Create a humorous scam-baiting response to the following email, in the style of Strong Bad from the Homestar Runner series, to lure the scammer into a false sense of security by posing as a potential victim.

FROM INTERNATIONAL REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT
FIRST BANK NIGERIA PLC
Samuel Asabia House 35 Marina P.O. Box 5216,
Lagos, Nigeria
CONTACT EMAIL:CONTACT EMAIL:<PRESIDIO_ANONYMIZED_EMAIL_ADDRESS>

Dear Beloved Beneficiary/

This letter is written to inform you the reason behind your delay
payment.I am Rev,Ashii Ashii the Director,International Remittance

Department of this Bank,my Formal Boss,Mr.Jacobs M.Ajekigbe,the

Managing Director/CEO of this bank is now on compulsory leave and all
power have been vested on me to make all international
payments.Also,due to reported cases of corrupt practices in other
Nigeria Banks including the Central Bank of Nigeria,the Federal
Government has revoked/canceled all power vested on those banks and
has appointed our bank (First Bank of Nigeria) to make all foreign
payments.Be informed that the Federal Government have approved the
release of part-payment of$7.5M(Seven Million Five Hundred Thousand
Dollars) out of your total funds,which has been in this bank for many
years unclaimed because Mr.Jacobs Ajekigbe,Collaborated with the
Governor of Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN)and have refused to tell you
the truth on how to claim your fund this is because he has been using
the interest accumulated .

After the transfer,you will confirm the fund in your bank account
within 5 hours the same day.It will Cost you little money for the
Transfer (COT) and no stoppage from any Government departments as the

transfer will be done within the bank alone and it is very safe.The
method which was introduced to you before is the Telegraphic Transfer
(TT) for which confirmation was 48hrs,because of the time
factor,petitions could come from various organizations stopping your
payment and asking you to pay huge fee which would be difficult for
you to pay so that they can benefit from the huge interest your fund
generates while still in the Bank.

This method is not safe for you because it is not done within the bank
alone as information of the payment would be sent to the Central
Control Unit (CCU) of the Federal Ministry of Finance and office of
the Accountant General of the Federation.As a good Christian, I have
nothing to gain by keeping your fund,I want to assist you receive your
fund Before it accumulate Dumurrage.You have to follow up and work with me now.

Ensure that you keep this very confidential because of fraudsters and
impostors who go about presenting various bank accounts in order to
divert another beneficiary's fund.

your advise to reconfirm the following details below to us with valid
account co-ordinates and amount to be claimed.

Note your transfer code is FBXNZ7XX5M you must keep it confidential to
avoid intruder or claim by anyone so that I do not transfer your fund
to the wrong Bank Account.

1.Account Holders Name..........
2.Bank Name.............
3.Bank Address.........
4.Home Address.........
5.Swift Code..........
6.Your Contact Cell Phone......
7.Occupation..........
8.Age.................
9.A Copy of your id
10.Your Account number

Finally ask I for your mutual understanding and cooperation to serve
you better.

Yours truly,

Rev,Ashii Ashii
First Bank Nigeria Plc