Thread: What WriteMood is Writing

I'm feeling much better today. I want to personally thank Dare for her kind messages and letting me dish some of my heart out. I really appreciate it. Many good things have happened since I wrote the last entry. I was assigned a new author to work with over the weekend. One of my other authors is fastly approaching her release day and it's an exciting time for her and myself. I also pitched an anthology idea to my boss, who is allowing me to place a call for submissions on it. It will be seven volumes total and I can't believe he's allowing me to head such an immense project even though I'm one of the newest editors. He's also since asked me to start helping with advertising our press as well as the sister press. Quite a big deal, if you ask me. My husband came home two weeks early. He kept in steady contact while gone instead of pulling away like he normally does. When he saw me after walking off the ship, he laid a kiss on me that stole my breath away, in front of everyone. It was heart warming to feel that love and desire from him once again. I suppose, after speaking with my therapist Monday, I've come to realize something. His cheating on me actually improved our relationship. I'm not suggesting my route of coping with it to anybody, by any means, but seeing me on that hospital bed dying really changed him. He's far more aware now of his emotions towards me and seems a lot more involved with forging a future together. Where once, if I asked his opinion on something like a quilt, he used to shrug and say Whatever you like, I like. Now, he gets avidly involved with decisions in the house, and it may just be me, but he seems a lot more interested in spending time with our two sons as well. He's talking to me again, like he did years ago when we first courted the idea of a relationship. We're considering writing together as a husband and wife team under a pen name a genre I don't already write of course, so I'll still have my own writing. While gone, he made me a beautiful advertisement banner for my writing. It was very sweet and unexpected, plus an apology, I suppose, for trying to point the gun at my writing as the source of our problems. In the past, he still had that young mentality of I want to barhop, have one night stands, spend my money without a care, and disappear when I feel like it. Since the incident, he's really settled down. He finally seems happy with our quiet lifestyle of home-cooked dinners, fidelity with only his wife, spending money on items as a family though we still do random buys like books, movies, recently a ferret, and keeps in touch on a constant basis. In short I believe that over time our marriage may be whole again. I'm able to start writing again and wanting to. Little bits and pieces, but far better than nothing. I'm able to let him hold me again without crying and feeling like I sorely lack in someway. I'm able to get on here without feeling the overwhelming urge to message the woman. I don't know if she reads this and feels guilt over how close she came to destroying our marriage. I don't care anymore. In a way, I suppose I need to thank her. If it hadn't been for her, I'm not sure my husband ever would have opened his eyes and seen the wrongs he was committing and made a choice about what life he wanted.