I just finished working out. It was pretty tiring. I haven't worked out in awhile. It's kind of cold in the room right now. I'm always cold. I dont' really know why. It's kind of weird. I miss Freddy so much. Gosh, this webcam thing might not be so good. It's good that I can see and talk to him, but everytime I do see and talk to him, I just get sad. I want him here with me, but he's so far away. sigh. oh well. at least I'll see him at Thanksgiving. That will give me something to work forward to. Hmmm. My sister's husband is here for the weekend. It's still really weird. I can't imagine my sister married. It's quite strange. But she seems happy, so it's good. I feel bad that her friends are taking better care of her than I am though. Kind of makes me feel bad. But I'll babysit when the twins are due, so maybe that will make up for it. I'm going to work really hard this sememster. I have nothing else to do really. I can't go clubbing or to any parties or have one on one with any guy friends. With is kind of poopy. Because I actually get along better with guys. But it's ok, because he can't do anything either. I was going to write something and I just forgot what. I do that a lot. I'll like so upstairs or something and then I'll forget why I went upstairs. Yeah, it's pretty strange. Hmm. the tv is going on in the background. It's a pretty funny show. I need to go to the bathroom. I just drank a lot of water. But I still have like 15 minutes left on the clock. Wow. 20 minutes is a long time when you're just typiung random thoughts. I'm not homesick at all. I knew I probably wouldn't be. I've always been the independent type. Pipit is a pretty good roommmate. We dont' have the same friends or anything and we dont' hang out really, so I don't think we'll get sick of each other or annoyed with each other. She's out of the room a lot, so that's good too. I'm always on the webcam, so I guess its' good that she goes out or I think she'd be really annoyed. I havent' really met anyone new yet. I guess going ot UT does that to you. You stay in your comfort zone and it just takes too much effort to get out of it. Plus, it's weird. Even when I'm hanging out with friends or something, I'll start wanting to go back into my room to talk on the webcam. Man, I'm such a nerd. Haha, oh well. I think calculus will be my hardest class. I hate math. Ugh, at least I will have no more math after this class. woohooo. well, except that i'm doing accounting, which is a lot of math. But it's like simple math. So I'll be ok. At least no more integration in my entire life. goodness, that will be good to get rid of. Ahhh. . only halfway finished with the time. I tend to do that a lot too. I always look at the time. Even though i pretend not to. I still do out of the corner of my time. It's like I try to trick myself. But it's doesnt' really work so much. hehe. A lot of people are gone for the church retreat. I dunno. I kind of of wanted to go, because I didn't go last year, but I'm just not very comfortable with the church anymore. I feel like all they do is judge you. The pastor and the counselors and everybody just look down on you if you're not a servant leader or if you don't serve or if you don't talk to them and tell you all their problems. Yeah, I think it's pretty dumb. It's makes me really mad sometimes. They have no right to judge. My spiritual life is between me and God and no one else. uughh. Yeah, but I think I'm going ot find a new church when I go back from college. That will be good for me I think. Steven is iming my sister right now. I still feel kind of bad for him. They went out for like 3-4 years and then my sister marries someone else. But it's for the better. THey fought like everyday and he would always cry. SO that's not too healthy either. I miss my doggies too. Dusty Babulee Chen and even Mocha. Awww. my Dusty. I want him here to keep me company. I think Dusty is the only one who knows all my secrets. Because I know he won't tell anybody, considering he's a dog. He's so old already. It's going ot be so depressing when he passes away. That's going to be one sad day. I had a bad dream last night. Freddy dream-cheated on me. Man, that sucked. I was sooo mad when I woke up. I must be really insecure or something. THis is the second time I've dreamt that he's dream-cheated on me. Hahaha. That's pretty funny. It kind of sucks that my boyfriend and one of my really good guy friends hate each other. With a passion too. It's pretty bad. But Freddy has nothing to worry about, that's so gross. Rex is like a brother and I think of him as a girl too. I wonder if he knows?  He should. people always make fun of him about it. But maybe he just think we're kidding or something. Hmmm. maybe we should tell him. Dang, my hands are gettting really tired form typing. I don't think I exactly have the right technique. I wish I still played piano like before. I want to relearn the Chopin song. Maybe I will. . if I motivate myself to. That would be really good. That music class is pretty simple though. I hope these 3 months until Thanksgiving so really really fast. I cant' wait to see Freddy. Man, I think about him a lot.