Thread: [KylarStern & Tortoise] Dancing With Myself;;

He had grinned and squeezed her hand when he heard her light hearted reply and the following question. ??Of course you are and you know you can tell me anything!? he replied. But the moment she began, his heart had filled with dread. He had tried his best to remain stoic as she told him of her fears and doubts. It was ironic really, that she should be asking him for advice about whether or not she should be marrying another guy. He couldn't believe his ears. For a moment there, fantasies of the two of them together again, rocked through his mind. It was as if all his hopes had been realized and nothing else mattered. Not the years of separation or the depression or the pain... none of it mattered at all. If only he could hold her again like he used to. Whisper sweet nothings in her ears and listen to her giggles and see her blush like he used to... and hear it back from her, the one and only person who ever mattered to him. The one and only person he could ever love? But he knew that this was a dream too good to be true, and that if he wasn??t careful, it was going to be darkness all over again. And there was no saying, if he??d be able to make it back out a second time. But he also knew she wasn??t toying with him. She was truly of two minds about this marriage and it was killing her. The thing was, he didn??t know what to say to her. Any other friend might brush it of as pre-marital jitters and try to assure her that she was making the right choice. But he knew one thing. This time around, if she were making a mistake, he didn??t think she??d be able to pull herself out of the marriage. Unlike the case with their nuptials, if this one should go south, she??d sink with it. When she had left him, it was for a life that had been her dream for as long as she could remember. This was something he had always understood, and so was never able to truly hate her for what she had done to him. He understood her. It hadn??t made her leaving any easier to bear, but it was the reason he still hung that ring around his neck. To him, a part of her would always be close to his heart, just as a part of him would always be missing without her. He had to think carefully before he answered. He could tell her right now, that he thought she should call the whole thing off. But even he had to question his own motives for that. Was it in the hopes that he could get back together with her? Or was it truly what he believed was best for her? He also knew, that without ever having met the said James in question, he had no idea what kind of a guy he was. But the very fact that she was here alone, when now was when she needed him the most, suggested a certain callousness that Nathan could not tolerate. Not when it involved her. Also, what would she think? ??Dee? I??m not sure I??m the right guy you should be asking? but, I??ll tell you this?? he had stopped and turned her round so they were facing each other. He still held her, his hands on her arms just below her shoulders, ??for as long as I??ve known you, you have always followed your heart?? his eyes drooped for a moment as he added, ???even when it took you away from me.? But as he looked up again he was smiling once more, even if it was only for her ??And right now, no matter how hard you try not to show it, I know your heart is even more broken, than your leg. And it doesn??t feel like any of the answers are there?? his hands slipped up to cup the sides of her face gently caressing her cheek with his thumb, ???but they are. You just have to trust yourself.? He realized how intimately close they were standing to each other and very reluctantly started to pull back. They really weren??t all that far from the campus, and it wouldn??t do to be seen like this. Nobody else knew their history, after all. As he straightened he said, ??I can say one thing though. It??s best that you address these doubts sooner? rather than later, if you know what I mean? They were at the Deli. Still, he waited for her to indicate that she was ready to go in. He didn??t know if his answer had helped her at all. But he knew that there was no way he could make an impartial decision for her. This decision was hers to make... and only hers.