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Assistant: Title: A Thin Line
        Author: my99centdreams my99centdreams 
        Chapter: 1/1 
        Summary: Zoro leans in, his earrings swaying gently, “You still hate me?”Sanji swallows, going to take a hasty pull off his cigarette before realizing it had burned down to a stub. He flicks it into the ashtray by his elbow and pushes his hair out of his eyes. Finally, he laughs, a humorless exhausted sound, says, “You’re going to hurt.”
        Contents: Summary:
            
              Zoro leans in, his earrings swaying gently, “You still hate me?”Sanji swallows, going to take a hasty pull off his cigarette before realizing it had burned down to a stub. He flicks it into the ashtray by his elbow and pushes his hair out of his eyes. Finally, he laughs, a humorless exhausted sound, says, “You’re going to hurt.”
            
        

        
  Notes:





    
      first of all, this took me MONTHS to finish and here i am shocked that it didn't take even longer. this fic was a coping method for me and i poured my heart into it all my ugly nasty feelings as well as my soft tender ones. there are a few different things mentioned in here about sanji's past that are not canon as i've only just reached the part of one piece where they all got split up by kuma so everything else is a mystery to me. all that being said i pray you like this fic and that it is not a jumbled mess 😂 thank you for reading :).
    

    
        (See the end of the work for more notes.)
    



  





    
        
          Hating someone is the easiest thing Sanji’s ever done. To walk into a room with his spine stiff, anger and resentment coiling into an insidious knot inside his stomach, feels as natural as breathing. He keeps his actions and words short and to the point. No unnecessary conversation or eye contact. Absolutely no touching unless violence blooms at the end of it.In the beginning it’s fun in a way. Sanji’s always been angry; his body like a bruise, a catalyst to rage. Get too close, don’t get close enough, say something nasty, say something lovely, say anything at all and he’s liable to explode. He wasn’t born this way, but things happened. To him. Around him. Yelling and fighting becomes therapeutic and the only person who has ever come close to matching his level of viciousness is Zoro.Zoro with his eyes narrowed, glaring daggers at Sanji from across the room. His jaw ticking whenever Sanji so much as glances in his direction. Words are hissed and insults are spit from between clenched teeth with no remorse.Zoro with his fists clenched around the hilt of his sword, his expression menacing as he watches Sanji saunter about, waiting for a weakness that Sanji will never reveal.Zoro with blood dripping down his chest, a sharp grin on his face as he laughs at Sanji’s injuries. “This is the best the East Blue has to offer?”Their words stain and fester, spreading like cancer, and still Sanji craves more.They fight and they fight and they fight for what feels like an eternity. Was there a time when they didn’t hate each other? What would that even look like? Sanji’s heart is big and brittle and the only way he knows how to hold onto someone is to hate them. Love is fleeting and only convenient until it’s not anymore. He spent years with a man who saved his life and though the relationship was rooted in distrust and misplaced aggression it didn’t stay that way. But, where did it end up? He’s on a ship thousands of miles away with no idea if they’ll ever see each other again. The only way to hold onto a person is to hate them. Hate them so deep and hard you can’t go a day without thinking about them. So deep you don’t know who you would be without that hatred keeping you warm and sated at night.*
The first time they slip up they’re barely sober enough to remember it the next day. Stuck on an island until the log pose re-calibrates and it is nothing less than fate that brings them together in the dead of the night. Sanji’s drunk, f@ck@d up off of sweet liquor made from the fat mangoes the island is famous for and his blood’s running hot through his veins. At first he had started walking down side streets and alleys looking for a fight, hoping to run into someone thirsty for violence just like him, but was quickly derailed when he spotted Zoro stumbling along up ahead of him. He stops dead in his tracks, the only movement the wispy curl of his smoke as it floats about his face. He could turn down another street and Zoro would be none the wiser, but something about the way Zoro’s half slumped forward, the unsteady thump of his boots hitting the ground that jolts Sanji into moving toward him once more.“Hey,” he grunts. “You lost again?”Zoro stops walking, his head tipping forward as his shoulders raise in a defeated sigh, “Yes.”Sanji barks out a laugh as he walks around Zoro, but it instantly dies once they’re face to face. Reluctantly, he asks, “What the f@ck happened to you?”Upon closer inspection, Sanji can see that Zoro’s shirt is in tatters and streaked with red. His shoulder has a nasty gash that’s still leaking blood down his arm. His lip is cut up as well, a violet bruise blossoming high on his cheek.Zoro lifts his injured arm with a wince and brings a brown bottle to his lips, his eyes never straying from Sanji’s as he swallows, liquor trickling down his chin. Sanji can’t explain it, but something takes hold of him then. Just for a moment. He thinks about catching the drops of liquor sliding down Zoro’s throat with his tongue, wonders if Zoro would taste like the ocean or something far more sinister, like sharp metal and warm blood. He trembles just the slightest bit as desire surges through him, fierce and unrelenting. His cigarette burns down and the flame bites at his bottom lip, shaking him out of his stupor.“Got in a fight.”Sanji spits the cigarette out and pulls out another one, averting his gaze as Zoro licks at his bottom lip, “Looks like you lost.”Zoro shrugs his uninjured shoulder, “They’re dead.”“Well,” There’s blood speckled across Zoro’s forehead and Sanji feels something burst open deep inside of him. He tilts his head to the left, “The hotel is this way.”*The walk back to the hotel is slow and silent; Sanji smokes way too many cigarettes and Zoro derails them at some point by arguing about finding an open bar before officially calling it a night. Sanji had to swear on his best knife set that he’d personally escort Zoro to a bar after he’s been bandaged up in order to keep Zoro from striking out on his own.Once back at the hotel Sanji leads Zoro to his room, his strides long and purposeful even as Zoro stumbles along behind him. Sanji uses his matches to light a few lanterns, their shadows licking up the walls as Zoro sheds his shirt slowly. The room consists of a single lumpy bed and a bathroom that’s seen better days. Sanji finds himself straightening the covers on the bed because he doesn’t know if Zoro actually wants Sanji to get his hands on him in the name of healing or not.Zoro rolls his eyes and grumbles, “You gonna fix me up or not?”Sanji briefly thinks about jamming his fingers into the open wound on Zoro’s shoulder.Instead, Sanji patches him up with care, his fingers nimble and efficient in their mission as Zoro stares up at him the entire time like Sanji’s face is suddenly the most interesting thing he’s ever seen in his life. It grates on his nerves and makes his cheeks turn red which only serves to make him angrier. And it’s not that he wants Zoro to get any funny ideas about this; Sanji’s only helping him because that’s what he does. He takes care of people and he’s good at it. He’s made a whole career out of it for f@ck’s sake. Still, the way Zoro’s eyes flutter shut as Sanji drags a washcloth over his bl@@dy face and body makes a lump form in Sanji’s throat. His lips are parted, his breathing slow and even as he tilts his face up for Sanji’s attentions. Sanji’s hands slow, stretching the moment out longer than is necessary, but something in him has cracked open at the thought of Zoro yearning for someone to just be gentle with him for once, to treat him with tender adoration rather than fear.Finally, after Zoro has been thoroughly cleaned and no longer smells of copper and distilled fruit, Sanji locates the needle and thread he keeps for mending his suits, gets on his knees, and sets to work. The room is silent, the only noise the pained huff of Zoro breathing through Sanji’s stitching. Just as Sanji’s racing heart begins to calm itself and he allows his mind to drift to more banal subjects like his grocery list, Zoro wrenches him back into the present the second Sanji finishes dressing the gash on his shoulder. Zoro’s fingers are hot and trembling as they both anchor Sanji to the spot and coax him to tip his head back.Sanji’s breath catches in his throat, his heart pounds wildly, and he’s looking at Zoro’s bruised up face and battered body and something in him screams. It’s different this time. The moment doesn’t lapse as soon as it began; it lingers and Zoro’s fingers trace along the delicate line of his cheekbone, making Sanji shiver. His eyes are heavy, but they lock onto Sanji’s with a clarity and vulnerability that leaves Sanji clenching his fists in his lap to hide their tremors.Sanji swallows, his mouth suddenly dry, asks, “What are you-”Zoro’s mouth is on his before he can finish his sentence. It’s devastating; their noses smash together and the cut on Zoro’s lip instantly opens up once again. It’s disgusting. But, Sanji feels like he’s shattering into a million pieces and can’t quite remember how to stop clutching at Zoro’s arm or how to stop parting his lips to finally find out what Zoro tastes like. The kiss goes on and on, their mouths coming together again and again as if they were old friends rather than complete and utter strangers. It takes more time than it should, but eventually Sanji gets his hands between them and shoves Zoro away from him. Both of them are panting and when Sanji licks his bottom lip he tastes blood.Zoro lets out a pained whimper as he watches, his eyes dark with a burning intensity that makes Sanji want to crush their bodies together again. A thousand different thoughts careen wildly inside his mind; a thousand different things to say that would twist the open, wanting expression on Zoro’s face into one of closed off, barely concealed hatred.“This isn’t - we’re not - I don’t-” Sanji tries, the words coming out rushed and harsh before trickling off into uncertainty. What the f@ck is wrong with him?“We could,” Zoro says, like it’s that easy. Like Sanji hasn’t tried kicking his skull in a hundred different times while dodging a sword intent on slitting open his throat.“No,” Sanji shakes his head vehemently. “F@ck, no.”Zoro stays silent and merely looks at him. He looks at him like he’s memorizing every f@ck@ng centimeter of his face; he looks at him like he doesn’t know what the word hate means. He knows he should get up off the floor and leave Zoro behind, but he feels rooted to the spot. Something unexplainable is happening to him. Zoro’s hands, calloused and deadly, tuck a stray lock of Sanji’s hair behind his ear before cupping his jaw like he would a hand full of rose petals. “I’ve been a lot of places in my life. Met a lot of people,” he whispers. “Nobody feels like you.”It’s like a dam has broken open inside of him, the sudden rush of emotion is so thick and heady all he can do is grab onto Zoro’s hand and close his eyes. Sanji’s voice is thick when he chokes out, “I hate you.”“Do you?”“Yes,” Sanji hisses.Zoro slides off the wooden edge of the tub and draws Sanji even closer to him. Sanji doesn’t know why he allows it, but he does, and soon they’re holding each other, Sanji’s hands clutching desperately at Zoro’s bare back. A soft moan escapes from somewhere deep inside his chest and he feels embarrassment heat the back of his neck even as his d@ck fills out in his pants. Without warning, Zoro turns his head and presses an open mouthed kiss to the spot just below Sanji’s ear; shivers race their way across his body before his mind can even process what happened.Again, Zoro asks, “Do you hate me?”Sanji squeezes his eyes shut tight and digs his nails into Zoro’s back, his voice cracks, “Yes.”Leisurely, Zoro trails a hand down to Sanji’s ass, tracing circles on his back the whole way down. Suddenly, Zoro tightens his grip and pulls Sanji into him, their d@cks rubbing together through their pants and begs, “Show me how much.”Zoro’s voice sounds like Sanji’s when he’s had four too many cigarettes after polishing off a bottle whose contents more closely resembled lamp oil than liquor and for a brief moment Sanji wonders what it would be like to let everything go. He thinks it’d feel good to just let the storm that’s been brewing inside of him for months finally reach its climax and unleash its devastation on Zoro, but he can’t.Zoro’s chest is rising and falling rapidly against his own and he squeezes his eyes shut tight as he turns his head into the crook of Zoro’s neck. He breathes in the hot, clean scent of him. One breath, two breaths.He pulls away, detangles himself from Zoro and gets up off the floor in order to put space between them. Zoro stares up at him, his arms dangling by his sides, the flush of arousal slowly disappearing as something like disappointment takes its place.The silence between them is stifling and uncomfortable, but still they let it linger.Finally, his voice ragged, Zoro asks, “Why?”Sanji rolls his eyes, suddenly angry that Zoro doesn’t get it. “We do this and then what? Huh?”Zoro shrugs, “Whatever happens next.”Sanji laughs, a cruel and insulting sound, “What happens next is we lose control. We f@ck each other up. Maybe we f@ck the whole crew up. Six months from now or eight islands from now something big happens and we realize we can’t ever go back to what we were before. One of us gets off the ship and never comes back. That’s what you want?”The disappointed glint in Zoro’s eyes turns into sadness as the left corner of his mouth turns down. His hands lay on his lap, his palms open like an offering. “It doesn’t have to be that way, Sanji.”Sanji glares at him, his whole body clenching up, “That’s how it always is. People leave. They act like relationships and moments in time can be stretched out forever, but they can’t. You know what’s forever? Hatred. Grudges. Don’t ever forget that.”*Time passes and Sanji smothers the memory of what happened that night in the bathroom. In the beginning, the memory is persistent, but so is Sanji and by the time they reach a particularly welcoming cl@ster of islands he’s calmed a bit. He runs laps around the islands’ marketplaces, restaurants, and forests in search of new foods and recipes until exhaustion finally claims him late one night and he decides to take a day of rest.Treating himself to one of the more expensive restaurants in town definitely still counts as rest he decides. He slings his jacket over his shoulder, unfastens the top two buttons on his shirt, and rolls his sleeves up a little. He checks his pockets for his cigarettes and money and decides he feels okay today. The stupid sh@t that happened the other night hasn’t changed him in the slightest. He’s fully in control and will be sure to stay that way.As he’s disembarking Zoro calls out to him, “Where you going? Thought you were staying in today.”“Going out,” he tosses over his shoulder not bothering to stop for even a second.“Yeah, @ssh@l@, I see that. I asked where?”“None of your business,” he seethes. Zoro says nothing in return, but Sanji can feel his eyes burning holes into his back as he continues on. An image of Zoro, all of his walls down, his eyes on Sanji as he pleaded with him to give in hits him then. It makes his stomach tighten painfully and he doesn’t know why he f@ck@ng cares, but he does. F@ck.He stops mid stride and runs a hand through his hair. For a minute he’s lost inside of another memory. The Baratie shrinking in the distance; Zeff turning away from him for the last time. Sanji drinking himself to sleep as the hole in his chest tore itself wider and wider each night until he became so used to the pain he simply stopped noticing it.It’s his day of rest, he thinks, he can give in for just one day. He says, “If you can find me you can join me.”*It doesn’t take Zoro nearly as long as Sanji thought it would. He’s already polished off an appetizer, an entree, and more than a few drinks, but hadn’t managed to order dessert yet. He honestly thought he’d have finished his dessert, paid his bill, and then begun searching for Zoro throughout town before the two would have managed to cross paths.Zoro plops down at Sanji’s table, leaning back with his arms behind his head looking like the picture of smugness. This island is hot and humid and Zoro’s shirt has been unbuttoned since the morning; the scar across his chest is thick and pink against the tan of his skin. He smirks, “Found you.”“And it only took you two hours,” Sanji rolls his eyes, pausing to light a cigarette. Zoro’s eyes track the movement of his fingers as he ignites the match, but linger on his mouth after Sanji rests his hands back on the table. “May I remind you this place is only about a ten minute walk from the shore.”Zoro shrugs, “Why don’t you call the waiter over here and order for me.”Sanji raises an eyebrow in disbelief, “You want me to order for you?”“You know what I like.”Sanji does. He flags the waiter down a moment later and orders shioyaki salmon with white rice and nori along with a bottle of sake. The sake arrives quickly and Zoro flashes a smile at him as he pours himself a shot. Something inside of Sanji begins to sing and he doesn’t know what the f@ck he’s feeling right now, but it’s making him nervous. He takes another drag off his cigarette and says, “Wow, I never thought I’d see the day you use a glass. What happened? Drinking out of the bottle not as fun anymore?”Zoro snorts, but doesn’t rise to the bait. “I know how to act in public, Sanji.”“Weird, I’ve only ever seen you behave like a neanderthal.”Zoro huffs out a laugh and something tense flashes through Sanji; when did their insults lose their sting?Something must show on his face because Zoro nudges his leg under the table and mumbles, “Relax, cook.”Sanji does the opposite just to be difficult; he keeps his back ramrod straight and angles his body further away from Zoro’s so he can’t touch him again. It’s petty and dramatic, but it’s all he has.*After Zoro finishes eating, Sanji avoids meeting his gaze until all of the shots start kicking in. His posture starts to droop as his eyes slide hungrily over Zoro’s relaxed body. He even stretches his legs out under the table and forgets to flinch when he bumps into Zoro.They start talking about the sea and the places they’ve been - both before and after meeting each other - and fighting. The conversation was stilted and mean at first, but now it’s easy and open. Sanji listens as Zoro tells him a story from his pirate hunting days and he keeps covering his mouth to stifle the loud laughter that breaks through. His cheeks are flushed red from the booze and Zoro has this stupid lopsided smile on his face and Sanji wonders if they could’ve been friends in another lifetime. Maybe one in which his father died when Sanji was born and his mother never turned away from him.He can’t help but think how one day Zoro will turn his back on Sanji for the last time as well. He tells himself it’ll happen no matter what. Whether they talk or f@ck or spend time together or not it’s still going to happen and that last little piece of brightness inside of him will be extinguished. He imagines how much it will hurt. He imagines spending the rest of his life hungry and aching. It’s sick, but a part of him wants it. He throws back a shot and turns to face Zoro. He’s handsome and big and confident and annoying and brave and insufferable and so many other things Sanji doesn’t even have the words for. He wants to open his mouth and tell Zoro all of these things, but he doesn’t. He thinks about a Wanted poster with both of their faces on it, a combined total of 200 million berries, and doesn’t immediately shut down the thought. Roronoa Zoro and Blackleg Sanji. Last spotted somewhere in the Grand Line. Exercise extreme caution. Where one goes the other is sure to follow. What would it feel like to be one half of a whole? What would it feel like to be so thoroughly entwined with another person that ZoroandSanji drips from the mouths of strangers without hesitation? What would it feel like to let love and devotion devour your soul until you can’t remember the searing pain of abandonment?He keeps his mouth firmly shut until the waitress brings another round of shots. He throws his back quickly, lighting up a cigarette before the burn in his throat has fully disappeared. Only after he smokes half of it does he allow himself to look back at Zoro. Zoro’s smile has faded, he looks back at Sanji for a moment, his eyes heavy from the alcohol.Without saying anything Zoro reaches out and places his hand on Sanji’s thigh, a few inches above his knee. Sanji feels like he’s about to burst into flames.The air around them feels charged, something bigger than them weighing them down. Sanji’s d@ck is hard just from this little bit of contact and Zoro’s bicep flexes when he squeezes Sanji’s thigh. His tan skin looks smooth in the dim light of the restaurant, but Sanji knows if he ran his hands over it it’d be rougher in some spots, thick scars like a roadmap of his journey.Zoro leans in, his earrings swaying gently, “You still hate me?”Sanji swallows, going to take a hasty pull off his cigarette before realizing it had burned down to a stub. He flicks it into the ashtray by his elbow and pushes his hair out of his eyes. Finally, he laughs, a humorless exhausted sound, says, “You’re going to hurt.”*After that, Sanji starts to lose control.It goes like this:Zoro cornering him in the galley after everyone else has gone to sleep, pressing his warm body against Sanji’s from behind. His breathing is quick, nervous, and he smells of sea salt and alcohol. It takes everything in Sanji to hold himself completely still. It’s the middle of the night and the lamps are only strong enough to cast a warm glow around the room. It’s easy for Sanji to see their reflection in the window above the sink; he looks skinny and fragile in comparison to Zoro and he likes it. F@ck.He would never admit it - even under pain of death - but, he thinks it’d be nice to be treated softly every once in a while. He knows he’s strong, powerful, deadly, but he’s still an ordinary human man and he’s seen what happens to men when they smother the softer parts of themselves in favor of being rough and sharp all of the time. He doesn’t want that to happen to him. Through all of his rage and fear of getting hurt he’s still allowed Zoro to stoke the tiny, hidden flame inside of himself.Later, when he’s alone in his bunk, he wonders what would’ve happened if he had turned around. If he’d leaned in and rested his head in the delicate curve between Zoro’s neck and shoulder - just for a second. It wouldn’t have to change anything. Sh@t, it wouldn’t even have to mean anything. Instead, they had stood there in silence for a while, Zoro’s arms around his waist as he pressed soft kisses to Sanji’s neck. Sanji had felt like he was about to melt into a puddle, like he would simply dissolve and there would be no way to come back to himself. He lays in his bunk and listens to the sounds of the ocean splashing against the hull and the soothing creaking of the ship as it sails onward. He thinks of Zoro and tries to summon every ounce of white hot rage inside of him and can’t. He can’t.*Zoro with his thick legs spread wide on a bench in the storage room, his dark eyes blazing, pupils blown. He reaches out with one hand, his bottom lip tugged between his teeth. Sanji reaches out after a moment’s hesitation, fingers shaking, and allows himself to be drawn closer. Closer and closer until he’s sitting on Zoro’s lap, straddling him. His chest rises and falls in the same way it does when he’s in a particularly challenging fight. Zoro’s strong arms wrap around his waist, caging him in. God, he thinks, brushing their lips together for a fraction of a second. God help me, he thinks as the kiss deepens and Zoro makes a sound like his chest is cracking open.“F@ck, you drive me f@ck@ng crazy.”Sanji knew this already. But, Zoro says it in a way that has him squirming on the other man’s lap. He doesn’t touch the feeling blooming in his chest; the thorny bud that screams at Sanji to take Zoro’s face in his hands and press kisses to the scars littered across it.Instead, he buries his face in Zoro’s neck and whispers, “I don’t think I hate you anymore.”Zoro twines his hand in Sanji’s hair, tight, possessive and kisses him again. Deep and urgent, like it might be his last chance and he doesn’t want to run the risk of this one day being forgotten.This time, Sanji doesn’t stop them from going further.Heat licks at him from the inside and he feverishly grinds their hips together, gasps clawing their way out of his throat each time Zoro moans brokenly. Zoro pants against him, his desperate sounds only making Sanji hungrier. He hurriedly strips out of his jacket and shirt, tossing his tie over his shoulder onto the dusty floor before tugging at Zoro’s shirt, chanting, “Off, off, off.”Zoro fumbles out of his shirt quickly, his arms wrapping back around Sanji the moment he’s finished. His grip is firm, but gentle at the same time. He nips at Sanji’s swollen lips over and over again like he just wants to sink his teeth in and take a bite out. Instead, he curls his tongue around the shell of Sanji’s ear, the sensation sending shivers through him, before pressing wet kisses across Sanji’s collarbone and throat.Sanji tips his head back, his cheeks and chest flushed a bright red and his d@ck throbbing in his pants. God, he wants this. He tries to speak, but his voice comes out as a raspy whisper, “Zoro.”Zoro ignores him, tightening his hold as he finally caves in and bites at the soft flesh between Sanji’s pectoral and shoulder. The sting makes his hips jerk and Zoro groans something obscene into his skin.“Zoro,” he tries again, his fingers all twisted up in green strands as he tries to both push and pull Zoro away from his chest.“Please,” Zoro grits out. “Don’t make me stop. Just this once let me have you. Just once, Sanji.”He should say no. He should say not now and not ever. But, he aches. He stares up at the ceiling, hears the harsh sound of their breathing mixing in the stuffy room, feels Zoro’s thumb rubbing tiny circles at the base of his spine. Feels Zoro’s d@ck pressed against his ass and the way he’s still, waiting for Sanji to speak. It does something to him to have Zoro waiting for a go ahead. It does something to him to have the Demon of the East holding himself in check and waiting for Sanji’s permission. Zoro’s killed so many people Sanji doesn’t even want to try coming up with a number. He’s sliced open throats and bellies without a second thought, but now he’s got Sanji in his lap and he’s pleading to be inside him.Sanji steels himself, swears that as soon as it’s done he won’t ever think about it again. Once it’s out of his system he can go back to normal. He won’t long for Zoro’s touch or attention. He won’t notice the deep tan of his skin against the white of his shirt or the drunken blush on his cheeks or the way his eyes go lethal when he ties his bandana around his head in a fight.Sanji cranes his neck down, touches his forehead to Zoro’s and feels lightheaded at the way Zoro’s eyes flutter. Their lips brush as he whispers, “Just once?”Zoro swallows, the sound loud in the silence. He kisses Sanji, tender and slow. What would it feel like to be loved in this way? Their lips part, Zoro agrees, “Just once.”They crash together again, kissing and biting their way to oblivion and without his permission Sanji’s heart bleeds for Zoro. They try to go slow, to drag this lapse in judgement out for as long as possible, but it’s harder said than done.Too soon, they’re sprawled out on the dirty floor, Sanji’s pants and underwear twisted around one of his ankles, his chest heaving as he moans. He hurriedly pushes his hair out of his eye as he bounces up and down before gripping back onto Zoro’s shoulder for balance. He doesn’t want to miss a single second of this. Zoro’s skin is slick with sweat, his biceps flexing as he helps to lift Sanji on each thrust, his lips bitten petal pink. When their eyes meet Zoro groans, his eyes hungry and his voice thick with pleasure. “F@ck, Sanji, you look so f@ck@ng good.”“Sh@t,” Sanji blushes, looking away. “Don’t - oh god - don’t f@ck@ng talk.”Zoro’s so big and hard inside him it was almost too much at first, the way Zoro shushed him as he f@ck@d inside, stretching Sanji open slowly. It didn’t take long for the last thread of pain to morph into something Sanji’s never felt before. Something so good he can’t even be bothered to feel embarrassed about the way he’s bouncing on another man’s d@ck, the way he’s using Zoro like his sole purpose in life is to make Sanji feel good.Sweat beads on his skin and his thighs burn as he pushes himself faster. He looks at Zoro, his eyes heavy lidded, and drags his nails down Zoro’s chest. The resulting hiss of pain he hears and the blooming of angry red lines only serve to make Sanji’s d@ck even harder. Zoro looks so f@ck@ng good underneath him; Sanji wants to see what he looks like in every position. Wants to see him blissed out with his hands on the back of Sanji’s head, encouraging him to take his d@ck deep into his throat. Wants to see him trembling above Sanji, holding himself up as he pounds him into the mattress. Wants to see him on his knees, his head thrown back as he comes for Sanji.“Why does it feel like this?” Sanji whimpers, shaking himself out of his thoughts. “It shouldn’t. I can’t stop. F@ck, I thought I could, but I can’t. Zoro.”“Shh,” Zoro breathes, “Don’t think about it just let it happen. It’s okay.” He pulls Sanji down to him then, encouraging him to lean his full weight on Zoro’s chest. Sanji rests one palm on the spot above Zoro’s heart while the other claws at the floor above them both, a giveaway of just how much control Sanji has lost over himself. He hides his face in the crook of Zoro’s neck and mouths at the salty skin there gently.“It’s okay,” Zoro whispers again. He gets his feet planted on the ground, his knees bent, and holds Sanji to him as he f@cks up into him mercilessly. Sanji cries out, the sound of Zoro’s hips smacking against his ass making him squeeze his eyes shut tight in embarrassment even as his d@ck spits up on Zoro’s stomach. “I’ve got you. Just let it happen, baby.”Tears well up in Sanji’s eyes as he clings to Zoro, the change in angle causing Zoro to slam into the hot, greedy little spot inside him over and over again.Zoro gets a hand up to cradle the back of Sanji’s head; he turns him so that they’re looking each other in the eyes again. A tear slides down Sanji’s cheek and Zoro catches it with the tip of his tongue.“You feel so good inside me,” Sanji confesses, his voice hoarse.“Wanna f@ck you until you can’t take it anymore and fill you up. Haven’t even looked at anyone else since that night at the hotel. B@lls are full, heavy. You gonna let me fill you up, Sanji? You gonna milk it right out of me?”“Yes,” Sanji moans, loud. Can’t think of a reason to be quiet, can’t think past anything but the feeling of getting f@ck@d open and filled with Zoro’s come. “Please, let me have it. I want it.”“You want it?” The corner of his mouth pulls up into a filthy grin.“I need it,” he sobs. He clumsily pushes himself up, and goes back to riding Zoro. Raises himself all the way to the tip before dropping back down, hard. He works Zoro’s d@ck the way he deserves, milks it the way he deserves. He begs, “Please, fill me up.”Zoro comes with a shout then, his whole body going taut as he pumps into Sanji one last time, giving Sanji what he begged for. The sight of him with his head tipped back, the tendons in his neck straining, his slick mouth wide open sends Sanji over the edge. Waves of pleasure swallow him whole as he comes all over Zoro’s stomach and chest, sick satisfaction dragging his @rg@sm out even longer.When it’s done they lay there in a heap, catching their breath slowly, as Sanji lets himself have one last lapse. He presses kisses to Zoro’s cheeks, forehead, lips, and nose. Zoro lets him, his eyes closed and a small smile on his face.When it’s really done, Sanji steals his heart from Zoro’s grasp and shoves it back into his chest. It calls out for Zoro for the rest of the week.*Zoro is training in the crow’s nest, pushing his body so far past its limits worry begins to nag at Sanji deep in his chest. Still, he leans against the door frame to watch, quiet as he smokes his cigarette. Zoro only glances at him once before turning his focus back on his work out; his body glistening in the sunlight, sweat dripping down his arms and back in tiny rivers. His muscles bunch and relax as he does his reps and Sanji’s foot taps against the ground impatiently, lust coiling inside of him.When he finishes he sets his weights down and finally turns all of his attention on Sanji. Sanji shivers, a smirk lifting the corner of his mouth. Zoro looks at him from across the room, his breathing still heavy, his dark eyes dragging over every inch of Sanji’s lithe body. He can’t tell if Zoro wants to kill him or f@ck him. Sh@t, maybe both.“Meet me in the bathroom,” Sanji calls, forcing himself to turn away.*“Thought you might want to fight with me today,” Zoro says, ducking his head to hide the disappointment that Sanji can still hear in his voice. He feels like he can read Zoro like a book at this point; finds it almost laughable that someone who wears their heart on their sleeve can cause grown men to sh@t themselves in fear at the sight of him.“Was going to,” Sanji replies, pointing to the corner of the room where Zoro can leave his swords. “Luffy’s had a sweet tooth lately; I’ve been stuck in the galley all day. I’ve made around forty different cakes - all with multiple layers - and I still don’t think they’ll last through the week.”“Probably not,” Zoro snorts, the fondness that he holds for Luffy bringing a smile to his face. A sharp stab of jealousy pierces him for just a moment before he shoves it away. “What’s for dinner tonight anyway?”Sanji rolls his eyes, “You eat the same sh@t every time no matter what I make. You don’t have to pretend to care. That’s not what this is.”“Maybe I just like listening to you,” Zoro says, not an ounce of shame peeking through the look he pins Sanji with. “You ever think of that?”Sanji didn’t. He stays silent.“Pretend to care,” Zoro shucks off his underwear, shaking his head in irritation. “There’s only one person still pretending, Sanji, and it isn’t me.”Sanji bristles, his temper flaring up instinctually. He thinks about gathering up his clothes and getting dressed and storming out, maybe trying to fight Zoro for real. But when he goes to open his mouth to start yelling he notices how tired Zoro looks. His expression is open, but his shoulders are slumped and his brows are pulled together in a way that belies stress. The anger in him fizzles out just as quickly as it arose and he turns the shower on instead of running his mouth anymore than he already has.Zoro trembles as Sanji pulls him into the shower, his body like a band stretched to its breaking point. Sanji wants to push him over the edge. He doesn’t know why he keeps doing this to himself, just knows he couldn’t stop even if he wanted to. At night he lays in his bunk and goes over it again and again; tells himself to leave Zoro the f@ck alone only to give in to the gaping hole in his chest each morning. He tells himself he won’t talk to Zoro anymore, won’t even look his way unless it’s to argue or fight, but it never lasts. Zoro strolls into the galley each morning and sits down at the table before asking Sanji for a cup of tea and sipping at it while Sanji bustles about, preparing for the rest of the day. Sometimes he asks Sanji about Zeff or about his least favorite foods or what he felt like the first time he realized he was different, that his body could do things nobody else’s could. At first, Sanji had ignored him, didn’t want to risk chipping away at the walls of hate he protected himself with, but Zoro wore away at his resolve. Sanji defies himself every single day by allowing Zoro to worm his way into the core of his being. He thinks about him before he goes to sleep each night and again in the morning when he wakes up.Now, they’re here.Sanji’s cheek is pressed against the wall of the shower, his body burning up, the cool of the tiles barely even registering. He knows he’s making stupid sounds, but he can’t seem to close his mouth. A pretty pink blush stains his cheeks and though his hair is plastered to his face he doesn’t care. He arches his back even further, popping his ass up that extra inch. His heart’s pounding in his chest and the words more and please and Zoro run on an endless loop in his head.Zoro f@cks into him slowly from behind, his c@ck sliding in easily, Sanji’s hole stretched wide open for him. He’s got Sanji’s wrists held behind his back in one hand and when Sanji tries to break the hold to bring his arm around so he can jack himself off Zoro reaches up with his other hand and yanks Sanji’s head back by his hair, hard.Sanji cries out, his c@ck is so hard it hurts, he just wants to get his hand on it for a second, but Zoro won’t let him.The water rains down, hot steam engulfing them and making their bodies loose and open. Every little touch feels that much more intense. Zoro’s d@ck is so hard inside him it almost hurts; all the soft parts of him are squeezing around him so f@ck@ng tight it’s like his body doesn’t ever want to let Zoro go again. Wants Zoro to know that nobody can make him feel as good as Sanji can. Nobody.“Sanji,” Zoro groans, shoving Sanji’s face back against the wall. He trails his hand down Sanji’s chest and belly before latching onto his hip, his fingers digging in possessively.Sanji gasps, pleasure making his belly go hot and tight. Zoro pumps his hips faster, bottoming out and grinding in on every third stroke. It’d taken a minute for Zoro to find that tender spot inside him, but now he hits it every time, shivers wracking their way through Sanji’s body. His own dick won’t stop leaking; if they’d been somewhere dry he wonders how big the puddle on the floor would be.Zoro f@cks him like he wants to leave a mark inside of Sanji; like he wants Sanji’s body to remember the shape of him, to open up for him anytime he so much as looks at him.A moan tears its way out of his throat and he slurs, “You’re so deep. Sh@t, you’re so f@ck@ng deep.”Zoro leans forward then, sucking at Sanji’s earlobe in a way that makes Sanji’s toes curl against the shower floor, a high whining sound escaping from his chest. He slows his strokes down, but puts more force into them, each thrust making Sanji’s body jolt forward. He feels like he can’t breathe, his chest rising and falling rapidly as his legs shake beneath him.Zoro pants against his ear, finally releasing his hold on Sanji’s wrist to get another hand on his waist. Then he lifts Sanji up. His hands scramble against the wall as his feet leave the ground; Zoro doesn’t stop for even a second, treating Sanji like he weighs five pounds, like he’s his own personal rag doll. “Feels good?” Zoro asks, his voice hoarse and breathy. “You like it?”Sanji nods, can’t even remember how to string words together.“I’m giving you what you want, right?” Zoro moans, his hips stuttering for only a moment before he pulls Sanji down onto his c@ck again. “I’d f@ck you like this every day if you’d let me. Just wanna make you happy, Sanji. Am I?”Sanji can already feel his @rg@sm building; his whole body starting to go tight as Zoro stuffs him full over and over again.“Tell me,” Zoro begs. “Am I making you happy?”“Yes,” He sobs, his c@ck spurting onto the wall, his @rg@sm hitting him like a punch to the gut. “So f@ck@ng happy. F@ck@ng @ssh@l@.”Sanji can feel his hole clenching down on Zoro’s c@ck as he comes causing Zoro to make a pained sound like Sanji’s squeezing him so tight it hurts. He comes a second later, holding them flush together, his head thrown back in ecstasy.They stay like that for a minute, catching their breath as Zoro softens inside him until he slips out. Sanji lets himself be guided by Zoro’s gentle hands, his back against the wall and his hands tracing the scar Zoro got the day they crashed into each other’s lives. Steam swirls around them and water drips down their bodies and even though they’re pressed together completely something inside of Sanji is pleading for him to get even closer. He lets his tongue catch a few drops of water as they slide down Zoro’s clavicle. Feels like a man in a desert. Feels like an eight year old kid dying of starvation in the middle of the ocean.He doesn’t know how to come back from this. Thinks, it’s too late.*A few nights later he lays out on the grass on the deck, the blanket of stars above him keeping him company. He feels lost. Feels like he's being swallowed whole. The rest of the crew went to bed hours ago and with the moon high in the sky, it feels like he’s floating alone in the middle of the ocean.Hesitantly, Zoro stretches out next to him, laying his head in Sanji’s lap. Sanji holds his breath and stares up at the stars, his chest going tight as his heart pounds frantically, and it isn’t until Zoro paws at his hand that he glances down once more. He watches, feeling almost out of his body, as Zoro tugs at his hand until it’s in his hair. Sanji pictures the jungle after a rainstorm, parsley sprouts pushing through damp earth, unripe plantains hanging from tree branches, a luna moth sipping nectar from a flower. He pictures a thousand different shades of the same color as he runs his fingers feather light through soft, green strands. At some point, Zoro grabs ahold of his hand again and brings it to his lips for a kiss. Sanji’s eyes flutter closed and his heart pangs, something tender and bright trying to pull itself from decades of debris. He takes this feeling - this moment - and buries it so deep inside of himself he’ll never have to worry about it disappearing on him.“When this is all over - when Luffy’s King of the pirates and you’ve made it to the All Blue what comes next?”“I don’t know,” Sanji admits. “I honestly haven’t thought about it.”Zoro hums.“What about you?”Zoro laughs, “I’ll probably still be following you around.”Sanji laughs as well, thinking it’s a bad joke, “Yeah, right. Seriously, what’s the plan? Go back to bounty hunting or maybe open up your own dojo?”“Sanji,” Zoro mumbles. “When this is all over I’m gonna be wherever you are.”“Right,” Sanji rolls his eyes, his mood quickly turning sour. “People say things like that all the time. They say they’ll always be there - oh, we’ll keep in touch. We’ll visit. Everything dwindles. Friends become strangers. It’s just not the way things go.”Zoro suddenly sits up straight, his voice urgent as he says, “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be with you for as long as you’ll have me. I don’t care about the stupid sh@t other people say or promise; I’m not them. I’m telling you right now if you let me I’ll be there. I don’t give a f@ck if you want to build a restaurant in a desert or on top of a glacier or if you wanna keep sailing around dodging marines and getting into fights; I’ll be there. With you. Still.”*He finds Robin sitting by the aquarium, her nose buried in a book as she absently stirs a delicate cup of tea by her elbow. He approaches timidly, not wanting to interrupt her reading, but also feeling like he won’t find a better opportunity to speak to her in private like this again. He sinks into the seat across from her and eyes the fish swimming lazily to his left. He lights a cigarette to calm his nerves and allows his mind to wander freely for a moment. After she finishes the chapter she sets her bookmark and closes the book, setting it down on the table and folding her hands on top of it.“Good book?” Sanji asks.“Oh, yes,” she says, her tone amused. “It was written quite some time ago, but it details the inner workings and every day life of two very different tribes on an island in the North Blue. They were completely isolated from the rest of the world, untouched until this researcher stumbled across them after being marooned during a storm.”“Right up your alley,” Sanji smirks.“Definitely,” she nods, smiling. “But, something tells me you didn’t seek me out to speak about my book.”“No,” Sanji admits, falling silent.Robin nods again, but says nothing, just waits for him to speak. She radiates calm, like she’d be more than content to sit here for however long it takes for Sanji to work up the courage to ask what he came here to ask.Finally, he asks, “How do you do it? How do you let people in after everything you’ve been through? All the betrayal. Having nobody to trust, but yourself?”“Honestly,” she sighs. “It’s something I’m still working on. I wake up every day and choose this: this life, this happiness. You, Luffy, and the others.”“But, how?” Sanji asks again, his voice cracking. “Don’t you ever think about what will happen if it all goes wrong somehow? If one day you wake up and suddenly everything is ruined?”“Of course,” she says, like it’s obvious. “But, that hasn’t happened yet. It might never happen. I have what I dreamed of now. I’m here now. I can’t control what happens six months or three years from now. Maybe we’re all in different corners of the world talking sh@t about each other or maybe we’re still on the ship chasing our dreams, caring for and about one another.” She reaches across the table, placing her hand on top of his. “Sanji, the day we joined the crew is the day we took our chance on finding happiness. Choose happiness. Choose life. Choose right now. If you spend all your time fearing the what ifs you’ll miss out on everything, not just the bad, but the good, too.”Sanji says nothing, but twines their fingers together tightly.“Zoro is good,” Robin says, gently.“I know,” he whispers.“These people that we’ve found are not the people we left behind. They’re not the ones who have hurt us. I know it’s hard. I know it seems impossible at times, but little by little you need to let go of all that hate and anger. The sadness and fear.”He stares at their hands, trying and failing to ignore the lump in his throat. His eyes sting with tears and he wipes them away roughly with the sleeve of his jacket.“Zoro is who he is, Sanji. There are no hidden motivations or schemes or ill intent. I can’t sit here and say it’ll be easy or that everything will be rainbows and sunshine in the end, but if the only thing stopping you from trying is fear I think you’ll regret pushing him away as time passes.”He hesitates, a fragile smile sneaking onto his face, “You’re right, as always, my dear Robin.”She rolls her eyes at him good-naturedly, “You just have to try, Sanji.”“I will,” he says. “I will.”*Luffy finds him early one morning, the sun barely peeking over the horizon, the sky bleeding orange, yellow, and pink. He’s leaning on the railing, an unlit cigarette perched between his lips, when he hears the soft clap of Luffy’s sandals on the deck.He turns to face his captain, his voice stern, “It’s not time for breakfast yet, Luffy. Give me another hour and I’ll have everything ready.”“That’s okay,” Luffy waves his hand dismissively, his eyes serious in a way that makes Sanji nervous. “I want to talk to you about something else.”“Okay,” Sanji murmurs. “What’s up?”Luffy stares at him for a moment, his eyes searching Sanji’s face for something known only to him before reaching out and tapping Sanji in the middle of his forehead. “You think too much.”Sanji smacks his hand away gently, rolling his eyes, “Well, one of us has to.”“Sometimes the brain gets in the way,” Luffy says, ignoring Sanji’s comment completely. “Overthinking can ruin things before they even get a chance to begin. Sometimes, you have to shut all of the cr@p going on in your head down and listen to what your heart is telling you.”Sanji blinks, completely caught off guard by the direction Luffy is going in and unable to form a single coherent thought.“Life can be painful,” Luffy continues, undeterred by Sanji’s silence. “It can be cruel and vicious and it’ll eat you up and spit you out if you give it half a chance, but you have to keep fighting. You have to live. Really live.”Sanji looks away from his captain, turning back to the gorgeous sunrise in front of them. As much as he loves and admires Luffy, he wishes he would shut the f@ck up and go away right about now.Luffy’s dark gaze pins him where he stands, and even though he knows it’s coming, Sanji still lets out a shaky breath when Luffy says, “Zoro is solid.”Begrudgingly, Sanji admits, “I know.”“I don’t know how long we’ll all be together,” Luffy shrugs, the devil-may-care attitude locking back into place now that he’s gotten to the meat of the issue. “But, if I had what you two seem to have I’d hold on tight and never let go.”“Well,” Sanji sighs, defeated. “That’s the problem, isn’t it?”Befuddled, Luffy’s eyebrows draw together as he asks, “What is?”“I never hold on tight enough.”*Sanji lets all of his bottled up fear and hatred evaporate into nothingness on a ship that isn’t his with a broken leg, a couple of cracked ribs, and a war lord staring him down.Later, when it’s all said and done, the dust cleared, the wounds healed, and the broken bones mended, he allows his mind to drift back to that moment and linger. He hadn’t thought about what he was doing; he didn’t need to. Sanji had seen Zoro kneeling on the ground, his body unable to even keep him on his feet, and he ignored his own agony and stood in front of him. There would never be a time when he would allow Zoro to sacrifice himself for him ever. He doesn’t know when that became a part of him, but it’s there now and isn’t going away. He didn’t feel fear at the very real possibility that he was about to be annihilated, but at the thought that Kuma would not pick him and would instead choose Zoro. His mind raced as he tried to keep his cool; if Kuma did choose Zoro how would he stop it? Could he take the hit before it reached Zoro or would his shattered body be too slow?He stays in the memory for longer than is probably healthy, but no matter how many times he restarts the scenario he doesn’t regret his decision. If he is destined to lose Zoro one day then let it be to differing dreams and ambitions rather than death. Anything, but death.Slowly, he dives back into his memory and goes past his offer to the absolute fury and devastation he felt when Zoro jammed the hilt of his sword into his side. He had already been hanging onto consciousness by a thread at that point and with that hit it finally slipped from his grasp. He remembers trying to grab onto Zoro’s arm, the way he couldn’t make his fingers tighten enough to hold on. The way Zoro stood immobile in the face of his desperation.When he woke up out of the blackness to the sounds of Luffy’s laughter it took less than a second for his relief at his captain’s safety to turn to horror and panic as he searched for Zoro. His blood turned to ice in his veins as his stomach tied itself in knots. He remembers finding him, finally. At first glance, he looked as if he’d died rooted to the spot he stood on. Everything in him felt sharp and cold and ugly for that brief minute before he heard Zoro groan in pain.“F@ck,” Sanji whispered, tears blurring his vision. “What the f@ck is wrong with you?”Zoro turned his head slowly, just that simple movement causing his face to spasm in pain.“You don’t get to f@ck@ng choose death you f@ck@ng jackass,” Sanji spat. His cheeks were wet and the salt from his tears was making his lip sting a bit, but he continued his tirade. “You f@ck@ng idiot. What the f@ck were you even thinking? I wanted him to choose me! I was fine with that.”“I was thinking it was my duty to protect my crew,” he said, his teeth gritted in pain. “I was thinking it wouldn’t be much of a life if you weren’t in it anymore.”After that, he passed out. Sanji caught him just before he hit the ground and carefully lowered them onto the cracked stone.*A few days later, after they’ve left Thriller Bark to drift behind them, Zoro finds him in the crow’s nest.“You’re still mad at me,” Zoro sighs, sitting down next to Sanji.“Yes,” he grunts without hesitation. He is, he’s f@ck@ng furious. He feels rage and fear and confusion and desperation. He wants to tell Zoro he made the wrong choice back there; that dying for Sanji and the rest of the crew is still abandonment. Zoro would have left him the same way Sanji always knew he would. He wants to fight him and scream at him and tell him he’s no different from the rest, but he keeps his mouth shut tight and tries to convince himself that he can leave first. Sanji could get off the ship at the next island and never look back. He could find a way back to the Baratie and the old man and write this whole experience off as one incredibly long fever dream.“I’m still here,” Zoro says, reaching out for Sanji’s hand before thinking better of it and withdrawing. “How many more times do you need me to say it?”He thinks, a million more times.He doesn’t say that, though. He doesn’t say anything. He turns his back on Zoro and retreats.*Is this what love is? Hushed conversations in the dark corners of a pirate ship with the weight of hatred sliding off his back? What about getting drunk in the blistering heat with your fingers brushing every time you pass the bottle back and forth? What about washing someone’s hair when they’re too injured to do it themselves and your hands are tender and more gentle than you ever thought possible? What about cooking the same food someone’s mother made for them every week when they were a child? What about offering your life for theirs?What about “I’ve been yours for a long time now” declared without an ounce of doubt under a blanket of stars?“What did you just say?”“You heard me.”He doesn’t know what it is. But, it builds and builds inside of him until it’s almost unbearable. His hands grasp at the air by his sides, his thighs ache, and his mind races. He drags Zoro into the galley and locks the door behind him. He paces around the room, feeling like he’s about to jump right out of his skin. The room is cool and silent, the sound of the waves crashing against the shoreline is faint.He looks at Zoro, at the scar on his lip that never went away and his shoulders and his hands and he longs.It hits them at the same time. Sanji stops pacing and Zoro steps forward, backing him up against the nearest wall. He boxes him in, his hands planted firmly on the wall on either side of Sanji’s head. Sanji’s hands flit to the bottom of Zoro’s unbuttoned shirt, briefly playing with the hem before letting go and searching out the warm skin underneath.Zoro’s eyes close, a soft moan slipping out that makes Sanji lick his lips, makes his own breath come heavy. Zoro whispers, “Tell me - tell me it’s like this for you, too.”Sanji startles, his gaze snapping up from Zoro’s mouth to his eyes. He looks hungry, looks f@ck@d out and wired, looks like he’ll cut down anyone that tries to come in between them. Sanji has to swallow twice before his voice works, “Like what?”“I think about this - about you - all the time. I see you in my dreams; they’re always the same. I spend half the time trying to get my hands on you and the other half trying to tell you something. Every time we do this it feels like somewhere down the line a piece of me broke off and I didn’t notice until now, but it’s okay because you’ve been holding onto it the whole time.”Sanji doesn’t know what to say. He feels sick. He wants to tell Zoro to stop f@ck@ng talking because he can feel that hungry hole in his chest tear even wider and he’s running out of things to fill it up with that won’t hurt him.Zoro cups his cheek, his thumb caressing the swell of his lip. He looks at him with a tenderness that makes Sanji’s hands shake and says, “It’s not enough anymore, Sanji.”His voice breaking, he admits, “No, it’s not.”“Maybe it never was.”“But, it was.” Sanji tries, insistent. “It used to be okay. We just have to figure out how to go back to that.”Zoro sighs, sadness sweeping across his face, “Is that really what you want?”“It’s all I know,” he confesses, his voice barely a whisper. “It’s the only thing I’ve gotten right.”“We could get this right, too.”“But, what if we don’t?”“But, what if we do?”*He kisses every forgotten inch of skin he can reach. The healing scars on Sanji’s knuckles, the hidden spot behind his earlobe, the thin skin of his sternum, the pale crook of his knee. Sanji gasps, his hands shielding his eyes as the lump in his throat continues to swell. He begs, “Stop. Please.”“What’s wrong?”“It hurts.” Feels like he’s got a fever burning him from the inside out. What will be left of him?“Where?”Sanji brings a hand down and lays it flat over his heart. His voice is thick with unshed tears, “You’re killing me.”“No, sweetheart,” Gently, Zoro twines their fingers together and moves their joined hands away from Sanji’s chest. “I’m saving us.”*Zoro climbs into bed with him at night and presses their faces together. Cheek to cheek. It makes Sanji f@ck@ng nervous, makes him want to crawl out of his skin and get as far away as possible at first. But, then Zoro throws a leg over him, trapping him, and starts rubbing circles into his belly with his thumb. It takes a minute or two, but he relaxes. Feels himself settle in.They’ve f@ck@d, a lot actually, but Sanji’s still never felt this close to another person before in his life. Where does he end and Zoro begin? Do other people do this?Sanji remembers a time when he’d flinch if someone so much as reached towards him. Remembers a more recent time when he’d feel rage simmering in his belly, ugly and mean, anytime someone touched him. A back pat from a stranger, an arm around the shoulders from a coworker, a hug from a friend. It didn’t matter who they were. Something inside of him would rear its ugly head.He turns his head to pepper kisses along Zoro’s cheek and jawline. Love, he thinks, this is love.“What if you get bored of me?” He mumbles, eyes shut tight against the possibility of rejection.Zoro turns his face, his nose running along Sanji’s hairline, and breathes in deeply, “I won’t.”“What if you get annoyed with me?”At this, Zoro snorts, shifting his body so that he’s laying on top of Sanji, forcing him to look Zoro in the eyes, “I’ve been annoyed with you every single day since the moment I met you. At this point, if you’re not annoying me, something is seriously wrong.”Sanji rolls his eyes and shoves at Zoro’s shoulder light heartedly, but still worries at his bottom lip with his teeth. Allowing the warmth and surprising softness of Zoro’s body to lull him into a hazy sense of security and comfort he finally confesses, “I don’t know what I would do if I lost you. I thought that if I could just twist my feelings into something harder or meaner that I would stop caring.”Zoro reaches up to smooth the furrow in Sanji’s brow, his eyes bright with hope.“I want to be happy. I want to live. I want to try,” Sanji says, voice firm. When Zoro cracks a smile, blinding in its beauty, Sanji says, “Ask me again.”For his part, Zoro doesn’t hesitate, doesn’t even have to clarify what it is that Sanji’s looking for. Just locks eyes with him and asks, “Do you hate me?”“No,” Sanji shakes his head, a grin nearly splitting his face in half. “I love you. I love you more than I know how to put into words.”Zoro kisses him then and Sanji feels…happy. The world isn’t collapsing around him, the crew isn’t splintering off into different directions, and Zoro isn’t running for the hills after his little revelation. Though it’s a meek voice, nearly buried in the back of his mind, he thinks, maybe this will work.“There’s no world in which I’m not in love with you,” Zoro says.“Who’s the love sick fool, now?” Sanji jokes, his voice thick with emotion.Zoro bites at his lip playfully, his voice teasing and his eyes fond, “Still you, jackass.”'
User: Summarize the chapter based on the content provided, ensuring to follow the set format and emphasize key aspects within the specified length.
User: Summarize the chapter based on the content provided, ensuring to follow the set format and emphasize key aspects within the specified length.
Assistant: