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 are under our control and those that are
outside our control Epictetus one of the
most influential stoic figures
highlights this notion by stating
freedom is the power to choose we find
this freedom in the ability to choose
how we respond to the reality around us
not in trying to control the actions or
words of others
those who enjoy spreading rumors or
negativity frequently struggle with
insecurity or
jealousy their preoccupation with
negativity often due to these underlying
feelings can potentially be a
devastating factor in such
relationships they may try to set you
apart by spreading rumors or drawing
attention to imperfections they detect
in you this will create a sense of
division and undermine trust among your
social groups these individuals are
unlikely to offer accurate assistance as
they prioritize building negative
relationships over nurturing positive
ones the stoics recommend that we
surround ourselves with uplifting and
inspiring people who celebrate our
accomplishments and provide support when
we are going through difficult times we
cultivate connections with people who
exemplify good attributes to establish
supportive and uplifting
environments directing attention to the
suitable components under our control
such as our thoughts words and actions
enhances our ability to manage adverse
situations more
resiliently imagine a scenario in which
someone spreads rumors about a buddy
they both have in common based on the
stoic notion of The Duality of control
it is essential to recognize that this
is an attempt to establish Discord we
cannot influence the behavior of the
individual spreading stories but we can
determine how we will react to them
taking a stoic attitude would entail
respectfully declining to participate in
the negative discourse and Shifting the
focus of the discussion to something
more positive by consciously deciding to
abstain from gossiping we Safeguard our
emotional well-being and prevent
ourselves from contributing to the
propagation of
negativity stoic philosophy in its most
fundamental form provides us with the
means to build an atmosphere that is
more uplifting and
Serene we Empower ourselves to negotiate
the problems of interpersonal
relationships and to develop a Social
Circle that supports our growth and
well-being by concentrating on
cultivating good connections making the
conscious decision not to participate in
negativity and directing our attention
toward Parts under our
control number six the siren song of
flattery reason and discernment are
fundamental to the stoic philosophy
enabling us to Traverse everyday social
relationships intricacies
successfully Marcus Aurelius a notable
stoic scholar and Roman Emperor advises
us not to waste more time fighting over
what a decent man should be even though
compliments can be a lovely
confirmation excessive flattery like a
siren's tempting call can lead us
towards the possibility of
manipulation the cultivation of stoic
judgment is the necessary step to
navigate this social hurdle
successfully take for example a new
co-worker who lavishes you with gushing
Praise on your job
to the point where their remarks appear
exaggerated they may praise your
Brilliance referring to you as a genius
or a prodigy without considering the
specifics of your achievements or the
amount of effort that has gone into them
those with hidden agendas may use this
excessive flattery as a warning sign
they aim to win your trust or take
advantage of your kindness as the stoics
envisioned them genuine compliments a
particular and praise the qualities that
you possess that are most admirable it
is possible for an authentic compliment
to emphasize a specific ability you
demonstrated in your work or to
appreciate the attention and effort you
put into a project the genuine and
uplifting nature of these comments helps
to cultivate a sense of Pride and
success in the
recipient to distinguish between genuine
praise and manipulative flattery one
must apply stoic reason is this
compliment unique and authentic or
general and
exaggerated does the person praising me
appear to have a hidden goal or do they
seem to be genuinely interested in the
job that I have done by utilizing our
rational faculties and carefully
observing the other individual's actions
we may peel back the layers of flattery
and discover the genuine intention
beneath their
words living a good life and acting with
Integrity were essential tenets of the
stoic
philosophy therefore this also applies
to the way we connect with other people
we can avoid succumbing to the Allure of
flattery by implementing these Concepts
and honing our discernment skills we can
recognize deceptive strategies for what
they are while also learning to
appreciate genuine praise as a result we
may build stronger and more meaningful
relationships based on authenticity and
respect for one
another number seven diminishing your
light there is a strong emphasis in the
stoic philosophy on the significance of
acknowledging and appreciating one's
intrinsic value epicus a legendary
character in The stoic philosophy is
credit as saying it is not that we have
a short time to live rather it is that
we waste a lot of it life provides ample
time and sufficient money for our most
significant accomplishments as long as
we invest
beneficially because of this firm