TRAUMATIC EVENTS – CHILDREN 

Tips for Responding to Children and Youth 

after Traumatic Events 

Traumatic events, such as natural disasters, shootings, bombings, or other violent acts, can leave 

children feeling frightened, confused, and insecure. 

Whether a child has personally experienced trauma, has seen the event on television, or has merely 

heard it discussed by adults, it is important for parents and educators to be informed and ready to 

help if stress reactions begin to occur. 

Children respond to trauma in many different ways. Some may have reactions very soon after the 

event; others may do fine for weeks or months and then begin to show troubling behavior. Knowing 

the signs that are common at different ages can help parents and teachers recognize problems and 

respond appropriately. 

Preschool Age 

Children ages 1–5 find it particularly hard to adjust to change and loss. These youngsters have not 

yet developed their own coping skills, so they must depend on parents, family members, and 

teachers to help them through difficult times. 

Young children may regress to an earlier behavioral stage after a violent or traumatic event. 

Preschoolers may resume thumb sucking or bed–wetting, or may become afraid of strangers, 

animals, darkness, or “monsters.” They may cling to a parent or teacher, or become very attached to 

a place where they feel safe. Changes in eating and sleeping habits are common, as are 

unexplainable aches and pains. 

Other symptoms to watch for are disobedience, hyperactivity, speech difficulties, and aggressive or 

withdrawn behavior. Preschoolers may tell exaggerated stories about the traumatic event or may 

refer to it repeatedly. 

Early Childhood 

Children ages 5–11 may have some of the same reactions that younger children have. They also may 

withdraw from playgroups and friends, compete more for the attention of parents, fear going to 

school, allow school performance to drop, become aggressive, or find it hard to concentrate. These 

children also may return to more childish behaviors, such as asking to be fed or dressed. 

Adolescence 

Children ages 12–14 are likely to have vague physical complaints when under stress and may 

abandon chores, schoolwork, or other responsibilities they previously handled. Though they may 

compete vigorously for attention from parents and teachers, they also may withdraw, resist 

authority, become disruptive at home or in the classroom, or begin to experiment with high–risk 

behaviors such as alcohol or drug use. 

This material was developed exclusively at private expense by Magellan Behavioral Health and its subcontractors and constitutes 

limited rights data/restricted computer software consistent with the provisions of FAR 52.227-14. Use of this material is authorized 

in connection with EAP services provided by Magellan Behavioral Health under contract no. HHSP23320075300DC and conveys no 

additional rights beyond those noted here. 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

These young people are at a developmental stage in which the opinions of others are very 

important. They need to be thought of as “normal” by their friends, and are less concerned about 

relating well with adults or participating in family activities they once enjoyed. 

In later adolescence, teens may experience feelings of helplessness and guilt because they are 

unable to assume full adult responsibilities as the community responds to the traumatic event. 

Older teens may deny the extent of their reactions to the traumatic event. 

How to Help 

Reassurance is the key to helping children through a traumatic time. Very young children need a lot 

of cuddling as well as verbal support. Answer questions about the event honestly, but do not dwell 

on frightening details or allow the subject to dominate family or classroom time indefinitely. 

Encourage children of all ages to express emotions through conversation, writing, or artwork; and 

to find a way to help others who were affected by the event. 

Try to maintain a normal household or classroom routine, and encourage children to participate in 

recreational activity. Temporarily reduce your expectations about performance in school or at 

home, perhaps by substituting less demanding responsibilities for normal chores. 

Acknowledge that you, too, may have reactions associated with the traumatic event, and take steps 

to promote your own physical and emotional healing. 

Tips for Talking to Children After a Traumatic Event 

• Provide children with opportunities to talk about what they are seeing on television and to 

ask questions. 

• Do not be afraid to admit that you cannot answer all of their questions. 

• Answer questions at a level the children can understand. 

• Provide ongoing opportunities for children to talk. They probably will have more questions 

as time goes on. 

• Use this as an opportunity to establish a family emergency plan. Feeling that there is 

something you can do may be very comforting to both children and adults. 

• Allow children to discuss other fears and concerns about unrelated issues. This is a good 

opportunity to explore these issues also. 

• Monitor children’s television watching. Some parents may wish to limit their child’s 

exposure to graphic or troubling scenes. To the extent possible, be present when your child 

is watching news coverage of the event. It is at these times that questions might arise. 

• Help children understand that there are no bad emotions and that a wide range of reactions 

is normal. Encourage children to express their feelings to adults (including teachers) who 

can help them understand their sometimes strong and troubling emotions. 

• Be careful not to scapegoat or generalize about any particular cultural or ethnic group. Try 

not to focus on blame. 

• In addition to the tragic things they see, help children identify good things, such as heroic 

actions, families who unite and share support, and the assistance offered by people 

throughout the community. 

When Talking isn't Enough 

For some children more active interventions may be required, particularly if they were more 

directly affected by the traumatic event. 

• The family, as a unit, might consider counseling. 

This material was developed exclusively at private expense by Magellan Behavioral Health and its subcontractors and constitutes 

limited rights data/restricted computer software consistent with the provisions of FAR 52.227-14. Use of this material is authorized 

in connection with EAP services provided by Magellan Behavioral Health under contract no. HHSP23320075300DC and conveys no 

additional rights beyond those noted here. 
 

 

 

 

 

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• Traumatic events often reawaken a child’s fear of loss of parents (frequently a child’s 

greatest fear) at a time when parents may be preoccupied with their own practical and 

emotional difficulties. 

• Families may choose to permit temporary regressive behavior. Several arrangements may 

help children separate gradually after the agreed–upon time limit: spending extra time with 

parents immediately before bedtime, leaving the child’s bedroom door slightly ajar, and 

using a night–light. 

• Many parents have their own fears of leaving a child alone after a traumatic event or other 

fears they may be unable to acknowledge. Parents often are more able to seek help on the 

children’s behalf and may, in fact, use the children’s problems as a way of asking for help for 

themselves and other family members. 

• Teachers also can help children with art and play activities, as well as by encouraging group 

discussions in the classroom and informational presentations about the traumatic event. 

Resources Are Available 

Additional information, self-help tools and other resources are available online at 

www.FOH4YOU.com. Or call us for more information, help and support. Counselors are available 24 

hours a day, seven days a week to provide confidential assistance at no cost to you. 

This material was developed exclusively at private expense by Magellan Behavioral Health and its subcontractors and constitutes 

limited rights data/restricted computer software consistent with the provisions of FAR 52.227-14. Use of this material is authorized 

in connection with EAP services provided by Magellan Behavioral Health under contract no. HHSP23320075300DC and conveys no 

additional rights beyond those noted here.