Please revise this to sound more personal, flow better, and conclude well. Provide comments regarding changes made and changes that should be made to improve this personal statement for medical school: Glancing up from my blood pressure screening station, I noticed an elderly Chinese woman, Ms. Wu, who appeared anxious, fearful, and confused. I stood up and guided her to where I was working. Using a translated vocabulary sheet, I explained that I would be measuring her blood pressure, and the procedure would be painless. I informed her I was going to tell her what I was going to do each step of the way, and as I guided her through the process and explained her results, she became more at ease and comfortable. After discussing her results, I provided her with a pamphlet translated into Chinese regarding hypertension and a list of low cost clinics in the surrounding area, both of which I helped create, ensuring she had access to further information if needed. She appeared relieved and glad to have received these resources and thanked me for my time and assistance. This gratifying experience served as a reminder of the profound impact of assisting those in need and helped me recall why I decided to become a doctor in the first place.
During the summer of my sophomore year of high school, I embarked on a ten-day trip to a leadership conference that introduced me to the field of medicine, filled with activities that provided glimpses of what it would take to become a physician. My exposure to medicine was limited prior to this event, but this experience introduced me to the harsh realities faced by healthcare professionals, especially when handling disturbing and life-threatening medical conditions in underserved communities. Holding a brain and spinal cord helped pique my curiosity and initiate and solidify my determination to pursue a career in medicine. Although I was frequently reminded that the process would be arduous, I hoped to as a physician to do what’s right, regardless of how challenging that may be.
	As a result, I decided to pursue lifeguarding in my remaining high school years with training from the American Red Cross (ARC), learning emergency lifesaving techniques such as CPR that was practiced bimonthly to help maintain my skills. Consequently, I decided to volunteer with ARC in college, which exposed me to the Community Emergency Response Team (CERT), an organization that trains and certifies volunteers to help respond to disasters and educate community members about disaster preparedness.
	Despite becoming certified, my involvement was immediately limited with the onset of the Covid-19 pandemic. The lack of activities and interest to take an online course during this time caused many members to leave and no new ones to join.  As a result, when schools returned to in-person activities, it was difficult to garner interest through hosting events due to limited manpower. Consequently, along with two other members, our group worked tirelessly to host a disaster preparedness fair in the campus plaza, gathering funds, securing materials, and collaborating with the LA Fire Department to prepare and demonstrate activities such as making paracord bracelets, planning home fire escape routes, and box cribbing, a technique used to lift heavy objects during earthquakes. 
	When presenting on the … I realized the importance of community engagement to community -> cycling
One arena in which I discovered the importance of supporting a community was my involvement in cycling. Although I joined the UCLA Cycling Club and started riding seriously only two years ago, I have formed meaningful connections with people from various backgrounds and cultures. Through my cycling journey, I have learned and taught others how to properly prepare, fuel, and train to become a better cyclist, while also advocating for safety and wellness as the safety officer of the club. 
On a particularly challenging training ride, I looked behind me and noticed a girl on her bike, struggling to keep up with the rest of the group. Unfortunately, she had run out of water and carbohydrates. Separating us from the rest of the group, I slowed down to offer her food and water. As she took time to consume the much needed nutrients, we both slowed even more, but it was better that both of us were there than to have her struggling alone. As I proceed to catch up to the main group, I keep checking to ensure she was still close behind me, accelerating at a steadily increasing pace to ensure [synonym] we eventually return to the group but do not tire her out too much. Once we make it back to the group and eventually complete our 100-mile ride of the day, she approaches me and thanks me for supporting her when others were too exhausted to notice.
Since then, my collegiate cycling career has taken a positive turn. After tirelessly training for a good part of 2 years, I was able to go from placing nearly last in ym first race to second in my most recent one.
This experience left me feeling gratified [synonym] and excited about my ability to make a positive impact on someone’s life. I gained a deeper appreciation for the role of communication in fostering trust between patients and healthcare providers. I also learned that overcoming language and cultural barriers allows for more meaningful connections, as evidenced by my interaction with Ms. Wu. This encounter solidified my desire to become a physician, empowering me to directly contribute to patients’ well being and community-wide healthcare improvements. I recognized the importance of equipping patients with knowledge, tools, and resources for informed decision making, strengthening my passion for preventive care and health education. In assisting Ms. Wu, I realized that medicine is a continually evolving field, and I must also grow and learn from my experiences to better serve patients in the future. This experience inspired me to further explore healthcare barriers faced by the AAPI community and seek ways to lower these obstacles, reaffirming my commitment to making a difference in the lives of others through pursuing a career in medicine.