Thread: Sexual Star, Amateur at Love (Javorcek X ClearSight)

Conversations of art and hobbies were truly lovely, they allowed Elle to relax and it felt more normal and she wanted it to stay that way, almost as much as she wanted to finally get the conversation they both knew was coming to be over with. She took a deep breath, sighing when it finally came up, the question of her work. At first those lies she told people started to rise to the surface. She began to think about her convenient little lie, how she worked for a software company programming code all day, exhausting work but it paid well. The words she had learned in order to make it sound believable, and everything else she had fabricated in order to make the lie a little more real. This time was different though and it should have been that way in the first place, but Elle hadn't been confident enough in herself to tell the truth, even when she had loved her job. Oh damn, this was seriously the most difficult thing sh could imagine, and she took a moment, even sipping her wine just to buy herself a little more time, anything to give her a moment to phrase what all she had to say. In the end none of that mattered, she just had to go for it, that was what Alex wanted anyways and she needed to be honest and thorough, no lies and no holding back. Heh... Well... This is where things usually go downhill for me. She laughed nervously, as genuinely nervous as she would have been on the real first date. I work in the porn industry... I'm a pornstar... She flinched just saying it, because really she hadn't told anyone new that in a very long time, and it was never easy. I do a good deal of different scenes... All lesbian but varying in the nature of the scenes... Though they are generally soft scenes... She took a deep breath, chuckling nervously before locking eyes with Alex again. So, uhm... Heh... I usually don't share that, people tend to judge harshly one way or another, but there it is. I make good money and it can be interesting work. I've been doing it since I was young, I moved out here because I was interested in the business. She took another sip of wine, trying to think of what to tell Alex, what her lover wanted to know and of everything she should have said when they first met, though at that time nothing seemed like it would last so it didn't matter. My parents are the main reason I've done well though. They supported me despite my... Less than ordinary career choice, and it has been hard work but it's all I know at this point. She shook her head, trying to loosen herself up, though not too hard, she was careful of her injury. Then she looked up at Alex, part of her wanting to make the situation lighter, and perhaps just get a little tit for tat. She didn't change the topic though, no matter how much she wanted to. No, Elle just looked at Alex, giving it a moment to sink in, though she had already figured it out, and then asking the question she had been wanting an answer to since they first met, but one she had never been able to ask before. What do you think Alex? Can you bring yourself to love someone like me? I mean, it may sound like a stupid question, but I've been with a good deal of women who acted like they could handle dating me, and not a single one of them could deal with it in the end... They either broke my heart or simply ran before anything happened... Are you different? A begging tone, pleading for Alex to say yes, that she could handle it, or at the very least for her to just ask some damn questions and keep the conversation going. She needed it to be alight, and while it may not be their first date, it was the first time everything had been out in the open, the first time Elle had opened her job up to the woman she loved.