I'm thinking I don't know what I'm thinking. its like my mind is still working although I don't know what to write. I wonder how the keyboard  came into invention and why the letters on the board are the way they are. my history class will be more difficult than I anticipated, my instructor really seems to know what he is talking about. I wonder if he's married, I think if he is married he probably has a very attractive wife. I knew a guy at my high school like that, he was sort of feminine but attractive girls were attracted to him, I never understood it. he was friends with the craziest people. terrill had a death wish. he never understood the value of life or he understood it completely and wanted to live it at the very edge. I wonder why the timer isn't working. I thought a timer was counting down when Pennebaker did this site as an example in class. I'll just stop the timer when 20 minutes have elapsed and count it myself since this fucking site is obviously not working. I hate computers. I hate computing. computing is going to be a bad class that I am not looking forward too. UT is a beautiful campus. I like the way all the sidewalks are shady and all the buildings are very rustic looking. I want to get a bike so I can ride to psychology quickly on Mondays because its a pain in the ass walking all the way there and all the way back with nothing to go to before or after. I'm worried about kaitlin. I think she will be fine and not get hurt or killed but I think war might change her in some way. she says she is ready to die for her country but she still has doubts about the validity of the war which could wear down on her morale as she is in a foreign place with strangers. I hope she can find something over there to keep her interest or just keep her going. Iraqi sandspiders are the scariest fucking things I've ever seen in my life. if a sandspider attacked me I would probably try to kill it and then be traumatized for the rest of my life. rishi is making a weird ass noise. like breathing when you are lifting weights or something. brian is my best friend and he almost died. it is very scary to think that someone my age and so close in all aspects of life to me can die. I am 18 and invincible or so I thought. this must change the entire way he views life. don't treat it as something to take for granted. it is definitely a gift and some people just don't understand that. they either die young or never appreciate what they have which is almost worse. I need to get a rug our room is dirty. I'm looking around to spur my thoughts when something goes on for too long. I like the way the window faces north. I can see almost the whole campus and its pretty in the morning. I want to buy a hang glider really really bad. what is my fascination with flight, it must be something deep in my past or the fact that my dad was a pilot I don't know. I hope I didn't choose the wrong career path with the one I have chosen not really offering me much of a chance to fly unless I become moderately rich. I hate that the common man cannot fly his own vessel, even though the commercialization of flight is just about the coolest thing ever. I wonder what sort of experience it takes to becomes someone who works at the airport. that might be a fun job. maybe even just working in the fucking coffee shop would be cool because you get to meet lots of people from all over the world. Austin is a cool city. I think if my job permits me, I would like to stay here for a good portion of my life. I also want to live outside the US for a while. in a country that has ancient cultural significance. maybe Greece or France or Italy. that would be the shit. I feel like stretching. my back always needs to be stretched after I wake up. I wonder why that is. ok so the timer should have reached 20 minutes by now so I will hit submit.