Okay so I'm sitting here in my dorm room and looking out the window and I see trees and squirrels and birds. I really like my dorm because when I walk outside to go to class. I always see so many squirrels and they come right up to you and they always are carrying nuts and okay maybe I should stop talking about the squirrels but they really are cute. I'm trying to think what I've done today because I feel like I'm wasting the day away. I woke up at about 12:30 and went up to my friends dorm room and got her and her roommate out of bed. We all went to Subway obviously because we were hungry and sat there for like 30 minutes. I came back to my dorm and my roommate is very consistent about getting on my nerves. Her boyfriend broke up with her 2 days ago and she definitely isn't being the sweetest person. She is rather annoying and whenever my ex boyfriend calls me, she freaks out. I think she is jealous. but what is there to be jealous of? It's not like I have a wonderful boyfriend. My ex boyfriend. Travis. he goes to UTSA because he didn't get into UT. He will be here in a year. Well. he broke up with me before we went to college for unknown reasons and was a total jerk. I feel like such a prissy girl talking about my boy problems. Hmmm. well basically he (Travis) came crawling back and is begging for me to get back together with him. We were together for almost 2 years. Well I told him we might be able to get back together but really I have no intentions of getting back together with him until he gets to UT and by then hopefully I will have either found another guy or completely gotten over him. I love him still and it frustrates me. College frustrates me right now. I always had a lot of work in high school so I am used to the work load but I am just boggled down with things to do. Like laundry. And sorority crap that is pointless. We had some pledge retreat to go to this weekend and I skipped out on it. I feel guilty" but then I don't. I didn't see the point in spending the night at the Chi-O house and sleeping on the floor in a room with 51 other girls when my mother pays a lot of money for me to have a comfortable bed at Scottish Rite. I don't think the sorority girls will buy my reasoning what so ever. OH well. what can I do? Nothing. I miss my friends. HMMMMM. I never thought I would miss my ex boyfriend this much but he was my best friend for a long time and it would be nice if he was here so I could escape from all the petty college stuff. like frat parties where the boys are only looking for one thing or the binge drinking (seems like everyone here is obsessed with getting "wasted". It's like the girls in my dorm (which is an all girls dorm) have never tasted a sip of alcohol in their entire teenage lives and now that they've experienced "Frat Parties" they can't get enough. Don't get me wrong. I love partying and the occasional wild nights but then I also believe that frat parties get old. On a different topic. I have a bunch of homework to do. At least I'm getting this done and I'm enjoying it at the moment. It's very relaxing. typing whatever I want. Not having a strict curriculum to follow. I wish I could meet some guys that aren't just interested in sex. That grosses me out. Look. my thoughts are running rampant. But then I also miss things with Travis. But then I don't miss Travis because I'm in Austin. doing whatever I want. in the heart of the city, but then I stayed home last night . a Saturday night and I was in bed. I guess I'm some sort of loser. I almost feel like if I don't party every single night I am like the biggest LOSER UT has ever seen. I need to separate myself from all this Greek B. S. Hmmm. you know what else I need to do. laundry. read Pyschology. Calculus Homework. That's another thing that worries me. The difficulty of my Calculus class. I have already found a tutor and I'm having mass problems with the homework. Oh well. I'll get through it somehow right? I have tutoring tonight at 6. Isn't this little story of my life so interesting. I need like 4 boyfriends at one time like my friend Kim or like 20 activities to do at one time like my friend Geoff. No I really don't need to deal with that stuff actually. I have problems enough worrying about what I should eat in my dorm buffet style dining room or what colors go in what washer for laundry or how much time my Calculus homework will take me (probably 3 hours). WONDERFUL. So much to look forward to. so little time. I need to relax. I need a back massage. I need my mom's cooking and my own bathroom. I won't be getting those things for a long LOOONG time. I have no plans on going home. If I go home my curfew will be midnight. Funny how the parties in Austin don't actually start till midnight. Oh another thing. I hope I make good grades to make my mom happy. She seriously is worried about me and my grades. She probably thinks I'm partying so much which is not the case at all. I think I actually am in my dorm too much. Wait. she is going to get mad because I went shopping and used her credit card. OH LORD. I'll be getting a call in a couple weeks. "LINDSEY. what is this ARDEN B store on my credit card bill? AND why did you spend [ ] amount of money there and why do u need those clothes anyways?" Oh no. Well I have been doing this for 19 min and 11 seconds and it went by pretty fast. And I'm sure whoever reads this will be like "what is this girl talking about?" but that's okay because I'm sure there's a lot of those in the big pile of writing assignment #1's. Well my 20 min are up and I am closing this lovely "stream of consciousness" with my favorite quote just to add a magic touch. ?You will make all kinds of mistakes but as long as you are generous and true and also fierce you will not hurt the world or even seriously distress her. She was made to be wooed and won by youth. ?    ~Winston Churchill