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BULLETIN FOR 

PROFESSIONALS

September 2016

Working With Lesbian, 

Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, 

and Questioning (LGBTQ) 

Families in Foster Care and 

Adoption

WHAT’S INSIDE

Getting to know the 

LGBTQ community

Language and 

terminology

Advantages of including 

LGBTQ families

Tips for effective 

recruitment/retention

Challenges faced by 

LGBTQ adoptive parents

Possible challenges 

professionals face while 

working with LGBTQ 

families

Tips for representing 

LGBTQ families as 

potential adoptive 

parents

Supporting transgender 

parents

The basics of creating a 

welcoming agency

Conclusion

References

During the last decade, child welfare professionals 

and agencies alike have welcomed the increasing 

visibility of families headed by LGBTQ parents. A 

growing number of agencies in the United States, 

both public and private, have established more 

supportive practices and are becoming increasingly 

proactive in recruiting families within the LGBTQ 

community, which means a larger pool of highly 

motivated and qualified prospective parents for 

children who need them. As written in the American 

Academy of Pediatrics (2013) policy statement titled 

Promoting the Well-being of Children Whose Parents 

Are Gay or Lesbian, “Scientific evidence affirms that 

children have similar developmental and emotional 

needs and receive similar parenting whether they are 

raised by parents of the same or different genders.” 
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Despite progress, including the landmark 2015 decision 

by the U.S. Supreme Court to ensure marriage equality 

nationwide, in many parts of the country, laws, agency 

policies, and professional biases continue to present 

obstacles for some LGBTQ individuals and couples. 

What often stands in the way for many professionals 

is misinformation and/or inexperience in working with 

LGBTQ families. This bulletin is designed to help child 

welfare and adoption professionals expand their cultural 

competence and skills when working with LGBTQ 

individuals and same-sex couples. It also examines laws 

and policies and provides tips to engage this vital and 

distinct community effectively.

Getting to Know the LGBTQ 

Community

The LGBTQ community is as diverse as the general 

public. It includes all races, ethnicities, income levels, and 

educational backgrounds, as well as rural, suburban, and 

urban dwellers. Among different ethnic groups, religious 

traditions, and cultures, the topics of sexual orientation 

and gender identity and gender expression are viewed 

and addressed differently. Child welfare professionals 

can anticipate significant variation among LGBTQ foster 

and adoptive families. For example, LGBTQ families may 

differ in the level of acceptance they experience among 

their families of origin, what terms and language they use 

to identify themselves and any partner (if applicable), and 

the extent to which they are honest and “out” about their 

own identity and relationship status.

It’s important to understand that many LGBTQ individuals 

and same-sex couples may choose to share very little 

of their personal lives with their families of origin, 

professional colleagues, or neighbors due to fear of being 

stigmatized, rejected, or physically abused. It may also be 

because their own cultural norms and traditions dictate 

that one’s personal life should be kept private. There are 

many LGBTQ adults who have had unconditional support 

from their parents, extended family, and friends and who 

are pursuing parenthood with a solid network of support. 

Professionals can expect that any assumptions they may 

have about the LGBTQ community will most likely be 

tested along the way.

In recent years, a growing body of research on LGBTQ 

parents and their children clearly affirms the ability of 

LGBTQ individuals and same-sex couples to parent, 

alleviating myths and concerns about the negative impact 

on children raised by LGBTQ parents. It is essential that 

professionals have access to and can draw from evidencebased information about LGBTQ families as they make 

decisions that are in the best interests of children. This 

body of knowledge reminds professionals not to overlook 

the great potential of LGBTQ families to become loving, 

permanent homes for infants, children, and youth.

Below is a brief snapshot of the more than 30 years of 

research that supports LGBTQ individuals as parents:

 Children raised by LGBTQ parents do not differ in any 

key areas of adjustment or functioning (Goldberg, 

2009), and they do not experience any difference in 

outcomes compared to children from other parenting 

arrangements (Adams & Light, 2015).

 There is no evidence that having a transgender parent 

affects a child’s gender identity or sexual orientation, 

and it does not negatively impact other developmental 

milestones (Stotzer, Herman, & Hasenbush, 2014).

 Strengths typically associated with married motherfather families appear to the same extent in families 

with two mothers and potentially in those with two 

fathers (Biblarz & Stacey, 2010).

 Measures of children’s adjustment, parenting 

approaches, parenting stress, and couple relationship 

adjustment are not significantly associated with 

parental sexual orientation (Farr, Forssell, & Patterson, 

2010).

 Adults who have been raised by LGBTQ parents report 

feeling more tolerant of all types of human diversity 

(Stacey & Biblarz, 2001).

 The sexual orientation of youth does not have any 

correlation with the sexual orientation of the families in 

which they were raised (Golombok & Tasker, 1996).
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For more studies of LGBTQ parents and families, you 

can visit the Human Rights Campaign at http://www.hrc.

org/resources/social-science-research or Columbia Law 

School at http://whatweknow.law.columbia.edu/topics/

lgbt-equality/what-does-the-scholarly-research-say-aboutthe-wellbeing-of-children-with-gay-or-lesbian-parents/.

Language and Terminology

The terms, expressions, and ways of defining oneself 

are often tied to cultural understandings of sexuality 

and gender and are often influenced by popular culture, 

generational experience, religious upbringing, and/or 

region of the country. Additionally, like most groups, the 

language and terminology used within and about the 

LGBTQ community has evolved over time. For example, 

many younger LGBTQ Americans have reclaimed the 

term “queer” and may choose that term to self-identify. 

Other terms might include “same-gender loving,” having 

a “fluid” sexuality, or identifying as “two-spirit” for 

American Indian and Alaska Native individuals. 

The following is a glossary of terms and definitions 

recommended for professionals to become familiar with 

as they work amidst the diverse LGBTQ community.1

1 Adapted from the Human Rights Campaign and used with permission.

Ally: A person who is not LGBTQ but shows support for 

LGBTQ people and promotes equality.

Androgynous: Identifying and/or presenting as neither 

distinguishably masculine nor feminine.

Asexual: The lack of a sexual attraction or desire for other 

people.

Biphobia: Prejudice, fear, or hatred directed toward 

bisexual people.

Bisexual: A person emotionally, romantically, or sexually 

attracted to more than one sex, gender, or gender 

identity, though not necessarily simultaneously, in the 

same way, or to the same degree.

Cisgender: A term used to describe a person whose 

gender identity aligns with those typically associated with 

the sex assigned to them at birth.

Closeted: Describes an LGBTQ person who has not 

disclosed their sexual orientation or gender identity.

Coming out: The process in which a person first 

acknowledges, accepts, and appreciates his or her sexual 

orientation or gender identity and begins to share that 

with others.

Gay: A person who is emotionally, romantically, or 

sexually attracted to members of the same gender.

Gender expression: External appearance of one’s 

gender identity, usually expressed through behavior, 

clothing, haircut, or voice, which may or may not conform 

to socially defined behaviors and characteristics typically 

associated with being either masculine or feminine.

Gender identity: One’s innermost concept of self as 

male, female, a blend of both, or neither – how individuals 

perceive themselves and what they call themselves. One’s 

gender identity can be the same or different from their 

sex assigned at birth.

Gender nonconforming: A broad term referring to 

people who do not behave in a way that conforms to the 

traditional expectations of their gender or whose gender 

expression does not fit neatly into a category.

Gender roles: The set of roles and behaviors assigned 

to or imposed upon females and males by society and/or 

culture.

Genderqueer: People who typically reject notions of 

static categories of gender and embrace a fluidity of 

gender identity and often, though not always, sexual 

orientation. People who identify as “genderqueer” may 

see themselves as being both male and female, neither 

male nor female, or as falling completely outside these 

categories.

Gender transition: The process by which some people 

strive to align more closely their internal knowledge 

of gender with its outward appearance. Some people 

socially transition, whereby they might begin dressing, 

using names and pronouns, and/or be socially recognized 

as another gender. Others undergo physical transitions 

in which they modify their bodies through medical 

interventions.
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Heterosexism: The societal or institutional assumption 

that heterosexuality is the only valid sexual orientation 

and is superior or preferable to being lesbian, gay, or 

bisexual. 

Homophobia: The fear and hatred of or discomfort with 

people who are attracted to members of the same sex.

Lesbian: A woman who is emotionally, romantically, or 

sexually attracted to other women.

Living openly: A state in which LGBTQ people are 

comfortably out about their sexual orientation or gender 

identity where and when it feels appropriate to them.

Outing: Exposing someone’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, or 

transgender identity to others without their permission. 

Outing someone can have serious repercussions on 

employment, economic stability, personal safety, or 

religious or family situations.

Queer: A term people often use to express fluid identities 

and orientations. Often used interchangeably with 

“LGBTQ.”

Questioning: A term used to describe people who are in 

the process of exploring their sexual orientation or 

gender identity.

Same-gender loving: A term some prefer to use instead 

of lesbian, gay, or bisexual to express attraction to and 

love of people of the same gender.

Sexual orientation: An inherent or immutable enduring 

emotional, romantic, or sexual attraction to other people.

Transgender: An umbrella term for people whose gender 

identity and/or expression is different from cultural 

expectations based on the sex they were assigned at 

birth. Being transgender does not imply any specific 

sexual orientation; therefore, transgender people may 

identify as straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, etc.

Transphobia: The fear and hatred of, or discomfort with, 

transgender people.

Two-spirit: A term for both same-gender and 

transgender people that emerged from various Native 

American/First Nations traditions. This term is not openly 

used by all Native American/First Nation populations. 

Advantages of Including LGBTQ 

Families

There are numerous benefits to establishing agency 

policies and practices that welcome and support LGBTQ 

families, not to mention the extensive research 

demonstrating their myriad capacities as parents. 

Adoption is often an LGBTQ individual’s or couple’s first 

choice for building their family, making them a highly 

motivated resource (Turner, 1999). According to 

AdoptUSKids, LGBTQ families bring particular strengths 

to parenting children in foster care, including an ability to 

identify with difficult feelings of isolation or a sense of 

being “different” (McRoy, Ayers-Lopez, AdoptUSKids 

Education Team, & University of Texas at Austin, 2010). 

Even children adopted as infants will often go through 

periods of questioning or wrestling with their identity. 

The more than 415,000 children and youth currently in 

foster care in the United States (U.S. Department of 

Health and Human Services, 2014) have diverse 

backgrounds, identities, and needs, requiring child 

welfare agencies to recruit an equally diverse pool of 

families to provide loving and stable homes. Though not 

the only potential placement option, LGBTQ parents may 

be considered for LGBTQ youth, who are often 

overrepresented in the foster care population compared 

to their peers in the general population (Wilson, Cooper, 

Kastanis, & Nezhad, 2014). One study indicates between 7 

and 27 percent of youth in foster care identify as 

something other than 100 percent heterosexual (Courtney 

et al., 2011). LGBTQ individuals and same-sex couples 

represent an often untapped resource of potential 

parents for the thousands of children and youth in the 

foster care system who need loving, permanent homes. 

Professionals should keep in mind that every prospective 

foster or adoptive parent should be considered on a 

case-by-case basis for a possible match. 
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Tips for Effective Recruitment/

Retention

For public agencies, expanding the pool of qualified 

resource families is a high priority and essential in 

meeting the permanency goals of children and youth 

in foster care. Targeted recruitment within the LGBTQ 

community is an important part of this process and can 

be folded in to existing efforts. Agencies interested in 

expanding recruitment and implementing best practices 

in retaining LGBTQ families may want to consider the 

following:2

2 Adapted from Human Rights Campaign Foundation. (2009). Promising 

practices in adoption and foster care: A comprehensive guide to policies 

and practices that welcome affirm and support lesbian, gay, bisexual, 

and transgender foster and adoptive parents (3rd Ed). Retrieved from 

http://familybuilders.org/sites/default/files/pdf/HRCFoundation_

PromisingPracticeGuide_3rdEdition_Color.pdf, and National Resource 

Center for Adoption, National Resource Center for Permanency and Family 

Connections, & National Resource Center for Diligent Recruitment at 

AdoptUSKids. (2012). Strategies for recruiting lesbian, gay, bisexual, and 

transgender foster, and adoptive, and kinship families. Retrieved from http://

adoptuskids.org/_assets/files/strategies-for-recruiting-LGBT-foster-adoptivekinship-families.pdf. 

 Ensure that staff and volunteers are comfortable 

talking about diverse families and will make an effort 

to speak directly to and about the LGBTQ resource 

families who are part of your program.

 Provide opportunities for staff who lack experience 

working with the LGBTQ population to gain experience 

and cultural competence before conducting a family 

assessment or home study.

 Ensure that your agency has a means of educating staff 

to be culturally competent and communicate that as an 

expectation.

 Develop new materials, or modify existing materials, to 

reflect your agency’s policy regarding LGBTQ resource 

families. Include photos of diverse families as well as 

specific language and images that resonate with the 

community. 

 Reach out to local LGBTQ community or advocacy 

centers, media, and key LGBTQ leaders to establish 

partnerships.

 Host a recruitment activity at a local LGBTQ venue or 

event or in a neighborhood that is LGBTQ-friendly.

 Ask current LGBTQ resource families to speak at events 

and to network in their own community. Word of 

mouth is often the most effective recruitment method.

 Seek out religious congregations that are welcoming 

and affirming—those more likely to have LGBTQ 

congregants—if you are engaged in faith-based 

recruitment efforts.

 Ensure that the “waiting” families group is inclusive 

of LGBTQ individuals and couples and that there is 

ongoing communication with these families while they 

are in the process.

Additionally, the National Resource Center for Diligent 

Recruitment at AdoptUSKids has several resources on 

targeted recruitment and supportive services for the 

LGBTQ community that you may find helpful:

 Barriers and Success Factors in Adoption From Foster 

Care: Perspectives of Lesbian and Gay Families: 

http://adoptuskids.org/_assets/files/6-LGBT_Parents_

Report_Exec_Sum-final_NewBrandingOctober2013.

pdf

 Perspectives of Youth Adopted From Foster Care by 

Lesbian and Gay Parents: 

http://adoptuskids.org/_assets/files/NRCRRFAP/

resources/perspectives-of-youth-adopted-from-fostercare-by-lesbian-and-gay-parents.pdf

 Strategies for Recruiting Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and 

Transgender Foster, Adoptive, and Kinship Families: 

http://www.nrcdr.org/_assets/files/strategies-forrecruiting-LGBT-foster-adoptive-kinship-families.pdf

 Recruiting and Retaining LGBT Foster, Adoptive, and 

Kinship Families: Sending a Welcoming Message: 

http://adoptuskids.org/_assets/files/NRCRRFAP/

resources/recruiting-and-retaining-lgbt-foster-andadoptive-families.pdf
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Challenges Faced by LGBTQ Adoptive 

Parents

While there has been an increase in inclusive policies 

and practices in both public and private agencies, prospective LGBTQ foster and adoptive parents continue 

to face some unique challenges. Historically, LGBTQ 

parents have been considered as a resource for “certain 

children.” Child welfare and adoption agencies have 

come a long way, but agencies must strive to maintain an 

environment that is inclusive, nonbiased, and strengthsbased and in which each person or couple is assessed 

independently and objectively. More information and 

guidance about the home study and assessment process 

for LGBTQ prospective foster and adoptive families can 

be found at https://library.childwelfare.gov/cwig/ws/

library/docs/gateway/Record?w=NATIVE%28%27SIMPLE_

SRCH+ph+is+%27%27LGBT+Prospective+Foster+and+-

Adoptive+Families%27%27%27%29&upp=0&order=native%28%27year%2FDescend%27%29&rpp=25&r=1&m=1&.

Additionally, the following tips are important to keep in 

mind during the process:31

3 Adapted from Human Rights Campaign Foundation. (2009). Promising 

practices in adoption and foster care: A comprehensive guide to policies 

and practices that welcome affirm and support lesbian, gay, bisexual, 

and transgender foster and adoptive parents (3rd Ed). Retrieved from 

http://familybuilders.org/sites/default/files/pdf/HRCFoundation_

PromisingPracticeGuide_3rdEdition_Color.pdf.

 Like all prospective adoptive parents, LGBTQ 

individuals and couples will have varying ideas about 

the age, race, and background of children they feel 

able to adopt. Be open to listening and respecting their 

fears, hopes, and concerns.

 Do not assume that prospective LGBTQ parents will 

want to, or be best suited to, raise LGBTQ youth. In 

some cases, this may prove to be an effective match, 

but best practices dictate that matching prospective 

parents with waiting children should be done on a caseby-case basis.

 Prospective LGBTQ parents often fear that they will be 

more highly scrutinized or held to different standards 

than their heterosexual counterparts. Make it clear that 

your agency does not discriminate and ensure that this 

is truly the case. Provide realistic information about the 

adoption process, the home study and what it entails, 

the waiting period, and any fees or subsidies. If possible, 

provide such information to all families together so that 

they hear consistent information at the same time. If 

there are going to be different issues for your LGBTQ 

families, let them know well in advance so they will not 

feel misled.

 Encourage LGBTQ families to connect with other waiting 

families or support groups for adoptive parents. The 

ability to talk to other families—gay and straight—is 

essential.

 If you are aware of discrimination in placement decisions 

within your agency or among the agencies with which 

you routinely work, talk to your supervisor or manager. 

The agency should make a plan to address such concerns 

effectively. It may be helpful to provide educational 

materials to your colleagues, such as the research on 

LGBTQ parenting provided earlier.

 The Family Equality Council (http://www.familyequality.

org/) connects, supports, and represents LGBTQ parents 

across the country. It may be helpful to connect current 

or future LGBTQ adoptive parents to support groups or 

LGBTQ-friendly networks who are able to help them 

through the process.42

4 For a list of additional national LGBTQ advocacy and support 

organizations, refer to Information Gateway at https://www.

childwelfare.gov/organizations/?CWIGFunctionsaction=rols:main.

dspROL&rolType=Custom&RS_ID=146.

Possible Challenges Professionals Face 

While Working With LGBTQ Families

There are some unique challenges that may arise while 

working with prospective LGBTQ parents. Depending on 

the jurisdiction and work setting, these challenges could 

include laws, policies, or misperceptions regarding the 

LGBTQ community.

Laws

Foremost among the challenges you may face in working 

on behalf of LGBTQ families will be the laws and policies 

that govern your practice. While the June 2015 Supreme 

Court ruling in Obergefell v. Hodges53

Th

5 On June 26, 2015, the U.S. Supreme Court held in a 5–4 decision that “The 

Fourteenth Amendment requires a State to license a marriage between two 

people of the same sex and to recognize a marriage between two people of the 

same sex when their marriage was lawfully licensed and performed out-of-State.” 

e complete Court ruling can be read here http://www.supremecourt.gov/

opinions/14pdf/14-556_3204.pdf.

established marriage 
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equality in all 50 States, it did not specifically address 

foster care or adoption practices. Laws pertaining to child 

welfare and adoption are governed by each State, and they 

can vary widely between agencies. In approximately 19 

States, the District of Columbia, and the U.S. Virgin Islands, 

the use of gender-neutral language, including “spouses” 

or “married couples,” serves to allow adoption by samesex couples.64

6 California (by spouse or domestic partner), Colorado, Connecticut, Georgia, 

Idaho, Illinois (spouses and civil union partners), Louisiana, Maryland, Minnesota, 

Missouri, Nevada, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York (spouses and unmarried 

intimate partners), North Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Utah, and 

Vermont. In Utah, the State social services division is required to place a child in 

its custody with a man and woman married to each other unless that placement 

is contrary to the child’s best interests.

Regardless of whether an LGBTQ couple is 

married or in a civil union or domestic partnership, it is 

widely recommended that nonbiological and nonadoptive 

parents obtain an adoption (second parent or stepparent 

adoption included), even if the second parent is named 

on the child’s birth certificate, in order to provide the 

child with necessary legal protection. Because State laws 

are often vague on this issue, an individual social worker, 

attorney, agency, or judge may interpret them differently. 

For example, in some States, a joint adoption by a samesex couple may be approved in one county, but a social 

worker in a neighboring county must submit a home 

study listing the primary applicant and “other member of 

household.” 

As of January 2015, only Mississippi explicitly prohibited 

adoption by LGBTQ couples in its statutes. However, 

in March 2016, a U.S. District Court judge declared 

unconstitutional the State’s ban on adoption by same-sex 

couples, citing the Supreme Court’s 2015 marriage equality 

ruling in the historic case Obergefell v. Hodges. That 

said, the State’s statute still includes language prohibiting 

adoption by same-sex couples. 

Utah bars adoption by persons who are cohabiting, but 

not legally married; this language could be, and often 

is, interpreted to deny adoptions by same-sex couples. 

The statutory laws in most States are largely silent on the 

issue of adoption by gay and lesbian persons as single 

persons.75

7 Connecticut § 45a-726a, which allowed the commissioner of human 

services to consider the sexual orientation of the prospective adoptive parent, 

notwithstanding provisions in the State’s laws prohibiting discrimination based 

on sexual orientation, was repealed July 1, 2013. Florida § 63.042(3), which 

prohibited adoption by a gay or lesbian person, was deleted from the statute 

June 11, 2015.

See Information Gateway’s Who May Adopt, Be 

Adopted, or Place a Child for Adoption? Summary of State 

Laws at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubPDFs/parties.

pdf for more information. It is recommended that agencies 

review their State’s relevant laws and understand how they 

may affect prospective LGBTQ parents. The Human Rights 

Campaign also maintains a map where you can search State 

laws related to a variety of LGBTQ issues at 

http://www.hrc.org/state_maps. 

In the case of intercountry adoption, the process is becoming 

increasingly difficult and complicated for all families—

heterosexual, same-sex couples, and single adults—

considering it is the laws of other nations that determine who 

can and cannot adopt. For LGBTQ families, many countries 

have policies, cultural norms, and/or expectations that make 

it very difficult for same-sex couples and individuals to 

adopt internationally. The U.S. State Department maintains a 

database of written laws and policies for each country from 

which U.S. citizens are able to adopt. It is available at www.

adoption.state.gov/ countryinformation.html.

Policies

Agency policies should be explicit (written and enforced) 

or implicit (agency culture and expectations). When an 

agency has no policies that expressly prohibit discrimination 

on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity, there 

is a chance for members of the LGBTQ community to be 

disqualified or misled regarding the potential for placement. 

Inconsistent laws and policies can make it difficult to apply 

best practices in some situations. It is important that agency 

staff research the local and regional laws that may impact 

prospective LGBTQ families and to be an advocate for these 

families. Agency administrators and/or supervisors also 

may want to develop a referral list of experienced LGBTQcompetent family attorneys and seek out consultation as 

needed. Consult the following resources for help locating an 

LGBTQ-friendly attorney in your area:

 Lambda Legal’s Help Desk, 866.542.8336 or http://www.

lambdalegal.org/

 The National LGBTQ Bar Association website 

http://lgbtbar.org/

 Your local LGBTQ center or community organization 

 The American Bar Association’s referral site 

Findlegalhelp.org
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Personal Biases

Some professionals have personal bias, misinformation, 

or fears about working with the LGBTQ community. The 

Code of Ethics of the National Association of Social 

Workers outlines that a social worker has a responsibility 

to “be sensitive to cultural and ethnic diversity and [to] 

strive to end discrimination, oppression, poverty, and 

other forms of social injustice.” Read the entire code at 

https://www.socialworkers.org/pubs/code/code.asp. 

Child welfare and adoption agencies and professionals 

should be prepared for possible issues that may arise, 

both professionally and personally, while working with 

LGBTQ prospective parents. Professionals may need 

to examine any personal attitudes or fears to ensure 

their work is not negatively impacted and they are 

able to explore openly with each individual or couple 

their background, experience, and skills as it relates to 

caring for a child or youth. Some professionals working 

in the public sector may encounter peers who refuse to 

place children with LGBTQ families, even when a home 

study is approved and the family is considered a good 

placement opportunity. The following tips can be helpful 

in addressing some of the above-mentioned challenges:86

8 Adapted from Human Rights Campaign Foundation. (2009). Promising 

practices in adoption and foster care: A comprehensive guide to policies 

and practices that welcome affirm and support lesbian, gay, bisexual, 

and transgender foster and adoptive parents (3rd Ed). Retrieved from 

http://familybuilders.org/sites/default/files/pdf/HRCFoundation_

PromisingPracticeGuide_3rdEdition_Color.pdf.

 Research the local and regional laws that may impact 

your LGBTQ prospective parents.

 Develop a referral list of experienced LGBTQcompetent family attorneys in your jurisdiction and 

seek out consultation as needed.

 Develop a list of LGBTQ-friendly agencies outside 

of your State or region that can provide support and 

resources for families when their State of residence 

or local laws present challenges to their adoption 

process.

 Ensure that agency directors put this issue before 

their boards of trustees and are prepared to present 

evidence about the benefits of working with LGBTQ 

families.

 Become familiar with the local family or probate 

court having jurisdiction over adoption. The agency 

administration can engage the judge or his or her 

staff in discussions to determine how the court may 

treat cases of adoption of children by parents who are 

LGBTQ.

Tips for Representing LGBTQ Families 

as Potential Adoptive Parents

Private agencies may struggle with representing LGBTQ 

individuals or couples when working with birth families 

who are considering placement options. It is important to 

be aware of how to talk to other adults and to children at 

various stages about different kinds of families, including 

LGBTQ families. The following are suggestions for 

conducting these conversations:97

9 Adapted from Human Rights Campaign Foundation. (2009). Promising 

practices in adoption and foster care: A comprehensive guide to policies 

and practices that welcome affirm and support lesbian, gay, bisexual, 

and transgender foster and adoptive parents (3rd Ed). Retrieved from 

http://familybuilders.org/sites/default/files/pdf/HRCFoundation_

PromisingPracticeGuide_3rdEdition_Color.pdf.

 Be prepared to share some key talking points or 

handouts about the positive findings from research on 

children raised by LGBTQ parents and to address any 

fears or concerns by offering factual information about 

LGBTQ parents.

 When meeting birth families for the first time, inform 

them that you work with diverse resource/adoptive 

families and include examples such as two-dad or 

two-mom families. Do not make assumptions about 

what families they will consider. 

 Provide opportunities within your agency or 

community for LGBTQ adoptive parents to participate 

in orientations, parent panels, and training/licensing 

classes. When people get to know LGBTQ parents, 

many of their initial fears are alleviated.

 When representing family home studies to expectant 

families, include LGBTQ families. Do not highlight or 

point out the sexual orientation or marital status from 

the very beginning of the introduction, but focus on 

those things that will be relevant to what the birth 

family has expressed an interest in—for example, that 

the couple lives in the city, has pets, or that they are 

teachers or athletes.
Working With Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning (LGBTQ) Families in Foster Care https://www.childwelfare.gov

and Adoption

9

This material may be freely reproduced and distributed. However, when doing so, please credit Child Welfare Information Gateway. 

This publication is available online at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f-profbulletin/.

 When talking to children or youth, explain that there 

are many kinds of families who are interested in 

adopting, using photos and stories about the families 

rather than using terms such as gay, lesbian, or 

transgender when first introducing the families.

 With younger children, point out the family structure 

(“this family has two dads,” or “this family has one 

mom, a dog, and a cat”) rather than discussing sexual 

orientation. Younger children do not have a formulated 

concept of sexuality or sexual orientation; rather, they 

are interested in who will be in their family.

 With older children who have a more evolved 

understanding of sexuality and romantic/physical 

relationships, be very direct and honest when 

presenting a same-sex couple or a single applicant 

who has self-identified as LGBTQ. It is better to know 

up front if there are negative feelings or biases about 

gay or lesbian people.

 In most cases, children and youth do not have rigid 

ideas or beliefs about sexual orientation and are open 

to different families. However, if and when an older 

youth is resistant to the idea of being placed with an 

LGBTQ individual or same-sex couple, be prepared 

to engage the youth in a discussion about his or her 

concerns, keeping in mind that the youth may hold 

views based on myths, stereotypes, or misinformation. 

It is important, however, to respect the youth’s 

position, even if you disagree, which may ultimately 

necessitate the need to identify other families to 

ensure the best placement choice for that particular 

child or youth.

Supporting Transgender Parents

Potential biases exist when working with people who do 

not conform to a traditional view of gender roles and 

behavior. Some of the more extreme examples of bias 

and discrimination are evident when working with clients 

who identify as transgender, particularly those individuals 

who have experienced a gender transition. While the 

transgender community is relatively small, and most 

adoption professionals have not worked with applicants 

who self-identify as transgender, understanding the 

transgender experience is important in order to avoid 

bias.

 Be sure you understand the basic concepts “gender 

identity,” “gender expression,” and “transgender” 

explained earlier in this bulletin. The following image 

from the Office of Equity, Diversity & International 

Affairs at the University of West Florida may also be 

helpful. 

Credit: University of West Florida, Office of Equity, Diversity 

& International Affairs. Retrieved from http://uwf.edu/offices/

university-college/departments/equity-diversity/lgbt-initiatives/

definitions-terminology/.

 Address people by their correct names and pronouns. 

If you are not sure, it is better to ask than to assume.

 Understand the specific experiences of individuals who 

undergo a gender transition with medical/hormonal 

and/or surgical support. 

 Contact your local LGBTQ community center or local 

LGBTQ advocacy organization to request resources 

related to the transgender community. If possible, 

request a transgender person as a guest speaker at a 

professional in-service training.
Working With Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning (LGBTQ) Families in Foster Care https://www.childwelfare.gov

and Adoption

10

This material may be freely reproduced and distributed. However, when doing so, please credit Child Welfare Information Gateway. 

This publication is available online at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f-profbulletin/.

The Basics of Creating a Welcoming 

Agency

When prospective LGBTQ parents begin their journey 

toward fostering or adoption, they often look for an 

agency that sends a clear message of affirmation and 

respect. There are a number of assessment tools available 

to help raise awareness and sensitivity when working with 

the LGBTQ community. The National Center for Cultural 

Competence at Georgetown University Center for Child 

and Human Development created the Self-Assessment 

Checklist for Personnel Providing Services and Supports 

to LGBTQ Youth and Their Families, which is available 

at http://nccc.georgetown.edu/documents/Final%20

LGBTQ%20Checklist.pdf. Additionally, the Human Rights 

Campaign offers agencies an LGBTQ cultural competency 

self-assessment with 10 policy and practice benchmarks. 

For more information on this resource, visit http://www.

hrc.org/resources/entry/benchmarks-of-lgbt-culturalcompetency. Finally, AdoptUSKids has a resource titled 

Moving Toward Cultural Competence: Key Considerations 

to Explore, which provides a useful framework for building 

cultural competence in your agency. This resource 

is available at http://www.adoptuskids.org/_assets/

files/NRCRRFAP/resources/moving-toward-culturalcompetence.pdf.

In addition, agencies that want to convey a welcoming 

philosophy may want to consider the following:101

10 Adapted from Human Rights Campaign Foundation. (2009). Promising 

practices in adoption and foster care: A comprehensive guide to policies 

and practices that welcome affirm and support lesbian, gay, bisexual, 

and transgender foster and adoptive parents (3rd Ed). Retrieved from 

http://familybuilders.org/sites/default/files/pdf/HRCFoundation_

PromisingPracticeGuide_3rdEdition_Color.pdf.

 Have an explicit nondiscrimination statement that 

includes sexual orientation, gender identity, and 

marital status.

 Use inclusive language in your written materials, 

on your website, and in your general external 

communications. For example, forms should say 

“applicant 1/applicant 2,” rather than “mother/father.” 

All images, language, materials, and events should 

include and affirm all families. 

 Invite LGBTQ parents from your local community to 

serve on an advisory board, participate in a focus 

group, or be a guest speaker at staff meetings.

 Talk about your inclusive policies at orientation/training 

meetings and use examples of families that convey the 

wide range of diversity within your client base.

 Include photos of two-mom and two-dad families, 

as well as a range of single-parent families in your 

marketing materials and on your website. 

 If you are an agency leader, ensure that training for 

all staff includes cultural competence or request 

that your supervisor/administrator provide training 

opportunities.

 When possible, hire an LGBTQ staff person or those 

who identify themselves as LGBTQ allies. Make clear 

to all prospective employees that you have a policy 

of welcoming LGBTQ adoptive parents and be sure 

your team is fully supportive and compliant with these 

policies.

 Supervisors can use the supervisory relationship to 

promote positive, culturally competent language and 

models as well as ensure workers receive appropriate 

resources and training

 Work in partnership with LGBTQ institutions, advocacy 

organizations, and community groups to maximize 

your ability to connect with LGBTQ families. 

Conclusion

Cultural competence has long been understood as a pillar 

of best practice in the field of child welfare. According to 

the Child Welfare League of America (http://www.cwla.

org/), “cultural competence is the ability of individuals 

and systems to respond respectfully and effectively to 

people of all cultures, classes, races, ethnic backgrounds, 

sexual orientations, and faiths or religions in a manner that 

recognizes, affirms, and values the worth of individuals, 

families, tribes, and communities, and protects and 

preserves the dignity of each.” A person’s sexual 

orientation or gender identity should not, in itself, be the 

focus of this work, but it rather should be considered as 

one part of a much larger story than any one prospective 

foster or adoptive family has to tell. Being open to 

working with same-sex couples and LGBTQ individuals as 

resource families only stands to help more children and 

youth find permanent, loving homes and improve their 

well-being.
Working With Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning (LGBTQ) Families in Foster Care https://www.childwelfare.gov

and Adoption

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Suggested Citation: 

Child Welfare Information Gateway. (2016). Working with 

lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning 

(LGBTQ) families in foster care and adoption. Washington, 

DC: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 

Children’s Bureau.

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services 

Administration for Children and Families 

Administration on Children, Youth and Families 

Children’s Bureau