Trauma-Informed Care for Children Exposed to Violence

Tips for Parent Education Programs

Why should parent education programs address children’s exposure to violence?

Recent national surveys show that a large number of children are directly or indirectly exposed to violence in their 

homes, schools, and communities.1 Many families involved in parent education programs are likely to have been 

exposed to violence. Exposure to violence seriously impairs the physical, cognitive, and emotional development of 

children leading to seriously negative outcomes for children and a very large cost to society.

What happens when children are exposed to violence?

Children are very resilient—but they are not unbreakable. No matter what their age, children are deeply hurt when 

they are physically, sexually, or emotionally abused or when they see or hear violence in their homes and communities. 

When children see and hear too much that is frightening, their world feels unsafe and insecure. 

Each child and situation is different, but exposure to violence can overwhelm children at any age and lead to problems 

in their daily lives. Some children may have an emotional or physical reaction. Others may find it hard to recover from a 

frightening experience. Exposure to violence—especially when it is ongoing and intense—can harm children’s natural, 

healthy development unless they receive support to help them cope and heal.

What are some of the warning signs of exposure to violence?

Children’s reaction to exposure to violence can be immediate or appear much later. Reactions differ in severity and 

cover a range of behaviors. People from different cultures may have their own ways of showing their reactions. How a 

child responds also varies according to age. 

Young Children (5 and younger) 

Young children’s reactions are strongly influenced by caregiver 

reactions. Children exposed to violence in this age range may:

■ Be irritable or fussy or have difficulty calming down

■ Become easily startled

■ Resort to behaviors common to being younger (for 

example, thumb sucking, bed wetting, or fear of the dark)

■ Have frequent tantrums

■ Cling to caregivers

■ Experience changes in level of activity

■ Repeat events over and over in play or conversation

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1 Finkelhor, D., Turner, H., Ormrod, R., Hamby, S., & Kracke, K. (2009). Children’s Exposure to Violence: A Comprehensive 

National Survey. Washington, DC: US Department of Justice, Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention. Available at 

www.safestartcenter.org.
Safe Start: Working Together to Help Children Exposed to Violence

2 Children Exposed to Violence: Tips for Parents and Other Caregivers

What can parent education programs do?

Early intervention and treatment play a pivotal role in 

reducing the impact of exposure to violence on children 

and their families. Specifically, parent education programs 

can promote safe, stable, and nurturing relationships 

between children and caregivers. They can help parents 

by teaching them to create a predictable environment, 

to listen to their children, and to assure children and 

adolescents that whatever happened was not their fault. 

Improved parenting skills and relationships can enhance 

the lives of everyone in the family.2

To achieve successful outcomes, however, parent 

education programs must first recognize and address the 

history of exposure to violence in the families they serve 

because:

■ Under stress, parents may rely on familiar ways 

of parenting—even when they have learned new 

parenting skills and want to change their parenting 

behavior. 

■ A parent who has a poor developmental history, 

psychological difficulties, and/or a drug or alcohol 

disorder may not be emotionally available to learn 

skills that build better parent–child relationships. 

The parent’s own developmental needs may be so 

great that she cannot participate in programs that 

focus on her children. 

Elementary School-Age Children (6–12 years)

Elementary and middle school children exposed to violence may show 

problems at school and at home. They may:

■ Have difficulty paying attention 

■ Become quiet, upset, and withdrawn

■ Be tearful and sad and talk about scary feelings and ideas

■ Fight with peers or adults

■ Show changes in school performance

■ Want to be left alone

■ Eat more or less than usual

■ Get into trouble at home or school

Teenagers (13–18 years)

Older children may exhibit the most behavioral 

changes as a result of exposure to violence. 

Depending on their circumstances, teenagers may:

■ Talk about the event all the time or deny that 

it happened

■ Refuse to follow rules or talk back with 

greater frequency

■ Complain of being tired all the time

■ Engage in risky behaviors

■ Sleep more or less than usual

■ Increase aggressive behaviors

■ Want to be alone, not even wanting to spend 

time with friends

■ Experience frequent nightmares

■ Use drugs or alcohol, run away from home, 

or get into trouble with the law

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2 Several parent education programs have achieved success in improving parenting and child outcomes. Parent Management 

Education is mostly used to help parents with children engaged in seriously disobedient or destructive behaviors and in cases 

of child abuse and neglect. Project Safe Care, derived from Parent Management Education, has shown success in reducing 

child maltreatment. Triple P: Positive Parenting Program—first developed in Australia—follows a public health approach to 

the prevention of child maltreatment and out-of-home placements of maltreated children. The Incredible Years is designed 

to strengthen competencies in positive communication, consistent and clear limit setting, and nonviolent discipline strategies. 

Nurturing Parenting Program builds parenting skills to stop the cycle of child abuse and to reduce the rate of juvenile 

delinquency, alcohol abuse, and teen pregnancy. 1-2-3 Magic helps parents learn effective methods of controlling negative 

behavior, encouraging good behavior, and strengthening the child–parent relationship. 
Safe Start: Working Together to Help Children Exposed to Violence

3 Children Exposed to Violence: Tips for Parents and Other Caregivers

■ Several factors may reduce the effectiveness of 

parent education programs, including parental 

depression, drug addiction, or alcoholism; a parent’s 

low literacy skills and limited education; domestic 

violence and marital conflict; the blending of families 

after divorce; and excessive punishment of children.

■ Parents who are stressed by environmental 

conditions (for example, neighborhoods with 

recurrent violence, few adult role models, or 

persistent unemployment) may be less able to 

benefit from parent education programs. 

Specific ways that parent education programs can help 

parents of children exposed to violence include:

Being aware of the impact of exposure to 

violence on parenting capacity

Parent educators working with high-risk families should 

be supported and prepared to know how to respond 

to and work with families with a history of exposure to 

violence as a matter of routine practice. Knowing the 

types of problems parents are coping with (for example, 

substance addiction or mental disorders) can help 

identify issues that may affect parenting. 

Assessing the impact of exposure to 

violence on parenting capacity

An evaluation of parenting capacity requires the 

identification of how the unique constellation of 

problems and strengths in the family results in children’s 

parenting and safety needs being met. Observing 

parent–child interactions and assessing the quality of 

the home environment, the parent’s perception of child 

behavior, his social support networks, and his ability to 

solve problems are more important than identifying or 

diagnosing parental problems such as domestic violence.

Parent educators may find it worth exploring—when 

appropriate—the extent to which children are aware 

of their parents’ problems. Parents may minimize or 

underestimate the impact of their problems on their 

children because of their assumption that children have 

only a limited awareness of the problems. However, 

research has shown that children know a great deal more 

about their families’ problems than their parents realize.

Knowing and watching for signs of possible 

exposure to violence on children

Parent education programs can work with parents 

to develop skills to recognize potential indicators of 

exposure to violence such as unexplained changes in 

behavior and emotional signs such as depression, 

mood swings, and fearful or anxious behavior. 

Parents are in a good position to determine 

whether a young child is crying more than usual, 

is difficult to calm, startles easily, or screams and 

panics during sleep.

School-age children may become more aggressive 

and fight a lot, return to old fears or develop new 

ones, become apprehensive about going home, 

express a wish to be with other adults (such as 

teachers), or become overly active.

Teenagers may use violence to get what they 

want or may rebel in school. They may stop 

being concerned about their appearance or 

refuse to follow rules. 

Responding appropriately to 

children’s disclosures

A parent’s willingness to listen to a child’s 

story can provide the foundation on which to 

increase resilience and personal strength. The 

most meaningful assistance parent educators 
Safe Start: Working Together to Help Children Exposed to Violence

4 Children Exposed to Violence: Tips for Parents and Other Caregivers

Additional Resources

Directory of Evidence-Based Parenting Programs: http://whatworks.uwex.edu/Pages/2parentsinprogrameb.html 

Parent Training Programs: Insight for Practitioners: http://www.cdc.gov/ViolencePrevention/pub/parenting_meta-analysis.html 

Clearinghouse on Early Education and Parenting: http://ceep.crc.uiuc.edu/

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1 The report is available at http://www.safestartcenter.org/pdf/Evidence-Based-Practices-Matrix_2011.pdf.

For more information and resources, please contact the Safe Start Center, 

a National Resource Center for Children’s Exposure to Violence:

http://www.safestartcenter.org

1-800-865-0965

info@safestartcenter.org

Mandated Reporting

Many children experiencing crises or violence are also at risk for child abuse and neglect. All 

States have child welfare systems that receive and respond to reports of child abuse and neglect, 

offer services to families, provide foster homes for children who must be removed from their 

parents’ care, and work to find permanent placements for children who cannot safely return home.

Domestic violence does not equal child abuse and neglect, and therefore not all cases of 

domestic violence must be reported to child protective services. When responding to families 

affected by domestic violence, it is very important to consider simultaneously the safety of the 

child and the safety of the adult victim.

State by State information on reporting requirements can be found at 

http://www.childwelfare.gov/systemwide/laws_policies/state

can offer parents of children exposed to violence is to 

encourage skills that promote a safe and comfortable 

environment where children can talk. 

A child’s relationship with a caring adult is critical for 

developing resilience and beginning the healing process. 

It is very important that children have an opportunity to 

talk about what they have witnessed and how they feel 

with caring parents who can listen and understand.

Another important priority for parents is to create 

an emotionally safe place for all children to express 

themselves. These safe spaces will enable children who 

have been exposed to violence to begin their healing 

journey.

Helping parents find support from others 

who can provide specialized help 

Children exposed to violence may need specialized 

assessment and interventions that parents cannot 

provide. If that is the case, parents need to know where 

they can find help. Teachers, psychologists, school 

counselors, and even religious leaders can help children 

and their families. These professional can help by offering 

ways to keep the problems from getting worse. In some 

instances, they may help families find ways to stop the 

cycle of violence.