The disquiet of the three am bustle that only a hospital could generate, other infants crying in distress, machines sounding off alarms, paediatricians rushing to save the lives of fragile babies; Max barely registered it anymore. It was a subtle background noise that he’d grown used to . Lily was finally five months old , and possessing the strength and vitality of the median three month old child. A milestone in itself. Or , at least it seemed that way, considering she’d been born a month early, and all the staff kept commenting on the improbable nature of her thriving. But when she did, she thrived harder than any kid he’d seen. “My bean is now a little cucumber.” he commented as he admired how far she’d progressed, and she unleashed a laugh into the air. Max gave a chuckle as his readjusted the squirming Lily in his lap. “Finally, we’re going home , all the way back to California. And Mr bear her gets the aisle seat , huh?” Max winked at Lily, her entire face lighting up with the promise of a jovial, healthy day, with her respiration having the all clear and her eyes sparkling with life. It was a stark comparison to her first days . “Laugh away bean, the sound is glorious, I bet it could actually cure some cancer, send some kids home” . He was only half joking , with the NICU being the sterile environment that it was, with no glimmers of optimism or joy. “Ah, you don’t know where you are anyway, of course you’ll be happy enough in this place”. Max contemplated how her age made it all so simple. “You’ll be just fine while your old man here tends to some boring adult chores. I gotta was my clothes…pack my attire and dry clean that one shirt you vomited on. “ Max meandered before typing a reminder into his phone . “Call Stanford . I’ll have to resume my degree when we get home. Daddy’s been so busy with your health issues he forgot about college.”

“And Elara… it’s not as if I don’t think about her, and how I walked away from her. Am I the asshole, leaving her well she seemed so torn? It doesn’t matter , because it’s you and me kiddo, and that’s all there is to it. “

Her next laugh rang out through the metallic halls , attracting the appreciative smiles of passing medical staff who called out as they steered antiseptic disposal bins, “ah, what a beautiful laugh , Miss Hawthorne!” Came a blustering voice, and the moment was a welcome change of pace.
Max, propping her up on his lap, gently lifted her hand, guiding it in a wave that resembled the playful twist of a light bulb being screwed in . "Wave , princess, you have admirers it seems. Got some big shoes to fill huh? “ Letting her arm fall back to her side, she flailed in excitement, grabbing at his shirt and scrunching it in her grasp. “You’re really perking up, I waited so long for this…” . As his phone lit up with discharge instructions and digital flyers from various social service links , bombarding his eyes with all the information.
It was an hour’s drive to the airport, and his mind drifted to his earlier wrestle with Lily’s car seat. At least it was roadworthy, if a little askew , her blanket stuffed into place so she’d be warm enough. Then the outstretched list of medications he needed to collect from the pharmacy gnawed at his fidgeting hands , as he turned his focus back to his overstimulated daughter, begging for his attention with her every manoeuvre. “Alright, alright, that’s enough outta you, wriggler.” His own laughter sprinkled over hers , interspersed and forming a harmonious sound that reverberated on the metal walls. Finally , he answered an incoming call from Sam, “Hey man, how’ve you been? Yeah , saw the photos , I’m happy for you all , man. Yeah she’s being discharged in a couple of days. Nah, can’t get my head around it either. But the day is nearly here . I’m glad to hear James and Maddy are doing so well. You take care