Today my aunt Caroline came up to visit me. she was on a trip out here for business meetings. She told me a bunch of stories about her life at UT when she went here 25 years ago. she told that she was almost raped by a serial rapist the police had been trying to catch for two years. He had been stalking her for weeks, and she never even knew. the only other person I knew who this had happened to is a friend of mine who had an abusive boyfriend who would rape her on a daily basis. she's finally doing a lot better, but still has kind of a loser boyfriend. guys are just weird that way. I've been going out with the same guy for close to two and a half years now, and it looks like we might get married!  I'm really excited about that, we've had lots of plans about various things, but I don't know. we want a house and kids and that whole thing. today in art class, one lady had a quilt as her piece to express an emotion and it really brought me that sense of home. It was so pretty, it had a floral design, but also had these powder green and white solid pieces. It really made me feel at home and almost at my grandma's house. she's got a quilt her mother made, and it is about seventy years old. It was made from material of old clothes that no one fit into anymore. Their family was so incredibly poor that they lived out in the countryside, and worked in the fields. my grandmother has told stories of her life, some gruesome and some amazing. she used to be the one to cut off the heads of the chickens they ate, and it was nothing to her just normal. other times she can remember riding through the country side on her horse where there are now huge freeways and shopping centers. I often wonder what it would be like living back then. she gave me a magazine clipping of how life was like as a teacher back then (she was a teacher, and I am going to be a teacher) and Im am really glad that we are well on our way into the twenty first century!  they used to not be able to be married, have children, they had to go to church every Sunday, clean the classroom at least once a week on their hands and knees with a hand brush, and all these other gruesome things. the only thing I have to worry about are the guns and cuts that go on in the schools (maybe it would be better to go back to the old days, huh?)  I want to be an art teacher, but Im not sure how that will all work out. my major will allow me to be an artist but with an all-level teaching certificate on the side. so. I can either be a starving artist or a starving teacher!  (both kind of sad)  however, I don't really want to have to be out there working, Im more of a homebody, and want to be the typical housewife. everyone I know thinks Im crazy, but that has been my goal (perhaps "dream" is too strong a word) ever since I can remember. I have also wanted five children since the time I was about eight years old. I actually come from a family of four children, so maybe the fifth I want is an unconscious way of somehow "outdoing" my parents. that has often worried me because it's kind of what it sounds like, but I really don't feel that way. my parents were actually the ones who first brought it up, so I don't know.