A very disappointing stay. These are the issues I encountered, in vague order from worst to negligible:
* The sofa smelled awful — I couldn’t decide if it’s absorbed large quantities of cigarette smoke over the years or whether it’s simply saturated in someone’s sweat. 🤢 It was so bad I had to run some of the separate cushions through the washing machine (the ones which were washable, anyway). This mildly improved the situation, although the sofa itself still stank.
* The oven didn’t work. Completely unacceptable, especially when the listing says the kitchen is a ‘space where guests can cook their own meals’.
* * After I brought this to the host’s attention it took 3 full weeks for them to get it fixed. During this time I had to constantly chase them for updates as they weren’t forthcoming about progress at all.
* * I was notified about one of the engineer’s visits at 3am on the same day, which is incredibly inconsiderate.
* There’s very little insulation or soundproofing on either the windows or the front door, so:
* * There’s significant road noise which persists all day and late into the evening
* * There’s a traffic light right outside the living room, so every now and then you’ll be treated to the bass of somebody’s car music for a couple of minutes until the light changes.
* * The bathroom is always freezing (for context, I was here in January and February)
* * You’ll hear everyone coming up and down the communal staircase
* Whoever lives in the flat next door regularly swears loudly and angrily during the evening. It’s very audible.
* The extractor fan in the kitchen doesn’t work — as soon as you release the buttons it switches off again.
* There was no microwave, and when you couple this with the non-functioning oven the only option for preparing hot food was the hob. This made the property completely unsuitable for a longer stay, and there was no way to know this ahead of time because the listing doesn’t go into detail regarding the kitchen’s amenities.
* All of the non-stick pans are disintegrating — hopefully you enjoy PFAS in your food, yum yum!
* There are no wooden spoons or anything similar, so if you want to stir something in a pan you’ll need to use metal cutlery. It’s almost as if this point and the one above are related somehow… 🤔
* The wardrobe in the carpeted bedroom is unusable without considerable inconvenience because the doors swing open by themselves. The only way I could stop this from happening was by propping and item of furniture in front of the doors at all times.
* The bathroom extractor fan is loud and will probably wake up anyone who’s staying with you if you use the bathroom during the night.
* One of the lamps in the living room is missing a bulb.
* The temperature control on the shower is a bit dodgy, you have to push and hold it in (while turning) to get it to work.
* If you use the dimmer switch in the living room you’ll be subjected to a strobe light display, because the bulb is clearly not a dimmable one. Hopefully you don’t have epilepsy!
* Neither of the two wall-mounted clocks work and both display the incorrect time. (One of them has batteries leaking battery fluid inside — I got curious and checked.)
* The blind in the main bedroom can’t be raised to full height.
* No bins are provided for recycling or food waste, nor are there any instructions as to where these should be disposed of. For anyone in a similar situation:
* * Food waste goes in a separate bin out front (not the black bins). Recycling (including glass) is in the green bins — found by walking to the end of the road (towards the roundabout) and turning left.
* There’s a nail sticking out of the floor in the second bedroom.
There were some positives:
* The location is convenient — only 10 minutes walk to a Sainsburys or a Morrisons, and barely a 5 minute walk to Holyrood Park
* The beds are very comfortable and the bedrooms are quiet
* Everything was very clean (except the sofa)
* The water pressure in the shower is great
I would’ve given a higher rating considering those positives, but my overall impression is that the host cares little about providing a positive guest experience. Out of everything I listed, I only reported the oven to the host during my stay, mostly because that was the only dealbreaker for me, but also because it’s not my job or responsibility to test out hosts’ properties on their behalf. The hassle involved throughout was a significant waste of time and I’ll be seeking a partial refund through the Resolution Centre, on the grounds that the listing was misrepresented.