As I sit here, I wonder what I got myself into. I came from a school of 300 people. I graduated with a senior class of 76. The University is such a huge place, I wonder if I'm going to fit in, or should I say, make my self conscious of my surroundings. It's not that I don't like my classes that I have now, or that they are already becoming a problem, but I wonder what the future holds. My birthday is today, and I am finally 18. It seems like it took forever for me to get to this point. But now that I finally made it, it's no different. My mom called this morning to wish me a Happy Birthday, and she sounded kind of sad. Her little baby girl is now 18. She asked my why it went by so quickly, but looking back, it took forever. My grandparents also called this morning. They live across the street from my old house, and I was continuously over there visiting them. She told me that she still thinks that I'm going to come through that door and ask her what's for dinner. She says it's like I'm gone for the weekend, but I'll return soon. And my grandpa, well, he's my favorite. Every time I look at him, I see all of his hard work and strength that he has put into his life. Raising 8 kids is no easy job. The day after their 50th wedding anniversary, everybody attended mass, almost all 27 grandchildren, 16 sons and daughters, and a couple of greatgrandchildren. I was going to read for the mass. I went up to the podium and I looked out there at all of my family and then looked at my grandpa. I was so proud to be a part of that. I was thankful that God allowed me to be there and have that feeling. And now when I talk to him on the phone, I get that feeling all over again. I miss him dearly. Sometimes I think more than I miss my mom or my brother. Now, my step dad, I don't miss him at all. Sometimes I look back, and I don't know how I put up with him so long. He is so evil and cruel, at least he was or is to me. He married my mom when I was 6 years old. I didn't know him that well; my mom always made me go outside and play when he came over. He was just a total control freak. Nobody in my mom's family likes him because of all the pain he's caused me over the years. From getting in my face and just yelling at me for no apparent reason, to slapping me across the face because my mom and I had gotten into a name calling fight. He's a dick, that's all there is to it. I never brought friends over to spend the night; I never wanted any guys to come over to see me. My escape place was at my grandparent's house. I would tell my dad about all the shit he was putting me through, but there was nothing he could do about it. All he would tell me was that I could come up there and live with him any time I wanted to. On weekends I was hardly home, I was usually spending the night at Holly's house, she is my best friend. Now that I'm at college, I don't have to put up with him anymore. I don't plan on coming home anytime soon. My mom and brother can come up here if they want to see me. Talking about what comes to mind is difficult. I feel that I have burdened you with all of my family problems. Don't feel sorry for me, I don't. Life is just a difficult thing to deal with sometimes. 

Big Five personality labels — Extraversion: y, Neuroticism: y, Agreeableness: y, Conscientiousness: y, Openness: n