Forum: ell.stackexchange.com
Tags: <word-request><verbs>
Title: a verb to mean to start "not being on speaking terms"
Question: There are many terms describing 'ending a relationship'. I'm looking for a dynamic (not static) verb to stop a not necessarily romantic or sexual relationship but to stop relationship for example with your family members or intimate friends because of a quarrel or disagreement.    I'm not on speaking terms with my brother.   How do you paraphrase this sentence with an dynamic/active verb?

Answers:
sents: text: The phrase that you are looking for may be as simple as fall out .
text: I cannot think of anything more specific.
text: Certainly, if you fall out with someone, you may no longer be on speaking terms with them.
text: The expression can be used in both everyday and formal English.
text: fall out —
text: phrasal verb with fall (ARGUE) informal to argue with someone and stop being friendly with them:
text: He left home after falling out with his parents.
text: She'd fallen out with her boyfriend over his ex-girlfriend.
text: Cambridge Dictionary
answer_details: author: ell.stackexchange.com/users/40588/Mick
score: 5
sents: text: Piggy-backing off Andrew's answer, the word estrange can be used as a verb, but I don't hear it used that way very often, and it sounds awkward to me when I try to use it that way:
text: He estranged his brother last Christmas after an argument about politics .
text: You can look at this Google ngram and see that the adjective form has become much more popular than the verb form over several decades.
text: However, I looked up the verb estrange in the thesaurus, and found a very suitable synonym: alienate .
text: Unlike estrange , writers use alienate more often as a verb than as an adjective, according to the ngram .
text: So you could say: He alienated his brother last Christmas after an argument about politics .
text: According to NOAD, alienate is defined as: alienate ( verb )
text: cause (someone) to feel isolated or estranged; cause (someone) to become unsympathetic or hostile Looking up alienate in a thesaurus provides some other candidate verbs, such as divide (which is fairly common) and disunite (not so much so).
text: However, I think divide works better in a more passive construct: The brothers were divided last Christmas after an argument about politics .
text: (You wouldn't say, "He divided his brother last Christmas..." – at least, I hope the argument wouldn't get that out of hand.)
answer_details: author: ell.stackexchange.com/users/113/J.R.
score: 3
sents: text: To shun means to avoid or refuse to meet with, usually from anger, contempt or other disapproving sentiment.
text: To spurn means to reject and is more usually used for romantic relations.
text: To cut is a somewhat archaic term that means to express contempt by refusing to acknowledge knowing someone.
text: None of these is exactly right for your use case though.
text: To say "I fell out with him at Christmas" is a slightly unusual application of the expression, but admirably clear, while retaining a polite ambiguity as to just who is shunning whom.
text: An American in this context might say, "I cut off contact with him".
text: But, really, I don't think we have an active verb for exactly what you're requesting
text: – I feel pretty sure, given how much people in my family do this, I would have heard such an expression by now if there were one!
answer_details: author: ell.stackexchange.com/users/5890/Codeswitcher
score: 2
sents: text: The word you're looking for is "estranged" -- meaning, "to be like a stranger with".
text: It is used for family or friends who once were close but who now, for some reason, are very distant.
text: He has been estranged from his family for decades and never talks about them.
text: People who are estranged can be reconciled .
text: The estranged brothers were reconciled by the death of their beloved mother.
answer_details: author: ell.stackexchange.com/users/42184/Andrew
score: 1
sents: text: How about He was ostracized after behaving badly at Christmas dinner.
text: They are ostracizing him after he behaved badly at Christmas dinner.
text: For your example, you might say
text: I am avoiding
text: my brother.
text: She is ignoring her ex these days.
text: both imply recent noncommunication.
answer_details: author: ell.stackexchange.com/users/26439/Peter
score: 1

Summary of the answers:
Suggested words and  phrases include to fall out, to be divided, to be alienated, to shun, to spurn, to cut off contact, to be estranged, or to be ostracized.
Although it is believed that there is no active verb with the exact same meaning, a simple synonym for this would be "fall out". Other words that could replace it are: "divide", "alienate", "shun", "spurn", "cut" (more old-fashioned), "cut off contact" (mainly US Enlglish speakers), "estranged", "ostracized".