Thread: Alien

Cat Diaries Leon and Bourbon Alien Encounter Life chapter 1 Leon Today wasn??t a very good day for our owner. She spent most of it sleeping, it what appeared to be a depressed state- Bourbon She wasn??t depressed! She yelled at me for at least an hour! Leon That??s because you kept trying to eat her chocolate cake! Obviously a clear sign that she was depressed. Bourbon ?How can you tell? Leon I??ve noted in my scientific studies that humans will eat wretched things when feeling a bit stressed. Bourbon ? But she eats those round-doughy-turd looking things about every morning. Leon Those are cookies, and she??s eaten those for the past three days and nothing else, which proves that my scien- Bourbon Anyway, I thought I??d cheer her up with a gift. As she was staring blankly at the wall.. Leon You? I presented the present, formally. Bourbon It only looked formal because you??re black and white and therefore, you look like you??re wearing a tuxedo. Leon Don??t bring race into this you raccoon looking feline! Bourbon But- you.. You? I Leon We presented her with pink panties! Bourbon Which I took. Leon ?They weren??t new? Bourbon No? I took them from the drawer. Leon But, I gave you funds. Bourbon We ran out of kitty litter! Leon ? Bourbon I got some grass too. Leon Grass? Bourbon Nip? Leon I certainly am not going to bite- Bourbon Cat nip. Leon Right. Bourbon Upon our presentation we noticed something odd! Leon It was an artificial intelligence. Possible on our level of brain activity. Bourbon Right, it went like this I was camouflaged? Leon And he saw something move. He didn??t know what it was, so he called me over. ??YOUR GREAT LEON HE SAID!? Bourbon That??s not what I said! Leon Details. Bourbon I had found it, under the dark desk of our pet, where she would usually put her feet, curled up in a blanket. I said to him, ??What is it?? Leon I came closer, to see what Bourbon meant. Then I realized, he was talking about the Q-tip he often stole from our pet. ??It??s a Q-tip? I says. Bourbon But, I said it wasn??t. I said, ??Look harder!? Leon I admit to not seeing at first what he meant. Bourbon So I had to separate it from the Q-tip, so he could see what I was myself, looking at. Leon I was very proud to realize my young student had discovered something amidst our homely environment. Leon I stayed back to take notes as my fellow scientist studied it. Bourbon I??m the one to the right, look at me go! Why are her shoes laying about? We have to talk to her about that. Leon This coming from the cat who pees on towels. Bourbon ?It started to run. Leon Right, it started to run, so we casually followed, to observe it in it??s natural state. Bourbon I decided we needed to run some tests, discover this alien. Placing the Q-tip next to it, you can see that it was a fairly large specimen. Leon Not that we use Q-tips for official measurements, but you have to be resourceful, working in the field. Bourbon After some prodding I decided it was dead, I left Leon to watch it as I found a proper place to dispose of it. Leon It had a horrible smell, so we decided to burry it within our box. Bourbon The litter box. Leon But, then we discovered, the creature was indeed intelligent! It had feigned death! So, I had to send Bourbon to do the dirty work and dig through our? unmentionables to fined the critter. Bourbon It was horrible, but I did what was expected to me. I stuck my whole head in. Leon When we found it, it was still alive. We attempted to interrogate it. Bourbon Actually, we decided the best way to communicate was to stare menacing at it. Leon It??s a JedI mind trick. Bourbon EVENTUALLY, Leon decided to brave the real world and touch the alien, it was meant to be torture for answers, but it came off more consoling Leon I had no rubber gloves on hand, there??s no telling what disease that alien had! I mean, you smelled it! Bourbon I admit it being fragrant, but it was a bit crunchy, I could tell it had a gushy inside, much like-- Not that I had it in my mouth. That would be unwelcome territory if it was a here for negotiations? Leon You? disgust me. Bourbon I?. I?.. Leon Ick, anyway, the creature had a very bad smell. So, I thought if I hit it enough it would stop smelling. Bourbon But, it was a coward and decided to try and flee again! Leon Thank Goodness Bourbon was there to stop it. Bourbon That??s the nicest thing you??ve ever said to me? Leon Oh.. Gee, don??t get all kitten on me. Bourbon Right right, continue. Leon It made a dash for Bourbon, angry at our attempts to find peace, or send it home in pieces. Bourbon But, I dodged! Nimbly! And went to get mommy. Leon Who killed it with a romance novel. Bourbon Leon, do you think we are the only one??s on this planet? Leon No, I often hear mumbles from outside the bounds of our world. Bourbon Behind the wood door? Leon The scientific word is, ??The Door to the Worlds.? Bourbon That??s a sentence. Leon The point is, if aliens can get in, we can get out. We have to time our escape. Bourbon To the closet to plot! Leon To the closet!