ahs10/essays-big5 huggingface dataset:
I really wish I didn't have to do this. Actually I don't want to do homework at all. I don't like reading textbooks and that is all we have been doing. I actually didn't even start reading any of my books until I knew I had to for an Economics quiz. This weekend the plan was to catch up on everything and I really didn't. I did catch up on economics, which is the hardest class I'm taking. I am really disappointed that I didn't get to see my friends in Arlington, but I did get to hang out with my parents and that was nice. I miss them but I love college and Austin. I also hope that I get to hang out with my cousin more and get to know her a lot better. Unfortunately our age difference is huge so we don't have too much in common but she has been calling and cooking for me so I don't mind that. Cat's here and she's talking. Jessica is here and she's messing with channels. Earlier we watched the U. S Open after she got home and we watched Justine Henin-Hardenne lose. Yay. Oh, I really have to sneeze and I'm kind of thirsty. I really want to eat some peanut butter and crackers and maybe a taco. One time our fridge was leaking stuff that looked like coke. Today I talked to Alicia's mom more that I talked to her. I actually didn't get to talk to her because her voicemail turned on. I hope she is doing ok at UNT because she hasn't sound happy or upbeat when I have talked to her. I talked to Amanda today too and now I'm so frazzled and distracted. Cat and Jessica are loud and I can't even complete a train of thought. It's kind of scary if a guy has a blow-dryer. Is William Faulkner the dean? I don't know but I'm so excited about UT. Jessica has a lot of clothes, food, and books and I think my dorm room is going to be vacuumed up by her stuff. Today I bought milk, actually my mom bought milk, and then we drove to Kinsolving. Later, I tried to put a fitted sheet onto my bed and it took a long time to put on and Jess made fun of me because I couldn't put it on. I just told Cat that she couldn't have a Kleenex and it was pretty funny. I really like college and all the people I have met so far. They are so nice and I love them.
as I begin this assignment its seems weird to me that I am in college  and I locating my professor on the computer I don't have to be in the room  to hand you an assignment I have to get up early for class tomorrow usually I'm in bed by now I don't know why I up, I seem to have this spurt of energy tonight I've gotten so much done tonight though I so stressed out this week but today I realize that I've been stressing over future stuff and I was looking at the wrong dates on my syllabus oops forgot to hit the return button typing is making me so much more tired  tonight when I'm done I will go to bed I love waking up in the morning its such a fresh beginning feeling forgot that stupid button again next door the music just got turned on real loud they better cut it out by the time I'm ready for bed I wish Wesley were here to go to bed with me Maryland is  so far away at 1 in the morning, not that its any closer at 2 in the afternoon but things are so much more in perspective at that time wow I bet this is really  improving my typing skills, not that they are bad I had that typing class in 9th  my back hurts this position hurts but in 9th grade that teacher what was her name. . . oh yeah Mrs. reader and she had that annoying voice. aaaaaaa now class . bbbbbbb is everyone understanding how to switch the fingers to the right letters? this class psych reminds me of my mom she is a therapist I like hearing her talk about that kind of stuff but I don't like when she uses her therapy shit on me anyway I miss her I hope her business trip is going well Virginia seems far away at one in the morning I  wonder why I typed that 1 out and just pushed the one key for the last one? anyhow or anywho I can not stand that . anywho! I am not capitalizing my I's anymore cause Im tired and you said we didn't have to worry about grammar well I have two minutes and to tell you the truth I am now ready to quite and  go to bed.
I can't believe it!  It's really happening!  My pulse is racing like mad. So this is what it's like. now I finally know what it feels like. just a few more steps. I wonder if he is going to get any sleep tonight!?  I sure won't!  Well, of course I have a million deadlines to meet tomorrow so I'll be up late anyway. But OH! I'm so so excited!  Yes!  Yes!  I can't believe it is finally happening. Wait! Calm down. We aren't officially a couple yet. What if I end up not liking him?  That would be horrible. Oh great, I wonder how long it'll take me to finish those Calculus problems?  I'll get it done. Don't you always, Amy?  I can't believe Bob did it!  He really did it!  He is THE miracle worker. If things turn out all right I will owe him more than I can ever repay. I wonder what Steve is doing in Malaysia right now?  An entire month!  I'll likely clean out his refrigerator by then. Omigosh!  Food, lunch tomorrow, what will I ever say to him?  He is perfect in every way imaginable. It is so important for him to think of me the same way. well, maybe not Perfect, but certainly dynamic. Who would have ever thought!  Good things do indeed come to those who wait!  Oh, I'll have to remember to sign the poster he made tomorrow morning. I hope Steve's alarm clock is reliable and I don't oversleep. That would be tragic if I slept 'til noon and missed the lunch. Thank goodness Portia is coming along. I will definitely need her support as well as Bob's. just having her there will take away some of the tension and put me more at ease. I'll have to rehearse what I say beforehand. things can only get better from here, right? hopefully. oh, I'm so nervous!  He will be too. maybe even more so. it'll be ok. Why in the world do humans put themselves through such torture. maybe love is really worth it?
It comes easy just to type out what I am thinking, I am used to keeping a thourogh journal. It didnt necessarily have written sections like a   dear diary   but had many ideas and thoughts expressed in art. I really do love art. The communications school has a fantastic creative program which I hope to become a part of. It a rigorous comittment that i feel fully qualified for. That is my own concieded thought. Anyways, college has been everything I expected for and more. My professors are interesting and the social scene is very entertaining. I still find myself getting sad at nights because I am not with some of my closest friends. Lauren Nagler, Stephanie Miller, Adam Gutmann. . some kids that are really special to me and its really sad not seeing them everyday. I also see myself getting sad that i can not see my parents everyday. I talk to them quite alot but its not the same. It kind of scares me too since my mom is going through alot, and batteling cancer, and my inconsiderate brother takes no responsibility in the family. It was supposed to be my year at college my time to be   off duty   and my brother thinks its appropriate to go and work in the Netherlands. I have such ill feelings for that boy. Besides that. I mean life goes on. You can't get stuck in a rut. you got to live each day as it comes. There has been some drama in my   new   life here at UT. It is all a bunch of dumb girls who think they know what they are talking about and they really dont. I am a pretty chill, I am not a competer. ill quit before the race begins just because i don't care about things that much. And especially with guys, I am not the type of girl to be a homewrecker. And for Petes sake I am only 19- a freshman- its not like the people we have found this week are going to be our soulmates for life. Anat- the girl whose giving me the worst vibes in the world thinks she can call dibs on every guy- who is she to do that??? whatever- again i don't compete- take them all and be happy- i am too worried about my grades and other things that are improtant to me. This writing assignment is actually pretty cool. Its like a way to vent out whats on your mind and get a grade for it. It is really hot in my dorm room right now, and the cd i was listening to is over, Lynard Skynard, what a good cd. I think my car phone is broken too and its like the fourth one i have gone through- I got these cute pictures today at tops photo. i am really getting into the swing of things here at UT and its really comforting. I came with alot of friends. some who i didnt reallly want to hang out with some I did- I have met alot of cool cool peeps and i am definatly having a good time. Its really hard to find something to talk about with there is one minute left----
It's Sunday and I need to go to church since I didn't go this morning because I woke up at 11:15 and church is at 11:30. So I already took a shower and I'm dressed to go at 8:00 p. m. Right now it's 7:25 and I wish it was about 4 because it seems like the day has just went by and I haven't done very much. That's alright though because I'm listening to my favorite rap music. Trick Daddy Dollars, Ja Rule, DMX, Ice Cube, Hot Boys, Juvenile, Black & Dangerous, K-ROC, Too Short, Twista, and JT Money they seem to make me feel better. Even if I'm feeling down in the dumps a few rap songs seem to bring me back to reality and happiness. Earlier my girlfriend called and we had a serious fight because she gave my roommate a little attitude yesterday when she called. She got mad because I was not here and my roommate didn't know my cell number or my friend's which is where I was at. So I had to lay down the law and tell her not to take out her anger on my roommate. I was mad also because I gave her my cell number the day before but she didn't write it down. So we argued for a while about that then she told me something that her and her friend did that I didn't approve of. So I was instantly angered because I have a short temper to begin with. It was a big deal really but I don't let anything go by even the smallest fuckups. So we started to have any even greater argument than the first one and didn't end on a good note. She decided that she didn't want to talk to me if we were going to argue. I acted like I didn't care so we just ended it there. This worries me because I hate to end it like that but I'm so hardheaded that I won't let anyone know that they're really hurting me. It also hard because I'm here and she's 355 miles away and I can't see her the way I use to. I guess I'm going to have to get use to this and college is a lot different from what I'm use to. The girls wooo some of them are pretty fine and all the people I've never seen so many people in one place at one time. Being from a small town this is a totally different atmosphere that I'm not used to. Hopefully I'll find my place here make the best of it and things will turn out great. I don't want to let college change me in the wrong ways. Whatever happens I'll just try to do my best and do the best I can as things come along.
Well, I am now officially writing my first college paper" more or less. It is really hot outside today. I wonder when it is going to cool of so I won't swear so bad when I walk to class. I think that I need to really concentrate on my homework and studies when I get them, instead of putting them off. It makes me feel like I am bogged down when I have a lot of stuff to do at once. It is actually really stressful. I kind of like this song that is on the radio. Busta Rhymes has not ever been my favorite rapper, but I think that this song is ok. Pharrell really makes this song what it is. Now come to think of it. I don't think that Busta Rhymes sang that song. oh well I guess that this assignment is for my thoughts and mistakes, so I won't correct my mistake. My chair is pretty comfortable. Hopefully I will do my homework in it when I am done with this writing assignment. The longhorns really kicked New Mexico State's butt. I think that Chance Mock (the quarterback) got to a ruff start, but he has waited for several years to get his chance to play as the Longhorn's Quarterback. Although Vincent Young came in towards the end of the game and did phenomenal, scoring 2 touchdowns on his own rush attempts, and throwing a great 60 yard pass, I believe that Mock should continue to start as QB because he has put in his time as scout team player. My, that was a really long sentence. I am tired of eating the food at the Jester Food Court. They have a big selection, but the selections never change at each station. I kinda miss my mom's home cooking. I can get over that. I was aware that there was a ton of students at this campus, but I guess that I didn't think that I would see so many people going to class everyday. I kind of feel like a minority in Austin. Coming from a small town in East Texas that is mostly white, black, and mexican, I am not used to seeing so many asian students. I am not against asian people at all, I just have never seen so many at one setting such as UT. The temperature in my dorm is not to my liking. I am a very hot natured person, and I prefer that it be cold in my room. Being all covered up under your blankets at night when it is cold is a great feeling. I dislike sweating when I sleep. I need to go to the gym today. I am getting out of my routine of working out each day. I need to get on a balanced routine between schoolwork and play. It is kind of hard to be disciplined once you don't have your parents to tell you what to do. The experience at UT is a good one though and I am not complaining. The only thing I dislike about it right now is that I still have yet to purchase all my schoolbooks. The Co-op did not have my MIS book today like that re-order said. Nothing is ever perfect. That is not a bad thing though. I hope that all of our writing assignments are this easy CZAR. This is an easy grade. There are so many fine girls here at UT. Everywhere you look you see a hottie. I love that. Some of them seem fake to me though, but I know that I shouldn't judge people. My phone is ringing and I am almost done. Alright I am done. Later.
the end of this song is so weird. what was Andy on when he thought of it. now this song is pretty cool. it bumps. too bad my sax solo was gay. I think that funk is the coolest type of music. I can't believe that maceo parker is  playing at antones. I am so there. I can't believe I remembered the number man, I wish I could get rid of my damn computer virus. what a pain. my knee hurts. I so stupid for busting it. I think that my dorm room has to be the coolest in jester. jeff is such a pimp. too bad he sounds kind of white. josh is the coolest though. he's just about the funkiest drummer Ive ever played with. I don't know if Im supposed to be pressing enter, but if I don't I start writing off of the screen. I think that Im gonna like psychology. it's pretty interesting. I hope my stereo is bugging anybody. the concert tonight is gonna be cool. I just hope that I don't get killed. this song  cracks me up. I gotta leave in 20 minutes. I better have a lot of sugar to keep me awake. I can't believe how tired I was last night. maybe I should  have slept over at the girls place. I got to record my CD and send it to b. Ive gotta find out when I need to take defensive driving. these pizza rolls are so good. man, jester food sucks. the only good thing is the cereal. salads are ok. the pizza is decent too. my new hat sucks. it's really  uncomfortable. my brother is so whipped. me and my twin brother aren't really a lot alike. he is so disgusting when he's around his girlfriend. I guess that keyboarding class paid off. paid or paid. ly or lie. die or. . . well maybe not. what the hell am I talking about. this is a pretty crazy assignment. over half way done. it pisses me off when my posters fall off of my wall. CDs over. what do I want now. how 'bout a little screaming headless torsos. they are the coolest. jo jo meyer is the most amazing drummer in the world. too bad I can't go to the first game. I still gotta get that sports package. some much to do, so little time. almost done now. my mind has gone blank. Ive got to wash my clothes. if I don't do that tomorrow, Im gonna smell all damn week. Ive got to read a lot this weekend. this is boring. Im sure who ever might read this cares very little about what Im saying. oh well. looks like my time is up now. just gotta push the submit button. bye.
I always knew college was about being on your own and being independent. Maybe I have been so busy that I didn't realize I was completely on my own until I got sick. Being sick is just one of those things I have never had to accomplish on my own. I always had my mom to take me to the doctor and even after I could drive, I still loved her company. I also knew that she would get me my medicine and make sure I was taken good care of. Being away from my mom and that comfort zone was not very easy when I became sick. It has definitely shown me that I depend on other people a lot, especially my mom. If there is one thing I am looking forward to about college, it is growing as a person. I hope to become more independent and prepare myself for the future years ahead. I always went away to camp during the summer and spent six weeks in Israel one summer but for some reason, being in college is a much different feeling. I want to be able to do things completely on my own without consulting others, like my parents. I think the greatest thing I need to conquer is decisionmaking. I have always been bad at making up my own mind without asking someone else if I am making the right decision. I hope being in college will teach me to make good decisions and become that independent person I want to become. Already being away from home has taught me so much about myself and how it feels to be distant from that comfort zone. Just like most things, I know it will only take time and patience.
Today is September 11th. I was reading some articles on MSN. com about whether or not we should commemorate this. I had a class at 9:30--I wish I didn't have to wake up for this class. It seems like whenever I have to wake up for a class it drains me of energy. I'm glad that the only other class I have is in the afternoon today. Speaking of which I'm going home for the weekend--that makes me happy because I will get away from everything related to UT Austin. My roommate was in the room, he just left. I am writing on my laptop--it's very hard to use this keyboard. I am tired right now. I don't know what to do. I have calculus homework to do. I feel like it has been looming over my head. I can't wait to go to home. I feel more comfortable here at UT now. I think I'm getting along with everyone. I don't feel stressed out anymore. I feel like there is nothing to be bummed out about. I will find what I like to do here. I might join the badminton club. That sounds like fun because I used to play badminton and now I don't anymore. I don't play it anymore because I don't feel like it. Being at UT is a lot of walking, I'm tired cause of it. I think a lot of my thoughts are being filtered when I'm typing. I am Indian. My parents are from India. They are very nice people and they are at home. Sometimes I feel like they miss me and I miss them. I am going back to see them. I am getting tired of typing on the keyboard. I think I am a smart person. I wonder if other people think I try to act smart. I don't really care if they do. I'm just being myself. I get along with others. I don't think I will be completely satisfied in life thinking I have to be something when I grow up. I should just stay happy as I am right now. I think that would be a good life plan. Just take it easy. That's what I'm doing right now. My computer is a Dell and it's a laptop--with a small keyboard. I got it new. My roommate just came in. He is doing the laundry. I feel like he feels that he has a lot to do. It seems to me he likes to work. I am going to keep my life simple here at college. I won't expect myself to be a superhero. I think waking up for class is good because then the day doesn't go by. In college you have a lot of free-time. I think I spend too much time studying ineffectively. I should set good goals and then spend time making friends. I am very happy right now. I feel kind of just like sitting here and not getting up. I have to get up to get the trash. Whenever I do work, I think of doing it in sequences. Sometimes I act smart. It's okay--I like to make intellectual jokes a lot. My parents used to take the trash from my room when I was young. They did a lot of things for me. Now I have to do a lot of things on my own. That's okay--we're almost out of milk. I'm going to get paper plates and paper cups so I can just throw them away after using it. I'm getting hungry. My roommate is eating Spaghetti from downstairs. That tastes good. Am I being artificial?  Am I talking as if I want people to hear what exactly I'm saying. I don't now. bye
Tony just walked into our apartment and Ashley is asleep. Maybe I need to work on some other stuff. This pre-testing page is down. it keeps shutting down every time I try to use it. I wonder why I even try sometimes. Why am I doing all this stuff enter night. into night  grain of sand. off to never-never land. I just typed Metallica lyrics. I don't even like Metallica   this is kind of weird. I don't think that I can keep doing this for 20 minutes. Ashley's starting to wake up now. at least most of my studies are done because I'm going to play Broomball later tonight. Do I play at Trees or not?  I just think that it will be too hard to actually get to Dallas in time to do it. I can't relax enough to do stream of consciousness. I'm completely aware of everything I'm typing even though it's not selective. boy Tony is loud. Ashley's so cute when she's sleeping. she's starting to wake up. oh wow. I can see her underwear. she'd be a bit embarrassed. she's up know. and gave me a big smile.        now she's laughing at me. now she's trying to talk to me and distract me from my work. going on for twenty minutes?   My word. I don't have time for this. I think I have the Psychology department figured out but I think they just have everybody take these intro psyche classes so they can get info for their own experiments. they just make it look like a class so they have a bunch of subjects. a cigar. I could use one right now. I'm so stressed out. I'm tired of that bare naked Ladies song. Zach is talking to me right now. what a moron he is. . just about random stuff. . yes go on. exchange the genesis for mario kart. that's a good idea. we're getting mario kart. . I guess I'm going for twenty minutes. . it's been a long time. I have no more to write. I'm going now. by3e.