Look at this style of Sidemen story telling. Develop a prompt that instructs an LLM to learn this style of story telling. We would use some of these transcrpts as examples: 

Transcript

0:00

- Hello, and welcome to what is one of the most requested Sidemen Sundays of this year.

0:06

We've done our first holiday video, we have done our road trip, and now we do the holiday again

0:11

but this time we're going abroad (air plane roaring) Now, if you're not familiar with what this concept of video actually is,

0:17

it is very, very simple and I'll explain it to you. I will be spitting the six other guys into two separate teams using a random and lucky wheel app.

0:24

From there, there'll be an Orange team and a Purple team. One of those teams will going on a $20,000

0:29

extravagant luxury holiday, whilst the other team will be left with, a not so extravagant holiday.

0:35

And that is pretty much all you need to know. And then from there, I have planned both of their holidays and they know absolutely nothing.

0:41

They have no idea where they're going, what they are doing and what team they're on. All I know, is they are to meet me at an airport

0:46

and that's what we're going to go now. Hello, welcome. to a nice holiday for y'all.

0:52

- I don't like that. - Oh my God, this is horrible. - But we get quieter and quieter every time, were like.

0:59

- I think ViK and Josh get a nice holiday every time. - We've gotten company (laughs)

1:05

- Once again, the colours have changed, two different teams this time. Got an Orange team

1:11

and a Purple team. - Orange and the Purple team, Orange team. - Just like his Lamborghini.

1:16

- Purple, yeah. I have to be in the Purple team, surely. - Orange team.

1:22

Purple team. Yeah, so Purple this side, Orange this side. Who wants to go first?

1:28

- Yeah I will. - (laughs) Oh, why? - No, no Tobi. - Was he first last time? - No, no, I wasn't.

1:33

- Tobi, I wouldn't know, I wouldn't know. - I'm just staying quiet. - All right. Ethan. Purple team.

1:41

- Purple, Purple. I'm on the Purple team. - JJ.

1:47

- Orange team. - Whoo hoo. - I did. I think I'm happy about that.

1:53

- [Josh] Simon. Purple team. - All right. Let's go. Let's go.

1:58

Purple team, Purple team. - Purple team. - [Josh] Harry. - I'm Orange team right?

2:04

- [Josh] Orange team. (JJ and Curry excited) - Simon and Ethan? - Yes.

2:09

- [Josh] Who do you want? - Wait, what do you mean? - Who do you want? Who do you want? - I don't know, don't do this to me. It's his video.

2:17

- Okay. - No, no we do it both. - I don't want to do, you decide, I didn't.

2:22

- Tobi so we can borrow his, his head thing. - Toby, you go ahead.

2:30

- Let's go boys. - Yeah. Welcome. - This is the day, that my luck changes. Let's go!

2:37

- I'm glad I'm here because if I'm iced, good times. - Statistically you have the worst luck of The Sidemen

2:44

on your team. - [Josh] Orange team, as always don't open anything yet. wait, wait.

2:50

Purple team. - You know, when they say like did you pack your bag yourself? - [Josh] I did, yeah.

2:55

- Technically no. I don't know. - [Josh] It's paper. - [Josh] Purple team.

3:00

- Why have we got package? Oh they've got package? - [Josh] Sidemenclothing.com - Nice. Okay.

3:06

- We've created a school trip herd over here. - Oh Jesus. - Oh, we've done it loud. We've got an audience.

3:14

We got an audience (laughs) - Josh,

3:20

Josh. - Josh. - Did you recognise how Josh saved money on the budget trip, he just brought us on a school trip.

3:25

(crowd chanting) - Oh no (laughs)

3:31

- [Josh] Okay. You lot just go around the other side and open, open number one

3:38

and the white one I'll tell you when it's open. So group chat as always have fun. - Bye team. I hope you have a great time.

3:45

I hope you get the nice place. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, no worries, man. Have a good time too.

3:50

Huh? Huh? Bye. Bye.

3:59

- [Ethan] All right. Have fun. - Yeah. Same mate. - (Sighs) I'm not confident, I'm not confident at all. I'm really not confident. - Really?

4:05

- Wait are you confident? - Yeah. No. Josh is my boy. - Look at how I've managed to be in the good team every time.

4:10

- Yeah, I know, that's what scares me the most. He's going to be like, no, we can't do JJ again. - Yes he can. It's all fair.

4:17

Probability has no... - No memory. - Has no memory. Yeah. That's it.

4:22

(both laughing) - [Harry] God damn it. - He says, well, I'm trying to remember what the fucking clues then. - I think there's a very strong possibility that

4:29

I've been cut here. - [JJ] Really? - I think. - [JJ] No man believe, believe!

4:35

- Positive affirmation - I got the optimism. - Orange team, Orange team, Orange team

4:40

Orange team, Orange team, Orange team. Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Orange team.

4:47

- This is not (laughs) (JJ laughing) - I think we start by trash, 'cause that's what we going to get.

4:54

Hey, holiday. - Welcome to the holiday. - We got trash.

5:02

- Envelope number one. - This is hella thick - It's not going to tell us anything. - This is got to be our boarding passes, right?

5:08

It's just got to be boarding passes. - And it's going to be, to a random country. I mean-- - Depending on the country.

5:15

- It's the easiest check in, it could cork us imagine he goes like, oh thanks for coming to Get way but now you have to hit the road.

5:21

- Oh, my God. - That would be quit funny but also sad. - It is boarding passes. - It's got to be boarding passes.

5:27

- On that paper. - Easy there. - It says, have nice flight, cool Josh when you see it.

5:36

- When you see it? - See it.

5:41

- Oh no, look at the location. Okay. - What did he say?

5:47

- Oh, WhatsApp has been made, Orange team read your boarding passes carefully.

5:54

- My fear is Josh is so excited for this. Like there must be something terrible coming.

6:00

- I don't know. - [Josh] Look at them, go over there. About to find out their destination of where they're heading on holiday.

6:08

I hope it's a good one. - You know what? - What does it say? - He got us here hella early.

6:13

- What time is the flight? - 5 p.m. - No, you're... - You're joking. - When you see it.

6:19

- I think that's what he's talking about. - [JJ] (laughing) Time to open number one.

6:25

- Envelope number one. - [JJ] All right. - Have a nice flight, open envelope two when you land,

6:31

flying from Gatwick to, ooh, we're going to Mulligan boys.

6:37

- Ooh, Ooh. - Ooh, that could be bad. - Were going

6:43

to Alicante. - Ooh. - I'm surprised.

6:48

- I've been there before. - Wait, why is it 5:00 p.m?

6:53

- [Ethan] What? - I've just see why? - What? - I guess there's nothing, isn't it?

6:58

That's the return. - What you said. - I said that, imagine we go back to the another airport.

7:05

So we're flying to Alicante to then come back here, aren't we?

7:12

- It's not marginal, it's not like a totally marginalised place. We have to go to the South terminal.

7:17

- [Ethan] Okay. That's all we know. - That's all we know. - Ah, boys, I'm worried, I'm not going to lie.

7:25

- It's not business class or anything which is a good sign I think. - [Ethan] Okay. - I mean if were put in business. - [Ethan] Yeah yeah, then instantly,

7:30

we're going to go, yeah, yeah, cut. - I told you boys, I told you believe (laughs)

7:37

- [Vik] What do you mean? - Were not flying from here (laughing) - Were far from Heathrow.

7:43

(Simon laughing) - Where are we flying from? - Shut up, shut up, this isn't funny. This isn't funny. - Southern (laughing)

7:49

- Why are we here? (Simon laughing) - That's not even funny. - [Vik] Flight is at 5 p.m?

7:54

- [Simon] Yeah. We have Six hours. I have to go home for a nap. - [Vik] We're supposed to be on holiday.

8:01

- You don't want to read, just like, you know, you got (mumble) (JJ and Tobi laughing) - I'm calling Josh, I'm calling Josh.

8:08

This guy is about to get his fucking neck broken. - [Harry] I'm hoping it'll trip is all those things.

8:15

Friends, happy, time away, tranquillity, memories. They'll definitely be memories, that's for sure.

8:21

- Hello, I'm going to smash your fucking face here. - What do you mean? - Just so you know, be aware yeah,

8:27

when we land back on this trip, I am smashing (Vik laughing)

8:32

I am kicking you into the earth. - Why have you done that? I could have had a fucking a lion.

8:38

- Why am I going to South end? (Josh laughing) Why am I doing that?

8:44

I'm going to kick your chest so far into your back. Yeah. I'm going back to Wessex, so that,

8:49

what you want me to do? Ride the green crocodile ride, whilst there 'cause I've done that when I was five Josh. - You want to do that.

8:55

- Well, we probably have time to me. I mean the flight is at 5:00 p.m. So, do you have anything to say for yourself after this?

9:03

- I have a driver waiting for you, a nice driver, a nice car. - All right, well thanks for easing the pain.

9:09

Thanks for putting lube on my asshole. (Vic and Simon laughing) Bye.

9:14

- Bye. (suspense music)

9:22

- Well, this is a great start to the holiday (laughing) Everyone is just waiting.

9:29

(sensor beeping) - [Simon] Ghetto.

9:34

- [Simon] My thought now he said, I've got you a nice car. - Josh never, never trust Josh. - Do you think

9:41

Yeah but the same thing happened last time we got in a wrong-- - [Simon] That's what I'm saying. - The same thing happened.

9:46

Is it the same thing or is it a double bluff? - What we did the same day again? - I'm thinking the Josh's sick, twisted mind.

9:51

He was like, what's the smallest gesture I could throw them just to get their hopes up

9:56

before they get ruined in Spain. What do mean 5:00 p.m?

10:02

It's ten thirty in the morning! - [Simon] It's 11 to be fair.

10:07

We have six hours. - What in fuck. - How long does it take to get from here to Southern per

10:14

in a car? 63 miles. - How long does that take?

10:19

- An hour and a half. - That's for that. - Were going to be there by half twelve. - It took me a fucking hour to get here.

10:26

- And a gate gate closes at what? - [Simon] Four thirty. - All right come. I'll tell you what, if we are on the shit team,

10:31

we have to meet the most absolutely everything we do. We get to South end as soon as possible. Once the details come off and you know we're going to do?

10:37

no, it isn't that big, okay, I know South end (Simon laughing) We are going to ride the roller coasters,

10:43

we're going to plan the arcade, we might even try and win a Teddy and is before we go to Alicante.

10:49

- [JJ] Wait, did it just get stuck?

10:54

- It's coming, it's going to happen, believe, and you will achieve. - I've lost hope almost.

11:01

- No, no, I think it moved a bit though. - All right. How's holiday going lads? - Very exotic, isn't it?

11:07

- Certainly. (dramatic music) - We just order at Nando's, and we go to for free

11:14

(laughing) random act of kindness. - Well, legend.

11:20

- Okay Simon, when he sent 5:00 p.m I was like, say psych right now. (Simon laughing) I don't like it.

11:25

- Soo annoying, to say 5 p.m, And then I call this out then. - But we ought to have speedy boarded.

11:31

(upbeat music)

11:42

- Okay. So Josh is put in the chat. - [Tobi] Yo, no, no, I don't like that.

11:48

- Wait how does he know where Nando's? Maybe he's just eating Nando's as well. Maybe he's just lurking in the corners.

11:55

Maybe the guy behind, is Josh. (All laughing) Josh?

12:01

- What? (all laughing) - [Vik] All right. This is us, spacious looking promising, would Josh spend this much on

12:09

a team that he's sending to the bin? - Yes. - Yeah. - He did it with a Rolls Royce.

12:14

- I am a bad omen. Someone needs to cleanse me, I don't know what I've done in my life.

12:20

(Vik laughing) (car door closing) I don't know what you're talking about,

12:26

I don't know if I've done anything to deserve this three times in a row, surely not. - Stop, stop, we don't know anything yet.

12:33

We just, maybe the reason it was in the bad teams cause you always a negative. If you were positive, we might be able to good team.

12:39

- So what do you think that if I woke up today and I was happy magically the silvered envelopes would have changed.

12:45

Is that what you're telling me? - (laughing) Potentially? Who knows? - [Tobi] The last supper.

12:51

- Don't say that, don't say that. - The start of something - The start of something new, the classical musical.

12:58

I see you, I see you. - To Malaga. (JJ and Harry screaming)

13:03

(upbeat music)

13:11

- [Simon] What are you thinking? - Nothing really, we are flying at 5 p.m.

13:19

5 p.m? - [Simon] Yes. Yes. We all have a flight. - The flight is two and a half hours, correct? - [Simon] Yes.

13:24

- And we can't tell you who's going to Spain, right? - [Simon] Yes. - So it's an hour ahead, It means that we are landing at 8:30 p.m correct?

13:32

- [Simon] That is correct. - I said this exact same thing (Simon laughing) - Bitch have you read the script.

13:38

(Simon and Vik laughing) We have to travel somewhere from the airport, you may acknowledge - [Simon] Okay.

13:43

- With insider knowledge (laughing) just told us that bad team is coming home tomorrow evening.

13:50

Therefore, I don't see us landing, and getting somewhere at 9.00 p.m.

13:57

- I don't. - Today I go home, the next day, by 8:00 p.m, that means that we'd have 24 hours

14:05

in Alicante. - [Vik] In paradise. - Ah, no, were are on the good team,

14:11

and we'll be going home on Friday. - I hope you're right.

14:17

- Let's go boys. (all laughing) (upbeat music) - To Malaga.

14:23

- [Air Hostess] Do make yourself comfortable. - I can't wait to see the sun. - (laughs) You could see the sun from here.

14:29

- No, I mean, (all laughing) no, see like, the Malaga sun. - Yeah, yeah, it's different than our sun.

14:36

- Yeah (laughing) - If he have booked a flight this late, it's just got to be a good sign.

14:42

- Does it? - Yeah, if were going somewhere bad he wants us to send us there and he wants to see us suffer in it and film it.

14:48

- True. - That's what I feel. - We've got to find out very soon, aren't we? - No turning back now.

14:55

(Harry lip-smacking) (upbeat music)

15:09

- I just had a text from Josh saying, open the next envelope. So number two.

15:17

- Off the camera, yeah, I'll be going ballistic in my head. As your flight is isn't for a while,

15:23

please turn over. - [Vik] Yeah we knew that, - For a list of some things for you to do to pass the time. The driver will be waiting for you,

15:29

so leave your cases in the car, have fun in SouthEnd, but please make sure you have back with the driver at 2:30 p.m.

15:35

- You've called it Ethan. You plan, you plan the next bit of the video as well, SouthEnd. - [Simon] No, no, wait, wait, wait.

15:42

It said, please turn over for things you can do. - Go on one of the rides of adventure.

15:48

(Simon screaming) Play mini golf, ate some seaside snacks, we can do that.

15:54

- I will a hundred percent, I haven't eaten yet. - Oh rock? Remember rock, he was a kid. - Chewing on a rock.

15:59

- Take out your teeth, get the train down the longest pleasure pier in the world. Y'all case.

16:05

Hey Josh, just so you know I've done all of this. Wait, wait, I'm from Essex okay?

16:11

- [Vik] Way before. - Yeah, way before. - Why is this soo sassy? - We're going on the green and crocodile rollercoaster. Please say it's still there, there's no wood, touch wood.

16:18

- [Simon] No man (Vik laughing) - All right, we're going to SouthEnd to have fun, (upbeat music)

16:25

- [JJ] Hey Harry, clap, clap guys we made it (laughing)

16:30

- [Harry] Sony, Malaga Tobi. The are we excited or not? That's the question? The answer is no.

16:37

'Cause, we don't know what's coming. - We're waiting for it to be open or as I said, wouldn't it be funny?

16:42

We ended up flying from Heathrow or different airport or something like what happened?

16:48

Then we saw the flight was from the SouthEnd, I said to Josh on the phone, hey mate, what you want me to do?

16:53

Ride the green crocodile? - [Vik] He doesn't want to ride the green crocodile (laughing) - I have called every step of the way side.

16:59

- [Simon] Okay, sorry but what team are we? - When we open the envelope, I'll be glad they didn't.

17:07

We're going to be on the good team mate. No I just caught some luck mate. - A man of culture (laughing) he knows either. - A man of culture,

17:13

I know mystic Behzinga. - (laughing) mystic Behzinga.

17:19

- And we are, I hate to say it as we're on the good team. - [Simon] So were going to have your first good team experience.

17:25

- I should hope so. I really hope so, if I'm correct bro, I'm going to lose my shit.

17:33

I can't believe, why? (sighs) (Simon laughing) I can't seem to bro (laughing)

17:40

- [Tobi] Let me get two angels bro, what are you doing? Why are brushing your teeth now? - This motherfucker's brushing his teeth, in the airport.

17:47

- [Tobi] We just landed, bro. - When I sleep I sleep with my mouth open, so my breath becomes horrendous, I'm doing this for you guys.

17:53

- No, man it's calm, were bros, were chill. This guy is actually doing it.

17:58

Shit, damn, then now some other dude, come in and pee and--

18:03

- All right. We made it, this is SouthEnd, insane holiday abroad,

18:09

this is the pinnacle, You know what? Josh is trying to keep us, even though it's sunny, he was trying to keep us in the dark,

18:14

he's keeping us busy at SouthEnd, he's like, oh, they're at SouthEnd they're not going to think they're on the good trip because they're in SouthEnd.

18:21

- He is doing what I'm doing, and guess what? He is Checking us into the Hope hotel.

18:28

- Honestly, we need the Hope hotel, without the Hope hotel what do we have?

18:34

Nice phone case bro.

18:39

- [Harry] Men what's happening?

18:45

- Bet that floor is girly. - That just means, the chest is off the floor. - [Harry] Logan's Quaker. (JJ laughing) He switched it.

18:51

Oh, geez.

18:57

- [Tobi] Does he ever going to stop? - [Harry] It's been done about 10 minutes. - [Simon] I need the bags to come around, or he's going to us some hernia

19:03

- [Simon] I'm not going to lie, boys, it doesn't look like any of the rides are working. - Why does he did this to you guys last time, didn't he?

19:09

He sent you to an empty. - We went all the way to Paris. - It's shut. - The whole thing is shut.

19:15

- What do you mean? - It's shut. (Vik mumbling)

19:22

- It's closed! There's nothing here. (Simon laughing) - Wait, if everything is closed,

19:27

then we actually do have an hour and a half of nothing. - [Ethan] We go down the pier. - Walking?

19:33

- [Ethan] No, we could walk, have you caught that? - We have an hour and a half. All right, welcome to Southend pier.

19:39

- The longest pleasure pier (laughing)

19:44

- [Simon] The longest pleasure pier is (laughing) - Let's go and find our guy, all right, with our names.

19:50

Ah, there we go. Found them him (laughing) Eh, what's up my G?

19:56

Don't know the thing, eh, five star, five star,

20:01

Ferrari? Lamborghini? (laughing) We got a limo?

20:07

- Full transit. - Full transit? Okay. - I know exactly why Josh has sent us here.

20:13

- Why? (Vik whispering) (Ethan laughing)

20:21

Josh did like, all my people go. - Wait the train leaves in four minutes and we've got three tickets.

20:27

- It's up, is it this one? - Yep. And just so you know, it come out of my bank account Josh, so you're giving me 16 Pounds please,

20:35

maybe. - [Simon] 16 Pounds? - Mate I already have a whole day budget. - I haven't been on this train, since I was like this big bro,

20:41

I feel like a giant walking in these. - This train is quit small. Simon is the height of the train.

20:49

- That one is levels bro. - Well it doesn't work, nothing is on Josh.

20:56

- I'm actually a big fan of Simply Shuttles. Yeah man, I know you guys, you guys do big, big things.

21:02

Some of your shuttles are nuts. I went in there and I was like whoa, look how mush space there is.

21:09

Simply Shuttles, let's go. Yeah, my man. - [Tobi] We don't have to sit in, do we?

21:15

(JJ laughing) - It's a nice wheel. - [JJ] Yeah.

21:20

- Hey yo, it's actually quite nice in there fam. - It's lovely. - [JJ] Yeah. Look at this air con

21:26

Oh boys, we've done it, we've done it, we've done it, we've actually done it. - I have faith now,

21:31

I didn't have faith before, but with a nice car, air con. - [JJ] Yeah. - Not Connecticut Airport, I feel, (JJ laughing)

21:40

- Common. - Music video. ♪ All right, yo ♪ ♪ Were here in the South, South ♪

21:47

♪ I know put it in your garage ♪ (glass breaking)

21:52

♪ I've parked my car with screens, smash smash ♪ ♪ Screens, ah ♪

21:59

♪ Yeah, I did ♪ (Simon and Ethan mumbling)

22:09

- [Vik] That was fire bro, straight fire.

22:17

- Oh brilliant, that's one of ours. - I heard the world is your Jimmy thing. How'd you gonna do some pull up,

22:23

pull up, pull up (Vik and Simon laughing)

22:29

please sit down, yes sit down. - I'm still not convinced boys. - No, believe. - If you believe then it's going to be all right.

22:35

- [JJ] Believe my brother. - If you set me up for heartbreak, I swear. - Do you know how long the journey is sir?

22:42

- [Driver] About 55 minutes. - 55 minutes, okay, that's a long time.

22:48

A long time to find that big ass villa, I'm I right?

22:53

- Before were taken to a village south of Malaga, ooh.

22:59

- [JJ] I find this place interesting, luxurious house. - [Harry] This is lovely. - [Ethan] Just want to ask both of you.

23:04

- What? - [Ethan] Are you ready for the lovely sites? (rail squealing)

23:13

I already know that there's (Ethan laughing)

23:18

- All right this is not my first rodeo, on the Southern train, although I'll just say I'm from (mumbles)

23:25

It's awesome. - [Tobi] This place is beautiful. - [JJ] There are so many nice villas.

23:31

- [Harry] Are we staying in any them? (JJ and Tobi laughing) Probably not. - [Tobi] Men if we've got... - Stop with the negativity,

23:37

we've got this, were going to the sickest villa, I know it.

23:43

It's going to be soo boss and we're going to be gassed. - [Harry] Okay. Okay. Okay. I believe, I believe.

23:48

- This, we've actually done it, we've actually done it. Eh, eh, ah, ah,

23:54

the Lord has the Lord has delivered, The Lord has delivered.

23:59

Ah, I'm soo happy. (Harry laughing) I am so happy, ah. Ah, thank you Lord, thank you Jesus,

24:09

thank you. - [Ethan] I want to talk to you seagull, hey you big floaty fuck.

24:16

- [Vik] They used to be back in the day, isn't it? - [Ethan] They did, in it. - [Simon] I think there dead. - [Ethan] I'm not surprised

24:21

bro, look how that life is, look Watson, let me zoom in on this though. Look there just chilling bro, he's doing nothing.

24:29

- [Vik] Josh, this is what you guys are doing. (Simon laughing) - [Simon] Congratulations, you've reached the end

24:34

of Southend pier, we've done it now. Do we do we just go home now?

24:42

- You never call like holiday mementos and stuff like that. - Should we get a picture in front of it? - No, I fucked, let's get back on the train,

24:48

that thing takes like 10 minutes. - That's true. - Let's go, let's get out of here.

24:53

(soft music)

25:00

- [Harry] Mate, it's gated, there's a gate. - Six minutes out. - This can't get worse than this in six minutes,

25:07

surely this is going to be a sick like. - It's happening. I told you to believe. Oh my God, hey yo, I'm just saying.

25:14

- Looking kind of nice. - Yo, legit like the plants are looking nice, the trees are looking blush.

25:20

I've just singing, if we've got the good place, I'm going to do the shake three times (laughing)

25:28

Shaked three times, but. (soft music)

25:35

- Very bright, lovely weather, we could be in somewhere nice in Spain heat.

25:41

- Southend. - Southend eating fish. - Hopefully, hopefully this is a pre cutter

25:47

for bad thing. (soft music)

25:54

- Bro, we've got the nice. - We have to have got, yo, look at this villas (screaming)

26:03

Oh my God. - He's going to put us in the shed at the back of the villas. - No, no, no fam, there's no way.

26:08

- It's important, it's too hot making shade now, there's not going to be place in this area, it's too nice.

26:14

- Josh, wouldn't, he wouldn't be soo horrible to make us drive past nice places would he? - Of course he would, but I don't,

26:19

I don't like the way the driver just laughed at that. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, please, please, please.

26:26

- Hey, getting shit. - We've been scummed.

26:32

- I've been robbed of three Pounds. - This is Ethan raging mode.

26:37

- Fucking Josh. - Three, two, one, zero. - [JJ] Now there's Ferrari there, there's a Ferrari.

26:43

- [Tobi] Mate the village here are beautiful, - I absolutely love this. - Stupendous confectionary.

26:49

- Yo, I may need all the stories. (all laughing) - Mate, we need to go through,

26:55

we need to go for a bar again, it's game over, it's game over. - Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.

27:03

- [Tobi] There's a security guard. - There's a security guard fam.

27:08

- Play cool, play cool. - Look how white middle class, she is bro,

27:15

fam, look, there's a security, oh my God, fam this is, this is it, Oh my God,

27:21

this is screaming rich, screaming.

27:27

Oh my God. - [Harry] Stop screaming. - Screaming, we've done it boys, we've done it.

27:32

- There's there was no, they can't go wrong from here. Like we were through the barrier, like there's no nothing bad can be from here.

27:39

Come on, there's full G up here so I can just play, I can play FIFA on 4G. - Imagine just took us here just to take us somewhere else,

27:46

Oh my God, no, no, no. - [JJ] Why are they all on their phones. - 'Cause there's so much down there. - [JJ] Hey, y'all what's going on?

27:51

Y'all this ain't what I want to see. - Josh wouldn't drive us to a nice villa just to show us and then take us somewhere shit, would he?

27:58

- That's exactly what Josh would do. (Tobi and Harry laughing) - Oh, he's a sick man, I'm not going to lie.

28:04

- [Driver] I beg your passports. - Okay. - Right, they've asked for our passports, that's a good sign.

28:10

- It's a perfect sign, a shark wouldn't ask for our passports. - It wouldn't (all laughing) - [Ethan] All right, time to count all the cash.

28:17

- All right, we've got hopefully massive count here. - [Ethan] Yep, Oh 66? Mate we just won the world cup,

28:23

mate this is a good sign, it's 66 tickets. I think we get a key ring, yeah, we'll get a key ring, yes.

28:28

- All right. (Simon and Vic screaming)

28:35

- Thank you. - [Ethan] All right, let's go to the airport and hopefully go on holiday now. Orange team ain't rocking with a team mascot.

28:41

- They ain't got it. - We've got team mascots. - They ain't got free sweets. - [Ethan] No bro. - I'm feeling positive now.

28:47

- Thank you very much. (speaking foreign language) - (speaking foreign language) - JJ shut up bro.

28:53

- Oh mate, we're transferring to a very nice Mercedes. - Oh, this is an A-class, B-Class,

29:00

A star star class? Like what, what we saying? Yo damn.

29:07

Dripping in style. - Dripping in style by the way. - [JJ] Simply Shuttles, let's go, hey, my chick, don't know, don't know the thing.

29:16

- It's a little difficult to come here with this cars. - Oh, okay. All right because it's a really nice Villa, right?

29:23

- It's a (speaking foreign language)

29:33

- (screaming) Boys, I told you, I told you. - I want to go everywhere with JJ.

29:39

- I'm the lucky charm. - He's been positive from the get-go.

29:45

- Yes. - [Simon] We arrived in sunny Southend and Vik is fuming.

29:56

- I was dreaming for Malaga from 4:00 a.m last night. - Well, that's your fault sort of guess. - [Vik] We're waiting to board our flight.

30:02

Ethan, do you remember when you were gassed that we've got speedy boarding and you know and something nice and premium everyone,

30:10

Every single person on the flight has a speedy. I thought it was a normal queue, it's this speedy boarding queue.

30:16

- Yo, I might cry man. - Ethan is going to be bagging.

30:22

- Oh my God. - And Simon. - Oh my gosh, Simon. All right yo, he's just, bro, he's going to go off in the chat,

30:28

it's just (both laughing)

30:34

- Shut up. (both laughing) Sorry mate, just I'm done now.

30:42

- Josh you blew up my day, I hate airports, I've been stuck in one for hours.

30:49

- We got to go to Southend pier. - Shut up. - Speedy boarding, love it.

30:58

- The mountain jammy damn. - The porch is. - What's it called sorry?

31:03

- Sierra Blanca. - Sierra Blanca wow, yes (speaking in foreign language)

31:11

- I am so, so happy, man, this is it,

31:17

is that a jungle in there? - Oh my God. - Bruh, bro, yes Josh, my nigga,

31:27

- [Tobi] Oh my God, mate. - What is this? Wait, this is like a complex?

31:33

Oh, well we're still going fam, Oh my God, whoa,

31:38

look at the ground, - The grass is well kept. - Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.

31:47

Fam this is mad, this is outrageous. This is outrageous.

31:54

Oh my, yo, I told you to believe, I told you to believe.

32:01

Yes. - Yes. (JJ screaming)

32:08

yo, my man is praying (JJ laughing)

32:13

yes! Yes! - Hello? How's it going? I'm harry.

32:21

- Hi, Tobi. - Oh my God, hey yo to me and my mate,

32:26

good to meet you. Oh my God, good to meet you, hello, hi, Hey, what's up JJ? What's up? Oh my God.

32:33

Yo (JJ laughing) Yes! Yes!

32:41

- So JJ now have just arrived, I can hear JJ screaming and I'm waiting for them by the pool, shouldn't,

32:47

look at that for a view? What is this place? Yeah, I was sitting by the pool, waiting for them. Hopefully they'll walk around the house

32:53

and be excited and they'll come outside and they'll see me chilling and get more excited, we're hoping.

32:59

- The Master, the Master mind. - Can we go out? We can go out?

33:04

We can go, we can go, we can go, we can go. (JJ screaming)

33:13

- I can see them. (JJ, Harry and Tobi screaming)

33:33

- Look in front of us. - Look behind us mate. Look behind us, Oh my God, look.

33:40

- Mate this is nice. - Yeah, I wanted to get here before you, you like that? - Yeah, how did you get here before us?

33:46

Oh my God, bro. JJ, those are punch and exercise bag thing.

33:51

This pool, there's another pool. - Oh my God. I brought my gloves as well. I brought my gloves. I brought my gloves.

33:57

There's two pools, why? what'd you mean there's only two. - There's a third.

34:02

- There's third pool? There's three pools, there's three pools, oh my God.

34:09

Yo, I've never seen grass so green, so, so nicely cut.

34:17

Ah, it smells soo good, it smells rich, soo rich.

34:24

- I want to thank JJ for keeping us positive, I want to thank God, for Josh nicing me with the switch.

34:29

- [Josh] Who was the positive one? - JJ was the whole day.

34:34

- I was like, yes, we got this, - Is Malaga meant to scare us a bit? - [Josh] No, a little bit. Just like, you know, like, what is Malaga?

34:39

What is Malaga? - I was just like, believe, believe.

34:44

- My heart is literally going. - Unreal. Okay, can we see Ethan now? - Who am I looking at?

34:51

- Well you've been on that page for a long time. What's striking your fancy mate. What light meal? - What do you want?

34:58

why you think I've been studying it for so long.

35:05

Why do you think I've been studying off of this page. - I prefer Alicante.

35:13

- Yo, Simon's going to kill you, Simon's going to kill you, - Ramona he's in the best place however.

35:19

- We were like, it's just the type of guy to drive us past nice villas and then take us to somewhere shit.

35:24

Yes (all laughing) - For a second, I was like, Ooh, and then I sold some dodgy villa, that had like graffiti

35:32

and a broken glass, I was like. - Oh no, this is beautiful, the water is appealing. There's a trampoline boys, Oh my God, this is beautiful.

35:40

This is absolutely beautiful. I want to come back here of all the Amanda. That's what I want to do.

35:46

This is possibly the most beautiful place I've ever seen in my life. - Fanta lemon stocked up.

35:54

(upbeat music)

36:06

- [Tobi] All right , let's explore this one, all right so let's what is this room, would you say? This is the? - [JJ] I'd say this is the living room.

36:13

- [Tobi] Probably. This is like the kitchen area.

36:18

Look at this, this is beautiful. - [Harry] We definitely have a chef.

36:23

- [Tobi] Dining areas. - There's like three dining areas.

36:29

These are, these are the, this is the what? The not point. Not, not, not, not 1%, like? (all laughing)

36:38

Aside of this door, another dining area. - [JJ] I don't get it, why is it two dining areas.

36:43

- [Harry] I think just 'cause they can me. (JJ hamming)

36:49

- (speaking in foreign language) How do you say happy? - Nice to meet you. (speaking in foreign language)

36:59

- We're all legit getting lost in here. - JJ it's the office again. - I'm going to go some legit business, you know what I mean?

37:09

(JJ mumbling)

37:14

- There's a button. - I'm pressing the button. - [JJ] Oh, it's lift, it's a lift, it's a lift, Oh my fucking God, it's a lift.

37:21

- It's a lift. - It's a fucking lift. - Get out. - No, put this as a door, there's a door to the lift,

37:29

- [Josh] It's big as the lift. - [JJ] Oh my God. - [Tobi] Are we going down or up? - Let's go up. - There a full bedrooms upstairs

37:35

of which I've claimed one. - [JJ] Okay. - 'Cause it's the smallest one. So there's three to fight over.

37:40

- [Tobi] I honestly don't care. - One is bigger than the others, I think. - You can have the big one. - I, I.

37:46

- [Tobi] Are you still being positive? (JJ laughing) Be fair you've been keeping us going the whole time. - Guys, guys, let's just, be fair with it.

37:51

- [Harry] Open the door. - Oh my God. - That would be the view from the top.

37:57

- Holy, Oh my God. - Holy fuck man.

38:04

Yo. Look at this, this is nuts. - Mate, this is beautiful,

38:09

this is beauty, everything I've ever seen in my life is ugly, this is beauty. - This is your room and you said it was small fam?

38:17

Are you dumb? This? This is your room. Fam, this is your room and you say, it's the worst one?

38:26

How is this, the worst room? - Now this is the terrace, - This is whole thing is your terrace?

38:32

Hey yo, I don't care what you might get, bro. I don't care which I get. - [Harry] Tobi's right though, you, you deserve to go on my, you are,

38:38

you were the positive vibe we needed. I'm still trying figure out which room has the best wifi connection.

38:46

- Fam this ain't a shower, it's the carwash. - [Tobi] Holy shit. - Holy,

38:51

yo, hey boys, you sure you want me to have this? I don't mind.

38:57

Hey, yo, I don't mind having this. - Just to escape, this is me, this is like,

39:03

(all laughing) - Oh my God, you could live here.

39:14

- Fam, this is a room, this is a fucking room. There's a fucking couch.

39:22

(JJ laughing) Are you done yet? - Oh my God.

39:28

- [Harry] If you want to unpack you put like your two shirts there. - Two shirts (laughing)

39:34

- The thing is Ethan would do that, if he was here. - (laughing) Now it like he'll never be in any of these.

39:40

(all laughing) - And this is the bedroom, fuck yeah.

39:45

- Jesus. - Oh my God, look at the view. - This is insane,

39:51

- They say it takes the best, to be honest. - I told you, I told you. - The Orange team is the new red team.

39:57

- Who was the most positive? - [Tobi] JJ. - Bro, I told you. Just be in it. - Even from when we opened the letter he was like

40:03

we got it. - We can take the stairs, I don't know, we're going down two floors.

40:09

- [JJ] What'd you mean take the stair? - [Harry] We don't take stairs anymore, we're past that life. (JJ laughing)

40:15

(Tobi, JJ and Harry screaming)

40:21

- [Tobi] Hey, water never looked this sexy. - Dude there's a whole gym.

40:26

- Hey yo legit, I'm working out, I'm working out, oh yeah, this is what I want, this is what I need.

40:34

(Harry screaming) - Stop gassing me, stop gassing me.

40:39

- Cinema room. - Fucking cinema room. - How many controllers did you bring?

40:45

- I go, I only brought one, sorry lad. - Hey yo, God is looking down at us and is like,

40:51

I'm blessing all of you. - Oh boys and some of poker sessions.

40:59

- Yo, this doesn't place is man! This is soo ridiculous. This doesn't even need to be here,

41:05

there's too much. - There's a steam room.

41:11

- Look at it. - Fam, It's done out here, it's done,

41:17

It's done out here. JJ it's game over fam. We completed, we completed the game,

41:24

we completed the raw, it's completed, it's done,

41:29

It's (speaking in foreign language) - I love the smell of the sauna.

41:35

But it's true, have a sniff it's lovely. - It's quite nice.

41:44

- Oh my God, yes! - This is just the house tour, now we're going to get taken to something home.

41:55

- I'm mean, I'm mean, I'm mean but. I'm I not mean? - Maybe, I think, but you said the sort of that day

42:00

you're always the good one, it's a good one. - Well you see the house.

42:05

- [JJ] Good for you brother. - This is underground car park, is an underground car park.

42:11

- [Harry] But you could legitimately have like one 15, one to 10 cars in it? Easy.

42:18

I'm soo gassed, good meals in the evening, we met the chefs, Oh.

42:24

- I'm sure. Simon and Ethan and Vik are having a lovely time (laughing)

42:32

- All right? We're about to kick off right here, okay? So it's hard to talk about this, 'cause we did speak to you.

42:39

So you said I very graciously gave him the window seat, he said, oh, please can I have the windows seat, 'cause I want to sleep, I want to lean on it.

42:46

So I said, Oh yeah, sure, he weeps out a pillow. - (laughs) A pillow.

42:52

- So he's got a pillow, which means he could have sat here in the middle and gone,

43:00

to his pillow, so instead we've now got to sit here without leaning on me.

43:07

- You can lean on me. - I'm leaning on Simon, do you know what you're? Say it, come on say I'm a shit ass.

43:12

Look into the lens and say, I'm a shit ass. Do it, do it. (both laughing)

43:18

- I'm a shit ass, for bringing my pillow. - I called us up, what I want to do first, do I swim? Do I trampoline? Throw your swing into a,

43:26

get drink? - Yeah, the swings are fucking, okay. - Oh no, no, not yet, it's not positive.

43:31

- Yeah, that's not interesting, I should put gloves. - You need gloves, right? - [JJ] Yeah, I should put my on my gloves.

43:37

How did you I would? - Well you take two days off training? - [JJ] Yeah, true, true. - You got caved in right? - Yeah. Fine. Fine. You smart. You smart.

43:45

- If this is a twist? Josh, am throwing you in the pool, okay? - [Tobi] Okay. - [JJ] Oh God. Oh wow.

43:50

- He wouldn't do that, he wouldn't do that, he's got cameras on. - This is just the decoy. - Open the next one,

43:57

open the next one. - Hey yo, why yo. - Open the next one, open the next one. - Number four, it's in the house.

44:02

- Oh no, Josh. No, no, no, no, no, no, why is it a decoy? Lie, lie, ah.

44:15

- [Tobi] All right, back to Harry. - Number four, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

44:20

- [Tobi] Envelope number five, go on, go ahead. - Oh. My God, okay. - Look at this dude wasting paper,

44:26

we out here trying to save the planet and this is what you did. - How bad do you feel for the other team?

44:32

- [Tobi] I did feel kind of bad for Ethan. - Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no, no, no, no, no.

44:39

- I feel so bad. - I feel really bad. So bad. So bad.

44:44

- We're left in suspense. What does that mean? Josh, don't do this to us please.

44:50

- No, you're fine. You're totally fine. I promise you your thing here, pinky promise?

44:56

- Pinky promise you're staying here. - Okay but. - I'll explain. - This is my little fan.

45:01

Just put your head, the decoy, it's so when I pass your envelope to each team, then even.

45:10

- [Orange Team] Oh. - You guys could get the envelope

45:15

and say this is just a decoy and then ha, ha, ha, ha. - Okay.

45:21

- [Josh] So you're fine, you're good. - [Tobi] Promise? - [Josh] I promise. - [JJ] (laughing) look at my man. Hey yo, legit, legit.

45:29

- (laughing) Okay now JJ. - Thank you, thank you.

45:34

(upbeat music)

45:48

- [Josh] We done? - I'm testing out every pool. - Go on then. - Logan pool, Jake pool all the pools.

45:57

JJ training in there and we got Harry about to jump in. (upbeat music)

46:04

Oh God. It's quiet, it's quiet, but you have to really eat though, there's stair beneath you.

46:11

You need to get some distance and wherever it is, oh God (water splashing)

46:18

You might miss it, again, again,

46:23

- Which team is it again? - [Josh] Orange team. - (shouting) Orange team.

46:32

- That one hurt more, right? That one hurt more, surely I heard a snap. (upbeat music)

46:43

- (laughing) Okay, you're on. (upbeat music)

46:51

(Ethan clapping) - [Vik] No, no, I won the bad holiday. I hope were going somewhere awful now.

46:58

- Guys we got to the baggage. - Yeah, well we've actually made a friend. Do you mind being on camera? - I don't mind, hello guys.

47:06

- Introduce yourself. - I'm Jay and I want to be these guys. - Have you been following us in the airport?

47:12

- I'm following you guys for a while, a walk across country. - So people follow us online.

47:19

- I've been following you since the airport was like that's a bit open. (Simon laughing)

47:27

- That's wild. - So let's open number three now, it says you driver will be waiting for you at arrivals hall

47:33

with a board that is one of your names. Open this envelope at the destination. - Oh, it doesn't even live here.

47:40

- So we don't even know why, why, why would Josh send someone to keep an eye on us.

47:46

- Ethan booked he can't go anywhere. - (Simon and Vik laughing) I will not do that. Now, I'm shaking.

47:52

(all laughing) - It is dinner time.

47:58

- Hold on, hold on, is that caviar? That is, that is caviar (all laughing)

48:12

- It's the rich kid caviar (laughing) - Wait. Where's my where's my caviar?

48:21

- Would you like to have some caviar? - Yeah, what's wrong? - It's bad for you.

48:28

- Oh is it? - I don't even like it.

48:35

- Oh, just stop. - [Josh] If you lose, then I will buy the caviar.

48:40

- Oh really it's safe? - I never had caviar before, this is the first time I'm trying.

48:45

My first taste of the fish eggs. (soft music)

48:53

Oh, it tastes like, ooh, it tastes like mac Roy

49:03

- I don't want to eat it, - JJ you should.

49:11

- He's having caviar. - No more, it's small grapes.

49:18

Thanks for the small grapes man.

49:25

- [Harry] His first time trying caviar. - [Josh] It's said caviar. - Caviar. - With caviar sir,

49:33

well, I don't know. Wait, don't make that face of delicacy. - I hate caviar

49:40

- I appreciate life. - [Tobi] It's the little things. - [Josh] Could be worse. - Come on man, three times.

49:46

That's mad. I've been with every person, in the good team.

49:53

Ooh. Yeah. Spinach chicken, no skin and potato slices.

50:02

Yummy. - No, the launch you made mine looks pretty healthy too. - Same (all laughing)

50:09

- Ethan where you're going through right now. - I'm going through a lot man, I don't want to talk to any of you.

50:16

- [Vik] It's not looking good, is it? Is that 80% is to become about 29%. - It's very comfortable.

50:21

- [Vik] I know. I know. - It almost ruined my confidence. - [Vik] Shut up.

50:28

- This what you do in life. You don't have hopes and dreams so that you can have it be disappointed. - So Ethan said, we've landed,

50:34

it doesn't look like a holiday, then he says, yeah we reach out out there,

50:39

a big man says, I've been following you. (all laughing)

50:45

- [JJ] Oh no. - [Harry] Oh my God. - So he thought it was the body guard. (all laughing)

50:52

- [Simon] You getting in the back? He's pissed now.

50:57

What's up, Ethan? - [Vik] This could be creepy.

51:05

- [Simon] There's always hope. - Simon put the camera down.

51:11

(Tobi laughing)

51:18

- Gym time. (suspense music)

51:23

- [Simon] Oh boys welcome to Benidorm, I can't even see.

51:28

- You're not going to see me. - [Simon] Yes I did. - 'Cause I'm going missing, in Benidorm I'm.

51:35

- [Simon] And Vik? - I don't know what you want me to do. (Simon laughing)

51:42

- You guys are parallel site. - I convinced myself I was on the good one, Simon. - [Tobi] Simon.

51:48

- [Simon] That's why I said never have hopes and dreams and you'll never be let down. - Why would he send us to SouthEnd for day

51:54

and it wasn't for a good reason? - Benidorm fam.

52:00

- Yeah. I think at this point, at this point there's no real hope here. - I think we've officially hit the point of no return.

52:10

- Yeah, were literally driving, I mean look.

52:16

This is what we're driving down right now. - There's nothing luxury about the place.

52:24

- Unless were put up to some sort of like Pent house or something. - No. It's not, it's not, this is it. We are done.

52:30

(Simon laughing) (Orange team hamming and laughing)

52:50

- [Tobi] We getting in trouble for singing these. (singing) copyright. (Orange team hamming)

53:08

- You proud of yourselves? - Yes. - All right, we have reached our destination

53:16

and times have never ever looked bleaker. - Ethan is (laughing)

53:23

- I couldn't think of a place that left once ago. - It's official though, stay away from me, I'm a whirlwind of bad luck.

53:30

- Oh, we've got a two here. - [Ethan] Oh here we go. - All right, hope you like your rooms at Hotel Marbella.

53:35

Now it's time for your evening fun. I've sorted out your outfits for the night.

53:42

- What do you mean? - Open SideMen package. - This is a mockery, he's put us on an 11 hours journey

53:50

to get to Benidorm. - Lay it off. - Let it go. Welcome to Benidorm Bingo.

53:57

- Why are we calling everything in the worst most ironic, stupid way ever. - Please turn over for a list of things

54:03

I would like you to do before the night is done. (Simon laughing) Get selfies with another group.

54:10

We can do that, that's easy - Yeah, here we go with the 50 year olds - Find Ethan a girlfriend.

54:15

(all laughing) - That won't work. - Find a Karaoke bar, buy accessories for your outfits,

54:23

find local star Sticky Vicky. That sounds good disgusting. - You got garbage.

54:28

- What do you mean find local star? - For activities (both laughing)

54:33

- Ride the mechanical bull at the Red Lion. - Is he dumb? He's got us here at 10:00 p.m and give us a list of things to do.

54:40

I'm going to kill him. - Go to Star Wars show. - What do you mean? What do you mean? - It's 10:00 P.m. - Do a round of shots with strangers.

54:45

- But it's 10:00 p.m. - Is he dumb? - Get a drink from as many bars as possible. Party until the night is done. - Were going on a wild night out boys.

54:52

- He's taken the absolute piss here. Okay, if you started was doing this at like 7:00 p.m sure you've given us some. - 7:00 p.m?

54:58

Ain't nobody out at 7:00 p.m, how are we going to find Ethan a girlfriend at 7:00 p.m? - Go home at 7: 00 p.m.

55:03

- Ain't that right? The good ones go home at 7:00 p.m he doesn't want Benidorm what should happen (laughing) late night, but it's going to be 11:00 p.m.

55:09

- That was Sticky Vicky. - It's going to be 11:00 p.m, before we get girls on the Benidorm. - Hello mate? You've given us a do list, it's 10 o'clock.

55:17

- Yep. - Come look at you, you sound like you're cosy, tucked up in a nice bed, don't you? Where are you Josh? Where are you Josh?

55:25

- We will find you. - You will find out. - We will find you, we will come to where you're.

55:30

- What is that? - He said I'm following you. - You're not Josh. We've been following the day already been followed and you're not here

55:35

and you're not putting a city outfield, all right? (Josh laughing) goodbye.

55:41

- We found it. - Bro, it's not going to have AC and I'm going to, I'm done, I'm done, I'm giving you up.

55:48

- Well, I'm trying to chill champ. - [Attendant] (speaking in foreign language)

55:56

- What? Josh does to us this really? (Simon laughing)

56:03

- [Vik] He sounded so snaggy. - He doesn't understand how angry I'm. - [Vik] I can't ever understand but.

56:11

- I'm going to prison in Benidorm. - [Vik] Hello darkness your old friend.

56:17

- Do you know what's yours? - [Vik] Yeah, should we go in? Should expect something bad as well.

56:24

- [Vik] It can't be working with either hotel. - I mean, it's very snugly.

56:29

- [Vik] Two single beds that I'm sharing with our new friend, that's somewhere so nice.

56:36

This is what we got. Wait, please do something. Okay. - It's on. - [Vik] Okay. Okay.

56:42

- All right. Were going to go to ours. (dramatic music)

56:47

- Two more. - Only two? Know were staying in the same place. Come here.

56:53

- Is there stuff on the door? - Oh my God.

56:59

- [Vik] That's written. - I'm nervous. - [Vik] Bro, bro, someone's actually broken the door.

57:08

- I reckon it was Sticky Vicky. - Copy paste, Ctrl+C. - Wait, you've got, wait, what's all this you've got.

57:15

- We've got a thing, what? - [Vik] This, one of these things. - It's a bed with a fucking blanket on it.

57:21

- Open that. - [Vik] All right. Let's hope it's nice, were Purple team aren't we?

57:29

- [Vik] Yeah. - So it is Purple. - Purple team, we're just, we're walking around Purple team.

57:36

- [Vik] What does it say on the back? - Sidemenclothing.com - Bro he didn't even give us custom names.

57:42

- Simon, this has to be a joke, this is scripted, this video is written. Come here fam, you will not believe.

57:49

This is what happened, come have a look at my door.

57:57

I opened my door and the lock has come out. Put you, pull the thing and the lock comes off.

58:04

- You might be in Sticky Vicky by the end. - [Vik] (laughing) No, no, no, this isn't a joke.

58:09

What do you mean? We off in your room, I'm done, I'm not, I'm not having this. - [JJ] I'm telling you Vik is fuming.

58:16

- [Josh] You training for fire? You're trying for the fire? - You don't get to fight each shadow.

58:22

- I'm not going to comment on that. - [Josh] What is this? You said you're having a gym session, what is this?

58:29

- [Tobi] Trying to lift some weights. - [Josh] I'm not going to try, they're. - Show me. - Take 17 let's see something good.

58:36

- It's not a good idea boys. - Why? - Just looking at your arms. They're not, they're not really looking. - What it sounded, it sounded like anything.

58:44

- Are you lifting a 7.5? Is that what you can do. - It's not about how heavy you lift. - Oh, wait you're only lifting 22.5 pounds.

58:52

- [Josh] He's not sure if he is, yeah, hang on. Just wait, come on, you can to make it yeah.

59:03

- [JJ] Oh wow, that's impressive. - [Josh] You're right, you're Gucci.

59:09

Stay firm, breathe. - [JJ] Is that the heaviest one? - [Josh] No. - [JJ] I said go (laughing)

59:18

- [JJ] Oh, is that you, yeah? Whoa.

59:24

- Vik's getting a new room real quick, that's what Simon said. - [Josh] Why? - His handle fell off.

59:30

(all laughing) - Sometimes in life boys, you've got to appreciate what you have.

59:36

- You've got appreciate the good things in life. - I'm very appreciative right now. - Same.

59:41

- You know, I don't know, I don't think this is good enough. (both laughing)

59:47

Bro, the room next to me kicked in. - Josh, where have you put them?

59:53

- Where have you put them? (phone ringing)

59:58

- Hey yo, what's men? - Wait you're freezing? - What country are you in?

1:00:04

- [Josh] Wait. - Wait you should turn the camera side ways. - Josh the shut the up.

1:00:09

- Bro, I'll fucking kill you. - Josh shut the fuck up, what country are you in? - They're going to kill you.

1:00:15

- Where are you? - We want to know where you're

1:00:20

state your location ASL. - No you first.

1:00:26

- We asked what'd you mean? Josh knows. - No we asked first.

1:00:32

- They're actually in my Marbella. - Oh, you're in my Marbella.

1:00:37

(Orange team cheering)

1:00:45

- Okay let's see where you're at. - Oh, were about to head out.

1:00:54

Wait, wait, why is Harry, the only one wearing the t-shirt? - Yeah, you guys froze. - Yeah, we were in the gym, working out.

1:01:02

- Yeah you need it, you fat fuck. - I can't see Vik and Ethan.

1:01:08

- I'm trying. - Squeeze in. - Yeah, look at them they're like fucking twats.

1:01:15

(Orange team laughing) - We don't look any different to any other day, and you just said we look like twats.

1:01:20

- [JJ] Where are you? - We are in Benidorm,

1:01:26

No one else does my excitement. - I did a

1:01:33

- Lads were in I think this is genuinely the best house I've ever seen in my life. - Yes, 100%.

1:01:39

- It's incredible. - Can we have a little tour? - No, no, shut down, I don't need to see it. - I don't know, how long you got? You got an hour?

1:01:48

- Okay. Give us, give us a little view. - Why? We just got a noise complaint.

1:01:54

- We just got a noise complaint, it's too rowdy.

1:02:01

- We got to go. - Wait, I'm going to send you a video, what we add to this, okay?

1:02:07

- Yes, he kicked their outside, then boom. - Hi Tobi, don't put the shirt on now, you're embarrassing yourself,

1:02:12

you're embarrassing yourself Tobi, come on. - Did you say loose handle fell off?

1:02:18

- His. - Harry sent the video. - Oh, mate, Oh mate.

1:02:29

- I'm going to survive. - Yo, it actually looks like you're in the,

1:02:35

is there air con? Oh, is that the random black dude? (all laughing)

1:02:40

- What did he say? - Is that random black dude?

1:02:46

Show me the video? - No, no, don't watch it. - Are you sure you want to see it? - Let me see it.

1:02:54

(Simon laughing)

1:03:00

- Josh is here, look, look. Josh and not worry about the video that you sent me.

1:03:08

How are you? I want to punch his (Ethan mumbling)

1:03:14

(Vik and Simon laughing)

1:03:20

- That's a nice screenshot. - Oh no, just jump in here.

1:03:26

- 'Cause listen here Josh, I've had three in a row now, so that's me, I'm striked out Josh, okay?

1:03:32

I'm planning the next one and guess what, you're first on the bad one, you shit head.

1:03:47

- We didn't hear what you said. - You didn't hear what I said am going to (Simon laughing)

1:03:53

- Okay, all right, all right. - That was it summed up?

1:04:00

- We're about big night out. - We got in for a session. - I have a nice little cute evening guys.

1:04:06

- And I have a cute evening with just you three. We're going to go. - We're going to turn up, were going to cause a scene?

1:04:13

Harry's jealous there's bad Cat hair. - Wait, toss as well.

1:04:19

- Go fuck yourself. (Orange team laughing) - Well, it's more of a, you know, if you want to do it, do it, you know.

1:04:26

- We don't want to tell you our tasks, okay? You big noodle headed piece of fuck. - Yeah, I can't wait for no good to win, fuck you.

1:04:33

- Yeah fuck you. (purple team laughing) - Our lads are not happy. (JJ laughing)

1:04:43

- I just want to take this moment to say Josh, I love you. - They launched a noise complaint.

1:04:48

- Oh my God. - Yes they got a noise complaint, they're in Benidorm.

1:04:54

They're supposed to be party, place they're going. - They put in the groups chat, let's book a trip for Josh soon

1:05:00

and withdraw everything (all laughing) - Yeah, yeah, yeah man.

1:05:08

- I have to. - I have to. I actually have to. - All the boys looking great in that team purple,

1:05:15

on a big night out a big Wednesday night out. - Genuinely is a Wednesday, what happens if no one is out?

1:05:22

- It doesn't look like anyone is. - Purple team are in Benidorm as you heard, but the little trick is there in hotel Marbella

1:05:31

you all in Marbella, so you're both on the same trip, just different. - Oh my God.

1:05:38

- [Vik] There's no life, there's no life in this town right now. It looks like we're actually like

1:05:44

like we're YouTubers on lad street and we're filming it as if like Benidorm is like

1:05:50

the pinnacle of hype. - So it's a one-star hotel. (all laughing)

1:05:58

I think their rooms cost less than that your cars here and back. - [Vik] Bro look at the signs for what is this place?

1:06:06

- Boy? - [Vik] Oh, Simon sported an absolute scene right now. - This, this is why Josh brought us here.

1:06:12

- [Vik] Honestly, I actually, I'm not even mad anymore. - I think this is the guest night.

1:06:18

- I couldn't be unhappier. - This is Josh's idea of a wild night out. - [Vik] Bro, I'm telling you, you remember

1:06:25

SouthEnd pier to Benidorm he's put us on an NYP's trip. - This is what he's doing a cheer.

1:06:31

- [Vik] He's sending us the scout. (Vik laughing)

1:06:36

- In that envelope, it says, Oh, welcome to Benidorm, here's a game of Benidorm bingo for you to play. So there's a list of activities, once complete

1:06:43

put out articles, set a tick them all off, and you've got fine Sticky Vicky, which is a local thing in Benidorm,

1:06:50

It's a female who sticks things inside herself. - Jesus Christ.

1:06:56

- I ain't going to lie, right? I feel like the in between, he said to go to this bar we're going to go in and it's just going to be us,

1:07:02

there's only like two girls and were going to be like. - [Vik] This is real, this is real, we're not following a script.

1:07:08

- There was a Star Wars show which I told you about that is also Darth Vader, having sex on his phone.

1:07:15

(all laughing) - I feel very betrayed, and you know what?

1:07:20

Do you know how I feel betrayed by? - Who? - Woody. - Oh, well that was in a happier Woody.

1:07:27

Bro, when I caught Woody I was convinced that we were going through a night in Spain. Woody was going to be all purple team mascot.

1:07:33

- Yeah. - After that, they're to try and stay out until the party's closed, so that's like 5:00 a.m. You'll get a different drink at like maybe as possible,

1:07:41

so it's like a pup pool basically. - Men this sounds sick. - Exactly, I told you. - Yeah, no, this is my type of trip, but nah.

1:07:48

- Yeah. I don't think he'd have done it, but that's the night, they got big night out and as much as it's the, basically a bunch of listings they got to do and just go have fun with that.

1:07:55

- Why did it take him so long to get there? - The big surprise this morning when I got there was your flight is going from SouthEnd.

1:08:03

(Harry laughing) so when you get to Gatwick,

1:08:09

they open their boarding pass and you saw, we used the Gatwick North and you saw Gatwick South.

1:08:14

What they saw was SouthEnd 5:00 p.m. - I'm getting more and more grateful by the second.

1:08:21

- It doesn't sound awful, it's like going out on a lad's holiday, when you're like 17, 18.

1:08:26

It's like going Zante or something. That's what it should be like. - Well, which one would you pick Harry?

1:08:32

- I would pick this one obviously, but, but, but I can see the fun. - I can see the fun.

1:08:38

- The thing they can have fun, if they try and have fun. - I reckon it well, I reckon the love of guitar, Simon seems to good spirits,

1:08:44

as long as I don't break into the room, that's fine. - Sticky Vicky? - [Josh] Yeah.

1:08:50

- How do you find Sticky Vicky? I can show you some videos of Sticky Vicky. - I want to see Sticky Vicky, not on camera though.

1:08:57

- [Simon] All right, we stopped off a quick, you know quick meal. - We thought we should treat ourselves. - [Simon] See were going out on a night of drinking.

1:09:02

So me and Ethan had started in the pina coladas, gang gang. Vik?

1:09:07

- I have a goblet of Malibu is this is more than double, this is at least a triple.

1:09:14

- [Simon] It's a Malibu and Sprite, except there's no room for the sprite.

1:09:19

- We're trucking our ways places. - This place is soo tragic. - I'm actually getting depressed based off of this. - This is what people that have been married for maybe

1:09:26

let's say 22 years or something and guess what your marriage is down boring, it's been for a while.

1:09:32

So what are you going to do? - To spice things up. - Is you going to go to Benidorm and hopefully have lots of erotic sex in a three-star hotels.

1:09:37

And you think. - That's a four star? - That's a four star, and you want to push out and get a little Neal Mark on your balcony

1:09:43

and you think that that's going to rescue 22 years of marriage and all you're going to do is argue in Benidorm.

1:09:48

- That's all we've seen, all we've seen is people sat at coffee tables outside bars. - And rescuing marriages. - Just clear up, I hate this (laughing)

1:09:57

I hate the fact that we were walking down the street in matching t-shirts, saying Purple team,

1:10:02

this is really upsetting. Just to clear up, I fucking hate karaoke,

1:10:09

I am not touching them. - Ah, after the shots maybe. - I'm not. - Got some posts on there mate.

1:10:16

- Do accessories make this worse or bad? - We're buying you a hat. - I don't know like I should be allowed on the streets in this.

1:10:21

- I look like I'm trying to save my marriage. - Guys where is it popping off on a Wednesday night?

1:10:27

(upbeat music)

1:10:35

♪ You seem to know ♪ ♪ Staff that I don't ♪ ♪ What's going on ♪ - I've got this.

1:10:43

- It's lucky we don't have to find him a girlfriend. - All right, so first of all,

1:10:48

our day started with the SouthEnd pier mile and our day's ending with The Curry mile,

1:10:55

it matches our branding too. - [Ethan] Yeah it does. All right who wants to do a punch machine? - [Vik] Simon, what do you have to say about

1:11:00

the ambience right here? The ambience, the party, one of the things on the list is,

1:11:06

get a drink from as many bars as possible. - [Vik] Oh, we're getting a drink. (upbeat music)

1:11:18

♪ You seem to know ♪ ♪ Something I don't ♪ ♪ What's going on ♪

1:11:23

♪ Can you tell me what it is please? ♪ ♪ I'm not that slow ♪ ♪ Like you think ♪

1:11:29

♪ Strange vibrations in the room and I can feel it ♪ ♪ But you don't know ♪

1:11:36

- So we're finding Ethan a girlfriend tonight. ♪ I'm a hurricane ♪ ♪ I'm bringing thunder and rain ♪

1:11:42

♪ I'm a hurricane ♪ ♪ If you get in my way ♪

1:11:48

- She just offered you a blow job. - I don't want to have sex before marriage dude. (Simon laughing)

1:11:54

She could put me off, if she said I was going to go out for a nice drink and have a nice meal, I would have said I'll be there.

1:12:01

- And split the bill, she went (Simon laughing) - Unbelievable.

1:12:08

- Guys, midget strippers Chaplin. - Oh Josh sent us to a mad man.

1:12:15

- Oh you go first, Oh my God, you're hunted fuck.

1:12:21

(JJ, Tobi and Josh clapping)

1:12:27

- [JJ] What the fuck is that? Is that Liverpool pitch, oh mate this place sucks.

1:12:35

Take me to Benidorm man, I want to leave.

1:12:41

No, no, wait, I'm kidding, Don't come on man relax, can we not joke. (upbeat music)

1:13:00

♪ Oh, you're rolling punches ♪ ♪ I'm catching scars ♪ - You did great.

1:13:06

♪ I'm a hurricane ♪ ♪ I'm bringing thunder and rain ♪ ♪ I'm a hurricane ♪

1:13:11

♪ If you get in my way ♪ ♪ I'm a hurricane ♪ ♪ Always on top of my game ♪

1:13:17

- I'm going to enter the steam room. Wish me luck.

1:13:22

Let's go. Let's go, okay.

1:13:30

You see, it ain't so bad. - Are you Stick Vicky?

1:13:37

Do you know of a Sticky Vicky, will you be my girlfriend?

1:13:46

(upbeat music)

1:13:53

- [Ethan] What we do is we just leave that there. - Why are you filming?

1:14:02

Oh, I'm dizzy, I'm dizzy. Was I even in any of that? I'm dizzy now.

1:14:09

♪ I'm a hurricane ♪ What was that? What did you say? - It's a magic show.

1:14:17

- Sex magic show. - We have a checklist of things to do, and one of them is find Sticky Vicky,

1:14:22

You can fish a midget for a - Where are we? Where are we?

1:14:29

- That's what I've just heard. - You want to fish the midget? - No, I just want to end the list.

1:14:38

I have a girlfriend I'm happy. - So can we just watch? Wait, wait, we need to find Sticky Vicky.

1:14:45

- She's inside. - She's in there in The Red Lion. - Can we go see that? Do we have to pay?

1:14:51

- Walk straight in. - Walk straight in. All right, cheers guys, have a good one.

1:14:56

(Simon laughing) - What has Josh done? - How does Josh know about it?

1:15:01

Josh knows about it. - Were going off record we'll let you know.

1:15:09

- We'll let you know our reactions. (water splashing)

1:15:19

- It's really boring in there. - What did you do? - I don't know, I was just sitting there.

1:15:25

- You can sit here and chill. - I might try the sauna. - Oh, boy, it is hot in here.

1:15:31

(soft music) - Day one's complete,

1:15:37

the bed's looking nice and Juicy. I'm asleep like a King tonight, y'all K-I-N-G.

1:15:47

Yeah, real good, all right y'all, good night motherfuckers. - Sticky Vicky, you're very talented (Vik laughing)

1:16:01

All I'm saying right, is a pole about this long.

1:16:09

- And you know it strictly comes on, and it gets pretty fun, she started putting out.

1:16:14

- What have we got left? - Watch The Star Wars.

1:16:21

- The Star Wars show. - Hey mate, do you know where the Star Wars show is? - It's another session.

1:16:26

- Josh's good, Josh, Josh.

1:16:35

(Ethan laughing) - All right Josh, I want to know your search history.

1:16:40

- What? - What is going on?

1:16:48

- I want her to be my girlfriend. - Go on Ethan, off you go Ethan.

1:17:03

- [Simon] Purple team. - He's the leader, he's the leader. - He's the leader. - He's the leader of purple team, with hat.

1:17:10

do you like his hat? - You have to agree to be my girlfriend,

1:17:16

would be my girlfriend? - Would you be his girlfriend? - All right see you later boys.

1:17:21

(Vik screaming) - Shots? Yeah?

1:17:28

- How many shots? - One, theo, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine. Nine shots right?

1:17:36

- Shots of Sambuca 12 shots of Sambuca.

1:17:45

We'll be back for a minute. - We're on a budget, but we're still gracious bargain.

1:17:52

- We're spending all our money. - Twenty five shots. - [Vik] Deal, bargain.

1:17:59

- To that lot, we'll have one and anyone else who wants one, can have it.

1:18:04

(upbeat music)

1:18:14

- We're out of London - We're just here for a night or two then we'll go home so, we're enhancing their holiday,

1:18:22

they're enhancing our checklist, it's a trade off. (upbeat music)

1:18:51

- All right so that means, selfies done, girlfriend done, accessories done, Sticky Vicky done.

1:18:56

Bull done. - No one did Sticky Vicky. - Doing shots with strangers, done.

1:19:07

So, if we do the karaoke and The Star Wars. - We're done. - All in a night. - Purple team, smashed it, Purple team smashed it.

1:19:14

(Purple team shouting) - I liked your hide and seek video. (Purple team shouting) fuck you Orange team.

1:19:22

- Yeah fuck Orange team. (upbeat music)

1:19:31

- Drink responsibly. (upbeat music)

1:19:46

- Fuck Orange team. - Fuck you Josh. ♪ Today is going to be the day that I fall back to you ♪

1:19:55

♪ My love, I should've somehow realise what you got to do ♪

1:20:00

♪ I don't believe that everybody ♪ ♪ Feels the way I feel about you now ♪

1:20:07

♪ That may be, may be ♪

1:20:17

- All right, I'll tell you what? I don't care what the price of this holiday was, this holiday is price. - This holiday is priceless.

1:20:24

- I'm just saying, you know when Josh is spending the money, you got a big, like a big house anytime.

1:20:32

I had to specify. - You don't get Big Stones. - You don't get big stones singing Wonder World

1:20:37

with a bunch of jolly lads. (Purple team singing)

1:20:46

I'm happy right now. - We were so bad, we need to make a copy right for Wonder World.

1:20:54

It was acoustic. - Just chill, chill for a second, last of it. - Where are we? Where are we now?

1:20:59

- We are now. - Oh, look where we are. - We are now back at The Red Lion, for the final check list,

1:21:05

final one. - The red line - Watch the Star Wars show. - Which is a sex show,

1:21:11

- It's a sex show, so again, we're going to have to show our reactions.

1:21:16

- [Vik] Off the record again. (upbeat music)

1:21:27

- I think, I've seen it all, now, I'm ready to go home.

1:21:33

I don't know what I've witnessed, bro you thought you had done something on the internet.

1:21:39

- Fam, internet, don't don't ever, ever, ever chat about me

1:21:44

on the sweet way again in the now what we've just witnessed.

1:21:51

- There's nothing to say to it. She was fucking his head upside down.

1:21:59

- But guy selfies done, girlfriend done, karaoke done, accessories done,

1:22:04

Sticky Vicky done, bull done, Star Wars done,

1:22:09

shots done, drink from as many bars as possible done. - And party until the night is done.

1:22:19

- Done out here. - But honestly. - Let's take a nice walk home now.

1:22:26

- I'm buffed, yeah we're going to walk home, let's go. - My friends are back, so I said,

1:22:33

hey mate could you guard us home, to the Marbella hotel, how do you think he typed Marbella into his phone?

1:22:38

- [Simon] Well, I mean Marbella it's spelled M-A-R-B-E-L-L-A

1:22:46

Oh my God. - [Ethan] Marbaya hotel. - Marbaya. - 'Cause you've typed it out, you would say it.

1:22:53

- I've been in Beni for too long. - Three thirty five Josh said,

1:22:58

party until the night it's done. - The night was cancelled. - I think the night is done. - Star Wars shut down the night, that was a big spectacle.

1:23:06

- Yeah. I mean, well, me and you are gonna spoon tonight. - Have a great night.

1:23:11

- [Simon] Yeah. - And all I wanted was to come back to a nice air conditioned chill hotel room,

1:23:18

the fucking chased out budget. So budget that your times out after 20 minutes while rooms are hot.

1:23:25

- No, you're a self entitled millennial and I'm done with you, get out of my room

1:23:31

- [Simon] Get out of my room bro. Our room. - Our room - [Simon] Get out of our room bro. - [Ethan] Piss of little one.

1:23:36

- [Simon] We'll see you tomorrow. - [Team] One, two, go.

1:23:43

- We'll see you tomorrow, Vik, let's go, baby.

1:23:49

- This is what's going down, the reason why me and Lux are here, it's how I took the hoodie off because it's serious right now, it is game time,

1:23:54

we are on the way to the best holiday, so obviously there's the worst team and the best team,

1:24:01

we're going to the best destination, thank you Simon for this free holiday. We really appreciate it, but yeah, we really do.

1:24:08

Thank you guys, but we're on our way to go and meet and surprise that they have no idea,

1:24:14

that we're going, I've been playing tricks with Harry all week. - I asked him about the holiday yesterday. I was like, yo what are you doing tomorrow,

1:24:20

where are you going? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, me and Caleb

1:24:26

have know about this for ages and finally it's come around and yes there's lots of exciting things planned.

1:24:32

So you guys are really going to enjoy this video and we're really excited because well we get to do those exciting things, so happy days.

1:24:38

- It's breakfast. - Breakfast

1:24:46

- Like a king yo, - 11:00 AM, if you look outside (Harry shouting)

1:24:51

the day is about to start. - We doing yoga?

1:24:57

- What? Oh my God (laughing) - I need that.

1:25:02

- Yoga with the Orange team. - Look at the view, the view

1:25:08

- Mountain pause, tree pause, will do doing all of those,

1:25:15

so do let me know when you do need a break. - I need a break.

1:25:20

(soft music)

1:25:33

- All right, night mare has started guys. - I have lost my phone, I left my phone on the train,

1:25:39

realised when we got upstairs. We've had a look for it downstairs, nothing,

1:25:44

It's definitely on the train and then unfortunately am the helpful guy ever.

1:25:49

- Bless his soul but he was absolutely useless. - Because I wanted him to call the next station

1:25:54

to try and get them to come on, to get some of them. When he was like, I'll call the final station. - Whatever, either whatever.

1:26:00

- I don't have my phone, and I'm fucking pissed. - It's cause he's got to talk to me now,

1:26:06

he's got nothing to distract him. I know your bag's been selected for a searching.

1:26:12

Not a great start. (soft music)

1:26:27

Feel bad for Lux man, like. - Look at this, ready? This is my laptop charger.

1:26:33

I'm trying to upload it, I'm trying to, I'm trying to edit a video for you guys right now and I can't charge my...

1:26:40

- Not a great day then. - Anyway, we're going on a great holiday, it's going to cheer me up.

1:26:46

- With what phone? (laughing) - We just lift this leg up in the air,

1:26:51

we're looking for a T shape. (soft music)

1:26:58

Lift those knees straight.

1:27:07

- Look at this, this is a disgrace bro. - I'm two inches smaller than me. - I'm being deadly serious guys,

1:27:14

I honestly got way more room in easy jet flights than this BA one. - Sidebar, Josh, what is this?

1:27:21

Why're we soo far back, we're coming from making it.

1:27:26

- We're not charging day rates, are we charging day rates? - Oh we're now. - Oh, we have to now, because of this, because of this.

1:27:33

- There's a fly on my shirt. - Resent, resent. (soft music)

1:27:43

(all laughing) (Orange team chanting)

1:27:51

(soft music)

1:28:01

- The next activity. - [JJ] She looks like she looks like masseuse. - Masseuse?

1:28:07

- We're getting a massage (screaming) let's go.

1:28:18

- We're invoicing the SideMen for these, for these. - These bottles of juice.

1:28:24

- All right, so we have envelope, number five. We didn't have two, there's only this one, number six. - So two left, so I'm going to add an early back,

1:28:31

'cause I predict she's every move that we're going to the beach and. - [Vik] He's going to give us some another list

1:28:37

of pointless Tasks. - I want to, I said, I want to build a sand castle, so if is the beach I want to build a sand castle.

1:28:45

- What do we got? - Oh, I'll tell you why wakey, wakey, hope you're not hanging too much shower,

1:28:52

head to Lavante beach and open next envelope. - Oh my God.

1:28:58

- They're Getting them massages.

1:29:03

- (sighing) I can just go, go, go, go, go full out, and then I'll tell you if it's too much.

1:29:10

- Oh wow, okay. - The last time I got a massage,

1:29:15

the guy said I was really not, I should have more massages, but I didn't go back.

1:29:29

(soft music)

1:29:34

- There we go. (soft music)

1:29:44

Whoa (JJ laughing)

1:29:57

- Yeah. - Okay, so let's get the guys from the house and I've got the car, down to the Harbour by myself

1:30:04

because the next activity is a boat for a few hours but it's a big, big surprise, which they don't know about.

1:30:10

Which is why I've left early on my own. - We're going to go get some lunch,

1:30:16

find somewhere along here and maybe have a couple of beverage to start,

1:30:21

look at what a beautiful day, with the palm trees are out there singing and water looks bluer than ever,

1:30:27

mainly because I'm here. Can you can you I'll turn it up. - You need to behave yourself. - All right, cool, anyways, I'm getting gassed.

1:30:33

So, all right, we're going to have a good brekkie and we come all the way out to Spain,

1:30:40

to have an English breakfast, looking at chilling.

1:30:45

- I think see them, I think I see them, glad seeing you here.

1:30:52

What's you guys doing here? - You guys did, you got a yacht as well?

1:30:59

- We've got a yacht (laughing)

1:31:05

- [Simon] Boys I'm just saying right? I thought last night, was there any time we're going to wear matching t-shirts.

1:31:13

Why are you two wearing matching t-shirts again? We'll just send to open it, once we got to the beach and the beach is right there.

1:31:19

- We're just getting ready. - So ready? It's just thick by the way.

1:31:27

- [Vik] Thick boy. - Where are we off to lads? - We don't know. - We have no idea, Josh just...

1:31:33

- We've been given good towels and been told to bring our swimsuit. So I have a feeling it's a beach.

1:31:40

- Beach, beach, take me away. - It's not quite the word. - This is not another word? - It's like, let's go to the beach beach,

1:31:46

let's go get away. - I'm going to see a beach beach, take me away.

1:31:53

- Hello (speaking in foreign language) air con.

1:31:58

- You have to be back at the hotel ready to leave at 9:00 p.m.

1:32:03

But before that, here are a bunch of daytime activities, for you, take your pick.

1:32:10

We're flying tonight boys. - [Vik] We're going home. - Get on a ride at FestaLandia as the main thing.

1:32:19

Oh we're going to a little team park. And get on the Benidorm cross,

1:32:26

go go-karting, buy presents for the other team. - I'm not buying them anything.

1:32:31

- [Vik] No. - Jump in the sea, brackets, Simon. (both laughing) - Build a sand castle.

1:32:36

- Yes. - Get hole in one at mini golf. - Yes. - Buy an inflatable to go in the sea with,

1:32:41

Instagram challenge. Hold on one at mini golf. - I didn't want to do the mini golf. - [Vik] Yeah.

1:32:47

- [Simon] All right boys, we're going to be on the bad holiday. I'm kind of happy right now. - I'm in my element, I'm drinking alcohol,

1:32:55

it's about three with a fish and chips and mashed peas.

1:33:01

- Wait, surely Josh hasn't hired us a yacht?

1:33:07

- Nah, no he wouldn't, he wouldn't. - Don't say that kind of stuff, don't say that kind of stuff

1:33:12

- Mate to you know how much it cost to hire? - Yeah, we do actually do nothing.

1:33:17

- That's not in the budget (laughing) - Let's go find out where we're going to be hiding. - Behind the bar maybe, we're about to reckon.

1:33:24

- You can go here easy. - Should I just reset like, hi boys, ready to go?

1:33:29

(laughing) so we've come up with a code word because we don't know like when exactly they'll be coming out.

1:33:35

So we got Josh some chips and he's really hungry, so what he's going to say is am buzzing to eat these chips.

1:33:41

Go give us a practise. This is how it's going to go. So my man's going to be hiding down here.

1:33:47

- And I'm talking to the guys, I'll be like, I'm buzzing to eat these chips. - That's the code word get up. (all shouting)

1:33:55

- All right the practise has really gone well, but we need to be careful because, they could potentially see us out there. So we need to really be chilling here,

1:34:00

from the get go. - We're just chilling here. We're just chilling down here, all calm. - Otherwise it's boat is paying wham,

1:34:06

I mean it's wham but then you have like the big show of boats.

1:34:11

- It's not like, it's not how you use it though, is it? (both laughing)

1:34:18

It's not how big it is, it's how you use it. A surprise people, we'll be like, what's up?

1:34:23

Look on there, the big boat we ain't got the energy. - Can you, can you let me on?

1:34:29

- No, no, no. - Sorry. I've got my hat still repping Orange team.

1:34:36

- [Tobi] You're not repping Orange team. - What do you mean? This is already Orange. - [Tobi] No, no, I'm Orange at heart. - I'm the only one left on the Orange team,

1:34:43

you guys are failures. - [Tobi] Harry give us a little skunk.

1:34:50

G, JJ, can you match it up? - That's poor.

1:34:59

- We're currently on a mission to find Josh, we can't find him. - Okay. So the guys are about to come,

1:35:04

they entering into their spot, these wind spot leading position, you got one here I didn't find a bar or you're at one

1:35:09

where the drive is supposed to be be, where is he? There he is. You're looking red.

1:35:15

- Please, after this, I want my rewards. - You want sun cream? - Yeah.

1:35:21

- All right you get sun cream after this, (laughing) look at this. - This is so tragic. - (laughing) Don't see them yet, I have you're right there,

1:35:27

am just going to try luck then and see what happens. You've been hiding around and people get it the wrong way.

1:35:37

- Can I get some sun cream please? - Risky it bro, risk it. - I need my reward early. - No, look this is what these amount of got is doing,

1:35:44

look at Lux right now. Look at me (Josh laughing)

1:35:51

- Wait, hang on a minute, ah.

1:35:58

- I did say it. - You did say it. - Nah, it's just going to be lunch or something. - Lunch on a boat maybe.

1:36:05

- Here we are, I mean, we are, we're in a Harbour. Look at that y'all, what the...

1:36:14

- They're going to come out of the corner. - So I'm looking for, you're looking for Josh.

1:36:19

- I can see Tobi, yes. - Mate, I think you're right, you know, I think you're right.

1:36:25

- Where this dude at? How many bedded men can there be here? - There he is.

1:36:31

(upbeat music) - Oh, you're a king, you're a king, you're a king. - Oh my God, Josh, Oh my God.

1:36:39

Josh, what's wrong with you? (Josh laughing) You're crazy. - What do you mean?

1:36:46

(upbeat music) - Why am I crazy?

1:36:52

- We're in a yacht. - Yeah. - So we have a massive house and a yacht.

1:36:58

- Got shout out to the world, shout out to the world, shout out to the world do it. - What's going on.

1:37:05

- They're going to be soo gassed. if they're not gassed we need new friends.

1:37:10

- Agreed. - Yeah, don't pull it JJ, just focus on that first one at a time, not the a hundred kg boy.

1:37:15

- Welcome. Welcome. Welcome. - Can you share your thoughts on down there?

1:37:24

- But like we already, got soo much. Oh my Gosh. - Come on, let's go upstairs.

1:37:31

- I want chips, I ship some gas to you, I'm sorry. - We're friends. - Yeah. I'm waiting for you so long,

1:37:38

it's time to buzz into this chips.

1:37:44

(team screaming)

1:37:58

- That's the best surprise ever.

1:38:05

(upbeat music) (all laughing)

1:38:16

- Holy shit, yo, you little motherfucker.

1:38:21

- Oh my God. - Yo.

1:38:27

- Who's ready for a big on the yacht.

1:38:34

- You dropped the yellow pants,

1:38:47

they're don't there don't worry. - [JJ] They're behind the black thing.

1:38:53

- [Harry] Oh, for sake. - [Josh] Maybe someone could fish it out. - [Harry] Oh, for sake.

1:38:59

- He got so gassed for real.

1:39:06

- So, we're just trucking our way through. We're going to a theme park, hopefully this one's open Josh, hopefully you've done home work.

1:39:15

- Oh my God. - How would you like it?

1:39:20

(Simon laughing) Boys we found it. but let's look to the right and it is. - [Vik] I thought you're joking.

1:39:26

- [Simon] FestaLandia. - Right. - So he said we're going here because the main one is closed.

1:39:33

- Josh sent us the two closed theme parks in two days. - Can we just walk around?

1:39:39

- We are. - Is this a thing? TripAdvisor, sign up Josh, they'll get you the best theme parks.

1:39:46

- Everything's closed. - FestaLandia. - Wait, we've actually just come to. - Hold on, hold up, hold up, let's get some completion,

1:39:53

let's get an achievement unlocked here, wait for it. All of a sudden, we've ticked something off, the list.

1:39:59

- Hell yeah, nice. All right. Well I'm going to go for the night.

1:40:05

Hey Josh, what you doing, man? - What are you doing? - So, lunch time is served, lunch is served.

1:40:11

- How are you doing? - I'm having a great time. - Are we having selfies?

1:40:17

- Yeah. - We actually? - Yeah. - Leave a comment, If you want to pint a side comment.

1:40:25

- Hey mate sounds like you're having a whale of a time in a busy place. I can hear something, It sounds like loads of fun.

1:40:33

Almost as much fun that we're having a FestaLandia. - Oh, you're in FestaLandia? - Yes. Honestly, mate

1:40:40

probably the most fun place on the Island, do you want to know why? - Yeah why? - Because it's fucking shut again, you shit house.

1:40:46

- Shut again? - Yeah. - Two days who closed amusement park.

1:40:51

There is no amusement, a closed amusement park. - And that's close as well.

1:40:58

- Yeah, we saw that on the envelope mate and you sent us to the side piece and the side piece is shut.

1:41:06

- Well what'd you think we're going to do? That's exactly where we go and we're going to go and play mini golf and go on fucking cross, all right?

1:41:12

- That sounds good. And build a sand castle yeah? - No, Josh, we're doing that later,

1:41:18

we're going to go and play in the sea, once we've ticked off all the other activities, no Josh, no one wants Sandy wet, shish Josh.

1:41:30

No one wants Sandy wet fee whilst playing golf or anything. So I'll build a fucking sand castle later

1:41:37

and I'll jump in to sea once we're back. - Hopefully the sea is not closed.

1:41:42

- We're going to get to the mini golf or it will be closed and then we're going to get to the cross. There's going to be no cross.

1:41:49

Because everything you've said so far doesn't exist. - It doesn't exist, Vicky did.

1:41:55

- She does yeah, you know, bye.

1:42:03

- [Simon] All right boys, so we're going to mini golf right now. One of our tasks is to try and find the Benedorm cross

1:42:10

I don't know whether you can see it, right at the top of that hill peak.

1:42:20

Yeah, you've got it. - All right, we have been to the Benidorm cross. ♪ Guessin they get it ♪ ♪ Cuz look at me now and then look at yourself in the mirror ♪

1:42:27

♪ I know they doubted my thesis, but they doubted Jesus ♪ ♪ And right now I'm making it clear ♪ ♪ Clearly these people don't know where they going ♪

1:42:32

♪ And lately I feel like the man with the map ♪ ♪ I got this shit out the mud, you can give me the word ♪ ♪ And I'll probably give it right back ♪

1:42:38

- Let's go, - You've been training for this common. - Let's go Harry

1:42:43

♪ Trying to find ways to get back to the mic ♪ (Team cheering)

1:42:51

♪ I know that a lot of you know ♪ ♪ Spill it, pieces of a poet ♪ ♪ Don't you know it, I'm the real thing baby ♪

1:42:58

- [Josh] He has been training for weeks for this. ♪ And if you don't make a dollar ♪ ♪ Then I couldn't make a real change baby ♪

1:43:10

- Do no arm. Harry do with no arms.

1:43:16

No arms. - [Josh] No arms - [JJ] Do with (JJ laughing)

1:43:23

that was sick. - It's too gracious.

1:43:29

- [Josh] Graceful. - Yeah graceful, graceful. - [Josh] I take gracious though, I take it, why not?

1:43:36

(team laughing) - That's the first one. - [Josh] All right take number two.

1:43:41

- That was first attempt, let's get it. - [Josh] Second attempt. - Take two. - There it is, there it is.

1:43:48

Put it up, my guy. (team cheering)

1:44:08

- That was sick. (team clapping) - [Simon] All right to tick another one off mini-golf. - [Vik] Before Simon takes his shot, Ethan's found a cat.

1:44:15

Don't get that on a luxury holiday, do yah? Black cat is mad chill.

1:44:21

- That's the only pussy he is getting a while. - Oh no, he got a girlfriend last night, what do you mean?

1:44:30

- Well, we actually going to do? - We're going fly boarding. - Jeez, have you done it? - Yeah.

1:44:36

- Come on, okay, today's let her off to go fly boarded. Harry's very, very excited, they got all the way down there.

1:44:44

So hopefully these are actually film footage and don't lose our cameras, we can pray.

1:44:50

- And guess he lost his phone, he lost his second phone. So this is what we have, we have the footage that I shot from the boat mile away

1:44:57

and you can't see anything, I'm sorry. How was that? - Mate it was fun, but we, we fought a few tides.

1:45:05

- Yeah we it saw, watching from up here. - It was so, so nice, so much fun though. So much fun.

1:45:11

- Did you enjoy it? - I've done it ages, man. - Oh, it was, it was so good.

1:45:19

- Vic, stay there, thick, bend down a bit and a bit like bend, bend, bend, bend blood crouches,

1:45:26

I'm taking pictures of you, and then this is your interest in a mate, one sec, one sec, (Vik laughing)

1:45:32

(soft music)

1:45:54

- This is your hobby. (soft music) - [Ethan] Not me.

1:45:59

- What are you doing? - Instagram challenge. I look most stable there.

1:46:06

(photo clicking) I don't have a lot of exposure to skills. - [Vik] What do you mean, my photography skills, man, that's a certified banger. - [Simon] I don't know, we'll see what Ethan thinks.

1:46:14

- Oh my. - I don't know. - King bear in the jungle.

1:46:19

- It's funny, but it looks good. - [Simon] All right, the task is to get whole in one. - This is the SideMen, hole in one challenge,

1:46:25

we're not playing mini golf there today. we've got a hole in one. - [Simon] Dude you're standing in the way, by the way.

1:46:30

(upbeat music)

1:46:37

- [Simon] Oh no, I was so ready for that. (upbeat music)

1:46:54

(team cheering) - We got the hole.

1:47:00

- [Ethan] We can leave this place. (team cheering)

1:47:05

- We got that whole in one. - I can't wait to leave. - Oh, let me not finish this, let's go. - How's someone written, win with an e here?

1:47:12

I reckon that as well and this goes like an year later

1:47:17

to the Benidorm for a holiday. All right we have decided, were going to go to the top of the mountain.

1:47:23

- What is spending the precious remaining funds we have on a taxi because it's hot. - It's too hot, We can't walk up,

1:47:29

I don't think Josh expects for us to walk up there. - The hill's called cardiac Hill. - Yeah. I ain't walking up that.

1:47:34

So you got a five minute cab journey and then this is where we get the Instagram banger. We've already got one. - Yeah, let's see what we can get for Instagram Challenge.

1:47:41

It falls on Instagram pop tag, (handle popping) pop, tag, pop tag, SideMen from here.

1:47:49

- All right long walk up. We just, we just walked the whole way. We didn't get dropped off, he just left.

1:47:56

I actually am not good, it's going to be a banger of an Instagram. - What you got Orange team? You ain't got no mountains, can you feel your face rubbed?

1:48:06

There it is boys. We made it.

1:48:11

All right Jeez. - [Vik] Nothing can stop me am all the way up. - [Simon] (Air whooshing) Is it just me

1:48:21

or that coast just looks like a pair of balls? (air whooshing)

1:48:31

Isn't it? Where's the cup. - Listen, you've got to be a fucking idiot. (Simon laughing)

1:48:43

- All right Insta is done, - [Simon] I think we've done the Insta challenge to come to the cross, so that's another one down so.

1:48:51

I think say it's time to get away, or what are you going to say? - [Simon] It's not karaoke still. We're going to go in the sea, build a sand castle

1:48:58

and get an inflatable.

1:49:04

- [Simon] What do we want? I think this one. This ring right here.

1:49:10

This, you'd fit in it and it looked good on you. - You're taking the Mickey?

1:49:15

- Oh might have to sense of that. I've I reckon we just get one of these. - Yeah rubber rings classic. - Yeah just a rubber ring, five euros.

1:49:24

That's the one you got? - Yeah. - Great, look at this dude. - [Vik] Look at this dude, he's Lord, Lord of the seagulls.

1:49:32

- [Simon] What are they? They doves? - [Vik] Seagulls. - [Simon] You messes with him, they all come after you.

1:49:38

He's like Batman with birds, he's Birdman. Hello? We like your yacht.

1:49:44

- Cheers. Look at the view behind us. - We can't say it, we can see JJ's arm. - You're upside down, wait you ain't even sideways yet.

1:49:51

- Tobi's gone to sleep but we though we just see what's up with you guys. - Yeah we chilling. - Yeah, what's up? - What have you guys been up to?

1:49:56

- How's your boat? - It's better than yours, we are in the boats and chill,

1:50:03

we got sea and all, one wave. We've also got another surprise for you guys.

1:50:08

- Yeah we got something else. (team screaming and hamming)

1:50:26

- Never speak to Simon again. (team screaming)

1:50:32

- Wait have you been in, have you been in this sea today? Have you been in the sea today? 'Cause you had a salty.

1:50:38

(team screaming) - I'm not going to lie, boys, I'm pretty off they sent me here,

1:50:44

I would rather been in Benidorm to be honest. The Sticky Vicky, oh is it called the Sticky Vicky?

1:50:50

- The Star Wars sex show. - Oh it had ss in it. - We get it had ss in it in that sentence.

1:50:57

- Yeah, we didn't know who Sticky Vicky was. - Oh no, I didn't even say that.

1:51:05

- All right, we'll catch you guys later enjoy.

1:51:12

- What did they say? - They were like oh there was a couple ss in that.

1:51:18

- They didn't even say it. (Josh laughing) - For fuck's sake. - All right we've chosen our spot,

1:51:24

this is where we're getting the flat waves. - Purple team castle. - The sand. We didn't get a castle so we're going to build our own,

1:51:31

- Do you know what we're going to do? We're going to do like a proper excavation, it mixed up. Yeah. I'm going to have my castle marked.

1:51:36

- [Simon] Okay. - Hey, I thought you were on. - Come on, what'd you want?

1:51:42

- You can film. You can document it. - We need it all the backwards, documented for this. Just cause we're obviously we need to occupy the lab,

1:51:49

planning division and staff - Can you get the, the planning division and stuff.

1:51:54

- That's all people do? Is it? Or how will they know that I'm down younger then

1:52:01

99% of the people. - Yeah but what were doing here bro isn't just a sand house bro,

1:52:08

were building an empire. - [Simon] A sand empire. - Yes. - [Simon] Okay. This is going to crumble, 100% crumble.

1:52:15

- Nah, bro. - [Simon] It looks good, It's decent. - You know what? We lost the shape. - [Simon] Yeah, the top.

1:52:21

Let's see Ethan's tactics. - I've done the magic. - [Vik] (laughing) That's the magic touch there.

1:52:27

- [Simon] You've just, you've just salt bae. - [Vik] He sand baed a tower. - [Simon] Vik, Vik, Vik, he's actually mugged you.

1:52:34

- [Vik] That's the best one. He smashed it. - (shouting) Purple team gang gang. - Let's do a house tour.

1:52:41

- For the Drawbridge there, you drive across the bridge drive up or what? What? Oh, there's a gate. And then we've got a little courtyard,

1:52:48

got gardens, gardens, vine yards, guard towers.

1:52:55

- [Simon] And Oh, he's kicked that, he's kicked that, - [Vik] All of a sudden he's realised he's had three bad holidays in a row.

1:53:02

- [Simon] We've just spent, we've spent like an hour building this.

1:53:10

We didn't even get a picture of it. - [Vik] Oh no. Well guys, we've done everything on the list except go kart

1:53:18

which we're not going to have time to go driving. The other one is going to sea with inflatable. - So the day's over, We've enjoyed it,

1:53:25

These guys coming off the boat. - You guys want an ice cream?

1:53:33

- Lux this is the first time we're going to see it. We know it's sick though, 'cause we know we're in the good team.

1:53:41

So, you don't say this is a banger? - I'll let it speak for itself.

1:53:47

- I've heard things like this is the best place that we've ever stayed. - It's (speaking in foreign language)

1:53:52

Well, that's what the woman says when she came in. - Is that like mother. - Yeah, oh okay.

1:53:58

- Is this the best place you've ever stayed be honest. - Yes. - Is this the best place you guys have ever stayed,

1:54:03

be honest. - [Tobi And Josh] Yeah. - Okay, cool, I'm buzzing now, you know. - Welcome.

1:54:09

- Damn, this place is wedge, what? Excuse me.

1:54:15

Yo, this place is huge. This is two storey, what floor did you park on?

1:54:21

That's what I ask. - Do you all say these aren't filled with water, quite disappointing, I might leave a four-star.

1:54:27

(all laughing) - What? Hello?

1:54:34

(JJ hamming)

1:54:41

- That's a hail Mary song? - Oh my God.

1:54:46

(group laughing) - Go out then look backwards.

1:54:51

- Stop here, stop here. - All right ready. - All right three, two, one, turn around yo.

1:55:00

- Holy shit. - It's got a mountain.

1:55:06

- Yo, This is ridiculous, you could play a Lebanon side on here. - And the to lean down there or Slack line.

1:55:13

- Wait a slack line? - Yeah but it's a bit of a hike. (group laughing)

1:55:19

- Oh the boys. - It's not warm. - It's not warm.

1:55:25

(air whooshing)

1:55:33

- It's a prank magic, it's gone.

1:55:40

- Goodbye, I'll see you back in England. Hey guys guess what I did?

1:55:45

- [Vik] I'm glad I'm really far away. I think it's safe to say we have conquered Benidorm. - Benidorm.

1:55:51

- We've done everything on the checklist. - Everything on the list takes up go-kart and we even went to the two places that were closed.

1:55:56

We hope you've enjoyed our very budget holiday. - We didn't get to the airport.

1:56:02

- Get to the hotel and freshen up a bit. - Wish us luck everyone.

1:56:08

- Oh my, what the fuck?

1:56:13

It could fit the whole gang. Jeez. - And it showers like any other bath?

1:56:20

(JJ laughing) - Oh you got to be kidding me.

1:56:25

- There's people in the world this rich. (Caleb singing)

1:56:35

- Oh my God it smells like Chlorine, is there a pool down here? Wait, you've only seen two pools I heard there's a the third. - There's a third pool.

1:56:41

- The third pool is inside, bro. They open the door for us.

1:56:52

Oh my quit as sunny as outside. - The biggest you've ever seen in your life

1:57:03

(water splashing) Now I can hear you.

1:57:09

- I'm so jealous, are you accepting the application for the SideMen?

1:57:14

(Team hamming)

1:57:20

(Josh whistling)

1:57:28

- Oh my God. I've spend like about 20 minutes trying to find you guys no one can hear the noise.

1:57:37

- Shall we watch my under performing YouTube videos on here? (JJ laughing)

1:57:42

- I wish I got more views.

1:57:48

- Big chest, big chest Cal.

1:57:54

Now you can do that. You can beat. - This is actual fucking suicidal.

1:58:00

(JJ laughing) - He has given up.

1:58:08

- Boys, the last meal. - That's our favourite English pitch there.

1:58:14

- We got arsenal on TV over there, sex on the beach. And we got some drinks with these yesterday.

1:58:21

- This is probably the best meal so far Cajun chicken. I'm really enjoying this. - Okay. Chicken wrap, little lasagna.

1:58:31

- Welcome to your final night. - Get change, as were off to the (team screaming)

1:58:52

- We need to at six forty. - What's the time now? - Six fifteen. - Okay 30 minutes. - I'm just going to get changed.

1:58:58

- Can I get another glass of gin and tonic please?

1:59:29

- Jesus, are you trying to eat for Simon, Ethan and Vic?

1:59:37

- Yes (JJ laughing) - Wait Ethan's here.

1:59:52

- He's doing the clapping you know, Let's go contest.

2:00:00

- What, what's going on?

2:00:07

- Who is going to win it though?

2:00:15

- My hands getting tired from holding the camera.

2:00:30

- After our night tonight, I have to go back and sleep on the sofa,

2:00:36

you know that one with the kitchen view?

2:00:41

- Did you do like. - He refused to do it. - We'll share it and he goes no,

2:00:48

for someone to take I was like, no will share it. he goes, I don't want to share, all right then He goes, put yourself on the couch.

2:00:56

- You played yourself? - No I got scammed. - How were you scammed? - It was share a bed or go on the couch.

2:01:02

- And I said the bed.

2:01:10

- Fully loaded.

2:01:20

- What was your favourite meal? What was your favourite? This one.

2:01:25

What is it? - Is it the Japanese.

2:01:31

- You look just into all of it. Life's good, life's good when you're on the good team.

2:01:38

- Harry, which was the meal? - It would be the, the Gary,

2:01:44

the fatty tuna, - Or not being on the purple team.

2:01:49

- My favourite meal is, honestly not being on the Purple team. (Team laughing)

2:01:55

- Do you know what his favourite drink is? - Simon's tears (team laughing)

2:02:01

- And your favourite meal Josh? - I don't know but I just sit on my own and eat.

2:02:07

- To be honest that does sound like a banger meal, to be honest. - It's diet, you know diet. - Anyways, my favourite meal was the white game, bye.

2:02:15

(soft music) - We made it. - Oh, I need a we.

2:02:22

- I need this bro. We finally get out of here.

2:02:28

What do you recommend doing right now? - I don't give a shit, I'm going home.

2:02:34

- Vic you excited to go home? - Well, you're not for another hour because we're delayed. - I didn't know how to vocalise how disappointed I am.

2:02:43

- We can't get on a flight for four and a bit hours.

2:02:49

Fun times at the airport. - Four and something hours. Josh is like, Oh, give me a little bonus.

2:02:56

You don't have to stay another night in Beni. Well, we're spending half of it at the airport

2:03:01

instead thanks. - There's literally like no difference, so we may as well have stayed.

2:03:07

- These are real stinky, fuck, not you.

2:03:14

(Simon laughing) - Ethan just texted, saying that that flight delayed an hour and 10 minutes.

2:03:19

(team laughing) - Oh that's so bad. - Meanwhile, you lot are just eating up.

2:03:25

Nobody, you know loading. - That's not cool. (team laughing)

2:03:33

- From all of you, every one of you, four from you, four from you for, four from you,

2:03:42

also four from you. - Exactly Pay respects.

2:03:48

- Are you all right there? Stop it, Stop it, this is the airport. (Ethan laughing)

2:03:55

- Hello darkness my old friend.

2:04:04

- The Water of Jesus.

2:04:09

Anyone at this table who falls asleep? Is going to lose the Logan.

2:04:16

- Why are you filming us? - Why are you filming me?

2:04:22

- Stop filming him, bro. - I'm his own film you without and you don't know why

2:04:30

Oh boy. - What's going on? Why is it lit? - Oh my day I told him I don't have any words.

2:04:37

- What?

2:04:42

- I don't have any words for this, - What's going on? - I am serving sir.

2:04:48

- It's amazing. - She's serving the drinks. - All right, here she goes.

2:04:57

- Oh my God, what are you going to do that upside down? Oh my God, mad.

2:05:03

- Thank you very much. - All right and now in only true tradition, you have to neck it.

2:05:08

Jeez. All right. Fair enough. Respect for that. - Yeah, man. More and more. Pour that up. Wait what?

2:05:17

- I'm so, all right, so you're gonna have to neck this grab it and neck it.

2:05:27

- Oh, there you go. All right. Three, two, one.

2:05:33

Oh wait, where are you taking.

2:05:41

- Have some. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no bro. You're doing yourself an injustice here Bro.

2:05:49

- It's all about down today. - I love that from you.

2:05:57

She just in the middle of our ground? Why are you here? - No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

2:06:05

- She's been nice enough to wait. - It makes no sense. It's so random why is she poring drinks upside down.

2:06:23

(upbeat music)

2:07:00

my face.

2:08:00

- How did you learn to do this? (upbeat music)

2:09:04

(team cheering)

2:09:15

Okay. That's the first part of a Josh's entertainment package. First part matting.

2:09:21

Yeah. All good things coming phrase. All right.

2:09:27

So if you'd like to follow me, the package will continue.

2:09:34

Welcome to the casino.

2:09:50

(upbeat music)

2:09:56

And for you to tell the service, this is not real gambling. This is just points. All right.

2:10:01

Not gambling Points. It's just not real money. It's not good.

2:10:18

(JJ screaming)

2:10:48

You are an absolute stinker boys. Boys were finally boarding.

2:10:54

We're finally boarding. We're finally boarding Vik. We can finally go home,

2:11:02

Oh my battery's about to die. Get your shoes on.

2:11:11

I got out.

2:11:32

You're not a good place. - No.

2:11:38

(baby crying) - It's 2:00 a.m,

2:11:53

It's going to be a great flight. (team chanting)

2:12:04

- I'm so happy I'm not trying to stay

2:12:15

Hi, we finally made it. We left Vik because he's sleep. We've done it.

2:12:21

We survived Benidorm and it's time to say goodbye.

2:12:26

- You'll get a train I'll get the cab. - Peace. - Goodbye I'm going home.

Transcript

0:00

- [JJ] Finally ladies and gentlemen, a brand new Tinder video, it feels like it's been so long.

0:05

I hope you're all as excited as I am because this video is a straight banger.

0:10

Now, before people start getting offended, this is all just for entertainment. Don't take life too seriously.

0:16

Live a little! Also, everyone in the room, including the camera crew, were COVID tested.

0:21

We all came out negative. So, you don't have to worry about that, too! Okay, now that we have that out of the way,

0:28

let's get on with the video! Just kidding. Make sure you subscribe. Okay, now let's go.

0:34

(mysterious music) - [Harry Pinero] Yeah, jiggle backs.

0:40

- [Josh] Huh? - [Harry Pinero] The jiggle backs. - [Filly] What happened there? - Natalie Allison, from London, and I'm 25.

0:46

- Hi. Hi, I'm JJ, 27. And... Is that a bit of discharge,

0:52

or are you just happy to see me? (laughter)

0:58

- [Josh] That was horrid bro. - Oh my god. We're going in. - [Chunkz] Yo, I can't watch this. - [Simon] Man said discharge!

1:06

- What do you reckon? - [Harry Pinero] Is that how he started it?

1:11

- [Josh] Ooh! - Yeah, fair, fair. Makes sense. - [Tobi] Are you okay?

1:17

- Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23. Are you this video idea? 'Cause I want to beat you like a dead horse.

1:23

(laughter) - Is it bad that I quite like it? (cheering)

1:35

- Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 28. I'd let you sit on my face, more than this face mask. (disagreeing noises)

1:42

- What, so he wants the back? (laughing)

1:53

- [Harry Pinero] Unlucks... unlucky! - Too soon, too soon. Too soon.

1:58

Gotta warm up first. - Hi, I'm Tobi, I'm 27, and I make my own clothes, wear my own garms.

2:04

So, I never get caught wearing the same outfit as anyone else.

2:09

- Oh.

2:14

- [Filly] That's two big YouTubers, that's embarrassing. (laughter) - I need more, it's not enough.

2:20

- You need more? (shouting in surprise) - [Chunkz] Gyal says she needs more!

2:26

- Free clothes for life! And tickets to London Fashion Week.

2:31

(shouting in surprise) (laughter) - You tried to throw us under the bus! That's what you get.

2:41

- Hi, my name is Chunkz. I'm 24, and I got more votes than JJ to win a MOBO.

2:46

- [Filly] Embarrassing, I'll be honest. - [JJ] Wait, what? - [Harry Pinero] He basically said...

2:51

He's got more clout than you. - Go on. (shouting in surprise) - [JJ] Ay, yo.

2:58

Ay, you know who I am, though! - [Chunkz] Sorry about that JJ.

3:05

- Hi, I'm Simon. I'm 28. And are you a toaster? Because I'd love to take a bath with you. - [Tobi] What the fu-?

3:10

- Are you okay? (JJ laughing)

3:17

- [Yung Filly] That bar was so sick, it went over my head. - [Harry Pinero] I get it. Unlucky. (Josh laughing) - [Simon] And she still said no?!

3:24

- [Natalie] All right, let's go. - Hi, my name's Harry, and I'm 29. Just wanna ask you a question. If I spit, would you swallow?

3:30

- What'd you reckon? - You direct me, and I'll know. (wink noise effect)

3:41

- [Filly] Yeah, well, my line ain't gonna work. (laughter) - [Harry Pinero] Welcome, welcome to the dark side.

3:46

- [JJ] Yeah, bro. - My name's Vik. I'm 25. And even in a global pandemic, your smile is the most contagious thing.

3:54

(everyone booing) (everyone shouting in surprise)

4:00

- [Filly] I'll be honest, that was sweet. - I don't think you can do better.

4:06

- Once again, sorry? - I don't think you can do better. - You don't think I can do better? Oh. My name's Ethan, I'm 25. Do you like sharks? 'Cause I've got a megalo-dong.

4:13

(laughter) - [Harry Pinero] Megalodong? (everyone laughing)

4:20

- [Tobi] Word play! - Have another one. - Have another one? - Yeah, I'm not feeling it.

4:26

- You know what? Let me just move. 'Cause that was sick. That was sick. Do you know what? I deserve better! I'm a king.

4:32

I'm a king. I'm a king, I deserve better, bro. She didn't get the bar.

4:39

- Hi, my name's Filly. I'm 25. Bears or jimmies, I don't mind. - You're so cute.

4:44

(laughter) - [Chunkz] Man said bears or jimmies. - Oh, go on, then.

4:50

- [JJ] How does that work?! What's going on? - [Harry Pinero] Bears or jimmies?!

4:58

- Did you hear what he said? - Maybe say it again. - No, see, look! That just goes to show.

5:04

It don't matter what I say. The presence alone... the presence alone!

5:11

(clapping)

5:18

- Is it bad that I can't even remember what you guys said? - [Simon] You didn't even hear what he said!

5:23

(laughter) - [JJ] Ay, yo.

5:29

- [Ethan] Ay, ay, ay. - I didn't get the shark joke. - [Tobi] Ah, okay.

5:34

- [Harry Pinero] Mega.. like. Length and strength! - Yeah, I'm more of a "keep it average".

5:42

- [Ethan] The average man!

5:48

- I don't blame you. I don't blame you now. - Ay, yo, discharge. It's natural. - [Tobi] Bro, bro.

5:55

- [Natalie] Yeah, we're not gonna acknowledge that. - [Harry Pinero] What about spit or swallow? - Spit or swallow? Just too soon. Just too soon.

6:01

- I've seen the future! - It's too soon. - Visionary. - Too soon. - I just hate myself.

6:06

- What did you say? I can't remember. - Don't worry about it. - I remember yours. Yours was clothes.

6:12

- Yeah, you don't like clothes? - I do, but... - [Tobi] You do? - [Harry Pinero] I just clocked she tried to finish us.

6:22

Goldie! - Hello, I'm Natasha, I'm 29, from London. - Hello. I'm Ethan, I'm 25.

6:28

Last year, I ran a marathon. This year, can I run through you? (clapping)

6:35

- Yeah, I'll have to say no. (shouting)

6:50

- I'm JJ, 27. And do you want to see something cute? - Yes. Show me.

6:59

- [Harry Pinero] Cop out! - You're too cute, it's gonna have to be a yes.

7:05

- No, the mirror is cute. - Oh. - You're not cute. - Well, I can see my reflection, that's why.

7:17

- [Harry Pinero] What's going on? - [Josh] You still got a yes?! - [JJ] Yeah. - Hi, my name's Chunkz, I'm 24.

7:23

And I scored the winning penalty at soccer aid. - Oh, well done. Yes. - [Tobi] I remember that differently.

7:29

- [JJ] Ay, no, you didn't. - [Ethan] Cap, cap!

7:34

- [JJ] You missed it! - [Tobi] Ay, run the clip!

7:41

- This ain't even mine, it's Darren Fletcher's! (laughter)

7:47

- My name's Vik, I'm 25. And I think honesty is the best policy.

7:52

Not, you know, mentioning any penalties or anything... But I actually scored a penalty, so..

7:57

Make of that what you will. - Yeah, it's gonna have to be a no. (shouting)

8:05

- [Tobi] He scored but he missed! He scored but he missed!

8:11

- Hi, my name's Filly, I'm 25, and my wood bends left. - [Josh] What did he say?

8:17

- Okay. - [Harry Pinero] "My wood bends left". Anything else? - No, it's just...

8:22

- Okay, it's going to have to be a no. (laughter) - [Harry Pinero] My wood bends left?!

8:29

- [Filly] Weird one, weird one. - [Harry Pinero] Unflipping real.

8:35

- [Filly] She must know it won't hit properly, that's why. - Hi, I'm Toby, I'm 27. And you remind me of man United,

8:41

because I want you on top of the table. - Come on! (shouting)

8:49

- I mean, you did say something nice. So I'm going to say yes. - [Tobi] Ay, champions! Come on!

8:59

- Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23. And there will only be seven planets left, when I've destroyed your anus.

9:05

(JJ laughing) - I mean... I'll have to say no, sorry.

9:10

- [JJ] Jesus! - [Vik] I respect the effort. - Unlucky brother. - Hi, I'm HP, like the sauce. I'm 39. Wanna clart?

9:20

(shouting) - No. - Do you know what it is, Harry? It's your corners.

9:28

It's the corners. - [Filly] Yeah, look, you fucked him now. He don't know what to say.

9:33

- My name's Harry Pinero. 079... - I don't have a phone to write it down, sorry.

9:40

- [Josh] Unlucky. - Wow. So where do we go from there? - Well then, I'm not going to memorise your number, so...

9:48

- So is it a yes or no for me? - Well, yes. You can give me you number later.

9:53

- [Chunkz] How did you win that? - That's what I'm saying! Listen, it's not all about what you say. It's how you look! (laughter)

10:00

- Ay, Simon, come here. - Ay? - Yeah, you might as well come here. - Oh, I've noticed!

10:06

(laughing) - Oh, shit! - What, am I not black?!

10:12

(laughing) - I'm black.

10:18

Your ting bends right. This is left wood! This is leftie here.

10:23

- Shall I just...? - No, go on, go on. - I'm Simon, I'm 28, and are you a piñata? 'Cause I need a blindfold before I hit that.

10:30

(shouting) - [Vik] Okay, now you can come here. - That's bad.

10:39

- Black is power! (laughter)

10:44

- Ay, Filly, what happened, man?

10:53

- [Harry Pinero] All right, I'm not going to lie... Unreal! - I'm not gonna remember all of you, 'cause you're a bit all like... bleugh.

11:00

- Forgettable! - No way, she called you "eugh"! - I was being you. - I just didn't get your humour, so that's why.

11:08

- Yeah, I was doing an impression. - Yeah, I love these guys.

11:13

- The blacker the berry the sweeter the ooh!

11:24

- Hello, I'm Ally, I'm 23 and I'm from London. - Hi, I'm Simon.

11:29

I'm 28, and you're nothing like KSI's boxing career, because you're a knockout. - [Harry Pinero] Jheez!

11:36

- I don't know who KSI... KSI? (shouting)

11:42

- It's okay, it's okay, it's okay. - She's in our demographic! - It's okay. I don't mind it. It's okay. It's all right.

11:54

- What was your name? - Simon. - Hi Simon. So can you tell me about yourself?

12:00

Let's have a chat! - [Chunkz] You've got a gyal, chill out. - I don't know if that's part of the thing.

12:06

- [Chunkz] I swear you've got a gyal. - [Harry Pinero] Run! - [Josh] Run! (laughter)

12:11

- [Ally] What happened? Excuse me? - It's okay, it's okay.

12:16

My name's Harry, I'm 29. - [Ally] Yeah. - Sorry you had to go through that. - [Ally] Okay. - I filled up my car this morning,

12:21

I've still got space for more. - You filled up your car, still got space... - I filled up my car this morning.

12:27

And I've still got space for more. - I don't actually understand the joke.

12:32

- [Tobi] Are you talking about the width? - Don't you get it? I filled up my car this morning... - [Filly] I'll be honest, brother. Brother.

12:38

Next one! - [Simon] HP with the sauce!

12:45

- [Chunkz] HP with the sauce. - Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23. When I first saw you, I said Mash'Allah,

12:51

and ever since, I've been saying Insh'Allah. (laughter and clapping)

12:57

- Elite! Elite! Elite, elite! - Right, can I just start by saying,

13:02

can you not walk away from the conversation? Because I've had two people walk away from me, but I'm not done with the conversation.

13:08

I just think it's very rude. - Wait, wait. You wanted me? - Well, I didn't get a chance to get to know you guys. Just walked away from me. - See what you lot done? Peer pressure!

13:14

- Secondly, I'm not getting anyone's jokes. What was it? What'd you say? Am I being thick?

13:21

- It's... Don't worry, don't worry, don't worry. - I think you're very sweet, yeah, you're lovely. - [Harry] Thank you. - [Harry Pinero] How?!

13:27

- Right, sorry, can I have you guys back, 'cause I actually didn't get... - [Harry Pinero] Let's go together. - Okay, yeah.

13:33

- So what did you get about my joke? - You said something about a car, then you were doing this, like, movement?

13:39

- I was trying to gesture what I was trying to fill up. - Why was it like down here? - Come on, use your brain, darling.

13:44

- Was it a penis joke? - Yes, it was, but I was using terminology, you didn't get it. - I didn't get it. Okay, right. - [Simon] What about mine?

13:50

- What was your joke? The KSI thing? And then I asked you to tell me about yourself. - Well, it's a Tinder profile. So I can't talk more.

13:58

- Okay. - Like, swipe. - Yeah, but the thing is, with Tinder, I would look at, like, their jobs... - Yeah, I'm not interested.

14:05

(shouting) - [Harry Pinero] Couldn't care less. Talk too much.

14:12

- You know what? If I had a chewing gum, I'd give it to her, 'cause her breath smelly as well. If I had a chewing gum,

14:18

'cause what I was smelling over there wasn't elite. (laughter) - [Simon] What's he doing? What's he doing?

14:27

- [Ethan] Ay, ay, ay...

14:33

- Harry! - [Harry Pinero] What'd you mean?

14:39

- Leave him. He's sour because he's out. - Ay, Filly, brush your sides.

14:45

(laughter) - [Ethan] Don't touch it, don't touch it. - [JJ] Ignore him, he's a troll.

14:52

- Cover the sides, it's flipped up. - No, you're good. - Okay. - Hi, my name is Vik, I'm 25.

14:58

And are you a tree? Because when I see you, all I think is... leave. - [Tobi] Huh?

15:05

- [Ethan] Ay, you lot! - You, my friend, are unreal.

15:16

- If I had someone like you, I'd make you my everything, my absolute world. - Ay, you're falling in love, stop!

15:22

(shouting) - You deserve the best! - Come here, come here. Yeah. Come on.

15:28

- Is that a yes? - [Ally] Yeah, go on. (celebrating) - I'll be honest, you deserve the best.

15:34

- Thank you, so do you, that was so nice. - [Filly] Thank you baby. (laughter)

15:40

- Hi, I'm Josh. I'm 28. I recently recovered from COVID. Can I inject you with my vaccine?

15:46

- [Tobi] Oh, whoa. - Yeah, you know what, I actually really want a vaccine. So yes.

15:53

Pro-vaccine! - This man is fucking hot singles in your area. Sign up now.

15:59

(laughter) - I see the desperation, so yes! - [Harry Pinero] Yeah, she's not well, she's not well.

16:06

Something's wrong. - Hello. - Hi. I'm KSI. Hi. I'm KSI.

16:13

- Oh. I know you! - Oh, you do? - Yeah! Boxing. - [Simon] You didn't about four minutes ago.

16:19

- Boxing. - Yeah, go on. Yeah. - [Filly] 'Cause she knows him? What, the name holds that much weight?!

16:26

- Hang on a second, four minutes ago, she said "Who's KSI?" - Ay, she knows now.

16:32

I'm sure she heard all my tunes. All of them! - Hi. I'm Chunkz. I'm 24, and you're...

16:40

- [Ally] Ally. - Gorgeous. - Oh, sorry, I just interrupted. - Are you French by the way? Because "Ei-fell" for you.

16:46

- [Harry Pinero] Wait, it's Eiffel Tower, though. - "Eifell", "Eifell Tower", get that one? - [Ally] Oh, yeah. - Yeah, yeah! So, over there, yeah?

16:52

- Okay! (clapping)

16:58

- Three out of three, baby!

17:05

- I got three out of three, you know what I mean? - Hi, I'm Tobi. I'm 27.

17:11

Most couples love finishing each other's sentences. I just want to finish in you. - Good one!

17:17

- Tobi, Tobi! - It's a bit grim, I'm not going to lie.

17:23

A little bit grim. - What about making a baby is grim? Listen, if you're not involved like that,

17:28

then I'm not interested. - Can I have you back?

17:35

- [Harry Pinero] Ay, Simon, she wants you! - [Chunkz] Tell her you've got a gyal! - [Ally] When you.. when you..

17:41

- I'm just very nervous, okay? I'm just very nervous. - Did you walk away with him, 'cause it was like, peer pressure?

17:47

- No, 'cause we're an item. - 'Cause you what? - We're a couple. - Oh... So why are you on Tinder? What's this about?

17:53

- [Harry Pinero] (mockingly) Tinder! - He has a girlfriend. He has a girlfriend. (shouting)

17:59

He has a girlfriend. - [Tobi] Ay, 6ix9ine! - Do you have a girlfriend?

18:04

- I don't, no... I do! I do! I do! I do! (shouting)

18:13

- [Ethan] He didn't even wanna lie at the camera!

18:19

- I'm not taking that! I realised quick.

18:26

- I felt... Sorry, what's your name? - Me? Tobi. - I didn't like the statement. I thought that was very presumptuous.

18:32

So, that was a no. You were a little bit rude! Just walked away from me, couldn't handle me chatting.

18:38

- Sorry, someone's talking here. Who was rude? Start again, we didn't hear. Sorry, start again. Who was rude?

18:43

- Sorry, what's your name? - Harry. - Harry. He can't handle an intelligent lady.

18:48

(shouting) He didn't like me talking. - You let me know when she comes in there. (shouting)

18:54

You let me know!

19:00

(clapping)

19:05

- [Filly] Wow. This is health and wealth. - [JJ] Man's in love again. - This is vitamins and callaloo.

19:11

- Hi, my name is Amore. I'm 21, and I'm from East London. - Hi, my name's Filly. I'm 25.

19:18

Why don't you sit on my lap, and we talk about the first thing that pops up. (laughing) - [Josh] Old school.

19:23

- [Chunkz] Re-used, re-used. - Yeah, I'm going to go yeah. (clapping) - [Filly] I'm just direct and honest.

19:28

- [Harry Pinero] Google! Google! - [Tobi] Eco-friendly, recycling the lines. - Hi, I'm Josh. I'm 28.

19:33

I'm here to chew bubblegum and scran ass. And I'm out of gum. - (laughing) No.

19:38

- [Tobi] Ouch. - [Ethan] Ah. - Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23. Your breasts look heavy,

19:45

do you need me to hold them for you? Sorry. Sorry. (laughing) - Come here bro.

19:55

- [Simon] You didn't believe that. Started laughing halfway through!

20:02

- Hi, I'm JJ, 27. Hi, I'm JJ, 27. And there's something gorgeous about your eyes.

20:07

Oh, that's it. My reflection. Yeah. - [Ethan] I didn't like that. - [Harry Pinero] You're a legend!

20:16

- [Josh] Turn around. - [Ethan] That was grim. (laughing)

20:21

- My name's Vik, I'm 25. And is your name trigonometry? Because I have no interest in doing you.

20:29

- [Tobi] No! - [Chunkz] Why are you cockblocking yourself?

20:34

- [JJ] What the fuck?

20:40

- [Ethan] Ay.

20:46

- He didn't even try! - I'm sorry about that. I'm Tobi, I'm 27. I have to ask. Orange juice or apple juice?

20:53

- Orange juice. - Yeah, allow it. (shouting)

20:59

- Hi, I'm Ethan, I'm 25. Do you want kids? - Yeah, eventually. - Shotgun first. - Yeah, sure.

21:05

(clapping and laughing)

21:12

- Hi, my name's Harry Pinero. I'm 29. I wish I gave you hot chocolate. 'Cause you are what you drink.

21:18

(gasping) - [Josh] I didn't like that look, bro. (laughing)

21:23

- I don't think she liked that one. - I'll still give him a try. - [Harry Pinero] You don't think she liked what?

21:29

I'm over here, while you're all over there. Sidemen!

21:35

- Are you lost? 'Cause heaven's a long way from here. - Go on.

21:41

(clapping)

21:52

- Tobi... just 'cause I like orange juice. - [Tobi] Apple juice gang for life! - And not apple juice, so no thanks.

21:57

You made an inappropriate comment about my chest. - Yeah, sorry about that. - So, I was like, no thanks.

22:02

You just made up your own ass comment, so I was like, no.

22:08

- I will be up ass, if that's what you want. - Not mine, sorry. It is what it is.

22:14

- I don't even really remember your line. - I said that I was here to chew bubble gum and eat ass. - Oh yeah, and scran ass. That was a no.

22:22

You didn't even try. What? - I'm still trying to recover from the last one. - [Amore] What happened? - I said I didn't have a girlfriend for a second, so...

22:28

- Yeah. Okay. And then, you also just weren't interested, so I was like, well, I guess I'll reject him.

22:34

- That's his attitude today. - Awful attitude, so I was like, it is what it is. - [JJ] Violence. - [Josh] Thank you.

22:40

- [Harry Pinero] Hello, hello, hello, hello. - Hello. - [Harry Pinero] Okay. She's sophisticated.

22:46

- Trying, trying. Hi, I'm Perdie. I'm from North London and I'm 28.

22:54

- Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23. Are you sure you're a muggle? 'Cause that ass is magical.

23:01

(laughing) - That's the first someone's ever complimented my ass, so yes.

23:06

(clapping) - Hi, I'm Tobi, I'm 27 and fun fact about me.

23:14

I have 70 hobbies: 69 and fishing.

23:20

- What's the last bit again? - [Harry Pinero] She's not having that. - 69 and fishing. - And? - Fishing. - You know when you have to repeat your jokes?

23:28

- No, I'm so confused. - She doesn't get fishing. - I'm Ethan, I'm 25 and I'm no dentist,

23:35

but I can give you a filling. - Oh. - Good one, what a solid one!

23:41

(dissapointed sighs) - I'm sorry. I've got quite a few fillings, to be fair.

23:47

- She didn't even know what fishing is, bro. - My name is Vik, I'm 25. And are you the sun?

23:52

Because I'd prefer it if you stayed 93 million miles away from me. - No.

23:57

- [JJ] Are you okay? Are you all right? - He walks off like it's The Weakest Link.

24:08

- [JJ] Who hurt you? - [Filly] I quite like it that doesn't try it. - [Ethan] No, but he's not "not trying", he just insults them.

24:14

- Guys, if you don't mind. Sorry. Hi, my name's Harry Pinero. I'm 29. I like apple pie, but I'd love to see you cream pie.

24:22

- [Ethan] Oi, oi. - [Simon] Harry, that's disgusting. - [Filly] Harry, that's nasty. - You're so serious, no.

24:29

- Dayum. (laughing) - I just got looked up and down!

24:35

- Hi. My name is Chunkz. I'm 24 and I like to sing. ♪ Fly me to the moon ♪

24:40

- [Harry Pinero] Oh, he's singing. - [Chunkz] ♪ Let me play amongst the stars ♪ ♪ Let me see what spring is like on ♪

24:48

♪ A-Jupiter and Mars ♪ - Off you go. That is so beautiful.

24:54

(laughing and clapping)

25:01

- Ay, you know what, I'm gonna start losing on purpose. - I'm JJ, 27, and obviously Chunkz can sing,

25:09

but I can rap. - Let's go. - [Josh] Go on, then. ♪ Gotta lotta time for the one that I'm watchin' ♪ ♪ Amazon Prime if you wanna get something ♪

25:16

♪ No valentine but my heart beat pumpin' ♪ - [Filly] Oh, you lot are violating. - [Ethan] I don't like... - ♪ Now the room poppin' ♪ ♪ Got plenty views if you hang around me ♪

25:23

- [Ethan] You lot are violating! - [Filly] I'm supporting, I'm supporting! They were laughing at you, I'm supporting. - [Josh] That looks sarcastic, though.

25:28

- Okay, let me try again. - [Ethan] You're violating him! - All right, let me try again, let me try again.

25:35

I'm JJ, 27, and you have the perfect face. - For? - For radio, but...

25:41

(shouting) - So rude!

25:49

If you'd stuck with the rapping, you might've made it the other side. - Yeah, shit. (laughing)

25:57

- Hi, I'm Simon. I'm 28. And do you want 12 inches of dick tonight? 'Cause we could have sex four times. (laughing and clapping)

26:03

- [Chunkz] That was a good one! - [Harry Pinero] There you go, Simon.

26:12

- Hi, I'm Josh. I'm 28. If the guy behind me gets the maths question right, can I- can you say yes? English?

26:18

(shouting) - [JJ] You fucked it!

26:26

- [Filly] You lot are trying to kill me! Filly? Maths? Everyone knows me and maths... problem.

26:35

But I ain't gotta do the maths one now. All right, keep it down, please.

26:41

(speaking Spanish) - Oh, he's done that one. - [Chunkz] He's rinsed that one.

26:46

- ¿Qué? (speaking Spanish) - No. - ¿Qué pasa?

26:51

- No speaking the English very well, muy grande, nueve inches.

26:56

(laughing)

27:06

- [JJ] Muy grande, nueve? - Nine. - Okay, cool. And it bends left.

27:11

(laughing) - Oh.

27:18

Yours is rude. - Fair. I fucked up. - [Perdie] Yep. - His rapping was dry. - [Tobi] You don't know what fishing is.

27:25

(laughing) - Ay, you wanna fight? I'll see you in the ring. Let's go, nah, nah, nah.

27:32

Go on bro! - I can't remember what you said... fillings!

27:37

Yeah. I don't need any more. - [Ethan] That was good! It was good. - And actually, really scared of going to the dentist, so... - I can make that a better experience!

27:44

(laughing) My fillings are different.

27:49

- [Filly] I can't lie, he is smooth. - [JJ] Smooth! - I ain't got another line. I'm just saying, I can make it a better experience for you.

27:55

- Like veneers. - I can be... - [Simon] Just say yes! Bro, just say yes!

28:01

Just say yes! - Yes, yes. Veeners. Yeah. - Okay, let's go! (cheering)

28:06

- That's all you gotta do. - Mine was nice. - At the beginning, I think you were being nice.

28:13

- I tried to show you a different language, a different culture. - Yeah, different shapes and sizes. - [Filly] Yeah!

28:18

(laughing) Good for ya. - Darling, I'll tell you one thing. You're missing out on a nine inch, bending left.

28:23

- Beckham?! (laughing and clapping)

28:29

That was hard. - What did you think of Harry?

28:34

- You were just so serious. And you gave me the look up and down, like I'd said something awful. - I was looking at your brilliant swag to be honest.

28:41

You came here looking very fantastic, and I just wanted to leave something in... you.

28:47

- Look at her, she loved it. She went "huh"! - She does. - Stop it! - And what'd you think of KSI, his rapping? - Yeah.

28:52

- If you'd rapped and just stuck with the rapping, we might have been somewhere. - [Ethan] We told him that for years! (laughing)

28:59

- [Filly] Who laughed? When you said rapping, someone laughed. - Top 10, what was that? Top 10!

29:06

Continuously. - Ay, round of applause for KSI. (clapping)

29:12

It's not easy. - Come on. - That's quite an even spread right here. Four, five.

29:19

- Can I ask you a quick question? Out of all of us, which one would you really take home, if you had to? - For a dirty sesh.

29:24

- Dirty one. - Just answer it quick, you're thinking too much. - No, but purely because my niece apparently

29:29

really likes you, Harry. - Oh, oh, okay. - But she's like, your biggest fan from New Zealand... so.

29:36

- Wait, so you would fuck him because...? (laughing)

29:44

What's going on? What's going on?

29:51

What's going on? - Do you know how funny he is? - Is she filming, like? Yo.

30:00

- [Tobi] Whoa, whoa, whoa, chill. - [Ethan] Thanks very much! Thank you! - Personally, I'd go with the serenading,

30:06

'cause I thought that was very romantic. - [Simon] Jheez! Go on, then. - [Josh] Chunkz winning! - [Simon] Not a top ten, but we'll take it. - [Chunkz] Not a top ten, but we'll take it,

30:12

thank you very much. Show me hate, come on. - [Filly] Would you clart tomorrow?

30:19

- [Chunkz] Yeah, yeah, tomorrow. - [Josh] What about today? - No, today I'm busy.

30:24

Who's that then? - [Harry Pinero] There she is! There she is, welcome! - [Filly] Wakey wakey!

30:29

- Hi, my name's Amy, I'm 27, from Surrey. - Hi, I'm JJ, 27, and yeah,

30:35

- Hi, I'm JJ, 27, and yeah, I guess you are proof that God can make mistakes.

30:40

Want me to fix it? - No. - [Josh] You wanna fix it?

30:47

- [Filly] He couldn't say that! - [Chunkz] Wallahi he said that. Wallahi.

30:53

- Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 28. Do you drink soda? Because you look soda-licious.

30:59

- As cheesy as that was, yeah. - [Josh] Come on! (laughing) - I'm Vik, I'm 25.

31:05

And girl, you're a 10! On the pH scale, 'cause you look kind of basic. (shouting)

31:11

- [Josh] That's unreal. - What's happening? I don't get Vik. - Ay, Vik is on smoke tonight. (tense music) Vik is on smoke tonight.

31:17

- I wanted a boyfriend anyway, not a son. Go on. (shouting)

31:23

- You can't stay here bro, you've gotta leave. You can't stay here. You gotta leave.

31:29

- [Simon] That was sick. - Hi, my name is Chunkz. I'm 24. Can you read this? - Essentials.

31:35

- That's what you are to me. - Aw. - Ooh, thank you so much. Great. It's just a great day for me, I'll be honest.

31:40

- [Ethan] Ay, well done, man. - [Filly] She won't even lipse you though, 100. - [Chunkz] Why?

31:48

Just don't wanna bang him on his mouth. - Hi, I'm Simon. I'm 28. And are you from the Philippines?

31:53

Cause I'd love to fill you with my peen. - Dirty.

31:59

- Hi, I'm Toby, I'm 27. Do you know what would look good on you? Me.

32:07

- Gotta disagree. - Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23.

32:12

And just like my slippers in the Masjid, you stole my heart, and I'll never get it back.

32:18

- What? - I don't know what that means, really, but I'll let you go where you want. (protesting shouts)

32:25

- [Chunkz] That was a legendary one! - Hi, I'm Ethan. I'm 25. You look like you're suffering from a lack of vitamin me.

32:33

- No, I'm good. I take supplements. - [Simon] That made me a bit... - That was worse than my one.

32:38

- [Ethan] Do you know what, we've gotten to that point now. We're past the halfway point. - She don't like you Harry, I'm telling you. - You what? - She don't like you.

32:44

(laughing) I can tell by the way she looks at you, she don't like you. - Do you like me? - Yeah.

32:49

- Do you just want to speed this up, and just direct me to... - Yeah, go on, then. (clapping and laughing)

33:00

- I appreciate you so much! (clapping) - She felt sorry for you, that's why you're there. - [Harry Pinero] Nah. It's based on looks.

33:07

- Cringe. Cringe. You're throwing your mate under the bus, so, nah.

33:13

And the other two, I can't really remember what was said. - Oh my god. She came in with the shotgun!

33:23

- [Josh] I rate that. - What did you man say? Why were you cringe? - Yours was a fucking soda line! - Yeah.

33:28

- And it worked! (laughing) - I'm over here, bro. Can't talk to me. Can't hear you.

33:34

- Oh, she likes tall guys. - She likes tall guys, except Simon.

33:39

What did you say? - I hit her with my peen. - And that's weird, 'cause you only like black girls as well Chunkz, so that's mad weird.

33:45

(laughing) Next one, next one, next one. - Hold on, ay. Chatting shit!

33:53

I love all kind of gyal! Ay, ay. I love all kind of gyal, he's chatting shit.

33:59

Does that look good? That's a sour move. That's sour. - [Filly] Sorry about that. - I like white gyal as well.

34:05

- [Filly] Yeah. - [Harry Pinero] Hello, hello, hello.

34:10

- Hi, I'm Ellie. I'm 23 and I'm from Hertfordshire. - Hi, I'm Chunkz, I'm 24.

34:15

How many siblings do you have? - Two. - Yeah, I just can't wait to meet my in-laws. When can I meet them?

34:21

When can I meet them, do you reckon? - Yeah, tonight, they're actually around tonight. - [Chunkz] Yeah? I can meet them? - Yeah, yeah, go on then.

34:26

- [Harry Pinero] He keeps showing! Is this a record or something? - [Filly] What does he say? - [Harry Pinero] This is a record!

34:32

- [Ethan] He always wins, 100%, in Tinder videos. - [Chunkz] I'm not gonna try for 100%, I'm gonna relax after, don't worry. Thank you very much, I'll meet them after, yeah?

34:38

- Yeah, yeah. - [Chunkz] Beautiful, lovely. - Hi, I'm Tobi. I'm 27.

34:44

Just wondering if you can swim? - Yeah. - Okay, I need someone to teach me how to swim. I'm trying to learn the breaststroke.

34:49

- [Chunkz] Breaststroke! - [Ellie] How tall are you? - Not tall enough clearly, so I'll just go this way.

34:55

- Ay, you two go. You two go. (JJ laughing)

35:00

- I didn't say anything! I might like short people. - Okay, I'm going that way! - You didn't wait for me to answer!

35:06

I might like dwarves, you never know. (shouting) - Yeah, yeah! Take those heels off and start talking.

35:14

Take those heels off! - [Tobi] This was your fault! I don't want to do these videos, bro, I told you.

35:20

- That's three inches of confidence, lads. I'm seeing three inches of confidence. (laughing)

35:26

- I like gingers though, so it's all right. So you can get back. - Ay, do you know what, I deserve better than being referred to as a dwarf, so hold that.

35:32

- [Tobi] Amen, amen! (laughing) - Yeah, yeah, she said yeah. All right, sorry. That was my dying mum.

35:40

She hates it when I lie. - You can't say that. - I'm Simon, 28. How are you?

35:47

- I'm good. Go on then. - He said that was his dying mum on the phone. - [Filly] What'd you say? - [Josh] And then she said yes.

35:53

- What's happening there? Oh, hello. Hi, I'm Harry. I'm 23.

35:58

You look fabulous... for your age! (laughing)

36:04

- Make her hold it, bro! - You're really sweet, but you look like my ex-boyfriend.

36:13

- [Chunkz] No-one looks like Wroetoshaw, don't lie. - Hi, I'm Josh. I'm 28. Are you a sea lion?

36:18

I can see you... I can see you "lying" on my bed tonight. (laughing)

36:24

- You saved it, go on, then. - [Josh] That was close! - Hi, my name is <PRESIDIO_ANONYMIZED_PERSON>, I'm 29.

36:30

You look like your pussy farts. - [Ethan] Ay!

36:36

- No! (laughing)

36:41

- It's a good thing, though! - Hi, I'm Filly, I'm 25 and very different to Harry.

36:48

I really want to get to know you, and... - [Chunkz] He don't like white gyal! - You said it, on the way here.

36:54

- I swear he said he like black gyal. - Yeah, yeah. You said you like girls with big juicy backs.

36:59

That's what you said. No disrespect to you, darling. - [Chunkz] I can't wait for you.

37:04

- I don't like to see my friend lie. - [Chunkz] Yeah, that's not right. (laughing)

37:13

- [Filly] Man said I told you on the way here? You lot are liars. Nah, you lot are liars.

37:20

You lot are liars. Love white women, by the way. (laughing) - I'm JJ, 27.

37:26

And could you just turn to your side real quick? Nah. - [Ethan] Ay, you're a dickhead. You're a dickhead. - [Tobi] I'm going home.

37:32

- See, even though we had debacle, I'd never do that to you. - Come back then. - [Ethan] I'd never do that to you. - Hello, my name's Ethan, I'm 25.

37:39

And like I said, I'd never do you like that. - Go on, then.

37:49

- [Tobi] She deserved that, she called me a dwarf. (laughing)

37:54

- [JJ] Ay, yo, I got you Tobi. - [Ethan] The game's the game! - I'm sorry, do you want another try?

37:59

- No, I don't! I deserve better! You know the cat meme, when she...

38:07

- To be fair, some of them, I didn't actually say no to. I didn't say no to you, didn't I?

38:15

I mean, some of the jokes, some of them just aren't funny, are they? - Like whose in particular?

38:21

- Just be direct, come on. - Yours. - Mine was an observation! Mine wasn't a joke, it was an observation.

38:27

- To be fair, the rest of you... I was a bit harsh on you, 'cause it's not your fault you look like my ex,

38:32

so you can go over there. (clapping)

38:37

- [JJ] So you still like your ex? - We're the same age, it's fine.

38:42

- Oh, okay, fair. - Big man, she called me a dwarf, and you're doing this? (laughing)

38:49

- Ay, yo. Thank you! - [Harry Pinero] Hello, hello. - Hello, hello.

38:56

- [Filly] Rah, this is health and wealth. - [Harry Pinero] This is health and wealth. - [Chunkz] Wow, I'm actually taking you serious. - [Filly] This is... this is... yeah.

39:02

- Hi, I'm <PRESIDIO_ANONYMIZED_PERSON>, I'm 25, and I'm from London. No, I'm not! I'm 24! My birthday's in May, so, sixth.

39:12

- Okay. You look shy. Your breath stinks. - Are you talking to me?! - No, I'm gonna tell you something about yourself, now.

39:18

My name's Harry Pinero. I'm 29. And I'm here to do my bit for the community. So, I'm here to give you some chewing gum.

39:24

- Oh. Get out of here. - [Filly] You saying her mouth stinks?

39:30

- You're unruly today. This is not right, bro. - Do you know what it is? I'm here to do my bit for the community. - [Filly] Yeah, no, you're rude, man.

39:36

- How dare she talk to my friends like that, with that smell mouth? - [Ethan] Ay!

39:43

- [Filly] His face is hilarious, innit? Look at his face!

39:54

- Hi, I'm Josh. I'm 28. My girlfriend said to pick the prettiest girl from today, and ask her for a threesome.

40:00

So I'll wait for the next girl. (shouting) - I didn't even say no! I'm done!

40:09

- [Chunkz] She's crazy, I like her. - I'll be honest. You seem like a lovely girl, man. I'd love to get to know you. My name is Filly.

40:16

(laughing) I'll be honest, you're not in the best position now. Someone was rude to you, the last two people.

40:23

I just reckon that out of love, let me go through and me and you can talk about...

40:28

I'll be honest. Look at me. Am I attractive? (shouting) - [Simon] Oh, the pause! The pause!

40:35

- I can't lie, she done you dirty, my boy. - [Josh] You deserve better! - [Chloe] I didn't say anything, sometimes silence is good!

40:42

- I'm Ethan, I'm 25. Your legs are like an Oreo. I want to split them apart, and eat the good bit in the middle. - You can't even reach my ankles.

40:47

(tense music) - [Simon] Oof! - [Harry Pinero] Come here. Just join. It's an elites numbers club over here.

40:55

- [Tobi] It's quite easy to get in. - I'm JJ, 27 and how tall are you? - 5"10.

41:00

- 5"10? What the fuck! (everyone laughing) I'm never going to survive.

41:06

- Also, I'm KSI. (shouting)

41:14

- [Filly] She knows the p's, she knows the p's. - [Harry Pinero] She knows he's a millionaire. - [Ethan] She smelled bread, she smelled bread.

41:21

- She'd be dumb not to pick him. I'd fucking pick him! (everyone laughing)

41:28

- Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 24. Are you a Pokémon? Because I'd love to Pikachu naked.

41:34

(laughing) - [Filly] He's the best! Harry's the best.

41:41

Yeah, he is the best. - My name's Vik, I'm 25, and you kind of remind me of Newton's laws.

41:47

Not perfect, but good enough. - [Ethan] Ay! Ay!

41:56

- I offered to make sure your mouth smells good. - No, you were insinuating my mouth smelled bad!

42:01

(tense music)

42:08

- I'm Chunkz... guys, please just be respectful. - Stop wearing what I'm wearing!

42:14

- You copied me! Hi, my name is Chunkz, I'm 24. And if you swipe right, I'll swipe my card at Selfridges, wallahi.

42:19

- Oh, what about Nando's? - Girl, I got black card! - [Ethan] Oh, he's done it!

42:25

(cheering) - [Vik] He's done it!

42:30

- Yes, yes, yes! - Hi, I'm Simon, I'm 28.

42:36

And how much to bring all of us to the "yes" side? (shouting)

42:42

- The money! - I rate that! - She said yes to you fam! - I got fame!

42:51

- I got some real issues with this. - I'll give you another chance, come. - No, no, it's cool, 'cause I reach your ankles.

42:57

Enjoy, enjoy that. I hope you have a great time. - I've got a foot fetish.

43:07

- [Chunkz] Who sucks toes? (laughing)

43:17

- [Filly] Ay, you've got a lovely face, by the way. - [Harry Pinero] Yeah, absolute stunning. - [Filly] Honestly, you've got a lovely face. - [Chloe] Why couldn't you have said that in the first round?

43:24

- You look sweet, and I'm clarting and shit, I'll be honest, as many tings as possible, so there's no point.

43:30

Careful! I wouldn't want to do that to you, you seem like a good girl.

43:35

- At least she's honest. - Bro, why does it keep falling? - I didn't touch it! I didn't fucking touch it!

43:43

- [Chunkz] You reckon she's not into clarting? - She doesn't look like a clarts to me. Looks like a good girl. - Are you into casual sex, basically, he's trying to ask.

43:49

(laughing) - No. - You see that "no"? (shouting)

44:02

- It's mad how you know casual. When you see that "mhh". - Yeah, that means it depends.

44:08

Do what you want to do! Do you, boo-boo! - [Ethan] Ay, Filly won.

44:17

- Hello, my name is Louise, I'm 27 and I'm from London. - Hi Louise. I'm Tobi, 27.

44:24

Just wondering if you have a yard sale anytime soon? 'Cause I've got some junk that hasn't been touched in years.

44:30

- Ooh. - That's the police coming to shut you down. - [Josh] Years?

44:37

Cobwebs! - Hi, I'm Simon. I'm 28. And do you want some really great sex? Yeah?

44:42

- Yeah. - [Simon] Oh, okay. - [Josh] Was that the punchline? - Yeah, that wasn't the punchline, but I'll take it. - [Josh] Was it me? - Nah. - Oh.

44:48

- [Tobi] What? - You did pause, you paused, so... - I mean, I'll take it, I'm here. - Hi, I'm Josh. I'm 28.

44:55

Roses are red. You're as cute as a duck. Let's go on a date and then we can... - [Ethan] Oh.

45:01

- Cuddle. - Yes. - [Harry] Oh god, this is... - I'm Vik, I'm 25.

45:07

My ex girlfriend said I'd never do better than her. Do you want to prove her right? - [Chunkz] Prove her right, not wrong, goodness me, Vik.

45:15

You know, he's an assassin. - Hey, I'm Ethan, I'm 25.

45:20

I'm from London and I wrote you a poem. Hey Louise. You'd look better on your knees. So yes, please.

45:27

(laughing) - Oh, I thought that was gonna work. - [Filly] I can't lie, Ethan is smooth as well, bro.

45:32

- Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23. Are you a pickaxe? 'Cause I want to make you mine. (laughing)

45:38

- [Filly] Nah, that one's hard. (cheering) Do you know how cold he is? "'Cause I want to make you mine".

45:44

(laughing) He's sick! - I'm KSI. (tense music) - That ain't gonna work, that can't work.

45:50

Not two times in a row. - [Filly] 'Course it works. If you don't say yes.

45:56

- I'm KSI. - KSI... Okay, yes. - [Harry Pinero] What the fuck, that works?

46:03

- These two come like twins in pots.

46:09

- From KSI to twins in pots. - Hi, my name's Chunkz. I'm 24. And I can tell just by looking at you,

46:15

your mom's going to love me. - [Simon] Aw. - Yes.

46:21

- [Tobi] He's one away. - When you mention moms and love...

46:26

- Ay, Filly should be a little bit worried right now, look at the size.

46:33

- Hi, my name is <PRESIDIO_ANONYMIZED_PERSON>, I'm 29. By your decisions you made, I deserve better.

46:39

(shouting) - [JJ] Ay, hold on, what're you talking about?

46:45

Wait, what do you mean?

46:50

Rah. - Ay, if he says the line that he says he's gonna use, please don't say what he said.

46:57

- Hi, I'm Filly, I'm 25. I'll be honest. Clapped. (Ethan makes pained noises)

47:06

- [JJ] Jesus fucking Christ. - Ay, you know what, you're a dickhead.

47:13

You're a dickhead. You're a dickhead, man. - [Simon] Why? Oh my God.

47:21

- [Josh] She deserves better, bro. - [JJ] Why? Ay, yo.

47:32

- [Josh] Go and say sorry, bro. - [Simon] Ay, go apologise. - [Ethan] Filly, say sorry, man.

47:41

- I'm sorry. I'm clapped. Not you. - Mhh.

47:47

- [Tobi] Ay, mean it, bro. - I'm really, really sorry.

47:53

- I don't believe you. - Look, I'm really, really sorry. - No.

47:59

(laughing) - [Simon] Good effort. - Start with me, please.

48:04

- Well, at least you apologised, so. - [Filly] Yeah, I didn't mean it. - I respect you apologised, even if you didn't mean it. - Look, first and foremost, I'd never come here

48:11

and do that to you. (laughing) - [Chunkz] Well, you did it. - It wasn't the real me! I'd never, not to you.

48:21

- Okay, what about me? - You took yourself out, didn't you? - Because look at the state of them.

48:26

Joking, bro! - Fight me, bro. - Well, you never gave me a chance, so, yeah.

48:34

- How about our good friend, Ethan? - Yeah, yeah. - No. Yours is too far. It was too far. - What did you say again?

48:40

- Do you know what? I don't even remember. (laughing) It's big, I don't care, man.

48:46

- Yeah. So the rest of you, I think you were too far. That's why, you went too far. - [JJ] Jheez!

48:51

- Hi guys. - [Filly] Black is beautiful! - Hi, I'm Nandi, 25, from London.

48:58

- Hey, I'm Ethan. I'm 25. I'm from London. Let's play carpenter. First, we'll get hammered, then I'll nai- nail you.

49:04

Oh, I flopped it. (shouting) You know what? I ain't eaten.

49:09

- I feel your pain, bro. I really do. - Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23. Did you fall from heaven?

49:15

Because it looks like you landed on your face. Sorry. - No. - [Harry] I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

49:21

- What did you say at the end? - [Harry] I just said sorry, I felt like I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it, I couldn't do it, I couldn't do it. - I'm Tobi, I'm 27.

49:27

And honestly I'm just here to see what Chunkz, Harry and Filly have to say, so... I'm going to wait over there.

49:32

(laughing) I'm watching you. - [Chunkz] That's pressure! That's not allowed. - [Harry Pinero] You're supposed to be cool.

49:38

- You're the feature. Do it. - [Chunkz] That's not right, though. - [Josh] You got good lines, yeah? - [Chunkz] I can't lie, they're not the greatest.

49:45

- Mate, you've gotta deliver. - Hey, my name's Vik. I'm 25. And if I can guess your favourite colour, will you swipe right?

49:52

You know what, don't worry about it. - Ay, that was sauce. That was sauce.

50:01

She woke up and chose violence! Violence.

50:06

- [Tobi] What are you doing? - [Nandi] Wow. - I'm KSI. - [Filly] 'Course, that has to work. - I'll say yes for the dance, so...

50:13

- [Harry Pinero] Everyone knows he's got bread, that's all it is. When you got money... - [Filly] At this point, have you clocked now, as well? - [JJ] Yeah, yeah. I'm actually realising how famous I am.

50:20

(laughing) It's actually mad. Rah. - Ay, yo, go on Miniminter. Try it, try it.

50:27

- I'm Miniminter. (laughing)

50:32

- [JJ] One day, one day. - Oh, wait!

50:39

No? - No. - That was the dance you did. - [JJ] No, it's not bro. - That's what you did!

50:44

- Bro, you ain't me, though. (JJ laughing) - Hi, I'm Josh. I'm 28. I spent 11 grand on Pokémon cards the other night.

50:51

- I don't really care about the money, but I like your beard. - [Josh] Come on! (shouting) All right, come on.

51:02

- This is what Sidemen are paid money for. - Hi, my name is Chunkz, I'm 24. Can we play heads and tails?

51:08

If it goes with heads, swipe right. Goes with tails, you swipe right. - All right, try me. - Yeah?

51:13

It's heads. - Do you know what, you're cute. Go on. - Oh, thank you, babes!

51:19

- I came here for that? - [Harry Pinero] She weren't even listening. - You weren't listening? - [Harry Pinero] She weren't even listening.

51:25

- She was! You heard what I said, right? - Yeah, of course I heard it. (laughing) - Bit of sarcasm.

51:31

- [Simon] Which one was swipe right? - But he's cute, that's why. - [Nandi] He's cute, so... - [Chunkz] I'm cute.

51:36

- [Josh] And you got better hair as well, bro. - Speaking about heads and tails, my name's Harry, I'm 29.

51:42

If you ever gave me head, I'll never "tell". (shouting) - [Harry] I thought that was good!

51:47

- Just move. - Dayum! - [Tobi] She just don't appreciate us. - [Chunkz] No girls fom you. - I'll be honest, that's poor from Harry. You're the only black woman

51:53

that's come on the show, you deserve respect. Lovely to meet, my name's Filly, I'm 25. (Nandi laughing)

51:58

- [JJ] Dayum!

52:05

- You should know better, I'll be honest. - You did it for the camera. The thing is, I picked him up, and what he was saying, you know what...

52:12

I wont't say anything. - I don't know what you said. - I did what he did! I said my name. Nevermind.

52:18

- Right, okay. Second one, too short. - All right. - I'm telling you, those shoes are doing confidence.

52:27

- [Nandi] The what? - [Ethan] The shoes are doing confidence today. - I'm still 5"8 without them, but yes. Third one, that was too much.

52:33

Fourth one... - I put myself here, don't worry. - Oh, mh-mh. (laughs) - She said "mh-mh"!

52:38

(laughing)

52:44

Yeah, you're cheeky. She's cheeky.

52:50

That's unreal. - Yeah. So, second to last. It could have been, but I needed more from you.

52:56

- Okay. Sorry. I'll try and improve. (laughing) - And then the last one, you just mumbled on it.

53:01

It could have been as well. - Said you're shy. Mad, millions of views, and you're shy?

53:07

Next one! - Hey guys, I'm Carmel, and I'm 29.

53:13

I'm from Southeast London. How are you guys doing? - [Tobi] She's the first person to ask about us!

53:18

- Hello, I'm Harry I'm 20... 20... I'm 24, oh God. Do you know what's on the menu? Me, 'n' you.

53:25

- [Harry Pinero] Oh! "Me" "n" "u"! Harry, I'm not gonna lie...

53:31

- [Filly] So good, he is so good. Do you know how good he is? - [Chunkz] He's actually trying to clart today. - Do you know how good he is? Me "n u"? Me-nu?

53:38

- Menu. - That's unreal. - Hi, I'm Simon, I'm 28. And, ay, Tobi, call the police. - What? Okay. Why?

53:44

- Someone stole her ass! (laughing)

53:49

- [Josh] Did you say...? - [Chunkz] That's moist! That's moist!

53:56

- [JJ] What! - [Filly] You don't deserve that. Harry, come here.

54:01

- [Harry Pinero] Talk to me. - I say we run train on her. - Choo choo! - Train? - Sure.

54:07

- [Harry Pinero] Yeah, love that. Love that. Choo-choo!

54:16

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's an emergency. They stole her ass. They stole her ass, right? - [Simon] Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, they stole her ass.

54:23

- [Harry Pinero] Violation! - Oh, they hung up. - [Vik] What's happened? What's happening here?

54:30

- I don't know what that one was. - [Tobi] They hung up! - Hi. I'm really into cryptocurrency.

54:35

- [Carmel] Same. - I've a lot of money in reef and ethereum. I'm also KSI.

54:42

- Let's do it. (shouting) - [Simon] I hate you! I hate you! - I'm too sick.

54:49

- [Filly] What, did he say his name again? - [Harry Pinero] How is he getting away with this, bro? - Fam, he said he's into cryptocurrency and "I'm KSI".

54:54

- That's what I need to do! - And I said KSI, and she said, oh okay calm.

55:02

- Hi, my name is Vik, I'm 25. And I can see that you have a "beret" good sense of fashion.

55:08

- Nice one. Yeah, let's do it. - [Tobi] Why are you being nice?

55:18

- Hi, my name is Ethan, I'm 25. (claps hands) That sounds like my balls slapping on your cooch.

55:24

(shouting) - [Filly] On his what? - [Harry Pinero] You, my friend... - No, he deserves it. He deserves to be here!

55:32

Ay, get in on our train! - Vile. Disgusting! Disgusting. That was disgusting!

55:41

- Hi, I'm Josh. I'm 28. The discount code for this video is "legs". Do you want to spread them?

55:47

(shouting and clapping) - [Harry Pinero] Oh, good one!

55:54

- [Simon] 10 out of 10! - [JJ] Here we go. - Hi, my name's Chunkz and I'm 24.

55:59

I'm actually the richest man in the room, because this is KSI's wallet. - [Tobi] Jheez! (shouting)

56:08

- Let's have a crazy night out. (shouting and cheering)

56:16

- [Chunkz] Yeah! (laughing) (cheering)

56:29

(cheering) - Ay, wait, wait. Let me get that ring back! - [Filly] Let's all get in the train!

56:38

(rap music plays) (rap music plays)

56:43

(rap music plays) (rap music plays)

56:49

(rap music plays) (rap music plays)

Transcript

0:00

- Hello and welcome to Sidemen, $20,000 hotel versus $200 hotel,

0:05

Europe edition. As always, the rules are simple. The boys are split into two teams of three at random.

0:11

One team will go to a $20,000 luxurious hotel, and the other team will be out there in a $200 hotel,

0:18

not in the greatest of times. And for this video, the boys are meeting at different airports, so they already know their teams.

0:24

So let's go find out the teams and meet the boys. - Hi, it's 5:00 AM as you can tell. [phone alarm goes off] [chuckles]

0:30

- Oh. - Oh dear. He's having a nap. We know that we are flying somewhere. And that's all we know.

0:36

- God, why this early though? - I know. - Whyyy? - The others got extra two hours sleep. - But we do know they're at Luton.

0:42

- That's all we know. - And we're at terminal five, which is normally a better side. - Is it? - I think it, I think so. - No one's been to Luton that hasn't gone to a private jet.

0:48

- Yes. This is the only issue. - How you feeling this fine morning? - I'm all right.

0:53

I'm way less tired than I should be, but yeah, I'm good. I'm good. How are you feeling?

0:59

- I'm actually alive. I'm really good. I went to bed at sorta two. - Tell me where we're going. [apprehensive piano music]

1:06

[aeroplane engine roaring] [apprehensive music intensifies] - We'll get the best, bud.

1:12

- We're not getting the best. - We're getting the best. - We're not getting the best. - We're getting the best, bud. - We're not getting the best. - Look at the crew, wait, give me the camera.

1:18

These are the main crew, this is the main crew here. - Oh, [indistinct]. - So that's your reason, right?

1:24

- Yeah, yeah. - Okay, well, he sent us this early because we're the bad team and there's so many different things to do. That's what it is.

1:29

- No, no, no, no, no. - Yeah. - My guy, Tobi. - . - Ready for a little budget holiday?

1:34

- Budget holiday? - I just got that feeling. JJ, I knew you had too many nice experiences.

1:40

You can't keep it up. You and JJ had so many nights- - Listen, wherever I go, I always have a good time with the boys.

1:46

- This is true, we're gonna have a good time. - I always have a good time. You got Air Forces. - Yes, I know. I got a yellow. - Security! - I got a yellow.

1:51

- If you don't tell anyone, we won't. - Oh, okay. - Put that down. [laughter] - It hit me.

1:58

[laughter] - Who wants to do the honours? - You know what?

2:04

- He's taking the responsibility. - Man knocked on his head, you know. [laughter]

2:10

- Hope you didn't stress about bringing a fleece [laughter] because you are flying all the way to Greece.

2:15

- f*ck, what are the chances of that? That is nuts, I literally said the other day I wanted to go to Greece. - Is it business class, at least?

2:21

- No, no. - No, no. It's not. - Four o'clock wake up. - We're not even in group one, lads.

2:27

- Thanks. - We're in group two. - I've never been group two in my life. - Why aren't I sat with you? - 13D, 13E, 29E. - 29E.

2:33

[laughter] - Well, I'll see you boys on the other side. - And you think this is a good trip? You think this is the good trip?

2:39

[laughter] This has 16 rows back. - It's a four hour flight, boys. And where have you got, ah f*ck. - I hope you make it.

2:45

- Well, nice one. - I know it's early and you're feeling mellow, but cheer yourselves up

2:51

as you're going somewhere blue and yellow. - Blue and yellow. - Sweden. - Sweden? - Sweden, yeah?

2:56

- There's no bad place in Sweden. - Come on. - Sweden? - Oh, we're going to Sweden?

3:01

- Come on. - Stockholm. - Oh my God. - I can't lie. Stockholm, Stockholm's an expensive place.

3:07

- Yes. - We getting served. Wagamama's my friend. I'm telling you, the day just gets better and better. - Oh yes.

3:12

- Yes. - I'm not joining them. I'm having a power juice. - Thank you. That's a healthy king right there.

3:18

I was saying I just feel happier now. I feel safe and warm. - I feel happier. - I feel like the day can't go wrong.

3:24

- Feel happier. I've just wanked off my [indistinct]. You can get a real, like-

3:29

- No, don't do that. - Don't do that. - There's kids up here. - Come on, man. [whimsical whistling music] - Oh.

3:35

- All right, cheers. - Cheers. - To the good team, boys. - Cheers to a f*cking awful- - Cheers to the bad team.

3:41

- A good team. - For a terrible time. - I believe. I believe with all my heart. Don't worry about it anymore.

3:46

- You're delusional. - Don't worry about it. - Delusional. - I'm telling you, when I got my feet up in the spa later,

3:52

with the sea rolling at my feet. - How are you in the spa and in the sea? - I dunno, I'll find a way. [laughter]

3:58

Them Athenians man, they know their stuff. - Although it's probably gonna be a little chilly. I don't know. Maybe. I don't know.

4:03

We'll have to find out. - Ah, don't cross me, ah. - Okay. Do we know where the others are? - Not a clue.

4:09

I guess we'll find out eventually. - Ready and we'll do a little transition onto like an aeroplane or something. I'm gonna punch into you. Do the little aeroplane.

4:15

Three, two, one. [aeroplane engine noises] [laughter] - Jesus. [bouncy electronic music]

4:25

- Look at this. This leg room right here. Is this a false sense of security?

4:31

I think we're getting pranked. - So much space, oh my god. - We're living good out here.

4:37

[bouncy electronic music continues]

4:47

- Well, my friend, I've been so lonely on the flight. - They're out there, mate. I think everyone was pretty lonely.

4:53

There was a lot of sleeping doing. [Harry sighs] - Me and the boys - We're here. - Just touched down in Sweden. - Call us there for Swedemen. Swedemen Sunday.

5:00

- Swedemen Sunday. What's in your hand? A fridge bag. - He's got his lunch, he's got his lunchbox.

5:05

- So, I actually do have my food in here. - Who packed your lunch for you? - So, my chef. - Aw.

5:11

- So imagine we have an incredible restaurant booked for us this evening. You're gonna bring your lunchbox. - Genuinely, are you on a strict diet?

5:17

- I actually am, yeah. - So if we go to food today, - I'm gonna have to - You know what? - go to the chef and go, can you warm this up?

5:23

- You're chatting sh*t. You're chatting sh*t. - in the oven for me. - I dunno how serious you're being right now. - I'm being-

5:29

- He's being serious. I kind of, right here. And to be fair, if we're on the bad team, JJ's gonna eat better than us this whole trip.

5:35

- True, true. - You know, this is like, weather news is on here. You'd take responsibility. - About, I'm telling you, this is nothing.

5:41

- It's gonna say, by the power of Zeus, you're about to sip that good juice. - Ooh. - That doesn't tell us anything.

5:47

- Before we get you started with all your fun, we need to find a taxi to your destination.

5:52

Doesn't rhyme. - Yeah it does, to your fun, - Taxi to your destination. - Taxi to your destination. - I'm not taking that, Josh. I'm not taking that.

5:59

Look out for a driver with your name on the board. We learned nothing. - We got nothing. - We got nothing. - What was the point of that?

6:05

[keyboard typing noises] [aeroplane engine roaring] - We're in Sweden, we made it. Wow, I feel so Swedish.

6:11

- How positive do you feel right now? - I feel very positive. - But you are always optimistic.

6:17

- Well, because I'm never on the bad team. - Which is one of the reasons I like being on your team. - We're going now, we're going to ruins. We're going to the ruins.

6:22

We're gonna go to ruins and there's gonna be- - Jesus's birthplace. - There's gonna be a tent. There's gonna be a tent. - That's the only thing I think that could be.

6:28

It's either a beautiful hotel, or he's put us in like- - We're in the ruins in a tent, yeah.

6:33

- Yeah, like camping in the ruins. - Yes, yeah, yeah. - We're camping in the ruins and we are gonna cook like a poached human in there.

6:39

- A rabbit. We're gonna have to fend for our food, right? - Yeah, yeah. - He said a human. - We're f*cked, is what we're getting at. - Right, I don't want this one.

6:45

- Yeah, I'll do it, I'll do it, yeah. - He's feeling optimistic. - You do number two, huh? - You bad boy. I'm feeling it.

6:54

You're not going to get far without the use of a nice car.

6:59

- Ah, well, we found that. - Ooh. - Okay, well we found the driver, so. - Okay, I guess we get in and see what happens.

7:04

- Okay. - See what happens. - How nice is the car? Where's the car? - Yeah, let's see. - Let's follow the man. - Mr. Driver? How nice is your car?

7:10

- I dunno if this is legal. - My pants are quite long, all right? - All right. Stand further away. - You saw nothing. You saw nothing. You saw nothing.

7:16

- You're seeing nothing. You're seeing absolutely nothing. - Why do you not just come in shorts? - Because I didn't know where we were going.

7:22

- Don't tell me that you bought those in Vegas, by the way. [laughter] - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - You bought these in Vegas?

7:27

- Bro, yes. What? I explore, I adventure. My shoes get dirty. What can I say?

7:32

- That is- - What can I say? - I explore, I adventure. - Oh. This one? - Oh?

7:38

- Oh yeah. - Oh yeah. - Oh yeah. - Oh yeah.

7:43

Okay. - Wow. - Me Gusta. Okay, alright. Mm. Feel a little bit rich. - No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

7:49

I've jumped. Once upon a time I jumped in a Rolls Royce and I was very excited and then everything fell apart.

7:55

- I can't lose. I can't lose. - [Voice Off Camera] You are the weakest link, goodbye. - I'm donning a suit in a boot, man. - He's got a suit on, this is positive.

8:00

- Yeah, this man looks serious. - He's got a suit. - This ain't no Pablo suit. - He's got, yeah. - It's a good sign. - Yeah, okay.

8:07

- We're cooking. [thunder sound effect] - [Voice Off Camera] Oh. - But that's how we're gonna try and create fire later tonight.

8:12

- Wow, you can really dance. [laughter]

8:18

- Oh, no. - His face. [everyone laughing]

8:25

- Wait. Yo, he can't believe it. He's like-

8:31

[everyone laughing] - He doesn't know if he saw you or not. So he is really questioning whether that was KSI

8:38

that got in the car. - What do you think? [laughs] - Yeah. Yeah. And he's got a picture of you on his phone, I reckon.

8:44

And he's like, he's checking, but he's checking. [laughter`] Look, he's Googling. - It says five foot, eleven.

8:50

[all laughing] - . - Is the waggon gonna be good or not? I think that's a good indicator, right?

8:56

- It's not. - It is. - It's gotta fit all of us in it. It's just gonna be a van. - That way. - Yeah, that way.

9:01

- Yeah. Put me in a big- - Oh, look at that big boy. - Put me in a [indistinct]. - I won't lie, it's almost too hot. - No, I like it, man.

9:07

- Do you? It's too much, man. I'm gonna wilt away in like 10 minutes. Especially when we're in the cave. - I wish I was here for a week now.

9:13

Zachary, extend the trip. - Well, let's see where we're staying. - Zachary, extend the trip. - Oh, what it is?

9:18

- Okay. - That's your schedule in there. Yoink. - What are you trying to do, bro?

9:24

What are you trying to do? You got another envelope for us? - James has got nowhere he can go. We just bash him up and take the schedule.

9:31

- I mean, he won't be able to do anything. - Or why don't we bash him up and then just pay, bro? We're rich, we got money.

9:37

[Tobi laughs] - That's Harry's energy. - Why am I still getting bashed up?

9:43

[laughter] Oh, fine. I'll get bashed up for content. - Yeah!

9:48

- Good friend. Kon wouldn't do that for us. - I usually pay a dominatrix for it anyway. - Woahh.

9:53

- You know what, mate? I don't think he pays. I think it just happens. [Tobi giggles] - Got dominatrix on tap. - Every guy likes to get manhandled a bit now and then.

10:00

- That's why you fought Logan Paul, isn't it? - Okay. [Sidemen laugh] d*ckhead.

10:06

- Yes, please. - Yeah, I'll take a water. A carton of water, my days, they don't play around in these ends.

10:11

- [Voice Off Camera] Oh, it's about that? Yeah. Slug juice. - Oh, it's hot in here when he closes the door. - It's very hot. - I don't know about you but it sounds

10:17

- Nap time? - like it's time for a little meal. - Oh, a little meal. Oh, what's he got in the box? - The question is, will he share?

10:24

- God, f*ck off. - Sick. Is that a hotel that's a jumbo jet? That's quite cool. Look at that.

10:30

I hope we're not, imagine if we're staying there. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. - No!

10:37

- Wait, what's going on? - Don't you dare, don't you dare. - Oh, f*ck off. - Oh my God. No. - We're staying in the plane. We're staying on the plane.

10:42

- No! - From what I've seen outside, it looks a bit of a sh*t hole. - Bug.

10:48

- Still think we're going to the good place? - No, we're the bad team. [loud sigh] - It's nice, but it's all a bit falling apart.

10:56

- Bug. - We could be in trouble here. - Bug, we're in big trouble. - I think you just have to accept it. - Nah, no, no.

11:01

- I'm opening the next envelope. - Nah. Yeah, it's gonna say you're on the good team. - You think I open an envelope and it's says good things on it?

11:07

- What's it when like the Lord comes to you? - Epiphany. - An epiphany. - And he said "you're staying in a five star,

11:13

maybe even a six star hotel today." I said, "Lord, thank you. Means a lot." - What?

11:18

- But, why? - Why? - Why? - No. - No! - Where's there to stay? There's nowhere to stay.

11:25

- No! f*ck off! - Wait, what? I wasn't even ready.

11:31

- He sent us on a plane to a plane. - I wasn't happy with the size of the plane you flew in,

11:36

so I got you a bigger one. Just for fun. It doesn't even rhyme! ♪ Give me oil in my lamp, I pray. ♪

11:43

♪ Give me oil ♪ - Out here. [laughter] We're not even going to Jerusalem. We're actually, there's nothing to do with Jesus here.

11:49

[Simon laughs] - I'm gonna be walking around later today in Jesus sandals in a dusty pit. - Yeah, yeah. - In some Reubens, and I'm gonna feel like Jesus.

11:55

- Right, well, we're bad team. Smash it, smash it. - Let's go, let's go. - Let's get it. We're not going to be able to afford,

12:00

a hundred dollars won't get us anything in this country. It's too expensive. That's like a thousand kroner. We'll get like, a meal. Maybe.

12:07

- Yeah, maybe. - At least you got packed lunch. - Yeah, yeah, man. - Oh, is that your packed lunch? Popcorn? - What? It's a snack.

12:14

- Right, let's go check out our- - Wow. Fun. - Hotel. - Check out. Or check in? - Hey.

12:19

- Hey. - There better be f*cking WiFi. - Harry said he knows where we're going. - I feel like I've seen the hotel we're going to

12:24

before online. - He said he can't tell us - In my previous travels. - but he can draw it. So all we have right now is Snapchat.

12:30

He is drawing the hotel. - This is like hills, hills here. That's the hotel, and then scene.

12:39

- What the f*ck is that? - It's a bad, right, it's a bad drawing of it. - Do some colouring so people know the difference.

12:45

- Okay, okay, okay. - I've got you on greens now. - All right, green. So this is all green. - Never a dull day. - This is us.

12:51

This is us. - Harry would love this. Harry would just sit and watch while the planes coming. - Whilst watching plane crash documentaries.

12:58

- Yeah. [laughs] - Oh my God. Wait, is there an elevator? - There is, but I'll take the stairs, to be honest. - Push the button until the door opens.

13:05

- Hey, guess what? Do you know what's the good news? There's a free shuttle to the airport from here.

13:11

So when we want to leave, at least we're close. - Well, we can walk five minutes and we'll be there. [Vik laughs]

13:16

Literally. - The hotel lift doesn't work. Have you ever seen that? - Yes. [laughs] - He's angry that the lift doesn't work.

13:22

- So what are those lines? - Where? Oh, that's like, the balconies. - Okay. [laughs] - Well I'm talking like, see, all the way back here as well,

13:29

I went out. - Oh. - We're out. Like a f*cking - We're out. - evil villain's lair. Do I know where we're going

13:34

or have I made that up on the spot? - You really are. You really are an inspiration. - You definitely made that up on the spot. Look at it.

13:40

- You're underestimating a man who's thought of travelling to Greece many times before, like. - Steve's just helping me out with the bag.

13:46

I've got my own bag. It's not like I'm not carrying anything, so stop judging me.

13:51

Oh, wow. It doesn't even work. This is where we're staying then, huh? Just sleeping on the floor. Like d*ckheads.

13:57

- I'm gonna guess the code. - Did you just put in 1, 2, 3? - Yeah. - Wait, no footwear beyond this point. - Wait, what? What do you mean?

14:04

- Oh, just, I already hate this hotel. I already hate it. - Anybody home?

14:10

- Whatever, you just break the door. - Oh wow. - Oh wow, that's lovely. - That's different, isn't it? Oh, look at that pigeon. That's a different kind of pigeon.

14:17

- That's the luxury pigeons, man. That's not a Thames Water pigeon, that is. [Ethan laughs]

14:23

- That pigeon seems a good liar. - Seeing hills. - Seeing gated communities. - Yeah. I'm seeing some nice, I'm- - It's like Beverly Hills.

14:29

- We're not driving to the slums here. We're driving to the, - Unless we're driving through it. - Seeing a tennis court.

14:34

- Yeah. - I'm seeing the sea. That's the sea. - You see the sea? Oh, that is the sea. - The sea is here.

14:39

- There's a hill. - The sea is here. I think Buggy's drawing might be coming to life here.

14:44

- Is that the building? - See it up there. It's like, there's lights. - You're cappin'. You're cappin'. - No, look, look, look!

14:49

- Don't give him the satisfaction. He made it up. - Look. - He made it up, bro, it's a square. - Simon, wait till you see it.

14:55

Because that's a square up on the hill. - I mean, it's fine. And look, we're in a really nice area. If we get bored, we can just walk over, look at some cars.

15:01

- Oh. - Oh, hello. This is actually, that's quite cool.

15:07

I've definitely, definitely had worse experiences. It's quite novel. - This or easy hotel?

15:12

- Oh, this every time. - There you go. Moving up in the world. - No, this is all right. Do you know what? Do you know what I'm really enjoying?

15:18

These tables and chairs are so low, I feel quite tall. - Oh, sh*t.

15:23

- I feel like a big person. [Tobi and Vik chuckle] - You must feel six foot. - We're now at the mining part.

15:30

- Oh, this looks a bit more, well- - Oh no. - Bridging it.

15:35

- Are we working in the sea today? Working with those miners. - I don't know, it's pretty beautiful, man.

15:41

I don't think this could go wrong now. I don't think it, - I hate being on your team. I hate being on your team.

15:47

- Surely not, right? - That's what f*cked it, there. That's it then. - Okay. - That's all right. - .

15:52

- No, no, no, no. We're just, there's a big sign that says Four Seasons. [Harry giggles] Caps, caps, caps, caps. It can't be.

15:58

- He's turning around, he just said, I mean, he's sending right past. It's not here. - I don't know. Seems a bit fishy.

16:03

We're pulling into the Four Seasons. - It's true, he would've just turned around there. That's us. That's us in 20 minutes. - Give me it. Give me the envelope.

16:11

Give me the f*cking envelope. - I guess we should play a little game to decide who picks the rooms.

16:16

- Okay, I've got an idea for a game. We're gonna guess the year this hotel was built

16:22

and whoever guesses the closest gets first pick, whoever second closest gets second pick, whoever is third place gets third pick.

16:29

- 1976. - Okay, well that's not a fun game anymore. - That's not the year the hotel was built. 2009. I think I won.

16:37

- You did, 2009. I'll take second. [laughter] - Wait. No, that isn't-

16:42

- Yeah. - You guessed 1978. - You misread the sign. That's when this plane started flying.

16:48

It's not when the hotel was made. - Can I just say, - Oh, oh. - Can I just say, by the way?

16:53

- No, no, no, no, no. [Harry squeals] - Well, you chose a white building. [Harry squeals] - It's pretty accurate.

17:00

- We might not be here. Do not speak on this until we have- - You can stay if you want. - Oh, I'd love to stay. I'd love to.

17:06

- Yeah, no, we'd really, I would bite your hand off to stay here. - Welcome, welcome to Four Seasons.

17:12

[all cheer] [upbeat electronic music]

17:18

- No, wait, I wanna see the envelope. - Bro, wait! I want the envelope. - Wait for the envelope. - I want the envelope - 2009. - Alright. Tobi gets first pick. I get second.

17:23

JJ jumped the gun and- [Tobi laughs] - Nah, this is bullsh*t. - Eat your popcorn. [laughs]

17:30

- So I'm guessing the boys are living it up. - That's why I'm, yeah, that's always the problem in these situations.

17:37

But I just know somewhere in a different country, there's laughter, there's screams of excitement.

17:43

- But you know what, yeah? As nice as all of that is, it's always more boring. - They doubted us. They doubted us.

17:49

They doubted us. They doubted us. - He comes in here too. - They doubted us. They doubted us. Oh, it's looking gorgeous. - Oh, it's looking lovely.

17:55

- Oh, it's looking gorgeous. Looking lovely. Looking lovely. - They said, "what's gonna happen to Ethan if he gets on a bad team?" I guess we'll never know.

18:00

- Everything is ready. Your suite is ready. The room is ready. - I think she's in on it. I don't know exactly but she still, - No, no, no, no.

18:07

No, it's cappuccino. It's cappuccino. - Welcome to Four Seasons. Enjoy your stay with us. - Thank you very much. - Thank you. Someone's ordered a cappuccino, bro.

18:13

- If my cheeks touch the toilet. - Someone's ordered a cappuccino. - No, no, no, no, no. - She said suite, suite. - Yeah, bro, if we're gonna be staying in like,

18:19

the suite, - The penthouse suite. - Of course we are, man. It's Josh Zerkaa, man, he don't play. He don't come to play.

18:24

And you know what we're gonna do? We're gonna look out from the top balcony. It's gonna be a nice little bay in front of us. And look behind us, the mountains.

18:29

Like I said, like I said! [laughter] - Jack is there, is he gonna be down there? - I hope he's gone with the bad team. - In the club tonight, David's gonna be like,

18:35

"Hey, we're on my private jet tomorrow." [Tobi chuckles] - My God. - You trying to come through, catch the late night flight.

18:41

- Trying to join the mile high club. - Brings him back here, they're like, "absolutely not."

18:47

- Here's my Sweden experience, Vernon. - Oh, dear. Is this one downstairs? We'll save this one 'til last. That's gonna be-

18:53

- Is this the best one? - I reckon it is. JJ, you got last pick. Unlucky, mate. [giggles]

18:59

Wait, this is big, you know? It's, it's actually kind of crazy. - I feel short again, by the way.

19:04

- Yeah. There's a lot of room. - Oh. - Oh my God.

19:12

I told you man, he's not leaving the bad team off at 5:00 AM am. - He might. - Nah. - Sadistic, man.

19:18

Oh, my God. [calm electronic music]

19:28

- My god! - Hello! Hi, my friend. Hello, my friend. Hello! Oh, my word.

19:35

Thank you. Oh! - Would you guys like a piña colada? - Yes, please! - Yes, I'd love a piña colada.

19:41

- Thank you very much. - Lads, are you seeing what I'm seeing? - What? - What? - Mini games. - Mini games?

19:47

- Yes. Thank you. - We know you would like to have fun, so. - Oh, we do have fun. - Oh, nice. - Wait. This plane is huge.

19:54

- Oh! - Is this you? - This is me, bro. Come. [door squeaks]

19:59

Ugh! - You're at the head of the plane. - Yo. - Up in the clouds. - Bro, there's a beanbag in the corner.

20:04

This is pretty sweet. - You've nice, this is the best room in the plane. Look. Cause it's the front.

20:10

These planes used to be nice. - Bro, there's a en suite. - Say what? - Look, a en suite.

20:16

Look, a shower. Look, a toilet. - That's good. - This is decent. - Okay. - I can't com-plane. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done.

20:23

- Hang on a minute. Simon. Bring the phone, lad. - The whole way. - Bring the phone, bring the phone, bring the phone. Tell me. I haven't done a bang job.

20:30

- This hotel. Would you recognise it if I showed you this? [Ethan laughs] - Mi casa, I like it.

20:35

[Everyone laughs] - You know what? It's not an awful effort. - It's actually not that bad.

20:41

- Also, I banged it with the en suite. - Oh, no. - 'Cause I'm seeing. - oh, no, no, no, no, no. Not again.

20:48

- Someone's in there. No, that is. Yeah. Oh my. Okay. All right.

20:53

Communal, - Communal... - toilets. - Where's JJ? - Don't know, probably being sad.

20:58

- You know my room's crazy when my luggage takes up most of the room

21:03

because this, this is it. This is my room.

21:09

Got my food, my meal prep. No microwave. No microwave. So imma have to figure that out.

21:15

- Whoa, oh! [Ethan laugh in shock] - Oh, you are kidding me.

21:21

- Agh! Yes! - Oh, you are kidding. - Yes!

21:26

- We did it. - Yes! - We making it. We made it. We made it. We are making it. We made it. We completed it.

21:31

- Agh! - Look at the pool! - Yes! - Now Fortnite dance, bro.

21:37

- No, no, please. - Now Fortnite dance. [bouncy electronic music] - I'm not seeing enough movement.

21:43

- There's jet skis. - Ooh. Yes. Yes. Yes.

21:50

- No Ethan, this isn't a dream. For once you've managed to make it onto the good team. [all cheer]

21:55

Yeah! - What's that? Under?

22:00

Wait, wait, wait, wait. Am I not even in the plane? - Oh, bro. You're in the engine room. - You're in the engine room.

22:06

- What? - JJ717.

22:11

- Are you having a, are you having me on? Josh! - I want that yacht. Tell Josh to get me that.

22:21

Get me that yacht. - Hey, that water looks so inviting. That looks so, - So you're telling me that we've got three floors of this?

22:27

- Mmhmm. - . I've drunk mine away. - I want another one. - . - Oh my God. There's a barbecue and everything.

22:32

What the f*ck? - Ha ha ha! And then my autistic act- I can watch the cranes.

22:39

[laughter] Stuff that I enjoy more, man. - Oh wow. - I've just got a grabber on it. - He's got a grabber.

22:45

- Look, he's got, look at the grabber's got. Once it's moving around right now. - Come all the way here. I'm staying in the nicest hotel.

22:50

- It's really sensory green. - Seeing a grabber. - He's got a grabber. - Oh, amazing.

22:55

[knocking] - Hello. Open up. Whoa.

23:02

Wow. Wow. [Vik snickers]

23:08

- It's great, right? - You got a TV, to be fair. - Yeah. Living it up, bro.

23:14

My luggage takes up most of the room. - This is what happens when you buy Luna.

23:21

- Stay humble. - This is where you end up. - Stay humble. - I know, I should get Toquan in here. [Vik and Tobi laugh]

23:27

Come sleep with me, bro. Well, I mean, what do you mean? That's not sus. Don't sus that, bro.

23:33

There's nothing sus about it. He's made me poor. - You've had a few stinkers in a row though. - I have and I just, I just feel like this is just a good one to win.

23:39

- Yeah. - But I feel I wouldn't want to lose this one. - Yeah. - I can't believe what I'm seeing with my eyes. - Yeah. - But I'm in shock.

23:45

- I really wanna know where they're staying there. - And the cheeky driver. "Oh yeah, I need to turn around." [Simon laughs]

23:50

Yeah. Yeah. Hahaha. - To the Sidemen making a number one artist. Have a stinky time. - Yeah.

23:56

- Yes, come on. Lovely. [coughs] Alright, let's look at this guy.

24:02

- Oh, wait, we need to see Vik's room over there. - I hope it's not as bad as this. - I don't think it- - It can't be. It can't be, right?

24:08

- It can't be, bro. - It can't be. Bro. Hey, yo, I've been, I'm being put in the baggage. I'm in the baggage claim.

24:15

[Tobi laughs] What are they trying to say about me? Why are they putting me in the baggage claim? - You're getting put in the hold.

24:22

- I'm in the hold. - This ain't it, man. Ah, yeah. For all my clothes.

24:28

Do you how many clothes I brought? - [Voice Off Camera] Why'd you bring so many clothes? - Well, because I didn't know where I was gonna be. I wanted to make sure I was prepared for all situations.

24:35

And now I look like a d*ckhead. I thought I was gonna be living it up, but instead I'm in a f*cking wing of a plane.

24:42

- We got henny. - We got the henny! - We got the henny. - Where's the [indistinct]? Jeez.

24:48

- Okay. Little espresso shot. - Do you like these? - No. - Good. - I'm more of a cashew.

24:54

- Same. We'll share those. - You know what they said about Usain Bolt?

24:59

- What do they say? - That he can cashew. - Can we get him on the bad team? Oh, bro. It goes round.

25:04

First room is, oh, it's a nice bedroom. - Oh, this is nice. - Oh, lads. Oh, it's got a big balcony.

25:11

- Got a walk-in wardrobe! - Oh, this is, this is it. - Look at this. Bro. Wait, so you can shower here?

25:18

- You can sit in the shower. - And just look out. You can shower like this. - Hey, you like this room here, lads? - Yeah.

25:24

- You like this room? Dear Mr. Lewis. Come on. - No, what? - Come on. - What the f*ck? - They knew I was coming, man.

25:30

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - We'll see the other, - What's that way? - That way. - Oh, there's nothing that way.

25:35

- Downstairs. - Oh, you are downstairs. You are. - Sorry to hear that, boys. Sorry to hear that.

25:41

Down in the slums. - If the majority vote for a game. - Yeah. The game will decide, Mr. Lewis.

25:46

- Well, it could be better down here. - Well, it could be. And then there won't be a game. - Oh my God.

25:52

- Oh my god, it's a gym! It's gym. - There's a gym. There's a bloody gym. - There's a f*cking gym in here.

25:58

- There's a spa. There's a sauna and a steam room. A sauna! [Harry shrieks]

26:06

This is so good. - Oh, yes. - Oh no. [Tobi giggles] - Is it worse?

26:13

- It might be. It might be. - It can't be, what?

26:20

- What what did I do? This is worse. I don't have a window. Oh, there's a window in my toilet.

26:28

- You got a toilet. - JJ has a toilet, right? - Put your windows into the engine. [Vik and Tobi laugh]

26:37

- This is Behzinga's room. Come on. - Oh, you got a little streaming cell. - Hello, Mr. Payne. Welcome to your gal.

26:44

I'm just joking. - No, this is lovely though, man. - Yeah, no, this desk is nice, man. This is nice. - I'm not doing admin [indistinct] here though.

26:49

- You're making money moves, man. - Aha! - They put you in 'cause they knew that you're about take to over companies or some sh*t.

26:55

I dunno what you do. - That's the last one. - Oh, damn! - Jeez. Oh my God.

27:00

- Oh, hang on a minute. Hang on a minute, I've been hoodwinked. I thought I had the best room, but I definitely don't.

27:07

- Oh, oh, oh boys. - Oh my God.

27:12

- Oh, this is- - Oh my God. - Did you just feel, did you try to open that? - Oh my. Look at this. Who wants to shower later?

27:20

- Bro. This is ridiculous. - Anyone wanna shower? Ethan, we'll shower later. - Ridiculous. - Yeah, I'll shower. - This is ridiculous.

27:25

- Yeah, that's hot. - Yeah? - That's hot. Oh, look at that. - Ah, it's moving on its own! Oh.

27:33

- Imagine having a bath, cock out, bath suds, looking at that. - Taking the piss.

27:39

They're taking the piss. - It's your turn to go. You're bringing that back to your private gym.

27:45

Did you bring it to a replace this? - To the baggage hold. [Tobi laughs] - Oh my. Where's JJ?

27:51

- Yo, I'm coming. - Wait, wait. Do you think you got it better or worse? - Oh, I thought, I definitely go.

27:58

Oh my God. - This is depression. - Oh my God. - I don't have natural light. I don't have a window.

28:03

- You have a toilet. - Do you not have a toilet? - I don't have a toilet. - Oh, you have to use the communal ones upstairs. - Yeah.

28:09

- Look at his window, please. - Oh, that's, yeah yeah. All right, maybe you actually have it worse. sh*t.

28:16

All right, let's go. - Let's go! So you're both wealthy men. And I have a mortgage to pay.

28:22

How much for the room? [laughs] - Oh wait, what's your room saying? - Oh, his room's nice.

28:27

He's got like the front of the plane cabin. Little like beanbag curtains. Double bed.

28:33

He's living. He's actually living. - Oh, he's wakeboarding. Oh my God. It's gonna be me. It's gonna be me.

28:40

I know already. - Well, we've made an executive decision for fairness. - Yeah. - We're all sleeping in this room tonight.

28:45

- Oh, I'd be down for that. I'll be down for that. - Two in here, one in there. - Realistically, we do have to battle for it though. Cause this room's elite.

28:51

And then the one upstairs is pretty elite as well, and then someone has go- ah, you sleeping in the study. - We need a game for it.

28:56

- All of a sudden, I feel a bit better. - Yeah. - Are you swapped with me as well?

29:02

[Vik laughs] Vik, you all right? - Yeah. It's just hay fever.

29:09

- All right, to decide who gets the good bedroom, we're gonna throw this into a bucket down there. - So he's actually, he's not the,

29:14

who doesn't get the worst bedroom. - Yeah. - Yeah. There's two really good ones. And then there's, the office. - All the rules is I can't, like,

29:21

I can do whatever I want. - I think you can do whatever you want. - Want to shoot, shoot. - If it goes in, you get it. Oh.

29:27

Oh. - . - .

29:33

- Oh! - A rotter. - It's easy to overshoot it, man.

29:38

- It's tough. Simon's the type of guy to do this [indistinct]. - He will do it, he will. - Simon's gonna do it. - Yeah, he's an accurate donny.

29:44

[SideMen exclaim] - No, that was it. Still way off.

29:50

[SideMen exclaim] I want you guys know that even if I get the worst one, I'm still happy.

29:56

- Oh, of course, man. Of course. - Oh, okay. Lebron James. - Oh, no. - That was a ways to go.

30:01

- I'm not doing it again. - Ways to go. [high-pitched electronic music]

30:07

- Oh my God! Rimmed it! - Oh my God! - It's not possible.

30:12

- All right, so we're taking JJ to see my room. - I can already feel like these rooms are so much better. - Let you in here. You just, you take that.

30:18

- 749, is that you? - That is me. Be my guest. - Oh my God. Ah.

30:25

Wow. Yep. Yep. Oh, and you've got, you've got your own toilet.

30:32

Fantastic. Wow. Wow. Your toilet is bigger than my f*cking room

30:39

all together. [energetic jazz music] Wow. - This is the one. This is the one.

30:45

- I got it, I can't rim it twice. [loud electronic music blast] Wait, hang on.

30:50

- Wait, wait. - I think by the letter of law, I can't have it. - Can't have it. - But you know what? - I don't know.

30:56

- The [indistinct]. - You know what it is? There's ice in it. I didn't take the ice out. - Did it just bounce off the ice? - I'm not gonna claim that. - Jordan shots.

31:02

- Jordan falls or Jordan swish. - It's a little drop, you say.

31:08

[heavy electronic music] [SideMen celebrate] I got the shot.

31:16

- I can't believe I've got, a little dropper. - Premier League throwing. - But if you get this now, it means I'm guaranteed shot.

31:21

- It means we have to play for first. - Yeah. - Agh! okay.

31:26

- Yes! - Simon, beat Harry for second place. - Come on. - I don't want that bed! - You already know which one I'm taking.

31:33

- f*ck off, man. - I mean, I'll just get this now. - Ooh. - It's swerving.

31:39

- Wee-oo-wee-oo-wee. f*ck off! - Oh my God. Oh my God. - f*ck off.

31:45

- On the hole. - Yes! - You got it! - Yes! - He's done it. - I'm still happy. I don't mind, I don't mind.

31:52

I don't mind. I don't mind. - I actually do feel bad cause it's, - That sat on my [indistinct] more than yours. [Simon laughs]

31:58

- Nothing can ruin my spirits here, boys. [bouncy electronic music] - f*ck you.

32:03

- So how much, - How much? How much? - I'm a hustler, bro. I'm trying to, I'm get this fee. - All right, how much, how much, how much? - I'm asking you how much.

32:09

- 500 quid. - I'm one of the sidemen. - All right, you're right. - How much is a chiropractor these days, James?

32:14

- I think 2 bags. - At least 2? - Three grand. - You are not gonna pick. [laughs]

32:20

I'm your friend. I couldn't do that to you. I'll keep the room. - What? What do you mean he keeps?

32:27

So wait, I get this room? - Nope.

32:32

- Number four, lads. - Nothing can dampen my mood now. And if I'm [indistinct], man. - Hopefully outside is pretty hot.

32:38

- Yeah. - But for you first activity, I'd like you to make a little pot. - Are we doing some pottery?

32:44

- We're doing pottery. - I'm doing pottery. I like pottery, man. - I don't mind pottery. - Pottery is fun. Pottery is fun. - We have come to Athens.

32:50

- Let's be all excited. - We are in Athens. - It's spoiling hot and we're gonna be making... - Pottery. - Pots.

32:56

- Pottery. - So where's the toilet I have to, is it this? I have to use. Oh my God.

33:02

I have to share toilets. - Where's the shower head? - I brought a shower head, bro.

33:08

- Nah, man. I'm just not the shower, bro. I'm not stink. I don't care, man. - That's the same toilet I have there. - I ain't sharing showers. Troll.

33:16

Aight? I worked hard for this. Okay. I moved out the slums.

33:24

I moved out. I worked hard for this. This ain't my life sharing things. Are you right?

33:32

Well, back when I was seven, six, doing this madness using buckets.

33:37

- You can use mine. - No, bro. - You wouldn't share with me, your boy. - Look, it's... - Wow.

33:43

- I'm stressed. - Five bags?` - f*ck off. [James laughs] - I think they've private jetted to a stinker.

33:48

- Yeah. Yeah. Hundred percent they did. - They actually. - Yes. - Yep. - Maybe they actually didn't.

33:54

- You know, we've gone too far with this. When we think of looter, we think of private jet. [Simon laughs] That's not a good thing.

33:59

- Ethan put in the chat, he goes, "No Sidemen's ever gone to Looter without getting a private jet." - It's true. - I've been to Looter before.

34:05

[indistinct] a nice airport man. I just feel like, really happy. - Yeah. - Like, I'm just content, man.

34:10

I know nothing bad's happened now unless I get switched. If I get switched... - I don't know. I'm not going.

34:16

- [indistinct]. - I'd hide, I'd hide. I'll run away. - You won't find me again.

34:21

- I bet we're literally the only ones here. - You said yesterday it was fully booked. - Bullsh*t. Oh, is that a microwave?

34:29

- Nice. [laughs] You can microwave your meals, man. - There it is.

34:34

- JJ, you're sorted. - It's not all doom and gloom. Jeez. - I bet the, ugh. I bet the other teams' set up is mental.

34:43

- We tried to play tennis before that and we- - No, no. It was fun, though. - I played every week with my mum and I've improved now. - There's a basketball court as well.

34:49

- Improved. - I really wanna play basketball. - Do you? - Yeah. - There's a football up there as well. - Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. [indistinct].

34:54

- I'm confused. - Now, I won't lie. We've been sent here for pottery, right? But I would quite like to play some tennis there.

35:00

- Well, there's stuff. No, no. - But look, we've been bamboozled here. - There's football and there's basketball. - But there is also a man waiting there.

35:05

- Oh no. - We're being told to, - Oh, no, no. We're following. We'll go inside. - I'm the only person that's done three in a row. Every single Sidemen holiday I've been on the bad team

35:12

and every single time I'm like, I was bad this time but next time, you know, when it's even bigger and better,

35:18

I'll still be on the bad team. [JJ laughs] If I don't see Josh, he's dead to me. If I don't see that man in Sweden, he's dead to me.

35:27

Because every time he does this and we say, "It'd be nice if you checked in with the bad team."

35:32

Maybe just once. And he's like, yeah, sure. - Yeah, sure. - Ugh!

35:38

- Okay, let's do it. - All right. - Grab the wire. - Where's my wire gone? - Wire's falling down there.

35:45

- . Yes. - Okay, go for it. We wanna cut a slice of the clay. About a finger thick.

35:51

Maybe even a bit bigger. Thicker. You've got, you want something like a pancake.

35:56

Great, Harry. Well done. - Thank you. - Who wants to do number four? - Shotgun? Not. - Yeah. I'm more, I've hit a, I've hit my-

36:02

- I can't be assed to read. - Try some Kalles Kaviar. Get on a boat.

36:08

We did that in Amsterdam. Try and be original, Josh. Try the Swedish version of McDonald's. Try some Swedish candy.

36:14

Find outfits that match the Swedish flag. Try and eat some Surströmming.

36:20

- The f*ck is that? - I dunno. Attempt to buy alcohol at the Systembolaget.

36:26

Buy a sandwich cake. - I'll do that. I'm hungry. - There you go, boys. Get a photo with a group of blonde girls.

36:32

[quirky clarinet music] - Yay. - And then you can bring it back to your private jets.

36:40

So sh*t. - So do we have to do this? - [Voice Off Camera] Yeah. - Or what?

36:46

- Harry, you've done this before. A hundred percent. - I ain't done this, no way. - You added more clay. No, yours is looking good, man.

36:51

- Okay. - How does hers look so circular, man? - Innit? - It's kind of cool if it's not circular though, it needs a bit abstract.

36:56

- Little bit of character. - Yeah. - Are you saying hers has got more character than [indistinct]? - I think so. I think so.

37:01

[fist banging on table] - I am growing depressed.

37:07

- Alright, let's move it. Let's get on with our fun bingo, guys. Agh!

37:13

- It's okay, bro. - Yeah, I think it sucks this is your third time. - It's okay, man.

37:18

- This is your third time, like, getting wrecked. 'Cause not yet. The Ethan meme doesn't happen anymore.

37:25

- It's me. - It's actually just you. - And I even had the bad one with Harry. The Paris journey was absolute-

37:31

- Oh, sh*t. - hell as well. What did I do to deserve this? [Tobi giggles]

37:38

- So anti-clockwise we're saying. And this hand is helping and slightly down. - Oh, I've messed up.

37:43

- Nice. [Ethan laughing triumphantly] - I think I need help. - Place your knife in the one spot and just hold it down. No.

37:50

- No? [instructor laughs] What did I do wrong? - No. - I'll trade you that food for the room.

37:56

- I need my food. Food is more important than - Sleep? - Sleep.

38:01

- That smells [indistinct]. What is that? - Something chicken. - It does smell really good. I can't lie. Is that Ian? - Who's that? Ian?

38:06

Ian number? - Yeah, of course, bro. - Good thing you didn't tell Ian, "Oh look, I could end up in a hole with my boys."

38:11

- With my boys. - Can you just, can you spare some chicken and rice for the boys? Something. Because now this is worse. 'Cause I'm starving.

38:19

- What have you eating today? - Nothing. We're way the outside of Stockholm. - I had a customer.

38:25

- And now this guy is microwaving gourmet food in the aeroplane. [JJ giggles] - And then you turn it around and do the same on the other thick side.

38:31

So you end up with something like this. - That's a good sausage. That's a blessed sausage. I have very blessed sausage.

38:37

- A little tied up. - That's huge. - Bong.

38:42

- This is too big. No, this is the right size. - Yours is wham, bro.

38:48

- So you guys are just gonna watch me eat? - What the f*ck else is there to do? - Yeah.

38:53

- This is the first bit of entertainment Josh has put on for us. [Tobi laughs] - But at least you have a shower. - I don't, I just have a toilet and a sink.

39:00

I don't have a shower. I don't have a shower. [quirky piano music]

39:06

- Oh, I was so close to knocking that fork out of your hand, bro. - This is the kind of place Harry

39:13

would choose to stay. If they had this at at Gatwick, Harry would stay here. - He stayed in the crane in the Netherlands.

39:18

- You gotta have some finesse, bruv. - Yes. And I want you to roll. - I'm trying my best to do what you said.

39:24

- From the middle, from the middle. - Simon's actually low-key killing it in the background, man. He's staying quiet but he's rolling off a storm.

39:30

- I'm used to rolling, bro. - I feel like I'm disgracing the art of pottery. I dunno. I'm trying my best. - This is really nice, Harry.

39:37

- Okay. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. - Get on with our bingo card now. - Bro, I can hear the anger in your voice. You can't hide it. You can't mask it today, Vik.

39:44

I can hear it, brother. It's okay. - But it looks so fun.

39:49

- I think get a photo of a group of blonde girls would be very easy. - That's gonna be your highlight. - I mean, look, the minorities.

39:57

Well, I mean what? There's not many black and Indian people. - What has that got to do with getting a photo? - So all the girls will be flocking to us.

40:03

- Right? - It does work. - Flocking. - Look, look, look, look. Before you do it, just look. - Yep. - Down. Down.

40:09

- Ah, like that. Okay. Okay. I get you. - The movement is actually moving half of the clay. How would you call it?

40:14

- What I call it? sh*t. [Sidemen laugh] That's what I'd call it. That was great. What you did was phenomenal.

40:20

Why I did was sh*t. - How did you do that? - Look at Harry's, bro. - I just fiddled with it. Is all right?

40:25

- Yes, perfect. - Oh, thank you. Thank you. - Well look at Harry's. - I know. I'm just gonna finger mine and see what happens. - Woo! What happens if we get arrested?

40:32

We'll literally be more- - I reckon there's probably bad food behind bars. [JJ laughs] Not all of us were brief and brought back lunches, JJ.

40:41

Look at that hotel. Josh could have put us in there. Top two floors. 360 degree panoramic views.

40:48

Meanwhile, I'm in the baggage compartment. [Vik and JJ laugh] - Okay, so now I want you to start thinking,

40:54

what will your pot look like? - I'll take anything. I'll take anything, yeah.

40:59

- I just want it to be a pot. - Do you want it to have a belly? Do you want it to be a cylinder? Is it going-

41:07

- Anything that's doesn't leak? - Wow, Harry, bravo. - Oh bravo.

41:12

- Yours is wham, bro. I'm doing bit there. [Simon laughs]

41:18

- Yours doesn't look bad. - It doesn't look bad. - Love it.

41:23

- There it is. Biggest, biggest hospital in Europe. - 14 different buildings. - Combination there is probably better than us.

41:29

- Oh my gosh. - Darling, [indistinct]. - She's gonna look at it and go, "You are ready to be a dad." - I've made you. I've made you.

41:34

- Just tell her you dug it out of the ruins. - I've made you a fruit bowl. You can put one apple in it.

41:40

[Harry and Simon laugh] We've been looking for a fruit bowl. So. - I think you're still looking.

41:46

- It's [indistinct]. - As you can currently see, it's just straight vibes here.

41:51

Like excitement, energy, enthusiasm. - Vik, I still need food.

41:57

- This is getting screwed up. - This man has eaten himself into a food coma. - That was a big piece of chicken.

42:04

- Should have shared it. [Vik laughs] - Thank you. - Thank you. - It's cute.

42:10

[Harry laughs] - Not what you wanna hear. - Not what you wanna hear. - No!

42:15

- It's cute. - That's not a good sign. It's just getting rid of the lines, bro. Don't laugh.

42:22

- Do you think you could assemble some handles? - Yeah. That's not a problem. - We could maybe bail on this.

42:28

- Give us, give Harry that. - All right, I've been handed this envelope mid-handle pawn.

42:33

Before you've even had time to collect your thoughts, I've booked you more activities. - On a tennis court.

42:38

- Explore the hotel and play some sports. - Oh yes. - Ah, okay. - That tricky Zerkaa.

42:44

- Play all of them! - Oh, let's play some sports. - Oh, although I would like this to- - So can we leave these in your hands

42:52

to put handle on? - Sure. - Thank you. - Thank you so much. - Because if I do it, I'm gonna mess up. - Yeah. I feel like it goes from being okay

42:58

to being functional. - I'm actually really happy with how smooth I've made this. - You know what, boys? It's been a good shift. You know? - We've done well.

43:03

- It's been a good shift. - Go on. [Ethan laughs] [bouncy keyboard music]

43:16

- We've arrived, touchdown. - Vik's in better spirits now because the weather's nice. - And the city is beautiful. - And the city is beautiful.

43:21

- And the weather is beautiful, yeah. It's clean, it's efficient. And what's first job? - Food, please.

43:26

- So on our bingo card, our very thrilling bingo card, it says try MAX Burgers, which is their take on McDonald's,

43:33

which actually will probably be clear of McDonald's. I reckon. - I mean, there's only one way to find out, Vik.

43:38

- So five minutes down the road that way. Let's go get ourselves some MAX Burgers. - Oh, is it, - .

43:44

- Ay! - Ay! - I'm from Morocco, that's sick. Why can't we go to Morocco?

43:51

- We've been to Morroco. - Oh, we did. We did. We filmed the Sidemen Show. - I'll go back. - Oh, you had a great time.

43:56

Let's roll the clip of JJ and Ethan in Morocco. [Tobi laughs] Oh my goodness. - What was your greatest name? Abdullah.

44:01

[upbeat Morrocan music] [laughter]

44:11

- Oh God. - Oh bro, we've made so many videos. [Vik laughs] - It's hard to keep up, really. - It's very hard to keep up.

44:16

- Hey, shout out you lot for keeping up with all the videos. - Yeah, you lot probably know more about us than we know about ourselves. - I swear. They do.

44:22

You know when you walk up to someone and they bring up something that you have no idea that happened. - Yeah, I'm like, "I remember when you did this." And I was like,

44:27

- I did that? - Why did I do that? [percussive pop music]

44:35

- Alright. You ready, Harry? - I'm ready, son. I'm ready. - Okay. I am umpire. Heim is on Neil.

44:41

- Jesus Christ. - Hiem is on Neil still. - Look at- oh. - Oh.

44:47

- No lines. - You can see the scoreboard behind me. - Oh my God. Why are the people so beautiful? - Harry's fallen in love.

44:53

Harry's fallen in love. - Why doesn't it make noise? - Sweden, bro. - Can you hear that? - Yeah. - Is that for, like, deaf people?

44:59

- Blind people. - Blind people. [Tobi laughs] [upbeat pop music]

45:04

- Future here. - Damn. This looks good. - This actually looks incredible. Wow. - Brown barbecue chicken meal.

45:10

- Wow. Wow. - Incredible. - I'm kind of jealous. I can't lie.

45:16

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bro, they don't even call it halloumi. They call it grill-loumi. - Maybe add in a little fries in that food, bro.

45:23

- Gas. Do you want two? There we go.

45:28

Ah. - Ah. - Out! - 2-2. - There we go. We had a rally. - Yeah, we take that. We take that.

45:34

- What did you want? What'd you want? - Just a little fries and a little burger. - Little fries, little burger. - Little fries, little burger. - Little burger, little fries. - What, he literally brings his whole pack lunch

45:40

and says he's not gonna do this. - Hey. Yo. Yo. Now look, look, look. I'm training. Look, look. Duh-duh-duh.

45:46

- Premium shake. - Gimme that thing. - Look at this training. It's crazy. Oh. Oh, oh.

45:55

- Oh! - Oh. We have a rally on our hands.

46:01

[chuckles] Oh, oh!

46:08

- I lost two brain cells. [Vik laughs] Waiting for food. - I have yesterday's lucky winner, as you can hear.

46:15

Gone healthy. I made a last minute bail out and I've gone a little bit healthy. - Sup. - This is good, man. This is fast food out here.

46:23

My goodness. - At last, what I've been waiting for. - So is the cheese inside the chicken?

46:30

- It's underneath it, bro. - Is that cheese? That's mayonnaise. I think it's in the chicken.

46:37

[Tobi chuckles] - Oh, he's right. The cheese is inside the chicken. - They're ahead of the game here. They're levels above.

46:43

- I can't believe this. The food is amazing and I've never seen so many beautiful women in my life. - Welcome to Sidemen Tennis. We've got myself,

46:50

Ethan, Miniminter. And why is Kon here? We have got three lives each. If you mess up,

46:56

you lose a life. The first person to lose three lives does a shot. - Underarm.

47:01

- Ah. - It's all right. Okay. - Okay, come on.

47:09

Come on, Behz. Huge one. There it is! - I hate this game.

47:14

- That's a two. - It just don't work. Why did it, it just falls off the racket. - Can't wait to have to do 10K runs to burn it off.

47:22

[Tobi chuckles] Meanwhile, you've already burned it off. - I'm burning calories now.

47:27

- Give me your body, bro. - Wow. That was kind of crazy, man. - Little bit, man. - This is what happens when Simon's not around,

47:33

he starts to act up. - Oh, it's lovely. - Yours. - It's just what you wanna see. - Oh, nice.

47:39

- Yours. - Yes. - Go. [Harry yells]

47:44

- Love it. - Come on. Yes. [Harry and Ethan cheer]

47:50

- No. - It's you. - [indistinct].

47:55

[buzzer beep] - That's double. - That's me. That's me. - Right. What else have we got? - All right, so- - So we've done MAX Burgers.

48:00

- Try Swedish version on McDonald's. MAX burgers. [Tobi belches] Nice. Done. So we could try some Kalles Kaviar.

48:07

Let's save that for dinnertime, I think. - Okay. We got some Swedish candy we can try. - This guy's just trying to make you look unhealthy.

48:13

- Try and eat Surströmming. It sounds weird. - Is it all food? - Surströmming. - Yeah. What's he trying to do?

48:18

- Excuse me? Do you know what Surströmming is? - Surströmming? Yes. It's a fish.

48:24

- Yeah, it's [indistinct]. - Oh. Ugh. Where do you think we'll be able to find that?

48:29

- Any store, you can find. - Any store? Oh wow. - Boys, we gotta do it over. They can't be having this. They can't be having this.

48:35

- All right. Just don't, look, as long as they don't win the point, we won't lose.

48:42

- We're doing it. We're doing it. Oh God. - Sorry. Sorry, sorry.

48:48

- I like this dog. Can we have [indistinct]? [suspenseful symphony music]

48:55

[Harry yells] Oh, okay. We'll play this game, boy. [buzzer beep]

49:00

He's out! - He's out. He's out. - Wait, so do we carry on? - Yeah, it's just you.

49:05

You lost a teammate. - Okay. Yeah, you're out. You're out. You're doing the first shot. - I do a little YouTube video. - Really?

49:10

- Yeah. - Small one. A small one. - What's your name? - Sidemen. Yeah. You might find some funny things or not.

49:16

[Vik laughs] - We should beat him as two V one. - We should, but I'm a one. - Two V one. - I'm a one.

49:22

- I'll take it. [suspenseful symphony music] - Communication will get us through. - That's yours. That's yours. [Ethan laughs]

49:28

- Lovely. - Huge. That's yours again. [Harry and Ethan exclaim] - I'm doing no shot, bro.

49:35

I just gotta beat you once. - Ay-yay-yay. [suspenseful symphony music]

49:40

Whoa. Stay in. [Harry shrieks]

49:47

- Ah! I didn't know which way you were gonna go. All right, one a piece. [suspenseful symphony music]

49:55

- No. Yes. Ah!

50:00

Mad. - Down the line!

50:06

- No! - Yeah! He's done it. - Well played, man, well played.

50:11

- Do you know where we can find the sandwich cake or Swedish candy?

50:17

- Where can't you find Swedish candy? - If you want to go inside and look for the menu. The [indistinct] menu

50:23

- Or do you have surströmming? - No. - Well, then what's the the point? - Surströmming's not good. - Why would we go in there?

50:30

- Surströmming's not very good. - Everyone's telling us it's not good. - Where can we find this? - The sandwich cake.

50:35

- You can find this in the supermarket. - Okay. We need to go to a supermarket. - Where's the nearest supermarket? - You go straight and then-

50:41

- Oh, let's go to the subway. Yeah. - He wanted us to go on subway anyway. - All right, thank you guys. - Thank you. - Take care. To the subway.

50:48

- We all know you love our basketball videos. - Yes! - So we've decided to play SDMN instead of Horse.

50:53

- Yes. - You have to shoot from there. Once you get it in, you move to there. Once you get that in, you move to there. Once you get that in, you move halfway.

50:59

- Couple hoopers! - Loser does a shot. - Yes. Ethan's first. - Yeah. - We got heat stroke as well. So those [indistinct].

51:04

- Yeah! - Come on. Go on, Behz. Drained it. First time. - Easy. - Easy money. Oh!

51:10

- This is so unfair 'cause we recorded this a minute ago. - No, no, no. What are you talking about? What are you talking about? - John corrupted the file.

51:17

- So show them what you did, Simon. Show what you did. Show what you did. - All right, you wanna see what I did? - Pretty simple. - Go on.

51:22

- Ooh. Oh, Simon. - No! - Not losing to someone who's five foot eight. - There's no need for that.

51:28

- Surely not. - What he was trying to do is this. [loud upbeat hip hop music] - Oh my God!

51:36

- All right, so we recorded this the first time and they were struggling. - [indistinct] the proof.

51:43

[Ethan laughs] Let's see the proof! - I'm never coming back. - Where is this thing?

51:49

How you doing? - I'm big fan. - Thank you man. Appreciate it. Pretty famous in Sweden, man. - To be fair, that's probably, I haven't seen,

51:55

I haven't seen another person, - Scandinavia loves us. - I've not seen a single other person with dreadlocks. - Should we go over there?

52:00

- What are we looking for? Outfits? - To be fair, we do need to get outfits. - Yeah. - Don't forget. It's like, in England we can blend in.

52:06

- Oh, oh, oh, oh. - Sweets. Ooh. This one. - Choose. - This looks good.

52:11

- I guess I'll get [indistinct]. - . [laughs] [high pitched laugh]

52:18

[Ethan laughs] - I swear, if I get stuck here. - It's okay. It's okay. You can do it. - No, he'll break through it.

52:23

It's all in your head, son. It's all in your head. [Ethan and Harry laugh]

52:29

- In the Jordans. Pan down. Pan down to the Jordans. - .

52:35

- You've got the jumpers on. [laughs] - What is this stance? - Measured.

52:40

Oh, he's measured! Oh, he's measured it. - Come on, come on.

52:46

- That's not. - I can't believe what I'm seeing. - He measured it. - This is futuristic, bro.

52:52

- How does it work? - You self check out here. - Oh wow. - Look at this. Wait, they trust us enough

52:57

to do our own shopping here. - Yeah, never in London. - That's crazy. - In London we're walking out- - Wait, surely we could just walk away.

53:04

- We're not gonna do that. - All right, we're doing our live taste test with an audience that we have summoned. - We have summoned by literally just being here.

53:12

- Guys, what is your favourite candy out of these three? Which is the best? - This one. - All of you say that.

53:17

- . - Oh, you picked some dead thing then. - The pink one's the best?

53:22

Mmm. - Holy sh*t, that's sweet. - Oh wow. Oh wow. That's really good.

53:28

- . [relaxed rock music] - Slippery Simon. [Simon cheers] - Got it! He's done it.

53:33

- f*ck, he's gonna overtake me now. Got this. - Oh!

53:42

Thank God. - Oh! We stink. - Go on, Harold. [laughs]

53:48

- Can I have a quick pass, maybe? - Ready? - Yeah. - Okay. [relaxed rock music]

53:54

Oh! - Not bad. - You know Americans are like hating our guts right now. - Oh yeah. But they're not enjoying this.

53:59

You know what? We can just cut out all the misses. - Hey. Call me LeBron Pain.

54:04

- I hope this doesn't go in. All right, Yeah-Minter. [relaxed rock music]

54:12

- Shoot the shoot - Drained it. [Sidemen cheer] - Wow, it's just like we're doing a YouTube video, but there's no camera in front of us. [laughs]

54:20

Like the audience. The audience is just- Right. Should we carry on moving? That's crazy, man. We did a flash mob by accident.

54:27

[Tobi laughs] We literally did a flash mob, but taste testing some candy. - What's the colours of Sweden again?

54:32

- Oh. Oh. - Oh, I think Vik's got one. He's good. I can't wear Nike. Straps over checks. - If you make this shot,

54:38

your firstborn is fit and healthy. - Go on, Behz. You got this. - Oh my god. I don't claim that bit. I don't claim that bit.

54:46

- There's a lot on the line here, lad, come on. Will she have seven toes? [Ethan laughs]

54:51

Will he have a nose for a foot? - It's a f*cking [indistinct]. [laughs]

54:59

- Oh no! - Not my kid! - No! - If this goes in, she'll be normal.

55:06

- Stop saying she, we don't even know yet. - Okay, if this goes in, it'll be normal. - Nice. Thanks. - We can't be doing this.

55:12

- Oh no! [Ethan laughs] - So Sweden colours are blue and yellow. - Yes. - That right? Okay.

55:18

- You knew that. - But you knew that. - Yeah, 'course. - You knew that. - You didn't know that, did you? - Lowkey forgot. - Right. What else we gotta do?

55:24

We need outfits as well at some point. - We could just steal it from people. Steal their clothes.

55:31

- I'll swap your clothes for a picture. Let's have [indistinct]. - Interesting. [Sidemen laugh]

55:37

- God, we honk. - Yes. Now there he goes. [Ethan and Harry cheer] Join us.

55:42

- Yeah, but talk to me. - I hate to leave you lot. - Oh yeah? Oh no. Surely not [indistinct] join us.

55:49

[Ethan laughs] - This where stuff's going nuts for me. - You going mad? Alright, let's see it.

55:55

- f*ck off. All I know is bucket, baby. - All right, this one's for Ruth. - Yeah. Hundred percent. Say less, mummy's boy.

56:01

[fart noise] Oh! - Who farted? - I didn't fart, that was Ethan.

56:07

- I said I'm mummy's best. - No, he farted. - I'm telling you, this place is in the future. They've got like fake windows cause we're inside.

56:14

They're playing bird sounds. You can win prizes from buying toilet tickets. Mate. This place is, Sweden's clear.

56:21

Look at this. They got smart mirrors in the toilet. It's like, what do you mean?

56:27

Bro, I can do my BMI, my blood pressure, body fat index. Start.

56:33

How's this gonna work? - Stand still and upright. - Oh my goodness. It's happening. [loud beeps]

56:41

- You are morbidly obese. - Geez. - You're weighing more than me, bro. - It said I'm good. It said I'm blessed.

56:46

- You're weighing more than me. - Don't mess up. I at least want two people on there. Please. [rhythmic pop music]

56:52

We are f*cking weak, bro. - This game is painful. - Oh, oh. - No, you actually stink though.

56:58

Yeah. I really am honking there. - Go on, Behz. Let's go home. [music intensified]

57:03

[Sidemen cheer] - He's done it. - He's done it.

57:10

- There's no need for that. There's kids about, there's kids about, there's kids about, look. - Got a good track record in half courts.

57:17

[indistinct] sports. Sidemen channel. Sidemen channel. - Fair play, man. All right. Now see who does the shot.

57:23

- I'm almost overweight. - You're not almost overweight. - I'm almost overweight down, bro. - You're not almost overweight. - Bro, I'm 23.4 and the normal is between 18.5 and 24.9.

57:33

I got my stats. - Wait, what? How do you do that? - It just does it all for you, bro. - For free?

57:38

- Yeah. Imagine if England had this, bro? People would actually care about their health. - Yeah. - They get told they're morbidly obese

57:44

and they might do something about it. - So what, do you just go on? - Just stand on it, yeah. - Lemme take off my shoes. Oh.

57:50

- You could have had six foot, bro. What you doing? - You could have six foot, bro. - His hair gives him a boost.

57:56

- 183 centimetres. - It is not 183, bro, his hair's cheating. - 87 kg. - Did you wish to measure your body fat index?

58:02

Hold the handles as shown in the picture. - 45. That can't be right.

58:07

- You know I'm overweight. It says I'm overweight. - You're 26 BMI though. - Collect your ticket.

58:13

- Yeah. That is overweight. You are fine. You're not overweight. - Your ticket ain't coming out either, now who's laughing. - Oh sh*t.

58:18

- Shoes on. Let's go. - Alright. Well RIP. - Oh my God. Oh my God!

58:24

Oh. - Simon. Like, realistically, it's a free throw. - Yeah, you just do that.

58:29

[rhythmic pop music] - Oh my God.

58:35

- Good line. - Then he killed Kirsty. - Oh, fool! - Filthy. Naughty. Dirty.

58:41

- Good night. - Got an arch on him. - Oh, good night. - Yeah. That's me done. That's me done.

58:46

- You did a shot. - Football. - Yes. Take me to a different sport. - Wait, where are we going?

58:52

- To the central station. - To the station. - Cause it's sick. It's sick. It puts the London underground to shame. - Vik, you've been saying this the whole time.

58:59

I better not be underworld. - You will not be underworld. - The toilets are pretty damn, - Puts the whole of London to shame.

59:04

- Those are toilets worth paying for. Unlike the f*cking ones in England. - Yeah. I still got the ticket for something.

59:09

- You can win something. I saw. - Ah. - If you buy a toilet ticket, you could win a prize. - Pee to win.

59:15

- You are big. You're big. - Are you ready? You ready? - Ready. - You ready?

59:21

This is what we call the Sidemen special. Oh, oh, oh. - Oh.

59:26

- Oh. No. Harry. [Harry and Ethan sputtering] - Why did he put Harry on top? - That is fine! That is fine!

59:33

This body is so compressed. [Harry laughs] - You ready? - Ow. Owee.

59:39

- Move forward, move forward. - You have to dribble. You have to dribble. - Oh my God.

59:46

Shoot! [Sidemen cheer]

59:52

Oh, my spine. - Ah, you're all right. - A Sweden top. - Oh yeah, that is [indistinct]. - Oh. This could be a trial.

59:57

- Someone has to call. - Yeah, let's get Sweden tops. Technically I can get a Man United top, but why would I wanna wear that?

1:00:02

- Why? It's not the right colours. - No, the blue away strip. - Wait, it's yellow and blue, isn't it? - Yeah.

1:00:08

- Blue and yellow. They've only got it in large. - Look, look outside. Why are we just getting stalked by crowd of people?

1:00:17

There's just a crowd everywhere we go. - True, this is probably part of the bad team. Isn't it?

1:00:23

This works. - There you go. - Can I get this as well, please? - Did you do the clothes? Have you've done the question yet, JJ, do the question.

1:00:28

Take it out. - All right, let's do it. Let's do it. Let's do it. - Right. So they've got a YouTube channel in Sweden. Like, this is a once in lifetime opportunity.

1:00:35

They wanna ask KSI one question. They're doing their own one question. - One question. Go. - Live in Stockholm in the car.

1:00:41

- Meanwhile, I'm paying for JJ's clothes. [Vik laughs] - So we have four shots. - Yes.

1:00:47

- We have three for tennis. - Yeah. - Which go to Ethan, Kon, and Harry. - Thank you, my friend. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. - Cheers, boys

1:00:52

- Cheers. - Cheers to tennis. We stunk. - That's a great sport. That one. - And then basketball.

1:01:00

- Harry. I feel like I should have probably done one with you there. I mean, I'll have one. - How's that? - A bit much. I won't lie. A bit much.

1:01:06

- Yeah. Yeah. - That fermented. Like I drank sand. - Get me to a soccer pitch. - It's wrapped. It's wrapped.

1:01:12

I just looked at the door and there's just more and more people holding their phones, just streaming into the shop.

1:01:17

Cause obviously they're getting messages from other people. We're going viral.

1:01:23

That's actually, that's drip. That is actually, you stand out even more. - Yeah. It's perfect.

1:01:28

- Which is fantastic. - Feel like I'm about to go for a quick run. - I think Man's a bit of a cop-out still. I'm just wearing a Manny lads top.

1:01:34

- Yeah. Yeah, yeah. - You know what? You know what? You've been made to wear some terrible football kits in your time.

1:01:39

- I deserve this. - So we'll let you off. - You lot got me [indistinct] with t-shirt. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what? Fine, fine.

1:01:46

[JJ laughs] What's going on, guys? What's up? Jeez. All right, what's up, what's up.

1:01:55

- Oh my god, yo. Stockholm's shut down, bro. - .

1:02:00

[Harry grunts] It's go time, baby. - Okay, I'll go in that first. - Okay. We're taking three each.

1:02:06

- Yes. - Whoever has the lowest after the three does a shot. - Again? - Yeah. - But enough.

1:02:12

- Oh! I'm so used to my left foot. - Oh, he's done it!

1:02:17

- Almost. - My f*cking hips. - Straight into the [indistinct]. [rhythmic pop music]

1:02:24

- For f*ck's sake. - He chose your [indistinct]. - Sweden, Sweden, Sweden,

1:02:30

- When do you fight Jake Paul? - Probably next year. - JJ, we're ready for you to f*ck him up.

1:02:36

- I know. Soon. Soon, bro. Soon. [Vik and Tobi giggling] [Sidemen giggling]

1:02:42

- It's a long day. - Oh God. - This doesn't. - It's a long day.

1:02:48

- Okay. We're looking for the fish. JJ, show us your thing. What are we looking for? - Something, it's like strumming. Something strumming.

1:02:54

- Surströmming? - Yeah. - Do you know where we can get surströmming? - Right. We have to move.

1:03:00

We have to move. We just have to keep moving. We're gonna go now, guys. Thanks everyone. No, we're done. We're done. We can't.

1:03:07

- We're done, bro. We can't go anywhere. We're too- - We got kicked out, by the way. We got kicked out of the supermarket because there was-

1:03:13

- I mean, the guy was about to, was calling the police. - He was calling security. We can't do anything. We can't go in shops anymore.

1:03:19

- Pack him in. - Did that go in? - Yeah. - Oh, Jesus Christ.

1:03:25

- Fair enough. Yes. Yes. - I thought that was miles over. That was a nice go. - do a miss here.

1:03:31

We need to, for the greater good he needs to miss this one. - I'll tell you which side if you want. - Yeah. Go ahead. Yeah.

1:03:37

- f*ck. - Behz. - I know, that was a banger, that was a banger. - I'm scared for my wrist, though. - Yeah, but I don't need you,

1:03:43

you have with the applause every video, man. I want to see you miss. - Scared of my wrist as well. I don't wanna hurt it.

1:03:50

- f*ck sake, man. Ah! - You've missed the goal twice. I'm going off Ethan's.

1:03:56

- No, no, no, no. Let's not change the rules now. No, no. - What, you think I can't save his goal? You think I can't save his shot?

1:04:02

When, when stuff's [indistinct]. I've got this every day of the week. - f*ck's sake. - Yeah. How's that?

1:04:07

How's that going? How's that going? - Yes! - Well, he is lost. - Yes, he's lost again. - Right, recap.

1:04:13

We got kicked out of the supermarket 'cause there were too many people following us in there. So we can't go in populated areas because we accumulate

1:04:19

a hoard [JJ laughs] and they don't make the fish anymore. So what have we got left? - We've got the sandwich cake.

1:04:24

Apparently, that's really good. - We're not doing bad. Right? We need to buy alcohol. Get a sandwich cake.

1:04:30

- Honestly, I think we did take plenty of photos with a group of blonde girls. - There were a few. There were a few.

1:04:35

- There were brunette girls, no blondes. I didn't see any blondes. - Harry's got his eye out for the blondies. [Tobi laughs]

1:04:41

Let's get on a boat. - Let's get on a boat. - The water is that way. Let's just go and get on a boat and escape. - Chances are there'll be blonde girls on a boat.

1:04:47

- Simon, put it top. - Oh! - All right, Harry, go on then - Sudden death, right?

1:04:54

- You have your final one. - You're done. - Am I done? - Well, take your final one. - You can have it if you want. - You've lost.

1:05:00

- You got two. - I have got two. [upbeat electronic music]

1:05:06

- Oh. - I tried to put an anchor on it. - What was that? - I tried to put an anchor on it.

1:05:11

- Oh, you gotta go first. Sudden death. - Undefeated in the net I am.

1:05:18

- Oh, he's pouncing. He's ready to pounce. - He really wants me to kick over there. - Sorry, Will.

1:05:25

- Oh my God. - Oh! It's a banger. Well, at least we don't have to have a shot. - Yeah, true. Yeah, you do.

1:05:31

- Can we do a crossbar challenge? [Ethan laughs] ♪ This trip has taken a toll on me ♪

1:05:37

♪ Josh said bad team too many times before ♪ [Tobi and Vik laugh]

1:05:46

- So far, Harry has lost every single sport. - Well, there's no need for that. - He has requested a crossbar challenge, so.

1:05:51

You can go first. - Okay. You know what boys, I've been disrespected too much here. - Yeah. Oh!

1:05:56

- Oh. The Bug special. - I actually can't go out this time either. - Alright. Do you know what kind of day it is? - What?

1:06:02

- It's a crossbar day. - Oh. If he did it, I'd [indistinct]. - He didn't. ♪ Save us Josh ♪

1:06:08

♪ Save us because we're getting mobbed and touched ♪ ♪ in so many places ♪

1:06:14

- We're going on a boat, boys. - We are going on a boat. So we thought what kind of boat would serve us best?

1:06:20

One, away from the hoard following us. And two, one that serves alcohol. - I keep think you're saying whores, bro.

1:06:25

- Ah, fresh air, freedom. Sunshine. - There's no children about. Made it onto the boat, boy. - Just as everything's been going. It's not going well.

1:06:33

They've got no seats on the top of the boat. So we're going in the boat, I think. - And just peace. Eating quiet.

1:06:40

- You know what? - Luxurious. - This one is for Simon Minter. - Okay. - It's time to f*cking smash it.

1:06:47

[electronic music stops abruptly] - It's the post. But that was unbelievable. - And he did smash it. - That was unbelievable.

1:06:55

- Yeah. Nice try. - You hit the post, Simon. Nice work. - Should we just do the post challenge? - Yeah. - Oh my God.

1:07:01

[Sidemen cheer] - He's done it! Fair play.

1:07:06

Unless we both hit it right now. - Unless we both hit it. - Please. Let me have something. Let me have something. - If we both hit it right now, we carry on.

1:07:12

- No. - .

1:07:18

- You've let him down, man. - . - One of us has to have a shot. Who's it gonna be?

1:07:27

- f*cking hell. It's fine, f*ck it. - Oh, that's it.

1:07:33

- I was just playing around for the song. - I know, I know how you do, man. - See, I'm happy now. This is, I'm in my element, bro. I was stressed before.

1:07:39

- I could tell. We were sitting on the side of the street and Tobi and JJ are shouting at me, "Get me on a boat."

1:07:45

[Tobi laughs] "Take me to a boat." Get in the taxi and say, "Drive to a boat." - wanted to walk.

1:07:51

[Simon clapping] - Another envelope. - But why is it yellow this time? - I don't know. And I don't like that. - I think they ran out.

1:07:56

- After tonight, you won't be feeling any thinner. Head to the terrace to enjoy your own private dinner.

1:08:02

- Yes. - Oh, I really do want be thinner. - I'm trying to lose some weight here. - Oh no.

1:08:08

- Can we go for a swim first? - Yeah. - I want little dip, little dip. - Should we FaceTime the boys?

1:08:13

- No. No. I'm having a good moment. - You've been putting this off the whole time.

1:08:20

- Ignorance is place. The less I know about what they're doing, the better. - Hello, gang. Where are you? - Hi. So we're in Sweden.

1:08:26

- Sweden. - Sweden. That's nice. - We're in Greece. [Good team laughs]

1:08:31

- [indistinct]. - Do you wanna see this? One second, lads. - This is what we've been doing for the last hour and a half. - So we've had basketball here, football over here,

1:08:39

[indistinct]. - You don't wanna see this, do you? - The sun is shining, it's 30 degrees.

1:08:46

Bug's having a great time. - Hotel room costs 40 grand a night. - Yes. We've been staying at three levels.

1:08:52

- Three stories. - Three stories. - Wait, it costs how much a night? - 30 grand a night. - My hotel room has three stories as well.

1:09:00

You go in on one level, you go up, there's like a level with, like a, a bathroom, and you go up again and there's the bedroom.

1:09:07

It's quite sick actually. - Yeah. - You look like you're having fun though. Also got good time. - We've literally had the worst time ever, fam.

1:09:14

[Tobi and Vik laugh] - Bro, we're so like, not to be up our own ass, but we are so famous, bro. It's really-

1:09:21

[Good team laughs] - Like literally everywhere we went, everywhere we went, we just get mobbed.

1:09:27

- 50 people followed us. - You look good in that shirt. - JJ, I like your shirt. - They like your shirt. - You like our shirts? Sweden. - Oh, Sweden.

1:09:33

- Well, not Tobi's. Not Tobi's. - Is Zerkaa with you? - No. Is he not with you?

1:09:38

- No. - Oh. - And before he's just streaming Tommy T. - He might be at home.

1:09:43

- Oh my God. - If I had to guess, he's coming here. I won't lie. - I think he's on his way. - I think he's coming here.

1:09:48

- This is number three. Ethan, you're my boy. Ethan, you're on my boy. This is three holidays. This is three.

1:09:56

- Oh no. Also, Vik, we're about to go swimming in the most picturesque bay. - I hope you drown. I hope a jellyfish stings you.

1:10:02

[Good team laughs] - We'll send you a video. - We'll send you a picture and a video. - And then we got a private dinner on a terrace later, so.

1:10:09

- Oh, lovely. Fantastic. - f*ck. - We'll send you videos now. One second. [indistinct]. - Can you stop showing me your nipple, bro?

1:10:16

- Oh. [laughs] - Listen, you boys enjoy. We'll, just- - I'm just saying, it feels a little racist.

1:10:22

[Vik and good team laugh] - I didn't say it. Listen, if I said it, they'll say, "Tobi always makes it about race." But if KSI says it,

1:10:30

it's funny. [giggles] Yep. Okay. I'll just let you know as well. We're sleeping on a plane hotel. Okay. Bye.

1:10:37

- It sucks. It sucks. - JJ's room is in an engine. - It sucks. - JJ's basically inside, inside and engine. [Good team laughs]

1:10:42

- And it's terrible. - I'll send you a video of our room. - All right, love. - Bye.

1:10:48

- I'm, you know, I'm glad they're having a good time. I actually am. I genuinely am. - Bro, shut up. - I know. I actually am.

1:10:54

- You're cappin'. - I'm not convinced right now by you. [Tobi and Vik laugh]

1:11:00

- No. Seeing that smile really brought my day up. [Tobi and Vik laugh] [high-energy electronic music]

1:11:16

- Deary me. [blows raspberry] It doesn't get very deep. - Oh, it's not tropical.

1:11:21

- Honestly, when you get further in, it's nice. - Ooh. - Ooh. Oh, it's not tropical.

1:11:27

- Oh, it, ooh. - This was a better idea about two hours ago. - Oof. Oh, my penis is inside itself.

1:11:33

[Vik chuckles] - I was about to wreck you, boy. - I was gonna get violated.

1:11:38

- So violated. - I could tell. Right, back to supermarkets. Yeah.

1:11:43

- Come on, my boys. - This way. - Well, you know where we're going, right? Yeah. - This way. This guy, man, brings his packed lunches,

1:11:49

[Tobi laughs] then has three bags of sweets and two cocktails. [Tobi laughs] Unbelievable.

1:11:55

- Mocktails. - Mocktails. But there's hella sugar in there. - Yeah. I know. - Let's play game. Let's play a game. Let's play word association. If you lose, you dunk yourself.

1:12:02

[All laugh] - Can we have lives? - You can have two lives. - Oh, wait, wait. Let me at least get my dick in.

1:12:08

- Ah. - Boys, we're in Greece. We're fine. Come on. [Ethan laughs]

1:12:15

- Word association with categories. - Categories. [Simon yells] - Alright. 3, 2, 1. FIFA YouTubers.

1:12:20

- Oakelfish. - AJ3Fifa. - MattHDGamer. - Miniminter. - Jack54HD. - The [indistinct]. - [indistinct].

1:12:26

- Behzinga. - [indistinct]. - Danny Aarons. - [indistinct]5000. - KSI. [Simon shrieks]

1:12:32

- I don't like the categories, bro. - Look, we could go and play B-ball just like them if we wanted to.

1:12:37

Should we go shoot some hoops? - Should we do it? - Should we challenge 'em to a game? - Yeah. - Not to a game. - Let's do it.

1:12:43

- Not to a game. Let's not embarrass ourselves. - Let's do it. - I'll be so embarrassed. - We're gonna stink. - I see you have some skills. You wanna play?

1:12:50

[Fans making shocked noises] - You guys wanna play? - Can I take a picture? - No, no, no. We'll take a photo if you beat us.

1:12:57

- If you can score more hoops than him, you can have a picture. - Oh Lord. - All right, that was my practise.

1:13:03

You wanna go first? - You go first. - Three shots. Three shots. - All right. Here we go.

1:13:08

[quirky jazz music] - Drained it. - Okay. Okay. - Drained it.

1:13:14

- Premier league football teams. - Okay. We can do that. - Arsenal. - West Ham. - Uh.

1:13:19

[All exclaim] - I was gonna say [indistinct] as well. [Simon laughs] - I was gonna say [indistinct] but I was like,

1:13:25

nah, they're not yet. I couldn't. - Me and you are the rope team. - I know. - Chocolate bars. Kit-Kat. - Milky Bars.

1:13:31

- Snickers. - Galaxy. - Double Decker. - Mars. - Galaxy Caramel.

1:13:36

- Double chocolate caramel. - What? Double chocolate? Double chocolate caramel? - No. No.

1:13:41

- [laughing] What is double chocolate caramel? Double chocolate-

1:13:46

- I'm not gonna lie. I was out after that. - Okay. Don't let us down. - Yeah, yeah. [indistinct].

1:13:51

- Don't last down, Jif. - No pressure. - Ah!

1:13:57

We're okay, we'll win it. [quirky jazz music] [gathered people exclaim]

1:14:03

- Back in. - All right, all right. - Do this.

1:14:09

- Bro! I keep hitting the rim. All right, if you get this, you win. - If you score this, you get a photo.

1:14:16

Oh, nothing but net! - Yes. You can take a photo. - Consoles. PlayStation one.

1:14:21

- Nintendo Wii. - PlayStation 2. - PlayStation 3. - PlayStation 4. - PlayStation 5. - Xbox.

1:14:26

- Xbox One. - Xbox 360. - Xbox Series X. - 3DS. - Nintendo Switch. - The original Game Boy.

1:14:32

- Game Boy Advance. - Game Boy Colour. - PlayStation Portable, f*ck! - Yeah.

1:14:37

- Is that a thing? - Yeah, keep going. - Uh... [Ethan and Harry cheer]

1:14:46

- Lord, forgive me. - I can't believe I've had it. [Simon yells] Pulled portable out of my ass. f*ck it.

1:14:54

- Your Xbox series X threw me. - He's going for the dunk.

1:15:02

- Again. Set me up. - All right. Tobi's last shot of the day. He's coming in, Tobi. [Sidemen cheer]

1:15:08

- Wait, wait. Steve, can you dunk? - Can he dunk? [Sidemen chant "Steve! Steve! Steve!"]

1:15:18

- Oh. - Steve, [indistinct]. So like, you just walk up to the thing and just-

1:15:23

[crowd cheers] - Meanwhile. [Tobi grunts]

1:15:30

- I am about to get out. This is absolutely freezing. - Much better when you're swimming. Let us know if you hit the bottom.

1:15:35

- I will. - Let us know if you're dead.

1:15:40

Watch him. He's standing. Standing at the bottom. - That was fun. Wasn't on the bingo card, but we did it anyway.

1:15:46

- Can't we stop that for the fish? - Yeah. Honestly. [Sidemen laugh] Why don't we trade that for the fish? They don't make the fish.

1:15:53

- They don't make the fish. - We spoke to 50 people. They were like, yeah, no, it's not good. - Yeah, it's not the one.

1:15:58

- Literally. I've never seen it. Everyone literally said it's sh*t from the get go. No one said they liked it. - Why do you want this?

1:16:03

[upbeat tropical music]

1:16:09

- Cheers, boys, cheers. What a lovely day. - Cheers, cheers, cheers. - What a lovely day. What a lovely day. - Lovely candlelit dinner.

1:16:15

I've just got ringing in my left ear. - I've got aftershave in my eye. It really hurts. - We're falling apart, lads.

1:16:21

- it's been a lot - oh! Please. - Couscous with a little bit of pine

1:16:26

and Greek traditional tzatziki. - Thank you so much. - Could I just have that?

1:16:31

- Of course. [Sidemen laugh] - Oh no, I was actually serious. I will eat it. - [indistinct] traditional [indistinct].

1:16:37

- Ohh. - Whew. - Oh my God. - Well, you just knew that was gonna happen. - So we agree. We double dip now. We just, we just, yeah.

1:16:45

- We've all kissed. - Literally eaten his ass. - Who? - What?

1:16:50

- Kanelbullar. Hasbulla. Sorry. [laughs] - Yeah. I think it's an L with this fish.

1:16:56

- Who's looking to see if they got a fish? - We asked. - Yeah, we asked. And she was like, we don't have that. - This is just sh*t, isn't it?

1:17:02

We're just f*cking wandering around in Stockholm asking people where to find a fish.

1:17:10

[Tobi chuckles] - What? [Tobi chuckles evilly] - What are you, what? - Don't worry about me, bro. I just love Sweden.

1:17:16

- Where them blondes at, bro? - Where the blondes at? - Where them buns at?

1:17:22

- Where them buns. - That bread is elite. - I'm about to eat my body weight in bread. - Yeah.

1:17:27

- [indistinct]? - Yes, please. Thank you very much. I'm a happy fat now. Just wanna eat some more bread.

1:17:33

This bread is unreal, but I'm gonna put, - I've made a mess already. - I'm gonna put on so much weight. - I've made such a mess already.

1:17:39

- You've got a stain on your t-shirt already? You've made a mess, bruv. - Hey, do you serve sandwich cake? - Sandwich cake. I think you need to go to [indistinct].

1:17:49

- Okay. How long? - 200 metres. - Oh, that's okay. - We'll give it a look. Thank you.

1:17:55

- You know, NPCs are giving us a really good quest here. There's lots of different stages. JJ, what's the alcohol place called?

1:18:00

- I don't know. Something about strumming your mom or something. I don't know. - That's the fish bro. - That's the fish.

1:18:05

- Oh. - Question. Where is Josh? Like where is he? - He's not answering his mobile. We dunno where Zerkaa is.

1:18:12

- I'm waiting for him to walk up here. - You're like, oh my God, it's Zerkaa's music. He bursts through the door. [Ethan laughs] [indistinct] do it.

1:18:18

- By God. - Any ideas on what might be happening tomorrow? - Boats. - Boat day. - Boat day tomorrow.

1:18:23

- We've all decided tomorrow's a boat day. Even if it's not, it is. - We'll find a boat. We'll command the boat.

1:18:29

- There's no way I'm not getting on a boat tomorrow. - Commandeer a boat. - Can I bark at this dog? - No. - Yeah. Go and do it.

1:18:35

- No, no, no. [JJ barks] [Dog barks]

1:18:40

[Sidemen laughs] That's peak. That's actually peak.

1:18:46

- What's wrong with me? [laughs] - Map says it's here, but where is it? - Where are you taking us, Vik?

1:18:51

We could have just gone to the bakery like he told us. - What's going on? - I thought- - We should stop thinking and just do what we're told.

1:18:57

- Bro, I'm just trying to find the [indistinct]. - Yep, yep. - Okay. At least I'm not talking to dogs. [Sidemen laugh]

1:19:04

- JJ, behave. - JJ, don't do it. - Okay. [barks] [Dog barks] [Sidemen laugh]

1:19:11

- So peak. - Alright. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. [Sidemen laugh] - He has to be here 'cause he is not gonna be in Sweden

1:19:16

with them. - I'm telling you. We're getting a boat tomorrow and he will turn up. He'll be on the boat. - So what's he on today then? Just like, chilled out?

1:19:22

- He's gonna be on the boat with Randy. - You know what, a bucket. Josh and Randy on a boat tomorrow with-

1:19:28

- Although Laura is about to give birth, so- - But he'll leave her for that. - Yeah. [Ethan laughs]

1:19:34

- When the boys come calling. - Yeah. [quirky symphony music] - Well, just pick something, innit it.

1:19:39

- I've got it. [Sidemen laugh] - Wow. What an exciting challenge completed, boys.

1:19:45

- Wow. - I can't wait to drink this. - Josh. - You know how it tastes. - Josh, you are actually a wizard.

1:19:53

- Oh my goodness. Oh, it's, wow! [Sidemen laugh] I'm having the best day.

1:19:59

- Fantastic. - Happiness in a can. - Huzzah.

1:20:05

- I weighed myself downstairs. - I weighed myself. What was you? - 80. - Wow. - Point seven.

1:20:10

- Anyone want to guess what Behzinga is sat at as of today? As of an hour ago. - 102. - Honestly.

1:20:16

- 102. - No, I would say- - He didn't even turn. - 93.2.

1:20:21

- Wait, you think I'm sat at 93.2? - No. 89.6. - I'm 88. I'm 88.

1:20:27

- All right. Where's the scales? [Simon laughs] I'm gonna go weigh myself. Whoever gets closest- - Okay, all right.

1:20:33

- to my weight, doesn't have to [indistinct] - Doesn't have to what? - Doesn't have to down their drink. - What? - Gunnaíson's. Jeez.

1:20:40

- If we take a picture of the staff, does that count as taking pictures of blonde girls? - Do you know who we are? - No. - Good.

1:20:46

- f*ck! Literally blonde girls don't care about us. - Right. What do we need? - Sandwich Cake.

1:20:51

- Sandwich cake. - We only have it if you order in advance. - Oh my goodness. We've- - [indistinct] slices of some.

1:20:58

- Yeah. - A slice is good. - Just, just any amount. Thank you. - Thank you so much. - It's like a mythical creature. There's fish in this cake.

1:21:05

They're not easy to get. - I know I am a heavy boy. I reckon the issue is right, when I wake up, I'm like 89.

1:21:10

But after, like, today and what we've done today, I reckon I'm at least like 92.

1:21:16

I was waiting for the, oh, we f*cking take that every day of the week, man. - That's with clothes. - Oh, that's actually fantastic, man.

1:21:21

I'm gonna eat some more bread. I'm sorted, man. Hello. Hello. - Hello. Well fat? - Yeah. Clothes on, mic on. Everything on.

1:21:28

[Sidemen laugh] - How much is the mic? - I don't know. But we take everything we can get at this point. All right.

1:21:33

- 90.2. - Okay. - 89.8.

1:21:38

- I'm 90.3. - Yes! - Oh my God! Ah, I gave you a benefit of the doubt.

1:21:44

- Which, you know what? I'll take 90, like after I've had whole day of like, I take it, I take it. I take it.

1:21:50

- Well done. - Ah, yes, please. Yeah. Why does this feel like a deal? Like, I'm like, do you have any of the mystical sandwich cake?

1:21:55

- Any of them drugs. - Gotta get that sandwich cake. - Got them drugs. - Holy sh*t, bro.

1:22:00

I don't understand what's happening here. - A sandwich. - That's a sandwich. - I'm so confused. - What is a sandwich cake?

1:22:06

- It's a [indistinct]. It's like a shrimp, [indistinct]. - Ah, we were misled.

1:22:13

We thought it was something different. - I thought it was something nice. - Can we just have one? Can we just have one please? - I'm ready to try. I ate a slug, bro.

1:22:19

I can eat a sandwich cake. - But we've just eaten some fantastic bread. What do you think our opponents are eating today?

1:22:25

[Harry grunts] In Sweden. I reckon they're eating, light, fermented fish. - What's the Swedish-

1:22:31

- There's that fish. It's like a famous fish you can't eat. Like when you open it, it flat out stinks. - Yeah. If they have to eat that, they're peppered.

1:22:37

They're done. - Tobi wouldn't do it. - He'll have to, man again. - No, you do have to do it.

1:22:45

[Harry coughs] - He's exploding bread. - Sorry. - He's expanded so much.

1:22:50

- The bread went down the wrong way. There's no way he would actually send them to a one star rated place because the food there

1:22:56

is gonna give you food poisoning. So I reckon it's just gonna be like, it'll be like a McDonald's. It'll be like a cheap something. - Or weird. Like the fish.

1:23:04

- Wait, is that an egg? - What the f*ck has Josh done? I've got this image of this really nice, like,

1:23:10

Victoria sandwich, sponge cake. - Bro. - And instead we've got- - I thought it was like ice cream cake or something.

1:23:15

- We've got a slab of fish and something. - You literally took the best bit, bro.

1:23:21

- Why is that the best bit? It's all the same. - Sweden's finest food bloggers. - It smells okay. - Cheers, guys.

1:23:26

- Cheers. - Sandwich cake. - Oh, it's not bad. - Not for me. It's okay. It's not for me.

1:23:32

- I could eat the whole thing. - Right. We've got one more chance of saying, can we go home? I don't want to go back to the aeroplane. - .

1:23:38

- The weird fish that doesn't exist, it might just not exist. - The blonde girls. So what, how much is a group? - I'd say three. I'd say three is a group.

1:23:45

- And the best thing is, like, our best day's yet to come, I reckon. Tomorrow's gonna bang. - Yeah. - Tomorrow's gonna bang.

1:23:51

- That boat day. - Yeah. - What happens if we actually don't get the boat? But we made a pot today, of course we got a boat.

1:23:56

- He would not give us like such a, like a, menial task as to make it a pot. Not saying it's bad, pottery, but like.

1:24:01

- We made a pot. - Tomorrow's gonna be huge. I can tell. - And he has been pretty bang on so far this whole day.

1:24:07

- All righty. So I am here in Stockholm, Sweden. So for once, I've gone to the bad team

1:24:14

and not the good team. I switched up, I'm trying to surprise people. Apparently, they're struggling. We're filming 'cause I've had issues with, like,

1:24:20

a lot of fans out here in Sweden because we have quite a lot of fans out here in Sweden, apparently. So that is great, but also bad at same time.

1:24:27

So hopefully for once they'll be happy to see me. But normally I go to the good team. Everyone celebrates and cheers that Josh is here.

1:24:32

I heard this time they're gonna swear at me. So we'll see. - Would you rather a cock in the mouth or in the bum? - Oh, thank you.

1:24:38

- [indistinct]. - Oh, okay. [Simon laughs] - Potatoes and [indistinct].

1:24:45

- Oh my God. How are the Greeks not just like, massive 'cause it's only carbs.

1:24:50

Like there's so many carbs here. - In the mouth, by the way. - In the mouth. Or in the bum? - Yeah, I agree.

1:24:56

- Do you not? - It's somehow less invasive but even though it's the most invasive things. But- - You know, they tend to say that a man has a G spot

1:25:04

in his bum. - It's about an inch in not f*cking 16 inches. - Who's a 16?

1:25:09

- How the f*ck are we meant to f*cking do this? This is bullsh*t. I'm actually pissed off now. f*ck off.

1:25:15

[Vik laughs] I'm sorry. I'm sorry. - Can I take a picture? - Yeah, you have to now. You told him to f*ck off.

1:25:21

- I'm fine. Real quick, real quick. I'm sorry. - Take a picture. [Tobi shrieks] - Oh! - Oh!

1:25:27

- f*ck you, Josh. You're a f*cking d*ckhead. - What do you mean? - You're actually a d*ckhead. I hate you so much.

1:25:33

- Go away. Go away. Go home. Go to Greece. - We're here trying to look for blonde women. [Vik laughs] - That's for you.

1:25:38

- Thank you very much. - Let's begin. [Simon groans] - He says let's begin like I haven't eaten f*cking 2000 calories of bread already.

1:25:45

[Ethan laughs] - Thank you. - I'm finished. Begin. Let me investigate this European medium rare.

1:25:51

Oh, I actually know what that is. - That's well cooked. That's- - See that is [indistinct] something specialised.

1:25:57

I've seen some steaks in my life. This might take the biscuit. - Thank you. Oh my God. - Where did you find these cows, man?

1:26:02

- What cows? - Oh, my god. - Oh my days. - Moo.

1:26:08

- Vik's been slewing you all day. [Sidemen laugh] - What'd he say? - This is three holidays in a row.

1:26:14

This is three holidays in a row I've been, I've in on the bad side. You coming to stay on the plane with the boys?

1:26:20

- No. [laughs] - Vik swapped rooms with JJ, Vik's room stinks. - You can cop a room in the place.

1:26:26

- Ah, sorry mate. - You came all this way and you're missing out - You took all the rooms. - On the jumbo. All the rooms, it was packed. - You took all the rooms.

1:26:31

- There's plenty of rooms. - Yeah. Take us to the blocks then, Josh. You've come all this way. - To make it a $10,000 holiday now, on this side.

1:26:37

- Oh, what? Just chuck in a few zeros? - Whoops. I've a done a mistake. - Normally I'll be [indistinct] something. Not today.

1:26:43

The meat and juices of the cow itself are just. It's the marinade. - . This might be my favourite cow.

1:26:49

- . [Sidemen giggle] - Why were you so convinced that you were in the bad zone? [indistinct]? - Bro.

1:26:54

No one gets up at four o'clock in the morning to get to the airport at 5:15 for a good day out.

1:27:00

But we do. - That's what, that's how I knew. - You reckon? - That's how I knew, man. Yeah, that's how I knew for sure. Like Josh knew when he put it on the chat,

1:27:06

he was gonna cause chaos. As soon as he dropped this and said, "Yeah. Meet at 5:15." He knew, like, we knew it's a rotter.

1:27:13

So he wouldn't let that happen if we weren't on the good team. - Why hello there. Real quick. [Fans squealing]

1:27:19

Oh, you actually know who I am? [Vik and Tobi cheering] - It worked!

1:27:24

- Alright, I need to take a photo with you. [Group agreeing excitedly] - Okay, we'll take a selfie. - Vikkstar, you're better than TommyInnit,

1:27:31

I just have to say it. - Thank you.

1:27:36

- It's okay, mate. - Easy. - Alright. Here we go.

1:27:42

[JJ laughs] - All right, get in. - Go wide, bro. - We're from another town in Sweden.

1:27:49

- Okay. - And this is the bad town. - Is it a bad town? - Yeah. You have to go to Gothenberg.

1:27:55

Pewdiepie grew up there. It can't be that bad. [JJ laughs]

1:28:00

- I bet they have nice hotels there. Yeah, I'm sure they have really nice hotels there.

1:28:05

[Josh laughs] - Right. Anyway, so we are fat and finished right now. I'm actually like beyond finished right now.

1:28:12

- What have we, a lamb chop, chicken breast, steak, bread, lots of bread. - So much bread. - Salad, bread. Sweet corn. Sauce.

1:28:21

- But we are not stopping. 'Cause I tell you what, we've got a game boys. [Simon laughs] We've got a game for a big old, not any, not any.

1:28:28

What's it called? - Piña Colada. - No, not Piña Colada. It's Kon's Piña Colada. - Oh. - 'Cause we have stolen nothing.

1:28:35

- So we're gonna play a game and the loser has to have this Piña Colada. - Josh, come here. All right.

1:28:40

So we've completed our bingo card. - Whoa. - What do we get?

1:28:46

- Me? - Huh? - What? - You get me. - You are already here. - Yeah. I've just arrived. It took too long.

1:28:52

- f*ck off. That's so dead, man. - And a Sidemen debit card? Huh?

1:28:58

- We could, we could. - What? And add an extra zero? - Should we add the zero? Or two?

1:29:04

- Two? Two zeroes? - So, - So, - So, strip club?

1:29:09

- I mean, club? [Sidemen laugh] - Club, club. - We've completed our bingo. So who knows what comes next?

1:29:16

- Maybe there'll be a treat. We'll see. - Ooh. - Come on. - Meanwhile, check out the other team. - So we're gonna say a word. You gotta rhyme with it.

1:29:22

We'll go clockwise. - I got the first word. - Okay, go on it. - Ready? - Yep. - Dog.

1:29:28

- Cog. - Pog. - Fog. - Log.

1:29:34

- Tog. - Nog. - Is that a word? - Like eggnog. - Bog.

1:29:42

[Harry and Simon cheer] It's all I've got. - .

1:29:47

- Is nog a word on its own? - Oh, we eating good. We eating good in Stockholm today.

1:29:55

I don't even, salmon, rice, stuff. - Where's the meme?

1:30:00

- Your meme. Is it hot? - Hot. It's hot.

1:30:05

- It's hot. At the meme. Don't let your memes be dreams, kids.

1:30:11

Make the memes. - Mm. - Clickin'. - Tickin'.

1:30:16

- Nicking. - Okay, if we're going with 'ings, that works. - Really? - Yeah.

1:30:24

- I don't know, bro. I don't know about this. - No! No! No! [Sidemen laugh]

1:30:30

No bread! - Bread for you.

1:30:35

- Ugh! [Sidemen laugh] Go away!

1:30:41

- Oh no! - You're trying to kill me by bread. - Oh, I want the bread. Give me the bread.

1:30:48

Give the bread. Give me the bread. You ruined it by saying something with 'ing on the end. - That was the first word.

1:30:53

- All right, we're here. f*cking hell. - Have fun, guys. - It's freezing as well. - Yeah. It's very cold.

1:30:58

- Cheers to the nice dinner, Josh. We thought we'd show you how we really live. - I can't get [indistinct]. - How we really live.

1:31:04

KSI is the powerhouse of the Sidemen. That's why we keep him in the engine. - I've just deemed how small that actually is. [laughs]

1:31:11

- It is mad. - See if there's heating in there 'cause oh my goodness, it's cold.

1:31:16

- My, I've got, I pulled a good one. You're taking him back to his room. [Sidemen laugh] - Jesus.

1:31:22

Yeah. Welcome. - Where's a toilet? - I have to leave my room - To go get your teeth? - To f*cking brush my teeth.

1:31:28

- So let, okay, right. Picture this. Okay. Right. So you've had a lot of, like, water at dinner. - Yeah. Yep.

1:31:33

- 4:00 AM you wake up, right? - Yep. - You're in your boxers or naked as you do sleep, right? - Yep. Yep.

1:31:38

- How you feeling? - I literally have to put on all my clothes. [Tobi laughs] - You have a horrendous nightmare

1:31:44

in the middle of the night. - Yeah. - Wake up in a hot sweat and a panic. - What? I'm just like, ah!

1:31:50

- Oh, that was close. It's a good thing you're not six foot. - You got a good mirror here as well. You can like, sorry.

1:31:55

- Who. - Huh? - Poo. - Lou. - Ooh. - Glue.

1:32:00

- Goo. - Zoo. - Shoe. - Noose.

1:32:06

- Noose? [all laugh] Did you say noose? What the f*ck is that?

1:32:12

[Simon sings softly] [Ethan and Harry laugh] [Harry and Simon sing indistinctly]

1:32:21

♪ 7, 6, 5, 4. ♪ - There's a twist.

1:32:26

I'll give you a chance to pass on your drink to someone else - What? - if you eat three bits of bread instead.

1:32:31

[Simon laughs] - I just? - Just kidding. - Okay. - What is happening? - I dunno.

1:32:37

- That's put me over the edge. I can't put another thing in this body. - Speak of the devil. - Beef kabob. - Beef kabob.

1:32:42

- That's all right, I can't, I physically can't. - We thought JJ's room was bad. - Where's Vik gone? - He is up here.

1:32:48

- So this is where the landing gear goes. - Landing gear retracts into. - It goes into this. - We were calling it the end. Oh.

1:32:54

He's been sat here for a while. Ever, look at this. - Been expecting you, Josh. [laughs]

1:33:02

Welcome. - Very industrial. - Mind your head. - Oh, you've got a toilet! - J's toilet gang.

1:33:09

- Your bed's very sad. Wait, it's a two. - No. - What's that then?

1:33:14

- It's the dungeon. - Ah. - A dungeon in Vik's room. [laughs] [JJ laughs]

1:33:19

- Harry saw that there was space to grow. He should never have weighed himself cause it, [Simon laughs] it set him on a war path.

1:33:26

Harry realised he's got four kilos play room. [laughs]

1:33:32

Harry thought, "Yeah. I can get to 94. That's safe and sound." - It's higher than Mike's 3 kg. That's fine.

1:33:38

- Maybe that's ventilation. Maybe that's something from like, suffocating. - I think rats come down in the night. - Okay.

1:33:44

- You've got a weird, like, stain. [Sidemen laugh] - Oh no. No, no, no.

1:33:49

- I'm trying to get a past you, Vik. - What's going on?

1:33:56

- Yeah, yeah, all right. - There's a party vibe in your room. - Pre-drinks. [Sidemen laugh] - pre-drinks.

1:34:02

- Yeah, [indistinct], sh*t. - This is lit. - We're gonna get loads of girls tonight.

1:34:09

- They're gonna come here and they're gonna gush. - What? They're gonna gash. [Tobi and Josh laugh]

1:34:15

How do you mean? - Gush. - They're gonna gush? - Oh. - They're gonna gush. - No, their gush is gonna gush.

1:34:22

- Yeah. [Vik moans] - Their gush is gonna gush. - Yeah, they gush from their gush. There you go.

1:34:27

They're gonna gash. - All right. Can we just carry on? - Can I have a- - No. [Sidemen laugh]

1:34:35

- It's the unlimited bread trick. Brother, brother, brother.

1:34:41

- I'm gonna have another, I'm gonna have one. - Is anyone actually- No, don't, bug. Bug. Bug. Don't do it. - Don't do that. - Don't do it.

1:34:47

[Ethan laughs] - It's so good though. It's so good.

1:34:54

- I dunno where it's going. - . - I've tried it.

1:34:59

- You just got one pillow and it's half sized. That's all I've got. - Come, come, come.

1:35:05

I'll show you a secret that you dunno about your hotel. - Okay. - Come, come, come. Quick, run. Excitable. - Run? Oh, what, the swing?

1:35:12

The f*cking swing. Wow. - Swing! - Crazy. - Swing. - Wow.

1:35:18

- Swing! - That's good. - That is the stuff. - Okay, stop now. - What?

1:35:24

- Anyone else want to go? - That's very heavy. - You're gonna blow out. You're gonna spontaneously combust. - I've also eaten three bits of [indistinct].

1:35:30

[Sidemen laugh] - . I'm not playing.

1:35:36

- Give me 30. Give me 30. 30's fair, 30's fair. - Play for 30. Okay, 3, 2, 1. 9 - 18.

1:35:42

Oh. - Oh. Thank God. - Thank you. - Oh, this'll do. - Oh, you know what? I can do some fruit. - Is this the dessert?

1:35:48

- Yes. That's the first part. [Sidemen laugh] - No.

1:35:54

- How's there another part? - Busy as ever, Josh. - Oh, there's actually no one there. - There might be people in the rooms.

1:36:00

[soft electronic music]

1:36:07

- Welcome to my humble abode-ee. It's how we are living, bro. - Okay. It's a different in here. - Yeah, yeah. Real different, bro.

1:36:14

- Oh my. And it's warm as f*ck in here. We got the Apple TV? - Big boy TV, Apple TV.

1:36:20

- You are actually living, he's living. - Got a kettle. - We arrived here and we came in and I was like, "Oh, this ain't so bad."

1:36:26

[Sidemen laugh] Then there's my room. - That's the first room you saw, is this? - Yes. [laughs]

1:36:31

- What is this? - Wait, there's three parts. - And here we have a [indistinct].

1:36:36

It's like a [indistinct]. [Sidemen laughing] - A [indistinct]. - I'll try, I'll try the baklava.

1:36:42

- Thank you so much, Bob. I'm gonna cry. - Is this the official toilet? - Yeah.

1:36:48

Open door slowly please. - Thing of beauty. - This is a shower here. - You get a knock from JJ at 4:00 AM like, can I use your toilet?

1:36:55

- Pee room, please. - I mean, to be fair, there's two separate beds here. So if you- - Pull it apart.

1:37:02

- Highest bidder? - We're bidding to spend the night with Tobi. [Sidemen laugh] - Heyo, I bid we all just sleep here, man.

1:37:07

[Tobi giggles] Just get real cosy, innit. I'm starting to settle in, you know what I mean?

1:37:14

- Keep that bag on. - I'm starting to feel good over here. - No, seriously. I'm actually slumped,

1:37:19

so if you lot could skedaddle. - Back to the pits, the literal pits. - I'll see you guys in the morning.

1:37:25

- Piss off. - That card is officially run out. - That's full of content now. That card is packed full of content.

1:37:31

[Ethan laughs]

1:37:38

Just f*ck off. [Simon laughs] It's good.

1:37:46

- I think it smells fine. I need to pee. But it just, it's a bit...

1:37:51

[quirky pop music] [sound of pee in toilet]

1:37:57

[Vik laughing]

1:38:12

[soft clapping] - Harry. - Yep. - Have you [indistinct]. - It's time.

1:38:17

- I feel huge. - We've got our bets on. - Let's see, let's see. - Time for a shot tomorrow on the boat. - It's healthy tomorrow.

1:38:24

Thank you so much for the food, sir. - Yeah, thank you so much. - Amazing. It was fantastic. - Oh, I don't think I'll ever be fed

1:38:29

like that again. - All right, here we go. - Big boy Bug.

1:38:35

Ohh. - I've broken up my sock, by the way. [Simon and Ethan laugh]

1:38:42

- Ooh. - Oh, my god. Am I closest? - No, I said 92.3, didn't I?

1:38:47

- Yeah, two on the nose. - You did? Yeah. - Good God. Good God.

1:38:53

- Ooh. - 2.5 kilos. - Ooh. [Ethan laughs]

1:39:00

- I'm huge. [Sidemen yell] - Three kilos. - Three kilos of food.

1:39:06

- Oh my God. - Right. Unfortunately for you, I'm not staying here. - Do you wanna rock, paper, scissors me for a real hotel room?

1:39:12

- What you mean? - Let's swap. - How's that work? Swap? In your thing? Ah. - All right, can you leave now

1:39:17

and just let us suffer. - Leave where? - Just, just go. - Just walk up into distance? - Yeah. Goodbye. - See ya.

1:39:23

- Goodnight, bro. [calming piano music]

1:39:30

- Ah, I need to take a sh*t. f*ck's sake. - I like them big. I like them chunky.

1:39:36

- That's not what he asked. - Okay. Oh, there he is. - It's like cold, but it's not, it's like- [Simon laughs]

1:39:41

- He's not mic'ed up, is he? - Guys, he's doing it. He said he was doing it. - No one else get in with me now.

1:39:48

- We're in, look. - I'm technically part-way in the pool. - [indistinct].

1:39:53

- f*ck you. [Sidemen laugh] - I'm f*cking cold, man. Piss off. [Ethan laughs] - Man, get in bro, get in.

1:39:59

- . Get in, bro. Get in!

1:40:08

[Loud splash] [Simon and Ethan yelling]

1:40:14

- Okay, okay, okay. You [indistinct]. You f*cking [indistinct]. Look, it's everywhere.

1:40:19

- Oh, sorry. - Alright, well, yeah, this is happening and the only thing is I can just hear the sound of the road

1:40:27

or something. It's pissing me off a little, but, [sigh].

1:40:32

Goodnight, everyone. - So I've shut my door blind, which doesn't really block out much light,

1:40:39

but I don't have curtains, so it's just, like, this is how dark my room gets. Fantastic.

1:40:45

Right. I'm off to sleep. I'll catch you guys tomorrow back in Stockholm

1:40:52

for some more fun. - Nice way to start the day. - Hello. Welcome to living lavish day two. Oh.

1:41:00

- [Voice Off Camera] [indistinct]. - I think so. Would you like me to go get- - The new get up? - [indistinct]? Not sure. - .

1:41:06

- Well, you're the first. You are the first one. - The first person to- Oh wow. - Do you think the 5:00 AM flight didn't help?

1:41:11

- Oh yeah. I think a five flight probably packed us in a little bit. My god, I've got the food on top of that. Like, that was a food coma multiplied by flight.

1:41:22

That's a lovely fat man. A big fat man in a swimming pool. - Is it finally time? - It is time. [indistinct] Vik has always bragged

1:41:31

about, not bragged about, - Sick. - His childhood about metros. Stockholm's metros.

1:41:36

So you're gonna go check it out a little bit. The station's called Stadion and another one are like the art ones. - Yeah.

1:41:42

- That's fun, and then up this way. - It's gonna blow your mind. - So you're gonna toss off?

1:41:48

- Look, no, because I'm respectful of Sweden in there. - Oh, okay. - Only because you're respectful.

1:41:54

[Sidemen laugh] - All right, down. - Here? - Yeah. - Oh, there's not one on here.

1:41:59

- Is there? Yeah, we've got one on the top. - Oh. - Oh.

1:42:04

- It's nice, isn't it? Like, compare this to the London underground. Talk me through the experience. - I mean, I can breathe.

1:42:10

[Sidemen laugh] - That's one. - Yeah. Yeah. That's quite nice. - Hello. Good morning.

1:42:15

I am ready for breakfast. I had a lovely sleep. I slept for ages. Yeah, yesterday was bit [coughs], yesterday was a fever dream.

1:42:22

- Yeah. - That didn't really happen. - I had the biggest sh*t. - Oh, let me weigh myself. Sorry. I'll be back.

1:42:27

Oh God. Oh god. That's not good. That's not good at all. I should not be waking up that way. It's not looking good.

1:42:33

- Why? - It's 91. - 91? - This is not what you wanna wake up at. - What are you waiting for? - Avocado toast but I dunno how big it's gonna be.

1:42:38

Otherwise I would be, this looks delicious. I really wanna eat it. But should I eat both? - You are on holiday, man. And to be fair,

1:42:45

like, we're gonna have a healthy week when we're back. Right? - Whoa. - Different. - The rainbow. Whoa. Double rainbow all the way.

1:42:55

[JJ laughs] [upbeat electronic music]

1:43:00

[Sidemen laugh] - Gangster.

1:43:06

- That was so awkward. - Gangster. - Came to get a train. Yo, this sh*t's insane. - Oh.

1:43:12

- About to cause some pain. - Oh. - Wishing I was in Spain. - Oh.

1:43:19

- But Sweden is also nice. [laughs] - Go to Greece? - [indistinct]. - Yes. Thank you.

1:43:24

- Wowee. - And sir, I believe I found something for you. - Wow, thank you very much. - Wowee.

1:43:30

- Wow. Okay. - Thank you very much. - This is our fate for the rest of our trip.

1:43:35

- I can see the first two lines, the first two lines. I can see the first two lines. - Ethan could be having a son or a daughter,

1:43:41

but forget all of that. Today involves you getting out on the water. [Sidemen cheer] - I was worried for a second. I was worried for a second.

1:43:47

I was worried for a second. - I like that he, he threw, he threw it it up. He threw it up. Yeah. Out on the water, he says.

1:43:54

Does that mean a jet ski? - Get me in that f*cking bay. - I'll be eating that in one bite. - I'll do you to ten.

1:43:59

- Alright. 3, 2, 1, 3. - 4. Agh! - Oh my god, it come. - That's why you do it in one bite. Oh no.

1:44:06

- I was trying to save you. [Harry gags] - Come come. - That was so disgusting. That's a dad, you know.

1:44:14

- Yeah. Man. - Huzzah.

1:44:19

- Ugh. [Sidemen chuckle] Why. - KSI's having the best time out of this assignment right now.

1:44:24

Alright. Here we are. The big T-Centralen. - . - This doesn't look like a train station.

1:44:30

It's like something out of Star Wars. - Need more of this in the UK, no? This makes every Tuesday a little bit better. - Yeah.

1:44:36

- It definitely does. There's hella space here, bro. You can breathe. London's just crammed. Like, claustrophobic. - Because underneath London it's just mud.

1:44:43

Whereas they actually have rock here. - I reckon that's Josh on that jet ski right there. - Nah, he wouldn't be [indistinct]. - If Josh pulls up on a jet ski,

1:44:48

I'll be like fair play. - He comes walking out of the shower. [Sidemen laugh]

1:44:55

- Did you get that? - Yeah, I hope he got that. - Did you get it? I know he is here. God, I know he is here.

1:45:01

Look at the water sports stuff. Jet ski is gonna be a water sport there. - I've just hit terminal five for the toilet. Where is it?

1:45:07

- What do you mean, where is it? We just came from the- Ethan, we got a note. - Oh, I do really need a poo, guys.

1:45:13

- You ready? - Yeah. Yeah. - I'll take my time. Okay. I'm gonna read it. - Okay. - First line. I've run out of things. - Yeah.

1:45:19

- That rhyme. - Okay. - Your flights is in a few hours, - Yeah. - So go and enjoy some free time.

1:45:25

- Oh. - Oh. - Oh. Was we meant to have that there? - I'm not gonna lie, I feel like these have stunk a little bit.

1:45:30

- where are you? - Now we're gonna go [indistinct] JJ, I think. - Anyway, here anyway.

1:45:37

- I'm just trying to get past, bro. - He's breaking a silent process. - I want to, bro. - .

1:45:42

[Sidemen laugh] - I'm just trying to get, I'm just trying to get past, bro. - What did the guy say?

1:45:48

- I kicked him. - Oh, who kicked him? - You. - Did I? - .

1:45:53

- I'm gonna fight you, bro. You about to die, man. You about to die in Sweden, sh*t, bro. [energetic electronic music]

1:46:02

- I want Zerkaa, man. I thought he was here. - Call him. - I'll FaceTime him. I'll FaceTime him.

1:46:09

Giving a bell. - Because none of them would answer last night. None of them. - I feel like I've lost my father, man.

1:46:14

It's horrible. Where's he gone? It looks like a Josh-less trip for the boys. That's all right. We don't need him. - No.

1:46:20

- We don't need him. He's paying for my phone though. I've did that for the content, I'm actually worried I broke my phone now. - Can I make a photo with you?

1:46:26

- Let's all get in. - Left out? - I didn't wanna be brought in, to be honest.

1:46:31

- You want to try four people? - No, it's just you two. - Oh. We're gonna get real cosy. Real cosy, Vik.

1:46:37

- Pay for it on Tobi's card. [Vik and JJ laugh] Killed it. Killed it.

1:46:42

- Goedendag. Wait, that's the sweetest word. Goedendag. - [Voice Off Camera] No, that's German.

1:46:47

- Ah, sh*t. How do you say hello in Swedish? - Look at the boys. - [indistinct] just drive straight into the concrete there. I can see it happen. In the go-kart.

1:46:54

[clearing throat noise] Go-karting into the pits. - See ya, boys!

1:47:02

- Yes. Thank you. - Woo. It's chilly. - Ha ha ha!

1:47:07

Now it's the 1, 2, 3. Behzinga in the Greek sea.

1:47:13

Mate, look at the place we're at. This is nothing. - Gang sh*t. Yeah, man's got energy now. Man's back. Man's back in Sweden.

1:47:20

- About 30 minutes. - Dunno. Let's go. What's up? What you saying? n*gga. - Oh God.

1:47:25

- What the f*ck, bro? Our audience is like worldwide, brother. - What you saying, N-word? - I'm saying you're- Okay, nevermind. [chuckles]

1:47:33

- Swedish ends. I didn't know Sweden had ends. - . - Sweden, we are here.

1:47:39

[JJ inhales and sighs] - Pizza Hut. - Feels so good.

1:47:44

I might have to do a little griddy on them. [JJ laughs] Griddy griddy.

1:47:56

- Whoa. Well almighty. All right, now we're off. Donnie's throttling me right now. Like I'm holding it down as hard as I can.

1:48:02

Me and Bug are going so slow. Wee! I don't, oh f*cking hell. I don't think they turned the right mode on.

1:48:09

[laughs] Me and Bug are going so slow. So slow. Oh, now we got the juice, baby. Yeah.

1:48:17

[upbeat pop music] Yeah. Yeah, baby. Woo!

1:48:25

There we go. Now we're cooking. Now we're cooking. Behzinga's in the kitchen! Yeah!

1:48:34

- griddy [indistinct]. - Yeah, let's do it. Let's do it. 3, 2, 1. Griddy.

1:48:40

[Sidemen laughing] - What is the point? What is the point?

1:48:47

- I started dribbling halfway for some reason. - So obviously in Sweden there's a very famous group.

1:48:53

- ABBA. - Yeah. My favourite. - You make music like them, you dress up like them. - Do I?

1:48:58

- You can. - I'd dress up like ABBA, that'd be sick. - That's where we're going. - Yeah, baby. Woo! Ha ha ha!

1:49:11

- Alright. - Jump. Oh! [laughs]

1:49:17

- Jeez. - Hello. - Hello. - Go to the yellow buoy. - Is that where you went?

1:49:23

- Yeah. - Bro, they've got limiter so it doesn't go. - Reverse and reverse it, bro. - Bro. - Reverse it.

1:49:28

- There we go. - There he is. I think you got the drift now. - Yeah! - Look at these donuts, baby. Yeah.

1:49:36

[upbeat pop music] - I just wanna dress up like Sidemen. Anyone checking this out? Yo? Anyone see this?

1:49:43

- Where's mine? - Yeah, I'm just saying. - Exclusives. - Exclusives and it's nice. It's comfortable. Yeah.

1:49:49

You ain't going get this anytime soon. - Hopefully. - Get mad. Ha ha. Take the L.

1:49:57

- I need that. - Minter's got the juice. He's flying. He's absolutely- yes! So am I! Here we go!

1:50:04

It's Behzinga in the [indistinct]! - Yeah!

1:50:09

♪ My music's so loud, swaying ♪ - Oh, my nuts! ♪ Patrolling and tryna catch me riding dirty ♪ - Oh, my nuts!

1:50:16

♪ Tryna catch me riding dirty ♪ - Why don't we do a Vik and just walk, bro? [Tobi laughs] Let's just walk.

1:50:21

Let's just walk there. - Also, walking makes the day go quicker.

1:50:26

- [Voice Off Camera] No, it doesn't. [Sidemen laugh] - That is incredible.

1:50:31

- That's amazing. - Incredible. [JJ laughs loudly]

1:50:37

- That came from the heart as well. She was like, no, what are you on about, shut up. - Yeah, yeah.

1:50:42

- Yeah, yeah. - I went over a little bit of a wave and landed on my balls. - Here we go. The last razz.

1:50:48

[upbeat pop music]

1:50:54

Oh man. That's so fun. That is so fun. - All right, Vik, what's happening? - So we're off to the ABBA Museum. And as we discovered

1:51:01

yesterday, lots of people are just following us there.

1:51:07

- This man is to blame. - No, no. It's all of us. It's actually all of us. - I'll share the blame with him. I said we should walk.

1:51:12

It's a lovely day. - This just looks beautiful, man. - Look at this. - Bro.

1:51:17

Duck. Vik, a duck. - There's a duck. - Oh God. Here he goes again. - Hello. Duck. ♪ Something sometimes, sometimes Waterloo ♪

1:51:25

♪ Yo. Yo. Up in Waterloo ♪ ♪ Gonna get wet like Waterloo ♪

1:51:31

♪ Gonna get hot up in the loo ♪ ♪ Mighta [indistinct] or Cindy Lou ♪ ♪ I'm gonna get stepped on, stampy shoe ♪

1:51:37

- Cheers! [Sidemen laugh] We are out here at the ABBA museum, you know, Dancing Queen and that. Waterloo and that.

1:51:43

What else they got? - Dancing Queen. - Mamma Mia. No Italiano. - Dancing Queen. - Oh. How do your feet not burn?

1:51:49

- They do. [Simon laughs] - We've got kayaks next. We've got three of them. Three bad boys. This would just be a nice, nice moment,

1:51:55

you know. - Oh yes. Now, thank you very much. Oh, it's warm. - Off he goes. - [indistinct].

1:52:00

- We are living. - Bilbao Bug. - Oh, it is hot. It is steamy.

1:52:06

I'm storming. - He's got a rhythm going. - I like the look of that, like, cave system over there. You see? - The cave bit?

1:52:11

- Down there. - Yeah. - Can't believe we spent nearly 200 quid on ABBA. - Yeah. Alright, JJ, man, it says "Walk in, dance out."

1:52:17

So you gotta hit the griddy when you leave. - Of course. - You're a [beep]. You are such a dick.

1:52:24

- Alright, we're motoring, boys, we're off. Oh, hang on a minute. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

1:52:30

- Oh, the boat. Oh, God. - No, no, no, no, no. He's going over it. - I'm going for it. I'm going for it. Wee!

1:52:36

- Wow. - Wow. - . - He's on [indistinct] mode. Just a couple of boys on a kayak.

1:52:43

- Come on in. - These are such a scam. Talk to me. - Talk to me, you slut. - Oh dear.

1:52:50

- Oh. - If he was in his music. - This would amazing. - It'd be cold, like.

1:52:55

- Yeah, Josh, if you were a fan of ABBA. - If it was something I cared about. Yeah. Yeah. - Sorry. It's spot on that you've brought us here.

1:53:01

- Yeah. Well luckily, you are on the bad team, not the good team. It's not about good experiences, is it? Sometimes.

1:53:06

- Oh wow. - Oh, thanks. - You're trying to give us a bad experience. - Culture. - What do you reckon they're doing right now, by the way? - I reckon they are in, well what are they gonna do

1:53:13

in Sweden? Maybe they're doing like a, some, like, ritual or something. Like a midsummer. - Yeah, maybe.

1:53:19

- Yeah. Yeah, yeah. They might be burning someone. - Burning someone. - They got Vik sat in a- ah! [Simon laughs]

1:53:26

That wasn't very nice, Simon. That wasn't very friendly of you. - Going over the wave. - Yes.

1:53:32

[Sidemen yell] - Oh heavens, oh heavens, oh heavens. [Sidemen scream]

1:53:39

- Should we [indistinct]? ♪ Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine ♪

1:53:47

♪ Oh yeah ♪ ♪ You can dance, you can jive ♪

1:53:55

♪ Having the time of your life ♪ - Yes. Here we go. - Oh, no. - Here we go.

1:54:01

[Ethan yells] Catch it. - f*ck! Agh! Ahh!

1:54:07

- Ride the wave boys, ride the waves. - Stop it. - We came all this way- - Just to give ABBA the f*cking hundred plus.

1:54:13

- Oh, my. Oh no. - Tobi, that's you. - Oh no. Oh no. I hate it.

1:54:19

- Oh my god. - Align your face, bro. - Oh, you're looking kind of...

1:54:25

Oh, you look like Eurovision. Don't he look like Sam Ryder? - I'm not having fun. I'm not having fun.

1:54:33

- Oh no. Catch it. Oh no.

1:54:39

Whoa, f*ck. [Ethan laughs] - Just let me f*cking kayak, man. - Ice cream or something nice and cold.

1:54:44

- They must have a place in here we can get something. I scream for ice cream. And I'll make these boys cream for some ice cream.

1:54:51

I got that milf money. - When it's sunny, I just go and stand in the sun like this. I just, I collect its energy. It's good for you.

1:54:58

Sunlight is good for you. - Is there a gap on the left? - Is there a gap? Oh, I've dunno if you could fit through it, but I could try.

1:55:03

- Is he trying to get through it? - I don't think it's deep enough for you. - No, I can't get through there. - I think you should try.

1:55:11

- What's the worst that could happen? You get stuck. [Sidemen laugh] - I'll beach myself. I suspect that I'll beach myself.

1:55:17

- We gotta go all the way back there now. - It does look far actually, doesn't it? Why don't we go along the coast or something? I don't know.

1:55:22

- All righty. You finished a museum, which you had a great time with, right? - Oh yeah. - Which you didn't get to see too much of it,

1:55:28

because they said you can't film. However, in front of you, there's a theme park and as you can see, it looks a bit empty and derelict

1:55:34

because as every time we film, the theme parks are f*cking closed. However. - However.

1:55:39

- Ooh. - Made some phone calls. - Ooh. - Ooh. - And they're gonna open up for us for an hour and a half. - Ooh.

1:55:44

- The whole thing? - Josh the theme park king. - So we have- - This man runs the theme parks. - So you're on a bad team, but you now have got Grona Lund,

1:55:51

the theme park here, for next two hours to yourself. No one else. - Yay.

1:55:56

- Woo! - No zombies behind you. No one. Just all to yourself. - About time, bro. - Push me along, swine.

1:56:03

- Ah! Ah! This is Sparta!

1:56:14

- Oh, f*ck. The donnies in the Olympics must be so fit. - Yeah. - Ridiculous.

1:56:19

- Oh wow. - Oh wow. Why is it closed, Josh? - Not in season. - Ah. So we're early access.

1:56:24

- I mean, it seems pretty warm for- - Let's start going to Port Park in February. - [Voice Off Camera] Just take whatever you want.

1:56:29

- Oh. JJ, you're screwed. - What? - Oh, f*ck. - Oh, no. - This could be an L. - No, no, that's not the same.

1:56:35

That isn't the same popcorn that you were eating on the way here. - That's not the healthy popcorn.

1:56:40

- Just because you have the healthy popcorn in your- - No, no, this isn't for me. This is for... - Me, yeah, thank you.

1:56:47

- You f*cker. - Move. I can't turn. - Nice.

1:56:53

- We're almost home. - What a relaxing, lovely experience, man. - That was nice. Even though they're not doing anything nice,

1:56:58

I hope they're having fun. - A piece. - Is it licorice? - Ah, I hate it. - It's salty licorice.

1:57:04

- Swedish flavours [indistinct]. - Ready? - Really? - . - Ooh.

1:57:10

[JJ gags] [Tobi gags]

1:57:16

- Why? - Nah, man. - Why? - Why would you do that? Why would you do that to yourself?

1:57:22

- I'm sorry. So let's play some game. I think we're good to go. - Okay. - Okay. - I think he'll make it up. He just won't stay up.

1:57:28

- Oh hell. Okay. - He's turning. He's turning. - He went, "Oh hell. Okay."

1:57:34

I don't know how you don't just go around in a circle. - It's all about where you put your weight, right? - Yeah. But like this part.

1:57:39

He's not, like, look where his weight is. He is a whale. He's a whale.

1:57:45

[Ethan laughs] - Go on. Go, bug! [laughs]

1:57:52

- He's about to sink slowly. - His chin's on the ball. - Kentucky Derby, woo! - Woo!

1:57:58

- This is what we did- - You have to [indistinct]. - Are you guys ready? - [indistinct] line. [indistinct] line.

1:58:04

- Here we go. Here we go. Winner neck slaps the loser. - All right. - All right, there we go. Cool cool cool.

1:58:10

- [indistinct] [Shrill bell rings] [loud thumping] - [indistinct] the ball. [indistinct] the ball.

1:58:17

[indistinct] the ball. - game.

1:58:25

- No! - Yes! Come on, Snow!

1:58:30

- Come on, [indistinct]. - I need to rest. - I got rid of my extra ball 'cause I felt bad.

1:58:37

[shrill bell rings] - Whoa! - Wait, what? - Whoa. - Wait, what the f*ck? - .

1:58:44

- Yes, bug. - He keeps letting go of the speed. Okay. - Ah.

1:58:50

- Ah. - Ah. - Look at him go. Oh, he's happy, he's happy. Oh no. Oh.

1:58:55

- Okay. Okay. - Go on. Go on.

1:59:01

Go on. [Simon and Ethan cheer]

1:59:06

- Yeah. So now I'm playing for your Pringles. - All right. - Yeah. - I'm out. 'Cause I did cheat. - Yeah.

1:59:12

[Sidemen laugh] [shrill bell rings] [loud thumping] Oh, missed. Further away. Come on!

1:59:22

- back to back race! - I missed, I missed.

1:59:29

- Yes. Let's go. - Yes.

1:59:36

[shrill bell rings] - No! - No! - Come on! - He won again. He won again. - How?

1:59:41

- He keeps his Pringles. He keeps his Pringles. - I wanna play one more time. [Josh laughs] I got the red three times.

1:59:47

[Vik cheers] Triple up. - The Pringles are still on the line,

1:59:53

but I'm keeping the unicorn. - Aw, what? - The unicorn's elite. - Yes. [claps] - Look, now he's turned.

1:59:59

Now he's, aye! Go on! I dunno if he, I dunno if he's meaning to always turn right.

2:00:06

- I bet it doesn't look like I'm going fast, but it feels like I'm going fast. Woo! Oh no, waves.

2:00:12

f*ck, f*ck, f*ck, f*ck. - Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, he fell.

2:00:18

- You guys ready? - Last one. Last one. [shrill bell rings] [loud thumping] - Come on.

2:00:24

- Go, honey, go, honey, go. - Yes. - No! I started off well.

2:00:31

- JJ's winning. JJ'll win. - I'm trying! Get in the hole!

2:00:37

- Yes! - How? - Stop. [indistinct].

2:00:42

- I just smashed it. - How? - New world record.

2:00:47

- There's no way. - What did you do? - Where's my gift? - How did you do that? - Where's my gift? - No gift. No gift. No gift.

2:00:53

- Get a Pringles. - Give me a disabled unicorn. Yay! - Unicorn. - Disabled unicorn.

2:00:59

I mean, look at his legs, bruv. - Is that a pint I see? - That is a pint. - Lovely.

2:01:05

- You get back to land and this is all we got. - It didn't look fast, did it? - When you was out there and you first got it,

2:01:10

you was quick. - Yeah. - And then that one you razzled it. Well done. Fair dude. - Thank you, mate. - Did you mean to always turn right?

2:01:16

- No. [Simon and Ethan laugh] - Oh my God. You teleported. - Are you guys ready to play? - How did you get here so quickly?

2:01:23

- Are you guys ready? - I think so. - Yep. - Let's go ahead and start then. [shrill siren] - Let's go.

2:01:29

[thumping and beeping noises] - Harry weighs a little bit more now, don't he?

2:01:35

- Actually, there's bird sh*t on that one, I'll go over here. - Oh great. - On that one, bro. - Thank you, my friend.

2:01:42

I love that for you. My favourite. - A bit of crusty poo. [Sidemen laugh]

2:01:47

I'm a little bit worried about this. - I am a little bit worried. - These little fish, though, I want to take one home. [loud thumping and laughing]

2:01:55

- Stop. We have a winner. [Sidemen cheer] - , bro. Me and Tobi are fast,

2:02:01

you two are slow. - Yeah! Oh! - YouTuber? - What? Yeah.

2:02:08

Hey, we stay drippy. - That's drip. - ? That's drip, bro. Sheesh.

2:02:13

- Thank you. - Look at you shining. - Definitely not jealous. - Oh. - What is that? - A hanging challenge.

2:02:19

- Hang time. - Oh, this is good. This is good. - This is what I'm talking about. - This is good.

2:02:24

- I'm holding on so tight. - I'm gripping. Here we go.

2:02:29

Holding on. I'm holding on. [Sidemen giggle] - Hew hew hew.

2:02:35

[Ethan laughs] - Oh, it's quite relaxing, this. [Sidemen screaming]

2:02:51

[indistinct]. [Sidemen screaming]

2:03:03

- He's already going. - Oh, that looks ropes. - Three, four. - They've started anyway.

2:03:09

- Yeah. I know, I know, I know. - I hate it already. [soft pop music]

2:03:16

- They're going, they're going, they're going. - Hold, hold, hold. You got it. Hold. Focus end mode. Close your eyes. [Vik exhales]

2:03:21

- Nice. - Oh, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. [Tobi exhales]

2:03:27

[Sidemen applaud] [indistinct]. - What was that? 83 and 78.

2:03:33

- Oh, here we go. - Here we go. [Sidemen screaming]

2:03:45

- Come on, sir. Teach us a lesson. Come on, Big Mike. Big Mike. - Big Mike. Big Mike

2:03:52

- Big Mike's ready to [indistinct]. Don't do it to us, Mike!

2:03:57

- Yes, Mike! - Yes, Mike! - Crank it up, my friend.

2:04:02

[Sidemen screaming]

2:04:07

- Oh, f*ck. - 10 more seconds. - Like the minute. 10 more. - 10 more. 10 more. 10 more. 10 more. 10 more.

2:04:13

Come on. Come on, come on. Hold on, hold on. 5, 4, 3.

2:04:19

- Ah! - 2, 1. [Sidemen yell]

2:04:24

- Oh, f*ck off. - No! Oh! - A small prize. - Chocolate.

2:04:29

- Two kilos. - Two kilogrammes. - f*cking hell, it's half my weight. - What a day. What a day.

2:04:36

Bad team who? Never heard of it. - Take a picture with me. - Show the winners. [Sidemen laugh]

2:04:42

- What do I do, then? - Mike has destroyed me. Oh, here I come.

2:04:47

Oh my God, Mike. - Mike! - Mike! [Sidemen scream]

2:04:57

- Oh, sh*t! [Simon and Ethan laughing]

2:05:05

- Oh my god. Bug went flying. - f*ck. You been flying? - I got landed on.

2:05:11

[indistinct]. - He's having a wee. - He's pissing.

2:05:18

- That man is busy. - I know. - Here comes Tob-shizzle. - Do your practise. [metallic smack]

2:05:23

- Brother. What? - That's cute. - Oh my [indistinct]. - 25. - That was 25? - I didn't put any power in it, though.

2:05:28

- You are actually dead, bro. [metallic smack] - Okay. - Oh, weak. - Oh no. It's says 407.

2:05:34

It's 407. Here we go. [metallic smack] Yeah. - Wow. - 568.

2:05:39

- 568. - Nice one. - f*cking hell. Oh no. Get off of me.

2:05:45

- He's the [indistinct]. - Get off of me. - He's the [indistinct]. - No! Oh, please God.

2:05:51

Get me back on land please. [stutters]

2:05:56

Oh boys. For holiday, boys. - That was fun. - Do you want to ride some more? - No, no.

2:06:02

- No, we're good. - That's alright. Thank you. - That'll do. Yeah. Have we had enough railing, Mike? Mike's just had his way with me.

2:06:08

- All right, JJ, you talk a big game. - Lemme show you how it's done. - I think he's got a thousand in him. - Yo, I think- - No, I think he hits 800.

2:06:14

[metallic smack] - Whoa, [indistinct]. - Straight away, 670. Straight away. - Look at the technique.

2:06:20

[metallic smack] - [indistinct]. - defence. [metallic smack]

2:06:25

[Sidemen yelling] - Oh, a 796. - This is literally all the boxing training now.

2:06:31

- Oh, shut up. - I took a tumble. I took a tumble.

2:06:37

- Oh, Mike's lover is a lucky person. He's very rigorous. - So he had a really-

2:06:42

- Just try, do what's natural to you. [metallic smack] [upbeat pop music stops abruptly] [Sidemen laughing]

2:06:48

244. [metallic smack] - If you miss the centre of the thing, - 211. 211.

2:06:54

- you don't get anything. - V, you got one more go, bro. - Ah! - I ain't gonna laugh 'cause I still gotta go.

2:06:59

- Just hang on, looking good, bro. [metallic smack] - Here we go. Yeah, that's good. - I keep missing. - Yeah.

2:07:05

- That was a little better. [Sidemen laugh] - It's not for me. It's not for me.

2:07:10

- Harry wakeboarding. There was only one man for the job. - Well, no one else wanted to do it. So I was like, you know what, I'll try my best.

2:07:15

- Alright. Here he is. - Harry's about to go. - He is. Do you know what? He's gonna smash it 'cause-

2:07:21

- He has done this before. - He wakeboards often as well. Like, it's often. During the summer. He wakeboards often. - I feel like he might be too confident now

2:07:27

'cause this is like his thing, you know? And we have built him up. - Nah, look. It's too easy for him.

2:07:32

Ugh. - He's one-handed. Yeah. - Ugh. [cheery pop music] Look at him, swerving in the, ahh.

2:07:38

- No, he's techy. - Ah. - He is very techy. - Oh, look at him. He's doing the squat, mate. He's still up.

2:07:44

He's razzing it. - Yeah. Harry's like, just designed to do weird sports.

2:07:51

- Yeah. Woo. Yeah. Table tennis is like- - Yeah. Like I feel like he doesn't do, you know, football. - Nah.

2:07:57

- Rugby, all of those. - He does the out of the box sports. - Yeah. - So I've gotta beat 796, which ain't gonna happen. - 796. - That's really difficult.

2:08:02

- . - Put power in it. - I'm trying to [indistinct], basically. [metallic smack] Ah! I hit the bucket.

2:08:07

- Bro. You have to bring it back. [metallic smack] - Are you here? - Now, hit the actual thing.

2:08:12

[Sidemen laugh] - It's not as easy as it looks. [metallic smack] - f*ck it, bro. - It's not easy. It's not easy to be accurate.

2:08:19

I dunno how you guys did it. [metallic smack] - There we go. - Ay! Reached number one. - Reached number one. Come on. - Now just double that.

2:08:25

[JJ and Tobi laugh] [metallic smack] - Ah! - Now recalibrate your brain so you hit to the left.

2:08:31

[metallic smack] - Oh! - I can only hit the side of it. - . [laughs]

2:08:37

- Congratulations, mate. - Thanks, guys. [Sidemen laugh] Appreciate it, appreciate it, thank you very much. - Not fair. You practised right here [indistinct].

2:08:44

- Oh, oh, oh! - Okay. Here we go. Here we go. - Oh! Oh!

2:08:51

- Ah, no. Sorry. - Oh. He fell off there. - Feet knackered. It's a lot of tension.

2:08:58

- I was gonna say, he didn't fall. - I'm f*cking knackered. I'm f*cking knackered.

2:09:03

I'm so f*cking knackered. It takes it out of you, this, man. [wind blowing]

2:09:12

Ugh! - There we go. Big boy Steve. [metallic smack]

2:09:17

Was that it? - That's it. [metallic smack] [Sidemen cheering]

2:09:23

- There it is. - There it is. - As soon as he hits it, you're done. As soon as he hits it, you're done, JJ.

2:09:29

- . - All he's gotta do, J, is hit and you're f*cked. [metallic smack]

2:09:34

- Oh! - Oh, that was good, bro. Bring it round the side. [metallic smack] - Oh! Oh!

2:09:41

- 896! - High score! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! - .

2:09:47

[Steve laughs] [metallic smack] - Holy sh*t. - 866, unlucky.

2:09:53

- Come on, Steve! - I want to see it hit the top. - Power. - Call it a day. [metallic smack] [Sidemen cheer]

2:10:02

- Steve wins. Shock. - It's a shock horror. [JJ laughs] - Oh, lads.

2:10:08

- I can't believe it's so early in the day, we got a whole day left. - 2:30, lads. Do you know where we're off to now? Do you want me to tell you? - Go on.

2:10:13

- We're off to our cabana that we have all day. - No, you gotta turn it into a run. ♪ Ah, we going to the cabana ♪ - Yeah.

2:10:18

- Yeah. ♪ We're all looking dapper. ♪ - Yeah. ♪ Yeah, we got a pool. ♪ - Yeah. ♪ The bad team of fools ♪ - Oh.

2:10:24

- Ooh. ♪ You don't want to smoke. ♪ ♪ This ain't no joke. ♪ - Oh. - Okay. ♪ We are the good Sidemen. ♪

2:10:29

- Yeah. - That's right. - Cheers to that. - Cheers. Cheers. - f*cking cheers to that, boys. - Cheers, cheers. [Sidemen laugh]

2:10:35

Oh, we got this? - Your cabana. - Oh, we got a cabana. - Thank you, brother. - We don't deserve this, you know. - I do.

2:10:41

[Ethan laughs] - Money straight away. Money straight away. Money straight away. Come on. - Oh god.

2:10:46

- Oh, Lord. - I'm trying to work out the hoop, the- - Oh! [upbeat electronic music]

2:10:52

[Sidemen and employees cheer] - Give him the prize. - Money. - .

2:10:59

- First to two. - But I got one yet. What do you mean? - Exactly. - f*ck. [Sidemen chuckle]

2:11:07

- Aw, he got two. - Oh! - Oh no. [indistinct].

2:11:12

- It's a double ball. It's a double. [electronic music intensifying] [Sidemen yelling]

2:11:17

[Sidemen yelling] [Sidemen cheering] [music intensifies]

2:11:23

- What? - No, I don't wanna slap you. - You can slap me. [slap on skin] That's quite nice.

2:11:29

[slap on skin] He does it quite, like, softly. [Sidemen laugh]

2:11:37

- Whenever you're ready. - We're ready. - Yes, please. - Would you like the lifts or on the stairs? - We'll take the stairs. - We're a couple fit young gentlemen.

2:11:43

I'm f*cking huge, man. - Imagine it's Josh giving the massage. - Imagine. - I'd be so lucky.

2:11:49

- This one's beautiful. - This one. There's a guy there. Here, I got this on. Oh, this space is so nice, I'm coming back. - This is great. - This is actually really nice.

2:11:55

- Hey, yo, Calfreezy? [Josh exhales] Like bro, oh snap, I'm literally like, holy sh*t.

2:12:03

That's jokes. - This doesn't feel safe. [chains rattling] Ah.

2:12:08

- Woo! This place is actually beautiful, by the way. - This is the best, worst holiday ever. [Tobi and Vik laugh] Oh, sh*t! Ah!

2:12:14

- Oh God. - Ah! - . [Sidemen screaming]

2:12:19

- Oh, yes. Oh, these are the pink stones that women used to rub their faces with. - So these are actually warm Himalayan salts.

2:12:25

- Oh. - Oh. - They do not use them to rub their faces. - I have seen that, though. - Those are different crystals. - Oh, [indistinct].

2:12:31

- These ones will melt underwater 'cause they're actually made from salt. - Oh. - Oh. - Ooh.

2:12:37

Oh, I'm sorry. I've got ugly feet. - We're getting the full experience here. - Oh. Oh, they're very warm. Oh.

2:12:42

- Too warm? Do you need a towel? - Oh, oh, oh. - You can feel it, you can feel it. - Oh, they're very warm.

2:12:48

- Now, Simon, [indistinct]. - I have very sensitive feet, Harry. - Feel like I've got cankles. - You do.

2:12:53

[Sidemen yelling] - Oh my God. - Holy sh*t.

2:12:59

This is more intense than I was expecting it to be. - you missed the window. - Ah!

2:13:06

- Guys, I'm scared of [indistinct]. - No! - I'm actually done, I'm actually done.

2:13:12

- You good? [Sidemen laugh] - They say, "we'll put you on the nice slow one." - They said we're starting off slow.

2:13:18

I got attacked by this chair ahead of me the whole time. - It's been great. [chain rattling] It's been really great, Josh. I'm ready to,

2:13:24

- Yeah, I'm ready to, - No, no, no, no, no. - I'm ready to end it there, fellas. - Look. Actually, we got on that one.

2:13:31

- Yeah. - No, no, no. - I might throw up. - I will firm this. - Go on, then.

2:13:37

- I'll see the whole works. - We'll see. - I'll do the whole works. - I wanna see this. - Okay.

2:13:42

- Keep them there. - Oh, they are quite hot. [Ethan and Simon laugh] - [indistinct]. Yes, please.

2:13:47

- Oh. Oh. - Here we go. Alright, let's give it a try. - Can we not get close ups in the feet?

2:13:53

- Oh. [whistling exhales] That's fine. No, I'm fine. I'm fine. - You're a strong man, you know.

2:14:00

- Can I just watch you guys? Oh, f*cking hell. [Sidemen cheering]

2:14:07

[rollercoaster chugging] - Oh God. - Holy sh*t, look at this drop. - Oh God. [Sidemen screaming]

2:14:17

- Yeah!

2:14:24

[Sidemen screaming]

2:14:31

[JJ moaning] - It's lovely. It's nice. - Oh, that was easy.

2:14:36

- It was easy. It's nice. - Again. - It was all right. That was fun. I'm not going again. - f*ck off.

2:14:41

[bottle spraying] - There are two oil blends to choose from today.

2:14:48

Our first option is a detox mixture with lime and geranium. [indistinct].

2:14:54

- Ooh. Oh. Wake up, bro. - Leave him alone. [Sidemen laugh]

2:15:00

Deep inhale. - Oh, that's fantastic.

2:15:08

- That's some good oil. - This one is detoxifying and anti-inflammatory. - The way he says it. - Sweet orange and lavender.

2:15:16

- Oh. - You like that one? - I like that one. - Oh yes. [Sidemen laugh]

2:15:22

I've seen the light, though. - Oh, that's delicious. [Sidemen laughing] - They're having fun.

2:15:28

One? - JJ, you don't have to. - No. What do you mean? You don't need to do that.

2:15:35

- I want it on the front. - Woo!

2:15:40

[Sidemen yelling]

2:15:52

[light-hearted electronic music] - See, basically, the staff wanted to get in the front row with the boys, and me and JJ were like, "oh, you lot,

2:15:59

you have to take our seats," and look how much fun they're having. - Yeah, bro. We're just being nice people. - Yeah. Sometimes you gotta- look, see.

2:16:05

[riders shrieking happily] - Wow. Being basted like a turkey.

2:16:10

- Have your hands on your knees. [Simon chuckles]

2:16:17

- Surely you don't wanna do 30 minutes of this, lads. [Simon laughs] We've got the cabana all day, boys. It's all,

2:16:22

- This is really nice. - This is the life I deserve. I've worked hard for this. - All those pack-n-plays.

2:16:29

- So, we are going to ask you to stand and get comfortable on the tables. - Very relaxed right now.

2:16:34

It's not wide enough for my eyes to open. - Yes. I'm very comfortable. I'm a happy man.

2:16:41

Hey, bad team. [kiss noise] Wish you was here, bad team. Sike.

2:16:46

Go f*ck yourselves. [soft clarinet music]

2:16:51

[music grows louder]

2:17:01

- Ha ha! - This is easy. You just do one leg at a time. - Nah.

2:17:07

- Oh no, I'm going down. - We're going up, Josh. Ah! Oh. Whoa!

2:17:14

[Josh bounces and yells] [JJ bounces and yells]

2:17:20

[Josh laughs] - J, [indistinct]? [laughs] - Jesus Christ, my ass. Whoa, bro, whoa. Whoa. It's a rollercoaster in here.

2:17:29

[Vik laughs] Jeez. [ominous tone sounding] What the f*ck?

2:17:37

Oh, Jesus Christ. That's way harder than it looks. Oh.

2:17:43

- It really isn't. - Oh wow, Simon. How does it feel? - Oh, it's such a happy place right now.

2:17:50

- You're in a great place. My back hasn't felt this content in a long time. - Hey, Bug. - Go away.

2:17:55

- He's out. - Did he just say "go away"? [Ethan laughs] Harry, how you doing? - Shut up.

2:18:00

[Simon and Ethan laugh] - Vik, ze bugs, we must go. Go, Vik, go!

2:18:07

- On the high seas, laddy. [Sidemen yelling and laughing] I wonder how many people have stacked it really badly. Oh!

2:18:14

[Sidemen laugh] - f*cking hell. - Oh, sh*t. ♪ You spin me right round, baby, right round ♪

2:18:21

♪ Like a record, baby, right round round ♪ - Oh, f*ck! [Sidemen yell and laugh]

2:18:30

[upbeat percussive music] - Where the f*ck? - There's a shortcut. - That's if you trip too much.

2:18:36

- Oh, [indistinct] exactly. - I hate this. I hate this this much. - This is actually insane. - Shortcut.

2:18:42

- Just f*cking with my head so much. - We're not actually moving. - Why do I feel so sick? - The next time I complain about my job,

2:18:49

punch me in the head. - Offer accepted. You don't wanna be one on the side, man.

2:18:55

f*cking [indistinct]. Am I right? - Hello again. After the wakeboard, it's sorting my shoulders right out.

2:19:03

So good. - He's okay now. He's clocked it now. Oh no, it's happening, it's happening.

2:19:09

- Oh, oh, oh, oh. [Tobi laughs] - Mind your head.

2:19:16

- You're out. [Vik moans] - Bro, that's a f*ckery. - I actually have no idea what the way is, [indistinct].

2:19:21

- This- oh! - Over there. - Yeah, it's this way. - Go right. - There's so many sidemen.

2:19:27

[Tobi yells] - Oh. - f*ck! - Jesus. - We're in the high seas, laddies.

2:19:33

- I feel sick, I feel sick. - It's the Titanic team over here. - It's crazy how rollercoasters do nothing for me, but this sh*t f*cks me up.

2:19:39

[upbeat electronic music] - I feel like a new, I feel, I can't speak. - That's what the massage is done to you.

2:19:46

- I actually feel last. I feel so good. - That massage was so good. - To my core, I feel good. - So, good bro. - I feel lovely.

2:19:51

- I see coconuts. I see fat drinks. - Oh, we got our coconut. Look at Kon, bro. - Yes. - Fancy seeing you here.

2:19:57

- Oh, that was lovely. - That was so lovely. - That was quite divine. Really was. - Great. Oh, a food.

2:20:03

Oh, chicken satay. - Oh, they look good. - Chicken satay with rice. Oh my god.

2:20:08

- I've got some sushi rolls with some soy sauce, which are gonna get squirted on. And then I've also got a lobster roll

2:20:14

'cause I'm a fat bastard currently. But I feel like, when in Rome, I have what they serve. Do you want a little cinematic of my food?

2:20:20

Sike, I'm eating it. [Simon laughs] Oh my God. That's amazing.

2:20:25

[JJ and Josh scream]

2:20:31

- sh*t. Yo. [Sidemen laugh]

2:20:36

What the hell. - Nice. Should we get, Minter said to let us know?

2:20:41

- Yeah. Simon! - I bought champagne for the boys. - You got the glass as well. - Yeah, man. Only the best.

2:20:48

- Your abs are coming through, you know. - You're actually looking in shape, bro. - In the right way. - No, you're looking great. You're looking great.

2:20:54

- You were both looking great. - No, we're not. We're fat. - . - There we go.

2:20:59

- Well, I can't be double fisting. - Oh, oh. Gotta fill me up. Fill mine up right to the top.

2:21:06

No, a little bit more. All right. There you go. - Naughty mug. Oh wait. [Simon laughs] This pool is for adults. Guess what?

2:21:13

We're the best adults in the pool. Balding. - Great speech. That's a great, he's bald, by the way.

2:21:18

- He's bald. - That's sexual harassment these days. - Cheers. - Cheers. - No, he's big up. Josh Zerkaa.

2:21:23

- Yeah. Fair play. - Shout out to Josh Zerkaa. - We thought he'd show up, but he did not.

2:21:28

- I've gained a respect for Josh Zerkaa. - Same. Cheers to Josh. - Cheers. Cheers - Cheers to Athens. [burp]

2:21:34

[Sidemen laugh] - Oh, laters, nerds. - They realise-

2:21:41

- No. No. - Jesus. - Oh my, wow. - Zombies are [indistinct]. Fetch me their souls.

2:21:48

Let's go slow and then accelerate away. - Callum needs to go home. Callum needs to go home. - What is- - [Voice Off Camera] The car behind us.

2:21:54

His parents are now currently like, looking at, did you do it? Did you do it? - It's all your fault, bro. - No, it's all our fault.

2:22:00

- No, I hate him. - You're acting like I'm the only famous one. - You are KSI famous. - You guys are in the Sidemen.

2:22:06

- It's a different level of fame, though. - It's different level, bro. - It's not a different level. - Brother, listen, I love the humility.

2:22:11

But you are just- - We're all famous. - You know that legacy that you've been chasing? It's been there all along.

2:22:17

It's been there all along. - Are they all getting in another, oh my god. We got another car behind us.

2:22:23

- Bro, they're really gonna get in that car to follow us. Bro, I can't believe this. - Aww. - So, I have a last gift.

2:22:29

You will have summer [indistinct]. You need to wear this. - Oh, thank you. - Thank you.

2:22:34

- I wanted one too, man. Thank you very much. - Pleasure. - Oh yes. - They got Four Seasons. Big up.

2:22:41

This fit my head? Yeah, absolutely. That's lovely. Oh yeah. The Four Seasons. - [Voice Off Camera] Does anybody know what our flights are,

2:22:47

as well? - I think our flights, I have a sneaky suspicion that we're flying home in business class.

2:22:53

There's no way that we're getting back on a Euro for Traveller flight. - I think the fact that I'm on row seven and he's row five

2:22:59

means we are. - Oh. Well, Josh Zerkaa, I could give you a big smooch. - Do that actually, man. Oh my god.

2:23:05

[kiss noise] [Simon laughs] - [Voice Off Camera] Go on, unboxing. - What? - Did they forget that there's [indistinct]?

2:23:11

- It's a candle. - That's elite. That's elite. - Says "Summer." - That's very elite. I like that.

2:23:18

That's summer. - You know what? We'll keep this and it'll last 15 days.

2:23:23

By then, we'll have our pottery stuff. - Ah, we've had such a good time, man Look, we even got parting gifts, man.

2:23:29

- I'm actually really sad to leave. - They got my man as well, you know. Took care of us. The service in this place here, I'm not even cappin', has been so elite.

2:23:37

- Unreal. - All the places we've been lucky enough to go to, this has been top tier. The service has been [chef's kiss]. - Yeah.

2:23:42

- So big on Four Seasons for that 'cause that's- - This seems really sponsored, but it's not. - It's not. - It may cost an arm and a leg, but what a lovely place.

2:23:50

What a lovely bunch of people. They're very friendly. They're very friendly. But they charged up our ass. They charged with money. But it's okay.

2:23:56

- We out of here. Stockholm airport, home time. Finally. We've made it past a- - Bad trip. Completed it. Again.

2:24:01

[Sidemen laugh] With my boys. - it turned out pretty sick.

2:24:07

- Ended up a good trip. - I came through and saved the day. - Yeah. Honestly, it's just- - You know what, I've got some more saving the day. - You came through and gave yourself a good holiday.

2:24:13

- Hey, hey, hey, hey. I've got more saving the day for you. - Oh? - So first off, I got some sweets for the plane.

2:24:19

- Ah. - I was waiting for him to say, "I've got you a private jet." - Obviously, JJ should be very sad about Arsal's

2:24:26

recent performances. - Oh. - As we're about to go into the last game of the season.

2:24:32

So I thought I'd get you a limited edition Arsal Dairy Milk. - Oh. - Whoa.

2:24:37

[JJ laughs] - So you can just. Eat. - Eat. [laughs] Eat away my pain.

2:24:42

- You're supposed to be training. You can eat your [indistinct]. - If you enjoyed and laughed, as always, subscribe to the channel.

2:24:48

You wanna see the [indistinct]. See you next time. - Peace. - Bye.

2:24:53

- Cone flip. - You landed. - To end our trip. - You can also [indistinct]. [thump] [Sidemen cheer]

2:25:01

- All right, goodbye. - See you. This episode was fun. [funky piano music]

Transcript

0:00

- [JJ] Yoh, oh my God, no way, it's another Sidemen Tinder video. But this time, it's a YouTube edition! Oh my God, I'm so excited ahh, wait, pause the video.

0:10

Before we continue 50% of you watching aren't even subscribed to us. What are you doing? Huh?

0:16

If we don't get 10 million subscribers this year then, it's over. No more Sidemen videos, is that what you want?

0:24

Well, if it's not, then subscribe! Or else we ain't doing any more of these.

0:30

So, scroll down a little bit, and subscribe! Also the discount code is Tinder.

0:36

Also all the Instagrams of the girls are down below. Yeah, I know you're all smiling, you dirty dogs.

0:43

All right, let's go.

0:49

- Hi, I'm Becky I'm 21 and I'm from Wales. - Hi, I'm JJ, I'm 26.

0:56

And let me show you a magic trick. Do you have any money with you right now? - Obviously not. - Okay.

1:03

- Okay, luckily I always have money - Okay. - with me. All right you see that? - Yes.

1:08

- Do you guys see this? Okay, all right, okay, okay.

1:15

You see that? - I do. - Okay, all right. I'm going to reinvent and multiply this,

1:22

right in front of your eyes. - Right. - You ready? Okay, let me say the magic words, I'm rich.

1:32

(all laugh) - [Becky] You dropped some, oh.

1:37

(all laugh) - Ta da! - Oh, you know what? I mean, if I could keep that,

1:44

that is a yes. - Yes. - Judging by the fact you've just thrown money at me,

1:49

and you made my career, go on, yes.

1:55

This is good. - I think I created that from you too.

2:01

I mean it was like, flowing, like just fucking overhand.

2:06

I'm so sorry. - You're wealthy, you're wealthy, Jesus. - Hi, I'm Callum, I'm 24.

2:12

And what the, oh fuck, I fucked up already. All right.

2:18

(all jeer)

2:24

- Newbie, newbie, newbie. - Composure. - Yeah, breathe.

2:29

- Okay, hi I'm Callum, I'm 24. And if I flip a coin, what are the chances I get head?

2:37

- I mean, from the coin 50/50. Not from me though, I'm sorry.

2:43

- Hi, I'm Toby, I'm 26, and I have an obsession with wearing suits.

2:49

I'll look for any excuse. - [Becky] I love that, is that it? - That's it, that's it. - Go on then, smart boy.

2:55

(all laugh) - You are? - I'm Simon, I'm 27, and I bet I can touch your belly button,

3:01

from the inside. - Simon! - You winced when you said that.

3:06

You're like I don't wanna do this. - I got it? - It's a no, I'm sorry. - Ah!

3:12

- Talia, I love you. - I'm Vik, I'm 24, and I could teach you a thing or two about writing a good diss track,

3:18

'cause, I'll be honest, you need it. - About my dis track? Wait, that took time.

3:24

- You roasted her? - I'm not happy, go on. I'll learn one about you next.

3:31

- Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27. - Hello. - Are you Dumbledore? 'Cause you're like a headmaster?

3:38

- Oh Jesus. - Oh Josh, no.

3:44

- Frey, what do you see in him, man? (all laugh) - Oh God. - No, I'm not so. - I'm telling you. - Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23.

3:52

Damn, you look out of this world, 'cause you got a big head like an alien.

3:57

- [Becky] And your book's upside down and everything. - Oh. - Come on, get. You're excited then.

4:03

- Hi, I'm Steven but you can call me tank, because I love the taste of women.

4:09

- Oh my God, oh my God. - Sick. - [Becky] I don't get it.

4:15

- Oh, it's gonna be a long day. - What is it with this room? Why is it always in this room? Every time. - Oh shit.

4:21

- I'm not involved, I'm not involved. - I get it now. - I do not approve of that.

4:27

- Steven, - Yes. - It's a no from me, I'm so sorry. - Oh, Becky a savage. - Becky a savage.

4:33

- I'm Callem, I'm 27 and I heard that poems go down really well, so I got Harry to write me one.

4:39

- No, no, no. - This is all on you Harry. - Roses are red, JJ's penis is bigger, but let's not forget

4:48

that he is a massive public figure and that would obviously make it really hard to date him.

4:54

So, you should swipe right on me. - Nice.

5:02

- Okay, that's fine, wait. Okay, you've read that very nicely. - [Callum] Thank you. - Yeah, so it's a yes.

5:08

It's a yes. - Thank you. - That was lovey. - Yeah, welcome brother.

5:13

- Hello, sir. - Hello, I'm Ethan. I'm 24, from London. I could be your Bambino bazinga.

5:22

- Did you just take it out in the line? Go on then.

5:28

- What? Oh my God. - Yes. - Okay, I'm I done? - Let's go boys. - I'm marking myself.

5:33

- Becky, Becky, you can keep it by the way. - You're joking? - I'm chill, yeah. - No, you're not. - Yes, I'm serious, it's fine.

5:39

Stop stealing the money.

5:44

- Hi, I'm Jordan, I'm 21 and I'm from Salisbury. - Hello, I'm Callem, I'm 27

5:50

and I wanna put my VV in your Chichi. - What has happened?

5:57

What is happening? - Oh my God. - [Jordan] That's a whole lot for me. - Swipe right, sign the King. - It's only Wednesday, babes.

6:02

It's only a Wednesday. All right, sorry, sorry. - I tried. - You tried, A for effort.

6:09

- My name's Vik, I'm 24 and I can see you have good taste, so. - Thank, yeah, sure right, go, easy.

6:17

- All right. - Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23. Do you have the Corona virus 'cause I can't stopped looking at you?

6:23

(all laugh) - A for effort, that was a good one, that was a good one.

6:30

That was a good one, yeah. - Yes. - That was a good one, fair play, fair play, fair play. - Hi, I'm Stephen.

6:35

Do you get notified when I upload? 'Cause you've certainly turned my bell on. (guys laugh)

6:41

- I feel like I might have had that one before. I'm not gonna lie. - Oh. - Sorry. - From who? - Stealing jokes? - From who? I'm sorry.

6:48

Sorry, that was just a little bit too. - It's just the ears, isn't it, that's all.

6:55

- Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27. You've got boyfriend, right? - Correct. - When you're ready for a man friend,

7:00

you know where I am. - Oh, oh. - Oh, fucking hell no. - Oh my God.

7:08

- That is madness. - Jeez, jeez. - Absolutely not, go, go, go, go, go.

7:17

- Hi, I'm Toby, I'm 26 and I'm on my way to a wedding after this but I currently, have no one to go with, so.

7:26

- So, you say you've really made an effort. I love that, absolutely, absolutely.

7:33

- Hi, I'm Callum, I'm 25. How about you sit on my lap and we talk about the first thing that pops up?

7:42

- I tried to keep a straight face and I just couldn't. You did make me laugh but,

7:48

it was a bit too dad jokey for me but it's, sorry, sorry. - Dad joke? - What dad jokes are you into? - That's okay.

7:57

- Is your dad doing all these? - That was like a Google search, that was a Google search.

8:02

- I'm Ethan, I'm 24. I recently watched Joe Valentine's day Try On. I finally masturbated for the first time in six months.

8:08

- Oh my God, Jesus. - No, I was waiting for someone to say something about that. I was like, that was probably your sponsor, fair enough.

8:14

- Jesus Christ. - Please. - I mean actually, to be fair play that you did your research but,

8:23

that wasn't post for that reason, sorry. - I'm Simon, I'm 27, and we should go halves on a baby.

8:29

- Wow, straight to the point. Talk about staying straight with this. - [Simon] Yes.

8:37

- Go on, go on, go on. - Yeah. - Hi, I'm JJ, I'm 25.

8:43

And are you at shock because I've got some swimmers for you to. (guys jeer)

8:58

- Can I try again? - You can absolutely try again. You can pretend that just didn't happen right.

9:03

It's fine, it's fine. - I beat Logan Paul. (all laugh) - Go on, go on.

9:09

(all cheer)

9:18

- Hi, I'm Chi With A C. - How old are you? - 19. - Where you from? - Kent.

9:25

- [Interviewer] Kent. - Hi, I'm JJ, I'm 26.

9:34

And if you've never said the word (beep)in your life swipe right? - Oh - Yeah.

9:40

Yeah, there we go. (all laugh) nice.

9:50

- I'm Simon, I'm 27. Chi With A C, they call me Simon with a semi.

9:57

- Up? - Ey, that's a super like, that's a super like. - Super like, ey. - I'm over here now, yeah?

10:06

- Wow. - Hello? - Hello. - I'm Callem, I'm 27. Chi With A C. - Yes.

10:11

- More like, Chi with my d inside her. - Oh no. - Jesus.

10:18

- So, he gets away with it? He gets super liked. - I went up - I'm Ethan, I'm 24.

10:23

If you sleep with me, I can get your least 30,000 followers. It's not much, but it's honest work. (all laugh)

10:33

- I'm Vik, I'm 24. And if you swipe right, I'll subscribe to your YouTube channel. - Okay.

10:39

- Fuck you, man. - Really, that's 30,000, one. - Hello.

10:44

- Hi, I'm Callum, I'm 25, and I'll subscribe as well. - Oh, perfect, go on. - Okay.

10:51

I just needed one yes, bro, it's a hustle, it's a hustle. - Hi, I'm Harry. Are you from Iraq? 'Cause you need to Bag dad dad ass up.

10:59

(guys laugh) - [Harry] I tried it, I tried it. - Oh, yeah okay. - Yeah, come on.

11:09

- Yeah man, I got it. - I'm sorry. - I'll be there soon, don't worry.

11:15

Hi, I'm Steven. You can call me Virgin Wi-Fi 'cause I'll go down on you all the time, and I'm a Virgin.

11:21

- Same. - Yes, oh my God.

11:27

- Hi, I'm Toby. - Hello. - I'm 26 and I've just come back from a funeral.

11:36

- Oh, that's it? Oh, bad, wow.

11:43

- Don't make it any worse. (guys cheer)

11:50

- Hi, I'm Josh, I'm old, or I'm I?

11:59

(all jeer)

12:05

- Your age is in it? Wow. You took one subscriber, over my D. - Yeah. - Suck it up.

12:11

- How about your idea? - Yeah. - Really? - Yeah.

12:21

- I'm <PRESIDIO_ANONYMIZED_PERSON>, I'm 22 and I'm from Northamptonshire. - Hi, I'm Simon, I'm 27 and

12:27

Ali White's a bit of a weirdo, ain't he? - What? How's that of any relevance?

12:32

No, no. (all laugh) - What's going on? - [Simon] I just thought I just go

12:38

and put it into the water. - Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27.

12:44

Out of all your curves, your smile's my favourite. - Oh, that's actually really cute, yeah, go for it, why not?

12:49

- Oh. - Easy, dog. - Yeah, that's cute. - Bro. - My name's Vic, I'm 24.

12:54

We'd probably need a stepladder to make this work. So, feel free to swipe left. - I mean, it's cute, but yeah, no, sorry, not gonna work.

13:06

(Toby knocks) Hey. - I'm Toby, I'm 26 and I'm a Jehovah's witness so,

13:12

swipe right if you wanna save money at Christmas and annoy your neighbours. - I mean, I love your outfit. - Thank you.

13:17

- I like the vibe. - Would you like to accept the Lord Jesus as your saviour? (all laugh)

13:23

- I think you're a bit short, sorry. (all jeer)

13:28

- I'm Ethan, I'm 24, and now I'm six foot. - Really? I still don't think you are though, I'm sorry.

13:37

- Jesus. - Got a book? Anyone got a book? - Anyone got a book? - You got another book. - Not the Bible.

13:42

- I can't stand on the Bible, I cannot stand on the Bible. - Are you on your tiptoes? I still don't think,

13:50

oh, you got another book. - Here you go. - And now I'm six foot. - But, I'm I well allowed to wear heels when we go out

13:57

or not? That's a no, I can't do insecurity, come on, no.

14:03

- I don't want 'em. - Hi, I'm Callum, I'm 25. Are you looking for a stud?

14:09

Because I've already got the STD, all I need is you.

14:14

- Wow. - Wow, that was awful. - Okay, thank you. - But, I'm gonna say yes. - Oh, thank you so much.

14:20

- Okay, go for it. - Fantastic. - Hi, I'm JJ, I'm 26 - Hey.

14:26

- And I'm the only one that's still on a song with Trippy Red, Rick Ross and Lil Baby.

14:31

- I don't know who any of them are. (all jeer)

14:37

- No, wait, hold on, no, no, no, no. - I'm a Macfly fans. (all jeer) - No, no, how is that possible? That's impossible.

14:45

There's no way. - Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23. - Hey. - Girl, you've got more legs than a bucket of chicken.

14:53

- Bye. - Oh, okay. - Why is everyone talking about my height? I'm not that tall.

14:59

Are you gonna talk about my height? - No, definitely not. - Okay, good. - Hi, I'm Steven, I'm 24. Have you been baking biscuits?

15:05

Because you just made this ginger nut. (all laugh) - Bye, you missed me with that.

15:15

- Hello, I'm Callem. - Hi. - I'm 27 and I have some Tinder reviews I wanna read out to you. - Go for it.

15:21

- For once, I actually reached orgasm after meeting someone on Tinder, he's something special.

15:27

His tongue feels like it's six inches long, such a crazy sensation, must try. And if he was a restaurant,

15:33

I would eat there at least twice a week, nine out of 10. That's from Georgia. - Okay, aren't you meant to be

15:38

saying something nice about me? Not you. (all jeer)

15:44

- Oh jeez, damn.

15:50

- Me again. - Hey, Toby. - Back to give you a second chance. - A second chance? - Yes. - Okay, have you got another line for me

15:56

or was that kind of it? - Just get saved, just get saved really. - I'm good, thank you. - Oh, damn.

16:04

- You turned Jesus down twice. - Hi, I'm Roxy, from the channel Roxxsaurus.

16:09

I'm 23 and I'm from Oxfordshire. - Hi, I'm Vik, I'm 24 and abstain didn't kill himself.

16:17

- Oh. - All right. - I'm gonna go left. - I'm Ethan, I'm 24.

16:23

You've already got 4 million subscribers, please swipe right, I want it by the end of the year. - Okay, swipe right.

16:32

- Hi, I'm Toby and I'm actually late for a job in the view so, I'm gonna have to. - Okay, bye, good luck.

16:38

- [Toby] Thank you. - What the? Oh, he's just gone. - He's gone. - Oh, he's actually gone.

16:44

Brilliant. - Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27. You have more subscribers than me. I'm just a daddy looking for a sugar mommy.

16:54

- Honest, I love the honesty. I think I'm gonna go left though.

17:00

- Hi, I'm Callum. - Hi. - I'm 25, and I've got a flatmate that can sort you 60 quid for a gramme.

17:10

- I like your humour, so I'm gonna go right. - Thank you.

17:15

- Hi, I'm Steven, I know how to please a lady. In fact, the only youtuber that goes down more than me is AnEsonGib.

17:21

(all laugh) - Swipe left. - You do him like that, why?

17:29

- Not in Tinder. - Hi, I'm Simon, I'm 27 and I like to practise safe sex.

17:35

I could tie you to the bed, so you don't fall off. - I like your joke, so I'll go right.

17:41

- Yeah. - Pretty close. - Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 23. Is your mother a beaver, 'cause damn.

17:50

- You actually had to read that from a notebook? - Yeah. - I'm gonna say no, sorry.

17:56

- Hi, I'm JJ, I'm 26. And chicken is my second favourite thing to eat in bed.

18:02

Wanna know what my first is? Your pussy. - I'm vegan, so no.

18:09

- Man, is your pussy vegan? - Sorry.

18:15

- I'm Callum, I'm 27. This is gonna sound really weird, I'm sorry. But, I really need to have sex with you, it's the only way that will stop me from going to jail.

18:23

- No, I'm sorry. (guys laugh)

18:32

- Oh, he's back, he's back. - He's back. - How did your job interview go? - I'm Toby, I'm 26 and I've got the job.

18:38

(all cheer) - Swipe right. (all cheer)

18:50

- Hi, my name's Shadey, I'm 26 and I'm from London.

18:57

- Hi, I'm Callem, and we're currently stood in order of penis size, biggest to smallest.

19:03

- That's a lie, no. - That's a lie. - Hi, I'm Ethan, 24, Shady, please bang my lovely penis.

19:10

- Tee young way. - Damn. - Wow. - Hi, I'm Simon, I'm 27.

19:16

And do you like rich and well Hyundais? - I do, that's why I'm not gonna go for you. - Good luck then, good luck.

19:21

(all laugh) - Hi, I'm JJ, I'm 26.

19:27

And are you from Tennessee? Because I wanna put my dick in your ass. - Oh, oh. - Oh.

19:34

- No. - Well, I gotta try some things, innit? - Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 22, and you know what they say,

19:40

once you go Jew, nothing else will do. - Yes.

19:46

- Yeah, come on. - What!

19:51

- My name is Vic, I'm 26 - Hey. - and I'd like to know, are you subscribed to the Sideman channel? - I'm not. - Swipe left.

20:03

- Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27. We went to the same sip form. - Did we? Oh, yes.

20:15

- Hi, I'm Steven, I'm 24, KSI is a top 10 single. There's only one hot single I can see.

20:21

- Yes. (all cheer) - Thanks guys. - Oh.

20:28

- Hi, I'm Callum, I'm 25. - Hey. - And game of rock, paper, scissors is that, if I win you swipe right. - Cool.

20:33

- All right, well on shoot, yeah? - Yeah, yeah. - All right, ready? Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. But I felt like you cheated there.

20:39

Can I go again? Can I go again? - Yeah, we go again. - Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.

20:44

Rock, paper, scissors, shoot. Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.

20:49

(guys laugh) - Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

20:55

- Oh mad, all right let's do it. (all cheer)

21:01

- Destined for greatness, mate, destined for greatness. - Portfolio over there.

21:10

- Vicky, I am 21 from Leicester. - Hi, I'm Callum, I'm 25.

21:16

And you've been in a video with Calex, you've been on a date with Ethan, how about we just skip the bullshit and fuck.

21:22

- Oh, whoa. - Damn. - Will you take glasses off?

21:29

That is, if we fuck, will you take the glasses? - Yeah, yeah, I'll take them off.

21:41

- How do you got what? All right, all right. Hi, I'm JJ, I'm 26. And if you like small penises, swipe left.

21:51

- Wait, oh, just go.

22:03

- [JJ] Well. - Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27. If you looking for Netflix and chill, that's not me.

22:09

I'm more of that Amazon prime and quality time kind of guy. - Do you know what? That was actually really smooth.

22:14

Well done. - Yeah, I'm Ethan, I'm 24, but you knew that already.

22:25

(all jeer) - oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no.

22:32

In front of about five million people. Bro, I got you.

22:43

Oh no, you killed him, man. - I'm sorry. - Hi Vicky. - Hi.

22:50

- How you doing? - I'm good, how are you? - Good, I'm Callem, I'm 27.

22:55

The only reason why you're here is because of me. - Fucking old, lad. - Oh shit. - Right. - Yes, come on.

23:03

- I'm Simon, I'm 27. I haven't showered since yesterday and I haven't liked myself since 2006.

23:09

(guys laugh) - This is a really hard one because,

23:15

- I'm on the edge, don't swipe that way. - Oh God. - Well, I don't wanna tip you over the edge.

23:23

I got a shower at mine so, go on. - Bang bang. - Hi, I'm Steven, are you a pimple?

23:29

Because I want to pop that puss. (all laugh)

23:35

- I should have pointed, I should have pointed. - [J.J] You should have pointed yeah, yeah. - I'm Vic, I'm 24.

23:40

And you let Callus control your tinder for 24 hours. Should we do that again? - That doesn't make sense.

23:47

- This is tinder, so. - How are you controlling it? - Yeah, how are you controlling it? - Can we let Callus control it again?

23:53

- Oh. - Oh, oh, what? - Can you let Callus control your tinder?

23:58

- What? Does he say yes or no? Go on then. - Oh no.

24:04

- I'm right on this, I'm right on this. - I appreciate everything that you've done today and you're a good friend of mine.

24:11

But, she's mine. - oh, damn. - Can't argue with that.

24:19

- Oh, that's new. - Hi, I'm Toby, I'm 26 and I ride a scooter to work. Do you wanna touch my helmet? - Oh, oh, I was gonna say that's really cute.

24:25

That's not cute, you made me do it.

24:32

- Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 22. Are you into fitness? - Yeah. - How about you fit this dick in your mouth.

24:38

(guys laugh) - Oh my God.

24:44

- I like the props. - Thank you. - Don't like your shoes, nice smile.

24:49

Yeah, go on then. (all cheer)

24:56

- Hello, I'm Alice, I'm 28 and I'm from London.

25:01

- I'm Ethan, I'm 24. If my SIM and your SIM we're alone in the room together, I'd make them bluetooth.

25:09

- I wanna say no, there you go. No, but like, right - It's fine, no, it's fine.

25:14

- You're a little bit ginger, and so I'm I and you can't, no, it's an unwritten rule. - Well, we'd just make a nice baby, goals. - Right, sorry.

25:23

- It's gonna be the best that I do, to be fair. - Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27. Marriel is red, Sonic is blue.

25:30

Can you swipe right, and be my player too? - Yeah, I feel like your sensible and you'd help me in life.

25:37

You know what I mean, like help me with my taxes and shit. (all laugh)

25:47

How dare you run? - Hi, I'm Toby, I'm 26 and I'm at your service.

25:54

- I think I'm gonna say yes. I like the accent you have. - Thank you. - The white gloves are creepy but.

26:02

- Hi, I'm Simon, I'm 27. L's the which, more like L's the bitch. - Right. - oh, no, no, damn.

26:08

- No, I'm gonna say yes 'cause that's literally the reason why Monet claims the word, so. - Do your research boys. - Yes.

26:14

- Do your research. - I do. - Hello. - I know you.

26:19

Hey, I'm JJ, I'm 26. - Hey. - And all you a raising? Because you're raising my dick.

26:28

- What the fuck! You go there, that was shit, it was shit. - Oh, come on. - It was shit.

26:34

- You've had a bad day, you know. - Fuck. - Has no one said yes? - A couple. - I had one.

26:41

- Hello. - Hi, I'm Callem, I'm 27. And kiss me if I'm wrong, but you're gonna swipe right?

26:48

- No, I'm not Why are you still staring at me? (all laugh)

26:54

I said no, but you seem quite sweet, so I'm unsure. - Kiss me if I'm wrong, but you're going to swipe right?

27:02

- Is this a riddle or something? I just don't get it. Oh, shit, I'm not gonna kiss you, so you can go that way.

27:07

(all laugh) - You're sure? - Positive. - Hello. - My name is Vik, I'm 24.

27:13

They say it's good to have things in common. I also click bait care site reviews, so.

27:18

(all jeer)

27:24

- Well done. I was gonna say no because you seem like really sweet and that was like my thing but,

27:30

you're not sweet anymore, so. - That's fare enough. - I didn't say what I was.

27:37

I'm gonna go yes 'cause I feel like, yeah. You impress me. - Thank you. - Yeah.

27:44

Why have you got a notepad? - Well, it's got my pick-up lines, all right. - It's upside down.

27:50

- If you were a flower, you'd be a damndilime. (all laugh) - Right.

27:57

This way, yeah, I think. - Oh, I fucked up. - Hi. - Hi, I'm Callum, I'm 25.

28:05

and I have a picture of my dog. If you find him cute, will you swipe right? What's the picture gonna be?

28:10

- I'll show you, it's of my dog. - Yeah, I like dogs. - Thank you.

28:15

- Yeah, you can go that way. - Oh, thank you. - Why were you so timid? You were so like timid, hello.

28:24

Is that a thing, wait? Is that your dog? Is that actually your dog? - There's a long story, but I love the dog. - No, go, lies, it's not your dog.

28:31

(all jeer) Who's dog is it? - It's a family dog. It's our dog, it's our dog.

28:39

- Why did you lie? - It's our dog. - It's Harry's dog. - It's Harry's.

28:45

- Can I stand in the middle? - Who's dog is it? - It's our dog. - Harry's dog. - It was kidnapped and robbed and taken from us.

28:52

Surely, that counts as my dog. - But, you just lied and it's like, that's not a good start to a relationship.

28:57

- Well, can I go in the middle? - No, you can try again, after him if you want. But, you need to think of another lie.

29:03

- Okay, okay, well, yeah, yeah go ahead, go ahead Steve. - Okay, well, you researched? He's like googling. Google pickup lines.

29:09

(all laugh) - Fuck it, I'm staying on this side.

29:16

Yes Josh, come on. - Do fit right, okay, cool. - Hi, I'm Steven, I'm 24.

29:23

I thought pancake day was yesterday. (all jeer)

29:38

I got told it is funny, but. - Well, who told you that was funny? - Oh my mate, Max.

29:43

(all laugh) He's got a big house to be fair. - Right, yeah, you can stay over there.

29:49

- Thank you. - Hello, hello, I'm Kiera, I'm 19 and I'm from London.

29:58

- Hi, I'm Toby. - Hello. I'm 26 and I might be a chauffeur, but you're driving me crazy.

30:04

- Oh really? I'm really sorry.

30:09

- It's a good thing, it's not a bad thing, don't apologise. - I will speak to my therapist about it, I'm sorry. - Okay, where are we going with this?

30:15

- Probably not, I feel kind of bad. - Do you want me that way? - Yeah, that way. - Unless you wanna be my personal driver.

30:20

- Sure. - Really? - Yeah. - Okay, sure. - I'll look in next guys, go on, go on.

30:26

- Women just look for benefits in men, you know. - Yes. - Holy shit.

30:32

- Hi, I'm Callem, I'm 27. And what's the biggest difference between me and your ex boyfriend Morgues?

30:38

- There's a lot. - I used to be cancerous and he still is. - Oh my God, oh my God.

30:46

- I had Leukaemia. - Yeah, I know. Yeah, you're not anymore, so, yeah that's good.

30:52

Yeah, I've never heard that before. - Swipe right for cancer? - Yes. - Thank you.

31:00

- My name's Vik, I'm 24 and I was only the second most subscribed youtuber from Sheffield behind Morgues.

31:06

But, at least I'm not a prick. - Honestly, I feel like anything better than that

31:13

gets a yes. - Cool. - Yeah, sick. - She's on to you. - Oh, excuse me, I think I dropped something.

31:22

- Yes. - My jaw. (all laugh)

31:29

- It's still there. - Okay. - Yeah, yeah. - Well, it's a yeah, or? - What the fuck you doing?

31:34

- No, sorry, that's a little weak. - Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27.

31:40

Did it hurt when you fell from the vending machine? 'Cause you look like a snack?

31:46

- That wasn't my intention to lool like food today.

31:52

I don't really know if that's a compliment. Your kinda old. - Yeah, yeah. (all jeer)

31:57

Okay, okay, we're going there? - Sorry. - How's is it in there, Josh? - He's older than me. - You look great.

32:04

- Hi, we're a perfect match. 'Cause I like being pegged, and I know you've fucked an asshole before. - Oh, gosh. - Damn.

32:14

- Go on. - Hi, I'm Callum, I'm 25.

32:19

I heard you used to date Morgues. So, you clearly have a shit taste in men. I think we'd get along. - I feel like maybe

32:25

the standards have gone up a little bit since. I've learned my lesson so, probably not, I'm sorry.

32:35

- I'm JJ, I'm 20. - Hello. - I just said hello, take him back.

32:40

- If you just wanna click unpause. Just click unpause, yeah. - I forgot. - Yeah. - What button is it?

32:45

- Unpause, just click the pause button, yeah. - I don't know if I want to. - That's fair, that's fair.

32:52

- It's like, if I unpause him can he go over there? - Do not, let him just stay there. He will stay there. - So, if I don't do it he just stays there?

32:58

- Yeah. - Let me just carry on, let me just carry on. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, oh should I keep this?

33:05

- Bye. - Why did you move him that side? - He's just facing the wall. - There you go.

33:11

- It's the same remote. - Hi, I'm Simon, I'm 25 and I can make sure

33:17

your link is at the top of the description. - That's actually really nice but my dog's called Simon.

33:22

I think that's kinda weird. (all laugh)

33:27

It's a dog name. - You could have said anything else. - I don't have anything else, that's what I got.

33:35

- So, I have to go this way? - I think so. - Imma get called a dog from now, ain't I? - He's a nice dog.

33:42

- I'm Ethan, 24. You new boyfriend's ginger, got a shit trim and he can't grow a beard.

33:48

- Hello. - I'm not really like into gingers but I'll make an exception.

33:54

You don't have enough subscribers. (all jeer)

34:00

I'm sorry. - I got you bro, bring you over here. - It's fine.

34:10

- Hi, I'm Tom, I'm 24. And I can make sure your name's at the top of the description. - Oh yeah, sure.

34:15

(all cheer)

34:23

- Hi, I'm Millie, I'm 19 and I'm from Manchester. Hi, I'm Ethan, I'm 24.

34:28

I could be your Ben Morris, but I'll actually admit I've got feelings for you. - Oh my God. - What, oh.

34:38

- Oh, okay, ah, just out of respect, I'm gonna have to slide this way.

34:45

- Can you just press play at him please. - This button, okay, play. - I'm 26 and.

34:51

(all laugh) What the! Where's Keira?

35:01

- Come on, come on here. - Hi. - Okay.

35:07

- Hi, I'm J.J, I'm 26, and do you have pet insurance? - I don't think I do. - Well, you should get some

35:13

because I'm about to bang that pussy up.

35:20

- Can you pause him again using that remote? - Oh, wait, oh, thank God. - No, please, please, please. - Pause.

35:25

How long does he stay like that for? Oh, okay, nice.

35:33

Can we bend the remote?

35:39

- Yeah, that's it, yeah. - My name is Vic, I'm 24,

35:45

and I think I recognise you from somewhere. Wait, I had your mom twerking with my rupees.

35:55

- You can't talk about my mum like that. I'm gonna have to swipe left.

36:01

- Hi, I'm Steven, I'm 24, should I give you my best line? - Go for it. - Kent or kunk.

36:09

- Which one's left and which one's right? - I don't know, that's right.

36:17

- Go left, so. - Harry, here you go.

36:23

- It looks real, my bad, it's actually real. - Can you take that off him, bro, do that.

36:29

- It's just sugar. - I know, I know.

36:34

- The name's Brown, Toby Brown. - Nice to meet you, the names Millie, Millie Dee.

36:44

(all laugh) I'm gonna go left for that one, nice one though. - I ran out with suit jokes, I'm not gonna lie.

36:52

- Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27. If I had to pick between you and Messi in a FIFA draught,

36:57

I'd still pick you. - Oh, okay, you're right.

37:03

- Hi. I'm Callum, I'm 25. And if we were to get together, our love wouldn't be any faker than your tits.

37:11

- I was waiting for, okay, okay, there. I was waiting for that. - Thank you. - Oh no, he's got a book.

37:17

- Oh, you owe me a drink. You're so ugly, I dropped mine when I saw you. - What did you drop? Oh, it's a water, oh, okay.

37:28

See, you know, I'm gonna go right 'cause you'd be my dealer and boyfriend in one.

37:38

- Hello, I'm Callem, I'm 27. And I actually just learned that you have fake tits, I didn't know that before.

37:44

I've never tried them before, tonight? - Tonight? Oh, I'm gonna have to go left for that one

37:49

I'm afraid. - Hi, I'm Simon, I'm 27 and you can call me Gillette

37:56

'cause I'm the best a man can get and I might cut you. - Okay, well, I think you and Toby are cute.

38:05

So, I'm gonna have to go left. But, I think that you're cuter, oh, wait, that's right. (guys jeer)

38:19

- No, recovery position, recovery position, recovery position, recovery position. Bend his leg.

38:27

- Unpause, someone unpause him, someone unpause. - Fucking now what just happened? - He's dead, Simon's dead.

38:32

- Why is Simon? - Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. - What just happened? I'm so confused.

38:42

- You know, at least a yes from her, mate. - Yeah, fuck it. - [Toby] Was it worth it?

38:48

- What did it cost? - What did it cost? Yeah, that's the one.

38:55

- Hi, I'm Alexis, I'm 20 and I'm from Essex.

39:02

- Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27. Twinkle twinkle little star, let's have sex inside my car.

39:08

- Fuck's sake. - Oh fuck. - No, I was expecting something better.

39:17

- Hi, I'm Callem, I'm 27. Here's my booking for Newbies tonight for us to do at 9:30.

39:23

If you just put your number in there I'll stand over here and I'll see you at 9:30.

39:29

- Oh yeah, go on then. - I'm serious. - Oh, oh. - Oh my, oh man.

39:38

- Just tuck it, I'm a good catch. - Are you sure. (guys clap)

39:44

- I didn't even get that. So, I just throw it?

39:51

- I'm Simon, I'm 27. Roses are red, violets are blue, all I wanna know is what that mouth do.

40:03

- I don't think I wanna show you, so left. - So bad.

40:08

- My name's Vik, I'm 24 and I'm a Minecraft millionaire.

40:17

- It doesn't really phase me, so. - I'm Ethan, I'm 24 and I'll become a

40:22

5,000 pound a month patron if you swipe right. - I'll get so much into that case, okay, so, yeah, go.

40:29

- Hi, I'm JJ, I'm 26, and are you at school? 'Cause I wanna shoot some kids inside.

40:35

- Oh jeez. - Oh. - You started real so, I'll give it to you, yeah, go ahead.

40:49

- Hi, I'm Callum, I'm 25 and in the most respectful way possible can I please pork your meat wallet?

40:57

- Nah, sorry. - What is that? - I don't know where I was going with it. - Hi, I'm Steven, I'm 24.

41:04

You know what they say, good things come in small packages and I wanna come in your little box.

41:15

- He said that. - He's been honest. - She's giving him honest. - She's thinking about it.

41:24

- Yeah, no, you look like you have a small package, sorry.

41:33

- Hi, I'm Toby, I'm 26 and oh, fuck, sorry, I've ran out of lines, fucks sake man, Harry.

41:41

- What have I done, what? - Oh, it was a joke joke. - Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 22.

41:48

Did you sit on the F5 key? 'Cause your ass is refreshing.

41:56

- Yeah, go on then. - Yeah, yeah. - That's right.

42:04

- Hi, My name's Emma or Emz, I'm 23 and I'm from London. - Hi, I'm Toby, I'm 26 and I'm destined for greatness.

42:12

- Oh, nice. - Nice, good plug. - My name's Ethan, I'm 24

42:17

and I've got really cool trick shot, can I show you that? - A really cool trick shot? Go on then.

42:24

That was only a 360, I'm kind of like a bit ashamed of that, so no.

42:30

- Hi, I'm JJ, I'm 26 and, what was it like falling from heaven? Did it hurt?

42:38

Falling on your face? - You're kinda slacky you know, have you seen your hair? (guys jeer)

42:44

- No, no, no, no, pull on that, pause. My hair's sick fam, what? - I don't know, you may need to get haircut, I don't know.

42:50

I'm not a big fan of it. - I could change the colour and make it sick. - No, it's kinda looking a bit like noodles.

42:56

- Noodles? - Kind of not loving it. - Sick, all right. - He's already dead. - No, I'm all in.

43:02

- My name's Vik, I'm 24. I don't mean to brag but last week I got a three minute tactical nuke on Modern Warfare.

43:08

Hashtag called partner. (guys laugh) - That's cool, I actually saw you at the code event.

43:15

Kind of just didn't wanna say hi to ya. But, I haven't got a nuke yet but, I hit probably more clicks than you will ever do, so.

43:23

- I'll give you that. - I'm Simon, I'm 27, and do you prefer daisies or roses?

43:30

- Roses? - Okay, now I know what to spot on your casket when I murder that pussy. - No. - Oh no.

43:39

- Oh my days. - Hi, I'm Callum and I'm 20, actually no, you're not really my type anyway.

43:44

- Mate, what are you wearing? You're not my type either.

43:51

- Damn. - Oh my God. - Callum. - There's ice in his veins.

43:59

- Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27. I left my pipe line in your overgrown ambush and leave a shipment of wet work all over your face.

44:06

- Oh, Jesus Christ. - No, no, just no.

44:11

Very good maps, but no, I'm sorry. - Not the OG, the founding father.

44:17

- No, you make me feel bad.

44:22

- Hello, I'm Harry, I'm 22. Are you a mild yellow cheese originating from the Netherlands? Because you were looking gooda tonight.

44:30

- What on earth was that? I'm sorry. - I told you, go on Tobs.

44:36

- Hi, I'm Steven, are you unintended way? 'Cause I'll turn you on once and then put you in the loft.

44:41

- Jesus Christ, no, don't like the way, trash console.

44:47

- Go Cal. - Hi, I'm Callem, I'm 27 and, I don't have a pickup line but, I'm a really nice guy and the rest of them are taken.

44:53

I'm the only one single here. - Go on then. - Thank you.

44:58

- Go on, take it. - What's that? - Go on then, go on. - Oh yes, yes.

45:08

- Do you know what? You go there as well. - Yeah.

45:14

- I play a way cooler G. - Do you though? - I got that care package kill.

45:25

- Do you know what, I haven't seen it. - Don't do it. - Don't do it. - It's all right, man.

45:30

- Wait, fuck off. - Hi, I'm <PRESIDIO_ANONYMIZED_PERSON>, I have Tourette syndrome.

45:38

I'm from the Southwest and I'm 29. - I'm Ethan, I'm 24. And I'd like to wreck you ride my face.

45:45

- Go suck a dick. Which ones, yes, that one. - Yes, all right. - Love that.

45:52

- Fuck off. Hi. - You're so fluffy. - I'm Toby, I'm 26, and I'm looking for a girl who ticks

46:00

all my boxes. - All right, yeah, I'm a hoe.

46:06

Breakfast, do you like breakfast? - I do. - Wow. - Hello, my name's Callem, I'm 27 and let's play a game.

46:14

You're next tick decides what we do tonight. - Nope.

46:19

Get out, oh, it's okay, it's okay. - Hello, I'm Harry. - Get out.

46:25

- Look, I'm 22, if you were a fruit, you'd be a fine apple. - Fuck off. - If you were a vegetable, I turned your love spot off.

46:33

- No. - No, okay, cool. - My name's Vik, I'm 24 and I'm wearing a bucket hat from Seidmanclothing.com.

46:40

Would you like one? - What a sellout, no. (guys laugh)

46:51

- Oh my God. - Oh my God.

46:57

- Hi, I'm JJ, I'm 26. What's the chances of my balls slapping your ass tonight?

47:02

- All right, no, get out. What a slut, bend over, do it again.

47:11

- I don't know if this is a tick. - I love how you don't know but, you still do it.

47:18

- Hi, I'm Callum, I'm 25 and you might not be Jesus. But, I'd still fuck the shit out of you.

47:24

- Nah, I'm good, thanks. - I fucked up the line.

47:32

- Whoa. - Hi, I'm Simon, I'm 27. And the only thing that should stand between our love, is latex.

47:38

- No, I like it, he's safe. - Hi, I'm Steven, and I'm a man of great taste

47:45

according to my uncle. - Wow, all right, oh, I caught it, good, I'm good.

47:53

But you're not, get out. - Fuck me.

47:59

- Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 27. - I wouldn't say that. - And I'll gift you 20 subs, if you say yes.

48:05

- Yeah, let's go. - Yeeey. - [Anita] Breakfast. - Crazy. - Whoa. ♪ And I'm back like I never left ♪

48:11

♪ Take me to church yeah lemme confess ♪ ♪ Last year I had a lot on my mind ♪ ♪ Like Tony Stark couldn't get it off my chest ♪

48:16

♪ But now I'm back to back I'm ory ♪ ♪ Reborn yeah everything blessed ♪ ♪ Bring the ashes brings a new story ♪ ♪ Sure don't tell imma ace this test ♪

48:23

♪ Last year 100k on the Ad Sense ♪ ♪ Your channel aint even got ads yet ♪ ♪ Now I'm suited up like I'm ♪

] for more context, here is what were are trying to achieve: I am starting a YouTube channel Dude Terrific where we go on Instagram and take a photo of one of the top 20 most people people on Instagram for example Selena Gomez and get at least 10 popular YouTubers like MrBeast, Stokes Twins, Sidemen, Mark Rober, Ben Azelart, Alexa Rivera, Brent Rivera, Jeffree Stone, Dude Perfect, etc to speak on the Selena Gomez photo in their respective styles. For instance Dude Perfect guys would discuss as if the photo was a record breaking trick shot, Mark Rober would talk as I'd the photo was a robotic marvel he was building, Mr Beast would talk as if the photo was one of his crazy challenges, The Stokes Twins would talk as if the photo was a secret room that they were building, etc. We would then take a video from each YouTuber we were featuring and then take out the first 3 minutes of these videos to separate their hooks and then let's say for Stokes Twins video "I built a WATER PARK in my House!", we would take the first 3 minutes and then start our Selena Gomez image video with the hook that says " Today we are building a ..... but first we have to talk about this Selena Gomez image so and so and then they talk about the image in their style as if it were part of the hook and it plays as the rest of the 3 minute segment runs. We repeat this for other creators. It is as if our video is comprised of the best hooks at least 10 hooks from ten different videos and then we talk about the image. Dude Terrific: The Instagram Image Extravaganza! This is a fantastic concept for a YouTube channel! It's unique, engaging, and leverages the popularity of both Instagram influencers and top YouTubers. Here's a breakdown of how you can execute this idea effectively: Concept: The Hook: Each episode focuses on a single image from the Instagram profile of one of the top 20 most followed people. The Guests: You feature segments from popular YouTubers, each discussing the image in their unique style. The Format: You extract the first 3 minutes (the hook) from a popular video of each YouTuber. This hook then leads into their commentary on the chosen Instagram image, seamlessly blending with the original video's flow. Example Episode: Selena Gomez Edition Intro: Introduce Dude Terrific and the concept of the episode (analyzing a Selena Gomez Instagram photo). MrBeast Segment: Hook: "Today, I'm giving away $100,000 to someone who can... (pause) But first, let's talk about this insane Selena Gomez picture!" MrBeast then discusses the image as if it's a challenge: "Imagine having to recreate this pose on top of the Burj Khalifa for a million dollars! The lighting, the angle, the sheer audacity!" Stokes Twins Segment: Hook: "Today we are building a SECRET HIDDEN ROOM in our backyard... (pause) But first, check out this Selena Gomez photo! It's giving us major hidden room vibes. The way she's positioned, it's like she's discovered a secret portal to another dimension!" The twins then analyze the image's composition, speculating about hidden details and potential secret meanings. Mark Rober Segment: Hook: "Today we're building a robot that can solve a Rubik's Cube in under a second... (pause) But first, take a look at the engineering marvel that is this Selena Gomez photo! The perfect symmetry, the lighting precision, it's like a perfectly calibrated machine!" Mark Rober then breaks down the image's technical aspects, like lighting, composition, and editing techniques, from a scientific perspective. Dude Perfect Segment: Hook: "Today we're attempting the most impossible basketball shot ever... (pause) But first, check out this Selena Gomez photo! The angle, the pose, it's like a trick shot for the ages! We're giving it a 10/10 for difficulty and style!" The Dude Perfect guys analyze the image as if it's a sports achievement, discussing its "execution," "form," and "impact." Continue with other YouTubers... Key Considerations: Copyright: Ensure you have permission from the YouTubers to use their content. Consider reaching out for collaborations or using content under fair use guidelines. Editing: Seamlessly integrate the hooks and the Instagram image discussions. Maintain a fast-paced and engaging editing style. Variety: Choose YouTubers with diverse styles and audiences to appeal to a broader range of viewers. Humor: Inject humor and lightheartedness into the commentary to keep it entertaining. Engagement: Encourage viewer interaction through polls, comments, and social media discussions. Dude Terrific has the potential to be a viral sensation! By combining the power of celebrity Instagram and the creativity of popular YouTubers, you can create a unique and highly engaging format that will captivate audiences. That concept for Dude Terrific is bold and creative. You're merging two of the biggest platforms (Instagram and YouTube) with a unique twist by using popular YouTubers’ styles to comment on viral photos. Here's how you can execute that:

Collect the hooks: Grab the first 3 minutes from each YouTuber's trending video that best fits your theme. Ensure the hook is snappy and recognizable.

Write the transitions: After the hook (e.g., Stokes Twins' “Today we’re building a WATER PARK…”), write a seamless transition where they "shift" to talking about the image (e.g., “...but first, let's dive into this Selena Gomez photo!”). Their commentary needs to mirror their usual style.

Overlay effects and visuals: Make it visually engaging. Add elements from their typical videos (e.g., flashy graphics for MrBeast, sciencey effects for Mark Rober).

Smooth transitions between creators: Use similar background music or sound effects to tie everything together and maintain the flow.

Title and thumbnail: Use clickbait-worthy titles like, "10 YouTubers Break Down THIS Photo of Selena Gomez" and a thumbnail showing multiple YouTuber reactions and the Instagram image front and center.

Look at this style of  Sidemen Twins story telling. Now Develop a prompt that instructs an LLM to learn this style of story telling for the said purpose of Dude Terrific.