Stream of consiousnesssskdj. How do you spell that? Fuck if I know. I don't seem to know much today. why the fuck am I so off. I'm just writing this shit cause it sounds pitiful. Or will hell the writing sounds like I'm writing for someone else to read. No one is going to read this, nor does what I write matter. So confess away. Make it worthwhile. What is this fucking heat I feel all the time, what the hell, I've heard the scientific explanations but they don't feel right. Hot cold I don't know. It prickles mwhen I should. I got a damn ticket today. my first one damnit. I was doing so good but I knew it was coming it was inevitable I f I brag about what I have why shoul di have what I get its not the fucking point to tel everyone else that I have it better than them. humanity is fuckecd can we save it which I knew I don't know anything all scienctific fac tis bullshit maybe some theory might hold over but that would be total luck. string wtf. microfribers connecting us all. Howhippie that's ridiculous how do I float about life s  easily just things come when I need them to. really really badly and make an effort and it sthere. its that way for some certainly not job ha ha that's the fuckin shit dud ei m so funny. I really like my new sense of the humore isnce the rool. the roll. jese what the hell was that I would like know. Dead space. And I type what a prick. the constant battle. Why is there a batlle are normal people at peace I don't think so otherwise well religion . I wonder what time it is I'm going toclose fuckk shit I'm I sweare I'm wahts it called the shit I know fuck ah ah damn I forgot to much pot is that problem is it the drugs. I really need to stop smoking cigarettes why is it harder now that she will be here sooner shouldn't I be overwhelmed with joy, iam but also shit is just annoying and I don't know what to do about that, I wish I had some sort of sign but I already had my gift and know what I need to do how can I reationally use  a drug experience to justify mylife, but it just feels right you knwo the path, now don't fuck it, is that hard why am I lead so far astray things are fyckeed up she feels off and away from me I want this to finish so I can meditate since I'm almsot there how do I fall into trances so easily I feel the warmth over my body enveloping me. holding me tight in its arms guiding me a warmer shorre, I hate comign back I'm going to be out if I do that, its ok, I can talk to my baby while I'm eout shell understand my fingers are getting tired I can  type really relay fast if I want to ha anyone readying this hasd no idea how fast I'm typing, they could estimate but thye wouldn't know for sure so ha. Reviewing what I have writtin was odd, it was like reading a trippers rants while high. My warmth. Wow, I sound so out there. I do feel that this is the way though, my path was a gift and I should appreciate it. Most people don't get to have visions of their daughter, I don't rember the face anymore, I'm so lost. This is so hard to do. I hate it. Why can't we just have our time. Alone. Away. Just the two of us and then the little one. I can't remeber her face but I can remeber that emotion. what a physical change when I think of her. I can feel the warmth surrounding my body. The love taking everything over. but then the back gives out and I kill my chakras. Transliteration sucks. 20 min of writing my thoughts is intense. the difference in punctuation is shocking, in the begging I used a lot of epsilons(mas o menos) and was excited, then I peak and nothing but chops of sentances, no punctiuations, calm down, have commas, and then periods. awesome, I lost my network connection. I wonder if that ruins this.