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imagine starting a business and pouring your entire heart into it

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and then watching it fail

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and now imagine doing that not once

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not twice

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but more than 10 times look you guys

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most people show you the highlight reel of their successes

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but today I'm showing you the bloopers

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the 10+ I think it's close to 14 businesses that I started

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why they didn't work

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and what it took to finally get to the three that actually worked

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got my coffee here so it's story time

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so at 25 I left a consulting job

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that probably a lot of people would have killed for

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thinking that I was ready to take on the world

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I mean I've been promoted several times in the only four short years

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and I had thought that if I was so good at what I was doing

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I could probably do anything

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but what followed

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was a string of businesses that didn't really go the way I planned

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but here's the thing failure is only failure if you stop trying

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so today

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I'm going to show you how every step brought me closer to success

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actually alright

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so grab your cup of tea or coffee

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and let me walk you through the business is that I started

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what went wrong and what I Learned along the way

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so first off

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I went on to start this consulting company for IU Funds many

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many years ago as I left my corporate consulting job

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I did that to start this consulting company for IU Funds in Romania

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which is my mother country

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that's where I was born and I thought I know how to sell

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I was one of the best sellers in our consulting firm

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so I can learn the rest and I can do it

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and I did technically but here's the reality

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although I could learn the

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let's say technicalities and rules

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understanding how something works isn't enough to drive business

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because what I realized a few months in

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is that I didn't really understand the local market's expectations

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and clients didn't just want my expertise

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they wanted this very specific way of working

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that I had not anticipated

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I had not thought of and that was a mismatch with my values

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so that was a good enough reason to see my first business sink however

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the positive is that for this business

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my then boyfriend now husband and I

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we went on to build our first website

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we Learned how to drive traffic

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which is a skill that we use to this day

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now after doing that business

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my husband and I we started a SAS company because we thought okay

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we need to do something that we know inside out

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and the best way to do that then was to combine our expertise right

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so we created a SAS product that was offering tax consulting

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I mean it was doing best of both worlds right

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my husband had spent lots of years in it and technology

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and I had spent all those years in consulting

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so nine months later we worked on that baby day and night right

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not only did I have to bring back my coding skills

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and brush up on them because I had studied that a long time ago

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but I had not used coding in years

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but I also Learned how to bootstrap a business um

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we had to work with developers and testers

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because obviously the workload was way too much for the two of us

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so we had to consider uh

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bringing in more people to support given the time pressure and um

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I can tell you the whole story and other time if you guys want

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just let me know in the comments down below okay

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so what happened to that business

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essentially it worked really well for the first couple years

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we had tons of interest

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but actually only a few sales and if you're wondering why

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well it's because there were probably three main problems first

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the Romanian market was not ready for that tech secondly um

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I think it's the lack of funding at the end of the day

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because we were boots dropping

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but by the time we ran out of cash

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we weren't able to raise any funds because again

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the Romanian market was not ready to invest in something like this

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and the whole VC

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private equity environment in that market was not where it is today

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I guess and uh

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probably the third

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and maybe biggest problem is that we priced it wrong

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back then all softer solutions were being priced per license

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and we went ahead with the same model

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not understanding the customer behavior

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and by the time we understood that

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and we adjusted the pricing to be per usage

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it was way too late and we had run out of cash

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so I guess for this one

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my main lesson there was that timing and execution matter

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just as much as the idea itself however

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the positive is that this experience alone

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I believe played a significant role in getting me

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or me being able to get into

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the NBA program that I later on was accepted in

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as well as getting me a very nice scholarship to be able to fund said

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NBA program okay

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so what did we do after this experience

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well after that I went back into consulting

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but this time more as a freelancer

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I mean I call it freelancing but it's not really it

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it was more of a one person consulting firm with me

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and this junior associate who was helping me

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so this is where I Learned a big lesson

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which I think is one of the big mistakes that many new entrepreneurs

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or many of the people who transition from

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the corporate space to entrepreneurship

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usually make just because you're good at something

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doesn't necessarily mean that you'll automatically run

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a good business in that field

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because I had no systems I had no strategy

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I had no scalability and later on

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I actually ended up going into more of an entrepreneur physician

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that's another crazy story

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um so if you want I can expand on that as well in another video

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so

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let me know in the comments if that's something you're interested in

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because I think being an entrepreneur

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um was one of the most fun

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um and um

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highly educational experiences I've been through

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okay so we're on to business No. 4

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I think that's when we started drop shipping

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and this seemed like a very straightforward business idea

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and business model I mean it was not so convoluted as selling SAS

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and also it relied a lot on operations management

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which I'm naturally really good at

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so I thought okay this sounds like a no brainer

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so I spent months picking the product

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using tools using data analysis to decide which niche to go into

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I read tons of blogs

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I watched probably every single dropshipping video

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that there was here on YouTube

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back then there weren't that many by the way

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and in the end we went for

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this we went for a phone charger

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I mean thinking that this was probably

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twelve years ago

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maybe 11 this was quite revolutionary guys

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um okay

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and we spend a lot of time thinking about how to do it

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um and the idea was that you could use this

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and use your phone while you're charging it

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so that's why we called it elevate and the brand was called sketch um

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we had a designer design this beautiful logo

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because Canva was not around back then

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I was actually really happy with what we picked

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we found a really nice supplier who made this

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and who sent us this sample

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and I thought okay

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this would be an easy way to scale right

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until our supplier stole the product idea and launched a replica

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which instead of being called sketch was being called Ska Tech

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yeah and that happened before we even got started

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so sometimes the risk isn't the market

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it's the partners that you choose and unfortunately

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I Learned that the hard way no

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on to business No. 5 and 6 together uh

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because this one was a Facebook group and a blog

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focused both on working from home for moms

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and both of them were called office in the bed

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they were great

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in the sense that there were a lot of people who joined the group

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and who read my blog

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but I did know a lot about monetizing blog posts or blogs back then

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and also there wasn't a lot of engagement on the Facebook group

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and I didn't know how to truly run that community however

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what I did learn is how to run effective Facebook ads

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so definitely lots and lots of learnings

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but if I were to do this again

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I would do it very differently

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and I would drive engagement in that community

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in a very different way no business No. 6 and 7 together

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and that is career coaching and YouTube

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so essentially back in 2016 I started career coaching

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which I absolutely loved it had happened

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at that point that a lot of people in the company that I was working

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that were coming to me for career advice

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because I was always getting promoted

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and I was always getting recognition

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and either they also wanted the same results

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or their managers would send them to me to coach them

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for them to be able to get the same outcomes

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and while I absolutely loved doing that

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and I thrived on seeing the people that I was coaching

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getting results

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it had come to a point where I was spending a lot of time doing that

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and I was not able to scale because time was my limitation

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and that's when I actually stumbled upon YouTube

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I mean I was familiar with YouTube

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but I had never thought about using it myself if that makes sense

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so essentially what started more as an experiment

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I guess

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it very quickly became the foundation for everything that I now do

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so courses digital products

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the e books

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affiliate marketing and now even helping others grow their channels

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so it wasn't easy from the beginning

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don't get me wrong

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I can probably tell you the whole story of how I ended up growing

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this YouTube channel in a separate video

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but I guess the bottom line is that I felt like I had finally found

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the right platform essentially a place where all of my lessons

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all of my failures could come together and work in harmony

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or at least I thought is if you watched my previous video

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you know that I still have some regrets about it

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let's call it that

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now for the past few years YouTube has been a key focus for me

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especially helping others put themselves out there and

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bring their voice to the world

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and help democratize access to

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I believe true education

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now since then I tried another half dozen business ideas probably

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I tried notion templates on Etsy um

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I had sold quite a few

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but keeping up with all the issues that people had

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in terms of installing the template

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and streamlining

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that was not very easy

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so I sort of dropped that I tried print on demand

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I think I actually did that with you guys

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if you've been with me for a while

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I tried selling AI art

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I tried opening a Shopify store selling kids toys made out of wood

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I probably tried a few more

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but I can't recall them now and most recently

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my husband who spent the last 20 years in technology

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he found his passion for AI agents and business automation

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so again

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this is a key topic for us now and if you guys are interested

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I'm happy to tell you a bit more about what we're doing there

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and how that is evolving but if you look at it

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we had to fail loads of times to find success

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so why is failure so important

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I do have quite a few insights that I'd love to share

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and I think it's really really key that you guys pay attention to this

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maybe grab a pen and take some notes because it's super valuable

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what I feel would help you shift your perspective over failure

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I think

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the challenge comes from the fact that most people think of failure

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as this big scary monster to avoid at all costs right

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but I think failure is not only a part of the process

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it is the process right

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and I've Learned it the hard way as you've seen

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and I think the best way that I can explain this is with Mario

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because my son recently has been playing a lot of Mario

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and that got me thinking

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because I truly see failure like playing Mario

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cause when you whatever character you pick

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when your character falls into a hole

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you don't quit you learn

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you know that there's a hole there

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you adapt and then you try again right

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I've never heard of anyone who only tried playing Mario

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or Mario Kart or whatever

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once everybody goes and tries again right

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so why not do that with things that are much more important than a

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game because as you can see

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every single failure taught me something new

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and it turns out that there is actual science behind

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why failure is so powerful

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so let me break it down for you

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and I really wanna start with something

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that I personally find really cool

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and I know I'm a bit of a nerd

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but bear with me that is related to your brain

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because researchers at Stanford found that every single time

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you make a mistake

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your brain fires up it lights up it creates new neural pathways

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which

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basically means that your brain is learning how to adapt and improve

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in real time it's great

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it's it's like workout for your brain right

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and you can think of it like leveling up in a video game

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every time you hit an obstacle

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your brain is figuring out how to beat the level the next time

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and the more you fail

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the faster you learn and the faster you're going to beat the level

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does that make sense now on top of this

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here's something that I personally didn't expect

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but as we were doing the research for this video

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I found that failure actually makes you more creative

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and it makes sense if you think about it

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because also if you look at my example

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when I ran out of cash for my SAS business

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I had to rethink everything from pricing to pitching

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to finding funding and that's not just me being scrappy

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it's science I mean

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there is a study in Nature Communications that found that

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when people face repeated failure

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they are forced to explore unconventional strategies

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so basically thinking outside of the box

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is what only comes out of facing challenges

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and struggles and failing

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think of Thomas Edison right

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he failed 10,000 times before he invented the light bulb

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I mean if it worked for him

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it could probably work for us too right now

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this next piece is coming from a book that I absolutely loved

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that I've read many many years ago

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and I'm sure many of you have heard about it

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and honestly I think this is the tough love part

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failure builds grit and now I'm referring to the book called grit

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written by Angela Duckforth right

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she literally wrote the book on it

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and she found that perseverance

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through failure is a better predictor of success

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more than talent more than IQ or anything else

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so every time you dust yourself off and try again

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you're actually becoming stronger

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a grittier version of yourself

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if you will okay

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so I like this metaphor of exercise or you thinking about it like this

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because it is literally like workout for your willpower

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I know it sucks in the moment to dust yourself off

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I've done it plenty of times as you've seen

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but the results are worth it

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I believe because there is no success without failure

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you have to go through it to learn

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and adapt and change and find the right way

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now I wanna talk about fear

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because failure teaches you something incredible

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it teaches us that it's survivable

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it's figureaudible like Marie Fourliosis right

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and a study in Psychological Science showed that people who fail

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early in life are less afraid to take risks

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later on

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and you need that confidence if you do want to be an entrepreneur

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because they've been through it right

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the people who are now more comfortable failing

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and willing to take risks

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and you will need that as an entrepreneur yourself

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so you need to be able to trust yourself as you do it

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or as you make a decision

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it's like realizing the boogeyman under your bed isn't real right

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once you see the failure won't brew in you

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it stops holding you back

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so look failure is not something that you tolerate

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in my opinion it's something to embrace

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it's something to welcome

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in fact

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it could be something to celebrate because it requires your brain

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it makes you more creative

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it builds grit and it reduces fear

348
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now the question isn't how do I avoid failure

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in my opinion the question should be how do I use it to grow

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and that's what I want to help you figure out today

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I started thinking about this when I heard Sarah Blakely

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the founder of Spanx talking about celebrating failure

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I remember she was telling the story about her dad asking her

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and her brother every single day

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what did you fail at today

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and I thought that's a very odd question in the beginning

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but then I realized that the reason he was asking is because

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failing meant they were trying something new

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and most of the time people fail when they try something new

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but that's okay that's where the learning comes from as you've seen

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failure is only the end if you let it be

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it's only the end when you stop trying

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so I wanted to share with you a simple framework that you can use

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to turn those moments when you feel like failing

365
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into your greatest advantage

366
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so step No. 1 we only have four steps today okay

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so step No. 1 has to do with reframing right

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the way you look at failure

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I think that's super super important you guys

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when you change the way you look at failure

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your entire life is going to change

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because instead of seeing it as a dead end

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you should look at it as feedback most of the time free feedback

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so every failure all it is is a clue

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it's telling you what didn't work so you can figure out what will

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so I want to give you a few actionable steps because whenever you're

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you know facing a setback

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you should be asking yourself what went wrong

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and then follow up that with what did I learn

380
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and what can I try next time okay

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most people stop when they think what went wrong

382
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but you should use that learning

383
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you should use that experience

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that free feedback to try something else the next time

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that's all it is now step No. 2

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I think it's something that took me a little while to understand okay

387
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and that is related to refining your approach by starting small

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00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:17,766
um I can maybe tell you another time

389
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the whole story about how I quit my job

390
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um when I was 25

391
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26 to do this entrepreneurship thing

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I think one of the biggest learnings after that whole experience was

393
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not to risk everything up front

394
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and be able to test your ideas on a smaller scale

395
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to figure out what works before

396
00:18:33,900 --> 00:18:36,066
you're putting everything behind that idea

397
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so my actionable step for you here is to always ask yourself

398
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what's the simplest version of this idea that I can test today right

399
00:18:44,500 --> 00:18:47,466
you don't have to build a full blown course

400
00:18:47,466 --> 00:18:51,233
you don't have to make 100 videos for YouTube

401
00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:54,200
you can start small and gather feedback early

402
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:56,400
and use that to refine your idea

403
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trust me it'll make your life a thousand times better if you do this

404
00:18:59,866 --> 00:19:03,866
step No. 3 is related to the book that I referred earlier

405
00:19:03,866 --> 00:19:06,200
and this is resilience

406
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:09,500
you wanna treat failure like leveling up in a video game

407
00:19:09,500 --> 00:19:10,900
every time you fail

408
00:19:11,166 --> 00:19:15,233
all you're doing is you're getting closer to bidding the level

409
00:19:15,366 --> 00:19:19,400
the key is ready to keep showing up and to try again

410
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:22,366
I know Tony Robbins somebody that I absolutely love and adore

411
00:19:22,366 --> 00:19:27,000
and he's one of my most significant mentors in the last 10

412
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,700
15 years he always says

413
00:19:28,700 --> 00:19:30,766
what do you do when you fail

414
00:19:30,766 --> 00:19:32,933
you try something else it's that easy

415
00:19:32,933 --> 00:19:36,200
it's one of the things that I taught my son when he was really

416
00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:36,966
really little

417
00:19:36,966 --> 00:19:41,100
and he was getting upset for failing at really small things

418
00:19:41,100 --> 00:19:44,000
that's okay you just need to try something else

419
00:19:44,066 --> 00:19:48,333
that's all so one thing that you could consider doing is to create

420
00:19:48,333 --> 00:19:50,366
um you could call it a failure journal

421
00:19:50,366 --> 00:19:54,200
or you could call it a growth journal or a learnings journal

422
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:57,066
but the idea is that you write down what went wrong

423
00:19:57,133 --> 00:20:00,166
what you learn and what you would do differently next time

424
00:20:00,166 --> 00:20:02,700
remember you should not stop after the first question

425
00:20:02,700 --> 00:20:05,366
okay and you can also set short term goals

426
00:20:05,533 --> 00:20:07,166
that will help you build momentum

427
00:20:07,166 --> 00:20:09,466
and it'll help you celebrate those small wins

428
00:20:09,466 --> 00:20:10,466
I'll come back to this one

429
00:20:10,466 --> 00:20:13,666
okay because No. 4 is about reward

430
00:20:13,666 --> 00:20:15,500
it's about celebrating those small wins

431
00:20:15,500 --> 00:20:18,966
because otherwise we get stuck thinking that we keep failing

432
00:20:18,966 --> 00:20:20,566
that we always fail

433
00:20:20,566 --> 00:20:24,133
because our brain is designed to distort and generalize and delete

434
00:20:24,133 --> 00:20:26,700
so if we only focus on the failure

435
00:20:26,700 --> 00:20:28,300
then we don't see the wins

436
00:20:28,300 --> 00:20:33,266
so there is a need in your final step in this framework to learn

437
00:20:33,266 --> 00:20:34,866
to reward yourself for progress

438
00:20:34,866 --> 00:20:36,133
not just for the big milestones

439
00:20:36,133 --> 00:20:38,066
I know a lot of people set big goals

440
00:20:38,066 --> 00:20:41,300
and they expect to only celebrate and be happy

441
00:20:41,300 --> 00:20:42,733
when they achieve those big goals

442
00:20:42,733 --> 00:20:45,600
but the small wins along the way make the biggest difference

443
00:20:45,600 --> 00:20:48,100
celebrating these moments keeps you motivated

444
00:20:48,100 --> 00:20:50,200
and it reminds you how far you've come

445
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:51,333
believe me I mean

446
00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:54,933
I could only look at all the failures over the last 15 years

447
00:20:54,933 --> 00:20:55,733
probably more

448
00:20:55,733 --> 00:20:58,600
but the truth is that I've Learned so much and I've achieved so much

449
00:20:58,600 --> 00:21:00,300
and I had so many success moments

450
00:21:00,300 --> 00:21:03,566
that I can't even think about the failure as much

451
00:21:03,566 --> 00:21:07,200
I only think about it because I intentionally want to recall it

452
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:07,933
otherwise

453
00:21:07,933 --> 00:21:11,366
I look at everything that has happened with a sense of gratitude

454
00:21:11,366 --> 00:21:11,866
honestly

455
00:21:11,866 --> 00:21:15,700
because I would not be here had I not gone through all of that

456
00:21:15,700 --> 00:21:19,566
so maybe in your growth journal or however you wanna call it

457
00:21:19,566 --> 00:21:21,700
you should also ask yourself every day

458
00:21:21,700 --> 00:21:24,333
what did I achieve and how will I celebrate it

459
00:21:24,333 --> 00:21:28,466
and you can keep a wins board where you record your progress

460
00:21:28,466 --> 00:21:30,700
if you want something that you can look at every day

461
00:21:30,700 --> 00:21:31,100
I don't know

462
00:21:31,100 --> 00:21:34,600
whether it's landing your first client or completing a tough task

463
00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:36,466
or something new that you Learned

464
00:21:36,466 --> 00:21:38,566
I don't know it can be as little as that

465
00:21:38,566 --> 00:21:42,200
but it's so important for you to celebrate small things

466
00:21:42,200 --> 00:21:43,900
and you can do it in any way that you want

467
00:21:43,900 --> 00:21:45,200
you can go get yourself

468
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:48,966
a cup of coffee or you can go for a walk or just say

469
00:21:48,966 --> 00:21:50,466
good job me you know

470
00:21:50,466 --> 00:21:52,000
it doesn't have to be complicated

471
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:55,100
but it makes you feel so much better about yourself

472
00:21:55,100 --> 00:21:56,766
alright you guys there you have it

473
00:21:56,766 --> 00:21:59,333
the 4 RS Framework refrain

474
00:21:59,333 --> 00:22:01,300
refine resilience and reward

475
00:22:01,300 --> 00:22:04,966
use this to turn every failure into a stepping stone for your success

476
00:22:04,966 --> 00:22:07,733
I think you will be so much better off if you do apply this

477
00:22:07,733 --> 00:22:10,500
it took me years to really figure this out

478
00:22:10,500 --> 00:22:12,766
and I really want to give it to you guys as a gift

479
00:22:12,766 --> 00:22:14,100
now I wanna hear from you

480
00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:17,600
what is one failure that taught you a valuable lesson

481
00:22:17,600 --> 00:22:22,566
or on the flip side what's something that you have been terrified

482
00:22:22,566 --> 00:22:25,400
you've been scared to try because you might fail

483
00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:27,266
but hopefully now after watching this video

484
00:22:27,266 --> 00:22:30,400
you understand that the worst thing you can do is do nothing

485
00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:32,766
if you do try and fail at least you have the learning

486
00:22:32,766 --> 00:22:35,566
at least you know one way that that thing doesn't work

487
00:22:35,566 --> 00:22:37,533
but you can try another way and it might

488
00:22:37,533 --> 00:22:41,700
now remember the only real failure is giving up so don't stop trying

489
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like this video if you did

490
00:22:42,866 --> 00:22:44,800
be sure to subscribe if you haven't done so

491
00:22:44,866 --> 00:22:47,133
and share this with anyone in your life

492
00:22:47,133 --> 00:22:48,700
who you think could benefit from it

493
00:22:48,733 --> 00:22:51,600
thank you so so much for giving me your time and attention

494
00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:53,566
I'm so grateful every single time

495
00:22:53,566 --> 00:22:55,200
you choose to watch one of my videos

496
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:56,500
I truly hope that they help you

497
00:22:56,500 --> 00:22:58,700
I truly hope that you find them valuable

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00:22:58,700 --> 00:23:01,000
and I hope to see you here next time bye