the end of NUMBER_TOKEN in the midst of all that stress i had some physical problems that developed that did definitely seem to be stress related i've talked about that before that was when i started but just i mean to give them the blurb though well you went i had multiple multiple blindness you know i've had multiple things that are known to be stress induced like skin issues like psoriasis and eczema back issues cannot often so i'd always had those but the straw that broke the camel's back was when i developed central serous retinopathy which is literally when there's like a fluid sac that gets behind your eye and creates a blind spot on your eye in your field of vision and it was first observed or maybe not observed but first sort of recognized and labeled uh when these world war one or two pilots were coming back from war and a bunch of them had this condition because they had been under so much stress so there's reason to believe that it's stress induced and it is not permanent if it happens once it's not unlikely to happen again but anyway i go to the doctor the eye doctor they tell me that's what this is it's going to take you know months for this thing to resolve itself which it did for a while i think i can't remember which eye it was but i basically couldn't see in the middle of my field of vision with one of my eyes you know if it was like it was like black well it was blurry and wavy and made you feel like you're having vertigo and he made a connection to stress or some inner inner mental work i made the connection to stress when i started reading about that condition and i was like man okay i yeah i i guess because i always would say i don't feel stressed because well i'll talk about what my process is and what i've been working on but it was because i wasn't dealing with it in an emotional way i was dealing with it in a physical way i do believe and i don't understand and i don't have the science to back it up but i do believe that there's a natural connection to when you don't process things emotionally that it kind of it finds a way to get out of you and it can rep it can manifest itself physically so that's what led to me having my first appointment in sometime in like late NUMBER_TOKEN so it's crazy to think that coming up on four years of therapy i'm coming up on two years of therapy in like the january february time frame so that means i started like just a couple of months had a couple of in-person sessions before the pandemic hit and we went to zoom meetings and um for for me it's been pretty much every week except when like scheduling challenges or or trips or whatever but yeah the reason why i got into it the best that i can remember is yeah cr christy had um had had a few therapists for many years and had had been very open and experienced the benefits of that of going to therapy back back home in north carolina and then out here when we moved out here and like uh all of the all the stresses and everything associated with that um therapy re-entered her life and you know we always had a really positive
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