The

Tongue and Quill

AFH 33-337

1 AUGUST 2004

Communication is an essential tool for the 

 twenty-first century Air Force

BY ORDER OF THE AIR FORCE HANDBOOK 33-337 

SECRETARY OF THE AIR FORCE 1 AUGUST 2004 

Communications and Information 

THE TONGUE AND QUILL 

Supersedes AFH 33-337, 30 June 1997. Certified by: ACSC/DEO (Lt Col Bart Kessler) 

COMMUNICATING IS A 

POWERFUL TOOL FOR THE 

TWENTY-FIRST CENTURY

AIR FORCE

The Tongue and Quill is dedicated to every man and woman in today’s Air Force who will ever 

sling ink at paper, pound a keyboard, give a briefing, or staff a package to support the mission. 

Currently, The Tongue and Quill is widely used by Air Force military and civilian members, 

professional military school educators and students, and civilian corporations around the United 

States. 

As United States Air Force employees, it is important we communicate clearly and effectively to 

carry out our mission. This handbook together with AFMAN 33-326, Preparing Official 

Communications, will provide the necessary information to ensure clear communications—

written or spoken. The use of the name or mark of any specific manufacturer, commercial 

product, commodity, or service in this publication does not imply endorsement by the Air Force 

To all you enthusiastic users worldwide, keep up the good fight! 

SUMMARY OF REVISIONS 

This revision improved organization; rearranged layout; updated quotes, art and word lists; and 

added material on preparing to write and speak, writing with focus, communicating to persuade, 

research, meetings, briefings and listening; updated information on electronic communication 

and e-mail, and added information on Air Force writing products such as awards, decorations 

and performance reports. 

OPR: ACSC/DEOP (Mrs. Sharon McBride) Pages: 378 /Distribution F 
Acknowledgements 

The Tongue and Quill has been a valued Air Force resource for decades, and many people have 

contributed their talents to various editions over the years. I’d like to acknowledge the efforts of 

several personnel who overhauled chapters in this edition, including Lt Colonel Kimberly 

Demoret (Chapters 1, 2, 4, 5, and 11), Lt Colonel Janelle Costa (Chapter 7), Major Jane 

Palmisano (Chapters 3, 6, 8, 10, and 13), Major Keith Tonnies (Chapter 9), Major Marci 

Watkins (Appendix 2), and Major Kathy Dowdy (Appendix 3). Ms. Stephanie Rollins provided 

technical inputs for Chapter 4 and compiled its extensive list of Internet sources. Also, MSgt 

Douglas McCarty who provided the accomplishment-impact bullets for the Bullet Background 

Paper and the Performance Report. I would also like to thank Lt Col Demoret for her support 

during the planning, integration and editing processes. 

– Sharon McBride, Tongue and Quill OPR
 

THE 

CONTENTS 

PART I: COMMUNICATON BASICS ................................................................................................... 1

Chapter 1: A Basic Philosophy of Communication............................................................................... 3

Chapter 2: Seven Steps to Effective Communication: An Overview................................................... 9

PART II: PREPARING TO WRITE AND SPEAK ............................................................................. 15

Chapter 3: Analyzing Purpose and Audience...................................................................................... 17 

Chapter 4: Researching Your Topic .................................................................................................... 25 

Chapter 5: Supporting Your Ideas....................................................................................................... 41 

Chapter 6: Organizing and Outlining Your Thoughts......................................................................... 55

PART III: WRITING WITH FOCUS ................................................................................................... 63

Chapter 7: Writing Your Draft ............................................................................................................ 65 

Chapter 8: Editing Your Draft............................................................................................................. 91 

Chapter 9: Fighting for Feedback and Getting Approval.................................................................. 105

PART IV: FACE-TO-FACE: SPEAKING AND LISTENING ....................................................... 113

Chapter 10: Air Force Speaking........................................................................................................ 115 

Chapter 11: Effective Listening Strategies........................................................................................ 131

PART V: WORKPLACE CHALLENGES ......................................................................................... 141 

Chapter 12: Electronic Communication ............................................................................................ 143 

Chapter 13: Meetings ........................................................................................................................ 155

– iii – 
PART VI: AIR FORCE WRITING PRODUCTS AND TEMPLATES ........................................... 165

The Quill............................................................................................................................................. 165 

Personal Letter.................................................................................................................................... 167 

Official Memorandum........................................................................................................................ 183 

In Turn Memo .................................................................................................................................... 187 

Indorsement Memo............................................................................................................................. 189 

Short-Note Reply................................................................................................................................ 193 

Memorandum for Record ................................................................................................................... 195 

Trip Report ......................................................................................................................................... 197 

Staff Study Report.............................................................................................................................. 199 

Talking Paper ..................................................................................................................................... 209 

Bullet Background Paper.................................................................................................................... 211 

Background Paper .............................................................................................................................. 215 

Position Paper..................................................................................................................................... 217 

Staff Summary Sheet.......................................................................................................................... 219 

Performance Report ........................................................................................................................... 225 

Awards and Decorations..................................................................................................................... 237 

Air Force Publications........................................................................................................................ 241 

Biography ........................................................................................................................................... 243 

Résumé ............................................................................................................................................... 247 

Envelope............................................................................................................................................. 259 

APPENDIX 1: THE MECHANICS OF WRITING ........................................................................... 263

Glossary of Common Grammatical and Writing Terms..................................................................... 265 

Punctuation Guidelines: An Alphabetical Listing............................................................................. 273 

Abbreviating ABCs............................................................................................................................ 309 

Capitalization Guidelines ................................................................................................................... 317 

Numbers, Numbers, Numbers............................................................................................................ 331 

APPENDIX 2: THE MECHANICS OF RESEARCH........................................................................ 337

APPENDIX 3: EFFECTIVE READING STRATEGIES................................................................... 355

APPENDIX 4: BIBLIOGRAPHY AND OTHER REFERENCES ................................................... 365 

THE INDEX ............................................................................................................................................ 367 

Alphabetical Arrangement of Topics 

– iv – 
PART I: 

COMMUNICATION BASICS

– 1 –
... so why 

should we care 

about 

communication 

skills? 

We fly and 

fight for a 

living ... 

– 2 –
 

CHAPTER 1 

A BASIC 

PHILOSOPHY 

OF 

COMMUNICATION 

This chapter covers: 

• How we define communication. 

• Why communication is important in today’s Air Force. 

• Characteristics of effective communication. 

• Common problems encountered when people try to communicate. 

This is an exciting time to be in the United States Air Force! Our mission and our 

operations tempo reflect the larger world around us—a world of rapidly accelerating 

technology and nearly unlimited access to information. Airmen are successfully 

accomplishing more missions with fewer people than ever before, and there is a constant 

battle to cover the bases with limited resources. With many demands on their time, why 

should the men and women of the Air Force care about effective communication? This 

chapter answers that question, identifies five principles of effective communication, and 

describes common speaking and writing problems. 

– 3 –
The Tongue and Quill 

WHAT DO WE MEAN BY COMMUNICATION, 

...AND WHY IS IT SO IMPORTANT? 

Why are we

here again? 

com•mu•ni•ca•tion n 1: an

act or instance of transmitting 

information; 2: a verbal or 

written message; 3: a process 

by which information is 

exchanged between individuals 

through a common system of 

symbols, signs or behavior. 

Communication is defined as the process of sharing ideas, information and messages with 

others. In the Air Force, most communication involves speaking and writing, but this 

definition includes nonverbal communication such as body language, graphics, etc. 

Any communication can be broken into three parts: the sender, the message and the 

audience. For communication to be successful, the audience must not only get the 

message, but must interpret the message in the way the sender intended. 

Since communication requires effort, it should always have a purpose. If the purpose 

isn’t clear to the audience, you will have a problem! Most Air Force communication is 

intended to direct, inform (or educate), persuade or inspire. Often the sender has some

combination of these motives in mind. 

Chapter 3 describes the process of determining your purpose and audience in detail, but 

here are a few examples of Air Force communication targeted toward a specific 

objective: 

The headquarters staff (the sender) 

 writes a new policy on trip report procedures (the message) 

and sends a copy to all subordinate units (the audience). 

Purpose of this communication: to direct

An aircraft technician (the sender) 

reports the results of an aircraft engine inspection (the message) 

to his supervisor (the audience). 

Purpose of this communication: to inform

A branch chief (the sender) 

requests additional funding for new computers (the message) 

in a meeting with the division chief (the audience). 

Purpose of this communication: to persuade 

– 4 –
A Basic Philosophy of Communication

Most communication outside the Air Force falls in these categories as well. Can you spot 

the purpose of each of the following sentences? 

“You didn’t wash the car like you promised.” 

“But Dad! Everyone else is going to the beach. Why can’t I go?”

“Son, I know you’re a fine young man, and fine young men keep their promises.” 

“Aw, Dad...” 

“Wash the car NOW!” 

If you look carefully, you can see the efforts to inform, direct, persuade or inspire in this 

common conversation. 

COMMUNICATION, TEAMWORK AND LEADERSHIP 

Communication skills are vitally important in any environment where teamwork is 

important. Simply put, communication enables us to come together to accomplish things 

better than we can accomplish as individuals. Communication skills are particularly 

important for leaders. The ability to communicate a vision and direction, to motivate and 

inspire others and to persuade our superiors are all essential in bringing people together to 

achieve a common goal. 

The military environment is unique, and much of its uniqueness requires extraordinary 

communication skills. We operate highly technical equipment in a lethal environment 

and we are held to very high standards by the country we serve. Miscommunication can 

cause expensive mistakes, embarrass our organization and in some cases cause accidents 

or even death. 

A CALL TO ARMS... 

This book is designed to give you tools and ideas that will help you learn to communicate 

better ... and to teach others as well. 

Both the Air Force and the large culture we live in are drowning in a sea of information. 

Around-the-clock media coverage, universal electronic mail (e-mail), and the expansion 

of the Internet and other electronic information sources make it difficult for us to sift out 

the valuable information we need to accomplish our mission. Now, more than ever, it’s 

important to communicate with clarity and focus. 

The only way to become a better writer and speaker is to work at it—there are no short 

cuts. The good news is that service in the Air Force will provide plenty of opportunities 

for you to improve. Your communication skills will become stronger with practice, 

regardless of your initial ability, and this book is designed to help you on your journey. 

 

“Perseverance is a great element of success. If you only knock

long enough and loud enough at the gate, you are sure to wake

somebody up.” 

 — Henry Wadsworth Longfellow 

– 5 –
The Tongue and Quill 

PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION 

Once you accept that communication is important, it’s important to understand what 

makes communication succeed and what makes it fail. Most mistakes are caused by 

forgetting one of five principles of good communication. This section addresses these 

core principles, which we’ve organized to spell out the acronym FOCUS. It also 

describes some of the most common mistakes that occur when you miss the mark. 

c FOCUSED: ADDRESS THE ISSUE, THE 

WHOLE ISSUE AND NOTHING BUT THE 

ISSUE 

FOCUS Principles 

Strong Writing and Speaking: 

Focused 

Address the issue, the whole issue and 

nothing but the issue. 

Organized 

Systematically present your information

and ideas. 

Clear 

Communicate with clarity and make 

each word count. 

Understanding

Understand your audience and its 

expectations. 

Supported 

Use logic and support to make your

point.

The first hallmark of good communication is that 

it is focused—the sender has a clear idea of 

purpose and objective, locks on target and stays 

on track. 

In staff or academic environment, writing and 

speaking often attempts to answer a question 

provided by either a boss or an instructor. In such 

situations, the principle may also be stated as the 

following: 

Answer the question, the whole question and 

nothing but the question. 

Failure to focus comes in three forms: 

1. Answering the wrong question. This happens when 

we don’t understand the assignment or what the audience 

really wants. Have you ever written what you thought was an excellent paper, only to be 

told you answered the wrong question or you missed the point? Have you ever asked 

someone a question and received a long answer that had nothing to do with what you 

asked? 

fo·cus n

1. a state or condition

permitting clear perception or

understanding: direction; 2. a

center of activity, attraction or

attention; a point of 

concentration; directed

attention: emphasis. 

2. Answering only part of the question. If a problem or question has multiple parts, 

sometimes we work out the easiest or most interesting part of the solution and forget the 

unpleasant remainder. 

3. Adding irrelevant information. Here the communicator answers the question, but 

mixes in information that is interesting but unnecessary. Though the answer is complete, 

it’s hard to understand—it’s like finding that needle in the haystack. 

– 6 –
A Basic Philosophy of Communication

Failure to focus can really hurt staff communication. Time and time again our efforts 

crash and burn because we never carefully read the words or really listen to the speaker 

for the real message ... for the specific question! Most executive officers will tell you 

that failing to answer the question is one of the primary reasons staff packages are 

dumped back into the laps of hapless action officers. 

Chapter 3 provides suggestions on how to be clear on your purpose and avoid these 

problems. 

d ORGANIZED: SYSTEMATICALLY PRESENT YOUR INFORMATION AND 

IDEAS 

Good organization means your material is presented in a logical, systematic manner. 

This helps your audience understand you without reading your words over and over, 

trying to sort out what you’re really trying to say. 

When writing or speaking is not well organized, audiences become easily confused or 

impatient, and may stop reading or listening. Even if you’re providing useful, relevant 

information, your audience may underestimate its value and your own credibility. 

Chapter 6 is full of suggestions on how to organize well. Problems with organization are 

relatively easy to fix, and the payoffs are enormous. In these high-tempo environments, a 

little effort on your part will save your audience a lot of time and pain. 

e CLEAR: COMMUNICATE WITH CLARITY AND MAKE EACH WORD COUNT 

This principle covers two interrelated ideas. First, to communicate clearly, we need to 

understand the rules of language—how to spell and pronounce words, and how to 

assemble and punctuate sentences. Second, we should get to the point, not hide our ideas 

in a jungle of words. 

People are quick to judge, and mangled, incorrect language can cripple your credibility 

and limit acceptance of your ideas. Acceptable English is part of the job, so commit to 

improving any problems you may have. Developing strong language skills is a lot like 

developing strong muscles—steady commitment produces steady improvement. Always 

remember that progress, not perfection, is the goal. 

Grammar scares most of us, but the good news is that many common mistakes can be 

corrected by understanding a few rules. Start by scanning our section on editing 

sentences, phrases and words on pages 95-101. If you want to dig deeper, then check out 

some of the books and Internet sites that address grammar and writing—contact your 

local librarian or our References section for some suggestions. 

Using language correctly is only half of the battle, though—many Air Force writers and 

speakers cripple themselves with bureaucratic jargon, big words and lots of passive voice. 

These bad habits make it hard to understand the message. See Chapter 7 pages 73-88 for 

some suggested cures to these problems. 

– 7 –
The Tongue and Quill 

f UNDERSTANDING: UNDERSTAND YOUR AUDIENCE AND ITS 

EXPECTATIONS

If you want to share an idea with others, it helps to understand their current knowledge, 

views and level of interest in the topic. If you’ve been asked to write a report, it helps to 

understand the expected format and length of the response, the due date, the level of 

formality and any staffing requirements. It’s easy to see how mistakes in understanding 

your audience can lead to communication problems, and I’m sure you’ve watched others 

make this mistake. Check out Chapter 3 for some helpful hints on audience analysis. 

g SUPPORTED: USE LOGIC AND 

SUPPORT TO MAKE YOUR POINT 

Most writers and speakers try to inform or 

persuade their audience. Part of the 

communicator’s challenge is to assemble and organize information to help build his or 

her case. Support and logic are the tools used to build credibility and trust with our 

audience. 

sup·port n information that 

substantiates a position. 

v to furnish evidence for a position. 

Nothing cripples a clearly written, properly punctuated paper quicker than a fractured fact 

or a distorted argument. Avoiding this pitfall is most difficult, even for good writers and 

speakers. Logic is tough to teach and learn because it challenges the highest levels of

human intellect—the ability to think in the abstract. We slip into bad habits at an early

age, and it takes effort to break them. Chapter 4 provides practical advice on how to use 

support and logic to enhance your effectiveness as a speaker and how to avoid common 

mistakes. 

SUMMARY 

In this chapter, we defined communication as the process of sharing ideas, information, 

and messages with others, and described how effective communication enables military

personnel to work together. To help writers and speakers stay on target, we introduced 

five FOCUS principles of effective communication. In the next chapter, we’ll describe a 

systematic approach to help you attain these principles and meet your communication 

goals. 

“Jargon allows us to camouflage intellectual poverty with verbal 

extravagance.” 

 — David Pratt 

– 8 –
CHAPTER 2 

SEVEN STEPS 

TO EFFECTIVE 

COMMUNICATION: 

AN OVERVIEW

This chapter covers: 

• A systematic process to help achieve communication success. 

• How this process helps attain FOCUS principles from Chapter 1. 

• Where to find detailed information on each step in later chapters. 

Chapter 1 introduced five FOCUS principles of good communication. In this chapter, we’ll 

introduce a seven-step approach to hitting the target. Here you’ll get the big picture introduction, 

but later chapters will describe each of the seven steps in greater detail. 

You can tailor the steps to your own style and approach, but completing each of them will 

increase your chances of speaking and writing success. These steps are not always used in 

sequence, and for long and complicated assignments you may find yourself moving back and 

forth between steps. That’s OK—it’s better to deviate from a plan, than to have no plan at all. 

– 9 –
The Tongue and Quill 

PREPARING TO WRITE AND SPEAK: THE FIRST FOUR STEPS 

Like many things, good communication 

requires preparation, and the first four steps 

lay the groundwork for the drafting process. 

Though much of this seems like common 

sense, you’d be surprised at how many people 

skip the preparation and launch into writing 

sentences and paragraphs (or speaking “off 

the cuff”). DON’T DO IT! Good speaking 

or writing is like building a house—you need 

a good plan and a firm foundation. 

SEVEN STEPS FOR EFFECTIVE 

COMMUNICATION 

1. Analyze Purpose and Audience 

2. Research Your Topic 

3. Support Your Ideas 

4. Organize and Outline 

5. Draft

6. Edit 

7. Fight for Feedback and Get Approval

c ANALYZE PURPOSE AND AUDIENCE 

“Where there is no vision, the people perish.” 

 — Proverbs 29:18 

Too many writers launch into their project without a clear understanding of their purpose 

or audience. This is a shame—a few minutes spent on this step can save hours of 

frustration later, and help determine whether you end up looking like an eagle or a turkey. 

You’re much more likely to hit the target if you know what and who you’re aiming at. 

Carefully analyzing your purpose helps with FOCUS Principle #1: “Focused—answer the 

question, the whole question and nothing but the question.” In some cases, if you take a 

hard look at the purpose you might find that a formal paper or briefing might not be 

needed. You’d be startled at how many briefings, paper documents and electronic 

messages are processed in a typical day in a MAJCOM or wing. Formal communication 

takes effort and costs money—make sure you don’t unnecessarily add to everybody’s 

workload. 

If you take the time to “understand your audience” (FOCUS Principle #4) and think about 

their current knowledge, interest and motives, you’ll be better able to tailor your message 

so that you’ll accomplish your purpose, regardless of what it is. Instructing a hostile 

audience about changes in medical benefits will be different than inspiring a friendly 

audience at a Veteran’s Day celebration, and writing for the general’s signature will be 

different than writing for the base newspaper. Chapter 3 has lots of helpful suggestions 

about analyzing purpose and audience. 

d RESEARCH YOUR TOPIC 

“Truth is generally the best vindication against slander.” 

— Abraham Lincoln 

Remember that FOCUS Principle #5 states good communication should be supported

with information relevant to your point. Step Two—“Research your topic”—gives you 

the raw material to build your case. 

For many of us, “research” sounds intimidating—it brings back memories of painful 

school projects and hostile librarians who wouldn’t let us sneak coffee into the building. 

Don’t let the idea of research scare you. In the context of the seven-step approach, 

– 10 –
Seven Steps to Effective Communication

research is the process of digging up information that supports your communication 

goals. Think of it as “doing your homework” to get smart on your communication topic. 

Chapter 4 is full of helpful advice on how to approach the challenge. For those of you 

interested in academic research, Appendix 2 has additional information on the topic. 

e SUPPORT YOUR IDEAS 

“If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.” 

 — Anonymous 

Often our communication goal involves persuasion. In such cases, throwing information 

at our audiences isn’t enough—we have to assemble and arrange our facts to support our 

position. Different kinds of information gathered during the research process can be used 

to form a logical argument. A logical argument is not a disagreement or a fight—it’s 

how we assemble information to make decisions and solve problems. 

At the same time we are trying to persuade others, others are trying to persuade us and 

not all their arguments are airtight. A logical fallacy is a weakness or failure in the logic 

of an argument. Chapter 5 describes logical arguments and several common logical 

fallacies—allowing you to recognize mistakes in other’s arguments and avoid them in 

your own. 

Building logical arguments are part of everyday life. We build arguments when we 

decide which new car to buy, who to nominate for a quarterly award or how we should 

spend our training budget. You’ll find that many of the ideas described in Chapter 5 are 

part of the way you think, even if you didn’t know the formal terminology. 

f ORGANIZE AND OUTLINE 

“Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it,

it’s not all mixed up.” 

 — Christopher Robin in A.A. Milne’s Winnie the Pooh 

You know your purpose and audience, you’ve done your homework—it’s time to deliver 

your message, right? Not so fast! Before starting to write sentences and paragraphs (or 

deliver your speech), you’ll save time and frustration by organizing your thoughts and 

developing an outline of how you are going to present your information. 

Successful communicators organize their material logically and in a sequence that leads 

their audience from one point to the next. Audiences often “tune out” a speaker or writer 

who rambles on without a logical pattern. Poorly organized essays are a common 

complaint in both civilian and military schools. Save yourself and your audience a lot of 

pain—read Chapter 6 to learn different patterns and techniques to organize and outline 

your material. 

FOCUS Principle #2 states that good communication should be organized so that the 

audience can efficiently understand your point. You’ve taken the first steps towards 

accomplishing this principle when you take the time to organize and outline your work 

before starting to write ... but how you actually draft and edit paragraphs will take you 

the rest of the way. 

– 11 –
The Tongue and Quill 

DRAFTING AND EDITING: 

WHEN THE FINGERS HIT THE KEYBOARD 

The first four steps are identical for both writing and speaking assignments, but the 

drafting and editing processes are somewhat different for the two forms of 

communication. In this section we’ll describe the steps from a writing perspective, and 

Chapters 9 and 10 will describe how the steps are adapted for Air Force speaking. 

g DRAFT 

“Writing is easy. All you do is stare at a blank sheet of paper until drops

of blood form on your forehead.” 

 — Gene Fowler 

When we think about the writing process, we immediately think of drafting sentences and 

paragraphs. If you’re uncomfortable with your writing skills, this step usually causes the 

most anxiety. The good news is that your work on Steps 1-4 will make the drafting 

process less painful and more efficient. 

Once you’ve completed the preliminaries and are ready to write, there are several 

practical ways to ensure you connect with your readers. 

• First, get to the point quickly—use one or more introductory paragraphs to state your 

purpose up front. Most Air Force readers don’t have the time or patience to read a staff 

paper written like a mystery novel with a surprise ending. 

• Second, organize your paragraphs so the readers know where you’re leading them, 

and use transitions to guide them along. 

• Third, make sure your sentences are clear and direct. Cut through the jargon and 

passive voice, use the right word for the job and don’t make them wade through an 

overgrown jungle of flowery words. 

• Finally, summarize your message in a concluding paragraph that connects all the dots 

and makes the message feel complete. 

Chapter 7 is full of practical advice on drafting, and it takes a top-down approach. It 

begins with preliminaries such as writing tone and formats, transitions to paragraph 

construction, provides practical tips on writing clear, vigorous sentences, then concludes 

with advice on overcoming writer’s block. 

h EDIT 

Experienced writers know that editing should be a separate, distinct process from

drafting. When you draft, you create something new. When you edit, you shift from

creator to critic. This change in roles can be tough, and no one wants to admit that his 

baby is ugly. Remember that criticism and judgment are inevitable in communication. 

The better you are at critically evaluating and correcting your own writing, the fewer 

people will be doing it for you. 

– 12 –
Seven Steps to Effective Communication

There are two important aspects of the editing process—WHAT you are editing for, and 

HOW to edit efficiently. What to edit for is simple—remember those FOCUS principles 

from Chapter 1? How to edit is a little more complicated, but we recommend starting 

with the big picture and working down to details like spelling and punctuation. 

Ironically, many people do just the opposite; they focus on details first. Some even think 

that editing is all about the details. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Though 

details are part of editing, they’re only part of the puzzle. 

i FIGHT FOR FEEDBACK AND GET APPROVAL 

“Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you’d have 

preferred to talk.” 

 — Doug Larson 

When you’ve completed the editing process and done what you can to improve your 

communication, it’s time to move outside yourself to get feedback. We are all limited in 

our ability to criticize our own work, and sometimes an outside opinion can help us see 

how to improve or strengthen our communication. Your objective is to produce the best 

possible product; don’t let pride of authorship and fear of criticism close your mind to 

suggestions from other people. Also, what we write or say at work often must be 

approved by our chain of command through a formal coordination process. Your 

supervisor needs to see it, the executive officer needs to see it, then the big boss, and so 

on.... Chapter 9 provides tips on how to give and receive feedback and how to manage 

the coordination process. 

SUMMARY 

In this chapter, we summarized a systematic process—Seven Steps to Effective 

Communication—that will help you achieve the five FOCUS principles. These steps 

will help you improve your writing and speaking products. Each step is described in 

greater detail in subsequent chapters. 

THE BASIC STEPS... FOR MORE DETAILS, REFER TO: 

1. Analyze Purpose and Audience Chapter 3 

2. Research Your Topic Chapter 4 

3. Support Your Ideas Chapter 5 

4. Organize and Outline Chapter 6 

5. Draft Chapter 7 (Writing); Chapter 11 (Speaking) 

6. Edit Chapter 8 (Writing); Chapter 11 (Speaking) 

7. Fight for Feedback and Approval Chapter 9 

– 13 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Thanks for 

the tip. 

A systematic approach helps 

when planning to write or

speak... check out the Seven 

Steps in The Tongue and Quill.

– 14 –
PART II: 

PREPARING TO WRITE AND 

SPEAK

– 15 –
Beautiful report—logical, 

well written... I just wish 

it covered what I 

needed... 

– 16 –
CHAPTER 3 

STEP 1: 

ANALYZING 

PURPOSE 

AND 

AUDIENCE

This chapter covers: 

• Evaluating purpose and emphasis in your communication. 

• Drafting a purpose statement. 

• Audience analysis—know yourself, your unit, and the audience. 

• Tips for success with your audience.

In Chapter 2, we introduced the Seven Steps for Effective Communication. Now we’re going to 

discuss the first of these steps in further detail. First and most importantly, you can save yourself 

a lot of work by asking yourself if the PowerPoint briefing, memo, meeting, e-mail, you name it, 

is going to help get the mission done or a task accomplished. In today’s fast-past work 

environment, we don’t need to create unnecessary work for anyone. 

– 17 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Once you’re clear on the need for communication, Step 1 requires you to get clear on your 

purpose and audience. As you’ll see in this chapter, these are not two distinct categories. The 

characteristics of your audience will influence all parts of your message, and your purpose often 

involves influencing your audience. 

KEY QUESTIONS 

Masters in the art of communication stay focused on their objective and approach audience 

analysis seriously. The more you know about your audience, the more comfortable you will feel 

writing that memo or delivering that briefing to the commander. Where do you start in this? 

Here are some questions to help you begin to analyze your purpose and audience and get you on 

the right track. We’ll discuss many of them in more detail later in the chapter. 

• What is the overall purpose of the communication? Are you trying to make a change in your 

audience? Are you writing just to inform your audience? 

• If you had one sentence or 30 seconds to explain your specific objective, what would you 

write or say?

• What format are you using to communicate? How much time do you have to prepare?

• Is there anything unusual about the time and place your audience will receive your 

communication? (i.e., is it 1600 on a Friday before a holiday weekend?) A lengthy informative email sent out late on a Friday afternoon may not be appreciated or even worse—not read! 

• Who will read this communication? Your boss? Your subordinates? Civilians? The 

answers will have a direct bearing on the tone and formality of your message. 

• What are the education levels, career fields and areas of expertise of your readers/listeners?

• Do you need to supply any background information, explanation of terms, or other 

information to your audience? Does your audience have experience with the ideas and concepts 

you are presenting? 

• What does the audience think of you? Are you known and trusted? 

• Is your audience motivated to hear/read your communication?

• Do you need to coordinate your communication? 

• Are you making promises your organization will have to keep?

– 18 – 
Analyzing Purpose and Audience 

WHAT IS MY PURPOSE? 

Most Air Force writing or speaking falls under one of the following purposes: to direct, inform,

persuade or inspire. Your task is to think about the message you want to send (the “what”) and 

make some sort of determination what your purpose is (the “why”). Some communication has 

primary and secondary purposes, so don’t kill yourself trying to make sure your message fits 

neatly in one of these categories. Once you decide the purpose, you’ll know where to place the 

emphasis and what the tone of your communication should be. Here’s a quick synopsis of these 

purposes and how they might work for you. 

• To Direct. Directive communication is generally used to pass on information describing 

actions you expect to be carried out by your audience. The emphasis in directive communication 

is clear, concise directions and expectations of your audience. 

• To Inform. The goal of informative communication is to pass on information to the 

audience. The communication is successful if the audience understands the message exactly the 

way the speaker or writer intended. The emphasis in informative communication is clear, direct

communication with accurate and adequate information tailored to the education and skill levels 

of the audience. Audience feedback and interaction may be appropriate in some situations to 

make sure they “got the message.” 

• To Persuade. Persuasive communication is typically used when you are trying to “sell” 

your audience on a new idea, new policy, new product or change in current operations. Though 

emotions are one tool of persuasion, most persuasive communication in the workplace requires 

convincing evidence put together in a logical way. Audience analysis is critical, because 

different audiences have different views on what evidence is convincing. Since the purpose is to 

guide your audience to a specific course of action, you cannot overlook tone and delivery. 

Chapter 5, Supporting Your Ideas, describes how to build your persuasive skills. 

• To Inspire. One final purpose for writing or speaking that doesn’t get much attention but is 

frequently used in the military is to inspire. As you climb the leadership ladder you will 

increasingly be requested to perform retirements, promotions, commander’s calls—opportunities 

where you will want to inspire the audience with your profound insight on someone’s career or

possibly your philosophy on leadership. Although protocol drives portions of these events, the 

opportunity to send a personal message and inspire the audience should not be overlooked. The 

emphasis in inspirational communication is delivery, a thorough knowledge of your topic and 

likewise your audience. 

Regardless of whether your mission is to inspire, direct, persuade or inform, there are general 

principles that apply to almost all communication. See “Tips for Success” at the end of this 

chapter to round out your portfolio for analyzing purpose and audience. 

– 19 –
The Tongue and Quill 

GET CLEAR ON YOUR BOTTOM LINE: DRAFTING A PURPOSE STATEMENT 

OK, we’re making progress. You have a feel for the general purpose of your communication (to 

direct, inform, persuade or inspire), but what is your “bottom line” you need to communicate to 

your audience? If you have difficulty nailing down your objective, your audience will be equally 

confused. 

One way to make sure you’re clear on your objective is to write a purpose statement, which is 

one sentence that captures the essence of what you’re trying to do—your “bottom line.” It’s the 

one sentence you’d keep if you were allowed only one. 

Developing a clear purpose statement will help you in two ways: 

• It will help you FOCUS as you develop your communication. 

• It will help your audience FOCUS when you deliver your message. 

Think about it; your audience wants a clear statement of your position and where you are going. 

This is especially true when your audience consists of higher-ranking individuals with many 

demands on their time and issues requiring their attention. 

Let’s look at some examples of draft purpose statements: 

Purpose Statement: To inform individuals in the Civil Engineering Squadron about new 

policies on hazardous waste disposal.

Purpose Statement: To encourage (inspire) at-risk high school students to work hard, stay in 

school and have hope in the future. 

Purpose Statement: To persuade the division chief to buy three laptops for use during official 

travel. 

As we’ll mention in Chapter 5, you may update your purpose statement after researching your 

topic. (For example, you might find out you need four laptops, not three.) Even if it isn’t locked 

down, a draft statement will help guide your research and support efforts. 

ANALYZING PURPOSE: OTHER ISSUES 

Knowing your “bottom line” is not the end of analyzing purpose. Here are some questions you 

want to ask to make sure you look at all parts of the equation. The answers will help refine your 

purpose and shape your entire project. 

• What format will I use to communicate? Today’s commanders are increasingly more 

vigilant of the value of their troops’ time—and their own. Make sure that the communication is 

required and that you select the most appropriate format for delivery. Think about how much 

time you will have to deliver your message before you go any further. Will you have 2 minutes 

in a staff meeting with the general that starts in 1 hour? One hour at your commander’s call next 

week? 

• How much time do I have to prepare my communication? The breadth and scope of a 

report your boss needs the next day will be different than a staff project due by the end of the 

fiscal year. What’s the suspense? How long is it going to take to write the report? Be sure to 

budget adequate time for all “Seven Steps,” especially “Researching your Topic” (Step 2), 

– 20 –
Analyzing Purpose and Audience 

“Drafting” (Step 5), and “Editing” (Step 6). If coordination is part of the master plan, it will also 

affect your timelines. 

There’s more to successful communication than getting clear on purpose. There’s always that 

human factor, and in the communication game that translates to analyzing your audience. 

AUDIENCE ANALYSIS: THE HUMAN FACTOR 

As stated in Chapter 1, all communication involves a sender, a message and an audience. “A” 

sends the message (either verbally or in writing) with a specific intended meaning to “B.” “B” 

receives the message, processes the message and attaches perceived meaning to the message. 

This is where it gets interesting. Did the intended message actually get to “B” (or not to “B”—

that is the question)? Was the perceived meaning what “A” intended? If not, why not? Ah, thus 

begins our journey into audience analysis. 

KNOW YOURSELF: Before you look around, you need to look in the mirror. Knowing your 

strengths and weaknesses will help you meet your communication goals. 

• Do you do better with certain communication formats than others? Be aware of your 

personal strengths. If you know that you’d rather be buried in a pile of fire ants than speak in 

public, you may choose to send your message in writing—if that’s an option. If not, spend some

time in Chapter 10 and improve your speaking skills! 

• Are you an inexperienced briefer that needs notes? If so, make sure they are written in a 

format that is easy to refer to while the general is listening intently and watching the beads of 

sweat form on your forehead. 

• Do you have expertise in the area? If so ... great! But don’t lose your audience with lots of 

lingo and unfamiliar jargon. You may think it’s cool; others may not. On the other hand, if you 

lack expertise in the area, you will need to focus your research to beef up on unfamiliar territory. 

Remember, there’s always someone in the crowd that knows as much or more—no pressure! 

• What is your relationship with the audience? Are you personally familiar with them? You 

may be able to present a more informal briefing or written document if you know this is 

acceptable to the audience. See the section on tone for more guidance. 

KNOW YOUR ORGANIZATION: Once you’ve taken a hard look at yourself, you need to 

take a look at your work environment and your organization. In the military we rarely act or 

speak in a vacuum. Often we represent our organization, unit or functional area and must 

understand them and accommodate their views, capabilities or concerns in our communications. 

The following questions may help bring things into focus. 

• Am I promising something my organization can deliver? (You can substitute boss or 

personnel for organization.) If not, why are you bothering?

• Is what I’m saying consistent with previous policy or operating philosophy? If not, you need 

to shift to a persuasive tone and explain why your approach warrants a change or breach in 

policy. 

– 21 –
The Tongue and Quill 

• Who needs to coordinate on this? Who else owns a piece of this action? The coordination 

game can be a mind maze, but if you leave a key player out, you will undoubtedly hear about it. 

KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE: The receiving audience falls into one of four sub-categories. 

Depending on the type of communication and coordination necessary, you may or may not deal 

with each and every one of these.

• Primary receiver: The person you directly communicate with either verbally or in writing. 

• Secondary receiver: People you indirectly communicate with through the primary 

receivers. Let’s say, for example, that you’re a group commander. You send a written memo to 

the unit’s first sergeants (primary receivers) identifying establishments near your base that are 

now designated “off limits” to the troops. The first sergeants post these areas in the squadron 

orderly rooms for “widest dissemination.” The secondary receivers would be the troops that read 

(and hopefully heed!) the commander’s directive. 

• Key decision makers: These are the most powerful members of the audience ... the ones 

that really make the decisions. Knowing who they are will help focus your attention and 

potentially your delivery in larger briefings and certain written communication. 

• Gatekeepers: These are people in the chain that typically review the communication before 

it reaches your intended audience. Knowing who they are and what their expectations are can 

save you embarrassment and help ensure your success in the long run. We all know that 

administrative assistants are keenly aware of their bosses’ preferences. Listen to their inputs! 

“Therefore I say: Know the enemy and know yourself; in a hundred battles you will never

be in peril. When you are ignorant of the enemy but know yourself, your chances of 

winning or losing are equal. If ignorant of your enemy and of yourself, you are certain in

every battle to be in peril.” 

 — Sun Tzu 

Sun Tzu was ahead of his time. He knew the importance of audience analysis! We’re not 

recommending you view your audience as “the enemy,” but Sun Tzu had the right idea. Read on 

for some final tips for connecting with your audience. 

– 22 –
Analyzing Purpose and Audience 

TIPS FOR SUCCESS WITH YOUR AUDIENCE 

• RANK—don’t be afraid of it. Differences in military rank can be a real barrier to 

communication in the Air Force. Too many of us become tongue-tied when communicating with 

those senior in rank, and cursory or impatient with those who are junior in rank. We must 

constantly remind ourselves we are all communicative equals and should strive to be candid, 

direct and respectful with everyone. 

• JARGON—tailor to your audience. Don’t overestimate the knowledge/expertise of your 

readers, but don’t talk down to them either. Be careful with excessive use of career-field specific 

jargon and acronyms. Yes, they are second nature to most of us in the military, but you can lose 

your audience with unfamiliar terminology.

• Be INCLUSIVE—remember our diverse force. Sometimes we inadvertently exclude 

members of our audience by falling into communication traps involving references to race, 

religion, ethnicity or sex. Remember this concept when designing your visual support. Your 

visual aids should show a range of people who represent our Air Force. Avoid traditional 

stereotyping of jobs based on sex or race. Inclusiveness also applies to humor. Humor is not 

universal, and joke telling is the biggest area where otherwise sensitive people unknowingly get 

themselves into trouble. Knowing your audience and adhering to good taste and sensitivity will 

keep you in check.

• TONE—it’s not just what you say, it’s how you say it. Closely tied to the purpose of your 

communication is the tone you take with your audience. Speakers have gestures, voice and 

movements to help them communicate. Writers only have words on paper. How many times 

have you seen colleagues get bent out of shape over a misunderstood 

e-mail? Why? Because the nonverbal signals available during face-to-face communication are 

absent. Recognize this disadvantage in written communication and pay close attention to it. 

Words that carry uncomplimentary insinuations (ignorant, opinionated) make negative 

suggestions (failure, impossible) or call up unpleasant thoughts (liable, unsuccessful) can 

potentially defeat your purpose. 

• COURTESY—be polite (please!). The first rule of writing is to be polite. Forego anger, 

criticism and sarcasm—strive to be reasonable and persuasive. Try not to deliberately embarrass 

someone if it can be avoided with a more tactful choice of words. Rudeness is a weak person’s 

imitation of strength. 

• Make it PERSONAL—but it’s not all about you! When appropriate, use pronouns to 

create instant rapport, show concern and keep your reader involved. Using pronouns also keeps 

your writing from being monotonous, dry and abstract. The pronouns you’ll probably use the 

most are you, yours, we, us and our. Use I, me, and my sparingly. One rule of business writing 

is “put your audience first,” so when possible, avoid using I as the first word of an opening 

sentence and avoid starting two sentences in a row with we or I unless you’re trying to hammer 

home a point. These guidelines will help you to avoid sounding self-centered and repetitive. 

• Be POSITIVE. To cultivate a positive tone, give praise where praise is due; acknowledge 

acceptance before focusing on additional improvements; and express criticism in the form of 

helpful questions, suggestions, requests, recommendations, or clear directives rather than 

accusations. When having to give bad news, lead with a neutral comment before jumping in 

with the bad news. Save the positive for the closing by offering alternatives, etc. Stay away 

– 23 –
The Tongue and Quill 

from using clichés, restating the refusal, hiding bad news in a fog of wordiness and inappropriate 

apologizing. Your audience always appreciates sincerity and honesty. To get you started 

thinking “positive,” listen for the tone of the following sentences: 

Commanders will recommend only qualified persons for training. [Constructive]

Commanders may not recommend for training any person who is not qualified. [Destructive] 

Positive Negative 

reception area waiting room

established policy old policy 

change of schedule postponement

confirm meeting reminder 

competition is keen opportunity is limited

start writing well stop writing badly

use the big hoist don’t use the small hoist

the cup is half full the cup is half empty 

• FORMAL (“To be, or not to be”) versus INFORMAL (“hey dude”). Different

communication situations require different levels of formality. The informal tone is more like a 

conversation between you and your reader, and it is characterized by clear, direct, active 

language. In today’s Air Force, most of your writing will be informal, though ceremonies and 

awards may require more elaborate (formal) language. Whether your tone is formal or informal, 

you still need to follow the accepted rules of grammar. In any case, the best advice is to keep 

your writing clear, concise and simple. We’ll cover this in more detail under “drafting clear and 

concise sentences” in Chapter 7. 

SUMMARY 

This chapter covered the key concepts of analyzing your purpose and audience—the first step 

towards developing effective communication. Getting clear on your purpose early in the process 

helps you focus your preparation. Taking the time to understand your audience will help you 

tailor your message to their knowledge, interests and motives. Once you’ve determined your 

purpose, nailed down your purpose statement, and carefully analyzed your audience, you need to 

do some homework on your topic... 

...it’s called R-E-S-E-A-R-C-H. 

– 24 –
CHAPTER 4 

STEP 2: 

RESEARCHING 

YOUR TOPIC 

This chapter covers: 

• Things to think about before getting lost in the library. 

• Where to go to get information. 

• Internet searches. 

• Tips for evaluating sources. 

• A list of useful references for Air Force personnel. 

Whether your communication goal is to persuade or inform, you’ll need more than fancy 

words to win the day—you’ll need substance as well as style. Once you’re clear on your 

purpose and audience (Step 1), you’ll need to research your topic to uncover information 

that will support your communication goals. 

In some ways, research has never been easier—electronic databases and the Internet give 

us access to quantities of information unthinkable 20 years ago. But new opportunities 

bring new challenges. With so much information, how do we find the data we need to 

meet our purpose? And how do we know a source should be trusted? This chapter gives 

some basic suggestions that will be useful in nearly any assignment. 

– 25 –
The Tongue and Quill 

BEFORE YOU HIT THE LIBRARY 

Okay—you need to research your topic ... 

how do you approach the task? If you do a 

little early planning, you’ll be more focused 

and effective when searching for data. 

For simple projects, planning means spend a 

few quiet moments thinking about your task. 

For longer projects, you may write out a 

detailed research plan. Regardless of the 

scope, think through these issues: 

• Review the purpose and scope of the 

overall project. 

After completing Step 1, Analyzing Purpose 

and Audience, you should have a good idea of 

what you need, but sometimes your purpose 

and scope may evolve as you learn more about the topic. You may also need to do some

preliminary research just to get smart enough to scope out the effort. If you’ve been 

handed a vague topic, try to get some feel for how far you should go in your research, 

what you can realistically do, and where you should stop. 

Chapter scope and related sections 

The word “research” is often used to 

describe a multistep investigation process 

used to either answer a question or solve a

problem. Academic research expands

knowledge by finding answers to

questions, while nearly all military staff 

research revolves around identifying and 

solving problems. This chapter

emphasizes information retrieval and 

evaluation of sources, and will not

describe the end-to-end process associated 

with academic research (which is covered 

in Appendix 2), or details of systematic 

problem solving (which is described in the 

Military Staff Study chapter).

• Assign yourself a deadline for the research effort. 

It’s easy to get lost in the research process. Don’t do an outstanding job of data retrieval, 

then a marginal job on the presentation because you ran out of time. For larger projects, 

assign yourself a time budget for the data-gathering process. 

• Ask the boss—Are there unusual sources or knowledgeable individuals you 

should seek out? 

Your boss gave you this research problem for a reason—he or she thought that you were 

capable of finding the answer. Even if you can eventually find the answer on your own, 

you might save some time by asking for suggestions on where to start. An early vector 

could be particularly helpful if you’re working on a practical problem that’s “local,” 

specialized, or requires information that isn’t available to the general public. 

• How much do I know about this topic and what are my biases? 

Before you look for answers outside yourself, look in the mirror first. You may have 

valuable knowledge about an assigned research project, but you need to acknowledge and 

guard against your own biases in working a research problem. It’s tough to keep an 

unbiased attitude; in fact, it’s probably impossible if you know anything about the subject 

in question. The good news is once you realize you may be biased, you’ll be less likely to 

automatically dismiss data that’s not consistent with your personal philosophy. 

– 26 –
Researching Your Topic 

WHERE SHOULD I LOOK FOR INFORMATION, AND WHERE DO I START? 

Three things will probably influence how you approach the data gathering process:

• Your research topic. 

• Your experience as a researcher, and your expertise in this research area. 

• Your experience with Internet and electronic database searches. 

If you are seeking information that’s publicly available and are comfortable with 

electronic search tools, you’d probably start with the Internet. If you are dealing with a 

local problem, a sensitive topic, or feel uncomfortable with the research process or search 

technology, you’ll probably want to start by talking to another person. Regardless of the 

order you approach them, here are four major categories of information: 

c COWORKERS AND BASE PERSONNEL that you can easily meet face-to-face 

may be subject matter experts on your topic. They may also know where you can get 

valuable information on local projects, even if they are not subject matter experts 

themselves. The person who gave you the research assignment may also be a resource. 

Get clear on the big picture and be specific when you ask others for information—you’ll 

save everybody’s time. 

d YOUR OFFICE FILES AND REFERENCES, both in paper form and on your 

computer network, may be valuable sources of information. We haven’t totally evolved 

to a paperless workplace, but in most offices, a great deal of current information on 

policies and procedures is contained on the office computer network. Paper files are still 

used for correspondence, sensitive information and older archives. Each office has its 

own policies—check them out. 

In addition to office files, larger units typically produce unit histories that can be very 

useful for staff research. They tell what happened, when it happened, why it happened 

and where it happened. A good history also shows how past experiences relate to current 

plans and how recent experiences relate to future plans. 

e THE INTERNET—Become an instant expert on anything without leaving your 

chair! The amount of information available from your desktop computer has exploded 

over the last decade. The web can be intimidating for those who didn’t grow up with 

computers, but set your fears aside—the payoffs are enormous. The two biggest 

challenges in using the Internet are (1) finding the information you need, and (2) sorting 

out what you can believe and what you can’t. Remember—anyone with an ax to grind 

can build a web site, and there’s no one out there checking to see if the facts are even 

remotely correct. It’s an interesting environment—information ranges from official, 

credible sources to the lunatic fringe, and web sites may appear and disappear without 

notice. Later in this chapter, we’ll give you details on searching the net and evaluating 

what you find. 

– 27 –
The Tongue and Quill 

f THE LIBRARY—Libraries have unique benefits for the researcher: 

• Librarians (real, honest-to-goodness humans!) who can help you find information and 

give basic research advice. 

• Free access to books and periodicals—most of which aren’t available on the Internet. 

• Free access to the Internet and electronic databases. 

• Interlibrary loans that let you get at nearly any book in print—even at small libraries 

Though the Internet is a convenient source of information, a great deal of information 

needed for serious research is not on the Internet—it’s still found in books and 

periodicals. Libraries purchase these sources, and then give you free access to them. 

Isn’t America great? 

Someone other than the author has critically reviewed most information you find in a 

library. The end result is less trash and outright errors than you find out on the Internet. 

Public libraries are available in most bases and cities ... and don’t forget about your local 

college or university! Even if you can’t borrow books, many of them allow nonstudents 

to visit and read books. 

“Virtual libraries” are another important resource—they’re web sites that give you access 

to several library resources. Though these can be reached through an Internet browser, 

the information meets the same quality standards as the material in the physical library. 

Air University Library’s World Wide Web page—PortAUL—is an example of a virtual 

library that contains several on-line research tools and traditional library resources. They 

include access to search engines, full-text bibliographies, online library assistance, fulltext periodicals, relevant research links and assignment assistance for the Professional 

Military Education (PME) schools located at Maxwell Air Force Base. PortAUL is 

available online at http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/aul.htm. 

HOW CAN I ACCESS THE INTERNET TO GATHER DATA FOR MY RESEARCH? 

• For the computer phobic: the absolute minimum you need to know. 

There is nothing to fear but fear itself. But seriously, accessing the Internet is easy ...

even if you don’t want to spend any time learning about it. If someone gives you a web 

site address, just open your Internet browser software and type it in exactly as it is given. 

If you DON’T know exactly what you want, you’ll need to use a search engine to find 

web sites that have useful information. Search engines use key words and phrases to 

search the Internet. Some allow you to type in questions, and most have catalogues that 

sort a limited number of sites by topic. 

One popular and user-friendly search tool worth mentioning is Google. To get to Google, 

simply type www.google.com into your Internet browser. Once you are at the site, type 

in a few words or phrases that describe the main concepts of a topic. Google only returns 

web pages that contain all the words you type in, making it easy to refine or narrow your 

search. 

• Refining your keyword searches to improve search efficiency. 

– 28 –
Researching Your Topic 

Once you’re comfortable with the Internet, you may want to learn some tricks to improve 

your search efficiency. 

Use “and” or the plus symbol “+” to make sure that your search engine gives you pages 

that have all the words you enter. For example, either of these searches will keep you 

away from sites that describe military aviation, but not military aviation accidents. 

Military AND aviation AND accidents 

Military+aviation+accidents 

Use “not” or the minus symbol “-” to eliminate sites with unrelated words that clutter 

your search. For example, if you’re looking for Windows 95 information but keep 

getting Windows 98 or Windows 3.1 sites, you can eliminate them by using the following 

search: 

Windows -98 -3.1 

Fun fact: The words AND,

OR and NOT, when used

between keywords in a 

database search, are called 

Boolean operators. Boolean 

operators were developed in

the 1800s by George Boole,

an English mathematician. 

Boolean operators are

heavily used in the design of

electronic circuits.

Windows NOT 98 NOT 3.1

The Google search engine requires a space before the 

minus sign.

Using Quotation Marks (“ ”) to get web sites that have 

your search words in the order you specify. For example, 

“Operation Desert Storm”

gives a much tighter search than 

Operation+Desert+Storm

Combining Operations: Once you’ve got the basics down, you can combine operations. 

For example: 

“Operation Desert Storm” AND “Air Operations” 

gives you relevant sites on the war in the air. If you don’t want to hear about Gulf War 

Syndrome, you can subtract it out: 

“Operation Desert Storm” + “Air Operations” – “gulf war syndrome” 

Internet searches require some judgment. If you don’t use enough keywords to narrow 

your topic, you’ll end up spending a lot of time scanning sites and trying to find the ones 

that are most relevant. On the other hand, a tightly focused search might overlook a 

relevant citation. There are no easy answers, but through trial and error you’ll probably 

find the balance that works for your particular topic. 

Search Engine Options. If you’re having trouble finding material on your topic, you 

might try more than one search engine. Different search engines may yield different 

results, and some specialize in certain fields of study. To find out more details, do an 

Internet search for current rankings and recommendations. 

Though anything on the web is subject to change, here are some of the top rated search 

engines at the time of publication: Google, Alltheweb.com (fast), Yahoo, MSN Search, 

Lycos, Ask Jeeves, AOL Search, Teoma, Wisenut, Altavista and Netscape Search. 

– 29 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Specialized Military Search Engines. Several search engines located on the Internet are 

tailored to search for military and government information. FirstGov, Jane’s Defence 

Discovery Search, Searchmil.com and Google!Unclesam may be useful for such topics. 

Call’s Military Domain Search Engine (http://call-search.leavenworth.army.mil/) also 

searches multiple military related sites, including CALL, Army, Army Field Manuals, 

Army regulations, Corps of Engineers, Early Bird, Joint Service, Mitre Corp., NATO, 

Navy, Rand, USAF, USCG, and USMC sites. 

Metasearch Engines. Meta search engines search other search engines. Since they 

often search smaller, less well-known search engines and specialized sites, they are a 

good choice if you are struggling to find relevant materials on your topic. Again, 

consider an Internet search to find out if one of these engines specializes in your field of 

interest. Flipper, Iboogie, Infogrid, Infonetware Real term search, Ithaki, Ixquick, 

Kartoo, Profusion, Qbsearch, Query Srver, Searchonline, Vivisimo, Dogpile, Excite, 

Metacrawler and Webcrawler. 

EVALUATING THE QUALITY OF INTERNET SOURCES 

Once you’ve found web sites on your topic, you need to decide which ones to take 

seriously. Some feel that a positive attitude is key to success in life, but in the case of the 

Internet, your attitude should be deep suspicion unless the source is official and you can 

confirm the site is what it pretends to be. There are lots of credible web sources with a 

known pedigree (the Air University Library, for example), but there are also many sites 

that are either factually incorrect or deliberately misleading. 

When looking at a web site, ask yourself some questions. Who is responsible for the web 

site, and can you confirm that? How distant are the authors from the “event” they are 

writing about? (See page 32 for a description of primary, secondary and tertiary sources.) 

What are the authors’ motives? Are they part of a group whose goal is to influence 

public opinion or to sell you something? Are there things about the site that make you 

question its accuracy, objectivity or currency? Take a look at the checklist on the next 

page for more specifics to add to your paranoia. 

Another way to build confidence in the information you gather is to seek confirmation of 

the facts from multiple sources. The weaker the source, the more important it is to get a 

second opinion before believing it. Most of us instinctively do this in the workplace—we 

have a very short list of people we absolutely believe every time they open their mouths 

(these folks usually don’t talk much!), we have a longer list of people who are right most 

of the time, and then there’s usually one or two who have no credibility whatsoever. If 

the issue is important and you want to be sure, try to get the answer in stereo. 

The less you know about a topic, the more authoritative the

sources sound. 

— Quill Law of Research

– 30 –
Researching Your Topic 

– 31 –

How to Recognize an Informational Web Page 

An informational web page is one whose purpose is to present factual information. The URL Address

frequently ends in .edu or .gov, as many of these pages are sponsored by educational institutions or 

government agencies. 

Examples: Dictionaries, thesauri, directories, transportation schedules, calendars of events, statistical

data, and other factual information such as reports, presentations of research or information about a 

topic. 

Questions to Ask About the Web Page

NOTE: The greater number of questions listed below answered “yes,” the more likely it is you can 

determine whether the source is of high information quality. 

Criterion #1: AUTHORITY 

Is it clear who is responsible for the contents of the page? 

Is there a link to a page describing the purpose of the sponsoring organization? 

Is there a way of verifying the legitimacy of the page’s sponsor? That is, is there a phone number or

postal address to contact for more information? (Simply an e-mail address is not enough.) 

Is it clear who wrote the material and are the author’s qualifications for writing on this topic clearly 

stated? 

If the material is protected by copyright, is the name of the copyright holder given? 

Criterion #2: ACCURACY 

Are the sources for any factual information clearly listed so they can be verified in another source? 

Is the information free of grammatical, spelling, and typographical errors? (These kinds of errors not 

only indicate a lack of quality control, but can actually produce inaccuracies in information.) 

Is it clear who has the ultimate responsibility for the accuracy of the content of the material? 

If there are charts and graphs containing statistical data, are they clearly labeled and easy to read? 

Criterion #3: OBJECTIVITY

Is the information provided as a public service? 

Is the information free of advertising? 

If there is any advertising on the page, is it clearly differentiated from the informational content?

Criterion #4: CURRENCY

Are there dates on the page to indicate the following: 

When the page was written? 

When the page was first placed on the web? 

When the page was last revised?

Are there any other indications that the material is kept current?

If material is presented in graphs and/or charts, is it clearly stated when the data was gathered?

If the information is published in different editions, is it clearly labeled what edition the page is from?

Criterion #5: COVERAGE 

Is there an indication that the page has been completed, and is not still under construction?

If there is a print equivalent to the web page, is there a clear indication of whether the entire work is 

available on the Web or only parts of it? 

If the material is from a work which is out of copyright (as is often the case with a dictionary or 

thesaurus) has there been an effort to update the material to make it more current? 

NOTE: This checklist is the original Web version. The authors’ book Web Wisdom: How to Evaluate 

and Create Information Quality on the Web contains a revised and expanded version. Copyrighted by

Jan Alexander and Marsha Ann Tate 1996-1999. 
The Tongue and Quill 

PRIMARY, SECONDARY AND TERTIARY SOURCES: HOW CLOSE IS A 

SOURCE TO WHAT IT REPORTS? 

When evaluating a source, one factor to consider is the distance between the writer and 

his or her subject. Since people and their research are often misquoted, it’s better to refer 

back to original material than rely on someone else’s interpretation of existing work. 

This is true for research published in books and print journals, as well as Internet sites. 

The material you find can be classified as either a primary, secondary or tertiary source. 

A primary source is a first-hand account of an historical event, a physical artifact or 

record of that event or a description of research written by the people that actually 

performed it. 

A secondary source is one step removed from the event or research. It documents the 

findings of someone else who took the time to review primary sources. 

A tertiary source summarizes findings published in secondary sources. 

Let’s look at some examples. If you were doing research on a friendly fire incident, 

primary sources would include interviews of the parties involved, radio recordings, gun 

camera footage and black box recordings. The Summary of Official Findings published 

by the investigation board would be a secondary source. A tertiary source might be a 

magazine article that quoted the Summary of Official Findings as part of a larger 

discussion on the topic. 

If you wanted to learn about the foundations of logic and persuasion in Western culture, a 

primary source would be essays on the subject by the Greek philosopher Aristotle, a 

secondary source would be an academic textbook that refers back to these writings, and a 

tertiary source would be a lecture given by an instructor that used the academic textbook 

as a reference. 

In general, primary and secondary sources are considered more reliable than tertiary 

sources. Each level of interpretation can introduce potential errors or bias, and ideas can 

be misquoted or quoted out of context. On the other hand, sometimes a tertiary source 

might be useful to get a “big picture view” of a topic before you start slogging through 

primary sources and secondary sources. 

A List of Useful Resource Sources 

In some situations, you may want to start your research by referring to one authoritative 

and relevant source instead of searching the library or Internet for all possible sources of 

information. This might be particularly useful for staff research, or for situations where 

you want a quick and official answer to a relatively noncontroversial topic. We’ll 

conclude this chapter with a list of sources that are either “official” in nature or involve

publications that include at least one layer of critical review. 

– 32 –
Researching Your Topic 

AIR FORCE SOURCES 

AIR FORCE LINK. http://www.af.mil/

The official web site of the US Air Force. It provides the latest news, information about careers, a library 

(of public web sites) and an image gallery. It provides information about the Department of the Air Force, 

the Pentagon, the Unified Combatant Commands, the Air Force Reserve and the Air National Guard. 

There are links to other related sites including the full text of the report Air Force Vision 2020 and the

electronic journal Airman Magazine. 

AIR FORCE PORTAL. https://www.my.af.mil/gcss-af/afp40/USAF/ep/home.do

The Air Force portal is a new initiative put forth that combines a number of Air Force web sites and 

computer systems into one common interface. Individuals must register and establish an account. 

AIR FORCE PUBLICATIONS. http://www.e-publishing.af.mil

The full-text of most standard Air Force publications. See Part VI, Air Force Publications. 

AIR FORCE HISTORICAL RESEARCH AGENCY. http://www.au.af.mil/au/afhra/

This agency’s holdings consist of over 70,000,000 pages devoted to the history of the United States Air 

Force. Research requests can be submitted at: http://www.maxwell.af.mil/au/afhra/contact.html

AIR FORCE RESOURCE CENTER. http://www.petersons.com/airforce 

Educational and career information for both current Air Force personnel and potential recruits. Search for 

educational information, search for career guidance information, view news and articles and access a 

collection of Air Force links. 

AIR UNIVERSITY LIBRARY’S WORLD WIDE WEB PAGE—PORTAUL. 

http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/aul.htm 

Air University Library’s World Wide Web page contains several on-line research tools and traditional

library resources. Resources on the web page include access to search engines, full-text bibliographies, 

online library assistance, full-text periodicals, relevant research links and assignment assistance for AWC,

SOS, SNCOA, ACSC and other PME schools located at Maxwell AFB. Research requests can be

submitted at: http://www.maxwell.af.mil/au/aul/forms/refform.htm

AIR UNIVERSITY PRESS. http://www.maxwell.af.mil/au/aul/aupress 

The AU Press publication program is designed primarily to help war fighters and policy makers understand

and apply air and space power in peacetime and conflict. Air University Press publishes books, 

monographs and research papers by military authors and civilian scholars. 

AIR UNIVERSITY STUDENT RESEARCH PAPERS. https://www.research.au.af.mil

Includes over 2,000 full-text publications by faculty and students, summaries of AU research and 

prospective topics for research. Includes ACSC, AFFP, AFIT, AWC, CADRE and SAAAS papers. 

AIR WAR COLLEGE (AWC) GATEWAY TO INTERNET RESOURCES. 

http://www.au.af.mil/au/awc/awcgate/awcgate.htm

This site includes links organized for topics such as USAF Counterproliferation Center, Center for Strategy

and Technology, International/Regional Studies, Issues, Forces, and Capabilities, Information Operations, 

Special Operations, Space Operations and Systems, Military and Space Doctrine, Strategy and Military 

Theory, Military Education On-line, Education and Technology, Future Studies, Visioning and Strategic 

Planning, Military Medicine and Health and Fitness. 

INTERNET SEARCHING TOOLS (AND TIPS). http://www.au.af.mil/au/awc/awcgate/awc-srch.htm

This site includes links helpful for anyone wishing to improve their Internet research skills. 

– 33 –
The Tongue and Quill 

OTHER SERVICES 

US ARMY. http://www.army.mil/ 

ArmyLink is the official web site of the US Army. It provides the latest news, as well as information about 

careers, a library (of public web sites) and an image gallery. 

US ARMY PUBLICATIONS. http://www.usapa.army.mil/ 

The full-text of most standard Army publications.

US ARMY MILITARY HISTORY INSTITUTE. http://carlislewww.army.mil/usamhi/1collectionoverviewsubheaders.html

USAMHI collects, organizes, preserves, and makes available source materials on American military history 

to the defense community, academic researchers and the public. Research requests can be submitted at: 

http://carlisle-www.army.mil/usamhi/1inquiries.html

US COAST GUARD. http://www.uscg.mil/ 

The official web site of the US Coast Guard. It provides the latest news, as well as information about 

careers, a library (of public web sites) and an image gallery. 

US COAST GUARD PUBLICATIONS. http://www.uscg.mil/hq/g-s/g-si/g-sii/sii-3/sii-3.htm 

The full-text of most standard Coast Guard publications. 

US MARINE CORPS. http://www.uscg.mil/

MarineLink is the official web site of the US Marine Corps. It provides the latest news, as well as 

information about careers, a library (of public web sites) and an image gallery. 

US MARINE CORPS PUBLICATIONS. http://www.hqmc.usmc.mil/pubs.nsf

The full-text of most standard Marine publications.

US MARINE CORPS HISTORY AND MUSEUMS DIVISION. http://www.usmc.mil 

The official United States Marine Corps History and Museums Division web site. This site provides a

variety of information about the division and most importantly on the histories and traditions of the United 

States Marine Corps. 

US NAVY. http://www.navy.mil/

The official web site of the US Navy. It provides the latest news, as well as information about careers, a 

library (of public web sites) and an image gallery. 

US NAVY DIRECTIVES. http://www.navy.mil/ 

The full-text of most standard Navy directives.

US NAVAL HISTORICAL CENTER. http://www.history.navy.mil/ 

The Naval Historical Center is the official history program of the Department of the Navy. It includes a

museum, art gallery, research library, archives and curator as well as research and writing programs.

NATIONAL GUARD. http://www.defenselink.mil/faq/pis/grdres.html 

GuardLink is the official web site of the National Guard. It provides the latest news, as well as information 

about careers, a library (of public web sites) and an image gallery. 

RESERVE AFFAIRS. http://www.defenselink.mil/ra/

The official web site for reserve affairs. It provides the latest news, as well as information about careers, a 

library (of public web sites) and an image gallery. 

– 34 –
Researching Your Topic 

DOD SOURCES 

DEFENSE ACQUISITION DESKBOOK. http://deskbook.dau.mil/jsp/default.jsp 

The Defense Acquisition Deskbook is an electronic reference library that provides the most current 

acquisition policy for the Military Services and Agencies. The Deskbook is free-of-charge and is available 

as a CD-ROM subscription and as a web edition. 

DEFENSELINK. http://www.defenselink.mil/

DefenseLINK is the official web site for the Department of Defense and the starting point for finding US

military information online. It contains links to publications, statements, etc. 

DEFENSE TECHNICAL INFORMATION CENTER (DTIC). http://stinet.dtic.mil/

DTIC is the central point for the Defense Department’s collections of research and development in virtually

all fields of science and technology. DTIC documents defense-related research, development, test and 

evaluation (RDT&E) activities. The DTIC Scientific and Technical Information Network provides access 

to all unclassified, unlimited document citations added into DTIC from December 1974 to the present. 

Descriptive summaries and full text information are also available for some documents. 

EARLYBIRD. http://ebird.afis.osd.mil 

A daily, concise compilation of the most current published news articles and commentary concerning the 

most significant defense and defense-related national security issues. Access restricted to DoD personnel. 

JOINT ELECTRONIC LIBRARY. http://www.dtic.mil/doctrine/index.html 

Joint Electronic Library (JEL) provides access to full text copies of Joint Publications, the Department of 

Defense Dictionary, Service Publications, History Publications, CJCS Directives, research papers and other

publications. It also includes the Joint Force Quarterly and A Common Perspective.

JOINT WARFIGHTING CENTER ELECTRONIC RESEARCH LIBRARY. 

http://elib1.jwfc.js.mil/main/index.htm 

Provides access to documents on Peace Operations, Future Joint Operations, Joint Publications, 

Consequence Management, as well as research papers. Individuals must register and establish an account. 

MERLN. http://merln.ndu.edu/ 

On the Internet since 1990, MERLN provides indexing to significant articles, news items, editorials and

book reviews appearing in military and aeronautical periodicals, many of which are not indexed elsewhere. 

MERLN also provides access to the major library catalogs of several PME schools. 

THE NATIONAL ARCHIVES AND RECORDS ADMINISTRATION (NARA). 

http://www.archives.gov/ 

An independent federal agency that preserves our nation’s history and defines us as a people by overseeing 

the management of all federal records. 

– 35 –
The Tongue and Quill 

MILITARY BIBLIOGRAPHIES 

MILITARY BIBLIOGRAPHIES. A bibliography is a great starting point for research. A librarian has 

examined many relevant sources and compiled a listing of Internet sites, books, documents, magazine 

articles and videos. Many bibliographies are done on various topics by different military libraries or

groups. Some of the most useful are:

• Air University Library Bibliographies. http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/bibs/bib97.htm 

• Joint Forces Staff College Library. http://www.jfsc.ndu.edu/library/bibliography/bibs.htm 

• Marine Corps University Research Center. http://www.mcu.usmc.mil/MCRCweb/library/library.htm

• National Defense University Library. http://www.ndu.edu/library/pubs.html#bibliographies 

• Naval Postgraduate School. http://library.nps.navy.mil/home/bibliogs.htm 

• US Army Military History Institute. 

http://carlisle-www.army.mil/usamhi/FindingAids.html 

• US Army War College Library. http://www.carlisle.army.mil/library/bibliographies.htm 

MILITARY NEWSPAPER AND MAGAZINE INDEXES AND LISTS 

Some indexes listed below require a paid subscription. Contact your local or base library for availability. 

AIR UNIVERSITY LIBRARY INDEX TO MILITARY PERIODICALS (AULIMP). 

http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/muir1/aulimp1.htm 

AULIMP contains citations to articles in English language military journals. Air University Library (AUL) 

has been producing AULIMP since 1949, and material after 1989 is available on the web.

DOD AND MILITARY ELECTRONIC JOURNALS. 

http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/periodicals/dodelecj.htm 

An electronic list compiled and maintained by the staff of the AUL. 

READ MILITARY NEWS. http://www.au.af.mil/au/aul/periodicals/milnews.htm 

A listing of defense and military service news including base newspapers compiled and maintained by

AUL. 

STAFF COLLEGE AUTOMATED MILITARY PERIODICALS INDEX (SCAMPI). 

http://merln.ndu.edu/

Developed to support the curriculum of the Armed Forces Staff College; provides selected citations to

journal articles and selected documents and reports. Subject, author and keyword indexing is provided. 

OTHER MAGAZINE AND NEWS INDEXES 

Some indexes listed below require a paid subscription. Contact your local or base library for availability. 

ACCESS NEWS. http://infoweb.newsbank.com/ 

Provides news articles covering social, economic, environmental, government, sports, health, science and 

military issues and events from more than 500 US regional and national newspapers and wire services, and

140 full-text general news, subject-specific and military magazines. Paid subscription required. 

– 36 –
Researching Your Topic 

ACCESS SCIENCE. http://www.accessscience.com/server-java/Arknoid/science/AS 

Provides on-line access to the McGraw-Hill Encyclopedia of Science and Technology, including 7,100+

articles, 115,000 dictionary terms, and hundreds of Research Updates—in all areas of science and 

technology—updated daily, plus these great features: Over 2,000 in-depth biographies of leading scientists 

through history; weekly updates on breakthroughs and discoveries in the world of science and technology;

resources to guide your research; and links to web sites for further research. Paid subscription required. 

AEROSPACE and HIGH TECHNOLOGY DATABASE. http://alt3.csa3.com/

An abstracting and indexing service covering the world’s publishing literature in the field of aeronautics 

and space science and technology. Paid subscription required. 

AMERICA HISTORY AND LIFE. http://serials.abc-clio.com/ 

A comprehensive bibliography of articles on the history and culture of the United States and Canada from

prehistory to the present. Paid subscription required. 

AIR FORCE TIMES AND OTHER TIMES PUBLICATIONS. Provides full-text access to Army

Times, Air Force Times, Navy Times, and the Marine Corps Times and includes current issues and 

archives from 2000-2003. Paid subscription required for full access. 

• Army Times. http://www.armytimes.com/ 

• Air Force Times. http://www.airforcetimes.com/ 

• Navy Times. http://www.navytimes.com/ 

• Marine Corps Times. http://www.marinetimes.com/

COUNTRYWATCH. http://www.countrywatch.com/ip/default.asp

Provides the political, economic, corporate and environmental trends for each of the 191 countries around 

the world. In addition, Country Wire provides a global news service. Paid subscription required. 

CQ LIBRARY. CQ Weekly: http://library2.cqpress.com/cqweekly/

CQ RESEARCHER. http://library.cqpress.com/cqresearcher/ 

Provides access to CQ Weekly and the CQ Researcher. CQ Weekly on the Web includes access to the full 

text of all articles published since 1983. CQ Researcher is a weekly publication that covers the most 

current and controversial issues of the day with complete summaries, insight into all sides of the issues, 

bibliographies and more. Paid subscription required. 

EBSCOHOST. http://search.epnet.com/ 

A web-based periodical index that provides abstracts and indexing for over 4,800 scholarly journals

covering the social sciences, military science, humanities, education and more. Also included is the full 

text for over 1,000 journals—with many dating back to 1990—and over 1,700 peer-reviewed journals. 

Paid subscription required. 

FBIS: FOREIGN BROADCAST INFORMATION SYSTEM. https://portal.rccb.osis.gov/ 

An electronic information service that collects and translates current political, economic, technical and 

military information from the media worldwide for the US Government. Individual must register and

establish an account. 

– 37 –
The Tongue and Quill 

FIND ARTICLES.COM. http://www.findarticles.com/

Search for quality articles in more than 300 reputable magazines and journals. 

HISTORICAL ABSTRACTS. http://serials.abc-clio.com/ 

A comprehensive bibliography of articles on the history and culture of the world from 1450 to the present 

excluding the United States and Canada. Paid subscription required. 

LEXIS-NEXIS ACADEMIC UNIVERSE. http://www.lexis-nexis.com/universe 

Provides access to a wide range of full-text news, business, legal, military and reference information. 

Specifically, this service includes: Top News, Biographical Information, General News Topics, Reference 

and Directories, Company News, General Medical and Health Topics, Industry and Market News, Medical 

Abstracts, Government and Political News, Accounting, Auditing, and Tax Legal News, Law Reviews, 

Company Financial Information, Federal Case Law, Country Profiles, US Code, Constitution, and Court 

Rules, State Profiles, and State Legal Research. Paid subscription required. 

PROQUEST. http://www.proquest.com/pqdauto

Magazine articles from over 8,000 publications, with many in full-text, full image format. Paid

subscription required. 

STRATFOR.BIZ. http://www.stratfor.biz/ 

Combines intelligence analysis and news archives on various countries. Paid subscription required. 

WILEY INTERSCIENCE. http://www3.interscience.wiley.com/cgi-bin/simplesearch

Provides the full text of over 300 leading scientific, technical, medical and professional journals. Paid

subscription required. 

OTHER INDEXES 

Some indexes listed below require a paid subscription. Contact your local or base library for availability. 

AP MULTIMEDIA ARCHIVE. http://accuweather.ap.org/cgi-bin/aplaunch.pl

An electronic library containing the AP’s current photos from their 50 million-image print and negative

library, as well as charts, graphs, tables, and maps from the AP’s graphics portfolio. This database will be

useful for your class instruction, briefings or publications. Paid subscription required. 

BRITANNICA ON-LINE. http://search.eb.com/ 

A full text encyclopedia that is accessible via the World Wide Web. It provides articles as well as related 

resources on the Internet. Paid subscription required for full access. 

CIAO (COLUMBIA INTERNATIONAL AFFAIRS ONLINE). http://www.ciaonet.org/

A web-based database designed to be the most comprehensive source for theory and research in

international affairs. It publishes a wide range of scholarship from 1991 on, that includes working papers

from university research institutes, occasional papers series from NGOs, foundation-funded research

projects, and proceedings from conferences. Paid subscription required.

FEDERAL R&D PROJECT SUMMARIES. http://www.osti.gov/fedrnd/ 

Includes more than 240,000 research summaries and awards by three of the major sponsors of research in 

the Federal government. The federal databases available via this source are the Department of Energy

R&D Project Summaries, the National Institutes of Health (NIH), CRISP (Computer Retrieval of

Information on Scientific Projects), Current Awards and the National Science Foundation (NSF) Award

Data. 

– 38 –
Researching Your Topic 

FIRSTSEARCH. http://newfirstsearch.oclc.org 

An electronic information service that is accessible over the Internet. This service provides access to over 

70 databases covering a wide variety of subjects. Paid subscription required. 

GALENET. http://infotrac.galegroup.com 

An electronic information service that is accessible over the Internet. This service will give you access to 

the following databases. Paid subscription required:

• Associations Unlimited. Contains information for approximately 460,000 international and US 

national, regional, state and local nonprofit membership organizations in all fields, including IRS data on

US 501(c) nonprofit organizations.

• Biography and Genealogy Master Index. Focuses on biographical material on people from all time

periods, geographical locations and fields of endeavor. 

• Contemporary Authors. Provides complete biographical and bibliographical information and

references on more than 120,000 US and international authors.

GRAYLIT NETWORK. http://www.osti.gov/graylit 

Provides a portal for over 100,000 unclassified full-text technical reports located at the Department of

Energy (DOE), Department of Defense, Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), and National

Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA). Collections in the GrayLit Network include the DOE

Information Bridge; the Defense Technical Information Center (DTIC) Technical Report Collection, the 

EPA National Environment al Publications Internet Site (NEPIS), the NASA Jet Propulsion Lab Reports, 

and the NASA Langley Technical Reports. 

GPO ACCESS. http://www.access.gpo.gov/multidb.html

An electronic information service that is accessible over the Internet. This service will give you access to 

over 60 databases covering a wide variety of government and congressional subjects. 

JANE’S ONLINE. http://www.janesonline.com 

Provides access to select Jane’s resources including Jane’s Geopolitical Library, Launched Weapons Image 

Library, All The World’s Aircraft, Land Systems Image Library, Military Aircraft Image Library, Military 

Biographies and the Warships Image Library. Paid subscription required for full access. 

JOINT COMBAT CAMERA CENTER. http://dodimagery.afis.osd.mil/dodimagery/home.html 

Database that contains official US Military images from around the world. The DoD Imagery Server 

contains more than 35,000 still images and over 175 QuickTime previews of videotapes. Individuals must 

register and establish an account. 

LEXIS-NEXIS CONGRESSIONAL UNIVERSE. http://web.lexis-nexis.com/congcomp

Provides access to a wealth of congressional publications—including hearings, reports, prints, documents, 

hot topics, bills, laws, regulations and CIS Legislative Histories. This site also allows you to locate specific 

information about members and committees. Paid subscription required. 

NETLIBRARY. http://www.netlibrary.com 

Access the full-text of books electronically. Paid subscription required for full access. 

PERISCOPE. http://www.periscope.ucg.com/

Provides open source intelligence on orders of battle, equipment inventories, and procurement plans and 

programs for 150 nations. It also provides technical descriptions and characteristics for more than 4,500

global weapon systems. Paid subscription required. 

– 39 –
The Tongue and Quill 

POLITICS IN AMERICA. http://www.library.cqpress.com/pia

Provides access to biographical data, committee assignments, election results and key votes as well as

background on members’ districts for the 106th and 107th Congresses. Paid subscription required. 

STAT-USA. http://www.stat-usa.gov/

Provides access to State of the Nation, GLOBUS and NTDB. These resources provide access to current 

and historical economic data, financial releases, information on the US Economy, current and historical

trade-related releases, international market research, trade opportunities, country analysis, and the STATUSA trade library. Paid subscription required. 

SUMMARY

When you’re trying to inform or persuade others, you need to do your homework. In this 

chapter, we covered the basics of how to research your topic and gather the data you 

need. The Internet, the library, your office files, and your coworkers are all potential 

sources of information. Modern technology and the Internet make it easier to gather data 

than ever before, but remember that you need to critically evaluate your sources. 

Research can be enjoyable and rewarding, but make sure you review your purpose, scope 

and schedule before you begin—it helps you stay focused and keeps you from getting lost 

in the data. 

Good news! 

I found a few more

sources for your 

research paper...

Sometimes 

librarians are 

TOO helpful...

– 40 –
CHAPTER 5 

STEP 3: 

SUPPORTING 

YOUR IDEAS 

This chapter covers: 

• Logical arguments—what they are and how to build them. 

• Types of evidence and characteristics of “good evidence.” 

• Common problems with logic. 

• Ethical issues with arguments. 

Once you’ve researched your topic and collected information, you need to figure out how to use 

what you’ve found to meet your communication goals. If you’re dealing with a controversial 

question or problem, throwing facts at your audience won’t be enough—you’ll need to assemble 

it into a logical argument that can stand up to critical attack. This chapter will give you some

helpful pointers on how to build an argument and support your ideas. 

Logical arguments are instruments of power. They’re how you make things happen. It’s worth 

the effort to understand some basics, even if some of this chapter makes your head hurt. 

“A moment’s thought would have shown him. But a moment is a long time, and

thought is a painful process.” 

 — A.E. Housman 

 

– 41 –
The Tongue and Quill 

WHAT ARE LOGICAL ARGUMENTS, AND WHY ARE THEY IMPORTANT? 

When you present a solution to a problem or answer a controversial question, persuasion is part 

of the assignment. There are different approaches to persuade members of your audience—you 

can appeal to their emotions, their ability to reason or even your own credibility on the topic 

being discussed. In the Air Force environment, your best approach to support your ideas and 

persuade others is by building a solid logical argument. 

Though the word “argument” is commonly used to describe a quarrel or disagreement, it also has 

a more positive meaning—it’s a series of statements intended to persuade others. In this chapter, 

when we use the term logical argument, we’re referring to a coherent set of statements that 

provide a position and support for that position based on information and facts, not just 

emotions. 

Why should you care about all this stuff? First, you build logical arguments every day—when 

you talk to a child about chores and allowance; when you talk to your boss about your workload 

and schedules; and when you sort out how best to accomplish the mission. If you build strong 

arguments, things are more likely to work out the way you think they should. Second, others are 

aiming arguments at YOU every day—and some of them are pretty shaky. If you understand 

how arguments are constructed and where they go wrong, you’re less likely to buy into 

somebody else’s muddy thinking. 

ELEMENTS OF A LOGICAL ARGUMENT 

Logical arguments contain four elements: 

Different textbooks have 

different terms and approaches

to describe logical arguments. 

This chapter uses terminology

found in The Craft of

Research, by Booth, Comb and 

Williams, which has been used

in the Air Command and Staff 

College curriculum. 

• a claim 

• evidence that supports the claim

• warrants linking pieces of evidence to the claim

• qualifications that limit the claim

First we’ll describe each of these terms, and then we’ll 

illustrate them in a real-life example of an argument in the 

next section. Don’t panic if it doesn’t seem clear at first—

the example will help clarify each point. 

THE CLAIM. Your claim is simply your position on an issue, your answer to a controversial 

question or your recommendation for resolving a problem. In some academic writing, a claim is 

also called a thesis. 

EVIDENCE THAT SUPPORTS THE CLAIM. By definition, every argument has evidence

intended to give reasons for your claim. A less formal word for evidence is support. (The words 

“support” and “evidence” are used interchangeably in this chapter.) 

If a piece of evidence is questionable, it may be attacked as a subclaim. At that point, you either 

have to provide additional evidence to prove your subclaim is true, or eliminate it from your 

argument. 

– 42 –
Supporting Your Ideas 

WARRANTS THAT LINK EVIDENCE TO THE CLAIM. With every piece of evidence,

there are often assumptions, either stated or unstated, that link the evidence to the claim and 

explain why the evidence is relevant to the argument. These linking statements or concepts are 

called warrants. Warrants are important because they can be potential weaknesses in an 

argument. 

QUALIFICATIONS. Sometimes the argument will have qualifications—conditions that limit 

the claim. You can think of a qualification as a statement you attach to the claim with a big IF 

statement. We often notice these qualifications as we critically look at the evidence we have and 

realize its limitations. 

ELEMENTS OF A LOGICAL ARGUMENT—A REAL LIFE EXAMPLE 

Let’s use a real life example of a logical argument to show 

how the different elements work together. Suppose you’re 

responsible for selecting a guest speaker to teach topic 

XYZ at a Professional Military Education (PME) school. 

Ms. Jane Doe spoke last year, and you’ve decided to invite 

her back. Your boss wants to know your recommendation 

and your rationale. Guess what? You’ve just been asked 

to produce a logical argument. 

ev·i·dence: n the data by

which proof or probability may 

be based ... admissible as 

testimony in a court of law.

sup·port: n information that 

substantiates a position; v To 

furnish evidence for a position.

CLAIM: We should invite Ms. Jane Doe to teach topic XYZ at this year’s class. 

EVIDENCE, item #1: Ms. Doe has spent 26 years working with XYZ and is an expert in this 

field. 

WARRANT, item #1: Spending 26 years of working with XYZ makes her an expert. (Another 

implied warrant is that we want an expert to teach topic XYZ.) 

If someone wanted to attack this bit of evidence, he might ask you to prove the fact that she’s 

spent 26 years in the field—let’s see a resume! 

If someone wanted to attack the underlying warrant, he may argue that she isn’t really an 

expert—maybe she’s been doing an entry-level job for 26 years. 

But let’s suppose that Ms. Doe is indeed an expert in the field and this is solid evidence. 

EVIDENCE, item #2: Last year’s course directors all thought she did an excellent job. 

WARRANT, item #2: These people know what they’re talking about. 

If someone wanted to challenge this evidence, he might ask you to produce letters of 

recommendation. How enthusiastic are the directors about the job she did?

If someone wanted to attack the underlying warrant, he might question the course directors’ 

judgment. Maybe they were new to the job and didn’t know much about the topic. Maybe 

they were TDY during the presentation, and were basing their recommendation on what they 

heard from others. 

In this case, let’s assume that the course directors are both credible and enthusiastic. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

EVIDENCE, item #3: Ms. Doe is a very dynamic lecturer. 

WARRANT, item #3: It’s good to have a dynamic lecturer. 

Recall that evidence you provide to support your claim can be attacked as a subclaim ... and 

this last bit of evidence looks vulnerable. How do we know that Ms. Doe is a dynamic 

lecturer? To back it up, you’d have to “support your support” on item #3 with something like 

this: 

SUBCLAIM: Ms. Doe is a very dynamic lecturer. 

SUBCLAIM EVIDENCE #1: Students provided five times the amount of feedback than is 

typical for a lecture. 

SUBCLAIM WARRANT #1: Student interest is proportional to volume of feedback. 

SUBCLAIM EVIDENCE #2: Ninety-two percent of feedback was very favorable, and 8 

percent was very unfavorable. 

SUBCLAIM WARRANT #2: Polarized feedback implies a dynamic lecture.

Well, this additional information really does back up the fact that Ms. Doe is a dynamic lecturer, 

but it also indicates her views are controversial—8 percent of the student population really didn’t 

like her presentation. You may believe that your school’s goal is education and not to make 

every student happy, but you might qualify your claim with the following “IF” statement: 

QUALIFICATION: 

Ms. Jane Doe should be invited back to teach topic XYZ 

 IF 

it is acceptable to have a controversial speaker at the school. 

TYPES OF EVIDENCE 

As you see, individual pieces of evidence are used to build your argument. In this section, we’ll 

identify some common types of evidence as well as approaches to help explain your ideas to 

your audience. 

A definition is a precise meaning or significance of a word or phrase. In an argument, it can be

helpful to establish a common frame of reference for important or ambiguous words, so don’t 

underestimate the importance of definitions. 

An example is a specific instance chosen to represent a larger fact in order to clarify an abstract 

idea or support a claim. Good examples must be appropriate, brief and attention arresting. 

Quite often they are presented in groups of two or three for impact. 

Testimony uses the comments of recognized authorities to support your claim. These comments 

can be direct quotations or paraphrases, but direct quotations tend to carry more weight with 

listeners or readers. When using testimony as support, make sure the individuals being quoted 

are both generally credible—no unknown relatives or convicted felons, please—and 

knowledgeable in the field under discussion. 

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Supporting Your Ideas 

Statistics provide a summary of data that allows your audience to better interpret quantitative 

information. Statistics can be very persuasive and provide excellent support if handled 

competently. Keep them simple and easy to read and understand. Also, remember to round off 

your statistics whenever possible and document the exact source of your statistics. 

The persuasive power of statistics means that you need to be particularly careful to use them

properly. Many people will put blind trust in numbers and fall prey to people or papers that

spout numbers or statistical proof. (Ironically, people who work with numbers for a living are the 

most cautious about trusting someone else’s statistics!) 

Always, always examine the basic assumption(s) on which the analysis rests. Some of the most 

compelling statistical arguments turn out to be intricate sand castles built on a foundation of 

shaky assumptions. The math may be technically correct, but the assumptions can’t stand up to 

scrutiny. 

In their book Writing Arguments, John Ramage, John Bean and June Johnson define a fact as a 

noncontroversial piece of data that can be confirmed by observation or by talking to communally 

accepted authorities. The authors distinguish a fact from an inference, which is an interpretation 

or explanation of the facts that may be reasonably doubted. They recommend that writers 

distinguish facts from inferences and handle inferences as testimony. 

Definitions, testimony, statistics and facts provide data that you can use to construct an 

argument. This next category—explanation—can also be helpful in supporting your ideas. 

Explanation makes a point plain or understandable or gives the cause of some effect. It can be 

used to clarify your position or provide additional evidence to help make your case. The 

following four techniques can be used as part of an explanation: 

• Analysis: The separation of a whole into smaller pieces for further study; clarifying a 

complex issue by examining one piece at a time. 

• Comparison and Contrast: Comparison and Contrast are birds of similar feather. Use 

comparison to dramatize similarities between two objects or situations and contrast to emphasize 

differences. 

• Description: To tell about in detail, to paint a picture with words—typically more personal 

and subjective than definition. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

CHARACTERISTICS OF GOOD SUPPORTING EVIDENCE 

“There are two kinds of truth. There are real truths and there are 

made-up truths.” 

 — Marion Barry, mayor of Washington DC, 

 on his arrest for drug use 

Though different professions and academic fields have their own standards of what is “good” 

evidence, there are some common characteristics to consider.

Is the information from an authoritative source? 

Will your audience trust this source? And should you? In the previous chapter we stressed the 

importance of being cautious with Internet sites, but you should be wary of any source’s 

credibility. Also, remember that it’s better to refer back to original material than rely on 

someone else’s interpretation of existing work since people and their research are often 

misquoted. Refer back pages 30-32 for questions to consider when evaluating the credibility of 

your sources. 

Is the information accurate and free from error? 

Check and recheck your facts—errors can seriously damage your credibility. Critically evaluate 

your sources, and if you’re uncertain about your facts, be honest with your audience. You can 

increase your confidence in the accuracy of your information by using multiple sources to 

confirm key facts. 

Is your information appropriately precise? 

When we talk about “precision,” we mean the information should be specified within 

appropriately narrow limits. The level of required precision will vary with the topic being 

discussed. Describing regulations for uniform wear may require a precision of fractions of an 

inch, and telling someone that his operational specialty badge should be in the middle of their 

shirt or within a meter of his belt buckle is not adequately precise. On the other hand, when 

reporting on the designated mean point of impact for munitions, a measurement in meters or feet

would be an appropriate level of precision. 

When talking about some subset of a group, explain how many or what percentage of the total 

you’re talking about. If you find yourself constantly using qualifiers like “some, most, many, 

almost, usually, frequently, rarely...” you probably need to find some convincing statistics to 

help you make your case. 

Is your evidence relevant? 

Evidence can be authoritative, accurate and precise, yet still be totally irrelevant. Don’t shove in 

interesting facts that have nothing to do with the claim; help the reader understand the relevance 

of your material by explaining its significance. Explain charts, graphs and figures and use 

transitions in your writing (pages 70-73) to “connect the dots” for the reader. 

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Supporting Your Ideas 

Is your evidence sufficient to support your claim and representative of the whole situation 

or group? 

If you are trying to form some conclusions about a situation or group, you need data that 

represents the complete situation. For example, if you were trying to form conclusions about the 

overall military population, you would want to gather evidence from all services, not just one 

career field in one service. 

If you find that your evidence is either not representative or not sufficient, you need to either find 

more evidence, limit the claim to what you can prove, or qualify your claim. You may have to 

let go of evidence that doesn’t fit or data that is no longer current. 

COMMON MISTAKES IN ARGUMENTS: INFORMAL LOGICAL FALLACIES 

“Many people would sooner die than think–in fact, they do so.” 

 — Bertrand Russell 

Some of you may have studied formal logic in school. These classes used a lot of complex 

language and theory to describe what makes an argument “good” or “bad.” Unfortunately, many 

real life arguments outside of math and engineering are more “squishy” ... and sometimes it’s 

hard to draw a diagram or write an equation to explain exactly what’s wrong. 

Common errors in reasoning are called informal fallacies. They are called “informal” fallacies 

because they’re harder to pin down than some of the “formal” errors in logic. Still, you see them

around you every day—especially in advertising, talk radio or political debates. Keep them out 

of your staff work and learn to identify them in others. 

The informal fallacies below have been clumped into major categories that make sense to the 

editors, but there’s no universally accepted approach to categorizing them. Also note that 

labeling something as a fallacy requires some judgment—after all, many of these are “grey 

areas.” 

1. An Asserted conclusion is the practice of slipping in an assertion and passing it off as a fact. 

Two variations include circular reasoning and loaded questions. 

1a. Circular reasoning (also known as begging the question) involves rewording your 

claim and trying to use it as evidence, usually with a lot of other “filler sentences” designed 

to confuse the other person. This is popular in advertising where different versions of the 

claim are repeated over and over again. After a while, it’s easy to forget there’s absolutely 

no support there at all. 

CLAIM: 

“Hey guys! Drink Brand X beer, and you’ll be popular!” 

SUPPORT:

“Beautiful women in bikinis will compete for your attention!” 

“You’ll have many good looking and physically fit friends!” 

“Women will want you, and men will want to be like you...” 

If the advertisers have their way, you may not notice that the “support” merely 

restates the claim using different words—a textbook case of circular reasoning. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

1b. A Loaded question has an assertion embedded in it—it’s another form of an asserted 

conclusion. One example of a loaded question is “Do you think John Smith is going to 

improve his rude behavior?” The phrasing of the question itself implies that John has 

behaved poorly in the past—regardless of how you answer the question. “When are we 

going to stop sinking money on this expensive program?” has an embedded assumption: the 

money we’ve spent to date hasn’t been effective. 

Sometimes an arguer will assert a conclusion, then challenge someone else to disprove it. The 

best defense is to ask him or her to prove their claim. “How do you know these programs are 

effective?” puts the listener on the defensive. The proper response would be, “How do you know 

the programs are not effective?” Remember, those who assert should have the burden of proof. 

2. Character attack involves an assault on your opponent as an 

individual, instead of his or her position. It’s very common in 

political advertisements, but you see it in the workplace as well. 

Here are some examples: 

The classic name for a 

character attack is the Ad 

Hominem fallacy (in Latin, 

Ad Hominem means “to the 

man”). Character attacks are 

also sometimes called 

Poisoning the Well. 

“Mr. Smith is a tax and spend liberal who voted himself a pay 

raise last year.” (If the topic being discussed is environmental 

legislation, this is irrelevant to the core of the debate). 

“That guy is a egotistical windbag—what would he know about A-76 contract transitions?” (He 

may know a lot—his personality is irrelevant to the issue). 

3. Emotional appeals try to persuade the heart, not the head. Though emotion plays a role in 

persuasion, when emotion replaces reasoning in an argument, you’ve committed a foul. Often 

arguers attempt to appeal to our emotions in an argument through biased language, vivid 

language and stirring symbols. They may try to persuade us using “character” issues such as 

glowing testimonials from popular but noncredible sources. Here are some examples of logical 

fallacies in this area: 

3a. Emotional appeal (to force): An argument that targets the audience’s fear of 

punishment. What characterizes these examples as fallacies is that they make no attempt to 

persuade using anything other than pressure. 

“Keep this quiet, or I’ll implicate you in my wrongdoing.” 

“Give me your lunch money, or I’ll give you a busted lip.” 

3b. Emotional appeal (to pity): An argument that targets the audience’s compassion and 

concern for others. Though most people would agree that ethics and values should be part of 

the decision-making process, an appeal solely to emotion, even a positive one, can be 

dangerous and misguided. 

“You can’t give me an D on this paper—I’ll lose my tuition assistance!”

“We’ve got to stop the warlords—look at the poor, starving people on the news!” 

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Supporting Your Ideas 

3c. Emotional appeal (to popularity/tradition) 

1. Appeal using Stirring Symbols: Using a powerful symbol or attractive label to build

support. 

“I stand before our nation’s flag to announce my run for President....” 

“Good management principles demand we take this course of action.” 

2. Bandwagon Appeal: Using peer pressure to build support. 

“It must be right—everybody else thinks so.” 

“Buy the Ford Escort; it’s the world’s #1 best seller.” 

“Every good fighter pilot knows....” 

3. Precedent as sole support: Using custom as the only justification for a decision. 

“It must be right—we’ve always done it that way.” 

“The RAF has found the procedure very useful and we should try it.” 

“The last three commanders supported this policy and that’s good enough for me.” 

4. False authority is a fallacy tied to accepting facts based on the opinion of an unqualified 

authority. The Air Force is chock-full of people who, because of their position or authority in 

one field, are quoted on subjects in other fields for which they have limited or no expertise. 

Don’t be swayed (or try to sway someone else). 

A false authority variant is called the primacy-of-print fallacy, where facts are believed because 

they are published in a book, periodical or on a web site. Be as skeptical and thoughtfully 

critical of the printed word as you are of the spoken word and check out the suggestions on 

evaluating sources on pages 30-32. 

5. False cause (also known as the Post Hoc fallacy) occurs when you assume one event causes 

a second event merely because it precedes the second event. Many people observe that Event B 

occurred after Event A and conclude that A caused B. This is not necessarily true—maybe a 

third factor, Event C, caused both A and B. 

Consider the following example: 

Event A = At Base X, “Retreat” plays over the intercom at 1635 each day. 

Event B = At Base X, outbound traffic increases at the gate at 1640 each day. 

There is a statistical correlation between these two events: if Event A happens, Event B is more 

likely to happen and visa versa. Does that mean A causes B? Not necessarily—possibly a third 

event may “cause” both A and B: 

Event C = At Base X the official duty day ends at 1630 for much of the workforce. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

6. A Single cause fallacy occurs when you assume there is a single cause for an outcome, when 

in fact multiple causes exist. 

Let’s consider a real life example of a single cause fallacy. Suppose you’re very physically fit, 

and in a few months you’ll take a fitness test that measures your heart rate on a stationary bike. 

You’ve set a goal to score in the top 10 percent for your age group—an “outstanding” rating. 

You know that a disciplined exercise program will cause you to improve your score, but is it this 

simple? 

Event A = disciplined, intense exercise program 

 CAUSES

Event B = outstanding score on the fitness test 

People who’ve had trouble with similar fitness tests would be quick to point out that cause and 

effect may be a little more complicated in this case: 

Event A = disciplined, intense exercise program 

Event B = genetically low resting heart rate

Event C = no caffeine or nervousness about the test 

Event D = planets all in alignment and a strong tail wind... 

 CAUSES 

Event E = outstanding score on the fitness test

On the other hand, people who have the genetically low heart rate and nerves of steel may think 

an outstanding rating has a single cause because they’ve never had to deal with the other ones. 

7. Faulty analogy. Though we often make analogies to make a point, sometimes they go 

astray—there’s something about the comparison that isn’t relevant. A faulty analogy implies 

that because two things are alike in one way, they are alike in all the ways that matter. It can be 

thought of as one example of a non sequitur fallacy (see item 11). 

“Leading a coalition is just like leading a fighter squadron.” 

Well, not exactly. Leadership is required in both situations, but leading a coalition requires the 

ability to work with people from other services and countries, and requires greater 

communication, tact and diplomacy. Leading a fighter squadron may require a higher level of 

current technical proficiency in the cockpit. There are people who would excel in one situation 

and fail in the other. 

8. Faulty dilemma. A faulty dilemma is that implication that no middle ground exists between 

two options. Typically one option presented is what the speaker prefers, and the other option is 

clearly unacceptable. 

“Spend one hour a day reading Tongue and Quill to improve your writing skills ... or 

stay an incoherent loser. It’s your choice.” 

Clearly this is a faulty dilemma—it falsely suggests you only have two choices, when you really 

have many options. Maybe you can read The Tongue and Quill once a week or once a month. 

Maybe you’ll find some other way to improve your writing skills—take a class, find a grammar 

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Supporting Your Ideas 

website, get feedback from your boss, etc. Though sometimes life really does give us an “eitheror” choice, in most cases we find a considerable range of options between two positions. 

9. Hasty generalization results when we “jump to conclusions” without enough evidence. A 

few examples used as proof may not represent the whole. 

“I asked three student pilots what they thought of the program, and it’s obvious that 

Undergraduate Pilot Training needs an overhaul.” 

One of the challenges with this fallacy is it’s hard to determine how much evidence is “enough” 

to form a reasonable conclusion. The rules will vary with the situation; more evidence is needed 

to form a conclusion if the stakes are high. The Food and Drug Administration may require a 

great deal of evidence before deciding a drug is safe for human use, while SSgt Snuffy may 

require very little evidence before forming a generalized conclusion about which candy bars 

should be sold at the snack bar. 

10. Non sequitur is a generic term for a conclusion that does not necessarily follow from the 

facts presented—non sequitur means “it does not follow” in Latin. The facts may not be 

relevant, or there may be some sort of illogical leap made. Several of the fallacies listed here, 

including faulty analogy and hasty generalization, can be thought of as different types of non 

sequitur. 

“John Doe will make a great squadron commander because he was a hot stick in the F15.” 

This is a non sequitur because it implies that because he has strong technical skills, he also has 

the skills needed to command. Another fairly common non sequitur in military circles assumes 

that athletic prowess translates into leadership ability. 

11. Slippery slope implies that if we take one small step in an unpleasant or dangerous 

direction, we’ll have to go all the way—like slipping down a hill. Here’s an example from the 

book of Writing Arguments by Ramage, Bean and Johnson: 

“We don’t dare send weapons to Country X. If we do so, next we will send in military 

advisors, then a Special Forces battalion and then large numbers of troops. Finally, we 

will be in an all-out war.” 

Though not every slippery slope argument is false, in some cases we can identify lines that we 

will not cross. 

12. Red herring fallacies occur when an arguer deliberately brings up irrelevant information to 

get the audience off track. The origins of the “red herring” name are debatable, but imagine 

someone dragging a large smelly fish across a scent trail that a bloodhound is following—the 

dog would probably lose the scent. 

13. Stacked evidence is the tendency to withhold facts or manipulate support so that the 

evidence points in only one direction. It also happens when you gather only the data or opinions 

that support your position. Though sometimes this is done deliberately, in other cases it occurs 

due to unconscious bias or carelessness. We don’t even see counterarguments or alternative 

ways of interpreting the information because of our firm belief in our own position, or we just 

stop gathering information once we we’ve found enough data to make our case. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

Even if you decide to push for your favorite interpretation of the data, never stack evidence by 

misrepresenting or manipulating the basic information. Also, even if you decide that you don’t 

want to discuss the opposing viewpoint, you should at least be aware of it, so you can prepare a 

counterpunch if needed. 

14. Straw man is a fallacy where you fail to attack your opponent’s argument directly. Instead, 

you make up a weaker, grossly simplified version of the opponent’s argument, and then attack it. 

In effect, you are attacking a “straw man”—the argument that you wished your opponent made, 

not the one he actually did. 

Straw man fallacies are popular in political campaigns. Suppose a candidate believed that a 

major goal of prisons should be rehabilitation—breaking the cycle of violence—not just 

punishment. An opponent could exploit that with a straw man attack: 

“My opponent coddles convicted felons and wants to make life easier behind bars than on 

the street. I believe prison should be a deterrent, not a reward for bad behavior!” 

This list of fallacies captures most of the common errors we hear and see daily. Our challenge is 

to sharpen our professional sense of smell so we can quickly sniff out the rational from the 

ridiculous, and avoid adding to the epidemic of poor reasoning and weak support we encounter 

around us. 

ETHICS AND ARGUMENTS: PERSUASION, THE QUEST FOR TRUTH, AND ISSUES 

OF CREDIBILITY

“We believe that argument is a matter not of fist banging or of win-lose

debate but of finding, through a process of rational inquiry, the best 

solution of a problem.” 

– from Writing Arguments, by John D. Ramage, 

 John C. Bean, and June Johnson 

We’ve all had experience with using logical arguments to persuade someone else. In the middle 

of such a discussion, you may have asked yourself, “What’s my goal—to persuade the other guy 

and make my case? Or to find out the truth and the best answer to the problem?” (This usually 

comes up when your opponent comes up with a valid point you hadn’t considered before.) Ever 

since the ancient Greeks were walking around in togas, people have struggled with this issue. 

There will always be reasons to use argument as a tool of persuasion—you want your 

subordinate to win that award, you really need additional funding for your branch, and you want 

your wife to visit her in-laws over the Thanksgiving weekend. 

Sometimes in the heat of verbal battle, it’s tempting to focus on persuasion and forget about 

truth. Don’t do it. Integrity is one of our Air Force Core Values, and you have to look at 

yourself in the mirror every morning. You don’t have to be a doormat, but if you find out about 

some new information that may change your position, keep an open mind. In most situations, 

you don’t only want YOUR WAY, you want THE BEST WAY. Besides, if you pull a fast one 

and get your way through deception, you’ve won a battle, but your credibility is shot and you’ve 

crippled yourself for future skirmishes. 

Other ways to build credibility with your audience include being knowledgeable and fair. 

Research your topic carefully, and take the time to get the facts right. Don’t bluff if you don’t 

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Supporting Your Ideas 

have an answer, or mislead others about the strength of your support. Consider your audience’s 

values and assumptions when selecting evidence. Make sure you get the easy things right—the 

spelling of names, significant dates, and other details like grammar and punctuation. 

Demonstrate goodwill in your writing tone—don’t be condescending or act superior. If you 

make a mistake, acknowledge it and move on. Credibility takes a long time to build, but it is 

invaluable when trying to support your ideas and persuade others. 

SUMMARY 

In this chapter we covered several topics that should help you support your ideas. 

We defined a logical argument as a set of statements designed to persuade others. Logical 

arguments have four components: 

• a claim—your position on a controversial topic 

• evidence that supports your claim

• warrants that identify why the evidence is relevant (these are often implied) 

• qualifications that limit the claim

Your argument is built upon evidence, and it should be authoritative, accurate, precise, relevant, 

and adequate to support your claim. As you build or listen to logical arguments, watch out for 

logical fallacies—common mistakes many people make when building an argument. 

Arguments are everywhere. To write and speak persuasively, it helps to understand how 

arguments are constructed and where they go wrong. These insights will be helpful as you start 

to organize and outline your thoughts—the next step of the process.

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The Tongue and Quill 

Step-by-Step Outline: 

Seven Steps to Effective Communication 

1. Analyze Purpose and Audience 

 a. Analyze purpose 

 b. Analyze audience 

2. Conduct Research 

 a. Search for relevant information 

 b. Critically evaluate your sources 

3. Support your Ideas 

 a. Build your argument 

 b. Check for mistakes in reasoning 

4. Organize and Outline 

 a. Finalize your purpose statement 

 b. Pick an organizational pattern 

 c. Write your outline

5. Draft 

 a. Draft flow of paragraphs 

 b. Write clear sentences 

 c. Pick the right word for the job 

6. Edit 

 a. Edit for “the big picture” 

 b. Check your paragraph structure 

 c. Edit sentences and phrases 

7. Fight for Feedback and win Approval 

 a. Seek informal feedback 

 b. Coordinate to obtain formal approval 

An outline helps you see 

the big picture and how 

individual ideas flow 

together. We are here, on

Step 4... 

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CHAPTER 6 

STEP 4: 

ORGANIZING 

AND OUTLINING 

YOUR THOUGHTS

This chapter covers: 

• How to develop a purpose statement. 

• The importance of a three-part structure. 

• Different formats for organizing your outline. 

After completing the first three steps, you are well on your way to an outstanding spoken or 

written product. Now it’s time to talk about organizing and outlining, the final step in 

prewriting. A detailed outline helps you arrange your material logically, see relationships 

between ideas, and serves as a reference point to keep you on target as you write your draft. 

Think of your outline as the blueprint for your communication product, and realize that the time 

you spend preparing it will pay off when you start writing sentences and paragraphs.

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The Tongue and Quill 

ORGANIZING: 

FINALIZING YOUR PURPOSE STATEMENT AND 

“BOTTOM LINE” 

Why are we talking about a purpose statement again? Didn’t we 

determine our “bottom line” back in Step 1? Or did we? 

Sometimes information uncovered during the research process 

(Step 2) may point you in an unexpected direction. So do you 

tweak the data to match your original purpose? No! Now is the 

time to adjust the vector of your purpose statement to something 

you can reasonably support and live with. 

You’re less likely to go astray during the outlining process if you 

write down your purpose statement and refer to it often. Every 

main point and supporting idea in your outline should support that purpose statement—irrelevant 

facts or opinions should be eliminated. Discipline at this stage will save pain later. 

A thesis statement is a 

specialized form of purpose 

statement used in academic 

or persuasive writing.

The thesis statement captures

the author’s point of view on

a controversial topic, which

he or she defends throughout 

the paper. A thesis 

statement is usually finalized

after the research process. 

ORGANIZING: GET YOUR BOTTOM LINE UP FRONT (MOST OF THE TIME) 

“In the future, authors will take a long time to get to the point.

That way the book looks thicker.” 

 — Scott Adams in The Dilbert Future: 

 Thriving on Stupidity in the 21st Century

In nearly every communication situation, you need to state your bottom line early in the 

message. In a direct or deductive approach, state your position, main point or purpose up front, 

then go into the details that support your main point. When you take a direct approach to 

communication, your audience is better prepared to digest the details of the message and 

logically make the connections in its own mind. 

There is an exception to every rule, and you might want to be less direct when trying to persuade 

a hostile audience. In such a situation, if you state your bottom line up front, you risk turning 

them off before you build your argument—regardless of how well it is supported. In this case 

you might consider using an indirect or inductive approach: you may present your support and 

end with your bottom line. Sometimes this successfully “softens the blow” and gives your 

audience time to warm up to your views. 

In the inductive approach, you still need an introduction, but it would be less direct. Here’s an 

example of two purpose statements: 

Direct: Women should be allowed in combat because.... 

Indirect: The issue of women in combat has been hotly debated, and both sides have valid points....

Use the inductive approach with caution; it’s an advanced technique and difficult to execute 

without confusing your audience. In an academic setting, seek your instructor’s advice before 

applying this method to your assignments. 

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Organizing and Outlining Your Thoughts 

THE OUTLINE: WHY DO I NEED ONE? 

To some people, preparing an outline looks like a painful chore. Though an outline does take 

some effort, it’s a time-saver, not a time-waster. An outline contains your main points and 

supporting ideas arranged in a logical order. It allows you to see and test the flow of your ideas 

on paper without having to write out complete sentences and paragraphs. If some ideas don’t fit 

together or flow naturally, you can rearrange them without a lot of effort. Like the blueprint of a 

house, an outline makes the “construction process” more efficient and often results in a better 

quality product. 

Does all writing require you to take the time to write a detailed outline with several layers of 

detail? No. If you plan to write a short letter, message or report, a list of main points may be all 

you need. For longer papers, Air Force publications, reports, staff studies, etc., you’ll find a 

detailed outline is usually an indispensable aid. 

OUTLINING: THREE-PART STRUCTURE 

Chapter 7 will describe how most writing and speaking is organized in a three-part structure 

consisting of an introduction, a body and a conclusion. Most of the work in developing an 

outline involves organizing the body of your communication, but if you are building a formal or 

detailed outline on a lengthy written product, you should probably include the introduction and 

conclusion in the outline. A skilled communicator writing an informal outline on a short 

assignment may just outline the body and work out the introduction and conclusion during the 

drafting process. 

OUTLINING FORMATS: 

HEADINGS AND STRUCTURE USED IN FORMAL OUTLINES 

Though most outlines you produce will never be seen by anyone else, in some cases you might 

be asked to produce a formal outline for “public consumption.” Here are some possible 

scenarios: 

• Your boss wants to review what you plan to cover before you start drafting. 

• Your document will have numbered headings and subheadings. 

• You’re organizing the efforts of multiple writers who must work together.

In these situations, it’s helpful to have a consistent approach to numbering or lettering the 

different components of your outline. Be consistent once you pick your approach. 

One option for an outline format is to use a numerical structure to identify different levels of the 

outline. In complicated documents like military publications, these levels may also be used as 

headings in the finished document to help readability. Another classic option is to use a mix of 

Roman numerals, Arabic numerals and uppercase and lowercase letters to identify the different 

levels. (For a refresher on Roman numerals, check out on page 336. A third option is to use the 

same headings as the paragraph labels in an official memo; see page 185 for details). 

Note that some sections of your outline may be more detailed than others. In the below outline it 

is perfectly acceptable to divide section 1.2 into smaller elements and leave section 1.1 and 1.3 

undivided. 

– 57 –
The Tongue and Quill 

These two examples illustrate a cardinal rule 

of outlining: any topic that is divided must 

have at least two parts. Never create a Part 

1 without a Part 2, or a Section A without a 

Section B. 

NUMERICAL OUTLINE FORMAT

1. Section 1 

 1.1 First subheading to Section 1

 1.2 Second subheading to Section 1 

1.2.1 First subheading to 1.2

1.2.2 Second subheading to 1.2 

 1.3 Third subheading to Section 1 

2. Section 2 

 2.1 First subheading to Section 2

2.1.1 First subheading to 2.1

2.1.2 Second subheading to 2.1 

 2.2 Second subheading to Section 2 

3. Section 3...

These are only two of many possible formats 

for numbering different levels of a detailed 

outline. If your final product requires a 

particular format for headings or organization 

(for example, if you are writing an Air Force 

publication), you might save time later by 

building your outline with the format 

specified for the finished product. If not, any 

consistent approach will work fine. CLASSICAL OUTLINE FORMAT

I. Section I... 

A. First Subheading to Section I 

 1. Firstsubheading to I.A 

 a. 

 b. 

 2. Second subheading to I.A

 a. ... 

 b. ... 

B. Second Subheading to Section I

 1. Firstsubheading to I.B

 a. 

 b. 

 2. Second subheading to “I.B” 

 a. 

II. Section II.... 

Some people get tied up in knots over the 

mechanics of a formal outline. Remember 

that the primary purpose of an outline is to 

help you arrange your thoughts into main 

points and subordinate ideas, so relax and use 

a format that works for you. 

 Tip: Each item in an outline should begin at the left margin. Second and following lines 

should be in block format or indented to align with the first word in the line above. 

– 58 –
Organizing and Outlining Your Thoughts 

OUTLINING THE BODY: PICK A PATTERN 

Your next step is to select a pattern that enables you and your readers to move systematically and 

logically through your ideas from a beginning to a conclusion. Some of the most common 

organizational patterns are listed below. Your purpose, the needs of your audience, and the 

nature of your material will influence your choice of pattern.

1. TOPICAL/CLASSIFICATION PATTERN 

Use this format to present groups of ideas, objects or events 

by categories. This is a commonly used pattern to present 

general statements followed by numbered listings of 

subtopics to support, explain, or expand the statements. 

A topical pattern usually follows some logical order that 

reflects the nature of the material and the purpose of the 

communication. For example, if you are giving a briefing 

on helicopters, you might separate them into light, medium, 

and heavy lift capabilities and briefly describe the weight 

limits for each category. You could begin with the lightest 

capability and move to the heaviest or begin with the 

heaviest and move to the lightest. 

 Tip: To help your readers absorb complex or 

unfamiliar material, consider organizing your material to 

move from the most familiar to the unfamiliar or from the 

simplest category to the most complex. When using this pattern, experiment to find the 

arrangement that will be most comfortable for your audience. 

Outline: Comparison of 

F-15 and F-16 Performance 

A. General Description 

1. F-15

2. F-16

B. Detailed Comparison

1. Spec 1

 - F-15 

 - F-16

2. Spec 2

 - F-15

 - F-16

3. Spec 3

 - F-15

 - F-16

4. Spec 4

 - F-15

 - F-16

2. COMPARISON/CONTRAST PATTERN 

Use this style when you need to discuss similarities and/or differences between topics, concepts, 

or ideas. 

When you are describing similarities and differences, it often helps the reader to see a point-bypoint comparison of the two items. For example, if you were writing a document that compares 

and contrasts certain characteristics of the F-15 and the F-16, you might go item by item, 

discussing similarities and differences between the two as you go. 

3. CHRONOLOGICAL PATTERN 

When you use this pattern, you discuss events, problems or processes in the sequence of time in 

which they take place or should take place (past to present or present to future). This commonly 

used pattern is used in writing histories, tracing the evolution of processes, recording problem

conditions, and documenting situations that evolve over time. 

This approach is also used in official biographies, which are written in chronological order 

because they serve as a history of the member’s professional career. 

– 59 –
The Tongue and Quill 

This pattern is simple to use, but judgment is required when deciding what events to leave in and 

what events to leave out. For example, if you were preparing a short biography to introduce a 

distinguished guest speaker, you may decide to emphasize experiences that demonstrate his 

subject matter expertise and leave out other important but less relevant details. When unsure 

what to include, think back to your purpose and audience. 

 Tip: You may want to consider a chronological approach to your topic when it is known to 

be controversial. Many writers and speakers will announce, “First let’s take a look at the history 

of the problem.” This starts the sender and audience out on neutral ground instead of just 

launching into the issue at hand. This is a type of inductive approach, and again, should be used 

with caution. 

4. SEQUENTIAL PATTERN 

The sequential or step-by-step approach is similar to the chronological pattern. Use this 

approach to describe a sequence of steps necessary to complete a technical procedure or process. 

Usually the timing of steps is not as important as the specific order in which they are performed. 

The outline on the first page of this chapter (“Seven Steps to Effective Communication”) is an 

example of a sequential approach. 

The sequential approach is often used in manuals and other instruction books. For example, a 

Security Forces NCO in charge of small arms training might use this pattern when rewriting the 

teaching manual on how to safely inspect, load, fire, disassemble, and clean weapons. Since 

safety is paramount, the process must be written in a precise, stepwise fashion to ensure that 

nothing is overlooked. 

 Tip: When describing a procedure, explain the importance of sequence so your audience is 

mentally prepared to pay close attention to the order, not just the content, of the information. 

5. SPATIAL/GEOGRAPHICAL PATTERN 

When using this pattern, you’ll start at some point in space and proceed in sequence to other 

points. The pattern is based on a directional strategy—north to south, east to west, clockwise or 

counterclockwise, bottom to top, above and below, etc. Let’s say you are a weather officer 

briefing pilots about current and anticipated conditions in the geographic region where they will 

be flying a mission. You would most likely describe conditions in reference to the terrain and 

describe weather systems that will affect their mission on a map. 

 Tip: CAUTION! Make sure to use appropriate transitions to indicate spatial relationships—

to the left, farther to the left, still farthermost to the left; adjacent to, a short distance away, etc. 

These signal the flow of the communication; if missing, your audience can easily become

confused or disoriented. (We’ll talk more about transitions in the next chapter, on pages 70-73). 

– 60 –
Organizing and Outlining Your Thoughts 

6. PROBLEM/SOLUTION PATTERN 

You can use this pattern to identify and describe a problem and one or more possible solutions, 

or an issue and possible techniques for resolving the issue. Discuss all facets of the problem—its 

origin, its characteristics, and its impact. When 

describing the proposed solution, include enough 

support to convince your readers the solution is 

practical and cost effective. After presenting 

your solution, you may want to identify 

immediate actions required to implement the 

solution.

The problem/solution pattern may be used in 

several variations: 

• One Solution: Discuss the problem and 

follow with the single, most logical solution.

• Multiple Solutions: Discuss the problem,

several possible solutions, the effects of each and 

your recommendation. 

• Multiple Solutions, Pro-Con: This popular 

format includes a discussion of the advantages 

(“Pros”) and disadvantages (“Cons”) of each 

solution.

Remember that a problem-solution pattern is not 

a format for a personal attack on an adversary;

it’s simply a systematic approach to use in 

persuading people either to accept your ideas or 

to modify their own ideas. 

7. REASONING/LOGIC PATTERN 

In this pattern, you state an opinion and then 

make your case by providing support for your 

position. This is the classic “logical argument” described in Chapter 5. This approach works 

well when your goal is more than just discussion of problems and possible solutions. Use this 

pattern when your mission is to present research that will lead your audience down the path to 

your point of view! 

Problem Solution Example: 

The Staff Study 

The Staff Study format described on page 203

is a classic example of a problem/solution 

pattern. Within this format, you can present 

several possible solutions or just the one you 

recommend. A staff study with three options 

might have an outline that looks like this: 

1. PROBLEM

2. FACTORS BEARING ON THE 

PROBLEM 

 a. Facts 

 b. Assumptions 

 c. Evaluation criteria for solutions 

3. DISCUSSION OF POSSIBLE 

SOLUTIONS 

 a. Option 1- pros and cons

 b. Option 2- pros and cons 

 c. Option 3- pros and cons

4. CONCLUSION

 “Option 3 is recommended...” 

5. ACTION RECOMMENDED

 “Take the following steps...” 

Though you can list your options in any order,

skilled writers often “save the best for last” 

and put their recommended option last on the

list to help readability.

 Tip: Remember your audience analysis? If members of your audience are hostile to your 

position, try to look at this issue through their eyes. Start out with the support they are most 

likely to accept, and then move into the less popular issues that support your main point. 

– 61 –
The Tongue and Quill 

8. CAUSE/EFFECT 

You can use this pattern to show how one or more 

ideas, actions or conditions lead to other ideas, actions 

or conditions. Two variations of this pattern are 

possible: (1) begin with the effect, then identify the 

causes; or (2) begin with the causes, then identify the 

effects. The technique you use depends on the context 

of your discussion. 

Sometimes an effect-to-cause approach is used when 

your purpose is to identify WHY something happened. 

When might you use this approach? Let’s say you are 

the president of the Safety Investigation Board 

following a fatal aircraft mishap (the effect). Your report might begin by describing the mishap 

itself, and then explain the factors that led up to the mishap and conclude with your 

determination of one or more causes for the effect. 

Causes, Effects and Faulty Logic 

Be careful to avoid faulty logic traps 

when writing about cause and effect. 

You’re guilty of a false cause fallacy

when you assume one event causes a 

second event merely because it precedes

the second event. You’re guilty of a 

single cause fallacy when you assume

only one factor caused an outcome, when

in fact there are multiple causes. For 

more details on these and other fallacies, 

refer back to Chapter 5. 

Sometimes a cause-to-effect pattern is used when your purpose is to explain how current actions 

or conditions (causes) may produce future consequences (effects). For example, someone might 

use this pattern to present how a series of causes—larger automobiles, reduced financial 

incentives for energy conservation and reduced research funding for alternative energy 

technologies—might result in an undesirable effect—a US shortage of fossil fuels. 

SUMMARY 

A well-planned outline can ease the pain of writing your first draft. Remember, building a house 

is much easier with a blueprint! This invaluable tool will help you remain focused on your 

purpose statement and help ensure your support is organized, relevant and tailored to your 

mission and audience. The outline will also help in the editing process. Take a break after 

working on your outline and start fresh before you begin your draft. Good luck! 

– 62 –
PART III: 

WRITING WITH FOCUS 

– 63 –
– 64 –

PREWRITING PROCESS SUMMARY: STEPS 1-4 

BEFORE STARTING YOUR DRAFT, YOU SHOULD KNOW... 

STEP 1. ANALYZE PURPOSE AND AUDIENCE 

Your purpose: to direct, inform, persuade or inspire (reference page 19). 

Your purpose statement: one sentence that captures your bottom line (reference page 20). 

Your schedule for the assignment. 

Your communication format: Point paper? Staff study? Academic essay?

Your audience: experience, education, attitudes about topic, etc. (pages 21-22). 

Your unit’s position: Could you create problems for others? Should you coordinate this? 

The appropriate tone will depend on purpose and audience: usually polite, personal, 

positive, and inclusive; often informal and direct (pages 23-24). 

STEP 2. RESEARCH YOUR TOPIC 

Relevant information from boss, coworkers, office files, Internet and the library. 

STEP 3. SUPPORT YOUR IDEAS 

How to use relevant information to support your ideas and meet your purpose. 

How to “build a case” (a logical argument) for your position, if needed. 

How to use facts, definitions, statistics and testimony as evidence for your position. 

How to avoid mistakes in your logic and notice problems with your evidence. 

STEP 4. ORGANIZE AND OUTLINE 

Your chosen organizational pattern (topical, chronological, problem/solution, etc.). 

Your outline, which graphically shows the flow of your main points. 
CHAPTER 7 

 STEP 5: 

 WRITING 

YOUR DRAFT 

This chapter covers: 

• Drafting using a three-part structure (introduction, body and conclusion). 

• Drafting effective paragraphs. 

• Drafting clear and concise sentences. 

• Overcoming writer’s block. 

After completing the prewriting process, you’ve got what you need to produce a first rate 

communication product. Congratulations! You’re ready to write your first draft! In this chapter 

we’ll take a “top down” approach to writing a draft. We’ll start with the big picture: a three-part 

structure consisting of the introduction, the body, and the conclusion. Next, we’ll describe how 

to write effective paragraphs within the body. Finally, we’ll dig down deeper into the sentences, 

phrases, and words that make up the paragraphs of your draft. 

 

“The basic rule every military writer ought to live by is this: 

‘I will write only when I must.’” 

 — Colonel William A. McPeak 

– 65 –
The Tongue and Quill 

DRAFTING BASIC PHILOSOPHY 

Keep a few things in mind as you start the drafting process. A draft is not the finished product, 

and each sentence does not have to be polished and perfect. Your focus should be to get your 

ideas on paper. Don’t obsess about grammar, punctuation, spelling, and word choice at this 

point—that comes later. You don’t have to fix every mistake as you see it—you can catch these 

during the editing process. 

On the other hand, it’s helpful to keep an eye on your outline when drafting your masterpiece, 

especially when you’re writing something longer than a page or two. By periodically checking 

your outline, you are less likely to lose focus and include irrelevant information. 

Okay, this sounds great, but have you ever sat down to start your first draft and found yourself 

just staring at the blank computer screen or paper? If you suffer from writer’s block, we’ll cover 

strategies for overcoming this fairly common problem at the end of this chapter. 

THREE PART STRUCTURE: AN INTRODUCTION, BODY AND CONCLUSION 

What is your draft going to look like? Is it going to be one huge paragraph? No, in most cases, 

you’ll organize your draft in a three-part structure—introduction, body and conclusion. 

• The introduction must capture your audience’s attention, establish rapport and announce 

your purpose. 

• The body must be an effective sequence of ideas that flow logically in a series of paragraphs. 

• The conclusion must summarize the main points stated in the body and close smoothly. 

Let’s take a closer look at this structure. We’ll examine these parts out of order—first, the 

introduction, then the conclusion and lastly the body where we’ll spend most of our “time.” 

DRAFTING THE INTRODUCTION 

The introduction sets the stage and tone for your message. Although the content and length of 

your introduction may vary with the assignment, the introduction should, at a minimum, clearly 

state your purpose (“bottom line”) and the direction 

you plan to take the audience. Stage Setting Remarks: 

Use them properly! 

Stage setting remarks are optional. 

Though they add polish to an 

introduction, your reader has to be

able to pick which sentences are 

“setting the stage” and which 

sentence is the “bottom line.” 

If you’ve received feedback that 

readers are sometimes confused 

about the purpose of your writing,

get to the point quickly and don’t 

overdo stage-setting remarks. Too

many preliminaries can backfire 

and actually confuse the reader. 

A typical introduction has three components: stage

setting remarks, a purpose statement, and an overview. 

• Stage-setting remarks set the tone of the 

communication, capture the audience’s attention and 

encourage them to read further. Stage setting remarks 

are optional, so you can omit them in very short 

messages or in messages where you don’t want to 

waste words. 

• The purpose statement is the one sentence you’d 

keep if you had only one. It specifically states your 

purpose, thesis or main point. For some examples and 

more details, refer back to Chapter 3 (page 20). 

– 66 –
Writing Your Draft 

• The overview is like a good roadmap—it clearly presents your main points, previews your 

paragraph sequence and ties your main points to your purpose. 

Here’s an example of a short introduction that contains all three components: 

Communication is essential to mission accomplishment, and all Air Force personnel should be 

able to write effectively. (Stage Setting Remarks) This handbook provides general guidelines and 

specific formats for use in both staff environments and Professional Military Education schools. 

(Purpose Statement) It begins with an overarching philosophy on military communication, then 

describes processes and techniques to improve writing and speaking products, and summarizes the 

most common formats used in Air Force communication. (Overview)

Even though readers read the introduction first, you don’t have to write it first. If 

the introduction doesn’t come easily or naturally, you can work on another part of the 

communication and then return to it. Some writers backpedal and don’t want to work on 

the introduction until the rest of the communication is written. Others insist it guides 

them in shaping the content or body of their message. Regardless of when you write the 

introduction, make sure that it captures your purpose and make sure it prepares your 

audience for what is to come. 

Here’s the bottom line on your introduction: It must be an appropriate length for your 

specific communication and it should contain a clear 

statement of your purpose and direction. 

DRAFTING THE CONCLUSION 

The conclusion is the last and often neglected part of a 

well-arranged communication. Sometimes inexperienced 

writers stop writing as soon as they finish discussing their 

last main idea. That’s not an effective conclusion. The 

conclusion is your last chance to summarize your 

communication and give your audience a sense of closure. 

An effective conclusion often summarizes the overall 

theme and main points discussed in the body. If you have 

a simple, straightforward purpose, you might want to 

emphasize it by restating it in slightly different words in 

the conclusion. If you have a complicated purpose or a 

long, involved communication, you’ll probably need to 

emphasize your main ideas and state your proposals or 

recommendations. 

For effective endings, restate the main ideas or observations or emphasize the main thrusts of 

arguments. Under no circumstances apologize for real or perceived inadequacies or inject weak 

afterthoughts. Conclude your communication with positive statements based on your preceding 

discussion. Generally, avoid bringing up new ideas in the conclusion; these belong in the body 

of your communication. Opening up new “cans of worms” will just confuse your reader. 

Introductions and conclusions: 

How long? 

The length of your introduction and

conclusion will be proportional to

the length of your overall writing

assignment. On a one-page 

assignment, they may be very short,

while lengthy staff studies or

publications may contain

introductions and conclusions that 

are several paragraphs long. 

Introductions and conclusions to

books are often an entire chapter!

Remember that introductions and 

conclusions are designed to help

your readers; use good judgment in

determining the appropriate length 

for your assignment.

Your introduction and conclusion should balance each other without being identical. To check 

this, read your introduction and then immediately read your conclusion to determine if your 

– 67 –
The Tongue and Quill 

conclusion flows logically from your introduction and whether it fulfills your purpose. An 

effective conclusion leaves you with a sense you’re justified in ending your communication. 

You’re ready to call it a day only when you assure your audience you’ve accomplished the 

purpose stated in your introduction. 

Recall our sample introduction on page 67; here’s a short conclusion derived from that 

introduction and the body (which we don’t have right now): 

As Air Force personnel, we can’t accomplish our mission without effective communication. Hopefully, this 

handbook has provided you with some practical tools to improve your communication skills, specifically

speaking and writing. Keep it handy and refer to it often as you prepare and review a variety of spoken and 

written products throughout your career. 

Even without the “body” available, you can see how the introduction and conclusion 

complement each other. 

DRAFTING THE BODY 

The body of your communication is the heart of your message. It includes your main ideas about 

your subject and supporting details under each main idea. 

The body typically consists of several paragraphs. The total number of paragraphs (and overall 

length of the body) will depend on your purpose and subject. As a general rule, write a separate 

paragraph for each main idea—you might confuse your reader if you have two or more main 

ideas in a single paragraph. In a longer communication, you may find it necessary to use more 

than one paragraph to cover one main point or idea. 

So much for a quick review of introductions, conclusions and bodies. Now, let’s dig down a 

little deeper into the paragraphs that make up the body of your communication. 

DRAFTING EFFECTIVE PARAGRAPHS 

PARAGRAPHS SHOULD CONTAIN ONE MAIN POINT 

Paragraphs are the primary vehicles to develop ideas in your writing. They serve three purposes: 

c To group related ideas into single units of thought. 

d To separate one unit of thought from another unit. 

e To alert your readers you’re shifting to another phase of your subject.

An effective paragraph is a functional unit with clusters of ideas built around a single main point 

or idea and linked with other clusters preceding and following it. It’s not an arbitrary collection 

designed for physical convenience. It performs a definite, planned function—it presents a single 

major idea or point, describes an event, or creates an impression. 

Most staff writing depends on relatively short paragraphs of three to seven sentences. If you 

follow this practice, you’ll be more likely to develop clear, easy-to-read paragraphs. The length 

of individual paragraphs will vary because some main points need more supporting details than 

others. 

– 68 –
Writing Your Draft 

In general, the flow of your paragraphs will follow the organizational pattern or format you 

selected in Step 4: “Organizing and Outlining” (Chapter 6). That is, you build your paragraphs 

to meet the structural requirements of your overall communication. But you can use analogy, 

examples, definition, and comparison and contrast to develop single paragraphs within your 

overall pattern. The guiding principle is to develop one main idea or point in each paragraph. 

TOPIC SENTENCES 

Capturing the main point of each PARAGRAPH

In staff writing, it’s helpful to start off each paragraph with a 

topic sentence that captures the subject or controlling idea of 

the paragraph. The topic sentence prepares the reader for 

the rest of the paragraph and provides a point of focus for 

supporting details, facts, figures and examples. 

In the body, don’t make your reader search for the topic 

sentences of your paragraphs. (As stated earlier, the rules 

are different for introductions and conclusions.) Since the 

topic sentence is the subject and main idea of the paragraph, 

the best place for it is up front—the first sentence. This 

helps with clarity and makes things convenient for your 

readers. Many people need only general information about 

the content of certain letters, reports and directives. 

Scanning topic sentences at the beginning of paragraphs for 

the most important ideas saves a lot of time. If your readers 

need more details, they can always read beyond your topic 

sentences. 

Once you’ve written a topic sentence, the rest of the 

paragraph should fall neatly in place. Other sentences between the topic sentence and the last 

sentence must be closely related to expand, emphasize, and support the topic sentence. In some

paragraphs, the last sentence is used to summarize key points, clinch the main idea in the 

reader’s mind, or serve as a transition to the next topic sentence. (We’ll talk more about 

transitions in the next section.) Eliminate any “extra” sentences that don’t perform one of these 

functions! 

If your readers are confused, 

check your topic sentences! 

A topic sentence announces your 

intent for a single paragraph in the 

same way a purpose statement

announces your intent for the entire 

writing assignment. 

Most readers are better able to

understand how ideas relate to each

other if they know what’s coming. 

If you’ve received feedback that 

readers have trouble understanding

the “flow” of your writing, check

your topic sentences. Does one 

exist for each paragraph? Can you 

underline it? Do they start off the 

paragraph? Do they tie back to your

purpose statement?

Though most writers will draft an entire paragraph at a time, an alternate drafting strategy is 

to first write all the topic sentences in your body. Once the topic sentences are completed, go 

back and write the rest of the paragraphs, one at a time. Drafting the topic sentences first 

requires the writer to stay focused on the “big picture” and can help produce a clear and wellorganized draft. This technique can be very useful for longer writing assignments and is 

recommended for writers who struggle to organize their writing. 

Here’s the bottom line on paragraphs in the body: Each paragraph should have one main 

point/idea captured in a topic sentence, preferably at the beginning of the paragraph. Use 

supporting ideas to prove, clarify, illustrate and develop your main point. Your objective is to 

help your readers see your paragraphs as integrated units rather than mere collections of 

sentences.

– 69 –
The Tongue and Quill 

 

– 70 –

TO CONTRAST IDEAS 

but 

yet 

nevertheless 

however 

still 

conversely

on the one hand

instead of 

neither of these 

(to) (on) the contrary

rather than 

no matter what 

much less as 

in contrast 

otherwise 

on the other hand 

in the (first) (second) place 

nor 

according to 

TO RELATE THOUGHTS 

indeed 

anyway, anyhow

elsewhere 

nearby

above all 

even these 

beyond 

in other words 

for instance 

of course 

in short 

in sum 

yet 

in reality

that is 

by consequence

notwithstanding 

nonetheless 

as a general rule

understandably 

traditionally

the reason, of course 

the lesson here is 

from all information 

at best 

naturally

in the broader sense 

to this end 

in fact

TO SHOW TIME 

immediately

presently

nearly a ... later 

meantime 

meanwhile 

afterward 

next 

as of today

this year, however 

a little later 

then last year 

next week 

tomorrow 

as of now

finally

TO ADD IDEAS

first, second, next, last, etc. 

in addition 

additionally

moreover 

furthermore 

another 

besides 

clear, too, is 

the answer does not only lie 

to all that 

more than anything else 

here are some ... facts 

now, of course, there are 

now however

TO COMPARE IDEAS 

like 

just as 

similar

this

TO SHOW RESULTS 

therefore 

as a result 

thus 

consequently

hence
Writing Your Draft 

TRANSITIONS: BRIDGES BETWEEN DIFFERENT IDEAS 

One way to make sure your paragraphs flow together, both internally and externally, is by using 

transitions in the form of words, phrases, and sentences. Internal transitions improve the flow of 

sentences within a paragraph, while external transitions link separate paragraphs together within 

the body of your communication. Though some inexperienced writers are intimidated by the 

idea of transitions, a few examples usually make the point. 

INTERNAL TRANSITIONS 

Internal transitions are one or more related words that show the relationship between ideas 

within a paragraph. Woven skillfully into your writing, internal transitions help your reader 

follow your line of thought. 

Some internal transitions show a relationship between two ideas inside a single sentence: 

“First go home and then clean your room.” 

Other internal transitions show a relationship between two or more sentences within a single 

paragraph: 

“Our plan for Saturday afternoon involves both business and pleasure. First, all the kids will come home 

at noon and we’ll eat lunch. Next, we’ll get the house cleaned—the whole mess. Finally, we’ll go out for 

ice cream and a movie.” 

Take a look at page 70 for a bulletin board of transitional words and phrases that provide the 

ideal logic links between your key points and the mind of the reader. In most cases, favor the 

short, spoken ones over the long, bookish ones. For example, use but more than however, so

more than therefore, and also more than in addition. (Note that different transitions require 

different punctuation. If you’re uncertain about the rules, check out guidelines for comma and 

semicolon usage on pages 282 and 307.) 

“The movie was too long; therefore, we left after three hours.” 

“The movie was too long, so we left after three hours.” 

There are many ways to bridge gaps in thought and move the reader from one idea to another. 

One classic transitional approach involves repetition of key words at the beginning of individual 

sentences. This is especially popular in formal or ceremonial writing or speaking. Notice how 

the writer of the following paragraph repeated simplicity, incisiveness and focus to make points 

clear: 

The effective presentation of concepts depends on simplicity, incisiveness and focus. Simplicity is 

necessary under time constraints when there’s insufficient time for complicated relationships. 

Incisiveness fixes an idea in the listener’s mind, appeals to common sense and facilitates 

understanding. Focus limits the subject to essentials, promoting the presenter’s objectives. 

Internal transitions, in the form of one or more related words, are key to a well-written paragraph 

because they guide the reader between related ideas. But how do we move from paragraph to 

paragraph? We need external transitions to knit together their main points. 

– 71 –
The Tongue and Quill 

EXTERNAL TRANSITIONS 

External transitions are typically sentences or paragraphs that guide the reader between 

separate paragraphs and major sections of your communication. 

Transitional paragraphs are usually reserved for long papers, books, and reports that contain 

major sections or chapters. They are used to summarize one section and lead the reader to the 

next section, or they introduce the next section and tie it to the preceding section. Transitional 

paragraphs are not commonly used in staff writing, but are often seen in books and academic 

essays. 

The short paragraph immediately above this section (“Internal transitions, in the form of one or 

more related words...”) is an example of a transitional paragraph. As you can see, it sums up the 

previous section on internal transitions and then introduces the new section on external 

transitions. 

Let’s look closer at transitional sentences, which you’ll probably use more frequently than 

transitional paragraphs. A transitional sentence is often used to bridge man points in two 

separate paragraphs (though not every new paragraph requires an external transition). There are 

three options of a transitional sentence bridging paragraph 1 and paragraph 2: 

1) It can be a stand-alone sentence at the end of paragraph 1. 

2) It can be a stand-alone sentence at the beginning of paragraph 2 (In this case, paragraph 2’s topic sentence 

is the second sentence in the paragraph). 

3) It can be merged with the topic sentence of paragraph 2 (In this case, the “transitional” part of the sentence 

is a separate clause at the beginning of the sentence). 

Let’s look at a situation where a transitional sentence is appropriate. Suppose we have two 

paragraphs: 

Paragraph 1 describes parking problems. 

Paragraph 2 describes potential solutions to the parking problems. 

Here’s an example of a stand-alone transitional sentence for these paragraphs: 

Fortunately, we can solve these parking problems if we offer our people some incentives to

use car pools. (transitional sentence)

If this sentence were at the end of paragraph 1 (option 1), paragraph 2 would start with a topic 

sentence written something like this: 

We can offer our personnel three incentives to participate in car pools: preferred parking 

spaces, guaranteed duty hours and distant parking for nonparticipants. (topic sentence)

If our transitional sentence were at the beginning of paragraph 2 (option 2), then our topic 

sentence would be the second sentence in paragraph 2, like this: 

Fortunately, we can solve these parking problems if we offer our people some incentives to use 

carpools. (transitional sentence) We can offer them three incentives: preferred parking spaces, 

guaranteed duty hours, and distant parking for nonparticipants. (topic sentence)

Now let’s look at our third option where we merge the transition with the topic sentence of 

paragraph 2. In this case, we have one sentence instead of two, like this: 

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Writing Your Draft 

Fortunately, we can solve these parking problems (transitional clause) by offering our people 

three incentives to participate in car pools: preferred parking spaces, guaranteed duty 

hours and distant parking for nonparticipants (topic of paragraph 2). 

Whether used at the end or beginning of a paragraph, transitional sentences can make your 

writing smoother and make your reader happier! 

HEADINGS 

Another effective way to transition from one major area to another, especially in a longer report, 

is to use headings. They allow your reader to follow along easily, even at a glance. Headings 

are also helpful when topics vary widely. Be informative and avoid relying on headings that use 

one or two vague words. You’ll note that headings are used effectively in this publication! Here 

are a couple examples. 

For: Procedures 

Try: How to Complete AF Form XXXX

For: Contractors

Try: How Much Contractors May Charge

Now that you have a good idea of how to draft “the big picture” part of your communication—

your introduction, conclusion and paragraphs in the body—it’s time to dig a little deeper. It’s 

time to look at building effective sentences within your paragraphs. 

DRAFTING EFFECTIVE SENTENCES 

To draft clear and concise sentences, choose clear and concise words and phrases to make up 

your sentences. In this section, we’ll cover some of the most important considerations when 

writing effective sentences: active voice, smothered verbs, parallel construction, misplaced 

modifiers, using the right word for the job and avoiding wordy words and phrases. Let’s get 

started with probably the most common pitfall to clear and concise sentences—not writing 

actively. 

WRITE ACTIVELY: DOERS BEFORE VERBS 

Is your active voice all bottled up? Active voice shows the subject as the actor. For example: 

The girl sang a song. By using mostly active voice, your writing is clear, concise, and alive—it 

reaches out to the reader and gets to the point quickly with fewer words. Unfortunately, many 

writers overuse passive voice. Passive voice shows the subject as receiver of the action. For 

example: A song was sung by her. Besides lengthening and twisting sentences, passive verbs 

often muddy them. Whereas active sentences must have doers, passive ones are complete 

without them. When you overuse passive voice and reverse the natural subject-verb-object 

pattern, your writing becomes lifeless. 

Your support is appreciated ... 

Requisitions should be submitted ... 

The IG team will be appointed ... 

It is requested that you submit ...

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The Tongue and Quill 

Yawn. The actor (or doer) in the sentence is either obscure, absent altogether or just lying there. 

Who appreciates? Who should requisition? Who appoints? Why not write ... 

I appreciate your support ... 

Submit your requisitions ... 

Colonel Hall will appoint the IG team ... 

Please submit ... 

THE SYMPTOMS OF PASSIVE VOICE AND THREE CURES 

How can you diagnose passive voice? You don’t have to be a grammarian to recognize passive 

voice. First, find the verb by asking yourself, “What’s happening in this sentence?” Then find 

the actor by asking, “Who’s doing it?” If the actor comes after the verb, its passive voice. Also, 

watch for these forms of the verb to be (am, is, are, was, were, be, being, been) and a main verb 

usually ending in -ed or -en. Let’s look at a few examples: 

Passive: The mouse was eaten by the cat. 

Active: The cat ate the mouse. 

Passive: Livelier sentences will be written by you.

Active: You will write livelier sentences. 

Passive: Water is drunk by everybody.

Active: Everybody drinks water.

To correct a passive sentence, try one of these cures: 

1. Put the actor (doer) before the verb. 

This: The handlers must have broken the part.

Not: The part must have been broken by the handlers.

2. Drop part of the verb. 

This: The results are in the attachment. 

Not: The results are listed in the attachment. 

3. Change the verb. 

This: The replacement has not arrived yet. 

Not: The replacement has not been received yet. 

Though most writers overuse passive voice sometimes it’s appropriate. Clear and forceful 

language may be inappropriate in diplomacy or in political negotiations. Passive voice is also 

used to soften bad news, or when the doer or actor of the action is unknown, unimportant, 

obvious or better left unnamed. Here are a few examples: 

The part was shipped on 1 June. (The doer is unimportant.) 

Presidents are elected every four years. (The doer is obvious.) 

Christmas has been scheduled as a workday. (The doer is better left unnamed.) 

The bottom line: Passive voice is wordy, indirect, unclear and reverses the natural order of 

English. Active voice is clear and concise. So, activate your writing!

As you can see, using verbs correctly—actively—is key to writing clear, concise and interesting

sentences. For that reason, let’s look at another way to keep your verbs active—don’t smother 

them! 

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Writing Your Draft 

WATCH OUT FOR SMOTHERED VERBS 

Make your verbs do the work for you. Weak writing relies on general verbs that take extra 

words to complete their meaning. Don’t use a general verb (make) plus extra words (a choice) 

when you can use one specific verb (choose). For example: 

Wordy: The IG team held a meeting to give consideration to the printing issue. 

Better: The IG team met to consider the printing issue. 

Wordy: They made the decision to give their approval. 

Better: They decided to approve it.

Here’s another tip on verbs—watch out for words ending in -ion and -ment. These are verbs 

turned into nouns. Whenever possible, change these nouns to verb forms, and your sentences 

will be shorter and livelier. For example: 

Wordy: Use that format for the preparation of your command history. 

Better: Use that format to prepare your command history.

Wordy: The settlement of travel claims involves the examination of orders. 

Better: Settling travel claims involves examining orders. 

We’ve spent a lot of time looking at verbs because they’re the most important words in your 

sentences. The bottom line: keep verbs active, lively, specific, concise, and out in front, not 

hidden. Another potential stumbling block for readers is “unparallelism.” 

USE PARALLEL CONSTRUCTION (PARALLELISM) 

Use a consistent pattern when making a list. If your sentence contains a series of items separated 

by commas, keep the grammatical construction similar—if two of three items start with a verb, 

make the third item start with a verb. Violations occur when writers mix things and actions, 

statements and questions, and active and passive instructions. The trick is to be consistent. 

Make ideas of equal importance look equal. 

Needs work: The functions of a military staff are to advise the commander, 

transmit instructions and implementation of decisions. 

 [Advise and transmit are verbs, while implementation is 

 a noun.] 

Acceptable: The functions of a military staff are to advise the commander, 

transmit instructions and implement decisions. [Parallel ideas 

 are now written in the same grammatical form.]

Needs work: The security policeman told us to observe the speed limit 

and we should dim our lights. [Parallel ideas are not written 

in the same grammatical form.] 

Acceptable: The security policeman told us to observe the speed limit and to

dim our lights. 

Needs work: Universal military values include that we should act with

integrity, dedication to duty, the belief that freedom is 

worth dying for and service before self. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

Acceptable: Universal military values include commitment to integrity, 

dedication to duty, service before self, and the belief that

freedom is worth dying for. 

If one of the items in a list can’t be written in the same grammatical structure, place it at the end 

of the sentence. In the previous example, “the belief that freedom is worth dying for” does not 

match the three-word construction of the other items, but its placement helps the sentence’s 

readability. 

Active voice, strong verbs and parallelism can help make your sentences clear and concise. 

Now, let’s look at some more things you can do to write effective sentences—using the right 

word for the job. 

USE THE RIGHT WORD FOR THE JOB 

BE CONCRETE. Without generalizations and abstractions, lots of them, we would drown in 

detail. We sum up vast amounts of experience when we speak of dedication, programs, 

hardware and lines of authority. But such abstract language isn’t likely to evoke the same

experiences in each reader’s mind. Lazy writing overuses vague terms such as immense 

dedication, enhanced programs, viable hardware and responsive lines of authority. It especially 

weakens job descriptions and performance evaluations, etc. 

Do not write “The commander will give guidance,” or “The equipment must meet specs.” Your 

reader might wonder what kind of guidance and what kind of specs? Neither you nor your 

readers can tackle the problem until you are specific. Be as definite as the situation permits. 

Include only the ideas your reader needs and then give those ideas no more words than they 

deserve. 

For Try For Try

commanders MAJCOM commanders Ford Ranger 

 headache migraine emotion love 

 car, vehicle Ford plane F-117 

 computer Pentium socialize mingle, meet 

KNOW VARIOUS SHADES OF MEANING. Use different words to express various shades 

of meaning. The writer with an adequate vocabulary writes about the aroma of a cigar, the 

fragrance of a flower, the scent of perfume or the odor of gas instead of the smell of all these 

things. 

JUDGE THE JARGON. The aim of all communication is to make a personal contact in the 

simplest possible way, and the simplest way is to use familiar, everyday words. Above all, it 

must be adapted to specific circumstances with a minimum of jargon. Jargon consists of 

“shorthand” words, phrases or abbreviations that are peculiar to a relatively small group of 

people. DEROS (Date Eligible to Return from Overseas) and AWOL (Absent Without Leave) 

are examples of military jargon. Every profession has it. NPO which means Nil Peros (nothing 

by mouth) and contusion (bruise) are examples of medical jargon. Writers often use jargon in 

their sentences to fill space and impress the naive. Unfortunately, overuse of jargon can backfire 

on you by actually confusing your reader. CAUTION! Before you use jargon, make sure you 

have carefully assessed the audience! Keep it simple with everyday words and phrases, or at 

least explain any jargon you must use. If you use an abbreviation, spell it out the first time it 

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Writing Your Draft 

appears. If it appears only twice or infrequently, spell out the term every time and avoid the 

abbreviation entirely. For more on abbreviations see Appendix 1. 

CLICHÉS. Clichés are expressions that have lost their impact because they have been 

overused. Strive for originality in your choice of words and phrases. The list below is not 

exhaustive. You just may not find your favorite here. 

acid test

add insult to injury

armed to the teeth 

as a matter of fact 

at a loss for words 

banker’s hours 

battle royal 

beat a hasty retreat

beauty and the beast 

benefit of the doubt 

better late than never 

bewildering variety

beyond the shadow of a doubt 

bite the dust 

blazing inferno 

blessed event 

blessing in disguise 

blissful ignorance 

brave as a lion 

break of day

bright and early

bull in a china shop 

burn one’s bridges 

burn the midnight oil 

burning issue 

bury the hatchet 

busy as a bee 

by the same token 

calm before the storm 

cherished belief 

clear the decks

club-welding police 

colorful scene 

conspicuous by its absence 

cool as a cucumber 

coveted award 

crack of dawn 

crack troops 

cutting edge

dramatic new move 

dread disease 

dream come true

drop in the bucket 

easier said than done 

fame and fortune 

feast or famine 

fickle fortune 

food for thought 

from the face of the earth 

gentle hint

glaring omission 

glutton for punishment 

gory details 

grief stricken 

grim reaper 

hammer out (an agreement) 

hand in glove 

happy couple 

hard as a rock 

head over heels in love 

heart of gold 

heavily armed troops 

honest as the day is long 

hook, line and sinker 

hungry as wolves 

in short supply

in this day and age 

intensive investigation 

iron out (problems) 

irony of fate 

it goes without saying 

Lady Luck 

lash out 

last but not least 

last-ditch stand 

leaps and bounds 

leave no stone unturned 

lend a helping hand 

light at the end of the tunnel 

lightening speed

limp into port 

lock, stock and barrel

long arm of coincidence (the law) 

man in the street

marvels of science 

matrimonial bliss (knot) 

meager pension 

miraculous escape 

moment of truth

more than meets the eye 

Mother Nature

move into high gear 

never a dull moment 

Old Man Winter

on more than one occasion 

paint a grim picture 

pay the supreme penalty

picture of health

pillar of (the church, society) 

pinpoint the cause 

police dragnet 

pool of blood 

posh resort 

powder keg 

predawn darkness

prestigious law firm

proud heritage

proud parents 

pursuit of excellence 

quick as a flash 

radiant bride 

red faces, red-faced 

reign supreme 

reins of government 

round of applause

rushed to the scene 

sadder but wiser

scantily clad 

scintilla of evidence 

scurried to shelter 

selling like hotcakes 

sharp as a razor 

sings like a bird 

spearheading the campaign 

spirited debate 

spotlessly clean

sprawling base, facility

spreading like wildfire

steaming jungle 

stick out like a sore thumb 

storm of protest 

stranger than fiction 

supreme sacrifice 

surprise move 

sweep under the rug 

sweet harmony 

sweetness and light 

tempest in a teapot 

tender mercies 

terror stricken 

tip of the iceberg

to no avail 

too numerous to mention 

tower of strength 

tragic death 

trail of death and destruction 

true colors 

vanish in thin air

walking encyclopedia 

wealth of information 

wave of the future 

whirlwind campaign 

wouldn’t touch with a 10- 

 foot pole

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The Tongue and Quill 

EASILY CONFUSED WORDS. Many writers and speakers frequently confuse the meaning of 

some words. Even the dictionary isn’t clear-cut and can add to your confusion. Here’s a small 

list of some easily confused words. Be on the lookout for others. 

accept verb, receive 

except verb or preposition, omitting or

 leaving out 

advice noun, counsel given, an opinion 

advise verb, to give counsel or advice 

affect verb, to influence or feign 

effect noun, result; verb, to bring about 

aggravate make worse or intensify

annoy disturb or irritate 

all ready everyone is prepared 

already adverb, by specific time 

all together collectively or in a group 

altogether wholly or entirely

alright not acceptable spelling 

all right satisfactory

allusion indirect reference 

delusion false belief 

illusion a false impression 

alumni men graduates or group of men and 

 women graduates 

alumnae women graduates 

among used when more than two alternatives 

between used when only two alternatives

amount qty that can’t be counted/measured 

 in units 

number quantity counted and measured in units 

anxious worry or fearfulness 

eager keen desire 

apt suitable, quick to learn, natural tendency

liable legally responsible 

likely refers to the probable, probability 

as a subordinate conjunction 

like a preposition 

avocation hobby

vocation customary employment 

beside preposition, next to or near 

besides adverb, in addition; preposition, 

 addition to 

bi- occurring every two (units of time) 

semi- occurring twice (during the time period) 

bring action toward the speaker 

take action away from the speaker 

can ability

may permission 

capital city or money 

capitol a building 

censor examine in order to forbid if objectionable 

censure condemn or to reprimand 

compliment praise

complement supplies a lack; it completes 

compose to constitute 

comprise to include or consist of 

consul foreign representative 

council a group 

counsel advice, to give advice 

contemptible base, worthless, despicable 

contemptuous expressing contempt or disdain 

continually closely recurrent intervals

continuously without pause or break 

credible believable

creditable deserving credit or honor 

credulous ready to believe anything 

disinterested impartial or objective 

uninterested indifferent 

eligible qualified to be chosen 

illegible unable to read 

emigrate to leave a country to settle in another 

immigrate to enter a country to settle there 

eminent noted or renowned 

imminent impending 

enervating weakening 

invigorating stimulating 

ensure guarantee 

insure obtain insurance for 

exceptional out of the ordinary

exceptionable objectionable 

farther expresses distance 

further expresses degree 

fewer refers to numbers; countable items 

less refers to mass; items can’t be counted 

formally in a formal manner 

formerly in the past 

hanged to execute; criminals are hanged 

hung suspended or nailed up; pictures are hung 

healthy possessing health 

healthful conducive to health 

wholesome healthful as applied to food or climate 

imply to hint at or suggest 

infer to draw a conclusion based on evidence 

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Writing Your Draft 

incredible unbelievable, improbable 

incredulous skeptical, doubting 

ingenious clever or resourceful 

ingenuous innocently frank or candid 

instance example 

instant moment of time 

incident event or an occurrence 

later after the usual time

latter to designate the second of two things 

 mentioned 

lay to place 

lie to recline; to stretch out 

likely a favorable probability

liable legally responsible 

apt a natural fitness or tendency

lose a verb 

loose primarily an adjective 

luxuriant abundant growth

luxurious pertains to luxury

may be a modal verb 

maybe perhaps 

moneys currency

monies amount of money

morale refers to a spirit or a mood 

moral refers to right conduct 

persecute to afflict or harass 

prosecute to pursue until finished or to bring 

 legal action against a defendant 

practical useful, sensible 

practicable feasible; a person cannot be practicable 

principal adjective, foremost; noun, main person 

principle noun, precept or idea 

raise to lift or cause to be lifted 

rise to move to a higher position 

respectively in the order given 

respectfully full of respect 

set to put or to place 

sit to occupy a seat

shape condition of being 

condition state, situation 

sometime at some unspecified time 

some time a period of time 

sometimes now and then 

specie coin 

species a kind or variety 

stationary in a fixed place 

stationery writing paper, envelopes 

than conjunction of comparison 

then adverb, at that time

their third person plural pronoun, possessive 

there adverb or interjection 

they’re contraction of they are 

verbal applies to that which is communicated in

words, spoken or written 

oral applies only to that which is spoken 

who refers to people 

which refers to things

WORDY WORDS AND PHRASES 

Many people use certain words and phrases because they think it makes them appear learned or 

they think padding emphasizes or rounds out a passage. Don’t force your reader to trudge 

through a dictionary. Also, many needless phrases are introduced by prepositions like at, on, for, 

in, to and by. They don’t give sentences impressive bulk; they weaken them by cluttering the 

words that carry the meaning. So prune such deadwood as to the purpose (to), etc. The longer it 

takes to say something, the weaker you come across. Pages 81-87 list big words or phrases and 

simpler ones to try. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

DOUBLEHEADERS. The Word by Rene J. Cappon details how to avoid writing a project’s

importance and significance when importance will do. Even a person’s success and achievement

is okay with just success. Pairs of words with similar meanings add needless bulk. Whatever the 

differences are between test and evaluate, for example, they aren’t worth calling attention to if

you just want to give a general idea. When you’re tempted to use two words, try one to say it all. 

Thomas Jefferson said: “The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when 

one will do.” 

aid and abet each and every ready and willing 

beck and call fair and just right and proper

betwixt and between few and far between safe and sound 

bits and pieces irrelevant and immaterial shy and withdrawn 

blunt and brutal nervous and distraught smooth and silky

bound and determined nook and cranny success and achievement 

clear and simple null and void sum and substance 

confused and bewildered part and parcel test and evaluate 

disgraced and dishonored pick and choose various and sundry 

REPETITIVE REDUNDANCY. Not every noun needs an adjective. Not every adjective 

needs an adverb. Not every writer has gotten the message. Keep your pencil from adding 

modifiers to those nouns that need no additional voltage. Serious danger, stern warning, deadly

poison, grave crisis are examples; the nouns operate better without the modifiers. 

absolutely conclusive

advance planning 

agricultural crops 

anthracite coal

ascend upward 

assemble together 

awkward dilemma 

basic fundamental

big in size 

bisect in two 

blend together

both alike 

capitol building

chief or leading or main

 protagonist

close proximity

coalesce together 

collaborate together or jointly

complete monopoly

completely full

completely unanimous 

congregate together 

connect together 

consensus of opinion

continue to persist 

courthouse building 

current or present incumbent 

descend downward

divisive quarrel

doctorate degree 

end result 

endorse (a check) on the back 

entirely absent

erupt violently 

exact counterpart 

fellow colleague

few in number 

first beginning

founder and sink 

free gift 

from whence 

fuse together 

future plan 

gather together 

general public

grateful thanks

habitual custom 

hired mercenary 

hoist up

individual person 

invited guest 

irreducible minimum 

join together 

knots per hour

large in size 

lonely hermit 

meaningless gibberish 

merge together 

mutual cooperation 

necessary need

new innovation 

new record

new recruit

old adage 

old antique 

opening gambit

organic life

original founder 

original prototype 

passing fad 

past history

patently obvious

personal friend 

personal opinion 

pointed barb 

present incumbent 

protrude out

real fact 

recall back

recoil back 

recur again or repeatedly 

short in length or height

shuttle back and forth

single unit

skirt around

small in size 

tall in height

two twins 

temporary reprieve 

true facts 

ultimate outcome 

universal panacea 

violent explosion 

visible to the eye 

vitally necessary

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Writing Your Draft 

SIMPLER WORDS AND PHRASES 

Instead of Try 

a great deal of................................ much

a minimum of ................................ at least 

a number of....................................some, many, few 

a period of (2 days)........................ for 

abandon ......................................... give up 

abet ................................................ help, assist, aid

abeyance (hold in)......................... delay, postpone, wait 

abridge ...........................................shorten, condense 

abrogate ......................................... do away with, abolish, cancel, 

revoke 

accelerate .......................................speed up, hasten 

accept............................................. take, receive 

accommodate................................. make fit, make room for, allow for 

accompany..................................... go with 

accomplish..................................... carry out, do, complete 

accomplish (a form) ...................... fill out, complete, produce, fill in, 

make out, prepare 

according to (an instruction) ......... per 

accordingly ....................................so, then, therefore 

accrue............................................. add, gain 

accumulate..................................... gather, amass, collect 

accurate.......................................... correct, exact, right 

achieve........................................... do, make

achieve the maximum ................... get the most from, excel 

acquire ........................................... get, gain, earn, win

activate...........................................start, drive, put into action, turn on

active consideration (to give)........ consider 

activities......................................... actions 

actual.............................................. real, true

actual emergency........................... emergency 

actual facts..................................... facts 

actuate............................................ induce, move, drive, impel 

additional....................................... added, more, other, further 

address...........................................speech, speak of, speak to, deal 

with (a problem)

adequate......................................... enough, plenty 

adjacent to...................................... next to 

advanced plans .............................. plans 

advantageous................................. helpful, useful, favorable, 

beneficial, good 

adverse to....................................... against, opposed to

advise............................................. recommend, tell, inform

advised (keep me).......................... informed (or “inform me”)

affirmative (answer in the)............ agree, assent to, say “yes” 

affix................................................ put, stick, attach, place, add 

affix a signature.............................sign

afford an opportunity..................... allow, let, permit 

after the conclusion of................... after 

agency............................................ office 

aggregate ....................................... all, total, sum, combined, whole, 

entire 

aircraft ........................................... military plane 

all of............................................... all 

allegation ....................................... charge, claim, assertion

alleviate ......................................... ease, relieve, lessen

allotment........................................share, portion

along the lines of ........................... like, similar to 

alter, alteration............................... change

alternative ...................................... choice, option, substitute 

amalgamate.................................... merge, combine, unite, mix

ambient ..........................................surrounding 

ameliorate ...................................... better, improve

and/or............................................. and, or (use whichever fits; if both

fit, use both)

annually ......................................... yearly

antedate.......................................... precede 

anticipate ....................................... expect, foresee 

antipathy ........................................ dislike, distaste 

Instead of Try 

antithesis........................................opposite, contrast 

anxiety............................................fear 

any or .............................................any 

apparent..........................................clear, plain, visible 

apparently ......................................seemingly, clearly

appear.............................................seem

appellation......................................name

append............................................add, attach

applicable.......................................which applies, proper, correct,

suitable 

application......................................use (noun) 

appreciable.....................................many

appreciate.......................................value 

apprise............................................tell, inform

appropriate .....................................proper, right, apt, suitable, 

pertinent, relevant (or delete it), fit 

approximately ................................about, nearly, almost 

are desirous of................................want to

are in receipt of..............................received 

as a matter of fact...........................in fact 

as a means of..................................to

as a result of...................................because 

as against........................................against 

as and when....................................as, when (not both)

as at present advised ......................as advised

as of (this date) ..............................by (today), today 

as prescribed by .............................under, per 

as to whether..................................whether, if

ascertain .........................................find out, learn, make sure 

assert ..............................................claim, declare 

assimilate .......................................absorb, digest, join, include

assist, assistance.............................aid, help

at a later date..................................later 

at a much greater rate.....................faster, more quickly 

at all times......................................always 

at an early date ...............................soon 

at present........................................now, currently, presently 

at such time ....................................when

at the present time..........................currently, at present, now

at the time of .................................when

at this juncture (time).....................now

at this time......................................now

at your earliest convenience ..........as soon as you can 

attached herewith is.......................here’s 

attached please find .......................here’s, attached is, enclosed is 

attain...............................................reach, gain, achieve 

attempt ...........................................try 

attempts to......................................tries 

attention is invited to .....................note, see 

attired .............................................dressed 

augment..........................................add, increase, extend, enlarge, 

expand, raise 

authored .........................................wrote 

authoritative ...................................valid, official 

authority.........................................sanction, control, guidance 

authorize ........................................allow, let, permit, empower,

prescribe 

autonomous....................................independent

avail yourself of.............................use 

availability .....................................presence, use 

based on the fact that .....................because 

be acquainted with.........................know

be cognizant of...............................know 

be of assistance to ..........................assist, help, aid

befall ..............................................happen, occur 

behest .............................................request, order 

behoove..........................................(avoid this pompous term) 

benefit ............................................help

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The Tongue and Quill 

Instead of Try 

bestow............................................ give

betterment...................................... improvement

biannual ......................................... twice a year 

biennial .......................................... once in 2 years 

bilateral.......................................... two sided

bona fide ........................................ real, genuine, sincere 

brief (in duration) ..........................short, quick, brief

brook (interference)....................... allow 

burgeoning..................................... increasing, growing

by means of ................................... by, with

by virtue of .................................... because, by, under 

came to an end............................... ended

cannot ............................................ can’t 

capability ....................................... ability 

capable .......................................... able 

care should be taken ...................... be careful, take care 

category ......................................... class, group 

characteristic.................................. trait (n), typical of (adj) 

characterize.................................... describe, portray

circuitous....................................... roundabout 

classify........................................... arrange

close proximity.............................. close, near

cognizant of .................................. aware of, know, understand, 

comprehend 

coincidentally ................................ at the same time

collaboration.................................. (see “cooperation”) 

colloquy......................................... discussion, talk 

combine ......................................... join

combined ....................................... joint 

comes into conflict ........................ conflicts 

commence...................................... begin, start 

commensurate................................ equal to, to agree with

commensurate with ....................... corresponding to, equal to, to 

agree with, according to 

communicate verbally ................... talk, discuss, say, tell 

compensate (compensation).......... pay 

comply (with)................................ follow, carry out, meet, satisfy

component ..................................... part 

comprehend ................................... grasp, take in, understand 

comprehensive............................... all-inclusive, thorough 

comprise ........................................ form, include, make up, contain

comprised of.................................. made up of, consists of

concerning ..................................... about, on 

conclude......................................... close, end, think, figure, decide

conclusion...................................... end

concur............................................ agree, approve

condition........................................state, event, facts 

conduct (verb) ............................... carry out, manage, direct, lead 

confront ......................................... face, meet, oppose 

conjecture ...................................... guess 

connection ..................................... link, tie 

connotation .................................... meaning 

consensus of opinion ..................... agreement, verdict, general, view 

consequently..................................so, therefore 

consider ......................................... look at, think about, regard 

considerable (amount)................... large, great 

consolidate..................................... combine, join, merge 

constitutes...................................... is, forms, makes up

construct ........................................ build, make

consult ........................................... ask

consummate................................... finish, complete 

contained in ................................... in

containing ...................................... has, that have, etc.

contains.......................................... has 

contemporaneously........................ at the same time

contiguous ..................................... next to, near, touching

continue ......................................... keep on

contractual agreement ................... agreement, contract 

contribute....................................... give

cooperate ....................................... help 

Instead of Try 

cooperate together..........................cooperate 

cooperation (in)..............................jointly, with 

coordination ...................................staff action, relate, agree, conform

couched ..........................................phrased, worded

course of time ................................time

criteria ............................................standards, rules, yardsticks

criterion..........................................standard, norm

currently.........................................now (or leave out)

de-emphasize .................................play down

decelerate .......................................slow down, reduce speed 

deem...............................................think, judge, hold, believe 

deficiency.......................................defect, shortage, lack

definitely........................................final 

definitize ........................................make definite 

delegate authority ..........................empower, assign

delete..............................................cut, drop

delineate.........................................draw, describe, portray, outline 

delinquent ......................................late 

demeanor........................................manner, conduct 

demise ............................................death

demonstrate....................................prove, show, explain

depart .............................................leave 

depict..............................................describe, show

deprivation .....................................loss 

deprive ...........................................take away, remove, withhold 

derive .............................................receive, take 

derogatory......................................damaging, slighting

descend...........................................go down

designate ........................................appoint, choose, name, pick, 

assign, select 

desire..............................................wish, want

detailed...........................................more, full 

deteriorate ......................................run down, grow worse 

determination .................................ruling

determine .......................................decide, figure, find

detrimental .....................................harmful 

develop...........................................grow, make, take place 

dialogue, dialog .............................talk, discussion 

dichotomy ......................................split, separation 

difficult...........................................hard

dimension.......................................size 

diminish .........................................drop, lessen, reduce, decrease 

disadvantage ..................................drawback, handicap

disallow..........................................reject, deny, refuse 

disclose ..........................................show, reveal, make known 

discontinue.....................................drop, stop, end

disseminate ....................................issue, send out, pass out, spread, 

announce, get out 

distribute ........................................spread, share, allot

divulge ...........................................make known, reveal 

do not .............................................don’t 

donate.............................................give 

downward adjustment....................decrease 

due in large measure ......................because, due to 

due to the fact that .........................because of, hence, since, due to 

duplicate.........................................copy

duration ..........................................time, period

during such time ............................while 

during the periods when ................when

echelon...........................................level, grade, rank

edifice.............................................building

educator..........................................teacher, trainer 

effect (verb) ...................................make, cause, bring about 

effect an improvement...................improve

effectuate........................................carry out, put into effect 

elaborate (on).................................expand on, develop

elapsed (time has)..........................passed

elect................................................choose, pick 

elementary......................................simple, basic 

– 82 –
Writing Your Draft 

Instead of Try 

elevated.......................................... height, altitude 

elicit ............................................... draw out, bring out, prompt,

cause 

eliminate ........................................ cut, drop, end, remove, omit, 

delete 

elimination..................................... removal, discarding, omission

elucidate......................................... explain, clarify 

emanates........................................ emits, comes from, gives out

emphasize ......................................stress, point out

employ ........................................... use 

enable............................................. let 

encompass in ................................. include, enclose 

encounter ....................................... meet, find, meeting 

encourage....................................... urge, promote, favor, persuade

end product.................................... result, product, outcome

end result ....................................... end, result, outcome 

endeavor ........................................ try, effort, action

enhance.......................................... increase, raise, heighten, improve

ensue.............................................. follow, result 

ensure............................................. make sure, see that

enumerate ...................................... count, list 

envisage ......................................... picture, view, have in mind,

regard

equally as....................................... as 

equanimity..................................... poise, balance 

equitable ........................................ fair, just 

equivalent ...................................... equal 

eradicate......................................... wipe out, remove, destroy, erase 

erroneous....................................... wrong, mistaken 

especially....................................... chiefly 

essential ......................................... basic, necessary, vital, important 

establish.........................................set up, prove, show, make, set, fix

estimate.......................................... conclude, appraise, judge 

evaluate.......................................... check, rate, test, fix the value of, 

measure, analyze, think about,

price 

evaluation ...................................... rating

eventuate........................................ result 

every effort will be made ............. (I/you/we/they) will try 

everybody, everyone ..................... each, all 

evidence......................................... fact 

evidenced.......................................showed 

evident ........................................... clear, plain, obvious 

evince.............................................show, display, express 

evolution........................................ change, growth

exacerbate...................................... make more severe, violent or 

bitter; to make worse; to aggravate 

examination ................................... checkup, test, check, search, 

questioning

examine ......................................... check, look at, test, study, inspect, 

look into 

exceed............................................ go beyond, surpass

exceedingly.................................... notable, extremely, very

excessive........................................ too much, too many

execute...........................................sign, perform, do act 

exercise (authority)........................ use 

exhaustive...................................... thorough, complete

exhibit............................................show, display 

exigency......................................... urgent demand, urgent need, 

emergency

exorbitant....................................... too much, abnormal 

expedite ......................................... hurry, rush, speed up, fast, quick, 

hasten 

expeditious..................................... fast, quick, prompt, speedy,

exercise care, watch out, take care,

use care 

expend ........................................... pay out, spend, use 

expendable..................................... normally used up or consumed,

replaceable 

expenditure .................................... (see “expense”) 

Instead of Try 

expense...........................................cost, fee, price, loss, charges 

experience has indicated................experience shows, learned

experiment .....................................test, try, trial 

expertise.........................................expert opinion, skill, knowledge 

explain............................................show, tell 

expostulate .....................................demand, discuss, object 

extant..............................................existing, current

extend.............................................spread, stretch

extensive ........................................large, wide

extenuating.....................................qualifying, justifying

external...........................................outer 

extinguish.......................................quench, put out 

fabricate .........................................construct, make, build, invent

facilitate .........................................ease, help along, make easy, 

further, aid

factor..............................................reason, cause 

failed to ..........................................didn’t 

familiarity ......................................knowledge 

familiarize ......................................inform, learn, teach

fatuous numskull............................jerk

feasible...........................................possible, can be done, workable, 

practical 

females...........................................women

final ................................................last 

finalize ...........................................complete, finish, conclude, end

firstly..............................................first 

foe ..................................................enemy 

for example ....................................such as 

for the purpose of...........................for, to

for the reason that ..........................because, since 

for this reason ................................so

for your information ......................(usually not needed) 

forfeit .............................................give up, lose 

formulate........................................make, devise, repair 

forthcoming....................................coming, future, approaching

forthwith ........................................at once, right away

fortuitous........................................by chance, lucky, fortunate 

forward...........................................send

fragment.........................................piece, part 

frequently.......................................often

fullest possible extent ....................as much as possible, fully 

function ..........................................act, role, work

fundamental ...................................basic, main, primary 

furnish ............................................give, send, provide, supply 

furthermore ....................................besides, also

future date ......................................sometime, later 

gained from the following .............obtained, learned, source 

gainsay ...........................................deny, dispute, contradict 

generate..........................................produce 

germane..........................................relevant, fitting, related 

give consideration to......................consider 

give encouragement to...................encourage, urge (see “encourage”) 

give feedback.................................respond 

give instructions to.........................instruct, direct 

give rise to......................................raise, cause, bring about 

goes without saying .......................(unnecessary) 

govern ............................................rule 

habituate.........................................accustom, make use to, adapt, 

adjust 

has the ability.................................can 

has the capability ...........................can 

has the capability of.......................is capable of, can, is able to 

have the need for............................need

have to............................................must, need to

held a meeting................................met 

henceforth ......................................until now 

hereby.............................................by this 

herein .............................................here (often unnecessary) 

heretofore.......................................until now 

– 83 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Instead of Try 

hiatus.............................................. gap, lapse 

higher degree of ............................ more 

hitherto........................................... up to now, until now 

hold in abeyance............................suspend, delay, wait 

homogeneity .................................. unity, agreement 

hopefully........................................ I hope 

however ......................................... but

identical .........................................same

identification.................................. name, designation

identify........................................... find, name, show, point out, 

recognize 

if and when .................................... if, when (not both)

ilk...................................................sort, kind

illustrate .........................................show, make clear 

immediately................................... at once, now, promptly, quickly 

imminent........................................ near 

impact ............................................ affect (verb), effect (noun) 

impacted ........................................ affected, changed, hit 

impediment.................................... block, barrier 

imperative...................................... urgent

impetus .......................................... drive, power, force

implement...................................... carry out, do, follow, complete, 

fulfill 

implication..................................... impact meaning, effect 

important ....................................... major, greater, main

impugn........................................... assail, attack, criticize 

impulse .......................................... drive, push, thrust 

in a manner similar to.................... like, in the same way, as 

in a number of cases......................some, often, at times 

in a position to............................... can

in a satisfactory manner ................satisfactorily 

in a situation in which ................... when

in accordance with......................... by, under, per, according to 

in accordance with the................... AFI 37-XXX requires, authority 

contained in AFI 37-XXX 

in addition to ................................. also, besides, too, plus

in an effort to ................................. to, so that, so

in case of........................................ if

in close proximity.......................... near, nearby, close 

in compliance with the .................. as directed, as requested, request 

in conjunction with........................ with, together 

in connection with ......................... in, with, on, about 

in favor of...................................... for 

in its entirety.................................. all of it 

in lieu of......................................... instead of, in place of

in order that ................................... for, so, so that 

in order to ...................................... to

in process of preparation ............... being prepared

in recent past.................................. lately 

in reference to................................ regarding, about, on, concerning 

in regard to..................................... about, concerning, on 

in relation to................................... about, concerning, on 

in respect to ................................... regarding, about, concerning, on 

in sufficient time............................ early enough, soon enough, far 

enough ahead 

in the amount of............................. for, of 

in the course of.............................. during, in, when

in the event of................................ if

in the event that ............................. if, in case 

in the immediate future .................soon 

in the majority of instances........... the time (case)

in the matter of .............................. in, on

in the nature of............................... like 

in the near future ...........................soon 

in the negative ............................... no, denied, disapproved

in the neighborhood of .................. about, around 

in the time of ................................. during

in the vicinity of ............................ near, around 

in view of.......................................since 

in view of the above ......................so, since, therefore

Instead of Try 

in view of the fact that...................because, as 

in this day and age .........................today, nowadays 

in this instance ...............................here (often necessary) 

in-depth ..........................................(avoid if possible) thorough,

complete

inaccurate.......................................wrong, incorrect 

inadvertently ..................................accidentally, mistakenly 

inasmuch as....................................since, because 

inaugurate ......................................start, begin, open 

inception ........................................start, beginning

incident to ......................................pertaining, connected with 

incidental........................................related, by chance

incombustible.................................fireproof, (it) will not burn 

incorporate .....................................blend, join, merge, include, 

combine, add 

increase ..........................................rise, grow, enlarge, add to

increment .......................................increase, gain, amount 

incumbent upon .............................must 

indebtedness...................................debt

indefinite ........................................vague, uncertain

indeterminate .................................vague, uncertain

indicate...........................................show, write down, call for, point

out 

indication .......................................sign, evidence 

individual (noun) ...........................person, member 

individually....................................each, one at a time, singly 

ineffectual ......................................futile, useless, ineffective 

inexpensive ....................................cheap, low-priced

infinite............................................endless 

inflammable ...................................(it) burns, flammable, burnable 

inherent ..........................................basic, natural 

inimical ..........................................hostile, unfriendly, opposed 

initial (adjective)............................first 

initially...........................................first, at first 

initiate ............................................start, begin, act 

innate..............................................basic, native, inborn 

innuendo ........................................hint 

input (provide)...............................data, thoughts. comment on, 

advise, respond 

insignificant ...................................slight, trivial, unimportant

insofar as........................................since, for, because

insomuch as ...................................since 

instance ..........................................case, example 

instantaneously ..............................instantly, at once, suddenly 

institute (verb)................................set up, start

integrate .........................................combine 

interface .........................................connect, talk, coordinate, join, 

work together, merge, joint, point 

of contact, frontier, junction,

common boundary

interpose no objection....................don’t object 

interpose objections to...................disapprove, disagree with, do not

concur with, object to 

interpret..........................................grasp, explain, understand 

interrogate ......................................question

investigate ......................................examine, study

irrespective (of the fact that)..........regardless 

is dependent upon ..........................depends on

is in receipt of ................................receives, got 

is responsible for obtaining ...........obtains 

is responsible for selection ............selects 

(is) symptomatic of........................shows 

it is..................................................(leave out) 

it is essential...................................must 

it is important to note that..............note 

it is obvious that ............................clearly, obviously 

it is possible that ............................may, possibly 

it is recommended..........................I, we recommend

it is requested .................................please, request 

jeopardize.......................................endanger 

– 84 –
Writing Your Draft 

Instead of Try 

jurisdictional authority .................. control 

justification.................................... grounds, reasons 

justify............................................. prove

juxtaposition (in) ........................... alongside, next to 

knowledge ..................................... experienced, well-trained 

legislation ...................................... law 

limitations...................................... limits 

limited number .............................. few 

locate.............................................. find

location .......................................... place, scene, site 

magnitude ......................................size, extent

maintain (maintenance)................. keep, support (upkeep) 

majority ......................................... greatest, longest, most 

make a decision ............................. decide

make a reply .................................. reply 

make a request............................... request, ask for 

make a statement ...........................state 

make an adjustment....................... adjust, resolve 

make every effort .......................... try 

make provisions for....................... provide, do

mandatory...................................... must, required

manifest (to be).............................. clear, plain

manufacture ................................... make, build

materialize ..................................... appear, take form

materially....................................... greatly 

maximal......................................... highest, greatest 

maximize ....................................... increase 

maximum....................................... most, greatest 

meets with approval ...................... is approved

mention.......................................... refer to

metamorphosis .............................. change 

minimal.......................................... least, lowest, smallest 

minimize........................................ decrease, lessen, reduce 

minimum ....................................... least. lowest, small 

mitigate.......................................... lessen, ease 

mode .............................................. way, style 

modify ........................................... change, moderate, qualify 

monitor .......................................... check, watch, oversee, regulate 

multitudinous................................. populous, large (crowd) 

more specifically ........................... for example 

most unique ................................... unique

negligible .......................................small, trifling

neophyte ........................................ new, novice 

nevertheless................................... however, even so, but

nebulous......................................... vague

necessitate...................................... cause, need, make, require, cause 

to be 

not infrequently ............................ often

not later than.................................. by, before 

not often.........................................seldom

not withstanding the fact that........ although, nonetheless, 

nevertheless 

notification..................................... announcement, report, warning 

notify.............................................. let know, tell 

numerous....................................... many, most 

objective ........................................ aim, goal 

obligate, obligatory ....................... bind, compel 

observe...........................................see 

obtain ............................................. get 

obviate ........................................... prevent, remove, rule out 

obvious .......................................... plain, clear 

of great importance........................ important

of large dimensions....................... large, big, enormous

of late............................................. lately 

of no avail...................................... useless, no use 

of the opinion (to be)..................... to believe, think

often times..................................... often

on account of................................. because 

on behalf of.................................... by, for, representing

on the basis of................................ based on

Instead of Try 

on the grounds that ........................because 

on the part of..................................for 

operate............................................run, work

operation ........................................action, performance 

operational .....................................working

optimize .........................................improve, strengthen

optimum.........................................greatest, most favorable, best 

option .............................................choice, way 

opus................................................work 

organization ...................................makeup, work site

orifice .............................................hole, vent, mouth

originate .........................................start, create, begin

outlook ...........................................view 

outstanding (debt)..........................unpaid, unresolved 

over the signature of......................signed by

overlook .........................................view, sight

parameters......................................limits, factors, boundaries 

paramount ......................................superior, supreme, principal, 

chief, outstanding

partake............................................share, take part in

participate ......................................take part 

particularize ...................................(avoid using) state in detail, 

specify, itemize 

patently...........................................evidently 

peculiar to ......................................unusual 

penitentiary ....................................prison

per annum ......................................each year, a year

perform...........................................do, act, produce, complete, finish 

period of time.................................period, time

periodic ..........................................cyclic, recurring

periphery ........................................confines, limits, perimeter 

permit.............................................let 

pernicious.......................................deadly, harmful 

personnel........................................people, staff 

pertaining to...................................about, of, on 

pertinent .........................................to the point

peruse .............................................read, study

phenomenon...................................fact, event 

pictured ..........................................shown, imagined

place ...............................................put

plaudits...........................................praise, applause, approval 

plethora ..........................................(pompous) excess, too much 

point in time...................................time, now, then

point of view..................................(usually unnecessary) 

portend ...........................................predict, mean

portent............................................sign, omen

portion............................................part, share, lot 

position ..........................................place 

positively .......................................(often unnecessary) 

possess ...........................................have, own

posterior.........................................end, rear 

postpone.........................................put off, delay 

postulate (verb)..............................claim, assert, suggest 

posture (on an issue)......................view, position, attitude 

potential (adjective).......................possible 

practicable......................................possible, workable 

practically (done)...........................almost, nearly 

precept............................................order, command, principle, rule of

action 

precipitate (adjective)....................rash, sudden, hasty, abrupt 

preclude..........................................prevent, shut out

predicament....................................fix, dilemma 

predicated on..................................based on

predominant ...................................dominant, main, chief

predominantly................................mainly, chiefly, mostly 

preeminent .....................................chief, outstanding, foremost, first

preliminary to.................................before 

premier...........................................first, leading

preparatory to ................................before 

prepared .........................................ready 

– 85 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Instead of Try 

preponderantly............................... mainly, chiefly 

presently ........................................ now, soon 

preserve ......................................... keep

prevail upon................................... persuade 

prevalent ........................................ widespread

primary .......................................... first, chief

prime.............................................. best 

prior to ........................................... before 

previous to ..................................... before 

previously ...................................... before 

probability ..................................... chance, likelihood 

problematical................................. doubtful 

procedures ..................................... rules, ways 

prioritize ........................................ (no such word) rank, rank in order 

preventative .................................. preventive 

previous......................................... earlier, past 

proceed .......................................... do, go on, try 

procure........................................... get, gain

proficiency.....................................skill, ability 

profound ........................................ deep

programmed................................... planned

prohibit .......................................... prevent, forbid

project (ed) (verb).......................... planned

promulgate..................................... announce, issue, set forth 

proportion ......................................share, part, size, amount 

proposal ......................................... plan, offer 

prototype........................................ first or original, model, pattern

provide........................................... give, say, supply, furnish 

provide for..................................... care for 

provided that.................................. if

provides guidance for.................... guides 

provisions (of a law)...................... terms 

proximity ....................................... nearness, distance 

purchase......................................... buy

purport ........................................... claim, mean

pursuant to ..................................... to comply with, in, under, per, 

according to 

purvey............................................supply, provide, sell 

purview.......................................... range, scope

quantify.......................................... count, measure, state the amount 

rationale ......................................... reason

reach a decision ............................. decide 

reason for ...................................... why 

reason is because ........................... because 

recapitulate ....................................sum up, summarize, report 

recipient......................................... receiver 

recommend .................................... propose, suggest, advance

recommendation............................ advice, thought, counsel, opinion 

reduce ............................................ cut 

referred to as.................................. called, named

reflect.............................................show, say 

regarding........................................ about, of, on 

regardless....................................... in spite of, no matter 

reimbursement............................... payment, repayment 

reiterate.......................................... repeat 

related with.................................... on, about 

relating to....................................... about, on 

relative to....................................... on, about, for 

relocation....................................... move

remain............................................stay 

remainder....................................... the rest, what remains 

remedy ........................................... cure 

remittance ...................................... payment 

remove ........................................... take away, take off, move

remuneration.................................. pay, payment 

render............................................. give, make, report

repeat again.................................... repeat, do again

replete ............................................ full, filled 

represent ........................................stand for, depict 

reproduce, reproduction ................ copy 

request ........................................... ask, please 

Instead of Try 

require ............................................must, need, call for 

requirement....................................need

requisite..........................................needed

reside..............................................live 

retain ..............................................keep

return..............................................go back

review.............................................check, go over 

rudiments .......................................first steps, basics 

salient.............................................main, important

salutary...........................................good, healthy 

sans.................................................without 

satisfactory.....................................fine, good, good enough 

saturate ...........................................soak, fill 

scant ...............................................little, only 

scrupulous......................................careful 

scrutinize........................................study carefully, look into 

segment..........................................part 

seldom ever....................................seldom

selection .........................................choice 

serves to .........................................acts, helps, works 

significance ....................................meaning, point, importance 

significant ......................................main, great, major, marked, 

signify ............................................mean, show (verb)

similar to ........................................like 

sine qua non ...................................essential 

situated...........................................placed, located, situation, work 

assignment, state 

small in size ...................................small 

so as to ...........................................to

solicit..............................................ask for 

solitary ...........................................lone, single 

somewhat .......................................(usually padding)

specifications.................................terms, details, conditions 

specify............................................list 

square in shape...............................square 

state (verb) .....................................say 

statutory .........................................legal 

still remains....................................remains 

stimulate.........................................stir, arouse 

stipend............................................salary, payment, fee 

strict accuracy ................................accuracy

subordinate (verb)..........................to lower, subdue 

subordinate commands..................their commands 

subsequent to .................................after, later, next

submit.............................................offer, give, send

substantial ......................................large, real, strong, much, solid 

substantiate ....................................prove, support 

substitute (verb).............................replace 

succor.............................................help, aid

succumb .........................................die, yield

such ................................................similar, like 

such as............................................like, that is 

sufficient ........................................enough, ample 

subsequently ..................................after, later, then, next

stringent .........................................tight, strict 

subject............................................the, this, your

subject to examination...................check, examine, verify

sufficiently in advance...................early enough 

sum total.........................................sum, total 

superfluous.....................................extra, too much, useless 

supervise ........................................manage

supposition.....................................belief, thought, idea

surmise ...........................................think, guess, suppose 

susceptible to ................................open to, subject to

symptom ........................................sign

synthesis.........................................merging, combining

synthesize.......................................put together, group, assemble 

tabulation .......................................table 

take action......................................act 

take appropriate measures .............please 

take necessary action .....................act 

– 86 –
Writing Your Draft 

Instead of Try 

take necessary steps....................... do

technicality .................................... detail, fine point 

technique ....................................... way, method 

tender (verb) .................................. offer, give

tentative ......................................... uncertain

terminate........................................ end, stop

terrible disaster.............................. disaster 

that ................................................. (leave out) 

that aforesaid ................................. (usually unnecessary) given or 

said above 

the fact that .................................... (usually unnecessary) that 

the following ................................. this, these 

the foregoing ................................. these, those, (something) above 

the fullest degree possible ............. fully, as much as possible 

(the) provisions of ......................... (leave out) 

the question as to whether............. whether 

the undersigned is desirous of....... I want 

(the) use of..................................... (leave out) 

thence............................................. from there 

therapy ........................................... treatment

there are ......................................... (leave out) 

there is ........................................... (leave out) 

thereafter........................................ after that, afterwards, then

thereby ........................................... by that, by it 

therefore.........................................so

therein............................................ in (usually unnecessary) 

thereof............................................ of, its, their 

thereon ........................................... on (usually unnecessary) 

thereto............................................ to that, to it 

thereupon....................................... at once 

thirdly ............................................ third

this office....................................... us, we 

this point in time............................ now

thither............................................. there 

through the use of.......................... by, with 

thus ................................................so

thwart............................................. frustrate, block, stop, hinder 

time period/frame .......................... time, period, span

timely basis.................................... promptly, fast, quickly 

to be aware of................................ know 

to effectively direct........................ to direct 

to the extent that ............................ as far as, so much that 

transcend........................................ go beyond 

transformation ............................... change

transmit..........................................send

transparent ..................................... clear 

transpire ......................................... happen, occur 

transport......................................... carry, move

transverse....................................... crosswise 

trauma ............................................shock

true facts........................................ facts 

type ................................................ (leave out) 

ultimate.......................................... final, end

ultimately....................................... in the end, finally 

under advisement........................... (avoid) being considered 

under separate cover...................... (usually necessary) 

underprivileged.............................. poor, deprived 

understand ..................................... know 

unintentionally............................... by mistake, mistakenly, 

accidentally 

until such time as........................... until, when 

upgrade .......................................... improve 

upon ............................................... on 

Instead of ............................... Try 

upward adjustment.........................raise, increase 

usage ..............................................use 

utilize, utilization ...........................use, employ 

validate...........................................confirm

value...............................................cost, worth

variation .........................................change

velocity...........................................speed

vend................................................sell 

verbatim.........................................word for word, exact 

veritable .........................................(padding—usually unnecessary) 

very ................................................(usually unnecessary) 

very far...........................................distant, remote 

very hot ..........................................torrid, scorching, fiery 

very large .......................................enormous, immense, huge, spacious, 

vast 

very last..........................................last 

very least........................................least 

very near ........................................adjacent, close 

very pretty......................................gorgeous, beautiful 

very quiet .......................................still, silent 

very small.......................................tiny, puny 

very strong .....................................powerful, potent, forceful

very stupid .....................................dense, moronic, idiotic, stupid

very weak.......................................exhausted, frail, flimsy, inadequate 

via...................................................in, on, through, by way of 

viable..............................................workable, capable of growing or

developing (does not mean: feasible, 

advisable, workable, achievable, 

effective or practical) 

vicinity of.......................................close, near 

vicissitudes.....................................ups and downs, changes, difficulties 

vie...................................................compete 

virtually..........................................almost 

visualize .........................................see, imagine, picture 

vitiate .............................................weaken, spoil, impair, debase 

voluminous ....................................bulky, large 

warrant ...........................................call for, permit 

whence ...........................................from where 

whenever........................................when, each time

whereas ..........................................since, while 

whereby..........................................by which

wherein...........................................in which, where 

wherever ........................................where 

wherewithal....................................means 

whether or not................................whether, if

will be effected ..............................will be done 

will make use of.............................will use 

with a view to.................................to, for 

with due regard for (or to) .............for 

with reference to ............................on, about 

with regard to ................................about, on, regarding, concerning 

with the exception of .....................except, except for, but

with the purpose of ........................to

with the result that .........................so

within the purview of.....................under 

withstand........................................stand, resist 

witnessed........................................saw 

/ ......................................................and, or

– 87 –
The Tongue and Quill 

We’ve been looking a lot at how to write clear and concise sentences—what to do and what to 

avoid. Before we leave this section on effective sentence writing, there are two more areas we 

need to cover that have an impact on readability—sentence length and using questions. 

SENTENCE LENGTH

The purpose of words on paper is to transfer thoughts in the simplest manner with the greatest 

clarity. You should avoid long, complicated sentences over 20 words (average is 17 words). 

Break up long, stuffy sentences by making short sentences of dependent clauses or by using lists. 

Short sentences increase the pace; long ones usually retard it. The key is to vary your pattern 

since constant use of either form can be monotonous. 

ASK MORE QUESTIONS 

Use questions now and then to call attention to what you want. You’re actually reaching out to 

your reader when a sentence ends with a question mark. In a longer communication, a question 

can definitely be a welcome change. Can you hear how spoken a question is?

Well, that’s it—the general guidance for writing your first draft. You now have some great 

guidance on using the three part structure (introduction, body and conclusion) and writing 

effective paragraphs and sentences. As promised earlier in this chapter, under Drafting Basics, 

we briefly mentioned “writer’s block.” We didn’t give you any solutions, but we’re going to 

give you some now. When you sit down to start on your first draft, don’t waste time staring at a 

blank screen or paper—try some of the tips on page 89. 

– 88 –
Writing Your Draft 

ADVICE ON OVERCOMING WRITER’S BLOCK 

If you occasionally suffer from writer’s block, you’re not alone—even experienced writers have

a hard time getting started. Before we get to some cures, exactly what is writer’s block? It’s a 

temporary inability to get words on paper (or on the computer). Like many other problems, it 

has a life cycle—denial, despair, acceptance and recovery. What leads to writer’s block, 

anyway? There are five fears that can cause it: fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of success, 

fear of offending and fear of running dry (out of ideas). So now that we know what writer’s 

block is and what causes it, what can we do about it?

In most cases we just need a gentle nudge to get us back on track. In her book The Complete 

Idiot’s Guide to Creative Writing, Laurie E. Rozakis, PhD, provides several suggestions on how 

to overcome writer’s block. Here are some of her ideas, as well as some of our own: 

♦ Brainstorm or “free write” to get your creative juices flowing. Just get the words down as 

fast as they come, preferably on the computer so they will be easy to edit. Spill your brains, 

don’t worry about punctuation—just get it down. Stick pretty close to your outline. Don’t 

revise. Don’t polish. If your outline is comprehensive, you may only need to string the ideas 

together with brief transitions. If your outline is a series of key words in a logical pattern, 

you’ll have to fill in the larger blanks. 

♦ Start wherever you want. Don’t feel you need to start with the introduction; some writers do 

that section last. The key here is to just start writing. Try starting with the part that’s easiest 

to write. 

♦ On a similar note, try writing just the topic sentences for each paragraph. Once you do this, 

the other, support sentences will start really flowing. 

♦ Avoid procrastination. Waiting until the last minute just increases your “blockage”! 

♦ If page length, word count, or some other constraint is holding you back, forget about it on 

the first draft. You can reshape later, once you have something to revise. 

♦ Tell your ideas to a friend. 

♦ Briefly do some mindless activity—but only briefly! 

♦ Try changing your writing mode—if using the computer, try writing longhand and visa versa. 

♦ Use visuals, like pictures or diagrams, to show what you mean. This can help ignite your 

ideas and thoughts. Then, you can write them. 

♦ Develop rituals or routines to get in the mood for writing—a cup of coffee, an early arrival at 

the office, etc. 

♦ If you work in a crowded or noisy office, try using earplugs to cut down on noise and 

distractions. It may sound strange, but it really works! 

– 89 –
The Tongue and Quill 

SUMMARY 

Writer’s block is very common and usually very temporary and curable. There are lots of ways 

to overcome it. Hopefully, the tips here will help you. Always remember—writing should be 

fun, not frightening! 

Congratulations! The most difficult task is over—you’ve successfully written the dreaded first 

draft. Take a break and step back from your draft. When you come back, you’ll be ready to 

revise and edit it. 

Is it writer’s block, or 

just a lack of focus? 

– 90 –
CHAPTER 8 

STEP 6: 

EDITING 

YOUR DRAFT 

This chapter covers: 

• Editing fundamentals: our goals and some advice on how to get there. 

• Edit in multiple steps—always start with the big picture. 

• Common grammatical problems to check for when editing. 

Spotting problems in our own writing is not easy. Many of us take great pride in what we write. 

Once our words are on paper, we resent the suggestion that something could be wrong. We

don’t like to check and change the words, the organization, the limits of the subject, the spelling, 

the punctuation or anything else, and we often have trouble making time to edit properly. 

Yet editing is critical. Take the time to make sure you have a cohesive, clear, error-free product 

that the audience can relate to. Here’s the good news: if you completed the steps described in 

Chapters 3-7, the editing will be a lot easier... and at this point, you’re almost home free. 

“... When you revise from the top down, from global structure to paragraphs to

sentences to words, you are more likely to discover useful revisions than if you start 

at the bottom with words and sentences and work up.” 

 — The Craft of Research 

– 91 –
The Tongue and Quill 

A NOTE ON EDITING (STEP 6) VERSUS FEEDBACK (STEP 7) 

In the “Seven Steps for Effective Communication,” we 

recommend that you edit your own writing before 

asking for feedback from someone else. There are 

many reasons to do this. For one, it develops your 

own editing skills—you’ll be better prepared for those 

times when you don’t have access to a second opinion. 

Second, it shows respect for the people you’re seeking 

feedback from. Why should someone else invest time

and effort to improve your writing if you aren’t willing 

to do so yourself? Finally, you’ll catch the worst 

mistakes and avoid embarrassing yourself in front of 

your coworkers. It never hurts to put the most 

professional product you can out for review, even if 

the review is an informal one. In this chapter, we’ll 

assume it’s just you and your draft. In Chapter 9, 

we’ll talk more about seeking feedback from others. 

WHAT’S OUR EDITING GOAL? 

This is the easy part. Remember the FOCUS 

principles from Chapter 1? Good editing all relates to those principles and will tell you how well 

you followed the steps for effective writing. As you read through this chapter on editing, keep 

FOCUS in mind. Here are the principles again for your review: 

FOCUS Principles 

Strong Writing and Speaking: 

Focused 

Address the issue, the whole issue, and 

nothing but the issue. 

Organized 

Systematically present your information

and ideas. 

Clear 

Communicate with clarity and make 

each word count. 

Understanding

Understand your audience and its 

expectations. 

Supported 

Use logic and support to make your

point. 

EDITING FUNDAMENTALS 

When you edit, there are a few key rules to remember: 

1. EDIT WITH FRESH EYES. Give yourself some time between drafting and editing. By that 

we mean put the draft on a shelf, in a desk drawer or under a paperweight and let it sit a spell, 

preferably for several hours for shorter projects and at least a day for longer ones. After this 

down time you’ll come back fresh and will be more likely to catch errors. 

2. REVIEW THE BASICS. Take the time to review earlier sections on writing tone (pages 23-

24), drafting clear and concise sentences (pages 73-88), common grammatical errors (pages 97-

101), and any other material that represents a problem area for you. Editing is your last chance 

to apply the guidelines you’ve read about in earlier chapters. If the concepts are fresh in your 

mind when you start editing, you’ll be better able to spot problems in your draft. 

3. SLOW DOWN AND TAKE YOUR TIME. You aren’t in a race. If you read at your normal 

pace you’re more likely to miss errors. Try different approaches to slow yourself down, 

including reading aloud and reading one line at a time using a “cover” to hide the rest of the 

page. If you’re checking for misspelled words, move backwards through a sentence. 

– 92 –
Editing Your Draft 

4. REMEMBER YOUR READERS. Try to put yourself in the role of your audience as you 

edit. You may catch some areas that may need revision if you read it from their perspective and 

knowledge base. Also consider your secondary audience—even if you’ve got your primary 

audience targeted correctly, are you unnecessarily insulting others that may end up reading this? 

5. START WITH THE BIG PICTURE, then work down to the details. When you begin to edit, 

don’t focus in on the nitty-gritty—look at the big picture first. Misuse of “there” and “their” is 

really not that important if your paper lacks cohesion, is poorly organized or fails to include a 

clear purpose statement. Again, anyone can use spellchecker, but a well-edited paper requires 

much more and begins with The Big Picture. 

EDITING EFFICIENTLY ... A THREE STEP APPROACH 

One way to make sure you edit efficiently is to read your document at least three times to allow 

yourself to really look hard at the problem areas that could botch your product. In the first pass, 

look at the big picture; in the second pass, look at paragraph construction; and the third pass, 

look at sentences, phrases and words. 

FIRST PASS: THE BIG PICTURE 

“If it needs major surgery, it’s best to know early!” 

In this first “go around” you should be paying attention to the arrangement and flow of ideas. 

Here are some areas to think about: 

Review: 

Elements of an Introduction 

In Chapter 7 (pages 66-67) we

described how an introduction 

often begins with optional stagesetting remarks that grab the 

reader’s attention. The 

introduction should include your 

purpose statement, which 

informs the reader where you are 

going and why you are going 

there (readers love this!). The 

introduction often contains an 

overview of the main point(s) 

covered in the body. 

These are just guidelines: the

composition of an introduction 

should be tailored to the 

assignment. 

Check your tasking and purpose. 

• What was my original tasker? Check the wording one 

more time.

• What is my purpose statement? For short assignments, 

underline it in your draft. For longer assignments, write it 

down on a separate sheet of paper and refer to it 

throughout the editing process. 

• Does the purpose statement “answer the tasker,” or 

does it miss the point?

Check your introduction. 

• Does it exist and does it contain my purpose 

statement? 

• Is it an appropriate length? (typically one paragraph 

long for assignments)

• Does my purpose statement and introduction give the 

readers a good idea of what they are about to read? 

– 93 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Compare your introduction and conclusion. 

• First read your introduction and then read your conclusion. 

• Do they sound like they go together without being identical? Does the introduction declare 

your purpose and does your conclusion show your readers you’ve accomplished your purpose? 

• Do you let your readers down gradually? Or do you stop with a jerk? 

• Does the conclusion sum up your point? Don’t introduce any new ideas here—you’ll leave 

your readers hanging in limbo! 

Organizational Editing Check

Some writers can write powerful and clear

sentences but have trouble keeping “on target” 

in their communication. Their main editing

challenge isn’t grammar; it’s the big picture. 

If this sounds like you or someone you know, 

try this simple editing check. 

Note: This editing check assumes you 

followed the paragraph construction 

guidelines from the previous chapter and 

placed the topic sentence at the beginning of

each paragraph. 

Read the following sections out loud: 

• Your complete introduction.

• The first sentence of each paragraph in the 

body, in order of appearance.

• Your complete conclusion. 

Does it answer the question? Does it stay on 

message? Does it flow well? If so, 

congratulations! It looks like you’ve got the 

big picture in place ... now you need to check 

your paragraph construction. 

Check overall page count and length. 

• What are my audience’s expectations

regarding page count? Am I on target? Will 

I have to make this draft significantly longer 

or shorter?

• Check the scope and flow of paragraphs 

in your body. 

Check for relevance and completeness. 

• Do the paragraphs clearly relate to the 

thesis statement? 

• Are some paragraphs irrelevant or 

unnecessary?

• Am I missing any main points in this 

assignment? 

• Are paragraphs arranged in a consistent 

order?

• How does your draft compare with your 

original outline?

SECOND PASS: PARAGRAPH 

STRUCTURE AND CLARITY 

After your first pass, you know the paper contains what it needs to do the job. In the second 

pass, you will check whether the main points and supporting ideas are appropriately organized in 

paragraphs. 

Let’s take a close look at individual paragraphs in the body of your writing. For each paragraph, 

ask the following questions: 

Unity of Focus 

• Is there one, and only one, main point of the paragraph?

• Is all the information in the paragraph related enough to be in the same paragraph? 

• Can you identify the central idea of each paragraph?

– 94 –
Editing Your Draft 

Topic Sentence 

• Does the paragraph have a topic sentence—one sentence that captures the central idea of the 

paragraph?

• Is the topic sentence the first sentence of the paragraph? (Or, if you’re starting with a 

transitional sentence, the second sentence?) 

Supporting Ideas 

• Do sentences expand, clarify, illustrate and explain points mentioned or suggested in each 

main idea? Your goal is to lead the reader in a smooth, step-by-step process to each main 

idea.

• Are there enough details in the paragraph to support the central idea?

• Are there any “extra sentences” that seem to be irrelevant to the main point?

• Do all transitional words, phrases, and clauses improve the flow and show proper 

relationships? 

• Do most paragraphs contain three to seven sentences?

If you did a lot of rearranging of paragraphs in this step, try the organizational editing check on 

the previous page—just to make sure you’re on track. 

THIRD PASS: SENTENCES, PHRASES AND WORDS 

Now you’re ready to look at the details. Though you’ve probably corrected some minor errors in 

the first two passes, now is the time to really concentrate on the “small stuff” that can sabotage 

your communication: passive voice, unclear language, excessive wordiness, grammatical errors 

and spelling mistakes. Some of these concepts were covered in the chapter on drafting; while 

others will be introduced in this section. 

Let’s start with some general advice. Read the paper out loud. Reading the paper out loud will 

increase your chances of catching errors because it requires you to slow down and use two 

senses—seeing and hearing. What one sense misses, the other may pick up! 

Listen to the sound of words, phrases and sentences. Remember, the quicker your audience can 

read and understand it, the better. If you have to read a sentence two or three times, chances are 

they will too. Not good! 

– 95 –
The Tongue and Quill 

DRAFTING BASICS: DID YOU APPLY THEM? 

As part of your editing step, you need to check some of the same concepts discussed in the 

previous chapter on drafting. Remember these guidelines, and refer back to the referenced pages 

if you need more details or additional examples. 

1. Write in active voice (pages 73-74). In active voice, the subject comes first in the sentence. 

In passive voice, the “doer” or subject of the sentence shows up late in the sentence or is missing 

entirely. Avoid overusing passive voice; it often creates lengthy and confusing sentences. 

Passive: Captain Smith was given a choice assignment by his career field monitor. 

Active: The career field monitor gave Captain Smith a choice assignment.

2. Avoid smothered verbs (page 75). Use one specific verb instead of a general verb and 

several extra words. 

Smothered: This directive is applicable to everyone who makes use of the system. 

Better: This directive applies to everyone who uses the system.

3. Check for misspelled or commonly misused words (pages 78-79). In today’s computer 

age, your software’s spell checker is your first line of defense against misspelled words. Still, 

you can get into trouble by misusing synonyms or easily confused words like “there” and “their” 

and “accept” and “except.” Spell check will not flag these words because they are spelled 

correctly, but used in the wrong context. When in doubt, check the dictionary—it still exists!

4. Use parallel construction (parallelism) in lists and series (pages 75-76). Use a similar 

grammatical construction within a list or series. Make items of equal importance look equal. If 

one starts with a verb, start the other with a verb. If three items in a list are commands, make the 

fourth a command. Parallelism helps make sentences clear. 

Needs work: Remember the following when editing: write in active voice, parallelism, smothered

verbs should be avoided, and spelling. 

Better: Remember the following when editing: write in active voice, use parallel construction in 

lists, avoid smothered verbs, and check for misspelled words. 

5. Avoid unnecessary redundancy and word doublings (page 80). 

Don’t use one word to modify another unless both add value. 

Needs work: Repetitive redundancy hurts readability. 

Better: Redundancy hurts readability.

Don’t use two nearly identical words unless both add value. 

Needs work: We must comply with the standards and criteria for controlling and reducing

environmental pollution.” 

Better: We must comply with the standards for reducing environmental pollution.” 

– 96 –
Editing Your Draft 

COMMON GRAMMAR TRAPS... 

Grammatical errors can confuse your readers and undermine the credibility of your 

communication. We’ve listed some of the most common mistakes below—look out for them

when editing your work. 

1. MISPLACED MODIFIERS 

 A modifier is a group of words that describes another group of words within the sentence. 

Modifiers should be placed near the words they describe. Improperly placed modifiers can 

create ambiguity or imply an illogical relationship. There are two kinds of misplaced modifiers: 

dangling and ambiguous. 

a. Dangling modifiers literally hang illogically on sentences, usually at the beginning. 

They are placed so they seem to modify the wrong word and, thus, show an illogical 

relationship. To correct a dangling modifier, either place the modifier next to the word it 

modifies or change the subject of the sentence to clarify your intent. 

Confusing: Approaching the flight line from the east side, the operations building can be easily 

spotted by a pilot. [The operations building doesn’t approach the flight line—the pilot 

does!]

Better: A pilot approaching the flight line from the east side can easily spot the operations

building. 

Confusing: To make a climbing turn, the throttle is opened wider. [The throttle doesn’t make a 

climbing turn.]

Better: To make a climbing turn, open the throttle wider. [The subject you is understood.]

b. Ambiguous modifiers seem to modify two different parts of a sentence. Readers can’t 

tell whether they modify words that come before or after them. To correct an ambiguous 

modifier, place the word so its relationship can’t be misinterpreted. 

Confusing: People who drive cars to work occasionally can expect to find a parking space. 

Better: People who occasionally drive cars to work can expect to find a parking space. 

Confusing: Although working conditions improved slowly employees grew dissatisfied. 

Better: Although working conditions slowly improved, employees grew dissatisfied. [Case #1: 

the conditions improved slowly] 

Better: Although working conditions improved, employees slowly grew dissatisfied. [Case #2: 

employee morale dropped slowly] 

– 97 –
The Tongue and Quill 

2. ERRORS IN SUBJECT-VERB AGREEMENT 

Plural subjects take plural verbs and singular subjects take singular verbs. Another way to 

state this rule using grammatical terms is “Subjects and verbs must agree in number.” 

The key to avoiding most problems in subject-verb agreement is to identify the subject of a 

sentence, determine whether it’s singular or plural, and then choose a verb in the same number 

and keep it near its subject. 

Generally subjects that end in s are plural, while verbs that end in s are singular. (There are 

exceptions to this rule—for example, the word ballistics is singular.) 

a. Phrases between the subject and verb do not change the requirement that the verb must 

agree in number with its subject. 

An inspection team consisting of 36 people is investigating that problem.

A general, accompanied by 3 colonels and 15 majors, is attending the conference. 

b. A linking verb agrees with its subject, not with its complement. 

The commander’s main problem is untrained Airmen. 

Untrained airmen are the commander’s main problem.

c. A compound subject consists of two or more nouns or pronouns joined by one of these 

conjunctions: and, but, or, for or nor. Some compound subjects are plural; others are not. Here 

are guidelines for subject-verb agreement when dealing with compound subjects: 

• If two nouns are joined by and, they typically take a plural verb. 

The Air Force and the Army are two components of the nation’s defense forces. 

• If two nouns are joined by or, nor, or but, the verb should agree in number with the 

subject nearest it. 

Either the President or his cabinet members are planning to attend. 

Either the cabinet members or the President is planning to attend. 

• Use a singular verb for a compound subject that is preceded by each or every. 

Every fighter pilot and his aircraft is ready for the mission. 

Each boy and girl brings a snack to school. 

• Use a singular verb for a compound subject whose parts are considered a single unit. 

The Stars and Stripes was flown at half-mast at the Headquarters building. 

Ham and eggs is a delicious breakfast. 

d. Use a singular verb with collective nouns (and noun phrases showing quantity) treated as a 

unit, but a plural verb when treated as individuals. 

The thousand wounded is expected to arrive soon. [A quantity or unit] 

A thousand wounded were evacuated by air. [Individuals] 

– 98 –
Editing Your Draft 

e. Use singular verbs with most indefinite pronouns: another, anybody, anything, each, 

everyone, everybody, everything, neither, nobody, nothing, one, no one, someone, somebody and

something. 

Everyone eats at the cafeteria. 

The President said everybody was welcome to join. 

Everyone in the squadron takes a turn leading a service project. 

f. With all, any, none and some, use a singular or plural verb, depending on the content. 

All of the money is reserved for emergencies. [singular-equivalent to “The money is reserved for

emergencies.”]

When the men arrive, all go straight to work. [plural—equivalent to “The men go straight to work”] 

All are expected to have a tour of duty overseas. 

3. ERRORS IN PRONOUN REFERENCE (“Pronoun-Antecedent Agreement”)

A common error in pronoun use involves 

agreement in number. If the noun is singular, 

the pronoun is singular. If the noun is plural, 

the pronoun should be plural, too. 

Grammar Review: Pronouns 

Pronouns are words that replace nouns and 

refer to a specific noun. The noun being 

referred to or replaced by the pronoun is 

called the antecedent. Some examples: 

SSgt Smith is our nominee for the award and 

he has a good chance of winning.

[SSgt Smith is the antecedent; he is a pronoun 

replacing the noun later in the sentence.] 

Three lieutenants arrived late to the meeting. 

Their boss was not happy with them. 

[Three lieutenants is the antecedent; Their

and them are pronouns replacing the 

antecedent in the next sentence.]

Let’s look at an example of an incorrect 

pronoun reference:

Incorrect: Everyone should bring their books to

class. [Everyone is singular, while their is plural.] 

When correcting such a sentence, try for 

gender inclusive language. Often the best 

approach is to make the subject plural and 

keep the pronoun unchanged: 

Correct: All students should bring their books to

class. 

Of course, using his or her is also acceptable, but it gets cumbersome when overused: 

Also correct: Everyone should bring his or her books to class. 

With a compound subject joined by and, use a plural pronoun: 

My advisor and I can’t coordinate our schedules. [our is a plural pronoun] 

When parts of an antecedent are joined by “or” or “nor,” make the pronoun agree with the 

nearest part: 

John or Steve should have raised his hand. 

Neither the student nor his roommates will have their deposit returned. 

– 99 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Avoid awkward phrasing by placing the plural part second if one part of the antecedent is 

singular and one part is plural. 

Awkward: Neither my parents nor my sister has stayed on her diet. 

Better: Neither my sister nor my parents have stayed on their diet. 

Remember that embedded descriptive phrases can be tricky: 

Incorrect: He is one of those ambitious people who values promotion over personal ethics. [Values

should be value because the pronoun who refers to people, not one. Clarification: he is one, but not 

the only one, of many ambitious people.]

Here are some other examples of incorrect pronoun reference: 

• The Air Force maintains different types of numbered forces, but the organization of its

headquarters is similar. [Its should be their to refer correctly to types.] 

• The committee plans to submit their report by the end of the month. [Their should be its

because committee functions as a single unit in this sentence.] 

4. COMMA PLACEMENT AROUND PARENTHETICAL EXPRESSIONS

There are many rules about using commas to punctuate sentences, and we recommend you check 

out Appendix 1 for the complete list. One class of common mistakes is nearly universal and 

worth covering in this chapter—placement of commas around groups of words that interrupt the 

sentence’s flow. Here’s the basic rule: 

Enclose nonrestrictive or parenthetical expressions with commas. 

What does this mean? If an expression (a group of words) can be removed from the sentence 

without changing its meaning, then enclose the expression with commas. 

Though the rule is simple, applying the rule requires some judgment. Advocates of open 

punctuation would argue that if the group of words does not “significantly” interrupt the 

sentence, you don’t need commas. (See pages 274-275 for more about the open and closed 

punctuation debate). Another judgment area is deciding which expressions are restrictive and 

which are nonrestrictive. A restrictive expression limits or restricts the meaning of the words it 

applies to, so it can’t be removed from the sentence without changing the meaning. A 

nonrestrictive expression merely adds additional information. Here’s the bottom line: If you 

can remove the expression from the sentence without changing the meaning, it is a nonrestrictive 

expression that should be enclosed by commas. 

Which punctuation is correct?

1. People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. 

2. People, who live in glass houses, shouldn’t throw stones. 

Answer #1 is correct. The expression who live in glass houses is restrictive. If you eliminate it, 

the sentence changes meaning: People shouldn’t throw stones. 

– 100 –
Editing Your Draft 

Which punctuation is correct?

1. My friend the architect who lives in a glass house has a party every year. 

2. My friend the architect, who lives in a glass house, has a party every year. 

The correct answer depends on your situation. If you are in the Air Force and have one friend 

who is an architect, then answer #2 is correct. The expression who lives in a glass house is 

nonrestrictive—it provides information that is not essential to the sentence’s meaning, and it can 

be removed without impact. On the other hand, if you work in an architecture firm and all your 

friends are architects, then answer #1 is correct. In this case the expression identifies which one 

of your architect friends has a party every year—it’s the one who lives in a glass house. 

Though there’s some judgment involved in deciding if something is nonrestrictive, once you 

decide to enclose an expression, don’t forget one of the commas. 

Incorrect: The new faculty, including the civilians must show up at 0600 tomorrow for physical 

training. 

Correct: The new faculty, including the civilians, must show up at 0600 tomorrow for physical 

training. 

Incorrect: Grammar errors including misplaced commas, inhibit writing clarity. 

Correct: Grammar errors, including misplaced commas, inhibit writing clarity.

– 101 –
The Tongue and Quill 

PROOFREADING MARKS AND ABBREVIATIONS 

Is there a simpler way to make a point? Did I use acceptable grammar? Are all ideas clearly 

stated? Have I applied standard practices in sentence construction and mechanics? You have 

your work cut out for you! Here are some proofreading marks and abbreviations that will help 

you to edit your own or someone else’s written work. 

– 102 –
Editing Your Draft 

ABBREVIATIONS: 

agree Pronoun and antecedent or subject and verb do not agree 

amb Ambiguous meaning 

awk Awkward construction 

Cap Faulty capitalization 

clear? Meaning unclear 

CS Comma splice 

dead Deadhead word; eliminate it 

dng Dangling modifier 

EX Examples: the writer needs to provide examples 

frag Sentence fragment 

gr Faulty grammar 

imp Too impersonal; needs personal pronouns 

jarg Jargon 

lc Use lower case (not capital) letter 

mod The writer has a misplaced or dangling modifier 

PL Construction is not parallel (symbol // can also be used) 

pass Passive voice; should be active 

point Doesn’t get to the point 

P Punctuation faulty or needed 

ref? Indefinite reference; What does this pronoun refer to?

Rep Repetitious

RO Run-on sentence 

sv Smothered verb 

source Source of this data unclear or needed 

sp Incorrect spelling 

tense Change tense of verb 

TS Problem with topic sentence or one does not exist 

trans Transition needed for coherence 

trite Word or expression overworked, monotonous 

wc Poor word choice; use simpler word 

wordy Should be shortened 

SUMMARY 

Always edit! Editing is crucial to producing professional communication. Without solid editing 

your writing can be disjointed, your reader becomes confused, and your message may be lost. 

Does it take time? Absolutely! Budget time for editing—especially for time-critical 

assignments—and with practice the whole process will seem second nature. 

Editing isn’t the final step, however. Yes, someone else needs to look at your work of art. Get 

ready to put on your thick skin, as this is not for the meek and timid. Read on to the final step to 

better communication ... how to fight for feedback.

– 103 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Ah...this tone is 

much better. 

Ma’am, What do 

you think? 

– 104 –
CHAPTER 9 

FIGHTING FOR 

FEEDBACK 

AND 

GETTING APPROVAL 

This chapter covers: 

• Informal feedback—how to get it, how to give it. 

• Staff coordination—the players. 

• Staff coordination—the process. 

Fighting for feedback and getting approval for your communication are both activities that are 

part of life in the Air Force. When you fight for feedback, you voluntarily seek out someone 

else’s views on your speaking or writing product. Feedback can be very informal and it doesn’t 

have to be from people with impressive job titles. When you get staff approval, you’re going 

through a more formal process that allows individuals to review and comment on your 

communication product. Feedback and coordination are closely linked: if you do a good job at 

fighting for feedback, you’ll find that the coordination process becomes much smoother. 

– 105 –
The Tongue and Quill 

FIGHTING FOR FEEDBACK 

WHY FIGHT FOR FEEDBACK? 

So, why should you fight for feedback? Perhaps the biggest benefit is getting a second set of 

eyes to review your work. Even the best writers and speakers can become so close to their 

projects that they can’t see where they can be made stronger. They may omit vital information, 

fail to see a weakness in their argument or just overlook the need for a transition between two 

main points. Their closeness to the material and pride of authorship can distort or obscure their 

viewpoint. Smart communicators realize this tendency and seek objective feedback from a fresh 

set of eyes. If you seek out and listen to feedback you are much more likely to produce accurate, 

understandable communication that “answers the mail” and resonates with your audience. 

Another reason to fight for feedback is that it often saves time during the coordination process. 

Whether it’s the staff package you’ve been working hard on for 3 weeks or the briefing you have 

to present Friday, getting feedback from someone else’s point of view will help smooth things 

out later as your package makes its way up the chain of command. In some cases having 

someone review and provide feedback can also be a smart political move—if individuals “buy 

in” early in the process, they may be a source of support later if it becomes necessary to defend 

the material.

WHERE CAN I GET FEEDBACK? 

Meaningful feedback can come from many different sources. Coworkers or fellow staffers may 

be a good choice because of their familiarity with the issue and its jargon. They may have also 

had to brief or write for the same people on similar issues; if so, they can give you some tips or 

lessons learned. You may also choose to go to different people for different aspects of your 

work. For example, you may find it helpful to solicit suggestions for improving grammar, 

organization and content from three different “trusted agents” who are strong in those particular 

areas. You may even want to use a trusted agent who’s totally outside your organization to see if 

your message makes sense to someone with no clue about the material. 

WHAT KIND OF FEEDBACK SHOULD I ASK FOR? 

Once you’ve picked out your feedback sources, you should let them know what kind of feedback 

you’re looking for. (We’re not suggesting you say, “Tell me how wonderful this is—I’ve 

worked so hard on it!”) Unless you give them clear guidance, reviewers may focus on details 

like spelling, grammar and margins. Though these are important, make it clear that you want 

feedback on the big picture, too. Here are some examples of items you should ask them to 

address: 

Is my purpose clear and am I properly targeting my audience? For starters, you want to give 

your reviewers a sense of your audience and your purpose. Will the audience positively receive 

the message you intend to convey? Ask them to tell you the bottom line they walked away with 

after reviewing your material. Was it what you intended? 

Did I address the issue at the right level of detail? Too many details can obscure your 

message while too few details can lead to confusion, questions and delays. Ask your reviewers if 

you’ve addressed the issue(s) without going too far into the weeds. You could also have them

ask you questions on the material. Have you anticipated possible questions? If you don’t feel 

comfortable answering their questions, you may need to go back and do more research. Along 

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Fighting for Feedback and Getting Approval 

the same lines, reviewers may help you pinpoint inconsistencies or unclear material that your 

final audience might find as well. 

Are there other viewpoints I need to consider? Finally, your reviewer may offer differing 

viewpoints on the material. If that’s the case, ask for clarification on their viewpoint if 

necessary, but don’t argue with them. Instead, ask yourself if their ideas may come up again 

later. If so, you probably need to address them in your material. 

The bottom line to getting feedback is having an open mind and being able to accept criticism. 

Don’t take comments personally, even though they are attacking your baby. Accept feedback 

willingly and use it constructively—it’s part of the process of developing a quality product. 

HOW TO GIVE FEEDBACK 

There are certain things to keep in mind when giving feedback. First, effective feedback is 

consistent, objective and sensitive to the stated purpose. If someone asks you to review a 

package, make sure you understand what the person wants from your review and stick to it. 

Second, distinguish between necessary, desirable, and unnecessary changes. A page full of red 

marks is hard to interpret. Instead, give the author a sense of what really needs to be changed 

versus the “happy to glad” kinds of suggestions. Next, helpful suggestions pinpoint specific 

problems, such as awkward sentences, grammar, etc. A general statement like “you need to 

work on your sentence structure” isn’t as helpful as underlining specific sentences that need help. 

Finally, you should concentrate on improving the message’s content, not the style or personal 

preferences of the author (unless the author has asked you specifically to comment on writing 

style). 

FEEDBACK PHILOSOPHY 

Feedback should describe rather than judge. Authors are more likely to listen and 

incorporate feedback if it’s phrased constructively. Avoid judgmental language—it places 

people on the defensive. Remember, feedback should be directed at a person’s work or behavior, 

not at the person. 

Feedback is both positive and negative. A balanced description of other people’s work takes 

both strong and weak points into account. Both types of feedback give useful information to 

those people who want to change and improve their work. 

Feedback should be specific rather than general. General statements about other people’s 

work do not indicate the performance elements they may need to change and the elements that 

may serve as models. Highlight or underline specific items you want to bring to the author’s 

attention, and make annotations or comments in the margins. See page 102 for commonly used 

proofreading marks. 

Feedback should consider the needs of both the receiver and the giver of the feedback. 

Feedback often reflects the state of mind of the reviewer, not just the quality of the work. If 

you’re seeking feedback from someone else, try to pick an appropriate time to make the request 

and be realistic about the time required for the review. Similarly, reviewers should make sure 

they are in the right frame of mind before analyzing the material and offering feedback. 

– 107 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Feedback should be directed at behavior the receiver can control. Only frustration results 

when people are reminded of shortcomings they cannot control. A suggestion to improve the 

briefing room’s temperature, for example, is probably beyond the individual’s control. However, 

briefing skills and mannerisms are within the person’s ability to control. 

Feedback should be analyzed to ensure clear communication. Discuss or clarify any 

feedback you’re not sure of to clear up any misinterpretations. The sender’s intended message is 

not always what the receiver hears. 

Feedback should be solicited rather than imposed (except for the supervisor-subordinate 

situation). Feedback is most useful when the receiver asks for it. The receiver is more likely to 

be receptive to your inputs in that case, as opposed to an attitude of “Who asked you?”

A WORD ON SUPERVISOR-SUBORDINATE FEEDBACK 

As a supervisor, you need to be tactful and patient, especially when approving and disapproving 

the communications of subordinates. As a supervisor, you are obligated to help your people 

improve their work. This obligation may mean helping them to revise or rewrite their 

communication, especially if they are inexperienced. Whatever your role, tact and patience 

come more easily to people once they really understand feedback in its broadest context. 

GETTING APPROVAL (a.k.a. COORDINATION) 

A formal coordination process gives interested individuals an opportunity to contribute to and 

comment on a communication product. Though most staff coordination involves written 

products (i.e., “the staff package”), important briefings can also be subjected to a formal review 

process. Formal coordination gives affected individuals a chance to comment, and helps ensure 

the best course of action is presented to the decision maker. Coordination also lets the decision 

maker know who supported or disagreed with the position stated in the paper and who agreed to 

take subsequent actions within their areas of responsibility. 

Getting a staff package fully coordinated takes a lot of time, diligence, and hard work. The 

coordination process has to be closely monitored by the package’s OPR to make sure the 

package gets seen by everyone who needs to see it and doesn’t get forgotten in someone’s inbox. Here are several considerations that may reduce headaches as you work your package up to 

the decision maker.

THE “WHO” OF COORDINATION 

One of the first things you need to decide as you get ready to put your package through the 

approval process is who needs to see the package. 

Check your organization’s policies on coordination. In many organizations, policies exist on 

coordination requirements for routine packages: find out if your product falls in this category. 

Your boss may have a list of people who need to see your package. Also check to see what 

guidance is available electronically—many units have an Action Officer’s Guide posted on their 

website. 

– 108 –
Fighting for Feedback and Getting Approval 

Check with key contacts in the organization. Contacts throughout the organization can be 

very helpful during the staffing process. Fellow staffers, executive officers and secretaries can 

provide advice on who needs to coordinate on your package, including individuals or agencies 

that you hadn’t thought of. Also, they can give you perspectives on what the bosses will and 

won’t accept. As you build and get to know this “underground of expertise,” use it to your 

advantage. 

Realize that the coordination list may grow with time. Don’t be surprised if other offices are 

added as the coordination process occurs. Depending on the material and which level of staff 

you’re dealing with (wing staff versus Air Staff), you may be unaware of all the offices that need 

to see your package. 

Is there a person on your coordination list who carries a lot of clout? When planning your 

coordination strategy, you should probably determine who the “Heavy” is. Who is the one 

person that can make or break your package during coordination? Who is the one person who 

could kill your project with a nonconcur? These people often have strong feelings about how and 

when they are approached. Some of them may hate a “surprise package” and always want to be 

the first to be consulted on an issue. In this case you may want to get early buy-in—which can 

help ensure that others fall into line. Others may want to see what others have to say about the 

issue before it ever reaches their desk. Use your contacts to find out who these influential people 

are, what their preferences are and how they like to be approached. 

THE “HOW” OF COORDINATION 

Aside from deciding who needs to coordinate on your package, you have other things to consider 

prior to releasing your package for coordination. 

Do you want to send out a preview copy? You may want to send a draft package out early to 

potential coordinators, especially for issues that are complex or for offices whose inputs are 

crucial to your package’s success. Doing so allows them time to study the issue and also saves 

time later during formal coordination. Also, you may want to coordinate by telephone for small 

packages, for people who are extremely familiar with issue or with off-base agencies. 

How are you going to route your copy/copies to the various coordinating offices? You need 

to consider how you’re going to send your package around. Will you have only one copy that is 

routed to all affected offices? This may work for high-level packages that don’t have a lot of 

offices to go through, but the more offices you add to the coordination list, the longer this 

process will take. Instead, you may want to “shotgun” out a number of copies of the package so 

a number of offices can coordinate on the package at the same time. This will speed up the 

process, but you will have more copies of the package to keep track of and the various offices 

won’t get to see what each other are saying about the material. You will have to figure out 

which way will work better for your particular case. Also, don’t forget to determine when the 

“Heavy” will coordinate on your package. 

Consider the boss and the schedule. You’re not done yet. There are some more things you 

want to do while preparing to go for coordination. For one, get your boss’s blessing before 

going out-of-office. You want to make sure the boss agrees with what you are saying. You 

probably want to establish a tentative schedule, based on any deadlines you are up against. If 

you have a deadline for completion, build a schedule backwards from that point to allow for 

– 109 –
The Tongue and Quill 

reviews, changes and recoordination. As part of your schedule planning, check to see if any key 

personnel coordinating on your package are going to be TDY or on leave for extended periods. 

If you’re using e-mail to send your package around, consider the following. Specify who is 

coordinating, who is getting an informational copy, and who will be approving the package. 

Consider using “COORD,” “INFO,” “APPROVE,” or other keywords in the Subject line. Use 

clear instructions (i.e., how do you want comments documented and what do you want the 

offices to do with the package when they’re finished with it?) and finally, attach all attachments. 

WAIT! One final check. Before you hit the SEND button or before you go to make all of those 

copies to send out, get someone else to review the package to make sure you haven’t forgotten 

something obvious. Do one last check for spelling and grammar errors—don’t make others 

proofread your work. 

FOLLOWING YOUR PACKAGE 

Know where your package is at all times. Use secretaries, contacts or automated tracking 

systems to track your package(s) and follow up, follow up, follow up. Keep the package moving 

according to your schedule. You want to avoid suspensing higher offices, but at the same time

you want to let them know what the situation is so they can help push your package along. As 

you get the packages back, keep all correspondence and comments and make sure you retrieve 

all coordination copies before going for signature. Make sure you’ve incorporated any 

appropriate suggestions into the final product. You may want to summarize the comments and 

inputs for the approving authority. 

NONCONCURRENCES 

How do you handle a nonconcur? Generally, you only want to send up packages that have 

received concurrence from all offices. So, do you change the package or do you just include the 

nonconcurrence in the final package? That may depend on where the nonconcur is coming from. 

You probably would concede the point to someone with a lot of clout; otherwise your package is 

as good as dead. Short of that, what can you do? You may be able to persuade the other party to 

see your point of view. If that doesn’t work, do you give in by making small concessions or 

make a stand? Before you decide to make a stand, you probably want to think about a couple of 

things. For one, is the issue THAT important, or can you make a concession? Remember also 

that with the give and take of staff work, a compromise now may help you later. Choose your 

battles carefully; however, there comes a time to stand firm when you know you’re right. 

Finally, do you have the full support of your boss? Any unresolved disputes at your level may 

need to be highlighted for resolution at a higher level. 

STARTING OVER 

Too many substantial changes may require you to start the coordination process all over. You’ll 

have to decide if you’ve crossed this threshold once you see what kind of inputs you’re getting 

on the package. If you decide to start over, recirculate both the original and changed packages to 

illustrate the changes you’ve made and why you’ve made them. 

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Fighting for Feedback and Getting Approval 

FINISHING UP 

Don’t give up. You’ll eventually work your way up the chain until you reach the final audience. 

Remember what we said at the beginning: getting that staff package fully coordinated takes a lot 

of time, diligence and hard work. Don’t get frustrated. Along the way, you will receive lots of 

suggested improvements to your package, but remember why you are coordinating this material 

in the first place—to present the boss with the best course of action and to tell him or her who 

agreed with it and had inputs to it. So don’t be surprised by inputs that keep your message 

consistent with previous decisions by the boss and the other supervisors in your chain of 

command. 

COORDINATING ON OTHERS’ PACKAGES 

When asked to coordinate on someone else’s package, don’t put it off. Review it, make your 

inputs to it and keep it moving. It helps keep your desk clear and the other person may 

remember your efficiency when he or she gets your package. This will also keep you from

busting the suspense. If you need more time to review the material, ask for an extension. But 

don’t wait until the suspense to ask for an extension—be proactive. Finally, ask if there are any 

nonconcurrences on the package so you can take that into consideration. 

SUMMARY 

As a staffer, you have to remember the big picture. Your job is to get the corporate stamp on the 

package. You do this by first getting feedback from a few key individuals to make sure your 

message is loud and clear. Then, you get other offices to approve what you are proposing 

through the coordination process. Only after the package is fully coordinated can you provide 

the boss with the best course of action and tell him who is supporting that action. 

Proper coordination is the oil that lubricates complex organizations and enables efficient 

operations. How you view the process and your critical role is crucial. Is coordination just a 

bureaucratic hassle that you have to endure, or will you meet the challenge head-on by doing a 

professional, proper job? Your attitude is key to success. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

COORDINATOR’S CHECKLIST

Before routing to others, prepare the package and all of its attachments. As 

necessary... 

; Prepare a “camera-ready” copy of the material. 

; Regarding the material you are presenting, ask yourself: 

; Are all facts—pro and con—given, and are they accurate?

; Are some of your “facts” actually assumptions or opinions?

; Is the material concise and clearly presented?

; Does the final recommendation represent a sound—the best—position?

; Can I justify my proposal if asked?

; Are all administrative procedures completed and accurate?

; Get feedback on your package from a trusted agent. 

; Would you sign the paper yourself if you were the approving official?

; Modify your paper according to the above guidance and questions.

After taking the necessary actions above, you should: 

; Decide who will coordinate (and in what order), ensuring each office has a continuing 

interest in the substance of the paper. Seek your chief’s guidance, if necessary.

; Decide how you will route the package through the above offices. 

; Map out a schedule for coordination, based on your routing plan. 

; Coordinate the paper within your own directorate first, and get the chief’s signature on the 

paper so that coordinators will know they’re coordinating your office’s position, not 

yours. 

; Hand carry coordination whenever time permits or when the subject is complex. 

; Coordinate by telephone and e-mail when feasible and practical. 

; Attach any nonconcurrence to the package if it cannot be resolved with the appropriate 

official and send a summary of the disputed issues to your chief to resolve. Show future

coordinators the nonconcurrence. 

; Provide copies only if required or upon request. Save paper! 

; Keep all correspondence and comments. 

; Retrieve all coordination copies and incorporate/address suggestions before going for 

final signature/approval.

– 112 –
PART IV: 

FACE-TO-FACE: 

SPEAKING AND 

LISTENING

– 113 –
I don’t know what 

all the fuss is

about. I love Air 

Force Speaking ... 

the only thing I 

have trouble with 

is stopping. 

– 114 –
CHAPTER 10 

AIR FORCE 

SPEAKING 

This chapter covers: 

• The basics of verbal communication: It’s all in the delivery! 

• Conquering those crazy quirks. 

• Delivery formats. 

• Using visual aids to your advantage. 

Sooner or later, you will have to speak in public. It comes with being in the military, 

there’s little you can do to avoid it, and the requirements will increase as you climb the 

ranks. If the thought makes you nervous, you’re not alone! Research shows that most 

people place fear of public speaking second only to fear of dying. If you are 

inexperienced, the fundamentals and tips for polished speaking in this chapter will help 

you solve these problems. If you are an accomplished speaker, use this as a review ... or 

skip it. 

One goal should be to improve your self-concept as a speaker. Think positively, and 

focus on improvement, not perfection. Like writing and listening, speaking is a skill; 

once you grasp the basics, the rest is practice, polish and style. You may be embarrassed 

by your initial mistakes, but you’ll survive. Few of us will become guest speakers, but all 

of us can become more effective if we practice the basics. Learn all you can from your 

contemporaries; some of them are accomplished speakers. If you are already a speaker 

extraordinaire, share your views, tips and personal hang-ups about speaking with others. 

Everyone improves when they receive timely and objective feedback. 

“Practice doesn’t make perfect; perfect practice makes perfect.” 

— Joan Ballard and Steve Sifers 

– 115 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Before you consider the fundamentals unique 

to speaking, you may want to review the 

Chapter 2 summary of the Seven Steps to 

Effective Communication. 

SEVEN STEPS FOR EFFECTIVE 

COMMUNICATION 

1. Analyze Purpose and Audience 

2. Research Your Topic 

3. Support Your Ideas 

4. Organize and Outline 

5. Draft

6. Edit 

7. Fight for Feedback and Get Approval

Remember, the fundamentals above are just 

as necessary for good speaking as they are for 

good writing. Although there are subtle 

differences in the drafting and editing 

sections, the general concepts apply. Indeed, 

these basic principles are a good place to start 

when preparing an oral presentation, but we 

all know there’s more to it than that. Let’s 

talk about delivery techniques. 

IT’S ALL IN THE DELIVERY: 

PART ONE—VERBAL COMMUNICATION 

How effectively do you use your voice to drive home your ideas or information? You 

have control over rate, volume, pitch, pause and other aspects of your speech. So, use 

your voice to create interest in your presentation. Read on to find out what we mean. 

RATE 

There is no correct rate of speed for every speech. However, you might consider this: 

People can listen 4 to 5 times faster than the normal spoken rate of 120 words a minute. 

So, if you speak too slowly, you will lose the interest of an audience who is processing 

information much faster than you are delivering it! On the other hand, you don’t want to 

use the same rate of speech all the time. Use the rate of speech that you need to add 

emphasis to what you want during your presentation. Consider speaking at a faster rate 

to indicate excitement or sudden action or a slower rate to hint at calm or a more serious 

tone. 

VOLUME 

Volume is another verbal technique that can give emphasis to your speech. If possible,

check out the room to know how loudly you must talk, remembering you will need to talk 

louder with a crowd since the sound is absorbed. Ask someone in the back of the room if 

you can be heard. Remember your voice will carry further when the room is empty 

versus full. If the audience must strain to hear you, they will eventually tune you out 

from utter exhaustion. A portable microphone may be a good idea if you know you tend 

to speak quietly, and one is often required in large auditoriums. Speak louder or softer to 

emphasize a point—a softer level or lower volume is often the more effective way to 

achieve emphasis. 

PITCH 

To use pitch effectively, you need to practice the talents of a singer. Pitch is really the 

use of notes (higher or lower) in voice range. Start by speaking in a voice range that is 

comfortable for you and then move up or down your scale for emphasis, using pitch 

changes in vowels, words or entire sentences. You can use a downward (high to low) 

– 116 –
Air Force Speaking 

inflection in a sentence for an air of certainty and an upward (low to high) inflection for 

an air of uncertainty. Variety in speech pitch helps to avoid monotone and capture the 

listener’s attention. 

PAUSE 

The pause gives you time to catch your breath and the audience time to collect your 

ideas. Never hurry a speech; pause occasionally so your audience can digest your 

comments. The important question is this: Where? Pauses serve the same function as

punctuation in writing. Short pauses usually divide points within a sentence, and longer 

pauses note the ends of sentences. You can also use longer pauses for breaks from one 

main point to another, from the body to the conclusion of your speech, or to set off an 

important point worthy of short reflection. A pause may seem long to you, but it’s 

usually much shorter than you think ... and your audience will appreciate it. However, 

don’t get pause-happy and make your speech sound choppy. 

ARTICULATION AND PRONUNCIATION 

Your articulation and pronunciation reflect your mastery of the spoken English language. 

Articulation is the art of expressing words distinctly. Pronunciation is the ability to say 

words correctly. Of course, you may be able to articulate your thoughts and still 

mispronounce words while doing so. Unfortunately (and unfairly), many people consider 

word pronunciation or mispronunciation a direct reflection on your intelligence. Listen 

to yourself and make your words distinct, understandable and appropriate to your 

audience. If you are not sure of your pronunciation, consult a current dictionary—before 

you get up and do your thing. You can even look up dictionaries on-line with audio links 

that will pronounce the word for you! 

LENGTH 

“Be clear, be quick, and be gone.” 

 — from Presenter’s University 

Have you ever taken a PME course in-residence and wondered why the instructors were 

so big on the timing of your briefings? It is because the length of your presentation is 

crucial. In our military environment, you must be able to relay your thoughts and ideas 

succinctly. A key rule in verbal communication is to keep it short and sweet. There are 

few people who will tolerate a briefer or speaker who wastes the audience’s time. Have 

your stuff together before you speak. Know what you want to say and then say it with 

your purpose and the audience in mind. 

OK, we’ve just hit the highlights of controlling and managing your voice to optimize the 

delivery of your briefing. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to actually 

practice these tips so that you will soon have the “radio voice” that public speakers dream

about. But wait, you’re not done yet! There’s more to the fine art of public speaking 

than your managing your voice. You need to manage your gestures, movement, and that 

pesky thing called nervousness. 

– 117 –
The Tongue and Quill 

IT’S ALL IN THE DELIVERY: 

PART TWO—NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION 

“You never get a second chance to make a first impression.” 

 — Anonymous 

Numerous studies have shown that people remember less than 10 percent of what is 

verbally presented, but first impressions are largely based on nonverbal communication 

such as how you dress, carry yourself, and use gestures and other body language. Your 

biggest nonverbal challenge to conquer will be your nervousness, so you must be 

prepared to overcome (or at least diminish) stage fright. Stage fright is often nothing 

more than misdirected energy, meaning the excitement and/or possible anxiety you feel is 

displayed in some form or fashion for all to see. You probably have witnessed a great 

presentation “gone bad” solely due to nerves that have gone unchecked. Here’s a 

checklist on how to overcome stage fright and put your best foot forward ... or at least 

fool your audience. Remember, it may be impossible to be entirely free from

nervousness—that’s OK! But you don’t want the nervousness to disable you from

sending your message. 

It 

never 

gets old!

– 118 –
Air Force Speaking 

OVERCOMING “SWEATY PALMS SYNDROME” 

; Analyze your audience: listening traits, needs, desires, behaviors, and educational 

background. This will reduce your fear of the unknown and the resulting 

nervousness.

; Check out the place where you’re speaking. Is it large enough to accommodate the 

number of people? Does it have a blackboard, microphone, arrangement for visual 

aids, tables, chairs, ventilation, lighting, pencils, paper, telephones, extra projector 

bulbs, etc? Does the equipment operate properly?

; Practice, practice, practice. Using a tape recorder, a video camera, a full-length 

mirror or even your peers can be really helpful. Try doing a “dry run” at the office 

or where you’ll be.

; Memorize your introduction and transition into the main point. It’ll help you 

through the first and most difficult minute.

; Smile and be positive! Your audience wants you to succeed! Keep your 

nervousness to yourself ... chances are your audience won’t even notice if you don’t 

mention it.

; Take a short walk right before you “go on stage” to help release some energy.

; Deliver your message. Focus your attention where it belongs ... not on yourself. 

; Make eye contact and look for feedback. Play your audience. Let them know you 

are looking at and talking to them. It holds their attention. If you look only at your 

notes, you may lose your listeners—and you can’t wake them up if you don’t know 

they’re asleep! 

; Use simple, everyday language appropriate for your audience. Use contractions 

and keep sentences short. Use personal pronouns, if appropriate. Repeat key words 

and follow with specific examples if you get into abstract or complicated reasoning

; Involve members of your audience by soliciting their answers and information.

; Enhance your presentation through creative use of newspaper clippings, cartoons, 

music, appropriate quotes and relevant, self-deprecating experiences to get a point 

across.

; Use your excess energy naturally: facial expressions, pertinent gestures, walking, 

or pressing fingertips or thumbs against lectern or chair. Use your facial 

expressions, hands and arms to reinforce your speech and your points of 

emphasis—just don’t overdo them. Leaning on the lectern, rocking back and forth 

or side to side or slouching on one leg and then the other is never a positive way to 

use your excess energy. Read on for more tips on those dreaded nervous habits.

; Looking good builds confidence and builds your credibility with the audience. Do 

you need a haircut? Is your uniform pressed? Are your ribbons, nametag and 

insignia attached correctly? Your buttons buttoned? Your shoes shined? Are you 

standing erect and feeling alert, but relaxed? Remember, in your audience’s mind, 

a frumpy uniform and sloppy bearing equals an equally frumpy presenter. Fair or 

not, that’s the way your audience’s mind works. We’re all critics! 

– 119 –
The Tongue and Quill 

COMMON NONVERBAL QUIRKS 

Here are some final thoughts on nervousness. Most of us have quirks when we are put in 

the limelight. The key is to be cognizant of yours and don’t overdo them. Keep yourself 

in check, and as always, seek feedback. In time you will have it down to an art. We’ve 

named a few of the more common quirks below. Do any hit home for you?

• The life raft. This is the speaker who clings for dear life to podium or lectern. Their 

ultimate fear is leaving the comfort and security of that piece of wood in front of 

them, so they hold onto it with both hands in desperation. Walking about the room is 

incomprehensible to these speakers.

• The fig leaf. This is the speaker who is recovering from the above habit, is now 

venturing out in front of the audience, but is still not quite sure what to do with those 

pesky things called hands. He or she wants to run back to the safety of their life raft,

but instead may lay one hand over another at the end of stiff arms, with hands resting 

... where a fig leaf would be. Do you get the picture?

• The hand washer. This is a speaker who stores all nervousness in their hands. 

While they speak, they wash and they wash. You may think with all that friction they 

would suffer thermal injury to their palms, but they’re indestructible. Too bad you 

missed their message while you focused on the quirk. 

• The caged tiger. Listening to these speakers is like watching a tennis match. These 

speakers continually pace from one side of the room or stage to the other, never even 

stopping to check their pulse. They expend so much energy that their briefing 

qualifies as aerobic exercise. Their calorie expenditure goes up even higher when 

they combine this technique with hand washing.

• The rocker. Rockers are caged tigers on the road to recovery. They have conquered 

the worst phases of stage fright and no longer fear visible perspiration or dry mouth, 

but they have some residual fear of standing still and simply talking. Speaking 

experience has tamed this beast, but not to the point of total comfort with the art of

public speaking. There are two style variations: 1) the fore-and-aft rocker and 2) the 

side-to-side rocker.

• Pocket maniacs. OK, it’s against regulation, but these folks should consider sewing 

their pants pockets shut because whenever they speak they start counting the change 

from their last trip to the soda machine. Many of these speakers are trying 

desperately not to be hand washers or fig leafers and end up jamming their hands in 

their pockets. They are often oblivious to the new distraction and annoyance they 

inflict on their audience. These speakers may find that holding something—

anything—will help them refrain from this habit and prevent them from “hand 

washing.” 

• Pen clickers. These speakers are related to the pocket maniacs. They have to be 

doing something with their hands. All pens, pencils and other similar objects should 

be removed from their possession before they get up to give a presentation because 

the temptation is just too great. They are compelled to manipulate and click any pen 

in their possession, which does not make for high marks on audience critiques. 

– 120 –
Air Force Speaking 

By themselves, these quirks won’t make you fail as a speaker, but they can create 

problems if they are severe—the audience begins to focus on the quirk instead of your 

message. Again, most of us have done some of these things at one time or another. Try 

to be aware of your own mannerisms, keep them in check and make sure they are not 

becoming habit and detracting from your message. 

With my new laser pointer, I can 

highlight main points AND blind 

anyone who dares to ask me a 

question.

If I’m going to bomb up here, I m

as well be comfortable. 

ight

Joe Cool

Gadget Man 

Mr. 

Vulnerable

 Life Raft Guy 

Memorable Speakers 

Please don’t hurt 

me... I’ll never get up 

here again.

I hope this podium doubles as a flotation 

device... 

– 121 –
The Tongue and Quill 

DELIVERY FORMATS: 

IMPROMPTU, PREPARED AND MANUSCRIPT 

Your approach to delivery of the spoken message may be affected by several factors, 

including the time you have to prepare and the nature of the message. Three common 

delivery formats are listed below. 

Impromptu speaking is when we respond during a meeting or “take the floor” at a 

conference. It’s what we do when we speak publicly without warning or on a few 

moments’ notice. To do it well requires a great amount of self-confidence, mastery of the 

subject and the ability to “think on your feet.” A superb impromptu speaker has achieved 

the highest level in verbal communications. 

Prepared (formerly extemporaneous speaking or 

briefing) refers to those times when we have ample 

opportunity to prepare. Most military briefings are 

done in this format. This doesn’t mean we write a 

script and memorize it, but it does require a 

thorough outline with careful planning and 

practicing. The specific words and phrases used at 

the time of delivery, however, are basically 

spontaneous and sound very natural. 

Both students and instructors have 

had trouble differentiating impromptu 

and extemporaneous speaking in the

PME classroom. Why? Because 

dictionaries vary in how they define 

these terms. Some, including The 

Cambridge Dictionary of American 

English, define extemporaneous as

“done or said without preparation”

(synonymous with impromptu). The 

Merriam-Webster dictionary, on the 

other hand, states that

extemporaneous speech “is prepared 

in advance but delivered without

notes.” To confuse matters further,

extemporaneous briefers in the Air 

Force frequently use notes or an 

outline (but not a script) when

speaking. So, for ease of discussion 

in this edition of Tongue and Quill, 

the term prepared speaking will 

replace extemporaneous speaking. 

‘Nuff said. 

A manuscript briefing is used in situations that 

require every word to be absolutely perfect. To do 

this, you prepare a manuscript, a word-for-word 

script of what you are going to say. Such a script 

ensures you get it right every time. Manuscripts are 

often used at higher management levels for 

complex or controversial issues (policy briefings, 

press conferences, source selection briefings to 

unsuccessful officers, etc.). They’re also used for 

routine briefings that must be repeated several 

times a year (base orientation, etc.), or at formal 

ceremonies (retirements, medal presentations, etc.) 

that must adhere to established customs and 

courtesies. Manuscript-style briefings provide 

several advantages: 

• Ensures key information won’t be omitted. 

• Avoids repercussions caused by a briefer’s inadvertent ad-libbing. 

• Imparts exact definitions and precise phrasing, if these are important.

• Allows anyone to present a “canned briefing” without extensive preparation and 

rehearsal time—including less knowledgeable personnel.

– 122 –
Air Force Speaking 

CAUTION! Manuscripts make a briefing a piece of cake, right? Wrong. Unless you 

are a talented speaker, reading words aloud sounds dull. People frequently tend to lack 

spontaneity, lack eye contact and stand behind the lectern with their script. You may also 

lose credibility. The audience may think you’re hiding behind the script and reading 

something you really don’t know anything about. Finally, know your audience! They 

may feel insulted if you read something they could have just as well read themselves. If 

you can deliver a manuscript briefing without error and still maintain a natural and direct 

contact with your audience, you have a masterful command of “speak-reading.” 

Here are some key points in preparing and presenting a manuscript briefing. 

• Prepare the briefing: 

- Use a large, easy-to-read font (at least size 12) in all capital letters 

- Write as if you were speaking 

- Fill only the top two-thirds of page so that your eyes won’t drop and you won’t lose 

eye contact with your audience 

- Double or triple space; never break a word at the end of a line or a sentence at the 

end of a page 

- Number pages with bold figures 

- Underscore or highlight words you wish to emphasize ... insert double slashes (//) 

where you plan a major pause 

- Use a loose-leaf binder (e.g. in case of windy days or nervous fingers) or stack 

pages loosely to turn pages 

- Mark script with red dots to show visual aid changes 

• Practice, practice, practice: 

- Read and reread until you’ve practically memorized it 

- Add the ingredients of volume, inflection and eye contact 

- Avoid combinations of words that are difficult to say 

 - Look at your audience when uttering emphatic words and during the closing words 

of a sentence 

- Practice using gestures—strive for enthusiasm

- Dry run your visual aids 

• Close with confidence: 

- Never explain why you choose to read (it won’t be apparent if you’ve prepared!) 

- Be flexible; if necessary (and appropriate), know where you can shorten the speech 

- Avoid being lengthy after saying “In conclusion.” 

- Don’t add new information at the end 

– 123 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Individuals who can strongly present briefings in all three types of delivery formats are 

the envy of everyone. They appear knowledgeable and comfortable in their roles as 

speakers because they have done their homework. They may be experts on their subject 

and know how to present their views with clarity on a moment’s notice (impromptu 

speaking). They have researched and rehearsed their presentations (prepared and 

manuscript briefings). They think carefully before they speak, outline their main ideas, 

say what has to be said, conclude and shut up. Remember, there is no substitution for 

preparation. If you have the time to prepare—do it! 

 I can’t believe you said

“HOOAH” 5 times in 

your 15-min briefing to

the Joint Staff! 

Kathy, you

have a lot to

learn ... 

– 124 –
Air Force Speaking 

FYI ... BRIEFINGS IN THE JOINT ENVIRONMENT 

In the Air Force, the term briefing is loosely applied to almost any oral presentation 

given in the context of military activities. The following list was adapted from Army 

FM 101-5, and serves as a reference for those who may find themselves in a joint 

assignment. This terminology is not commonly used in the Air Force; the intent is to 

familiarize you with what else is “out there.” If you are in a joint assignment, you may 

hear briefings defined and named according to their purpose. Here are four types of 

briefings and their characteristics. 

Informative briefing: Purpose is to keep listener abreast of the current situation and 

supply specific information.

• Designed to inform the listener and gain his understanding 

• Deals with 

 High priority facts and information requiring immediate action 

 Complex information on complicated plans, systems, statistics, or visuals 

 Controversial information requiring explanation 

• May have conclusions or recommendations 

Decision briefing: Purpose is to produce an answer to a question or obtain a decision 

on a specific problem. 

• Briefer must be prepared to present 

 Assumptions

 Facts 

 Alternative solutions 

 Reasons/rationale for recommended solutions(s) 

 Coordination involved 

 Visual information 

• Briefer states he/she is looking for a decision; asks for decision if one is not 

forthcoming at conclusion. 

• Advises appropriate staff elements of commander’s decision after the briefing. 

Staff briefing: Main purpose is to secure a coordinated effort and

 Rapidly disseminate information orally

 Aid group decision-making

 Secure a united effort

• Most widely used and most flexible briefing—used at all levels of command

• Visuals will make complex issues clearer

• Keeps commanders/staffs abreast of situation

• May involve an exchange of information, issuance of directives, or presentation of 

guidance

Mission briefing: Purpose is to impart information that is used to elaborate on an 

order, give specific instructions, or instill an appreciation for the mission. 

• Briefer must exercise care to avoid confusion or conflict with orders 

• Use maps and graphic representations of the situation 

• Mission briefing format varies from command to command 

– 125 –
The Tongue and Quill 

A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS... 

“Enough with the bells and whistles–just get to the point.” 

 — General Hugh Shelton

As always, check with

your organization for

local policies on

formats. These are only 

general guidelines. 

We’ve spent the majority of the chapter on how to speak and 

how to get over your nervousness. But there’s more you can 

do to make an oral presentation more professional and useful 

for your audience. Visual aids can enhance your oral 

presentation by helping the audience remember and 

understand the content of your message. Remember, 

comprehension rises dramatically when we see something rather than when we just hear 

about it. The average person retains 5 percent of what is heard and 65 percent of what is 

seen. More dramatically, the human brain processes visuals 400,000 times faster than 

text! In other words, “show and tell” is better than just “tell” alone. 

Slides are the most common visual aid used for briefings in today’s Air Force. They help 

the briefer to remember key points and help to keep the presentation brief. The presenter 

makes the slide simple and fills in the “white space” with concise spoken words. 

Before we launch into Slides 101, let’s take a second to stress one point—you are also a 

visual aid. If you are well groomed, professional and well prepared, you’ll be the most 

effective visual aid in your presentation. It doesn’t matter how awesome your slides are. 

If you look like a slob and appear insecure and awkward, the audience most likely won’t 

take you or your message seriously. Take the time to put on a freshly pressed uniform

and look sharp! 

PREPARING YOUR SLIDES 

The capabilities of computers today make it easy to produce a 

blizzard of flashy visual aids. Instead of drawing up a dozen slides 

on a legal pad and running them over to the printing department, we 

can create hundreds of slides in a few hours without ever leaving 

our desks. 

Attention 

PowerPoint 

Rangers! 

Each organization is different when it comes down to how your slides should look. 

However, most organizations in today’s Air Force agree that the information we present 

shouldn’t be too complex. Don’t pack your slides with every detail and custom

animation feature you can dig up. You don’t need Venetian blind effects and fancy 

backdrops; all you need is the information! 

COLOR. Color is a very important communication tool. Good designers limit their 

color palettes even if 256 different colors may be available. 

• Use colors in a standard manner throughout your presentation. 

• Limit your choices to 4 or 5 colors. 

• Use light colors on a dark background and vice versa. 

• Use colors to emphasize key elements, but try to avoid red lettering. 

– 126 –
Air Force Speaking 

• Use the same background color on all images. 

• Avoid red/green and blue/red color combinations. 

• Use bright colors (yellow, orange, etc.) sparingly. 

• Maintain good contrast between important information and background. 

TEXT. The first rule here is “less is more.” Less experienced briefers are often tempted 

to pack presentations with every detail they can think of for fear they might leave 

something out during the real thing. Slides should have minimal content and lots of 

“white space.” Slides aim at the visual portion of the brain and will only confuse the 

audience if they are jam-packed with data. The slides should not be self-explanatory. If 

they are, you probably have too much stuff on them. Remember, you should add value to 

the presentation and should supplement the slides with your eloquent speaking abilities. 

• Keep it simple. Use the “7 x 7 rule:”

− No more than 7 words per line

− No more than 7 lines per slide

• Spelling is important! 

• Don’t read slides—it’s insulting.

• If you have more than one slide per main point, add “Continued” on subsequent slides 

to keep flow. 

• Have only one thought per slide—it gives the audience time to refocus on you. 

• Avoid hyphenation at end of lines. 

• Use upper and lower case for three reasons: 

− Helps identify acronyms, which we love in the military! 

− More comfortable for audience, because this is how we read. 

− Makes your presentation look more professional.

• Emphasize key words with boldface, italicized, underlined or colored text.

• Left-justify your text.

• Font size: Use the same type font throughout the presentation. 

− Title: 40 point 

− Subtitle: 30 point 

− Text: 22-26 point

• Most importantly, you fill in the information. So, you should always know and be 

ready to present one level of detail below a piece of information. If you don’t, you 

will end up reading slides or the audience will have many questions left unanswered. 

– 127 –
The Tongue and Quill 

GRAPHICS. Whether designed for a briefing or written report, no graphic should be so 

elaborate it becomes an end in itself and obscures your intended message. However, 

when used wisely graphics can certainly add to your presentation. Although text is 

important, audiences remember more when content is graphically presented. A 60-

minute briefing can be pretty boring if it is all done in text. But, on the flip side, cool 

graphics do not guarantee an effective briefing. Read below for some tips to keep you in 

check when using graphics. 

• Use only artwork suitable for your presentation. Know your audience! 

• Use graphs (bar charts, pie charts, etc.) to convey statistics. 

• Be careful with graphs: too many can be confusing. 

• Line graphs show trends over time. 

• Bar graphs compare values. 

• Pie charts compare values against a whole. 

• Tables: Don’t use if you can convey information verbally or in a graph—they usually 

appear overly “busy” on a slide. 

− Limit to 4 rows and 7 columns. 

− Use footnotes to remove distracting data from tables. 

− Round off numbers if possible. 

− Don’t put decimal points in numbers like 10 or 100. The audience may interpret 

“100.00” as “10,000.” 

• Place your graphics off-center—use them to lead your audience to important text

information. 

• Be careful with animation: 

− Sound: Use sparingly and make sure they add impact. 

− Slide transitions: Most briefers overuse slide transitions. If you decide to use 

transitions, use the same type throughout your entire briefing, and make sure they 

add, not detract from your presentation. 

• Video can be quite effective, but again, use sparingly. 

Make it Big, keep it Simple, make it Clear, and be Consistent! 

OK! We’ve just highlighted how to develop effective slides for your briefing or 

presentation with proper use of color, text and graphics. Remember, local policy will 

always supersede the guidance we have provided. Let’s close this part of the chapter 

with some general tips on slide presentations. 

– 128 –
Air Force Speaking 

DO’s DON’Ts

Stand beside your visual aid. Better yet, get away from

slides and walk around. 

This may depend on your purpose and audience, and 

location of your briefing. 

Stand between the audience and visual aid 

and block the audience’s view. 

Start out with well-thought out opening statement and try 

to elicit audience involvement by asking a relevant

question or two. Use a personal story or experience (if

appropriate) to bridge to your topic. 

Jump right into slides. 

If referring to screen, stand aside, use a pointer, and put

it down when done. 

Talk at the screen with back to your 

audience. 

Give the audience time to read slides. Change slides too quickly. 

Read the slide silently or watch to see if audience has 

finished reading. If slide contains a long quote, 

paraphrase or underline important parts. 

Read the slide to the audience. 

Speak naturally and use gestures. Give a memorized briefing. 

Make the slide simple and fill it out with concise spoken

words. 

Show a complicated slide and give a 

complicated explanation of it. 

Show only necessary slides. Use slides as gimmicks or crutches. 

Turn off projector or use a cover slide. Leave projector on with blank screen. 

Check for spelling and punctuation...more than once! Forget to check spelling and punctuation. 

Practice handling slides and gauging time needed to read

them. Use an assistant to advance slides if available. 

Disrupt presentation to handle slides. 

Anticipate likely questions and rehearse possible 

answers. Keep answers short and simple. Listen

carefully to questioner and clarify question if needed. 

Be caught off-guard by questions from the 

audience. Don’t give quick replies. Don’t

direct questions to specific members of 

audience. 

Know your purpose, audience, and any time constraints. If time is limited (5-15 minutes), you may

want to consider NOT using slides. In

these cases, it’s more important to establish 

connection with your audience than it is to

show a few slides. 

Practice, practice, practice! And test visual aids prior to

your briefing. 

Wing it, and never apologize because you 

didn’t prepare. This makes you look

irresponsible and ruins your credibility 

before you even start!

– 129 –
The Tongue and Quill 

SUMMARY 

Use vocal characteristics such as rate, volume, pitch and pause to enhance the impact of 

their message. 

Be aware of any nonverbal quirks; reduce nervousness through solid preparation. 

Select an appropriate delivery format: impromptu, prepared, or manuscript. 

Visual aids can enhance oral presentations, but don’t lose sight of the big picture. 

Remember the basics of delivery, keep focused, and do your homework. 

The more often you speak in front of or with a group, the more self-confident you 

become. High confidence and thorough knowledge of your subject are important 

prerequisites for speaking. Remember, if you have the time to prepare—do it! 

– 130 –
CHAPTER 11 

EFFECTIVE 

LISTENING 

STRATEGIES

This chapter covers: 

• Why listening is important to Air Force personnel. 

• Three active listening strategies: Informative, Critical and Empathic approaches.

• Cultivating the motivation to listen well. 

Listening is a valuable communication skill, but one that gets little respect and attention. Some

of us spend hours preparing and practicing our briefings; how much time and effort do we spend 

on preparing and practicing to listen? Because listening is so undervalued, we’ll first make the 

case for why it’s so important, and then describe ways to improve your listening skills. 

 

 

“Conversation in the United States is a competitive exercise in which the first

person to draw a breath is declared the listener.” 

 — Nathan Miller 

– 131 –
The Tongue and Quill 

UNDERSTANDING HEARING AND LISTENING 

To better understand the listening process, let’s begin by distinguishing between hearing and 

listening. Hearing occurs when your ears pick up sound waves being transmitted by a speaker or

some other source. Hearing requires a source of sound and an ear capable of perceiving it. It 

does not require the conscious decoding of information. Each day, you hear numerous sounds—

background music in an elevator, the hum of the computer, cars passing by outside—sounds you 

may not even be aware of unless someone draws your attention to them. 

Listening, on the other hand, involves making sense out of what is being transmitted. Listening 

involves not only hearing; it involves attending to and considering what is heard. As you listen, 

you receive sounds, and you consciously and actively decode them. Effective listening is an 

active process, and active listening involves exerting energy and responding appropriately in 

order to hear, comprehend, evaluate, and remember the message. 

WHY IS LISTENING SO IMPORTANT? 

Though listening is usually ignored in formal education, it is the most common form of 

communication. According to Dr. John Kline, an authority on Air Force communication and the 

author of Listening Effectively, studies have shown that we spend 70 percent of our waking hours 

in some form of communication. Of the time we spend communicating, 10 percent is spent 

writing, 15 percent is spent reading, 30 percent is spent speaking and 45 percent is spent 

listening. 

When speakers and listeners fail to communicate, the outcomes can be disastrous. Planes can 

crash, unit morale can deteriorate, “routine” surgeries can have horrendous outcomes and 

families can self-destruct. Though we often focus on the speaker’s role in communication, good 

listening skills can often make the difference between success and failure. 

Both Air Force and civilian managers put a premium on good listening. In a recent study, 282 

members of the Academy of Certified Administrative Managers identified listening as the most 

crucial management skill. In another study published in Communication Quarterly, business 

people were polled on the most important communication skills they used at work and the one 

they wished they had studied in college: Listening was the #1 answer to both questions. 

Listening is especially important in the Air Force, and actually in any military unit. Success is 

literally a matter of life and death, and we routinely maintain and operate equipment worth 

millions of dollars. Receiving, comprehending, and remembering spoken information is critical, 

and any miscommunication is potentially catastrophic. Effective listening helps to build the trust 

and mutual respect needed to do our job. Military personnel must understand their team

members and the situation, and leaders with good listening skills often make better decisions and 

have a stronger bond with their troops. 

To summarize, listening allows us to learn the facts, evaluate situations, understand our team

members, and build trust with others. These are all really important, so why do so few people 

listen well? Why is it so hard? And how do we get better at it?

– 132 –
Effective Listening Strategies 

MOTIVATIONAL BARRIERS TO LISTENING 

Listening takes a lot of effort. Our willingness to exert that effort is linked to our motivation to 

listen. Techniques to improve listening skills are worthless without cultivating the motivation to 

use them. 

To help yourself evaluate your own listening motivation, scan the questions below. 

? Do I pretend to listen?

? Do I seek distractions?

? Do I criticize the speakers? 

? Do I stereotype topics as uninteresting? 

? Do I prejudge the meaning and intent of speaker’s messages? 

? Do I avoid difficult and complex topics? 

? Do I get emotionally charged up about minor points a speaker has made?

? In a conversation, do I tune out the speaker because I’m preparing my response?

? Do I interrupt others? Has anyone told me I sometimes interrupt others?

? Do I spend a disproportionate amount of time talking in meetings or social events?

? Does everything a speaker describes remind me of something that happened to me?

Though we’ve all been guilty of these once in a while, if you answered “yes” to three or more 

questions, then you might benefit from some of the suggestions to improve your self-motivation 

later in the chapter. 

Sometimes we have blind spots and overestimate our success as listeners. In his book, Listening 

Effectively, Dr. Kline describes how most individuals in groups will rate their own listening skills 

as a 7.5 out of 10, while rating the rest of the group as a 4.1 out of 10. These data indicate that 

most people see listening as a problem in others, but not in themselves. 

Here’s another set of “workplace climate” questions to consider. If you have “yes” answers to 

several of these questions, you might want to take a closer look at how you listen and interact 

with others. 

? Do employees go around you to talk to others about work issues?

? Do you often learn about important events after the fact?

? Do you frequently find yourself putting out organizational fires? 

? Are you rarely tasked with complicated responsibilities?

? Do you receive lots of information in writing ... including some items that would normally be 

handled face to face? 

Sometimes it takes a deliberate effort to cultivate our motivation to listen. In today’s culture, a 

“good communicator” is often defined in terms of one’s speaking ability, yet many would argue 

– 133 –
The Tongue and Quill 

that listening is just as important, if not more so. Today’s effective listeners command respect 

and admiration because listening is crucial to solving problems and making decisions.

PICK THE RIGHT TOOL FOR THE JOB: INFORMATIVE, CRITICAL, AND EMPATHIC 

LISTENING 

There are different situations where listening is important and different reasons to listen. It’s 

important to acknowledge and identify these differences because appropriate listening behaviors 

in one situation might be inappropriate in another situation. 

Part of the challenge of listening is sorting out what situation you’re in and what response is 

appropriate. One way to approach this sorting process is to look at three major reasons why we 

listen in the workplace. We’ll talk more about each of these three categories in later sections, but 

here’s a summary: 

We listen to collect information from others (Informative Listening): 

• Receiving radio instructions in an aircraft cockpit. 

• Listening to an instructor lecture on good writing technique. 

• Receiving a briefing on a change to the assignment process. 

• Obtaining medical instructions from a doctor. 

• Learning your boss’s expectations during an initial feedback session. 

We listen to judge—to evaluate a situation and make decisions (Critical Listening): 

• Investigating causes of a fatal mishap. 

• Determining which Airman to nominate for a quarterly award.

• Helping the user formally specify requirements for a new weapon system. 

• Deciding which disciplinary action to administer. 

We listen to understand and help others in situations where emotions are involved and the 

speaker, not just the message, is important (Empathic Listening):

• A subordinate is seeking advice on whether to reenlist. 

• Your spouse is worried about your next deployment. 

• A coworker is unsure how to deal with subtle discrimination. 

• Your teenager doesn’t want to move during senior year; you’ve got orders. 

• You’re trying to mend fences with a coworker after a major conflict. 

Informative, Critical, and Empathic listening categories can be used in two different ways. First, 

they can be used to characterize listening situations—that is, WHY we should be listening in this 

situation. Second, they can be used to describe listening approaches—the behaviors we use in a 

given situation and HOW we are listening. 

The real fun begins when the approach and situation are mismatched—for example, using an 

informative listening approach (taking notes, asking focused questions) in an empathic listening 

situation (an angry spouse who feels you’re neglecting the family). 

– 134 –
Effective Listening Strategies 

INFORMATIVE LISTENING 

In informative listening, the listener’s primary concern is to understand information exactly as 

transmitted. A successful listening outcome occurs when the listener understands the message 

exactly as the sender intended. Informative listening is important when receiving information 

from an established authority, or receiving information that is not open for debate. 

For example, if you’re receiving a briefing on changes to the assignment system, your goal 

should be to understand exactly what the rules are, not to sort out the reasons why you think the 

rules are stupid. If you’re receiving formal training that will be followed by a test, your primary 

goal should be to understand the material, not to evaluate whether the material should be taught 

at this level. 

SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVING INFORMATIVE LISTENING: 

1. Keep an open mind. If your primary goal is to understand the message, set aside your 

preconceptions about the topic and just listen. 

2. Listen as if you had to teach it. Many education and training specialists suggest this 

technique. Typically we expend more effort to understand a subject when we know that we have 

to teach it to someone else. By taking this approach, we have the mental fortitude to focus 

longer, ask questions when we don’t understand, and think more deeply on a topic. 

3. Take notes. Focus on main points, and don’t attempt to capture everything. This classic 

technique is used in situations where you are trying to capture objective information, such as in 

classes, staff meetings, etc. Note that if the listener and speaker are in a less formal, emotionally 

charged situation, note taking might be misconstrued as hostile behavior (i.e., being put “on the 

record,” or being documented for future adverse action) so use your judgment on whether it is 

appropriate to the situation. 

4. Exploit time gap between thinking and speaking speeds: The average speaking rate is: 

180 words per minute, while most listeners can process 500 words per minute. Use this extra 

time to mentally repeat, forecast, summarize and paraphrase the speaker’s remarks. 

5. Respond and ask appropriate questions: Good informative listening questions help you 

clarify and confirm you understand the message. Remember that you are trying to absorb as 

much information as possible, and you are less focused on making value judgments on the 

material. Here are some examples of appropriate questions or responses: 

• Repeat exact content back to the speaker—(this is common in radio communication). 

“We need toner, copy paper, and a three-hole punch from supply. I’ll get them now.”

• Paraphrase in your own words. 

“So if I understand you, then....” 

– 135 –
The Tongue and Quill 

• Ask for more specifics or details. 

“When you say a draft is due on 15 April, is that before or after the internal coordination 

process?” 

“How does the situation change if you’re married to another military member?” 

• Request an example for clarity. 

“If asking good questions can help listening performance, can you provide some examples?”

CRITICAL LISTENING 

Critical listening can be thought of as the sum of informative listening and critical thinking. In 

this case, the listener actively analyzes and evaluates the message, and listening success requires 

understanding the message and assessing its merit. The listener is evaluating the support offered 

by the speaker—as well as the speaker’s credentials and logic—and may either agree or disagree 

with the message. 

Critical listening may be appropriate when seeking input to a decision, evaluating the quality of 

staff work or a subordinate’s capabilities, or conducting research. 

SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVING CRITICAL 

LISTENING: Critical Thinking

Critical thinking is the act of 

exercising careful judgment in 

forming opinions or conclusions. 

In Chapter 4, page 46-47, we 

described how intellectual 

standards like accuracy, precision, 

relevance and clarity can be used to

evaluate the quality of information

sources. Critical thinking attempts 

to improve the quality of thought

by using these same standards. It is

self-directed, self disciplined, and

self-corrective thinking applied to 

an important problem. 

Several of the suggestions made for improving informative 

listening are equally important for critical listening: after all, 

you need to understand the message before you can 

critically analyze it. 

1. Take notes. See “Improving Informational Listening” 

on the previous page. 

2. Listen as if you had to grade it. Teaching a topic is 

tough, but grading another’s presentation of a topic is even 

tougher. Is the message clear and precise? Is the supporting 

material relevant and convincing? Does this make sense? 

Your attempt to mentally answer questions like these may 

help you stay focused on the speaker. 

3. Exploit time gap between thinking and speaking speeds: Part 2: Use the time gap 

described on the message. Remember to try to understand first and then evaluate second. Even 

when you are listening critically, don’t mentally argue with the speaker until the message is 

finished. 

– 136 –
Effective Listening Strategies 

4. Ask appropriate questions: Good critical listening questions will be probing in nature so 

you can better evaluate the intellectual content of the speaker’s message. Some examples of 

good critical listening questions can be found in The Miniature Guide to Critical Thinking by 

Dr. Richard Paul and Dr. Linda Elder. The questions help the listener evaluate how the message 

stacks up with universal intellectual standards like accuracy, relevance, fairness, etc. 

Accuracy: How could we verify or test that? Are others reporting the same results? 

Relevance: How does that fact relate to the problem?

Breadth: Do we need to consider another point of view?

Logic: Do our conclusions flow from our evidence? 

Significance: Is this the central idea? The most important problem? 

Fairness: Do we have any vested interests here? How would our opponents view this issue?

EMPATHIC LISTENING 

In empathic listening, we listen with the primary intent to 

understand the speaker and his or her frame of reference. 

Empathic listening is often useful when communication is 

emotional, or when the relationship between speaker and 

listener is just as important as the message. It is often 

used as a first step in the listening process, a prerequisite 

to informational or critical listening. Empathic listening is 

often appropriate during mentoring and nonpunitive 

counseling sessions, and can be very helpful when 

communicating with family members. Depending on the 

situation, it may also be useful in negotiation and 

teambuilding activities. 

In his best-selling book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective 

People, Dr. Stephen Covey suggests that listening be used 

to “diagnose before you prescribe” when dealing with 

others, a concept captured by the phrase: “Seek First to 

Understand, then to be Understood.” Empathic listening 

is described as a powerful tool to understand others and to build relationships. If you allow 

yourself to fully listen for both content and feeling, and then reflect that back, there are several 

productive outcomes: 

Empathic Listening: 

Not just for sissies 

Though most people quickly see that 

empathic listening skills are useful in

dealing with a spouse or a child, some

might think this listening approach is too

“sensitive” for the military environment. 

Realize that the same reasons these skills 

are relevant within a family make them

relevant within the workplace. Empathic 

listening builds trust and encourages 

cooperation, and may help small group 

cohesion—a critical factor in team

performance in combat and crisis 

situations. Though you may not see 

many empathic listening behaviors when

the bullets are flying, it lays the 

groundwork for success in that 

environment. 

The listener truly understands how the speaker feels. 

The speaker feels understood. 

The listener can give better advice. 

The speaker will be more open to it. 

“Everybody wants to talk, few want to think, and nobody wants to listen.” 

 — Anonymous 

– 137 –
The Tongue and Quill 

SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVING EMPATHIC LISTENING SKILLS 

For empathic listening to be successful, the listener must understand the content of the message 

and the speaker must feel understood. It’s this second half—making the speaker feel 

understood—which requires some specialized skills. 

Don’t you hate it when others want to “one-up” your story with something else? Or jump in and 

give advice before they understand? If you’d like to improve your emphatic listening skills, try 

to avoid the following invasive responses—they get in the way when you’re “seeking to 

understand:” 

AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL STORIES: “Your situation is just like something that happened to 

me...” “When I was your age...” 

ADVISING: Immediately providing counsel based on our own experience—whether or not it 

was requested. 

PROBING: Asking questions solely from our own frame of reference. 

EVALUATING: Immediately agreeing or disagreeing. 

These types of responses are discouraged because they distract the speaker from the critical part 

of the message, and they allow the listener to derail the conversation. Extroverts have more 

difficulty avoiding autobiographical responses than introverts do. Parents often use these 

responses with their children—the trick is to decide how much is too much. These responses are 

appropriate after the speaker feels understood and is looking for advice or help ... it’s just 

important to wait until that point. The listener should return to empathic listening if emotions 

rise again. 

The skills involved in empathic listening are easy to describe, but difficult to practice. To help 

you remember them, think about the acronym “HEAR” 

H = HEART: Commit to listening sincerely, avoid manipulation; remember the importance of 

the person, as well as the issue. 

E = EMOTIONS: Look and listen for speaker’s emotions as much as their words.

A = AVOID: Avoid advice, autobiographies, evaluation; don’t interrupt or change the subject.

R = REFLECT: Reflect back meaning and feeling until the speaker feels understood.

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Effective Listening Strategies 

SOME FINAL THOUGHTS ON LISTENING: MOTIVATION MATTERS! 

Think about the times you did a good job of listening.... Why did you do well? One of the 

reasons was probably your level of motivation. Here are four suggestions on how to enhance 

your motivation to listen in future situations. 

1. Recall why this listening situation is important. Listeners should try to remember why this 

particular situation is important. (Speakers should try to remind their audience why it’s 

important to listen, too).

Informative and listening situations: 

• Is it critical to mission success? Will this help me do my job better? 

• Will this information help me make a better decision? 

• Is it on the test? Is it a prerequisite for other material that is on the test?

• Can someone get hurt if we mess this up? 

• Will our outfit look bad if I don’t “get” it? Will I look bad? 

• Will we be discussing this later? Will I have to teach this to someone else? 

• Is understanding this important to my personal or family goals?

Critical listening situations: 

• Do I have to decide which position to take? 

• Is the evidence strong and the logic sound? 

• What unanswered questions surround this issue? What things are being left unsaid?

Empathic situations: 

• Is this speaker having trouble communicating the facts because of strong emotions? 

• Do I need to mend fences with this coworker?

• In this negotiation, am I really sure I know what is most important to the other party? 

• Does this family member count on me for emotional support?

• Do I have a personal commitment to this person, as well as this issue?

2. Identify and correct barriers to listening motivation. Both listeners and speaker can 

benefit from a hard look at factors that may inhibit listening. What factors can you control? 

What factors do you just have to live with? Fix what you can, and acknowledge what you can’t. 

Physical barriers may block listening—noisy equipment, visual distractions, etc. Avoid 

distractions when possible: If you can, sit up front. This puts less noise and visual distraction 

between you and the speaker, and allows you to more clearly see any visual aids. Sitting next 

to quiet (or boring!) people also helps you to focus on the speaker.

Personal barriers such as physical fatigue, illness and discomfort, as well as psychological 

distractions like work, family or financial problems, can also affect listening. 

– 139 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Semantic barriers may create obstacles: words or phrases with more than one meaning; 

ideas, objects or actions with more than one word image; slang, jargon or organizational 

acronyms. For example, the word “crusade” may have one connotation with an audience in 

Ohio, but have a different connotation when used in a press conference in the Middle East. 

3. Look for common ground. Our listening motivation is crippled when we adversely 

stereotype speakers or topics. Are you carrying around biases that might be triggered by a 

speaker’s age, race, religion, gender, ethnicity or personal appearance? Have you already 

decided that this topic is uninteresting, irrelevant or taught at a level that is below you? This 

kind of thinking can be lethal to listening motivation. 

To break the pattern, ask yourself some more empowering questions. What are the underlying 

commonalities and interesting interrelationships between your interests and those of the speaker?

Relate the topic at hand to your own interests. Sometimes this small, simple exercise creates an 

interesting challenge and bridges the gaps that exist. 

4. Treat listening as a learning opportunity and an intellectual challenge. So, how do you 

become motivated to listen to a topic that may, at first glance, seem boring, unrelated or 

irrelevant? 

If you’re listening to an informational briefing on a topic you’re already an expert on, listen to 

improve your ability to teach the topic to someone else. How did the speaker organize the talk?

What terms were defined? What terms were not defined? Did the speaker use interesting 

examples that you could “borrow” when you try to explain to someone else?

If you’re listening to a speaker who’s failing miserably, ask yourself how could he or she do 

better? Make some notes, and offer tactful but constructive feedback later.

Translate the problem to a personal, intellectual challenge. Effective and active listening is an 

exercise in critical thinking and can serve to sharpen your concentration skills. Develop a 

“remember game” and make listening a learning activity. 

SUMMARY 

In our eagerness to make our point or make our mark, we often forget there’s more to the story 

than what we know. Listening is a critical communication skill that doesn’t get the attention it 

deserves. Misunderstandings and mistakes in communication can be lethal in the military 

environment, and listening helps build trust between members of the Air Force team. 

In this chapter we have talked about three approaches to listening—informative, critical and 

empathic listening. Different situations call for different approaches and the listening skills used 

should be tailored to the situation. 

– 140 –
PART V: 

WORKPLACE CHALLENGES

– 141 –
Well, I made it

through my 

e-mail... time 

for Lunch! 

– 142 – 
CHAPTER 12 

ELECTRONIC 

COMMUNICATION 

This chapter covers: 

• E-mail basics. 

• Tips for effective e-mail messages. 

• Voice mail and telephone systems. 

• A glossary of computer terms. 

Electronic communication technology and software are constantly evolving. We would only 

muddy the waters if we tried to provide definitive guidance for everything you need to know, 

and most large organizations have their own written guidance. For that reason, we’ll hit the 

basics here, then refer you to local experts and policies for the rest. (If you see any unfamiliar 

words in this chapter, check the small glossary of electronic communication terms located on 

pages 152-154.) 

A computer was something on TV 

From a science fiction show of note. 

A window was something you hated to clean... 

And ram was the cousin of a goat ... 

Meg was the name of my girlfriend 

And gig was a job for the nights. 

Now they all mean different things 

And that really mega bytes. 

– 143 –
The Tongue and Quill 

E-MAIL AT WORK: KNOW WHEN IT’S AUTHORIZED 

Air Force Instruction (AFI) 33-119, Official Messaging, provides guidance on what constitutes 

official and authorized use of e-mail. Official use includes communications (including 

emergency communications) the Air Force determines necessary in the interest of the Federal 

Government. This category includes communications by deployed Air Force personnel, if 

approved by commanders in interest of morale and welfare. 

Authorized e-mail includes personal e-mail approved by the “agency designee,” who is the first 

commissioned officer or civilian above GS/GM-11 in the chain of command or supervision of 

the employee concerned. AFI 33-119 identifies several common-sense guidelines that should be 

considered when approving personal e-mail—it should be of reasonable frequency and duration, 

and it should not add significant cost or overburden the computer system and so on. 

Commanders and supervisors may authorize any use that is directed by the Uniform Code of 

Military Justice (UCMJ) and Joint Ethics Regulation, and does not interfere with mission 

performance. 

AFI 33-119 specifically prohibits the following on government communication systems: 

• Distributing copyrighted materials without consent from the copyright owner. 

• Using e-mail for financial gain. 

• Intentionally misrepresenting your identity or affiliation. 

• Sending harassing, intimidating, abusive, or offensive material. 

• Using someone else’s UserID and password without proper authority. 

• Causing congestion on the network by sending inappropriate e-mail messages (propagation 

of chain letters, etc.) or excessive data storage on the e-mail server. 

Remember that the network, like the phone, is subject to monitoring. Your e-mail is saved on 

backup tapes and servers, and it can be used against you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Do unto others in cyberspace as you would do unto them face to face.” 

 — Anonymous 

 

 

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Electronic Communication 

ELECTRONIC MAIL 

E-MAIL BASICS 

Though some communication guidelines are universal (FOCUS principles, the Seven Steps to 

Effective Communication, etc.), e-mail is a truly unique medium. 

Remember the three e-mail advantages: 

 It’s fast. 

It can get to more people. 

 It’s paperless. 

Remember the three e-mail disadvantages: 

It’s fast ... a quickly written e-mail can fan as many fires as it extinguishes. 

It can get to more people ... too many copies can clog the network and can be 

 forwarded into the wrong hands. 

It’s paperless ... but it does leave an electronic trail and power 

 fluctuations can make things disappear. 

E-mail started off as a very informal communication technique, but today it covers a spectrum

from personal to professional. Personal e-mail often includes language that is a mixture of 

shorthand and slang. (Check out page 149 for some examples ☺). It doesn’t necessarily affect 

the Air Force (unless you make a very big mistake) and you probably wouldn’t include a 

signature block at the end of the message. 

Professional or official e-mail is different—it’s more like a business memo. It does affect the 

Air Force and the rules you follow should conform to military courtesy. Though professional 

e-mail is often less formal (and less carefully reviewed) than most “paper copy” correspondence, 

there are some basic guidelines to help keep you on track. 

From: Forbes Lance Lt Col ACSC/DEOT 

To: *@* 

Cc: 

Subject: Max1 Gateway Outage 

Good morning, 

The Max1 mail gateway is down and has been since yesterday. The 42 Comm Squadron is 

working the problem and will notify me when it is back in operation. 

// SIGNED // 

Lt Col Lance Forbes 

ACSC/DEOT 

Director of Technology Operations 

3-6937 

 

PROFESSIONAL E-MAIL 

– 145 –
The Tongue and Quill 

AIR FORCE E-MAIL: SPECIAL CONSIDERATIONS 

Use appropriate greetings and closings. Address people 

with their titles when appropriate. AFI 33-119 states that 

all official e-mail will include //SIGNED// in upper case 

before the signature block to signify it contains official 

Air Force information (e.g., instructions, directions or 

policies). At a minimum, official signature blocks should 

include name, rank, position and organization, but often 

include telephone numbers (both commercial and DSN) 

and addresses (both commercial and e-mail). 

 Follow the chain of command. Comply with 

standard procedures to correspond with superiors. Be 

professional and watch what you say since e-mail is 

easily forwarded. 

 Think of the e-mail address as the recipient’s 

personal phone number. If the topic is important 

enough that you’d call the general without talking with 

the colonel, then send the message to the general. 

(Don’t quibble—sending the colonel an info copy of 

the message doesn’t count as following the chain of 

command.)

 Get approval before sending to large groups or the 

public. Check local policies for the wickets you must 

jump through before using large mail groups (all base personnel, all users, etc.) or the general 

public. Excessive e-mail sent to large mail groups can waste a great deal of time and 

overload the server. Also, just because the material is attached to an e-mail doesn’t mean 

you can avoid the standard clearance procedures. 

Signature Blocks 

If you haven’t already done so, you 

may want to set up your e-mail

formatting to automatically add a 

standard signature block to your 

e-mail. Most programs allow you to

select and save different versions for 

different purposes (formal, informal, 

etc.). 

Don’t overdo the cute logos and 

snappy fonts though—they can look 

frivolous and possibly overload the 

system. 

NOTE: An e-mail signature block 

does not verify an e-mail came from

the person indicated. However, the 

new Common Access Card (CAC) 

supports an encrypted electronic 

signature that verifies the e-mail 

truly came from the sender and has 

not been altered—reference AFI 33-

119 for more detail.

ELECTRONIC STAFFING 

If properly managed, using e-mail for coordination and staffing can increase efficiency. Use 

organizational accounts when sending correspondence to offices for coordination or action. Each 

MAJCOM typically issues their own guidance on the details of how electronic staffing should be 

implemented, and local commanders may provide additional guidelines that take into account the 

local conditions and unit operating procedures. Check out pages 222-223 for the ABCs of staff 

packages, then see your local guidance for implementation details. 

E-MAIL PROTOCOL 

“When thou enter a city, abide by its customs.” 

 — The Talmud 

E-mail protocol or “netiquette” provides guidelines for proper behavior while on-line. There are 

many ways to make social blunders and offend people when you are posting. To make matters 

worse, there is something about cyberspace that causes a “brain burp” and erases the reality that 

we are dealing with live human characters and not some ASCII characters on a screen. Respect 

– 146 – 
Electronic Communication 

the social culture, and remember that the net is multicultural. Nuances get lost in transmission. 

For the newbies floating around out there, cruise through the Netiquette suggestions on the next 

few pages. As always, remember some practices are dictated by aspects of the e-mail system

itself (software, gateways, hardware). 

RULE #1: BE CLEAR AND CONCISE 

 Make the “Subject” line communicate your purpose. Be specific: avoid titles like 

“Status”—call it “OI 36-109 Update Status.” Some audience members keep a lot of 

messages in their inboxes—a clear title will help them find your message later.

 Lead with your most important info. If your goal is to answer a question, then paste the 

question on top for clearer understanding.

 Use topic sentences if the e-mail has multiple paragraphs (see Drafting Effective Paragraphs 

[pages 68-69]). 

 Be brief and stick to the point. Follow all the basic rules for drafting clear and concise 

messages (pages 73-88). They’re even more important in e-mail because it’s tougher to read 

from a computer screen. Address the issue, the whole issue, and nothing but the issue ... and 

you get extra points if you can get your message in 24 lines (size of one screen on most 

computers).

 Use bold, italics or color to emphasize key sentences. If your e-mail doesn’t allow these, a 

common convention is to use a star on either side of key passages for emphasis ... this 

highlights the *key points.* 

 Choose readable fonts. Use 12 point or larger font size. Use easy-to-read fonts and save 

the script fonts for your signature.

RULE #2: WATCH YOUR TONE 

“Life is not so short but that there is not enough time for courtesy.” 

 — Ralph W. Emerson 

 Be polite. Treat others as you want to be treated. Use tact. Then use more tact. Then, for 

good measure, use more tact. Think of the message as a personal conversation. If you were 

face to face, would you say the same words and be as abrupt? If not—rewrite the message 

with a more positive tone (see pages 23-24).

 Be careful with humor, irony and sarcasm. Electronic postings are perceived much more 

harshly than they are intended, mainly because you cannot see body language, tone of voice 

and other nonverbals that make up 90 percent of interpersonal communications. Positive 

enthusiasm can be easily mistaken for angry defiance when you use capital letters, 

exclamation points and strong adjectives and adverbs. 

 DON’T SHOUT. Do not write in CAPITALS—it’s the e-mail version of shouting and it’s 

considered very rude. 

 Keep it clean and professional: E-mail is easily forwarded. Harassing, intimidating, 

abusive, or offensive material is obviously unacceptable, but aim for a higher standard. If 

you wouldn’t want it overheard or posted on the office bulletin board, it probably doesn’t 

belong in an e-mail. 

– 147 –
The Tongue and Quill 

 Don’t send in haste, repent at leisure. E-mail can get you into trouble—its informality 

encourages impulsive responses (like a conversation), but your words can be printed out and 

forwarded. If you’re really mad about an issue, go ahead and draft an e-mail, but don’t send 

it until you calm down and read it over. Never flame! If you do, be prepared to apologize. 

RULE #3 BE SELECTIVE ABOUT WHAT MESSAGES YOU SEND

 Don’t discuss controversial, sensitive, official use only, classified, personal, privacy act or 

unclassified info requiring special handling of documents. You just may one day see 

yourself on CNN or America’s Most Wanted.

 Remember OPSEC (Operational Security). OPSEC is a continuous analytical process which 

involves identifying sensitive information, recognizing that information could be valuable to 

an adversary, and making changes in the way we do things to reduce our risk that the 

information will be compromised. Even unclassified information, when brought together 

with other information, can create problems in the wrong hands. 

 Don’t create junk mail, forward it, or put it on a bulletin board. 

 Don’t create or send chain letters. They waste time and tie up system.

 Don’t use e-mail for personal ads; put these comments on an appropriate BBS or web page.

 Don’t fire/promote someone by e-mail. Some messages aren’t appropriate. 

RULE #4 BE SELECTIVE ABOUT WHO GETS THE MESSAGE 

 Reply to specific addressees to give those not interested a break.

 Use “reply all” sparingly.

 Get permission before using large mail groups.

 Double-check the address before mailing, especially when selecting from a global list where 

many people have similar last names.

RULE #5 CHECK YOUR ATTACHMENTS AND SUPPORT MATERIAL

 Ensure ALL info is provided the first time to keep from repeating e-mail to “add just another 

fact!” Support Your Ideas (pages 41-53).

 Before sending, check your attachments. (It’s the most common mistake.)

 Cite all quotes, references, and sources. Respect copyright and license agreements. 

RULE #6 KEEP YOUR E-MAIL UNDER CONTROL 

 Sign off the computer when you leave your workstation—defamers may read your mail or 

send hostile messages under your e-mail address!

 Create mailing lists to save time. REMEMBER: Time is a dime!

 Read and trash files daily. Create an organized directory on your hard drive to keep mailbox 

files at a minimum. Ensure record copies are properly identified and stored in an approved 

filing system.

– 148 – 
Electronic Communication 

 Acknowledge important or sensitive messages with a reply to sender: “Thanks,” “done,” 

“I’ll start working it immediately,” etc.

 If you will be away from your e-mail for an extended period, consider setting up an Auto 

Reply message that gives people an alternate point of contact.

PERSONAL E-MAIL 

Personal e-mail sometimes contains shorthand and slang that would be unacceptable in a 

professional communication. Emoticons (facial expressions) or abbreviations are sometimes 

used with humor or satire in an attempt to make sure the audience doesn’t “take things the wrong 

way.” They are a resource, but use them sparingly. Some of them are more clever than clear, 

and much of your audience may only know the smiling face. (In fact, some software 

automatically substitutes the icon “☺” for the emoticon below.)

 :-)—I’m smiling

 :-(—I’m unhappy

 ;^)—satire or sarcasm

 : ́-)—I’m crying

 :-<—very sad

 >:-(—angry

 :-@—screaming

 :-&—tongue-tied

 :-x—my lips are sealed

 :-_|—I’m being tongue-in-cheek

 %-)—I’ve been staring at the screen 

too long

 <g>—grin

 <bg>—big grin

 <vbg>—very big grin

 BRB—be right back

 BTW—by the way

 CU—see you (as in see you later)

 FWIW—for what it’s worth

 FYI—for your information

 GMTA—great minds think alike

 IMHO—in my humble or honest 

opinion

 IMNSHO—in my not-so-humble 

opinion

 JK—just kidding

 LOL—laugh out loud (it’s a way to 

tell folks you laughed at their last 

comment)

 RE—regarding

 REQ—for requests

 ROTFL—rolling on the floor 

laughing

 URGENT—time-critical messages

 YMMV—your mileage may vary

“A good listerner is not only popular everywhere but, after a 

while, he gets to know something.” 

— Wilson Mizner

– 149 –
The Tongue and Quill 

VOICE MAIL AND TELEPHONE SYSTEMS 

Well, if this is the wrong number ... why did you answer it?” 

 — James Thurber 

Voice mail, fax, and telephone systems are key to staff communication, so we’ll review some of 

the common courtesies associated with using this equipment. 

VOICE MAIL & ANSWERING MACHINES 

Different systems have different features, so check out your manual for all the bells and whistles. 

Here are some basic guidelines. 

Do ... record the message in your own voice. 

Do ... identify yourself and your organization. 

Do ... check your system regularly. 

Do ... return all messages as quickly as possible. 

Don’t ... leave amusing messages on an official system. 

If you will be unavailable for an extended period, consider these suggestions: 

Identify whom callers can contact in your absence. 

Set up your voice mail to answer after the first ring. 

A sample message: “This is SSgt_____. If you need some immediate information on ____, call 

555-7084.” 

TELEPHONE PROTOCOL 

Telephone protocol is something most of us take for granted, but here are a few tips for people 

new to the workplace. 

If you’re answering the phone... 

Do ... answer the phone on the first ring and in the way you would like to be called after 

identifying the organization. 

Do ... be pleasant and professional—you are representing your organization, as well as yourself, 

when you answer the phone. 

Do ... introduce everyone in the room if you are on a speakerphone—callers may object to the 

lack of privacy. 

Do ... put the radio and TV on hold until you’re off. 

Do ... speak clearly, keeping your lips about 1 inch from the mouthpiece. Good posture (or 

standing while speaking) will also improve your vocal quality. 

Do ... have a pencil, a memo pad, and your directories within easy reach. 

Do ... adjust your speaking tempo to match the other person’s to establish instant rapport. 

Do ... ask if someone else can help if the person isn’t there. 

Do ... take a number and call back instead of putting them on hold if you are finding something. 

– 150 – 
Electronic Communication 

Do ... give the caller the phone number before you transfer the call. 

Do ... allow the person initiating the call to bring it to a close. 

Do ... record important conversations, especially those that result in a decision, in a memo for 

record and place it in a file. 

Don’t ... transfer an angry caller. Listen carefully, never interrupt and ask questions that require 

more than a “yes” or “no.” Also, make notes and let the caller know since this shows 

you’re interested and are willing to help. 

Don’t ... put the phone over your chest to put someone on hold—your voice goes over the wires 

loud and clear—use the “hold” button. 

If you’re making the call... 

Do ... have your act together. Organize your thoughts and make notes before you place a call—

especially if you’re representing your organization, seeking help or information, calling 

long distance or talking to someone more senior in rank. 

Do ... call during core hours (0900-1100 and 1300-1500) to reduce phone tag. What’s their time 

zone? When will they return? 

Do ... identify yourself and your organization before asking to speak to _____. 

Do ... be pleasant and professional. 

Do ... ask if the person has time to talk if you plan a lengthy conversation. But you need to keep 

it as brief as possible! 

Do ... record important conversations in a memo for record and place it in a file. 

Don’t ... put the phone over your chest to put someone on hold—your voice goes over the wires 

loud and clear—use the “hold” button. 

REACH OUT & FAX SOMEONE 

As e-mail capabilities grow, faxes are becoming less common. If you fax documents regularly, 

remember the following: 

Do ... make it readable by using pica type (10 characters per inch): Times New Roman, 

Courier New, Century Schoolbook, etc. and number your pages. 

Do ... protect your document by ensuring correct receiver information is entered. 

Do ... use black and white. 

Do ... use a fax when you cannot get someone to return your call, including a short explanation, 

deadline to return call and a “Thanks for your time.” 

Do ... use Post-It® stickies to save those trees! 

Do ... send a return cover sheet with complete return address to encourage a quick reply. 

Don’t ... send a legal-sized document unless you know it can be received or personal, 

confidential, or financial info unless you know it will be protected. 

Don’t ... use italic type. It looks ragged and makes it difficult to read. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

... A SMALL GLOSSARY OF ELECTRONIC AND COMPUTER TALK 

American Standard Code for Information Interchange (ASCII)—Pronounced “asky.” The 

most common international standard for representing alphanumeric text on a computer. 

bandwidth—The number of bits that can be passed along a communications channel in a given 

period of time. Usually expressed as bits per second (bps). Each military installation has a 

limited amount of bandwidth—don’t waste it with frivolous e-mail. 

bulletin-board system (BBS)—An electronic system allowing individuals with similar interests 

to post and view messages in a public electronic form. 

binary file—A digital file format used to store non-text data. The information stored includes 

executable programs, sounds, images and videos. 

binary digit (bit)—The smallest unit of storage in a digital computer. All programs and data in a 

digital computer are composed of bits. 

browser—A software program that allows users to interact with World Wide Web sites. 

Example includes Microsoft Internet Explorer, Mozilla and Opera. 

client—A computer or program that can download, run or request services from a server. 

compact disc (CD, CD-ROM, CD-RW): A disk that stores digital information using a pattern 

of microscopic pits and lands to represent ones and zeros. One CD-ROM holds from 650 to 700 

megabytes of data or the equivalent of approximately 250,000 pages of text.

data compression—A procedure used to reduce the size of a file to reduce the disk space 

required to store the file or the bandwidth required to transmit the file. Many different 

compression formats are available and each requires a program to compress and expand the 

file—zip format is one of the most common. 

digital video disk (DVD, DVD-R, DVD-RW)—A disk that stores digital information using a 

pattern of pits and lands to represent ones and zeros. A specially formatted DVD is used to store 

movies. One DVD-ROM holds approximately 4.7 gigabytes of information or the equivalent of 

approximately 1.8 million pages of text. 

Electronic mail (E-mail)—A message sent electronically over a computer network, such as a 

LAN or the Internet. 

emoticon—Facial expressions originally drawn using ASCII characters and more recently drawn 

using an extended character set. (See page 149 for examples). 

encryption—Changing the contents of a message in a manner to obscure the contents while still 

allowing the intended audience to read the message. 

executable—A file containing a set of instructions to perform some process on a computer. A 

word processor and Internet browser are examples of an executable. 

facsimile (fax)—A method of transmitting images of printed matter that predates digital 

computer networks. This method traditionally used phone lines but can now be implemented 

using computer networks. 

flame mail—An e-mail message critical of some person or position taken by a person. Usually 

more derogatory than constructive. 

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Electronic Communication 

frequently asked questions (FAQ)—A list of questions and corresponding answers focusing on 

a specific topic. The FAQ is typically provided to members of a community to avoid the 

repetitious answering of questions asked by new users. 

home page—The web page providing the entry point for a web site (see web page and web site). 

hyperlink—A way to link access to information of various sources together within a web 

document. A way to connect two Internet resources via a simple word or phrase on which a user 

can click to start a connection. 

hypertext—A method for storing, retrieving, and presenting information based on the 

processing power of computers. Allows computerized linking and almost instantaneous retrieval 

of information based on a dynamic index. 

Hypertext Markup Language (HTML)—The native language of the WWW.

Instant Messaging (IM)—A type of communications service that enables you to create a kind 

of private chat room with another individual in order to communicate in real time over the 

Internet, analogous to a telephone conversation but using text-based, not voice-based, 

communication. Typically, the instant messaging system alerts you whenever somebody on your 

private list is online. You can then initiate a chat session with that particular individual. 

Internet—The overarching global computer network connecting computers, servers and local 

area networks across the globe. 

intranet—A network with restricted availability. An intranet may provide web pages, printing 

and e-mail services similar to those available using the Internet, but only for a restricted set of 

users. Most military bases run an intranet that is only available to personnel on that base. 

Internet Relay Chat (IRC)—A communications program that allows real-time text-based 

conversations along multiple users. 

list server—A computer running an electronic mailing list subscribed to by individuals with 

some common area of interest. Individuals typically subscribe by sending an e-mail asking to be 

placed on the list. Once added to the list, subscribers automatically receive messages sent to the 

list by other subscribers and may send their own messages to the list which are then relayed to all 

other subscribers. 

local area network (LAN)—A system occupying a relatively small geographic area providing 

digital communications between automated data processing equipment, such as computers and 

printers. 

modem—A device allowing a computer to send and receive data over telephone lines. 

netiquette—Commonly accepted etiquette used when communicating over a computer 

network—network etiquette. Specific forms of communications might include e-mail, list server 

or IRC. 

newbie—An individual new to using computers or new to a specific group.

newsgroup—A network service allowing individuals to post, read messages, and respond to 

messages posted by other users. Newsgroups may be moderated or unmoderated. If the 

newsgroup is moderated, messages may be removed by the moderator and user posting 

privileges controlled by the moderator. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

organizational e-mail account—An e-mail account used to receive and send messages on 

behalf of an organization. This type of account allows an organization to maintain a single 

address for correspondence despite changing responsibilities within that organization. 

server—A computer that responds to requests for information from client computers—see 

client.

web browser—See browser.

web page—An electronic document available on the Internet or an intranet that is viewable 

using a web browser (see browser, Internet and intranet). 

web site—A collection of related web pages.

World Wide Web (WWW)—The entire web pages on all of the web sites available through the 

Internet. 

The Ten Commandments For Computer Ethics 

1. Thou shalt not use a computer to harm other people. 

2. Thou shalt not interfere with other people’s computer 

work. 

3. Thou shalt not snoop around in other people’s files. 

4. Thou shalt not use a computer to steal. 

5. Thou shalt not use a computer to bear false witness. 

6. Thou shalt not use or copy software for which you have 

not paid. 

7. Thou shalt not use other people’s computer resources 

without authorization. 

8. Thou shalt not appropriate other people’s intellectual 

output. 

9. Thou shalt think about the social consequences of the 

program you write. 

10. Thou shalt use a computer in ways that show 

consideration and respect. 

 – from the Computer Ethics Institute 

– 154 – 
CHAPTER 13 

MEETINGS 

This chapter covers: 

• Meeting planning—how to prepare for success. 

• Meeting agendas and execution. 

• Preparing the meeting minutes. 

• Tips on group dynamics and making meetings fun. 

All of us attend meetings. Some of us feel we attend too many of them. Others may be 

conducting more business electronically, and attending fewer meetings than in the past. But, in 

today’s world of trying to do things “faster and smarter,” technology is not always all it’s 

cracked up to be. How many times have you e-mailed someone who works 20 feet or one office 

away? Have you ever spent 20 minutes to write an e-mail to four people to discuss a topic that 

would take 2 minutes of a meeting? Despite the surge in electronic staffing there is no substitute 

for the human element found in meetings; thus it is unlikely they will ever be replaced. 

So why does the mere word “meeting” strike a nerve in so many of us? Probably we’ve all 

attended so many that were a huge waste of time. But meetings don’t have to be that way; there 

are ways to make them better! If they are done right, they can go a long way in helping your 

organization run more efficiently. Simply put, they’re used to share information, solve 

problems, plan, brainstorm or motivate. Whatever the purpose, it’s good to know some basics 

about conducting an effective meeting. That’s what this chapter is all about. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

RUNNING AN EFFECTIVE MEETING 

At some time or another, you may be the one calling the meeting. A meeting doesn’t always 

have to be a major production, but there are some key points to consider during planning, 

execution and follow-up. Here are some tips on making the most of everyone’s time—including 

your own! 

PLANNING YOUR MEETING 

Success or failure in a meeting can usually be traced to the planning phase. Do your homework, 

and you’re well on your way to success. If you don’t do your homework, you’ll pay a heavy 

price during the execution and follow-up phases. 

Listed below are the key issues associated with planning a meeting. As you step through these 

items, remember to check on what is standard operating procedure in your organization. 

Meetings come in all flavors—from totally spontaneous to highly structured and ceremonial. 

Most are in the middle. If this group has been meeting regularly for a while, try to find out how 

they’ve done business in the past. 

1. DECIDE IF A MEETING IS APPROPRIATE 

In the book How to Make Meetings Work, Michael Doyle and David Strauss identify seven 

situations when having meeting might be a good idea: 

• You want information or advice from the group. 

• You want to involve a group in solving a problem or making a decision. 

• An issue needs to be clarified. 

• You want to address concerns with the entire group. 

• The group itself wants a meeting. 

• There is a problem that involves people from different groups. 

• There is a problem, but it’s not clear what it is or who is responsible for dealing with it. 

In these situations, face-to-face discussion can help speed up the process. If your goal is just to 

pass on information, ask yourself if e-mail is a viable and appropriate substitute for the meeting. 

The purpose of many meetings is simply to share information and keep people up to date on a 

project. In these cases, try to substitute the meeting with an 

e-mail. This saves everyone’s time and still keeps everyone in the loop, and you’re still meeting 

the goal for the meeting you just avoided! 

Local policy may dictate that some groups meet weekly, monthly, or quarterly, but if you’re not 

directed to meet and don’t need to ... don’t! 

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Meeting 

2. DEFINE YOUR PURPOSE 

Every meeting should have a purpose. If it doesn’t, you shouldn’t meet. When you think about 

your purpose, try to define it in terms of a product that you want at the end of the meeting, and 

what it will be used for. “Talking about Issue X” is not an ideal purpose statement for the 

meeting, because it describes a process, not a product—try these alternatives: 

• To identify why Issue X is a problem. [The product is a clearer understanding of the 

problem.] 

• To brainstorm ways to resolve Issue X. [The product is a list of ideas about potential 

solutions.]

• To discuss different options for resolving Issue X. [The product is list of pros and cons ... 

the decision will happen later.]

• To decide how the unit will handle Issue X. [The product is discussion of pros and cons and 

a decision. Make sure attendees know who makes the decision. Is it the team, or is it the 

boss?] 

Most Air Force professionals want to feel like they’ve accomplished something in a meeting. A 

clear purpose for the meeting is the first step towards success. 

3. DECIDE WHO SHOULD BE INVITED 

Have you gone to a meeting and after 5 or 10 minutes asked yourself, “Why am I here?” 

Remember that when you are holding a meeting! Invite only those directly involved in the issues 

being discussed. Meetings can be a time waster if too many or too few participants attend. Too 

many people equals chaos; too few means decisions have to be put on hold—bad news. 

If you’re trying to solve a problem or make a decision on a controversial issue, make sure you 

have adequate representation from all groups who have a voice in the decision. If you only 

invite people with one point of view, your meeting will run smoothly, but your decision may not 

stand up later. 

4. DECIDE WHERE AND WHEN THE MEETING SHOULD OCCUR 

Check the schedules of any heavy hitters. Often the scheduling of your meetings will be 

determined by the schedule of any key personnel that will be attending. If you’re briefing a 

three-star, odds are that his secretary will be telling you when the meeting can occur, not the 

other way around. 

If possible, pick the time of day to meet your purpose. If you’ve got flexibility, you might 

select the time of day for your meeting to help you meet your objectives. If you want your 

meeting attendees fired up and eager to contribute, you may want to schedule a meeting in the 

morning, the time when most people have more energy. If you want them inpatient and anxious 

to get done, try just before lunch. If you want them agreeable, try right after lunch. If you want 

them asleep, try midafternoon. Finally, you might try the just-before-quitting time tactic. If 

you’re lucky, you might have any opposition collapse just so they can catch the car pool. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

Try to avoid meetings the first thing Monday morning. Give folks some time to read 

e-mail and prioritize the days and week ahead. If your organization is a service organization, 

don’t schedule meetings during customer service hours. The “Closed for Training” sign on the 

door does not fare well in the customer satisfaction department! 

Keep it under an hour, or plan for breaks. Keep in mind that after 20 minutes or so, our 

minds tend to get lazy and wander. Try to keep the flow of the meeting going so that no agenda 

item goes longer than 20 minutes. Watch the clock (a timekeeper comes in handy). Try to keep 

the meeting to 90 minutes or less, and plan for breaks if the meeting goes over an hour. 

Reserve the room. Follow established procedures to reserve a conference room that can handle 

the attendee list. 

5. PLAN FOR CAPTURING MEETING INFORMATION 

If this is not a routine meeting with an appointed recorder, take a moment to think about how you 

will capture the meeting information, both in the meeting itself and afterwards. Capturing the 

information is critical, but how best to do it will depend on the nature of the meeting. 

Think about how you’re going to capture information during the meeting. Will you use a white 

board? (If so, make sure your conference room has one ... or try to borrow a portable 

whiteboard that can print out what is written on them.) Will you capture brainstorming efforts 

using flip charts and “butcher paper”—oversized paper that can be taped up on a wall and looked 

at by a group? Do you have an administrative support person that can act as a recorder? Can 

you ask a coworker to take notes?

Meeting minutes capture the process and outcome of the meeting. They “close the loop” on the 

meeting, and let the attendees know what was decided. If you have administrative personnel that 

can prepare minutes, consider having them attend the meeting to act as the recorder. On the 

other hand, drafting the minutes yourself has one clear advantage: you can make sure they 

include what they should. 

Explaining the objectives, reviewing the agenda, going over the ground

rules and making sure everyone knows each other and understands why 

they’re in attendance. 

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Meeting 

6. SEND OUT AN AGENDA 

– 159 –

Create an agenda and send it to attendees no later than 1 or 2 

days prior to the meeting. If this is not a time critical issue, if 

the attendees don’t work for you, or if you are asking people to 

present material or review long documents prior to the meeting, 

try to give at least a week’s notice. Also tell presenters to bring 

a copy of their material to leave with the recorder. 

The agenda should include the date, time, location and purpose 

of the meeting. This advance notice gives everyone an 

opportunity to prepare their thoughts and know where the 

meeting is going before they get there. 

If you are asking people to present material or prepare their 

thoughts, make sure they know how much time they have been 

allocated and when they will present. You may also want to 

use a detailed agenda on the day of the meeting to keep the 

group on track and stay focused. 

If you have trouble coming up with a solid agenda, chances are 

you really don’t have a reason to meet in the first place (see tip 

one)! 

7. REMEMBER: MEETINGS CAN BE CANCELLED 

Before you take 5, 10 or 20 people away from productive work time ask yourself these 

questions: 

Presenting material 

at a meeting 

At some time or another, you

may be asked to present

information at a meeting,

possibly in a briefing format. 

Whether or not you have time 

to prepare, it’s always 

important to remember the 

“Seven Steps for Effective 

Communication” introduced in

Chapter 2. A meeting is just 

another communication 

platform and it’s still important

to analyze your purpose and 

audience, research your topic, 

support your ideas, organize,

draft, edit and seek feedback. 

If you don’t, you may fail to

hit the target, lead the audience 

to a place where no man has

gone before, or worst case 

scenario, waste everyone’s

time.

• Is there a real need for this meeting? You might receive feedback from your agenda that 

indicates that the business can be accomplished by other means. Consider sending an e-mail 

or a memo to disseminate information. 

• Will key decisionmakers (if a decision is the goal) and/or the majority of the group be 

present? If key decision makers can’t be there, why bother? If the key decision makers are 

the entire group, make sure the majority can attend. Otherwise you spend precious time

updating those who missed the meeting before you can come to consensus on the issue. It’s 

better to put the meeting on hold. 
The Tongue and Quill 

RUNNING YOUR MEETING 

You won’t peg out anyone’s fun meter by dragging 

a meeting out unnecessarily. It’s your job to keep it 

focused, and separate the “wheat from the chaff.” 

A word about Robert’s Rules of Order

Formal meetings sometimes follow the 

sequence, procedures and terminology

documented in Robert's Rules of Order, a 

set of rules used in Parliamentary 

procedure. General Henry M. Robert first

published the rules in 1876, and there are 

several updated versions and summaries 

available in print or on the web. (For 

example, the complete 1915 version is 

available on line at 

http://www.bartleby.com/176/

Most Air Force meetings do not use

Robert’s Rules of Order, and we won’t go

into them here. The terminology is 

somewhat formal, and the structure seems 

overly constraining to some. Even so, you 

should be aware that they exist as agreedupon set of guidelines on how to organize 

a potentially chaotic situation. 

Also, some day you may find yourself in a 

meeting where there are a lot of rules, 

where people read out the minutes of the

previous meeting, and where parts of the 

meeting seem scripted (“With a quorum

present, the meeting is called to order...”). 

If this happens to you, don’t panic. 

They’re probably following some form of 

Robert’s Rules of Order. Ask about them, 

or look them up yourself. Everything will 

become clear. 

START ON TIME 

Start on time with an upbeat note, and don’t wait for 

tardy attendees. State your desired outcome. 

FOLLOW YOUR AGENDA 

One of the worst things you can do is to ignore your 

own agenda. It drives people nuts! Consider a 

review of the detailed agenda in the opening 

minutes of the meeting to remind people of the 

goals and plan for the meeting. 

Regular meetings usually follow a fixed order of 

business. Below is a typical example: 

1. Introduction/call to order. 

2. Attendance/roll call of members present. 

3. Acknowledgment/correction of previous meeting 

minutes. 

4. Reports from committees/persons [these items

were previously identified in the Agenda]. 

5. Old Business from previous minutes/Action 

Items. 

6. New Business previously designated for 

consideration at this meeting [identified in Agenda]. 

7. Round table/New Business not previously 

identified for consideration at this meeting. 

8. Appointments/Assignments [new committees or 

personnel changes].

Some suggest the following allocation of time: 

• 1⁄4 of meeting—past agenda items and follow-up (old business) 

• 1⁄2 of meeting—current agenda items

• 1⁄4 of meeting—future agenda items 

Establish the date, time, and location of the next meeting, if needed and if ready. Evaluate the 

meeting before adjourning. Are there things that need to be improved?

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Meeting 

UNDERSTAND GROUP DYNAMICS AND LOOK FOR WAYS TO MAKE MEETINGS FUN 

If you’re in charge of a group that will be meeting over a period of time, it pays to learn the 

basics about group dynamics. Also, if you dare, you might want to try to inject some fun into 

your meetings. (As always—know your audience. Some believe meetings should be miserable 

... anything else is unnatural!) We’ll talk more about both these topics at the end of the chapter. 

FOLLOWING UP: PREPARING MEETING MINUTES 

If you did your homework, following up is a snap—it involves sending out meeting minutes and 

starting the whole cycle over again. Prepare meeting minutes in the official memo format. 

Minutes are a clear summary of the participants’ comments. They document planned or 

completed action. Date the minutes the day they are distributed. You may list names of 

members present in two columns to save space. 

Place information regarding a future meeting in the last paragraph. When a person signs a paper 

as a member of a board or committee, the signature element indicates that person’s status on that 

board or committee, not any other position the person may hold. Type “Approved as written” 

two lines below the recorder’s signature block, followed by the approving authority’s signature 

block. 

Minutes are typed either single or double-spaced, with additional space between items of

business and paragraphs. 

No erasures should appear in the minutes. All typing should be neat and orderly, paying 

particular attention to uniformity of margins and text. 

All names should be spelled correctly; acceptable grammar should be used; sentences should be 

well constructed and correctly punctuated. All verbs should be in past tense. 

The order of the minutes usually coincides with the order of the agenda, and the following items

are generally included: 

• Kind of meeting (regular, special, etc.) 

• Day, date, time and place of meeting 

• The word “Minutes” in the heading 

• Name of the meeting body 

• Opening paragraph; i.e., The Executive Committee met for _____ meeting on day, date 

and time 

• Members present 

• Members absent 

• Action taken on last meeting’s minutes 

• Reports 

• Current business, with complete discussions and conclusions 

• Old Business, with discussions, and follow-up, as recommended 

• New Business, with discussions and recommendations 

• Adjournment 

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The Tongue and Quill 

MEETINGS AND GROUP DYNAMICS 

All meetings, teams or groups move through predictable stages. You will save yourself a lot of 

frustration if you are familiar with these stages. Let’s look at a snapshot of these stages first and 

then discuss them in more detail. 

FORMING: a period of uncertainty in which members try to determine their place in 

the team and the procedures and rules of the team. 

STORMING: conflicts begin to arise as members resist the influence of the team and 

rebel against accomplishing the task. 

NORMING: the team establishes cohesiveness and commitment, discovering new ways 

to work together and setting norms for appropriate behavior. 

PERFORMING: the team develops proficiency in achieving its goals and becomes more 

flexible in its patterns of working together. 

Because the forming, storming and norming stages result in minimal output, it is tempting to try 

to rush through or short circuit these stages and hope the team can thereby achieve peak 

productivity. You may want to stand up and say, “Can’t we just all be friends?” Although 

seductive, this idea is dysfunctional. Just as individuals go through predictable stages of growth 

(depending on age, experience, maturity and other factors), teams go through predictable stages. 

The duration of these stages depends on factors such as individual and team maturity, task 

complexity, leadership, organizational climate and external climate. Teams can fixate at various 

stages. Some teams (like some people) are never fully functioning. How can you reduce the 

nonproductive time commonly spent in the forming and storming stages? Given that these stages 

are inevitable, try sharing rumors, concerns and expectations of the team to minimize their 

tensions, fears or anxiety. Also, encourage the team members to contact one another so that 

there will be no “surprises.” Therefore, an atmosphere of trust will be achieved early on

(norming stage), allowing for interpersonal issues to be put aside in favor of task issues and for 

the team to move on to the performing stage. 

Read on for more detailed descriptions of these stages from The Team Handbook written by 

Peter R. Scholtes. 

FORMING. When a team is forming, members cautiously explore the boundaries of acceptable 

group behavior. This is a stage of transition from individual to member status, and of testing the 

leader’s guidance both formally and informally. Because there is so much going on to distract 

the members’ attention in the beginning, the team accomplishes little, if anything, that concerns 

its project goals. Don’t despair and flush your project down the toilet! This is perfectly normal! 

STORMING. Storming is probably the most difficult stage for the team. You may ask yourself, 

“What was I thinking?” The team members begin to realize the task is different and more 

difficult than they imagined, becoming testy, blameful, or overzealous. Impatient about the lack 

of progress, but still too inexperienced to know much about decision making or the scientific 

approach, members argue about just what actions the team should take. They try to rely solely 

on their personal and professional experience, resisting any need for collaborating with other 

team members. Their behavior means team members have little energy to spend on progressing 

towards the team’s goal. Still, they are beginning to understand one another. 

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Meeting 

NORMING. During this stage, members reconcile competing loyalties and responsibilities. 

They accept the team, team ground rules (or “norms”), their roles in the team, and the 

individuality of fellow members. Emotional conflict is reduced as previously competitive 

relationships become more cooperative. As team members begin to work out their differences, 

they now have more time and energy to spend on the project. Thus, they are able to at last start 

making significant strides. 

PERFORMING. By this stage, the team has settled its relationships and expectations. They 

can begin performing—diagnosing and solving problems, and choosing and implementing 

changes. At last team members have discovered and accepted each other’s strengths and 

weaknesses, and learned what their roles are. The team is now an effective, cohesive unit. You 

can tell when your team has reached this stage because you start getting a lot of work done—

finally! 

MEETINGS: CAN THEY BE FUN? 

Have you ever wondered why pagers miraculously go off during meetings or “scheduling 

conflicts” come up at the last minute? It’s because many people avoid meetings like the plague. 

Let’s face it ... they’re boring! Does that mean you should hold meetings like a standup 

comedian? No! In fact, you need to really know your audience before you go out on this limb. 

But you can interject some fun into meetings to encourage participation and creativity. Here are 

just a few ideas to get you going. 

• Hold your meeting off-site. We military types are creatures of habit. This does not 

change at meetings. Everyone usually sits in the same seat, brings the same coffee mug, 

brings up the same questions and takes breaks at the same time ... you get the picture. 

Sometimes a change of scenery is all that is needed to rejuvenate a brain-dead group. 

Bonus: Change the meeting time to coincide with lunch. This gives the group a chance 

to talk about “non-meeting issues” and connect in a more nonthreatening environment 

over a meal.

• Have a contest to generate ideas for projects. A little friendly competition can be a boost 

for all and bring great results.

• Tone down the conversation dominators with “fees.” Attendees are required to pay each 

time they interject, and they are limited to inputs. Be careful with this one ... you don’t 

want to shut folks down either.

• Appoint a “Director of Creativity” for each meeting to come up with ideas like these! 

Appoint the next meeting’s director at the conclusion of the current meeting to give them

time to plan. Have the group vote on the favorite idea at the end of the year and give out 

a humorous award. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

SUMMARY 

Although many of us don’t really look forward to meetings they are indeed a fact of life in 

today’s Air Force and they certainly serve a purpose in our mission and how we get things done 

on a daily basis. This chapter gave you the nuts and bolts for holding more successful and 

productive meetings. Remember the “Seven Steps for Effective Communication” and the tips 

introduced in this chapter as you think about and prepare your next meeting. And as always, pay 

attention to the local guidelines for conducting meetings in your organization. Good luck! 

Never invite people who don’t need to be there. Never meet without an

agenda. Never start late. Don’t get off the subject. Don’t tolerate

excessive interruptions. 

– 164 –
PART VI: 

THE QUILL 

This section expands upon the functions and 

formats for written communications with the 

US Air Force as outlined in Air Force Manual 

(AFMAN) 33-326, Preparing Official 

Communications. We’ve included the most 

frequently used formats, which are only a 

fraction of the total used throughout the 

Department of Defense. Although functions 

and formats may differ somewhat among 

major commands, the information that follows 

should be useful at any command or staff 

level. However, if your organization 

publishes a supplement to AFMAN 33-326, 

an OI (operating instruction), or its own 

administrative style guide, be sure to check 

those sources for command-unique guidance 

on preparing staff work. 

AIR FORCE 

WRITING 

PRODUCTS 

AND 

TEMPLATES 

– 165 –
The Tongue and Quill 

WHEN YOU WRITE FOR “THE BOSS” 

There may be a time when you will be tasked to prepare a staff instrument for a general officer’s 

signature. Is there an added dimension when we write for a general officer? From discussions 

with numerous generals and their executive officers, the answer is “yes.” These are facts and 

hints to help you through this added dimension! 

 First ... see if the boss has preferences! Run to see the general’s secretary! It will ease 

your pain. For instance, when one particular general writes personal letters to higher ranking 

individuals, he uses “Respectfully” as the salutation, and for lower ranking individuals, 

“Sincerely.” Use “Sincerely” on all personal memos. Now having said that ... it’s up to 

your commander’s preference. Some generals write “Very Respectfully” above “Sincerely” 

when addressing higher ranking officers. 

 Read step one of the seven-step checklist. Learn all you can about the general’s views on 

the subject and the relationship with the addressee. Try to capture the general’s wider 

perspective before you pick up your pen. What peripheral issues facing the general could be 

directly or indirectly affected by your words? What is the desired purpose? What tone 

(pages 23-24), pattern (pages 59-62) and correspondence style (pages 167-169) are most 

appropriate?

 Keep it simple or face frustration. A general’s time is spread over many issues. Get to the 

point, make it, and move on. If the addressee needs only the time, don’t send instructions on 

how to build a clock. Your first draft will probably be twice as long as needed. If you must 

include details, use attachments. 

 Go easy on the modifiers. A general doesn’t need to be very interested in something—

being interested is sufficient. Also, avoid emotionalism.

 Quality check, quality check, quality check! From your logic to your grammar, from your 

facts and figures to your format, triple check your work. You have nothing to lose but your 

credibility! HINT: Ensure you use the current address since military members move around 

so often. 

 Go one step further. Look efficient when doing a personal letter and provide the general 

with the “go-by name” of the addressee. Try using a yellow sticky! 

 Don’t expect your glistening product to fly the first time. Not even the best staffers are 

clairvoyant. 

Why should we write differently for general officers? Why should that added dimension apply 

only to the boss? There’s no good reason. We’d become better communicators if we assume all

of our correspondence were “starbound.” 

– 166 – 
PERSONAL 

LETTER 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE 

HEADQUARTERS UNITED STATES AIR FORCE 

 15 Jan 04 

SMSgt Robin Edwards 

 Assistant Executive 

1700 Air Force Pentagon 

Washington DC 20330-1700 

Mr. Peter Overall 

 ECI/EDECT 

50 South Turner Boulevard 

Maxwell AFB-Gunter Annex AL 36118-5643 

Dear Mr. Overall 

Thanks for your recent efforts to analyze the feasibility of creating a world wide 

web home page to educate customers on intelligence capabilities. The extensive research you 

performed during your off-duty time will assist Air Force Intelligence in determining the 

most effective methods to advertise our capabilities to support warfighting. 

We plan to use the background papers and prototype hypertext computer program you 

developed to brief the Technology Tiger Team in our upcoming general officer summit. 

Your work and demonstrations will add credibility to our concepts and visions. Customers 

worldwide will be able to instantaneously access up-to-date information to understand how 

to integrate and use intelligence as an integral part of warfighting. 

We look forward to continuing our work with you. We found your input invaluable in 

our efforts to disseminate and communicate intelligence capabilities to our many customers 

throughout the world. 

 Sincerely

Robin Edwards 

ROBIN EDWARDS, SMSgt, USAF 

 cc: 

Mrs. Elizabeth Adams, ECI/EDECT 

– 167 –
DRAFT--NOT FOR IMPLEMENTATION OR COMPLIANCE

The Tongue and Quill 

– 168 – 

 DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE 

AIR UNIVERSITY (AETC) 

 

 [1.75 inches or 10 lines from top of page] 5 Sep 04¶

¶ 

¶

Chaplain, Lieutenant Colonel David Davis¶

Staff Chaplain¶ 

105 South Hansell¶

Maxwell AFB AL 36112-6332¶

¶ 

¶ 

Chaplain, Lieutenant Colonel Fred Walker, CAP¶ 

824 Sunrise Court¶

Marshall MO 65340-2846¶

¶ 

 Dear Fred¶ 

¶ 

Thanks for your fax. Here is the information you requested concerning the Air Force’s use of the 

personal letter. This letter also functions as a cover letter for the draft copy of the new CAP Chaplain 

Handbook I promised you.¶

¶ 

Personal letters are usually prepared on letterhead stationery with the sender’s address element one to two 

lines below the date. Font size should be Times New Roman 12 point. The date is placed 10 lines from the 

top of the page on the right side. The salutation is normally in the format “Dear Xxxxx” and complimentary 

close is normally “Sincerely.” Begin the salutation one line space under the receiver’s address. Type the 

complimentary close element “Sincerely” one line space below the text of the letter three spaces to the right of 

page center. Notice that you do not use punctuation after either. The signature element begins five line spaces 

below and aligned with the complimentary close element. Place your list of attachments one line below the 

signature element and flush with the left margin.¶ 

¶ 

Personal letters are really official memos prepared in a personal style. They are appropriate for welcome 

letters, letters of appreciation, letters of condolence, or any other occasion when a situation might be 

better handled in a personal manner. Attachments, if any, are listed the same way as in an official 

memorandum.¶

¶ 

Hope this answers your questions. I look forward to your input on the handbook. My e-mail address 

is david.davis@maxwell.af.mil. Look at my homepage at http://chapel.maxwell.af.mil/.¶ 

¶ 

 Sincerely [3 spaces to the right of page center]¶ 

¶ 

¶

¶

¶ David Davis

¶ [Start signature block on fifth line] DAVID DAVIS, Chaplain 

Lieutenant Colonel, USAF¶

¶ 

Attachment:¶ 

Draft CAP Chaplain Handbook¶

1-inch left and right margins 

NOTE: Triple space equal 2 blank lines 

 Double space equal 1 blank line

2-inch top margin and 1-inch bottom

margin
Personal Letter 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE 

AIR UNIVERSITY (AETC) 

 23 May 04 

Colonel Jacob R. Bradley

Director of Plans and Programs 

550 McDonald Street

Maxwell AFB-Gunter Annex AL 36118-5643 

Colonel William J. Nash

Program Director 

75 South Butler Avenue 

Patrick AFB FL 85469-6357 

Dear Colonel Nash 

 Thank you for your outstanding presentation to the Air Command and Staff College Class 

of 2003. Your briefing was right on target and expertly integrated many aspects of our 

curriculum into a focused leadership perspective. Our students face increasingly complex 

challenges, and your keen insights were invaluable in preparing them for the future. 

 We appreciate your support and look forward to future visits. 

 Sincerely 

Jacob R. Bradley 

JACOB R. BRADLEY, Colonel, USAF 

Letter of Appreciation 

– 169 – 
The Tongue and Quill 

FORMS OF ADDRESS, SALUTATION, AND CLOSE 

In the Office of the Secretary of Defense Manual for Written Material there are some general, 

convenient forms of address for both letters and envelopes. We think these are important enough 

to include here. Using titles correctly in the salutation of a letter makes a good impression. We

suggest a word of caution ... avoid the use of gender distinctive titles. This can be generally 

done by rewriting or varying the layout. 

To summarize some of the key rules to follow when addressing a letter to an individual by name

or title, we have provided these points: 

• Do not use punctuation with the address element. Do not use punctuation after the last word 

of salutation and complimentary close. 

• Spell out all titles of address (except Dr., Mr. and Mrs.), always using only one title. 

(Dr. James Norrix or James Norrix, MD; not Dr. James Norrix, MD). 

• Address correspondence by professional or organizational title when the name or the gender, 

or both are not known. (Dear Resource Manager, Dear Department Head, etc.). 

• Use Ms. with the surname or first and last name when a woman’s marital status is unknown. 

Using the title “Ms.” is okay as a general rule, unless the person prefers Miss or Mrs. (Ms. 

Shroyer or Maxine Shroyer). In business use a married woman’s first name (Mrs. Lee 

Reising); socially, the custom has been to use her husband’s first name (Mrs. Stephen 

Reising). 

• Respond to a letter written jointly by more than three people by preparing single replies, or 

replying to the person signing and mentioning the others early in the letter. 

• Address all Presidential appointees and federal and state elected officials as “The 

Honorable,” even when addressing social correspondence. As a general rule, do not address 

county and city officials, except mayors, as “The Honorable.” 

• Use “Judge,” “General,” “The Honorable,” etc., if appropriate. People, once entitled, may 

keep the title throughout their lifetime. Some dignitaries holding doctoral degrees may 

prefer the use of “Dr.” 

• Use two lines for a couple with different last names with the man’s name on the bottom.

• Use Miss, Mrs. or Ms. with a woman’s surname, but Madam with formal or position titles. 

(Dear Mrs. Carolyn Brown, but Dear Madam Justice or Dear Madam Secretary)

– 170 –
Personal Letter 

To keep down the following samples, we’ve substituted an * for Mr., Mrs., Miss, Ms., or Madam. 

The White House: 

The President The President 

The White House 

Washington DC 20500-0001 

Dear * President 

Respectfully yours 

Spouse of the President * (full name) 

The White House 

Washington DC 20500-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Assistant to the President The Honorable (full name) 

Assistant to the President 

The White House 

Washington DC 20500-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Secretary to the President The Honorable (full name) 

Secretary to the President 

The White House 

Washington DC 20500-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Secretary to the President 

(with military rank) 

(full rank) (full name) 

Secretary to the President 

The White House 

Washington DC 20500-0001 

Dear (rank) (surname) 

Sincerely

The Vice President: 

The Vice President The Vice President 

The White House 

Washington DC 20500-0001 

Dear * Vice President 

Respectfully yours 

The President of the Senate The Honorable (full name) 

President of the Senate 

Washington DC 20510-0001 

Dear * President 

Sincerely

The Federal Judiciary: 

The Chief Justice The Chief Justice of the United States

The Supreme Court of the United States

Washington DC 20543-0001 

Dear Chief Justice (surname) 

Sincerely

Associate Justice Justice (surname) 

The Supreme Court of the United States

Washington DC 20543-0001 

Dear Justice (surname) 

Sincerely

Retired Associate Justice The Honorable (full name) 

(local address)

Dear Justice (surname) 

Sincerely

Presiding Justice The Honorable (full name) 

Presiding Justice 

(name of court) 

(local address)

Dear Justice (surname) 

Sincerely

Chief Judge of a Court The Honorable (full name) 

Chief Judge of the (court; if a US district 

 court, give district) 

(local address)

Dear Judge (surname) 

Sincerely

Clerk of a Lower Court * (full name) 

Clerk of the (court; if a US district court, 

 give district) 

(local address)

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

– 171 –
The Tongue and Quill 

The Congress: 

President pro Tempore of the Senate The Honorable (full name) 

President pro Tempore of the Senate 

United States Senate 

Washington DC 20510-0001 

Dear Senator (surname) 

Sincerely

Committee Chairman, US Senate The Honorable (full name) 

Chairman, Committee on (name) 

United States Senate 

Washington DC 20510-0001 

Dear Madam Chair 

or Mr. Chairman 

Sincerely

Subcommittee Chairman, US Senate The Honorable (full name) 

Chairman, Subcommittee on (name) 

(parent committee) 

United Sates Senate 

Washington DC 20510-0001 

Dear Senate (surname) 

Sincerely

Senator 

(Washington DC office) 

The Honorable (full name) 

United States Senate 

Washington DC 20510-0001 

Dear Senator (surname) 

Sincerely

(Away from Washington DC) The Honorable (full name) 

United States Senator 

(local address)

Dear Senator (surname) 

Sincerely

Senate Majority (or Minority) Leader 

(Washington DC office) 

The Honorable (full name) 

Majority (or Minority) Leader 

United States Senate 

Washington DC 20510-0001 

Dear Senator (surname) 

Sincerely

(Away from Washington DC) The Honorable (full name) 

Majority (or Minority) Leader 

United States Senate 

(local address)

Dear Senator (surname) 

Sincerely

Senator-elect The Honorable (full name) 

United States Senator-elect 

United States Senate 

Washington DC 20510-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Office of a deceased Senator * (Secretary’s full name, if known) 

Office of the late Senator (full name) 

United States Senate 

Washington DC 20510-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

or Dear Sir 

Sincerely

Speaker of the House of 

Representatives

The Honorable (full name) 

Speaker of the House of Representatives

Washington DC 20510-0001 

Dear * Speaker 

Sincerely

Committee Chairman, 

House of Representatives

The Honorable (full name) 

Chairman, Committee on (name) 

House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-0001 

Dear Mr. Chairman 

 or Madam Chair 

Sincerely

Subcommittee Chairman, 

House of Representatives

The Honorable (full name) 

Chairman, Subcommittee on (name) 

(parent committee) 

House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

or Dear Mr. Chairman 

 or Madam Chair 

Sincerely (when incoming 

 correspondence is so 

 signed and it pertains to 

 subcommittee affairs) 

– 172 –
Personal Letter 

Representative 

(Washington DC office) 

The Honorable (full name) 

House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

(Away from Washington DC) The Honorable (full name) 

(local address)

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

House Majority (or Minority) Leader 

(Washington DC office) 

The Honorable (full name) 

Majority (or Minority) Leader 

House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

(Away from Washington DC) The Honorable (full name) 

(local address)

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Representative-elect The Honorable (full name) 

Representative-elect 

House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Office of a decreased Representative * (secretary’s full name, if known) 

Office of the late (full name) 

House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

or Dear Sir or Madam 

Sincerely

Resident Commissioner The Honorable (full name) 

Resident Commissioner from (area) 

Washington DC 20515-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Delegate of the District of Columbia The Honorable (full name) 

House of Representatives

Washington DC 20515-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Legislative agencies: 

Comptroller General 

(Head of the General Accounting 

Office) 

The Honorable (full name) 

Comptroller General of the United States 

Washington DC 20548-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Public Printer 

(Head of the US Government 

Printing Office) 

The Honorable (full name) 

Public Printer 

US Government Printing Office 

Washington DC 20541-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Librarian of Congress The Honorable (full name) 

Librarian of Congress 

Washington DC 20540-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Executive departments: 

Members of the Cabinet addressed as 

Secretary

The Honorable (full name) 

Secretary of (department) 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * Secretary

Sincerely

Attorney General 

(Head of the Department of Justice) 

The Honorable (full name) 

Attorney General 

Washington DC 20530-0001 

Dear * Attorney General 

Sincerely

Under Secretary of a Department The Honorable (full name) 

Under Secretary of (department) 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Deputy Secretary of a Department The Honorable (full name) 

Deputy Secretary of (department) 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

– 173 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Assistant Secretary of a Department The Honorable (full name) 

Assistant Secretary of (department) 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear (surname) 

Sincerely

Titles for Cabinet Secretaries are: Secretary of State, Secretary of the Treasury, Secretary of Defense, 

Secretary of the Interior, Secretary of Agriculture, Secretary of Commerce, Secretary of Labor, Secretary 

of Education, Secretary of Housing and Urban Development, Secretary of Transportation, Secretary of 

Energy, Secretary of Health and Human Services and Secretary of Veterans Affairs. 

Military departments: 

Address and/or sign off with current rank, not to be promoted rank 

The Secretary The Honorable (full name) 

Secretary of (department) 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * Secretary

Sincerely

Under Secretary of a Department The Honorable (full name) 

Under Secretary of (department) 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * Sincerely

Assistant Secretary of a Department The Honorable (full name) 

Assistant Secretary of (department) 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Military personnel: 

Army, Air Force, and Marine Corps officers:

General of the Army General of the Army (full name) 

(local address)

Dear General (surname) 

Sincerely

General, Lieutenant General, Major 

General, Brigadier General 

(full rank) (full name), (abbreviation of 

 service designation) 

(post office address of organization and 

 station) 

Dear General (surname) 

Sincerely

Colonel, Lieutenant Colonel (full rank) (full name), (abbreviation of 

 service designation) 

(post office address of organization and 

 station) 

Dear Colonel (surname) 

Sincerely

Major, Captain (same as above) Dear (rank) (surname) 

Sincerely

First Lieutenant, Second Lieutenant (same as above) Dear Lieutenant (surname) 

Sincerely

Chief Warrant Officer, Warrant 

Officer 

(same as above) Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Navy officers: 

Fleet Admiral, 

Admiral Vice Admiral,

Rear Admiral, Commodore 

(same as above) Dear Admiral or

 Commodore (surname) 

Sincerely

Captain, Commander, 

Lieutenant Commander 

(same as above) Dear (rank) (surname) 

Sincerely

Lieutenant (same as above) Dear Lieutenant (surname) 

Sincerely

Lieutenant 

(junior grade) 

(same as above) Dear Lieutenant JG 

 (surname) 

Sincerely

– 174 –
Personal Letter 

Ensign (same as previous page) Dear Ensign (surname) 

Sincerely

Chief Warrant Officer (same as previous page) Dear Chief Warrant Officer 

 (surname) 

Sincerely

Academy members: 

Cadet, Midshipman, Air Cadet (rank) (full name) 

(local address)

Dear (rank) (surname) 

Sincerely

Army enlisted personnel: 

Sergeant Major of the Army Sergeant Major (full name) 

(local address)

Dear Sergeant Major 

 (surname) 

Sincerely

Command Sergeant Major, 

Sergeant Major 

(rank) (full name), (abbreviation of service 

 designation) 

(post office address of organization and 

 station) 

Dear Sergeant Major 

 (surname) 

Sincerely

First Sergeant (same as above) Dear First Sergeant 

 (surname) 

Sincerely

Master Sergeant, Platoon Sergeant, 

Sergeant First Class, Staff Sergeant, 

Sergeant 

(same as above) Dear Sergeant (surname) 

Sincerely

Corporal (same as above) Dear Corporal (surname) 

Sincerely

Specialist (all grades) (same as above) Dear Specialist (surname) 

Sincerely

Private First Class, Private (same as above) Dear Private (surname) 

Sincerely

Navy enlisted personnel: 

Master Chief Petty Officer (rank) (full name), (abbreviation of service 

 designation) 

(post office address of organization and 

 station) 

Dear Master Chief 

 Petty Officer (surname) 

Sincerely

Senior Chief Petty Officer, 

Chief Petty Officer 

(same as above) Dear (rank) (surname) 

Sincerely

Petty Officer First Class, Second 

Class, Third Class 

(same as above) Dear Petty Officer 

 (surname) 

Sincerely

Seaman, Seaman Apprentice, 

Seaman Recruit 

(same as above) Dear Seaman (surname) 

Sincerely

Fireman, Fireman Apprentice, 

Fireman Recruit 

(same as above) Dear Fireman (surname) 

Sincerely

Airman, Airman Apprentice, 

Airman Recruit 

(same as above) Dear Airman (surname) 

Sincerely

Construction Man, Construction Man 

Apprentice, Construction Man 

Recruit 

(same as above) Dear Construction 

 Man (surname) 

Sincerely

– 175 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Hospitalman, Hospitalman 

Apprentice, Hospitalman Recruit 

(same as above) Dear Hospitalman 

 (surname) 

Sincerely

Dentalman, Dentalman Apprentice, 

Dentalman Recruit 

(same as above) Dear Dentalman (surname) 

Sincerely

Stewardsman, Stewardsman 

Apprentice, Stewardsman Recruit 

(same as above) Dear Stewardsmand 

 (surname) 

Sincerely

Marine Corps enlisted personnel: 

Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps Sergeant Major (full name) 

(local address)

Dear Sergeant Major 

 (surname) 

Sincerely

Sergeant Major (rank) (full name), (abbreviation of service 

 designation) 

(post office address of organization or 

 station) 

Dear Sergeant Major 

 (surname) 

Sincerely

Master Gunnery Sergeant, 

First Sergeant, Gunnery Sergeant, 

Staff Sergeant, Sergeant 

(same as above) Dear (rank) (surname) 

Sincerely

Corporal, Lance Corporal (same as above) Dear Corporal (surname) 

Sincerely

Private First Class, Private (same as above) Dear Private (surname) 

Sincerely

Air Force enlisted personnel: 

Chief Master Sergeant of the Air 

Force 

Chief Master Sergeant of the Air Force 

 (full name) 

(local address)

Dear Chief (surname) 

Sincerely

Chief Master Sergeant Chief Master Sergeant (full name) 

(local address)

Dear Chief (surname) 

Sincerely

Senior Master Sergeant, Master

Sergeant, Technical Sergeant, Staff 

Sergeant 

(rank) (full name), (abbreviation of service 

 designation) 

(post office address of organization and 

 station) 

Dear Sergeant (surname) 

Sincerely

Senior Airman, Airman First Class, 

Airman, Airman Basic 

(same as above) Dear Airman (surname) 

Sincerely

Retired military personnel: 

All retired military personnel (rank) (full name), (abbreviated service 

 designation), Retired 

(local address)

Dear (rank) (surname) 

Sincerely

Independent agencies: 

Director, Office of Management and 

Budget 

The Honorable (full name) 

Director, Office of Management and Budget 

Washington DC 20503-0001 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Head of Federal Agency Authority or 

Board 

The Honorable (full name) 

(title), (organization) 

(agency)

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

– 176 –
Personal Letter 

Head of a major organization within 

an agency (if the official is appointed 

by the President) 

The Honorable (full name) 

(title), (organization) 

(agency)

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

President of a Commission The Honorable (full name) 

President, (commission) 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Chairman of a Commission The Honorable (full name) 

Chairman, (commission) 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear Madam Chair 

 or Mr. Chairman 

Sincerely

Chairman of a Board The Honorable (full name) 

Chairman, (board) 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear Mr. Chairman 

 or Madam Chair 

Sincerely

Postmaster General The Honorable (full name) 

Postmaster General 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * Postmaster General 

Sincerely

American Mission: 

American Ambassador The Honorable (full name) 

American Ambassador 

(city), (country) 

(local address)

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * Ambassador 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

American Ambassador 

(with military rank) 

(full rank) (full name) 

American Ambassador 

(city), (country) 

(local address)

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * Ambassador or Dear 

 (rank) (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

American Minister The Honorable (full name) 

American Minister 

(city), (country) 

(local address)

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * Minister (informal) 

Sincerely

American Minister 

(with military rank) 

(full rank) (full name) 

American Minister 

(city), (country) 

(local address)

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * Minister (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Foreign government officials: 

Foreign Ambassador in the United 

States

His/Her Excellency (full name) 

Ambassador of (country) 

(local address)

Excellency (formal) 

Dear * Ambassador 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Foreign Minister in the United States The Honorable (full name) 

Minister of (country) 

(local address)

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * Minister (informal) 

Sincerely

– 177 –
Personal Letter 

Foreign Chargé d’Affaires in the 

United States

* (full name) 

Chargé d’Affaires of (country) 

(local address)

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * Chargé d’Affaires

 (informal) 

Sincerely

The Organization of American States: 

Secretary General of the 

Organization of American States

The Honorable (full name) 

Secretary General, the Organization of 

 American States

Pan American Union 

Washington DC 20006-0001 

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * Secretary General 

 or Dear * (Dr.) (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Assistant Secretary General of the 

Organization of American States

The Honorable (full name) 

Assistant Secretary General, the 

 Organization of American States

Pan American Union 

Washington DC 20006-0001 

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * (Dr.) (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

United States Representative on the 

Council of the Organization of 

American States

The Honorable (full name) United States 

Representative on the Council of the 

 Organization of American States

Department of State 

Washington DC (ZIP + 4) 

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * (Dr.) (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

United Nations: 

Communications to the United Nations are addressed to the United States Representative to the United Nations, 

through the Department of State. Exceptions, which are sent direct to the United States Representative, include 

those intended for the Economic and Social Council, the Disarmament Commission, the Trusteeship Council

and the delegation to the General Assembly (when it is in session). Direct communications with the United

Nations is inappropriate unless exceptions arise. Where it is necessary, the communication should be sent to

the Secretary General of the United Nations through the United States Representative by means of a cover 

letter. 

Secretary General of the United 

Nations 

His/Her Excellency (full name) 

Secretary General of the United Nations 

New York NY 10017-3582 

Excellency (formal) 

Dear * Secretary General 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

United States Representative to the 

United Nations 

The Honorable (full name) 

United States Representative to the 

 United Nations 

New York 10017-3582 

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * (surname) (informal) 

Sincerely

Chairman, United States Delegation 

to the United Nations Military Staff 

Committee 

The Honorable (full name) 

Chairman, United States Delegation to the 

 United Nations Military Staff Committee 

New York 10017-3582 

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * (surname) (informal) 

Sincerely

Senior Military Adviser to the United 

States Delegation to the United 

Nations General Assembly

(full rank) (full name) 

Senior Military Adviser 

United States Delegation to the United 

 Nations General Assembly

New York NY 10017-3582 

Dear (rank) (surname) 

Sincerely

United States Representative to the 

Economic and Social Council 

The Honorable (full name) 

United States Representative on the 

 Economic and Social Council of the 

 United Nations 

New York NY 10017-3582 

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * (surname) (informal) 

Sincerely

United States Representative to the 

United Nations Disarmament 

Commission 

The Honorable (full name) 

United States Representative on the 

 Disarmament Commission of the 

 United Nations 

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * (surname) (informal) 

Sincerely

– 178 –
Personal Letter 

New York NY 10017-3582 

United States Representative to the 

Trusteeship Council 

The Honorable (full name) 

United States Representative on the 

 Trusteeship Council 

New York NY 10017-3582 

Sir or Madam (formal) 

Dear * (surname) (informal) 

Sincerely

State and local governments: 

In most states, the lower branch of the legislature is the House of Representatives. In some states, such as 

California and New York, the lower house is known as the Assembly. In others, such as Maryland, Virginia

and West Virginia, it is known as the House of Delegates. Nebraska has a one-house legislature; its members 

are classed as senators. 

Governor of a State The Honorable (full name) 

Governor of (state) 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear Governor (surname) 

Sincerely

Acting Governor of a State The Honorable (full name) 

Acting Governor of (state) 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Lieutenant Governor of a State The Honorable (full name) 

Lieutenant Governor of a State 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * Secretary 

Sincerely

Secretary of State of a State The Honorable (full name) 

Secretary of State of (state) 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * Secretary

Sincerely

Chief Justice of Supreme Court of a 

State 

The Honorable (full name) 

Chief Justice 

Supreme Court of the State of (state) 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * Chief Justice 

Sincerely

Attorney General of a State The Honorable (full name) 

Attorney General 

State of (state) 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * Attorney General 

Sincerely

Treasurer, Comptroller, Auditor of a 

State 

The Honorable (full name) 

State Treasurer 

State of (state) 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

President of the Senate of a State The Honorable (full name) 

President of the Senate of the State of (state) 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

State Senator The Honorable (full name) 

(state) Senate 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Speaker of the House of 

Representatives or the Assembly or 

the House of Delegates of a State 

The Honorable (full name) 

Speaker of the House of Representatives 

 (or Assembly or House of Delegates) 

 of the States of (state) 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

– 179 –
Personal Letter 

State Representative, Assemblyman, 

Delegate 

The Honorable (full name) 

(state) House of Representatives (or 

 Assembly of House of Delegates) 

 (city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Mayor The Honorable (full name) 

Mayor of (city) 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear Mayor (surname) 

Sincerely

President of a Board of 

Commissioners 

The Honorable (full name) 

President, Board of Commissioners of (city) 

(city) (state) (ZIP + 4) 

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Ecclesiastical organizations: 

Protestant Minister, Pastor, Rector 

(with doctoral degree) 

The Reverend (full name) 

(title), (church) 

(local address)

Dear Dr. (surname) 

 or Reverend, Sir or Madam 

 (formal) 

Sincerely

Protestant Minister, Pastor, Rector 

(without doctoral degree) 

The Reverend (full name) 

(title), (church) 

(local address)

Dear * (surname) 

or Reverend, Sir or Madam 

 (formal) 

Sincerely

Rabbi 

(with doctoral degree) 

Rabbi (full name) 

(local address)

Dear Dr. (surname) 

or Dear Rabbi (surname) 

Sincerely

Rabbi 

(without doctoral degree) 

Rabbi (full name) 

(local address)

Dear Rabbi (surname) 

Sincerely

Catholic Cardinal His Eminence (Christian name) 

Cardinal (surname) 

(local address)

Your Eminence (formal) 

Dear Cardinal (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Catholic Archbishop The Most Reverend (full name) 

Archbishop of (province) 

(local address)

Your Excellency (formal) 

Dear Archbishop (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Catholic Bishop The Most Reverend (full name) 

Bishop of (province) 

(local address)

Your Excellency (formal) 

Dear Bishop (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Catholic Monsignor 

(higher rank) 

The Right Reverend Monsignor (full name) 

(local address)

Right Reverend Monsignor 

 (formal) 

Dear Monsignor (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Catholic Monsignor 

(lower rank) 

The Very Reverend Monsignor (full name) 

(local address)

Very Reverend Monsignor 

 (formal) 

Dear Monsignor (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

– 180 –
Personal Letter 

Catholic Priest The Reverend (full name) 

 (add initials of order, if any)

(local address)

Reverend Sir (formal) 

Dear Father (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Catholic Mother Superior of an 

Institution 

Mother (name) (initials of order, if any)

Superior, (institution) 

(local address)

Dear Mother (name) 

Sincerely

Catholic Sister Sister (full name) 

(organization) 

(local address)

Dear Sister (full name) 

Sincerely

Catholic Brother Brother (full name) 

(organization) 

(local address)

Dear Brother (full name) 

Sincerely

Mormon Bishop Mr. (full name) 

Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints 

(local address)

Sir (formal) 

Dear Mr. (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Protestant Episcopal Bishop The Right Reverend (full name) 

Bishop of (name) 

(local address)

Right Reverend Sir (formal) 

Dear Bishop (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Protestant Episcopal Dean The Very Reverend (full name) 

Dean of (church) 

(local address)

Very Reverend Sir (formal) 

Dear Dean (surname) 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Methodist Bishop The Reverend (full name) 

Methodist Bishop 

(local address)

Reverend Sir (formal) 

Reverend Madam 

 (informal) 

Sincerely

Chaplain 

(military service) 

Chaplain (rank) (name) 

(local address)

Dear Chaplain (surname) 

Sincerely

Corporations, companies, and federations: 

A company or corporation (company or corporation) 

(local address)

Mesdames, Gentlemen or 

 Sirs

Sincerely

A federation (name of official) 

(title), (federation) 

(local address)

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Private citizens: 

President of a university or college 

(with doctoral degree) 

Dr. (full name) 

President, (institution) 

(local address)

Dear Dr. (surname) 

Sincerely

President of a university or college 

(without doctoral degree) 

* (full name) 

President, (institution) 

(local address)

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Dean of a school 

(with doctoral degree) 

Dr. (full name) 

Dean, School of (name) 

(institution) 

(local address)

Dear Dr. (surname) 

Sincerely

– 181 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Dean of a school 

(without doctoral degree) 

Professor (full name) 

School of (name) 

(institution) 

(local address)

Dear Professor (surname) 

Sincerely

Professor 

(with doctoral degree) 

Dr. or Professor (full name) 

Department of (name) 

 (institution) 

(local address)

Dear Dr. (surname) 

Dean Professor (surname) 

Sincerely

Professor 

(without doctoral degree) 

Professor (full name) 

Department of (name) 

(institution) 

(local address)

Dear Professor (surname) 

Sincerely

Associate Professor, 

Assistant Professor 

* (full name) 

Associate (or Assistant) Professor 

Department of (name) 

 (institution) 

(local address)

Dear Professor (surname) 

Sincerely

Physician (full name), MD 

(local address)

Dear Dr. (surname) 

Sincerely

Lawyer * (full name) 

Attorney at Law 

(local address)

Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

One individual Mr., Mrs., Miss, or Ms. (full name) 

(local address)

Dear Mr., Miss, Ms. or Mrs.

 (surname) 

Sincerely

Two individuals Mr. and Mrs. (full name) 

Mr. (full name) 

Mrs. (full name) and Miss (full name) 

Mrs. (full name) and Mr. (full name) 

(local address)

Dear Mr. and Mrs.

 (surname) 

Dear Mr. (surname) and 

 Mr. (surname) 

Dear Mrs. (surname) and 

 Miss (surname) 

Dear Mrs. (surname) and 

 Mr. (surname) 

Sincerely

Three or four individuals Messieurs (surnames) 

Mesdames (surnames) 

Misses (full names or given 

 names and surnames) 

or The Misses (surnames) 

(local address)

Gentlemen, Sirs, or

Mesdames or Dear Misses 

 (surnames) 

Sincerely

Former government officials: 

Former President The Honorable (full name) 

(local address)

Dear President (surname) 

Respectfully yours 

Former Vice President (same as above) Dear * (surname) 

Sincerely

Former Member of the Cabinet 

addressed as “Secretary”

(same as above) Dear Mr. (surname) 

Sincerely

Former Attorney General (same as above) Dear Mr. (surname) 

General (surname) 

Sincerely

– 182 –
OFFICIAL 

MEMORANDUM 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE 

AIR UNIVERSITY (AETC) 

24 Nov 04 

MEMORANDUM FOR CATEGORY 1 

FROM: AU/CV 

 55 LeMay 

 Maxwell AFB AL 36112-6335 

SUBJECT: Responsible Use of Electronic Communications (S/S Memo, 10 Nov 04)

1. Access to the Internet provides each person at Air University information sources that rival any 

library. From the comfort of your desk, in about the time it takes you to pour that second cup of 

coffee, your computer can connect you with other computers halfway around the world. You can 

view volumes of text and images, all neatly organized for your convenience. If used correctly, the 

Internet can be an incredibly powerful tool. However, this new capability must be used responsibly. 

The computer and communications lines you use to connect the Internet are government resources. 

Similarly, the information you review or transfer while at work becomes property of the Air Force,

and must serve the purpose of helping you to do your job. You would not consider using the phone 

on your desk for inappropriate and unofficial calls; that same logic applies to your computer and 

accessing Internet. Remember it is an abuse of government resources to use government equipment 

or duty time to conduct unofficial business. 

2. Electronic mail provides an immediate and convenient means of communication. A single 

message can be programmed to send to any number of persons, at any time of the day. Before we hit 

that “Send” button, we should consider where our intended messages may end up. The negative 

repercussion of unintentional distribution was illustrated recently when a pilot involved in the rescue 

of Captain Scott O’Grady in Bosnia sent a full and graphic account of the rescue mission to a 

number of his friends. These friends forwarded the message to others, and soon the entire text of the 

message—including misclassified information—found its way to an electronic bulletin board,

available for anyone to access. This story shows a lack of discretion on the part of the original 

writer, who didn’t consider the sensitive nature of his message or the potential scope of his audience. 

We should learn from his mistakes.

3. Another important point with regard to e-mail, especially when you communicate with outside 

agencies, is that these messages are official correspondence. They reflect your professionalism and 

present an image of Air University. Let’s make certain that image is a positive one. 

 Bill Grant 

BILL GRANT, Colonel, USAF 

Vice Commander 

– 183 –
The Tongue and Quill 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE

HEADQUARTERS UNITED STATES AIR FORCE 

[1.75 inches or 10 lines from top of page] 2 February 2004¶

¶

MEMORANDUM FOR HQ AETC/IM¶ 

 HQ AU/IM¶ 

¶ 

FROM: HQ USAF/SCMV¶ 

 1250 Air Force Pentagon¶

 Washington DC 20330-1250¶

¶ 

SUBJECT: Format of the Air Force Official Memorandum (Your Memo, 15 Jan 03)¶

¶ 

References: (a) AFMAN 33-326, Preparing Official Communications¶

(b) AFH 33-337, The Tongue and Quill¶ 

[One reference is listed in the Subject line; two or more are listed as shown.]¶

¶ 

1. This is a prepared letterhead format of the Air Force official memorandum. The heading will be generic 

consisting of two or three lines: Department of the Air Force, etc., and the organization (Headquarters Air

Combat Command, Headquarters United States Air Force, etc.), and the location with the ZIP code (optional). 

Printed letterhead stationery for wing level is normally used if the quantity needed justifies the printing cost. 

Any unit without its own letterhead may use its parent unit’s and identify its organization and office symbol 

in the FROM caption. Be sure to include the 9-digit ZIP code with the full address in the FROM caption.¶ 

¶

2. The style of writing is yours. For some helpful guidelines see pages 17-24. However, when writing for

someone else’s signature, try to write as though that person were speaking. Be succinct, use active voice and keep 

it short (one page, if possible, see Atch 1). Include extensive background material as an attachment rather than 

within the memorandum itself (see Atch 2).¶

¶

3. Even though most signers want their signatures on a perfect product, minor errors may be neatly corrected in 

ink.¶

¶

4. If you want a response directed to a project officer rather than the signer, include that person’s name and rank 

(if applicable), office symbol, telephone number and e-mail in the body of the memo.¶

¶

¶ 

¶ 

¶ Shirley Collins 

¶ [Start signature block on fifth line] SHIRLEY COLLINS ¶ 

 Management Analyst¶

 Visual Information/Publishing Division¶

 ¶

2 Attachments:¶

1. Minutes, 28 Dec 03¶

2. HQ AF/ILCXE Memo, 15 Dec 03¶ 

 ¶

cc:¶ 

HQ AETC/DP¶ 

1-inch left and right margins 

2-inch top margin and 1-inch bottom

margin

NOTE: Triple space equal 2 blank lines

 Double space equal 1 blank line

– 184 –
Official Memorandum 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE 

UNITED STATES AIR FORCE 

RANDOLPH AIR FORCE BASE

 21 October 2004¶

¶ 

MEMORANDUM FOR ADMINISTRATORS¶ 

¶ 

FROM: ACSC/DEO¶ 

 225 Chennault Circle¶

 Maxwell AFB AL 36112-6426¶

¶ 

SUBJECT: Subdividing Paragraphs in the Official Memo¶

¶ 

1. Introduction paragraph with purpose, statement, and overview.¶

¶ 

2. First main idea.¶ 

¶ 

 a. Fact and reasoning supporting this idea.¶

¶ 

 (1) Fact and reasoning to support a.¶

¶ 

 (2) Additional fact and reasoning to support a.¶

¶ 

 (a) Support for (2).¶

¶ 

 (b) Additional support for (2).¶

¶ 

 1 Support for (b).¶

¶ 

 a Support for 1.¶ 

¶ 

b Additional Support for 1.¶ 

¶ 

 [1] Support for a.¶ 

¶ 

 [2] Additional Support for a.¶ 

¶ 

 2 Additional support for (b).¶

¶ 

 b. Additional fact for reasoning to support 2 (First main idea).¶

¶ 

 (1) Support for b.¶

¶ 

 (2) Additional support for b.¶

¶ 

3. Second main idea.¶

¶ 

 a. Fact and reasoning supporting this idea.¶

¶ 

 b. Etc.¶ 

¶ 

4. Optional closure and point of contact information.¶

¶ 

¶ 

¶

¶ Edward Clinton

¶ [Start signature block on fifth blank line] EDWARD CLINTON, Lt Col, USAF¶ 

 Publishing Editor¶

 

REMEMBER: When subdividing 

paragraphs, never use a 1 without a

2 or an a without a b. 

– 185 –
The Tongue and Quill 

As director of communications, I was asked to prepare a memo reviewing our

company’s training programs and materials. In the body of the memo, one of the

sentences I mentioned the “pedagogical approach” used by one of the training

manuals. The day after I routed the memo to the executive committee, I was called

into the HR director’s office, and told that the executive vice president wanted me

out of the building by lunch. When I asked why, I was told that she couldn’t stand

for “perverts” (pedophilia?) working in her company. Finally, he showed me her

copy of the memo, with her demand that I be fired, and the word “pedagogical”

circled in red. The HR manager was fairly reasonable, and once he looked the word

up in his dictionary and made a copy of the definition to send back to her, he told me

not to worry. He would take care of it. Two days later, a memo to the entire staff

came out, directing us that no words, which could not be found in the local Sunday

newspaper, could be used in company memos. A month later, I resigned. In

accordance with company policy, I created my resignation memo by pasting words

together from the Sunday paper. 

 

– 186 –
 IN TURN 

MEMO 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE 

AIR UNIVERSITY (AETC) 

 19 Feb 04 

MEMORANDUM FOR AU/CC 

 ACSC/CC 

 IN TURN

FROM: AETC/CV 

 1200 Ash Street, Room 123 

 Randolph AFB TX 78236-2550 

SUBJECT: Format of the IN TURN Memo

1. RADEX 2003 was the best conference we have offered. Every detail was planned 

and executed professionally and expertly. Everyone who took part in making the 

conference such a success is to be commended. 

2. Through the support of ACSC, the plans for this event progressed from mere concept 

to reality. Majors Tom Childress and Keith Tonnies and Ms. Carrie Long were especially

helpful in their expert handling of the communications requirements. 

3. On behalf of the Commander, Air Education and Training Command, please 

thank everyone who worked so hard to make the conference a success.

 

 Dean Porter 

DEAN PORTER, JR. 

Major General, USAF 

 Vice Commander

 

– 187 –
The Tongue and Quill 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE 

HEADQUARTERS UNITED STATES AIR FORCE 

WASHINGTON DC 

 [1.75 inches or 10 lines from top of page] 2 January 2004¶

¶ 

MEMORANDUM FOR HQ AETC/PA¶ 

 LG¶ 

 XP¶ 

 IN TURN¶ 

¶ 

FROM: HQ USAF/SCMV¶ 

 1250 Air Force Pentagon¶ 

 Washington DC 20330-1250¶ 

¶ 

SUBJECT: IN TURN Memo Format¶ 

¶ 

1. The IN TURN memo is an official memo addressed to two or more individuals or offices. 

It’s primarily used when you want the final addressee to see the coordination or action of 

the other addressees as the memo moves along the chain.¶ 

¶ 

2. The above address element shows the proper way to address an IN TURN memo within an 

organization. Here’s how to address it to several different organizations.¶ 

¶ 

 MEMORANDUM FOR ACSC/CC¶ 

 AWC/CC¶ 

 SOS/CC¶ 

 AU/CC¶ 

 IN TURN¶ 

¶ 

3. When you receive an IN TURN memo strike through your office symbol, put your initials and 

the date next to your office symbol (shown below) and send the memo on to the next addressee. 

When you have comments, write a note next to your office symbol and either attach your 

comments to the package or send a separate letter directly to the final addressee.¶ 

¶

MEMORANDUM FOR ACSC/DE¶ 

 DS¶ 

 AS¶ 

 IN TURN¶

¶ 

¶ 

¶ 

¶ Brian Magers 

¶ [Start signature block on fifth line] BRIAN MAGERS, Lt Col, USAF¶ 

 Chief of Publishing Policy¶

¶ 

cc:¶ 

 HQ PACAF/DP¶ 

¶ 

 DISTRIBUTION:¶ 

 HQ USAF/SCM¶ 

1-inch left and right margins 

2-inch top margin and 1-inch bottom

margin

NOTE: Triple space equal 2 blank lines 

 Double space equal 1 blank line 

– 188 –
INDORSEMENT 

MEMO 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE

 AIR UNIVERSITY (AETC) 

1 Apr 04

MEMORANDUM FOR ACSC/DEOT 

 THROUGH: MAJOR BOWE

 

 ACSC/DEC 

 THROUGH: MAJOR JONES 

 

 FROM: ACSC/DL 

 

SUBJECT: ACSC Research Internet Homepage Guidelines 

1. All student research teams who want to place a homepage on the Air University 

Internet server must follow the guidelines in the attachment. Before submitting your 

completed homepage to ACSC/DL, ensure you: 

a. Provide a hard copy of your layout and design. Have your research advisor review and 

 approve the homepage. 

 

b. Test your hypertext links to be sure they work correctly.

2. If you have any questions or suggestions on these guidelines, please let me know. My e-mail 

address is robin.jones@maxwell.af.mil.

 Robin Jones ROBIN JONES, Major, USAF 

Chief, Internet Technology

 Attachment: 

Internet Homepage Guidelines 

 cc: 

Lt Col McCann 

1st Ind, ACSC/DEO 5 Apr 04

MEMORANDUM FOR ACSC/DL 

Good guidelines. Please include a reminder that all information must be unclassified.

 Rickey Bowe RICKEY BOWE, Major, USAF 

 Chief, Scheduling

– 189 –
The Tongue and Quill 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE

AIR UNIVERSITY (AETC) 

 [1.75 inches or 10 lines from top of page] 2 November 2004¶

¶ 

MEMORANDUM FOR HQ AU/CFA 

 ATTENTION: MS. SHELLY DIKE

 ¶ 

FROM: ACSC/DEOP 

 ¶ 

SUBJECT: Indorsement Memo Format 

 ¶ 

1. Indorse official memos only, not personal letters. Use within or between US military organizations or 

between US military organizations and civilian organizations under contract with the Air Force. 

 ¶ 

2. Type indorsements on the same page as the original memo or previous indorsement when space is available. 

Begin typing on the left margin two lines below the basic memo or previous indorsement. Number each 

indorsement in sequence (lst Ind, 2d Ind, 3d Ind). Follow the number with your abbreviated functional 

 address symbols.

 ¶ 

 ¶ 

 ¶ 

 ¶ Sharon McBride ¶ [Start signature block on fifth line] SHARON MCBRIDE

The Tongue and Quill OPR¶

 ¶ 

3 Attachments:¶ 

1. AFMAN 33-326, 1 Nov 99 ¶

2. HQ USAF/IM ltr, 28 Aug 04¶

3. AFCA/CC msg, 28 Sep 04¶

 ¶ 

cc: ¶ 

 SAF/AAIQ¶ 

 ¶ 

1st Ind, HQ AU/CFA 8 November 04¶

 ¶ 

MEMORANDUM FOR ACSC/DEOP¶ 

 ¶ 

Use a separate-page indorsement when there isn’t space remaining on the original memorandum or previous 

indorsement. The separate-page indorsement is basically the same as the one for the same page except the top 

line always cites the indorsement number with the office of origin date and subject of the original communication; 

the second line reflects the functional address symbols of the indorsing office with the date. An example is on 

the next page.¶ 

 ¶

 ¶ 

 ¶ 

 ¶ Bart R. Kessler ¶ [Start signature block on fifth line] BART R. KESSLER, Lt Col, USAF¶

Vice Dean of Operations¶ 

 ¶ 

 3 Attachments:¶

1. & 2. nc¶

 3. wd¶

 1-inch left and right margins

2-inch top margin and 1-inch bottom

margin

– 190 –
Indorsement Memo 

– 191 –

NOTE: Tongue and Quill recommends the second and following lines of 

indented text began at the left margin, see example 1a on page 189. 

2 [.5 inches from top of page or 4 blank line]

2d Ind to ACSC/DEOP, 2 Nov 04, Indorsement Memo Format 

ACSC/DEOP 11 December 2004

MEMORANDUM FOR HQ AU/CFA

The first line of the attachment element on indorsements should indicate the total number of attachments 

being forwarded. Succeeding lines should indicate the action regarding all the attachments listed (see previous 

indorsements and attachment listing below).

Sharon McBride 

SHARON MCBRIDE 

The Tongue and Quill OPR

3 Attachments: 

1. & 2. nc 

3. wd 

4. (added) 9 AF ltr, 8 Nov 04
The Tongue and Quill 

Are your memos cut and dry? 

Perhaps you need English that’s alive! 

(See pages 65-89) 

– 192 –
SHORT-NOTE 

REPY 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE

AIR FORCE SPACE COMMAND 

 15 Feb 04 

MEMORANDUM FOR ACSC/DEOP 

 FROM: 1CCS 

 250 South Ramp Road 

 Peterson AFB CO 80914-3050

SUBJECT: Request for The Tongue and Quill

1. I work for the Air Force, slinging ink at paper, pounding a computer, giving

briefings, pushing packages and opening my mouth quite frequently in the conduct of 

today’s mission. I need a personal copy of The Tongue and Quill. 

2. This copy would help tremendously to improve my communications techniques and 

those of the people who work for me. My personal opinion is that everyone who works 

in the Air Force, civilian or military, should have a personal copy of The Tongue and

 Quill. 

Ralph M. Phillips

RALPH M. PHILLIPS

Supervisor, Printing Specialist

 

Memorandum for Mr. Phillips 

Here’s your T&Q~check the 

“Communication Basics” section. 

I couldn’t agree with you more, 

everyone should have their own copy!

Sharon McBride 

Attachment: 

T&Q

 

 

 

– 193 – 
The Tongue and Quill 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE 

HEADQUARTERS PACIFIC AIR FORCES 

 [1.75 inches or 10 lines from top of page] 6 Jan 04¶

¶ 

MEMORANDUM FOR ACSC/DEOP¶ 

¶ 

FROM: HQ PACAF/XP¶ 

 25 East Street STE G214¶ 

 Hickam AFB HI 96853-5417¶ 

¶ 

SUBJECT: The Short-Note Reply Memo Format¶ 

¶ 

Please explain the function and format of the short-note reply. I understand 

it saves time, as well as typing, and can be used to acknowledge, provide a brief 

routine reply, or forward correspondence.¶

¶ 

¶ 

¶ 

¶ Raymond E. Daniels 

¶ [Start signature block on fifth line] RAYMOND E. DANIELS, Lt Col, USAF¶ 

Director of Plans and Administration¶

¶

Memorandum For HQ PACAF/XP¶ 

¶ 

You just explained it! Write (or type) it on the letter if space allows; 

if not, put it on a separate page and attach it. Make a copy for your files.¶ 

¶ 

Sharon McBride¶ 

T&Q OPR¶

 

 1-inch left and right margins 

All too often a penciled question on a staff package 

generates an explosive blast of paperwork. (Rather 

like the commander sneezing and the staff catching

pneumonia!) Why not answer the question with a 

penciled note? Heresy? Hogwash! “Reply in kind” is 

a concept at least as old as powered flight. Remember, 

tearing off the paper tiger is everybody’s business—

from the Chief of Staff down to the lowest ballpoint 

jockey. The short-note reply isn’t always appropriate, 

but it is used much less than it could be. Try it; you’ll 

like it! 

2-inch top margin and 1-inch bottom

margin

NOTE: Triple space equal 2 blank lines 

 Double space equal 1 blank line 

– 194 –
MEMORANDUM 

FOR RECORD 

The separate-page memorandum for record (commonly referred to as memo for 

record, MR or MFR) is used as an in-house document. It records info that is generally 

not recorded in writing (e.g., a phone call or meeting results) and informally passes it to 

others. People working together everyday generally pass info back and forth verbally, 

but sometimes it needs to be recorded and filed—memo for record is perfect. A “MEMO 

FOR RECORD” line can be added to target a specific addressee. 

The explanatory memo for record gives you a quick synopsis of the purpose of the 

memo, tells who got involved and provides additional background info not included in 

the basic memo. By reading both the basic memo and the memo for record, readers 

should understand enough about the subject to coordinate or sign the memo without 

having to call or ask for more info. 

If the basic memo really does say it all, an explanatory memo for record may not be 

needed. However, some organizations require you to acknowledge it by including “MR: 

Self-explanatory.” 

Turn to the next page for memo for record examples. 

 

“A compilation of what outstanding people said

or wrote at the age of 20 would make a 

collection of asinine pronouncements.” 

— Eric Hoffer 

“Eric wrote that when he was 19?” 

— The Quill 

– 195 –
The Tongue and Quill 

MEMO FOR RECORD 2 January 2004 

SUBJECT: Preparing a Separate-Page Memorandum for Record (MR) 

1. Use a separate-page MR to fulfill the functions discussed on the preceding page. 

2. Type or write the MR on a sheet of paper in this format. Use 1-inch margins all

around and number the paragraphs if there is more than one. A full signature block 

is not necessary, but the MR should be signed.

 CAROLYN R. BROWN 

 ASCS/DE

MEMO FOR RECORD 2 Jan 04

Omit the subject when typing the explanatory MR on the record copy. If space 

permits, type the MR and date two lines below the signature block. When there 

isn’t, type “MR ATTACHED” or “MR ON REVERSE” and put the MR on a 

separate sheet or on the back of the record copy if it can be read clearly. 

Number the paragraphs when there is more than one. No signature block is

required; merely sign your last name after the last word of the MR. 

 

MR: When you have a very brief MR and not much space on the bottom of your correspondence, use 

this tighter format. Sign your last name and put the date following the last word. 

 

– 196 –
TRIP 

REPORT

– 197 –
The Tongue and Quill 

DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE 

HEADQUARTERS UNITED STATES AIR FORCE 

 29 January 2004 

MEMORANDUM FOR HQ USAF/SCM

 SC 

 IN TURN 

 FROM: HQ USAF/SCMV 

1250 Air Force Pentagon 

Washington DC 20330-1250 

SUBJECT: The Trip Report Format 

1. PURPOSE: Briefly state the reason for your trip. The report should answer the questions 

who, what, when, where, why, and how much, and then provide recommendations and 

conclusions. Attach meeting minutes or any other background documents that provide 

more detailed information, if needed. The format for the report is not particularly important. 

The official memorandum shown here is a good example; however, if another format better 

suits your needs or your organization has a preferred format, use it.

2. TRAVELER(S): Include rank, first name or initial, and surname. Provide position titles if 

travelers are from different offices or organizations. You may list names of members present

in two columns to save space. 

3. ITINERARY: List location(s) visited, inclusive dates, and key personnel contacted. 

4. DISCUSSION: Base the amount of detailed information you include here on the knowledge 

level of your intended readers. Always include the trip objective, problems encountered, findings, 

future commitments made and your contribution to the event.

5. CONCLUSIONS/RECOMMENDATIONS: Summarize your findings and/or recommended 

 actions. 

 

 Debby Clow 

 DEBBY CLOW

 Committee Member 

Visual Information/Publishing Committee 

 Attachment: 

Minutes, 20 Dec 03 

– 198 –
STAFF STUDY 

REPORT 

 

The staff study report is used to analyze a clearly defined problem, identify conclusions and 

make recommendations. Not all organizations routinely use it, but it is an accepted format for a 

problem-solution report in both Air Force and Joint Staffs. (It’s one of several staff formats 

identified in JFSC Pub 1—The Joint Staff Officer’s Guide.) 

This section provides information on how to analyze a staff problem (“Actions Before Writing 

Your Report”) and guidance on writing a formal staff study (“Writing Your Report”). You may 

never write up a problem-solution in the staff study format. However, if you understand and 

apply the essential elements of problem analysis, you’ll be better prepared for any staff 

communication. The staff study, as a thought process, is far more important than what you call it 

or what precise format you use to communicate your problem-solution explanation—letters, 

estimates of the situation, operational plans and orders, or the staff study report itself. 

“Since the purpose of a staff is to assist the commander in the exercise 

of command, the work of the staff revolves around the solution of 

problems... 

The staff study is one of the more flexible problem-solving procedures 

available to a staff.” 

 — JFSC Pub 1 

– 199 –
The Tongue and Quill 

ACTIONS BEFORE WRITING YOUR REPORT 

Before you can report on a problem, you must mentally solve it. Here’s a logical sequence of 

essential elements: 

1. ANALYZE THE AUDIENCE. You usually solve problems dropped on you by the hierarchy. 

Sometimes you generate your own areas or subjects that call for analysis. In any case, there will 

be political and operational constraints that affect your problem-solving process. Do some

reflective thinking about the “environment” in which you’re operating. 

2. LIMIT THE PROBLEM. Restrict it to manageable size by fixing the who, what, when, why and 

how of the situation. Eliminate unnecessary concerns. Narrow the problem statement to exactly 

what you will be discussing—a common error is a fuzzy or inaccurate problem statement. For 

example, if the problem is the use of amphetamines and barbiturates among junior airmen, the 

problem statement “To reduce the crime rate on base” would be too broad. So would “How to 

detect and limit the use of dangerous drugs on base.” More to the point would be “To detect and 

end the causes of amphetamine and barbiturate use among the junior Airmen at WrightPatterson.” 

The problem should eventually be stated in one of three ways: 

As a question: 

What should we do to detect and end the causes of amphetamine and barbiturate use 

among junior airmen on this base?

As a statement of need or purpose: 

This base needs to develop ways to detect and end the ... 

As an infinitive phrase: 

To detect and end the causes ... 

3. ANALYZE THE WHOLE PROBLEM. Do the parts suggest other problems that need separate 

handling? Or do the parts relate so closely to the whole situation you need only one approach?

4. GATHER DATA. Collect all information pertinent to the problem. (Tips on how and where to 

conduct staff research can be found on Chapter 4). 

5. EVALUATE YOUR INFORMATION. Is the information from reliable witnesses? Is it from

qualified authorities? Does it qualify as solid support? 

“Education should be as gradual as the moonrise, perceptual not in progress but 

in result.” 

— George John Whyte-Melville 

– 200 –
Staff Study Report 

6. ORGANIZE YOUR INFORMATION. One way to organize information is to place it under 

headings titled “Facts,” “Assumptions” and “Criteria.” 

• Facts should be just that, not opinions or assertions. Identify only those facts that directly 

bear on the problem. 

• Assumptions are important because they are always necessary. To reduce a research project 

to manageable size, it is usually necessary to accept certain things as being true, even if you 

are not absolutely sure. The validity of your assumptions usually has a great deal to do with 

the validity of your conclusions. Sometimes desired conclusions can be supported with 

certain unrealistic assumptions. In evaluating research, seek out the assumptions and make 

some judgment as to how reasonable they are. If you feel they are unrealistic, make 

whatever assumptions you feel are correct and try to judge their effect on the conclusions of 

the study. Sometimes a perfectly logical study explodes in your face because your 

assumptions were incredibly weak or simply not supportable. 

• Criteria are those standards, requirements or limitations used to test possible solutions. The 

criteria for a problem-solution are sometimes provided in complete form by your boss when 

you are assigned the problem. Sometimes criteria are inherent in the nature of the obstacle 

causing the problem. The obstacle can only be overcome within certain physical limits, and 

these limits will establish the criteria for the problem-solution. In most cases, however, 

criteria are usually inherent in your own frame of reference and in the goal you are trying to 

attain. This goal and this frame of reference will tolerate only certain problem-solutions, and 

the limits of this tolerance will establish the criteria for the problem-solution. 

Remember this: The criteria will not be very useful if you cannot clearly test the 

possible solutions against them! Since weak or even lousy criteria are often seen in 

problem-solution reports, let’s examine three examples of criteria and assess their value. 

n “The total solution must not cost more than $6,000 annually.” 

o “The solution must result in a 75 percent operationally ready (OR) rate.” 

p “The solution must be consistent with the boss’ philosophy on personnel management.” 

Criterion one is fine; you could easily “bump” your proposed solutions against a specific 

cost. Criterion two looks good on the surface, but OR rates result from numerous and 

complex variables. You probably could not guarantee the decisionmaker your “solution” 

would lead to a 75 percent OR rate. It might improve the OR rate or actually lead to a rate 

higher than 75 percent, but before your boss actually implements your solution, how would 

you know that? If a criterion cannot be used to test solutions before implementation, it is 

not an acceptable criterion. Criterion three isn’t bad, but it’s fuzzy. Perhaps it could be 

written more precisely or left off the formal report altogether. You could still use it 

intuitively to check your solutions, but realize when you use “hidden” criteria, your report 

will be less objective. 

7. LIST POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS. Approach the task of creating solutions with an open mind. 

Develop as many solutions as possible. The “brainstorming” technique using several 

knowledgeable people is a popular approach to generating possible solutions. 

– 201 –
The Tongue and Quill 

8. TEST POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS. Test each solution by using criteria formed while gathering 

data. Weigh one solution against another after testing each. Be sensitive to your personal biases 

and prejudices. Strive for professional objectivity. 

9. SELECT FINAL SOLUTION. Select the best possible solution—or a combination of the best 

solutions—to fit the mission. Most Air Force problem-solutions fall into one of the three 

patterns listed below. Do not try to force your report into one of these patterns if it doesn’t 

appear to fit. 

c Single best possible solution. This one is basic and the most commonly used. You select 

the best solution from several possible ones.

d Combination of possible solutions. You may need to combine two or more possible 

solutions for your best possibilities.

e Single possible solution. At times, you may want to report on only one possible solution.

10. ACT. Jot down the actions required for the final solution. Your comments here will 

eventually lead to the specific action(s) your boss should take to implement the solution (this 

will eventually appear in the “Action Recommended” portion when you write the report). If 

there is no implementing document for the decisionmaker to sign, you need to state clearly what 

other specific action the boss must take to implement your proposal. No military problem is 

complete until action has been planned and executed. 

NOTE: In actual practice, the steps of problem solving do not

always follow a definite and orderly sequence. The steps may

overlap, more than one step may be considered at one time, or 

developments at one step may cause you to reconsider a 

previous step. For example, the data you collect may force 

you to redefine your problem. Similarly, while testing 

solutions, you may think of a new solution or, in the process 

of selecting a final solution, you may discover you need 

additional information. The steps just outlined can serve as a 

checklist to bring order to your mental processes. 

– 202 –
Staff Study Report 

WRITING YOUR REPORT 

Here is the suggested format for a staff study report. Use only those portions of this format 

necessary for your particular report. If you omit certain paragraphs, renumber subsequent 

paragraphs accordingly. 

 DEPARTMENT OF THE AIR FORCE

AIR UNIVERSITY (AETC)

4 February 2004 

 MEMORANDUM FOR 

 FROM: ACSC/DEO 

 225 Chennault Circle 

 Maxwell AFB AL 36112-6426 

SUBJECT: Preparing a Staff Study Report 

 PROBLEM 

1. Clearly and concisely state the problem you are trying to solve. 

FACTORS BEARING ON THE PROBLEM 

2. Facts. Limit your facts to only those directly relating to the problem. 

3. Assumptions. Should be realistic and support your study. 

4. Criteria. Give standards, requirements, or limitations you will use to test possible solutions. 

 Ensure you can use standards to measure or test solutions. 

5. Definitions. Describe or define terms that may confuse your audience. 

 DISCUSSION 

6. This section shows the logic used in solving the problem. Introduce the problem and give some 

background, if necessary. Then explain your solution or possible solution. 

 CONCLUSION 

7. State your conclusion as a workable, complete solution to the problem you described previously in 

 “Discussion.” 

 ACTION RECOMMENDED 

8. Tell the reader the action necessary to implement the solution. This should be worked so the boss 

only needs to sign to make the solution happen. 

 

 David J. Tanthorey 

DAVID J. TANTHOREY, Major, USAF 

 Computer Operations 

 2 Attachments: 

(listed on next page) 

– 203 –
The Tongue and Quill 

By now you probably realize the staff study is a problem-solution report that presents data 

collected, discusses possible solutions to the problem, and indicates the best solution. It is not a 

style to solve a problem. You should mentally solve your problem, and then report the solution 

in writing. The format of the staff study report includes a heading, a body, an ending and, when 

necessary, the attachments.

1. HEADING. Leave after MEMORANDUM FOR blank. This allows the report to seek its 

own level. After FROM, enter your complete office address (see page 184, paragraph 4). After 

SUBJECT, state the report’s subject as briefly and concisely as possible. However, use a few 

extra words if this will add meaning to your subject. 

2. BODY. The body of the report contains five parts: (1) Problem, (2) Factors Bearing on 

the Problem, (3) Discussion, (4) Conclusion, and (5) Action Recommended. These parts 

coincide with the steps of problem solving. That’s why the staff study report is a convenient 

way to report your problem-solution. 

Steps of problem solving Body of staff study 

1. Recognize the problem 1. Problem

2. Gather data 2. Factors Bearing on the Problem

3. List possible solutions 3. Discussion 

4. Test possible solutions 4. Conclusion (a brief restatement 

5. Select final solution of final solution) 

6. Act 5. Action Recommended 

Problem. The statement of the problem tells the reader what you are trying to solve. No 

discussion is necessary at this point; a simple statement of the problem is sufficient. You have 

ample opportunity to discuss all aspects of the problem later in the report. 

Factors Bearing on the Problem. This part contains the facts, assumptions, criteria, and 

definitions you used to build possible solutions to your problem. Devote separate paragraphs to 

facts, assumptions, criteria, and definitions as shown in the sample study report. Obviously, if 

you write a report in which you have no assumptions or definitions, omit either or both. Include 

only those important factors you used to solve your problem. Briefly state whatever you include. 

Put lengthy support material in attachments. Write each sentence completely so you don’t force 

the reader to refer to the attachments to understand what you’ve written. 

Discussion. This part of the report is crucial because it shows the logic used to solve the 

problem. Generally, some background information is necessary to properly introduce your 

problem. The introduction may be one paragraph or several paragraphs, depending on the detail 

required. Once the intro is complete, use one of the following outlines to discuss your thought 

process. 

– 204 –
Staff Study Report 

3⁄43⁄43⁄4When using the single best possible solution:

n List all possible solutions you think will interest the decisionmaker. 

o Show how you tested each possible solution against the criteria, listing both the 

advantages and disadvantages. Use the same criteria to test each possible solution. 

p Show how you weighed each possible solution against the others to select the best possible 

solution. 

q Clearly indicate the best possible solution. 

3⁄43⁄43⁄4When using a combination of possible solutions: 

n List all the possible solutions you think will interest the decisionmaker. 

o Show how you tested each possible solution against the criteria, listing both the 

advantages and disadvantages. Use the same criteria to test each possible solution. 

p Show how you weighed each possible solution against the other possible solutions and 

why you retained certain ones as a partial solution to the problem. 

q Show how and why you combined the retained possible solutions. 

3⁄43⁄43⁄4When using the single possible solution: 

n List your single solution. 

o Test it against the criteria. 

p Show how and why this solution will solve the problem. 

No matter how you organize your report, these points are important: (1) make it brief, (2) 

maintain a sequence of thought throughout, (3) show the reader how you reasoned the problem

through, and (4) use attachments for support, but include enough information in the body of the 

report to make sense without referring to the attachments. 

Conclusion. After showing how you reasoned the problem through, state your conclusion. The 

conclusion must provide a complete, workable solution to the problem. The conclusion is 

nothing more than a brief restatement of the best possible solution or solutions. The conclusion 

must not continue the discussion. It should completely satisfy the requirements of the problem; 

it should never introduce new material. 

Word the recommendations so your boss need only sign for action. Do not recommend 

alternatives. This does not mean you cannot consider alternative solutions in “Discussion.” It 

means you commit yourself to the line of action you judge best. 

You must relieve the decisionmaker of the research and study necessary to decide from several 

alternatives. Give precise guidance on what you want the decisionmaker to do; i.e., “Sign the 

implementing letter at attachment 1.” (Normally, implementing documents should be the first 

attachment.) Don’t submit a rubber turkey. Recommendations like “Recommend further study” 

or “Either solution A or B should be implemented” indicate the decisionmaker picked the wrong 

person to do the study. 

– 205 –
The Tongue and Quill 

3. ENDING. Follow the format shown on the sample report. The ending contains the name, 

rank, and title of the person or persons responsible for the report and a listing of attachments. Do 

not use an identification line. 

4. ATTACHMENTS. Since the body of the staff study report must be brief, relegate as much of 

the detail as possible to the attachments. Although seldom required, identify material needed to 

support an attachment as an appendix to the attachment. 

• Include, as attachments, the directives necessary to support the recommended actions. 

• The body may reference the authority directing the study. An attachment may contain an 

actual copy of the directive. 

• The body may contain an extract or a condensed version of a quotation. An attachment may 

contain a copy of the complete quotation. 

• The body may contain a statement that requires support. An attachment may state the source 

and include the material that verifies that statement. 

• The body may refer to a chart or information in a chart. An attachment may include the 

complete chart. (Design the chart to fit the overall proportions of the report or fold the chart 

to fit these proportions.) 

• If directives or detailed instructions are required to implement the recommended action, 

include the drafts as attachments. 

5. TABS. Number tabs (paper or plastic indicator) to help the reader locate attachments or 

appendices. Affix each tab to a blank sheet of paper and insert immediately preceding the 

attachment. If it is not practical to extract the supporting material from a long or complex 

document used as an attachment, affix the tab to that page within the attachment or appendix 

where the supporting material is located. 

Position the tab for attachment 1 to the lower right corner of a sheet of paper. Position the tab 

for each succeeding attachment slightly higher on a separate sheet so all tabs can be seen. 

– 206 –
Staff Study Report 

COMPLETED STAFF WORK 

A staff study report should represent completed staff work. This means the staff member has 

solved a problem and presented a complete solution to the boss. The solution should be 

complete enough that the decisionmaker has only to approve or disapprove. 

The impulse to ask the chief what to do occurs more often when the problem is difficult. This 

impulse often comes to the inexperienced staff member frustrated over a hard job. It’s easy to 

ask the chief what to do, and it appears easy for the chief to answer, but you should resist the 

urge. Your job is to advise your boss what should be done—provide answers, not questions. Of 

course, it’s okay to inquire at any point in the problem-solving procedure if you need to find out 

whether you are on the right track. This coordination often saves untold hours. 

Some final thoughts on completed staff work and problem-solution reporting: 

1 Completed staff work provides the creative staffer a better chance to get a hearing. Unleash 

your latent creativity! 

1 Schedule time to work the problem. Most problems worthy of analysis require considerable 

study and reflection. 

1 There’s usually no school solution—no “hidden cause” that will jump up and bite your 

kneecap. That’s life. Avoid simplistic solutions; e.g., “Fire the idiots and get on with the 

program.” 

1 Don’t assume that the heavier and fancier the study, the better it is. A smart decisionmaker 

focuses on the relevance and accuracy of your supporting material and the logic of your 

argument. 

1 Don’t work a study in isolation. If you point your finger at someone or some unit, or if the 

solution requires a change in someone’s operation, you’d better get their reaction before you 

drop the bomb. You can look mighty foolish if you find out later they were operating under 

a constraint of which you were unaware. 

1 Remember the final test for completed staff work: If you were the boss, would you be willing 

to stake your professional reputation on this problem-solution report? If the answer is “no, 

go directly to Go. Do not collect $200.” It’s time to start over. 

“No man is fully able to command unless he has first learned to obey.” 

 — Latin Proverb 

– 207 –
The Tongue and Quill 

 

The Latest, Greatest or 

Not So Greatest English 

Audi = good-bye, I’m leaving, I’m out of here: “I’m audi.” 

Baldwin = attractive guy, a male Betty 

Barney = unattractive guy, not a Baldwin 

Betty = beautiful woman 

Big time = totally, very 

Buggin’ = irritated, perturbed, flipping out: “I’m bugging” 

Clueless = lost, stupid, mental state of people who are not 

yet your friends, uncool 

Furiously = very, extremely, majorly 

Hang = get tight with, ally with 

I’m all ... = I was saying such things as “He’s all ‘Where were you?’” and 

“I’m all ‘What’s it your business?’” 

Majorly = very, totally, furiously 

Monet = looks fine from a distance but a mess up close, 

not a babe, really 

Monster = much too big and loud, very good 

Postal = a state of irritation, psychotic anger and disorientation 

TB = true blue, loyal, faithful 

Toast = in trouble, doomed, exhausted, towed up, history 

Tow up = tore up, in bad condition, trashed, toast 

Wass up? = see “zup” 

Wig, wigged or wiggin’ = become irritated, freak out, go postal 

Zup? = Question: Is anything new? What’s up 

 -from the film Clueless 

– 208 –
TALKING 

PAPER 

TALKING PAPER 

ON 

USE OF COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL 

- A copyright is the exclusive right granted under Title 17, United States Code, to the 

 owner of an original work to reproduce and to distribute copies, to make derivative 

 works, and to perform or display certain types of the works publicly. 

- Use of copyrighted material in works prepared by or for the Air Force is governed 

 by AFI 51-303, Intellectual Property - Patents, Patent Related Matters, Trademarks and 

 Copyrights. 

-- No Air Force personnel should incorporate copyrighted material into works 

 prepared by or for the Air Force to an extent that would clearly infringe a 

 copyright without the written permission of the copyright owner. 

-- Each Air Force activity may seek permission in the form of a license or release 

 to make limited use of copyrighted material without charge. The request should:

--- Be for no greater rights than are actually needed. 

--- Identify fully the material for which permission to use is requested. 

--- Explain the proposed use and state conditions of use, so that the copyright 

 proprietor or agent need only give affirmative consent of the proposed use. 

--- Be submitted in two copies to the copyright proprietor so that the 

 proprietor may retain one copy and return the other copy after it is signed. 

--- Include a self-addressed return envelope. 

- The Judge Advocate General controls and coordinates all copyright activities 

 of the Air Force. 

-- The patents division directs those activities within The Judge Advocate General. 

-- Forward a copy of each license or release or any permission obtained without 

 charge to the patents division. 

Capt Jones/CPD/JA/3-3426/ada/30 Aug 04 

 

– 209 –
The Tongue and Quill 

TALKING PAPER 

 ¶ 

ON 

 ¶ 

WRITING TALKING AND POINT PAPERS 

 ¶ 

 ¶ 

- Talking paper: quick-reference outline on key points, facts, positions, questions 

 to use during oral presentations 

 ¶ 

- Point paper: memory tickler or quick-reference outline to use during meetings 

 or to informally pass information quickly to another person or office 

 ¶ 

-- No standard format; this illustrates space-saving format by eliminating headings 

 (PURPOSE, DISCUSSION, RECOMMENDATION) 

 ¶ 

-- Usually formatted to conform to user’s desires 

 ¶ 

--- Both papers assume reader has knowledge of subject 

 ¶ 

--- Prepare separate talker for each subject 

 ¶ 

-- Prepared in short statements; telegraphic wording 

 ¶ 

-- Center title (all cpital letters). Use 1-inch margin all around 

 ¶ 

--- Single dashes before major thoughts; multiple dashes for subordinate 

 thoughts 

 ¶ 

--- Single space each item; double space between items

 ¶ 

-- Use open punctuation; ending punctuation not required 

 ¶ 

-- Avoid lengthy details or chronologies, limiting to one page when possible 

 ¶ 

-- See DoD 5200.1-R/AFI 31-401 to prepare classified papers 

 ¶ 

-- Include writer’s identification line as shown below on first page only if 

 multiple pages 

 ¶ 

- Include recommendations, if any, as last item 

 ¶ 

- Include supporting information in an FYI (for your information) note in parenthesis 

at the appropriate place in the text or in attached background paper. EXAMPLE: 

(FYI: This is an FYI note. END FYI) 

Ms. Adams/ACSC/DEC/3-5043/lcm/7 Apr 04 

1-inch left and right margins 

NOTE: Triple space equal 2 blank lines 

 Double space equal 1 blank line 

1-inch top and bottom

margins

– 210 –
BULLET 

BACKGROUND 

PAPER 

BULLET BACKGROUND PAPER 

ON 

BULLET STATEMENTS 

PURPOSE 

The Bullet Background Paper is an excellent tool designed to present concisely written statements 

 centered around a single idea or to present a collection of accomplishments with their respective impacts. 

DISCUSSION 

- All bullet statements must be accurate, brief and specific (ABS) 

- Types of bullet statements 

-- Single Idea Bullets 

 --- Definition: A concise written statement of a single idea or concept 

 --- Cannot delineate 

 --- Must serve purpose 

 -- Accomplishment-Impact Bullets 

 --- Definition: A concise written statement of a person’s single accomplishment 

 and its impact on the unit mission, organization, etc.

 --- Must clearly state a single accomplishment 

 --- Must have an impact 

---- Impact can be implied (Specific Achievement) or expressly stated

---- Strive to relate impact to the unit mission, organization, etc. 

---- Make impact clear to those not familiar with career field, unique 

 terminology, jargon, etc.

---- Expressly stated impact should strengthen bullet statement 

---- Expressly stated impact should put accomplishment into perspective 

 --- Accomplishment element must always precede impact element 

 --- Types of Accomplishment-Impact Bullets 

---- Action Verb: Accomplishment begins with strong, descriptive action verb 

---- Modified Verb: Accomplishment begins with modifier (typically adverb) 

---- Specific Achievement: Impact is implied, not expressly stated

SUMMARY 

This paper summarizes characteristics of Single Idea and Accomplishment-Impact bullet statements. 

MSgt McCarty/CEPME/EDC/6-4309/dcm/18 Aug 04

– 211 –
The Tongue and Quill 

BULLET BACKGROUND PAPER 

 ¶ 

1-inch top and bottom

margins -inch top and bottommargins

ON 

 ¶ 

THE BULLET BACKGROUND PAPER 

 ¶ 

 ¶ 

 An increasingly popular version of the background paper is the “bullet” background paper. The bullet 

 format provides a concise, chronological evolution of a problem, a complete summary of an attached 

 staff package or a more detailed explanation of what appears in an attached talking paper. 

 Use the first paragraph to identify the main thrust of the paper. 

 Main ideas follow the intro paragraph and may be as long as several sentences or as short as one word 

 (such as “Advantages”). 

 - Secondary items follow with a single dash and tertiary items follow with multiple indented dashes. 

 Secondary and tertiary items can be as short as a word or as long as several sentences. 

 - Format varies. 

 -- Center title (all capital letters); use 1-inch margins all around; single space the text; double space 

 between items—except double space title and triple space to text; use appropriate punctuation in 

 paragraphs and complete thoughts. 

 -- Headings such as SUBJECT, PROBLEM, BACKGROUND, DISCUSSION, 

 CONCLUSION, or RECOMMENDATION are optional. 

 Keys to developing a good backgrounder: 

 - Write the paper according to the knowledge level of the user; i.e., a person who is very knowledgeable on 

 the subject won’t require as much detail as one who knows very little. 

 - Emphasize main points.

 - Attach additional support data; refer to it in the backgrounder. 

 - Require minimum length to achieve brevity with short transitions. 

 - End with concluding remarks or recommendations. 

 Include an identification line (author’s rank and name, organization, office symbol, phone number, 

 typist’s initials, and date) on the first page 1 inch from the bottom of the page. 

 

Mrs. Wilson/ACSC/CCA/3-2295/cab/7 Apr 03 

REMEMBER: When subordinating bullets never 

use a double-dash (--) without a single dash (-), or 

a triple-dash (---) without a double-dash (--), etc. 

 - Main bullet 

 -- Secondary bullet 

 --- Tertiary bullet 

 --- Tertiary bullet 

 -- Secondary bullet 

- Main bullet 

NOTE: Triple space equal 2 blank lines 

 Double space equal 1 blank line 

1-inch left and right margins 

– 212 –
Bullet Background Paper 

TYPES OF BULLET STATEMENTS 

1. Single Idea Bullets ~ This type of bullet is typically used for Talking Papers, Point Papers 

and Bullet Background Papers. Various examples can be found on the sample BBPs and in 

the Display Dot punctuation guidelines on pages 289-290. 

2. Accomplishment-Impact Bullets ∼ This type of bullet is typically used in performance 

reports (EPR, OPR, etc.), recommendations, and award submissions (Air Force IMT 1206). 

These bullets typically describe someone’s work performance (good or bad) and/or 

noteworthy off-duty pursuits. For further help on how to develop accomplishment-impact 

bullet statements, see pages 226-235. 

• The Accomplishment Element: This portion briefly describes the person’s actions or 

behavior. Keep the following questions in mind as you construct the accomplishment 

element of your bullet statement: 

- What did the person (or group) do?

- What was the success (or, less often, the failure)? 

- Might some terms be unfamiliar to readers outside this career field?

• The Impact Element: The impact element describes the results of the accomplishment 

and it may be either expressly stated or implied. The impact element is vital to describing 

the relative importance of the action. Keep the following questions in mind as you 

construct the impact element of your bullet statement: 

- What is the impact on the mission of the organization or the Air Force?

- Is this impact statement accurate in scope and strength?

- Does it put things into perspective?

There are three variations of the accomplishment-impact bullet. In most performance related 

documents (i.e., performance reports, award submissions, etc.), the Action Verb and Modified 

Verb variations are predominantly used, whereas the Specific Achievement variation is used 

sparingly. 

• Action Verb: The accomplishment element begins with a strong action verb and ends 

with an expressly stated impact element. 

- Developed new customer sign-in log reducing customer complaints by 35 percent

- Implemented a schedule to pick up customer equipment items; reduced delays by 5 days

- Conducted 10 staff assistance visits this year 

 -- Ensured all units received an EXCELLENT rating on their IG inspections 

 -- Selected two units for Air Force-wide recognition 

• Modified Verb: The accomplishment element begins with a modifier in front of the 

action verb and ends with an expressly stated impact element.

- Consistently exceeded all standards of ... [Consistently modifies the verb exceeded] 

- Solely responsible for production increases in ... [Solely modifies the verb responsible]

• Specific Achievement: The accomplishment element may begin with a noun, verb or 

modifier; the impact of the accomplishment is implied. Specific Achievement bullets are 

primarily used to describe professional development or personal attainment.

- Wing NCO of the Quarter for Jul-Sep 2004 

- CCAF degree in Aeronautical Systems Technology

- Tirelessly maintained 4.0 GPA towards Bachelor’s degree in Civil Engineering

– 213 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Spell Chequer

Eye halve a spelling chequer 

It came with my pea sea 

It plainly marques four my revue 

Miss Steaks eye kin knot sea. 

Eye strike a key and type a word 

And weight four it two say 

Weather eye am wrong oar write 

It shows me strait a weigh. 

As soon as a mist ache is maid 

It nose bee fore two long 

And eye can put the error rite 

Its rarely ever wrong. 

Eye have run this poem threw it 

I am shore your pleased two no. 

Its letter perfect in it's weigh 

My chequer tolled me sew. 

– Sauce Unknown

– 214 –
BACKGROUND 

PAPER 

BACKGROUND PAPER 

ON 

JOINT COMMUNICATIONS PLANNING AND MANAGEMENT 

1. Joint Communications Planning and Management System (JCPMS) is an open-system, UNIXbased, automated communications network planning and management tool. It gives all the services 

and commanders in chief an automated capability to plan and manage a joint task force 

 communications network. The requirement for a JCPMS capability comes from a requirement 

submitted by the United States Atlantic Command. The Joint Staff and the JCS Publication 6-05 

working group validated the requirement and rewrote it into a joint mission needs statement. The 

Defense Information Systems Agency (DISA) evaluated the services’ current and under development 

communications management programs to determine suitability for the joint requirement. 

DISA selected the Army’s Integrated Systems Control (ISYSCON) as the best candidate to be 

 developed into a JCPMS.

2. Joint Staff failed to obtain funding from The Office of the Secretary of Defense. The Joint Staff 

requested the Air Force, Army and Navy share equally in the cost to develop JCPMS from ISYSCON. 

The services attempted to write an input to the Program Object Memorandum for this requirement, 

but the initiative fell short within each service. 

3. JCPMS will be based on commercial off-the-shelf (COTS) and government off-the-shelf (GOTS) 

software. This is prudent, cost-effective, timely, and in-line with COTS network management and 

control products already planned for other Air Force and DoD programs (e.g., theater deployable 

communications equipment, Base Network Control Center System and Defense Message System). A 

 COTS/GOTS-based implementation of JCPMS will ease compatibility and interoperability issues 

likely to arise when the different network management systems are ultimately tied together. 

4. The Air Force supports a joint solution that functions as a “manager of managers” to unite both 

strategic and deployable individual equipment managers in a seamless fashion. This will ease 

compatibility and/or interoperability issues likely to arise when the different network management 

systems are ultimately tied together. The Air Force agrees a JCPMS is needed and supports adapting 

 a COTS-based ISYSCON to meet JCPMS requirements with the understanding the Air Force has no 

additional funding to contribute toward this effort. 

Maj Don Duckett/ACSC/PI/6-5585/fv/28 Feb 04

– 215 –
The Tongue and Quill 

BACKGROUND PAPER 

¶ 

ON 

¶ 

BACKGROUND PAPERS 

¶ 

¶ 

1. The background paper is a multipurpose staff communications instrument that transmits ideas or 

concepts from one agency or person to another. It is an excellent way to express ideas on specific 

topics and to describe conditions that require a particular staff action. This background paper outlines 

its basic function and format with concluding comments covering the style and length. 

2. The most common function of the background paper is to present the background (chronological, 

problem-solution, etc.) underlying an issue or subject, but it also has other purposes. One command uses 

it to condense and summarize important or complex matters into a single, easily read document limited 

to three pages. Another command uses it to inform and prepare senior officers to talk on a subject. Still 

another command specifies it as a summary of background material to provide a speaker with historical, 

technical, or statistical data. 

3. A good background paper contains a brief introductory paragraph that provides the reader with a clear 

statement of purpose and an outline or “road map” for the paper, the basic discussion that comprises the 

bulk of the paper (cohesive, single-idea paragraphs), and leads the reader logically to the conclusion. 

Generally, write in the third person, although writing in first person, active voice will sometimes be more 

appropriate. The concise, telegraphic style of the talking paper is sometimes used and is encouraged. The 

bullet background paper shown next illustrates a tighter format. If it will do the job, use it. 

4. The specific format (including style and length) of the background paper also varies. It may be longer 

than one page; the main point is to make it as short or as long as necessary to cover the topic adequately. 

Some agencies specify no particular format. The bullet format and this one illustrate the formats used in 

most organizations. General guidelines follow: 

a. Begin the header “BACKGROUND PAPER” six lines (1 inch) from the top of the first page and 

three lines above text. 

b. Use a 1-inch margin all around, double space. 

c. Type an identification line (originator’s rank and name, organization, office symbol, phone number, 

typist’s initials, and date) on the first page 1 inch from the bottom of the page. 

d. Number the pages consecutively, starting with page 2. Enter the page number on the left margin 

1 inch from the bottom of the page or at least two lines below the last line of the text. 

5. The key to an effective background paper, like any well-written document, is to get to the point quickly, 

cover all aspects of the issue in sufficient detail to meet your objective, and close the paper with a sense of 

 finality. 

 

MSgt Reed/ACSC/DPS/3-2620/jk/1 Oct 04 

1-inch left and right margins 

NOTE: Triple space equal 2 blank lines 

 Double space equal 1 blank line 

1-inch top and bottom

margins

– 216 –
POSITION 

PAPER 

POSITION PAPER 

ON 

QUALITY AIR FORCE 

1. This paper addresses the importance of embracing and implementing Quality Air 

Force (QAF) tools into the Air Force. QAF tools are proven management techniques 

that allow better decision analysis and decision-making, but many do not recognize their 

usefulness. Several of the tools are based on supported measurement (metrics) and, like 

tools in a master carpenter’s toolbox, they work well when properly used. 

2. Traditionally, we have been taught to depend on our leader to analyze and solve 

problems. Based on the leader’s experience and “analysis,” many of those decisions were 

excellent, but not all. Today, we can better analyze problems using a quality tool called 

a flow chart. This tool asks people involved in, and thoroughly aware of, a process to 

examine and display the process steps so it can be analyzed and improvements can be made. 

This allows a logical and more “fact-based” improvement decision. Still, people say the 

process takes too long, it is unwieldy, and they aren’t comfortable with it. So all the 

“improvement” decisions are made without it.

3. We must use QAF tools better. We have all bent a nail using a hammer, but how many 

of us blame the hammer? The same philosophy applies to quality tools. If we apply them 

 properly, they work. We can certainly use a wrong tool to solve a problem. (We’ve all 

 hammered in a nail with something other than a hammer with mixed results—QAF tools 

 are the same.) But consider the master carpenters; they not only know and use tools more 

 effectively they also add unique tools of their own. If we can add more “quality” tools to 

 our toolkits, we must. 

4. Using QAF tools in this time of dramatic, fast-paced change makes a lot of sense. If you 

haven’t tried using them, do it. If you have tried once and a tool didn’t work, think of all the 

nails you bent with a perfectly good hammer. The tools are proven performers, but we must 

use them and use them properly.

Lt Col Miles/ACSC/DE/3-7070/ly/14 Mar 04

 

– 217 –
The Tongue and Quill 

POSITION PAPER 

¶ 

ON 

¶ 

THE POSITION PAPER 

¶ 

¶ 

1. When you must evaluate a proposal, raise a new idea for consideration, advocate a 

current situation or proposal, or “take a stand” on an issue, you’ll find the position paper 

format ideally suited for the task. This position paper builds a case for that assertion by

describing the function and format of the Air Force position paper. 

2. The opening statement or introductory paragraph must contain a “clear statement” of 

your purpose in presenting the issue and “your position” on that issue. The remainder of 

the paper should consist of integrated paragraphs or statements that logically support or 

defend that position. Adequate, accurate and relevant support material is a must for the 

position paper. 

3. Since a position paper is comparable to an advocacy briefing in written format, the 

concluding paragraph must contain a specific recommendation or a clear restatement of 

your position. This is where you reemphasize your bottom line. 

4. The format for the position paper is the same as for the background paper—number the 

 paragraphs and double space the text. For more specifics, refer to the background paper 

 on pages 215-216. 

Capt Suarez/ACSC/DPS/3-7911/yb/2 Mar 04 

1-inch left and right margins

NOTE: Triple space equal 2 blank line 

 Double space equal 1 blank line 

1-inch top an

d

bottom

margins

– 218 –
STAFF 

SUMMARY SHEET 

AF FORM 1768, 19840901 (IMT-V1) PREVIOUS EDITION WILL BE USED

STAFF SUMMARY SHEET 

TO ACTION SIGNATURE (SURNAME), GRADE AND 

DATE 

TO ACTION SIGNATURE (SURNAME),

GRADE AND DATE

1 AU/ES Coord Cooper, Lt Col, 6 Apr 04 6 

2 AU/CV Coord

Wright, Col, 6 Apr 04 

7 

3 AU/CC Sig

Woods, Col, 6 Apr 04

8 

4 9 

5 10 

SURNAME OF ACTION OFFICER AND GRADE 

Major Robinson

SYMBOL 

ACSC/CCE

PHONE 

3-2224

TYPIST’S 

INITIALS

gst

SUSPENSE DATE 

SUBJECT 

Proposed Letter of Invitation to General Colin Powell, USA, Retired

DATE 

2 Apr 04

SUMMARY 

1. The proposed letter at Tab 1 invites General Powell to be the guest speaker at Air Command and Staff College’s

(ACSC) graduation on 12 Jun 04. This year, ACSC has added emphasis on leadership throughout the curriculum. 

General Powell’s presentation will provide the capstone to the school’s Leadership Focus guest speaker series. 

2. RECOMMENDATION. CC sign proposed letter at Tab 1. 

Michael E. Harris 

MICHAEL E. HARRIS, Colonel, USAF 1 Tab 

Dean of Distance Learning, ACSC Proposed Invitation Ltr 

Ext 3-2456 

SAMPLE 

– 219 –
The Tongue and Quill 

– 220 –

STAFF SUMMARY SHEET 

TO ACTION SIGNATURE (SURNAME), GRADE AND 

DATE 

TO ACTION SIGNATURE (SURNAME), GRADE AND 

DATE 

1 ACSC/DEO Coord Herron, Lt Col, 5 Apr 04 6 

2 ACSC/DE Coord Graham, Dr., 6 Apr 04 7 

3 

ACSC/CV Coord German, Col, 6 Apr 04 8 

4 

ACSC/CC Sig Ladnier, Brig Gen, 7 Apr 04 9 

5 10 

Sign your surname, rank or grade, 

and date on the bottom line if you

are the addressee; sign on the top 

line if you aren’t the addressee. If 

more than 10 coordinators, use 

another form, renumber and fill in

all info through Subject line. 

SURNAME OF ACTION OFFICER AND 

GRADE 

SMSgt Tyndale 

SYMBOL 

DPS 

PHONE 

3-2290 

TYPIST’S 

INITIALS

jv 

SUSPENSE DATE 

11 Apr 04

SUBJECT 

Preparing the Staff Summary Sheet (SSS)

DATE 

1 Apr 04 

SUMMARY 

1. The SSS introduces, summarizes, coordinates, or obtains approval or signature on a staff package. It should be a concise 

(preferably one page) summary of the package. It states the purpose, pertinent background information, rationale, and discussion

necessary to justify the action desired. Show the action desired (Coord [Coordination], Appr [Approval], Sig [Signature]). Use 

Info (Information), when the SSS is submitted for information only. (NOTE: Usually show only one Appr entry and one Sig

entry.) Use complete address when coordinating with outside organizations. 

2. The SSS is attached to the front of the correspondence package. If an additional page is necessary, prepare it on plain bond

paper. Use the same margins you see here. Summarize complicated or lengthy correspondence or document attached, or any 

appropriate portion of any document you reference. Do not use in place of a memo; use with a package it summarizes. 

3. List attachments to the SSS as tabs. List the documents for action as Tab 1. List incoming letter, directive or other paper—if 

any—that prompted you to prepare the SSS as Tab 2. (If you have more than one document for action, list and tab with as many

numbers as needed and list the material you’re responding to as the next number: Tabs 1, 2, and 3 for signature, Tab 4 incoming 

document.) List supplemental documents as additional tabs followed by the record or coordination copy and information copies. 

If nonconcurrence is involved, list it and the letter or rebuttal as the last tab.

4. VIEW OF OTHER. Explain concerns of others external to the staff (i.e., OSD, Army, Navy, State, etc.) For example: “OSD 

may disapprove of the approach.” Use a period or colon after VIEW OF OTHER, OPTION, etc. Either is acceptable; just be 

consistent. 

5. OPTIONS. If there are significant alternative solutions, explain. For example, “Buying off-the-shelf hardware will reduce the 

cost by 25 percent, but will meet only 80 percent of the requirements.” 

6. RECOMMENDATION. Use this caption when SSS is routed for action. State the recommendation, including action necessary 

to implement it, in such a way the official need only sign an attachment or coordinate, approve, or disapprove the recommended 

action. Do not recommend alternatives or use this caption when submitted for info only. 

Carrie H. Long 

CARRIE H. LONG 2 Tabs 

Student Services, ACSC 1. Proposed Ltr

Ext 3-7901 2. HQ AETC/CC Ltr, 25 Mar 04 w/1 Atch

AF FORM 1768, 19840901 (IMT-V1) PREVIOUS EDITION WILL BE USED 
Staff Summary Sheet 

 – 221 –

ARRANGING ATTACHMENTS TO AF FORM 1768 

FORMAT TO INDICATE TABS 

Tab 3, 4, 5, 6, to staff

summary sheet 

Tab 2

Atch 2

Incoming 

Documents

Tab 3 

Tab 2 

Atch 2

Atch 1

Sample of 3 assembled tabs 

and attachments 

Atch 1

Tab 1 outstanding 

correspondence

Tab 1 

AF FORM 

1768

Tab 1 

Attachments 1 and 2 

to outgoing 

correspondence

AF FORM 

1768

Information copies.

Record copy. (Show internal coordination.)

Background: Any supplemental documents.

Incoming document(s): Any items prompting preparation of document.

Include addressed envelope, if required.

Courtesy copy of document.

Attachment(s) to document routed for signature, approval or information.

AF Form 1768 

Outgoing material: Original of document routed for signature, approval or information.

Tab 1 to staff

summary sheet 

Tab 2 to staff summary

sheet 
The Tongue and Quill 

– 222 –

PREPARATION OF AN ELECTRONIC STAFF SUMMARY SHEET (SSS) 

Staff Summary Sheets requiring your Group or Wing Commander’s signature should be sent through your 

internal channels via e-mail. Office of Primary Responsibility (OPR) transmits package via e-mail to first 

reviewer to coordinate/comment. The first reviewer should forward (never reply) package with comments (if 

any) to the next reviewer. This procedure is repeated until last reviewer has coordinated on the package. 

The last reviewer forwards the entire package back to the OPR. 

E-mail Message 

From: 

Sent: 

To: 42 SPTG/CCE 

Cc: 

Subject: Electronic Staff Summary (ESS) Format 

--------------------------------- 

COORDINATION 

Office Action Last Name/Rank/Date

AU/ES Coord Humphries, GS-11, 11 Sep 03 

AU/DSS Review Gordon, GS-07, 11 Sep 03 

AU/DS Coord Phillips, Col, 12 Sep 03 

AU/CV Coord Copy provided/mal 

AU/CCS Review/Print Thomas, GS-09, 13 Sep 03 

AU/CCE Review Tonnies, Maj, 16 Sep 03 

AU/CC Sign [AU/CC signed. To CC Secretary for mailing. Prh] 

42 CS/SCB Info/File Smith, GS-11, 16 Sep 03 

*Note: Options for Action are Sign, Coord, Appr, Review, Info, or File 

------------------------------------------------------STAFF SUMMARY 

AO: Mr. John J. Smith, GS-11, 42 CS/SCB, 3-3467 

SUPENSE: N/A

Summary: (If applicable) 

1. PURPOSE. Please FORWARD (never REPLY) to the next agency after coordination. (If you require 

that the package be forwarded back to the originator for closer tracking, then so state.) The only attachment 

should be the actual letter for signature, or any extremely lengthy document, nothing else. All pertinent 

information should be included in this section. The reader should not have to look anywhere else for an 

explanation of the package’s contents. 

2. DISCUSSION. State the reason for the needed signature/coordination and any pertinent information 

needed to inform them why they are receiving the package. Include all information in the E-mail itself (i.e., 

tabs, talking papers, etc.). 
Staff Summary Sheet 

 – 223 –

3. RECOMMENDATION. In this section include the document you need signed (attachment) or action 

required. State whether you require an electronic or original signature in this section. 

//Signed/mal/30 Sep 03// 

MARTHA A. LONG 

Lieutenant Colonel, USAF 

Commander, 42d Communications Squadron 

Ext 3-4289 

Tab: 

Example Electronic Staff Summary (ESS) Format 

---------------------------------------------------Tab – ESS Format 

ESS Format.DOC (attach document here) 
The Tongue and Quill 

– 224 –

RULES FOR WRITERS: 

" Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.

" Prepositions are not words to end sentences with. 

" And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.

" It is wrong to ever split an infinitive. 

" Avoid clichés like the plague. (They’re old hat.)

" Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.

" Be more or less specific. 

" Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.

" Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies. 

" No sentence fragments. 

" Foreign words and phrases are not apropos. 

" Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous. 

" One should NEVER generalize. 

" Comparisons are as bad as clichés. 

" Don't use no double negatives. 

" Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc. 

" One-word sentences? Eliminate. 
PERFORMANCE 

REPORT

Officer Performance Reports (OPR), Enlisted Performance Reports (EPR), and civilian reports 

(appraisals), are used by commanders, managers and supervisors to document an individual’s 

performance over a specific period of time, and to identify top performers. As a supervisor, you 

play a vital role in your employee’s career. You are the single most important person in a 

dynamic process that, through mentoring and effective writing, ensures each individual is 

afforded the opportunity for success and increased responsibility. 

Performance reports provide a permanent, long-term record of an individual’s performance and 

potential based on their performance. Performance reports should follow appropriate 

instructions/regulations and command guidance, if required. For more information, consult 

writing guides that support your organization’s needs. 

“My guidelines are simple. Be selective. Be concise, don’t 

tell someone what you know; tell them what they need to 

know, what it means, and why it matters.” 

 — General David C. Jones 

– 225 –
The Tongue and Quill 

GETTING STARTED 

1 GETTING ORGANIZED. Keep records of all employee’s accomplishments, awards and 

recommendations. 

2 FORMAT. Refer to bullet format on page 213 and 226-235 for writing style. Use the font 

specified by your organization—in most cases it’s built into the software used to produce the 

report. Limit each statement to three lines in length. 

3 EDITING PRACTICES. Use the Mechanics of Writing section for grammatical terms, 

punctuation, abbreviations, capitalization, hyphens, and numbers. Avoid misspellings, typos, 

badly smudged documents, and misaligned bullet statements, which make a poor impression. 

4 WRITE EFFECTIVELY. Get the reader’s attention. Positive words and phrases leave a 

lasting impression with readers, so check out the word list on pages 228-229. Neutral or 

negative words and phrases give the impression that the person you are writing about is average 

or below average. The heart of effective writing in a performance report involves writing 

effective accomplishment-impact statements. 

WRITING ACCOMPLISHMENT-IMPACT BULLET STATEMENTS 

Like many Air Force writers, you’ve likely stared down the barrel of a loaded bullet statement 

tasking and wondered, “How in the world do I even START to write effective bullet 

statements?” Perhaps you’re in that situation right now, or perhaps you’re there for the 40th 

time! Well, it’s time to stop this endless cycle of pain and torment. Over the next few pages 

you’ll learn a tried and true system for building excellent bullet statements—plus it will save you 

lots of time and eliminate all of that frustration. Oh, got your attention, huh? Well OK, let’s get 

you started! 

STEP 1: EXTRACT THE FACTS 

The first leg of this journey begins by tackling the hardest part of bullet statement writing—

getting started! Most distressed bullet statement writers get into trouble early because they fail 

to identify all the information needed. It’s a common mistake! 

Gather the Information 

Collect all of the information you can find that is relevant to the actual accomplishment. When 

identifying this information, be sure to capture everything on paper or in a computer. At this 

stage, capture information that may seem even remotely related to the accomplishment; you can 

cut stuff out later. You are looking for the following types of information: 

Isolate one specific action the person performed (don’t generalize). 

Try to select the proper “power verb” that best describes this action (i.e., repaired, installed, 

designed, etc.). 

Look for as much numerical information as possible that is related to this action (number of 

items fixed, dollars generated, man-hours saved, people served, pages written, etc.). 

– 226 –
Performance Report 

Track down information about how this accomplishment impacted the bigger picture, the larger 

scope (How did it help the work center? How did it support the unit’s mission? How did it 

benefit the entire Air Force?). 

Be persistent when collecting your information, and start by talking to the person you’re writing 

about. They are in the best position to clarify and give exact details about what they’ve done and 

how they went about doing it. 

Another place to draw information from is coworkers and other supervisors who may have seen 

this person in action. But don’t stop there! You may need to consult Technical Orders, 

customers served, letters of appreciation, automated work production documents, or other 

sources to get all the information you need. 

It’s a great idea to track your subordinate’s accomplishments as they happen. Keep a record of 

significant work performance (both good and bad) by jotting them down on a document 

somewhere. This habit will help you be prepared when it’s time for a performance report or 

feedback. 

In most cases, gathering this information should not require a great deal of time. But be prepared 

to schedule ample time with various people and jot down things you need to include (or verify). 

Keep in mind that if you fail to collect the information needed up front, putting together strong 

bullet statements will be nearly impossible. A lack of research is something to avoid ... it will 

force you to rely less on convincing facts and more upon loose generalizations and incorrect 

guesses. 

Sort the Information 

Once you have the information captured, don’t be surprised if it looks like a host of different 

things all thrown together. Your next step is to review each item you’ve gathered and test it to 

see if it is truly associated with the single accomplishment you identified earlier or if these facts 

are completely unrelated. You can do this by applying the million-dollar question to each item: 

$$$ “Is this bit of information solidly connected to this single 

accomplishment?” $$$ 

If the answer is yes, flag the information as a keeper. If the answer is no, line through or flag the 

information as a nonkeeper ... but never throw it away or delete it! Although it may not be a 

good fit for the current bullet statement, it may be just what you need for another bullet you will 

soon be framing. 

Continue applying this question to all of the items you’ve collected for this bullet statement. 

Once you’re done with this process of sorting, you should have a neat little stack of information 

that pertains precisely to the target bullet statement. You’ve just eliminated any doubt 

concerning what should be included in this bullet, and what should not be included. 

STEP 2: BUILD THE STRUCTURE 

The next leg of our journey involves taking the information from Step 1 and organizing it into 

the proper structure of an accomplishment-impact bullet. There are essentially two major 

components: the accomplishment element and the impact element. 

 – 227 –
The Tongue and Quill 

The Accomplishment Element 

The accomplishment element should always begin with an action. Most of the time, this action 

takes the form of a strong action verb. Below you’ll find a short list of action verbs that can be 

used to start bullet statements. It’s nice to keep a list of verbs like this handy in preparation for 

writing that next EPR, OPR, or quarterly/annual award submission package. 

SAMPLE ACTION VERB

Accomplished 

Achieved 

Acquired

Acted 

Activated 

Actuated 

Adapts 

Adhered 

Adjusted 

Administered 

Advised 

Agitated

Analyzed 

Anticipated

Applied

Appraised 

Approved

Aroused 

Arranged

Articulated 

Assembled 

Asserted

Assessed 

Assigned

Assisted 

Assured 

Attained

Attend

Authorized 

Averted 

Bolstered

Brought 

Build

Calculated 

Capitalized

Catalyzed

Chaired

Challenged 

Clarified

Collaborate 

Collected 

Commanded 

Communicated 

Compared 

Compelled

Competed 

Compiled

Completed

Composed 

Comprehend

Computed 

Conceived 

Concentrated 

Conducted 

Conformed

Confronted

Considered

Consolidated 

Consulted 

Contacted 

Continued 

Contract

Contributed

Controlled 

Cooperate 

Coordinated 

Created 

Cultivated

Delegated

Demonstrated 

Deterred 

Developed 

Devised 

Displayed 

Dominated 

Drove 

Elicited

Embodied 

Emerged 

Emulated 

Encouraged

Endeavored

Energized 

Enforced 

Enhanced

Enriched 

Ensured 

Escalated 

Established

Exceeded 

Excelled

Expanded

Expedited 

Exploited 

Explored

Fabricated 

Facilitated

Focused 

Forced 

Formulated 

Generated 

Grasped 

Helped

Honed 

Identified

Ignited

Impassioned 

Implemented 

Improved 

Initiated

Inspired

Insured 

Invigorated 

Kindled 

Launched

Maintained

Manipulated

Motivated 

Organized 

Originated 

Overcame 

Oversaw 

Performed 

Perpetuated 

Persevered

Persuaded 

Planned 

Practiced 

Prepared

Produced

Projected

Promoted 

Prompted 

Propagated 

Propelled

Quantified

Rallied

Recognized 

Rectified

Refined 

Reformed 

Regenerated 

Rehabilitated

Rejuvenated 

Renewed 

Renovated 

Reorganized 

Required 

Resolved

Revived 

Sacrificed 

Scrutinized

Sought

Solved

Sparked 

Spearheaded 

Stimulated 

Strengthened

Strove 

Supervised 

Supported 

Surpassed 

Sustained 

Transformed 

Utilize

– 228 –
Performance Report 

In some cases, action verbs alone just cannot fully stress the strength or depth of someone’s 

accomplishment. If you need to give action verbs an added boost, use an adverb to modify the 

verb. Most adverbs are real easy to pick out ... they end with the last two letters “ly.” Try 

connecting some of the adverbs listed below to the verbs listed above to get a feel for how the 

adverb/verb combination can intensify the accomplishment element. 

Sample Adverbs

Actively 

Aggressively

Anxiously 

Ardently

Articulately 

Assertively 

Avidly

Boldly 

Competitively

Compulsively

Creatively 

Decisively 

Eagerly 

Energetically 

Enterprisingly

Enthusiastically 

Expeditiously 

Exuberantly

Feverishly 

Fiercely 

Forcefully 

Frantically 

Impulsively

Incisively

Innovatively 

Intensely

Powerfully 

Promptly

Prosperously

Provocatively 

Quickly

Relentlessly 

Restlessly 

Spiritedly 

Spontaneously

Swiftly 

Tenaciously 

Vigorously

Vigilant

Now that you get the general idea about how to begin the accomplishment element, let’s look at 

the rest of this critical part of the bullet statement. Broadly speaking, the accomplishment 

element contains all the words that describe a single action performed by a person. Yes, I know 

that sounds pretty simple, but you’d be surprised at how many writers violate this basic rule. If 

two or more actions are combined together in the same bullet, each of the actions is forced to 

share the strength of that entire statement. So rather than combining two or more actions to 

strengthen a single bullet, bullet statement writers must ensure bullets focus on only one single 

accomplishment. Two examples of an accomplishment element are listed below; one uses 

simply an action verb while the other uses a modifier (adverb) for added emphasis: 

- Processed over 300 records with no errors as part of the 42 ABW Mobility Exercise

- Tenaciously processed over 300 records with no errors as part of the 42 ABW Mobility 

Exercise

Quick review: the accomplishment element begins with some form of action (action verb only or 

modifier plus action verb) and contains a description of one single action or accomplishment. 

With that established, let’s look at the second portion of the bullet statement: the impact element. 

The Impact Element 

This part of the bullet statement explains how the person’s actions have had an effect on the 

organization. The impact element can show varying levels of influence. That is, the person’s 

actions may be connected to significant improvements to a work center’s mission, an entire unit 

mission, or as broad as the entire Air Force. One thing to keep in mind about the scope of the 

impact is that it should be consistent with the person’s accomplishment. For example, if the 

accomplishment explains how a person processed a large number of records during a base 

exercise, the impact should not be stretched or exaggerated to show how the Air Force will save

millions of dollars. We’ll chat more about “accuracy” later. For the time being, be extremely 

careful not to stretch the truth when rendering full credit for someone’s accomplishment. Check 

out the suggested impact element below: 

...all wing personnel met their scheduled clock times 

 – 229 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Connecting the Elements Together 

Connecting the accomplishment and impact elements together can be accomplished several 

ways. One of these ways is to use the “ing” form of words. See how the word “ensuring” 

connects our two elements in the example below: 

- Processed over 300 records with no errors as part of the 42 ABW Mobility Exercise

ensuring all wing personnel met their scheduled clock times 

Another way to connect these two elements together is to use conjunctive (just a fancy word 

meaning “joining things together”) punctuation. The most common form of conjunctive 

punctuation in bullet statements is the semicolon. Let’s set off our previous example with a 

semicolon to see this approach in action: 

- Processed over 300 records with no errors as part of the 42 ABW Mobility Exercise; all 

wing personnel met their scheduled clock times 

You may have noticed that in the two examples above, each bullet statement is set off with a 

single dash (-). If you have a situation where a person’s single accomplishment has more than 

one significant impact, you may be better off showing each impact element separately. To do 

this properly, cut the impact completely off the main bullet and make each impact element a 

separate subbullet (subordinate to the main bullet) with double-dashes (--). When making an 

impact serve as a subordinate bullet, try to start each one with an action verb. It’s much easier to 

comprehend this option by seeing it in action rather than by reading about it. So check out the 

example below: 

- Processed over 300 records with no errors as part of the 42 ABW Mobility Exercise

-- Ensured all wing personnel met their scheduled clock times 

-- Helped the wing garner an overall “OUTSTANDING” rating from the IG 

team 

There is just one more thing concerning structure we want to nail down before moving on to our 

third and final step. All Air Force bullet statement writers need to adhere to several rules that 

standardize the appearance and format of bullets on various documents. Take a few moments to 

get familiar with these rules. 

– 230 –
Performance Report 

BULLET STATEMENT MECHANICS 

- Start main bullets with a single dash ( - ) 

- Indent bullets so that the first character of the second (and subsequent) line(s) aligns 

directly under the first character (not dash) of the line above 

- Start subordinate bullets with additional dashes ( -- for secondary, --- for tertiary) 

- Indent subordinate bullets so that the first dash of the secondary (and tertiary) bullet(s) 

aligns directly under the first character (not dash) of the bullet above 

-- Secondary bullet is subordinate to main bullet 

--- Tertiary bullet is subordinate to secondary bullet 

- Never use ending punctuation in accomplishment-impact bullet statements 

- Always start an accomplishment-impact bullet statement with some form of action (action 

verb or modified verb) 

- Never start an accomplishment-impact bullet with a proper noun or pronoun 

- Minimize the use of the individual’s name in bullet statement when it is printed elsewhere 

on the document 

- Avoid using personal pronouns (he, she, his, her, etc.) in accomplishment-impact bullet 

statements; these devices typically serve to form complete sentences 

STEP 3: STREAMLINE THE FINAL PRODUCT 

Time for another quick review. After first extracting mounds of data to be used in drafting the 

bullets, we used a process to separate our extracted information into two different components: 

the accomplishment element and the impact element. Finally, we connected the two elements 

together and applied a handful of standardized rules to make the bullets appear strong and 

healthy looking. 

So where do we go from here? Now we need to Streamline the Final Product and make the 

bullet statement. It is here that we’ll refine the bullet statement by making it Accurate, Brief, and

Specific (ABS). Did you catch that acronym? Similar to doing “crunches” in the gym to shape 

our abdominal muscles, we’re going to crunch our bullet statements to give them some strong, 

healthy looking ABS. We’ll start this section by first defining each of these attributes in A-B-S 

order. 

Accuracy

For anything to be “accurate” it must be “correct.” People who have the most trouble with 

accuracy are those who try to stretch the truth. You may remember that we touched on this 

briefly in our description of the impact element earlier. Mild exaggeration or embellishment of 

the facts is poison and is only a half-step away from outright lying and falsifying the facts. 

Don’t ever let this happen to you. Let honesty, integrity, and accuracy be your watchwords. 

 – 231 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Brevity

In editing for brevity you are actually accomplishing two separate activities. First, you should 

select words (replacing as necessary) that are shortest, clearest, yet most descriptive to the 

readers. That means that long, confusing words or phrases get swapped out with shorter, clearer, 

more common terms. Second, you need to reduce the number of unnecessary words. Some of 

the words that all bullet writers should be looking to eliminate (or at least sharply reduce) are: 

- Articles: a, an, the 

- Helping verbs: can, could, may, might, must, ought, shall, should, will, would 

-- Also forms of be: be, am, is, are, was, were, been, being 

-- Also forms of have: have, has, had, having 

-- Also forms of do: do, does, did 

- Linking verbs: forms of verbs associated with five senses: look, sound, smell, feel, taste 

- Name of the person when their name is printed elsewhere on the document 

- Personal pronouns 

- Prepositions (use them sparingly): over, under, in, during, within, etc. 

Specificity

Specific bullet statements contain detailed facts. To write them, you’ll need to be familiar with 

the people and systems involved. Fight the urge to estimate or generalize. Don’t be satisfied 

with 10-20 of this, or about $1000 of that ... you need to make sure of the exact numbers ... 

right down to the penny if possible! 

Knowing the meaning of ABS (also known as “the critical attributes of bullet statements”) 

should help you make some “sweeping” changes to all the bullet statements you write. When 

you properly apply these attributes to your bullet statements, you will clean them up, trim them

down, and give them the all-around scrubbing they need before they become a permanent part 

of someone’s official record. 

Sculpting Your ABS 

Working these attributes into your bullet statements is like climbing into the ring for a few 

rounds of boxing. Oh yes, it may be a tough fight, but you’re going to pulverize that challenger! 

Ding! Ding! Ding! Ladies and gentlemen, in that corner over there, the challenger. Weighing 

in at “less than intimidating” and wearing the sagging trunks: the half-baked bullet statement! 

In this corner right here, sporting an impressive set of ABS, the reigning bullet statement editor, 

and undisputed champion: the Air Force supervisor! 

– 232 –
Performance Report 

All right, come to the center of the ring and take a closer look at your opponent. You’re going to 

put your ABS into action against the bullet statement below. No contest! 

- Repaired 17 seriously corroded broken or missing Log Periodic (LP) antenna 

elements in the Atlantic Gateway Antenna System within 3 days by using elements 

from decommissioned antenna parts saving an estimated $3500 in procurement 

cost and 4 weeks of expected delivery time 

Back to your corner for a moment to formulate a strategy. In an effort to save time, we’ll 

combine two of the attributes together during our first round of editing. Accuracy and specificity

are going in first, while brevity will wait patiently at ringside for round two.

ACCURACY and SPECIFICITY 

Ding! Round One. To make the bullet statement ACCURATE, you need to ensure the facts 

are correct. In a real-world setting we would verify the facts by simply asking a few questions. 

To simulate a realistic question and answer process that might occur in this situation, we’ll pose 

a few obvious questions and also list some answers that would be reasonably collected. 

- Were there truly 17 antenna elements repaired? Well, actually no ... not exactly. 

Seventeen elements were actually replaced, but an additional 23 were either sanded and 

painted or simply rescued. 

- Four weeks of delivery time seems like a long time ... why so much time to receive 

some antenna parts? The antenna elements come from only one vendor and the 

estimated delivery time is based on the relatively low priority of the work order. 

In order to make the facts in the bullet statement as SPECIFIC as possible, follow the same

question and answer method we used to guarantee accuracy ... that’s why we combined these 

two steps together!! Let’s see what kind of information a few questions can scrape up. 

- Exactly how many antennas (end items) in the system were fixed? The 40 antenna 

elements that were repaired or replaced were distributed among all 6 LP antennas in the 

system. 

- Can we be more specific than $3500 about the estimated cost savings? Yes, the exact 

cost charged to the unit for purchasing the 17 replacement antenna elements would have

been $3479. 

- What would the $3500 be spent on (item names, quantity, etc.)? The estimated cost of 

$3500 was limited to varying sizes of antenna elements for an AN/GRA-4(V)4 Log 

Periodic Antenna System. 

- Who does the Atlantic Gateway Antenna System service? The Atlantic Gateway 

connects Air Force and other DOD users from the eastern seaboard of the US to military 

personnel in Western Europe. 

- How has the repair of the antennas improved service to their customers? Transmit 

and receive signal strength was improved; static and cross-talk was reduced. 

 – 233 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Before we move on to the next round of editing, let’s work in some of the answers to our 

questions into the bullet statement. You’ll notice that not every tidbit of information we found 

could be added, but the items we did integrate contribute significantly to the message being sent. 

Items added or altered are represented in bold print. 

- Restored 40 seriously corroded, broken, or missing elements on 6 AN/GRA-4 Log Periodic 

Antenna Systems in the Atlantic Gateway Antenna System within 3 days by using elements 

from decommissioned antenna parts 

-- Saved an estimated $3479 in procurement cost and 4 weeks of expected delivery time

-- Sharply improved clarity of voice signal for operators in US and Europe

Ding! Ding! Ding! End of Round One. The added information enabled us to build an 

additional impact element and sharpen the exacting details of the preexisting bullet. You may 

have noticed that the bullet has grown in length again. Don’t sweat it! Because we are rested 

and ready to get back in the ring and wear down that lengthy bullet! Time to employ the secret 

weapon: brevity!

BREVITY 

Ding! Round Two. Let’s apply what we know about brevity to knock this bullet out! Keep in 

mind that keeping your editing for shorter words separate from your editing for a reduction of 

words may be difficult. Therefore, give each bullet statement the old “one-two” and do both at 

the same time! Changes made to improve one aspect often promote the other. 

Since we cannot boldface words or sections that have been removed or reduced, we need another 

way to indicate deletions, reductions, and occurrences of rephrasing. Carefully contrast the two 

versions of the bullet statements to see how certain terms and sections were reduced and 

consolidated. 

BEFORE Editing for Brevity

- Restored 40 seriously corroded, broken, or missing elements on 6 AN/GRA-4 

Log Periodic Antenna Systems in the Atlantic Gateway Antenna System

within 3 days by using elements from decommissioned antenna parts 

-- Saved an estimated $3479 in procurement cost and 4 weeks of expected 

delivery time 

-- Sharply improved clarity of voice signal for operators in US and Europe 

AFTER Editing for Brevity

- Restored 40 damaged elements on six AN/GRA-4 Log Periodic Antennas in 

three days using decommissioned antenna parts 

-- Saved $3479 and 4 weeks of expected delivery time

-- Sharply improved voice clarity for Atlantic Gateway Antenna System

operators in US and Europe 

– 234 –
Performance Report 

Ding! Ding! Ding! End of Round Two and the Match. The winner and still undisputed 

champion by KNOCK OUT! Yep, that’s you ... way to go champ! 

Well, I guess congratulations are in order! You’ve just successfully completed the process of 

drafting effective accomplishment-impact bullet statements. Not as difficult as you made it out 

to be, is it? With a little more practice, you can Extract the Facts, Build the Structure, and 

Streamline the Final Product with less and less effort. Writing accomplishment-impact bullets 

will become almost second nature to you. And the next time you’re hit with a bullet statement 

tasking (who knows ... maybe tomorrow), you’ll be prepared, fully armed and eager to climb 

back into that ring. Good luck! 

 

“The way we communicate with others and with ourselves ultimately determines the

quality of our lives.” 

 — Anthony Robbins, motivation speaker

 – 235 –
The Tongue and Quill 

RULES FOR WRITERS continue: 

" Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake. 

" Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be 

enclosed in commas. 

" Never use a big word when substituting a diminutive one would suffice. 

" Kill all exclamation points!!! 

" Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them. 

" Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth-shaking ideas. 

" Use the apostrophe in it’s proper place and omit it when its not needed. 

" If you’ve heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one 

writer in a million can use it correctly. 

" Puns are for children, not groan readers. 

" Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms. 

" Even IF a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed. 

" Who needs rhetorical questions? 

" Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement. 

And finally... 

" Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

– 236 –
AWARDS AND 

DECORATIONS 

MILITARY DECORATIONS Decorations are 

recommended to those 

who are PCSing, PCAing, 

separating, retiring, or

members who have served

more than 3 years on 

station. 

Awarded to an individual in recognition of heroism, or meritorious 

or outstanding service or achievement. Awarded for exceptionally 

distinguished service and accomplishments having significant Air 

Force-wide scope and impact covering a period of at least one year. 

MILITARY AWARDS 

A decoration, medal, badge, ribbon or appurtenance bestowed on an individual or a unit. 

CIVILIAN DECORATIONS 

Awarded for exceptionally meritorious service. Performed their assigned duties for at least one 

year that resulted in an Air Force-wide impact to programs or projects that benefited the 

government. 

CIVILIAN AWARDS 

Special recognition for superior accomplishments for a person in the form of a cash award, 

certificate or medal. 

For more in-depth guidance refer to Air Force Pamphlet 36-2861, Civilian Recognition Guide 

and/or Air Force Instruction 36-2803, Air Force Awards and Decorations Program.

 

 

“For a few yards of ribbon (medals), I could conquer the world.” 

— Napoleon 

– 237 –
The Tongue and Quill 

AWARD PACKAGE CHECKLIST 

DÉCOR 6 CHECKLIST: The DÉCOR 6 is the computer form used to recommend a 

decoration. Check to ensure it’s filled out completely (preferably typed, but can be neatly 

handwritten). 

_______Section 1A (NAME OF DECORATION), 1B (CLUSTER) and 1C (INCLUSIVE 

DATES) 

_______Section 1D and 1E—use a typewriter to X out the items not needed or line through with 

a black pen. 

_______SECTION 1F (PRESENTATION DATE DESIRED): Include date award is to be 

presented or N/A if no date is needed. Dates are mandatory for retirements and separations. 

_______1H (NEXT DUTY ASSIGNMENT OR FUTURE ADDRESS): This must be filled in if 

the person is separating or retiring. Personnel will send it back if an address is not included. 

_______SECTION 5. Make sure the duty title matches the title used in the citation. The date on 

the citation cannot be before the DATE ARRIVED STATION. Must be one day or more after. 

(See AFI 36-2803 for information about including more than one assignment in an 

award/citation.) 

_______SECTION 6 DECORATION HISTORY. This is the section where you will see the 

different decorations a person has received. When a person receives their first AFAM, this will 

be considered a basic award. When they receive a second AFAM, this will become their first 

oak leaf cluster. 

NOTE: If there is another decoration within the inclusive dates, ensure that a copy of the 

certificate is provided with the package; this helps to ensure two awards are not given for the 

same achievement. 

_______BLOCK 8. Make sure the supervisor has marked through either the “I 

RECOMMEND/DO NOT RECOMMEND” statement, as appropriate. Also be sure the 

supervisor and the commander have signed the printout. 

– 238 –
Awards and Decorations

CITATION CHECKLIST: The citation is read at the ceremony and summarizes the 

achievement or service for which the award is given. 

Check the body of the citation 

_______ Use 10- or 12-point font; borders should be top 1 to 1 1/2 inch, side 1 to 2 inch 

and bottom 3 inches. 

_______ Opening and closing statements should be in accordance with AFI 36-2803. 

_______ Length of citation should not exceed guidelines in AFI 36-2803. 

-- MSM and AFCM citations: 14 lines maximum 

-- AFAM citations: 11 or 12 lines maximum 

_______ Make sure the following information is not on separate lines: 

-- Rank and name

-- Unit and organization 

-- Date and month 

_______ Do not include inclusive dates in the text portion of the citation 

_______ Numbers 10 and above should be expressed in figures, and with exceptions, 

numbers “zero” through “nine” should be expressed in words. If both categories of numbers are 

used in the same related series, use figures for all. “Million” and “billion” should be spelled out 

($20 million). Use numbers for organizations; they would not detract from the readability or the 

professionalism of a decoration citation/certificate. The use of the dollar ($) and percent (%) 

signs are authorized for use in decoration citations/certificates. 

_______ No acronyms/symbols in body of citation. Rank should be spelled out the first 

time and shortened thereafter (e.g., Technical Sergeant Brian S. Bowers will be used in the first 

sentence. When referred to again, it should be “Sergeant Bowers.”) 

Check to make sure these items on the citation match the Décor 6: 

_______ Dates of accomplishment. 

_______ Oak leaf clusters (OLC). Use parentheses around the OLC on the citation. 

_______ Duty Title. 

Is the signature block correct? Different medals are signed at different levels of command. 

Senior commanders sign the higher level medals. 

JUSTIFICATION/APPROVAL CHECKLIST: 

______ Attach all OPR/EPRs that cover the inclusive dates. 

______ For awards for specific achievement, if the period is too short to supply a report, a 

letter or memorandum must be provided with descriptive justification. 

______ Check with your organization to see if additional forms are required to staff an 

award through the chain of command. (For example, Air Education and Training Command uses 

AETC Form 114; check your unit for any specific requirements.)

– 239 –
The Tongue and Quill 

– 240 –

WIN WITH WORDSMANSHIP

After years of hacking through etymological thickets at the US Public Health Service, Philip 

Broughton, a 69-year old official, created a surefire method to convert frustration into fulfillment 

(jargonwise). Euphemistically called the Systematic Buzz Phrase Projector, Broughton’s system

employs a lexicon of 30 carefully chosen “buzzwords”:

COLUMN 1 COLUMN 2 COLUMN 3 

0. integrated 0. management 0. options 

1. total 1. organizational 1. flexibility 

2. systematized 2. monitored 2. capability 

3. parallel 3. reciprocal 3. mobility

4. functional 4. digital 4. programming 

5. responsive 5. logistical 5. concept 

6. optional 6. transitional 6. time-phase 

7. synchronized 7. incremental 7. projection

8. compatible 8. third-generation 8. hardware 

9. balanced 9. policy 9. contingency

The procedure is simple. Think of any three-digit number, then select the corresponding

buzzword from each column. For instance, numbers 2, 5, and 7 produce “systematized logistical 

projection,” a phrase that can be dropped into virtually any report with that ring of decisive, 

knowledgeable authority. “No one will have the remotest idea of what you’re talking about,” 

says Broughton, “but the important thing is they’re not about to admit it.” 

This is definitely a 

four eighty-five. 
AIR FORCE 

PUBLICATIONS

This section expands on the functions and formats for Air Force publications—doctrine 

documents, policy directives, instructions, manuals, supplements, pamphlets, indexes, 

directories, handbooks, catalogs, joint publications, and changes (page and message) to those 

publications—as in the Air Force Instruction 33-360, Volume 1, Air Force Content Management 

Program—Publications. There may be a time in your military career when you will put on your 

action officer hat and write or develop an Air Force publication, form or Information 

Management Tool (IMT), regardless of your command level. 

Publications serve a vital purpose—they direct and explain the policies and procedures 

governing Air Force functions. You, the action officer who writes these publications, are the 

expert in the various functions; you are the specialist in the different kinds of work done in the 

Air Force. When you write a publication, your role is to explain what work must be done and 

how it must be done by the people who must do it. The action officer’s role is a demanding one. 

Preparing a publication is, by itself, a complex process. Additionally, you have two important 

responsibilities to meet. 

• To provide clear, accurate guidance that others understand and follow. 

• To get your guidance out quickly to those who need it. 

These responsibilities are equally important, but at times will seem to conflict. A well-prepared 

publication takes less time to publish and reach its users than a poorly prepared one. Always 

take the time to prepare a well-written publication. To do this, you ... 

• Plan carefully and become familiar with AFI 33-360, Volume 1, procedures to prepare, to 

submit and to coordinate a publication. 

Follow the Seven Steps to Effective Communication and concentrate on organizing material 

logically, drafting a comprehensive outline, and writing clear and concise sentences. 

– 241 –
The Tongue and Quill 

GETTING STARTED... 

1 GETTING ORGANIZED. For more information, go to page 56 without collecting $200 

or contact your local publishing office for local procedures and guidance.

2 WRITING EFFECTIVELY. Use plain English with active voice; plain, concrete words; 

correct verb tenses (see pages 98-99) and simple sentences in a formal tone and style. 

3 EDITING PRACTICES. 

 Avoid contractions (flip to page 310), and except and other qualifiers detailed on page 77. 

 Use the Mechanics of Writing section for punctuation, abbreviation, capitalization and 

numbers. 

 Use functional address symbols sparingly. If needed, spell out symbols with the 

abbreviation and include a complete mailing address. [Visual Information/Publishing 

Division (HQ USAF/SCMV), 1250 AF Pentagon, Washington DC 20330-1250, see the 

Envelope section] 

4 DEVELOPING TITLES. Writing good titles requires some thought ... a few guidelines to 

get you moving are given below: 

Do ..

& Keep titles short and descriptive. The 

title of each paragraph describes the 

subject of the entire paragraph; the title 

of a section describes the overall 

subject of all the paragraphs within the 

section; the title of a chapter describes 

the overall subject of all the sections 

within that chapter.

& Use “General” sparingly—it’s too 

broad. It may describe the material in a 

division but not the subject of that 

division. If your first chapter contains 

intro material, try “Introduction.”

& Use only form/IMT numbers, or figure 

and table numbers. But, when using in 

the text, ensure its title follows.

& Include the report control symbol only 

in the title of the division it prescribes. 

Do not ...

' Repeat the titles of main divisions or 

the titles of subdivisions within one 

division.

' Repeat the titles to a chapter and a 

section within that chapter, or 

paragraph titles within a section.

' Use abbreviations and acronyms. If 

you cannot avoid, include both the 

abbreviation and its meaning, or 

include it by itself after it has been 

explained in a preceding title.

' Use contractions in titles!

– 242 –
BIOGRAPHY 

A current biography can be a helpful personal and management tool. You may want to send 

your biography to organizations you may be visiting or groups you may be speaking before. It 

may be helpful to your organization for key personnel to maintain biographies so newcomers can 

have a better understanding of the backgrounds of unit leadership. Your public affairs office 

may use your biography to assist in preparation of articles for publication. 

A biography gives the reader some insight into who you are, where you’ve been assigned and the 

jobs you have handled. It should also include your education, awards, and if rated, flying hours 

and the type of aircraft experience. Ideally, it would also include an official Air Force 

photograph. 

The Air Force electronically publishes official biographies for active-duty general officers, 

senior-level civilian executives and the chief master sergeant of the Air Force. Air Force public 

affairs prepare these biographies following the instructions found in AFI 35-101, Public Affairs 

Policies and Procedures. See http://www.af.mil/lib/bio/index.html for examples. 

Applying the procedures from the Air Force instruction, on pages 244-245 is an outline of the 

parts of an Air Force biography. It is important to follow the recommended format so that there 

is consistency of presentation, style, and length of information. A “corporate look” needs to be 

maintained so readers are not confused going from one biography to another. Also, it makes for 

ease of distribution whether the biography is printed, posted on a web site, or sent by e-mail. 

(NOTE: Air Force general officers and the Senior Executive Service must follow the outline in 

AFI 35-101 and the Associated Press style of news writing.) 

– 243 –
The Tongue and Quill 

FORMAT FOR BIOGRAPHY 

Rank and Name (ALL CAPS) 

First paragraph. Rank/Mr.; Mrs.; Ms. and Name, Duty Title, Unit/Organization, Base/City and 

State. (Include a short statement of current job responsibilities. If included, the statement must 

conform to current policies concerning Internet security.)

Second paragraph. Courtesy title (i.e.: Major Smith; Mr. Smith; Ms. Smith) is a (year) graduate 

of (college). Begin a brief nontechnical narrative (two short paragraphs) in chronological order 

of military/civilian career, including more prestigious tours of duty and locations. Avoid listing 

every assignment. 

Duty titles, not job descriptions or designations, will be capitalized. (Example 1: His staff tours 

include duty as Manager, name of Section/Directorate. Example 2: Major Smith served as 

(Duty Title or job title.) He managed the logistics group in Europe, including duty in special 

interest projects (name project) for the commander. 

Third paragraph. If needed, continue job information. DO NOT include family information. 

EDUCATION 

(In chronological order, list year, type of degree earned, field in which earned, school attended, 

and location. Executive courses should include the year, full name of course, school attended, 

and the location [city and state].)

1965 Bachelor of Science degree in (degree), Syracuse University, Syracuse, NY 

1976 Air Command and Staff College, Maxwell Air Force Base, AL 

1976 Master’s Degree in Business Administration, Auburn University, AL 

ASSIGNMENTS (CAREER CHRONOLOGY FOR CIVILIANS) 

Show service from beginning month/year assigned to ending month/year, position, unit assigned, 

location. (Civilians may list year to year only. Career Chronology will include military and 

civilian assignments for civilians who have served in the Armed Forces. For their military 

assignments include year-to-year, position, unit assigned, and location. Duty titles will be 

capitalized; job descriptions or job designations will not.)

1. Month and Year – Month and Year, job description, organization, Base/City, State. 

2. Continue entries to present assignment showing dates, duties, and locations. The last entry in 

the assignments section should match the first line of the biography. NOTE: Significant 

temporary duty assignments within a normal duty assignment should be included in the same

entry with the main assignment. Example: 3. Month and year – Month and year, job duty, unit, 

Base/City, State (Month and year – Month and year, job duty, unit, Base/City, State). The 

assignment in parenthesis is the temporary assignment. 

– 244 –
Biography 

MAJOR AWARDS AND DECORATIONS (AWARDS AND HONORS FOR CIVILIANS) 

If an award needs to be explained, it should not be included in this section. Instead, include the 

information as part of the narrative in paragraphs 2 or 3. 

Vietnam Service Medal 

Republic of Vietnam Campaign Medal 

Kuwait Liberation Medal (specify Government of Saudi Arabia or Government of Kuwait)

PROFESSIONAL MEMBERSHIPS AND AFFILIATIONS 

(List memberships or former memberships within last 5 years only)

Air Force Association 

Order of Daedalians 

Women’s Bar Association 

OTHER ACHIEVEMENTS 

2000 “Who’s Who in America” 

PUBLICATIONS 

“Titles of Books/Published Articles,” Name of publication and the year published 

EFFECTIVE DATES OF PROMOTION: (CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER)

(Current as of January 2003) 

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION: 

1. When preparing a biography, list the name and address of the organization owning the 

biography on the top portion of the first page. 

2. Only official Air Force photographs may be used on the biography. Post the photo on the 

right side of the narrative.

 – 245 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn: 

1) The bandage was wound around the wound. 

2) The farm was used to produce produce. 

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse. 

4) We must polish the Polish furniture. 

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out. 

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert. 

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to 

present the present. 

8) A bass was painted on the head of a bass drum. 

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes. 

10) I did not object to the object. 

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid. 

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row. 

13) They were too close to the door to close it. 

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present. 

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line. 

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow. 

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail. 

18) After a number of Novocain injections, my jaw got number. 

19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear. 

20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests. 

21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend? 

22) I spent last evening evening out a pile of dirt. 

– 246 –
RÉSUMÉ 

No, the résumé is not an official Air Force communication, but it is included for two reasons: (1) 

to help you when you are considered for a “special” assignment and need to give “someone” a 

summary of your experience and qualifications, and (2) to help you when you start job searching 

after your military or civil service career. 

Getting interviewed for positions in which you are interested isn’t always easy, but a good 

résumé can help. In many cases, your résumé is the first impression a potential employer has of 

you. The way it is written and how it looks are a direct reflection of you and your 

communication and organization ability. Your résumé must arouse the interest of a potential 

employer enough to make him want to meet you from a stack of hundreds of applicant résumés 

for a single job. Since no one is likely to interview a large number of applicants, “someone” will 

scan the résumés (for about 20 seconds each), choose those that will be read further, and trash 

the remainder. Therefore, your résumé has to make an impression quickly to make it pass the 

hiring official. 

– 247 –
The Tongue and Quill 

FUNCTION AND FORMAT 

In some cases, the format you use will depend upon why you need a résumé. Is it a “feeler” to 

send to multiple companies? A response to a particular announcement? A specific request from

a person or company? Generally speaking, a format that works best for you is the right one. 

c Chronological Résumé. An outline of your work experience and periods of employment 

(in reverse chronological order—most recent information first) that shows steady employment. 

Titles and organizations are emphasized as are duties and accomplishments. This format is used 

most often by those with steady employment and/or who want to remain in a current career field. 

It’s also excellent for those who have shown advancement within a specific career field. Detail a 

10-year period and summarize earlier experience that is relevant to the position you are seeking.

d Functional Résumé. Emphasizes your qualifications (skills, knowledge, abilities, 

achievements) as opposed to specific dates and places of employment, and allows you to group 

them into functional areas such as training, sales, procurement, and accounting. List the 

functional areas in the order of importance as related to the job objective and stress your 

accomplishments within these functional areas. This format is used most often by people who 

are reentering the work force or those who are seeking a career change. 

e Combination Résumé. Combines the best of the chronological and functional résumés 

because you can group relevant skills and abilities into functional areas and then provide your 

work history, dates and places of employment, and education. This format allows you to cover a 

wider variety of subjects and qualifications, thereby showing skills that are transferable from one 

career to another. It works well for those “special” assignment requirements, for military retirees

(those who have frequently switched career fields), and is ideal for people whose career paths 

have been somewhat erratic. 

f Targeted Résumé. As the name implies, this format focuses on your skills, knowledge, 

abilities, achievements, experience, and education that relate to the targeted position. It features 

a series of bullet statements regarding your capabilities and achievements related to the targeted 

job. Experience is listed to support statements, but it does not need to be emphasized. Education 

is listed after achievements. This format is probably the easiest to write, but keep in mind it must 

be completely reaccomplished for each position you are seeking. 

g Federal Résumé. An outline for the Federal Government and private industry to apply for 

Federal job searches. This résumé is commonly five pages by the time all your information is 

included so it does not follow the “keep it to two pages max” rule. Once you submit your 

résumé, there may be further forms to complete. When in doubt as to what to include, read your 

announcement carefully. Still in doubt? Call and ask questions. Generally include this: Job 

info: announcement number, title and grade of job for which you’re applying; personal info: 

full name, address, day and evening phone numbers, social security account number, country or 

citizenship, reinstatement eligibility, veteran’s preference, highest Federal civilian grade held; 

education: high school and college name and address, type and year of degree, major; work 

experience: job title, duties and accomplishments, employer’s address, supervisor’s name and 

phone number, starting and ending dates, hours per week, salary; job related info: training (with 

title, date), skills, certificates, honors, awards, accomplishments. 

– 248 –
Résumé 

h Military Résumé. If you are applying for a competitive assignment, a résumé may be a 

useful tool to summarize your qualifications for the position. You can use whatever format you 

think showcases your abilities, but make sure you include the following: 

; Security clearance and date of investigation. This is critical for some jobs—and in some

cases, you’ll need a higher level clearance just to get in the building! 

; Date of rank. This helps potential supervisors know how your seniority relates to the

incumbents in the office ... and helps them know when you’ll be up for promotion. 

; Professional Military Education. Make sure you identify any schools completed while in 

residence and any distinguished graduate (DG) recognition. 

; Service Status. Air Force Reserve or National Guard personnel should identify their service 

status. 

; Availability. When will you be eligible for reassignment? Include this in the “Job 

Objective” section. 

; Special Qualifications. As appropriate, identify any special workplace qualifications such 

as foreign language skills, Acquisition Profession Development Program (APDP) 

Certification or Joint Officer credentials. 

; Flying Data. Even if the position is not a “flying job,” rated officers may want to include 

rated information. 

 

 

 

 

“I lost my last three jobs because of clumsiness. I got fired from the optical supply co. 

because I was an eye-dropper, from the sign co. because I was a name-dropper, and from 

the gutter co. because I was an eavesdropper.” 

— from a Frank and Earnest cartoon 

 by Bob Thaves

– 249 –
The Tongue and Quill 

PUTTING IT TOGETHER 

Let’s march through the six-step checklist again to write your résumé. 

1 ANALYZE PURPOSE AND AUDIENCE. Your purpose ... get a meeting with a potential 

employer. 

2 CONDUCT THE RESEARCH. Know yourself: your needs and wants (type and level of the 

position), what you can offer and what you can do for them. Now take time to list your skills 

and accomplishments. And research the prospective company to learn about the job as well as to 

“speak their language.” 

3 SUPPORT YOUR IDEAS. Your “ideas” ... the qualifications for the job. The “support” ... 

your knowledge, skills, abilities, experience and education that support those qualifications. 

4 GET ORGANIZED. Gather your documents: job descriptions, certificates, licenses, 

transcripts. If you worked for DOD, “civilianize” those job titles and descriptions to those used 

in the private sector ... consult a Dictionary of Occupational Titles, published by the US 

Department of Labor. Learning the company’s terminology could mean the difference between a 

20-second scan and a “meeting.” 

5 DRAFT AND EDIT. Type your draft and edit, edit, edit for typos, extraneous information, 

action words (see page 228), plain language (businesses typically write on an 8th grade level), 

neatness, accuracy, and consistency in format. It must be long enough to cover relevant 

information but brief enough not to bore a potential employer (two pages max). Use only key 

phrases and words appropriate to the job you’re seeking. To help you develop your 

accomplishment statements, review the advice on writing “accomplishment-impact” bullets on 

pages 226-235. 

6 FIGHT FOR FEEDBACK. Have someone you trust read the résumé and suggest changes and 

recommendations. Are all the t’s crossed and i’s dotted? Does it look professional? Visually 

appealing? Is it easy to read with the strongest points quickly apparent? Is there good use of 

spacing, margins, indentions, capitalization and underlining?

– 250 –
Résumé 

TO INCLUDE OR NOT TO INCLUDE 

As a minimum, include the following on all résumés: 

; Name, address, and phone number (including the area code) centered at the top of the first 

page.

; Job objective and/or summary statement. 

; Qualifications and work experience relevant to the job you are seeking.

; Education and training (anything acquired during military service or through workshops, 

seminars, and continuing education classes relevant to the position you’re seeking).

The following are other topic areas to include but choose only those pertinent to the job you’re 

seeking. CAUTION: More is not necessarily better. Keep your résumé to one page, if 

possible, or two pages max. 

& Special skills or capabilities

& Career accomplishments

& Languages studied

& Honors and awards

& Military service

& E-mail address

& Professional experience and 

memberships

& Leadership activities

& Credentials, licenses

& Papers, presentations, published works 

& Security clearance 

The following information can sometimes be detrimental and takes up valuable space on a 

résumé, so we recommend you don’t include it unless a potential employer specifically asks for 

it. 

' Personal data (age, marital status, 

number and ages of children)

' Photograph

' Salary history or requirement

' Reason for leaving a job and names of 

bosses

' Religious affiliation

' Irrelevant information

' Hobbies or personal interests

' References

' Months, days—use “years” only

' Specific security information

 

– 251 –
The Tongue and Quill 

COVER MEMO 

A cover letter is a personal communication written to a specific person in an organization. But 

your same résumé can be sent to many potential employers. Write your cover memo so that the 

person reading it will want to read the résumé you’ve attached. To help out here’s a checklist: 

; Address the letter, if possible, to a person (use a title) with whom you wish to meet. Avoid 

Dear Sir, Gentlemen—clearly these are not gender-neutral terms. 

; Use a positive tone and stress how your association with them will benefit you both. To 

sound genuine, research the organization and the position to learn all you can. Make it 

sound natural, relaxed, and not self-conscious. The letter needs action verbs, personal 

pronouns, life, conviction, humor, assurance, and confidence, ensuring you exclude 

irrelevant and negative information. Try saying “changing careers” or “looking for new 

challenges” instead of retired; and “single” instead of divorced. 

; Limit it, to hold interest, to one page with about three paragraphs. 

; Develop a strong first sentence to grab the reader’s attention and, when possible, use a name

of a mutual contact. 

; Devote the next paragraph to brief facts by highlighting your relevant experience, skills, and 

accomplishments that make you unique for the job. It needs to entice the reader to call you. 

Consider using “bullets” to create eye appeal. And place the most relevant information in 

the first (or top) position. 

; Close with a bid for a brief meeting (don’t use interview) and write as though you expect it 

to occur. Indicate you will follow up with a call to arrange a time. 

; Make it look professional—use the computer to make a good first impression! And edit, 

edit, edit! 

; Use 81⁄2- by 11-inch high-quality paper that is white or off-white. 

; Maintain electronic file copies and borrow from past letters to save your brain power when 

submitting future letters!

 

 

 

 

“Writing is an adventure. To begin with, it is a toy and an amusement. Then 

it becomes a mistress, then it becomes a master, then it becomes a 

tyrant. The last phase is that just as you are about to be reconciled to 

your servitude, you kill the monster and fling him to the public.” 

— Winston Churchill

– 252 –
Résumé 

BODY STYLE 

The examples that follow on pages 254-258 are provided primarily to give you a starting point 

and to illustrate style. More detailed information can be found in libraries and book stores or 

gotten from professional résumé writers. When writing your résumé, remember, the best 

qualified person doesn’t always get the job—sometimes it’s the person who knows how to get 

the job. 

Cover Letter 

PO Box 9553 

Seattle, Washington 54321-9553 

July 7, 2004 

Ms. Rena Mitchell 

Government Contracts Advisor 

Bowe and Burke International Corporation 

1472 South 303d Street 

Seattle, Washington 98003-1472 

Dear Ms. Mitchell,

I recently read about Bowe and Burke in the Seattle Tribune. I talked to Nancy Herron today and she mentioned

you need an additional staff person for your government contract work. 

I am interested in this position and believe you will find these particular aspects of my background relevant 

to this position:

 ● As project manager for a statewide fund-raising campaign, I recruited and supervised personnel, administered the 

 budget, and oversaw the development of promotional materials. 

 ● As manager of 300 volunteers for an organization, I handled diverse management functions—scheduled work, 

 evaluated personnel, organized supply and equipment resources, and controlled cash receipts and other assets. 

 ● I have extensive knowledge of your company’s computer software and have developed personnel and accounting 

 programs to expedite management functions. 

 ● My bachelor’s degree in business administration includes course work in personnel administration and accounting. 

 Since I am difficult to reach, I will telephone you on Wednesday, July 17, to arrange for a meeting where I can learn 

more about your requirements and tell you more about my background as it relates to you. Thank you for your 

consideration and I look forward to being in touch.

 Sincerely,

 Mary Middleton 

MARY MIDDLETON

Attachment: 

Résumé 

– 253 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Chronological résumé 

KAREN CALLOWAY

173 Brunnen Street 

Germantown, Iowa 54321-6652

(319) 386-0464

 JOB OBJECTIVE 

 Challenging writer-editor position.

 EXPERIENCE

 Writer-Editor, Middletown College, Middletown, Iowa, 1993-Present

 Researched and wrote curriculum materials for ... Edited curriculum materials 

 written by ... ensuring ... and verifying facts and figures. Researched, designed, 

 wrote, typeset, and distributed a 55-page administrative handbook and a 21-page textbook 

 preparation guide for ... Supervised three ... 

 Editorial Assistant, The Middletown Journal, Middletown, Iowa, 1990-1993

Typed, edited, and proofread all articles prepared by reporters and staffers for 

 the weekly newspaper. Produced ... Recommended ... Prepared ... 

 EDUCATION

Enrolled in Education Specialist Program, Troy State College (Anticipated completion 

 December 1997) 

MAG in Adult Education, Troy State College, Middletown, Iowa, 1993

BS in English, Troy State College, Middletown, Iowa, 1992

 PROFESSIONAL MEMBERSHIPS 

 American Writers Guild 

Association of Professional Editors 

 AWARDS 

Best Book Award, American Council of Teachers of English, 1991

 PERSONAL INTERESTS 

 Free-lance writing, photography, publishing

– 254 –
Résumé 

Functional résumé 

CHARLES CATO 

3941 Graff Road

Millbrook, Alabama 36054-0001

(205) 285-4333

JOB OBJECTIVE Information systems resource manager specializing in microcomputers 

 with emphasis on training and development. 

 QUALIFICATIONS Resource Management: Managed $300 million inventory of hardware 

 and software resources for 13 individual computer systems, 5 aircraft

 simulators, and 40 microcomputers. Reorganized ... Identified ...,

 formulated new policies, updated ... and revised ... Researched and 

 developed ... Planned and supervised ... Reduced computer supply

 acquisition costs by $150K through ... 

 Systems Analysis: Coordinated weekly ... Organized, developed, 

 and supervised the ... Designed training ... and developed self-study 

 course ... implemented data base ... that resulted in ... 

 Quality Control: Developed, coordinated, and managed ... Assessed 

 contractor ... Provided technical analysis of ... 

 Programming: Developed and maintained ... 

EDUCATION Enrolled in MA in Business Administration with emphasis in 

 Information Systems, University of Alabama, Tuscaloosa, Alabama 

 (Expected graduation December 1997)

BS, Mathematics and Computer Science, Tulane University, New 

 Orleans, Louisiana, 1996 (GPA 3.1) 

 

 – 255 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Combination (chronological and functional) résumé 

FELICIA VINSON

317 Rue Du Congo

Vienna, Virginia 23230-4590 

(703) 236-7052

OBJECTIVE A position using skills and education that offers growth with

 increasing responsibility. 

SUMMARY Experienced in financial and retail organizations emphasizing office 

 administration, accounting and supervisory skills. 

 QUALIFICATIONS Accounting and Finance. Performed accounting and administrative 

 procedures for large banking institution and retail sales organization. 

 Completed ... Balanced ... Recorded bank ... Calculated daily ... 

 resulting in reduction of ... and savings of ... 

 Management and Administration. Administered ... Operated computer 

 to verify ... Researched monthly ... Supervised 3 to 6 employees ... 

 Managed retail stores with merchandise worth $300,000, reducing ... 

 and saving ... 

 EXPERIENCE

1992-1997 Manager, Boomers Stores, Washington DC

1991-1992 Assistant Manager, Sun Savings, Wheaton, Maryland 

1990-1991 Accountant, Midway Bank, Midway, Maryland 

 1987-1990 Assistant Contracting Officer, United States Air Force 

1980-1990 United States Air Force 

EDUCATION BS, General Business Administration, University of Pennsylvania, 

 1992

Professional Senior Management Course, University of Northern 

 Virginia, 1993 

Middle management training, United States Air Force, 1990

– 256 –
Résumé 

Targeted résumé 

KEVIN JONES 

6953 Oakside Drive 

Harlem, Georgia 30814-7606 

(706) 277-5084

 JOB OBJECTIVE Senior credit analyst in an engineering department with potential 

for advancement within the corporation.

CAPABILITIES - Analyzed credit data to ... 

- Prepared reports of ...

- Studied, researched, reported ... 

- Evaluated ... and prepared reports ...

- Consulted with ... on ... 

ACHIEVEMENTS - Responsible for ... 

- Supervised a staff of ... responsible for $2 million inventory of ... 

 - Maintained ... 

- Acted as ... 

- Saved ... work hours and ... dollars ... 

 EXPERIENCE

1992-present Senior Credit Analyst, Georgia South Corporation, 

 Macon, Georgia 

1991-1992 Credit and Collection Manager, General Electric, 

Clinton, New Jersey 

1988-1991 Claims Examiner, Great Western, Billings, New Jersey 

EDUCATION MBA in Finance, Pace University, Monroe, Connecticut, 1991 

BS in Accounting, Northeast College, Penham, Massachusetts, 1988 

 (Honors graduate) 

 – 257 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Federal Government résumé 

CALVIN SMITH 

2616 Elberta Street 

Northport, Alabama 35475-4924

Day (205) 333-6327

Evening (205) 333-8534 

E-mail: csmith@aol.com

Citizenship: United States Federal Status: Civil Engineer, GS-802-11 

SSAN: 555-123-4487 Veteran’s Status: USAF, 1976-1996, Retired 

OBJECTIVE: Civil Engineer, GS-12; Announcement No. 97-113 

PROFILE: Civil engineer with 10 years’ experience with an emphasis ... projects ranging 

from $50K to $900K ... Report to project civil engineer concerning construction analysis, 

planning ... Projects include: parking lots, roads, bridges ...

SUMMARY OF QUALIFICATIONS

Management and Administration. Administered ... Operated computer to verify ... 

Researched monthly ... Supervised 3-6 employees ... Managed projects worth ... 

reducing ...and saving ... 

EDUCATION AND TRAINING

BS Civil Engineer Princeton University, 1986

WORK EXPERIENCE

TUSCALOOSA ENGINEERING, Tuscaloosa, Alabama 

Supervisor: Jack Ward June 1994 to present 

Starting Salary: $30,000 40 hours a week

Contact may be made 

 

 Project Manager

z Project manager for ... ranging from ... 

z Manages ... simultaneously ... Customers include ... monthly ... Coordinates ... 

Engineering Technician

z Plans ... Designs ... Manages ... Interacts with ... to fulfill project ... 

z Reviews ...

OTHER QUALIFICATIONS

Security clearance Computer skills 

– 258 –
ENVELOPE 

Using a standard envelope format helps the Postal Service identify the correct delivery address 

the first time that the mail piece is processed on postal equipment. Optical character readers 

(OCR) can read a combination of uppercase and lowercase characters in addresses but prefers all 

uppercase characters. Even though OCR enhancements now allow effective reading of 

punctuation in addresses, it is still suggested that punctuation be omitted, when possible. For 

faster, more accurate processing, include in the delivery address the street designators (for 

example, BLVD, DR); directional designators (for example, NE, SW); the apartment, suite, or

room number; and a ZIP+4 code. Do not use bold, italic, script, artistic, or other unusual 

typefaces. Handwritten or rubber stamps should not be used. 

0.5” 0.5”

2.75” 

0.625

AWC/DFPC

325 CHENNAULT CIRCLE 

MAXWELL AFB AL 36112-6426 

OFFICIAL BUSINESS

 OCR READ AREA 

MR KENNETH BRODIE 

 HQ AF/ILCXE 

 1250 AIR FORCE PENTAGON 

 WASHINGTON DC 20330-1250

4.5” 

 BARCODE CLEAR AREA 

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The Tongue and Quill 

ADDRESSING THE ENVELOPE 

When preparing communications for dispatch, remember to use the appropriate size envelope for 

all correspondence. Use a rectangular envelope only slightly larger than the correspondence. 

Envelopes should be no smaller than 3.5 by 5 inches and no larger than 6.125 by 11.5 inches. 

When using window envelopes, be sure to adjust the MEMORANDUM FOR element to align 

the address with the envelope window. For consolidated mailing, the largest item that cannot be

folded determines the envelope size. Do not use envelopes with clasps, staples, string buttons, or 

similar securing devices. Limit the thickness of any envelope to one-fourth inch or less when

sealed. Write “nonmachineable” above the address on any envelope if it is more than one-fourth 

inch thick. There should be no printed or stamped markings of slogans or designs. This applies 

to labels, post cards and self-mailers. 

 Envelope Format. Use Courier New font 12 point (or similar simple sans serif font). Be 

sure characters are not too close together and do not touch or overlap. Leave margins at least 

0.5-inch from the left and right edges of the envelope and at least 0.625-inch from the bottom of 

the envelope. The last line of the address should be no lower than 0.625-inch and no higher than 

2.75 inches from the bottom of the envelope. 

 Return Address Format. Place the return address in the upper left corner of the envelope. 

Do not include names in return addresses. Type in uppercase with no punctuation except the 

hyphen in the zip code. Use the complete mailing address. Type “OFFICIAL BUSINESS” at 

least two line spaces below the return address. Rubber stamps may not be used in the return 

address portion of the envelope. 

 Delivery Address Format. Use block style with a left margin, parallel to the long edge of

the envelope. Single-space the address block and type the entire address in uppercase. Use one 

or two spaces between words. Do not use punctuation in the last two lines of the address block 

except for the dash in the ZIP+4 code. Address area limited to five lines. 

Optional Address Data Line. Use this line for any nonaddress data such as account 

numbers, presort codes, or mail stop codes. 

Optional Attention (ATTN) Line. Use this line to direct mail to a specific person. It is 

the first line of the address. If the letter is sensitive information or for recipient eyes only, type 

“PERSONAL FOR MS JANE DOE” on this line. 

Organization Abbreviation/Office Symbol Line. Use the organization abbreviation 

and office symbol separated by a virgule (/). 

Delivery Address Line. Used for the street or post office (PO) box number, and the 

room or suite number. Use standard address abbreviations on page 313. Do not use punctuation 

on this line. You can spell out or abbreviate portions of the street address, e.g., AVE or 

AVENUE, STE or SUITE; both are acceptable. When addressing mail, do not use both the post 

office box and the street address—pick one. 

City or Base, State, ZIP+4 Code Line. Use one or two spaces between words. Use the 

two-letter state abbreviations. Do not use punctuation except for the dash in the ZIP+4 code. 

With overseas addresses, do not use the APO or FPO number and geographical location together; 

this will cause the mail to enter the international mail channels. Do not type below the last line 

– 260 –
Envelope 

of the delivery address. Addresses are limited to five lines. Most printers today have the ability 

to print barcodes. This added function can help route your letter. 

POUCH MAIL 

Used to consolidate mail going to the same location. Contact your local official mail manager or 

base information transfer center for local pouch listing. 

HOLEY JOE (STANDARD FORM 65-C) 

Used to send mail within an organization or base. Address to the organizational designation and 

office symbol. If more than one person falls under the office symbol, consider using an ATTN 

line. 

PARCELS 

Labels should be placed on the top of the box or package. Any container used should be only 

slightly larger than the mail being sent. Seal boxes and package with paper tape. 

To help you select the most cost-effective class of mail, review the definition listed on the next 

page. 

 – 261 –
The Tongue and Quill 

DEFINITIONS 

Official Mail. Official matter mailed as penalty mail or on

 which the postage of fees have been prepaid.

Official Matter. Official matter is any item belonging to or

 exclusively pertaining to the business of the 

 US Government.

Certified 

Provides a receipt to sender and a record of delivery at destination. 

For use with First-Class and Priority Mail.

Official Mail Policies

The United States Postal Service (USPS) shall be used only when it is 

the least costly transportation method which will meet the required 

delivery data (RDD), security, and accountability requirements. When

mailed, official matter shall move at the lowest postage and fees cost

to meet the RDD, Security, and accountability requirements. 

Official matter becomes official mail when it is postmarked by a 

distribution center or is placed under USPS control, whichever occurs

first. Official matter ceases to be official mail when control passes 

from USPS or its representatives to someone else.

Insured 

Numbered insured service provides a method to obtain evidence of

mailing and a record of delivery. 

Certificate of Mailing (AF units must not use this service) 

Provides evidence of mailing. 

Special Handling (AF units must not use this service) 

Provides preferential handling to the extent practical in dispatch and

transportation, but does not provide special delivery. Applicable to

third-and fourth-class mail.

Classes of Mail 

Express Mail 

Fastest and most costly. Use only to prevent mission failure or 

financial loss.

First-Class 

Any mailable item weighting 11 ozs. or less. Certain items must be

mailed First-Class such as letters, handwritten or typewritten and 

post/postal cards.

Priority

Any mailable First-Class matter weighing over 11 ozs. but less than 70

lbs. Must be marked PRIORITY. 

Second-Class

For magazines and other periodicals issued at regular, stated frequency

of no less than four times per year. 

Third-Class 

For printed matter and parcels under 1 lb. Four ounces or less-same 

rate as first-class. Special bulk rates for larger mailings (at least 200 

pieces or 50 lbs.) 

Fourth-Class

“Parcel Post” For packages 1 to 70 lbs. 

Military Ordinary Mail (MOM).

Goes by surface transportation within CONUS and by air 

transportation overseas. Add MOM to the second-, third-, or fourthclass endorsement on matter having a RDD not allowing sufficient

time for surface transportation. Additional postage is not required. 

Special Services 

Registered 

Provides added protection. Use only if required by law or a directive. 

Slow and expensive. For use only with First-Class and Priority Mail.

Addressing Mail 

Make sure mailing address is correct.

Use of office symbol reduces mail handling time.

Place city, state, and ZIP+4 in the last line of the address. 

Return address is a must. Use your office symbol and ZIP+4.

Rules for Employees 

Have personal mail sent to your home, not the office.

Use personal postage to mail job applications, retirement 

announcements, greeting cards, personal items, etc. 

Tips for Cost Savings

Mailing 7 sheets or less of bond paper,-use letter size envelope. (Limit 

thickness to 1/4” or less when sealed.) 

Manuals, pamphlets, etc., weighting over 4 ozs—mail third-class,

special fourth-class, bulk rate, or bound printed matter rate. 

Mailing several items to one address—cheaper to mail everything in 

one envelope. Check with your mailroom for activities serviced by

consolidated mailings.

Check with your mailroom for activities/agencies within the local area 

that are serviced by activities/agencies couriers—no postage required. 

– 262 –
APPENDIX 1 

THE 

MECHANICS 

OF WRITING 

This appendix covers: 

• A glossary of common grammatical terms. 

• An alphabetical list of punctuation guidelines. 

• Rules on capitalization of words and symbols. 

• Guidelines on using abbreviations and writing numbers in text. 

This is not an all-inclusive style manual. It’s an Air Force quick-reference desktop guide to cure 

your most common trouble spots and to encourage standardization and consistency within the 

Air Force—especially during your professional military education. There are many style manuals

and writers’ guides available today and no two are exactly alike. Other commonly used style 

guides are The Chicago Manual of Style, The Gregg Reference Manual, Air University Style 

Guide for Writers and Editors, US Government Printing Office Style Manual, Writer’s Guide 

and Index to English—not necessarily listed in order of preference. If your organization or 

command has a “preferred” style of using capitals, abbreviations, numerals and compound 

words, use it. If not, this guide is designed to serve that purpose. 

– 263 –
The Tongue and Quill 

... grammar rules

make me queasy 

– 264 – 
GLOSSARY OF

COMMON 

GRAMMATICAL 

 AND WRITING TERMS 

Grammar terminology is useful when we describe and correct problems with writing. Though 

we’ve tried to de-emphasize terminology and teach through examples throughout this book, 

sometimes you need a definition. We’ve tried to emphasize areas that are both commonly used 

and commonly misunderstood, such as the use of modal auxiliaries like can, could, shall, should, 

etc. Punctuation marks are not included in this list; they have a separate section in this 

Appendix. 

“People who are experts in grammar don’t always write well, and many people 

who write well no longer think consciously about grammar ... but when 

something goes wrong in a sentence, a knowledge of grammar helps in 

recognizing the problem and provides a language for discussing it.”

 — H. Ramsey Fowler

– 265 –
The Tongue and Quill 

a/an Use a before consonant sounds and an before vowel sounds <a

historical event, an emergency.> 

Active Voice Shows the subject as the actor. <The girl sang a song> (pages 73-74). 

Adjective Describes or limits a noun or pronoun. It answers “Which one? What 

kind? or How many?” <blue box, short coat, gregarious man, four

stools> 

Adverbs Modifies or limits a verb, adjective or another adverb and answers 

“When? Where? Why? How much? How far? To what degree?” 

<quickly run, very dull, very loudly> 

Conjunctive or Connective Adverb—transition words that often 

appears to connect clauses. <however, therefore, etc.>

Antecedent Noun, phrase or clause to which a pronoun refers or replaces. (pages 99-

100) 

Appositive Word, phrase or clause preceding or renaming a noun. <My dog 

Maggie.> 

Article Small set of words used with nouns to limit or give definiteness to the 

application. <a, an, the> 

Bibliography A list of books, articles and other works used in preparing a manuscript 

or other written product. (See “The Mechanics of Research,” pages 345-

347.) 

Bullets Any punctuation symbol used to emphasize specific items. (See 

“Display Dot” Punctuation Guidelines, pages 289-290.) 

Case Forms that nouns and pronouns take when they fit into different 

functions of the sentence. There are three: 

Nominative—for subjects, predicate nominatives and appositives. <I> 

Objective—for objects and their appositives. <me> 

Possessive—to show ownership, hence adjectival, functions. <my>

Clause A group of related words containing a subject and a verb. 

Conjunctions Connects words, phrases, clauses, or sentences (and, or, but, nor). 

Consonants All letters of the alphabet except the vowels a, e, i, o, and u. In some

words (synergy), the letter y acts as a vowel. 

Glossary An alphabetical list of unfamiliar terms and their definitions. 

Interjection Words used to express emotion or surprise (ah, alas, great, hooray, help, 

etc.) Strong interjections are punctuated with an exclamation point. 

(Wow! That’s profound.) Milder interjections are often set off by 

commas, usually at the beginning of a sentence. <Oh, I guess it wasn’t. 

Ouch, that hurts.> 

– 266 –
Glossary of Common Grammatical and Writing Terms 

Modifier Words or groups of words that limit or describe other words. 

If improperly placed, modifiers can confuse the reader or suggest an 

illogical relationship (see dangling and ambiguous modifiers, page 97). 

Modal Auxiliary Verbs that are used with a principal verb that are characteristically used 

with a verb of predication and that in English differs formally from other 

verbs in lacking -s or -ing forms. 

can Primarily expresses ability; cannot is used to deny permission. 

could Sometimes the past tense of can. <We could see the Big Dipper 

last night.> Otherwise, could expresses possibility, doubt or something 

dependent on unreal conditions. <We could see the Big Dipper if it 

weren’t overcast.> 

may Originally meant “have the power” (compare the noun might). 

Now it means “permission.” Also, may is used to indicate possibility. 

<You may leave if you are finished with your work.> 

May is also used in wishes. <May you recover soon.>

might Sometimes functions as simple past tense of may. <He said he might 

have time to talk to us.> Often it is used to express a more doubtful 

possibility than may does. <He might returned before then.> Might is 

also used after contrary-to-fact conditions. <If I were off today, I might 

go fishing.> 

shall/ Shall expresses futurity in the first person; 

should should does also, but it adds a slight coloring of doubt that the 

action will take place. Notice the difference in meaning in these 

sentences. <I shall be happy to call the VA Medical Center for you. I 

 should be happy to call the VA Medical Center for you.> In indirect 

discourse should replaces the shall of direct discourse. <I shall call at 

once. I said that I should call at once.> Many speakers who use shall in 

the first person use would in preference to should. <I said I would call at 

once.> Should is used to express likelihood. <Sue Sizemore should be 

able to finish on time.> Should expresses obligation. <We should file 

these orders more carefully.>

will/ Will is the common future auxiliary used in the

would second and third persons. In addition it is used with special emphasis to 

express determination. <You will finish by 4 p.m.> Would still indicates 

past time in expressing determination. <You thought you would finish by 

4 p.m.> Would expresses customary action in past time. <Our last 

supervisor would bring us doughnuts every Friday morning.> Would

points to future time, but adding doubt or uncertainty. Notice the 

difference in meaning. <I will if I can. I would if I could.> Would

replaces will in indirect discourse. <He said that he would call.>

must Expresses necessity or obligation. It is somewhat stronger than should. 

 <You must call the director’s office immediately.> Must also expresses 

likelihood. <It must have rained last night.> 

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The Tongue and Quill 

ought Originally the past tense of owe, but now it points to a present or future 

time. Ought expresses necessity or obligation, but with less force. See 

the difference. <We must go. We ought to go.> Ought is nearly the 

equivalent of should. 

dare Originally a modal only, it is now used primarily in negatives or 

questions. <He dare not submit the report in that form. Dare we submit 

the report like this?>

need Not originally a modal auxiliary, need is now used to mean have to. 

<He need only fill out the top form. He need not get upset about the 

delay.> In the meaning “lack,” need is always a regular verb. <He needs 

a little help with this project.>

Equivalents of modals:

be able to Used instead of can or could to indicate the ability as a fact rather than a 

mere potentiality. It is used also to avoid the ambiguity that may result 

from using can to express permission. <He is able to support his 

mother.> 

be to Indicates future events but hints at uncertainty. <He is to have that 

report to us tomorrow.> 

have to Commonly substitutes for must. It is a stronger expression of necessity. 

<You have to have that done.>

Other modals are used in speech, but they are inappropriate in writing. 

had rather instead of would rather

 had better instead of should or ought 

 (In speech, had better is emphatic in threats.) 

have got to instead of have to

Modals are used with the infinitive of the perfect or progressive. 

Can be going. Could have gone. Ought to be going. 

Ought to have gone. 

Nouns Names a person, place, thing, action or abstract idea. <woman, office, 

pencil, game, Ohio, Maxwell AFB, democracy, freedom> 

Abstract Noun—nouns that name qualities rather than material things. 

<love, danger> 

Collective Noun—nouns that are singular in form but plural in meaning; 

names a group of persons or things. <audience, army, company, flock, 

committee, trio> 

Concrete Noun—nouns that can be seen or touched. <table, book>

Proper Noun—nouns that are capitalized and name specific persons, 

places, or things. <Major Palmisano, Ohio, Air War College>

Number Shows the singular or plural of nouns, pronouns, or verbs. 

– 268 –
Glossary of Common Grammatical and Writing Terms 

Object Noun or pronoun that is affected by the verb. <The man read the 

book.> 

Parts of Speech The basic building blocks of language: nouns, pronouns, verbs, adverbs, 

adjectives, prepositions, interjections, and conjunctions

Passive Voice Shows the subject as receiver of the action. <A song was sung by her.>

Person Pronouns that denote the speaker (first person; I, we), the person spoken 

to (second person, you), or the person spoken of (third person; she, they).

Phrases Groups of words without a subject or predicate that function as a unit 

(adjective, adverbial, gerund, or infinitive phases). 

Plagiarism Using someone else’s writing as if it were your own. This serious 

offense can lead to severe professional and legal consequences. If using 

another person’s material, identify the borrowed passage and credit the 

author. (See “The Mechanics of Research” page 342.) 

Predicate Tells what the subject does or what is done to the subject, or the state of 

being the subject is in.

Preposition Shows the relationship between a noun or pronoun to another word in 

the sentence. <by, at, up, down, between, among, through>

Pronouns Substitutes for a noun. Here are three: 

Definite—includes I, you, he, she, it, we, they, and all of their forms. 

Indefinite—includes words like someone, no one, each, anyone, and 

anybody. 

Relative—includes words like who, whom, which, that. 

Sentence Expresses one complete thought with one subject and one verb; either or 

both may be compound. 

Complex Sentence—contains one main clause and at least one 

subordinate clause. <When it rains, it pours.> 

Compound Sentence—contains two or more main clauses and no 

subordinate clauses. <It rains, and it pours.> 

Subject Tells what the sentence is about; the person, place or thing that performs

the action or that has the state of being indicated by the verb. 

Tense Shows the time of the action, condition or state of being expressed. The 

three tenses—past, present, future—can be expressed in the simple, 

perfect, or progressive. 

Verbals Past and present participle forms of the verbs that act as nouns or 

adjectives. There are three: 

Gerund—ends in -ing and functions as a noun. <talking, singing>

Infinitive—simple verb form used as a noun, adjective, or adverb and 

usually preceded by to. <to go, to type>

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The Tongue and Quill 

Participle—used as an adjective and acts as a modifier in present (-ing), 

past (-ed, lost), and perfect (having lost) forms. 

Verbs Expresses action or state of being of the sentence. There are six: 

Transitive—transfers action from the subject to the object. 

Intransitive—transfers no action and is followed by an adverb or 

nothing. 

Linking—acts as an equal sign connecting the subject and the 

complement.

Auxiliary or Helping Verb—verb used with another verb to form voice 

or perfect and progressive tenses. <We have eaten there before.> 

Principal Verb—last verb in a verb phrase. 

Irregular Verb—verbs (see below) that form past tense and past 

participle differently: 

 

 PAST

 PRESENT PAST PARTICIPLE

become became become

 begin began begun

 bet bet bet 

 blow blew blown 

 break broke broken 

 bring brought brought 

 buy bought bought 

 catch caught caught 

 choose chose chosen 

 come came come

 cut cut cut 

 draw drew drawn 

 drink drank drunk 

 drive drove driven

 eat ate eaten

 fly flew flown 

 forgive forgave forgiven 

 freeze froze frozen 

 give gave given 

 grow grew grown 

 keep kept kept

 know knew known 

 ride rode ridden 

 ring rang rung 

 rise rose risen 

 set set set 

 shake shook shaken 

 sing sang sung 

 sink sank sunk 

 speak spoke spoken 

 spin spun spun 

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Glossary of Common Grammatical and Writing Terms 

 steal stole stolen 

 swear swore sworn 

 sweep swept swept 

 swim swam swum

 swing swung swung 

 take took taken

 tear tore torn 

 think thought thought

 throw threw thrown 

 wear wore worn

 weep wept wept

Vowel—The a, e, i, o, and u. In some words, the letter y acts as a vowel. 

– 271 –
The Tongue and Quill 

– 272 –
PUNCTUATION 

GUIDELINES: 

AN 

ALPHABETICAL 

LISTING

Punctuation marks are a writer’s road signs they signal stops starts and pauses 

capitalization also helps writers communicate their meaning to their readers 

Say what?! It’s a jumbled mess, but with some effort you could grasp the writer’s meaning. But 

look how easy it is when the proper punctuation is used. 

Punctuation marks are a writer’s road signs. They signal stops, starts, and pauses. 

Capitalization also helps writers communicate their meaning to their readers. 

Punctuation marks are aids writers use to clearly communicate with others. Improper 

punctuation can confuse the reader or alter the meaning of a sentence. Excessive use of 

punctuation can decrease reading speed and make your meaning difficult to determine. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

OPEN AND CLOSED PUNCTUATION 

Open and closed punctuation: general philosophy. 

Though many grammar rules are relatively clear-cut, there are some gray areas where the experts 

disagree. One area of debate is the issue of “open punctuation” versus “closed punctuation.” 

Open punctuation advocates believe that writers should use only what’s necessary to prevent 

misreading, while closed punctuation advocates are more apt to include punctuation whenever 

the grammatical structure of the material justifies it. 

The following sentence illustrates how different writers might punctuate a particular sentence. 

If used incorrectly they may alter an intended meaning, and if used excessively 

they can decrease reading speed and make your meaning difficult to determine. 

[Open punctuation—the meaning is clear without using all the punctuation 

that’s needed by the grammatical structure.]

If used incorrectly, they may alter an intended meaning, and, if used excessively, 

they can decrease reading speed and make your meaning difficult to determine. 

[Closed punctuation—using all required punctuation does not make meaning 

clearer and may slow reading speed.]

In the Air Force, the general trend is to lean towards open punctuation in these types of cases. If 

you’re confused about where to put commas, sometimes the best solution is to restructure the 

sentence to make the meaning clearer and eliminate the need for extra punctuation: 

If used incorrectly, they may alter an intended meaning; if used excessively, they 

can decrease reading speed and cause confusion. [A slight change in sentence 

structure—fewer words to read and meaning is clear.] 

Open and closed punctuation: punctuating terms in a series. 

So far, so good—much of this sounds reasonable to most people. Unfortunately, there IS one 

area where Air Force writers get conflicting guidance: the use of commas to separate three or 

more parallel words, phrases, or clauses in a series. Here’s the rule and its two variants: 

Use a comma to separate three or more parallel words, phrases, or clauses in a series. 

In closed punctuation, include the comma before the final and, or or nor.

Will you go by car, train, or plane? 

You will not talk, nor do homework, nor sleep in my class. 

In open punctuation, exclude the comma before the final and, or, or nor. 

Will you go by car, train or plane? 

You will not talk, nor do homework nor sleep in my class. 

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Punctuation Guidelines: An Alphabetical Listing 

Previous editions of The Tongue and Quill made a general recommendation to favor open 

punctuation. This recommendation is unchanged, but we’d like to acknowledge three reasons 

why closed punctuation guidelines might be used when punctuating three or more items in a 

series: 

1. Closed punctuation of series is specified in most commercial grammar guides. 

2. Closed punctuation of series is specified in some other Air Force references, including 

the Air University Style Guide. 

3. The additional comma specified in closed punctuation may help clarify your meaning, 

especially when the items in the series are longer phrases and clauses. 

Check to see which approach is preferred for the writing product you’re working on. 

Award packages, performance appraisals, military evaluations, and other spaceconstrained formats typically use open punctuation. Research papers, academic 

publications, and books use closed punctuation. Technically speaking, either approach is 

acceptable, so consider your purpose and audience when deciding how to proceed. 

Always remember that punctuation use is governed by its function: to help communicate 

the writer’s meaning. Use the guidelines in the following section in the manner that best 

allows you to communicate your message to your readers. 

“The only rule that doesn’t have its exception is this one.” 

 — The Quill

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The Tongue and Quill 

APOSTROPHE 

USE AN APOSTROPHE... 

 - to create possessive forms of certain words 

- to form contractions or to stand in for missing letters 

- to form plurals for certain letters and abbreviations 

- to mark a quote within a quote 

- in technical writing to indicate units of measurement

1. Use an apostrophe to create possessive forms of nouns and abbreviations used as nouns. 

a. Add ’s to singular or plural nouns that do not end with an s. 

officer’s rank the oxen’s tails 

ROTC’s building the children’s room

b. Add ’s to singular nouns that end with an s. 

A business’s contract Mr. Jones’s family tree 

My boss’s schedule Marine Corps’s Ball

United States’s policy 

NOTE: This rule applies to most singular proper nouns, including names that end with an s: 

Burn’s poems, Marx’s theories, Jefferson Davis’s home, etc. This rule does not apply to ancient 

proper names that end with an s, which take only an apostrophe: Jesus’ teaching, Moses’ law, 

Isis’ temple, Aristophanes’ play, etc.

c. Add only the apostrophe to plural nouns that end in s or with an s sound, or to 

singular nouns ending with an s where adding an ’s would cause difficulty in 

pronunciation. 

The two businesses’ contracts for righteousness’ sake 

Our bosses’ schedule Officers’ Wives Club; Officers’ Club

d. Add ’s to the final word of compound nouns to show possession.

secretary-treasurer’s report mother-in-law’s car; mothers-in-law’s cars 

attorney general’s book eyewitness’ comment 

e. To show possession for indefinite pronouns (someone, no one, each, anyone, 

anybody, etc.), add ’s to last component of the pronoun. 

someone’s car somebody else’s book

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Punctuation 

f. To show joint possession for two or more nouns, add the apostrophe or ’s to the last 

noun. Add only the apostrophe to plural nouns ending in s and ’s to singular nouns. 

girls and boys’ club Diane and Wayne’s daughters LaDonna, 

aunt and uncle’s house Leah, Lynn, and Lori are ...

g. To show separate possession, place the possession indicators on each noun or 

pronoun identifying a possessor. 

soldiers’ and sailors’ uniforms Mrs. Williams’s and Mr. Smith’s classes 

king’s and queen’s jewels son’s and daughter’s toys

NOTE: Do not use an apostrophe when forming possessive pronouns (ours, theirs, its, his, hers, 

yours). One common mistake is using it’s instead of its. Only use it’s as a contraction of it is. 

Its paw was caught in the trap. It’s a bloody wound. Your savings account requires a minimum balance. The reward was ours to keep.

NOTE: Don’t confuse a possessive form with a descriptive form. 

The Jones survey [a descriptive form: tells what survey you’re talking about]

Jones’ survey [a possessive form: shows to whom the survey belongs]

2. Use an apostrophe to mark omissions or form contractions.

can’t (can not) 

mustn’t (must not) 

don’t (do not)

o’clock 

I’m (I am) 

the Roaring ’20s

I’ve (I have) 

won’t (will not) 

it’s (it is) 

wouldn’t (would not)

jack-o’-lantern 

you’ll (you will) 

let’s (let us) 

ne’er-do-well 

rock ’n’ roll

3. To form plurals of certain letters and abbreviations. Make all individual lowercase letters 

plural by adding ’s and make individual capital letters plural by adding s alone unless confusion 

would result. (For example, apostrophes are used with the plurals of A, I, and U because adding 

an s forms the words As, Is, and Us.) To plural most abbreviations (upper and lowercase), add a 

lowercase s. If the singular form contains an apostrophe, add s to form plural. 

dotting the i’s 

OPRs, EPRs, TRs 

1960s 

S’s, A’s, I’s, U’s 

bldgs (buildings)

Bs, 1s

the three Rs 

B-52s 

six the’s 

ain’ts 

ma’ams

mustn’ts

4. Use apostrophes as single quotation marks for a quote within a quote. 

“Let’s adopt this slogan: ‘Quality first.’” 

5. Use an apostrophe in technical writing to indicate a unit of measurement (use the 

accent mark if the symbol is available). 

a. As a length measure, use to specify the measurement of feet. 

The room measures 16’ by 29’. 

b. As an angle measure, use to specify the measure of minutes (60 minutes = 1 degree). 

NOTE: Angles identifying geographical latitude and longitude are specified in minutes and 

seconds (sixty seconds = 1 minute). When using the apostrophe or accent mark so specify 

minutes, use the quotation ( ” ) or double accent mark specify the measure of seconds. 

The rendezvous coordinates are 35o 40’ 30” N x 60o 20’ 30” W.

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The Tongue and Quill 

ASTERISK 

USE ASTERISKS ... 

1. To refer a reader to footnotes placed at the bottom of a page.* Two asterisks identify a 

second footnote,** and three asterisks*** identify a third footnote. Number the footnotes if you 

have more than three, unless in a literary document number if more than one. 

2. To replace words that are considered unprintable. 

If the camera was present when Smith called Schultz a *****, tonight’s newscast

would have had the longest bleep in TV history.

SPACING WHEN USING AN ASTERISK ... 

• No space before following a word or punctuation mark within sentence or at the end of 

a sentence—unless replacing unprintable words, then one space before.

• One space after following a word or punctuation mark within a sentence. 

• Two spaces after following a punctuation mark at the end of a sentence—unless 

manuscript format and using right justified, then one space after. 

• No space after in a footnote. 

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one 

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable. 

*Asterisk: A mark of punctuation to indicate a footnote. See “spacing.” 

**Use the asterisk with other punctuation as shown here. 

***Number the footnotes if you have more than three—unless a literary document (see “spacing”).

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The Tongue and Quill 

BRACKETS 

USE BRACKETS ... 

1. To clarify or correct material written by others. 

He arrived on the 1st [2d] of June. 

The statue [sic] was added to the book of statutes. 

NOTE: The italicized word sic in brackets tells the reader something is wrong with the word 

immediately in front of the first bracket but the word is reproduced exactly as it appeared in the 

original. 

2. To insert explanatory words, editorial remarks, or phrases independent of the sentence 

or quoted material. 

“Tell them [the students] to report to Wood Auditorium now.” 

The tank-versus-tank battles of Villers-Brettoneux is the last significant event for the 

tank in World War I. [Other accounts of this battle give different versions.] 

3. To indicate you’ve added special emphasis (underline, bold type, all capitals, italics) to 

quoted material when the emphasis was not in the original work. The bracketed material 

may be placed immediately following the emphasized word(s) or at the end of the quotation. 

“She [emphasis added] seemed willing to compromise, but his obstinate attitude prevailed.” 

“Tell them NOW to report to Wood Auditorium. [Emphasis added.]” 

4. To enclose a parenthetical phrase that falls within a parenthetical phrase.

(I believe everyone [including the men] will wear costumes.) 

I believe everyone (including the men) will wear costumes. 

SPACING WHEN USING BRACKETS ... 

—opening 

One space before when parenthetic matter is within a sentence. 

Two spaces before when parenthetic matter follows a sentence (when parenthetic matter starts 

with a capital and closes with its own sentence punctuation)—unless manuscript format and 

using right justified, then one space before. 

No space after. 

—closing 

No space before. 

One space after when parenthetic matter is within a sentence. 

Two spaces after when parenthetic matter is itself a complete sentence and another sentence 

follows—unless manuscript format and using right justified, then one space after. 

No space after if another punctuation mark immediately follows. 

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one 

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable.

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The Tongue and Quill 

COLON 

USE A COLON ... 

1. To separate an introductory statement from explanatory or summarizing material that 

follows when there is no coordinating conjunction or transitional expression. (Capitalize the 

first word of the expression that follows the colon if it is the dominant element and is a complete 

sentence. For additional details, see the “Capitalization” section.) 

Living in base housing has many advantages: People can walk to work, shopping is convenient, 

and there are organized activities for the children. 

The board consists of three officials: a director, an executive director, and a recording secretary. 

2. When a sentence contains an expression such as following or as follows or is followed by 

a list or enumerated items. [Notice the capitalization and punctuation.] 

The new directive achieved the following results: better morale and improved relations. 

Results were as follows: better morale, less work, and more pay. 

Consider these advantages when making your decision:

1. You won’t have to be somewhere at 0800 every day.

2. You can get more involved in community activities. 

3. You can pursue hobbies you haven’t had time for in the last year. 

3. To indicate a full stop before an enumerated or explanatory list. 

There are several possibilities: (1) the position could remain vacant, (2) it could be converted to a 

military position, or (3) another civilian within the organization could be temporarily detailed

to the position. 

4. With a quotation when the word say or a substitute for say has been omitted, when the 

introductory expression is an independent clause, and when the quotation is typed in 

indented form on separate lines from the introductory clause. 

The general turned [and said]: “Who gave that order?” 

The judge restated her ruling [independent clause]: “The defendant will remain in the custody of

the sheriff until the trial begins.” 

The speaker had this to say: “Please understand what I say here today represents my opinion 

alone. I am not here as a representative of the company for which I work.”

The speaker said: 

The words you will hear from this stage today are the words and opinions of one

man—me. I do not come as a representative of my company. I will not answer 

any question that is in any way related to the company for which I work. 

5. To express periods of clock time in figures and to represent the word to in proportions. 

Do not use a colon when expressing time on a 24-hour clock. 

8:30 a.m. 1159 (24-hour-clock time)

1:15 p.m. ratio of 2:1 or 3.5:1 

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Punctuation 

6. When expressing library references to separate title and subtitle, volume and page 

number, city of publication and name of publisher in footnotes, and bibliographies. 

Mail Fraud: What You Can Do About It

10:31-34 (Volume 10, pages 31 to 34) 

New York: MacMillan Company 

DO NOT USE A COLON ... 

1. When the enumerated items complete the sentence that introduces them. [Notice 

punctuation.] 

Liaison officers must 

a. become familiar with the situation,

b. know the mission and 

c. arrange for communications. 

[Not: Liaison officers must:] 

2. When an explanatory series follows a preposition or a verb (except in rule 4 on page 

280). 

The editorial assistants in Publication Systems are Rebecca Bryant, Lisa McDay, and Yuna Braswell. 

[Not: The editorial assistants are:] 

3. To introduce an enumerated list that is a complement or the object of an element in the 

introductory statement. 

Our goals are to (1) learn the basic dance steps, (2) exercise while having fun, and (3) meet new

people. 

[Not: Our goals are to:] 

See Capitalization section for 

more rules on capitalizing 

after a colon. 

4. When the anticipatory expression is followed by 

another sentence. 

The editorial assistants will bring the following items to eat. 

These food items will be heated and served at noon. 

Taco Bake 

tossed salad 

chips 

dip 

SPACING WHEN USING COLONS ... 

• No space before. 

• Two spaces after within a sentence—unless manuscript 

format and using right justified, then one space after.

• No space before or after in expressions of time (8:20 

p.m.) or proportions (2:1).

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the 

end of a sentence. Rather to use one space or two is left up 

to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable.

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The Tongue and Quill 

COMMA 

USE A COMMA ...

1. With the coordinating conjunctions and, but, or, or nor when joining two or more 

independent clauses. 

Right: The art of war is constantly developing, but twentieth-century technology has so 

speeded up the change the military strategist now must run to keep pace. 

Wrong: The rapid expansion of the Air Force ensures a continuing need for qualified college 

graduates to fill existing vacancies, and also ensures ample opportunities for 

advancement. [This example contains only one independent clause with a compound

verb; therefore, no comma is necessary.] 

NOTE: No comma is needed if the sentence has one subject with a compound predicate 

connected with a coordinating conjunction because the second half of the sentence is not an 

independent clause. 

Martha Long received her master’s degree December 2003 and is now pursuing her career. 

I am not only willing to go but also ready to stay a week. 

2. To separate three or more parallel words, phrases, or clauses in a series. 

In open punctuation, exclude the comma before the final and, or or nor. 

Will you go by car, train or plane? [open punctuation]

In closed punctuation, include the comma before the final and, or, or nor. 

You will not talk, nor do homework, nor sleep in my class. [closed punctuation]

NOTE: For longer phrases and clauses in a series, the additional comma specified in 

closed punctuation may help readability. 

Patients are classified as suitable for treatment at the installation, as requiring evacuation to the 

regional hospital, or as fit for duty.

NOTE: The use of etc. is discouraged in running text, but when used, it must be set off with 

commas. Do not use etc. when using e.g., for example or such as. These terms indicate you are 

only giving some examples; therefore, there is no need to imply there could be more. 

We will bake cookies, bread, cupcakes, etc., for the party. 

3. With parallel adjectives that modify the same noun. If the adjectives are independent of 

each other, if the order can be reversed or if and can stand between the words, the adjectives are 

parallel and should be separated by a comma. However, if the first adjective modifies the idea 

expressed by the combination of the second adjective and the noun, do not use a comma. 

a hard, cold winter; a long, hot summer [the summer was long and hot]

a heavy winter overcoat [winter modifies overcoat; heavy modifies winter overcoat]

a traditional political institution [political modifies institution; traditional modifies political institution]

– 282 –
Punctuation 

4. To separate two or more complementary phrases that refer to a single word that follows. 

The coldest, if not the most severe, winter Ohio has had was in 1996. 

5. To set off nonessential or ‘interrupting’ words and phrases. 

a. To set off nonessential words, clauses, or phrases not necessary for the meaning or 

the structural completeness of the sentence. You can tell whether an expression is 

nonessential or essential by trying to omit the expression. If you can omit the expression without 

affecting the meaning or the structural completeness of the sentence, the expression is 

nonessential and should be set off by commas. (For more examples, see page 284.) 

They want to hire Yuna Braswell, who has 10 years of experience, to run the new center. [The 

phrase “who has 10 years of experience” is nonessential information.]

They want to hire someone who has at least 10 years of experience to run the center. [The phrase

“who has at least 10 years of experience” is essential information.] 

There is, no doubt, a reasonable explanation. [This sentence would be complete without “no

doubt.”] 

There is no doubt about her integrity. [This sentence would be incomplete without “no doubt.”]

NOTE: This rule includes interrupting words, phrases, or clauses that break the flow of the 

sentence. 

The faculty and staff, military, and civilian, are invited. 

She is a lieutenant colonel, not a major, and will be our new executive officer. 

The major, a recent promotee, is an experienced pilot. 

b. With transitional words and phrases, such as however, that is (i.e.), namely, 

therefore, for example (e.g.), moreover, consequently, and on the other hand, when

interrupting the flow of the sentence. A comma is normally used after these 

expressions, but the punctuation preceding is dictated by the magnitude of the break in 

continuity. However, when these words or phrases are used to emphasize meaning, do 

not set off with punctuation. 

It is important, therefore, we leave immediately. 

It is therefore vitally important we don’t postpone the trip. 

A. Eaves is highly qualified for the job; i.e., he has 16 years of experience!

Rebecca and Julie say they will attend—that is, if Robert and Lisa are attending. 

Planes from a number of bases (e.g., Andrews, Lackland, Tyndall) will participate in the flyover. 

c. To set off a phrase introduced by accompanied by, along with, and not, as well as, 

besides, except, in addition to, including, plus, not even, rather than, such as, together with, or 

a similar expression when it falls between the subject and the verb. 

The faculty and staff, as well as the students, should be prepared to testify before the panel.

The fifth and sixth graders, plus their parents, will be transported by bus. 

NOTE: When the phrase occurs elsewhere in the sentence, commas may be omitted if the 

phrase is clearly related to the preceding words. 

We agree, Miss Johnson, our policy was badly processed as well as lost in the mail. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

d. With the adverb too (meaning also) when it falls between the subject and verb. Omit 

the comma before too if it occurs at the end of a sentence or clause. 

You, too, can save money by shopping selectively.

You should try to improve your typing too. 

If you want to bring the children too, we’ll have room. 

e. To set off nonessential appositives. An appositive is a word or phrase appearing next 

to a noun that identifies it and is equivalent to it. If the appositive is nonessential, set it off 

by commas. If essential or restrictive in nature, do not set it off by commas. 

Our cost analyst, Mrs. Sherri Thomas, will handle the details. [In this hypothetical example, we 

have only one cost analyst, so Mrs. Thomas is “nonessential.” If we eliminate her name, the 

meaning of the sentence would not change.]

The battleship Pennsylvania was taken out of mothballs today. [Pennsylvania is “essential” to the 

sentence because there is more than one battleship in mothballs.] 

Their daughter Julie won the contest. The other daughters were really annoyed. [Since they have 

more than one daughter her name is essential to the sentence.] 

Edward shares a house with his wife Esther in Prattville, Alabama. [Strictly speaking, Esther

should be set off by commas because he can have only one wife and giving her name is 

nonessential information; however, because the words wife and Esther are so closely related 

and usually spoken as a unit, commas may be omitted.]

f. To set off the title, position, or organization after a person’s name or name 

equivalent. (Some cases under this rule are appositives; other cases are not.) 

Lieutenant General Don Lamontagne, Commander of Air University, will speak at ACSC 

this Thursday. 

The Commander, 42d Air Base Wing, is responsible for ... 

g. To set off long phrases denoting a residence or business connection immediately 

following a name. 

Lieutenant Colonel Fernando Ordoñez, of the Peruvian air force in Lima, Peru, will be here 

tomorrow. 

Lt Col Ordoñez of Lima, Peru, will be here tomorrow. [The comma is omitted before of to avoid 

too many breaks in a short phrase.]

6. To set off introductory elements. 

a. With introductory elements that begin a sentence and come before the subject and 

verb of the main clause. The comma may be omitted if the introductory phrase is five words or

less except when numbers occur together. If you choose to use a comma following a short 

introductory phrase, do so consistently throughout the document. 

In 1923, 834 cases of measles were reported in that city. 

In 1913 the concept of total war was unknown. 

Of all the desserts I love, my favorite is the fruit trifle.

Since the school year had already begun, we delayed the curriculum change. 

b. After introductory words such as yes, no, or oh. Yes, I’ll do it. 

Oh, I see your point. 

7. To set off explanatory dates, addresses and place names. 

The change of command, 1 October 1996, was the turning point. 

The British prime minister lives at 10 Downing Street, London, England. 

– 284 –
Punctuation 

NOTE: Use two commas to set off the name of a state, county, or country when it directly 

follows the name of a city except when using a ZIP code. When including the ZIP code 

following the name of the state, drop the comma between the two (see Envelope section), but use 

one after the ZIP code number if there is additional text. 

We shipped it to 2221 Edgewood Road, Millbrook AL 36054-3644, but it hasn’t been 

received yet.

8. To set off statements such as he said, she replied, they answered, and she announced. 

She said, “Welcome to the Chamber of Commerce. May I help you?” 

She replied, “I have an appointment with Lt Col Rick Jenkins at 10 a.m.” 

NOTE: If a quotation functions as an integral part of a sentence, commas are unnecessary. 

They even considered “No guts, no glory!” as their slogan. 

9. To set off names and titles used in direct address. 

No, sir, I didn’t see her.

Linda McBeth, you’re not changing jobs, are you?

And that, dear friends, is why you’re all here. 

10. With afterthoughts (words, phrases or clauses added to the end of a sentence). 

It isn’t too late to get tickets, is it? Send them as soon as possible, please. 

NOTE: The word too does not require a comma if located at the end of a sentence—see Rule 5d. 

11. In the following miscellaneous constructions: 

a. To indicate omission of words in repeating a construction. 

We had a tactical reserve; now, nothing. [The comma replaces we have.]

b. Before for used as a conjunction. 

She didn’t go to the party, for she cannot stand smoke-filled rooms. 

c. To separate repeated words. 

That was a long, long time ago. 

Well, well, look who’s here. 

d. With titles following personal names. (Jr. and Sr. are set off by commas; 2d, 3d, II, 

and III are not.) 

Lee B. Walker, Sr. 

Henry Ford II

William Price, Esq

James Stokes 3d 

In text: Lee B. Walker, Sr., is ... 

NOTE: When you must show possession drop the comma following Jr. and Sr. 

Lee Walker, Sr.’s car is ... 

e. When names are reversed. 

Adams, Angie Middleton, Mary 

Baldwin, Sherwood, Jr. Parks, James, III 

Brown, Carolyn Price, William, Esq

Jones, Kevin Walker, Lee B., Sr. 

– 285 –
The Tongue and Quill 

f. With academic degrees. 

Scott H. Brown, PhD 

James Parks III, MBA 

In text: Houston Markham, EdD, will ... 

g. To prevent confusion or misreading. 

To John, Smith was an honorable man. 

For each group of 20, 10 were rejected. 

Soon after, the meeting was interrupted abruptly. 

SPACING WHEN USING COMMAS ... 

• No space before. 

• One space after, unless a closing quotation mark immediately follows the comma. 

• No space after within a number. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

DASH 

USE AN EM DASH (—) ... 

1. To indicate a sudden break or abrupt change in thought. 

He is going—no, he’s turning back. 

Our new building should be—will be—completed by June 2004. 

2. To give special emphasis to the second independent clause in a compound sentence. 

Our new, but used, pickup truck is great—it’s economical too!

You’ll double your money with this plan—and I’ll prove it! 

3. To emphasize single words. 

Girls—that’s all he ever thinks about! 

They’re interested in one thing only—profit—nothing else matters. 

4. To emphasize or restate a previous thought. 

One day last week—Monday, I think—Congress finally voted on the amendment. 

5. Before summarizing words such as these, they, and all when those words summarize a 

series of ideas or list of details. 

A tennis racket, swimsuit and shorts—these are all you’ll need for the weekend.

Faculty, staff and students—all are invited.

6. In place of commas to set off a nonessential element requiring special emphasis. 

There’s an error in one paragraph—the second one. 

We will ensure all students—as well as faculty members—are informed of the 

Chief of Staff’s visit. 

7. To set off a nonessential element when the nonessential element contains internal 

commas. 

Certain subjects—American government, calculus and chemistry—are required courses. 

8. Instead of parentheses when a nonessential item requires strong emphasis (dashes 

emphasize; parentheses de-emphasize). 

Call Lieutenant Colonels Kessler, Sims, and Forbes—the real experts—and get their opinion. 

9. In place of a colon for a strong, but less formal, break in introducing explanatory words, 

phrases or clauses. 

Our arrangement with the Headquarters USAF is simple—we provide the camera-ready copy and they

handle the printing and distribution. 

– 287 –
Punctuation 

10. With quotation marks. Place the dash outside the closing quotation mark when the 

sentence breaks off after the quotation and inside the closing quotation mark to indicate the 

speaker’s words have broken off abruptly. 

If I hear one more person say, “See what I’m saying!?”— 

Thomas Hardy said, “When I get to 25 Barberry Street, I’ll —” 

11. With a question mark or an exclamation mark: 

a. When a sentence contains a question or exclamation that is set off by dashes, put 

the appropriate punctuation mark before the closing dash. 

I’ll attend Friday’s meeting—is it being held at the same place?—but I’ll have to leave early for another 

appointment. 

He’s busy now, sir—wait, don’t go in there!—I’ll call you when he’s free. 

b. When a sentence abruptly breaks off before the end of a question or exclamation, 

put the end punctuation mark immediately following the dash. 

Shall I do it or —?

Look out for the —! 

USE AN EN DASH (–) ... 

12. Before the source of a quotation or credit line in typed material (use an en dash in 

printed material).

The ornaments of a home are the friends who frequent it.

– Anonymous

13. To indicate inclusive numbers (dates, page numbers, time) when not introduced by the 

word from or between. 

Some instructions are on pages 15–30 of this article and from pages 3 to 10 in the attached brochure. 

My appointment is 0800–0900. I will be there between 0745 and 0800. 

She worked in the Pentagon from 1979 to 1996 and she said the 1990–1996 period went by quickly.

14. In a compound adjective when one element has two words or a hyphenated word. 

New York–London flight Air Force–wide changes quasi-public–quasi-judicial

 body 

SPACING WHEN USING DASHES ... 

• No space before or after an em dash (—) or en dash (–) within a sentence. 

• Two spaces after the em dash at the end of a sentence that breaks off abruptly (rule 10)—

unless manuscript format and using right justified, then one space after. 

• No space before, between or after the em dash when inputting material with a typewriter. An 

em dash is made using two hyphens (--) when typed. 

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one 

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable. 

“All generalizations are false to a certain extent–including this one.” 

— The Quill

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The Tongue and Quill 

DISPLAY DOT 

USE A DISPLAY DOT OR BULLET*... 

To emphasize specific items in either complete or incomplete sentences that are parallel in 

grammatical structure. 

1. Use display dots when one item is not more important than the others, and the items do 

not show a sequence. (If the items show a sequence, a numbered list is recommended.)

2. Capitalize the first word of each item in the list when a complete sentence 

introduces them. (The complete sentence may end with either a period or a colon.) 

The prospect for growing drug abuse worldwide can be correlated with the prevalence 

of the following ingredients: 

• An awareness of drugs. 

• Access to them. 

• The motivation to use them. 

The Coast Guard is a multimission agency with broad, general mission areas in the maritime arena. 

• Safety. 

• Environmental protection. 

• Law enforcement. 

• Political-military. 

3. Use a period (or other appropriate end punctuation) after each item in a vertical list 

when at least one of the items is a complete sentence. 

After listening intently to the defense attorney’s closing remarks, the jury was convinced of 

three things: 

• Witnesses lied. 

• False evidence had been presented. 

• The defendant deserved a new trial. 

Two questions continually present themselves to commanders: 

• What is actually happening?

• What (if anything) can I or should I do about it?

__________________________ 

*A “bullet” is a generic term for any graphical symbol used to emphasize different items in a list. Display dots,

squares, dashes, and arrows are the most common symbols used for this purpose, but today’s software makes any

number of designs possible. Regardless of your choice of bullet graphic, the above guidelines will help readability.

– 289 –
Punctuation 

4. When the list completes a sentence begun in the introductory element, omit the final 

period unless the items are separated by other punctuation. 

There is a tendency to speak of the commander, but there are, in fact, many interrelated 

commanders, and each commander uses a separate command and control process to 

• make information decisions about the situation, 

• make operational decisions about actions to be taken, and 

• cause them to be executed within a structure established by prior organizational 

 decisions. 

5. A colon can be used to indicate a full stop before a list. A colon is often used with 

expressions such as the following items or as follows. 

Consider the following advantages when making your decision:

1. You won’t have to be somewhere at 0800 every day.

2. You can get more involved in community activities. 

3. You can pursue hobbies you haven’t had time for in the last year. 

6. Do not use a colon when the listed items complete the sentence that introduces them. 

Liaison officers must 

• become familiar with the situation,

• know the mission, and 

• arrange for communications. [Not: Liaison officers must:]

The editorial assistants in Publication Systems are 

• Rebecca Bryant, 

• Lisa McDay, and 

• Yuna Braswell. [Not: The editorial assistants are:] 

SPACING WHEN USING DISPLAY DOTS AND BULLETS ...

• No space before. 

• Two spaces after—unless manuscript format and using right justified, then one space after. 

• Hang indent all remaining lines. 

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one 

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

ELLIPSIS 

USE AN ELLIPSIS ... 

1. To indicate a pause or faltering speech within a quoted sentence or at the end of a 

sentence that is deliberately incomplete. 

“I ... I don’t know ... I mean I don’t know if I can go.” 

Can you tell me what famous document begins with “Four score and seven ...”?

2. To indicate an omission of a portion of quoted material. 

“Four score and ... our ... brought forth....” 

a. Use four periods (ending period plus ellipsis) to indicate an omission at the end of a 

sentence. 

Work measurement is the volume of work.... 

NOTE: If quotation is intended to trail off, omit ending punctuation. 

He could have easily saved the situation by ... But why talk about it. 

b. When a sentence ends with a question mark or exclamation point, use an ellipsis 

(three periods) and the ending punctuation mark. 

What work measurement tool was used to determine...?

c. To indicate one or more sentences or paragraphs are omitted between other 

sentences, use the ellipsis immediately after the terminal punctuation of the preceding 

sentence. 

In the last few years, we have witnessed a big change in the age groups of America’s violence.... How far 

and wide these changes extend, we are afraid to say.

d. When a fragment of a sentence is quoted within another sentence, it isn’t necessary to 

signify the omission of words before or after the fragment. 

Technicians tell us it “requires a steady stream of accurate and reliable reports” to keep the system

operating at peak performance. 

SPACING WITH PUNCTUATION MARKS ... 

• No space between the three periods within the ellipsis itself. 

• One space before and after within a sentence. 

• No space before when an opening quotation mark precedes the ellipsis. 

• Two spaces after ellipsis with a period, question mark or exclamation point at the end of a 

sentence—unless manuscript format and using right justified, then one space after. 

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one 

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable.

– 291 –
The Tongue and Quill 

EXCLAMATION MARK 

USE AN EXCLAMATION MARK ... 

1. At the end of a sentence or elliptical expression (condensed sentence, key words left out) 

to express strong emotion (surprise, disbelief, irony, dissent, urgency, amusement, 

enthusiasm). 

Congratulations on your new son!

I suppose you consider that another “first”!

Fantastic show! 

2. In parentheses within a sentence to emphasize a particular word. 

He lost 67(!) pounds in 6 months. 

She said what(!)?

ALONG WITH OTHER PUNCTUATION ... 

3. When an exclamation is set off by dashes within a sentence, use an exclamation mark 

before the closing dash.

Our women’s club—number 1 in the community!—will host a party for underprivileged children.

4. Use an exclamation mark inside a closing parenthesis of a parenthetical phrase when the 

phrase requires an exclamation mark and the sentence does not end with an exclamation 

mark. 

Jerry’s new car (a 2004 Nissan Maxima!) was easily financed. 

The football game (Alabama versus Auburn) is always a super game! 

5. An exclamation mark goes inside a closing quotation mark only when it applies to the 

quoted material. 

Lt Col Smith said, “Those rumors that I’m going to retire early simply must stop!” 

You’re quite mistaken—Jane Palmisano clearly said, “Peachtree Grill at 1215”! 

Mark and Todd have both told him, “You had no right to say, ‘Kimberly will be glad to teach 

Acquisition’ without checking with her first!” 

SPACING WITH PUNCTUATION MARKS ... 

• Two spaces after the end of a sentence—unless manuscript format and using right justified, 

then one space after.

• No space after when another punctuation mark immediately follows (closing 

quotation mark, closing parenthesis, closing dash). 

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence.

Rather to use one space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either 

way is acceptable. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

HYPHEN 

USE A HYPHEN ... 

1. When dividing a word at the end of a line. When in doubt about the proper place to divide 

a word, consult a dictionary and apply the guidelines on page 297. 

Use a hyphen to indicate the continuation of a word divided at the end of a line. 

2. To join unit modifiers. When you abbreviate the unit of measure, omit the hyphen. 

4-hour sortie, 4 hr sortie long-term loan 

rust-resistant cover 24-gallon tank, 24 gal. tank

3. When expressing the numbers 21 through 99 in words and in adjective compounds with 

a numerical first element. 

Twenty-one people attended. 

Twenty-one people attended with at least 2 that failed to show up. 

Eighty-nine or ninety miles from here there’s an outlet mall. 

I kept their 3-year-old child while they were away. 

There will be a 10-minute delay. 

4. To join single capital letters to nouns or participles. 

U-boat H-bomb X-height U-turn

T-shirt T-bone D-mark E-mail 

5. To indicate two or more related compound words having a common base (suspended 

hyphen). 

It will be a 12- to 15-page document. 

The cruise line offers 2-, 3-, and 7-day cruises at special group rates. 

Long- and short-term money rates are available. 

6. To join capital letter(s) and numbers in system designators and numerical identifiers. 

F-117 B-1B F-16

KC-10 Su-24TK T-38

– 293 –
Punctuation 

7. To form compound words and phrases. Some compound words are written as two words 

(post office, air brake, Mother Nature, fellow traveler), some as one (manpower, masterpiece, 

aircraft), some as a combination of words and joined by hyphens (father-in-law, great-uncle, 

secretary-treasurer, governor-general, men-of-war, grant-in-aid, mother-of-pearl), and some

multiple-word compounds that include a preposition and a description (jack-of-all-trades, but 

flash in a pan and master of none). There’s a growing trend to spell compound words as one 

word once widely accepted and used. However, sometimes the way you use a compound word 

or phrase will dictate how you write it—as one word, with a hyphen, or as two separate words. 

When in doubt, consult an up-to-date dictionary or treat as two words if the guidelines on the 

next pages don’t fit. 

a. Use a hyphen with words and phrases that are combined to form a unit modifier 

immediately preceding the word modified (except with an adverb ending in ly). Do not 

hyphenate these phrases when they follow the noun. 

an up-to-date report; this report is up to date; a $500-a-week salary; a salary of $500 a week

decision-making process; the process of decision making; red-faced man; the man with the red face 

X-rated movies; movies that are X rated; the X-ray equipment; the X-ray showed

a well-known author; the author is well known

a first-come, first-served basis; on the basis of first come, first served 

a highly organized group; a completely balanced meal

b. Use a hyphen when two or more proper names are combined to form a one-thought 

modifier and when two adjectives are joined by the word and or or. 

Montgomery-Atlanta-Washington flight life-and-death situation 

black-and-white terms cause-and-effect hypothesis 

yes-or-no answer go-no-go decision

c. Use a hyphen when spelling the word solid creates a homonym. 

re-cover [cover again]; recover [to regain] re-creation [create again]; recreation [play] 

re-count [count again]; recount [to detail] pre-position [position again]; preposition 

re-create [create again]; recreate [refresh] [word that forms a phrase]

un-ionized [substance]; unionized [to organize] re-mark [mark again]; remark [say]

re-sign [sign again]; resign [quit] multi-ply [as in fabric]; multiply [arithmetic function]

re-start [start again]; restart [to start anew] co-op [cooperative]; coop [to confine] 

re-treat [treat again]; retreat [withdraw] 

d. Use a hyphen to avoid doubling a vowel when the last letter of the prefix “anti,” 

“multi,” and “semi” is the same as the first letter of the word. Also, use a hyphen when the 

second element is a capitalized word or a number. 

anti-inflammatory; anti-Nazi; antiaircraft semi-icing; semi-Americanized; semiofficial 

multi-industry; multielement; multimillion pre-1914, post-World War II; ultra-German 

e. Use a hyphen to join duplicate prefixes. 

re-redirect sub-subcommittee super-superlative 

– 294 –
The Tongue and Quill 

DO NOT USE A HYPHEN ... 

f. In compounds formed from unhyphenated proper nouns. 

Methodist Episcopal Church Southeast Asian country Mobile Bay cruise 

g. Between independent adjective preceding a noun. 

hot water pipe big gray cat a fine old southern gentleman 

h. In a compound adjective when the first element of a color term modifies the second. 

sea green gown grayish blue car 

i. In a compound adjective formed with chemical names. 

carbon dioxide formula hydrochloric acid liquid 

j. In a unit modifier with a letter or number as its second element. 

Attachment 3 pages Article 3 procedures 

k. In a unit modifier enclosed in quotation mark unless it is normally a hyphenated 

term. Quotation marks are not to be used in lieu of a hyphen. 

“blue sky” law “tie-in” sale 

“good neighbor” policy right-to-work law

l. In a unit modifier to set off some prefixes and suffixes (ante, anti, bi, bio, co, counter, 

extra, infra, inter, intra, like, macro, meta, micro, mid, multi, neo, non, over, post, per, pre, 

pro, proto, pseudo, sub, re, semi, socio, super, supra, trans, ultra, un, under), BUT THERE 

ARE SOME EXCEPTIONS. 

All words are hyphenated when used as an adjective compound. 

all-inclusive background all-out war all-powerful leader

Best, better, full, high, ill, least, lesser, little, low, lower, middle, and upper compounds 

are hyphenated when used as an adjective before a noun; drop the hyphen when used 

following the noun. 

ill-advised action; action is ill advised best-loved book; the book was best loved

lesser-regarded man; he was the lesser little-understood man; the man was 

 regarded little understood

full-length dress; the dress is full length least-desirable man; the man was least 

 desirable 

upper-crust society; she is of the better-prepared man; the man was better 

 upper crust prepared

high-level water; water is at the high level middle-class house; he lives with the middle 

 class 

Cross and half words are hyphenated, but some aren’t. Check your dictionary and, if not 

listed, hyphenate. 

crosswalk cross-pollination cross section

halfback half-dollar half sister 

Elect words are hyphenated, except when they consist of two or more words. 

mayor-elect county assessor elect president-elect 

– 295 –
Punctuation 

Ex (meaning former) words are discouraged in formal writing; former is preferred. 

However, when you use ex in this context, use a hyphen. 

ex-governor ex-AU commander ex-convict

Fold words are usually one word, except when used with numerals. 

25-fold tenfold twofold 

Like words are usually one word except when the first element is a proper name, words of three 

or more syllables, compound words, or to avoid tripling a consonant. 

gridlike lifelike Grecian-like 

mystery-like squeeze-bottle-like wall-like 

Mid, Post, and Pre words are usually one word except when the second element begins with a 

capital letter or is a number. 

midstream post-Gothic preeminent 

mid-June postgame pre-Civil War 

mid-1948 post-1900s pre-1700s 

Non words are usually one word except when the second element begins with a capital letter or 

consists of more than one word. 

nonattribution noncommissioned officer nonsurgical

non-Latin-speaking people non-civil-service position non-European

non-line of sight 

Over and under words are usually one word except when the compound contains the word the. 

over-the-counter drug under-the-table kick overbusy employee 

overdone steak underdone steak understaffed office 

Quasi words are always hyphenated. 

quasi-judicial quasi-public quasi-legislative 

Self as a prefix is joined to the root word by a hyphen. When self is the root word or is 

used as a suffix, do not use a hyphen. 

self-made selfish herself 

self-respect selfless itself 

self-explanatory selfsame himself 

Vice compounds are hyphenated except when used to show a single office or title. 

a vice president; vice-presidential candidate vice admiral; vice-admiralty; viceroy 

the vice-consul; vice-consulate’s office vice-chancellor; vice-chancellorship 

Well compounds are hyphenated when used as an adjective before a noun; drop the 

hyphen when used following the noun. Well used as a compound noun is always 

hyphenated. 

well-made suit; suit was well made the well-being of the family; consider her well-being

well-known author; author is well known the well-bred dogs; the dogs were well bred

Wide words are usually one word except when long and cumbersome and when follows 

the noun. 

worldwide university-wide; the virus is university wide

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The Tongue and Quill 

SPACING WHEN USING A HYPHEN ... 

• No space before or after to combine words, punctuation and/or numbers. 

• One space after when dividing a word (see rule 1) or using suspended hyphen (rule 5). 

DIVIDING WORDS AND PARAGRAPHS 

WORDS 

1. Never divide the last word on the first or last lines on a page; do not hyphenate the last 

words on two consecutive lines; avoid hyphenating more than five lines each page. 

2. Never divide monosyllables (one-syllable words). [friend] 

3. Never divide words at a vowel that forms a syllable in the middle of the word. 

[preju-/dice, not prej-/udice] 

4. Never divide words at a final syllable whose only vowel sound is that of a syllabic “I.” 

[prin-/cipal, not princi-/pals]

5. Never divide words of five or fewer letters even when they contain more than one syllable. 

[not i-/deal or ide-/a] 

6. Never divide words by putting a single letter on a line. [not a-/round nor militar-/y] 

7. Never further divide words that contain a hyphen—break these words at the built-in hyphen. 

[self-/control, not self-con-/trol]

8. Divide words containing double consonants between the consonants only when they do not 

end root words. [permit-/ted; spell-/ing] 

9. When possible, divide words after the prefix or before the suffix rather than within the 

root word or within the prefix or suffix. [applic-/able, not applica-/ble; valu-/able, 

not val-/uable; pre-/requisite, not prereq-/uisite]. 

10. Never divide contractions. [not can’/t nor won/’t] 

11. When necessary to divide a name, carry over only the surname (never separate a first name

from a middle initial, an initial from a middle name or initials used in place of a first name). 

[Annette G./Walker; Ethel/Hall; R. A./Bowe]

12. Divide surnames, abbreviations and numbers only if they already contain a hyphen, and then 

divide only at the hyphen. [Johnson-/Roberts, not John-/son-Roberts; AFL-/CIO, not

YM/CA; 249-/3513, not $55,-/000]. 

13. A person’s rank or title should be on the same line with first name or initials, when possible. 

[Miss Duncan/Phillips; Dr. Louise/Miller-Knight; Major Larry/Lee] 

14. When it’s necessary to divide a date, separate the year from month—do not split the month 

from the day. [14 September/2004] 

PARAGRAPHS 

1. Never divide a paragraph of four or fewer lines. 

2. When dividing a paragraph of five or more lines, never type less than two lines on either 

page. 

– 297 –
The Tongue and Quill 

ITALICS 

USE ITALICS ... 

1. In printed material to distinguish the titles of whole published works: books, 

pamphlets, bulletins, periodicals, newspapers, plays, movies, symphonies, poems, operas, 

essays, lectures, sermons, legal cases, and reports. 

The Chicago Manual of Style The Phantom of the Opera 

AFM 33-326, Preparing Official Communications Star Trek 

The Montgomery Advertiser United States Government v. Bill Gates 

 

NOTE: When you use these titles in the plural, set the plural ending in Roman type. 

There were five Journals and two Times on the shelf.

2. In place of the underscore to distinguish or givbe greater prominence to certain words, 

phrases, or sentences. Both the underscore and italics are acceptable, but not in the same

document. Use sparingly. 

Air Force doctrine has been the subject of much debate. 

Air Force doctrine has been the subject of much debate. 

3. In printed material to distinguish the names of ships, submarines, aircraft, and spacecraft. 

Italicize the name only, not initials or numbers preceding or following the name. (In typed 

material, the underscore is generally used for this purpose.) Do not italicize the class or make of 

ships, aircraft and spacecraft; and names of space programs. 

USS America Nautilus B-1B Lancer Friendship 7 

frigate U-boat Concorde Columbia

Spruance KILO Boeing 707 Gemini II

4. In typed material to distinguish foreign words not part of the English language. Once an 

expression has become part of the English language (in the dictionary), italics is unnecessary. 

blitzkrieg Luftwaffe vis-à-vis com d ́étet

vakfiye poêle le cheval Perestroika

5. When punctuation (except parentheses and brackets) marks immediately follow the 

italicized word, letter character, or symbol. 

What is meant by random selection? Point: one-twelfth of a pica 

Luke 4:16a; see 12b! 

 

“Few men are lacking in capacity, but they fail because they are lacking in application.” 

 — Calvin Coolidge 

– 298 –
The Tongue and Quill 

PARENTHESES 

USE PARENTHESES ... 

1. To enclose explanatory material (a single word, a phrase or an entire sentence) that is 

independent of the main thought of the sentence. 

The ACSC students (542 of them) will begin classes the second week of June. 

The results (see figure 3) were surprising. 

2. To set off nonessential elements when commas would be inappropriate or confusing and 

dashes would be too emphatic. 

Mr. Henry Anderson, Jr., is the general manager of the Montgomery (Alabama) branch. 

[Parentheses are clearer than commas when a city-state expression is used as an adjective.] 

All the classes will meet three days a week (Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays). [Parentheses are 

used in place of commas because the nonessential element contains commas.] 

I suggest you contact Edward Clinton (a true professional) for his recommendation. [Parentheses

used in place of dashes to de-emphasize the nonessential element.] 

Contact Ms. Louise Robinson—the manager of the house in Tuscaloosa—and ask her if a room is

still available. [Dashes are used in place of parentheses for emphasis.] 

3. To enclose enumerating letters or numerals within a sentence. 

Our goals are to (1) reduce the number of curriculum hours, (2) eliminate the 90-minute lunch period, and

(3) reduce the number of personnel needed to accomplish the mission. 

Also, include the following when you file your medical costs: (a) hotel charges, (b) meal costs (including 

gratuities), and (c) transportation costs. 

4. To enclose numbers or letters identifying certain sections of an outline. In outlining, if 

you have a paragraph numbered 1, you must have a paragraph numbered 2; if you have a 

subparagraph a, you must have a b subparagraph. 

1. xxxxx

a. xxxxx 

(1) xxxxx 

(a) xxxxx

5. To enclose a nickname or a descriptive expression when it falls between a person’s first 

and last names. However, when it precedes or replaces a person’s first name, simply capitalize 

it. 

George Herman (Babe) Ruth Stonewall Jackson 

Major William F. (Clark) Kent the Iron Duke

 

“And what he greatly thought, he nobly dared.” 

 — Homer 

– 299 –
Punctuation 

ALONG WITH OTHER PUNCTUATION ... 

6. If an item in parentheses falls within a sentence, place comma, semicolon, colon, or dash 

outside (never before) the closing parenthesis.

I’ll see you later (probably Friday), but remember to collect your money. 

I’ll attend the meeting (as I said I would); however, you’ll have to go to the next one as I have

another commitment.

She’s passionate about two important issues (and strives to support them): homeless children and 

a clean environment. 

7. Use a period before a closing parenthesis only when the parenthetical sentence stands on 

its own or when the closing parenthesis is preceded by an abbreviation containing 

punctuation. 

The results were surprising. (See the analysis at atch 2.) 

Many heights of flowers (e.g., 6 in., 12 in., 36 in.) will be featured in the show. 

8. Put a question mark or quotation mark before a closing parenthesis only when it applies 

to the parenthetical item and the sentence ends in a different punctuation. 

The Pentagon (you’ve been there, haven’t you?) is a fascinating office building. 

Doris Williams said she would go. (In fact, her exact words were, “Go golfing? You bet! Every 

chance I get!”) 

9. When using an exclamation mark or question mark to emphasize or draw attention to a 

particular word within a sentence. 

You call this fresh(!) food.

They said they will buy us four(?) machines. 

SPACING WHEN USING PARENTHESES ...

—opening 

• One space before when parenthetic matter is within a sentence. 

• No space before when using exclamation or question marks to emphasize or draw attention to 

a particular word within a sentence. 

• Two spaces before when parenthetic matter follows a sentence (when parenthetic matter starts 

with a capital and closes with its own sentence punctuation)—unless manuscript format and 

using right justified, then one space before.

• No space after. 

—closing 

• No space before. 

• One space after when parenthetic matter is within a sentence. 

• Two spaces after when parenthetic matter is itself a complete sentence and another sentence 

follows—unless manuscript format and using right justified, then one space after.

• No space after if another punctuation mark immediately follows. 

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one 

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable.

– 300 –
The Tongue and Quill 

PERIOD 

USE A PERIOD ... 

1. To end declarative and imperative sentences. 

His work is minimally satisfactory. 

Don’t be late. 

2. To end an indirect question or a question intended as a suggestion or otherwise not 

requiring an answer. 

She wanted to know how to do it.

He asked what the job would entail. 

Tell me how they did it. 

3. With certain abbreviations. Most abbreviations today are written without punctuation (see 

Abbreviations, pages 309-315). 

Ms. Miss [not an Sr. no. [number; could be confused 

 abbreviation] with the word no] 

Mr. Dr. e.g. in. [inch; could be confused

with the word in] 

Mrs. Jr. i.e. etc. 

4. To form ellipses (three periods that indicate a pause or faltering speech within a 

sentence, or an omission of a portion of quoted material). (See Ellipsis on page 291.) 

5. In vertical lists and outlines. 

a. Use a period after each item in a vertical list when at least one of the items is a 

complete sentence. When the list completes a sentence begun in the introductory element, 

omit the final period unless the items are separated by other punctuation. 

After listening intently to the defense attorney’s closing remarks, the jury was convinced of three things: 

(1) Witnesses lied.

(2) False evidence had been presented. 

(3) The defendant deserved a new trial. 

After listening to the defense attorney’s closing remarks, the jury was convinced that 

(1) several witnesses had perjured themselves, 

(2) false evidence was presented and 

(3) the defendant deserved a new trial. 

The following aircraft were lined up on the runway: 

B-1B

T-38 

F-16 

F-117

– 301 –
Punctuation 

b. Use periods after numbers and letters in an outline when the letters and figures are 

not enclosed in parentheses. If you have a numbered 1 paragraph, you must have a numbered 

2; if you have a subparagraph a, you must have a b subparagraph; and so on. For Air Force 

publications, follow guidance in AFI 33-360, Volume 1. 

1. Õoutline sample 

2. 

a. 

b. 

(1) 

(2) 

(a) 

(b) 

ALONG WITH OTHER PUNCTUATION ... 

6. With parenthetical phrases. Place a period inside the final parenthesis only when the item

in the parentheses is a separate sentence or when the final word in the parenthetical phrase is an 

abbreviation that is followed by a period. 

I waited in line for 3 hours. (One other time I waited for over 5 hours.) 

One other committee member (namely, Dr. Glen Spivey, Sr.) plans to vote against the amendment. 

7. With quotation marks with the period placed inside a closing quotation mark. 

She said, “I’ll go with you.” 

8. With a dash only when used with an abbreviation that contains periods. 

Tony Lamar’s desk is 48 in.—his is the only odd-sized desk. 

SPACING WHEN USING A PERIOD... 

• Two spaces after the end of a sentence—unless manuscript format and using right justified, 

then on space after. 

• No space before unless an ellipsis (see Ellipses, page 291). 

• One space after an abbreviation with a period within a sentence. 

• No space after a decimal point or before within two numbers. 

• No space after when another punctuation mark immediately follows (closing quotation mark, 

closing parenthesis, comma following an “abbreviation” period). 

• Two spaces after a number or letter that indicates an enumeration (rule 5b). 

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one 

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable. 

“The pen is mightier than the sword.” 

 — Shakespeare 

 “... unless you’re on one.” 

 — The Quill 

– 302 –
The Tongue and Quill 

QUESTION MARK

USE A QUESTION MARK ... 

1. To indicate the end of a direct question. 

Did he go with you?

Will you be able to attend?

2. With elliptical (shortened) questions and to express more than one question within a 

sentence. 

You rang? For what purpose?

Was the speaker interesting? Convincing? Well versed?

Who approved the sale? When? To whom? For what amount? 

3. After an independent question within a larger sentence. 

The question “Who will absorb the costs?” went unanswered. 

When will the reorganization take place? will surely be asked.

4. To express doubt. 

They plan to purchase three(?) new Pentium computers with individual scanners for us. 

Jackie Baltzell and Gayle Magill have been associated with her since 1990(?).

ALONG WITH OTHER PUNCTUATION ... 

5. Use a question mark before a closing parenthesis only when it applies solely to the 

parenthetical item and the sentence ends in a different punctuation mark. 

At our next meeting (it’s on the 16th, isn’t it?), we’ll elect a new president. As the gun opened fire

(was it a .50-caliber gun?), all movement ceased. [Question marks were used within 

parentheses because sentences require a period at the end.]

Are tickets still available (and can I get two), or is it too late? [Question mark is omitted within

parentheses because sentence ends with a question mark.]

6. A question mark is placed inside the closing quotation mark only when it applies to the 

quoted material or when the same punctuation is required for both the quotation and the 

sentence as a whole. 

She asked, “Did you enjoy the trip?” [Question mark belongs with quoted material.]

Why did he ask, “When does it start?” [Question mark is same as ending punctuation.]

Did you say, “I’ll help out”? [Quoted material is not a question; therefore, question mark applies 

to the sentence as a whole.] 

7. When a question within a sentence is set off by dashes, place the question mark before

the closing dash. 

The new class—isn’t it called Super Seminar?—begins tomorrow. 

– 303 –
Punctuation 

SPACING WHEN USING A QUESTION MARK... 

• Two spaces after the end of a sentence—unless manuscript format and using right justified, 

then one space after (see page 302, spacing). 

• No space after when another punctuation mark immediately follows (closing quotation mark, 

closing parenthesis, closing dash). 

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one 

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable. 

English ... A Changing Language

Awful, terrible once meant “fear inspiring.” 

Barn once meant “barley-place.” 

Doom once meant “any legal judgment.”

Girl once was used to refer to a child of either sex. 

Hussy once meant “housewife.”

Marshall once meant “stable boy” (one who looked after mares). 

Meat once meant “food.” 

Nice once meant “ignorant.” 

Nimble once meant “good at taking things.” 

Shrewd once meant “wicked.” 

Silly once meant “fortunate.” 

Smart once meant “causing pain.” 

Starve once meant “die.” 

Villain once meant “farm worker.” 

 

 –found in Building Better English

– 304 –
The Tongue and Quill 

QUOTATION MARKS 

USE QUOTATION MARKS ... 

1. To enclose the exact words of a speaker or writer. With few exceptions, a quotation must 

be copied exactly as it appears in the original. If the quotation is woven into the flow of the 

sentence, do not use punctuation preceding the opening quotation mark. When words interrupt a 

quotation, close and reopen the quotation. 

Robert Frost said, “The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the 

morning and doesn’t stop until you get to the office.” 

Why does she insist on saying “It just won’t work”?

“A pint of sweat” says General George S. Patton, “will save a gallon of blood.” 

NOTE: Do not set off indirect quotations. 

Why does she insist on saying that it just won’t work?

2. To enclose slogans or mottoes, but not signs or notices. 

He had a “do or die” attitude. He has a No Smoking sign in his car. 

“All’s well that ends well” is a popular slogan. There is a Gone Fishing notice on his door. 

 

3. To enclose words or phrases used to indicate humor, slang, irony, or poor grammar. 

They serve “fresh” seafood all right—fresh from the freezer! 

For whatever reason, she just “ain’t talkin’.” 

NOTE: When using quotation marks with other punctuation, the comma and period are always 

placed inside the closing quotation marks; the semicolon is always placed outside the closing 

quotation marks; the dash, exclamation mark, and question mark are placed according to the 

structure of the sentence (see guidelines on pages 288, 292, and 303). 

4. With words and phrases that are introduced by such expressions as cited as, classified, 

designated, entitled, labeled, marked, named, signed, the term, the word when the exact 

message is quoted. Capitalize the first word when it begins a sentence, when it was capitalized 

in the original, when it represents a complete sentence, or when it is a proper noun. 

The card was signed “Your friend, Diane.” 

The article was entitled “How to Write English That is Alive.” 

“Fragile” was stamped on the outside of the package. 

The report is classified “secret” and can’t be distributed. 

Our organization received an “Outstanding” Quality Air Force Assessment (QAFA) rating. 

NOTE: Do not enclose these expressions: called, known as, so-called, etc. 

The flower was called an American Beauty rose. 

The boy whose name is “Bill Kent” was known as Clark Kent. 

The so-called secret report can now be distributed.

– 305 –
Punctuation 

5. To enclose the title of any part (chapter, lesson, topic, section, article, heading) of a 

published work (book, play, speech, symphony, etc.). The title of the published work should 

be underlined in typed material and italicized in printed material. 

The Appendix 1 section in AFH 33-337 is “The Mechanics of Writing.” 

When you read “Air Force Writing Products and Templates” section of The Tongue and Quill, 

keep in mind ... 

6. To enclose titles of complete but unpublished works such as manuscripts, dissertations 

and reports. 

We need to get a copy of the “The Evolution of a Revolt” document as soon as possible. 

The title of his dissertation is “Why Smoking Should be Banned from All Public Places.” 

7. To enclose the titles of songs and radio and television shows. 

They sang “The Star Spangled Banner” before the game began.

“M.A.S.H.” is still being shown on TV. 

8. To denote inches. 

6′′ × 15′′ [use inch (′′) mark and multiplication (×) mark if using typewriter or computer that has 

these keys] 

9. To enclose a nickname or descriptive expression when it falls between a person’s first 

and last names. However, when it precedes or replaces a person’s first name, simply 

capitalize it. 

George Herman “Babe” Ruth Stonewall Jackson 

the Iron Duke Major William F. “Clark” Kent

10. To enclose misnomers, slang expressions, nickname, coined words, or ordinary words 

used in an arbitrary way. 

His report was “bunk.” It was a “gentlemen’s agreement.” 

The “invisible government” is responsible. but He voted for the lameduck amendment.

 

SPACING WHEN USING QUOTATION MARKS... 

—opening 

• Two spaces before when quoted matter starts a new sentence or follows a colon—unless 

manuscript format and using right justified, then one space before. 

• No space before when a dash or an opening parenthesis precedes. 

• One space before in all other cases. 

• No space after. 

—closing 

• No space before. 

• Two spaces after when quoted matter ends the sentence—unless manuscript format and using 

right justified, then one space after (see page 302, spacing). 

• No space after when another punctuation mark immediately follows (semicolon, colon). 

• One space after in all other cases. 

NOTE: The Tongue and Quill favors two spaces after the end of a sentence. Rather to use one 

space or two is left up to the individual or organization. Either way is acceptable. 

– 306 –
The Tongue and Quill 

SEMICOLON 

USE A SEMICOLON ... 

1. To separate independent clauses not connected by a coordinating conjunction (and, but, 

for, or, nor, and so), and in statements too closely related in meaning to be written as 

separate sentences. 

The students were ready; it was time to go. 

It’s true in peace; it’s true in war. 

War is destructive; peace, constructive. 

2. Before transitional words and phrases (accordingly, as a result, besides, consequently, for 

example, furthermore, hence, however, moreover, namely, nevertheless, on the contrary, 

otherwise, that is, then, therefore, thus, and yet) when connecting two complete but related 

thoughts and a coordinating conjunction is not used. Follow these words and phrases with a 

comma. Do not use a comma after hence, then, thus, so and yet unless a pause is needed. 

Our expenses have increased; however, we haven’t raised our prices. 

Our expenses have increased, however, and we haven’t raised our prices. 

The decision has been made; therefore, there’s no point in discussing it further. 

The decision has been made so there’s no point in discussing it.

The general had heard the briefing before; thus, he chose not to attend. 

Let’s wait until next month; then we can get better result figures. 

3. To separate items in a series that contain commas (when confusion would otherwise 

result). 

If you want your writing to be worthwhile, organize it; if you want it to be easy to read, use simple 

words and phrases; and, if you want it to be interesting, vary your sentence and paragraph

lengths. 

Those who attended the meeting were Colonels Jim Forsyth, Dean of Education; Michael Harris, 

Dean of Distance Learning; Mark Zimmerman, Chairman of Leadership and Communications

Studies; and Phil Tripper, Chairman of Joint Warfare Studies. 

4. To precede words or abbreviations that introduce a summary or explanation of what 

has gone before in the sentence.

We visited several countries on that trip; i.e., England, Ireland, France, Germany, and Finland. 

There are many things you must arrange before leaving on vacation; for example, mail pickup, pet

care, yard care. 

SPACING WHEN USING A SEMICOLON... 

No space before. 

One space after.

– 307 –
Punctuation 

– 308 –

FUNNY SIGNS 

1. IN A LAUNDROMAT: Automatic washing machines. Please remove all your clothes when 

the light goes out.

2. IN A LONDON DEPARTMENT STORE: Bargain Basement Upstairs 

3. IN AN OFFICE: Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday kindly bring it 

back or further steps will be taken. 

4. IN ANOTHER OFFICE: After the tea break, staff should empty the teapot and stand 

upside down on the draining board. 

5. ON A CHURCH DOOR: This is the gate of Heaven. Enter ye all by this door. (This door 

is kept locked because of the draft. Please use side entrance) 

6. OUTSIDE A SECOND-HAND SHOP: We exchange anything—bicycles, washing machines 

etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain.

7. QUICKSAND WARNING: Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. By 

order of the District Council. 

8. NOTICE IN A DRY CLEANER’S WINDOW: Anyone leaving their garments here for more 

than 30 days will be disposed of. 

9. IN A HEALTH FOOD SHOP WINDOW: Closed due to illness. 

10. SPOTTED IN A SAFARI PARK: Elephants Please Stay In Your Car 

11. SEEN DURING A CONFERENCE: For anyone who has children and doesn’t know it, there 

is a day care on the first floor. 

12. NOTICE IN A FIELD: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the

bull charges. 

13. MESSAGE ON A LEAFLET: If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get 

lessons. 

14. ON A REPAIR SHOP DOOR: We can repair anything (Please knock hard on the door—

the bell doesn't work).

15. SPOTTED IN A TOILET IN A LONDON OFFICE BLOCK: Toilet out of order. Please use

floor below.
ABBREVIATING 

ABCs

 ə-,bre-ve-’a-shən 

A shortened form of a written word or phrase used in

place of the whole. 

 — Webster’s Tenth New 

 Collegiate Dictionary 

 

What’s the appropriate abbreviation? Can I abbreviate in this document? How do I write it—all 

capital letters, all lowercase letters, or caps and lowercase letters? Can I use just the abbreviation 

or must I spell it out? How do I make it plural—add an s, or an ’s? Where do I go for answers? 

Though these questions are insignificant when compared with some Air Force problems, 

thousands of people confront these issues on a daily basis. To clear the smoke surrounding the 

use of abbreviations, we’ve listed some types of abbreviations used in Air Force writing and 

some general guidelines regarding their proper use. 

– 309 –
The Tongue and Quill 

ACRONYMS: Pronounceable words formed by combining initial letter(s) of the words that 

make up the complete form. Most acronyms are written in all caps without punctuation, but 

some are so commonly used they are now considered words in their own right. 

AAFES (Army and Air Force Exchange Service) 

NATO (North Atlantic Treaty Organization) 

POW (prisoner of war) 

laser (light amplification by simulated emission of radiation)

Modem (modular/demodulator) 

SALT (strategic arms limitation talks) 

scuba (self-contained underwater breathing apparatus) 

ZIP code (Zone Improvement Plan code) 

BREVITY CODES: Combinations of letters—pronounced letter by letter—designed to 

shorten a phrase, sentence or group of sentences. 

CFC (Combined Federal Campaign) 

DDALV (days delay en route authorized chargeable as leave) 

DOD (Department of Defense) 

PCS (permanent change of station)

TDY (temporary duty) 

CNN (Cable Network News) 

NOTE: When brevity codes begin with b, c, d, g, j, k, p, q, t, u, v, w, y, or z, the indefinite article 

a is used. With a, e, f, h, i, l, m, n, o, r, s, or x, use an.

CONTRACTIONS: Shortened forms of words in which an apostrophe indicates the 

deletion of letters. 

can’t (cannot) 

don’t (do not) 

I’ll (I will) 

I’m (I am) 

I’ve (I have) 

isn’t (is not)

it’s (it is) 

let’s (let us) 

mustn’t (must not) 

they’re (they are) 

we’re (we are) 

won’t (will not) 

wouldn’t (would not) 

you’ve (you have) 

– 310 –
Abbreviating ABCs 

ABBREVIATIONS IN GENERAL:

• Use in informal documents, manuals, reference books, business and legal documents, 

scholarly footnotes, etc., when needed to save space. Avoid using in formal documents when 

style, elegance and formality are important. 

• In formal writing “United States” is a noun (The United States and Canada were founding 

...); “US” is an adjective (US policy regarding ...). 

• Use sparingly, correctly and consistently. 

• Spell out the word (or words) the first time used and enough times within the document to 

remind readers of its meaning. 

• Use a figure to express the quantity in a unit of measure (without a hyphen in a unit modifier) 

when using an abbreviation. [3 mi, 55 mph, 50 lb, 33 mm film] 

• Write abbreviations “first,” “second,” “third,” “fourth,” etc., as 1st, 2d, 3d, 4th, etc. 

• Use when there’s a choice between using an abbreviation and a contraction. [gov vs gov’t] 

• Use the shortest form that doesn’t jeopardize clarity when there’s more than one way to 

abbreviate a word or phrase. [con, cont, contd] 

• Avoid beginning a sentence with an abbreviation (except Mr., Mrs., Ms., Dr.), acronyms and 

brevity codes. 

• Avoid using in main headings. 

• Avoid using words that are offensive, profane or repulsive when assigning acronyms, brevity 

codes and contractions. 

• Write without punctuation unless confusion would result. [The abbreviation for inch (in.) 

might be confused with the word in, the abbreviation for number (no.) might be confused 

with the word no, etc.] 

• Write abbreviations for single words in lowercase letters. [hospital - hosp; 

letter - ltr]

• Use the same abbreviation for singular and plural forms after spelling it out. [area of 

responsibility (AOR) - areas of responsibility (AOR)] 

• When ambiguity could result, form the plural with a lowercase s and never use an apostrophe 

to form the plural. [letters - ltrs; travel requests - TRs; area of operations - AO; areas of 

operations - AOs] 

• Do not cap the words just because the acronym or brevity code is capped. Check a source 

book, the library or the office of responsibility for the correct form. [OJT - on the job 

training; OPSEC - operations security; JIPC - joint imagery production complex; JCS - Joint 

Chiefs of Staff]

• Contact the office of primary responsibility for its proper use when writing articles, manuals, 

handouts, instructions, performance reports, award citations and narratives, and unit histories. 

• Find out if your organization has a preference and use it. Otherwise, consult the latest 

dictionary or use the Joint Publication 1-02, Department of Defense Dictionary of Military 

and Associated Terms, for terms and definitions.

• Use the “/” (slash) when punctuating some abbreviations. [with – w/ or without – w/o; 

input/output – I/O] 

• SPELL IT OUT if there’s still doubt!

– 311 –
The Tongue and Quill 

SOME ABBREVIATIONS USED BY AIR FORCE WRITERS ...

Air Force Ranks 

Airman Basic AB 

Airman Amn

Airman First Class A1C 

Senior Airman SrA 

Staff Sergeant SSgt 

Technical Sergeant TSgt 

Master Sergeant MSgt 

Senior Master Sergeant SMSgt 

Chief Master Sergeant CMSgt 

Chief Master Sergeant of the Air Force CMSAF 

Second Lieutenant 2d Lt 

First Lieutenant 1st Lt 

Captain Capt 

Major Maj

Lieutenant Colonel Lt Col 

Colonel Col

Brigadier General Brig Gen 

Major General Maj Gen 

Lieutenant General Lt Gen

General Gen

Days Months Years

Sun Jan Jul 1999 99

Mon Feb Aug 2000 00

Tues Mar Sep 2001 01

Wed Apr Oct 2002 02

Thurs May Nov 2003 03

Fri Jun Dec 2004 04

Sat etc.

ZIP Code, State and Possession Abbreviations 

Alabama AL Ala Montana MT Mont 

Alaska AK Nebraska NE Nebr 

Arizona AZ Ariz Nevada NV Nev 

Arkansas AR New Hampshire NH 

California CA Calif New Jersey NJ 

Colorado CO Colo New Mexico NM NMex 

Connecticut CT Conn New York NY 

Delaware DE Del North Carolina NC 

Florida FL Fla North Dakota ND NDak 

Georgia GA Ga Ohio OH 

Hawaii HI Oklahoma OK Okla 

Idaho ID Oregon OR Oreg 

Illinois IL Ill Pennsylvania PA Pa 

Indiana IN Ind Rhode Island RI 

Iowa IA South Carolina SC 

Kansas KS Kans South Dakota SD SDak 

Kentucky KY Ky Tennessee TN Tenn 

Louisiana LA La Texas TX Tex 

Maine ME Utah UT

Maryland MD Md Vermont VT Vt 

Massachusetts MA Mass Virginia VA Va

Michigan MI Mich Washington WA Wash 

Minnesota MN Minn West Virginia WV Wva

Mississippi MS Miss Wisconsin WI Wis 

Missouri MO Mo Wyoming WY Wyo 

American Samoa AS Northern Mariana Islands MP

District of Columbia DC Palau PW

Federated States of Micronesia FM Puerto Rico PR

Guam GU Virgin Islands VI 

Marshall Islands MH 

– 312 – 
Abbreviating ABCs

Field Operating Agencies

AF Agency for Modeling and Simulation AFAMS 

AF Audit Agency AFAA 

AF Base Conversion Agency AFBCA 

AF Center for Environmental Excellence AFCEE 

AF Center for Quality and Management Innovation AFCQMI 

AF Civil Engineer Support Agency AFCESA 

AF Communications Agency AFCA 

AF Cost Analysis Agency AFCAA 

AF Flight Standards Agency AFFSA 

AF Historical Research Agency AFHRA 

AF History Support Office AFHSO 

AF Inspection Agency AFIA

AF Legal Services Agency AFLSA 

AF Logistics Management Agency AFLMA 

AF Medical Operations Agency AFMOA 

AF Medical Support Agency AFMSA 

AF National Security, Emergency Preparedness Office AFNSEPO 

AF News Agency AFNEWS 

AF Office of Special Investigations AFOSI 

AF Operations Group AFOG 

AF Personnel Center AFPC 

AF Personnel Operations Agency AFPOA 

AF Program Executive Office AFPEO 

AF Real Estate Agency AFREA 

AF Review Boards Agency AFRBA 

AF Safety Center AFSC

AF Service Agency AFSVA 

AF Studies and Analyses Agency AFSAA 

AF Technical Applications Center AFTAC

AF Intelligence Agency AIA 

Air National Guard Readiness Center ANGRC 

Air Reserve Personnel Center ARPC 

Air Force Weather Agency AFWA 

Joint Services Survival, Evasion, JSSA 

 Resistance and Escape Agency

Phonetic Alphabet 

A Alfa N November 

B Bravo O Oscar 

C Charlie P Papa 

D Delta Q Quebec 

E Echo R Romeo 

F Foxtrot S Sierra

G Golf T Tango 

H Hotel U Uniform 

I India V Victor 

J Juliett W Whiskey

K Kilo X Xray

L Lima Y Yankee 

M Mike Z Zulu

Academic Degrees

Bachelor of Arts BA 

Bachelor of Science BS

Master of Arts MA 

Master of Science MS 

Doctor of Philosophy PhD 

Doctor of Law LLD 

Doctor of Medicine MD 

Doctor of Dentistry DDS

Secondary Address Unit Indicators 

Apartment APT 

Building BLDG 

Department DEPT 

Floor FL

Room RM 

Suite STE

– 313 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Latin Abbreviations 

A.M. ante meridiem before noon 

c. or ca circa about, approximately

e.g. exempli gratia for example, for instance

et al. et allii, et alia and other people/things 

etc. et cetera and so on, and other things 

ib, ibid. ibidem in the same place

i.e. id est that is to say 

loc. cit. loco citato in the place cited/mentioned 

op. cit. opere citato in the work cited/mentioned before 

P.M. post meridiem after noon 

P.S. post scriptum after writing 

Pro tem. pro tempore for the time, temporarily

Q.E.D. quod erat demonstrandum which was to be shown 

Sc. sic thus used, spelt, etc. 

v., versus vs. against 

v.v. vice versa the other way around

Units of Measure

gallon gal 

hertz hz 

kilogram kg 

miles per hour mph 

70 Degrees Celsius 70o C 

revolutions per minute rpm 

inch in. 

foot ft 

mile mi

kilometer km

millimeter mm

pounds per square inch psi 

nautical miles NM

Direct Reporting Units 

AF Doctrine Center AFDC 

AF Operational Test and Evaluation Center AFOTEC 

AF Security Forces Center AFSFC 

United States Air Force Academy USAFA 

11th Wing 11 WG 

Major Commands 

Air Combat Command ACC 

Air Education and Training Command AETC 

AF Materiel Command AFMC 

AF Reserve Command AFRC 

AF Space Command AFSPC 

AF Special Operations Command AFSOC 

Air Mobility Command AMC 

Pacific Air Forces PACAF

United States Air Forces in Europe USAFE

– 314 – 
Abbreviating ABCs

– 315 –

Researcher’s Guide to Abbreviations 

app appendix l (el) line (plural: ll) [not recommended because 

 the abbreviation in the singular might be

 mistaken for “one” and the plural for 

 “eleven”]

art article (plural: arts) n not, footnote (plural: nn) 

b born nd no date 

bk book (plural: bks) no. number (plural: nos) 

c copyright np no place; no publisher 

ca circa, about, approximately NS new series 

cf confer, compare [confer is op cit opere citato in the work cited 

 Latin for “compare”: cf must

not be used as the abbreviation 

for the English “confer,” nor 

should cf be use to mean “see”) 

ch chapter (in legal references only) OS old series

chap chapter (plural: chaps) p page (plural: pp) [it always precedes the 

 numbers; when “p” follows a number, it can 

 stand for “pence”]

col column (plural: cols) para Paragraph (plural: pars) 

comp complier (plural: comps); passim here and there 

 complied by

d died pt part (plural: pts) 

dept department (plural: depts) qv quod vide, which see (for use with cross- 

 references

div division (plural: divs) sc scene 

e.g. exempli gratia, for example sec section (plural: secs) 

 (use without etc.) 

ed edition, edited by editor [sic] so, thus; show erroneous material

 (plural: eds) intentionally kept in text

et al et alii, and others sup supplement (plural: sups) 

et seq et sequens, and the following supra above 

etc. et cetera, and so forth sv sub verbo, sub voce, under the word (for use 

 in references to listing in encyclopedias and 

 dictionaries)

fig figure (plural: figs) trans translator, translated by 

fl flourit flourished (for use v verse (plural: vv) 

when birth and death dates

 are not known) 

i.e. id est, that is (use with etc.) viz videlicet, namely

ibid ibidem, in the same place vol volume (plural: vols) 

id idem, the same (refers to vs versus, against (v in law references) 

persons, except in law 

citations; not to be confused 

 with ibid) 

infra below 
The Tongue and Quill

something to consider ... 

Build effective sentences with active voice, less

garbage, positive tone (pages 23-24) and correct 

words ~ see pages 73-87

Drafting an effective paragraph with 

transitional devices ~ see pages 68-73

Writing your draft ~ see pages 64-90

Editing your work ~ see pages 91-103

– 316 –
CAPITALIZATION 

GUIDELINES 

Air Force writers and reviewers spend an excessive amount of time trying to determine the 

appropriate use of capital letters (and abbreviations and numbers, as well). Everybody seems to 

want it a different way. Authoritative sources don’t even agree! Put a half dozen style manuals 

in front of you and compare the rules—two out of the six might agree in some cases. 

The reason for using capital letters is to give distinction or add importance to certain words 

or phrases. “But,” you might say, “I thought it was important and should be capitalized, but the 

Command Section kicked it back to be changed to lowercase letters.” It’s unfortunate, but, if 

someone else is signing the document, that person has the last word. The best advice we can 

give you is to find out what style your organization prefers and use it consistently. 

Although we can’t possibly cover every situation, what follows is designed to provide some

measure of consistency within the Air Force. You must ensure consistency within everything 

you write or type. A word of caution: When you’re preparing Air Force publications, 

performance reports, forms/IMTs, awards, or other unique packages, consult the appropriate 

manuals or the office of primary responsibility to determine their unique requirements; e.g., Joint 

Publication 1-02, Department of Defense Dictionary of Military and Associated Terms.

– 317 –
The Tongue and Quill

FIRST WORDS 

1. CAPITALIZE THE FIRST WORD... 

a. of every sentence. 

Twenty-one people attended the secret presentation given by the chief of staff. 

Nonessential government employees were furloughed from 14 to 19 November 2002.

b. of every sentence fragment treated as a complete sentence. 

Really? No! So much for that. 

More discussion. No agreement. Another hour wasted.

c. of direct questions and quotations placed within a sentence even if quotation marks 

are not used. 

The commander asked this question: How many of you are volunteers?

The order read “Attack at dawn.” 

d. of items shown in a list (using numbers, letters, or display dots) when a complete 

sentence introduces them. 

The commander listed the following responsibilities of liaison officers: 

a. Become familiar with the situation.

b. Know the mission. 

c. Arrange for communications. 

e. in the salutation and complimentary closing of a letter. 

Dear Mr. McBride Sincerely Respectfully yours 

f. after a hyphen when the hyphenated word is followed by a proper noun or 

adjective. 

non-Latin speaking people

g. after a colon when the 

(1) word is a proper noun or the pronoun I. 

Two courses are required: English and Economics. 

(2) word is the first word of a quoted sentence.

When asked by his teacher to explain the difference between a sofa and a love seat, the nursery school boy 

had this to say: “Don’t reckon I know, ma’am, but you don’t put your feet on either one.” 

(3) expression after the colon is a complete sentence that is the dominant or more 

general element. 

A key principle: Nonessential elements are set off by commas; essential elements are not set off. 

(4) material following the colon consists of two or more sentences. 

There are several drawbacks to this: First, it ties up our capital for three years. Second, the likelihood

of a great return on our investment is questionable. 

– 318 –
Capitalization Guidelines 

(5) material following the colon starts on a new line. 

They gave us two reasons:

1. They received the order too late. 

2. It was Friday and nothing could be done until Monday. 

(6) material preceding the colon is an introductory word (NOTE, CAUTION, 

WANTED, HINT, or REMEMBER). 

WANTED: Three editorial assistants who know computers as well as editing and typesetting. 

h. each line in a poem. (Always follow the style of the poem, however). 

I used to write quite poorly. 

My boss said it made him ill. 

But now he’s feeling better 

’Cuz I use The Tongue and Quill! 

 - TSgt Keyes 

2. DO NOT CAPITALIZE... 

a. the first word of a sentence enclosed in parentheses within another sentence unless 

the first word is a proper noun, the pronoun I, the first word of a quoted sentence, or 

begins a complete parenthetical sentence standing alone. 

The company finally moved (they were to have vacated 2 months ago) to another location. 

One of our secretaries (Carolyn Brown) will record the minutes of today’s meeting. 

This is the only tree in our yard that survived the ice storm. (It’s a pecan tree.) 

b. part of a quotation slogan or motto if it is not capitalized in the original quotation. 

General MacArthur said that old soldiers “just fade away.”

c. items shown in enumeration when completing the sentence that introduces them. 

Liaison officers must 

a. become familiar with the situation,

b. know the mission and 

c. arrange for communications. 

[Notice punctuation] 

d. the first word of an independent clause after a colon if the clause explains, illustrates 

or amplifies the thought expressed in the first part of the sentence. 

Essential and nonessential elements require altogether different punctuation: the latter should be set off by

commas, whereas the former should not. 

e. after a colon if the material cannot stand alone as a sentence. 

I must countersign all cash advances, with one exception: when the amount is less than $50. 

Three subjects were discussed: fund raising, membership, and bylaws. 

– 319 –
The Tongue and Quill

PROPER NOUNS AND COMMON NOUNS 

1. Capitalize all proper names (the official name of a person, place or thing). 

Porie and Tourcoing Anglo-Saxon Cliff Brow

Judy Phillips-McDonald Rio Grande River Stratford-on-Avon

the Capitol in DC the capital of Maine is ... Mönchengladbach

US Constitution the Constitution the Alamo

2. Capitalize a common noun or adjective that forms an essential part of a proper name, 

but not a common noun used alone as a substitute for the name of a place or thing. 

Statue of Liberty; the statue Potomac River; the river 

Air War College; the college Berlin Wall; the wall 

Washington Monument; the monument Vietnam Veterans Memorial; the memorial

3. If a common noun or adjective forming an essential part of a name becomes removed 

from the rest of the name by an intervening common noun or adjective, the entire 

expression is no longer a proper noun and is not capitalized. 

Union Station; union passenger station Eastern States; eastern farming states 

4. Capitalize names of exercises, military operations, military concepts, etc. 

Exercise GLOBAL SHIELD Operation ENDURING FREEDOM

Principles of War New Vision; Global Reach, Global Power 

Air and Space Superiority Precision Engagement 

Information Superiority Agile Combat Support

TITLES OF LITERARY AND ARTISTIC WORKS AND HEADINGS 

1. Capitalize all words with four or more letters in titles and artistic works and in 

displayed headings. 

2. Capitalize words with fewer than four letters except... 

a. Articles: the, a, an 

b. Short conjunctions: and, as, but, if, or, nor

c. Short prepositions: at, by, for, in, of, off, on, out, to, up

NOTE: Capitalize short verb forms like Is and Be, but not to when part of an infinitive. 

How to Complete a Goal Without Really Trying

“Reorganization of Boyd Academy Is Not Expected to Be Approved” 

3. Capitalize all hyphenated words, except articles and short prepositions; coordinating 

conjunctions; second elements of prefixes (unless proper noun or proper adjective); and 

flat, sharp and natural after musical key symbols. 

English-Speaking Run-of-the-Mill Non-Christians Follow-Through

Large-Sized Mat Post-Prezhnev Self-explanatory Ex-Governor 

Over-the-Hill Sayings Twenty-first Century One-eighth E-flat Concerto

– 320 –
Capitalization Guidelines 

4. Capitalize articles, short conjunctions and short prepositions when:

a. the first and last word of a title. 

“A Son-in-Law to Be Proud Of” 

b. the first word following a dash or colon in a title. 

Richard Nixon—The Presidential Years Copyright Issues of the Air Force: A Reexamination

c. short words like in, out and up in titles when they serve as adverbs rather than as 

prepositions. These words may occur as adverbs in verb phrases or in hyphenated compounds 

derived from verb phrases. 

“IBM Chalks Up Record Earnings for the Year” 

“Wilmington Is Runner-Up in the Election”

“Sailing up the Rhein” 

d. short prepositions like in and up when used together with prepositions having four 

or more letters. 

“Driving Up and Down the Interstate” 

“Events In and Around Town”

NAMES OF GOVERNMENT BODIES, EMPLOYEES, NATIONAL AND INTERNATIONAL 

REGIONS, DOCUMENTS 

1. Capitalize, except when used in a general sense... 

a. full and shortened names of national and international organizations, movements, 

and alliances and members of political parties.

Republican Party republicanism, communism 

Republican platform; Republican Bolshevik; Bolshevists 

Eastern bloc; Communist bloc Common Market; Holy Alliance 

Democratic Party; Federalist Party Federalist; Russian Federation; Supreme Soviet 

Communist Party; Communist 

b. full and shortened names of US national governmental and military bodies. 

US Government the Federal Government, government workers 

US Congress, Congress US Air Force, Air Force 

Department of Defense (DOD) US Navy, Navy; Marine Corps, the corps 

Defense Department House of Representatives, the House 

armed forces, armed services Reserve Component, Active Component

National Command Authorities Joint Chiefs of Staff, the joint chiefs 

Department of the Air Force executive branch 

Air Force Reserve, reserve officer, reservist Air National Guard, the Guard

NOTE: If Army, Navy, or Air Force can be used logically for Marines, use M. If the word 

soldier or soldiers logically fits it, use m. 

Michael Johnson enlisted in the Marines. three marines 

a Marine landing a company of Marines 

– 321 –
The Tongue and Quill

c. titles of government employees.

US President, the President commander in chief 

Presidential campaign Russian President 

Congressman Everett; a congressman US Senate; a senator; Senator Clinton

Navy officer; naval officer Secretary of State 

Service component command chaplain service chiefs; chief of staff 

the Bush Administration, the Administration British Prime Minister 

d. full titles of departments, directorates and similar organizations. 

Department of Labor, the department Directorate of Data Processing, the directorate 

Center for Strategic Studies, the agency Special Plans Division, the division 

Air War College, the college Squadron Officer School, the school

e. full titles of armies, navies, air forces, fleets, regiments, battalions, companies, corps, 

etc., but lowercase army, navy, air force, etc., when part of a general title for other 

countries. 

Continental army; Union army Fifth Army; the Eighth; the army 

Royal Air Force; British air force British navy; the navy

Russian government US Air Force, the Air Force; Navy’s air force 

People’s Liberation Army Red China’s army; the army 

f. full names of judicial bodies. 

Supreme Court, the Court traffic court, judicial court 

California Supreme Court state supreme court 

Circuit Court of Elmore County county court; circuit court 

 Cabinet members

NAMES OF STATE AND LOCAL GOVERNMENT BODIES 

1. Capitalize the full names of state and local bodies and organizations, but not the 

shortened names unless mentioned with the name of the city, county, or state. 

Virginia Assembly; the assembly

Montgomery County Board of Health; the Board of Health of Montgomery County; the board of 

health will ... 

2. Capitalize the word state only when it follows the name of a state or is part of an 

imaginative name. 

New York State is called the Empire State. 

The state of Alaska is the largest in the Union. 

After an assignment overseas, we returned to the States. 

3. Capitalize the word city only when it is part of the corporate name of the city or part of 

an imaginative name. 

Kansas City; the city of Cleveland, Ohio, is ... 

Chicago is the Windy City; Philadelphia, the City of Brotherly Love

– 322 –
Capitalization Guidelines 

4. Capitalize empire, state, country, etc., when they follow words that show political 

divisions of the world, a county, a state, a city, etc., if they form an accepted part of it; 

lowercase if it precedes the name or stands alone. 

11th Congressional District his congressional district

 Fifth Ward the ward

Indiana Territory the territory of Indiana 

Roman Empire the empire 

Washington State the state of Washington 

ACTS, AMENDMENTS, BILLS, LAWS, PUBLICATIONS, TREATIES, WARS

Capitalize the titles of official acts, amendments, bills, laws, publications, treaties and wars, 

but not the common nouns or shortened forms that refer to them. 

Social Security Act Intermediate-Range Nuclear Forces Treaty 

US Code, Vol 28, Sec 2201-2 Gulf War; Seven Years’ War 

Fifth Amendment Tet offensive; Cuban Missile Crisis

 the income tax amendment Korean War; Korean conflict 

 GI bill; Bill of Rights, food stamp bill antitrust law; the law 

Sherman Antitrust Law World War II, WWII; the two world wars 

Air Force Manual 33-326; the manual Battle of the Bulge; Berlin Airlift; the airlift 

Treaty of Versailles, Jay Treaty; the treaty 

PROGRAMS, MOVEMENTS, CONCEPTS 

1. Capitalize the names of programs, movements, or concepts when used as proper nouns, 

but not when used in a general sense or latter day designations. 

Medicare Act; medicare payments Civil Rights Act; a civil rights leader 

Socialist Labor Party; socialism Veterans Administration; veteran benefits

Warfare Studies Phase; the phase Nation-States 

NOTE: Also capitalize their imaginative names.

the New Deal The New Frontier Pacific Rim 

the Great Society the War on Poverty Iron Curtain 

2. Capitalize terms like democrat, socialist and communist when they signify formal 

membership in a political party, but not when they merely signify belief in a certain 

philosophy. 

a lifelong democrat [person who believes in the principles of democracy] 

a lifelong Democrat [person who consistently votes for the Democratic Party]

independent voters leftists 

the right wing fascist tendencies 

3. Do not capitalize nouns and adjectives showing political and economic systems of 

thought and their proponents, except when derived from a proper noun. 

 bolshevism communism communist

 democracy fascism fascist 

 socialism socialist Marxism-Leninism

– 323 –
The Tongue and Quill

MILITARY RANK, MEDALS, AWARDS 

1. Capitalize military rank when it is used with a proper name, but not when it stands 

alone. 

Colonel Larry D. Grant and his secretary, Linda Wilson; the colonel 

We have 30 majors and 26 lieutenant colonels. 

She’s a staff sergeant in the Air Force. 

NOTE: After initially identifying by full grade and name, use only the surname with the short 

grade title. Do not mix abbreviations with full words (Lt Col, not Lt Colonel). 

Brigadier General Richard S. Glenn, Brig Gen, General or Gen Glenn 

Master Sergeant Stephanie Reed, MSgt or Sgt Reed 

Chief Master Sergeant Susan Sharp, Chief Sharp 

2. Capitalize specific names of medals and awards. 

Medal of Honor Distinguished Flying Cross congressional medal 

Nobel Prize Pulitzer Prize Oscars and Emmys

Purple Heart Legion of Merit Croix de Guerre

TITLES 

1. Capitalize official titles of honor and respect when being used with a proper name or in 

place of a specific proper name. 

a. national officials such as the President, Vice President, cabinet members, the heads 

of government agencies, and bureaus. 

President Bush; the President’s speech every President, Presidential campaigns 

Vice President Cheney Secretary of State 

Attorney General Director of FBI 

Commissioner of ... Chief Justice 

b. state officials. 

the Governor the Lieutenant Governor 

the attorney general the senator 

c. foreign dignitaries. 

the Queen (of England) Prime Minister

The Chancellor of Germany ... Prince of Wales 

d. international figures. 

the Pope the Secretary General of the United Nations. 

2. Capitalize any title (even if not of high rank) when it is used in direct address, except 

madam, miss, or sir if it stands alone without a proper name following. 

Please tell me, Colonel, what risks are involved in this campaign. 

I need to take some leave today, sir. 

I asked the colonel what risks were involved in this campaign. 

3. Also capitalize imaginative names used to refer to specific organizations. 

Big Blue [IBM] the Big Board [the NY Stock Exchange]

Ma Bell [AT&T] the Baby Bells [the US regional phone companies] 

– 324 –
Capitalization Guidelines 

4. Do not capitalize: 

a. organization officials. 

The commander will visit ... 

The secretary’s minutes were read and approved. [formal minutes]

b. job titles when they stand alone. 

Marion Conroy has been promoted to the position of senior accountant. 

c. general terms of classification. 

The Commandant of ACSC; an intermediate service school commandant

Have your director of research call me. 

Squadron Leader David Bye of the Royal Air Force 

Samuel A. South, USAF, Retired, went ...; Samuel A. South retired from ... 

United States senator 

a state governor 

every king 

any ambassador 

The 2d Security Forces Squadron Commander; the squadron commander

d. former, late, ex-, or -elect when used with titles. 

the late President Truman ex-President Bush Mayor-elect Bawley 

e. family titles when preceded by my, your, his, her, our, and their and describe a family 

relationship. 

Let me ask my mother and dad if that date is open for them. 

Do you think your brother Bobby would like to meet my sister Fern?

Frank wants us to meet his Uncle John. (Here Uncle John is a unit.) 

Frank wants us to meet his uncle, John Cunningham. 

f. the at the beginning of a title, except when actually part of the title or when used as 

part of an official name or title at the Secretariat or Air Staff level. 

For extensive details check the Encarta ’99. 

Major Gregg’s article was published in The New York Times. 

The Adjutant General The Inspector General

The Judge Advocate General The Surgeon General 

5. Do not capitalize when titles follow a personal name or used in place of a personal name. 

a. departments within an organization. 

Some civilians in Air Command and Staff College that will help you are: Linda Wilson, commandant’s 

 secretary; Shirley Keil, protocol officer; Glen Spivey, educational advisor; and Lisa McDay, Yuna 

 Braswell, and Rebecca Bryant, typesetters. 

I’m applying for a job in your Directorate of Education and Curriculum. 

The vacancy in our directorate has been filled. 

– 325 –
The Tongue and Quill

b. local governmental officials and those of lesser federal and state, except in writing 

intended for a limited readership where the intended reader would consider the official to 

be of high rank. 

Francis Fahey, mayor of Coventry, Rhode Island, appeared before a House committee today. The mayor 

 spoke forcefully about the... [national news service release.] 

The Mayor promised only last fall to hold the city sales tax at its present level. [editorial in a local 

 newspaper.]

I have written for an appointment with the attorney general and expect to hear from his office soon. 

I would like to request an appointment with the Attorney General. [memo to the state attorney general’s 

 office.]

COLLEGES, UNIVERSITIES, ORGANIZATIONS, COMMITTEES, AGENCIES 

Capitalize the proper names of colleges, universities, organizations, committees and 

agencies, but not the common nouns that refer to them. 

University of Alabama; the university Air Command and Staff College; the college

National Labor Relations Board; the board Organization of American States; the organization 

Veterans Administration; the administration Committee on Foreign Affairs; the committee 

42d Air Base Wing; the wing the National Security Agency; the agency 

NOTE: When using the abbreviated form of a numbered organization (e.g., ABW versus Air 

Base Wing), do not use th, st, or d with the number. When writing it out in its entirety (Supply 

Squadron versus SUPS), add the th, d, or st to the number. 

42d Air Base Wing or 42 ABW

42d Supply Squadron or 42 SUPS 

101st Air Refueling Wing or 101 ARW 

NOTE: The preferred style is to use the long method in written text and the shortened method in 

address elements, charts, graphs, notes, and bibliography. 

Maxwell Air Force Base, Alabama, has ... or Maxwell AFB, Alabama, is ... 

Maxwell AFB AL 36112-3648 or HQ USAF CO 80840-6254 [address use only] 

Maxwell AFB, Ala [notes, bibliography]

ACADEMIC DEGREES AND COURSE TITLES AND SUBJECTS 

1. Capitalize the names of specific course titles, but not areas of study. 

American History 201 meets on Tuesdays and Thursdays. 

Esther is teaching kindergarten at Daniel Prattville Elementary and is taking EDL 609, Personnel Admin. 

Psychology of Career Adjustment will be offered next quarter. 

The Leadership and Command course employs an approach to further ...

2. Capitalize academic degrees following a person’s name and when the complete title of

the degree is given, but not when they are used as general terms of classification. 

H. A. Schwartz, Doctor of Philosophy Bachelor of Arts Degree in Computer and 

master’s degree; bachelor’s degree Information Sciences 

BA, MA, PhD, LLD, MD, DDS, EdS bachelor of arts degree 

Master of Arts 

– 326 –
Capitalization Guidelines 

NOUNS WITH NUMBERS AND LETTERS 

Do not capitalize nouns followed by numbers or letters unless using full titles and then the 

first word and all-important words are capitalized. 

annex A chart 10 page 269 tab 2

appendix D DD Form 282 paragraph 3 table 10

article 2 exhibit A part II task 3.1

attachment 2 figure 7 room 154 verse 3 

book XI line 4 rule 3 volume 1 

building 1402 map 1 size 8 Annex A, Components 

chapter 5 note 1 subtask 3.1.1 Tab 2, Directory of Terms 

COMPASS DIRECTIONS 

1. Capitalize compass directions when referring to specific regions or when the direction is 

part of a specific name, but not when merely indicating a general direction or location: 

a. general direction/location. 

travel north on I-65 the west side of town

southeastern states East Side; Twin Cities 

b. specific regions or a part of the world. 

vacation in the Far East brought up in the Deep South; but there are 

 clouds forming in the south 

visit Northern Ireland and New England Central Europe; the Continent [Europe] 

Sun Belt; West Coast; North Pole 

c. part of a specific name. 

Southland Dairy Company Northeast Manufacturing Corporation 

2. Capitalize words such as northern, southern, eastern, and western when referring to 

people in a region and to their political, social or cultural activities, but not when merely 

indicating a general location or region. 

Southern hospitality Midwesterner 

Eastern bankers Western Hemisphere 

the South the Northern vote 

southern California northern Maine

CELESTIAL BODIES 

Capitalize the names of planets (Jupiter, Mars), stars (Polaris, the North Star), and 

constellations (the Big Dipper, the Milky Way). However, do not capitalize the words sun, 

moon, and earth unless they are used with the capitalized names of other planets or stars. 

With this weather, we won’t see the sun for a while. 

We have gone to the ends of the earth to reorganize this unit.

Compare Mars, Venus and Earth. 

– 327 –
The Tongue and Quill

DAYS OF THE WEEK, MONTHS, HOLIDAYS, EVENTS, PERIODS, SEASONS 

Capitalize the days of the week, months, holidays, historic events and periods. Do not 

capitalize seasons or latter-day designations. 

Sunday; Monday Roaring Twenties; Gay Nineties; Roaring 20s 

January; February Dark Ages; Middle Ages; Ice Age; the Restoration 

Veterans Day; New Year’s Day spring, summer, fall, winter 

Battle of the Bulge; World War II age of steam; nuclear age; space age; rocket age 

NOTE: A numerical designation of an era is lowercased if it’s not part of a proper noun; i.e., 

twenty-first century, the nineteen hundreds. 

RACES, PEOPLES, LANGUAGES 

Capitalize races, peoples, and languages. 

the Sioux; Mandarin Chinese African-American; black; Caucasian; white 

English; French; Finnish; German Hispanic; Latin American; Mexican

COMMERCIAL PRODUCTS 

Capitalize trade names, variety names and names of market grades and brands, but not the 

common nouns following such names. 

Elmer’s glue; Krazy Glue Choice lamb chops; White oats

Microsoft Windows software Kleenex tissue; 501 Levi jeans 

Macintosh computers; McIntosh apples Band-Aid; Ace bandage; Ping-Pong, table tennis 

Xerox; Photostat; photocopy; fax Scotch tape; Post-It notes; Magic Maker; White-Out

American Beauty rose Ivory soap; Coca-Cola; Coke; cola drink

RELIGIOUS REFERENCES 

1. Capitalize all references to a supreme being. 

God the Almighty 

the Lord the Holy Spirit 

the Supreme Being Allah

the Messiah Yahweh

2. Capitalize personal pronouns referring to a supreme being when they stand alone, 

without an antecedent nearby. 

Give praise unto Him. Seek the Lord for His blessing.

His loving care My Father 

Thy mercy Our Father 

3. Capitalize references to persons revered as divine. 

the Apostles Buddha 

John the Baptist the Blessed Virgin

the Prophet Saint Peter 

– 328 –
Capitalization Guidelines 

4. Capitalize the names of religions, their members, and their buildings. 

Reform Judaism Mormon Saint Mark’s Episcopal Church

Zen Buddhism Methodists Temple Beth Shalom

the Roman Catholic Church [the entire institution]

the Roman Catholic church on Bell Road [indefinite reference to a specific building]

5. Capitalize references to religious events. 

the Creation the Exodus the Crucifixion 

the Flood the Second Coming the Resurrection

6. Capitalize names of religious holidays. 

Passover Christmas Hanukkah 

7. In general, do not capitalize references to specific religious observances and services. 

bar mitzvah baptism the Eucharist 

seder christening the Mass 

8. Capitalize (do not quote or underscore) references to works regarded as sacred. 

the New International Bible the Koran the Ten Commandments 

biblical sources the Talmud the Sermon on the Mount 

the Revised Standard Version the Torah Psalms 23 and 25; Psalms 23-24 

the Old Testament the Our Father Kaddish 

the Book of Genesis the Lord’s Prayer Hail Mary 

Philippians 1:3 the Apostle’s Creed Psalms 23 and Joshua 9: 1-2, 5 

“A man stopped in at a truck stop for a cup of coffee. When the 

waitress set it in front of him, he decided to strike up a conversation. 

‘Looks like rain,’ he said. The waitress snapped back, ‘It tastes like 

coffee, doesn’t it?’” 

 — Anonymous

– 329 –
The Tongue and Quill

STOP, LOOK AND LISTEN

STOP punctuation fluctuation and capitalization 

frustration

LOOK at pages 273-307—the mechanics of 

writing

LISTEN for more to come ... on numbers

STOP, LOOK AND LISTEN to rule books on punctuation and 

capitalization. 

– 330 –
NUMBERS 

NUMBERS 

NUMBERS 

Tipvme!xf!mfu!uif!ovncfst!tqfbl!gps!uifntfmwft@!

It is impossible to establish an entirely consistent set of rules governing the use of numbers—

we’ve tried! When expressing numbers, keep in mind the significant difference in the 

appearance of numbers. Figures will grab your attention immediately because they stand out 

more clearly from the surrounding words, while numbers expressed in words are unemphatic and 

look like the rest of the words in the sentence. Figures emphasize; words de-emphasize.

The following guidelines cover the preferred Air Force style of expressing numbers. Remember, 

however, that personal and organizational preference, and appearance may override these 

guidelines. If your organization has a preferred style—use it. If not, read on.... 

• In general, numbers 10 and above should be expressed in figures, and numbers one through 

nine should be expressed in words. 

• In scientific and statistical material, all numbers are expressed in figures. 

• In high-level executive correspondence and nontechnical, formal, or literary

manuscripts, citation, decoration, memo to the general, textbook, and articles, spell out 

all numbers through one hundred and all round numbers that can be expressed in two words 

(one hundred, five thousand, forty-five hundred). All other numbers are written in figures 

(514). Turn to the next few pages and research the ones with checks (√) to know which to 

spell out in this style. It is appropriate, though, to use numbers in tables, charts, and 

statistical material.

– 331 –
The Tongue and Quill

FIGURE STYLE 

1. The following categories are almost always expressed in figures, unless high-level 

executive correspondence and nontechnical, formal, or literary manuscripts. Those with 

checkmarks (√) are to be spelled out if in high-level executive correspondence and nontechnical, 

formal, or literary manuscripts. Also when you abbreviate a unit of measure in a unit modifier, 

do not use a hyphen. 

TIME √

payable in 30 days a note due in 6 months 

waiting 3 hours 15 minutes later 

AGE √

a 3-year-old filly a boy 6 years old

52 years 10 months 5 days old a 17-year-old German girl

CLOCK TIME 

at 9:30 a.m. Eastern Standard Time; after 3:15 p.m. Greenwich Mean Time, after 1515 Z 

6 o’clock [do not use a.m. or p.m. with o’clock]

0800 [do not use the word hours when expressing military time] 

MONEY 

a $20 bill it costs 75 cents [if sentence contains other 

$5,000 to $10,000 worth; $2 million monetary amounts requiring the dollar 

 sign, use $.75]

$3 a pound a check for $125 [if sentence contains 

 other monetary 

$9.00 and $10.54 purchases amounts requiring the cents, use $125.00]

US $10,000 10,000 US dollars 

Can $10,000 10,000 Canadian dollars 

Mex $10,000 10,000 Mexican dollars 

DM 10,000 10,000 West German deutsche marks 

£10,000 10,000 British pounds 

¥10,000 10,0000 Japanese yen 

NOTE: To form the British pound on the typewriter, type a capital L over a lowercase f. To 

form a Japanese yen, type a capital Y over an equal (=) sign. 

MEASUREMENTS √

110 meters long 2 feet by 1 foot 8 inches 

5,280 feet 8 1/2- by 11-inch paper 

about 8 yards wide 200 horsepower 

23 nautical miles 15,000 miles 

DATES 

5 June 2004 or 5 Jun 04 [when 21st of July

abbreviating the month, also Fiscal Year 2004, FY04, the fiscal year 

abbreviate the year] Academic Year 2003, AY03, the academic year 

from 4 April to 20 June 2005 Class of 2004 or Class of ’04 

July, August and September 2004 on the 13th send it to 

– 332 –
Numbers

DIMENSIONS, SIZES, TEMPERATURES 

a room 4 by 5 meters size 6 tennis shoes 

a 15- by 30-foot room thermometer reads 16 degrees 

PERCENTAGES, RATIOS, PROPORTIONS, SCORES, VOTING RESULTS 

a 6 percent discount [use % in technical Alabama 14, Auburn 17 

writing, graphs, charts] a vote of 17 to 6 

a 50-50 chance a proportion of 5 to 1; a 5-to-1 ratio

an evaluation of 85 20/20 or twenty-twenty vision 

LATITUDE AND LONGITUDE 

a. In nontechnical text: 

the polar latitudes 

from 10o20 ́ north latitude to 10o20 ́ south latitude 

longitude 50o west

b. In technical work and tables: 

lat 32o25 ́20 ́ ́ N long 85o27 ́60 ́ ́ W

The map showed the eye of the hurricane to be at 32o25 ́60 ́ ́ N, 85o27 ́60 ́ ́ W. 

NUMBERS REFERRED TO AS NUMBERS AND MATHEMATICAL EXPRESSIONS 

pick a number from 1 to 10 number 7 is considered lucky

multiply by 1/4 No. 1—You’re No. 1 in my book. 

ABBREVIATIONS, SYMBOLS, SERIAL NUMBERS, DOCUMENT IDENTIFIERS 

$25 46-48 AD 

paragraph 3 attachment 2 

serial number 0958760 Proverbs 3:5-7 

lines 5 and 13 pages 273-278 

UNIT MODIFIERS AND HYPHENATIONS √

5-day week 8-year-old car 

110-metric-ton engine 1 1/2-inch pipe; 11⁄2-inch pipe; not 1-1/2 

10-foot pole 

2. When a sentence contains numbers used in a related series and any number in the series 

is 10 or more, express all numbers in the series in figures (except the first word of the 

sentence if it is a number). √ When a number is always a figure, it doesn’t change the other 

numbers to figures in the same sentence.

Six children ate 9 hamburgers, 14 hot dogs, and 6 Popsicles. 

Our office has five officers, two sergeants and six civilians. 

Our tiny office, which is only 200 square feet, contains five desks, two bookcases and five people. 

3. Numerical designations of military units are written as follows: 

a. Air Force units. Use figures to designate units up to and including wings. Use figures for 

numbered air forces only if using the abbreviation AF. 

19th Logistics Group; 19 LG 347th Wing; 347 WG

Ninth Air Force, 9 AF 42d Mission Support, 42 MSS 

but 19TH LOGISTIC GROUP (address label)

– 333 –
The Tongue and Quill

NOTE: Refer to AFMAN 33-326 for proper address elements, and keep in mind when you 

abbreviate the organizational name (CSG, TFW, AD, AF, etc.) do not use st, d, or th with the 

number. 

b. Army units. Use figures to designate all army units except corps and numbered armies. 

Use Roman numerals for corps and spell out numbered armies. 

2d Army Group First Army

III Corps 2d Infantry Division 

7th AAA Brigade 92d Infantry Regiment

c. Marine Corps units. Apply same rules as army units. 

d. Navy units. Use figures to designate all navy units except fleet. 

Seventh Fleet Carrier Group 8 VF31 

4. Numbers expressed in figures are made plural by adding s alone. 

in the 1990s four 10s in the deck 

temperature in the 80s two F-16s at the base 

NOTE: To plural a number that is used as part of a noun, place the s on the noun and not the 

number: DD Forms 282; but “file the 282s.” 

WORD STYLE 

5. Spell out numbers from 1 through 9; use figures for numbers 10 and above in ordinary 

correspondence. 

I need nine copies of this article. 

At the conference, we got over 11 comments to start a new ... 

6. Spell out numbers that introduce sentences. A spelled out number should not be repeated 

in figures (except in legal documents).

Twelve people volunteered for the job; not twelve (12) people ... 

Eight children participated in the relay race. 

7. Related numbers appearing at the beginning of a sentence, separated by no more than 

three words, are treated alike. 

Fifty or sixty miles away is Auburn University. 

Five to ten people will probably respond. 

NOTE: Related numbers in the same set are also treated alike. 

The $12,000,000 building had a $500,000 tower. [Not written as $12 million because of its relation to 

 $500,000.] 

We mailed 50 invitations and only received 5 RSVPs. 

8. Spell out numbers in formal writing and numbers used in proper names and titles along 

with serious and dignified subjects such as executive orders and legal proclamations. 

the Thirteen Colonies the first Ten Amendments 

The Seventy-eighth Congress threescore years and ten 

– 334 –
Numbers

9. Spell out fractions that stand alone except with unit modifier. 

one-half of the vote; but 1/2-inch pipe (unit modifier) or 1⁄2-inch pipe 

six-tenths of a mile

NOTE: A mixed number (a whole number plus a fraction) is written in figures except at the 

beginning of a sentence. 

1 1/2 miles; 11⁄2 miles; not 1-1/2 miles One and a half miles 

10. Spell out compound modifiers and numbers of 100 or less that precede hyphenated 

numbers. 

three 10-foot poles 120 1-gallon cans 

one hundred 1-gallon cans twenty 5-year-old children 

three 1 1/2-inch pipes; three 11⁄2-inch pipes two 4-hour sorties 

11. Spell out rounded and indefinite numbers. 

the early nineties; but the early 1990s the twentieth century

hundreds of customers nineteenth-century business customs 

a woman in her fifties approximately six thousand soldiers 

12. For typographic appearance and easy grasp of large numbers beginning with million, 

use words to indicate the amount rather than 0s (unless used with a related number). 

$12 million less than $1 million 

$6,000,000 and later 300,000 ... 2 1/2 billion or 21⁄2 billion 

$2.7 trillion $300,000 (not $300 thousand) 

13. Form the plurals of spelled-out numbers as you would the plurals of other nouns—by 

adding s, es or changing the y to i and adding es. 

ones twenties 

twos fifties 

sixes nineties 

STRIKE A BLOW FOR FREEDOM!! 

Are all these rules making you numb? Why don’t we put some sense in this silly nonsense and 

take it upon ourselves as rational men and women to make our own rule that will let us win at 

this numbers game. How about ... 

“Always express numbers as figures unless the number starts the sentence, 

or unless the use of figures would confuse the reader ... or would look weird.” 

 —The Quill’s Law of Numerical Bingo 

The simplicity of it is downright ingenious. Think how many pages out of the inconsistent 

grammar books we could eliminate. Save a forest! Be a leader! 

– 335 –
The Tongue and Quill

ROMAN NUMERALS 

Roman numerals are used most frequently to identify the major sections of an outline. They’re 

also used (in lowercase form and in italics—i, ii, iii) to number pages in the front sections of 

books. The following table shows Roman numerals for some Arabic figures. 

A dash above a letter tells you to multiply by 1,000. 

ROMAN NUMERALS

I .................1 XXIX..........29 LXXV ..............75 DC ................600 

II................2 XXX...........30 LXXIX.............79 DCC..............700 

III ..............3 XXXV........35 LXXX ..............80 DCCC...........800 

IV ..............4 XXXIX.......39 LXXXV............85 CM................900 

V................5 XL ..............40 LXXXIX ..........89 M ...............1,000 

VI ..............6 XLV ...........45 XC....................90 MD.............1,500 

VII.............7 XLIX..........49 XCV.................95 MM............2,000 ___ 

VIII............8 L.................50 XCIX................99 MV.............4,000 ___ 

IX ..............9 LV ..............55 C.....................100 V ................5,000 ___ 

X..............10 LIX.............59 CL ..................150 X ..............10,000 ___ 

XV...........15 LX ..............60 CC ..................200 L...............50,000 ___ 

XIX .........19 LXV ...........65 CCC................300 C ............100,000 ___ 

XX...........20 LXIX..........69 CD..................400 D ............500,000 ___ 

XXV........25 LXX ...........70 D.....................500 M ........1,000,000 

DATES 

 1600 - MDC 1997 - MCMXCVII 

 1900 - MCM 2000 - MM 

Other combinations of Roman numerals are derived by prefixing or annexing letters. Prefixing a 

letter is equivalent to subtracting the value of that letter, while annexing is equivalent to adding 

the value. 

49 is L minus X plus IX: XLIX 

64 is L plus X plus IV: LXIV 

– 336 –
re•search n 1: to search or APPENDIX 2 

investigate a problem

thoroughly. 2: studious

inquiry or examination; esp: 

investigation or 

experimentation aimed at the 

discovery and interpretation

of facts, revision of accepted 

theories or laws in the light

of new facts, or practical 

application of such new or

revised theories or laws.

THE 

MECHANICS 

OF RESEARCH 

This appendix covers: 

• Getting started: planning your research schedule 

• Defining the research problem and stating the research question. 

• Reviewing the related literature. 

• Research citations, quotations, and paraphrases 

• Research methodology: qualitative and quantitative methods 

Research is a structured and systematic way to create knowledge. Research searches for facts 

with a purpose in mind. Kuhn said research is like solving a puzzle: you have to follow specific 

rules, and the challenge of putting the puzzle together to get a complete picture is what usually 

motivates the researcher.1

 This appendix provides a summary of research issues Air Force 

members may encounter either during their assignments or during their professional military 

education. It also provides samples of citation formats used in research papers, including 

endnotes, footnotes, and textnotes. 

– 337 – 
The Tongue and Quill 

GETTING STARTED: PLANNING YOUR RESEARCH SCHEDULE 

“Don’t put off for tomorrow what you can do today, because if you 

enjoy it today you can do it again tomorrow.” 

 – James A. Michener 

At first research may seem like a tedious and complex process. Actually though, some

researchers find that once they begin to pursue a research question they are interested in, they 

really begin to enjoy the process. Do not let the idea of writing a huge paper keep you from

getting started. As Henry Ford said “Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small 

jobs.” 

Here are some tips on getting yourself going: 

• Don’t wait to get started until you can set aside two or three entire days to do your research. 

This is one task you want to do in a few sittings and not all at once. If you keep waiting for the 

“perfect” time to get started, you may never get anything done at all. 

• Create an overall plan for what you want to accomplish and when you want to have each step 

done. For example, here is a proposed research process broken down into manageable chunks: 

Task Desired Date Actual Date 

Topic selected 

Research question written 

Methodology selected 

Sources and data gathered 

Sources read and data analyzed 

Outline created 

Expand outline to draft all topic sentences 

First draft written 

Second draft written 

Final draft written to include front matter 

(abstract, preface) and back matter 

(endnotes, bibliography) 

Seek publication if appropriate 

Back up your milestones from whatever due dates you are given to allow for a little “slop” time 

and then reward yourself for any deadlines you meet. (Bribery does work—even if you are 

bribing yourself.) 

• Not all tasks associated with research need to be done in the quiet of a library with an 8-hour 

stretch of time. Break your research-related tasks down into chunks and work them in when and 

where you can. For example, you don’t necessarily need to devote an entire day to reading 

articles. Instead you can carry a few with you to read when you get stuck waiting somewhere. 

– 338 –
The Mechanics of Research 

• If your research involves a survey or an experiment that requires the collection of data 

involving people, be sure that you get proper approval before you get started. This can take up a 

bit of time, so the earlier you do this the better. 

“If you want to make an easy job seem mighty hard, just keep putting off doing it.” 

 – Olin Miller 

SELECTING A RESEARCHABLE PROBLEM 

Research starts with the selection of the problem. This can be harder than it sounds because not 

every problem may be researchable. For some problems it can be impossible to collect the data 

to support it. On the other hand, it’s easy to become lost in data that is easy to collect and lose 

sight of the original question. Carr listed three laws to help define researchable problems: 

1. The problem should be clearly formulated in a single 

sentence of 25 words or less. (Otherwise you could find 

yourself working with no direction and go off onto 

irrelevant tangents.) 

What is NOT an appropriate 

research question? 

1. A ruse for achieving selfenlightenment. 

2. Problems where the sole purpose 

is comparing two sets of data. 

3. Problems seeking correlation 

between two sets of data merely to

show a relationship between them. 

4. Problems with a “yes” or “no”

answer. 

SOURCE: Leedy’s Practical

Research, pp 47-48. 

2. You should be able to collect useful empirical data 

with observable and accessible criteria. Wherever 

possible that data should be numerical. 

3. You should be able to directly, or indirectly, observe 

the events you plan to collect data about.2

 

These three simple rules should be followed as closely 

as possible whenever a problem is selected. 

Another challenge in defining a problem is making it 

“not too big and not too small.” Barzun and Graff 

discussed how your subject should, “when clearly 

presented in a prescribed amount of space, leave no 

questions unanswered within the presentation, even though many questions could be asked 

outside it.”3

 Though this can be difficult, following these rules will prevent serious problems

later on in the research process. Ideally, the problem you select to research will be one that you 

are interested in. The longer the research paper you will be writing, the more important this is. 

If you are writing a 5-page paper you can usually slog through almost any topic, but if this is 

your doctorate dissertation it better be something you feel passionate enough about to attack 

daily for a year or more. 

STATING THE RESEARCH QUESTION 

Once the problem has been decided, the next step is to articulate it concisely and clearly in a 

research question. 

1. Name your topic: I am studying ... 

2. Imply your question: Because I want to find out/show you who/how/why ... 

– 339 –
The Tongue and Quill 

3. State the rationale for the question and the project: In order to understand/explain 

how/why/what ... 

Once you have your focus narrowed, and you know just what you want to study, it is time to 

begin the hunt for what others have written on the same, or similar, subjects. 

REVIEWING AND CITING THE RELATED LITERATURE 

“Read the best books first, or you may not have a chance to read them at all.” 

 – Henry David Thoreau 

Once you have your research question solidified, start your literature 

review as soon as possible. One reason to search the related 

literature right away is to make sure that someone else hasn’t already 

researched the same topic. Keep in mind that if someone has already 

done the study you would like to do, you can still check their 

conclusions to see if they have recommended an area of further 

research. Also, check the date of their study. If it was quite some

time ago, replicating their study with a few new twists just might 

expose some interesting conclusions. 

Read All About It! 

Quotations 

Paraphrases 

Copyright 

Footnote 

Endnote 

Bibliography 

Formatting

 

There are several other reasons to conduct a thorough literature review: 

• It will increase your confidence in your topic.... 

• It can provide you with new ideas and approaches.... 

• It can inform you about other researchers whom you may wish to contact.... 

• It can show you how others have handled methodological and design issues.... 

• It can reveal sources of data.... 

• It can introduce you to measurement tools other researchers have developed.... 

• It can reveal methods of dealing with problem situations.... 

• It can help you interpret and make sense of your findings....4

One major way to save time is to record all your source data properly from the start. There 

are several ways to gather your data as you review the related literature. You can use oldfashioned pen, ink, and note cards. You could take a laptop along and type your notes right in. 

Or you can purchase or photocopy everything. Note cards are convenient in that you can arrange 

your thoughts in order as you get ready to write. You can also do the same thing with computer 

notes by printing out your notes, cutting them into strips and then arranging them as you see fit. 

Just make sure that each line, or paragraph, has a source and page number before you start to cut 

up your notes pages. One big benefit of typing your notes on a computer is that you can copy 

and paste quotes right from your notes to your paper. If you can afford it, purchasing or 

photocopying your sources can be useful. This is especially true if you plan to do further 

research on the same topic. Being able to refer back to the original source for more information 

can be very helpful. 

– 340 –
The Mechanics of Research 

No matter how you capture your source data, be sure 

to include the details of where you got them. This is 

especially important if you are using sources from

several different libraries and need to track one back 

down again. Another important thing to remember if 

you are typing or writing notes is to distinguish 

clearly between what is a direct quote, what is a 

paraphrase, and what are your own words and 

thoughts. If you don’t indicate the difference now, 

while you initially type them in, you will forget and 

then run the risk of plagiarism.

5

 

Read The Original 

Wherever possible, you should try to read

original works instead of someone’s 

interpretation of another work. One rule 

is that if three others have cited the same

source, you should probably hunt it down 

and read the original work yourself.

SOURCE: Paul D. Leedy & Jeanne Ellis 

Ormrod, Practical Research; Planning and 

Design (Upper Saddle River, NJ: Merrill 

Prentice Hall, 2001), 76.

“Our two greatest problems are gravity and paperwork. We can lick gravity, but sometimes the 

paperwork is overwhelming.” 

 – Dr. Wernher von Braun 

CITATIONS 

In the staff environment, we frequently reuse previously prepared data to save time and avoid 

“reinventing the wheel,” but we rarely need to cite the source of such data. In the academic 

world, however, reusing another’s work without giving that person credit and deliberately trying 

to pass it off as your own, is plagiarism and can get you into a heap of trouble. 

When and where do you document sources? The rule is simple: If the ideas and information 

in what you’ve written are not “common knowledge” or do not represent your own work, 

you must document where and from whom the “borrowed” ideas and information came. 

As a writer, when you quote an authority word for word, paraphrase someone’s thoughts or use 

someone’s ideas, model, diagram, research results, etc., you need to do so at that point in the 

text. This is referred to as citation. Citation refers to one of several types of systems writers use 

to document their sources. The signals for citation may be footnotes, in-line notes or endnotes. 

Whatever the system, the purpose is to flag material for which the writer is indebted and to 

identify the source. The sum of all citations in a paper, together with the bibliography, is the 

documentation system of the paper. Citation, if done properly, fulfills a writer’s responsibility 

for maintaining academic integrity. So, to keep yourself out of a literary (and perhaps legal) 

jam—give credit where credit is due and cite those sources! 

Each community has its own standards for citations. This section relies very heavily on the Air 

University Style Guide for Writers and Editors, which can be accessed at 

http://www.maxwell.af.mil/au/aul/aupress/. 

– 341 –
The Tongue and Quill 

QUOTATIONS 

Plagiarism—HOW TO AVOID IT

• Be aware of where your eyes are when

you type and/or write: source or your 

page?

• Realize when you rely heavily on a 

source: re-writing what you see?

• Compare your work with sources: same

words/phrases as in source?

• Take good notes, note page references:

check your work later 

SOURCE: Booth, Colomb & Williams, The

Craft of Research, 170.

A quotation (also called a direct quotation) occurs when a writer is indebted to a source not only 

for the source’s ideas or facts but also for the wording of those ideas. When you are using a 

portion of a source word-for-word you must indicate so by using either quotation marks or a 

block quote. For shorter quotations, keep them in the text and simply enclose the words you are 

using from another source in double quotation 

marks (see the example below). Different styleguides have different criteria for how long a quote 

needs to be before you pull it out of the text and 

create a “block quotation.” According to the Air 

University Style Guide for Writers and Editors, you 

should use a block quotation, “for passages easily 

set apart from the text, 10 or more typed lines, or 

exceeding one paragraph. Indent from both sides 

and single-space. Do not use quotation marks to 

enclose the block quotation, and do not indent its 

paragraphs. Use double quotation marks to enclose 

a direct quotation within a block quotation. Skip a 

line between paragraphs. The block quotation 

should reflect the paragraphing of the original.”6

 (That was also an example of an in-text 

quotation.) If you are using quite a bit from a copyrighted work, you need to get written 

permission from the copyright holder. The Air University Style Guide also offers the following 

advice on direct quotations: (note that the quote below is an example of the block quote format) 

1. You may change single quotation marks to double quotation marks and vice 

versa, if necessary. 

2. You may change the initial letter to a capital or lowercase letter. 

3. You may omit the final period or change it to a comma, and you may omit 

punctuation marks where you insert ellipsis points. 

4. You should usually omit original note-reference marks in a short quotation 

from a scholarly work. You may insert note references of your own within 

quotations. 

5. You may correct an obvious typographical error in a passage quoted from a 

modern source, but you should usually preserve idiosyncratic spellings in a 

passage from an older work or manuscript source unless doing so would impair 

clarity. You should inform the reader of any such alterations, usually in a note.7

It is good to set the stage for every quote you use and then provide closure after each quote by 

showing how it relates back to the main point of your paper. Quotes just hanging there, without 

any stage setting or closure, can make your paper sound choppy and disjointed. What you want 

is a product that flows seamlessly between what the experts say (quotes) and the conclusions and 

creative recommendations you can draw from what they say. 

– 342 –
The Mechanics of Research 

PARAPHRASE 

Paraphrase is a restatement of a text, passage, or work, giving the meaning in another form. It is 

not simply changing a couple of words or putting them in a different order. A paraphrase falls 

into a gray area between summary and quotation. Where a summary uses only the source’s 

content, but not its words, a paraphrase uses the source’s content stated in words and sentence 

structure that are similar to—but not exactly like—the source’s. If you do paraphrase, always 

cite the source (and the appropriate page numbers). 

There is no simple answer to the problem of deciding how many words you may use from a 

source before you are required to show you are quoting. A complete sentence taken from the 

source would certainly have to be treated as a quotation. But even a single word might have to 

be quoted, especially if it is a new technical word introduced or developed by the source. The 

Air University Style Guide says, “Ideally, you should introduce your paraphrase so that the reader 

has no question at all about where your own commentary ends and where your paraphrase 

begins.”8

 

All in all, you need to make sure your research report consists of much more than just a string of 

quotes and paraphrases from other sources. It would be very inappropriate for example to put a 

citation mark next to a chapter heading to indicate that everything in an entire chapter of your 

research paper came from another source. (Yes, someone has tried to do that!) If you have that 

much from a single source, and if it really is key to understanding your research, then you can 

put it word-for-word in an appendix and cite the source there. Remember that research is not just 

a compilation and regurgitation of others’ thoughts—your own thoughts need to be evident too. 

COPYRIGHTS!

What is a copyright? A copyright is the exclusive 

legal right granted under Title 17, US Code, to the 

author of an original published or unpublished work 

(literary, dramatic, musical, artistic, and certain other 

intellectual works) to copy and send copies (paper or 

electronic), to make derivative works, and to perform

or display certain types of works publicly. 

Research papers, or any other written

material produced as part of your 

official government duties, are not

subject to copyright protection, and 

are the property of the United States 

Government. 

What are your rights and limitations? Ownership of the copyright is distinct from 

ownership of the material object (book, periodical, photograph, record, video or audio recording, 

music, etc.) in which the work is included. The owner is the boss—the head honcho who allows 

(or not) the work to be performed or displayed publicly. Be careful to not trespass on someone 

else’s property or step on anyone’s toes. However, there are exceptions that allow the use of the 

owner’s work without requesting permission or obtaining a license. Find your organization’s 

expert to keep you out of hot water ... or jail! 

– 343 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Can you make changes? You will not get your hand slapped for making minor style 

changes. But the changes, individually or cumulatively, should not significantly change the 

context or its meaning. Minor changes are only allowed to let you fit the work smoothly into the 

syntax and typography style of the product. 

HOW TO CITE YOUR SOURCES 

Footnotes, textnotes and endnotes are three common citation methods used to indicate where you 

got your information. For more extensive coverage of these and other methods, consult the style 

manuals such as The Air University Style Guide, The Chicago Manual of Style, or The American 

Psychological Association Style Guide. There are certainly plenty of style guides to choose 

from, but the Air University Style Guide for Writers and Editors is not only free from Air 

University Press, it is also available on-line.1

 Whatever style you choose within a particular 

document, be consistent. 

1 FOOTNOTES

With today’s computers, using footnotes is much easier than it used to be with a typewriter. If

you are using footnotes, each footnote should appear on the same page you refer to it. 

Sometimes you might want to include more than just source data in the footnote. Keep in mind 

that a page containing more footnote material than text not only is unpleasant to the eye, but also 

may discourage all but the most determined reader. 

Most computer programs have an option where you can choose to insert a footnote and it takes 

care of all the formatting for you, to include keeping the numbering straight—even if you move 

text around while editing. In Word, you can jump back and forth between the text and the 

citation by double-clicking on the footnote number. You simply can’t beat having the computer 

do all the work for you, but if you do have to put footnotes in manually, they should be 

underneath a flush left, five-eighth inch line, that has at least one space above. Also, use an 8-

point font size. Single-space within each footnote and also between each footnote. Footnotes 

look just like endnotes (described next), except they are at the bottom of each page—just like the 

one below. 

2 ENDNOTES

For an example of endnotes, check out the end of this chapter. The Air University Style Guide 

for Writers and Editors has other examples for a wide variety of sources.

Endnotes can be placed at the end of each chapter, or at the very end of the manuscript. Endnote 

numbers may run consecutively from beginning to end of the manuscript, or they may begin 

again with each new chapter. The typed format for endnotes included at the very end of the 

manuscript differs slightly in that chapter numbers could be included too. 

The computer can set up your endnote formatting in the same way it does footnotes. In Word, 

when you select “Insert” and “Footnote,” a menu pops up where you can choose between 

footnotes and endnotes. You can also specify where you want the endnotes to go, at the end of 

the section or the entire document. If your endnotes aren’t going where you want them to go, 

 

1

 Marvin Bassett, ed., Air University Style Guide (Maxwell AFB AL: Air University Press, 2001), 11. Web site 

http://www.au.af.mil/au/awc/awcgate/style/styleguide.pdf

– 344 –
The Mechanics of Research 

you may need to insert (or remove) a section break. For example, sometimes they will appear 

after your bibliography, which is incorrect. In this case, put a section break before the 

bibliography. If you are creating endnotes manually, start on the page where you want your 

endnotes to appear and center the word “Notes” 1 inch from the top of the page or double-spaced 

below any text on the same page. Triple-space between the heading and the first text entry. 

Number each entry and arrange in numbered sequence as superscript numbers in text. Singlespace within each entry as well as between entries. Indent each numbered entry one-half inch 

from left margin with subsequent lines flush left. When including chapter numbers, center 

“Chapter #” on the third line below “Notes” and begin the list two line spaces underneath. 

3 TEXTNOTES 

Textnoting is a means of identifying a source parenthetically at the appropriate point within the 

text. This method can be accomplished two ways. One way is to show the source within the 

text. For example: 

Samuel Huntington, in his book The Soldier and the State, observed, “The outstanding aspect of civilmilitary relations in the decade after World War II was the heightened and persistent peacetime tension 

between military imperatives and American liberal society.” 

Another way is to provide only the source name and page number in the text and prepare a 

bibliography page containing the complete source identification. When the bibliography 

contains more than one entry by the same author, include the date in your textnote to ensure the 

reader refers to the proper source. 

The definition of analysis (Motes: 23-31) used is ... 

The definition of analysis (Motes, 1997: 23-31) ... 

Remember your audience when you are deciding which citation format to use. If you are writing 

for a school assignment, your school probably has a specific way they want you to cite your 

sources. If you are writing to seek publication, check with your target publications for their 

preferred style and format before you get started. If you are really serious about publishing 

widely, there are computer programs available which will convert your document from one style 

guide to another which may be worth the investment. 

BIBLIOGRAPHY 

A bibliography is an accurate list of all sources used to prepare your research manuscript. This 

means there could be sources in your bibliography that do not appear in your endnotes, 

footnotes, or textnotes. On the other hand, everything you have cited in your notes should 

definitely be in the bibliography. One way to prepare your bibliography is to copy all your 

endnotes and/or footnotes into the bibliography section once you are done writing your paper, 

and then put them in alphabetical order. However, you still aren’t done. Take a close look at the 

differences in some style guides between the endnote and/or footnote format and the 

bibliography format. For example, these are the differences for citing the same source according 

to the AU Style Guide: 

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The Tongue and Quill 

Bibliography:

Leedy, Paul D. Practical Research. New York, N.Y.: Macmillan Publishing Co., 1989. 

Footnote and/or Endnote:

Paul D. Leedy, Practical Research (New York, N.Y.: Macmillan Publishing Co., 1989), 112. 

That is just enough difference to drive you crazy, huh? One time-saver is to cite your sources in 

the correct format from the very start of your literature review. The last thing you want to do 

after spending lots of time on the text of your paper, is to have to go back to hunt down 

information that would have been really easy to collect the first time you looked at the data. 

This means you shouldn’t just photocopy articles and stash them away hoping all of the 

information you want will be on the photocopied page. Make sure the volume number, journal 

title, page numbers, author, etc., are all captured somehow. Usually you need to look at the very 

front of some journals to find the volume number. This can be very easy to overlook, so if you 

have a comprehensive and structured process to capture all the pertinent details on each and 

every source you use, you will save yourself lots of trouble as you tie up the loose ends of your 

research. 

GUIDE TO TYPING A BIBLIOGRAPHY 

An example of the bibliography format is at the end of this book. Hopefully you will be building 

your entire research report off of a research paper template that lays everything out for you. In 

the event you are building all of this manually, here are some ideas to get you started. 

♦ Use bond paper and center “Bibliography” 1 inch from top edge. 

♦ Triple space between the heading and your first entry; single-space within each entry and 

double space between entries. 

♦ Begin each entry at the left margin and indent subsequent lines five spaces. 

♦ Arrange entries alphabetically, listing author’s name in reverse order (last name, first name, 

middle initial). When no author is named and a title is used, omit initial articles—a, an and 

the—use the first major word of the title to alphabetize. If the title begins with a number, 

alphabetize as though the number is spelled out (76 Trombones would be alphabetized by the 

letter s). 

♦ When you list two or more works by the same author, do not repeat the author’s name. Use a 

line three dashes long for all entries after the first. List the works for the same author 

alphabetically by title. 

♦ Items that involve a coauthor follow the works written by the first author alone. 

♦ Set off titles of magazine articles in quotes and italicize the name of the periodical in which 

the article appeared. Follow with a volume number (may be the month and year) and date of 

issue in parentheses with page(s). 

♦ Italicize a published report title just as a book title. Also, if there is no author, show the 

agency responsible for the report. Continue as you would for a book. If an organization is 

the author, alphabetize by organization name. 

♦ While the AU Style Guide says it is not necessary to include interviews in a bibliography,9 it 

can add to the credibility of your paper. You should make sure you have the interviewee’s 

signed consent and they have checked over their parts of your text. List an interview with the 

names of the interviewee and the interviewer (“author” is used for the name of the author of

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The Mechanics of Research 

the book or article in which the interview is listed), the place and date of the interview and, if 

possible, where it is stored. 

♦ Even e-mails can and should be cited appropriately.10 

The Air University Style Guide has page after page of examples, so if you are in doubt about how 

to cite something, be sure to check there or with another style guide. 

WRITING STYLE 

For some reason some people think that research papers must be written at a level that is above 

the complexity of day-to-day writing. This is not so. Here is an example of an abstract with 

clear writing:

“We had some fun with a stacking rings toy and learned 

something about how the perceptions of adults are different f

those of babies.”

rom 11

Compare that abstract with this one, which has been a bit 

“beefed-up.” 

“The stacking properties of toroids that reflect radiation in the 

1.8 to 2.8 eV energy range is investigated. Preliminary results 

indicate that in the optimal configuration the toroids are oriented

vertically with those reflecting lower energy photons having

larger gravitational potential energies for toroids of equal mass. The ambiguousness of this solution is

tested by experiments performed by a relatively inexperienced researcher 

(t= 0.9167 yr). These experiments indicate that alternate solutions can be found.”12

They both say the same thing; one just says it much more clearly than the other. Please don’t 

think of your research report as an opportunity to throw together as many multisyllabic words as 

you can possibly think of. Remember, you will have to read this over a few times yourself. 

FORMATTING ISSUES 

One way to help your paper appear organized is through effective use of headings. In order to 

make sure you are consistent with your main points, the size and style of your headings and 

should follow what the introduction says the paper is going to cover and clearly indicate which 

of the issues are the most important. One of the ways to do this is to match up your outline with 

the appropriate heading levels. 

Level One – Centered, bold, 16-font 

Level Two – Centered, bold, 14-font 

Level Three – Flush Left, Bold, 12-font 

Level Four - Flush Left, Bold, 12-font. Followed immediately by text. 

If possible, do not “stack headings” with one immediately following another, instead make sure 

some text separates your headings.13

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The Tongue and Quill 

Now that you know how to capture your sources, ideas, and thoughts—one last consideration is 

what methodology you use to collect, process and analyze your data. 

INTRODUCTION TO RESEARCH METHODOLOGY 

What is methodology? One good way to start is by describing what methodology is not. 

Methodology is not a running dialogue of how you did your research!! Methodology simply 

provides a structured way of gathering and analyzing your data. 

There are as many different ways to group the research 

methods together as there are research methods 

themselves, but most of them fall into two main 

categories: qualitative and quantitative. Some research 

will even use a mix of the two so don’t confine yourself 

to just one category. One of the major differences 

between these different research methods is how much 

control the researcher has over the situation. This 

section will briefly survey a few of these methods, 

beginning with the ones where the researcher has little 

control and working up to experiments where the 

researcher has a great deal of control. 

QUALITATIVE RESEARCH METHODS 

Qualitative research tends to focus on studying things 

that occur in natural settings.14 Qualitative methods fall 

into two main categories: one is the historical method 

and the other is a general category which includes case 

studies, ethnography, phenomenological study, 

grounded theory study and content analysis. 

THE HISTORICAL METHOD

Methods

I. Qualitative Research Methods 

 A. The Historical Method 

 B. General Qualitative 

 Methods 

 1. Case Study 

 2. Ethnography 

 3. Phenomenological 

 Study 

 4. Grounded Theory Study 

 5. Content Analysis 

II. Quantitative Research Methods 

 A. Nonexperimental Methods 

 1. Descriptive Survey 

 2 Analytical Survey 

 B. Experimental Method 

The historical method is one of the most commonly used research methods, and it is the only one 

available for studying the past. It “aims to assess the meaning and to read the message of the 

happenings in which men and women, the events of their lives, and the life of the world around 

them relate meaningfully to each other.”15 Historical research is much much more than listing 

events in chronological order, or restating historical data in a new and different format. This 

concept can be lost on students who mistakenly view research as nothing more than a beefed-up 

book report. The key element in the historical method’s search for meaning requires the 

researcher to interpret what may have appeared to be simply chance. This method pulls together 

both things that are commonly known by the well educated, and also any special information that 

may be relevant to the historical question being studied. In order to help provide stronger 

conclusions, primary sources should be used as much as possible to increase the validity of the 

data. Unfortunately, in the historical research design the researcher has absolutely no control 

over the collection of the data, the subjects, or even anything that happened at the time the events 

took place. This can make it hard to be sure all of the needed data has been found, if the data on 

hand is accurate, and if or how much of the data has been distorted or destroyed. 

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The Mechanics of Research 

The researcher using the historical method does not need to look at history only from a time 

dimension, but can also look at it from the dimension of where things happened.16 By arranging 

historical data in different ways, such as on timelines, charts, or a map, new insights can be 

found to help find new meaning in the data. 

Also, historical research does not restrict itself to just the study of events and people from the 

past. This methodology is also useful for exploring the origin, development and influence of 

ideas and concepts.17 This is where the power of the historical research methodology lies. The 

ideas and concepts explored through this methodology could have as strong an influence on their 

ages as the rise or fall of a nation or civilization and would be powerful lessons to pull from

history to help carry us into the future.18 

GENERAL QUALITATIVE METHODS

In addition to the historical method, there are several other qualitative methods. 

CASE STUDY

Case studies seek to understand a person or a situation in depth.19 For example, someone could 

study in great detail the transition of a unit from one aircraft to another. You could do this by 

focusing on just one case, or make an even stronger analysis by looking at multiple cases and 

making comparisons between them. This is a good method to use if little is known about a 

situation or if you want to look at how things change over time.20 Unfortunately, this method is 

not strong when it comes to being able to generalize the results. 

ETHNOGRAPHY

Ethnographies are broader than case studies since they study entire groups in depth, particularly 

groups that share a common culture.21 For example, instead of looking at one unit transitioning 

from one aircraft to another, a researcher could use this method to study the entire fighter pilot 

community. In this method, the researcher studies the group in their natural setting over a period 

of months, possibly even years, “with an intent to identify cultural norms, beliefs, social 

structures, and other cultural patterns.”22 This method was first used in cultural anthropology, 

but is just as applicable in today’s organizational cultures. 

PHENOMENOLOGICAL STUDY 

A phenomenological study attempts to “understand people’s perceptions, perspectives, and 

understandings of a particular situation” by looking at several different views of the same

situation to make generalizations about what that situation is like.23 This research method 

depends heavily on interviews. For example, the individuals who transitioned from one aircraft 

to another could be interviewed to see what the change meant for them. 

GROUNDED THEORY STUDY 

This method is interesting in that it is the reverse of most research methods, which normally 

begin with a theory and test it with data. A grounded theory study begins with the data and uses 

the data to develop a theory, and is “typically used to examine people’s actions and 

interactions.”

24 

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The Tongue and Quill 

CONTENT ANALYSIS 

Content analysis takes the contents of a body of material such as books, films, transcripts, and 

searches for themes and patterns.25 This method could be used to determine how much violence 

appears on TV in any given day, and describe what type of violent acts appear most frequently. 

This challenging task of sorting through mounds of data is now easier with computer programs 

that can help do this quickly. This method is being used more and more and in combination with 

other methods. 

QUANTITATIVE RESEARCH METHODS 

In quantitative research, numbers, and statistical analysis play a larger role, and the ability to 

generalize results is somewhat stronger than most qualitative methods. Quantitative research 

methods can be divided into two major categories: nonexperimental and experimental. 

NONEXPERIMENTAL RESEARCH METHODS

In nonexperimental research methods, the researcher only controls the measurement of the item

under study. Both the descriptive and analytical survey methods are examples of this kind of 

research. 

THE DESCRIPTIVE SURVEY METHOD 

The descriptive survey method uses data obtained through observation. 

While historical data is used to explore events of the past, survey research

looks at things as they are happening. A descriptive survey investigates 

things as they are without interfering with them. 

“Survey” is used

here to mean, “to 

look, or see over or

beyond.” 

There are three basic forms of surveys: 

retrospective, current, and prospective. A 

retrospective survey reaches back into the past to 

find out how things used to be. A current survey 

looks at things the way they are now. And a 

prospective survey selects a population and follows 

it for a period of time into the future to see what 

changes take place. Retrospective surveys have 

some problems in that the data may be incomplete 

or even missing. Current surveys, which are used 

most often, are used to determine things like current 

attitudes towards specific issues. Prospective 

surveys do the same thing, but are conducted on the 

population more than once. This type of long-term

study is not done as often as other studies are, 

mainly due to time and cost constraints. 

The questionnaire should be a “totally 

impersonal probe” which means the 

researcher must take several precautions 

when using this tool including:

1. The language must be unmistakably

clear. 

2. Questionnaires should be designed to

fulfill a specific research objective. 

3. Questionnaires succeed as their success is

planned.

4. The initial letter is all-important. 

SOURCE: Leedy’s Practical Research, 1989, 

pp 142-146. 

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The Mechanics of Research 

There are several different tools for the actual collection of the data, including questionnaires, 

interviews, and the differential sliding scale checklist or inventory. 

When using any survey method, setting the proper 

population and using the appropriate, deliberate sampling 

procedures are essential to produce trustworthy results. 

Accidental sampling, such as asking questions to the first 

five folks who walk in each day, makes absolutely no 

pretense of being representative of a population and makes 

no attempt to control for personal bias. Quota sampling 

selects respondents in the same ratios as they are found in the 

overall population being researched. What is essential is the 

process of randomization that is used to choose from the 

overall population. This concept of randomization and the 

elimination of bias are the two most important elements in 

successful survey research. 

Quick Reference 

Sampling Table

Total 

Number 

in SubPopulation 

Number of

people to be

surveyed 

1-5 All

6-7 5

8-9 6

10-12 7

13-16 8

17-20 9

21-30 10

31-49 11

50-99 12

100 14

200 21

500 40

1,000 75

2,000 78

5,000 80

10,000 81

SOURCE: Wilkerson & Kellogg, 

1994, 14. 

THE ANALYTICAL SURVEY METHOD

The analytical survey method is different because it relies 

more on quantitative data as opposed to qualitative data. This 

means where the descriptive survey method relies on 

describing a situation through words, the analytical survey 

method interprets situations through numerical data. Even 

though many descriptive survey methods will use some

numbers, the calculations are not the major form in which 

data exists in analytical survey research.26 In the analytical 

survey method, the researcher is analyzing a set of data to 

test a hypothesis and to look for meanings that may be 

hidden within the data. Once the data is gathered, statistics 

play a very large role in their interpretation. 

How do statistics help interpret data?

1. Indicate the central point around which the data revolve. 

2. Indicate how broadly the data are spread. 

3. Show the relationship of one kind of data to another kind of

data. 

4. Provide certain techniques to test the degree to which the 

data conform to or depart from the expected operations of the 

law of chance or approximate an anticipated standard. 

SOURCE: Leedy’s Practical Research, p 186. 

The biggest difference between the nonexperimental and experimental methods of research is 

survey research does not include the same highly controlled aspects of experimental research. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

THE EXPERIMENTAL METHOD

There are many different subsets of the experimental method, but a common characteristic is the 

level of control the researcher has over both the event and the ability to collect data on the event. 

An experiment is a contrived event where the effect of a deliberate act is observed. One of the 

main purposes of experimental research is to determine cause-and-effect relationships. 

Unfortunately, some study results can be weakened because the artificial nature of their 

experiments makes the results too different from what might turn out in a natural setting. 

One of the most important aspects of the experimental method is effectively planning the design 

of the experiment—not just how the data will be interpreted, but the entire experimental design.27 

One key concept involves independent and dependent variables. “A variable that the researcher 

manipulates is called an independent variable. A variable that is potentially influenced by the 

independent variable is called a dependent variable, because it is influenced by, and thus to 

some extent depends on, the independent variable.”28 If we were testing a new medication to 

reduce headaches for example, the drug itself would be the independent variable and the 

headaches, which hopefully will be reduced or eliminated by the drug, would be the dependent 

variable—the headaches would depend on the medication. 

METHODOLOGIES IN A NUTSHELL 

When trying to choose between quantitative and qualitative methods, it is important to take 

several things into consideration—to include your interests. Table 1 gives some good guidelines 

of what to take into consideration. 

Table 1. Research Methodology Guidelines 

Use this approach if: Quantitative Qualitative 

1. You believe that: There is an objective reality that 

can be measured 

There are multiple possible 

realities constructed by different

individuals

2. Your audience is: Familiar with/supportive of 

quantitative studies 

Familiar with/supportive of 

qualitative studies 

3. Your research question is: Confirmatory, predictive Exploratory, interpretive 

4. The available literature is: Relatively large Limited

5. Your research focus: Covers a lot of breadth Involves in-depth study 

6. Your time available is: Relatively short Relatively long

7. Your ability/desire to work

with people is:

Medium to low High

8. Your desire for structure is: High Low 

9. You have skills in the area(s) 

of:

Deductive reasoning and statistics Inductive reasoning and attention

to detail 

10. Your writing skills are 

strong in the area of: 

Technical, scientific writing Literary, narrative writing

SOURCE: Leedy, Paul D, and Jeanne Ellis Ormrod, Practical Research; Planning and Design (Upper Saddle River, NJ: Merrill 

Prentice Hall, 2001), 112. 

College students spend entire semesters studying the intricacies of the various research methods 

and this appendix has only briefly touched on a few of them. For more details, one good 

reference is Leedy & Ormrod’s Practical Research: Planning and Design. 

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The Mechanics of Research 

SUMMARY 

The most important concept to take away from this appendix is that research must consist of 

more than just gathering information and spewing it back out again in a slightly different format. 

Research begins with the formulation of an appropriate research question. The research question, 

the data, and your interests influence the research methodology. In shorter research papers you 

may not be required to specifically state the methodology you used. However, it should be 

apparent from reading your paper that you aren’t just presenting information, but are also 

drawing some new meaning from the information and actually contributing to the body of 

knowledge. 

The real fun in life comes from total creative absorption in a task and not the external rewards 

for doing it. 

– Michael Leboeuf

 

Notes 

1 Thomas S. Kuhn, The Structure of Scientific Revolutions (Chicago, IL: The University of Chicago Press, 1970), 38. 2

 J. J. Carr, The Art of Science: A Practical Guide to Experiments, Observations and Handling Data (San Diego, CA: HighText 

Publications, 1992), 85-87. 3

 Jacques Barzun and Henry F. Graff, The Modern Researcher (New York: Harcourt, Brace and World, 1985), 19. 4

 Paul D, Leedy and Jeanne Ellis Ormrod, Practical Research; Planning and Design (Upper Saddle River, NJ: Merrill Prentice 

Hall, 2001), 70. 

5

 Marcia Watkins, The Walden University Survival Guide (NY: Love From the Sea Publishers, 1997), 56. 6

 Marvin Bassett, ed., Air University Style Guide, (Maxwell AFB, AL: Air University Press, 2001), 11. 7

 Bassett, 27. 8

 Bassett, 72. 9

 Bassett, 131. 10 Goodfellow, Major Gerald V., “Citing an email.” E-mail to Marcia Watkins. 1 April 2003. 11 HCarolineH, HEricH, and HEmilyH, “How to Write a Clear Research Report,” on-line, Internet, 8 October 2002, available 

from http://www.radix.net/%7Efornax/air/clearrep.html. 12 HE. Robert SchulmanH, HC. Virginia CoxH, and HE. Anne SchulmanH, “How to Write a Scientific Research Report,” online, Internet, 8 October 2002, available from http://www.radix.net/%7Efornax/air/scireport.html. 13 Bassett, 86. 14 Leedy & Ormrod, 147. 15 Paul D. Leedy, Practical Research; Planning and Design (New York: MacMillan, 1989),125. 16 Leedy, 128. 17 Leedy, 133-134. 18 Leedy, 134. 19 Leedy & Ormrod, 149. 20 Leedy & Ormrod, 149. 21 Leedy & Ormrod, 151. 22 Leedy & Ormrod, 151. 23 Leedy & Ormrod, 153. 24 Leedy & Ormrod, 154. 25 Leedy & Ormrod, 155. 26 Leedy, 141. 27 Leedy & Ormrod, 230. 28 Leedy & Ormrod, 233. 

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Let's face it—English is a crazy language 

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in 

pineapple. 

Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. 

We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that 

quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is

neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce

and hammers don't ham? 

If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? 

One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? 

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? 

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, 

what do you call it? 

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? 

Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an 

asylum for the verbally insane. 

In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? 

Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? 

Have noses that run and feet that smell? 

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and 

a wise guy are opposites? 

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house

can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and 

in which an alarm goes off by going on. 

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the 

creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't a race at all). 

That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights 

are out, they are invisible. 

Enuff? Gud! 

 

– 354 –
APPENDIX 3 

EFFECTIVE READING 

STRATEGIES 

This appendix covers: 

• Barriers to effective reading. 

• Reading for study or research. 

• Memory aids. 

Why would we want to improve our reading skills? If we’re reading for pleasure, we may enjoy 

reading slowly and savoring every word. However, if we need to read or review lengthy 

materials in the course of our jobs, our time is valuable. Improving reading speed and 

comprehension will help pinpoint the information we need in the limited time we have available. 

On a day-to-day basis, we must stay current with world events and read or review Air Force 

Instructions, operating instructions, plans, technical orders, and promotion study guides. Since 

we don’t have time to spend our days reading, we have to learn to use our reading time more 

effectively. 

This appendix provides some basic strategies for improving reading skills. First, we’ll discuss 

some barriers to effective reading and techniques to overcome these barriers. Next, we outline a 

study and research a reading method to help you get the most from your time. Finally, we offer 

some memory improvement tips. 

“Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.”

 — Joseph Addison 

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WHAT ARE SOME BARRIERS TO EFFECTIVE READING? 

Some of us continue to use the habits we adopted when we first learned how to read. Most of us 

don’t even realize we’re still practicing them. These habits are keeping us from reading 

efficiently and effectively. 

c Reading at a fixed speed. One habit we tend to overlook is reading different types of 

material at the same speed. Not all materials are equally difficult to read. In the same way, not 

all sections of a particular written work are of equal complexity. 

To read efficiently, adjust your speed according to the difficulty of the text you’re reading and 

your purpose for reading it. If you’re reading for main ideas only, skim the material quickly. 

Shift speeds as needed for additional information. Slow down on the complex parts, and speed 

up on the easy ones. If you are somewhat familiar with the material, read faster. Read faster 

over broad overviews and unneeded details. Generally, you’ll need to slow down while reading 

detailed technical material and material with unfamiliar concepts. If you are reading for study 

purposes, your overall rate will be slower. 

d Vocalizing, or subvocalizing, words. Another common habit we typically don’t think 

about is vocalization, or subvocalization. This occurs when we say the words we’re reading 

aloud, or to ourselves. If we pronounce each word, we can’t read any faster than we can speak. 

To overcome this habit, learn to read faster than you can speak. One way to do this is to shift 

your focus from a small area of print to a larger one. We’ll cover a couple of techniques under 

the next section. 

Another way to help cut your dependence on saying the words is to think about the key words, 

ideas or images—picture what is happening. You have to go over the print fast enough to give 

your brain all the information quickly. Keep your mind clear so the picture or thought can enter 

it. Then, accept it without question. Try not to let other thoughts intrude. 

e Reading words one at a time. Reading individual words is very inefficient. To read faster, 

your eyes must move faster over the printed material. We can’t continue reading one word at a 

time. However, just willing your eyes to move faster isn’t enough. Many of us have been 

practicing this habit of slow eye movements for so long that it’s too hard to give it up that easily. 

One way to break this habit is to use your hand, or another object, as a pacing aid. Since your 

eyes tend to follow moving objects, your eye will follow your hand as it moves across the page. 

One method is to make one continuous movement with your hand across each line of text. For 

example: 

– 356 –
Effective Reading Strategies 

The first operations conducted by airmen

were designed to gain information

superiority. Subsequently, air-to-air

combat evolved as a means to deny

information superiority to an adversary.

Information operations from air and space

and, today, in cyberspace, remain key 

elements of what our Service brings to the

Nation, the joint force commander, and

component and coalition forces. 

AFDD 1, Air Force Basic Doctrine, 1 Sep 97

Use your hand 

as a pacing aid 

As your hand moves across the text, your eyes will follow it. You can change the speed as 

needed for the difficulty of the material you’re reading. 

Another method is to let your peripheral vision do some of the work. To use this technique, 

break up the page into groups of words, or columns. Instead of focusing your eyes on every 

word, begin by focusing on every second or third word. Practice moving your eyes smoothly 

from one group to the next, and let your peripheral vision pick up the words on each side of the 

break. For example, you could break up this sentence into groups of words like this: 

For example, you / could break up / this sentence into / groups of words / like this. 

To break the text up into columns, use the following pattern as an example for your eyes to 

follow. As you read each line of text, focus your eyes on the first dotted line. (This line 

represents the center of the first column of text.) Then jump to the second line and finally the 

third line. Let your peripheral vision pick up the words on either side of the line as you go along. 

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The Tongue and Quill 

Thunder torms contain the most sev e weather 

hazards to flight. Ma y are accompanied by

strong winds. severe i ing and turbulence, 

frequent lightning, vy rain, and hazardous

windshear. If all of these are not enough, -

consider the possibil of large hail, microbursts

and even tornadoes. hunderstorms are quite

powerful.

s er

n

c

hea

ity

 T

AFH 11-203, Vol 1, Weather for Aircrews, 1 Mar 97

Use your 

peripheral vision 

Practice is the key! You can increase your reading speed by spending a few minutes a day 

reading at a faster rate than normal. 

f Rereading passages. Another barrier to effective reading is rereading passages. This habit 

can slow your reading speed to a snail’s pace. We can all probably relate to this one. Once 

we’ve read a sentence or passage, we realize we have no idea what we’ve just read. Why? Our 

thoughts have a tendency to wander. 

To prevent reading passages over again, you need to increase your concentration. Try to isolate 

yourself from any outside distractions. Find a place away from phones, TVs and engaging 

conversations. 

A simple way to keep from rereading is to cover up the material you’ve already read with an 

index card. You can also use one of the pacing tools discussed under the last section. 

g Stumbling over unknown words or large numbers. Don’t let unfamiliar words or large 

numbers slow you down. 

Even readers who have a large vocabulary will come across unfamiliar words. You can usually 

gain the meaning of a word by its use in the text. Keep in mind that your ability to read faster 

depends upon your ability to recognize words quickly. The more you read, the more your 

vocabulary will grow. Additionally, improving your vocabulary will improve your 

comprehension. 

As for numbers, unless you need to remember specific data, just substitute “few” or “many” for 

the actual digits. 

– 358 –
Effective Reading Strategies 

WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO MY COMPREHENSION? 

When you first start practicing reading faster, you may understand very little of what you read. 

Be patient. Your eyes will get used to seeing the print at a rapid pace, and you’ll understand 

more. Begin by reading faster for only 5-10 minutes at one time, and gradually increase your 

time. In the end, your comprehension and retention should be at least as good as it is now. 

Research shows a proportional relationship between reading speed and comprehension. In most 

cases, an increase in comprehension follows an increase in reading speed. Comprehension 

decreases when speed decreases. Reading slowly, word-by-word, seems to inhibit 

understanding. (Virginia Tech and the University of Maryland.) Eliminating the barriers to 

effective reading can help. 

Practice is the key! 

HOW SHOULD I APPROACH READING FOR STUDY AND RESEARCH PURPOSES? 

SQR3 is one research reading method you can use. It stands for survey, question, read, recall, 

and review. F.P. Robinson coined the SQR3 acronym in a book entitled Effective Study (1946). 

University researchers continue to recommend this method to help you get the most from your 

reading time. It will help you separate the important information from the chaff. 

c Survey. The first step is to survey the material to get the big picture. This quick preview 

allows you to focus your attention on the main ideas and identify the sections you want to read in 

detail. The purpose is to determine which portions of the text are most applicable to your task. 

Read the table of contents, any introductions, section headings, 

subheading, summaries and the bibliography. Skim the text inbetween. Be sure to look at any figures, diagrams, charts, and 

highlighted areas. 

Skim for gist 

d Question. Once you’ve gained a feel for the substance of the material, compose questions 

about the subject you want answered. First, ask yourself what you already know about the topic. 

Next, compose your questions. You can also turn section headings and subheadings into 

questions. For example: 

– 359 –
The Tongue and Quill 

• “How do I create or change a program element?” 

• “What is the technical order change process? 

For some materials, you’ll want to use your critical thinking skills to interrogate the writer. The 

more you know about the author and his/her organization, the better you’ll be able to evaluate 

what you read. Try to answer questions like these: 

• What is the author’s experience and credentials? 

• What is the author’s target audience? 

• What is the author’s purpose?

• What are the author’s assumptions? 

• What are the author’s arguments?

• What evidence does the author use to support his/her arguments?

• What are the author’s conclusions? 

• What factors shaped the author’s perspective? 

e Read. Now go back and read those sections you identified during 

your survey. Search for answers to your questions. Look for the ideas 

behind the words. 

Read for details

f Recall. To help you retain the material, make a point to summarize the information you’ve 

read at appropriate intervals (end of paragraphs, sections, and chapters.) Your goal is not to 

remember everything you’ve read, just the important points. Recite these points silently or 

aloud. This will help improve your concentration. You can also jot down any important or 

useful points. Finally, determine what information you still need to obtain. 

g Review. This last step involves reviewing the information you’ve 

read. Skim a section or chapter immediately after you finish reading 

it. You can do this by skimming back over the material and by looking 

at any notes you made. Go back over all the questions you posed and 

see if you can answer them. 

Review for 

understanding 

– 360 –
Effective Reading Strategies 

HOW CAN I REMEMBER MORE OF WHAT I READ? 

If you need to improve your ability to remember information you’ve read, the following tips may 

help. 

c Improve your concentration. Improving your reading environment can help. Minimize 

distractions. Choose a place away from visual and auditory distractions. Ensure your chair, 

desk, and lighting are favorable for reading. Establish a realistic goal for how much you intend 

to read in one sitting. Stop occasionally for short breaks. 

d Organize the information. Arrange data or ideas in small groups that make sense to you. 

These groups will be easier to remember by association with the group. 

e Make the information relevant. Connect the new information with information you 

already know. Try to associate what you are reading with your job or your interests. Recalling 

the information you already know about a subject will make it easier to recall the new stuff. 

f Learn Actively. Researchers report “people remember 90 percent of what they do, 75 

percent of what they see, and 20 percent of what they hear.” (Dave Ellis, Becoming A Master 

Student, 8th ed., 1997.) Use all of your senses. Don’t just speak aloud when recalling 

information you’ve read, get your entire body into the act. Get up and move around, as if you 

are practicing for a speech. Use visualization and picture the information you’re reading. Write 

down the main points. These methods will help you to retain the material. Don’t forget to relax. 

When we’re relaxed, we think more clearly. 

g Use your long-term memory. Your short-term memory space is limited, so take advantage 

of your unlimited long-term memory. To commit information to your long-term memory, 

review the material several times. Change the order of the information you recite during your 

reviews. This takes advantage of your ability to remember best what you read last. 

h Maintain a positive attitude. If you think the information is going to help you in your job 

or personal life, it will be easier to remember. However, if you believe the information you’re 

reading is too difficult to retain, it will be. Think positive! 

i Use Mnemonics. You probably remember this memory aid from your childhood. 

Remember “My Very Energetic Mother Just Served Us Nine Pizzas?” This catch phrase helped 

us remember the order of the planets: Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, 

Neptune, and Pluto. You probably also know this catch phrase to help remember General 

Officer rank order: “Be My Little General” (Brigadier General, Major General, Lieutenant 

General, and General.) You could use a catchword to remember the Principles of War. 

“MOSSMOUSE” = Maneuver, Objective, Security, Simplicity, Mass, Offensive, Unity of 

command, Surprise and Economy of force. 

 

“I divide all readers into two classes: Those who read to remember and those

who read to forget.” 

 — William Phelps

– 361 –
The Tongue and Quill 

SUMMARY 

Improving effective reading skills means learning to break old reading habits that slow us down. 

The following tips will help. Be patient: Practice is the key! 

• Adjust your reading speed to match the difficulty of the material. 

• Learn to read faster than you can speak. 

• Use pacing aids to help you read faster. 

• Put your peripheral vision to work. 

• Increase your concentration by removing distractions. 

• Infer the meaning of unfamiliar words by their use in the text. 

• Improve your vocabulary. 

• Substitute “few” or “many” for numbers you don’t need to remember. 

Improving our study and research skills will help us make the most of our time. The following 

steps will help. 

• Survey the material. 

• Form questions you want to answer. 

• Read relevant sections to obtain details and answer your questions. 

• Recall information as you finish reading sections. 

• Review the material. 

Improving our ability to remember information will help us in all areas. The following tips may 

help. 

• Plan your environment to optimize your ability to concentrate. 

• Organize the information in small groups. 

• Make the information relevant to you. 

• Learn actively; use all of your senses. 

• Review the information several times, changing your review patterns. 

• Think positive. 

• Use mnemonic catchwords or catch phrases. 

 

 

 

“An ounce of practice is worth more than tons of preaching.” 

 — Mohandas Gandhi 

– 362 –
Effective Reading Strategies 

SOURCES 

AFDD 1, Air Force Basic Doctrine, 1 September 1997. 

AFH 11-203, Volume 1, Weather for Aircrews, 1 March 1997. 

Ellis, Dave B., Becoming a Master Student, 8th ed., Houghton Mifflin Co., 1997. 

Fowler, H. Ramsey, The Little, Brown Handbook, 2d ed., 1983. 

Robinson, F. P., Effective Study, New York: Harper & Row, 1946. 

Strategies for Improving Concentration and Memory, the Cook Counseling Center at Virginia 

Tech. 

Suggestions for Improving Reading Speed, the Cook Counseling Center at Virginia Tech, RSSL 

at the University of Maryland. 

USAFA Reading Program. 

Wenick, Lillian P., Speed Reading Naturally, 2d ed., Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentiss Hall, 1990.

– 363 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Some Actual Signs 

In the front yard of a funeral home: 

DRIVE CAREFULLY, WE’LL WAIT 

On an electrician’s truck:

LET US REMOVE YOUR SHORTS 

Outside a radiator repair shop: 

BEST PLACE IN TOWN TO TAKE A LEAK 

In a nonsmoking area: 

IF WE SEE YOU SMOKING, WE WILL ASSUME YOU ARE ON FIRE AND TAKE

APPROPRIATE ACTION 

On a maternity room door: 

PUSH, PUSH, PUSH 

On a front door: 

EVERYONE ON THE PREMISES IS A VEGETARIAN EXCEPT THE DOG 

At an optometrist’s office: 

IF YOU DON’T SEE WHAT YOU’RE LOOKING FOR, YOU’VE COME TO THE RIGHT 

PLACE 

On a taxidermist’s window: 

WE REALLY KNOW OUR STUFF 

On a butcher’s window: 

LET ME MEAT YOUR NEEDS 

On a fence: 

SALESMEN WELCOME. DOG FOOD IS EXPENSIVE

At a car dealership: 

THE BEST WAY TO GET BACK ON YOUR FEET—MISS A CAR PAYMENT 

Outside a muffler shop: 

NO APPOINTMENT NECESSARY. WE’LL HEAR YOU COMING 

In a dry cleaner’s emporium: 

DROP YOUR PANTS HERE 

On a desk in a reception room: 

WE SHOOT EVERY 3RD SALESMAN, AND THE 2ND ONE JUST LEFT 

In a veterinarian’s waiting room: 

BE BACK IN 5 MINUTES. SIT! STAY! 

At the electric company: 

WE WOULD BE DELIGHTED IF YOU SEND IN YOUR BILL. HOWEVER, IF YOU DON’T, 

YOU WILL BE

– 364 –
APPENDIX 4 

BIBLIOGRAPHY 

AND OTHER 

REFERENCES 

Barzun, Jacques and Henry F. Graff. The Modern Researcher. New York: Harcourt, Brace and 

World, 1985. 

Bassett, Marvin, ed. Air University Style Guide For Writers and Editors, Maxwell AFB, AL: Air 

Booth, Wayne C, Gregory C. Colomb, and Joseph M. Williams, The Craft of Research, Chicago, 

IL: University of Chicago Press, 1995. 

Bronowski, J. The Common Sense of Science. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 1953. 

Carr, J. J. The Art of Science: A Practical Guide to Experiments, Observations and Handling 

Data. San Diego, CA: HighText Publications, 1992. 

Covey, Stephen R. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. New York: Simon and Schuster, 

1989. 

Cox, Caroline, Eric Schulman, and Emily Schulman, “How to Write a Clear Research Report,” 

n.p. On-line. Internet, 8 October 2002. Available from

http://members.verizon.net/~vze3fs8i/air/scireport.html

Doyle, Michael and David Straus, How to Make Meetings Work. New York: Berkley, 1976. 

Kuhn, Thomas S. The Structure of Scientific Revolutions. Chicago, IL: The University of 

Chicago Press, 1970. 

Leedy, Paul D. Practical Research. New York: MacMillan, 1989. 

Paul, Richard and Linda Elder, The Miniature Guide to Critical Thinking. Dillon Beach, CA, 

The Foundation for Critical Thinking, 1999. 

Ramage, John D., John C. Bean and June Johnson, Writing Arguments (concise edition). New 

York: Longman, 2001. 

– 365 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Schulman, E. Robert, C. Virginia Cox, and E. Anne Schulman, “How to Write a Scientific 

Research Report,” np. On-line. Internet, 8 October 2002. 

http://members.verizon.net/~vze3fs8i/air/scireport.html 

Smith, Perry M., Rules and Tools for Leaders; A Down to Earth Guide for Effective Managing. 

New York: Avery, 1998. 

The Tongue and Quill (AFH 33-337). Maxwell AFB AL: Air Command and Staff College, 30 

June 1997. 

Watkins, Marcia The Walden University Survival Guide. Love From the Sea, 1997. 

Wilkerson, D. & Kellogg, J. Survey Assessment: A Practical Approach to Supporting Change. 

Arlington, VA: Coopers and Lybrand, 1994. 

– 366 –
1 THE 

2 INDEX .b. Abbreviation 

academic degree, 313 

acronym, 310 

Air Force rank, 312 

brevity code, 310 

computer, 152-154 

contraction, 310 

day, 312 

direct reporting unit, 314 

field operating agency, 313 

in general, 311 

Latin, 314 

major command, 314 

month, 312 

phonetic alphabet, 313 

researcher’s guide, 315 

slash, 311 

state, 312 

units of measure, 314 

year, 312 

ZIP code, 312 

Academic degree, 313 

Accomplishment-impact, 213, 226 

Acronym, 310 

Action verb, 213 

Active voice, 73, 266 

Address/salutation/close, 170-182 

Adjective, 266 

Adverb, 229, 266 

Analyze 

audience, 8, 21, 24 

purpose, 19, 20 

Answering machine, 150 

Antecedent, 99, 266 

Apostrophe, 276-277 

Appositive, 266 

Arguments (see Logical Arguments) 

Article, 266 

Asterisk, 278 

Attachment, 219, 206 

Audience analysis, 8, 21-24 

Awards/decorations, 237-239 

citation, 239 

.c.!

Background paper, 215-216 

Barrier, 356-357 

Bibliography, 345-347, 365-366 

Big words, 79-87 

Biography, 243-245 

Body, Drafting the, 68 

Boolean operators, 29 

Bottom line (see Purpose statement) 

Bracket, 279 

Brevity code, 310 

Briefing, 122-125 

Bullet background paper, 211-213 

Bullet statement, 213, 226-235 

Bulletin board, 70

Buzzwords, 240 

.d.!

Capitalization

academic degree, 326 

act/amendment/bill, 323 

agency, 326 

army/navy/air force/marine, 

 321-322 

artistic work, 320-321 

award, 324 

celestial body, 327 

college/university, 326 

colon, 318-319 

commercial product, 328 

committee, 326 

common noun, 320 

compass direction, 327 

concept, 323 

course title/subject, 326 

day, 328 

department/directorate, 321-322 

do not, 319 

document, 321-322 

employee, 321-322 

event, 328 

exercise, 320 

first word, 318-319 

government body, 321-322 

heading, 320-321 

holiday, 328, 329 

hyphenated compound, 320-321 

judicial, 322 

language, 328 

law, 323 

literary title, 320-321 

medal, 324 

military rank, 324 

month, 328 

national/international, 321-322 

noun, 327 

operation, 320 

organization, 326 

peoples/race, 328 

period, 328 

political, 323 

program/movement, 323 

proper noun, 320 

publication, 323 

race/people, 328 

religion, 328-329 

season, 328 

state/local government, 322-323 

title, 324-326 

treaty/war, 323 

week, 328 

with letter/number, 327 

Case 

nominative, 266 

objective, 266 

possessive, 266 

Cause and effect, 50 

Checklist 

award, 238 

citation, 239 

coordinator’s, 112 

cover memo, 252 

drafting evaluation, 65-89 

overcoming palms sweaty, 119 

Civilian awards, 237 

decorations, 237 

Clarity, 7

Clause, 266 

Clichés, 77 

– 367 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Citations, 239 

Closed punctuation, 274-275 

Closing (correspondence), 170-182 

Color (see Slides) 

Communication 

audience 8, 21-24 

boss/general officer, 166 

coordination of, 110-112 

defined, 4 

effective principles, 6 

focus principles, 6-8 

main idea (see Purpose 

 statement) 

nonverbal (see Speaking) 

purpose of, 4, 10, 19, 20 

seven steps, 9-13 

and teamwork, 5 

three parts, 4 

tone, 23 

verbal (see Speaking) 

Compound subject, 99-101 

Compound word, 294-296 

Computer 

coordination, 112 

do’s/don’ts, 147-149 

electronic glossary, 152-154 

layout, 126-129 

Conclusion, 67-68 

Conjunction, 266 

Contraction, 310 

Consonants, 266 

Coordination (also see Staff 

 Summary Sheet) 

audience, 108-109 

checklist, 112 

e-mail, 110 

feedback, 108-112 

nonconcurrence, 110 

routing options, 109 

shotgun, 109 

Copyright, 343-344 

Credibility, 52 

Customer response form, 375 

.e.!

Dash, 287-288 

Day, 312, 328 

Decision briefing, 125 

Direct reporting unit, 314 

Display dot, 289-290 

accomplishment-impact, 213, 

 226-235 

single idea, 213 

Drafting, 65-68 

conclusion, 66-67 

introduction, 66 

paragraphs in the body, 68-69 

purpose statement, 20, 56, 66 

three-part structure, 66 

.f. 

Editing

arrangement/flow, 95-96 

common grammar errors, 97-101 

for purpose/big picture, 93 

fresh-eyes approach, 94 

general advice, 92-93 

layout, 126-129 

paragraph structure, 94 

proofreader marks, 102 

sentences and words, 95-96 

E-mail, 144-149 

authorized, 144 

Ellipsis, 291 

Endnote, 344 

Envelope 

addressing, 260 

definitions, 262 

holey joe, 261 

parcels, 261 

pouch mail, 261 

Exclamation mark, 292 

External transitions, 72 

Extemporaneous speaking, 122 

.g.!

Fax, 151 

Feedback 

how to ask for help, 106-107 

how to give, 107 

general philosophy, 106-108 

necessity for, 106 

Field operating agency, 313 

Focus principles of 

communication, 6-8 

Focused communication, 6 

Fonts, 127, 147 

Footnote, 344 

Formal/informal, 24

.h. 

Gerund, 269 

Graphics, 128 

Grammar errors, 96-101 

Grammar definitions, 265-271 

.i. 

Heading, 73, 347 

Hyphen, 293-297 

.j. 

Impromptu speaking, 122 

In turn memo, 187-188 

Indorsement memo, 189-191 

Infinitive, 270 

Informative briefing, 125 

Interjection, 266 

Internal transitions, 71

Internet 

as a source of info, 27 

evaluating sources, 30-31 

searches, 28-30 

Introduction, 66-67 

Italics, 298 

.k. 

Jargon, 23, 76 

.m. 

Language (see Tone) 

Letter (see Memo) 

Listening 

critical listening, 136 

defined, 132 

empathic listening, 137-138 

importance of, 132 

informative listening, 135 

motivation, 133, 139, 140 

Logical Arguments, 41-53 

claim/thesis, 42 

elements, 42 

ethics, 52 

evidence, 44-47 

warrants, 43 

Logical fallacies, 47-52 

.n. 

Major command, 314 

Manuscript briefing, 122-124 

Mechanics of writing, 263-336 

Memo

in turn, 187-188 

indorsement, 189-191 

memo for record, 195-196 

official, 183-185 

personal, 167-169 

résumé cover, 253 

short-note, 193-194 

staff study, 199-207 

trip report, 197-198 

Memorandum for record, 195-196 

Meetings, 155-164 

forming, 162 

norming, 162 

performing, 162 

storming, 162 

Military decoration, 237 

Missing briefing, 125 

Modal auxiliary, 267 

Modals, 268 

– 368 –
The Index 

Modified verb, 213 

Modifier 

ambiguous, 97, 267 

dangling, 97, 267 

definition, 97 

misplaced, 97 

Month, 312, 328 

.o. 

Nonconcurrence, 230 

Nonverbal communication 

stage fright, 119 

visual aid, 126-130 

Noun 

abstract, 268 

capitalization, 327 

collective, 268 

common, 320 

concrete, 268 

proper, 320 

Number (see Grammar 

definition) 

Number 

abbreviation, 332 

age, 332 

clock, 332 

compound modifier, 335 

date, 332 

dimension/size/temperature, 

333 

document ID, 333 

executive correspondence, 

331 

figure style, 332 

formal, 275, 334 

fraction, 335 

hyphenation, 333 

in general, 331 

latitude/longitude, 333 

literary, 331 

mathematical expression, 

333 

measurement, 332 

military unit designator, 

334 

million, 335 

money, 332 

nontechnical, 331 

percentage, 333 

plural, 335 

proportion, 333 

ratio, 333 

referred to as number, 333 

Roman numeral, 336 

rounded/indefinite, 335 

scientific/statistical, 331 

score, 333 

serial, 333 

spelling out, 334-335 

symbol, 333 

time, 332 

unit modifier, 333 

voting results, 333 

with noun, 327 

word style, 334-335 

.p. 

Object, 269 

Official memorandum, 183-185 

Organize and Outline 

bottom line first, 56

cause and effect, 62 

classical, 58 

chronological, 59-60 

formats, 57 

logic, 61 

numerical, 58 

organizational patterns, 59-

62 

outline, 58, 59, 61

pattern, 59-62 

problem-solution, 61 

reason, 61 

spatial/geographic, 60 

outline formats, 57-58

topical, 59 

Organized communication, 7 

.q. 

Papers 

background, 215-216 

bullet background, 211-212 

point, 210 

position, 217-218 

staff summary sheet, 219-

223 

talking, 209-210 

Paragraphs 

arrangement/flow, 68-69 

dividing, 68-69, 297 

length, 68-69 

main point, 68 

topic sentence, 69 

transitional, 72-73 

Parallel construction, 75 

Paraphrase, 343 

Parentheses, 299-300 

Parenthetical expressions, 100 

Participle, 270 

Parts of speech, 269 

Passive voice, 73-74, 269 

Pattern

cause and effect, 62 

outline, 58, 59, 61

problem-solution, 61 

reason, 61 

spatial/geographical, 60 

chronological, 59-60 

topical, 59 

Performance report, 225-235 

Period, 301-302 

Person, 269 

Personal letter, 167-169 

Phone (see Telephone) 

Phonetic alphabet, 313 

Phrase 

between subject/verb, 98 

buzzword, 240 

definition, 269 

simpler word/phrase, 81-87 

transitional, 72-73 

Pictures, 126 

Plagiarism, 269, 342 

Plural (letter of alphabet), 

Point paper, 210 

Position paper, 217-218 

Possessive, 266 

Predicate, 269 

Prefix, 295-296 

Preposition, 269 

Problem-solution 

description, 61 

limit, 200 

pro and con, 61 

solution, 61 

staff study report, 199-207 

Proofreader marks, 102 

Pronoun, 99, 269 

pronoun antecedent 

agreement, 99 

Publications (AF) 

action officer role, 241 

contraction, 310 

editing, 242 

numbering, 302 

style, 242 

title, 242 

writing, 242 

Punctuation 

apostrophe, 276-277 

asterisk, 278 

brackets, 279 

closed, 274-275 

colon, 280-281 

comma, 100, 282-286 

dash, 287-288 

display dot, 289-290 

ellipsis, 291 

exclamation mark, 292 

guidelines, 273-307 

hyphen, 293-297 

italics, 298 

open, 274-275 

parenthesis, 299-300 

period, 301-302 

question mark, 303-304 

quotation marks, 305-306 

– 369 –
The Tongue and Quill 

semicolon, 307 

Purpose, 157 

of communication, 19 

persuasion, 42 

Purpose statements, 20, 56, 66 

.r. 

Question mark, 303-304 

Quotation mark, 305-306 

.s. 

Rank, 23, 312 

Reading 

barriers, 356-357 

strategies, 356-361 

study and research, 359 

Religious language, 328-329 

Research 

citations, 341 

copyrights, 343 

how to cite sources, 344 

qualitative methods, 350 

quantitative methods, 350-

353 

quotations, 342 

methodology, 348 

qualitative, 348 

planning, 338-340 

paraphrase, 343 

Research paper 

abbreviations, 315 

bibliography, 347-348 

copyright, 344 

endnote, 345-346 

footnote, 345 

paraphrase, 343-344 

quotation, 342-343 

textnote, 346 

Researching your topic, 25-40 

evaluating sources, 30-31 

internet searches, 28-30 

libraries, 28 

list of internet sites, 33-40

office files, 27 

planning research, 26 

sources of information, 27-

28 

Résumé

action verbs, 228 

chronological, 248, 254 

combination, 248, 256 

content, 251 

cover memo, 253 

federal government, 248, 

258 

functional, 248, 255 

include/not include, 251 

length, 251 

military, 249 

targeted, 248, 257 

Roman numeral, 336 

.t. 

Salutations (memo), 170-182 

Semicolon, 307 

Sentence 

active/passive verb, 74 

complex, 269 

compound, 269 

jargon, 23, 76 

length, 88 

parallelism, 75

part of speech, 269 

passive, 73-74 

questions, 88 

short, 88 

tone, 23-24 

transitional, 72-73 

word choice (see words) 

wordy words, 79-87 

Setting (for meeting), 

Seven steps to effective 

communication, 9-13 

Short-note reply, 193-194 

Simpler word/phrase, 81-87 

Single idea, 213 

Slash, 311 

Slides 

do’s/don’ts, 129 

color, 126-127 

graphics, 128 

headings, 347 

preparing, 126-129 

text, 127 

Solution, 201-202 

Smothered verbs, 75 

Source (see Research) 

Air Force, 33 

DOD, 35 

internet sites, 27, 28, 33-40 

magazine/indexes, 36-38 

military bibliographies, 36

military newspaper, 36

other indexes, 38-40 

other services, 34 

primary, secondary, tertiary, 

32 

Spacing 

asterisk, 278 

brackets, 279 

colon, 281 

comma, 286 

dash, 288 

display dot, 290 

ellipsis, 291 

exclamation mark, 292 

hyphen, 297 

parenthesis, 300 

period, 302 

question mark, 304 

quotation marks, 306 

semicolon, 307 

Spatial/geographical, 60 

Speaking 

extemporaneous, 122 

impromptu, 122 

manuscript, 122-124 

prepared, 122 

nonverbal, 118-121 

sweaty palms syndrome, 119 

verbal, 116-118 

Staff briefing, 125 

Staff study report, 199-207 

Staff summary sheet, 219-223 

attachment, 221 

electronic staff, 222-223 

Stage fright, 119 

Stage setting remarks, 66 

States, 312 

Subject, 269 

Subject-verb agreement, 98 

Support, 8 

.u. 

Tabs, 206, 221 

Talking paper, 209-210 

Telephone 

answering machine, 150 

protocol, 150-151 

voice mail, 150 

Tense, 269 

Textnote, 345 

Titles, 242, 324-325 

Tone 

formal/informal, 24

inclusive, 23 

personal, 23 

persuasive, 

polite, 23

positive, 23-24

Topical, 59 

Transitions, 71-73 

external, 72 

headings, 73 

internal, 71 

Trip report, 197-198 

.v. 

.w. 

Verb 

action, 213 

active/passive, 73 

auxiliary/helping verb, 270 

intransitive, 270 

irregular, 270 

linking, 270 

– 370 –
The Index 

modified, 213 

number, 98 

principal, 270 

single, 98 

smothered, 75 

subject-verb agreement, 98-

99 

transitive, 270 

Verbal 

gerund, 269 

infinitive, 270 

participle, 270 

Verbal communication 

articulation/pronunciation, 

117 

length, 117-118 

pause, pitch, 117 

rate, 116 

volume, 116 

Visual aid, 126-129 

Voice mail, 150 

Vowel, 271 

.x. 

Web page, 31, 154 

Web site, 33-40, 154 

Word division, 295, 297 

Words

abbreviations, 309-311 

action verbs, 213 

active verbs, 73, 266 

big, 79-87 

bulletin board, 70 

buzz, 240 

choice, 73-88, 269 

clauses, 266 

clichés, 77 

concrete, 76 

contraction, 266, 310 

courtesy, 23 

doubleheaders, 80 

dividing, 297 

doubling, 80 

easily confused, 78 

formal/informal, 24

inclusive, 23 

jargon, 76 

meaning, 76 

misplaced modifier, 97 

redundancy, 80 

religious, 328-329 

shades of meaning, 76 

simpler, 81-87 

tone, 23-24 

unnecessary, 79-87 

verbs, 73, 75, 98-99, 213, 

270 

Wordsmithing marks, 103 

World Wide Web, 154 

Writing

Air Force publications (see 

Publications) 

citation, 341 

clause, 266 

for a boss/general, 166 

formatting, 347 

letter/memo, 167-196 

mechanics of, 263-336 

parts of speech, 269 

recommending punctuation, 

273 

reports, 203-206 

rules, 224, 236 

style, 347 

tone, 23 

words, 76-87 

Writer’s block, 89 

.z.

Yellow sticky, 151 

.{. 

ZIP code, 312

– 371 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Some Actual Signs continue 

In a Beauty Shop: 

DYE NOW! 

On the side of a garbage truck: 

WE’VE GOT WHAT IT TAKES TO TAKE WHAT YOU’VE GOT. (BURGLARS PLEASE COPY.) 

In a restaurant window: 

DON’T STAND THERE AND BE HUNGRY, COME IN AND GET FED UP 

Inside a bowling alley: 

PLEASE BE QUIET. WE NEED TO HEAR A PIN DROP 

In a cafeteria: 

SHOES ARE REQUIRED TO EAT IN THE CAFETERIA. SOCKS CAN EAT ANY PLACE THEY 

WANT 

Sign in a Laundromat: 

AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT 

GOES OUT 

Sign in a London department store: 

BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS 

In an office: 

WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK 

OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN 

In an office: 

AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE 

DRAINING BOARD 

Outside a secondhand shop: 

WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING—BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR 

WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN? 

Notice in health food shop window: 

CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS 

Spotted in a safari park: 

ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR 

Seen during a conference: 

FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 

FIRST FLOOR 

Notice in a field: 

THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL 

CHARGES 

Message on a leaflet: 

IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS 

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– 374 –
CUSTOMER RESPONSE FOR THE TONGUE AND QUILL

Please copy and mail or fax your response to: 

ACSC/DEOP, 225 Chennault Circle, Maxwell AFB AL 36112-6426 

Fax: DSN 493-2526 Commercial: (334) 953-2526

Rank/Grade: Job Title: Major Command: 

Use this scale to answer questions 1, 2 and 3: 

E = Excellent G = Good F = Fair P = Poor 

1. Clarity: { } 2. Detail: { } 3. Examples: { } 

4. How often do you use The Tongue and Quill? { 1 2 3 4 5 } 

 never frequently 

5. What section is most useful to you? Why?

6. What section is least useful to you? Why?

7. What topics or areas would you like to add? Why?

8. What topics or areas would you like to delete? Why?

9. General Comments: 

We value your opinion—please share it with us. 

 

 

– 375 –
The Tongue and Quill 

Now the steps have finally been done. 

Except the seventh and last—the feedback one. 

After your inspection is finally complete, 

fax or mail me your feedback sheet! 

(See pages 105-112 and 375) 

DONALD J. WETEKAM, Lt Gen, USAF 

DCS/Installations and Logistics

– 376 –
I know that 

you believe you 

understand what 

you think I said, 

but, 

I am not sure 

you realize that 

what you heard 

is not 

what I meant!