPTER 13\n\nGrouse and Woodcock Hunting\n\n201. Good Hearing Can Pay Off Big\n\nWhen the leaves in the woods are dry and crinkly, say on a perfect Indian Summer day, you can actually hear the few steps ruffed grouse take to launch into flight. The sound is a sort of dry, \"tick, tick.\" Once you've heard it a couple of times, followed by a flushing bird, you'll know what to listen for.\n\n202. Grouse Hunting Teamwork\n\nIt's fun to hunt grouse with a buddy, but you must know each other's location at all times, and even then you may not be able to take a shot. (That's the very reason most grouse hunters shoot better when they're hunting alone.) In keeping track of one another, use a simple call-out, like, \"Ho!\" or \"Over Here!\" instead of constantly shouting sentences like, \"I'm over here, Bob, on your right.\" The more grouse hear of such talk, the more likely they are to flush wild.\n\n203. Second Shots on Early Season Grouse Coveys\n\nWhen you flush a couple of early season grouse, and fire only one shot, don't break your gun to reload right away. You may be into an entire group of birds hatched that year, and one of the birds that's been sitting tight will jump late\u2014just when you break open your gun. On the other hand, if you've fired both shells, try to reload as quickly as possible.\n\n204. Keep Track of Where You Shot From\n\nWoodcocks are small birds and their feathers make for excellent camouflage on the forest floor. This can make finding one you've shot hard to retrieve, especially if you're hunting without a dog. After you knock one down, hang your hat on a branch or drop a spent shell on the ground where you were standing when you pulled the trigger. If you get confused about where you thought the bird landed you'll be able to return to the exact place you shot from to restart your search.\n\n205. Cock Bird or a Hen? How to Tell\n\nThe black band on the tail of all ruffed grouse tells you whether you've bagged a male or female. The cock bird always has a continuous band, while the hen's is broken. As in all things in nature, there are exceptions sometimes, mostly among young birds.\n\n206. Noise Flushes More Grouse\n\nYes, grouse can be a tight-holding bird, but when you're approaching their location with a lot of chatter and constant commands to your dog, you're almost guaranteeing you'll get a wild flush, out ahead of the point.\n\n207. Flushing Dogs as Grouse Dogs\n\nIt makes a lot of sense to use flushing\/retrieving dogs like Labs, Springers, and Goldens as grouse and woodcock dogs. (Pheasants too, by the way.) In addition to flushing the birds, they retrieve and make great family dogs. When trained properly to hunt close to the gun, these dogs can do a good job for you in grouse and woodcock covers. When not properly trained, running wide distances and out of control, they are worse than useless. You'd be better off walking up your birds alone.\n\n208. The Perfect Grouse and Woodcock Gun\n\nWhen it comes to grouse guns, arguments may rage over the bore\u201412 or 20 gauge\u2014but you'll find general agreement over these details: lightweight, short barrel, fast swinging, and with a stock that fits so perfectly that it instantly becomes part of you when your face touches the stock.\n\n209. Hitting More Grouse: The Big Secret\n\nHere it comes, the grouse-hunting technique that will put more birds in your coat than any other: When you hear the flush, don't stand there looking for the bird, then raise your gun. Your gun should be coming to your shoulder as you look toward the direction of the flush. At the first glimpse of the bird, the barrel should be coming onto what you're seeing, and you fire instantly. There's no tracking, no aiming. It's a \"throw\" shot, as I prefer to call it, instead of the oft-heard \"snap\" shot. Of course, this method is assuming a hunting buddy is behind you, out of harm's way.\n\n210. The Dead \"Giveaway\" on Woodcock\n\n\"Going into strange woodcock terrain 'cold' can be disappointing. Two coverts may look alike, yet only one many attract 'cock. Whitewash is the best clue, next to seeing actual birds. The white splashing disintegrate rapidly and when you see them you can almost count on woodcock being nearby.\"\n\n\u2014George Bird Evans, The Upland Shooting Life, Knopf, 1971\n\nCHAPTER 14\n\nPheasant Hunting\n\n211. When Ringnecks Sit Tight\n\nDespite their reputation for being track stars, running ahead of the dogs and hunters, pheasants are capable of making themselves invisible and sitting tight when they feel pressured enough. They can hide in the smallest clump of grass, letting you walk right past them.\n\n212. Don't Let That Tail Fool You\n\nCompared to gamebirds like quail and ruffed grouse, the takeoff of a pheasant, while exciting, is rather slow. However, in its initial, vaulting leap, the rooster pheasant's long tail and gaudy colors make the bird seem even larger than it really is, and the shooter fails to take a lead, but merely pokes the barrel at the body of the bird.\n\n213. How \"Cackles\" Betray Cockbirds\n\nWhen a pheasant \"cackles\" as it flushes, it's a cockbird. Every time. Hens do not cackle. This doesn't mean that cockbirds cackle every time they flush. They don't. Sometimes they fly away in silence. But when you hear a cackling bird, even if it's in the sun and you can't see its colors, you know it's a cockbird.\n\n214. Go Late for Western Ringnecks\n\nWhile the typical western ringneck hunt involves following short tails though long, golden grass in shirt-sleeve weather, some of the best pheasant hunting on prime habitats in the Dakotas, Nebraska, and Montana occurs after Thanksgiving. There is less pressure then, and the winter weather tends to push birds into flocks. Gaining access to great hunting spots is often easier then, with big game seasons ended. So consider a late season pheasant hunt in the West.\n\n215. The Key Maneuver\n\nWhen you work pheasant cover, always work toward a distinct end point, be it an irrigation ditch, road, creek, or open field. The birds will eventually figure they can't outrun you. As you and your dog approach that end point, the birds will flush.\n\n216. You're Walking Past the Birds\n\nPheasants tend to sit tighter in wet weather, so work cover more thoroughly than you would on a bluebird day.\n\n217. Coming up Empty!\n\nAlways reload quickly after shooting a flushing rooster; he may have compatriots with him. While you're patting yourself on the back for a great shot, other birds may flush as you stand there with an empty shotgun.\n\n218. They Need to Take a Drink\n\nLike four-legged critters, pheasants need a water source to thrive. In dry months in the fall, work cover near watering holes late in the afternoon to find birds.\n\n219. Pheasants in the Tracking Snow\n\nGot snow? Then go track up a pheasant. You don't need a dog, and you'll quickly learn the birds' favorite hiding spots and get a good feel of how many birds are in the area.\n\n220. After the Season Opens . . .\n\nHunting pheasants on opening day and then a week later will seem like the difference between night and day. The pheasant's \"disappearing act\" after opening day is one of the most remarkable in all upland bird hunting.\nCHAPTER 15\n\nQuail Hunting\n\n221. Shooting the Covey Rise\n\nA good covey rise\u2014say twelve to fifteen birds\u2014is one of the most exciting events in all wing-shooting. Alas, it's also the time when many shooters miss on their first shot, then hastily throw their second shot into thin air. From Day One, quail hunters are urged, \"Pick out one bird and shoot it.\" But they have a hard time doing it. The sight of all those birds, particularly wild birds, hurtling toward the trees\u2014or even through the trees\u2014keeps their face from getting down on the stock, which will result in a miss every time. Some hunters do well on coveys by telling themselves that they're going to shoot the first bird that flies\u2014just as though they were shooting singles. In my case, my scores on covey rises improved when I started really hunkering down on the gun, swinging toward one bird, and telling myself, \"I'm going to kill that bird.\" That's the kind of focus shooting covey rises requires, at least in my view.\"\n\n222. Leave That Safety on until the Shot!\n\nIn my formative gun-handling years, I learned to leave the safety on until the gun is moving toward my shoulder to make a shot. Many quail hunters take their safeties off when walking in to a point to flush the birds. The practice is dangerous. The birds may have moved, the dog will have to relocate, and you might have a lot more walking before the birds take flight (if indeed they ever do take flight). Walking around through briars and tangles with a loaded gun with the safety off is a prescription for disaster. Train yourself to leave the safety on until a bird is in the air and the gun is moving toward your shoulder.\n\n223. Marking down the Singles\n\nAfter a covey rise, many hunters make the mistake of diverting their attention to downed birds too quickly, instead of carefully watching the escape routes of the covey's survivors. Even after these escaping birds are seen to cup their wings and sail in a certain direction, they bear careful watching, for they can sail a long way and change direction quickly.\n\n224. Cold Front Moving in\u2014Great Hunting!\n\nThere's nothing quite like being in the field in an afternoon when low clouds are scudding about, it's starting to spit just a bit of snow or icy rain, and the temperature has been dropping sharply. Quail will be feeding like there's no tomorrow, leaving strong trails of scent your dogs can easily find. You can bag your limit on a day like this.\n\n225. Make Mine a Side-by-Side\n\nAll right, call me \"old-fashioned\" if you wish. But to me, a side-by-side 20-gauge double is the gun of choice for bobwhite quail. Barrels 26 inches, bored modified and improved cylinder. You can tramp a long time with a light double, enjoying its sweet feel of balance and sleekness, and when the gun comes to your shoulder, the broad sighting plane seems to flow onto the target. I like double triggers, and a straight stock, but again, I'm old-fashioned. For many hunters today, the over-under seems to be the favorite, especially when it's the same gun used for sporting clays. Makes all the sense in the world. But it's not for me in the quail woods.\n\n226. Leave Some for \"Seed\"\n\nShooting a covey of wild bobwhites down to two or three birds doesn't make any sense. From a covey of say twelve birds, set your personal take as five or six. No more. Now leave that covey alone for the rest of the season. There's always next year.\n\n227. Keep Your Head down on the Stock\n\nHunters sometimes wonder why they missed a seemingly easy shot\u2014a covey of quail bursting into flight, a flock of mallards right over the decoys, even a wild turkey strutting into plain view. Often the reason is simply because you were so excited and enthralled by what you are seeing, that you lift your head slightly from the gunstock. When you do, it's all over! You're going to miss the shot.\n\n228. Take It Easy, Get More Shots\n\nWith a good bird dog willing to \"hunt close\" under today's tough conditions, quail hunting is not the place to be in a hurry. Instead, just mosey along and take your time, working every nook and cranny along the edges of the fields thoroughly. You'll find lots more coveys than the hunter in a hurry.\n\n229. When Birds Are Running, Keep up with Your Dog\n\nWhen your dog is pointing for a few seconds, then moving ahead, then moving again and relocating as you come up, you've obviously got some running birds ahead. Try to keep up with the dog as he moves along. Chances are high that this covey is going to flush wild, well ahead.\n\n230. They're Closer Than You Think\n\n\"Most quail are killed within sixty feet of the gun. Before you say I am wrong, measure the next ten you kill. The bobwhite fades away so fast on the flush that many men won't shoot at a bird thirty to thirty-five yards away, believing that he is beyond good killing range.\"\n\n\u2014Ray P. Holland, Scattergunning, Knopf, 1951\nCHAPTER 16\n\nSquirrel Hunting\n\n231. Staying Put on Your Stand\n\nWhen you've selected a good spot to sit and wait for squirrels to show themselves, don't be in a hurry to walk over and pick up the first two or three you down\u2014with shotgun or rifle. Mark them carefully and keep sitting tight and watch for another target to show.\n\n232. The \"Trunk-Hugger\" Squirrel\n\nWhen a squirrel hugs the trunk, high in the tree and not moving, it usually is facing up the tree. By hugging the trunk yourself, you can outlast the squirrel into thinking the coast is clear. It will make a move, giving you a shot.\n\n233. A Squirrel Hunt Can Make Your Day Great\n\nMany hunters get so caught up in the pursuit of deer and \"glamour\" upland birds like grouse, quail, and pheasant that they forget the simple pleasures of a great day out squirrel hunting. Take a golden autumn day, a small pack with sandwiches and a thermos, a scope-sighted .22 rifle, and local knowledge of an area and you can walk for miles\u2014that is, walk when you wish to. A lot of your day will be spent sitting quietly at the basses of trees, watching the canopy overhead. One caveat: You can't do this hunt when and where firearm deer hunting is in progress.\n\n234. Playing \"Hide-and-Seek\" with Squirrels\n\nWhen a squirrel is on the opposite side of a tree, and keeps going around and around as you circle, trying to get a shot, try throwing something noisy over to the squirrel's side. A heavy fallen stick or something. You can often move him to your side this way.\n\n235. Those Wonderful Squirrel Dogs\n\nThey'll never have the glamour and appeal of labs and pointers and setters, but good squirrel dogs are worth their weight in gold. What kind are they? All kinds! Feists, curs, whatever. A good nose and desire to hunt are the credentials, and the best way to take advantage of them is to have your squirrel dog puppy hunt with an accomplished squirrel dog. The really good squirrel dogs hunt close to the gun and use their nose, eyes, and ears to find squirrels. Easing slowly through the squirrel woods with one of these dogs is a wonderful way to go hunting. In many areas, you'll have a bonus: You'll flush coveys of quail, and send rabbits bouncing away.\n\n236. Cutting-Edge Squirrel Loads\n\nIn a comprehensive article called \"Cutting-Edge Squirrel Loads\" on the Game & Fish magazine Web site, www.gameandfishmag.com, writer Mike Bleech gives today's squirrel hunters the latest details on shotgun and rifle loads that do the best job in bringing home a limit of bushytails. Bleech examines the important differences in magnum versus standard shot loads, with emphasis on the all-important velocity considerations. He brings the .22 hunter right up to date with test-firing comparing the venerable .22 Long Rifle against the scorching hot newcomer the .17 Hornady Magnum Rimfire and the newer, but slower, Hornady .17M2. The .17M2 gets Bleech's nod as the best way to go because, as he says, \"The light crack of the .17M2 is barely noticed by the squirrels.\"\n\n237. Mast Crop Low, yet Hunting Great\n\nWhen the crop of acorns on the white and red oaks is low, look for squirrels to be concentrated in areas where some trees have bucked the trend. Whatever good spots for acorns are available, the squirrels will find them\u2014particularly the white oak acorns. White-tailed deer do the same.\n\n238. The Pecan Tree Bonanza\n\nThe shady, fruit-bearing groves of pecan trees planted throughout the southeast and on into Texas are squirrel magnets. Forested edges of the groves will hold good populations of squirrels. With the landowners' permissions, you'll be set for good hunting.\n\n239. Midwinter Fox Squirrels\n\nWhen there's a crust of snow on the ground and the temperatures have dipped into the 20s, don't expect fox squirrels to be on the prowl in early morning. You'll find the best hunting doesn't get started until around ten o'clock. Although like gray squirrels, fox squirrels like acorns and other nuts, in midwinter they will always head for corn if it's nearby. Fox squirrels prefer belts of trees near croplands instead of dense forests, more so than grays.\n\n240. Try More Aggressive Squirrel Tactics\n\nSuccessful squirrel hunters today have come as many calls and calling techniques as duck hunters. Consider these two examples: On the Hunter Specialties Web site, www.hunterspec.com, pro Alex Rutledge shows how to use the H.S. Squirrel Call to do the \"Barking,\" \"Chattering,\" and the \"Young Squirrel Distress Call.\" All are effective, but \"Barking\" is one known to set off a chorus of squirrel answering calls and tip off their locations in woods you're hunting for the first time. Outdoor writer John E. Phillips, in his \"John's Journal,\" on his Night Hawk Publications site, www.nighthawkpublications.com, also likes \"Barking,\" along with some other calls he describes in his article, \"How to Hunt Squirrels Aggressively.\"\nCHAPTER 17\n\nRabbit Hunting\n\n241. The Hunter's \"Rabbit's Foot\" Luck\n\nRabbits are the Number One game for hunters everywhere\u2014and with good reason. They breed like crazy, which is great since few of them survive the predators they face for even one year. There are still plenty to go around for hunters, who prize delicious rabbit on their tables and like the way rabbits can be hunted with a variety of methods and a minimum of expensive gear.\n\n242. Watching for the Rabbit You've Jumped\n\nWhen your dog is running a rabbit, don't keep your eyes locked on the path the dog is taking. Keep looking in other directions, and you may spot rabbits that are trying to slip past all the action, or others that are just sitting tight waiting for you to go past.\n\n243. Top Tips for Late Season Rabbits\n\nLate season is a great time to hunt rabbits because deer hunters have ceased activities. Hunting can be tough, though. According to writer Ed Harp on the Indiana state site of Game & Fish magazine, www.indianagameandfish.com, the most important four considerations in finding late season rabbits are to find the clover, find blackberry and raspberry bushes, find the pine sapling stands where rabbits have chewed the bark in a circle, and find deer hunter food plots. Harp has six more top tips to help you get your limit in the article, \"Ten Tips for Taking Winter Rabbits.\"\n\n244. Use a Stick to Beat the Brush\n\nWhen hunting rabbits without a dog, use a brush stick, like a wading staff, to beat on the edges of thick cover where they may be hiding.\n\n245. Cold and Windy Mornings\n\nOn a windy morning, after a very cold night, look for rabbits to be on the sunny and lee sides of ridges, forests, and brush rows.\n\n246. Hunting the \"Slabfoot\" Rabbits\n\nHe's not called the \"Varying Hare\" for nothing, possessing two coats of fur to wear as needed. With the fall sun starts riding lower and lower in the sky, the days becoming shorter and shorter, the Snowshoe rabbit starts putting on its white coat whether needed or not by snowfall. Even with nary a flake on the ground, the big hares begin to change color\u2014a dangerous situation for them since they stand out in the forest so starkly. In Alaska, where I spent two teenage winters, Snowshoe rabbit hunting became a big part of my life. I loved hunting them and eating them.\n\n247. Snowshoes in Winter: The Going Gets Tough\n\nThe hunting in the hills not far from Fairbanks, where we lived, was easy until the snows came, then became more difficult with each passing day. The Snowshoe is mostly a nocturnal animal. During the day the rabbits hole up under the endless spruces and don't move until after dark. Kicking them out is tough work without a dog. When we were lucky enough to get one bounding away through the snow, they were remarkably fast and hard to hit in their great leaps over the snow. Old \"Slabfoot.\" I loved them.\n\n248. The Snowshoes' Survival Plan\n\nWhen winter grips the great North woods, the icy winds moaning through bare limbs without a scrap of vegetation, the snow piling on the endless spruce forests, the Snowshoe rabbit makes out just fine. Gone are the succulent plants of spring and summer, but the \"Varying Hares\" do just fine on a diet of willow, poplar, and other saplings of tender green bark. The Snowshoe has four big front teeth perfect for gnawing a bellyful of bark every night. Days are spent in cozy holes back under the spruces. No matter how cold, they make out just fine.\n\n249. Tactic for Snowshoes: Leave the Feeding Grounds Behind\n\nThe area where you find the great crisscrossing webs of Snowshoe tracks may not be the best place to make your hunt. They were there last night feeding; now they're dead certain to be in the thickest cover of the nearest swamps. That's where you want to make your hunt, moving slowly past the beaver dams, humps of brush, fallen trees, and limbs\u2014the places where Snowshoes spend their days, not their nights.\n\n250. Your Best Rabbit \"Scouts\"\n\nThe best rabbit scout you can find will be the farmer who owns the land you hunt on. Next will be the deer hunters who've been working the area. Many of them aren't interested in rabbit hunting, but they will have seen the spots where rabbits thrive.\n","meta":{"redpajama_set_name":"RedPajamaBook"}}