ahs10/essays-big5 huggingface dataset:
Yesterday in class we talked about what different parts of the brain are in control with. One interesting part to me is the Occipital Lobe. Three years ago I was in a car accident, which I have fully recovered from, expect I have blurred vision in my right eye. Within a few months after the accident I went to many doctors to see what the problem was. One doctor concluded that my optic nerve had been jarred which can cause loss of eyesight. He said that after a year if my nerve turned white then that meant that this is what happened. He also said that I would never regain my eyesight in that eye. Now that it's three years later, there is still no sign that my optic nerve was injured and my eyesight has gradually come back but it is a very slow process. Another doctor could not reach a conclusion but he figured that it might have something to do with my brain. He told me that you could never tell if the brain can overcome such a catastrophe but the brain can do miraculous things. Sometimes during the semester I may come in a see what you think it could be because no one else seems to come to a conclusion matching another professional's opinion. I do not know if such a thing could happen to the occipital lobe so I would like to come in and see if just part of your eyesight can be affected if this lobe has damage done to it.
As I begin to write this essay, I am thinking of what my mind is doing in preparation for writing. I began going through ideas that have come to me earlier this day, trying to find one that I might be able to write about for 20 minutes. I can hear the TV on in the background. It's Monday Night Football, so my mind continues to convince my eyes to look over to my left and look at the teams that are playing. However, I know that I need to write this essay, so I have made a pact with myself not to look over until I'm done. I am occasionally checking my watch to see how long I have been writing. I started at 8:03pm, so I will be done at 8:23. Dennis Miller's voice is somewhat distracting since he doesn't sound like the normal, professional voice of a sports announcer, and I laugh at his jokes only because they are not that funny. Now I'm trying to think of something else, only because I know this essay was meant to show what my mind thinks of on it's own, and not my personal opinion of the football game on TV. I temporarily blanked out, and there was nothing I could think of to write, so I stopped and stretched my hands and neck. Even though I am concentrating on the computer screen in front of me, my ears have nothing better to do than listen to the ads. I don't think it's a good thing that I am able to tell there was a car ad on just because of the music playing in the background. However, I suppose that is why advertisers pick certain kinds of music. They're hoping that it will stick in the minds of the viewers and they'll buy that certain product. I do not know the specific car that was just advertised based on the music, but I am sure that it was some sort of truck that was being advertised as a tough, strong vehicle. The idea of advertising reminds me that I want to go into the college of communications. I know I am a creative and artistic person, so I want a career that will utilize my abilities and something that I can personally enjoy. I would love to be involved with an advertising team coming up with ideas for companies, or a sports photographer. In high school, I was the Photography Editor for the school newspaper. I took many photos for the sports section, and I truly enjoyed standing on the sidelines at the football games and taking pictures. By being so close to the players, I got to understand their true size and feel the emotions going on during the game. Now that I've seen what that's like, I know that when one watches a game from the stands, they are missing out on some of the action and emotion. However, after going to the UT game this past weekend, I realized that the crowd has its own vibe that is also fun to be a part of. As that streak of thought came to an end, I glanced down at my watch and noticed the time was merely 30 seconds away from 8:23, so by now my time is done.
It all of a sudden becomes hard to think when you are instructed to. haha. I am so overwhelmed with everything I have to do this weekend. I have so much reading to catch up on in all my classes and I am going to have to do it this weekend or I will never get caught up. I hate biology, I'm so lost, maybe I should drop it before it's too late. But that would be kind of dumb. I don't know how I'm going to pass the first test. I wonder if anyone else is as lost as I am. At least I'll be done with this pretty soon and I will have one less thing to think about. Maybe I can get Houston to drive on the way home for Ashton's birthday. I really don't feel like driving all the way back but I guess I have no choice. Wow, I really need to get her something. maybe a she would like a shirt from the co-op. My phone is ringing but it is across the room and I guess since I am being timed it wouldn't be smart to answer it. I wonder who it is. hope it's not too important. I guess I'll just call the number back when I am done with this. I'm really hungry, maybe when I finish this I'll go eat at the cafeteria. Hopefully they will have something good because Jester City Limits is too expensive and not that great either. I doubt they will though, a peanut butter sandwich doesn't sound that bad. My room is so quiet right now, I wish Erin would get back so we could go eat. I hate the annoying sound of fans which is the only sound I hear, but our room is too hot without it. I doubt they will ever fix the air conditioner. I really need to order some concert tickets online before it is too late. Taking Back Sunday and Saves the Day, Panic, and so many more I wish I could get but I'm poor. I guess I'll only go to two nights of Panic too. I wish I was in a band, then I wouldn't have to be in biology. Yay!  Erin's back and the T. V. is on. I would rather be listening to music but I figured I should do this in silence because if I was listening to music I would just sing in my head the whole time. I can't stand dumb commercials or long ones. Erin just reminded me I have to fill out that application. one more thing out of a million. I really need to get on top of things. Too bad I'm not more creative or that application would be easier. Hmmm only a few more minutes to think. I'm tired too bad I have too much to do or I would take a nap. A shower would be nice as well. I also need to go check my mail. I guess I'll do that when we got eat or something. 5,4,3,2,1. finish!
Roommates are playing music very loudly. Although, this music is good blues unlike the top 40 crap that normally comes blaring out of their speakers. My roommate is on the phone with a friend complaining about his classes, assignments, his teachers, and the other usual complaint. In the back of my mind I am a bit nervous about the paper I have to write for my Rhetoric 306 class. procrastination was a big problem of mine throughout high school. For a change, I wrote a page of the paper last night. However, I am not sure of the quality but nevertheless it is only a first draft and I just need to turn it in on time. Bing! Bang BooM! I hope I see this girl named Melissa at the Delta Gamma mixer tonight. I can't believe she lived in my hometown of Kansas City for two years. It's A small world after all. It's a small, small world. Bought printer paper today. Need to call my brother. Need to email my English teacher. So many things so little time. Oh well, keep on keeping on. I wonder why my brother Brent has not emailed me back. I wonder where he is? Did he leave Seattle? Who Knows? blankness washing over me. Who, who, who let, who let who who who let them dawgs out? Whistling in the hall. Shut Up! You are annoying me and taking over my stream of consciousness, but I guess it doesn't really matter what goes through the stream because the whole idea is just to type what is going through the mind. What is going through the mind? Tired? No, not particularly. Back is getting a little stiff though. Count backwards from 150 by seven and see if stress level goes up. Sickness. I was sick last week. coughing coughing coughing. runny nose, headache, ears hurt, throat hurt. Aaaagghh! Maggie. I miss my baby girl. She is a one year old poodle who I spent my entire summer with because of my broken leg. I miss her. I think she misses me. I hope she misses me. She has been sleeping on my bed. I hope she doesn't think I have abandoned her. Whistling. Boy, these guys are loud. Two days after a workout is when you are at your peak soreness. Full hour late for class. Oh boy, I am repeating the words of the guy that just walked into my room. Daily Texan. Something about the Daily Texan. Forever and ever amen. blankness Blank Man starring Damon Wayans was a really bad movie. Pure Crap! Soreness. I feel soreness too. My neck. Huge! Wow! Neat! OK Ok My printer is working pretty well. Printed off a bunch of stuff for biology. Three minutes left. Copies. Copies. Who let the dawgs out? This tune has become the anthem of the hall. One side actually likes the piece of rubbish. The other side plays it as a joke. Forever and ever amen. Ben Folds Five
Today I am very tired. Because last night I was up to two am to do my chemistry lab reports. First I thought it was easy and it wouldn't take me so long to do it. But actually it required a lot of consideration and calculations. After I finished writing the report, I found out that the report must be typed. The problem was I don't have a printer at home, and at that time, it was already ten at night. I didn't want to go to the library so late but didn't want to get it done at the last minutes of tomorrow morning. I went to knock at my neighbours' doors and asked them if they had a printer I could borrow. The lucky thing was that the second one I asked does has a printer and he let me borrowed it. So the problem had been solved. Then after this I kept on writing my Chemistry prelimenary write up. I needed put the procedures and data table up. That was a very long lab, there were totally seven experiments I need to do today and it spent me like eight pages for the pre-lab write up. So today morning I went to the lab room and turned in my lab report at the beginning of class. I am glad that I finally got it done, but I don't know what would the grade be since I was in a hurry last night. Then I start to do my experiments. It took me almost four hours to finish and after that I was so exhausted since I didn't eat breakfast in the morning. My data was so messy and I don't know if I could read them when I need to write the lab report again. After the lab, the first thing came up my mind was to go home and have a nice big sandwhich. At one o'clock, I had my math discussion class. I almost felt to sleep during that class since the topic the TA discussed was kind of boring and I already knew them. After this class, I had my Biology discussion class. This class is pretty cool because it took like 15 minutes then we could go home. So I went home and get on the line to have a little rest. I was chatting with my friends, checking email, and surfing until my roommate came back. Then we did dinner together. Tonight's dinner was good and it was the thing I enjoyed the most today!   Ah, two minutes left. finally, so what else I need to say?  So after the yummy dinner I started to write this assignment, and now time is up. I can go on to the next writing assignment. my hands are so tired
I don't know if I can handle all of this. Every semester I procrasnated with only 13 hours to worry about. And for the first time, in a long time, I am facing reality and taking my school work and my life seriously. The good thing is that I have a loving mother who understands me most of the times; I have a father that I do love and who does love me, but I don't watn to get in to it; and my pride and joy is my boyfriend who I love dearly, and Labor day is our first year anniversary. I have no clue what to get him. I mean we've always given each other what's in our heart (we don't like superficial stuff)--I've made many creative stuff like "two peas in a pod" with clay, paper mashad hearts for Christmas, cranes in a bottle,. and he too have made me stuff like putting our baby pictures to gether in a frame, written me poems, made a model Plymouth Plower (my favorite car last year), and he even went so far as to sew a heart for me. FOr a guy to sew is absolutely a amazing. It was so poorly put togther, some strings were loose, some parts were't even attached. etc, but it was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I must have cried, partly because I was mad at him at the time because I felt that he was not thinking too much of me. Was I surprised. So here's a delinma. How can I show him what he means on our anniversary when all my ideas have been used?  Plus I only have exactly 6 days to do this?  I was originally going to draw the entire Disney fairy tale characters, but he doesn't like disney. I was thinking of writing him a poem, but I'm just so much better at prose. So far, my idea is to just to write him a book with old scripture. Hopefully, with everything that I have to do this week, I'll be able to write it.
My dad and I are trying to reconnect our computer and get the internet back on it and he is driving me crazy. He insults my intelligence and thinks I never know what I am talking about. This really makes me upset and hurts my feelings to the point I just feel like breaking down into tears. I am also stressed out about school this semester. I am on probation right now because my GPA fell below 2. 0. I am really trying to keep up this semester and bring it up but it is really stressing me out. Sometimes I just feel like giving up on everything but I know that will not solve anything. My life just feels so empty right now. To start off with I get in a bad car accident a few months before I graduate high school and then get a really crappy job for the summer. Then I end up on probation at the end of my first year at UT and I still have the same crappy job for the summer. Then I also have to take a summer course at ACC along with my crappy job. Then I have to have surgery which put me out of commission for half of the summer. The next thing I know my boyfriend and I are separating after a year and a half. Now I am back at UT struggling to keep up and improve my grades. My life just seems to be going down the drain right now and I seem to be following close behind. Though I enjoy my classes this semester I feel I am going to fall behind and I will end up need major help to get through it all. I just wish I had enough motivation to follow through with my studies and just blow everyone out of the water with my grades this semester. I wish now that I hadn't put this assignment off so long because now I have to be all the way out here on campus instead of at home studying. You know if I don't get off probation I am afraid my parents or the school will take me out and I will end up at ACC permanently. Getting a degree from ACC is not the best thing in the world you know. It is almost like getting a GED from high school because you had to go to ATLAS or something to that effect.
However, I feel I could be falling into a trap that could severely effect my grades. My roommate is a friend from high school and unfortunately for me he likes to stay out very late. I have early classes and it is starting to take a toll on me. It doesn't seem as if there is enough time in a day. I am looking forward to playing club volleyball here and I really enjoy the coach. Volleyball is by far my favorite sport. I need to start asking some girls I have met out on dates. I am enrolled in a dancing class with one of my girlfriends and I am having a lot of fun with it. My parents are coming up to see me tomorrow and will be bringing my bicycle with them. It is funny, I love my parents very much but I really don't miss them. I don't have a desire to go home any time soon. My suitemates are having friends stay the night and I hope that they will not be too noisy. After the football game tonight I think I will do some homework and go to bed. I am looking forward to this psychology class. I find it very interesting so far. I need to be sure to keep up in my reading.
Today is September 4, 1997. It is twelve days before my best friend leaves for the NAVY. He has come to Austin to visit. I have dreaded these past couple of months ever since I knew he was leaving. He has been my best friend for five years. We have gone through so much stuff during those years. It is hard for me to say good-bye, but I know I must. We said we would see each other in six years but how will we know. it bothers me to know that he will forget about me, but I hope and pray he won't. Ever since he has come to visit we have went out and done something. Usually we just talk. He has been the only person that has understood what I feel. It's like we have some unknown connection that I can't really explain. But I realize that time will go one and maybe in six years we will find each other and things will be  the same as they were be for either of us left. but how will I be certain. I told him that this is the hardest thing for me to do. I don't know if he understands it or not, who knows. It's kind of funny. Everyone believes that best friends (when male and female) make the best couples. And everyone always told us that we will probably get married, I don't think so. There isn't that feeling of that kind of love there. When I came too UT and began to meet other people, I didn't feel that I was loosing him, merely that I didn't think about him so much. But there were times that I missed his companionship when I didn't have someone to talk to. That is what Im going to really miss the most about him. He has the great capability to listen and help out, even though he is male. But I will always love him and his great personality even if he changes during the years. I believe we have come to far in life as friends to let our friendship fail. September 16, will be a very sad and happy day because he will begin his career and future and I will be missing my best friend in the world.
I don't know what exactly I am supposed to write about. and I think about how much time I spend trying to perfect everything in my classes, but when does that ever go through. I think that there is so much to do and I have no time to do it it. the stress keeps growing and growing. I am a bad typer so this won't be as long as it should be biut I don't really care I keep fixing my mistakes even thoigh I know I am not supposed to I thik that my hand will start to hurt really soon after so much typeing that I am going to inevitablly have to take a break soon but I ll just keep going psy seems to be an interesting courseso far and I am looking forward to listening to some of the lectures. thinking/ I don't know what else I am supposed to type about so I am going to write words that don't mean anything to me I miss my mom and my family and I miss my exboyfeind even though we had a bad breakup, I don't know if this is approriate for this assigninment or not but I sometimes I think that my thoughts go in weird directions and I think abnormal thoughts that people don't usually think about but then again I am just another teenager who is full of life and evenerygy anf I I someimtes wish that my teenage days were over and I could then setlle down and do something useful with myselfv but I love being young I wouldnt give this up for the world and to know that in a couple of years I am going to be off doing sothing that will whats the word I am looking for effect, thats it, the rest of my life and the way that I live and the people I will be freiends with and the people I will work for what exactly do I have to do to make things work out for me/ what exactly do I have to prove to people to show them that I deserve respect and a good life/ I think this typing is a waste of my time because I am not even getting anything done and I haVE so miuch reading to do and I have better things to do than to type this and no one is even going ot read this it angers me that I have to spnend 20 mins on something no one is even going to look at there are about 600 people in my class and I doiubt anyone will know who I am for a long time f even ever. I wish that I never sined up for this classs as a freshman. I wish I could go home and not be stuck in a place like this and I wish things could change for me. I don't know how I am supposed to think about the way I think. I think thats stupid no one understans fully how the brain works. no one will ever understand the way I work and I wish they would all stop trying. I live my life for everyone else iu thats wrong, but I can't ever live up to any expectauions and it upsets me. I will most likely grow up to become a psyco! thats all. I'm stopping now. Jennifer Nguyen
I'm pretty out of it right now, still pretty sleepy. But I know I've got to do this since it's due in 3 hours. I can feel the onset of a headache, I don't know why. I think I've gotten enough sleep. Maybe it's because I haven't eaten enough. As soon as I 'm done, I'm going to pig. I'm kind of worried about my classes. I've already missed more than I should. I haven't missed any psychology but that's only because it's only twice a week and, more importantly, it doesn't start 'til 3:30. It's my latest class; all my rest are earlier in the morning. I've had a lot of trouble getting up. However, I think I can manage to catch up. I don't think I've missed anything terribly important. My lip is feeling a little funky right now. I got it pierced a few days ago. I really can't say why I did it. Maybe to set myself apart from others, maybe because I'd never done anything like it, maybe because I'm a teenager and I'm "rebelling. " I think I deserve to, too, since I don't drink, smoke, or do anything like that. I don't know how my parents are going to feel about it. Obviously, they're not going to be happy. But I don't think they can get too upset. Like I said, I stay away from all the alcohol and stuff like that that is rampant in college, so hopefully they'll allow me this one thing. I think I've been a pretty decent kid. I've also been taking care of my lip so it doesn't get infected so they shouldn't have to worry about it. Plus, my brother got a tattoo his first semester up here and I think that's more dangerous, especially since he got it on his spine. One thing that has me really nervous was caused by my own stupidity. I was over at my friend's house last night and he'd bought a doityourself haircut kit. Me, wanting to save a few bucks, gave it a shot on myself. Well, to trim my sideburns, I took off the clipper thing and just left the razor which is about a "0. " Anyway, I go to the other room to ask my friend how it's looking. He says it's all right but needs a little work. So I go back to the sink, pick up the clipper and proceed to run it up the back of my head. Immediately, from the sound, I could tell that I'd forgotten to put the #2 clipper on; it was still on "0. " Now, I've got a bald spot on the back of my head. I really started freaking out. People would think I was a freak. I wasn't going to shave my head, but I had my friend fix it up as beast he could but it's still pretty obvious. Now, I've got to wear a hat backwards for at least a week so no one will notice. I'm pretty selfconscious. If I thing there's something wrong with my looks, it becomes pretty hard for me to talk to people I don't know. Which sucks since I'm already pretty shy and since I'm still trying to meet new people. It looks like the twenty minutes are up now. I hope I did this assignment right.