This is my thesis/topic for my essay on Don't Read The Comments:

Eric Smith shows that racism and sexism is still very much present in the gaming industry because Divya is treated unfairly at her booth, women are missing from important panels about them and people like Chad, the GamesZone employee, make sexist remarks about female gamers/streamers.

I need you to convert the following argument proving my thesis into a body paragraph. It needs to prove my thesis:

Aaron gets upset when he looks at the GamesCon panel about women in games and says, “There are a few other streamers on the panel with her, and it’s in the morning on the Friday of the convention. I can’t help but scowl at the list of panelists, considering it’s supposed to be a discussion about women in games and it looks like D1V is the only woman on the thing.” (Smith, 261) Aaron is upset because the panel is supposed to be about women, but there is only one woman on it. This shows that even when they talk about women, they don’t include many of them, which is an example of how women are still treated unfairly in the gaming industry.

The paragraph MUST be in this format:

Topic Sentence: (1 sentence that explains what you will discuss in this paragraph, without using the words “In this paragraph, this will be discussed…”)



Introduce Quote (Context): (1-2 sentence that gives plot summary from the story, to help understand what your quote is talking about)



Quote: (rewrite the quote from the story here, word for word. Quotes should be 1-3 sentences long)

Analysis: (2-4 complete sentences of how this quote helps to prove your argument, and why it is good evidence to prove your point. This is the MOST important section of your essay!)


Concluding Sentence (1 sentence)

You musts output it with the organizations labels I provided.

Here is a paragraph example to help you understand:

Topic Sentence: (1 sentence that explains what you will discuss in this paragraph, without using the words “In this paragraph, this will be discussed…”)

Divya’s small and badly located booth at GamesCon shows that she is not treated fairly because she is a woman and a person of color.

Introduce Quote (Context): (1-2 sentence that gives plot summary from the story, to help understand what your quote is talking about)

When Divya gets to the convention, she looks for her spot. However, she finds out that her booth is in an undesirable place with other small artists, not in a big important area.

Quote: (rewrite the quote from the story here, word for word. Quotes should be 1-3 sentences long)

Divya explains how “[she] keep[s] an eye out for the number and letter combination that Rebekah gave [her] for where [their] booth is sitting. “ She actually confirms that her booth is “more like a table”. Finally she explains how “[they’re] situated somewhere near the Artist Alley, with a bundle of other speakers and indie artists.” (Smith, 288)

Analysis: (2-4 complete sentences of how this quote helps to prove your argument, and why it is good evidence to prove your point. This is the MOST important section of your essay!)

Divya’s words show that her booth is small and not very important. Being put near the Artist Alley means she’s treated like a minor or less important person at the convention. This most likely happened because of the hate she is receiving for her gender and race. Even though she’s a popular gamer, she’s not given the respect she deserves. It can be inferred from this that sexism and racism are still a big problem in the gaming world.

Concluding Sentence (1 sentence)

Because of this, the way Divya’s booth is setup proves that women and people of color are treated unfairly in the gaming world.


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Do you have any questions before writing?