I live on a limited income that has not improved since the economic crash of 2008. As a result, a home I purchased and intended to move into dropped by almost 40 % in value while my income dropped almost 60 %. As a result, I was not able to move into my home and had to rent it to make the payments. 

Over time I tried to hold onto the home. But the market being so poor meant I could not charge very much in rent. Thus, I was making payments out of my own pocket to hold onto the home even though it was rented. After 5 years I ran out of money. 

In the meantime, the new laws that were beginning to provide homeowners some relief gave me some hope that I might be able to work with my lender, XXXX XXXX XXXX, to refinance the home to a level of payment that I could afford. With the new laws, if I could demonstrate financial need, then it would be easy. That was until XXXX XXXX XXXX sold my loan to Select Portfolio Servicing. This is where the nightmare began. 

I am pretty educated. Went to college, live on my own. I am familiar with filling out applications for a variety of services and things I have wanted throughout my life. However, for as much as I tried, Select Portfolio Servicing put me on a merry go round that lasted over two and a half years constantly asking me for more paperwork, all while trying to foreclose on my home, destroying my credit and the entire time, denying that they were doing any of that. 

I finally had to call an old friend who was an attorney to see if that would help. It did get things moving a bit more in the right direction. They could of course lie to me over the phone. But they did n't seem to want to make that same mistake with an attorney. So, another 7-9 months passed and after sending them mountains of paperwork ( which by they way they had received numerous times before ) they finally told me I was approved for a trial modification, but they could n't tell me the terms and I had to start making the new payments immediately. I wanted to hold onto my home. So I took the chance. 

It is now 3 months later and I finally got my loan modification agreement. The best way I can describe it is an absolute joke. This is supposed to KEEP me in my home? 
Here are the broad strokes.. 

- I went from a 30 year loan to a 40 year loan. 
- My annual percentage rate stayed the same at an astronomical 6.2 percent ( the current national average for a 30 year fixed is at 3.75 % ) - They took the amount I had n't paid yet and tacked it onto the entire original note. So I was now paying the payments I had n't made over the past couple of years XXXX. 

All of that, believe it or not, I felt I could live with. As long as the payment was low, I could begin to rebuild my credit and move on with my life and work towards getting into my home some day. 

Except - there was XXXX final term. And here is where, after all this time and everything I had been through - my heart sank. 

The final term in the modification. - At the maturity date of the loan - in XXXX, when I am almost XXXX years old and after I had paid them almost {$200000.00} for 22+ years, to finally settle the loan and keep my home, I would have to give them a final balloon payment of {$46000.00}. 

I 'm pretty emotionally destroyed at this point. After all that, they expect me to pay them money on a home for a good XXXX of my life, and then somehow magically come up with a final $ XXXX when I am about to retire and ca n't work anymore? So after all this, if I ca n't do that then I would lose the home anyway. Only now they would have a lot more of my money. 

I do n't understand how this is legal. How it was allowed in the first place and continues to be with no XXXX doing anything about it. What am I supposed to do now? I 'm not homeless. But signing this deal will make me so when I am at my most vulnerable in my life. 

I am ashamed to be an XXXX today. The XXXX dream is dead.