it was an awesome meal went to Chuys. the best chicken enchiladas I have ever had. my friend jay came to visit out of the clear blue. just showed up at my door today. I was pretty excited about seeing him. I really miss san Antonio. I miss my  family a lot. talked to my mom today. she says how much they all miss me there and how empty the house is without me. whatever. I'm the one in a claustrophobic dorm room living with a complete stranger. at least they still have each other. I'm the one on my own. don't get me wrong, I love the freedom of living on my own, it's just a little bit hard to make the transition at first. especially if you're as close to your family as I am. all of my really close friends are at a&m. that's weird. my two best friends from the first grade(we all used to live on the same street)go to school there and complain that they miss me. at least they are together. I have a lot of friends here and a lot of people I know(I never run out of things to do)but it just isn't the same. don't have that bond with other friends. oh, well. make new friends but keep the old. I met a really cool girl the other day. she's in my RTF class. man, that class is so huge 500 people!  I'm so worried about doing well in that class cause it's my major and I really want to make an a in there. the TA said that none of us would do as well as we think we will on the first test. great. that makes me feel good about it. it is really interesting, though. I hope I picked the right major, though. it's such a competitive field. I want to do really well. not just push a camera around for big stars for the rest of my life. I want to be one of the big stars. that would be a dream come true. wow. I don't even really know what I want to do with my degree yet. sometimes I think that that's cool and that I'm only 18 and I don't need to know all of that stuff just yet. then again, I'm in school and my parents are paying a lot of money for my education. I don't want to disappoint them and become one of those drifters who can't decide what they want to do until they have already been in college for like, ten years and by then they're too old to get a really awesome job anyway cause all the younger, smarter kids are getting them first. that would not be good. then I think, I'm dwelling on it entirely too much and I should just enjoy college, get the education I came here for and get on with my life. just sort of go with the flow. I don't normally stress out, but when I sit alone and actually think about it for a while, it all becomes sort of scary. you know, where I am in life. where I am going. where am I going?  that's the hard part(and it's sort of exciting)is not knowing the future. not knowing what is going to happen from day to day. we just take life as it comes. I have a class at nine in the morning . it is so freaking hard to wake up for that class every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I'm really proud of myself cause I haven't missed a single day of class yet. a lot of people I know have been skipping out. it's so easy to do. but not me. even when it was pouring rain outside, I still went to class. soaking wet. I'm so concerned about doing well. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: n, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: y