Thread: The Asset - Avengers (Moon Struck Fox & Defiant)

Bucky didn't smile but Steve was. He loved talking about the old days, once he'd gotten over everyone's death anyway. Being able to talk about it was a new development if he was being honest. And then, to talk about Phil, Bucky was probably the only one who could ask without getting glared at. The pain was fresh still, Steve had never handled emotional pain well. Tony had helped with the loss of people from before he was frozen, Sam helped him with everything else. Especially Phil. Sam, Steve didn't know where he'd be without Sam. He was thankful no one else, not even Tony or Bruce, realized how close Steve had come to trying to figure out how to end a super soldier. Life had been too hard until the events that had lead to the discovery of Buck. I know you don't remember, and that's okay Bucky. He promised the man before flinching at the reminder of Bucky's 'death'. i never forgave myself for failing to save you. He admitted softly. It was made even worse after I crashed the plane and woke up. I realized, at the time, that if I had jumped off after you, I would have survived. He admitted, watching Bucky close for any signs of real distress. It all seamed to be going mostly okay. Fear. Steve shuddered at that ad then shook his head. we'll take you to some places we used to frequent. Most of them are old and run down and abandoned now but it might trigger a few memories. And i'll tell you all the stories you want to know. he promised. you'll remember in time Buck, you just have to be patient and not push yourself too hard. he blushed brightly when Bucky told him he was someone important and he fidgeted. It wasn't that he was ashamed, but, well. He was. Being... that way, had been a death sentence back then, and while it was much, much better now people still got into huge fusses over it. He shook his head, trying to focus. Jesus... Steve whispered, taking Bucky's hand again, holding him because he couldn't stand to let Bucky face that kind of trauma on his own. i couldn't stand the idea of you not knowing me. he admitted. i couldn't stand the idea of having to kill you because 'there was no other choice'. I couldn't bring myself to... to hurt you permanently. I had nightmares, you know. About that plane, about choking you. For a good long while I thought you where dead all over again, drowned or bled to death or something. When Tony sent me a picture of you, I knew that it would be okay, someday. he admitted with a smile before looking at him. you'll always be worth it, Bucky. Worth the pain, and trauma, and bad jokes. You where always full of bad jokes. he admitted with a smile. your worth everything to me. It took every ounce of control I had to punch you. he admitted. my whole life, it was you who was protecting me, even during the war. You where always there, at my back and b my side, protecting me. he admitted. and not just from people, but protecting me from myself too. he admitted, smiling at Bucky before snorting and shook his head. no. I just felt... weird, trying to figure it out without Phil there to help. he admitted. I have a CD collection instead. he admitted. and Tony loaded all of the songs I like into an MP3 for me. I don't use it much but i'll listen to it while i'm jogging sometimes.