VERBAL ATEMI 

A TECHNIQUE FOR 

CREATIVE DISRUPTION 

Presented by Stephen Kotev

www.StephenKotev.com

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018
Conflict Resolution Consultant 

offering mediation, 

negotiation, leadership & 

conflict coaching, facilitation 

services, training 

and somatic education

Chair of the ACR 

Taskforce on 

Safety in ADR

Certified instructor of 

Being in Movement® 

Embodied Peacemaking

Black Belt in Aikido and 

Purple Belt in Brazilian 

Jiu Jitsu

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018
OBJECTIVES:

 To provide you with a different way of 

looking at confrontation/engagement

 To talk about an untapped resource in the 

Japanese martial art of Aikido

To provide powerful examples of creative 

disruptions of high-conflict situations

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018
GETTING TO KNOW YOU

• A show of hands - how long have you been 

practicing/in the field?

• What would you like to learn today/what 

caught your attention?

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2017
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU 

DID SOMETHING TOTALLY 

UNEXPECTED DURING YOUR 

ADR/MEDIATION SESSION?

• Take a moment to reflect

• Find a partner and share what happened

– If you are participating remotely – email or text a friend 

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018
Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018, image courtesy of Aikiweb
Morihei Ueshiba

Founder of Aikido

Image courtesy of Aikido Journal

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A deeply spiritual man, 

Ueshiba strove to meld his 

spirituality with his martial 

practice. 

He created Aikido as a way 

to transform the notion of 

warrior: from that of 

destroyer to protector.

Image courtesy of Aikiweb.com

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A SHORT CLIP OF AIKIDO 

IN ACTION

Image courtesy of Aikiweb.com

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018
Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018

• Video Clip here
Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2017, image courtesy of Aikiweb

Aikido is an untapped philosophical 

resource for ADR Professionals
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SHARED CONCEPTS AND 

PRINCIPLES BETWEEN AIKIDO & CR:

• Centered and upright posture

• Blending

• Relaxed response to attacks

• An ethical choice not to do additional 

harm to the Attacker

• Connection

• Irimi

• Atemi 
ATEMI

A strike meant to 

unbalance and 

surprise 

NOT injure the 

attacker

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“YOUR SHOES UNTIED”

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018
Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018
VERBAL ATEMI

A creative technique used to 

disrupt a pattern of intent 

through unexpected and 

unorthodox means

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018
STORIES OF VERBAL ATEMI:

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018

+

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CAPITOL HILL, WASHINGTON DC

JUNE 16, 2007

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018, Image Wikimedia Commons
Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018

Video clip here
“You have to 

hit them 

with love.” 

Clyde 

Takeguchi

Sensei

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“Moving through 

the 

gaps in your 

mind.” 

Tetsuzan Kuroda 

Sensei

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Video clip here
OPENING 

PRESENTS

BY

DAVID CLARK

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018, Image Wikimedia Commons
THE HOMICIDAL PATIENT IN THE 

ELEVATOR

BY 

MILTON H. ERICKSON

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A SOFT ANSWER

BY

TERRY DOBSON
QUESTIONS?

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018
VERBAL ATEMI 

A TECHNIQUE FOR 

CREATIVE DISRUPTION 

Presented by Stephen Kotev

Stephen@StephenKotev.com

Stephen Kotev All Rights Reserved 2018