read it and write thing to implement and reasons and some small exaples Attitude
IS
Everything

Change Your Attitude … Change Your Life!

JEFF KELLER

This book is dedicated to my wife, Dolores, for believing in me and encouraging me to follow my dreams.
CONTENTS

Introduction

The Night That Changed My Life
Part 1: Success Begins in the Mind

Lesson 1

Your Attitude Is Your Window to the World
Lesson 2

You’re a Human Magnet
Lesson 3

Picture Your Way to Success!
Lesson 4

Make a Commitment and You’ll Move Mountains
Lesson 5

Turn Your Problems into Opportunities
Part 2: Watch Your Words

Lesson 6

Your Words Blaze a Trail
Lesson 7

How Are You?
Lesson 8

Stop Complaining!
Part 3: Heaven Helps Those Who Act

Lesson 9

Associate with Positive People
Lesson 10

Confront Your Fears and Grow
Lesson 11

Get Out There and Fail
Lesson 12

Networking That Gets Results
Conclusion

Change Your Attitude and You Change Your Life
Acknowledgments

About the Author

Copyright

INTRODUCTION

The Night That Changed My Life

The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind.
—WILLIAM JAMES
In 1980, I graduated from law school and thought I’d be a lawyer for the rest of my life. After all, that’s what I’d wanted to do since my early teenage years.

At first, everything went according to plan. After lots of studying that summer, I passed the Bar Examination and was admitted to practice law in New York. My personal life was also on the upswing. In early 1981, I married Dolores, a law school classmate. I was on my way to much success and happiness.

Or so I thought.

But, after practicing law for a few years, I realized I wasn’t happy at all.

Sure, there were some things I liked about being a lawyer. I enjoyed helping people resolve their disputes, especially when I could save them the agony of lengthy court proceedings.

Yet, there were so many things about being an attorney that I disliked—and that just seemed to drain the life out of me. Mounds and mounds of tedious paperwork and motions to be filed. Constant delays and postponements. It was not uncommon for a trial to be postponed 10 times.

I Dreaded Going To Work

I continued to grind out the work but grew more and more dissatisfied as an attorney. I was frustrated and very depressed. To put it bluntly, I didn’t like my life, and saw no way that things were going to improve.

Have you ever had a job where you dreaded going to work most days—where you felt the “weight of the world” on your shoulders each day?

Well, that’s how I felt. I was literally hunched over … and in pain, both physically and emotionally. I looked much older than my years. I began to get headaches all the time, and my stomach was constantly churning. Fearing that I had some serious health problem, I saw some doctors and they ordered a battery of tests. Every test came back with the same result—they couldn’t find anything physically wrong with me. One of the doctors suggested that I take Maalox to calm my upset stomach.

Spiritually, I was dead. Nothing in my life had much meaning. This day-to-day drudgery was also affecting my appearance. Although I was in my late 20s, I looked like I was 40!

In the early part of 1985, shortly after I had turned 30 years old, I was burned out. And, one particular evening, while sitting alone in my den, I knew that something had to change. Not knowing what to do, I simply said out loud,

“There’s got to be more to my life than this … there’s got to be more than this misery and unhappiness.”

Help Comes From An Unlikely Source

Later that night, I was watching TV in the den. It was around 1:00 am, and my wife, Dolores, had already gone to bed. But I was feeling so down I couldn’t sleep. I “channel surfed” looking for something to occupy my time. I tuned in to, of all things, an infomercial.

Normally, I would have changed that channel in a fraction of a second, but for some reason, I listened.

The product being peddled was called The Mental Bank and was endorsed by actress Florence Henderson of Brady Bunch fame. The Mental Bank was a home-study course that explained how everything we achieve in life is based upon our subconscious beliefs.

You are not what you think you are. But what you think — YOU ARE!
— Dr. Norman Vincent Peale
I felt so desperate at that point that I decided to go for it. I pulled out my credit card and ordered the program.

That night in my den was the turning point of my life.

By the way, when I sheepishly told Dolores what I had done a day or two later, she was shocked.

“You did what?” she asked in amazement. It’s not that she objected to the purchase—it was just so out of character for me to buy something like that on impulse … and worse yet, from a TV infomercial!

Several days later, The Mental Bank program arrived at my doorstep. And I was fascinated and excited to begin learning how our thoughts determine the quality of our lives. Prior to that time, I had never heard these ideas. Unfortunately, they don’t teach you this stuff in school!

The Mental Bank program spurred me to seek out other motivational resources. I began to read books by Napoleon Hill, Og Mandino, Norman Vincent Peale and Robert Schuller. I started reading the Bible on a regular basis. And I eagerly listened to inspiring audio programs by Zig Ziglar, Earl Nightingale, Jim Rohn, Bob Proctor and many others. I felt like a person who had wandered for days in the desert with a parched throat … and then suddenly found a stream of water!

Now, I can’t tell you that everything in my life changed overnight, because it didn’t happen that way. But, from the moment I began to change from a negative attitude to a positive attitude, I started to get significant results.

I felt better. I had more energy. And I started to achieve goals that I would never have accomplished before … all because of a change in my attitude! I’m also happy to report that when people now ask how old I am … and I say 57, they invariably reply, “You look much younger!”

It’s all in the attitude.

From Lawyer To Motivational Speaker

I continued my self-study program in my spare time, while I worked full time as a lawyer. The positive thinking was helping my attitude at work, but I felt a passion for my “hobby” that I never felt for my work, and I dreamed about the day I could walk away from my job.

In 1989, after four years of intensive research about attitude and motivational concepts, I agreed to present some adult education seminars in the evenings at a local high school. I was to be paid $30 for each two-hour class. Not the kind of money that lets you quit your day job!

Never underestimate your power to change yourself.
— H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
As I stood in front of the class to start my first seminar, I was petrified. My heart was pounding and I was sweating. But somehow I managed to muster the courage to just do it. The students loved the class, and I got a real adrenaline rush from presenting the material that had revolutionized my own life … and that had the power to do the same for others!

I was on my way.

Eventually, the speaking fees grew a little larger, and in 1990, I decided to phase out my law career over the next few years. This wasn’t a simple decision. I had gone to four years of college and three years of law school to obtain my law degree. On top of that, I had spent 10 years of my life as a practicing lawyer. When you have that much invested in a career, it’s not so easy to walk away.

Then, of course, there was the money issue. As a lawyer, I was on track to earn $100,000 in a few years, and I’d be earning that much—and more—for the rest of my professional career.

Taking A Stand

Although I was earning a little more income from my new “hobby,” I realized that I’d have start-up expenses in launching my new enterprise. Fortunately, Dolores and I had saved some money over the years. To supplement my income, I began to sell a line of merchandise with my unique “Attitude is Everything” logo. But there was no way to avoid it—I’d have to take a huge financial step backward to start my new business … at least in the beginning.

A positive attitude is a person’s passport to a better tomorrow.
— Unknown
And yet, it was time to move on. I felt as if I was being pulled out of the legal profession and into my new career. Whenever I spoke to an audience or wrote a motivational essay, I was so invigorated and full of life. I knew that’s where I belonged.

So, I made a gradual transition—working four days a week as a lawyer, then three days a week … and then two days a week … until, in 1992, I began working full time as a motivational speaker and writer.

Trust me, my mother wasn’t thrilled when I told her that I was giving up the practice of law to speak about attitude. After all, it doesn’t carry the prestige of saying “My son is a lawyer!”

But these are issues you have to deal with when you take a stand in life. You have to face the fact that some people will disapprove of your decision. I also learned that you often have to let go of some things in your life and take a few steps backward before you can move forward in a new direction. Part of the price I had to pay was giving up the money, prestige and security of my legal career.

By the way, as it turned out, my mother became very supportive of my new career, especially when she saw that I was making progress—and that I really enjoyed my work.

Why am I telling you all this about my career transition? It’s not to impress you with what I’ve done. Believe me, I’ve made plenty of blunders and mistakes along the way.

I’m sharing my story because I want you to know how drastically my life changed—and how much better it got—when I made a change in my attitude.

Proof positive that, indeed, attitude is everything!

How You’ll Benefit From This Book

Some final thoughts before we launch right into this material: This book can help you, no matter how positive or negative you are right now.

If you’re negative, don’t despair. You can use these concepts to develop and maintain a positive attitude … and to achieve incredible breakthroughs in your life.

If you’re already a positive person, you can use these principles to soar to even greater heights of success and fulfillment.

Think, act and talk with enthusiasm and you’ll attract positive results.
— Michael LeBoeuf
I’ve spent more than 20 years researching why it is that some people succeed while others achieve disappointing results. During that time, I’ve read a few hundred books and thousands of magazine articles on attitude and success. I’ve listened to more than 3,000 hours of audio programs. In addition, I’ve interviewed countless high achievers to learn their “success secrets.”

More importantly, I have personally applied each and every success strategy that is described in this book. So, I know from firsthand experience that these ideas work—and that they have the power to literally transform your life!

Please don’t misunderstand me. I don’t claim to be a “know-it-all” on these subjects. Far from it. I consider myself a “work in progress” and I continue to learn every day.

However, I know what it’s like to have a negative attitude, because that’s the kind of attitude I had for the first 30 years of my life. I know what it’s like to doubt yourself and your abilities, because that’s what I did for 30 years. All of the positive changes that I’ve made in my life are the result of practicing the principles you’ll read about in this book.

Think … Speak … Act

This book is conveniently divided into three Parts, and each Part contains a series of lessons. So, if you ever need reinforcement in a particular area, it will be easy for you to turn to that lesson and re-read it.

In Part 1, Success Begins in the Mind, we’ll be focusing on the power of attitude and belief to shape your destiny. You’ll learn how your success initially depends on the way that you THINK.

In Part 2, Watch Your Words, we’ll concentrate on the way that you SPEAK … how your attitude is reflected in your words … and how positive language can help to propel you toward your goals.

In Part 3, Heaven Helps Those Who Act, we’ll cover the final leg of our journey. Even if you think positively … and speak positively … you won’t achieve your dreams until you ACT. You can’t sit back and just expect success to pay you a visit. In this section, you’ll learn the action steps that will turn your dreams into reality.

When you THINK, SPEAK and ACT in ways that support your success, you’re firing on all cylinders … and on the way to achieving phenomenal results in your life.

You’re about to embark on a journey that will bring you success and happiness beyond your wildest dreams, so let’s get started….

PART 1

Success Begins in the Mind

Success is a state of mind. If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success.
— DR. JOYCE BROTHERS
LESSON 1

Your Attitude Is Your Window to the World

Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world.
— GEORGE BERNARD SHAW
It was just after 1:00 pm and Sara was getting hungry. She had put in a few productive hours of work at her desk and decided to get a bite to eat at a nearby coffee shop.

A few minutes later, Sam walked into the coffee shop. He, too, was on his lunch break. Sam sat down at a table a few feet away from Sara.

The same waitress served Sara and Sam that afternoon. Each customer waited about the same amount of time before the waitress took the order. Each of them received their meal around the same time. Each of them was served well-prepared, wholesome food. And each waited the same amount of time for the waitress to deliver the check.

But that’s where the similarities ended.

Sara had walked into the coffee shop with a smile, a spring in her step and a very positive outlook on the world. It was plain for everyone to see. Her body language and her posture reflected her optimism. Sara had a delightful lunch, exchanged some pleasant conversation with the waitress, and went back to work with a re-charged battery.

Sam, on the other hand, had entered the coffee shop with a scowl on his face. He looked like he’d been sucking on sour pickles all morning. He was hunched over and tense. His body language cried out “Stay away from me!” He was annoyed when the waitress didn’t take his order immediately. He was annoyed at how long it took for his meal to arrive. He complained about the food, and was furious when he didn’t get his check right away.

Attitudes are a secret power working 24 hours a day, for good or bad.
— Unknown
Why did Sara and Sam have such different experiences in the coffee shop? Remember that each was treated in exactly the same way. It comes down to this: Sara sees the world with a positive attitude. Sam sees the world with a negative attitude.

A Definition Of Attitude

Think of your attitude as the mental filter through which you experience the world. Some people see the world through the filter of optimism (the glass being half full) while others see life through a filter of pessimism (the glass being half empty). Let me give you some examples to explain the difference between a positive attitude and a negative attitude.

 
The person with the negative attitude thinks “I CAN’T.”
The person with the positive attitude thinks “I CAN.”
The person with the negative attitude dwells on problems.
The person with the positive attitude concentrates on solutions.
The person with the negative attitude finds fault with others.
The person with the positive attitude looks for the good in others.
The person with the negative attitude focuses on what’s missing.
The person with the positive attitude counts his or her blessings.
The person with the negative attitude sees limitations.
The person with the positive attitude sees possibilities.
I could go on and on with examples, but I’m sure you get the idea. When I talk to audiences about attitude, I often like to use word pictures. They help people to understand and remember what I said. Let me paint this picture for you: Your attitude is your window to the world.

Everyone Starts With A Clean Mental Window

Let’s take a few moments to discuss why I say that your attitude is your window to the world. We all start out in life with a good attitude—or, should I say, a clean mental window. Just watch young children. They’re always laughing and giggling. They have a sunny disposition. They love to explore new things.

Consider the attitude of a child who’s learning to walk. When he stumbles and falls down, what does he do? I’ll tell you what he doesn’t do. He doesn’t frown or blame the carpet. He doesn’t point fingers at his mother or father for giving him lousy instructions. He doesn’t quit. Oh, no. He smiles, gets up again and makes another attempt. And another. He keeps going for weeks and weeks with a positive attitude until he gets it right! His window is squeaky clean, and he feels like he can conquer the world.

You can’t always control circumstances. But you can control your own thoughts.
— Charles Popplestone
But as you know, there comes a point where life starts throwing some dirt at our windows. And here’s what happens:

 
Our windows get splattered by criticism from parents and teachers.
Our windows get smudged by ridicule from peers.
Our windows get smeared by rejection.
Our windows get soiled by disappointments.
Our windows get clouded by doubt.
The problem is, the dirt keeps building up, and all too many people do nothing about it. They continue to go through life with a filthy window. They lose their enthusiasm. They get frustrated and depressed. And most tragically, they give up on their dreams—all because they failed to clean their attitude window.

That’s the road I was traveling down. I had a dirty window when I was an attorney. And the longer I stayed in that field, the filthier my window got. I saw no possibilities. How could I? My window was splattered with the mud of negativity.

Wash Your Window

But then, by the grace of God, I learned that all I had to do was clean off my window! I had to improve my attitude so I could see the world clearly again. After I removed the grime from my window, a whole new world opened up for me. The frustration and depression lifted. I had more confidence. For the first time in many years, I could see the magnificent possibilities that life had to offer.

And I was able to make a career transition and do work that I absolutely love. When you really think about it, I’m in the business of helping people to clean off their windows—to get a better attitude!

Do you see what I mean when I say that attitude is your window to the world? Can you appreciate how your attitude affects the way you see everything in your life? More importantly, are you beginning to see those areas where your window needs to be washed?

You Control Your Attitude

It’s your job to keep your window clean. Sure, I can give you a little encouragement. And other people can encourage you, too. But in the end, nobody else can do it for you.

You see, you always have a choice. You can leave the filth on your window and look at life through a smeared glass. But there are consequences to that approach—and they’re not very pretty. You’ll go through life negative and frustrated. You’ll be unhappy. You’ll achieve only a fraction of what you’re capable of achieving.

There’s a better way. When you choose to take out your squeegee and clean your window, life will be brighter and sunnier. You’ll be healthier and happier. You’ll set some ambitious goals … and begin to achieve them. Your dreams will come alive again!

Still doubting whether you really have the power to change your attitude? Perhaps you’re thinking, “Jeff, that’s easy for you to say. Your attitude wouldn’t be so good if you had my problems.”

Granted, some really devastating things may have happened to you. You may have endured much suffering. Perhaps you’re going through some tough times right now. But, even under the worst circumstances, I still contend that you have the power to choose your attitude. I’m not saying it’s easy. But the fact remains, the choice is yours.

There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.
— William Shakespeare
Let me tell you about a man who is well qualified to speak on the subject of attitude. His name is Dr. Viktor Frankl, and he went through hell on earth—and managed not only to survive … but to inspire millions of people. You see, Viktor Frankl endured years of horror as a prisoner in the Nazi death camps.

To make matters worse, his father, mother, brother and his wife died in camps or were killed in gas chambers. Every day, Frankl and the other prisoners suffered from hunger, cold and brutality. Can a person control his or her attitude in a situation like that? Here’s what Dr. Frankl had to say about the importance of attitude in his best-selling book, Man’s Search For Meaning:

Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way…. Even though conditions such as lack of sleep, insufficient food and various mental stresses may suggest that the inmates were bound to react in certain ways, in the final analysis it becomes clear that the sort of person the prisoner became was the result of an inner decision, and not the result of camp influences alone.
Now, if Dr. Frankl and the other prisoners had the ability to choose their attitudes in the face of such unspeakable suffering, who are we to claim that we cannot take control of our attitudes?

As Hugh Downs has said: “A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.” That’s a powerful statement—and it’s the truth.

When it’s all said and done, you, and you alone, control your attitude.

Attitude And Success

Okay, let’s say you clean off your window and develop a positive attitude. You’re smiling. You sit home and think positive thoughts. Will that alone lead you to outrageous success and the realization of your fondest dreams? No, it won’t … because there’s more to success than just having a great attitude.

A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.
— Hugh Downs
To maximize your potential and achieve your goals, you need to apply certain time-honored principles of success that have helped millions of people to achieve extraordinary results. And they’ll do the same for you!

In the next 11 lessons of this book, I’ll be taking you through these success principles, step by step. You’ll learn about confronting your fears, overcoming adversity, harnessing the power of commitment and much, much more. You’ll get the information and inspiration you need to start living the life you’ve always dreamed about.

Still, you may be wondering, what do these success principles have to do with attitude?

In a word—EVERYTHING! That’s why I say attitude is everything.

Without a positive attitude, you can’t activate the other principles. Your success in life begins and ends with your attitude.

It’s only when you clean your attitude window that the other success principles can shine through. If your window is smudged, only a fraction of the light of these principles can get through. Your success is limited, or even blocked.

But when you learn to keep your attitude window clear, the light comes pouring in and you can use these empowering principles to earn more money, have more satisfying relationships, increase your spiritual awareness and reach your full potential.

When you combine a positive attitude with the other success principles, you become unstoppable!