Wow, so here I go. This is actually pretty exciting, I don't think I have ever had such a fun writing assignment. Jessica's music is on, her music was playing at the same time as mine, hers was rap, mine was "honey and the moon", weird combination. she's still listening to it. I have an aftertaste of godiva chocolate in my mouth, my sister sent me my shirt I forgot. and I was just at drews, across the hall. I wonder how I did on my bio exam. We get the grades back today in our review session. It was stressful but I think I did ok. We'll see I guess. My sheets are bright I wonder what everyone is doing at home right now. Let's see. its almost 3, so everyone's working. I miss Jude, he's so cute and now that I'm here I'm going to miss out on him taking his first steps, him first talking, etc. But it was fun watching him grow. I miss him the most. It'll be nice to be home next weekend, I want to lay out in the sun by my pool, with my dogs. Tonight's going to be busy, with me catching up in all my classes and all. But what I really want to do is see Drew, because I like hanging out with him. But then once I get back into my room, and I shut the door, that's when reality sets in, and that's when I realize that I have to stay with Scott because he needs me right now. And it wouldn't be fair after all of this. This writing assignment is pretty crazy, I still have awhile to go. Maybe I just don't have enough to write about? Let me think here. I find myself staring into my panoramic photo of a sunrise on the beach in Hawaii. It's a pretty tight picture, and I wish I could just be back there right now, instead of stressing here at school. Even though this experience is pretty awesome. I still find myself stressing more than the ordinary college student. My insecurities keep building up , until something or someone comes along and then I'll let them fall down. One of my goals is to be able to walk around with my head raised high up, chin up, smiling, confident. I wish I could be that person, but for some reason I guess I feel too uneasy about my appearances. Most likely, that is the result of going to a school with really judgmental people. Oh well, it'll just be something I need to grow out of here. That's one thing that I love about UT, no one really cares what you look like, talk like, etc. It's a nice change. Last night I had another crazy dream, I want to start writing them down but sometimes I just can't remember them. Like last night, some guys broke into my house, and they were chasing us out. But I somehow convinced them with my kindness or something (as I do in many of my dreams that are very similar to this) that they should leave us alone. I just remember showing them my "mastiff" dog. Ok, is that even a dog, or did I make that up or what. Whoa, a crazy thing that came across my mind yesterday was this thought (I was actually thinking about it yesterday in psychology class): "They say that color is the result of light being absorbed or reflected off of an object. So in order to see color, there has to be light, right?  If that is true, then is it true whenever you go into a pitch black room, everything is actually without color?! I know that everything wouldn't be in black and white, but wouldn't everything be in black at least?! Everyone would be of the same color in a dark room? It's pretty mind baffling to me. " Also, I've heard that whenever you dream, you don't really dream in color, but your mind and memory make up the colors. They are not true colors. Who really knows anyways? The zipper of my Dior makeup bag is dipping into the cap of my orange juice bottle that I had this morning. Last night was all fun and games until I got home and realized how unsure I am of everything right now, and it's really not a good feeling. I guess I'm just getting used to this whole thing, just transitioning. Jess forgot to get milk last night, so I had dry cereal this morning. There is still some left in my bowl right here, I was too busy rushing around, trying to meet Scott in time for chemistry.