aimagic/big5essay huggingface dataset:
I will now try to track my cluttered and random thoughts. as they occur. I am thinking of the love of my life; my girlfriend. We have been together for quite a while and I am truly excited to be a part of her life. I wonder how much longer we will stay together, because I am hoping that my neurotic and almost unbearable tantrums won't strip us apart from each other. Anyway, I try desperately not to think of such negative possibilities, yet they plague my mind sometimes. I have just taken a glimpse of my surroundings. I have a gorgeous view to my right. two large windows forming a 90 degree angle provide a soothing sight. Everything seems tranquil outside, since I am not part of it right now. Everyone looks pleasant and kind, although once I leave this room I know very well that those same serene faces I saw from my fourth story view are far from angelic creatures waiting to befriend someone like me. I like having the security of this window quite a lot. It isn't as if I seclude myself from the rest  of the world at all times, or even want to for that matter, but when life is overwhelming in its abusive tendencies, a break from the constant interactions of it can be appreciated. I am more of a solitary person in these respects. I like to be alone. I like to have the opportunity to just think and think until my mind swells with confusion, questions and lack of answers. I can only speculate why things are the way they are, but this is what I am good at. I like to think without anyone pestering me with questions or remarks of disapproval. I play along with the narrow-minded each and every day and the jeers and taunting that accompanies such individuals. My privacy keeps me sane and feeds my need to vent any emotional clogging. These people who seem so distant from people like me are the same people I am left to befriend, because unfortunately, like any other human being of this world, I need friendship, companionship. It is a necessity. I hate to admit it, simply because I want to view myself as some sort of rebel or ultra independent, yet I know this to not be true. Yet, time after time I find that it is terribly difficult to maintain friends because I am left with people in college(the most convenient to meet) and I have had so little in common with such people. The cycle repeats and repeats. I am late for a class now because I wrote this damn thing, but this is my fault for not watching the time more closely. When I start to ramble about my life I REALLY RAMBLE about my life. Advantage or disadvantage????  I don't know yet. At least I can listen to others. good reason to be a psychology major, right?   

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: y
As I write this paper I am still filled with the stress, but know gets much worse. I have been hired for a job, and I am still pondering if it is possible to handle both a job and school. I guess you can call it greed about money, but I need it to stay here. I am also thinking that this to easy. College is supposed to be hard, and yet my hardest class is my Microeconomics. With all this stress I still have the one thought in my head. What if I was not born?  Would it be less stressful?  This is not a suicide letter, but the thought of me not being born always enters my mind. Is life nothing but work and school, or is it much more. I do not know I guess I am always thinking about the negative aspects of life. The world is not like peaches and cream. Tonight is a busy night. I have to do my laundry, and do some reading. I guess I am psyching myself out. And yet I am alone in a city that is surrounded by my burden. I do not know what the point of writing this. I guess I need the grade, but even then I wish why I can not be truly happy about my life. To think that some where around the world somebody is happy, and it makes me sick to think about that. Life is not fun and games it is a weary journey that must be gone through, but I can't rest my feet until I am done and gone. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: n
I'm pissed. I just sat here for twenty fuckin' minutes thinking I'm all bad ass and shit, trying to do this assignment and all along I was doing it wrong. Oh well, I really shouldn�t be cussing. I find this rather relaxing in a way. I'm feeling lazy the last couple of days have been very draggy. So right now I'm thinking that I'm a fat, short girl with a high self esteem is that possible? Anyway right now I'm feeling let me think of what I am feeling. I'm feeling exited because I get to go home this weekend. I get to see my boyfriend and family. I was just noticing that I worded that differently. Wrong it's family and boyfriend. I haven�t been home in a while, so it will be great to eat some home cooked food. So do you get some freaked out nutcases in these assignment? I meant to put an 's' but I was too lazy to go back. Yesterday I killed my roommate and her soul will be back to haunt me as I sleep. She was a weird little bitch anyway. I got the kitchen knife and stuck it in her head. I didn't like her head anyway. It was weirdish. And of coarse I'm just joking. I am a pathological, no compulsive liar. Right now I hate my stomach it sucks because it is so damn huge. You see I�m pregnant and it gets in the way sometimes, all the time. That is why I have not been home in such a long time. My dad would strangle me. Yeah so my boyfriend and I had a fling  one night, an unprotected fling and this is how I got in trouble. He then left me because he couldn�t handle the publicity, it would be bead for him. seeing as how he's a politician and all his wife would freak, so I got myself a new boyfriend and now he believes that the baby is his. Men are so dumb!!!!!!!! My roommate is always forgetting shit, it's fuckin' annoying the hell out of me I mean you can't carry a fuckin' convo. with the girl I wish   could kick her ass right here in front of all these ugly people. They can't stop me I'm mega bitch. She wants to go into mass comm. This is my message to her "GOOD fuckin' luck!!!!!!!!" oh well, I�m calm now. well, I was going to go on but it has been twenty minutes . Yes   type very very slow. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: y, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: y, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: n
I love this song. It reminds me of Plano, and when I hung out with my old friends. I wonder where they're at right now?  I wonder if they're ok, and if they're doing well at college. Where�s my roommate. He should be back by now. He must be eating. I wonder why this c. d. keeps skipping, I know it's not scratched. I can't wait till tonight. I can't forget about my laundry in twenty minutes. It better still be there when I go for it, or somebody's losing a leg. Actually, I trust most everyone on this floor because they're all pretty cool and I've met most all of them. The guy down the hall, he's pretty cool, he just isn't used to Texas life. the heat yes, since he's from Hawaii, but the people no. Should I rush a frat, or not. There are many great advantages to this, but I really don't want to join a bunch of guys I don't know and find out they're a bunch of losers, or drugees. I guess I'll never know until I decide to join, it's just whether or not I think they're cool. A lot, if not all of my friends, have joined a frat, so I can find out who likes their frat, and who doesn't to figure out which one I'd like to rush or pledge. I'm actually rushing them all, because there is no reason not to. My sister will give me the drop since she went here not to long ago. I'll ask here and get here to help me out because a lot of her friends are alumni's of the better frats. This part of the song is the best. It always makes me feel so happy, like I could do anything. Wait one sec, I have to sing along. Dangit, when is Susan going to call back, there are so many Plano people here in Austin I feel like I'm at high school all over again, just a bigger neighborhood to party in. I don't like driving here to much because there are no medians, and the speed limits aren't posted anywhere. I'm not used to having to drive sooo aggressively here. I mean I always drive aggressively, but I wonder if people here take offensive driving, instead of defensive driving. Now it is time for me to go take a safe walk, since my car is so dang far away. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: y, Neuroticism: n, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: n
I�m feeling a little stress coming on now, because I�m think about everything  I have to do, but have yet to start it. sometimes I can't resist going out with  friends and that is really bad, because then I don't have time to study. I  don't know what else I�m feeling right now. I�m just sitting in front of a  computer in the pcl and typing along. even though the paper doesn't not need correct spelling and stuff, I still go back and correct it(I guess cause it's a  habit). right now I�m observing people as they walk by. I really enjoy this  assignment, because it helps me to put all my thoughts and feelings on paper,  instead of holding them in ( as what I normally do)  I generally don't like to  tell people my feelings inside, I guess cause I�m very paranoid and I don't  trust others with my personal secrets, even if they were really close friends  of mine. I can't wait until later(6:00p. m. when I go practice my throwing of  footballs. I�m really excited about intramural football. most of the people  on my team are really nice. I�m just a little scared about the real games b/c  I�m afraid that the guys on the other coed I�m teams will run into me and hurt  me. I was really sore this morning, after I woke up b/c of football practice  yesterday morning. football practice was pretty fun. I enjoy going through  all the drills and practices. at first I wasn't too sure about playing I�m  football, but when one of my friends asked me to join her team I was like sure. our team makeup is kinda funny. we have all upperclassmen guys and mainly freshman girls. I just thought that was kinda interesting. well, I�m looking  at the clock and it seems like I have five more minutes of writing time. right after I do this assignment, I�m going to go study on the fourth floor. I really don't want to be left behind in my classes. I already am and that's  not a good way to start off my college years. in high school I studied  constantly and now I rarely get to study b/c there is so much stuff going on  and I usually give in to my friends when they want to go do something. I  think time really does fly by. before I know it, it's time to go to sleep again I wish I had nothing to worry about. I always wondered what my life would be like  if I was rich. it would be much more relaxing I think. well, it's already been  twenty minutes and I would write longer, but I really have got to go studying. I can't wait until I get to write paper 2, because I have a lot to say about my  college experience so far. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: n
well t. Today is Monday and this has been a really shitty day. This is my 5th time to turn in this assignment. Right now I am at my boyfriends house b/c my computer was as getting interrupted by the phone ringing. I did not know how to turn off the call waiting. So every time that I was going to turn in the assignment the phone would ring and I would have to start over. Well let's see I am from midland and I come from a family of 7. there are 3 boys and 2 girls. There names are Carla(25), Ian(23), Tony(20), Tina(me)(19), and then there is  jimbo (18  Carla and Ian are my half brother and sister. There last name is Umlauf, there grandfather is Charles Umlauf a sculpturist who passed way not too long ago. Ian and Carla are both graduating in December. Ian is majoring in art, and Carla in Sociology. Carla is also getting married in May. Tony is the majoring in engineering. He is so sweet!  Then there is me, a sophomore here at U. T. majoring in Elementary Education. My little brother is Jimbo, he is going to school in Florida in St. Augustine. He is playing baseball at Flagler University. I hope he does well. So all 5 of us are in college right now. Carla Ian Tony and me all go to school here at the university of Texas, and Jimbo in Florida. I have two roommates, they are cousins to each other. I lived with them last year at the dorm. Things are going okay I guess. They can get really annoying sometimes. I am glad that I have my own room so I don't always have to listen to them. Because they are cousins they tell each other anything. I mean that they will fight about anything. They will say things to each other that you normally would not say to a roommate, like you are being a bitch or that looks like shit on you. I don't know I just don't like listening to them all the time. They share a room and I have my own, thank god!  I hope things will start settling down!   

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: n
I am pretty up set that this is my second time on this assignment. the computer I did this on the first time disconnected the first time I did this exercise. I wish I had time to do it over yesterday but I had to study. studying is taking up alot of my time. more than I expected I would have to. I didn't know that college would be this tough. Oh' this is my favorite part of Scream. to bad that I have to keep writing. I really dig this assignment. I think it is pretty cool that the ten points is free. T he assignment isn't that  hard to do if you can find time. That is one thing that I wish I had more of. I wish that reading come a hell of alot easier than it does. I just wish that the first time would be enough. But for me it isn't. I wish that some times I was as smart as some people I know. the load of school is really beginning to weigh me down. I guess you guys will label that as stress. I always feel that I AM being constantly studied in psy. I always wonder what that would when I do a certain thing or think a certain thought. I really enjoy the class but I am way behind. I have a lot of reading to do in that class . I have alot of catching up to do. Especially in that class I am way behind on the chapters. I just want to have some time to do the things I want to do. I want to go an play basketball and lacrosse or just watch TV. I just want to relax and have fun . Studying sucks. It makes me sick and it never leaves my mind. Always know I should study but I don't. I am so lazy when it comes to doing the tings I have to. Man the moving is getting good but I don't want to tell my roommate to turn it off. I like it to o so I wouldn't to turn it off either. I sure do think this twenty minutes seems to be taking a long time. You think that it would go by quickly but not when you want to do something else. I am really excited about next week when I go to see Nate and Emily in Dallas and Memphis. I hope I CAN get a better car so I can make it. I am also excited about the football game this week when we sit on the 40 in row 5. That's sweet. I think this is taking so long. you guy's should make this 15 or 10 minutes long next time. too bad we couldn't do that for the other two due in December. I am two shy to ask the Prof. in class, maybe after class or before. He'll probably laugh in my face when I suggest it. The last four minutes are taking too damn long I just want to finish and do something else. I want to watch the movie and not study. Studying blows. I wish things were a hell of alot easier. the clock is going to slow. I am sick of writing. this is taking too long to finish. I want to do something else than this poop. the writing is getting very boring. there is another good part of the movie coming up. the movie is pretty good and I have to do this crap. there it went the best part and I missed it because of this crap. It may seem harsh but that is what I am thinking right now and that is what you asked for. yeah I done with this. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: y, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: y, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: n
Here I go. I keep thinking whether or not I am doing this right. I can't seem to spell anything right. I am going to correct all my spelling after I am done. This line just keeps on going. There was just a commercial with people that that said "I am in the woods" and it sounded like the other add that says "I am Tiger Woods". I am so glad the Cowboys won today. I am not even looking at the screen now, because I was losing my concentration. Only 5 minutes have gone by. I wonder when my roommate will get back. I still don�t know why my phone won't work. This line just keeps on going. It is a little bit hot in here. I am getting tired. I sure am glad I got this chair. I wonder how Jason is doing. I wonder bow many of my friends are in Rockwall now. I had a dream about Kim again last night. I wonder when I will see her next. I sure wish I could type better. Now it has been 10 minutes. When is Audra going to call. It is 10:30. Time sure does go by faster here. I need to think about all the  things I need to do tomorrow. But I don�t want to. It has almost been 15 minutes. I am anxious to mail my letters. I wonder if I have any mail. I just found food on my shirt. I wish I had something better to eat. I wonder  Oh there showing the tennis highlights now. I am glad that Agassi is doing better. I am noticing that I am writing "I wonder" a lot. It is starting to get harder to type now because I am getting tired. I think the twenty minutes are up. I am stopping now. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: n, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: n
I hate it when you get so confused and you don't know what to think about anything. Sometimes you think you are making the right decision but then you start to doubt yourself. I guess I tend to do that a lot lately. I never know if what I am doing is right or not. Will it work in the long run? Oh well. School gets to be confusing but I guess that is at least something  that is relatively constant. I don't think I deal that well with change. But I am not so sure anyone really does. Things tend to be uncertain a lot more that a lot of people like to  admit. The only thing that I know for sure is that no one person stays the same no matter how much they would like  things to. Personally, I have always thought that it is possible to care or even love more than one person at the same time. I am not sure why or when monogamous  relationships came around but I am not exactly sure they work. I actually have a lot of proof, just look at the divorce rate. But I guess that is not really proof of anything except for the fact that people have given up forgiving other people for their mistakes. Everything changes schools, and people and everything else. When you see people that you have known a long time in a different setting, why does everything seem so weird. Some of them seem nicer others have changed so much that you can't even recognize who they are. Anyway, I am really tired of thinking about this. Computers can really get so annoying. I realize that they are supposed to be a good thing but they can be really confusing too. I guess everything really is. I am getting really tired of talking to myself or at least that is how I feel I wonder what draws certain people to certain things. Like what makes me like  the color pink and someone else absolutely detest it?  My next question is  why do I put things off?  I guess because I don't like to admit to myself that I actually have work to do. Plus I guess I am just plain lazy. There's nothing like having a few really close friends but then that can be a bad thing too. But another problem is when you have a group of friends, and of course if there are guys and girls in the group as there normally one of them becomes attracted to another and of course that can become a huge problem. The worst thing is that if something does happen between those people then it will eventually seriously affect the  rest of the group. La La La!!! I feel so retarded right now and my time is up. So I guess this is goodbye. At least until I do my next righting assignment. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: y, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: y
My stream of consciousness is being disrupted by several things at this time. My computer has been giving me nothing but continual stress and troubles. First, my computer is a piece of crap. I called a guy to come hook everything up to it and he basically laughed and was unable to figure it out. Then the guy told me to take it to the campus computer store. I carried the entire, heavy hard drive to the store in the heat. While there, everyone I talked to laughed at me. I ate dinner alone, as I usually do since I have not made very many new friends. I have had no sleep because of how many classes I've had to take this semester because of credit hours and retouching courses. I am so stressed out. I just learned that my CDROM drive isn't working so I'm about to cry because now when I go home this weekend I have to convince my parents to fork over a bunch of money they don't have so my computer will be like everyone else�s'. My roommate�s Dad went through and installed everything one can possibly think of so she laughs at my computer problems which makes me feel worse. I miss my home and my dogs and my boyfriend and my friends so much that now I'm crying. All the stress I'm feeling is making me depressed and hungry and tired all the time. Gale, my roommate keeps me up really late at night and then wakes up at 6:30 to put on ALOT of makeup. She is so loud that I want to scream, but instead I keep my mouth shut because it feels like when I open my mouth to say things that might hurt peoples feelings or make them mad I end up losing the close relationship I had with them. So I guess I'm sort of keeping everything inside so that I don't lose any few friends that I made. It seems like everyone makes better grades than me here. I am so scared because I have so many questions about UT but nobody seems to know how to answer them. I knew that moving up here would be a big change, but I thought I could handle it. I know that once I adjust I will grow very strong and independent from this experience, but I feel that I may not be ready. I don't wear makeup for some reason that I have never been able to figure out. I always feel like I need improvement in something. Like with this essay, even though I know the length of it does not matter, I still feel it must be long to be acceptable. When I walk around to my classes I see so many people that they all look the same to me. It is so hot outside when I walk. I'm so thirsty right now that I am going to send this paper so I can get a drink. Then I'm going to call my mother and beg for a computer like everyone else has so I can feel like I fit in more. I won't get it so now I've got to prepare to use Gale's computer all year. My boyfriend is driving up here on Friday to spend the day with me at UT. I wish I had my own apartment so I could get some sleep. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: y, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: n