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Assistant: Title: wrapped up in dissonance
        Author: Anonymous undefined 
        Chapter: 1/1 
        Summary: Fade expects her time in the Protocol to be nothing more than a temporary stop.Neon proves her wrong.
        Contents: Summary:
            
              Fade expects her time in the Protocol to be nothing more than a temporary stop.Neon proves her wrong.
            
        

        
  Notes:





    
      there are a lot of my own ideas in here about fade's lore since we have so little and i've messed a bit with the timeline but i really dont think its anything crazy. fade's brother is intentionally left unnamed, mostly bc i was too lazy to figure out a name sorrytitle from time is dancing by ben howard
    

    (See the end of the work for more notes.)



  





    
        
          Hazal is fifteen and her parents are dead. She's coming back from school, trailing behind her brother while trying to stuff her book back in her bag, and doesn't realize he's stopped in the doorway until she runs into his back. Her brother is frighteningly still. She steps to the side, trying to peer around him. "What-"Immediately, a hand shoots out and covers her eyes, stopping her from seeing anything. "Hazal," he says, voice carefully calm. "Turn around and wait outside."A break-in, she's told later. Not targeted, but a mix up on whose house it was. A tragedy but ultimately an accident.She's fifteen, cursed with a power that brings nothing but ill omens and she's too smart to believe the official report.Based on the look on her brother's face, he is too.Hazal is sixteen when she leaves the home she's spent her whole life in. Her brother comes back from work one day, panic written all over his face, and tells her to go pack a bag. He hasn't been sleeping well, constantly spacing out during their meals together. She thinks it's her fault at first, the fragile control on Nightmare she has slipping away in the days after the funerals. But it goes on for a year and Hazal knows not even Nightmare has the power to haunt someone for that long. No one except her.She doesn't question the order. She picks two of her favorite books, grabs a too-big jacket from her father's closet, and follows her brother out the door.Her hands are steady the whole time. Hazal is nineteen and she has no idea what they're doing. They're not running—at least, she isn't aware of it if they are—but they also have made it a habit to not linger in one place for too long. She doesn't mind. Moving around means more bounties to pick up and she's gotten good at tracking people, missing or otherwise. After her first successful job, her brother takes her to a local bakery and they sit on a bench in a nearby park, munching on pieces of baklava. "You've always been too perceptive for your own good," he tells her, pride evident in his voice and the first genuine smile she's seen in months stretching across his face. There's only a few years difference between them, but recently he's seemed far older. The dark circles under his eyes are a permanent feature these days, cheeks a little gaunt from his habit of skipping meals. Most days, he'll only eat when she shoves a plate of food in front of his face. But right now he looks a little like he did before their life went to sh@t, so she only half-heartedly tries to stop him from rustling her hair and tries to ignore the burning behind her eyes, a painful longing in her chest for something she can never have again. Hazal doesn't know what exactly he's been doing, though. Research, she knows, and meeting with contacts from his old job. Other than that, all she's been able to decipher from the few times she's caught a glimpse of his notes is that it has something to do with radiants. She waits for him to bring it up, to explain why he's so interested in the topic yet hasn't once mentioned it to her—a radiant. She wants him to explain what it is about their parents' deaths that has sent him down this line of research. She wants to understand why they are doing all this when they could be home. She waits. He never tells her. Hazal is twenty and her brother is gone.Hazal is twenty-three and she has no idea what she's doing. She stays in Istanbul, only leaving when a job requires her to. She likes the little run-down apartment she finds herself living in and makes friends with the older woman a few doors down from her, helps her carry her groceries in exchange for home-cooked meals. She unintentionally starts caring for a group of stray cats living behind the building until one manages to follow her all the way back to her door and Hazal is impressed enough to let her inside. Most of her nights are spent walking the streets of the city. Her handle on Nightmare has gotten better over the years, the two of them settling into a reluctant partnership, but it is still ruthless in her dreams. She picks up a bad smoking habit and drinks more coffee than is healthy in order to prolong her body's need for sleep. It's a routine she's satisfied with for the most part. Except none of it matters because her brother is still missing. She searches hundreds of databases, picks up jobs from over a dozen different organizations, but doesn't find even a mention of his name. Each time she thinks she's onto something, the trail goes cold and she's back at square one. A breakthrough finally comes after she finishes a job for an ex-Kingdom scientist. "If you're looking for a group interested in radiants besides Kingdom, your best bet would be the Valorant Protocol," he tells her.Hazal narrows her eyes, tries to rack her brain for anything she may have heard relating to it but nothing comes to mind. "The what?""Valorant," he repeats, obnoxiously releasing another puff of smoke from his cigar. There's a hint of a smirk, a confidence that wasn't there before. He knows he has information she doesn't. A rarity. "It's not well-known publicly, but they've been responsible for most of the radianite related issues in recent years. If you’re right about your brother being taken, they’re the only other group I can think of who would have the means to do it and make it all disappear. It's being run by two ex-Kingdom employees: Liam Byrne and Sabine Callas." "People said she was dead." Assassinated, is what Hazal heard in passing. A terrible loss to the science community across the world according to the few articles she’s read. She doesn't know anything about the other name but it won't be hard to find more information. Kingdom has always been terrible at hiding details about their employees. It's shaky information at best, a ploy to get her killed at worst, but she's running out of options. Besides, it's been a while since she's had the chance to let Nightmare off its leash and the both of them have been more agitated recently because of it. This, at the very least, will give her a chance to resolve that issue with whatever unlucky souls they come across in her search. Fade is twenty-four when she officially joins Valorant. She expects to be tossed in a cell deep in the basement of their headquarters after they find her. Nightmare is fighting against the fragile hold she has on it, furious at being forcefully subdued. Neither of them will go quietly. Except when they direct her out of the VLT/R, she's taken to a plain holding cell just a few halls away from the landing pad. She's offered water and assistance with her injuries, both of which she refuses. They uncuff her, too, and Hazal almost laughs in their faces at the arrogance. She's worked in much worse circumstances. They leave her there for hours. She doesn't move an inch.Nightmare is restless, though. When the door finally opens again, she only barely manages to yank it back before it can latch onto Cypher. To his credit, he barely flinches at the sight of its snapping jaw. "So," Cypher starts once he's sitting across from her, carefully placing a recorder on the table between them. It's close enough for her to grab if she needs to make a quick escape. "Let's talk."A month later, Fade finds herself working with a team for the first time.Bounty work is inherently a solo gig. On the few occasions she was hired by similar types of organizations, she rarely ever worked with someone else. More people involved in a job means more variables to account for. It's always been easier to do things alone, but Brimstone and Viper make it clear that working in a group is something she'll need to get used to. Her first mission is a simple one. Five of them spread out around a site of Legion's interest, ready to defend against any potential attackers. They stay there for six days, and each night Cypher somehow talks her into playing a game of chess. Fade has never liked the game, always found it far more time consuming than it was worth, and this new routine of theirs has only solidified her opinion. But there's nothing else to do on this stakeout and she has no desire to entertain small talk with any of the other three agents.It's almost comical, sitting in the middle of a site bursting with radianite with a small travel-sized chess board between them. Barely a month ago, all these people were just names on a file. Faces she thought were responsible for stealing away her last remaining family. Now she's expected to trust them to cover her back in the field.If only her brother could see her now. "I think you will find you have more in common with some of the other agents than you expect," Cypher says out of the blue on their last night. "It never hurts to reach out to those you are now working with to get to know them better."Fade grunts an acknowledgement but says nothing more. She's read everything there is to know about these people, has delved into the worst of their dreams and uncovered secrets not even those they've lived with for years know. There is very little she has in common with any of them. Cypher smiles like he knows what she's thinking, the edges of his eyes crinkling through his mask. "People are always more than what is said on paper. You and I know that better than anyone." Her next mission is assigned two weeks after they return.It's a standard routine check in Venice to make sure there haven't been any recent signs of Omega Earth tampering. Fade would be more annoyed at being given such rudimentary assignments if it didn't leave her more time to search through all the information Cypher has helped compile.There's no reason to waste more resources than necessary on missions like these, so instead of sending five agents out, it ends up being just two of them. Fade hasn't spent any time around Neon. Most of the agents give her a wide berth, content to go about their business without ever having to interact outside of missions. Others are outright hostile. Neon, oddly enough, falls into the first category despite the way all the other duelists have made their distaste for her clear. It's a small mercy Brimstone chose the most tolerable one for this mission. Still, when Neon walks into the hangar and spots Fade leaning against the side of the VLT/R, the apprehension is clear on her face. "Did you read the mission brief?" Neon asks when she's stepping up into the vehicle.Fade eyes her, more than a little tempted to respond with a petty jab about how she's been waiting here long enough to have read the brief three times over. But aside from the poorly hidden discomfort at being forced alone with Fade, Neon doesn't sound hostile, and it's that observation that stills her tongue. Instead, all Fade says is, "Yes." It's good enough, apparently. There is no retort, no obvious annoyance on Neon's face at the curt answer. Fade gets a nod and that's the end of it. Neither of them speak for the rest of the flight. The mission goes just fine, of course.It goes a little too well, in Fade’s opinion, because after that they’re assigned another one together. And then another.And suddenly Fade finds herself with a seemingly permanent albeit reluctant mission partner in Neon. She understands why. It's a surprise but they do  work well together, for better or worse. Fade locates and restrains their target, and Neon quickly follows up before they can escape. It’s seamless for the most part, fine-tuned after weeks of working with each other. Neither of them have returned from a mission together severely injured, impressive considering how often they're shot at. That doesn’t stop Fade from going to find Viper to question the decision. “Do you have an issue with Neon?” Viper asks when she brings it up. “No,” Fade says, frowning. “But there are other initiators that could take my place. For some missions, it would be better for her if they did."As much as she hates to admit it, it's true. There have been multiple scenarios where it would have been easier if Neon had someone like Skye or Breach to support her. They've adjusted to accommodate Fade's limited utility in those moments but still, she'd rather not be the reason they get into a situation they can't get out of.She doesn’t get a response immediately, Viper too busy working on some kind of formula while Fade watches on silently. After a few minutes of this, she figures that’s all she’ll get and turns to leave. “Neon is one of the few agents who can work efficiently with you,” Viper finally says before Fade can get too far. “Right now the only one, to be completely honest. The others either don’t trust you or are scared of you. Sending you out with any of them would be a waste of everyone’s time and a risk to you both. You and Neon have proven you can work together just fine, and I’m not inclined to change something if it’s already working.” “Besides,” she continues with something like amusement in her voice. “I think it would do you good to spend some time around someone who isn’t Cypher or Omen.” Her nights aren't any better than they were before joining the Protocol. The only difference these days is she spends the hours after jolting awake wandering the halls of the base rather than walking the streets of Istanbul. Despite now living in one of the most secure places in the world, Fade doesn’t feel any safer than she did back in the city. The walls around her act like their own glorified prison, and she’s well aware of the fact she’s being watched at all hours of the day.She misses the anonymity of the night, where she could be just one of thousands of people avoiding the ghosts that haunt them. Here on this island, surrounded by a dozen other radiants with powers as destructive as her own, Fade still feels like a monster lurking in the shadows.They're still new at this.They've been sent to clear out a site in Morocco after getting reports of Legion activity. It turns into a bigger endeavor than what the intelligence suggests and the fight that ensues is one they’re not prepared for. It’s only by the skin of their teeth they manage to push back the team Legion sends, and if she’d been with anyone else, she doubts she would be returning to base alive. Fade has never been more grateful to have been forced to spend so much time with someone who despises her.It’s not good enough to stop Neon from getting grazed by a bullet, which leaves them in this situation:“Don’t!”"What's the issue?" Fade asks, trying not to sound as impatient as she feels. She's tired and desperately needs a shower to scrub off the sand clinging to her skin, but she needs to make sure Sage won't kill her for bringing back a still-bleeding Neon more than anything else. When she offers out a hand again, Neon jerks away, lightning sparking across her suit, horror on her face. Fade tries not to feel hurt at the rejection—has no right to after everything—but it's been almost two months now since the two of them started working together. She figured any hesitation Neon may have had after her recruitment would be gone by now. Or, at the very least, not be so extreme still to reject medical assistance. She pulls out her phone, confirming their extraction point before stuffing it back in her pocket. An uncomfortable silence hangs over them as they wait for KAY/O to pick them up. Paranoia at the chance of a surprise attack from a second wave of enemies has Fade on edge, and her focus shifts to keeping an eye on the nearby area, sending Nightmare out every few minutes to check."I could shock you." Fade looks back over at Neon, the prowler forming in her hand dissipating. "What?""I could shock you," she repeats, this time sounding as bitter as she’s ever heard her. She won't look at Fade, instead staring off to the side with hunched shoulders and a hand pressed against the wound. "It would be a lot worse than this." Fade doesn’t have the chance to begin to think of what to say before the VLT/R begins to descend nearby.The ride back is silent for the most part. It's only when they're a few minutes out from base that Neon finally speaks."I do trust you, you know," she says quietly. Clearly Fade hadn't done as good of a job hiding her initial reaction as she thought. That, or Neon is far more perceptive than she previously thought.It’s a delicate topic they’ve stumbled into, one that Fade has all but forgotten for the most part. She remembers some of what was in Neon’s nightmares, sure, but it’s been weeks since then. It’s not something Fade has a reason to linger on when it’s never been an issue since they started working together. “You wouldn’t.”“What?”“You wouldn’t have hurt me.”Neon frowns, looking almost angry. “You don’t know that.”“I do,” Fade says. “We’ve been working together long enough for something to have gone wrong already if your control is really as bad as you believe it is.”“But-”"I think," she interjects before Neon can spiral any further. "You don't give yourself enough credit for controlling it as well as you do." "I trust you, too," Fade adds after a moment, finds that she means it too despite the mixed emotions that truth brings with it. The problem is Fade has never been able to leave something she doesn't understand alone. It's what makes her a good tracker—curiosity and the unrelenting desire to find out more. The weeks pass and she and Neon continue to go on more missions together, alone or otherwise. She'd stretch to say they're  friends  now, and this is where she’s stumped. Fade can count on one hand the people she’d categorize as a friend in the Protocol and still have three fingers leftover, maybe two depending on Viper's mood. It's just not something she does, not something she cares to do. But she finds herself looking forward to the brief moments they share outside of missions. A quick stop by the library Fade sets up early in the mornings when Neon is on her way to training to show Fade a new picture of her dog from back home, or to tell her petty gossip she thinks Fade will find interesting.Sometimes, later in the evenings, Neon will find her reading in a small common room she’s claimed for herself. She’ll talk while Fade listens quietly, occasionally responding with a comment or two to reassure Neon she is listening. When it's clear she's starting to grow tired, Neon will leave to head back to her room. But there are rare nights when she’ll walk in looking exhausted with fear practically radiating off of her. Those nights she’s quiet, and more often than not ends up falling asleep on the couch across from Fade. It's temporary, Fade reminds herself when she's tugging a blanket over Neon's sleeping form. She's only here until Brimstone can fulfill his side of their deal and she has her brother back. None of this will matter once that happens.On the worst nights, she sees her family. Not dead yet, all of them still breathing. Still alive and still next to her. Her mother, who would insist on brushing out her hair despite Hazal's protests. Her father, making coffee in the kitchen so he could sneak her a taste before her mother could see.Then there's her brother. He never leaves her side in those dreams, always holding her hand when she gets scared and never complaining about how clingy his little sister is. She wakes up eventually, alone and now unfamiliar with how it feels like to have her mother's hands braiding her hair. She doesn't know what the coffee her father used to make tastes like anymore. She's never been able to replicate it perfectly, no matter how many times she tries. And her brother is nowhere near her, likely not even on the same earth. Those nights, she wakes up and doesn't stop Nightmare from clawing at her. It's a mercy, the kindest it can be, to help her forget. It’s almost a week after the group sent to Omega Earth returns when she sees Neon again.Fade doesn’t know the exact details of what happened, only that Neon came back with a shattered surge protector and any confidence she may have had in her ability to contain her radiance seems to have shattered along with it according to Viper when she goes to ask.“She’ll have to stay in a containment room for a few days until Killjoy can repair the suit,” Viper says. “Her radiance is too erratic right now to let her anywhere else on base.”Fade is pushing her luck already after barging into Viper’s lab unannounced, but she would rather have answers and deal with the consequences later than know nothing at all. “Alone? Shouldn’t someone stay with her?” “She said she didn’t want to see anyone. Sage and Killjoy are the only ones allowed for now. You’re just going to have to wait until she’s cleared.”So Fade waits, occupying herself with a copious amount of chess games with Cypher and several failed attempts at learning how to crochet with Omen in the library. Missions have been paused while they sort through what they found on Omega which means she can’t even volunteer for anything to escape out to the field. Then one night when she walks into the common room, ready to waste as many hours as she can before she has to give into the need for sleep, she finds Neon curled up at the opposite end of the couch, knees tucked to her chest and hugging a pillow tight. If she notices Fade’s entrance, she gives no indication. For a few seconds, Fade stands awkwardly in the doorway, unsure whether she should leave or not. It’s well-known this is where Fade spends most of her evenings. If Neon wanted to be alone, she could have picked one of the other dozens of rooms on base.Silence hangs heavy in the room. It is unnerving, she’ll admit, to see Neon like this. Fade has never known her to be someone who could sit still or keep quiet for longer than a few minutes. It would drive her crazy if it was anyone else, but she has a strange tolerance for the other woman that she doesn’t for most of the agents.Fade slowly closes her book, setting it down to the side. It’s clear Neon won’t be the one to speak first, if at all, which leaves her to be the one to try and begin navigating this minefield alone. Preferably without making her mood worse. “Omen tried to teach me how to crochet while you were gone,” Fade says, and immediately winces. Of all the things to open the conversation with. It does the job of getting Neon’s attention, at least. She finally looks at Fade, brow furrowed.“Crochet?” “It went terribly,” she says. “I think he was losing his patience by the end.” Neon huffs. “You really must have been bored.” Fade was, to an extent. Mostly she just needed something to distract herself that wasn’t pacing in her room or looking over the same intelligence in hopes that she would find something new. Any amusement from Neon quickly makes itself scarce, the same shame and guilt from before taking over again. “I almost fried Sage when she was trying to check me over,” Neon says quietly. “And when we were on Omega, I blew out the entire electrical grid. If KJ hadn’t already started the download, we would’ve left with nothing.” She glares down at the pillow in her arms. “I thought I was getting better with Sage and Reyna’s training, but it only took one mission to prove that I’m not.” There are several other variables Fade is sure that aren’t being mentioned—there’s always more than what the mission report says—but the fact is she wasn’t there. She doesn’t know the exact details, and she doesn’t need to if she’s being honest. It’s Sage and Reyna’s jobs to make Neon comfortable with her radiance in combat. It’s another thing altogether to live with it outside of battle. She remembers when she was younger and still struggling to get a grip on Nightmare. There were many nights of accidentally letting it loose and her brother paid the price for it, fear lingering on him in the morning even as he assured her it was fine.  “It’s okay, Hazal. You just need more time,”  he’d tell her while guilt threatened to swallow her whole. It went on like that for months until she was able to contain Nightmare’s effects to only herself. Even then, there were moments her grip would loosen on its leash. Still are. She wonders if anyone ever did the same for Neon—suffered through the pain that comes with learning and stuck around to help walk her through a strange and terrifying new world. Her father, maybe, considering the suit she wears was crafted by him.But maybe not, Fade realizes. Maybe the possibility of being hurt was too much for anyone to think the risk was worth it. It’s that thought that has her offering out a hand before she entirely realizes what she’s doing.Neon stares at it for a long moment, unmoving. Her eyes flicker up to Fade’s, a storm of emotions reflected in them, then back down before tentatively reaching out with her own.There’s the barest hint of static that passes between them at the first bit of contact. Neon’s hand is rough with callouses, and burn scars decorate the skin, some faded and others more recent that haven't entirely healed yet. It’s far more than Fade expects considering the gloves she always wears and how careful she usually is when using her radiance.“I don’t understand you,” Neon murmurs, lightly tracing the henna design on the back of Fade’s hand. “Even when we barely knew each other you were never afraid.”Fade stays still, lets Neon maneuver her hand as she wishes. There’s been moments out in the field where one of them had to drag the other into cover or help each other over an obstacle, but this is the first time contact between them has been intentional.  “You’re nowhere near the most terrifying thing I’ve seen in my dreams,” Fade says, allowing a small smile to slip free. Neon glances up at her before looking back down, her own smile peeking out. “Do you dream of me often?”Fade freezes, mind scrambling to grasp onto some kind of response.“I’m joking,” Neon laughs. She squeezes Fade’s hand once more before releasing it. “Thank you, Hazal.”It’s hours later after Fade has returned to her own room that she realizes it’s also the first time Neon called her by name.Varun is a welcomed addition to the Protocol. Fade is one of the first people to greet him when the group lands back at base after his escape. After weeks spent keeping on his trail—a bigger challenge than she expected—she wants to see the product of her work. Plus, she can't say she isn't curious to meet the man just from what she heard about him during her few jobs with REALM. "Now it makes sense why I was suddenly caught after months of evading you all," Varun says when he catches sight of her standing off to the side, a grin growing on his face. Fade frowns. "You know me?""Eyletmez, right? Greaves mentioned a job you two did together once, said you might have been one of the best trackers he's worked with. He wanted to try to hire you permanently." If only he had tried. Hazal would've loved to see the look on his face when she'd turn him down, no matter the amount of money he would have offered."Unfortunately for him, I don't do teams." Varun makes a show of looking around the hangar slowly before his gaze lands back on her. "This is a rare exception,” she mutters."Catching up is going to have to wait," Brimstone says, walking over to them. "We need to debrief everyone, and-" He claps a hand on Varun's shoulder. "-we need to get your paperwork done.""Joining up, then?" Fade asks. Varun shrugs. "Thought I could use a change of pace. Plus, this is probably the safest place to be right now. I doubt Greaves is going to suddenly let me go free."It's what they wanted, of course. The whole point of this operation was to get Varun on board. But she's glad he seems enthusiastic about it rather than feeling he's being held at gunpoint with no other option. “So how’d they get you?” Varun—officially Harbor, now—asks later when they’re in the kitchen eating the leftovers from dinner earlier. “Don’t tell me you joined willingly.” Fade raises an eyebrow. “Why is that so hard to believe?”“You could be making triple of however much you’re being paid right now. And I’m sure they don’t let you all out much, do they?”True enough. “It’s a long story,” Fade says, stabbing at a potato on her plate. “And not a great one, really.”  Harbor leans back in his chair, arms crossed over his chest. “I have the time if you do.” Fade is twenty-four when she dies.When she opens her eyes, it’s to Sage and Skye standing over her, both with varying levels of concern. Neon is next to her with a hand on her back, helping her up and looking everywhere but at Fade. “You’ll feel nauseous for a couple hours,” Sage says as Fade gets to her feet. “And you might feel some pain from where you were shot. I’m sorry, it’s not an easy thing to recover from even when the kill is clean.”It’s all very clinical. She’s never actually witnessed Sage resurrect someone herself, although she’s been on a few missions where she heard someone call in a death. Fade doesn’t know what exactly she expected the process to be, but it wasn’t for it to be so…routine.“Let me know if you need anything, alright?” Skye says, lightly squeezing her shoulder. All she can do is nod. Neon tucks herself closer, maneuvering Fade so that she’s leaning most of her weight on her. A fist clenches the fabric of her shirt, twisting the material like Neon is afraid she’ll disappear if she doesn’t hold on tight enough.Fade watches her, mind still foggy from either the resurrection or blood loss she isn’t sure. “Are you okay?” she asks quietly.Neon’s jaw visibly clenches, gaze still fixed straight ahead. “I’m fine.” That’s all either of them say on the matter.Eventually, Fade’s avoidance of sleep catches up to her. She can’t entirely blame her radiance for being the cause this time, although there have been some dreams recently that have kept her up trying to understand what they mean. It’s been worse ever since she died. One mistake, and if she’d been anywhere else with anyone else, that would’ve been it. Years spent searching and struggling all for it to end up meaning nothing.When her parents died, Hazal had been more angry about how unfair it all was rather than at whoever the culprit may have been. How was it fair that they paid the price for someone else’s mistake? That all it took was one single moment for them to be ripped away from her forever? How is it fair that there are people who have the privilege to think of death as nothing more than an inconvenience?It isn’t, never has been, and it didn’t take long at all for Hazal to understand that’s just how the world is. Cypher brings it up during their weekly game of chess. She's been struggling to keep her eyes open for the past hour and it's extended their game far longer than any they've played before."Fade, perhaps we should go see Sage," Cypher offers cautiously, any interest in winning the game gone. It’s bold of him. Her insomnia is a topic that's been brought up before and Fade has shut down any conversation about it swiftly and brutally, but she doesn’t have any energy left to snap at him.She must pass out at some point because when she wakes again, there are several more figures in front of her she can’t entirely make out.Warm hands cup her face, tilting her head up. The contact tingles.“Fade, we’re going to move you, okay?” All she manages is a grunt, leaning into the touch. She can’t remember the last time someone had treated her with such gentleness. She can’t remember the last time she felt like she deserved it. She’s in and out after that. There’s a solid presence on either side all but carrying her. Eventually, she’s eased down onto a bed, a blanket pulled over her, and Fade finally loses the fight to stay awake."I'm fine," Fade snaps, leaning away when Sage reaches out a hand. Sage doesn't react but does lower her hand, the faint blue glow around it fading to nothing again. "I've been dealing with it by myself for years now-""But you weren't alone," Sage cuts her off, gaze piercing, keeping Fade in place by the intensity. "You had someone to help you until you didn't. Your brother, correct?" Any retort that may have been forming slips away, and Fade is left staring.Sage sighs. "We can help you, Fade. If you allow us to." "I'm not..." Going to be here much longer , she means to say but the rest of the words gets stuck, throat tightening for a reason she doesn't understand. It doesn't matter, though. From the way Sage softens, she must already know what Fade was going to say."You could stay," Sage says, offering a small smile. It’s easy in moments like these to understand some of the other agents’ attachment to her. A steady presence in the midst of all the chaos. "You have people here that care about you whether you want them to or not. It's not a bad thing to allow yourself to care about them in return." Maybe.Maybe, but not yet.The first week and a half of her leave is spent working through her backlog of books to read and reaching out to her contacts on the off chance there's been anything new. There never is, of course. Fade has grown to accept she won't get any answers on this world.The sound of someone calling out her name—her  real name—has her shooting up, head whipping around to find the source. Three figures are quickly approaching the spot on the beach she’s set up on and it takes no time at all to recognize the blue and yellow streak rushing towards her. Fade barely has any time to brace herself before Neon slams into her. The force of the hug has her stumbling back with a grunt, arm instinctively wrapping around Neon to stop them from falling. Like running into a brick wall, except the wall came to her instead.The scent of ozone that always lingers around Neon assaults her senses. Combined with the impact, it takes several seconds for Fade to reorient herself."Ease up, Neon," Jett calls out, barely concealed laughter in her voice. “Fade is already one bad fall away from snapping in half.”They both ignore her. Neon pulls away, just enough to be able to look up at Fade. "Hi," she says, beaming and eyes bright. "I missed you."Fade can't decide if she wants to scream or jump into the ocean.She wants to run as far away as she can from this. She wants to grab Neon by the shoulders and shake her to try and get answers to all the questions that have been on constant repeat in her head for months now.  What do you see that I can’t?  Fade wants to ask.  Don’t you remember the damage I can do? Don’t you understand I only bring bad luck?  She wants to keep her as close as possible. She wants more nights back at base to learn more about Neon because no matter how much she seems to discover, it’s never enough.For the first time in years, Hazal  wants . She's never felt so off balanced in her life. The worst part is she isn't entirely upset about it.She must be silent for too long. Neon’s smile falters, and the arms around Fade loosen their grip."I'm sorry, I know we're intruding on your vacation. If you want us to leave-"It's terrifying that Neon leaving is the absolute last thing she wants.  "It's fine," Fade mutters. She tightens her own hold on Neon, just enough to reassure her that it’s okay. Her unoccupied hand gets stuffed deep in her pocket, nails digging into her palm to keep from reaching out any more.When Fade glances off to the side, she locks eyes with Jett who's watching them with a knowing smirk. Sage does a better job of hiding her own curiosity but even she looks a bit confused at the scene.  Fade turns back, reluctantly retracting her arm and takes a step back. "How was your trip?" Neon launches into a story about a shopping spree she and Jett dragged Sage on, keeping close to Fade’s side and it’s almost enough to replace the warmth lost from the embrace.Fade is twenty-five when she finally admits to herself maybe her time in the Protocol is starting to mean something."You want to run a mission with Harbor?"Fade almost feels embarrassed at the request with how incredulous Viper sounds.She's caught her in the middle of the night, a rare occasion where the two of them ran into each other during their respective nighttime habits. She isn't sure why the idea has stuck with her for the past few days; maybe to see if running with someone who worked the same jobs she did would be familiar. Comforting, even, to feel some semblance of what her normal was prior to joining, as stupid as it sounds. She shifts on her feet, gripping the mug she's holding tighter. The coffee is still hot enough to sting her skin through the ceramic. "I figured it could be a good chance to branch out," Fade explains lamely. “To get some experience working with other agents.”Having space from Neon to clear her head after the last few weeks is an added bonus too, but she doubts that's something Viper would take kindly to.For a long moment, Viper just stares at her, nail tapping slowly against her mug. Fade wishes the woman wasn’t a stone wall when it comes to displaying her emotions, if only so she can know what it is that’s going through her head right now.“Fine,” Viper says. “One mission for now. We’ll see how it goes before deciding to assign the two of you together in the future.”In theory, the task they’re given should be easy enough with their combined skill sets, honed from their time working for REALM and Fade's countless other jobs. Somehow, though, they end up needing emergency evac in the middle of the water near Breeze with almost a dozen crates of radianite floating around them. It's the first time in her life Hazal has ever failed a mission. Worse than failed, the whole thing is a catastrophic mess. She should be upset, p@ss@d at the thought of the debrief that awaits her back at base where they'll have to walk through all their mistakes. But despite being soaked to the bone and missing a shoe, Harbor is laughing when KAY/O lugs them onto the VLT/R. She's not any better, knows the remnants of her makeup is running down her face in a way that makes her look like a drowned raccoon. In contrast to the extra weight from her soaked gear, Fade feels lighter than she has in years. Fade is twenty-six when the tension that's been building between her and Neon for over a year finally snaps.She shouldn't be surprised—isn't entirely when it happens. They've just landed back at base after being deployed to defend a site. Slightly more than either of them had anticipated, but nothing too taxing. Fade gets up, finally able to stretch her back after having to sit for the hours-long ride home. She's turning to walk out when she realizes Neon isn’t following. "What’s wrong?" Fade asks, doing a quick scan over in case she's missed an injury.Neon holds up her hands. They're trembling, sparking every few seconds, and angry red burns decorate the skin. An unfortunately familiar sight whenever she’s forced to expend more energy than she should on missions. "Just waiting until it stops," Neon says with a tired smile. "You can go on ahead."Fade doesn't move. Instead, she clears her throat, looking towards the hangar’s entrance then back at Neon. "Actually, I have something for you."Neon watches her curiously as Fade crouches down in front of her, reaching into the inner pocket of her jacket to pull out the tube she's been carrying for several days now and had almost completely forgotten about until now. Fade holds out her hand for Neon's who gives it easily, turning it so the palm is facing up. With her other hand, she pops open the cap of the tube and squeezes out a small amount of gel."I found it when I was out in Egypt with Astra and Harbor the other week. The guy said it's made to treat radianite-related burns, stronger than the stuff we usually use,” Fade explains as she spreads it across the skin. They didn't face anything today that required Neon to use much of her radiance, but their last one earlier in the week had taken a lot from her. The burns still haven't healed completely, and Fade is sure today’s mission only aggravated the wounds further. It takes her a minute to realize Neon has gone completely silent. "You got this for me," she finally says, staring down at Fade with an expression she can’t decipher.Fade nods. She didn't think it would be a big deal when she bought it at the time, but Neon's reaction has her second-guessing. "And you've kept it on you this whole time."Another nod. Neon doesn't say anything more. Her eyes keep moving between Fade, the item in hand, and the hand she's holding. Regret hits her like a blow to the gut. It was a stupid decision, too presumptuous of her when she knows Neon hates bringing attention to the side-effects of using her powers. Fade goes to stand up, looking everywhere but at the woman in front of her."Pardon, I shouldn't have presumed-"The rest of her sentence is cut off when a hand touches her cheek and soft lips land on hers.It’s short, barely more than a light peck, and Fade has no time to do or think anything before Neon is pulling back.  “Was that okay?” Neon asks, bottom lip caught between her teeth and cheeks slightly flushed.It takes a few seconds for her mind to catch up with what just happened. She waits for the inevitable feeling of panic to start to take over, the anxiety at having revealed too much of herself too soon. Nothing comes, though, and Fade is left feeling steadier than she has in years. She wets her lips, the corner of her mouth twitching when she catches the way Neon tracks the motion. “Maybe once more to make sure,” she says, and the smile that blooms across Neon’s face makes her chest ache. This time, Fade meets her halfway, dropping the ointment in favor of reaching up to cup the back of Neon's neck. "You really are a softy," Neon says, laughing when they pull apart, still close enough that Fade can feel the breath of her words. “And to think a year ago I thought you were scary. You're starting to lose your-"This time, Fade is the one to cut her off.She doesn't know how long they stay there. It's long enough for her knees to start to ache, and for someone to find them, though. "This is quite possibly the worst place for you two to do this." Viper's voice has them jerking apart. Fade barely stops herself from completely falling back on her ass.  "We weren't- I mean-" Neon's mouth snaps shut when Viper raises a hand, cutting her off."The less you say, the better," she says. "But get out of the hangar if you plan on continuing." It's only when Neon jumps to her feet and grabs Fade's hand does she finally move. She's pulled up to her feet with ease and it's not the vertigo that makes her dizzy by the action. Viper watches them as they walk by, expression unchanging."Neon." The woman in question freezes. "Go see Sage to get those burns checked out. It's been too long since the last time you did." Neon mutters an affirmative, dragging Fade away faster."You seem lighter," Cypher observes a week later. "Rested, even.""Hm," is all Fade offers in response.She should have known what Cypher was up to when he chose to host their game today in the training room for a reason. Today, when Reyna has reserved the area for training with the duelists. She tries to focus on the board as something explodes behind her, followed by screaming that sounds suspiciously like Phoenix—all audible somehow through the thick layers dividing the room. A few minutes later, the doors open and a trail of agents file out of the room in various states of disarray. It’s a losing battle, Fade has come to learn, to try and not immediately search out Neon. No matter her efforts, inevitably she’ll find her and this time is no different. She’s one of the last out, sweaty and out of breath but laughing at something Jett says as they make their way towards the lockers. "I see." Cypher’s voice, sounding far too pleased, pulls her attention away, and despite not being able to see his face, Fade knows he's smiling. @ssh@l@.She knocks a rook off the side of the board in retaliation and doesn't feel any guilt when she hears it crack on impact. Hazal is twenty-six when she leaves behind a home for the second time. The majority of her possessions are still in her apartment in Istanbul. She’s been back occasionally over the years since leaving, but for the most part she’s been sending money to Esma from next door to take care of the cats and let her know if anyone somehow breaks in.“It’s very you,” is what Tala says after she’s finished examining the place. Fade wonders what it is she sees for her to say that. If it’s the stacks of books she left on the kitchen table when she was deciding which of them to bring with her the first time, or the mess of notes she never got around to organizing on her desk. Whether the collection of plants on the window sill is a surprise or if it’s just something that fits alongside everything else Neon has of her. How strange it is to once again have someone in her life who knows her in so many different ways. Neon practically squeals when she spots something behind Fade. She doesn’t need to turn around to know what it is that’s caught her attention. The quiet purring that starts up is enough. She leaves Neon to entertain herself with the cat, moving to the desk to start emptying it out. She’ll end up trashing mostly everything she’s sure. Nothing she has here is relevant any longer. "She kind of looks like you, Hazal."Neon is holding the cat up in front of her when Fade looks back, smile growing as she looks between the two of them. "Identical," she teases when Fade levels her an unimpressed look. “What’s her name?” Fade opens her mouth, then closes it when she realizes she doesn’t actually have an answer. “Well, I’m not sure.” Neon looks affronted. “You didn’t name her? What kind of pet owner are you?”“She’s not really mine.” “Uh huh, and that’s why she’s in your apartment, right?”“I don't actually know how she got in,” Fade says, frowning. “I left her with Esma when I joined, she shouldn’t be here.” “Maybe she missed you,” Neon says, cradling the cat close to her chest. “How long has it been since you were last here?” Over a year, now that she’s thinking about it, and she couldn’t stay long the last time she visited. They had been chasing one lead after the other and it left them little free time, much less enough for a lengthy visit back home.It’s bittersweet that her first time back after so long is to pack up what she never bothered taking when she first joined the Protocol. Hazal had been so sure back then she’d be home in Istanbul after a few months, doing what she’d been doing for years already.But now all her clothes are in her closet back on base. The few things she still has left from her family have found a place in her room, her father’s old jacket now a permanent fixture on the back of her desk chair. The things that matter the most are already there. Everything left here is inconsequential. It doesn’t take long to finish packing up the remaining items. It comes out to just two boxes and Fade almost feels bad about the resources Brimstone will be wasting to ship them to base. Their last stop is next door so she can say her goodbyes.“ She disappears sometimes,”  Esma says, shaking her head fondly as Fade gently urges the cat back into the apartment. “  I should have known where she was going.”  “ It’s okay,  ” Fade says, chuckling. “  Call me if you need anything at all.” “You worry too much, I’ll be fine.” Esma nods at Neon who gives a shy wave in return. “She’s very beautiful. I’m happy for you, Hazal. Come back and visit once in a while.” Fade squeezes the hand tangled with hers. “She is, and I will. Thank you for all your help.” “You’re really not going to take your cat?” Neon asks once they’ve made it outside the building. She’s all but pouting, and Fade has to fight back a smile.“I don’t think a military base is the best place for her to be.” Fade says. “And I’m almost certain you’d eventually keep her for yourself.”“At least I would name her.”She rolls her eyes. “I could make you walk to the landing pad, you know.” “But you won’t,” Neon says, smug as she takes the helmet Fade passes over to her. “You like me too much to do that.”“I’m starting to regret it.” “Mhm, keep telling yourself that.” “Maybe I should have accepted Harbor and Skye instead when they offered,” Fade says, settling on the bike. She offers a hand back to help steady Neon as she follows after. “Would you really want one of them riding with you like this?”The mental image alone has her grimacing.  “That’s what I thought,” Neon says, smile evident in her voice as she wraps her arms tight around Fade’s middle. “Now can we go before KAY/O leaves without us? I think he’s still upset about the last time Jett and I made him wait back in Spain.”'
User: Summarize the chapter based on the content provided, ensuring to follow the set format and emphasize key aspects within the specified length.
User: Summarize the chapter based on the content provided, ensuring to follow the set format and emphasize key aspects within the specified length.
Assistant: