Thread: Memoirs of a Real Life Lover, Wife and Slave (Feel free to comment, post, PM, etc.)

RE Memoirs of a Real Life Lover, Wife and Slave Dear Blue Moon Diary, After what feels like forever, I've finally mustered up the courage to begin writing a fanfic. While it wasn't the firstoriginal one I had in mind, I'm very content with how it's been turning out all the same. I've been posting it up on fanfiction.net under the same user name since I know not everyone's a Naruto fan here. I'm so ecstatic. I've gotten positive feedback and followers on this. It's a mere bonus but the fact each chapter's been over one thousand words minimum has only boosted my confidence. I never thought it'd turn out half as decently as it has thus far ... I'm glad to be wrong for once. Tomorrow ... is going to mark ten years since Granddaddy left this world. Even now typing on it, I'm ... torn. There's the selfless part of me that's glad he isn't suffering anymore from the cancer. And then there's the selfish part of me that still wants to give him one last hug or say goodbye one last time since I never got to. I should be happy, I know, to have been able to move on at all. It's been anything but easy, but the pain lessens more and more each year. All the same, it never fully goes away either. In fact, I could probably still be mourning a bit - only really to the point of just missing him and Nana - even 10 or 20 years later. I was that close to them both and the fact I was their eldest grandchild did not help me out. Sometimes they were more like a second set of parents than just grandparents. And I could go to them a lot, especially after having fights with my actual parents and seek out another voice or two for comfort, advice, both even. And I've missed not having that anymore. It didn't help neither lived to see me at least graduate. They never got to know of Vein or their great-granddaughter ... and at least with the latter, I wish they had. I know they probably know of her from above in the Heavens .. but sometimes these sort of things are more special to be able to see corporally. Even my dad's dad got to know her a bit before he passed a few years ago himself. Whether he remembered her well or not ... I doubt, due to his dementia. But still .... does it make any sense at all? Even now, I'm trying to plan ahead on ways to be able to cope and handle tomorrow. A good crying fit honestly just seems like the easiest way to go. Me and Vein are going to see about spending the weekend over in Charlotte since we have to make a payment on the car today, probably in a few hours. But this time, I'm taking my laptop with me to be able to keep up with posts and such. I'd like to believe that they're watching me ... proud of what I have been able to accomplish - in life and writing. But sometimes, I wish I had a more definite answer, a more definite way to know. Goddamn, I miss them ..... Gone, but certainly not forgotten .... neither of them will be. But perhaps the best quote was the one I found from a magazine. I can't remember the article it was originally written about, but the words matched Granddaddy so well .... so I cut it out and placed it upon a collage we made for his funeral in between some of his pictures. Love or hate him, everyone knew him. Gods was that so true. He wasn't just my grandfather. He was a Korean War Veteran ... but perhaps most importantly, my hero, my source of strength. It's where I got my work ethics from ..... along with so many other things .... sobs Until next time, LadyYunaFFX2