Being at cllege is a new experience for me and I think that it is giving me  a sence of being dependant on myself. I like all the new freedom that I have  gotten, but I also am homesick a lot. I miss my parents and being in my house  in Houston. There isn't anyone to make sure that I do everything that I am  supposed to do. I am a person that does not get stressed out a lot, ut now that       I am in college and having to take care of everything on my own, I am  getting worried and that is gettting me scared. I have a lot of thing s that I  need to get accomplished and don't have time for it. It makes me very  frustrated and annoyed at the same time. I feel like I should be a lot more  organized and up to date with everything. I am a very organized person, even a  "neat feak," and that is why it's driving me crazy when I am behind. I think  that if I work hard, then I will do alright.       Last weekend, I went home and visited my friends and family and it felt so  good to be home. I was able to go driving around and I knew where everything   was, and that feeling of being in control was great. think that I just need  time to settle into UT, and then I will be in more control. Austin is never  going to be "home" for me, but it will be a place that I can come to enjoy. I  don't think that any city can compare to Houston because that is where I grew up  and that's also where I have all of my family and friends.       Sometimes I think about how life would be like if I was adopted or even if  one or both of my parents were dead. I look back and don't think that I could  manage. My parents play a very important role in my life and I don't think that  I would be the same person that I am without them. I know a lot of people that  have parents that have passed away and they have really gone through some rough  times and they are doing well now, and I give them so much strenght and poer for  being able to do that. If my mother would pass on, I think that I would really  go into a state of depression, and would go trough a transformation, in that I  would become very quiet when usually I am very outgoing and lively. Many things  don't affect me unless they are very close and dear to my heart. I usually  don't cry in movies, and I don't care to become very emotional all the time. I  have too much pride to cry infront of people other than my family. No matter  how depressing the news, I am unable to show my emotions. That is something  that I think that I get from my parents, specifically my mother. I think that I  have gotten a lot of my qualities from my mother and most of my physical  qualities from my father. I think that I am able to be the person that I am  because of my parents. They helped shape me into the person that I am.       There are friends that I have been close to in high school, and ever since  I have come to UT, I have not been as close to. I don't know the reason for the  change, other than the fact that our schedules are conflicting and that we have  not tried as hard to keep in touch. I have heard that things like this happen  and that you make all of your really good friends in college. I know what  people say, but I have a really good friend at Trinity and me and her have keep  in touch really well. I think that she is an exception to the "rule. "