Welcome
MASTERING

RESPECTFUL

CONFRONTATION

A Guide to Personal Freedom and Empowered, Collaborative 

Engagement
Goals

• Learn about empowered, collaborative 

engagement. 

• Reframe views on confrontation, assertiveness, 

and true power. 

• Achieve greater self-confidence, personal 

freedom, fulfillment, and peaceful interactions 

with others.
Power and Leadership in the 

21st century
My truth ≠ The truth
“We will never end world war and strife 

until each one of us look at our own 

personal, psychological violence and take 

steps to eliminate it.”

Peace Pilgrim
“Human beings have discretionary energy, and they 

would give it to you if you treat them with dignity 

and respect.”

-Paul O’Neill, former Treasury Secretary of US under 

George W. Bush
When one moves into their vulnerability, 

then their true power is revealed.
The electromagnetic field of the heart
Respectful Confrontation

• The practice of developing the respectful self

• The practice of respectful engagement 

• The practice of respectful offense 

• The practice of respectful defense
You may know me....

but you have no idea 

WHO I AM

True power = Brute force

Confrontation = Conflict

Assertiveness = Aggression
Brute force ≠ True power
4 Pillars of True Power

• Grounding

• Focus

• Strength

• Flexibility
Conflict ≠ Confrontation
Pronunciation: 'kän-"flikt Function: 

noun Etymology: Middle English, to strike 

together, from com- + fligere to strike -- more 

at PROFLIGATE 1 : FIGHT, BATTLE, WAR 2 a :

competitive or opposing action of 

incompatibles : antagonistic state or action (as 

of divergent ideas, interests, or persons) b :

mental struggle resulting from incompatible or 

opposing needs, drives, wishes, or external or 

internal demands; see DISCORD

Conflict 
Confront

con·front Pronunciation: k&n-'fr&nt Function: 

transitive verb Etymology: from Latin com- + 

front-, frons forehead, front 1 : to face 

especially in challenge : OPPOSE 2 a : to cause 

to meet : bring face-to-face <confront a reader 

with statistics> b : to meet face-to-face : 

ENCOUNTER
Respectful Confrontation Definition

CONFLICT: an encounter that leads to the 

further separation of individuals, the 

breakdown of relationship, and the 

disempowerment of the other.
Respectful Confrontation 

Definition

CONFRONTATION: an encounter that leads to 

individuals coming closer together, deepening 

of relationship, and the empowerment of all 

involved.
“If you fear making anyone mad, then you 

ultimately probe for the lowest common 

denominator of human achievement.”

- Former US President, Jimmy Carter
Aggression ≠ Assertiveness
Assertive

Pronunciation:\ə-ˈsər-tiv, a-\ Function:adjective,

Date: circa 1619

1 : disposed to or characterized by bold or 

confident assertion <an assertive leader>

2 : having a strong or distinctive flavor or aroma 

<assertive wines>
Aggressive

ag·gres·sive

Pronunciation:\ə-ˈgre-siv\ Function: Adjective, Date:1824

1 a: tending toward or exhibiting aggression <aggressive behavior> b: marked 

by combative readiness <an aggressive fighter>

2 a: marked by obtrusive energy b: marked by driving forceful energy or 

initiative : enterprising <an aggressive salesman>

3: strong or emphatic in effect or intent <aggressive colors> <aggressive

flavors>

4: growing, developing, or spreading rapidly <aggressive bone tumors>
Respectful Confrontation Definition

AGGRESSION: any behavior, action, remark, 

gesture, or facial expression that impacts 

another with the goal to disempower and/or 

is received by the other in a harmful, 

threatening way.
Respectful Confrontation Definition

ASSERTIVENESS: any behavior, action, remark, 

gesture, or facial expression that impacts 

another with the goal to empower and/or is 

received by the other in a positive way.
3 F’s

• Fight

• Flight

• Freeze
“Courage is what it takes to stand up and 

speak. Courage is what it takes to sit 

down and listen.”

- Winston Churchill 
“With realization of one’s potential, and 

self-confidence in one’s ability, one can 

build a better world.”

- His Holiness the Dalai Lama
RESPECTFUL CONFRONTATION

Personal Freedom – Collaborative Engagement

http://www.respectfulconfrontation.com/
“We have to face the fact that either all of us 

are going to die together or we are going to 

learn to live together, and if we are to live 

together we have to talk.”

Eleanor Roosevelt
“Non-violence, which is the quality of the 

heart, cannot come by an appeal to the brain.”

Mahatma Gandhi
“Sweet are the uses of adversity which, like the 

toad, ugly and venomous, wears yet a precious 

jewel in his head.”

William Shakespeare