I am sitting at my desk at work. I should be doing other things. I'm angry for having to work today. This should be a day off. I could have taken it off but then I wouldn't get paid. No paid vacation for part time. I am tired even though I got a good amount of sleep last night. I really  shouldn't be tired. I don't feel like going to the gym this afternoon but I wil. I go the gym five days a week and I don't know why. I really don't see any real difference in my body. I started going really to improve myself but I have noticed no change in the several months I've been there. Never the less I still go everyday. I guess I'm just hoping it will pay off. I would really like a nap. Even if i skip the gym and go straight home I can't take a nap. I have homework to do. Not really required home work but reading and prepairing for classes this wek. I am realy trying to stay on top of all my classes this semester. If I slakck off I'll have serious problems in some of my courses. I'm not really sure if this is what I should be writing about. I'm just writing about what I'm thinking about as I sit here tyoing away. The more I think about it these are pretty normal thoughts for me. Most days I am tired and want to skip going to the gym. And most days I still go to the gym. Despite not seeing results I'm not what I would call discouraged. I never think of quiting going to the gym, I just wonder why I see no difference. And everyday I think about all the things I have to do at home that evening. What checks I need to write for bills. I need to write my rent check tonight. I also need to elt my roommates know that the electric and water bill is due soon. I need to change the elevtric and water bil out of my name because I am moving. Thats another thing I have to do when I get home tonight. I havve to start deciding waht I can fir into my new apartment and what I have to store or sell. These are all really basic thoughts for me. I'm always thinking ahead and planning what needs to be done at night or tomorrow or nex week etc. I am very organized, maybe too much if there is such a thing. I dion't really know anyone who is as organized as me. My mother doesn't call me organized she calls me controlling and anal retentive. I prefer organized and in control. I'm not always in control, but she doesn't know that. I don't tell her how out of control I feel in my relationship with my boyfriend. This is also another normal daily thought for me. Why I stay with someone who doesn't feel the same for me as I do for him. Or at least he is not sure. I often wonder if I'm stupid for staying, or is it just him who is tupid because he can't figure out what he wants or what he feels. Maybe its both. Thinkng about how much time I give to my boyfriend and how to limit that time is also a normal daily thought for me, at least lately. I am a planner, I like to know what the plans are for tonight or tomorrow night or the weekend. He doesn't make plans with anyone until that evening arrives. I've gotten to expect that from him but I can't say I've gotten use to it. I wish he would tell me his plans ahead of time but I know that he won't so I'm learining to adapt. I guess it is probaly good for someone like me to be with someone who makes her just relax. I know that everything doesn't have to be planned but for some reason I do try to plan everything I can. Controlling the caos I guess, or to try to control the best I can. I am really out of daily thoughts. I don't know what else to say. writing for twenty minutes straight is hard. My thought are just normal. I am listening to the radio and I don't know this song. Not that it matters I just leave the radio on at work for some background noise. Oh wait, I do know this song. I just didn't recognize it at first. I have a lot of reading to do tonight that I'm not looking forward to. Biology mostly. M developmental calss looks like it will be challenging but possibly very enjoyable. Who am I kidding, by the end of the semester very few classes are enjoyable they are just over and I am always glad just to pass. As orgainsed as I am  I sometimes feel overwhelmed at the beging of the semester trying to get everything organised and figure out what classes to give studying priority to. I usually study first the class I have next. I will fo home and read biology before I read psychology because I have biology tomorrow and psychology is not until wednesday.