aimagic/big5essay huggingface dataset:
I just completed the pretesting survey. Sigh, things like that make absolutely no sense to me. I can never decide exactly where I stand, and I can never define myself with the choices provided. Always have to compromise who I am. I always end up generalizing all of those qualities I have fought tooth and nail to keep. Starting college has been such a weird experience. A room full of people, but I am still alone, a street full of people, but I am on my own, a world full of people, I have nobody but myself. I am glad the ball has started to roll. College is beginning, and, so far, there have been no horrid surprises, I have not been ambushed by a detail I have overlooked. I now have to gauge the speed of that ball, and plan my life around it. I need to visit my family this weekend. That is a drag, I am just beginning to form this new life, just starting to assemble my new identity, and I have to disassemble everything, and hide it in the closet. Family, sigh, the wonderful thing about family is you are sentenced to being around people who you probably will never get along with. Parents are even funnier. You are sentenced to respect and obey these people you probably will never get along with. I bet you are assuming I don't get along with my family, that we fight all the time. Right and wrong. I don't get along with my family, the key word is I. The person they think I am gets along with them perfectly. We haven't fought in 2 years, that was the last time I tried to be myself around them. Then I realized that I had to either bullshit them and survive, or go down in history. So here I am, Mr. Bullshit. Sigh. Sometimes I wonder where the bullshit ends and I begin. I stopped wondering about that a while ago. It was too hard to tell. I hate every person who is in my life right now. My roommates are ok, but immature. My girlfriend, that's right, girlfriends, are not compatible with me, but I am not willing to give up having sex, to be perfectly honest with them. At least not until I can find somebody I get along with, and can have sex with. I don't know why I place so much importance in sex, but that is all I can think of when I see a slightly attractive woman. I feel so evil sometimes, but I am sure my parents would be proud. I might be a depraved heathen, but at least they taught me how to bury myself under selfguilt. Good for them. This is the end of the twenty minutes; I need to go get my laundry out of the dryer now. Until next time. Ciao. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: y, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: y, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: y
People laugh at the same things over and over. There doesn't seem to be any diminishing of reward. No matter how long a joke has been around, no matter how old the recipient is; the same things seem to make people laugh. Why is that? Maybe it's because we like hearing the same stories over and over, associating them with our memories. Like "Star Wars". Nobody today looks at Star wars and says, "man, check out those models! No strings? How did they do that?" or, "Man, that Hark Hamill is a great actor!" But most of us can remember a time when we would have said that, so we just watch it over and over and over again. Nobody would do that with "Schindler's List". And the fact that Schindler is now IN Star Wars just mucks it all up. That's why everyone thinks Episode One sucks they're beyond the point where they want to see any more of that. The fact is that they're all fairly crappy, especially Return of the Jedi. Good god, was that awful! But people go back and say it was the best, because it reminds them of all the other crappy entertainment they were exposed to when they were kids. Come on, "Care Bears" was the most blatantly stupid piece of crap ever to grace the airwaves. Why did we ever like that in the first place? Well, it was the 80's nothing else was on. How did the end of the 80's manage to shift the entire culture of the world from pretense of high fashion to pretense of intelligence? Suddenly, everyone wanted to be knowledgeable about politics and science, or at least enough to talk about them, which was not at all. You barely need to know what the terms mean to debate something. I've seen "very intelligent" high school kids debate for hours on end without even knowing one of the issues. They bring in stuff that makes no sense to the argument, like the bible. What the heck does Isaih have to do with campaign finance reform? All the people in the bible lived under a sovereign government they didn't even have elections! There weren't even ideas at the time to compare to these, because the closest thing to democracy at the time was the Roman government, and we all know that the idea of reform was ludicrous to everyone but the people who got ripped off by the government. Since most of them got ripped off by being murdered, it's not like they can very well put forth a campaign. The Romans had a much cleaner system of getting rid of people they didn't like the only liability was that you had a fairly good chance of being knocked off by someone long before you reached the ripe old age of 35. Might as well have been anarchy, but then again, you need some semblance of order to keep people from panicking and having the whole thing fall apart. Of course, we know how well that strategy worked, considering the glory of the current Roman Empire. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: n, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: y
Today I skipped class for some reason. I don't know why I do these things. I know it is bad and I have nothing better to do, yet continuously I do this. What am I going to do with this major I have selected?. I don't even know if I what to stay in school. I want to work on my boat, and that is all. I need to finish the floors, fiberglass them. Add the carpet, insulate the cooler. Do all the engine work, hopefully the thing will run without incident. I need to buy coil wire, gas, carpet, foam padding, more fiberglass resin, collector gaskets, I already have the spark plugs. I hope nothing goes wrong because I accidentally hit the tab button and the web page backed up on me. If so when it happened I was five minutes into writing the paper. This keyboard is vastly uncomfortable and the next twelve minutes are going to suck. I am now typing with just one finger. I want Roy to bring his boat out this weekend. We could use my truck to put it in the water so I can look cool. That is of course if I fix the bastard. I wonder if someone reads this. What if I were to type a bunch of curse words. How would my grade change. Too bad I won't try this because my GPA sucks as it is right now, therefore I must be as courteous as possible. My hand now hurts extremely bad and I still have seven more minutes. Now I stood up to see if it helps my hands. It seems to work as long as I use the one finger method. I keep hitting the wrong buttons. I wonder if I could sue the professor for damage to my hands due to this project? Too bad the professor does not make jack for pay. I need to find a rich bastard to sue so I no longer have to attend school. If someone reads this I wonder if they think I am as sick as I really am. In case of technical difficulties my name is Steve Gernon. Not that a TA would have the brains, oops sorry about that. At this point there is one minute and I cannot wait. It's the best moment of my life. I can now leave this god awful position and get on with my life. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: y, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: n
It's been a long day and my head and body are tired. I think that my classes are going well but I feel a little worrisome due to the fact that I have not had a grade taken in any of them. I see people in school and wonder what they are thinking, and wonder why so many people are afraid. They seem scared to talk or to smile or even look up while they are walking this huge campus. With so many people around and the diversity being so big I feel they are missing out and are short changing the rest of their school by not being social. Lately, work keeps awake at night. I always feel as if I have things to do but do feel like doing them. I get upset that my teachers make us read so much. They need to be more hands on to get my attention. Also it seems as if school is not that big of a deal to my friends it bothers me because I don't like school either but I still have to do it. I guess this is what college is all about. The few that do take it seriously are the people that end up doing the best, at least I hope. But what happens to all the people that don't take it seriously. You always hear about those individuals that struck it rich because they didn't follow the norm. I wonder if I'm one of those people. I know that either way I'm lazy so I don't think I'll find out. I miss laura, I think of her a lot and I see her image in a lot of faces. I see curly hair and I imagine her walking, or if I see her figure on a girl I look up to see the face but its' not her. I wish she was here for at least a second. just that one touch of her hand made things better. She always made me laugh and happy. I think I did the same for her, but I still wish she was here with me. love is weird. I think love is something that everybody has with one another and with some it's even stronger. And that strong love is what causes the weird stuff like marriage and so forth. But I wish people would only say love when they meant it. It's used so frequently that now it doesn't have the same affect as it used to. but oh well who really cares. I think laura was the one person who understood what love meant to me, her and my mom both knew. But everybody else thinks I'm weird. Why is a relationship bad to have even if it is long distance isn't that relationship better than not having one at all. I feel that if you really care distance can't stop what the heart feels even if you can't see, touch or hear them. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: y, Neuroticism: n, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: n
Somehow I just submitted an blank assignment so hopefully this one will submit when it is completed. I should be studying for my first astronomy test right now. Somehow I managed to put it off until the last minute like I did with this writing assignment. I need to break this procrastination problem before I get any further into the semester. I have this problem every fall that I have been in college. In spring I am fine I get everything done ahead of time. I am sure it has nothing to do with fall or spring. I am hoping this fall my grades will be awesome but it is hard adjusting to a new environment. I just transferred to UT after 2 years at the University of North Texas. I have been living here now for almost three weeks. I feel like I'm on vacation or something. While I miss my old apartment and friends, I am very happy to be here at UT. I couldn't get in to UT directly after high school because of my class rank. I didn't really concern myself with school in high school. Suddenly when I started at UNT academics became more important to me and my grades improved. I applied to UT expecting to not get accepted because I had heard horror stories of how hard it is to transfer in. It came as a complete surprise when my parents called and told me I got a letter of acceptance. I instantly decided that I was ready for the move. It never really hit me that I was leaving my friends behind in Denton until now. I think I offended one of my closest friends in Denton because I was so excited about moving and didn't really seem to care that I was leaving. Suddenly two weeks before I moved she decided irrationally that she never wanted to speak to me again. Oh well. I love Austin. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: n, Agreeableness: y, Conscientiousness: n, Openness: n
Right now at this moment I am feeling a little anxiety. I tell myself that this is normal, being a first year student I should feel this way. But the thought does not comfort me. For some reason I feel I am the only one who is going through this right now. I don't feel anxiety all the time though, when I run into friends or go to class it all disappears. My only explanation is that I am comfortable with routine. I hate routine. There is nothing exciting about it, it's just boring. There's no risk in routine or adventure, only security. Maybe that's why I feel so much better when I have work to do or a class to catch. I hope I grow out of this and become more relaxed. The way I see it is that the only way I'm ever going to grow out of this is to get use to the different lifestyle by gaining confidence over time. You can only gain courage towards something as you do it. All I have to do is get over that first hurdle, just do it and not think about the situation for too long. That's my problem; I worry about the future way too much. Worrying is a waste of time and I know that from experience. Half the things I have worried about here at school have turned out to be nothing. But for some reason I still worry, I worry a lot. I have noticed that nothing ever turns out the way you plan in your head. So if I plan on worrying, why do I actually worry? I know there's a good chance it won't happen because I thought of it. I will never enjoy life like this. If this keeps up I'm going to have a problem. I want to go out into the world and totally change something. But I know for sure that won't happen if I don't grow up!. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: y, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: y
I'm pretty stressed out right now, I just have to get this paper out of the way so I can start on my other 615 hours of homework. What is going through my mind right now, hmmm I haven't called home enough. I've skipped Biology too many times, but I still need an A. I think the teacher is throwing way too much at us for this to only be a 2 hour class. I can get through it though. What is going on in my mind right now?? Actually, I'm thinking I need to think of something interesting to write about so the person who has to read all these doesn't slip into a coma and die. I have a date tomorrow night with a girl that I hardly know, but she was cute enough I don't know what I think about this date thing every weekend, it is getting very old way too fast. How is that supposed to help me adapt to college life. A date is not necessary for every single event, especially when I am dressed up as Country Club Ken (by choice of course). I just heard from someone that this socalled hot date I have has some personal issues. What is that supposed to mean? No one would go into detail, just that she had issues. She could be a bulimic head case for all I know or it could be something simple like she is very into herself. I have a friend who always says that about someone else, but they couldn't describe it. I'm worried about my roommate. He acts strait but every once in a while I catch him staring at me when I get out of the shower. Now that I think about it, it is extremely hard to write about my constant thoughts, because you have to put effort into typing it out, you cannot just think. In class, that is when I can think continuously without interruption, the things that go through my mind in one hour of lecture can begin with some girl I saw looking at me and end up with my thoughts about my first exam next week. There is one good looking girl on my floor that I keep going back to, I winder if she has issues as well. I have been to her room a couple of times, but I can't decide if it could happen or not, I do not like to go for things unless I am absolutely positive she will say yes. Maybe I think about girls too much, but I am a college freshman boy and what else do we think about besides school occasionally and my lack of money by the second week of the month. How in the world does that always happen to me once I get on my own, I could always manage money at home, but the day I moved up here it just disappeared and now I am already left with hardly nothing. People always told me that, but I never listened. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: y, Neuroticism: n, Agreeableness: y, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: y
I guess the way I feel right now is overwhelmed. I just came back from a class of 540 students, which is double the number of kids in my whole graduating class. Although there are many students here who are so excited to be away from home and all on their own I wouldn't mind going back home and staying their for a while. I am very pleased with my life at home and this sudden change has left me to start all over. Although I know this is a part of life I feel as thought I am losing some of my childhood friends yet no one is replacing them. At first I told myself that is just how I feel and if those childhood friends felt the same then I might be right but this whole summer all of my high school friends were ready to leave for college. Now that we are all separated we understand how much we depended on each other. I have been here three days and everyday for at least an hour I have talked to my friend back home. I guess what scares me the most is that when you meet someone here you have no idea where they came from, where they have been, or what type of person they are. Back at home we all knew each others families, knew what type of person they where etc. I can truly same that moving to Austin has definitely made me reevaluate myself. Not to be cocky but back at home everyone knew who I was and what type of person I was, but here everyone thinks I am a nobody. I feel as thought I have to impress someone for him or her to approach me where at home others approached me. I guess the comfort of home was my stability and now that I am here I have to build a new foundation to start from. I am very great full that there is one other person from my school here because we are together all the time and it makes this transition just a bit easier. Now that we have started classes I am trying to busy myself with my work, which is, a good thing and then it seem as thought time goes by a lot faster. I think I just have to mental got myself ready for this semester and then I will be fine. I do like challenges and that is why I came to this university but the challenges I expected are not the ones I am having trouble adjusting too. It is completely different aspects of college life that has thrown me off. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: y, Neuroticism: n, Agreeableness: n, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: n
This assignment seemed so easy at first, but now that I am actually writing it, it is hard to find something to write about. I thought that would spend a little time telling you about my first few days at The University of Texas. I come from a very small town, and all my life I have dreamed of living in a very big city. So around my junior year in high school I began looking at different schools and one of them happen to be here. Well I have been to Austin before, but I never got to really go on campus. As I stood on the south mall and saw the capital, I knew this was the place for me. I had a big city and a big school all rolled into one. As the big day got closer and closer, I began to chicken out. I didn't want to leave home, but most of all, I didn't want to leave my family. I wasn't for sure that I could move six hours away not knowing one single person. Everyone told me that I would never make it on my own because I was too much of a "mommy's girl. " This is when I knew that it was time to grow up and take another big step in my life. The "moving day" finally arrived and I was scared, but very excited. I decided to go through rush. I needed some kind of activity to keep me busy and this was perfect. My family got me settled in and two days later they were gone. I was very surprised that I didn't shed a tear that day, and two weeks later I still haven't looked back. I haven't even been homesick yet. My roommate is having a hard time, though. We didn't get along at first, but I think everything will work out fine. She calls home a lot crying, and sometimes that is kind of hard on me, but I hope to help her through this tough time. Other than a few small bumps in my road, I am having the time of my life. I will admit all of this is a huge change for me, but sometimes change is just what a person needs. Somehow, everything has just fallen in place for me, and I hope it will remain this good for the next 4 years. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: y, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: n
I am residing at Castillian for my freshman year. I have my own personal room, which is more than I can say for others. It is very nicely furnished with all of my personal possessions from home. The entire back wall is a large window with a beautiful view of the hills. All the lights can be seen twinkling, which causes a serene atmosphere and a pleasant way to relax. My parents are paying a small fortune for my to stay here as well as for all of the other things I'd like to do. They try so hard to make me happy, but I'm not. I feel a sense of debt to them to succeed in college. I also believe that this was their full intention. We'll call it a bribe. They spit out money as long as I do well. This shouldn't be a problem for me considering grades have always been important to me, and I myself would like to succeed as best I can. The bribe, however, is the problem. I'm cracking, although that term doesn't quite seem to fit my feelings. Dissolving in a container of sulfur dioxide seems to better fit the description. Everything engulfs you at once and slowly eats you away. Your struck with shock and you can no longer feel the pain. You can always try and get out, but since you are dissolving, everything you aim for slips through your fingertips. I have studied numerous hours to ensure myself the proper background for each of my subjects. I go to every discussion session and can explain anything that has been taught in class or the first chapter of each book. When it actually comes to turning something in, however, minute mistakes always seem to add up. Already after the first day of class, I have messed up terribly on homework. I am incredibly stressed out and seeing the results of this assignment (though it's not for a grade nor does the professor use it for anything) made me more miserable. In fact, it actually brought me to tears. An assignment that means nothing to anyone (except obviously me) brought me to a ranting rage and then tears. I see myself as pathetic because I failed myself and because I can crack so easily. I can't say that my classes are overwhelming, though they take up from 9  7 with a one hour lunch break each day. If I had to guess, I would say that I was unsure of everything. I'm unsure of friends, family, boyfriend, classes, grades, time, money, and so much more. On top of this, I'm left for the first time in my life to attempt at juggling all of these things around at once. I'm sure it will all level out in the end and that I'll eventually get the swing of things. As of now, however, I feel like a mere speck amongst better people who are sure of so many things. I only wish I wasn't born with the disease of being manic depressive (and that my grandmother in France hadn't died last week). It only seems to complicate things. Also, as we said in class, stress can bring about depression and visaversa. Perhaps that is playing a slight role in my emotions. All I know is that it seems so much right now. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: n, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: y, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: n