day long hot muggy water drips slowly out of the ground. non sequiter my mother peaks out from beneath the trees and laughs leaves shaking from her hair. a ground develops where there was just empty space before I need sunglasses not to be blinded. chocolate bars scream nothing and jenny craig addicts eat them yummy yummy. day is so hot and muggy the sky is falling. chicken little must have been surprised she must have screamed wailed a thousands songs. the fox picked them up when they bounced of my throat and stuck to the corners of the world. stickier sticker than any glue any oatmeal face prepubescent girls use to give themselves a facial. thought thoughts hard to track when they come so fast or not in any order whirling monsters in my head searching for some shape searching for the perimeters exit. monsters under my bed no matter how big the rat trap was it never caught they never took my bait. instead they curled up beside me until I was no longer afraid afraid until morning scared me more than night and night felt beautiful empty. when you can't see something anything is possible it is easier to dream. the daylight defines things in ugly fluorescent light, not even with a decent amount of shade. in daylight you discover your mother is old and your grandmothers hands made of paper. and once you realize you will become only dust and are not afraid then you know the comfort of end. and you look forward to papery skin because it means the end will soon come of being so fucking tired and you can rest. and then you become scared to think about heaven eternity who really wants to live forever, endlessly. I'd scratch my eyes out with boredom. then you become scared of your name because it fixates your identity and you are some how attached to it. it you repeat your name enough it is dissolved into eternity and then you can't get out of bed in the morning. morning bring day day defines defines disceiting pea pods in father orgasms as the little miniature gypsies walk by laughing and singing troll songs charging me ten dollars to come under their bridge. frogs frogs never turn into princess and if they do they immediately shoot themselves in the head. there just is no going back ever ever. when alice looked into the looking glass she just feel and feel and fell and landed on the mad hatter kettle it was her unbirthday. happy unbirthday to you. red lines flick across my head my tongue is not long enough to catch them no honey for bait. I observe quietly this is how the universe was created. splat spat humpty dumpty's egg whites hit my head and Jill came stumbling after. on one leg. the jolly green giant has her other one locked in a glass jar on his table his children hump it before they go to be, their daily confessions to their father. father I'm sorry I have sinned please watch me do it repeatedly wierhoden Sie Bitte. I was out of the room Wierholden Sie Bitte. Danke Shon. my bonnie lies over the ocean inside the ocean nothing crawls out on legs legs develop into fins connect the dots lalala surrealism is incited by a kid with a kite flying upside down dali looks at a patty melt sandwich and discovers a movement someone looks at the wrapper and defines ecology Kermit the fog pukes and pukes and pukes. miss piggy makes him eat it up with a spoon a black rusty one saying O kermy or kermy mashed potatoes on the computer but not gravy cafeteria kind looking like an ice cream splat my friend used to always eat them with her finger while snot ran down her nose I was embarrassed for her and ashamed of my snobbery. pee girl gets the belt. outside the black ground decapitated head grew on trees a skull inside inside the most delicious porridge anyone had ever eaten stood bubbling bubbling. no one ate except the very very very bad girl. th3e girl who said nothing rocked herself under the tree growing silent roots. if I say nothing no one will ever be offended. it never occurred to her that her silence was offended like in the same way she discovered later as the smell of her cunt. her own body was offensive, defensive but she loved it once she learned how and all the kings horses couldn't break her again. and all the kings horse never even tried she grew wings but tore them off over and over and over. the white wall is turning blue the more I stare at it the closer it becomes I'm suspended by it women walk behind it wailing I can't reach them I'm to tired to scream to tired to move. my hands are creatures of their own highly adaptive spiders crawling over letter letter letter form words word are symbols of meaning but if you repeat the word mom over and over and over it makes as much sense as an animal sound. mom mom quack quack mom mom quack quack. absently no difference past a certain point. the little girl told the grizzly bear she was lonely and scared the grizzly bear said so am I. if that had been a brother grimm's talk the grizzly bear would have taken of her head. click click click or ticktock the mouse runs up the clock no matter what the nose. pink walls and Pocahontas braids swirl in the trash spider are becoming tired and tired and my hand are empty again thank god.