ahs10/essays-big5 huggingface dataset:
My neighbor from across the hall is letting me use her computer because she is online. I went to Kinsolving and the lab was closed, that stunk. I'm very tired because I did not get very much sleep last night. Some girls on my wing and I were going to go to some Frat parties, but we wound up staying in the dorm and watching movies. It turns out one of my roommates friends is also in this psy. class, I thought that was really neat, although the class is so huge, it doesn't surprise me. I haven't seen very many of my high school friends here at UT, I really didn't want to talk about college because that is the other assignment, but it seems to be the most foremost thing on my mind right now. The Cowboys are kicking off their season tomorrow at noon!!!  I worked for them for about nine months, so I am somewhat obligated to watch, that and the fact that my step-father has been a fan for 23 years or so. I was able to get him a bluebook autographed by Troy Aikman for Father's Day this year!  I really enjoyed giving that to him I love giving gifts, it's my most favorite thing to do!!!  I love to make people happy and some people think I'm crazy for that, but I think it's great. That's another reason I have enjoyed my intern ship with the Cowboys so much. When I get a letter about a sick child, my heart sinks and to know that sending something from the Cowboys will make them feel better or at least distract from the state they are in. Let's see 7 more minutes of writing. My roommate and I were talking about our special talents, I told her mine was finding holes in sidewalks!!  Yes, if I walk down Guadalupe, I WILL fall in every hole and look like a fool in front of at least 20 people that happen to be walking by!! That is something else, hey!! I just found out that my step-mom got a new car, and my dad bought her old one from her. This is a man who says he cannot send me $100 a month, but can take a two week vacation to South Dakota and buy a new car in the same month!! Anyway, that subject somewhat depresses me. ok 2 more minutes of writing, I can handle it, hey I'll bet you can tell I'm a slow typer now, can't ya!!! Well it sure has been great talking to you. And as our good friend TEX would say: Goodbye and good luck.
I took a class in sewimming last year and it was a lot of fun. my cousin megan asked me to come to her dance recital in october but that is going to kind of difficult since I have three tests on the following week of school when I get back but life is short I may as well seize the day. I didn't call my girlfriend last night so she is probably mad about that but anyway. I like the class schedule that I am taking right now but it is only thirteen hours so I hope I finish my degree plan in four years since I don't want to be in school forever. I have a headache and don't feel like doing anything but relaxing. I wish I was traveling righnt now maybe around the swiss alps and doing some hiking camping and fishing and even some swimming just exploring beautiful places that I have never been to before. I woild love to just have a job where I could explore travel destinations and tell people if it was a good place or not or even just travel the world. I love adventures especially the ones like indiana jones does in his series of movies I think that that is so interesting and fun but I kjnow it is only a dream since all of that is just make believe but hopeuflly on e day I will get married and we can travel the world exploring different copuntries and places and seeing everything this world has to offer. this summer I got to visit seattle and it was very beautiful except that it rained every single day adn that got kind of depressing and made you feel gloomy but it was an experience and a very expensive one at athat. this christmas me and my cousince and bro are goign to go on a road trip kind of like the one on mtv called road rules where we go exploring places and then camping out and living off the land which is really a lot of fun. I hope my mom is having a good day and my dad and sister. my brother is up here in austin with me so we hang out my birthday is tomorrow and I will be the big 21 I can't wait. my firneds are throwing me a party this weekend so it is going to be a lot of fun. I have math homewrok thath I need to do
Dear Sir or Madam: I am writing to inform you of my recent achievements, thoughts, feelings, and general relevancy of life. I have been under some stress for the last few months due to recurring repercussions of the recent divorce of my parents. I am and have always been one who stands and is ready to be strong for others, but some time it takes more strength to cry. I am glad that my involvement in dancing had led me to this time so near my departure for the Olympics. This had helped to separate me from the hectic antics of family. Although it has given to great an amount of time to reflect upon my inefficiencies. Again as I type I am thinking I am wondering as if this incoherent gibberish will be or can plausibly be translated into recognizable human thought and used in my aid. This in itself has become a major threshold of relief for me. Confrontation of my fears has always been a struggle. Fears a plague of man for centuries, we can find cures to anything but be most tormented by nothing more than our own conscious being. See, as I continue I have diverged farther and continued in my pursuit of happiness and my race against fear. I fear that I am losing control. Not of myself but of family. They stray farther and farther from the objective, but seem to relentlessly ignore the many warnings and offers of aid from their peers. Is it true that we are not safe from torment even without villain, or can it be that the most prevalent villain be he who lives within us. Tearing at each muscle and heartstring, pulling our every emotion straight from the gates of happiness to the pits of despair. I've dug myself into this hole and finally confessed, but the only my own strength can bring me out. Ironic isn't it. I am not nearly psycho or even remotely suicidal, but life can bring one down. A carefree person is at the greatest risk, because it is with that lack of care that you neglect to watch for the advance of the ranks of despair. I have yet to find the reason or meaning behind any so feelings. Let alone answer any thoughts or feelings of my own, but simple writing forms a haven, safe place, or a virtual escape from the locks of my own mind. Only as I overcome the fallacies that I have founded my realities upon, may I escape the shackles of my own torment. I really have no problems, other than an overly kind heart and mind that troubles me more than worth. How can I escape my own shackles when it is by the same power that I am confined that I am held captive. My thoughts are low and stamina lost but open freely now are the gates of hope. Once again proving that the pen is far mightier than the sword.
I am so tired of school already and I want to go home and sleep in my bed and see all of my old friends I hate computers with a passion my stupid ethernet does not work and the front desk says there is nothing they can do all I can do is to call a number which I have been doing and getting no answer ireally miss Charley but he is coming to visit the weekend after labor day there are so many people fromschool in my psy class that I cannot stand and all of my classes area assignning so much reading for us if I read what I am suppose to I'd end up reading over threehundred pages a day and there is no way thatt is possible for me to do Biology is the worst class that I have the teacher is so boring and rambles on so fast which is really pathetic since bio is my major for the time being I have had the worst headache ever sonce I've been in Austin I just want to go home for a while and have my summer back it was so much nicer not doing anything all day except for hanging out with friends and parting all night I wish we could smoke inside I am on the thirteenth floor which is a pain to wait for an elevator just to smoke and when it gets cold inthe winter its really going to suck ireally don't mind any of my classes except bio but what if I drop the major and it was just because of the  teacher from this yearwho ruined it for me when if I had another teacher I might have acctually enjoyed the subject I am so tired of reading maybe I'll switch my major to math that is so much easier for me but what can you do with math besides be a teacher I really don't want to be a teacher because I hate kids I never want to have kids they are such a pain I really   don't see why any one has them tons of my friends back home have them Kim's kid is the devil himself he is so crazy and he's barely three I would not be able to raise another person for eightteen years straight  my head is really starting to pound everyone heere is trying to convince me to stop smoking but I think that would drive me insane and I'd be a really bitchy  person to everyone then I probally gian a ton of weight because if I am not somking  I am eating that's another problem with this whole college thing getting fat I was ten pounds lighter like six months ago and now if I gian any more I am going to go crazy maybe I should take metabolife pills but I don't feel like driving to the mall in rush hour traffic oh well iguess I'll just watch what I eat or at least try to  I really want charley to come to austin and visit soon he is the one person I really mis  since I've been gone thats weird cause I haven't missed my brothers at all  I never really got along with them any way maybe once we grow up we'll get along better  I don't really care now anyway my head hurts so bad I think I'll take a nap before I read ay of the billions of pages that I have for homework twenty minutes is over up all done with this one
K. , now I'm writing, but I'm actually kind of confused about what to do. I never really had an assignment such as this one. I feel no pressure since its for a completion grade, so I guess I feel some what good right now. I feel excited about school because I finally finished my schedule and its not going to be so bad after all. I guess my hopes are kind of high right now. I was also excited about your class since I nearly did not get in. At first, the class was closed and so I gave up until I peaked on my roommates computer to see that there was an opening in your class, but it closed again right after I added your class. I also feel kind of stressed because I'm looking for a job at the moment to pay all of my bills and my rent this year. On top of all of this I am now taking more hours this semester than I have ever had, so I guess I have my work cut out for me this year. I am also anxious about finishing this assignment now, I feel compelled to look at the clock and check to see if I have now surpass the 20 minute mark or not. Nope, still got quite a bite of time left. So, lets see what else I feel. I also feel somewhat lonely because I had to leave my family and friends at home. Even though I have two roommates, they are kind of kept at a distance. My goal this year is to try to succeed at a job, if hired, get a 4. 0, not party as much, and meet more people. I like meeting people, they are all so different and its funny to see likenesses in some. I found that you can also find people that remind you of others you used to know and you automatically share the same felling of like or dislike for that person because of the reminder. Confusion and hopefulness is what fills most of me at this point. So, I hope that's ok. Part of the confusion I feel is because of this class. I went to the pre-testing section to fill out the form to receive the free hour but the connection was bad or something like that, so now I had to finish assignment one now and do the test afterward if I'm allowed by the computer. Ah, my time is almost up and I'm feeling that sense of accomplishment. Alright now signing off, feeling good, tonytone.
For labor day weekend I went home and visited my family. I had to go buy a printer today because my the one I have isn't working so my family came with me to help choose which one would be the best for me to have. They made me go to about five different stores so that I could buy the cheapest one, but the cheapest one was in the first store that we went into. I hate shopping and the fact that I had to go to five different stores to realize that the best one was in the first store made me so mad. I'm excited about coming to UT, but it's a culture shock with five hundered people in my class when I'm used to having about twenty-five. It's really exciting being here though. I miss my friends though. I get to e-mail them a lot, but it's not the same as getting to talk to them face to face. I really like the girls in my dorm though. They all seem to be really friendly and nice. I like my roomate too. I was worried that I wouldn't and would be one of those people trying to get information on how to deal with your roomate. I hear the television on in the living room at my grandparent's house. I wonder what they are watching?  I need to figure out how to football tickets for the next UT home game. That would be a lot of fun to go to. I'm kind of stressed out with all this reading I have to for each class. I'm so used to getting worksheets from high school. It's so weird how high school and college are so different. Everybody says that, but you never believe them until you get there. I'm having hard time of thinking of things to write down. I'm getting tired from this. I think I'm going to watch a movie at the theater tonight. I love watching movies that you've never seen before; you never know what's going to happen. I missed my dogs since I've been away from them and that's only been a week. I'm so used to having animals around that it's weird to go to my dorm room and not hear a bark at some point. I have a minature doxen, a whippet, and a mut. I also have three cats, but I'm closer to my dogs. I need to go to Gregory gym and see what exercise classes I can take there. I also need to see if any one will go with me. I think my grandpa is starting to cook supper. It smells like hot dogs or burgers. I hope he doesn't put a lot of spices on whatever he's cooking. I hate it when he does that. I wonder where my grandma is?  She should be back from town by now. Who knows. I need to e-mail my friends again before I forget.
So, write for twenty minutes that should be easy enough. The concert last night was great I have never seen anyone play like that especially for that length of time. I mean goodness they played for three and a half hours. Victor is great I would have put incredible but I don't know how to spell it. I am kind of glad that I get to go home today. I mean I like Austin and all, but it's good to get home every once and a while. I'm also glad that Brandon got to come down for a couple of days, He was probably pretty glad to get out of Dallas for a while I can't believe this word processor doesn't have the word Dallas programmed in the spell checker. Some people. At least the ones responsible for the computers that is. Oh well. I wonder what everyone else is writing. I imagine that this could turn into some sort of confessional for some people. Weird. Read any good books? I haven't lately only newspapers and those don't count. I am excited about going to Berkeley next year. Not Berkley California, Berkeley Boston. Lots of good musicians there. Of course there are lots of good musicians here too, just of a different kind of breed everything here is about the blues while in the Northeast people look at things a little differently. Commercials on TV suck. I don't understand the ones that come on during prime time and then they say absolutely nothing about what it is they are selling or any relevant information about the products. Create interest nothing. creates confusion. Do theses people honestly think that the majority of Americans even give a shit about commercials much less THEIR product. Besides most of them are about disgusting stuff in the first place. Women's hygiene ads and balding men paraphernalia. Who cares people with those kind of problems would obviously know that they had a problem and most of them are seeking a solution so it seems to me that if you just shut up and spent your ad money making the best product on the market then people would buy it because it was the best. Not because Barbra on TV said that eight out of ten doctors seem to think that somewhere sometime this product might be exactly what you might be looking for. Well my time is done so I guess this is the end
I don't feel like going to class today, but because I paid a great amount of money for this education I might as well. But wait, it's a discussion class for Calculus, oh well, it's not like I understood anything what Dr. Friedman was saying yesterday in class. Do I really have to walk all the way over there? If I don't go, I can spend some of that time studying for a chemistry test tomorrow, as well as download some more songs off the Internet. The chemistry test is my first test and I don't how Dr. Brodbelt makes her tests. But because it's over the first two chapters, which were basically a review of chemistry in High School, hopefully, it might be easy. I sure hope so! Ahhh. school, it's getting on my nerves. Let this week calm down, it'll be okay next week. I can't wait until the weekend. On my gosh, I have 30 minutes until my next class, what should I do? Sleep, nahh. what if I oversleep, that would be bad. I guess I should start packing my books and looking for my keys to lock the room, which by the way, I really don't understand why the lock on the door opens when you turn the key to the left, and locks when you turn the key to the right. Shouldn't it be the other way around? Oh well, why am I making such a big deal about it, it provides me the security of my place. I should be thankful. Anyhow, I need to get to class.
ok, right now I feel tired and annoyed. maybe because I just broke up with my boyfriend of 10 months but maybe its because I couldnt get this website to work forever or the fact that I went to bed at two for no reason. putting the tired aside, I'm also pretty exited. my brother is teaching me how to solve a rubiks cube. I love doing things like that, but sometimes I give up too easily. not now though, I can't. not about the rubiks cube, but about the business school that everyone I talk to feels the need to tell me how difficult it is to get in,  but I'm not giving up. I'm trying to adjust to austin and its really not that hard, I just don't want to call it my home because its not- I've lived in houston my entire life. that's my home. even though I was raised in houston, ill end up in colorado. I feel like I'm trying to make conversation to a comuter which doesn't really work so ill just tell you about me. I love the color blue-any shade of blue, I love them all. I love cold weather even though I don't know what its like to be in a snow storm or shovel snow to get out of the driveway. I want a big truck when I'm old-not to show off but to be comfortable. I want to work, not be a housewife even though I do want kids maybe two or three. I admire my mom. she struggles and I love her. I was raised mormon even though I am not mormon anymore. I love dave matthews and sarah maclaclan  thier perceptions of life are awesome  I love songs that hit me right in the heart whether its an uplifting song or not. I love writing even though it takes me forever to write something worth reading. I like kissing. only when its sweet and meaningful for him and me. I love being a friend. helping those that I care about-it just makes me tingle inside. even though I wasnt always like that. I used to have the best scream. I was a selfish kid. I threw fits. I'm better, now I like to share. I didnot smile until I was two. sometimes I worry I have a bad heart because I can randomly have my heart go wild (literaly)  I wonder sometimes too if I got my moms manic depression. I'm not a sad person overall but I can be a lot. I always wondered how that worked too. maybe this course will help me understand. I like beer, but not too much. I used to drink to get my mind of things, now I realize that was dumb. now I write to get it off my chest. what do I think about?  god. the world. people. why?  I don't stand up to my dad even though my front pretends I do. I really just avoid him. his wife is evil, but her kids are the best. how do things like that work out? I have four brothers and a sister. I love them all. they are all so interesting and so individualistic. I have an ex boyfriend named ben that I am obsessed with and so does my roomate, mary. we both wore the same prom dress and bought the same bedding even though we did not shop together. I want her dad to mary my mom  hes neat. he writes for the houston chronicle and my mom is an english teacher. even though it wasnt her choice. she had to start working to be financially stable to avoid my dad. that s why I'm determined to make it in the business school and not be a housewife and drive a big truck.
Right now I have a flood of emotions coming down on me. Maybe I'm just to sensitive. I feel that I close myself up when I'm around my friends. Why I do, I do not know. There are some friends of mine that I can just relax and worry about what they think of me. My other friends, I just do not know. It's not just that, but when I am around a group of certain people, I can not open myself to them. The reason why, is that in the past, when I have opened myself to people, they turn on me or talk bad about me. I am very sensitive to things of that matter. I do not want people to think of me as being snobbish or stuck up when I do not talk to them. I act kind of quiet around boys because in the past, boys have now always been nice to me. Things have changed since junior high and high school, but still I have to watch my back. Who knows what they say or think about me. I need to stop being so selfconscious about myself and be more confident about myself. I think I am a nice person and I am openminded about certain things. I feel that if someone wants to talk to me, then I will be there to listen. Whatever they tell me will be held in confidence and not told to anyone if they ask me not too. I still would not tell anyone what they told me even if they did not say so. The reason why is that I do not think it is anybody's business. Well, I do feel that there are good qualities about me and some bad ones too. We are not perfect. Humans have their little flaws here and there. I will admit to my flaws. There are some that I am embarrassed to admit which means I need to work on them. Speaking about working, I need to work out. I worked out only once this week, and I need to work out more. Over the summer, I worked out almost everyday. Well not exactly, but each day was a potential day to work out. It was either school, work, or other emergencies that came up that prevented me from keeping up with my workout schedule. Even so, I still got my three to six times a week that I wanted to get. My clothes are fitting better now, which proves that working out this summer did contribute to my slimming down. Still, I have some more work to go. It's not just having a great figure, it is about being in good health, which we all need to be. I have noticed that after working out, my asthmas is not as bad, and I have not been as sick as I was in the past. Exercise and a good diet works. It can work miracles, and myself and thousands of people out there are living proofs. I can not afford to get sick right now, especially since school has started. If I was to become sick right now, I would be behind in all of my classes and that would not be fun. That would be bad. Let's hope that I do not go down that road.