I am sitting here with my feet on my subwoofer. I should be reading psychology, my webcam isn't on right now. Jars of Clay is a good band. I don't really have much to write. Maybe I should go to the sophomore versus freshmen football game at Clark's Field right now, but I'm doing this instead. Justin Shih just IMed me. Justin told me to go play football because this assignment isn't due until the 12th and today is the 6th. I think I'm scared about falling behind in college. I've done all my calculus HW the day they came out. I never was this diligent in high school. I have nasty cough, it's been like this for a few weeks now. I hope it gets better. Two of my best friends are in Houston, I don't really have much to do without them here. I'm hungry, haven't eaten breakfast or lunch. God is bigger than the air I breathe, the world we'll leave. This is a song by Delirious?, a band from the UK. I slept in this dorm last night by myself the first time. I miss my parents and my brother. My brother is working in California, and for the first time I feel how much everything has changed. I miss my parents, they have done so much for me. I want to do well in college so that their money doesn't go to waste. I love you mom, dad. I feel a little sad that I can't see my parents whenever I want now. I can't eat dinner every night with them like I used to last year. My neck hurts. I wish I was playing warcraft III right now. I don't understand this assignment. Maybe further on in the course it'll make more sense but right now this makes none to me. These thoughts are not at all coherent. I hope I do okay on my economics quiz on monday. My poker book and chips still haven't arrived yet. I ordered them last week too. I wish people would send me care packages. My roommate just received a birthday present/care package from his girlfriend. I wish I had someone who would send me things. I've written a lot. I wonder if all the papers turned in are this long. This must suck for the TA to read. 400 students turning in non-sensical and incoherent papers. There's that cough again. I wish I could control it. My hands are tired from typing constantly. This assignment sure is long, 10 more minutes to go. I hope I get an A in psychology. if I beg for an A in this paper I wonder if it'll help. Just 9 more minutes to go. I can't think of anything else to write. Maybe this music is throwing off my concentration. Jars of Clay is now playing. they're a good band. Didn't I write about them earlier? Oh well. People don't call me, I wish someone calls me. I'm tired, I could use a nap although I woke up at 1:30 today. I wonder what Michael, one of my best friends, is doing. I should go to his room after this. Just 7 more minutes. I can't wait until this thing is over. Time sure goes by slowly when you're counting it down. I need to go to sleep early tonight, got to wake up early tomorrow. EV Free church is good. I need to check out Austin Chinese Church too though, to see how each compares to each other. I need to do my quiet time today, before I forget. Sometimes I feel like such an inadequate Christian, I have so many failures. I guess no one is perfect. I wonder what my brother's doing right now. It's 1 o'clock or so in California. I wonder if he likes it there. I wonder if I really like it in Austin. or if it's just an illusion. I think I like it here. I have friends, I think, things to do. I don't know. It's all so confusing. Sometimes I just want to hermit and not have social contact at all. I like to live in a big city such as New York because it's busy, but yet I don't' like loitering in big crowds or hanging around large groups of people. I wonder if that's weird, or maybe I just feel inadequate around large groups of people who I don't know. Like last night at CBS I didn't know a lot of people and I drifted from group to group loitering but did not feel like I belonged. Just 3 more minutes left to go in this assignment. It cannot go by any slower. I should go eat something after this. But then dinner is coming up soon. I hope I have time to get some more studying done this afternoon, or maybe tonight. I wonder if this is the longest paper turned in. probably not, there're some girls who can write nonstop. They probably double the length of what I wrote. I wonder if I am even doing this assignment correctly, I don't know how to track my thoughts or feelings, it's like I'm writing in a journal. Oh well. I can't be penalized for trying. just 30 more seconds to go. let's count it down    30    29    28    27    26    25    24    23    22    21    20    19    18    17    16    15    14    13    12    10    9    8    7    6    5    4    3    2    1    done