Protocol for the Modern Diplomat 

Prepared by the Transition Center 

Foreign Service Institute 

U.S. Department of State 

Washington, DC 

2005 
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ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS 

The Transition Center staff wishes to thank the interns, former staff members, and the 

members of many overseas posts who contributed their time, experiences, and information to 

this effort. 
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Introduction............................................................................................................... 

I. International Culture............................................................................................ 

Addressing Others 

Introductions 

Titles 

II. U.S. Mission Culture............................................................................................ 

Before Arrival 

Arriving at Post 

Welcoming 

Making Calls 

Calling Cards 

Responsibilities at Post 

Hierarchy 

III. Host Country Culture ...................................................................................... 

Social Red Flags 

Being a Guest 

Resources 

IV. Entertaining ...................................................................................................... 

Whom to Invite 

Informal Entertaining 

Formal Entertaining 

V. Dress .......................................................................................................... 

Formal “Black Tie” or “White Tie” 

Semi-formal/Informal 

Casual 

Medals and Decorations 

Summary.................................................................................................................. 

Bibliography ............................................................................................................ 

Glossary of Diplomatic Terms ............................................................................... 
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INTRODUCTION 

Few things are as anxiety provoking for the first-time embassy or mission employee or 

family member as the notion of diplomatic protocol. Protocol can sound both stuffy and 

mysterious at the same time; and most of us believe we have had little experience in our nongovernment lives to prepare us. In fact, the rules and processes of diplomatic protocol are 

based in pragmatic thinking, common sense, and good manners—areas where we all have 

had some experience. 

Protocol makes the job of representing our nation easier by facilitating our work as a mission 

team, making our relationships and interactions within the diplomatic and host country 

communities more predictable, and by providing a basic social framework and hierarchy to 

follow. 

We've designed this booklet to help you begin to master the basics of diplomatic protocol. 

Whether you are an employee or spouse, have few representational responsibilities or are 

running your post’s protocol office, this booklet is a good starting point for you. The 

booklet's four main sections deal with international culture, U.S. mission culture, the hostcountry culture, and entertaining. A bibliography and diplomatic glossary are included at the 

end of the text. 

Our sincere hope is that you take the time to read through Protocol for the Modern Diplomat, 

and make a point of adopting and practicing this art and craft during your overseas 

assignment. We believe doing so will make you more personally effective overseas, and 

thereby make our missions more effective. 

Ray S. Leki 

Director 

Transition Center 

January 2005 
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I. INTERNATIONAL CULTURE 

At gatherings that include representatives from the host country as well as from other 

countries, the timeless formality of international diplomatic culture remains in place. It 

ensures that each country will be respected uniformly and without bias. The necessary 

respect is expressed most visibly through spoken courtesies. Below are some tips on how to 

address and introduce diplomatic representatives. 

Addressing Others 

Although guidelines exist, proper forms of address vary greatly from culture to culture. Be 

sure to check local customs, but a few general rules follow. 

The spirit of formality among diplomatic representatives usually means not addressing others 

by their first names as quickly as is done in the United States. One should rely on courtesy 

titles until invited to do otherwise. Socially, one can refer to a spouse by his/her first name or 

as "my husband," or "my wife" rather than as "Mr./Mrs. Smith." When dealing with 

household employees however, you should still refer to your spouse as "Mr./Mrs. Smith." 

Ambassadors are addressed as Mr./Madam Ambassador or Ambassador Jones. Only by 

special invitation or long friendship should one address an ambassador by first name and then 

only when not in the public eye. In indirect address, refer to the ambassador as "the 

ambassador", with his/her spouse as "the ambassador and Mr./Mrs. Jones," or if the 

ambassador's spouse is a woman who kept her maiden name after marriage, "the ambassador 

and his wife, Ms. Smith." An ambassador of the United States may continue to be addressed 

as "Mr./Madam Ambassador" after retirement or after returning from his/her duties abroad. 

In some French-speaking countries, the wife of the ambassador may be referred to as Madam 

Ambassador. Therefore, in those countries, refer to a female ambassador by her last name 

(Ambassador Jones) to avoid confusion and ensure that she receives her due respect. 

Those of rank below Ambassador are addressed as Mr., Ms. or Mrs., if marital status is 

known. 

When referring to a U.S. post, "the Embassy of the United States of America" is preferred 

over "the American Embassy." As references to America can be ambiguous, especially in the 

Western Hemisphere, avoid using terms such as "American ambassador" or "American 

citizen." Similarly, to be clear and to avoid offending others by suggesting that the US 

constitutes the entire continent, use "United States" in all references to this country. 
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Introductions 

The purpose of making introductions is to exchange names between people so that a 

conversation can follow. For a formal occasion, the traditional "Mrs. Smith, may I present 

Mr. Jones?" is used internationally. For less formal occasions simply stating the two names, 

"Mrs. Smith, Mr. Jones," is acceptable. Making personal introductions (i.e., introducing 

oneself) is perfectly acceptable and encouraged. Adding context about yourself and your role 

is helpful. For example, "Hello, I'm Jane Smith, Vice Consul at the United States Embassy." 

In English, the accepted, formal response to any introduction is, "How do you do?" 

Informally, a smile, "Hello," or, "It's nice to meet you," are fine. Other languages have very 

particular phrases, so be sure to learn them upon arriving at post. 

When making introductions, honor is recognized by the name spoken first. Courtesy gives 

honor to those who are older, higher in rank, titled, have a professional status, or are female. 

To make the introductions more pleasant, tell each individual a bit of information about the 

other. This encourages the conversation to continue. 

As they do when a woman enters the room, men should rise when being introduced to a 

woman. In some countries, a man kisses a married woman's hand. Men also rise when being 

introduced to another man. Women should rise when being introduced to another woman for 

whom she wishes to show great respect, such as the hostess, a very distinguished woman, or 

much older woman. In some countries, women rise when introduced to all others. 

Throughout the world, greeting and leave-taking customs may include handshakes, salutatory 

gestures or other specific expressions. If there is such a tradition, use it with host country 

nationals, foreigners and fellow staff members. Failure to abide with tradition may be 

interpreted as rudeness or a lack of respect for colleagues. 

The best and most courteous way to handle recognizing someone without recalling his or her 

name is to mention your name again. For example, "Good evening, I'm Jim Smith. We met 

recently at the ambassador's home. I'm pleased to see you again." More than likely, he/she 

will reintroduce himself/herself. Starting from the assumption that he/she may also not 

remember your name could save both of you potential embarrassment. 

Titles 

Forms of address for foreign government official s and people holding professional, 

ecclesiastical, or traditional titles vary among countries. The correct local usage can be 

verified at post. Following are titles for U.S. and some foreign officials that are widely used 

in both spoken and written address. It is appropriate to begin letters and refer to others 

directly and indirectly with the following titles. 
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Diplomatic Titles 

Chiefs of Mission

• Mr./Madam Ambassador (this also applies to an ambassador with a military title), or 

Ambassador Reed.* 

• Sir Richard—British ambassador who is a knight (Sir Richard's wife would be 

addressed as "Lady Smith.") 

• Lord Montgomery—British ambassador who is a baron 

• Mr./Mrs. Douglas or Ms. Williams—the ambassador's spouse 

Chargé d'Affaires

• Mr./Ms/Mrs./Madam Randal 

Ministers and Others

• Mr./Madam Taylor 

* Special note should be made of how to address ambassadors. Over the years, and recently 

as well, there has been discussion about the use of the honorific title of Ambassador by 

former ambassadors, both those who remain active in the Foreign Service and those who are 

retired. For years, Department regulations have forbidden this usage unless actually in the job 

of ambassador or for those few who retired with the personal rank of career Ambassador. 

For current employees, long-standing custom and practice, however, has established a clear 

tradition in the Department and in the Foreign Service that persons who have served as 

ambassador after Senate confirmation may continue to use the title after such service in 

appropriate communications with others, may be referred to in communications and 

conversations by the title of Ambassador, and may be introduced to public audiences by the 

title. 

The Department has also clarified the use of the title for persons who have retired from the 

Foreign Service or left government service who served as ambassador after Senate 

confirmation. An amendment to the various regulations permits the use of the title, 

“Ambassador, Retired,” for all such persons. 

Although the United States does not use the term, "Excellency," some countries do when 

referring to ambassadors. Even if the host country uses the term "Excellency," American 

chiefs of mission in those countries are addressed as "Mr./Madam Ambassador" by U.S. 

citizens. Foreign chiefs of mission who are accredited to the US are also referred to as 

ambassadors. 
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U.S. Government Titles 

In most cases, the spouse of a government official does not share the official's title with 

his/her spouse (i.e., the President's spouse is Mr./Mrs. Washington or Ms. Lincoln). 

Executive Branch

• Mr./Madam President 

• Mr./Madame Vice President 

• All members of the cabinet are addressed as Mr./Madam Secretary except 

Mr./Madam Attorney General 

Below the rank of Secretary, U.S. Government officials are addressed by their own name: 

Mr./Madam Reynolds, not Mr./Madam Undersecretary. 

Judicial Branch

• Mr./Madam Chief Justice 

• Mr./Madam Justice 

Legislative Branch

Senate—Senator Williams 

House—Mr./Madam Speaker of the House, and Mr./Madam Williams for a state 

representative. The titles "Congressman" and "Congresswoman" are becoming more 

common in social usage, but are not, strictly speaking, correct forms of address. 

State Government Titles 

• Governor Adley 

• Mayor Scott or Mr./Madam Mayor 

II. U.S. MISSION CULTURE 

While less formal than interactions at international functions, mission behavior is also 

governed by specific guidelines. Following these guidelines ensures a pleasant working 

environment and efficient mission operation. 

Before Arrival 
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It is a long-standing custom to write to the chief of mission at your new post when you find 

out about your assignment. This letter should express your interest in the new assignment and 

offer your services before your departure. Writing to your new supervisor is a thoughtful, 

although not required, gesture. If writing to a new supervisor, a letter is the traditional form, 

but using technology such as e-mail messages is often acceptable as well. The once-common 

practice of newly assigned spouses writing to the principal officer's spouse is now rather 

unusual and generally not expected. 

The administrative staff will need to know about the details of your arrival. Administrative 

staff members will help you with specific arrangements for housing, shipping belongings and 

any other logistical matters. The person you will be replacing is also a valuable resource and 

you should consider contacting him/her for advice. 

Arriving at Post 

You should make the post aware of your travel plans so arrangements can be made to meet 

you, help you through customs, and provide transportation to a hotel, temporary or assigned 

housing. Many posts assign a sponsor to meet newcomers at the airport, look after their 

immediate needs and introduce them to the mission community. 
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As a general rule, you will meet with an administrative or personnel officer at post soon after 

arrival. Most newly arrived officers are expected to advise the mission upon arrival either by 

phone or in person. However, the next business day is also acceptable at many posts. 

Welcoming 

Each post has its own traditional way of greeting newcomers and introducing them to other 

members of the mission. A personnel officer or an orientation packet will explain this 

process. Usually, the employee will be introduced to senior officers and colleagues at the 

office, but family members may meet members of the mission community in a variety of 

ways. Individuals or couples may call on you (the employee), you may call on them, parties 

may be planned, or the post may sponsor periodic receptions for arriving and departing 

families. These events are designed to help ease your family's transition. The employee and

the family will benefit from participation in these customary welcoming procedures. 

Making Calls 

The purpose of making calls is to introduce yourself at post. The more people you meet, the 

more likely you are to be comfortable and successful in a new assignment. There are two 

different kinds of calls: office (also known as official) calls and social calls. Office calls are 

actually face-to-face meetings, not telephonic contacts, and take place in the office or 

residence of the person being called upon. Office calls continue to be the primary way of 

meeting the individuals with whom the employee will be working. Social calls, or personal 

visits to another's home, are still made at some posts but informal introductory social 

functions, phone calls, and invitations are used more often as a way of getting acquainted. In 

the past, both types of calls involved the exchange of social calling cards but this gesture has 

mostly been replaced in business settings with the exchange of business cards and almost 

entirely eliminated in social settings. Be sure that you are following your mission's customs. 

If the post has a protocol officer, check with him/her for details. If not, consult your sponsor 

or supervisor for guidance. 

Office Calls

New members of the staff should call upon the Ambassador or principal officer within two 

working days. Usually, new employees are taken around the mission to see the facility and 

meet colleagues on the first day. This introductory tour often serves the purpose of the "call 

on colleagues"; another may not be necessary. If, for some reason, you are not introduced to 

others, ask whether it would be appropriate for you to make appointments to introduce 

yourself. You will not need to use calling cards for the calls you make within the U.S. 

mission. 
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If your new position requires that you deal with the host country government or with its 

citizens, you should make appointments to meet them in their offices. Often, chiefs of 

mission are expected to make office calls upon all other foreign chiefs of mission in order of 

diplomatic precedence. Other officers are not expected to call on their counterparts at other 

missions, although they may decide to do so. If you do make such calls, you may ask a coworker who is already acquainted with the other person to accompany you as a means of 

formal introduction. Official calling cards may or may not be used depending on local 

customs, but business cards will probably be exchanged. Colleagues at post can usually 

suggest the names and positions of the individuals to be called upon. 

A third-person diplomatic note to the host country generated in the post's personnel office 

may announce the arrival of new officers, usually high-ranking officials. Others are 

announced when the mission issues its biannual diplomatic list. However, officers serving at 

smaller posts often find that their pending arrival is widely known and/or eagerly anticipated, 

so do not assume anonymity based on rank. 

The Foreign Affairs Manual (Volume 2) contains more information about when calls are 

expected, such as special occasions, national holidays, military visits, the deaths of 

dignitaries, and on visits to the capital of a third country. 

Social Calls

A social call is a visit to the home of the person being called upon. Although becoming less 

common, some countries' customs may continue to require formal social calls as the 

employee's primary method of meeting both business and social associates. Since the custom 

has been virtually abandoned in the United States, you may not be familiar with how it is 

done. A few guidelines for practicing the art of making a social call follow. 

One call, either official or social, may satisfy the requisite need to make a call in both 

instances. Although spouses have no obligation to make either official or social calls, it is 

acceptable for them to accompany the employee on social calls. If the spouse chooses, he or 

she may make a social call alone upon the spouses of the employee's colleagues, either 

within or outside the mission environment. In some cultures, social calls for the employee 

and/or spouse are considered obligatory. Check with post for local practices. When making 

an appointment for a social call, indicate if a colleague or spouse will accompany you. 

Children are generally not included unless specifically invited. Stay no longer than 

approximately 20 minutes unless urged to do so by the host(ess). 

According to strict protocol rules, social calls that foreign colleagues make on the employee 

and/or spouse are returned within a week or two. However, depending upon local custom, 

social calls may or may not require return calls. Check with post for guidance. 

Acknowledging calls from people within the U.S. mission is less formal and often as simple 

as inviting the person who called to your next social function. 
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Check with the protocol officer or Community Liaison Officer at post about possibilities for 

informally meeting other U.S. families. Generally, established families introduce themselves 

to newcomers and include them in planned activities rather than engaging in formal social 

calls or exchanging calling cards. 

Business Cards 

The traditional calling card that bears only one’s name and title, if appropriate, has yielded to 

the more versatile business card. The business card may include one’s name, rank or 

diplomatic title, office or section, business address, telephone and fax numbers, and e-mail 

address. Business cards do not have prefixes, i.e., Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Dr. (MD or PhD would 

follow the name when appropriate.) Military ranks and Ambassador do precede the name. 

While there are no strict guidelines for family members, the general consensus is that 

business cards are a classy way to exchange information for all. It may be that the family 

member has taken a leave of absence from a job in the United States but still has professional 

interests. 

It is wise to seek advice from the Security Office at post about what information should be 

printed on the card. There should be no reference to the embassy unless that is the only 

address or phone number that Security advises using. A family member is not entitled to 

display a USG crest on the card but the member may wish to have a picture or appropriate 

emblem on it. Prefixes such as Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Dr. are never used on business cards. 

Responsibilities at Post 

A U.S. ambassador serving abroad symbolizes the sovereignty of the United States and 

serves as the personal representative of the President of the United States. Ambassadorial 

duties include negotiating agreements, reporting on political, economic and social conditions, 

advising on policy options, protecting American interests, and coordinating the activities of 

all U.S. Government agencies and personnel in the country. By virtue of the position, 

Ambassadors at post rely on the support of and are afforded special courtesies by the entire 

mission staff. These courtesies apply to the ambassadors of other countries as well. 
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In direct conversation, address an ambassador as Mr./Madam Ambassador or Ambassador 

Jones. His/her spouse should be referred to as Mr./Mrs. Jones or Ms. Smith, if the spouse is a 

woman who kept her maiden name after marriage. It is proper to rise when an ambassador 

and/or his/her spouse enters a room just as you would for the chief of state. When making 

introductions to an ambassador, everyone but a chief of state is presented to him/her. In other 

words, the ambassador's name and title is stated first, then the person being introduced. An 

ambassador and his/her spouse precede all others when entering or leaving a room. The 

official place for the ambassador in the car is the backseat, curbside. His/her car is allowed to 

pass before all others. At ceremonies that take place on ships, the ambassador is the first to 

step on deck and the first to step off, and at airport ceremonies, he/she is the last to board and 

the first to disembark. When you attend social functions that the ambassador and other highranking U.S. officers are also attending, you should arrive approximately fifteen minutes 

early and make a special point to greet these officers. A personal greeting, however, is not 

necessary at a very large reception. Many of these courtesies are also extended to senior 

officers and visiting officials such as members of the Cabinet or Congress. 

From time to time, the ambassador may ask employees to escort guests, substitute for 

him/her at meetings, or help at social functions. If you have been invited by the ambassador 

to a social event, it is important to know the role you will be expected to play. Chances are 

the invitation was issued for a business reason. Study the guest list in advance and arrive at 

least fifteen minutes early and offer your help. This usually includes greeting the guests and 

moving them away from the receiving line. Both the employee and his/her spouse should 

circulate and mingle, although not together. At these events, embassy staff will be busy 

ushering the guests and mingling; therefore, remember to eat before leaving home. Social 

functions are very important to the work of the mission. If your help is necessary, you may 

need to reschedule other commitments. It is perfectly acceptable to explain to a colleague 

that a senior officer needs your help. If you must depart before the event concludes, inform 

the ambassador's secretary before the event so that the ambassador can have a mental list of 

who is there and who is not to help him/her through the event. 

Hierarchy 

Diplomatic ranks can be confusing and unfamiliar. The following list ranks many of the 

positions (from the top down) one may find in a U.S. embassy. Not all positions exist in 

every embassy. 

Ambassador Extraordinary and Plenipotentiary 

Ministers Plenipotentiary 

Ministers 

Chargé d'Affaires ad hoc or pro tempore 

Charge d' Affaires ad interim 

Minister-Counselors 

Counselors (or Senior Secretaries in the absence of Counselors) 
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Army, Naval and Air Attachés 

Civilian Attaches not in the Foreign Service 

First Secretaries 

Second Secretaries 

Assistant Army, Naval and Air Attachés 

Civilian Assistant Attaches not in the Foreign Service 

Third Secretaries and Assistant Attachés 

When more than one ambassador is present in country, their order of precedence is 

determined by the order in which they presented their credentials to the country's chief of 

state. All ambassadors defer to the Dean of the Diplomatic Corps, a position earned by virtue 

of longevity as his/her country's representative. When a country has more than one 

ambassador posted to multiple missions, the order of precedence among them is determined 

by the customs of their country. 

III. HOST COUNTRY CULTURE 

Outside the formal international diplomatic culture, another circle of customs and attitudes 

exists at the homes and private gatherings of host country citizens. Remember that as a guest, 

one is expected to respect the host's culture. Culture, of course, is unique to each country. 

Researching publications that describe in detail the particular customs of your new post 

before your departure will facilitate the transition process. 

This booklet outlines several areas of common concern. The following "social red flags" 

signal situations of which one should be particularly aware. 

Social Red Flags 

• Invitations and responses 

Cultural differences abound in issuing and responding to invitations. In most cases, the 

invitation will come addressed to all the family members invited. If a spouse is not 

specifically named, he/she is probably not invited. It is inappropriate to bring a date to a 

working event. However, in some places, one invitation addressed to the family is meant to 

include everyone in the house, even guests and visitors. Responding is very important and 

should be done, generally by phone, within two days of receiving the invitation. Be sure to 

observe the request on the invitation. "Regrets only" means to call only if you will not attend, 

and "RSVP" means to respond whether you will or will not attend. 

• Greetings and forms of address 
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Although you should follow the guidelines about greeting, addressing and introducing 

someone in the formal international scene, you will need to learn about the local informal 

customs as well. Try to learn a few polite greetings in the native language that will get you 

through the more casual social situations. You will also need to be aware of different greeting 

rituals such as kisses, handshakes or bows. In some countries, for example, it is not 

uncommon to see men show affection. Tremendous differences exist in how close people 

stand to socialize, how loudly they speak, and how much eye contact they maintain. The best 

advice is to be observant and ask questions of the Foreign Service nationals and experienced 

officers at post. Show interest and concern in learning a different culture; most people will 

respond graciously. 

• Local concept of social time 

In some countries, an invitation for 8:00 p.m. means you should arrive at precisely 8:00 p.m. 

In some other countries, it means you should arrive no earlier than 9:30 p.m. To avoid 

awkward and embarrassing situations, ask questions before attending social events. The 

Foreign Service nationals who work in the mission are a valuable resource, as are 

experienced officers at post. 

• Dress 

Dress, too, varies according to country and event. Women should be particularly mindful of 

conservative dress rules, such as skirt length, low necklines, and having one's arms covered. 

Remember that "casual" in other countries almost never means jeans or shorts. It is always 

better to be too dressed up than too dressed down. (For more details, see Chapter V.) 

• Conversation topics 

Be aware that there are cultural differences about what constitutes casual conversation. In 

some places, it is perfectly acceptable for someone to ask your age or income. Knowing what 

is appropriate and what to expect helps one avoid problems. Acceptable casual conversation 

topics vary from culture to culture. Discussing children or food is rude in some cultures. 

Because one circulates at social events in order to meet as many people as possible, 

conversations should be fairly brief. 

• Gifts 

Even something as simple as bringing a gift to the host can be tricky. Many rituals and 

customs often surround the meaning of gifts. The type, color and number of flowers you 

bring, for example, may have a hidden meaning. In Italy, mums are funeral flowers; think 

twice about bringing them to a dinner party. A guest may be expected to bring a small gift, or 

it may be better to bring nothing at all. Once again, asking colleagues and co-workers about 

local customs will be most helpful. 

• Eating and drinking 
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To be polite, accept the food and drink that is offered. If unsure or a bit apprehensive, try a 

small portion. If you do not wish to drink alcohol, still take some to have in your glass for 

toasts. If you do drink, however, as a U.S. representative, you should drink responsibly so as 

not to embarrass yourself or your country. If, for health or religious reasons, you absolutely 

cannot try even a small portion of a particular food or drink, it is acceptable to refuse with a 

short explanation. Consider new foods and drinks an opportunity to explore the new culture. 

Try them in good spirits and with an open mind. 

• Gender issues 

Gender roles vary from country to country, and sometimes even within regions of one 

country. For example, a husband may be expected to precede his wife in a receiving line, or 

men and women may go into separate rooms for dessert. Although men and women may drift 

away from each other and talk amongst themselves, the practice of actually separating men 

and women at any time during a dinner party is rare even in primarily gender-biased 

societies. Be aware that this may happen and when it does, it is best to go along with these 

traditions. Lacking a specific mission agenda, the diplomat's role is not to change host 

country customs. The country may not consider gender bias an issue that needs to be 

addressed. 

• Status 

When everyone is treated respectfully, only a few status issues merit special note. As 

mentioned earlier, stand when an ambassador and his/her spouse enter the room, and allow 

him/her to enter and exit a room first. When making introductions, introduce someone to the 

more distinguished or older person. In addition, reserve the far right-hand seat of a couch, as 

you sit, for the guest of honor. 

• Thank you 

Rituals often surround thanking someone. Without exception, thank your host before you 

leave. Tradition determines how you should thank the host the day after the event. 

What, how and when to send gifts may be different depending on the customs of your post. 

In most cases, a hand-written note is sufficient, but to be seen as an appreciative guest, look 

into the customs of your new country. 

Being a Guest 

In addition to the social red flags, be aware of other guest responsibilities. These guidelines 

hold true whether you are attending a formal international event or a local party. 
17

If you are a parent, you may be reluctant to leave your children behind when attending social 

functions. However, in most cases, children may not accompany their parents. Most social 

events for business or pleasure will not include children. If the event does include children, 

the invitation will make it very clear. 

The tradition of toasting is practiced around the world. In most countries, a guest who is 

being toasted remains seated and does not drink to the toast. The honored guest makes a 

reply by standing and offering a toast to the host and hostess. 

Leave a party at a reasonable hour, no matter how much fun you are having. Leaving early is 

better than overstaying one's welcome. But be aware that in some countries, a reasonable 

hour may be very late by U.S. standards. It is best not to leave prior to the departure of the 

senior official of any nationality. Do not leave before the guest of honor or the senior 

representative of your mission leaves, especially if you are helping to host a U.S. event. Be 

sure to thank the hosts before you depart, keeping the farewells brief. 

You should thank your hosts in writing or by phone the next day unless the event was a very 

informal event or a very large reception. Thank you notes are hand-written and signed 

without courtesy titles (i.e., Mark Roberts, not Mr. Roberts). If you feel the situation merits a 

more elaborate thank you, let local custom be your guide for an appropriate response. 

Resources 

In most countries, an understood grace period for cultural blunders exists. That time should 

be sufficient for you to absorb the nuances of the culture, but if you need more concrete 

references, here are several suggestions: 

• The ambassador's secretary can explain inviting and responding procedures. 

• The Community Liaison Officer should have a good understanding of the local 

culture. 

• The post protocol officer should be able to answer your questions. 

• Foreign Service Nationals (FSNs) or Host Country Nationals (HCNs) are excellent 

resources. 

• The Transition Center’s Overseas Briefing Center publishes cultural guides for many 

countries. Ask for one prior to departure. The OBC also maintains a cross-cultural 

bibliography of commercial resources. 

• For extremely proper (but not country-specific) guidelines, Protocol: The Complete 

Handbook of Diplomatic, Official and Social Usage, 25th Anniversary Edition by 

Mary Jane McCaffree, Pauline Innis, and Richard M. Sand, is also helpful. 
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IV. ENTERTAINING 

Entertaining widens one's circle of friends among officials and private citizens of the host 

country and other Foreign Service officers and diplomats. It also facilitates the informal 

exchange of information. Just as being a guest at a host country event affords the American 

diplomat an opportunity to experience the host country's culture, guests of embassy officers 

will expect to experience American culture. When planning the event, one must carefully 

consider whom to invite and how formal or informal the event will be. Also, be aware of the 

local customs on reciprocity. 

The ambassador fulfills the obligation for formal entertaining for the mission; however, 

many staff members often have entertaining responsibilities as well. The type of entertaining 

depends on one's preferences, purpose, resources, and available facilities. For example, 

events can be hosted at one's home, a local restaurant, or club. Representational events need 

not be large, elaborate, or expensive. In many situations, a simple lunch or a backyard 

barbeque can be more effective (and enjoyable) than an elaborate dinner or reception. 

For many posts, the most common place for official entertaining is in the home. When 

planning an event, consider the following: 

• Consult the embassy calendar (kept by the Protocol Officer or the secretary to the 

Ambassador or Principal Officer) to ascertain that the proposed date is appropriate 

(i.e., not a holiday or the date of scheduled entertainment by others in the mission). 

Weekday evenings are the most common times for official staff entertaining. In fact, 

official entertaining rarely occurs outside the workweek. In many cultures, weekend 

days and evenings are reserved for family and social functions. 

• If the event is to be a seated meal, consult the Protocol Officer for proper seating 

arrangements. 

• Review plans in terms of local food and drink preferences, entertaining space, 

weather probabilities and the language abilities of proposed guests. 

• If colleagues from the Mission are being invited to assist, they should be sent a guest 

list in advance of the event. 

• It is helpful to make arrangements well in advance if equipment is to be borrowed or 

extra helpers hired. Include security and parking arrangements here, if appropriate. 
19

Whom to Invite 

Everyone in the diplomatic and consular community understands the need to make friends 

quickly. Therefore, it is perfectly acceptable to invite new acquaintances, as well as 

individuals one wishes to meet, even before receiving an invitation from them. When 

members of the host government are invited, the event becomes an official function of the 

U.S. Mission and international protocol is in order. Well in advance of the invitations being 

sent, the protocol officer and/or senior officers at post should review the proposed guest list. 

A common way to extend an invitation to a formal event and/or official function is through 

official stationary cards followed by a telephone call. Increasingly, however, the invitation is 

extended over the phone, and a card is sent as a reminder. Letterhead and calling cards are 

seldom used. Handwritten invitations on informals are a good way to extend invitations 

without the expense of having invitations printed. Some posts have blank stock, others do 

not. Check in advance to determine if this is an option at your post. As the RSVPs arrive, the 

protocol officer may be able to help design a proper seating arrangement. 

The long-standing dilemma when entertaining abroad is the variation in responses to 

invitations. Invited guests may accept an invitation, but not attend. Others may not RSVP at 

all. Invited guests sometimes bring uninvited guests or arrive late. Differences in the 

country's cultural norms and perceptions of socially acceptable behavior account for these 

variations. When it is crucial to have an accurate guest list, one might telephone the invitees 

to ask if they will attend. 

Differences in the concept of social time affect the role of the host as well as that of the 

guest. Find out whether the time on an invitation will be adhered to, or taken to mean two 

hours later. If guests arrive late according to custom, they will probably also leave late. The 

only way to learn these intricacies is by asking at post. 

When making the guest list, do not assume that higher-ranking U.S. officers are off-limits. 

They often consider it a pleasant change of pace to attend less formal social functions. To 

accommodate them, check with the ambassador's or principal officer's secretary, and confirm 

the date to avoid scheduling conflicts. 

Informal Entertaining 

At most posts, informal entertaining is not only appropriate, but also the easiest and most 

representative of the way Americans entertain at home. Informal events encourage both the 

guests and the host(ess) to relax and circulate. Furthermore, if guests feel that they will not be 

competing with the gala event of the year, they are more likely to reciprocate. 
20

Informal parties can take many forms, such as family-style meals, buffet lunches, and 

suppers, barbecues, picnics and tea parties. The key to any event is to move the guests around 

so they can talk to different people. Accomplish this by serving in several rooms, planning 

interactive games or music and dancing. 

Buffet style is an excellent way to serve informal meals. The host(ess) or waiter may serve 

guests from the buffet, or guests may serve themselves. Tableware may be part of the buffet 

service or the table may be set in advance. Tables of six or eight people are more conducive 

to conversation than tables of four. If you choose not to set up tables, at least clear coffee 

tables and end tables so the guests can put down their dishes. A few tables for guests who are 

not comfortable eating from plates on their laps is a thoughtful touch. 

If using place cards, follow the rules of precedence to determine who will be placed in the 

seat of honor (for a man, the seat to the right of the hostess and for a woman, the seat to the 

right of the host). If there is no prepared seating plan, ranking guests should be invited to sit 

at the host's table. 

Unless there is a receiving line, the host(ess) and his/her spouse should stand near the 

entrance to greet guests as they arrive and also to say good-bye as they leave. 

Formal Entertaining 

Guests, Seating, and Service

As the host(ess) of a formal event, one may call on U.S. Mission colleagues to serve as "cohosts." Representational entertaining is a shared responsibility among officers at post. Formal 

entertaining includes a variety of representational events, meetings, and activities, as well as 

"black tie" and "white tie" dinners and receptions. A formal printed invitation should be 

issued well in advance, usually four to six weeks ahead. Invitations may also be extended by 

a phone call followed by a reminder card. 

Prepare a guest list that shows the title or profession of each guest and make that list 

available in advance to the mission staff members who will be co-hosting with you. 

Occasionally, other guests or Ministry officials may request the list; it may be appropriate to 

provide it to them. It is appropriate to provide the list to the guest(s) of honor. 

One may wish to consult the post's protocol officer for advice in creating a guest list and 

seating arrangement. The number of guests, their names and positions, the purpose of the 

party, and the shape and number of tables are but a few of the details that need to be 

addressed. Guidelines for seating and service follow, but keep in mind that they may be 

adapted to each event. 
21

Both the guest of honor and other guests must know who has the place of honor. In the 

United States, the place of honor for a man is at the right of the hostess; for a woman, it is 

at the right of the host. However, in some countries, the place of honor is at the left of the 

host/hostess. The host and hostess can sit at opposite ends or across from one another at the 

same table. They may also be seated at separate tables. If so, each chooses a co-host or cohostess, creating two more seats of honor. Co-hosts and co-hostesses are usually ranking 

guests or colleagues from the U.S. Mission. After the guest of honor and the host(ess) or cohost(ess) are seated, the arrangement goes by rank, gender, and nationality. As a general rule, 

couples sit across the table from each other, not side-by-side. Several examples of possible 

seating arrangements are illustrated below. To seat 8, 12, 16, or 20 people without two men 

or two women sitting together, the hostess sits to the left of the seat that is properly hers. 

("W" represents a female guest; "M" represents a male guest.) This allows the M seat of 

honor to still be at the hostess’s right. However, unless you divide the “honored couple,” 

invariably one couple will be seated side by side. 

Sample Seating Arrangement for Eight 

 

Sample Seating Arrangement for Fourteen 

The most common arrangement places the host and hostess at the head and foot of the table. 

("W" represents a female guest; "M" represents a male guest.) 

Host M1

W2 M3 W3 

W1 M2 Hostess 

W2 M4 W6 M5 W3 M1 

W1 M3 W5 M6 W4 M2 

Host Hostess
22

Sample Seating Arrangement for a Men's/Women's Luncheon or Dinner 

For same-sex events with only a host or hostess, a better balance of rank may be achieved by 

designating a co-host and having the host and co-host seated opposite of each other at the 

center of the table. 

As a general rule, an even number of men and women alternate seats at a table. In American 

homes, foreign guests take precedence over Americans of comparable rank with the 

exception of the Ambassador of the United States. The Ambassador is seated as a host or 

hostess to avoid seating precedence conflicts. This courtesy also applies to the ambassador's 

spouse. If an unequal number of men and women (or individuals of more than one 

nationality) are in attendance, alternate both the sexes as well as the nationalities. One 

possibility is to seat the host(ess) and the guest of honor opposite each other in the middle of 

the long sides of the dining table and then alternate from there. The husband of a highranking female official is seated commensurately; do not demote him. When many highranking officials are expected to attend the event, if possible, seat them in a manner such that 

many hold a seat of honor. An excellent way of doing this is to use round tables. Using round 

tables is also helpful in minimizing disruptions if place settings must be removed at the last 

minute. 

Place a seating chart in the entrance hall so that each guest may find his/her place before 

entering the dining room. Although rarely practiced today, men might be given a "take-in 

card" which designates a particular woman to escort to the table. Place cards are used when 

there are more than eight guests. Place them above the plates with the names and titles visible 

to the guests seated at either side. For the benefit of the guests across the table, consider 

printing the names on the back of the cards as well. When there are many tables, a table chart 

is often used to assist guests in locating their table. 

M9 M5 M1 Host M3 M7 M11 

M12 M8 M4 Co-host M2 M6 M10 
23

One waiter for every six to eight guests is generally sufficient. Guests may be served in 

sequence around the table or women may be served before men. If guests are served in 

sequence, the woman on the host's right is served first. The man to her right is served next, 

and service proceeds counter clockwise so that the host is served last. If women are served 

first, the woman on the host's right is served at the same time as the woman to his left. Two 

servers then proceed clockwise around the table to the women and then to the men. If there is 

only one server per table, the direction of service should be reversed after each course so that 

the same guests are not always served last. Local customs for serving should be observed. 

As mentioned above, seek advice at post about the local customs on toasts and drinking in 

general. Usually, toasts are made with the dessert course. At the end of the meal, the host or 

hostess makes the first move to leave the table. Guests then follow in order of precedence. 

Coffee may be served in another room. 

For suggestions on menus, table settings and decorations, consult an etiquette book or a 

cookbook designed for entertaining. 

Receiving Lines

At formal receptions, a receiving line enables the host and hostess to greet each guest 

personally. Usually, the host stands first and the hostess stands second. However, the hostess 

may defer to guests of honor and stand after them in line. To stand in line and receive guests 

with a drink or cigarette in your hand is considered discourteous. 

An official staff member may introduce each guest; guests may also introduce themselves. 

All U.S. staff members should help the host(ess) attend to the guests by "taking them off the 

line"; greeting them as they finish the receiving line, accompanying them to the refreshments, 

and integrating them into conversations. 

At the end of the event, the host should be available near the exit to say good-bye to guests. 

At an event hosted by the Ambassador, Deputy Chief of Mission, Public Affairs Officer, or 

agency head, staff members should stay until all foreign guests have departed. 

Toasts 

A verbal greeting, a toast is also given in tribute to someone. Hosts of diplomatic dinners 

often offer two toasts, one being a welcome toast to everyone in the room. This toast is 

usually offered after the first course is served to all guests. Another toast to the guest of 

honor is offered at the beginning or at the end of the dessert course. It is helpful to practice 

your toast beforehand and to be brief. 
24

When giving a toast, rise in place and speak to the entire room. Raise your glass to eye level 

and look toward the honored person and drink, making eye contact with the honored person. 

You should then nod and put your glass on the table and sit down. The person being toasted 

should never drink to himself/herself. A nod or smile of appreciation can suffice for a 

response, or the honored person can return the toast by rising afterwards and offering a 

formal response. 

V. DRESS 

Through tradition and usage, diplomats have come to wear certain kinds of clothes for certain 

occasions. Your "uniform" will depend on the function, be it casual or formal. This section 

gives a description of each kind of dress and the occasions for which they are appropriate. 

Keep in mind that local customs impose many modifications, so be sure to check at post. 

Sometimes, wearing the country's ethnic or national dress in lieu of traditional dress is 

appropriate. 

In various parts of the world, a specific nomenclature for dress has arisen. Contrary to the 

common meaning within U.S. culture, in the diplomatic community, "informal dress" equates 

to business dress (see below). In some parts of the world, other terms for informal dress for 

men include "lounge suit", "national dress," "tenue de ville," "planters," "shirt and tie," 

"island casual," and "bush shirt." "Planters" refers to a long sleeved white shirt with a tie and 

dark trousers. "Bush shirt" is a long or short-sleeved shirt with a finished bottom edge worn 

outside rather than tucked into the slacks, or a long or short sleeved embroidered man's shirt. 

"Island casual" means a Hawaiian shirt and casual (usually khaki) slacks. 

Similarly, various terms apply to formal dress for men. "Tuxedo" and "smoking jacket" mean 

black tie, whereas a "Red Sea Rig" or "Gulf Rig" means a tuxedo minus the jacket. "Dinner 

jacket" may refer to either a dark-colored or white jacket. If you are unsure of the 

terminology used, it is always appropriate to clarify before the event. 

For many posts, the overwhelming choice for day-to-day business is a suit and tie for men 

and a business suit or conservative dress for women. Men and women of all ranks of staff 

and spouses are expected to bring this type of clothing. Many posts stress that daily attire 

closely resembles that seen in Washington, DC. Although suitable dress clothing for men can 

often be purchased at post, it is often limited and expensive. The selection for women may be 

larger, but the clothing is often limited and expensive as well. Business attire for women is 

usually appropriate for official evening functions. 

Occasionally, business attire will not be appropriate. Below are some dressing guidelines to 

help clarify the lines between formal and casual wear, day and evening wear. As always, 

exceptions to the rule exist, so be observant and inquire at post. 
25

Formal "Black Tie" or "White Tie" 

Formal wear may be worn at evening performances of the opera, the theater, balls, and for 

the most formal of dinners and evening affairs. Black tie is generally not worn in the 

daytime. White tie requires the additional formality of a cutaway ("tails") and white tie for 

men and a floor-length ball gown for women. Above all, let the information on the invitation 

be your guide. If the invitation is unclear, ask when you respond to the invitation. 

Male Attire

• Black, hip-length coat without tails and with silk or satin lapels (a white dinner coat 

may be worn in hot weather and the tropics) 

• Low-cut black waistcoat or cummerbund may be worn with a single-breasted coat. 

• Black trousers 

• White starched or pleated shirt or a soft evening shirt with studs instead of buttons 

• Wing, turn-down, or attached collar and black bow tie 

• Black shoes and socks 

• Hats and gloves are optional but not worn or carried indoors 

Female Attire

• Knee-length cocktail dress 

• Floor-length ball gown 

• Long skirt with top 

• High-heeled shoes or dressy flats 

• Above-elbow gloves are optional with a sleeveless evening gown, and short gloves 

may be worn with a long-sleeved gown. If worn, gloves need not be removed for a 

receiving line or dancing, but are removed prior to eating or drinking. 

Semi-formal/Informal 

Semi-formal/informal wear may be worn for cocktail parties, dinners, some dances, the 

theater, the opera, and evening receptions. 

Male Attire

• Dark suit 

• Tie or bow tie 

• Dark shoes and socks 

Female Attire

• Short cocktail dress 

• Gloves are optional 
26

• High-heeled shoes or dressy flats 

Casual 

Unlike the United States, most countries do not define casual as jeans and sneakers or 

sportswear. Shorts and jeans, for men and women, are considered inappropriate attire for 

social functions in many parts of the world. Instead, you will find that business attire is 

usually appropriate for an event specified as casual. Breakfast, lunch, daytime meetings, 

afternoon tea, and some receptions are generally considered casual, but the invitation should 

specify. 

Male Attire

• Business suit (light or dark) or 

• Sports jacket and pants 

• Tie or bow tie 

• Dress shoes or loafers 

Female Attire

• Business suit or daytime dress 

• Pumps or flats 

• Head coverings may be considered a requirement at some events. Wide-brim hats 

may also provide welcome and necessary protection from the sun; check with the 

post. 

Medals and Decorations 

Foreign Service officers are prohibited from accepting decorations from foreign 

governments. If you wish to wear war service decorations or civilian medals at formal day or 

evening events, check with the protocol officer. If appropriate, wear them on your left lapel 

or over the left breast pocket, U.S. military medals above U.S. civilian medals. 

SUMMARY 

Every U.S. Government employee should acquaint him/herself with the general rules of 

social conduct as well as those rules particular to a post or country of assignment. An 

understanding and acceptance of these rules will enhance relationships, whether formal, 

informal, official or unofficial, with people of other nations. 
27

To accomplish this, many resources are available to U.S. representatives, not the least of 

which are observation and interaction. The prudent employee, and family members, will 

supplement his/her knowledge by reading prior to arriving at post, participating in the post 

orientation program, and consulting with host country experts. The better prepared a 

representative and family members are, the more effective and pleasurable their overseas 

experience will be. 

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34

Glossary of Diplomatic Terms 

agrément—the host government's acceptance of the nomination of an ambassador to the 

country 

ambassador-designate—a diplomatic agent who has been designated by the President as 

his/her choice as personal representative but who has not yet been confirmed by the Senate 

and who has not taken the oath of office 

ambassador—an official envoy or diplomatic agent of the highest rank accredited to a 

foreign government as the official resident representative of his own government; or an 

official appointed for a special, often temporary, diplomatic assignment 

Ambassador—capitalized when referring to a specific person (i.e., Ambassador Scott) 

ambassador at large—an ambassador whose portfolio addresses specific issues rather than 

one specific country 

ambassador extraordinaire and plenipotentiary—a diplomatic agent who is the personal 

representative of the head of one state accredited to the head of another state 

attaché—a civilian or military technical expert or specialist on the mission 

chancery—the embassy office building 

chargé d'affaires—a diplomatic agent accredited by letter to the Minister of Foreign Affairs 

or Secretary of State of one country by his/her counterpart in lieu of a duly accredited 

ambassador 

chargé d'affaires ad interim—also referred to as charge; a subordinate diplomat who 

substitutes for an ambassador or minister in his/her absence 

chief of mission—principal officer of an overseas mission, with the title of Ambassador, 

Minister, or Charge d' Affaires 

consul—a consular officer of high rank, often at the First Secretary level, within an embassy 

consul-general—a consular officer of the highest rank; senior official at the consulate 

general 

consular agent—individual who performs limited consular functions in cities where there is 

no mission 
35

consulate—a constituent or subordinate post; also the office of the consul and his/her 

staff . 

consulate general—a large constituent or subordinate post 

counselor—a diplomatic title accorded to a head of a section in the embassy, such as 

"Counselor for Political Affairs" or "Political Counselor" 

demarche—a request or intercession with a foreign official, e.g., a request for support of a 

policy, or a protest about the host government's policy or actions 

deputy chief of mission (DCM)—the second in command at an embassy who becomes the 

charge d'affaires in the ambassador's absence 

diplomatic agent—a generic term denoting a person who carries out regular diplomatic 

relations of the nation he/she represents in the nation to which he/she has been accredited 

diplomatic note—a formal written means of communication among embassies 

diplomatic corps—the collective heads of foreign diplomatic missions and their staff 

members 

diplomatic immunity—exemption of foreign diplomatic agents or representatives from local 

jurisdiction 

diplomatic ranks 

Ambassador Extraordinary and Plenipotentiary 

Ministers Plenipotentiary 

Ministers 

Chargé d'Affaires ad hoc or pro tempore 

Chargé d'Affaires ad interim 

Minister-Counselors 

Counselors (or Senior Secretaries in the absence of Counselors) Army, Naval and Air 

Attaches 

Civilian Attachés 

First Secretaries 

Second Secretaries 

Assistant Army, Naval and Air Attachés 

Civilian Assistant Attachés 

Third Secretaries and Assistant Attachés 
36

dual accreditation—having two or more responsibilities, such as an ambassador who is 

simultaneously accredited to two nations 

embassy—a diplomatic mission in the capital city of a foreign country headed by an 

ambassador 

exequatur—written, official recognition of a consular officer issued by the government to 

which one is accredited 

interest section—the office responsible for protecting the interests of the United States, 

housed in a third country embassy, in a country with which the United States has no formal 

diplomatic relations 

legation—a diplomatic mission in a foreign country headed by a minister. The United States 

has none at present, but a few other countries do 

mission—a generic term for embassy. Mission also describes the entirety of official U.S. 

representation in a given foreign country which functions under the supervision of the 

Ambassador, including civilian and military personnel (except U.S. military reporting to a 

unified command and official U.S. representation to a multilateral organization). 

passport—the official document issued to a person by his/her government certifying 

citizenship and requesting foreign governments to grant the individual safe passage, lawful 

aid and protection while under that government's jurisdiction 

p.c.—used in written social correspondence, "pour condoler" (to express sympathy) 

p.f.—used in written social correspondence, "pour feliciter" (to extend congratulations) 

p.m.—used in written social correspondence, "pour memo ire" (to remind) 

p.p.—used in written social correspondence, "pour presenter" (to introduce) 

p.p.c.—used in written social correspondence, "pour prendre conge" (to say goodbye) 

p.r.—used in written social correspondence, "pour remercier" (to express thanks) 

persona non grata—an individual who is unacceptable to or unwelcome by the host 

government 
37

precedence—priority; the right to superior honor on a ceremonial or formal occasion; for 

ambassadors in a country, precedence is determined by the order in which they presented 

their credentials to the host government 

residence—the home/living quarters of the ambassador 

secretary (third, second, first)—diplomatic rank of officers posted overseas, in ascending 

order of seniority 

vice consul—a junior ranking consular officer 

visa—a seal or endorsement made on a passport by the proper officials of a country which 

entitles the bearer to apply for entry into another country at the port of admission