Thread: What Might Have Been (AndNich123 & Reydan)

In the days that followed, she sat before the NTSB board explaining her actions, her decisions, knowing these people were judging every word that came from her lips. From the moment she walked into the room, she was under a microscope. A plane, costing an astronomical cost, had been destroyed. She knew that in their eyes, that was far more important than her life. That easily took the place of lives that had been lost that day. She wanted to hate them, to lash out at them. Granted they were doing their job, but they could have stopped and had one ounce of respect for the lives lost that day. They were lives she would never forget. Someone had to pay for the aircraft that had been lost. As far as she was concerned, the debt had already been paid. It was paid with her nightmares. It was paid with loss of life from those that had perished that day. Where they wanted to see green, she only saw red. She knew the decision would not be handed down within a week, or even a month for that matter. It always took a long time for board to reach a decision. In that time, she would be allowed to fly, but that was the last thing she wanted to do. Nothing seemed to fit. Nothing seemed to be what she wanted to do. She left the courtroom on the last day of the trial that involved her presence. A decision would be handed down was what she had been told. That literally gave nothing away, and in a sense, she was relieved. If she was found at fault, it would mean she would have time before those words were spoken. On the other hand, she had to deal with not knowing. That was a small factor in comparison to everything else she had on her plate. Cameras flashed, capturing her expression of forced relief and some semblance of happiness. Once more things seemed to be moving in slow motion. Each flash illuminating the space and blocking out the faces behind the cameras. Voices shouted out questions to her, questions that caused the man beside her to raise his hand. He was charged with escorting her from the courtroom to a waiting car just outside. No, she whispered to him, drawing his attention. I wanna..speak. He lowered his hand and gave a nod to her and the crowd of reporters. I want to thank..everyone..for coming. All the statements..have been given, and I dont..want to talk about that. What I do want to talk about..is the loss of life that day. To the families..I cant imagine your pain. I am..so sorry..that I couldnt save them. To say I tried..doesnt bring them back..or give you much support..but know that I did..try..with everything I am. Theres not a day..a moment..a second..that goes by..that I dont think of them. I hope you find peace. She felt the hand of the man beside her on her back, comforting her and yet urging her towards the exit. What will you do now, a voice called out to her. It was something she hadnt made up her mind about yet. She looked up towards the crowd, and as the flashes once more lit up the space, she began to realize that this city would never let her rest. It would never slow down. It would never want to hear her words of sorrow to the family. They, it, would only want to hear the harrowing story of the failed flight. She would never be able to begin to move past this, to move forward. Home, she whispered. It had occurred to her, in that moment, that would be the only place that she could find some sense of peace. It was the only place she could try to reconnect with who she was and remember where she came from. Im going home, she told them before allowing the man to usher to the car.