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Guide for Families Experiencing the Criminal Justice System

GUIDE FOR ARREST, JAIL TIME/DETENTION, TRIAL/HEARING, 

AND SENTENCING STAGES (Guide 1 of 3)

http://www.YOUth.gOv/COIp

Families have unique needs and challenges when 

a parent is arrested. When this happens, family 

members—including the children—are affected. 

This guide is the first in a series of three guides 

that cover a family’s journey as the family goes 

through the stages of, and copes with, a loved 

one’s involvement in the justice system. 

This guide covers the first four stages in the 

typical criminal justice process, and the other 

two guides cover incarceration and reentry: 

• Arrest (entry into the system)

• Jail Time/Detention (prosecution 

and pretrial services)

• Hearing/Trial (adjudication)

• Sentencing (before incarceration)

• Incarceration (Guide 2)

• Reentry (Guide 3)

This guide starts with descriptions and definitions

of the stages to help families understand the 

legal terms and processes. Having a better 

understanding may help families feel less 

overwhelmed. It may also help families know 

what to expect and what will happen next. 

Questions and tips are discussed later in the 

guide. The questions are designed to help 

families and caregivers anticipate and respond to 

thoughts and concerns their children may have. 

The tips offer suggestions to help caregivers 

support and care for the children of parents who 

are in jail.

FAMILIES WILL TALK TO MANY 

PEOPLE DURING THESE FOUR 

STAGES: 

• Lawyer or public defender

• Judge and court personnel 

• Probation officer

• Law enforcement

• Jail or detention facility staff

• Jail or detention case worker

• Child welfare (in some cases)

Families can use the worksheet on the 

last page of this guide to keep track of 

important names, phone numbers, and 

e-mail addresses.
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Description of Stages

Please note: This guide is general in nature. State laws vary, and courts differ in their proceedings. The 

descriptions provided are general explanations of the stages. For more details about the stages of the 

criminal justice system, see the chart from the American Bar Association (Appendix). 

Arrest

During an arrest, a person is taken into custody. An arrested person 

is brought to the police station or lock-up facility (jail/detention). Law 

enforcement officers make most arrests. Arrests are based on a suspicion 

or evidence that a person committed or was involved in a crime. Sometimes, 

a court issues a demand (called a warrant) for a person’s arrest. During an 

arrest, the arrested person is read his or her rights, also known as Miranda 

rights (https://www.uscourts.gov/educational-resources/educationalactivities/facts-and-case-summary-miranda-v-arizona). Miranda rights include the right to remain 

silent (not answer any questions asked by law enforcement) and to be represented by an attorney (this 

infographic has the exact words a police officer will say: https://www.uscourts.gov/sites/default/files/

mirandawarningfinal.pdf). 

Jail Time/Detention

A person who is arrested is placed in jail or in a detention facility. These are 

locked facilities located in the community or in a nearby community. Jail time/

detention refers to the time after an arrest but before a person appears before 

a judge or jury for a hearing or trial. The term also describes the time after 

the person has been convicted of a crime and is awaiting sentencing and 

placement or incarceration in a secure federal, state, or locally operated facility. 

Jail time or detention involves confinement and a loss of freedom that can last 

from hours to days to months and sometimes years.

Hearing/Trial

Generally, during a hearing or trial, lawyers or other court officials present evidence or facts about 

a legal matter. A judge or court official presides over hearings and trials. A hearing differs from a 

trial. Compared with a trial, a hearing does not include a jury, is shorter, and is referred to as pretrial 

proceedings. A preliminary hearing is usually held within 48 hours of a person being placed in jail/

detention. This hearing may examine whether there is enough evidence to continue holding the 

person. Important decisions are made during a hearing. Family members may be asked to attend the 

hearing and speak on behalf of the arrested person.

This process may involve setting bail. Bail is security (usually in the form of money) for the release of 

the person charged with a crime. The court sets bail if the judge decides the suspected offender is 

likely to show up for his or her court date and does not pose a threat to the community outside of jail 

while awaiting trial. 

The U.S. Department 

of Justice defines 

arrest as “depriving 

a person of his [or 

her] liberty by legal 

authority.”

The U.S. 

Department of 

Justice defines jail 

time/detention

as “the act or 

fact of holding a 

person in custody; 

confinement or 

compulsory delay.”
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A criminal trial involves two sides. The prosecution

is the attorney trying the case against the accused 

person. The defense is the attorney defending the 

accused person. Both sides present evidence to either 

a judge or to a judge and jury. Evidence includes calling 

witnesses to testify about the facts. As a family member, 

you may be asked to appear in court and provide 

details about the person who is on trial. Seek the help 

of a lawyer to better know your rights and what you 

are required or not required to do or say. For example, 

a spouse may not have to speak against his or her 

partner. If you need help finding a lawyer, you may want 

to contact the Legal Aid Society in your city or state.

The judge or court official typically makes a decision at 

the end of a hearing or trial. The decision either holds 

the accused person for trial, releases the person, or 

sets a moderate fine or punishment. Bail may also be 

set at this time.

Sentencing

During sentencing, the judge imposes a punishment on a person 

who has admitted guilt or been found guilty of a crime. Sentencing 

typically happens a few weeks or months after the verdict 

at the trial is made. The judge uses guidelines and 

recommendations for punishment based on 

type of crime, whether the person has committed the same crime 

before, whether the person who committed the crime expresses 

regret, and statements by the victims of the crime. Punishment can 

include a fine, community service, time in jail or prison, or probation. 

Because there may be time between the trial and sentencing and 

between sentencing and incarceration, the offender may return 

to the home temporarily, with a specific date to return to court 

or report to placement. Probation is release into the community with special terms. The terms are 

created by the courts and probation staff. During probation, the convicted person is usually supervised 

by a probation officer. Probation may be called “conditional freedom.” Such freedom may be taken 

away if the convicted person does not follow the terms of probation.

Helpful link for more information:

https://www.justice.gov/usao/justice-101/sentencing

The U.S. Department of Justice 

defines sentencing as “The 

punishment ordered by a court 

for a defendant convicted of a 

crime. Federal courts look to 

the United States Sentencing 

Commission Guidelines 

when deciding the proper 

punishment for 

a given crime.”

Definitions of hearing and trial according to 

the U.S. Department of Justice: 

Hearing: “A proceeding similar to a trial, 

without a jury, and usually of shorter 

duration.”

Preliminary hearing: “A hearing where the 

judge decides whether there is enough 

evidence to require the defendant to go to 

trial. Preliminary hearings do not require the 

same rules as trials. For example, hearsay 

is often admissible during the preliminary 

hearing but not at trial.” 

Trial: “A hearing that takes place when 

the defendant pleads ‘not guilty,’ and the 

parties are required to come to court to 

present evidence.”
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Questions, by Age Group

Children may ask many questions about the parent being arrested, especially if the parent is convicted 

and is no longer at home. Let children know it is okay to ask questions and that you may not have all 

the answers, but you will try to find out. Try to answer in a positive manner. Ask follow-up questions 

to make sure you understand the children’s questions. 

As a family member or caregiver, here are some questions you may be asked by a child or youth. 

Questions are grouped by age groups: children (0–6 and 7–12 years old), youth (13–18 years old), and 

young adults (19–25 years old). These age groups are only ranges.

Girls and boys can express their questions and feelings differently. If asked, some children may be 

more open to discussing their thoughts and feelings. Other children may be more restrained. Consider 

the children’s maturity levels, genders, and abilities to handle a discussion about arrest, jail time/

detention, trial/hearing, and sentencing. For children of all ages, a helpful conversation starter can be 

to share that you have mixed feelings about the situation. This may help them to feel at ease. Then, ask 

the children how they feel about the situation. Not all children will ask these questions.

Children 0–6 Years Old 

1. Why did the police take Mom or Dad away?

2. When will Mom or Dad be home again? 

3. Who will take care of me? 

4. Why isn’t Mom or Dad here to tuck me in?

5. Can I stay with Mom or Dad? 

6. Can you take me to see Mom or Dad?

7. Is Mom or Dad okay?

Note: Children ages 0–6 who witnessed the crime 

or arrest may be scared. If the children are old 

enough, talk to them to find out what they think 

about what they saw. Children this age may not be 

able to verbalize thoughts and feelings. You could 

ask them to draw a picture about how they felt 

when the arrest happened.

Children 7–12 Years Old

1. Is Mom or Dad a bad person?

2. Are the police good people?

3. Will Mom or Dad be safe in jail?

4. What did they do to have the police take 

them away?

5. When will Mom or Dad be home again?

6. Who will take care of me?

7. Who will decide what happens to Mom 

or Dad?

8. What will the judge do?

9. Can I go visit them? When can I see them?

Note: Children ages 7–12 and youth ages 13–18 

years old may have seen things on television and 

in movies about arrest and jail. Ask what the young 

person knows and understands to be real and not 

real about the criminal justice system.
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Youth 13–18 Years Old 

1. When can I see Mom or Dad again? 

2. What did Mom or Dad do?

3. Will my friends find out, and what will they think?

4. What do I tell my friends?

5. What happens next? What happens at court 

with the hearing? 

6. Can I go visit them? When can I see them?

7. Will Mom or Dad be safe in jail?

8. Who will help Mom or Dad? Do they have a 

lawyer? Do they get to tell their side of the story?

Young Adults 19–25 Years Old 

1. What impact will this have on my life? 

2. Who will find out, and what will they think?

3. When other family members and my friends 

find out, what do I tell them?

4. Can I do anything to help Mom or Dad? 

Should I testify on their behalf?

5. How can I help the family deal with this crisis?

Note: Young people 19–25 years old may appear 

to be unconcerned by the parent’s arrest. However, 

they may have concerns and questions that they 

may not know how to express or that they may feel 

awkward to ask. Starting the conversation 

with them may be helpful.

Did the children witness the arrest?

Witnessing a parent’s arrest can be very traumatic to children and youth of all ages. If the children witnessed 

the arrest, you may want to ask them about their feelings and ask if they have any questions about what 

they saw. Children who have witnessed an arrest may show signs of anxiety or depression. They may have 

trouble in school and may have difficulty controlling their emotions. If you see these behaviors in the children, 

encourage them to talk about their feelings with you or with a trusted adult, or you may consider seeking 

help for the children from a professional. 

Tips

These tips about arrest, jail time, hearing, and sentencing may help the family communicate with 

the parent who has been arrested, help manage stress and emotions, and learn ways to prioritize 

self-care and care for the children. Many of the tips are informed by listening sessions with parents 

who are incarcerated and youth who have or have had a parent who was incarcerated: https://youth.

gov/coip/listening-session.

Consider the following factors as you help children handle their parent’s incarceration:

• Children’s ages and maturity levels

• Children’s experiences with the police and the arrest or confinement of others

• Whether the children witnessed the arrest

• Ways the family will be disrupted or impacted (in the short and long term)

• Whether community supports may help the family overcome difficulties

The tips in this guide are important for families and caregivers with children of any age. Tips are 

organized under three topics: communication, information gathering, and care for self and the 

children of the detained or incarcerated parent. 

These tips are suggestions. Not every tip is right for every family. Choose tips that are the right fit 

for the children, the family, and the parent who is in jail.
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Communication

• Discuss with the children how best to address questions 

from friends, teachers, neighbors, and other family 

members. Think about how much of the family story you 

want to share. 

{ You may decide to tell the school social worker, guidance 

counselor, and teachers. If you do, ask them to be 

sensitive to certain activities, such as making cards on 

Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, or other holidays. 

{ You may ask neighbors, family members, and school staff 

to be careful about speaking negatively about persons 

who have been charged with a crime or who are in jail 

awaiting trial. Ask them to not make statements such as, 

“People who are in jail are bad people.” 

{ Help children answer questions their peers may ask 

about the parent’s absence. Children may have to face 

questions such as, “Where is your dad?” or “Why isn’t 

your mom at our basketball game this week?” 

• If the children see a counselor or therapist, tell the counselor 

or therapist the thoughts and concerns the children share with you, and encourage the children to 

speak to the counselor about their feelings.

• Consider visiting and communicating with the parent based on the parent’s and the children’s 

needs and wishes. Consider the children’s maturity levels and abilities to understand the situation. 

Consider factors at the facility, such as the visiting area. 

• When the children are around, try to keep your comments positive or neutral, even if there are 

things about law enforcement, the courts, the facility, staff, or rules that upset you.

• As a condition of probation, courts may decide that the parent cannot move back into the home 

or may see the children only when another caregiver is present. Encourage the parent to follow 

the rules of the probation. If possible, talk with a counselor about how best to prepare children 

for this situation. A counselor may be available through the courts, the children’s school, the local 

mental health center, advocacy organizations, or a community-based organization. 

Information Gathering

• As a caregiver, seek information and ask questions at every stage in the justice process. The 

more you know, the better you will understand the process and next steps. Use the worksheet on 

page 8 to keep track of important people with whom you talk and get information. However, use 

caution when sharing information or details about your family member’s case because what you 

say may be used in court. 

• As you learn more about the justice process, you may want to explain or share details, as 

appropriate, with the children so that they know what to expect. This may relieve children’s 

anxieties and help answer their questions when they do not know how to express themselves 

about the process.

• Every facility has rules and procedures that must be followed when visiting a person in jail. 

Find out about the rules before you visit by asking your case worker, asking the parent who 

is incarcerated, reading the information from the facility, or visiting the facility’s or corrections 

Extra Resource: This video 

and discussion guide are 

designed for school staff who 

provide direct supports and 

services to students: teachers, 

administrators, and support 

staff (e.g., school social worker, 

psychologist, guidance 

counselor, librarian, art teacher, 

PE teacher, cafeteria worker, 

custodian, bus driver). School 

staff contributed to the planning 

and content and several are 

featured in the video. 

https://youth.gov/youth-topics/

children-of-incarceratedparents/federal-toolsresources/tools-school-staff
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agency’s website. For more tips on visiting, see the second guide in this 

series, which is about incarceration.

• Follow the court’s and facility’s rules. Ask questions if something isn’t clear. If 

your family member has an attorney or public defender, ask the attorney or 

public defender about court rules and procedures. 

{ A facility’s priorities are safety and security. The court’s priorities are 

community safety, fair and speedy trials and judgment, and protection of 

victims’ rights. 

Self-Care and Care for the Children of a Detained or 

Incarcerated Parent 

• Care for both yourself and that of family members and children is important 

during this difficult time. Caregivers often experience multiple and conflicting 

thoughts and feelings about parents who are incarcerated. 

{ Caregiver emotions are similar to those experienced by the children (anger, sadness, 

guilt, shame, resentment, fear, and anxiety). Caregivers might feel embarrassed about 

their emotions. It is extremely important for your physical and emotional health that you 

appropriately manage your thoughts and feelings by communicating with a trusted individual. 

• Develop a plan for caregiving during the parent’s absence.

{ Ask aunts, uncles, or grandparents to be a resource for children as they adjust to the parent’s 

absence.

• Help children through changes in daily routines during the parent’s absence (homework, 

bedtimes, and discipline).

• Remember, you do not have to go through this alone. Seek out support and services, such as 

advocacy and transportation, from faith- and community-based organizations such as churches, 

Boys & Girls Clubs, afterschool clubs, or the school counselor. 

• Remind the children often that the parent’s arrest is not the children’s fault. 

Children may struggle with stress, anger, anxiety, depression, or feelings 

of shame over the social stigma of having a parent who is detained or 

incarcerated. 

• Consider professional counseling for yourself, family members, and children. 

Counseling is important if the children saw the arrest or feel responsible for 

it. Your doctor or the children’s pediatrician can suggest licensed counselors 

in your area. 

• Pay attention to the family’s budget needs from the loss of the arrested 

parent’s income and the increase of childcare costs. Seek out advice for 

making ends meet with reduced income. 

• Roles, responsibilities, and relationships may change. The caregiver will be 

focused on navigating the system, which may take the caregiver away from 

his or her traditional role. To help relieve stress on the caregiver, children, and 

other family members, discuss how everyone can support each other. 

Extra 

Resource: 

youth.gov has 

some helpful 

information 

about 

budgeting 

and finances: 

https://

youth.gov/

youth-topics/

financialcapabilityliteracy

Extra 

Resource: 

This website 

from the 

Bureau of 

Prisons has 

helpful general 

visiting 

information: 

https://www.

bop.gov/

inmates/

visiting.jsp
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Conclusion

This guide is designed to help families and caregivers provide support for children whose parent is 

involved with the criminal justice system. Two additional guides in this series describe incarceration 

and reentry. Visit the youth.gov/coip website for more information and helpful resources.

Appendix
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Important Contact Information

Name Position Phone 

Number E-Mail Address Notes

Lawyer 

or public 

defender

Social 

worker 

Jail/

detention 

center case 

worker

Jail/

detention 

center staff

Probation 

officer or 

other court 

personnel

Family 

liaison for 

facility

Family 

support 

organization

In case of 

emergency

Other

Other

Other