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Assistant: Title: F1 as family
        Author: justmeee2603 justmeee2603 
        Chapter: 1/3 
        Summary: Here’s a collection of one shots, most of them will be between 1k and 5k. Every chapter is a new fic.Warning, rating, tags and summary will be at the beginning of each chapter. This collection will continue as long as I write them.I take prompts/suggestions I’ll write them if they inspire me so don’t hesitate the ask for something :)DISCLAIMER: THESE FICTIONS ARE RPF THIS IS YOUR ONLY WARING be kind <3Love -L
        Contents: Chapter 1: You drew stars around my scars
    

    


  

  
  
    
    -Oscar- The start of the season was bad, everyone on the team knew that. But weekend after weekend, progressions were made, and the car was finally living up to its name. Oscar was enjoying every moment, no matter if he was winning or losing, he was happy to race, although he preferred wining. Each race, he drove like it would be the last time, the last corner or the last pit stop. He wore his orange team wear proudly, like it would be taken away from him and read the articles saying he was going to be rookie of the year like it was the last time he’ll want to see his name on the front page. Enjoying them like it was the last… He smiled though the boring meetings, the annoying interviews, the exhausting gym sessions and the sore feeling left in his body after. All of that made him love every second fully, not taking anything for granted. Perhaps it wasn’t, not for him at least, he was walking on thin ice, and he knew that. There was the fact that almost no driver had a saved seat and that if they didn’t deliver good enough results, they would be ejected. The poor Nick didn’t have much time. But for Oscar, there was another knife he had to dodge, he couldn’t like Lando, just drive and he could stay in the team. No, the Aussie had to be extremely cautious, to a point of hyper vigilance, because if someone found out… He didn’t even want to think about it… Everything, his ambitions, his dreams would all be crunched. They’ll come at him, eat him alive in the media and he’ll have to quit, or they’ll make him. Oscar was trans, had come out to his family ages ago, he started testosterone at 18 and had top surgery a few months after his 19th birthday. He wasn’t ashamed of it, but he didn’t feel like changing the world and becoming the first transgender formula 1 driver, he hadn’t Lewis’ courage to be an activist, so nobody knew. Well, Mark knew since he was his manager, he knew that Webber told Andrea before he joined McLaren, but the Italian was more focused on ‘if the kid could drive’. Oscar doesn’t really know if Stella understood what he was trying to say but he didn’t want to question it, he got in the team and that’s all that mattered. They had many appointments with his doctor to make sure that his level of testosterone and hormones in general were the same as a cis man, so that he could pass any drug tests he had to take. He envied the other drivers, how they could just hook up with someone without ending their career, the way they could be sh@tless or just dry the sweat on their forehead with their shirt without scars showing, the way they didn’t have to worry… Some days were better than others and he could live his life without trouble. But once in a while he’d focus too much on the feminine aspects of his body, the gender dysphoria would kick in and it’s like he couldn’t bear existing anymore, wanting to tear his skin off. He learned over the years, when he feels like that, there’s not much he can do, so he just stays in bed and tries to distract himself from having panic attacks. Then he’ll fall asleep and hope for the thoughts to be gone in the morning. On the bad days he never felt like seeing anyone, he’d gost every human being on earth. Mark and he had an unspoken arrangement where he would text him that he felt sick in these exact same words, and he’d try to clear his agenda for the day. Fortunately, that never happened on a race weekend.    It was the last race before summer break and Oscar was floating on a cloud, he had finished the sprint race second and eared his first podium in F1, even though it wasn’t a Grand Prix he was still proud. He was in his driver’s room, shirtless, just after his shower, putting some cream on the healed red scars on his chest. Mark had put the bag containing his shot, some sanitiser, a bandage and a needle in the bathroom. Since moving out, he had learned how to give himself his monthly dose of testosterone for practical reasons. He was done, holding the syringe in his month, putting some pressure on where he just pocked himself when… “Oscar! Congratulations, mate you really…” Lando who had just come into the room to froze in front of him. The moment of silence that seemed like hours of the two of them just staring at each other got interrupted by Oscar smashing the bathroom’s door closed in Lando’s face with his foot, getting a little scream out. The Aussie couldn’t move, panic growing inside of him as realisation hit. He heard Lando walking out and closing the door. He was f@ck@d, he didn’t lock the room and now he had to deal with the consequences. It was around midnight, he was having another panic attack and felt like he was going to pass out when he texted the only person he could think about. 
  Oscar 11:48pm

  Help

  Room 342

   

  Logan 11:51

  Omw

   
 The American was the only person on the grid to know, the two of them became friends F2 and the fact that both of them were rookies pushed them closer together this year. His mom had advised him to come out to someone who would be travelling with him for support, he had told Logan towards the end of their formula 2 career, when it was announced that they were promoted to F1. He took it well, swore to keep his secret to the grave and gave him his number for ‘if you ever need someone that knows’. He heard the knocking on his door, Williams was staying in the same hotel so he knew he wouldn’t be too far away. He took a glimpse of his reflection before opening for his friend, his eyes were red, and his hair were a mess. Logan was in his team’s wear and slowly caching his breath. “You… you, okay?” He got in and when he did get an answer, just Oscar with tears in his eyes, he took the Aussie in his arms for a hug. Oscar held him tightly like he would fall if he didn’t, tears socking his friend’s shirt. He was shaking, desperately trying to slow his breathing down. “Oscar, you’re okay, breath with me…” With they took slow and deep breath together until the younger could form a sentence. “Lando… He walked in… I was giving myself my shot, and I was shirtless… He found out, I’m screwed, it’s over…” He looked like he shattered into pieces and was now tying not cut himself while picking up was left of him. “Did he say anything?” “No, I slammed the door into his face, and he walked out…” Logan sighed out of relief. “Okay… He might, be okay with it, you don’t know that.” He tried to bring back hope in his friend’s mind. “Logan… don’t do that… We both know I’m done.” Oscar said, forcing a sad smile on his face, the tears rolling down his cheeks. After negotiating some comforting cuddles, the American finally got him to go to bed because he still had to race the day after.  -Lando- The door came slamming a few centimetres away from his face, he didn’t say anything, did not even blinked and walked back to his driver’s room, shocked. Out of everything the word had made him seen, he did not expect that. At first, he thought that Oscar was doing steroids or some other drugs. But Lando was good at reading people, or at least he thought so, and it didn’t fit. Then playing the scene back in his head, he saw the scars, two healed surgery scars sitting on his chest, starting from his sides almost joining each other on his sternum. And it clicked, technically speaking his teammate was doing steroids, but not for the obvious reason. When he was founding out that he might not be straight, he did some reading, manly about bisexuality but at some point, he got lost and read about the community in general. He didn’t really know what to say or how to make Oscar feel like it was okay and that he wouldn’t tell a soul. He wondered if anyone else knew, the team, other drivers? He didn’t have to think too much to guess that the FIA wasn’t aware. He wanted to speak to him, though after a while of waiting and people wondering what he was doing, he thought that maybe, Oscar didn’t want to see him. So, he left for his hotel room. Lando was on his hotel bed and was desperate for some advice, he was cursing his friend group made out straight, cis man. He tried texting him, but he was too late, and his number had already been blocked so any hope of sending a nice, supportive text was out of the question. He figured out to give his teammate some time and try to clear things out on Sunday after a night of sleep. He learned early that morning that it was going to more complicated than he thought, Oscar was avoiding him and the few situation in which they were together, they weren’t alone. The fact that he couldn’t even look at him in the eyes was what hurt the most. The Aussie looked tired, his eyes red and swollen indicating that he had spent hours crying. Lando felt the urge to protect him, hug him tightly, whispering that his secret was safe with him and that he would literally harm anyone who wouldn’t let Oscar race for it if it somehow got out. The day went on as planned but the silence was excruciating, for both of them. The driver’s parade almost topped Miami introduction in term out awkwardness and the restricted space in the car was uncomfortable. The race was difficult for Lando who was going up and down the rank on whether if it was raining or not and Oscar, well Oscar had to retire the car to after Carlos pushed him into the wall. They had a lot of expectations after how the last weekends went and the results weren’t there that weekend. Lando didn’t see his teammate after the race, only caught a glimpse of him during an interview. After all the media duties he knocked on his driver’s room door. “Oscar, can we talk?” The words were hard to find, he waited but got no answer. “Oscar, I know you’re in there, please…?” Lando was right, behind the door was the Aussie nervously starting at the handle wondering if he should open, he didn’t he stayed like this until he heard the other walk off. “Okay… I’ll leave you be… Have a good holiday.”  -Oscar- Oscar went back to his apartment in Monaco, and spent the most of his time either sleeping or stressing before loading the news in case it got out. He was emotionally tired and no amount of sleep seemed to help his case. He tried distracting himself, but it didn’t do much, he was still biting his nails and scratching the skin off his hands nervously. He was spiralling and he knew that, he hadn’t taken care of his scars in three days and was only eating deliveries, not having the energy to cook. He was getting up to get the food that knocked at his door but instead of someone from the building holding a delivery bag, he saw Lando. Oscar panicked, tried to slam the door again but this time his teammate put his foot to block it. They both looked surprised at the action and looked at each other. “No, you’re not doing that, not again. We are talking and you’re not getting out of it.” Was what the Brit said as he pushed the door open to get in the apartment. Oscar was stunned, Lando was usually the one who would run away from any serious conversation but now he was the one that felt like running. He took a deep breath and closed the door behind him. He followed the older man to the living room. Lando sat on the couch and gesture for him to the same. After a few seconds of silence, he started talking. “Oscar… I don’t care if you’re trans, I don’t care if you’re gay, you could have a third eye for all that matter. I care about you, you’re a great driver, one day you will be the best and it’s no right of mine to take that away from you even if that means I have to smash my head against the pavement until I forget the past two weeks for god’s sake! If anything, I’m offended you didn’t tell me, like you thought I would out you or something, God no, I’m not a monster…” Oscar mouth opened then closed again in chock, he was not expecting that. “Plus, you look like you had the worst week of your life. Jesus, look at your hands.” He grabbed his hands; he was right he looked like a mess and his hands were a reflection on how he had been feeling on the inside. “Come on, let me patch you up.” Lando dragged him to the bathroom opened the cabinet and started cleaning his hands with a wet cloth. They stayed like that in a comfortable silence whist he bandaged his hands after putting some healing cream on them. When he has done, he looked at him with the sweetest smile. “You wanna, talk it, maybe?” “Thanks” Was all he could get out. “I don’t know what to say…” He looked to Lando who was sitting on the bathtub. “Can I ask you something?” he asked, and Oscar nodded. “Who knows?” “My family, Webber, maybe Stella but I’m not sure, Logan and well now you… You’re not going tell, right?” The Aussie asked, still unsure was scratching his hand through the bandage. “God no! Don’t insult me like that…” Lando faked an offended look on his face. “You know what? Let’s make a deal, you told me your secret, well didn’t tell me but, I tell you one.” “Lando, you don’t have to…” “Hush” He interrupted. “I want to.” He grabbed his hand so that Oscar would stop hurting himself. “If it makes you feel better, I will… I’m bi.” The Aussie tested the water. “Bi…?” “Sexual, and by myself technically also, but that’s not what I wanted to say” They laughed and the younger looked way more relaxed. “Does that make McLaren the gayest team on the grid?” Their moment got interrupted by the the actual food this time. They shared the pizza and watched a movie, when Oscar realised that Lando fell asleep on his shoulder he grabbed his phone and texted Logan. 
  Oscar 3:12pm

  Lando barged in my apartment and we talked

  He’s cool with it :) 

   

  Logan 3:13pm

  Told you…

    Is he still at your place?

   

  Oscar 3:13pm

  Yeah
   he’s asleep on my shoulder

  We were watching a movie

   

  Logan 3:14pm

  Cute :)

  Did anything else happened…?

   

  Oscar 3:14pm

  ?

  What else?

   

  Logan 3:14pm

  Nothing…

  We’ll have this conversation in a few weeks…

   
Oscar rolled his eyes then looked at Lando. His eyes were closed, and he had a curl falling on his temple, he looked angelic, maybe a little too much.  -Lando- It took some time for Lando to realise where he was when he woke up. He was laying on Oscar’s couch, the man was on to top of him, his head resting on his chest and a leg between Lando’s. The Aussie was holding onto him like a baby koala. Saying that their position did nothing to him would be a lie, he was blushing and unsuccessfully trying not to smile. The butterflies in his stomach flying in all direction, he couldn’t resist putting the hair that was in front of Oscar’s face behind his ear. He opened his eyes and looked up smiling. “Hi” He was so adorable Lando felt like he was melting. When the younger awoke a bit more and realised their position he started moving and apologising. “Hey, don’t apologise, you looked cute…” Oscar chuckled and sat up. “I’m going to take a shower, can you redo my bandage after?” Lando simply nodded. He got out of the shower wearing an oversized t-shirt and some sport short, his hair still socked were pulled back. The Brit zoned out on the view and got bring back to earth. “Lando? You’re okay?” Oscar showed genuine concern, that made him laugh. “Sorry, come here.” His hands looked already way better than before, he repeated the process and secured the bandage with a piece of tape. “And… done! I should go, it’s getting dark, but we should definitely hang out more…” The younger answered with a smile and a nod and walked Lando to the door. “Thanks for everything” He put his shoes on and walk out. “I’ll text you if you unblock me…” “Sorry about that, I will, goodnight.” Lando wished him a good night and left.  -Oscar- Oscar unblocked Lando, a week went by before he couldn’t resist texting him again. 
  Oscar 10:22am

  Hey

  I was wondering if you would go to the cinema with me?

  People keep recommending for me to see ‘Barbie’ but didn’t have the time…

   

  Lando 10:27am

  Thought you’d never ask 
  ;)

  What time?

   

  Oscar 10:27am 

  5pm my place

  The cinema is 5min away by foot

   

  Lando 10:28am

  Sure see you :)

   

   
Oscar kicked his feet in exitment, he went through his closet to see if he could find something pink to wear. After about ten minutes of overthinking, he settled for a pink t-shirt nod a light blue denim short. He spent the day cleaning his apartment and trying to contain himself, with not much success. He almost ran at the door and he heard the bell. “Hey” Lando was stranding at his door, he was wearing blue converse, a pink sweatpants, a pink jacket who was open enough for the young man to see that he was wearing a blue cropped top underneath. Oscar tried not staring, but we was only a man and you could see the Brit’s boxer elastic under his pants. What he did manage to do is keep his mouth closed, thankfully. “We’re matching!” Lando said exited. The Aussie laughed, grabbed his bag and locked his door. They walked to the cinema in a comfortable silence before Lando said he brought snacks because the one at the counter were always too expensive. “Are you serious? Do you know that you could literally buy the cinema with a year’s salary if you wanted to?” Oscar was laughing so hard he had trouble walking straight. “Yeah I know, but I’ve been doing it for as long as I can remember. What can I say, old habits die hard…” “Sure whatever you say… I have to go to the pharmacy though, it’s on the way don’t worry.” They walked in a small shop a few meters later, Oscar gave the lady at the counter a piece of paper and his ID, she came back with a few boxes that he shoved in his bag. He wished the women a nice day and continued on the sidewalk. “It’s my shot.” The younger stated when he saw the questioning look in Lando’s eyes. “Sorry I didn’t mean to stare…” Oscar reassured that it was fine, and they arrived at the cinema. They got their tickets and found a place to sit. The movie was great, it hit close to home for Oscar. He had experienced what it was like to be teenager in a women’s body in this world before he transitioned, and realised how different people treated him now that they assumed he was a cis man. The end was the best but also the worst somehow, the speech made tears roll down his cheeks with a smile on his face. Lando was touched, he held his hand rubbing his thumb on Oscar’s skin in comfort and when the lights came back on as the credits were rolling, he dried the younger’s tears with the sleeve of his jacket. “Oh god” Oscar sighed. “I’m sorry, that was, wow…” Lando shook his head, a smile on his lips. “Don’t apologise, that’s exactly what I was made for…” That sentence and its reference to the heart-breaking song at the end, got another sob out of him. “Come on let’s go get ice cream, you’ll feel better.” They got up and walked out, still holding hands. They went back to Oscar’s flat and ate the ice cream in a bowl. They talked about the movie, how it was one of the best they ever watched and will recommend it to everyone they know. The Aussie was putting the dishes away when his phone rang. “Could you check who is it?” He yelled out of the kitchen. Lando checked the phone next to him. “Umm… It’s an alarm, the name is the syringe emoji…” He yelled back. “Oh yeah right… I have to take my shot, I’ll be right back, it would only take a second.” “Do… Do you need a hand?” The Bits words got out before he could think, he didn’t want to overstep, and he hated needles. “Sure, I could use a third hand.” Oscar said unbothered. He took off he shirt, making Lando swear internally, got out the different boxes out of his bag and got out the needle. He did the process with ease asking the older man to hold the shot after he was done with it. He got the bubbles out of the syringe, pinched his stomach and slowly punched the liquid out. Lando was mortified at the lack of expression on his teammates face. “How are you so calm?!” “I’ve been doing the same thing for the past four years every month, I got used to it…” He answered whist putting the needle in a bright red and yellow trash that seemed to be made for it. While he was at it, he grabbed the healing cream and applied it on his scars. “I came out at fifteen, started T at 18 and got the surgery just before going in F2.” “I don’t think I could ever get used to stabbing myself every month…” “Meh… Period cramps were worse anyway.” Lando was a lost man, whether it was it Oscar’s hair, hands or body he didn’t really know but he was staring. “Enjoying the view?” Lando’s eyes went wide, he cleared his throat. “Ahem… Sorry I didn’t, I wasn’t staring in a bad way… I was…” What he was doing, was desperately trying to justify himself and Oscar was making fun of it. “Oh, were you…?” He took a step forward and Lando took a step back hitting the wall with his back, panic still in his eyes. “So, you were staring, in a good way?” He said a smirk on his face, clearly enjoying his moment. “I… maybe…?” Oscar took another step making their bodies dangerously close to one another. “Is that okay?” Lando questioned, his cheeks were red, and his mind started thinking inappropriately. “I don’t know… Is that okay?” The Aussie grabbed his jaw with a hand, they were so close that they could feel the others breathe on their mouths. Lando nodded like his life depended on it, he got him closer to him by putting his hand on the back of his neck. That was all the confirmation Oscar needed before crashing his lips on Lando’s.  Lando kissed shyly, not sure of the boundaries, but holding tightly like he’d leave. Oscar kissed with passion and need like he’d been waiting for it all week, perhaps he had. The Brit took the lead, switched their positions, pinned Oscar on the wall and took advantage of the surprise to slip his tongue inside his lover’s mouth. The younger felt like his legs were going to betray him or pass out or explode, maybe all of the above. They broke the kiss due to a need for oxygen. “God…” Oscar said out of breath, and words. “No, just Lando is fine…” He spoke chuckling at his own joke. He received a little slap. “Seriously?” He was also laughing, resting his forehead on Lando’s. They kissed again and Lando pulled away this time. “Please put a shit on before I get…” He looked down implicitly. “Oh! My bad… sure I’ll…” Oscar was trying to hide his amusement; he was bad at it. He put his shirt back on, blushing. “Please don’t apologise, I just thought that you might need to take me on a few dates first…” the Brit suggested. “I’ll see what I can do about that… In the meantime, do you want to eat?” Oscar said then regretted his choice of words when he saw Lando trying not to smile. “Pasta Lando, pasta! Oh my god what am I gonna do with you?” “Sorry, yes pasta sounds good.” They sat down to eat dinner together Oscar getting lost in his lover’s eyes. Lando left reluctantly after promising him to take him to dinner the day after at 7pm. They kissed one last time and he went back home. The Aussie took his phone and texted Logan. 
   
 -Lando- Lando was incapable to focus on anything other than his date later that night. It was 11am, he already called the restaurant to reserve a table, chosen his outfit and ironed it. He decided to watch a marvel movie to distract himself when he looked at the time twice in the same minute. As the sun was setting, he took another shower and dressed up. Lando wore some black trousers and a dark bottom down shirt. He was still early and stared at the wall for ten minutes then left. He drove to Oscar’s apartment and text him, not wanting to park. The Aussie responded in a tenth of a second and made his way outside. At his sight, Lando forgot how to breathe and stand and held on to his car for support. Oscar was dressed in a white shirt, black pants and wore a pair of sneakers. As soon as he saw his lover his eyes lit up and he got exited he almost ran to him. He stoped in front of him, and they stood there in silence a few seconds, getting lost in each other’s eyes. “You look amazing…” Lando started, an adoring gaze on the younger man. “Could say the same about you.” The Brit opened the passenger door and delicately closed it behind him. He got into the car and turned the engine on. “Where are we going?” “An Italian restaurant up the hill.” They drove for fifteen minutes to arrive in front of a fancy restaurant. A valet exchanged the keys for a little number card, and they walked in. Lando gave the name for the table and a waitress walked them to a table in the back, Oscar wondered if he especially asked for a table in a more private location but either way, he was glad. “I didn’t know about this place, it’s nice thank you.” The Brit responded by a smile. They spent the first few minutes just getting lost in the other’s eyes, not talking. Their moment got interrupted by a waiter asking what they’d like to drink. They ordered the food and ate. They discussed life, racing, identity and so much more that the restaurant almost had to kick them out to close. They got back in the car Lando holding the steering wheel but not starting the engine. “Do you-” “I kinda-” They both started at the same time. “Sorry, you go first.” Lando let him. “I was wondering if you’d like to match a movie and like cuddle back at my place…” Oscar said so quickly that the Brit almost didn’t understand it, the shade of his cheeks were matching his lips. “I’d love to…” Was all his lover managed to say before capturing his lips. They spent the drive brainstorming what they could watch and when they agreed on a movie they were already pulling in front of Oscar’s building. After he lend Lando some more comfortable clothes they didn’t last long before falling asleep, cuddled against the other. The two lover birds got awoken by the sun since they didn’t close the blinds that night. “I could wake up like that every day of my life…” The older said in morning voice. They were in the same position as last time, only switched positions, he was using Oscar’s chest as a pillow. The Aussie hummed positively, eyes half open. Lando sat up grabbed a pen that was sitting on the bedside table, leaned in and kiss Oscar on the forehead. His wrist was sitting on top of Oscar’s heart. “Can I?” He asked to which the younger agreed, not really knowing hat he was about to do but trusting him. The Brit got back to lying next to him, opened the pen and started drawing little stars around his scars. Oscar felt like he could start crying, he didn’t know what he did to deserve him, but hell he would never let go.'
User: Summarize the chapter based on the content provided, ensuring to follow the set format and emphasize key aspects within the specified length.
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