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Visitation dreams, where a deceased loved one appears to you in your sleep, are extremely common and normal—especially if you’ve just suffered the loss and you’re still in mourning. As alarming, confusing, or scary as these dreams can be, it’s important to recognize that this is all a part of the healing process and this is a sign of personal growth. In this article, we’ll take a look at the common underlying meanings of these dreams about a deceased loved one.

Grief

These dreams could be your way of working through feelings of loss. It’s normal to dream about someone you cared about after they’ve passed, especially if you suffered this loss recently. The stages of grief are different for everyone, and you may simply be mourning in your sleep.
If you feel like you need help working through your loss, there’s nothing wrong with getting some help. Reach out to a grief counselor or contact a therapist. They’ll help you process what happened and give you the coping skills you need to start healing.

Guidance

The dream may be your way of sorting out a problem. If you’re working through a difficult situation or you’re faced with a task, this could be your subconscious’s way of giving you advice—especially if the person you’re dreaming about was a mentor to you. Consider the context of the dream and what the person was doing when you envisioned them.

This is especially likely to be the case if they talk to you. A lost loved one talking to you in a dream is a sign they’re trying to offer you advice or guidance.

For example, if you’re thinking about changing careers but you’re really not sure what you want to do and you dream of your lost one working in a job they never had when they were alive, it may be a sign you’re ready for a change.

Time to Move On

If the dream was positive, it could just signify you’ve found closure. Do you feel a sense of calm and peace washing over you when you look back on how you felt about the dream? If so, the person in your dreams may be a sign that you’re finally getting over the loss. Don’t double-guess yourself. If you have positive feelings about this, respect what your emotions are telling you.

If you’re seeing a dead person happy in your dream but you feel sad when you wake up, think of it as their way of saying, “It’s alright. I want you to be happy.”
These dreams may feature passed spouses or close friends and family. These losses often take the longest to move on from.

Fear of Death

If the visitation has you spooked, perhaps it’s a natural fear of death. Everybody thinks about their own mortality from time to time, and if you’ve just experienced the loss of a loved one, it makes sense for your subconscious to link your nervousness about death to a recent loss. If this is the case, your dream is just a reflection of your personal anxiety.
An odd number of these dreams feature telephones. Perhaps the telephone is a metaphor for speaking from “the other side” or a faraway place you can’t visit yet? If a phone featured prominently in this dream, it’s almost positively a dream about death.

New Beginnings

Dreaming of a passed loved one can mean you’re starting a new phase. Your loved one showing up in your dream can represent the past. They aren’t around anymore, so they’re a symbol of a past version of yourself. If you’re on the precipice of a new path or a fresh move, this dream could be your body’s way of letting you know you’re ready to say goodbye to the past.

If you’re on the fence about making a big change, think about how the dream made you feel. If you feel scared or nervous, maybe it’s not the right time. If you wake up feeling refreshed, you’re ready.
If you’ve been considering moving to a new city for a fresh start, perhaps now is the right time to start packing your bags.
Maybe you’re thinking about going back to school or applying for a new job. These dreams could be the sign you’re ready!

Guilt

If you feel like you let the loved one down in life, this could be regret. If the person you lost always wanted to go on vacation with you and the two of you never found a time to make it work, you might express that guilt in a dream by walking with them on a beach. This is just your spirit’s way of learning to let go over time. Everyone has regrets about the past, and learning to let go and move can take time.
Try to overcome your feelings of guilt. No relationship will be 100% regret-free, and everybody makes mistakes. It’s all in the past now, and holding on to it won’t do you any good.

Nostalgia

This dream may just be a way to remember the good times. Everybody loves remembering all of the fun and joy they’ve had in the past. If your dream even slightly resembles something you and the loved one did in real life, this is just your way of remembering the happy times.

Look at this as your loved one’s way of visiting you in your sleep! You two may not be able to make any new memories together, but you can always have the moments you shared in the past.
Nostalgic, warm dreams often feature passed friends or close family members you associate with fun.

Healing

Dreaming of a lost loved one may indicate you’re ready to say goodbye. It’s healthy to acknowledge past pain, accept it, and grow. There’s no shame in being sad about losing your loved one, and these dreams may be a natural part of moving on. You have nothing to feel bad about or question here. You’re doing everything you should be.
If you’re dreaming of a dead person being alive, your dream may symbolize that your feelings towards that person are fully resolved and you forgive yourself for any mistakes you’ve made.

Mixed Feelings

The paradox of the dead coming to life may signal conflicted feelings. If you’re feeling kind of mixed up or lost, this might be a metaphor for how unsure you are. This is especially likely to be the case if your dream is jumbled, abstract, or confusing—it’s probably a reflection of your mixed emotional state.

For example, if you aren’t sure whether you’re mad at the person you lost for leaving you or if you’re happy they’re finally at peace, your dreams may have some convoluted emotional textures to them.
This is why seeing a dead person in a dream isn’t automatically a good or bad thing. These kind of dreams can carry a lot of conflicting (or even paradoxical) emotions.