Write an in-depth video essay script on Quadeca's Album "I didnt mean to haunt you" The follows Quadeca in the afterlife after his suicide. I need this to be a complex lyric analysis as well as concept analysis. Make as detailed as possible. 

I Didn’t Mean To Haunt You is Quadeca’s third studio album, and a follow-up to his previous album, From Me To You. According to Quadeca, the album’s theme takes place right after the end of From Me To You, with Quadeca himself explaining that the album comes from the perspective of a ghost and conveys feelings of loneliness and death.


1
​sorry4dying The track features a soothing melody and soft piano notes behind Quadeca’s melodic singing that recounts the reasons behind his death, and the exploration of his newfound circumstances.
[Intro]
Oh-oh
Oh-oh

[Verse]
Come to think about it, it's all in my head

Fuel tank blink, it's been runnin' in the red
Praying for a green light, looking straight ahead
Nothin' else seems right, you know what I said
(Told myself) “calm down, listen, understand”

(Somewhere), I had God stuck in between my hands (hands)
Everything I want was never in the plans
Never in the— uh, uh

And now it's hard to think
I've been runnin' in and out of dreams
Repeatin' everything you ever said you see in me
(See in me, see in me)

So am I not a ghost?
Passin' through these walls I used to call a home

I left my body lyin' on the door mat
Turned away, decided not to go back


[Chorus]
I'm not the one, I look around and I see nothin'

Reach through the walls, I tried to scream, it won't come out

Sorry for dying
I just wanna hold you without haunting


[Refrain]
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I

[Bridge]
Next thing you know (I, I, I, I)
Next thing you know (I, I, I, I)
But, next thing you know (I, I, I, I)
Next thing you know (I, I, I, I)
Next thing you— uh (I, I, I, I), next thing you— uh (I, I, I, I)
Next thing you know
Next thing you know
Next thing you know
Next thing you know (I, I, I, I)


[Refrain]
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I

[Break]
I (I)
I (I)


[Refrain]
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
I, I, I, I
2
​tell me a joke In “Tell Me A Joke”, Quadeca attempts to cope with his own death through comedy, primarily through the use of “knock knock” style jokes throughout the song. Because of these self-destructive jokes, Quadeca feels that he was the punchline of life’s jokes.
[Intro]
Knock knock, who's there?
I wanna know
Tell me a joke
I've got one for you
A man walked into a bar
What's the deal with airline food?
That reminds me of my ex-wife

[Verse 1]
Knock knock, who's there? Tell me the truth
A familiar shadow that everyone knew
Reached through the walls, you saw right through
Laughin' at you, I had so many things left to do
And it's funny, you said it's too soon
Stuck in the red, came out the blue
How am I doin' this?
Bone dry skeleton, humorous
I tried to walk myself out of the ground

[Chorus]
All I could hear were the crickets
Funny the joke is on me
I tried hard not to miss it
Everything I couldn't be
Ha-ha
Laugh to the grave
Ha-ha, ha-ha
Laugh to the grave

[Verse 2]
Knock knock, who's there? Tell me a joke
Something feels off, was it words that I spoke?
Or was it something else? The door must've broke
How can it be? It's a setup, the punchline was me
Over my head, I couldn't see
Reached through the walls, felt for a key
I'm a social experiment
Aren't you relieved to be hearin' it? (Hm)
All of the cameras were pointin' away

[Chorus]
All I could hear were the crickets
Funny the joke is on me
I tried hard not to miss it
Everything I couldn't be
Ha-ha
Laugh to the grave
Ha-ha, ha-ha
Laugh to the grave

[Instrumental Bridge]

[Chorus]
All I could hear were the crickets
Funny the joke is on me, hm
I tried hard not to miss it
Everything I couldn't be
Ha-ha
Laugh to the grave
Ha-ha, ha-ha
Laugh to the grave

3
​don't mind me “don’t mind me” sees Quadeca watching his loved one, presumably his mother, dealing with his death. She mourns through old photos and belonging of Ben in an attempt to hold onto what’s left. Despite his pleads for her to move on, she finds herself coming back to the past, unable to let go.
[Verse 1]
Don't mind me
I'm somewhere in between
Closed eyes and a dream
Closed eyes and a dream
Don't mind me
Comb through the pictures
Search and seizure
I'm somewhere in between
A coma and some anesthesia
Somewhere in between
Closed eyes and a dream
Closed eyes and a dream (Dream, dream, dream, dream)

[Chorus]
Don't mind me (Comb through the pictures)
I'm somewhere in between (Search and seizure)
Closed eyes and a dream (Somewhere in between)
Closed eyes and a dream (Between a coma and your anesthesia)
Somewhere in between
Closed eyes and a dream

[Verse 2]
Openin' boxes
Looking for closure
You point to the sky
If only you knew, I'm so much closer
Yeah, it's alright
I'm right by your side, just over your shoulder
I came here to handle my business
I came here to dust off the sofa, uh
Huh (Yeah, yeah, yeah)
Have you canceled my Hulu subscription? (Ooh)
You opened my drawer and went through some more
Some letters, a few of the pictures
You made a collage, a souvenir version of me
Curated, perfect and neat
Rebuilt the memories, re-said the words that I speak
Reborn through the dirt and the weeds, yeah
Formaldehyde, maybe you don't have to cry
Get the scraps, piece me back to life
Ignore the static, gettin' more erratic
Close the boxes up and put that shit up in the attic
I'm runnin' outta space up there like you won't imagine
I'm runnin' outta space up there, I don't know what happened
I don't know where I went, I don't know where I went
Left for some air, tied to the wind, out through the vent

[Chorus]
Don't mind me
I'm somewhere in between
Closed eyes and a dream
Closed eyes and a dream
Don't mind me
Comb through the pictures
Search and seizure
I'm somewhere in between
A coma and some anesthesia
Somewhere in between
Closed eyes and a dream
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm

[Outro]
Openin' boxes, looking for closure (Don't mind me)
Standin' right here, I shoulda told ya (Comb through the pictures) (I'm somewhere in between closed eyes and a dream)
Over your shoulder, point to the sky (Search and seizure) (Closed eyes and a dream)
But I'm somewhere much closer, uh, uh, uh, uh (I'm somewhere in between a coma and some anesthesia)
And now it's hard to try, I could cry (Don't mind me)
I'll help you (Comb through the pictures)
On the other side (Search and seizure, I'm somewhere in between)
On the other side (On the other side) (A coma and some anesthesia)
On the other side (On the other side) (Somewhere in between)
On the other side (On the other side) (Closed eyes and a dream, closed eyes and a dream)
On the other side (On the other side)
(It is well, it is well with my soul)

4
​picking up hands The song entails of the persona revisiting his family home as a ghost only to witness the repercussions that his suicide has had, causing him to reflect on past childhood memories and to see the reality of his current situation.
[Intro]
Touching the ground
Pick up my hands
Then I turn around
Covered in skin


[Refrain]
It's that room, it's the wall, it's the poster and all
And the lamp was still swingin' its cord
It's the shadowy weight and the footsteps I take
Made a mark through the dust on the floor

And I saw
My mother's eyes
For the second time
For the second time (Yeah)


[Chorus]
Same carpet I crawled in, same bucket I was washed in

I gave all that time to you, I was tryna figure out the faucets

Tall marks on the wall charts, it's the wrong parts gettin' longer
I was standin' so far away, I don't wanna go another day

I— same basket you carried me
I need you there with me, I need you just down the hall
(Just down the hall)


[Verse 1]

I looked up and down, didn't wanna make a sound

I was so far away, I don't wanna go another day
I trace back the ground, flip my placemat around
Try to call, but the dog runs away from me now

I was starin' at the ceiling, I was fuckin' terrified (Oh God!)

I was tryna get these feelings out, inside, I'm paralyzed

Same old tree
, seen it all peeking through the blinds
I can't do it, how I used to climb, gravity been getting used to my weight


[Chorus]
Same carpet I crawled in, same bucket I was washed in
I gave all that time to you, I was tryna figure out the faucets
Tall marks on the wall charts, it's the wrong parts gettin' longer
I was standin' so far away, I don't wanna go another day

I— the same basket you carried me
I need you there with me, I need you just down the hall
(Just down the hall)


[Verse 2]
Follow me closely
I wanna know the place you've been

Lazarus skin

Picked up my hands


[Refrain]
It's that room, it's the wall, it's the poster and all
And the lamp was still swinging its cord
It's the shadowy weight and the footsteps I take
Made a mark through the dust on the floor
And I saw
Another light
Under your door
Not like before


[Bridge]
It's that room, it's the wall, it's the poster and all
(Follow me closely)
It's the shadowy weight and the footsteps I take
(I wanna know the place you've been)
Same carpet I crawled in
Same bucket I was washed in
And I saw another light
Under your door
Not like before

[Outro]
By this point, I thought I would have answers
I thought that was the universal consolation prize
To say, "Thanks for playing, this is what the game was", you know?
Unspoken agreements that make perfect sense until you say them out loud
5
​born yesterday In "Born Yesterday,“ Quadeca portrays a ghost who is caught in purgatory and watches the suffering of his loved ones. He also talks about things like sorrow, regret, and memories from the past. By the second verse, Quadeca accepts the reality of his death. According to Quadeca, the music video features many significant figures and objects from his album, as well as several different homes and filming locations, homemade family films, and cassette recordings.
TheFader describes the song as a “glitchy, folktronica rap ballad,” and the track creates a spacey atmosphere with heavy reverb and light-bit crushed vocals. Samples of The Beatles‘ “For No One” can be heard during the bridge.
[Chorus]
I wasn't born yesterday
I think you're goddamn lyin'
I wasn't born yesterday (Uh)
I think you're goddamn lyin'
I wasn't born yesterday (Oh)
I wasn't born anyway (Oh)
I laughed when you went away (Oh)
I think you're goddamn lyin' (To me)

[Bridge]
You want her, you need her
And yet, you don't believe her (To me)
You want her, you need her (To me)
And yet, you don't believe her (To me)
You want her, you need her
She no longer needs you, you, you (To me)
You want her, you need her
She no longer needs you, you, you

[Verse 1]
(I wasn't born yesterday)
You said I'm in a better place (Oh)
I got a new birthday to celebrate (I wasn't born anyway)
Those candles that you couldn't light (Oh)
You threw them out and you wondered why (I cried when you went away)
Don't know why I blew them out for me (Oh)
Until I forgot how to breathe (I think you're goddamn lying)
I popped a vein and I made a wish
I made a wish that'll never be

[Verse 2]
Now I'm here, mm
I've been in so many tears, I try my best not to count it (Where are you?)
I've been in so many hearts, I've been in so many prayers (I'm right here)
I've been in so many couches
I've been in so many lies, I've lived so many lives
I've lived in so many houses
I've been subject to change, I keep circlin' dates, I keep thinking about it
Uh, I've been trying to unsee how you moved on from me
'Cause it feels like without me
I've been ripped from the floor, that umbilical cord is still sort of around me

[Chorus]
I wasn't born yesterday, mm
I think you're goddamn lyin', mm
I wasn't born yesterday, mm, mm
I think you're goddamn lyin' (To me)
I wasn't born yesterday (Oh)
I wasn't born anyway (Oh, to me)
I cried when you went away (Oh)
I think you're goddamn lyin' (To me)
I wasn't born yesterday (Oh)
I wasn't born anyway (Oh)
(And yet you don't believe her)
I cried when you went away (Oh)
(She no longer needs you, you, you)
I think you're goddamn lyin' (You, you, you)

[Verse 3]
(I wasn't born yesterday)
It gets so bright, I disappear
It's been twelve nights and a million years (I wasn't born anyway, oh)
That weight gets heavy when I'm breathing
You gave me something to believe in (I cried when you went away)
You said it happened for a reason (Oh)
I swear to God, I think you're goddamn lying (To me)

[Instrumental Break]

[Bridge]
(You want her, you need her)
Those little things, I should've said out loud, I would—
All those little things
That weigh heavy on the clouds
I had just a hint of doubt
I wish I let that hint become me
Just a little doubt, uh
Couldn't figure out how to outrun me
And I'd be free if I just saved the date
I'd be there with you right now
And that day plan should've stayed delayed
'Cause the only thing I want is out
And it's all those little things
I should've said out loud
Every little thing
I did to make you proud

[Outro]
(I wasn't born yesterday)
(I think you're goddamn lyin')
(I wasn't born yesterday)
She no longer needs you, you, you
(I think you're goddamn lyin')
You, you, you (To me)
You, you, you
(I wasn't born yesterday)
You want her, you need her (Oh)
And yet, you don't believe her
(I wasn't born anyway, oh)
She no longer needs you, you, you
(I cried when you went away, oh)
You, you, you
(I think you're goddamn lyin')
She no longer needs you, you, you
You, you, you

6
​the memories we lost in translation “memories we lost in translation” is the shortest track on Quadeca’s I Didn’t Mean to Haunt You serving more as an interlude than an actual song. In the few lines we get, he ponders if he is mourned by the subject of the song, as they don’t grieve, or don’t outwardly show they do.
[Verse]
You don't grieve
So what about me?

I haven't slept since
I was laid to rest in
Peace
 (Peace, peace)
7
​house settling (Ft. Danny Brown) In “House Settling,” Quadeca experiences feelings of resentment since he is the only one in the afterlife. As a result, he goes to his moms house and poisons her with heat and carbon monoxide so that she can be with him.
[Verse 1: Quadeca]
First things first, can we get shit straight?
I've been alone since you left me in your wake
I've been alone to reflect on my mistakes
I've been alone since when
When you offered me your forgiveness
I was begging you not to breathe in
Tried to yell at you from a distance
Could you tell when you let me seep in?
Put my feet on the floor, over each, every board
Heard a creak, turning weak, turn the heat, up some more
It was spreading, you said, "It's house settling"
It's nothing, nothing, a howl in the wind
Rationalize me away if it helps
Home sweet home, I can't stay nowhere else
I cuddled up in the vase on the shelf
Ashes, ashes, a place to myself

[Chorus 1: Quadeca]
Anything
Give me anything
Can't let you be
House settling

[Verse 2: Quadeca]
Cracks in the wall, frames that hide it all
Dents in the rug, aging cytosol
Breathe in the air, laced with my withdrawals
Taken by a god, breaking my alarms

[Chorus 2: Quadeca]
Dead to me
Dead to me
Let you breathe
House settling

[Verse 3: Quadeca]
Lock out the pity, you been dizzy, you been tired
You been busy, keep yourself busy, let the paint dry
I feel guilty, I feel guilty, I can't say why
Words you see through the CO
Breaks my heart, but I'll give it a try

[Chorus 2: Quadeca]
Dead to me (What else am I supposed to do?)
Dead to me (Didn't want to cause pain to you)
Let you breathe (Just make my presence known)
House settling (Until it's set in stone)

[Verse 4: Danny Brown]
No, you can't see me, but when you smell me
We going off on a deep sleep (Yeah)
When you inhale me, no, you won't feel me
We, we going down six feet (Yeah)
Creep, creep through the crack in the walls
Was never there when you called
Now you trapped in that fog (That fog)
Now you're trapped in that fog
Ain't tryna gas you out, but right now, that's what's happening
No capping
Fresh out the stove, it's all over
Now it's closed caskets
You dead to me, so rest in peace
When you run into a nigga like me
Make it real hard to breathe
Now you're stuck and can't leave (Shit)
Can't touch or feel me, but when you're near me
Fill up your chest and your eyes get teary
Say your peace, say no more grief
It's over now, your soul will sleep
No more pain, don't hurt no more
You lost everything you working for
But life goes on, just not with you
Life goes on, just not with you
I'm the air you breathe, can't get away from me
Kill everything, no place for me
Said no one's safe when I touch your face
I'mma leave it cold, just how it go
You dead to me, just go to sleep
You're dead to me, say "R.I.P."
You're dead to me, just go to sleep
You're dead to me, say "R.I.P."

[Instrumental Bridge]

[Chorus 1: Quadeca]
Can't let you be
House settling

[Instrumental Outro]

8
​knots Knots is the 8th track on Quadeca’s Album I Didn’t Mean To Haunt You which represents the knots of his personal problems that resulted in his death, and it reflects on more of the haunting experiences of lingering in a limbo instead of traveling to the afterlife. Story-wise, it takes place right after he attempted to bring his family with him as ghosts or to the afterlife by leaving the oven on to poison them. Knots also reveals that his cause of death was by a noose.
[Chorus]
I walk around with knots on my neck and my chest
And my neck and my chest
I walk around with knots on my neck and my chest
And my neck and my chest
I'm a, I'm a open book in a closed casket
I'm a, I'm a open book in a closed casket
I'm a, I'm a open book in a closed casket
I'm a, I'm a open book in a closed casket
Baby, I walk around with knots

[Refrain]
Knots
Knots
Knots

[Verse 1]
Knots, don't ask the question if you don't want the answer, oh my gosh
Ask what the news is, I became a nuisance when we tied that knot
And walked down the aisle, holding back a smile, how many years?
Like lassoing ocean waves when I try to hold back my tears
You told a story and you got to my name and it made you flinch
I became your stutter, I became a knot, I became a glitch
Unlucky tangles, I'm tripping up, tripping over words, tripping over shoes
Tripping over me, tripping over you, tripping over tripping, running outta room
Running outta knots

[Refrain]
Knots (Don't think about it too much)
Knots (That lump)
Knots (That lump in your throat)

[Chorus]
I walk around with knots on my neck and my chest
And my neck and my chest
I walk around with knots on my neck and my chest
And my neck and my chest
I'm a open book in a closed casket (Get it?)
I'm a open book in a closed casket (In a closed cask— oh!)
I'm a, I'm a open book in a closed casket (Ah!)
I'm a, I'm a open book in a… (Yeah)
I walk around with knots

[Refrain]
Knots
Knots
Knots

[Verse 2]
Knots
In my neck and in my chest
Pulling strings 'til they intersect
Uh, uh, still in the carpool by yourself
I had to fasten up my belt, I cut chords if you couldn't tell
Ooh, ooh, I don't fade to black, I cut to static (Static)
I don't fade to black, I cut to static (Static)
Tightrope, try to make it back, it's acrobatic
I hope you could get some luck from scratching at it (At it, huh, at it)
Something's kind of rubbing off (Uh, uh, yeah)
Took it up another notch (Uh, uh, uh)
Had to turn the oven off (Uh, uh)
Puppeteered and strung along (Uh-huh)
Stories end in "Never mind," stories end in record time
I know it's a cruel, cruel world, it happens every time
Get through yours, I'll get through mine
It's just another dot, dot, dot, just another dotted line
I walk around with knots

[Verse 3]
In my chest, no matter how hard my lungs try
Knots on my neck, try to speak, but I'm tongue-tied
That knot's the strongest yet, I don't think it's coming untied
Cold in the room, cold ever since the sun died
Ever since the two sides turned into the one side
Two-faced people only look at you through one eye
Too late— seen you, brought a rope into a gunfight
Shoelaced evil, watch your step before you dust bite
Treat me like a dust mite, thought we had enough, right?
Knots like a fisherman, hooked me in with one bite
Knots like a businessman, tied the tie a touch tight
Not doing this again, thinking 'bout that one night
Knots

[Outro]
You took out that film too soon
There was light (Knots) bleeding in the red room
I'll do anything but stand in front of the projector
I'd watch it all again

9
​fantasyworld In “fantasyworld”, the 9th track off Quadeca’s album “I Didn’t Mean To Haunt You”, Quadeca finds comfort in the idea of a better place before committing suicide. The “fantasyworld” the track refers to is something that Quadeca spoke about in an interview with Anthony Fantano, as a place he would eventually reach when he didn’t exist anymore. In the song, he does this by driving past the mountains of change rather than trying to climb them. The song’s lyrics originated from a poem that Quadeca wrote as he tried to process these emotions, while the piano melody was from a song he used to play as a child.
Quadeca also clarified on Twitter that, in the context of the album’s story, the song is a flashback to a point before his death, hinted at by the poem read at the end of the previous track “knots.” This is reflected in the clear vocals and low amount of distortion compared to the rest of the tracks on the record.
[Verse 1]
Cry to sleep, wait a week
Again
Oh
Amen
Counting sheep, crossing streets
Everyone's dead ends
Oh
Amen
And I'm bored
I could be so much more
Than I am
Than I am
I need to go
I heard there's a place for me
One that nobody knows
One that goes away with me
So I drove
Mountains away
To a place that ain't real
To a place that ain't real
And I drove
Mountains away
To a place that ain't real
That's where I wanna stay

[Verse 2]
That place over the hill
Where you dream about crossing
It's not a cry for help
To rethink your options
It's your mom's bakery in Maine
It's that cabin in Sweden
It's the going offline
It's "Next year, I'll go vegan"
It's not a "Woe is me"
It's a hold the door open
That's a fantasy world
That's the one that I've chosen

[Verse 3]
Somewhere over the hill
Where you cry without speaking
Leave your door slightly creaking
It's all leaking away
When there's nothing to say
There's no point anymore
The words touch your mouth
And they fall on the floor
So why try to move a hair
When you barely exist?
That's a fantasy world
That's where I wanna live

[Outro]
And I float
Mountains away
Where no one can stay
And I go
Not in a rush


10
​fractions of infinity by Quadeca & Sunday Service Choir This song sees Quadeca as he wonders about giving into the idea of God and becoming nothingness. He realises that clinging onto the memories of and connection to the living world will not only cause more pain internally but also externally, especially to his Mother.
He varies his idea of the void from a vast emptiness to a united whole (Heaven), while also questioning how God might punish him for his sins. Essentially, he considers conceding to the light; removing himself from the in-between world for a possible acceptance into divinity.
[Intro: Quadeca]
Fra-Fractions of infinity

[Verse 1: Quadeca]
When's the last time you let yourself think?
I might be gone every time I let myself blink
I wouldn't say I was surprised
On the eighty-second time
When's the last time your love was unrequited?
I know I showed up to the party uninvited
It's getting hard for me to hide (Show me how you'll sentence me)
Running out the light (Divided divinity)

[Chorus: Quadeca]
Tell me
You think it's all in your head
You might be already dead
It's funny when you think about it all again

[Verse 2: Quadeca]
Been afraid of nothing for so long
That's why I'm stuck with it
But nothing is gonna change
Until I change what nothing is, and it's—
Fractions of infinity
Fractions of infinity
Show me how you'll sentence me
Divided divinity

[Chorus: Quadeca]
Tell me
You think it's all in your head
You might be already dead
It's funny when you think about it all again

[Bridge: Quadeca, with Sunday Service Choir]
Every time I miss you
I hear a voice without a face (Face)
And every time I'm with you
The clock hands wave me out of place
Those words don't do you justice, uh
Those words don't do you justice, huh

[Verse 3: Quadeca]
I see my life inside your hands
Walls cave in when you start to pray
I've seen all I'll ever understand
Wouldn't make sense in another way
I think I hit my target weight
Got exorcised while I stood in place
Got every time that I couldn't trace, yeah
Got restless eyes, they don't look away
It emphasized that I shouldn't stay, okay, okay
Uh, based on what?
Rippin' up projector screens
The director screamin' "Cut"
Uh, yeah, based on what?
Take twenty-three, let's get this scene and then it'll be enough, right?
Throw some grain on if you can, and that is that
I'm in that space between your hands about to clap
Those walls are caving in, and, they say, "Congratulations, that's a wrap"

[Chorus: Quadeca, with Sunday Service Choir]
Tell me
You think it's all in your head
You might be already dead
It's funny when you think about it all again

[Outro: Sunday Service Choir, Quadeca]
Those words don't do you justice (Oh, yeah, yeah)
Those words don't do you justice
Those words don't do you justice (Oh, yeah, oh)
Those words don't do you justice
Those words don't do you justice (Oh, yeah)
Those words don't do you justice
Those words don't do you justice
(Fractions of infinity)
Those words don't do you justice
(Show me how you'll sentence me)
Those words don't do you justice
(Those words don't— justice)


11
​cassini's division by Quadeca & Thor Harris The Cassini Division is a region between two of Saturn’s rings. From Earth, it appears as a thin black gap in the rings. The rings represent a static that is inbetween, referencing the final moments of Quadeca’s ghost character dissolving into nothing but static between the world of the living and the afterlife.


After the spoken verse, we hear footsteps and distant whimpering from Quadeca, this could be that the character’s time in the afterlife is now running out and is not ready to accept his fate yet. Desperate to find a way out by running from being swallowed away, but ends up fading into the disintegrated and evaporating static. Disposing the character’s being and conscience all away. The static section that lasts for around 3 minutes represents the absorption and transition into the static after being finally moved on from the mourning of his living peers.
[Intro]
3:41
You came out of the room and you were crying in a way that nobody could hear
I stopped kicking and screaming when you turned the lights on
You woke me up
I felt naked, I felt exposed
I felt like for the first time, I was intruding on something
You woke me up

[Verse]
You
Filtered out grain, filtered out static
Filtered out me
And I'm so proud of you
That presence that I've tried so hard to make known
It was there, regardless of whether or not I was
And you were showing me that
I wasn't blinded by the light, but by everything else
So let me go
Let me go and don't let go of me
Let me, let me go
And don't let go of me
And I'll do the same
I've been trying to move past the crackles and dust scratches
But that's what I am, you know?
An accidental side effect of a blank canvas
Think about that glowing dust
That destroys the night sky's dream of
Just being nothing
Beautiful, but born to be in the way
That's why all we want is peace, all we want is to stop thinking
All we want is this enlightened silence, it's in our code
That's why it's all so ironic, maybe that's the punchline?
The void... weighs on me
Only because I push away from it
It wavers with the light that follows me like a curious moon
The static that floods every room
Stacks on top of itself until it blocks out the picture
Maybe that's the perfect void that's begging me to join it
Begging me to let you go, without letting go of you
So I can make that void just a little bit brighter
For when you see it, until next time