As I look at this blank space, what am I going to write about?  There is no topic really, so I guess its up to me. I'm thinking about how I need to cancel my doctors appointment because the bug bites that have been on my leg for over two weeks are finally starting to go away. I have never been to the doctor at the SSB. That also reminds me that I need to go give a list of my professors so that I can get extended time. This whole timed writing thing is fairly new to me. I have had extended time for a long time, so its never really been an issue for me. But I do like this writing assignment, its nice not to have any rules and to just follow my stream of consciousness. I mean we wrote stream of consciousness papers in high school, but never like this for an assignment. It amazes me how far technology has come. What did students do before the internet? I mean, look at what I'm doing right now, this is crazy. How did people function and know things without internet and email. I have basically grown up in a world that has always had computers. granted when I was really young not everyone had computers, but for as long as I have been of age to where the internet would benefit me, it has always been there. That also applies to cell phones. I simply do not understand how people would find one another and get a hold of each other without them. I am so dependent on mine. Oh no, I just looked down at my to do list and realized I really need to call my owl pal for this week, I have never really met her, and they told me she was special needs. " from what I have heard she is not really the sorority type, and well, neither am I in some ways, but I really hope I connect with her because I think she feels like an outsider. the pledge trainers said she would go sit off by herself and I am really sad for her because I know what its like to not really know anyone and be forced, almost, by family to be in a sorority. but I hope I can show her how neat it actually is. I hope that talking about music will be a bridge between us. but god, I hate the fact of having to do something. Being obliged to do something really annoys me and it makes me not want to do it at all. I think I have gotten worse about that over the years. Over the years, hah, I'm only 19. but then again, I look at kids in high school now and think they look so young, its crazy, its like once I left for college, I can no longer be categorized as another kid. Its kind of sad really, and ill miss those days of always living at home with my parents to take care of me and annoy me, but then again, there's always holidays and summer vacation. I really hope that I enjoy this class and that it is not just so tedious to do the work. Actually, when I was reading the book the other day, some of it actually interested me, and I'm so thankful for that, it is so difficult for me to pay attention to things if I'm not interested. I don't know if its like that with everyone, or particularly because I'm adhd, but if something doesn't engage me, even the slightest bit, it is tedious to force myself to focus on it. I really hope that I find something to do with my life that I love, because that would really help, hah, I'm sure everyone says that, but I really do hope that that happens. I'm not exactly the hardest worker, but I feel like I'm going to be alright somehow. Its not like I can just sit on my ass with a trust fund or anything, because I know my parents aren't going to pay for me after college, but I know that I'll be ok. I sometimes worry that I won't be able to give my kids the same opportunities that my parents gave me, and that might be hard, but I don't really want to have kids unless I am mature and financially stable. Bringing it back to summer vacation. this summer I lived at home and didn't really work, but that's besides the point. I just wanted to talk about how I went home and totally noticed how privileged my friends and I are. I don't think that some of them really get it because their parents sheltered them a great deal more than mine did, but I mean, my friends from high school are some rich, spoiled brats, and I knew that before, but it really fazed me this summer. Its sad to me that my friends don't really know what its like to not have money, and I shouldn't be talking, I spend so much money and it doesn't really matter, I'm going to really need to learn how to budget money when its my own. Or learn how to not buy useless shit that just makes the place all cluttered. I hope we get more assignments like this one because its nice to get stuff out on the table, and I have a feeling no one is really reading this, because that would be a pain in the ass to read all this text that 500 students wrote. I need to call a couple of my friends at other schools, but its such a pain in the ass, bc schedules are never the same and we always miss each other and its hard to keep up with people and impossible to know every detail, but for some of my friends that stuff doesn't really matter and I know we will always be friends when we are together, and for that I am very grateful. with one minute left, what I'm I going to talk about, I wonder if it stops letting me type, or if I have to exit myself, that's crazy how its up there ticking away the seconds. turns out this wasn't so bad, and I'm glad I got it done now, as opposed to tomorrow when I have no class. well, talk to you soon, times up. tootles