ahs10/essays-big5 huggingface dataset:
hmmm. I was wondering what I was going to think when I was planning to do the assignment. well, I can hear that tv. married with children. I thought they were off the air. this place feels a little cold. its friday what am I going to do today?   sharon's or cullens place for sure. maybe downtown. hmmm. I have a paper to write my monday. I might want to get some sleep tonight and get a good start on it sat. its only two pages though. I better do a good job though. I have to read un redeemed captive this week to. I better thry and finish it sunday. I'm getting hungry. mexican food. taco C. hmmm. I might take a nap today. I want to work out today. I want to gain 10lbs before christmas. I need to work on my jump shot too. I miss playing ball everyday like I used to growing up. I'll go out to eat with eva at the texas club tonight then go play ball followed by working out. after that I'll be free for the rest of the night and be ready to party. I need to run a couple of miles to. I wondering how often you have to run in order to loose body fat. I wonder how long it would take me to get to 6%. 6 months? I'd have to eat right though. I wonder what it would take to walk on the Ut men's b-ball team. I guess I'd have to email someone and ask permission to play on the practice squad and go from there. hmmm. that would be great to work my way up there. if Drew could do it then I could do it . huge maybe but I'd have to commit myself. kinda like when I grew up playing everyday. I like this root beer. A&W never fails to make great drinks. Amys ice cream sounds good too. I wonder what my room mates are doing tonight. sean is probably staying home and doing nothing and cullen might be getting together with some of his friends from back in high school. I want to go to killeen this weekend but I have way to much work to knock out. I miss my lil brother jacob and sis caroline. I'll drive up there to see them as soon as possible. I wonder how my uncle joe is doing. I can't believe that him and emily are getting a divorce. they're only 30 and they have been married for 5 yrs and they seem right for each other. just goes to show what can happen to two people. you never know . dang that really bites because I hate to see my family break up. reminds me of my parents. and my dad. I wonder when the new lutheran service is. I need to get back into going to church. I belong there and I haven't found a church perfect for me in atx yet. I liked hyde baptist collegiate service. I'm not baptist though. anyways. I can't believe I'm going to be 21 in like 3 months. its more of a right of passage then anything. I still won't drink in public so its not that big of a deal but I always imagined 21 being in your 20s and a legal adult. I don't feel 21 though. that always seemed old to me. I don't think I have much time left on the writing assignment. hmmm. shrimp at the clubhouse tonight! I think I'm going to take  eva up on her offer and go with her and her family.
I was writing a previous paragraph when this computer accident submitted my paper. I was not finished as you probably might have seen. I will continue from here on. As I sit here and try to do this assignment, many things come to my mind. One is all my homework assignments that are due for my other classes. I have spent all day doing chapter readings for other classes and now, though still behind in some classes, feel a little better that I actually made myself read for those classes. At this particular moment I feel very hungry for I have only eaten once today and it was at 2:00pm. It is currently 9:30pm. I do not know how long this paper has to be but when asked to write my thoughts down as soon as they come into my head, my mind goes blank and remains blank for a while. My mind is still held up on the homework assignments that are due for tomorrow. It's been 10 minutes into this assignment so I'm glad I only have to do this for 10 more minutes. Yesterday's lecture just came into mind. I love neurology so I thought it was the best lecture I have heard in a while. There's something about the brain that makes me want to make that field my career. It is a mysterious organ that we are just starting to unravel. I thinks its the challenge that we face in trying to fully understand it that makes me want to become a neurologist. Well surprisingly its been 20 minutes already and I have lots more work to do.
Well, I'm sitting here writing this. Not much is going on right now. I was playing free cell on my computer before. Yeah, I was that bored. Wow, this is what college is like. My roommate is sleeping right now. That's all she ever really does. Sleep and eat. speaking of eating I'm kinda hungry even though I had boba tea and a spring roll like at about 11. I really need to stop these late night temptations! yeah I really don't want to gain the freshman 15 as they call it. I want to go home this weekend but I really shouldn't. I have a lot of crap to study for. I want to go home to see my grandma and my dog. I'm not using very good grammar or punctuation in this assignment. I hope whoever reads it does not think I'm a complete moron I'm just lazy! yeah my laziness often gets in the way of things oh well. that is life. now I'm not thinking about anything much. I wonder if we are going to have one of those random pop quizzes in bio tomorrow. I hope not. I didn't do much today partially because I went to eckards to buy myself some cold medicine and orange juice!  I believe in my vitamins. hhahaha ok no!  that was retarded. I think I'm getting sick. ARRGH  I hate getting sick because it always lasts for a while and now I can't miss classes. damn college. I don't know how people who miss class do it. I would always be scared that there would be some sort of pop quiz or the professor going over some random things that will be on a test. like I say GRR to college. I kinda miss high school now that I'm not there. I hate the way time just moves on and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it. I was thinking about that today and there isn't much time till I'm 20! only like 2 years. I never imagined myself even being 18. I guess I don't realize how much I have really changed. Not many people realize whenever they change kinda like you don't really realize whenever u change physically. Grr sorry. I accidentally pressed the finish key but I was not finished since there were like 6 minutes still left so I'm going to continue blabbing for 6 minutes. its only fair. I really do wonder what the hell my life is going to be like in 10 years. It seems that then everything is going to change. Coming out of high school whenever I think about it not much has changed. well the people that I see have changed and my surrounding has changed a bit but I still talk to my best friends. My room mate has been my friend since middle school. I hope that living together won't interfere with our friendship since everyone has those horror stories where they shared a dorm room with their best friend and then they become enemies. I don't think that will happen to us. at least I really hope not. I really do hope that I will soon get over him. this is kinda random but I think about him a lot. I don't even know what is so great about him. nothing really. I guess I still like the person he used to be. USED TO BE is the key word. oh well. I will get over him. Anyways. my continued 6 minutes are about to be up. I hope my blabering was not too stupid and mindless. Oh well! bye bye
I just got out of psychology class like an hour ago so I thought I would do this paper while I am still in the thinking mode. I thought what pennebaker said about how students new to the college experience, like myself are under lots of stress. that is true. and how they are more prone to get sick when they go home because their stress is relieved. but I think I am sick right now because I've been coughing a lot and my nose is all clogged up. I think it's from the air conditioning in my dorm. but I'm not supposed to be sick now, right? anyways I've been here in austin for almost three weeks now and I have had lots of new experiences but I am beginning to get homesick. I miss my mom, dad, and sisters, and the city of houston. I am glad that I have friends from high school here that I can lean on. just ate dinner. it was really good and now I'm really full. my dance class starts tomorrow, can't wait for that. I don't like sleeping on the top bunk, don't sleep very well, been taking lots of naps. probably cause I stay up too late and have to get up early. lots of traffic noises outside. can hear buses. reminds me of when I got on the completely wrong bus the first week of school. I met a guy and have been hanging out with him. he seems really cool. I want to us to be friends but scared he might want to be more than friends. just adds to all the stress. I really need to be at the library studying right now. I think I will go when I finish this. just learned how to play racquet ball the other day. it's really fun, but very exhausting. I am so sore. also my legs hurt from walking around campus so much. I am really out of shape. everybody is concerned about the freshman fifteen but I really don't care if I gain fifteen pounds. it is highly unlikely since I eat like a bird, but I would be okay with the extra weight. I'm not going home until the end of september which means I will be going five weeks without seeing my family. I've never gone for more than a week without seeing them. can't wait to go home and see them and go to a pat green concert in houston. seems like not many people here listen to country music which is mostly what I listen to, although I do like other kinds of music. my twenty minutes is up. got to go!
Stream of consciousness I have had a very rough week this week. I never dreamed that I would be so busy at college with classes and fraternity engagements; at least not on the weeknights. I feel that the sleep depravation may begin to catch up with me. Perhaps as time passes I will learn how to better manage my time on campus. It does not help that I have little, hour long breaks inbetween all of my classes, and I guess I should use that time to study, maybe outside the Student Union or the FAC building. We had a gentleman from the Learning Center come by the fraternity house and scare me by speaking about high school students whom have come to the university with straight A's and left with D's because they did not know how to study, for this I am a prime candidate. I never studied in high school save for calculus. At least I will not have trouble with Writing papers, as I am quite affluent with the subject. I write a lot in my English class, which is taught by a disorganized hippie. He is a nice man but is very difficult to gauge. This professor also has a very ludicrous way of assessing grades; he uses something called the Online Learning Record. I have yet to figure the whole thing out but it seems to me, that it is a totally fallacious way of determining a student's progress through his own introspection. I guess I am a product of conventional thinking and teaching; maybe the class will be good for me. I feel, at least overall, that my classes are very well taught with the one exception. I have, however, heard that my psychology professor gives very difficult tests, but I am a very good test taker, we'll see. My only real concern so far is time management and maintaining a decent level of sleep, which I have yet to achieve so far. I guess I need to skip a few social events and get some rest, though I have met a very nice girl already whom I like very much; I recently asked her to O. U. weekend and she politely accepted. Hopefully, our relationship will not crumble between now and the time of the game. There is another girl who I feel bad about not asking, though I imagine that she will find another date. We where seeing each other quite a bit before I met the other, though I am sure she does not care as much as I am probably pretending she is. I guess that this is enough, and would like to close by stating that the first two weeks have absolutely flown by, and I am hopeful that my grades will remain high throughout the semester.
I really want to go swimming but I don't want to tell Sylvia that I don't want to see her dumb brother play in that stupid baseball game. I really want to go home this weekend. I know for a fact that my mom would never let me go well maybe she would let me go out with Gera even after I haven't seen her for a while. Maybe I just don't want to go out with him I think that I feel guilty for some strange reason and I can't get the courage to tell Gera. This air conditioner is really bothering me. It makes so much noise and does not cool very much. I am so hungry. My roommate sucks. I don't know why I'm so mean. Maybe I'm just not used to someone always wanting to know everything I do. Maybe she's just too smart and I feel stupid. I'm really hungry. I don't know how I'm going to get to eat if I go with Sylvia and Loni. I wonder if Gera is calling me right at this moment. I wonder how come his dad didn't say goodbye before hanging up. I think I'm  making too much noise typing. I get the feeling that I'm disturbing everyone behind me. I can't believe Loni. She just met this guy today and she already has him in her room. I wonder if her parents know the way she is. I still have one more question to do for Economics and I don't really feel like reading. I learned that I should wait to be told what to read before I stress That stress test Sylvia and I took was weird. I think that man thought that my life was pretty boring. I bet he thought I was weird. He could right away tell what was bothering Sylvia. I know that Manny really has Sylvia thinking about him day and night. He's such a jerk. I can't believe what How could someone treat someone that way. Maybe love is blind. I wonder why people around here are so free. I can't believe that girl I say two days ago. She was wearing next to nothing and felt no shame. I assume she must have felt fresh or something but doesn't she have one bit of self respect for herself. I wonder why the lady behind me just apologized to the girl. I had to turn around for a second. I think that I'm a nosy person. I often catch myself eavesdropping on other people's conversations. During lunch today I listened to two complete conversations. I could not believe the things that people talk about. Why does my roommate have to be so selfish. I think that I want to make everyone healthy. I don't know why but I am so self conscience of the way I look. But I hear that is actually average in girls my age. I went all out on this diet until I lost up to 25 pounds and now I think that I am too skinny. but I say this girl today that was a bit over weight and she was beautiful, then why do I gross myself out when I see my roommate eating horrible and then I see her change and I feel that I have to go workout. She gets offended very easily. I don't even tell her anything about her weight or anything related to that subject anyway and she jumps up and becomes aggravated very quickly.
Here I go, frist off let me think of a topic, how about looking at a country side in the Texas hill conutry. Useraly the frist thing I notce are the ceder trees, and while I like trees, there is something upsetting about ceder trees; they are not native to this part of the country, however they are well adattined to this climet. Sence ceder trees are evergeens they can feed themselfs all year round, which gives them avantivce over the trees that grow here naturaly, such as oaks and jupaters. Oaks and jupaters lost thier leaves in the fall, and both species of trees grow very slowly; aposed to ceder wich grow very fast. Thus the ceder trees have drowed out most of the oak and other native trees. This is upsetting to me because, while ceder forest is nice to look at, it is no where as impressive as an forest made up of old mujestic oaks and jupaters with there beatifull puple and white blossmues. Another thing about ceder is they grow close together and low to the ground, which makes it very hard to walk around in a ceder woolden area. Just think how great it would be to walk aroud in a forest of huge old oak trees over your head, that pervade shade, while still leting a cool wind througt. Yes, it would cerncely make the rolling hills of the hill conutry more beatuifull, and would surely enhace my beatitude, while walking through the woolds.
I'm so tired both physically and mentally. I just want sleep, sleep, sleep. I'm so overwhelmed with everything and I can't seem to think of anything but my future. I focus more on how my life might be in the future than how my life is presently. I just feel that it's going to take forever to get where I want to be in life. I don't know why I bother with the future when I have so many things to overcome right now. I just wish I knew how it felt to be completely satisfied. Although, I don't think that is possibleto be completely satisfied. It would make my life seemingly unnatural. What is natural to me are headaches. They are a natural result of stress; stress that is the result of my acknowledgment of my shortcomings. I just want to be truly content with myself and with my life one day. I don't know if that is possible, but I'd like to think so.
As I'm sitting here at my computer I'm thinking about how bad I started off this semester. I know that I should have handled my financial aid situation a lot earlier. Plus not to mention a class of mine got cancelled which threw off my whole my whole schedule. Causing not only a first week of overcrowded bookstores and no parking, but also one of unnecessary involvement in the mass confusion of adding and dropping courses. I'm also thinking how tired I am from staying up all night studying. In the back of my mind I'm hoping to get this work study job so that I can be independent and have money but something keeps telling me it may be too much for me to work and try to stay focused on school, considering how I took 12 hours and worked this summer. I keep smelling my cologne (CK1) that I accidentally poured on my clothes this mourning. A lot more came out then I expected and it has a distinct and very strong smell that overlaps anything else. Had I not been so tired maybe I would have realized that I only needed a couple of drops. Not to mention everywhere I have went today people either say, someone put on to much cologne, or , you smell good. I 'm looking at this clock above the page trying to pace my thoughts and time. I'm also looking at the clock in my room trying to set a schedule for my self that will allow me to do all assignments and class work in a good timely manner. My brain feels cluttered with many thoughts of how much work I need to do. I'm homesick already. I miss my family and I have only been here a couple of weeks. I didn't expect this my sophomore year. I thought it only happened to freshmen. I feel really hungry too. I haven't ate all day unless you call a frappachino from starbucks as a energizer a meal. I feel pain in my knee from over playing yesterday at Gregory. I'm hoping to get a chance to play on the the basketball team. But with my luck they won't have tryouts for the second year in a row. I wonder how all my high school buddies are doing in there schools and colleges. I wonder if they found the transition from high school to college as hard as I did. Probably not because they all play sports. I think if you play sports it makes you work harder because you know if you don't you won't play. I think a lot of people have a misconception of college athletes. they think they have it easy and that they get free grades. They don't. They have a job. there coaches expect them to be robots that never get tired. While fighting through the daily soreness and injuries, they have to try to get school work done. I think that is tough. I have sympathy for them. I hope that I can get everything done today that needs to be done and also I plan on changing my shirt before this CK1 gives me a headache. I probably will never wear CK1 again. I hope all my friends and family are doing well. I plan to get some good sleep tonight also, of course after all my work is done. time is running out so bye.
Ok well here I am sitting in my dorm room trying to finish this assignment. Earlier today I had called the student financial aid services because all of my financial aid hasn't come through yet. But now they said it should be getting here anytime soon. And one more thing I still need to do is go get a book for my government class because earlier in the week, they had said that it had been ordered although it wasn't there yet. So I'm probably going to have to go later on today. Then my roommate is going to the football game tomorrow morning. I still don't have a sports package and I didn't buy a ticket so this time I won't be seeing the game. I have a paper due for government on monday concerning my political views and where I come from and who or what has influenced me to think that way. I'm still unsure as to what exactly I will be saying. I just have a couple of ideas written down in a piece of paper. Oh man, yesterday some friends and I went to go work out and for some reason my legs are kind of sore right now. We're probably going again today, but who knows. I'm starting to get a little hungry now, I ate breakfast this morning but I'm getting hungry again. Oh I almost forgot, today is my friend's birthday, I need to call him after I finish this assignment. He is back at my hometown, El Paso, but I'm still calling him to wish him a happy birthday. For some strange reason our room always gets real cold. And then our neighbors have the little thing to control the air conditioner but supposedly they can't move it unless we fill in some sort of request. And then other people down the hall complain that it's too hot in their room. I don't know but whatever. My board here in the room looks kinda plain right now. I was initially going to put up some posters a while back, but I ended up doing other stuff and then I would get lazy, so till now the board still looks bare. All I have is one poster on one of the walls here to my right. And then the curtains we put up kept falling at the beginning but we finally got them to stay. All I need now is to actually get the other pictures I wanted to put up already. Oh and then there's my calendar on the wall too, but that's about it. I'm definitely going to finish that this weekend. Last night our neighbors were making a lot of noise and I just couldn't fall asleep. Soon enough I did though. And then I had to wake up early because I have an eight o' clock class, but I managed to do it. So now I'm just here waiting for my roommate to get back from work because we need to go to the store and I need to get a book. Then she said she wanted to buy some jersey for the game on saturday. While I'll be sleeping in, she will be at the game. she can later tell me how the game went, because last time it was raining, hopefully it won't rain again. Now I'm a bit thirsty, I think I'm going to go get myself something to drink from downstairs. Ok that was all for my 20 minutes. finished.