Thread: Insanity~

I say that everyone should make those personal decisions for themselves and that it's alright to cheat for those special occasions if you can handle it. You have to enjoy yourself at least once in a whilejust so long as you don't justify the hell out of once in a while to become something that it's not. Personally, I've found I simply cannot be trusted at this juncture to stick to the mantra I can taste and enjoy a little bit of this and save the rest I don't have to eat all of this right now. They had donuts in the breakroom the other day and my plan upon grabbing one was to eat 13 of it and save the rest for my next break. In seconds after the first bite, the decision wasn't even made before the entire thing made it's way down my throat, along with another one as well. I went out to an Italian place a couple weeks ago with some family and got the chicken parmesan with a side of fettuccine alfredo with sauteed mushrooms. I tried to go with that same philosophy but after the first bite, it morphed into I'm going to be disappointed with the scale when I get home just from one bite of this anyways... Might as well eat the whole thing... added onto Oh, God! I don't want to bring this home with me! I don't want leftovers! I must get rid of it! Om nom nom nom! I simply haven't formed enough self control to make it worth it to enjoy myself a little because I end up binging on bad crap and forcing myself a hundred steps back from where I've worked so hard to be. That being said, I applaud people who have restraint enough not to go crazy when they get within a few feet of something nutritionally void yet oh so tasty. It's your personal journey and the focus and goals are yours. I've recently stopped eating things in the nightshade familytomatoes, potatoes, eggplant, peppers because I've noticed they make me feel anxious and I get irrationally sad about the stupidest crap. That is my main motivation with this. Sure, the weight loss and self-confidence are a nice prize, but I do not like the way certain foods make me feel, particularly when I know I'm being irrational but I'm on a chemical rollercoaster that is hard to stop once it starts and hard to prevent because I have no idea what will trigger it. There have been very few instances of my depression returning since I started eating veggies and it usually happens only when I cave to temptation. So, that's another thing that I have to weigh in for myself. Not just, Can I enjoy just a little bit of this, but how much of this can I eat before it makes me feel like crying about everyone possibly hating me, despite evidence saying otherwise? Add onto that the stomach aches and the fatigue that accompanies these cheats and it simply is not worth it to test how much I'm learning from my mistakes just yet. Although, I do agree on needing a personal whipping motivator. If you happen to find somebody affordable and inconspicuous who can follow me everywhere, I will totally get that. Develop self control through trauma or habitual response, like Pavlov's dog, so even when the personal motivator is gone, the fear of being whipped if I eat that junk food stays with me. This sounds like a good plan. Does somebody want to look this up on Craigslist? I think searching for psycho life coach might get results closest to what we're all aiming for, right? XD