Thread: Free story idea share and critique thread

As promised, here's what's been swimming in my head lately. --------------------------------------------------------- Leave it all on the Table - Vegas waitress X Childhood friend He's come to Vegas on business, wining and dining a foreign client in the pinnacle of extravagance. Luckily it's all on the company's dime. She, a childhood friend, works as a waitress on the casino floor. Hearing that he would be in town, she insisted he come down while she's on shift. Don't worry, she had said, Just sit at a table and I'll find you. He does, and starts to gamble, clumsily he's not very accustomed to throwing around money. She finds him and brings him a drink and, wow.....he's pretty sure he hasn't seen her wearing something like THAT before. They don't outwardly display that they know each other, partly because of a dumb rule her boss imposes on the staff not to act overly familiar with any one guest, and partly because they have always had an odd, teasing relationship. Teasing AND flirting it seems. His eyes can't seem to stop lingering on her. Despite the distractions, his luck has taken a significant turn for the better. He bets erratically, but it keeps paying off, enough that it's drawn a bit of a crowd around the table, as well as the attention the casino's head of security, watching from behind the scenes. Out of nowhere, a hotel concierge comes out, congratulating him on his winnings and offering to upgrade him to a nicer suite, along with some serious urging to step away from the table. Almost as if they're keeping tabs on him, another concierge pays him a visit later in his room with a complimentary meal. Security finds it all the more curious to hear that the waitress who had repeatedly served him drinks downstairs was now up in his room for a casual visit. I see it as a suspicious, perhaps mob-run casino with their head of security looking to prove he was cheating and invite the two of them behind closed doors. When things turn sour at the hotel, things evolve into an all night chase around the perpetually awake Vegas strip. --------------------------------------------------------- What's Gotten Into You Lately? - Husband x Wife.....sorta In a white suburban house, newly rebuilt in a neighborhood full of white suburban houses, an attractive couple moves in. Steve is traditionally handsome, tall with nice hair, good teeth, and a pleasant smile. He works in an office and wears pastel polo shirts and khakis on the weekends. Sally, his young, pretty wife, has smooth blonde hair, a fit body and soft features. She tends to their house and sells make-up kits throughout the neighborhood. The two of them are nice, friendly, content with their lives, and BORING-AS-SHIT. Their new house once looked drastically different, a sore spot in the neighborhood - the type that local kids would skip over on Halloween. It's previous owners, Sid and Joanie, were a far cry from the rest of the community. They exhibited punk styles, owned a muscle car, never tended to their yard... The argued viciously, often violently. Yet nearly without fail, just as the husband and wife latched fingers around eachother's throats, things would turn into rough, hot sex. A few years prior, just as they were working through this persistent cycle, neither of them noticed the gas leak. One lit cigarette later, they and most of their house was wiped from existence, physically anyway. Steve and Sally, living in their perfect, generic house, have no idea that the ghosts of Sid and Joanie are still there, stuck as spirits and stranded within their new abode. After a month of watching their boring new housemates, the ghastly couple realizes they can possess them, and for short periods of time, leave the house within a physical body. You end up with Sid and Joanie rekindling their physical needs and introducing Steve and Sally to things they never imagined. Things can develop between Sid and Joanie, Sid and Sally, Steve and Joanie, Sid taking Steve's body for a spin at work, Joanie taking Sally's around the neighborhood, etc, etc. --------------------------------------------------------- That's it for now. I look forward to any feedback or ideas from others, assuming that happens! Thanks for reading, - Crescent