Navigating

THE Teen Years

A Parent’s Handbook for 

Raising Healthy Teens
Dear Parent,

Navigating the teen years can be formidable. But research 

shows that kids who learn from their parents about the 

dangers of underage drinking, illicit drugs, tobacco use, 

dangerous driving and other risky behaviors are less 

likely to engage in them.

This booklet provides the information and expert advice you 

need to help guide your teen to a healthy life. From 

setting expectations and rules to monitoring your teen, 

to being a good role model, the advice is simple and easy 

to do, with suggestions for actions to take daily, weekly 

or monthly. Whether you are a mom or dad, single or 

married, grandparent or other caregiver, this handbook 

provides tips and advice that you can use.

The nation’s pediatricians thank you for taking the time 

to focus on your teen’s healthy growth and positive 

future. It’s an investment you’ll never regret.

Sincerely,
I

f you have a teenager in your life, 

you’ve probably done your share of 

worrying about the potential risks 

out there. Alcohol, tobacco or illicit drug 

use. Dangerous driving. Sexual activity. 

Maybe even the pressures of school, 

sports or fitting in.

You’ve probably also worried that you’re 

no longer the most influential force in 

your child’s life. Teens are facing a host 

of intense challenges and changes in 

their lives, and like to act as if they alone 

can deal with them. But the reality is that 

teens need (and secretly want) your help 

and guidance. In fact, now that you have 

a teenager, your job as a parent isn’t 

done, it’s just different. 

The good news is that most of today’s 

teens are thriving. Adolescents today are 

less likely to drink, smoke, do drugs, get 

pregnant, commit a violent crime or drop 

out of school compared to their parents’ 

generation. They volunteer more than ever 

before and are actively exploring their 

spirituality. They are more tolerant and 

more likely to have friends with different 

ethnic, religious and socio-economic 

backgrounds. And most teens would 

even say they have positive relationships 

with their parents, siblings and friends. In 

short, they are finding their way, but not 

without the involvement and presence of 

YOU, the parent. 

Surveys of teens show that they want 

and expect their parents to play a key 

role in their lives. They appreciate you. 

They listen. They remember your advice. 

Even when it seems like they’re not 

paying attention.

That said, the risks facing teenagers 

today are real. They’re also different 

for every teen, and they might even 

surprise you. Did you know that rural 

and suburban teens are more likely 

than urban youth to have problems with 

alcohol or illicit drugs? And, despite all 

the warnings about impaired driving, 

30 percent of students report that 

they’ve ridden one or more times in 

the last month with a driver who had 

been drinking. 

Remember when your children first 

learned to walk? They often searched 

for a table or mom’s leg to steady 

themselves. Perhaps they even panicked 

if they couldn’t find something to hold 

onto. You made sure they were protected 

from things that could hurt them if they 

fell. You stayed close enough to help if 

they lost their balance but gave them 

enough room to practice their newfound skill. It was probably a joy for you 

to see them grow in confidence as they 

went from crawling to walking, and from 

walking to running. 

A Word About 

Parenting Teens

1
Principle #1: 

Tune Into 

Your Teen

Adolescence is a lot like 

that. Your teens need you 

close by during this time 

of exploration or they will 

find something else to hold 

on to, just like they did 

when they were toddlers. 

They need your help to 

navigate the barriers. 

And they need you close 

enough to openly ask 

questions and talk about 

problems, but far enough 

away so they can begin 

making decisions for 

themselves.

Need more guidance? 

Experts have identified 

some practical parenting 

skills that can help 

prevent a wide range of 

risky behaviors among 

teens and lead to healthy, 

well-adjusted youth. 

What follows is a “nuts 

and bolts” summary of 

the experts’ findings. 

In this handbook, you 

will find everyday tips 

on how to stay involved 

with your teen as she 

or he becomes more 

independent. Whether 

you are single or married, 

a mom or dad, or a 

grandparent or other 

caregiver, this handbook 

is for you. 

Keep reading to learn 

how to put these simple 

principles into practice to 

raise a safe, healthy and 

happy teen.

The common thread among teens who do 

well academically and socially, and stay 

healthy and drug-free, is that they have 

close relationships with their parents. These 

teens report that their parents are interested 

in them, in what they do and in who they know. 

They also say their parents are curious about 

their lives and their ideas. They feel connected, 

because their parents listen to them and take 

time to find out what’s going on in their world.

This only makes sense. Teens who are close to 

their parents or a trusted adult caregiver have 

more at stake when it comes to decisions about 

risk-taking. At that moment of truth when they are 

confronted with a risky choice, they don’t want 

to disappoint their parents or betray their trust. 

They are also more open to their parents’ advice. 

In fact, if you are connected, supportive and 

responsive to your teen, it will be much easier 

for you to take on the tougher parts of parenting, 
such as setting rules and discipline. You 

can simply be a strict parent, but your 

teens won’t have lasting respect for your 

rules unless they believe that you also 

care for them.

Here are some ways to foster a close 

relationship with your teen:

• Spend time together regularly, doing 

things your teen enjoys.

• Talk openly and honestly.

• Use positive communication skills, 

especially when there is conflict. 

For example, think before you speak 

and acknowledge your teen’s 

point-of-view so he or she knows 

you are listening.

• Acknowledge the positive qualities 

and behaviors of your teenager.

It’s true that sometimes staying connected 

is easier said than done. How can you 

get through when your teen is resentful or 

argumentative? Remember that nearly all 

teens are working toward independence. 

They can’t develop their own minds unless 

they challenge things you and others 

have taught them. So they will often 

argue just for the sake of disagreeing. It’s 

their way of forming an identity. However, 

even when they are giving you a hard 

time, they are probably listening and 

remembering. So keep your messages 

brief, but don’t stop talking and reaching 

out. Understand them by observing and 

respect them by listening.

TIP: Take advantage of everyday 

times like driving your teen to school 

or watching TV together to engage 

with your teenager. Or set aside a 

regular dinner “date” to check in. Ask 

about interests and activities and find 

out what’s going on in your teen’s life.

3

“My daughter talks to me. I pretty much 

know everything that’s going on with her, 

in school and with her friends.”

– Mom, from minnesota
Tuning Into 

Your Teen:

Quick Self-Check

_____ Do you praise 

your teen for 

accomplishments, 

even the small 

ones?

_____ Do you spend time 

each day talking 

with your teenager?

_____ Do you regularly 

have meals with 

your teen and 

other family 

members?

_____ Are you familiar 

with your teen’s 

favorite interests 

and hobbies? 

_____ Do you know your 

teen’s friends?

“Rules are their safety net...

they like them! They want 

to know you have a boundary 

for them. It’s better if you 

tell them ‘no’ than ‘maybe.’”

– Dad, From Virginia

4 
Principle #2: 

Guide Your Teen

Teens are inexperienced. 

Expectations and rules provide 

support and structure for young 

people dealing with new situations and 

challenges. Expectations and rules are 

different, but both are essential and 

they work hand-in-hand. Expectations 

help you define the broad standards of 

behavior you expect from your teen. For 

example, you expect your teen to make 

responsible decisions. Rules bring your 

expectations to life, such as requiring 

your teen to be home at a certain hour. 

Rules and their consequences provide 

a concrete way to help your kids 

understand your expectations and 

learn self-control.

Communicating your expectations is an 

important first step. Your teen may have 

a good sense of your attitudes about 

alcohol and illicit drug use and other 

risk-taking, but if you haven’t clearly 

spelled out your expectations, you are 

missing an opportunity. You may feel 

like you’re stating the obvious, but teens 

don’t deal so well with “gray” areas. They 

need to know exactly where you stand. 

There are many upsides to making your 

expectations clear. Sitting down with 

your teen opens the door to an important 

conversation about risky behaviors. Clear, 

firm expectations about risk-taking define 

limits for your teen and help prepare him 

or her for responding to temptation or 

a risky choice. And by discussing your 

expectations, you are sending a clear 

message that your teen is accountable 

for his or her behavior.

A discussion about expectations also 

gives you a chance to hear from your 

teen. Many teens have a sense of “it 

can’t happen to me” and need help fully 

understanding how a risky decision 

could affect them. You can use the 

conversation to probe your teens’ thinking 

about risky choices and to encourage 

them to think more realistically about the 

likely consequences of their actions. 

While expectations are important, they 

may leave some room for interpretation. 

This is why rules about specific behaviors, 

actions and responsibilities help ensure 

there’s no confusion. 

What kinds of rules do you need? In 

addition to substance use and other 

risk-taking, you may want rules around 

curfew, unsupervised time, homework, 

chores, driving, cell phone, Internet and 

use of other media, such as movies, 

television and video games. 

When it comes to rules, you’ll get some 

push-back from your teen, but most kids 

expect their parents to set some limits. If 

your teen protests, be respectful, listen 

and explain your reasoning. Here are 

some other ideas to make rule-setting as 

painless as possible:

Setting Expectations & Rules

5
• Focus on setting rules for safety with 

an emphasis on providing guidance 

rather than using power and/or 

issuing punishment.

• Provide opportunities for give-andtake. Allow your teen to weigh in on 

some of the rules, but maintain the 

final say. 

• Be firm, but not overly restrictive 

or intrusive.

• Set some fixed “house rules” 

regarding health and safety first, 

and then negotiate others with your 

teen. Be flexible and willing to 

renegotiate rules as your teen shows 

more maturity and responsibility.

• Be specific when it comes to rules 

about substance use. Tell your 

teens they are not permitted to use 

tobacco, alcohol or illicit drugs.

• Don’t forget to address misuse of 

prescription and over-the-counter 

medications as well. Non-medical 

use of prescription drugs is now a 

popular category of drug use among 

teens. Tell your teen that taking 

these drugs without a prescription 

or a doctor’s approval can be a 

dangerous – and even deadly – 

decision.

Keep in mind that it’s important to 

communicate your expectations to other 

parents as well. Parents of your teen’s 

friends and other adults in your teen’s life 

can be key allies for you, and it’s good for 

them to know where you stand.

Finally, don’t forget to set clear 

consequences when you’re talking about 

rules. Consequences aren’t only 

for punishment. They keep teens alert 

and mindful about breaking rules, and 

help slow them down the next time 

they’re faced with a risky choice. 

Consequences also have a more practical 

purpose. They provide teens with a believable

excuse to give their peers when resisting 

drugs or other risky behaviors. 

Here’s some advice for setting 

consequences:

• Try to keep consequences supportive; 

make sure they are about teaching, 

not about retaliation. They should be 

logical and not excessively harsh.

• Consequences need to be practical 

for the parent. You must be able and 

willing to enforce them consistently 

if they are to be effective.

• Follow through. Many parents have 

trouble upholding consequences 

consistently, and their teens are 

often aware of it. 

• Use the power of praise to reinforce 

positive behavior. Look for 

opportunities to catch your teen 

being good. Praise your teen today 

as much as you did when he or she 

was a preschooler. 

• Set some rewards and special 

privileges for your teen for following 

the rules.

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TIP: Your teens will be more likely 

to accept and understand your rules if 

you take time to teach them about the 

values that are important to your family. 

For example, to talk about accountability, 

use real-life examples about people you 

know or stories in the news to reinforce 

the importance of taking responsibility 

for your actions.

Setting Expectations 

& Rules for Your Teen: 

Quick Self-Check

_____ Have you told your teens you 

expect them to avoid alcohol, 

tobacco, marijuana and other 

illicit drugs? 

_____ Have you discussed and set 

“house rules” with your teen?

_____ Have you defined specific 

consequences for breaking rules?

_____ Did you involve your teen in the 

rule-setting discussion?

7
Think about monitoring as plugging into 

the different areas of your teen’s life, 

including school, work, peers, afterschool activities, adult relationships 

and free time. Sometimes it’s a process 

of communication, and other times it 

means comparing notes with other 

adults in your teen’s life, or observing 

your teen, like watching for changes 

in behavior. 

It’s true that some teens will resent being 

monitored, but they generally understand 

and respect monitoring, especially in 

the long-term. Your job as a parent is to 

communicate and be respectful. 

Here are some tips:

• Let your teens know you will be 

monitoring so they know what 

to expect.

• If you suspect your teen is getting 

into trouble, make occasional 

Kids can’t always be counted on 

to do the right thing. Just think 

back to your own teenage years. 

Many of us made choices that make us 

cringe today, and we’re thankful that we 

escaped serious harm. Those experiences 

should be a potent reminder that it’s 

always good to trust your teens but also 

to verify what they’ve told you. This is 

where monitoring comes in.

Monitoring is keeping tabs on your 

teenagers. It includes knowing where 

they are, whom they are with, what they 

are doing and when they will be home. 

It means asking questions, having your 

teens check in with you regularly, and 

checking up on them as well. 

As teens get more involved in activities 

away from home, you have fewer 

opportunities to directly supervise them. 

MONITORING YOUR TEENS
• Check in on your teens at home as 

well. Monitor your medicine cabinet 

to see if your teens have been using 

your prescription or over-the-counter 

drugs, such as cough medicines or 

drugs that contain dextromethorphan 

(DXM). And remember, some teens 

help themselves to their parents’ 

supply of alcoholic beverages.

• Require your teens to check in with 

you when they get home at night. 

This serves as a deterrent to alcohol,

tobacco and illicit drug use because 

your teens know they will have to 

say goodnight. It also gives you an 

opportunity to check for signs of 

use, such as odors on clothing.

• Let teens know that safety is a 

priority and if they ever feel unsafe, 

they can call you.

• Be aware of messages in popular 

culture that encourage alcohol, 

tobacco or illicit drug use. Monitor 

your teen’s use of movies, television, the Internet and other media.

• Be vigilant about your teen’s activities

online. Teens are easily able to 

order prescription medicines from 

online pharmacies. Check the Web 

sites your teen has visited and track 

purchases made with a credit card.

surprise visits to confirm your teen 

is where he or she is actually 

supposed to be. If your teen is visiting 

a friend, call the friend’s house. Let 

your teen know you may do this from 

time to time.

• Be respectful. Ask, don’t interrogate, 

your teen about activities and 

whereabouts.

• Have a standing rule of “no parents, 

no party” so your teens understand 

they are not allowed at any party 

without adult supervision.

• Get involved in your teen’s school 

and activities.

• Get to know other adults in your 

teen’s life, including teachers, 

coaches, neighbors, employers 

and parents of your teen’s friends. 

Use this network to compare notes 

about how your teen is doing.

• Check in with teens about their 

spending and where their money 

is going.

• Monitor your teen’s physical and 

mental health and watch for signs 

of problems.

“My parents keep pretty close tabs. My 

friends’ parents are all my mom’s friends. 

So they cross check with each other.”

– Teen, From Texas

9
or activity online. If you’re worried about 

violating your teen’s privacy, remember 

that your first responsibility is to keep 

your teen safe. Privacy is important 

but it has limits. Set some ground rules 

before there’s a problem so your teen 

knows what to expect. If appropriate, 

give your teen an opportunity to explain 

before taking a more hands-on approach.

If you find out your teen is using alcohol, 

tobacco or illicit drugs, take action. Talk 

to your teen, reiterate your rules and 

expectations and enforce consequences. 

To get help, contact your teen’s school 

counselor, pediatrician or family physician 

or call the National Clearinghouse for 

Alcohol and Drug Information at 

1-800-788-2800 for a listing of treatment 

centers in your area. You can also find 

information online at 

www.findtreatment.samhsa.gov.

Monitoring 

Your Teen: 

Quick Self-Check

_____ Do you follow up on your teen to 

confirm his or her whereabouts?

_____ Do you know where your teen is 

after school and who he or she 

spends time with?

_____ Do you know the parents of your 

teen’s friends and do they know 

and respect your family’s rules?

_____ Do you have rules about where 

your teen can spend time?

How much monitoring is enough? Many 

parents feel like they’re doing the right 

level of monitoring for their teen. But there 

are times when you probably need to step 

it up. Here’s some advice to help determine 

when you need to be doing more:

• When there are changes in your 

teen’s friends, behaviors, attitudes, 

grades or other signs that something 

is going on.

• When your teen is going through a 

transition, such as starting a new 

school, living in a new neighborhood, 

entering high school or starting 

to drive.

• When your teen has already gotten 

into some minor trouble.

• If your teen seems unusually 

stressed. Some teens say they 

misuse or abuse prescription 

drugs because of stress related to 

family life, relationships, academic 

pressures or physical appearance. 

• If your teen seems highly susceptible 

to peer pressure, lacks strong coping 

skills or suffers from anxiety or 

depression.

• If your teen has a high need for 

stimulation, novelty and excitement 

and becomes bored easily. These 

“sensation-seekers” are three times 

more likely to use illicit drugs.

• If your teen comes from a family 

with a history of substance abuse, 

violence or mental health problems.

If you strongly suspect something is 

going on, you have good reason to do 

more hands-on monitoring, such as 

looking through a room or backpack, or 

checking your teen’s cell phone records 

10 
• Identify “hot spots” in your community 

where trouble occurs, including 

sources of alcohol, tobacco and 

illicit drugs. Restrict your teen’s 

access to these spots and talk to 

other parents about your concerns. 

Let officials know about these 

areas and enlist businesses and 

community leaders to help keep 

teens safe.

• Be proactive about checking in with 

other parents when a party or other 

activity is being planned. Share 

your plans for supervision and other 

concerns. Encourage other parents 

to do the same. 

• Get involved with parent groups and 

school organizations to connect 

with other parents and address risky 

teen behavior in your area.

• Get information about drug prevention 

coalitions or similar groups in your 

area and use them as a resource.

Monitoring can be time consuming, but 

one way to ease the burden is to enlist 

the help of others. Your community and 

neighborhood can be valuable resources 

when it comes to keeping teens safe 

and healthy. Here are some ways you 

can use community monitoring to help 

prevent teen risk-taking:

• Stay informed of trends in youth 

risk-taking in your community and 

neighborhood, such as new drugs, 

drinking parties or dangerous 

driving. Talk to your teen and other 

parents about the risks.

• Meet with other parents, neighbors 

and adults in your teen’s life, such 

as coaches or teachers. Share 

your expectations, develop 

common limits and forge an “early 

warning system” to identify kids 

having problems.

Community Monitoring

11

Community Monitoring: 

Quick Self-Check

_____ Have you developed a reliable network of other adults to help monitor your teen?

_____ Do you regularly compare notes with other parents about teen activities?

_____ Are you active in school, neighborhood or other community organizations?

_____ Are you familiar with trends in teen risk-taking in your community?
Respect. It’s all any teenager really 

wants, isn’t it? As teens work 

on gaining independence, they 

want opportunities to assert their own 

identities and make their own decisions. 

They’re craving respect for their ideas, 

opinions and beliefs. 

But showing respect can be hard, 

especially when you are frustrated. Respect 

is a two-way street, and teens are very 

concerned about fairness. When you’re 

disrespectful, they will probably respond 

in-kind. You don’t have to agree all the 

time to show respect, but try to listen 

and treat them fairly.

Research shows that parents who 

respect their teen’s individuality help 

prevent risk-taking and protect their kids 

against depression and other problems. 

On the other hand, when parents try to 

control their teen’s beliefs or stifle their 

opinions, it can undermine confidence 

and lead to other emotional problems. 

Moreover, if you don’t respect your teen, 

she or he’s not likely to respect her or 

himself either. And a kid without self-respect 

is a kid vulnerable to risk-taking and the 

need to “fit in.”

Here’s how to build respect in your 

relationship with your teen:

• Stay involved, but give your teen the 

privacy and space to be an individual.

• Encourage your teen to develop and 

express his or her own opinions 

and ideas.

• Don’t be dismissive of your teen’s 

beliefs if you don’t agree with them. 

Instead, learn to engage your teen in 

a healthy debate.

• Make time to listen and be responsive 

to your teen’s fears and concerns.

• When you have to criticize or discipline 

your teen, focus on the behavior, not 

on your teen. Don’t call your teen 

names or use hurtful language.

• Don’t belittle your teens’ way of 

dressing or appearance or their 

taste in music or entertainment.

• Appreciate and acknowledge your 

teen’s unique interests, skills 

and strengths.

TIP: Teens also need to learn to 

respect themselves. If your teen seems 

worried about fitting in, use the 

opportunity to appeal to the value your 

teen places on independence. 

Acknowledge the pressures he or she 

faces and emphasize the importance of 

individuality and independent thinking.

Principle #3: 

Respect 

Your Teen

12 
Respecting 

Your Teen: 

Quick Self-Check

_____ Do you ask about and respect 

your teen’s worries and 

concerns?

_____ When you disagree with your 

teen, do you take the time 

to listen?

_____ Are you respectful of your 

teen’s friends and taste in 

music or clothes?

_____ Do you take care to treat 

each of your children as 

distinct individuals?

“Teens need their 

space but at the 

same time a parent 

should know what 

they’re doing. If the 

kid feels like you do 

not trust him, he will 

not trust you. Period.”

– ANONYmous Teen

13
Principle #4: 

Be A Good Role Model

Remember when your kids were 

toddlers and they mimicked 

everything you said and did? 

Things are not so different today. You 

may not realize it, but your actions 

communicate a great deal to your 

teenager. Parents who set a good 

example through their relationships and 

social skills have kids who do better in 

the areas of school, employment, 

relationships, communication, coping 

and other life skills. 

Setting a good example is especially 

important when it comes to substance 

use. Parents’ or caregivers’ abuse of 

alcohol, tobacco or illicit drugs significantly 

increases a teen’s chances of using, 

using early and developing a substance 

abuse problem of their own. 

The first thing you can do is deliver 

a clear and consistent message that 

you don’t want your teen using these 

substances. Even if you do use these 

substances, telling your teens to stay 

away from them has a major impact on 

their actions and keeps their use down. 

Also:

• Don’t smoke. If you smoke, quit for 

your own health as well as that of 

your family’s.

• Don’t allow your teen to drink or 

smoke in your home. 

• Don’t provide alcohol to teenagers 

in your home. It’s not safe, it sends 

your teen the wrong message and 

you could be breaking the law. 

• Don’t involve your teen in your use, 

such as asking him or her to get you 

a beer or a cigarette.

• Never drink and drive.

• Enlist other family members or 

friends to serve as positive role 

models for your teen.

Being a Good Role Model: 

Quick Self-Check

_____ Do you have family gatherings and parties that don’t include alcohol? It’s 

important to show your teens that you can have fun whether or not alcohol is served.

_____ Have you shared “funny” stories about your past substance use in front 

of your kids?

_____ Do you use substances to cope with even minor problems or discomforts? 

_____ Get help if you think you have a problem with alcohol or illicit drugs.

14 
“The only way to keep your children from 

going astray is for them to have a role model 

they can respect.” 

– MOM, FROM Missouri

15
Try To Do Daily:

• Know your teen’s main activities and 

plans for the day. 

• Know where your teens are when 

you are at work or not otherwise 

with them, and who they are likely to 

be with.

• If appropriate for that day, remind 

your teen about relevant rules.

• At the end of the day, ask about your 

teen’s activities.

• Praise and thank your teen for good 

behavior.

• Check that homework and other 

responsibilities have been completed.

• Try to have family meals together 

or engage in a family activity on a 

regular basis.

Try To Do Weekly:

• Take some time to check in with 

each child. Set 20 minutes aside to 

find out how friendships are going, 

what’s happening at school and 

what other events are important in 

your teen’s life.

• Ask your teen mid-week if there are 

any special plans for the weekend 

that require your input. Do this early 

to avoid last-minute conflict.

• Every once in a while, check that 

your teens are where they say they 

are going to be.

• Encourage your teen to have a 

friend over or engage in fun 

activities together.

• Remind your teen about weekday/

weekend rules when appropriate.

The Busy 

Parent’s Checklist

So what’s a parent to do with all 

this information? To help, we’ve 

boiled down some key advice 

into a convenient checklist that helps you 

keep in mind simple, easy steps you can 

take each day, week and month to stay 

connected to your teen.

16 
Try To Do Monthly:

• Make sure you’ve had at least a 

couple of individual activities or 

outings with your teen.

• Check the temperature of your 

relationship. How are things going?

• Check in with your teen to see what 

has taken up his or her time and 

interest this month, and discuss it. 

Ask if there’s anything you can do

to help.

• Make sure you’ve followed through 

on any recent promises to your teen.

• Plan one special family event or 

activity. Try to do things that your 

teens enjoy.

• Get a report from teachers on your 

teen’s school progress. Check in 

with coaches or a guidance counselor 

about extracurricular activities.

• Take a monitoring inventory. Who 

has your teen been spending time 

with? What has he been doing? 

Follow up on any red flags or concerns.

• What have they been spending their 

money on? 

• Stay up-to-date on news and trends 

among teens in the area. Talk with 

other parents and discuss concerns 

with your kids. Check with local 

youth organizations to find out about 

problems in your community.

• Check in with your teens about 

rules. If they’ve been doing well, 

then be flexible and reward them 

in meaningful ways. When your 

teens are ready, allow them more 

freedoms. Discuss any new rules or 

limits for new activities.

17
I

t’s worth remembering that most 

teens today are doing well, thanks in 

large part to supportive, loving and 

involved parents, like you. But there’s no 

doubt that parenting a teen can be overwhelming. Even parents who do everything 

“right” sometimes have kids who turn to 

alcohol, tobacco or illicit drugs.

But despite all the competing influences 

in the lives of teens, parents remain their 

kids’ first and best teachers. You don’t 

have to be the expert. You just need to 

focus on being the parent and knowing 

how and when to access the information 

you need. 

Most parents wrestle with their role at 

some point during the teenage years. In 

fact, many parents and caregivers are 

already doing many things right, and just 

need to hear they are on the right path, 

however difficult the passage through 

adolescence may be. Other parents 

might look for more concrete ideas to 

help their teen navigate these tricky 

years. Your parenting style may be strict, 

lenient, or somewhere in-between, but 

whatever the case, the research shows 

that parents and families are a teen’s 

best bet. Be there for your teen, and your 

teenager should be just fine.

A FINAL NOTE

18 
19

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

This parenting handbook was written by the National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign. 

The Media Campaign appreciates the invaluable participation of the following 

organizations in the development and review of this handbook.

American Academy of Pediatrics (www.aap.org)

National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy (www.teenpregnancy.org)

National Prevention Network, Public Information and Media Committee 

NYU Child Study Center (www.aboutourkids.org) 

Parent Corps (www.parentcorps.org)
FOR MORE HELP

This handbook includes information about risky behaviors teens are likely to engage in, 

including underage drinking, sexual activity and drugged driving. Many resources exist 

that address these issues in more detail. You can access these resources at

www.TheAntiDrug.com/parentresources.

For more information and advice on parenting teenagers, visit www.TheAntiDrug.com

(English) or www.LaAntiDroga.com (Spanish). TheAntiDrug.com has resources that 

can help you understand your specific style; your teen’s emotional, psychological and 

physical development; and pressures facing teens today. The site also includes the 

latest information about illicit drugs and prevention, as well as booklets you 

can download.

You can also call 1-800-788-2800 or 1-877-SIN-DROGAS (Spanish) or email 

nyac@theantidrug.com for more information and materials.

20 
My Parent Network 

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PARENTS OF FRIENDS

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For more copies of this handbook or additional anti-drug and parent resources 

call 1-800-788-2800 or visit www.TheAntiDrug.com.

Office Of National Drug Control Policy

Nat i o nal Youth A n t i -Drug M e d ia Campai g n

PHD1127