Can I catch it?

My Sibling Has a

Fetal Alcohol
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS 

This booklet was prepared for the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) by

Northrop Grumman Health Solutions under contract number 277-01-6068 with SAMHSA, U.S. Department of Health

and Human Services (DHHS). Ammie A. Bonsu, MPH, served as the Government Project Officer. 

DISCLAIMER 

The views, opinions, and content of this booklet are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views,

opinions, or policies of SAMHSA, or DHHS. 

PUBLIC DOMAIN NOTICE 

All material appearing in this booklet is in the public domain and may be reproduced or copied without permission

from SAMHSA. Citation of the source is appreciated. However, this publication may not be reproduced or distributed

for a fee without the specific, written authorization of the Office of Communications, SAMHSA, DHHS. 

COPIES OF PUBLICATION 

For additional free copies of this document, please call SAMHSA’s National Clearinghouse for Alcohol and Drug

Information at 1-800-729-6686 or 1-800-487-4889 (TDD). 

RECOMMENDED CITATION 

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration. My Sibling Has a Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder.

Can I Catch It? DHHS Pub. No. (SMA) 06-4247. Rockville, MD: Center for Substance Abuse Prevention, Substance

Abuse and Mental health Services Administration, 2006. 

ORIGINATING OFFICE 

Division of Knowledge Application and Systems Improvement, Center for Substance Abuse Prevention, 

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, 1 Choke Cherry Road, Rockville, MD 20850 

DHHS Booklet Pub. No. (SMA) 06-4247

Printed 2006
Having a brother or sister can be

fun. It can also be tough. They don’t

always do what you’d like. Or say what

you’d like. Sometimes they embarrass you. 

If your sibling is different from everyone else, 

it’s even harder. 

Your sibling has a fetal alcohol spectrum disorder,

or an FASD. It can be hard to understand and

scary to think about. 

This booklet can help answer some questions

you may have. It tells you about FASD and

helps you explore your feelings. It also shares

ways to get help. And it has some fun games

at the end.

Want to know more about FASD? Visit the Web site of

the SAMHSA Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders Center for

Excellence at fasdcenter.samhsa.gov. You can also call 

866-STOPFAS (866-786-7327). Or you can e-mail the Center

at fasdcenter@samhsa.gov. Remember, you are not alone.

1

What’s This Booklet About?
What Are Fetal Alcohol

Spectrum Disorders?

Fetal alcohol spectrum

disorders, or FASD, can

happen to kids whose

moms drink alcohol

when they’re pregnant.

The alcohol gets into the

baby’s body and hurts the

brain. It can also hurt the

bones and other organs.

There are different types of

fetal alcohol spectrum 

disorders, like fetal alcohol

syndrome, or FAS. Kids

with FAS look different.

They are small for their

age. They have small

eyes and thin upper lips.

The area between their

nose and upper lip is

smooth. Most people have a

ridge there called a philtrum. 

Other kids with an FASD look like

you and me. But they have

trouble learning and getting

along. They also might have

problems seeing, hearing,

talking, or paying 

attention.

Some kids with an FASD

have problems with

math. Many kids can’t

tell time or count

money. They may not

understand what

you’re saying and may

not laugh at your jokes.

Some have trouble sitting

still or waiting in line.

Having an FASD makes life very hard.

Is There Anything

Good About FASD?

All kids are special. Kids with an

FASD have good things about them,

2
just like other kids. They can be very friendly and

cheerful. They can have lots of energy and work

hard. They’re often kind to younger kids and 

animals. 

Kids with an FASD like to help out and want to be

liked. And they tend to play fair. You and your 

siblings with an FASD can teach each other and

learn from each other. 

Sometimes My Sibling Is a Pain.

Is It O.K. To Be Mad or Do I Have To Be Extra Nice

Because My Sibling Has an FASD?

It’s o.k. to have all kinds of feelings. Just remember

that your brother or sister can’t help it. Kids with an

FASD can’t always control how they act or what

they say. They might walk up to strangers and

say hi. You might get mad at them or be

embarrassed. Talking to an adult or friend

can help.

Some kids feel guilty that they are o.k.

while their sibling has an FASD.

Remember, you didn’t cause your sibling’s

disability and you can’t make it go away. If

3
your brother or sister does 

something wrong, it’s o.k. to say so.

You might have to say it over and

over. Kids with an FASD don’t

always remember the rules. And if

your sibling never gets it, just walk

away. Fighting won’t help.

Can I Catch an FASD?

No. Kids are born with an FASD.

FASD is only caused when a 

mom drinks alcohol while she 

is pregnant. You can’t catch it.

Accepting kids with an FASD can

help them a lot. They often feel left

out and get ignored because other 

kids are afraid 

or think they’re

weird. You

can help your

sibling by

letting your

friends know

about FASD.

Mom and Dad Are So Busy

Taking Care of My Sibling I

Feel Like I Don’t Exist.

How Can I Get Their Attention?

Many kids whose siblings have 

an FASD feel jealous of all the

attention their siblings get. It 

doesn’t seem fair. You still need 

and deserve attention. 

Tell your parents how you feel. 

Set aside time alone with one or

both of them. Making your time

with Mom or Dad part of the 

schedule might help.

I Feel Like the Only Kid

Whose Sibling Has an FASD.

Where Can I Find Others?

You might feel all alone and think

no one else has the same feelings

or experiences. But you’re not

alone. Sadly, many women drink

4
alcohol when they’re pregnant, so a lot of

kids have an FASD. Some places have

groups for siblings to share their 

feelings and help each other. One

place that you or your parents can

call is The Arc at 206-297-6368. Or

visit their Web site at

www.thearc.org.

Why Do We Have To Go to All These

Therapy Sessions? It’s Boring.

Some kids with an FASD need help learning how

to do things. This is called therapy. There are

many kinds of therapy. Physical therapy helps kids

move around. Occupational therapy can help with

everyday tasks, like brushing your teeth. Some

kids need speech therapy to help them talk. And

some need counseling to help them deal with their

feelings about FASD and other problems.

You might need to go to your sibling’s therapy 

sessions. Being stuck in a waiting room can be

boring, so bring a book or some games to keep

you busy. It might be important to participate in

therapy like counseling to share your thoughts and

5
feelings. If not, ask about what your

sibling does in therapy. You can

learn ways to help and you might

find it interesting.

My Parents Ask Me To Help

Take Care of My Sibling.

Am I Stuck Doing That Because of

His or Her FASD?

Taking care of your sibling is nice,

but it’s not your job. Talk to your

parents if you feel like

they’re asking you to

do too much. And if

your sibling has a

tantrum or might get

hurt, get your parents

right away. Don’t try

to handle it yourself.

Do help when you can.

Your sibling may watch

to see how you do

things. Teaching him or her can

make you feel better about 

yourself. It can also help you

understand what your sibling is

going through.

I Want To Help My Sibling But

I Don’t Know What To Do.

How Can I Help?

You have a special role in teaching

your sibling. You can help by nicely

reminding him or her to do

things. You can repeat things if

he or she doesn’t understand or

forgets. You can help your 

sibling with homework or

chores. You can play games or

sing or listen to music. Look for

things your sibling likes that

you can do together. 

Also be careful about what you

say. Slang is fun with your

6
friends, but kids with an FASD don’t always 

understand it. If you ask, “What’s up?” your sibling

might look up to see what’s there. So try to say

exactly what you mean, like, “What are you doing?”

or “How are you feeling?”

Do I Have To Be “Super Kid” To Make Up

for My Sibling’s FASD?

Some siblings feel like they have to do extra well 

to make up for their brother or sister’s FASD. You

might think getting straight A’s or winning at sports

will make your parents feel better. You don’t have

to do that. Just be yourself. Do your best because 

it makes you happy.

Your sibling may not be able to do all the things

you can, but he or she can do other things.

Remember, your parents can be proud of you 

and your sibling for whatever you each can do. 

7

I didn’t Cause it.

I can’t Cure it.

I can’t Control it.

I can take better

Care of myself

by Communicating

my feelings and

making healthy

Choices, and

Celebrating myself.

National Association for

Children of Alcoholics

The Seven Cs
Why Do Mothers Drink Alcohol

When They Are Pregnant?

Don’t They Know It Can Hurt Their

Baby?

Moms don’t hurt their babies on

purpose. Some moms drink alcohol

before they know they are pregnant.

Others need help to stop drinking

alcohol. So don’t blame your mom

or your sibling’s mom, because she

didn’t hurt your siblings on 

purpose. Blaming her won’t help

your sibling. 

If you think your

mom is drinking

too much, you

might want to call

Al-Anon/Alateen at

1-888-4AL-ANON

(1-888-425-2666)

or the National

Association for

Children of

Alcoholics (301-468-0985). Talking

to a teacher, counselor, or adult

friend or relative may also help.

I Don’t Know Much About

FASD. 

Where Can I Learn More?

You can check your local library or

your school library. There’s also a

lot of information on the Web. You

can try the FASD Center for

Excellence (fasdcenter.samhsa.gov),

The Arc (www.thearc.org), and the

National Organization on Fetal

Alcohol Syndrome (www.nofas.org). 

Congratulations!

Now that you know about FASD,

you can help your sibling. O.k., it’s

time for some games. Have fun!

8
9

Games
Word Search

Find the words in the list below and circle them.

ALATEEN

ALCOHOL

ATTENTION

CELEBRATING

CHEERFUL

COMMUNICATING

COUNSELING

DISABILITY

DISORDERS

EMBARRASSED

FETAL

FRIENDLY

GUILTY

JEALOUS

PREGNANT

SIBLING

SPECIAL

SPECTRUM

TANTRUM

THERAPY

G U I L T Y U ND H L S T E G

L C X N I Y C XG X A U A M N

LU F R E E H CF Y T ON B I

MO N K D V J G X W E L T A L

Y T I L I B ASI D F A R R E

Y P A R E H T GO B G E U R S

G N I T A R B EL E C J MAN

C O M M U N I CA T I N G S U

SR E D RO S IDAA L S SO

R WQ H T Q U RH L L A I E C

Y L D N E I R FA A C I B DQ

A T T E N T I ON T O C L L J

X S P E C T R UM E H E I C C

TN A NGE R PP E O P N C E

X C Z L Q Q E O MN L S G WO 10
11

Double Puzzle

Unscramble each of the clue words. Copy the letters in the numbered boxes to the

boxes at the bottom with the same number. When you’re done, you’ll reveal an

important message.

4

18 2 10 8

6

5

11 16 1 17

9 19

14 12

20

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

W

11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20

7 15 3 13

TEFAL

LAOCHLO

RISSDEDRO

CPLISEA

TEPNARGN

BIILGNS

RNDIK

RATPEYH
12

Maze

Jimmy has an FASD. Follow the maze to help him get to the school bus.
13

Answer Key
14

Word Search

GU I L T Y U ND H L S T E G

L C X N I Y C XG X A U A M N

LU F R E E H CF Y T O N B I

MO N K D V J G X W E L T A L

YT I L I B A S I D F A R R E

Y P A R E H T GO B G E U R S

GN I T A R B E L E C J M A N

C O M M U N I CA T I N G S U

SR E D RO S ID A A L S S O

RW Q H T Q U RH L L A I E C

YL D N E I R FA A C I B D Q

A T T E N T I ON T O C L L J

X S P E C T R UM E H E I C C

T N A N G E R PP E O P N C E

X C Z L Q Q E OM N L S G W O
15

Double Puzzle

Unscrambled Words

Fetal

Alcohol

Disorders

Special

Pregnant

Sibling

Drink

Therapy

Message: No alcohol 

when pregnant.

Maze
16

Things to Talk About

Here are some things you can talk about with your parents.

1) What did you learn?

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

2) How can you help your sibling?

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

3) Where can you go to find more information on FASD?

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

Stop and think. If you’re pregnant, don’t drink.

For more information, visit fasdcenter.samhsa.gov or call 866-STOPFAS.

www.stopalcoholabuse.gov

DHHS Publication No. (SMA) 06-4247

Printed 2006