Thread: Which OC would?

Characters Jackie Sparrow, Jenny Sparrow, Kieran Shane, Anne Marie LaMonte, May Swift-Palmer, Fenny Balloch, Hamish Balloch, Erik Heinz-Schmidt, Olivia Baccharin 1. most likely to clean up everybodys crap without asking Fenny 2. most likely to get in a fight Hamish and Kieran 3. most likely to fall asleep literally anywhere May 4. most likely to get a crap-ton of tattoos Jenny towards the end, May 5. most likely to get a really crappy tattoo and immediately regret it Fenny 6. most likely to survive the zombie apocalypse Hamish and Fenny. I think Jenny's more likely to cause the zombie apocalypse 7. most likely to be two hours late to their own event May, Jackie 8. most likely to flirt to get what they want Anne Marie, Kieran 9. most likely to laugh at a funeral Anne Marie 10. most likely to look really good in a kilt Hamish refuses to wear anything but a kilt, and doesn't give a damn if you think he looks good in it 11. most likely to steal free samples Jackie, Olivia 12. most likely to take selfies at inappropriate times Jackie, May 13. most likely to ruin everything Kieran 14. most likely to have a shotgun wedding Hamish 15. most likely to laugh until they cry Erik 16. most likely to get into an argument with an animal Jackie 17. most likely to use any and all excuses to take off articles of clothing May, Jenny, Anne Marie 18. most likely to prank call people Kieran 19. most likely to binge-watch Netflix for absurd lengths of time Olivia 20. most likely to sing better than expected Hamish 21. most likely to get attacked by a bird Anne Marie 22. most likely to sleepwalktalk Olivia 23. most likely to drop obscure references nobody understands Anne Marie, Jenny 24. most likely to go to a party just for the food Fenny, Hamish, Erik 25. most likely to make questionable fashion decisions May 26. most likely to be talented in surprising ways Erik 27. most likely to listen to one song for four days in a row Olivia 28. most likely to eat cake for breakfast May, Hamish 29. most likely to go bridgecliff-jumping Jenny 30. most likely to have had an embarrassing middle-school emo phase Jackie With the help of some supporting characters... KieranOlivia Im straight. ColinViola Hey. KieranOlivia So it turns out Im not straight. Kieran Wait, you like me for my personality? Colin Yeah, it shocked me as well. Jack What. The. Fuck. MayYoull have to be more specific. I do a lot of what the fuck kind of stuff Jackie if you think Im not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me Kieran Sam, youre a lovely woman but I came over to eat pizza and fuck your brother. And youre out of pizza Hamish My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words I probably shouldve thought this through typed over and over. Kieran How do I carry myself in a way that says I swallow? MayJenny Update I may or may not be in a cult MayJennyUpdate 2 I may or may not be the leader of said cult Anne Marie If he thinks I'm cancelling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming. Erik Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but Kieran seems to think that we should run towards it dick-first Jenny Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated. Hamish Can now check off Start Bar Fight with my Dad off my bucket list. Jackie I think i was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these three really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join. Erik I mean its up to you where you want to sleep but Im telling you youre going to hear us have sex no matter what room youre in. Kieran Fair enough. Anne Marie You know, I am really starting to enjoy being everyone's first gay experience. Hamish Jesus, You make out with one twin and sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you. So sensitive. Erik Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am. Anne Marie That would explain the cannon. Hamish Ill do whatever I want when Im 80. Fenny If youre still alive when youre 80 Ill demand a medical explanation. KieranHamish trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this guy is up to shady shit. Jenny at this point I think youre judging my taste in men Jack I swear Im not Jenny Its okay, Im judging my taste in men JennySometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face. Anne Marie So uh Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as tortured soul? Jenny The nights not a success unless at least 60 of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning. Jackie I dont know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often. Erik Ive seen you dance and lets just say its a good thing you dont have a small dick Fenny Dude chill patience is a virtue. Hamish WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CANT HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE? sidenote I think this was an actual conversation at some point. Kieran I love him. He's like the brother i never had that I kind of want to fuck. May So youre not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go. Hamish Im not totally useless You can use me as an example of what not to do Anne Marie If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it. Kieran you said I shouldnt try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works Jackie As a general rule of thumb, I dont call until the claw marks have healed. Olivia She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper. May Im gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset Anne Marie Come over. Algernon Look lady I cant have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.