Write really overly-funny superhilarious comedy 17+ scooby-doo transcript based on my prompt: (but make it more funnier)

Thanks to Shaggy's bad navigation (as he was holding the map upside down), the gang get lost and wind up in an old west ghost town, Gold City, on a stormy night. They check into a guest ranch whose owner, Big Ben, is delighted to see them; it seems that he's had no guests for quite a spell. When the gang wonder about this, Ben's assistant, Hank, explains that it's on account of the "Miner Forty-Niner", the ghost of an old prospector who haunts the local mine searching for the last vein of gold. Hank tells them that at night, you can hear the mine moaning, calling for the miner. He's been scaring all the guests away—and Hank himself intends to light out soon.

With nothing else to do, the gang head into Gold City to look around. Initially, they don't find anything—though in the saloon Shaggy and Scooby are startled by what seems to be a ghost playing a piano but Velma tells them that it's not a ghost and that it's only an automatic player piano. Later Shaggy is frightened by a tree branch as well as Scooby Doo thinking that the Miner has got them—until they regroup at the hotel. There, Scooby is panicked by the appearance of the Miner in a two-way mirror and knocks over a cigar-store Indian, dislodging a map of Gold City with what appears to be a safe combination scribbled in the corner. Opening the hotel safe, they find a secret elevator which takes them down into the mine itself. After Shaggy causes a mishap with dynamite (which he'd mistaken for candles). They explore the mine and find that it's lit up by lanterns, then they hear a frightful moaning echoing through the mine. The Miner appears and disappears behind some doors and chases Scooby and Shaggy in a rail car. Fred also manages to accidentally scare Shaggy and Scooby, thanks to him falling into a room full of baking flour. But the pieces start to fall together when the gang follows a wire that leads them to a room containing a tape recorder, a microphone/loudspeaker set up which is what made the moaning. They also find jars of crude oil (which Shaggy mistakenly thought was chocolate syrup). With these, they lay a trap for the Miner.

While Shaggy imitates train noises over the microphone, Scooby pilots a rail car with a loudspeaker and flashlight attached, imitating a train dashing through the mine tunnel. He chases the Miner into and through a shack (while destroying the old shack in the process). The Miner's boots fall off to reveal stilts, and he is thus unmasked as Hank. The next day, Big Ben was surprised to learn that it was Hank who was scaring off his guests to force him out of business. Hank had discovered that the mine, though exhausted of gold, is sitting on an oil well, and subsequently dressed up as the Miner to scare off everyone so he could cheaply buy and exploit the land.

Big Ben asks the gang how Hank knew about the oil. Daphne starts by saying that Hank accidentally found the secret mine elevator in the old hotel safe, Velma continues that instead of finding gold, Hank discovered the oil, and Fred explains that Hank knew the exact location layed out on a map. Shaggy finishes by saying Hank then hid the map in the cigar store Indian for safe keeping. A disappointed Big Ben comments that he and Hank could have been partners. Fred agrees, saying instead of being rich, Hank is in jail. Shaggy wonders where Scooby is.

Scooby is seen using the stilts, used by Hank when impersonating the miner, to nab some apples from a tree. Fred yells at Scooby to watch out for a gopher hole. It's too late, as Scooby steps into the gopher hole, loses his balance and falls into a water trough. Scooby ends the episode saying his name, and Shaggy concludes that one of the apples better be for him.