Right now I'm feeling relieved that I was able to get here  the last couple of times I tried to get to this site the computer told me the site was unavailable. Very frustrating! I like this assignment, although I'm not sure why 20 minutes are necessary; it seems to me that 10 or even 5 minutes would do. I'm really not sure what to write next  I haven't done this kind of thing since seventh grade, when I was home schooled. It's weird how your mind goes blank sometimes. I still don't know what to write. My thoughts are mostly involved with UT, with classes and so forth. I like them, in general, but only one has been intellectually stimulating so far (no, I am not going to tell you which one!) I have great hopes for the rest, though  sometimes it takes a while for a class to get into gear. Don't know what to write. Don't know what to write. Feeling frustrated, I guess. I was afraid I wouldn't think of anything to write. It's not that I have a sluggish or inactive mind  quite the opposite, actually. It's just that sometimes I don't do well when I have to write it down. Which is strange, because I love to write. I keep a journal (which you, Prof. Pennebaker, would probably find interesting) and enjoy writing in it my gripes, hopes, fears, joys and other important stuff. Maybe I'm just not good at this kind of structured work. I'm lefthanded, Prof. P  does that have anything to do with it? I have a vivid imagination, and am inclined to daydream. Hey I just remembered, you said these were confidential. I can write anything I want! I don't feel any freer with that in mind, however. I'm stuck again. Still stuck. I wonder how many of my fellow classmates have the same trouble I do with this. Stuck. Now I'm thinking of the guy I like. (I'm not going to give his name, because I'm serious about him, and I'm not sure just exactly how confidential this really is. ) I wonder if you actually read any of these, just to see what kind of people are in your class. I know that if you really picked my brain you'd have some interesting stuff (interesting in a good way, of course!) This is a tumultuous and crazy time in my life, although most people would think it tame. My beliefs are undergoing an overhaul, and everything seems to be up in the air. That's not a good feeling, but it's never dull! I think in the last few months I've learned a lot about prejudice and tolerance, and I'm glad I'm learning what I am, even if it destroys my plans for perfect happiness (sarcasm there). What kind of a world is it where people who search for truth risk having everything they want taken away? This can't be right. But it's true, and there's no denying it. This makes me feel apprehensive and sad. I feel some anger at the world, and at God too. (Yes, Prof. Pennebaker, I believe there is a God!) But real religion requires immense amounts of faith, and I have to trust that everything will end up ok. Now I feel slightly reassured. If only everything weren't so uncertain! But do I really want a world where you know exactly what's going to happen next? What if you knew when bad things were going to happen, but were powerless to prevent any of them, because everything was predestined? It's possible that everything IS predestined, but that we don't know about it. Maybe you don't admit that as a possibility, Prof. P, but I do. Anyhow, I would much rather not know what's going to happen next in most cases. But in some, like who I'm going to marry, I can barely contain my curiosity. I guess that's due to a lack of satisfying relationships in my life, that I so strongly feel the need for another one. But whatever happens, I refuse to worry  if everything's predestined, I can't change it anyway, and if it is, then I can still change things for the better.