Children’s Bureau/ACYF/ACF/HHS

800.394.3366 | Email: info@childwelfare.gov | https://www.childwelfare.gov

WHAT’S INSIDE

The decision to search

Conducting a search

Hiring a professional 

searcher

International searching

Social media and 

searching

Reunion issues

Conclusion

Searching for Birth Relatives

FACTSHEET 

FOR FAMILIES

May 2018

Methods for searching for birth relatives or an adopted 

child have changed dramatically in recent years. 

Previously, many adoptions were closed, meaning 

no contact occurred between the birth and adoptive 

families, and no identifying information was made 

available to the adoptive family or the person who was 

adopted. A social shift in the 1980s and 1990s toward 

open adoptions led to various levels of connection 

between the adoption triad (adoptee, birth parents, and 

adoptive parents), as well as extended family members 

and other important connections—sometimes called the 

adoption constellation. Today, adoption exists along a 

continuum from shared information to regular contact 

between the child and the birth parents or other family 

members. 

Social networking can be a useful tool for anyone on the 

adoption continuum to identify, search for, or reunite 

with birth relatives. Youth who were adopted are also 

using social networking sites to find their birth parents 

or relatives and to establish relationships with birth 

families. 

This factsheet provides an overview of the process 

of searching for birth relatives, including activities 

common to birth relative searches, information access, 

and resources for conducting a search and/or reunion, 

if desired. This information may be useful whether you 

are an adult searching for your birth parents, siblings, 

or other birth relatives; a birth parent searching for a 

child who was placed for adoption; or an adoptive parent 

searching for your child’s birth family.
Searching for Birth Relatives https://www.childwelfare.gov

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This publication is available online at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f-search/

The Decision to Search

Questions about personal identity may drive people 

to search for birth relatives. Searching also may help to 

satisfy curiosity about birth families and genetic and 

medical histories. Common reasons why people search for 

birth relatives include the following:

 General family information. Those who decide to 

search may want to know the names of their birth 

relatives and where they live. They may also want to 

know whether they have birth siblings and what they 

are like. 

 Family traits and personalities. Many people who 

were adopted and birth parents want to know how 

their birth relatives look and act and whether they 

share similar traits.

 Medical history information. Genetic information can 

be crucial for safeguarding one’s health and the health 

of biological children.1

 Reason for the adoption. People who have been 

adopted often feel a need to know why they were 

placed for adoption, why the rights of the birth parent 

were terminated, and how that decision was made. 

Birth parents may want the opportunity to explain the 

circumstances to their child.

 Connections for your children. Some adoptive 

parents wish to find and reunite with their child’s birth 

family to preserve these connections for their children 

until they are old enough to maintain a relationship 

on their own. Adoptive parents may also contact birth 

relatives to help their children with specific issues of 

grief and loss.

 Birth parent reassurance. Birth parents may search 

for their children out of concern over whether they are 

safe and well cared for. 

Conducting a Search

No one is fully prepared for what they may find when 

beginning the search for a birth relative. Some may have 

more awareness than others about the person for whom 

they are searching and the relative’s feelings about a 

1 The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services launched the Surgeon 

General’s Family Health History Initiative to encourage all Americans to learn 

more about their family health history at https://www.hhs.gov/familyhistory. 

possible reunion. You may use a variety of ways to make 

possible connections, including investigating public 

documents, hiring professionals, conducting Internet 

searches, and using social media. 

Activities common to birth relative searches include: 

 Preparing emotionally

 Assembling information and documents 

 Researching relevant State laws 

 Filing court petitions

 Registering with reunion registries

Preparing emotionally. Adoption professionals strongly 

recommend emotional preparation for both people who 

were adopted and birth relatives before searching for 

birth family members. Preparing may include reading 

about search and reunion experiences and talking with 

others who are going through or have experienced the 

search process. Support groups for all members of the 

adoption triad can help by providing emotional support 

and sharing practical information.

For more information about emotional preparation and 

to hear about experiences of others who have searched 

for birth relatives, including information about searching 

internationally and preparing for a reunion, watch “Search 

and Reunion in Domestic and International Adoption,” 

a webinar produced by the Center for Adoption 

Support and Education (C.A.S.E.), at https://youtu.be/

cwmuY6-yjP0. 

Seeking and accepting emotional support from family 

and friends also can be helpful. If you are adopted, you 

may be reluctant to share your decision to search for fear 

of hurting your parents’ feelings. If you’re an adoptive 

parent, you might be reassured to know that the decision 

Access State-specific Birth Family and Adoptee 

Search Support Groups using Child Welfare 

Information Gateway’s National Foster Care & 

Adoption Directory at https://www.childwelfare.

gov/nfcad.
Searching for Birth Relatives https://www.childwelfare.gov

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This publication is available online at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f-search/.

to search is generally not about you or your family but 

about your child’s need to understand and know where 

she came from. Open communication from both sides 

about goals is important.

Teens who were adopted and are searching for birth 

relatives may need emotional support from their adoptive 

parents through active involvement in the search, help 

with setting realistic expectations about birth families, 

and preparing for the range of possibilities they may 

encounter, including reactions of birth family members.

If you would like support beyond family and friends, such 

as help from a professional, see Information Gateway’s 

Finding and Working With Adoption-Competent 

Therapists at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/ftherapist/, and access the C.A.S.E. Directory of Adoption 

Competent Professionals at http://adoptionsupport.org/

member-types/adoption-competent-professionals/. 

Assemblinginformationanddocuments. Gathering 

known and easily obtainable information may involve 

speaking with adoptive parents to find information on the 

adoption agency they used or talking to an attorney or 

facilitator involved in the adoption. Compiling information 

also means pulling together readily available documents, 

such as the amended birth certificate, hospital records, 

and other identifying and nonidentifying information. 

Many online databases and websites are available to 

help you locate important documents. Some of these 

resources are free of charge, and some are not. For 

more on gathering information and documents, see 

Information Gateway’s Obtaining Birth and/or Adoption 

Records webpage at https://www.childwelfare.gov/topics/

adoption/search/records.

Filing a court petition. If you were adopted, you 

may petition the court to open sealed adoption 

records. Whether this is successful may depend on 

the State, the judge, the reason given for the request, 

and other factors. Petitioning the court does not 

require an attorney’s services, although attorneys 

may be helpful. Depending on State laws, the judge 

may agree to release only nonidentifying information 

(which should be available by asking any agency), 

agree to release a summary of information, or deny 

the petition completely. In some States, the judge 

may appoint an intermediary, such as the original 

adoption agency or a professional searcher, to locate 

the birth parents and determine whether they want 

to release information or be reunited. 

Researching relevant State laws. Laws related to 

adoption and access to adoption records often vary by 

State. It’s important to be informed about your State’s 

adoption laws. Below are resources from Information 

Gateway to help you find State-specific information. 

 Access to Adoption Records outlines State laws related 

to accessing information from adoption records by 

adoptive parents and adult adoptees: https://www.

childwelfare.gov/topics/systemwide/laws-policies/

statutes/infoaccessap

 Providing Adoptive Parents With Information About 

Adoptees and Their Birth Families outlines State laws 

pertaining to information that adoptive parents are 

provided about the background of the child they 

plan to adopt: https://www.childwelfare.gov/topics/

systemwide/laws-policies/statutes/collection

 The State Statutes Search database provides Statespecific information about a range of adoption-related 

topics, including consent to adoption, the rights of 

unmarried fathers, and more: https://www.childwelfare.

gov/topics/systemwide/laws-policies/state

An amended birth certificate, which is issued after 

an adoption is finalized, lists the names of the 

adoptive parents as if the child had been born to 

them. Most people who were adopted will not 

have their original birth certificate but will have 

an amended birth certificate. About half of all 

States allow adults to have access to their original 

birth certificates, which provide the names of 

their birth parent(s). In other States, an original 

birth certificate may be obtained through a 

court petition. More information about adoption 

records is available in the Researching Relevant 

State Laws section of this publication.
Searching for Birth Relatives https://www.childwelfare.gov

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This material may be freely reproduced and distributed. However, when doing so, please credit Child Welfare Information Gateway. 

This publication is available online at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f-search/.

For a general overview of the court system, including 

definitions of key court terms, see Information Gateway’s 

Understanding Child Welfare and the Courts at https://

www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/factsheets/cwandcourts. 

Registering with reunion registries. Many States, as 

well as private organizations, offer reunion registries for 

people who were adopted and birth parents. “Passive” 

registries (also known as mutual consent registries) do not 

initiate a search or actively search for the other party. Both 

the person who was adopted and the birth relative must 

register independently on the same passive registry for a 

match to be made, indicating they are searching for each 

other. When both parties register on the same passive 

registry, registry officials share their information and 

help to arrange contact. “Active” registries, managed by 

private search and support groups, actively search for the 

birth relative for a fee.

 To search for State Reunion Registries/Confidential 

Intermediary Services, see Information Gateway’s 

National Foster Care & Adoption Directory at https://

childwelfare.gov/nfcad. 

 The largest passive registry is the International 

Soundex Reunion Registry at http://www.isrr.org. This 

free service is open to adoptee adults over 18 years of 

age, birth parents, and adoptive parents of children 

under 18 years of age. 

 Responsible Father Registries, also called Putative 

Father Registries, are passive registries that exist 

in as many as 32 States. For more information 

on Responsible Father Registries, see http://

www.adoptionattorneys.org/aaaa/birth-parents/

putative-father-registry. For a list of State Putative 

Father Registries, including addresses and contact 

information, see https://www.courts.state.nh.us/

probate/registrylist.pdf. 

Hiring a Professional Searcher

Professional searchers include certified independent 

search consultants, licensed private investigators who 

may or may not have adoption experience, nonprofit 

organizations that train in adoption searching, and 

experts in a field who may or may not have a certification 

(e.g., confidential intermediaries). If you choose to hire a 

professional searcher, you should research the reputation 

of the searcher or company before obtaining their 

services. 

Support groups and online forums can be a ready source 

of information about professional searchers. Reputable 

professional searchers will always respect your pacing and 

boundaries. These professionals will not move beyond 

search into reunion unless you request this step.

“Search Angels” (https://www.searchangels.org), a service 

available in all States, consists of individuals who have 

experience conducting searches for birth relatives and will 

conduct adoption searches free of charge. Search angels 

are not private detectives or paid professional searchers. 

They can also be found on adoption search blogs, social 

networking sites, search support groups, and other online 

forums. 

Additional resources to aid in the search 

process are provided on Information Gateway’s 

Searching for Birth Relatives webpage at https://

www.childwelfare.gov/topics/adoption/search/

searching. 

For help finding a professional searcher, click on 

Birth Family and Adoptee Search Support Groups 

in Information Gateway’s National Foster Care & 

Adoption Directory at https://www.childwelfare.

gov/nfcad.
Searching for Birth Relatives https://www.childwelfare.gov

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This material may be freely reproduced and distributed. However, when doing so, please credit Child Welfare Information Gateway. 

This publication is available online at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f-search/.

International Searching

The child-placing agency may be the best beginning 

point for an international search. The U.S. agency that 

initiated your adoption may be able to share the name 

and location of the agency or orphanage abroad and, 

perhaps, the names of caregivers, attorneys, or others 

involved in your adoption. It also may offer medical 

history, biographical information on parents, and 

circumstances of the adoption. Some agencies provide 

international search services in partnership with overseas 

child-placing agencies. After communicating with the 

agency, cultivating a relationship with a contact in the 

birth country is often the next step. Building relationships 

can take time but can be the best link to finding crucial 

pieces of information for a successful search.

The following resources provide useful services for 

international searchers:

 U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services may provide 

copies of immigration records if you submit a Freedom 

of Information Act request (https://www.uscis.gov/

about-us/freedom-information-and-privacy-act-foia/

uscis-freedom-information-act-and-privacy-act).

 International Social Service offers a range of social 

work services, including help if you were adopted 

and wish to find your birth family abroad (http://www.

iss-usa.org).

 If you wish to visit your birth country and experience 

your birth culture, the National Foster Care & Adoption 

Directory lists groups that offer homeland tours 

(https://www.childwelfare.gov/nfcad).

Social Media and Searching

The wide use of social networks such as Facebook, 

LinkedIn, Twitter, MyLife, Classmates.com, and Instagram 

as well as commercial genealogy and DNA testing sites 

may help you find information about birth relatives. This 

section addresses the benefits and considerations of 

using social media when searching.2

Benefits of Social Media in Search and 

Reunion

Social networking sites and other forms of social media 

can be powerful tools to bring people together. Using 

social media for search and reunion is beneficial in a 

variety of ways:

 Ease and efficiency. It is possible to find birth relatives 

quickly. Sometimes searching social networking 

sites can lead to a successful connection when other 

methods have failed. Because many platforms allow 

access to another person’s network of connections, 

social media also makes it possible, depending on 

privacy settings, to connect with extended birth 

relatives.

 Social gatherings. Certain social networks allow for 

the creation of events and sending invitations for 

scheduling reunions or meetups with family members.

 Anonymous approach. Some people prefer the 

distance that searching online provides. It can feel less 

personal than a phone call or face-to-face visit. Using 

social media, you can often search anonymously and 

learn about your birth family while maintaining your 

privacy.

 Online community. Social media and online forums 

provide opportunities to engage with other searchers 

to learn more, find support for a search, ask questions, 

and discuss with others your interest in searching.

 Self-empowerment. The ease and efficiency of using 

the Internet and social media allow you to be proactive 

2 The considerations and tips provided in this factsheet are designed for 

adults (age 18 and older) who are searching for other adults. Considerations 

for adoptive parents of children under 18 are reviewed extensively in Facing 

Up to Facebook: A Survival Guide for Adoptive Families by Eileen Fursland 

(2013). Birth parents are encouraged to discuss the implications of using social 

networking sites to search for and reunite with a child who is under 18 with 

a social worker, counselor, or other professional before proceeding with a 

search.

Detailed information about intercountry adoption, 

including the name and contact details of specific 

countries’ adoption authorities, is provided on the 

U.S. State Department’s webpage on intercountry 

adoption at http://adoption.state.gov.
Searching for Birth Relatives https://www.childwelfare.gov

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This publication is available online at https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f-search/.

and conduct the search at your own pace, which can 

create a feeling of self-empowerment.

Considerations for Using Social Media for 

Searching

Although social media sites provide tools to search for 

birth relatives, it is important to consider the implications 

and possible risks of using these tools:

 Preparing for contact. Because search and contact 

with birth relatives can take place quickly, you may lose 

opportunities for pacing, self-reflection, conversations 

with friends and family, or thinking through the 

consequences of reconnecting with relatives. Plan 

for gradual communication with birth relatives to 

allow both parties time to develop a relationship and 

prepare for contact, if desired.

 Making contact. Reaching out through social media 

can lead to ongoing communication or in-person 

meetings with birth relatives, but contact can also be 

complicated or distressing. Family members may not 

want to be found, and contact does not always lead to 

immediate acceptance, love, or a relationship. 

 Maintaining privacy. Social media sites offer a 

variety of privacy settings, but you can’t assume that 

anything posted on social media is private. Frequently 

changing default privacy settings make maintaining 

privacy increasingly difficult. These default settings 

could allow any member of the public to view some or 

all information from your account. Also, once posted, 

information can be forwarded or shared with others.

 Staying safe online. As with any online activity, keep 

safety in mind. People are not always honest on the 

Internet. Several resources for learning about staying 

safe online include:

○ Facebook Security Best Practices: For more 

information on protecting your information on 

Facebook and reporting safety concerns (https://

www.facebook.com/facebookmedia/best-practices/

security)

○ Online OnGuard: For tips from the Federal 

Trade Commission on keeping your devices and 

information safe (https://www.consumer.ftc.gov/

features/feature-0038-onguardonline)

○ Staying Safe on Social Networking Sites: For tips 

from the United States Computer Emergency 

Readiness Team on protecting yourself online 

(https://www.us-cert.gov/ncas/tips/ST06-003)

 Posting pictures. Before posting photos on the 

Internet, educate yourself about location tagging. 

Some photos taken with smartphones may be 

embedded with a tag that can provide GPS 

information, revealing your location. (Learn how to 

manage location services at http://download.cnet.com/

blog/download-blog/location-services-101/.)

Reunion Issues

Not all searches will end in a reunion between the 

searcher and the birth relative. Below are some 

considerations to keep in mind when attempting a 

reunion.

Difference between search and reunion. People often 

assume that birth family searches end in a reunion. In fact, 

ambivalence about a possible reunion has sometimes 

deterred people from searching. All searches may not be 

successful, and birth relatives or those who were adopted 

may not always be interested in connecting. Everyone has 

a right to their own boundaries and to decline if they do 

not want to have a relationship or even a reunion. Many 

adoption professionals believe it is a basic human right 

to search and learn about oneself. The reunion, however, 

requires mutual consent from both parties. 

Emotional preparation. If you are adopted, you may 

have concerns and complex feelings related to meeting 

your birth parent(s) or other birth relatives for the first 

time. You may fear being rejected, feel anger toward 

your birth parents, resent other siblings, worry about 

your adoptive parents’ reaction, and/or experience 

confusion about painful feelings from the past. Reunion 

can be emotional for birth parents as well, potentially 

tapping into strong feelings of separation, guilt, and loss, 

in addition to confronting issues that may have been 

long-buried or kept secret from spouses or other family 

members. Adoptive parents also may have reservations 

about their child reuniting with his or her birth parents. 

Preparation will help you think through your expectations 
U.S. Department of Health and Human Services 

Administration for Children and Families 

Administration on Children, Youth and Families 

Children’s Bureau

Searching for Birth Relatives https://www.childwelfare.gov

and prepare for a range of potential outcomes specific to 

your situation.

Communication. For a successful reunion to occur, 

both parties should set and respect boundaries and 

approach the situation with empathy for the other 

person(s) involved. You may feel apprehensive about 

communicating with your birth family member or 

biological child for the first time, which can raise issues 

if the two of you have different expectations for the 

exchange of information. It is important to manage 

expectations and respect boundaries regarding what 

information the other person does or does not want to 

hear or share. 

Conclusion

Increased openness in adoption and the prevalence of 

social media make it easier than ever to locate family 

members. This ease comes with new considerations for 

how to protect your privacy and the privacy of your birth 

relatives, and how to prepare for contact or a possible 

reunion. Still, each search is guided by a unique set of 

circumstances. For those who are interested in making 

contact with a birth relative, the reunion experience 

may turn out differently than expected. Many people 

who were adopted and birth parents have conducted 

successful searches and built meaningful relationships 

with their new-found relatives.

Suggested Citation: 

Child Welfare Information Gateway. (2018). Searching 

for birth relatives. Washington, DC: U.S. Department of 

Health and Human Services, Children’s Bureau