ibibazo ukwiye kwibaza mbere yuko utandukana n’umukunzi wawe
gutandukana n’umukunzi wawe umugabofianc e si ibintu byoroshye mbahari abatandukana babihubukiye nyuma bakifuza kuba bakongera kubana cyangwa gukundana n’abo bashwanye ugasanga ntibibashobokeye cyangwa bakabigeraho bibagoye cyane dore ibibazo muba mugomba kwibaza mbere gufata umwanzuro gutandukana - ese nagerageje ibishoboka byose twe gutandukana mwagiranye ibihe byiza kenshi kandi igihe kirekire none ntakinyikoza ahora ambwira akazi kabaye kenshi hakaba nubwo muhamagara ntanyitabe ntabwo tukigirana ibihe byiza mbere mfashe umwanzuro ngiye gutandukana nteguza oya banza ugerageze ushoboye umenye impamvu aguha ukuri ndetse unegere inkoramutima zawe zikugire inama mbere gufata icyemezo gutandunana banza ugerageze ibishoboka byose nibinanirana ube ufata umwanzuro gutandukana - ese dufitanye imishinga gihe kizaza dufite icyerekezo kimwe gahunda ziri imbere reba mufite imishinga gihe kizaza tuzabyarana abana bangahe dufite kuzakora n’iki bihe biri imbereniba ubona mudafite icyerekezo kimwe cyangwa hari ibintu byinshi mutumva kimwe kandi atava izima aho ushobora kurekana wumva udashobora kugendera murongo aguha cyangwa wowe umuha cyangwa se mubashe kugirana ibiganiro kugira mwumve ikiri ukuri muzakora cyangwa muzakurikiza buzima bwanyu buri imbere - ese nidutandukana nibwo nzagira ibihe n’ubuzima bwiza kuruta turi kumwe reba mubanye byibuze sawa ahubwo yenda akaba wowe udashobotse ushobora kurebera bandi bagenzi bawe nubwo rukundo buri wese akunda ukwe ariko gereranya urebe nimurekana bizakugendekera neza kurushaho - ese simfashe icyemezo mpubutse cyangwa imburagihe reba neza icyemezo ufashe utagihubukiye reba waragerageje bihagije reba nama inkoramutima zawe zakugiriye waragerageje kuzikurikiza bikanga fata umwanya uhagije n’igihe gihagije kubitekerezaho - ese by’ukuri kuba ngiye gutandukana ndi cyangwa jye munyamafuti zirikana yuko wowe munyamafuti n’undi muzahura uzongera ugongane ese kuba tugiye gutandukana nticyaba ikibazo gishingiye bijyanye gutera akabariro gusa aho uzaba uyobye cyane gerageza gushaka ubundi buryo mwakemura ikibazo ubundi ibintu bigaruke buryo - ese umpemukira njyewe nshobora kubyihanganira kumubabarira kumukosora tudatandukanye ashobora kuba akubeshya aguca inyuma make wumva akugambanira rwose niba wumva udashobora kubyihanganira udashobora kumubabarira kandi akaba atabivaho ushobora gufata umwanzuro rwose mugatandukana gihe muti usigaye wonyine -ese umuryango wange turabyumva kimwe mu kinyarwanda baravuga umutwe umwe wifasha gusara ntiwifasha gutekereza banza urebe muryango wawe babyumva kimwe urugero mama wawe mwene nyoko wibonamoariko nanone ukabigiramo ubwenge kuko ushobora gusanga bakurusha cyangwa bamurusha amafuti - ese si jye nyirabayazana ni ngombwa rwose kwisuzuma ukongera ukisuzuma ukareba neza atari wowe uteza amahane mbese atari wowe nyiri amafuti kutabana neza ubundi nuvumbura wowe nyirabayazana wikosore nusanga atari wowe - ese ubundi nzabasha kumureka neza neza abenshi bafata bene mwanzuro ariko ejo bagatangira kwirirwa barira cyangwa bagata umutwe bumva bashaka gusubirana batandukanye mbese bakumva batabaho batabana batandukanye ni ngombwa kureba ufite imbaraga gufata icyemezo ukanagishyira bikorwa - ese ubundi nubwo nshaka gutandukana ubundi ndacyamukunda cyangwa ntakimbamo niba wumva ukimukunda ukifuza kumubona maso mubyutse ukifuza kumupfumbata nyamuneka itonde kurekana wumva ntacyo akikubwiye wabona utakimukunda mbese utakimwibonamo urumva bijya