Whitzz/544K-RP-Datasets huggingface dataset:
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

WOW! I'm so thrilled with the reception of this thread topic! Great stories with such valid points. I'm glad people can relate to this. I was somewhat convinced I was one of the only people on BlueMoon who was simple, for lack of better explanation, consumed with many projects and not only roleplays. Indeed, I would love to respond to my partner consistently, however that's just not possible at this time. Sometimes I reply daily, sometimes not for another two weeks. I know, I'm UNRELIABLE! - Hehe. boyo111 said Considering I am one of your partners I feel I can chime in here. Click to expand... And the most wonderful and patient of roleplay partners! angel
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

My RPs are always heavily story based so losing interest... that usually never happens to me. Click to expand... Oh, I usually don't lost interest either because my RPs are also story heavy. However, there are few times when the long, unexplained, pause kills it for me, or when my partner's writing quality deteriorates to the point where I don't like the RP anymore. Or, because of poor communication, the story is steered somewhere I'm not comfortable with.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

Forbidden Fruit said My RPs are always heavily story based so losing interest... that usually never happens to me. Click to expand... Oh, I usually don't lost interest either because my RPs are also story heavy. However, there are few times when the long, unexplained, pause kills it for me, or when my partner's writing quality deteriorates to the point where I don't like the RP anymore. Or, because of poor communication, the story is steered somewhere I'm not comfortable with. Click to expand... I get that. Whenever it's been a long amount of time, or when I return from a hiatus, I always provide the option of terminating the RP. Because I understand how long periods of time can deter a roleplay partner, and their excitement about said idea.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

I think this pretty much sums it up. AndNich123 said Im unreliable because Im human. Click to expand... Nice topic Tempationist...and if not for you I never would have gotten into doing TV show RP's, no interest previously but you caught me with Rollo since I was a Vikings fan. So Thank You.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

Life Happens. I like to think I'm reliable, and always also keep my partners informed of what's going on, and they tend to do the same. I've currently have five stories on hiatus, or where there hasn't been a post for over a month, all due to different life reasons, but my collaborators have been courteous enough to let me know where they, and the story, are at - I think, one of the benefits of not writing with anyone I don't feel a camaraderie with OoC. I also just recently picked up a scene after my partner had been absent from the site for seven months. I love each of my roleplays, and my partners platonically, of course!, and am happy to wait as long as it takes. The main issue I've run across regarding my own reliability is that I have a slower posting rate and, in turn, request my partners not reply too quickly. Due to my thought process, and sometimes strange way my brain works, it takes me a long time to transform the thoughts in my head into words on a screen, in a comprehensible way, and I need a break between each reply. Otherwise it becomes like I just exhausted all my of mental energy finalising that response, and now I have to immediately turn around and do it all again, and that takes a way a lot of the enjoymentrelaxation aspect for me. I do try to make it clear when plotting, however, some have difficulty understanding the importance to me of needing slower responses, which could come from my own difficulty of precisely expressing the reasons, or simply have the capability, or preference from their end, to post at a faster rate, and I've had to drop a couple because replies came too quickly, and found, after discussion, that it wasn't likely to change. As stated by others, it is a partnership, and communications is the key, so you need to find what works between the two of you.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

I am also somewhat unreliable. Sometimes my mood changes. It happens from time to time. Ya end up really excited about a story just to have it fizzle out rather quickly. I try to keep things going. But sometimes it doesn't work out. I am of a different mindset than some of you people though. I constantly see people say that no one owes anyone an explanation. Or a response. I disagree completely its called respect. If you agree to write with someone then if you decide not to write anymore then as a decent human being you owe an explanation for quitting. Sure it's the internet so we are more detached than those in real life. Just like in real life of someone agrees to go to the bar with me, then decide against it I expect a heads up. Just like in real life. If a friend thinks I don't deserve a heads up Then they aren't the type of person that I want to associate with. Does that mean I've never dropped out of a rp or whatever with no notice? I sure have. Shit happens sometimes. And it is really easy to loose messages in the thousands that accumulate in your box. But still. I do what I can.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

kaigen said Then ya have the other side of the coin. No fuck you I'm probably gonna vanish on you because you're just a random person on the internet, means you're an asshole. Are constantly in the online list at the bottom of the page but after being prompted you get pissed and say you haven't been around to write? You're not only an asshole but a liar. Click to expand... No, I got it and I disagree. On both counts and in fact that is what this thread is about. Perspective. If I vanish on you because I have stuff I want to do instead and yeah you're just an internet person, doesn't make me an asshole. It means my priorities are different than yours. Sometimes shit happens that isn't planned. Sometimes I am too fucking tired. Am I an asshole because I just don't have those ten seconds to spend on you? A random person on the internet that I share a fun hobby with? That is really insecure and limited thinking. To condemn a person because you aren't at the absolute top of their list every time, that you don't get to be in control or know with absolute certainty what is going on. And the second scenario you painted? Sometimes several times during the day I log on to BMR. I have a second on break or a few minutes while the car warms up before I have to leave in the morning, or a minute while I'm making myself and my family dinner to just log on and glance through the forum and even read a topic or two. Hell, I might even post a thought or two because it doesn't take as much energy as a story post. To call me a liar just because you've been stalking the online list is not only insane it's cruel. The thread is about perspective. You won't give anyone else the same leeway you would give yourself... You can make all these excuses and justifications for why it's okay for you to skip or miss out or just not feel good sometimes but you can't think of one good reason someone else might put you in the same position? Nobody says to themselves, You know what, I have an rp with kaigen but I don't feel like posting today or anytime this week. I'm going to leave him wondering where I went... FOREVER!!! MWAHAHAHA! He'll be so cheesed! They're most likely thinking, I am so beat this week. All I can do is scan the forum whenever I do get a chance to come on. Kaigen is such a cool and easy going guy. I wish I could message him but I just don't feel up to it. He'll understand. That's not an asshole that's human. They're not attacking you or wishing you ill. They're not deliberately trying to disrespect you or wound your ego. They just don't feel like doing it. And rp is the safe responsibility to skip out on.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

I hope that you can understand where I am coming from kaigen and what I am trying to say. I understand that it is respectful to offer explanations, but this is a privilege I am giving to you and anybody else who partners with me, not a right. I take issue mostly with these harsh judgements you cast then paired with you cleaning the slate for yourself simply because you do it the right way, or how you feel is right, when in all actuality the things you assume about missing people is harmful and hurtful. Nobody likes to be abandoned but in this realm, particularly with rp forums, I guarantee you will not find anybody who is secretly going around trying to screw with people and be a jerk on purpose. Everybody feels guilty for leaving someone hanging, even a little bit. Everybody is making their own justifications for why I don't have to do this thing right now. Let's put it this way, I'm not going to hold myself beholden to you because you don't trust me. That's not a partnership, that's a cage.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

Rudolph Quin said I hope that you can understand where I am coming from kaigen and what I am trying to say. I understand that it is respectful to offer explanations, but this is a privilege I am giving to you and anybody else who partners with me, not a right. I take issue mostly with these harsh judgements you cast then paired with you cleaning the slate for yourself simply because you do it the right way, or how you feel is right, when in all actuality the things you assume about missing people is harmful and hurtful. Nobody likes to be abandoned but in this realm, particularly with rp forums, I guarantee you will not find anybody who is secretly going around trying to screw with people and be a jerk on purpose. Everybody feels guilty for leaving someone hanging, even a little bit. Everybody is making their own justifications for why I don't have to do this thing right now. Let's put it this way, I'm not going to hold myself beholden to you because you don't trust me. That's not a partnership, that's a cage. Click to expand... To each their own. And I didn't say it's a right. Its not something that you're required to do for people. It is however something I require of my partners. If they choose not to do so, then so be it. If they choose not to and then come back however long later when they see something else they like in a request thread they will get exactly what I was given when they vanished then came back. Silence. You see it as a cage when someone expects common courtesy I see it as responsibility. Sharing in a story with someone is a privilege. One that is supposed to be fun. But one that comes with responsibility. Yeah, everyone will fail in their responsibilities at some point or another. It's how they move from there that helps to define them. Come back and say hey I'm sorry I vanished. Cool. Say fuck it and fuck them? Then there's an ass. Maybe I'm judging. Don't know cause I've never written with you. But what you describe is not a partnership. A partnership is something that is built on mutual respect and trust. Trust is earned. Wanting to be free of consequence does not a partnership make. Does that make sense? Do I think that there are people running around here trying to piss folks off by intentionally vanishing on folks just to piss them off? No. But there sure as shit are a lot of folk that have no clue how to be decent toward others.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

I happen to agree with Rudolph Quin, here. No partner owes you an explanation. They really don't. Although I do see where you're coming from, kaigen, on how it's decent common courtesy, the point I simply can't wash away is this If the reason a person has gone MIA, it's usually out of a serious, or deeply personal reason. That personal issue is NOT owed to you. I don't care what concept of human decency you envision in your mind. If someone goes MIA, you don't know the reason that's the reality. You don't know if they got sick, if someone in their family got sick, if someone died, if their whole world got turned upside down. Here's how I see it. Although RPing and writing is indeed a partnership, it is NOT a relationship, and for many people, it is not even a friendship. It is a platonic agreement between two online writers that they are interested in a common idea. That's it. What happens in the real world, even if it does effect their online presence, is none of your business, whatsoever. That's how I see it, anyways. EDIT I will just add, that no offence should be taken when a partner vanishes, unless there is some form of bond, relationship, friendship, whatever that had formed through OOC conversations and etc. A partner going MIA is RARELY personal. It is rarely an attack on an individual. Quite frankly, even if it does have to do with the other partner, like for example, their writing is very poor and not to the other person's standards. They still do not owe you an explanation. In fact, it's probably better they don't give you an explanation, because then it can really become personal, and seem like an attack even though there's a difference between brutal honesty and direct insult.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

Temptationist said I happen to agree with Rudolph Quin, here. No partner owes you an explanation. They really don't. Although I do see where you're coming from, kaigen, on how it's decent common courtesy, the point I simply can't wash away is this If the reason a person has gone MIA, it's usually out of a serious, or deeply personal reason. That personal issue is NOT owed to you. I don't care what concept of human decency you envision in your mind. If someone goes MIA, you don't know the reason that's the reality. You don't know if they got sick, if someone in their family got sick, if someone died, if their whole world got turned upside down. Here's how I see it. Although RPing and writing is indeed a partnership, it is NOT a relationship, and for many people, it is not even a friendship. It is a platonic agreement between two online writers that they are interested in a common idea. That's it. What happens in the real world, even if it does effect their online presence, is none of your business, whatsoever. That's how I see it, anyways. EDIT I will just add, that no offence should be taken when a partner vanishes, unless there is some form of bond, relationship, friendship, whatever that had formed through OOC conversations and etc. A partner going MIA is RARELY personal. It is rarely an attack on an individual. Quite frankly, even if it does have to do with the other partner, like for example, their writing is very poor and not to the other person's standards. They still do not owe you an explanation. In fact, it's probably better they don't give you an explanation, because then it can really become personal, and seem like an attack even though there's a difference between brutal honesty and direct insult. Click to expand... I think that both of you are missing a key point I've been making.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

I think the main thing is that not everyone's priorities are the same and not everyone communicates in the same fashion. But what needs to be kept in mind and what I'm seeing as a common pattern is that no one should take anything personally. If your partner doesn't reply right away, don't take it as an insult. If their muse suddenly takes off on an RP that isn't yours, don't take it as an insult. More often than not the explanation is simple and your co-writer won't mind offering it up at the appropriate time. And, more often than not, said silence is short lived and passes. You just have to be patient and let it pass. We all go through our cycles after all. Anyway, when it comes to who feels a need to give a heads up and when...that might depend on the nature of the relationship formed between you and your co-writer. Some are easy to figure out because you click well and talking is easy and conversation flows about anything. With others it can be harder to tell. I, for one, can have a hard time telling sometimes. I've a hard time reading people in general. So when people give certain signalscues, I interpret them accordingly. Right or wrong. And I tend to be rather literal. But that aside, there are people who give very little when you try to talk to them. Either they don't converse much or the level of conversation is what I term 'fluff and nonsense'. That is, they won't really talk outside the scope of the story you're writing together. And that's ok. But I will never consider those people friends. Acquaintances, maybe. shrugs But I digress some. Point is, if you find out that the way a person posts andor communicates doesn't mesh with how you operate...don't take it personally. It doesn't mean the other is a bad person, malicious, evil, what have you. They just don't function like you. Therefore, it's best to not write with them. Sure, you can interact. But writing and doing things of that nature? It's probably best avoided.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

I have read, with interest, the contents of this thread. I would, at this time, like to add my cent and a half on this topic. I thought a couple of times of not saying anything, but, it's hard to take a blind eye to some things. I am 61 years old, and been in the US Air Force for 20 years. I have been around a lot of people, been to a lot of places. My father just passed away at the age of 99, two months short of his 100th birthday, and himself was a construction worker and coal miner. He taught me the value of hard work, decency, dignity, honor and respect, which I try to carry on now, and I believed in when I was in the military. In short, no matter how we try to rationalize things about role playing partnerships, it is just that, a quasi relationship between two individuals. You can't take the human element out of things, in this forum, or in life for that matter. I have always tried, in and out of this forum to treat people like I hope they treat me. It doesn't matter how high you raise your shields, or come off how tough you are, rejection hurts. Especially, when someone tosses you away like a piece of paper into a garbage can. Especially when you're treated as if you're a statistic, or a notch on someone's pen. It's ironic that we're practicing a form of communication, yet we don't seem to know how to communicate with a partner. I have no problem if someone does not want to role play with me, for whatever reason, or real life reals its ugly head and causes disruption of things. If not just for common courtesy, it's nice to know what is going on. Maybe just tossing away a roleplay partner is the accepted thing to do, I'll call it the 'BMR two step' but for me I don't dance that way. If someone partners with me in a role play, I will always, to the very best of my ability, treat that person as I hope they will treat me. With decency, dignity, honor, and respect. I may not have a lot of partners, as some of you do, but those I am rich for those I have. Anyway, that is my cent and a half...now you can tear up and destroy what I say to rationalize that your agenda is right. At least thank you for allowing me to share my idea, which is what a forum should be about.
Thread: Why RP partners are so UNRELIABLE (a friendly rant about myself)

I haven't really seen anyone attacking anyone. But those who've been most vocal are also people I converse with quite regularly. XD So maybe that has something to do with it. And by that, I don't mean about this topic. I mean that I get how they speak, the manner in which they have a conversation and discuss stuff with you. XD So anyway, my way is to try my best to communicate just because that's how I roll. Does it always flow easily? Nope. Sometimes stuff comes up unexpectedly. Or sometimes I'm hit by sudden overwhelming stressors. Sometimes I just can't read how in the fuck I should be communicating with my co-writer yeah, this happens, lol. But whatever the case, I say what I mean and it sucks when the trust is severed. I will say that things always flow best for me when there's a nice balance of things. Meaning we write well together and get along ooc. With the ooc I tend to get bored if the chatter constantly revolves around fluffy nonsense. It's not the worst thing in the world, but chances of story survival diminish and I certainly won't view you as more that a fleeting acquaintance. Just a fact. And if you aren't willing to take the time to connect with me as a person on some level it's just harder for me to stay interested for very long or feel a need to drop notes all that often. That isn't said to be cruel, just I'm more inclined to feel more comfortable talking to those I know give a TRUE damn than those who just want a post out of me. . That said, one of my co-writers who's posted in this thread is kaigen. And while he's voiced some things differing from Quin a dear friend of mine and Tempt, I will say that he's taken that time to connect with me. Whether intentional or not. So it makes the writing enjoyable and the ooc easy. It makes me want to give those heads up even on those days when I might not feel like it because that respect is there much like my friend Quin has it. Not sure if that makes any sense or not. I do tend to ramble. Lol. XD But I guess my point is that the way people treat you can really matter. The way they talk to you, etc. At least it does for me.