BREAKING: Deadly shooting at medical campus

Officials initially said at least one person was dead, according to KTVN.

Police said the gunman wounded four people and committed suicide, the Associated Press reported. The news organization later reported that a victim died in the shooting, according to police.

This is a developing story. Please check back for updates.

RENO, Nev. (AP) -- A suicidal gunman opened fire at a Reno hospital campus Tuesday, killing one person, wounding two others and sending police on a door-to-door search within the facility amid the chaos.

The Nevada Department of Public Safety said the wounded victims were in surgery and one of them is a doctor. The gunman killed himself after the shooting.

Reno Deputy Police Chief Tom Robinson didn't say how many shots were fired or what type of weapon was used, and didn't release the identities of the male shooter or the dead and injured. He said, however, that investigators were confident no one else was involved.

"They are in the middle of a crime scene," Robinson said of the two bodies still on the third floor of a four-story medical building. "We're in the middle of an investigation and we don't want to compromise that by rushing up to identify them."

Department of Public Safety spokeswoman Gail Powell said the wounded doctor is a woman but she had no more information about the shooting that happened at the Center for Advanced Medicine.

Robinson said there were about 100 people in the building when the shooting was reported at 2:05 p.m. Officers entered three to five minutes later and did "a systematic search, floor to floor, room to room," Robinson said.

"On the third floor of the building they located two people down and located two people injured and evacuated the injured parties," he said.

Renown Regional Medical Center was put on lockdown amid the chaos of the shooting as law enforcement rushed to the scene and victims were treated by doctors on the hospital campus. More than three dozen police cars, including SWAT team vehicles, surrounded the sprawling medical complex and closed off a three-block area near downtown Reno.

State Sen. Debbie Smith said she was at Renown for an appointment and was trying to leave a nearby building when the shooting occurred.

"I encountered some SWAT team guys, they said nobody was leaving," she said. "A police officer was at the door and said I couldn't go out there."

Renown Regional Medical Center posted a notice on its website less than two hours after the shooting saying that operations had returned to normal at the main hospital but police were still investigating the shooting. About two dozen witnesses were taken to police headquarters for interviews.

"The biggest piece right now is we are trying desperately to reach the next of kin," Robinson said.

At least one person was transported by ambulance from the building where the shooting happened to the Renown hospital's emergency room, less than a block away, said Scott Walquist, a spokesman for the Regional Emergency Medical Services Authority.

The Center for Advanced Medicine building is a modern structure connected by a second-floor walkway to the hospital and a parking structure.

Police initially said the gunman shot four people before killing himself, but they later said he wounded two people and killed another before committing suicide.

Gov. Brian Sandoval said on Twitter that he and his staff were monitoring the situation and his thoughts and prayers were with those affected by the tragedy.

Renown Regional Medical Center is the largest hospital in northern Nevada. It has played an important role in responding to several recent tragedies in northern Nevada, including a crash at a Reno air race in 2011 that killed 11 people and a rampage at a Carson City restaurant the same year that killed three uniformed Nevada National Guard members.

Renown Regional Medical Center Shooting Leaves Multiple People Wounded (UPDATES)

There are multiple reports of a shooting at the Renown Regional Medical Center in Reno, Nev.

Officials initially said at least one person was dead,

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By the time you show up to my office, your marriage may be over

Marriage therapy only works if both partners are committed to the process. But by the time some couples schedule an appointment, one or both partners has already checked out.

Below, marriage therapists around the country share seven reasons to head to therapy sooner than later.

"The average couple that comes in for therapy has been struggling for about six years. This means they’ve been unhappy for much longer than they needed to be. One reason to get into therapy early is to get ahead of the curve and address issues before they become problems." ― Zach Brittle, a therapist and founder of the online couples therapy series forBetter

"Couples who reach out earlier for support when things are amiss often head off a caustic, ugly pattern of hurting each other in ways that are hard to forget or forgive. Marriage therapists should be able to help partners identify the ways they express themselves when they are hurt or angry and to recognize how they may unintentionally put their partners on the defensive."― Linda Lipshutz, a psychotherapist in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida

"In my opinion, the ideal time for couple’s therapy is pre-engagement. Like, way pre-engagement ― pre-ring, pre-asking-for-blessings. When you both agree that marriage to one another is a solid possibility for your future, that’s when to schedule a handful of appointments of pre-engagement counseling. So many of the issues I see from long-married couples stem from fundamental problems that could have been caught long before the wedding: People who suddenly realize two years after marriage they have opposing views on whether or not to have children. Couples who have wildly different stances on spending and saving. Couples who suffer for years due to different attitudes toward sex that emerged long after their wedding. A few sessions with a therapist who can ask the hard questions could save you from years of misery or at least let you know what you’re signing up for." ― Ryan Howes, a psychologist in Pasadena, California

"When issues remain unresolved, resentment can create a large and ugly divide between two people. This often manifests as lack of empathy, disinterest and at times, even disrespect. Go to therapy before arguments seem insurmountable because one or both of you have become apathetic." ― Talia Wagner, a marriage and family therapist in Los Angeles, California

"I’d say roughly two-thirds of all relationship problems are perpetual. That means they’ll be around for the duration of the relationship and, for the most part, will be unsolvable. Couples waste a lot of time trying to solve unsolvable problems. Therapy can help you prioritize ‘repair,’ or staying connected over ‘resolution,’ which is often out of reach." ― Zach Brittle

"I often share a folksy old saying with my clients: ‘It’s best to fix the roof when the sun’s shining.’ We all know that when we’re in the midst of crisis we make hasty, impulsive decisions that strive for immediate safety instead of long-term sustainability. Maybe you’ve noticed the relationship is strained every time a partner has a job change and you see a new career shift on the horizon. The wise choice may be to go to counseling now, when things are still calm, to learn tools to cope with the changes. It’s OK to go to counseling when things seem ‘fine’ so that you are more resilient when they aren’t. Even the strongest marriages will encounter tough times eventually, and it’s good to be equipped when they come." ― Ryan Howes

"Finding yourself regularly feeling disappointed and flat about your relationship is no small thing. Getting help early is more likely to be beneficial than waiting because you’re probably both still open to change and not yet so resentful or tired, to stop wanting to try. Sadly, one of the most common mistakes couples make is to shut their eyes and keep falling deeper into resentment and avoidance of growing distance, hoping things will just magically fix themselves. Most of the time, they don’t. Don’t waste time ― life is too short." ― Debra Campbell, a psychologist and couple’s therapist in Melbourne, Australia and the author of Lovelands

By The Time You Show Up To My Office, Your Marriage May Be Over

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Children Inherit Intelligence From THIS Parent!

Most of us generally assume that intelligence is inherited from both parents. But that’s not quite the case. There’s only one parent who gets the credit and that is – drum roll please – mom!

Through extensive study , we now know that intelligence is passed on through ‘conditioned genes.’ These particular conditioned genes live in chromosome X – which women contain two of.

But wait – what exactly are conditioned genes and why do they matter? The answer, coming right up!

Conditioned genes behave differently depending on which parent they come from.

German researchers pioneered this concept back in 1984 . Robert Lehrke continued to study it in more recent years. He found that genes from dad go to the limbic system, while mom’s head straight for the cerebral cortex.

Both are areas in the brain but they do very different things. The limbic system deals with emotion, instinct and mood. The cerebral cortex handles intelligence.

In other words, when mother passes on genes associated with high intelligence, they’ll wind up right where they need to be. If dad passes on those same genes – remember, men have one X chromosome – they’ll never make it to the area that needs them.

Because of these findings, psychologists now say the best predictor of a child’s intelligence is their mother’s IQ.

Just take a moment to appreciate how ironic this discovery is. For much of human history, we’ve ascribed intelligence to men, while attributing emotions to women. These findings prove that the exact opposite is true, as far as genetic development goes.

Moms, while this definitely gives you some bragging rights, don’t get too excited. Psychologists estimate genes account for just 40% to 60% of intelligence. The rest depends on environment and parenting styles – which both parents are a part of.

Consider your initial contribution more of a running start than a golden ticket.

Interestingly enough, dads, research shows that after your child is born, you have a much greater impact on their intelligence. Children who spend more time with their fathers wind up with higher IQ levels.


It’s pretty safe to assume that 2016 wasn’t exactly anyone’s finest hour. It was a tough year full of political disappointments, celebrity dramas, and devastating deaths. 2017 is a new chapter, though, and there’s plenty of time for us to rewrite the story. As the whole world makes their own New Year’s resolutions during the holiday season, you might notice that almost all of them are outwardly focused. People want to lose weight, go to the gym more, or start a new kind of diet. What if you made the choice to love your body more than ever in the upcoming year, though? Without trying to change what you look like?

HelloGiggles spoke with Annie Robinson, M.S., wellness coach and co-founder of Pause Breathe and Connect, who says it’s much healthier to put aside the promises that are meant to transform our physique, and instead focus on making ourselves feel more alive and healthy. In other words, let’s learn how to embrace and appreciate our body, rather than judge it. "Central to overcoming distorted perceptions of your body and self is to cultivate self-compassion and self-confidence," Robinson says. Gaining self-esteem doesn’t come from losing weight or eating less cake. It all starts by feeling more comfortable with the exact person you looked at in the mirror this morning.

Here are seven little ways you can love your body more in 2017.

You have all the reasons in the world to love who you are and be grateful for the body you’ve got here and now. Nobody can fulfill the job of being your biggest fan like you can. Let 2017 be the year when you form a daily habit that’s easy to maintain, yet packs a big punch of positivity — give yourself a daily affirmation.

Pick an affirmation or a quote that inspires you and makes you feel comfortable in your own skin.. "Perhaps write it on a card and hang it on your fridge, or place it next to your bed," Robinson recommends. Every time you pass by this nugget of encouragement, you’ll feel a rush of optimism that will carry you through tough parts of your day. If this sounds too cheesy for you from the bat, don’t worry. That’s normal. But give it a shot anyway. You might be surprised at how good it feels to say nice things to yourself.

When the New Year comes knocking on our doors, we’re bombarded with dieting methods that will help us lose weight, because apparently we overate during the holidays (hogwash, in our opinion). Losing weight is the number one New Year’s resolution in America, so a there will likely be a lot of people around you who will become focused on shedding pounds.

Robinson tells HelloGiggles that shifting the focus from your diet to how you feel internally will serve you so much better in the upcoming year. "It’s not actually about what you eat or how often you go to the gym—it’s about your relationship with yourself," she says. So instead of worrying about eating less bread or less chocolate, just focus on how you can have some fun and feel more fulfilled.

Every body is different, but we’re rarely shown any diversity on the cover of magazines and on TV. The women we see are overwhelmingly thin, tall, white, and big-breasted. If you don’t have the same figure (let’s face it, most of us don’t), looking constantly at all these women’s posts on social media will likely cause our self-esteem to plummet.

One small change you can make in your social media life is to switch up which profiles you spend the most time looking at. Choose to follow the people who look more like you and you feel better represent you. You’ll be less inclined to judge or compare yourself to others.

The benefits of exercising reach far and wide, and it does so much more for your body than just helping you stay toned and fit. Working out sharpens your memory, helps you sleep better at night, and, best of all, improve your moods and boost your self-confidence. If you’re not a gym kinda gal, don’t go lift weights. If you’re not a yoga kinda gal, don’t go to all those vinyasa flow classes your friends love. Find something you enjoy, so it’s not a chore to get your heart rate up. Rather, it’s something you love doing that feels like an escape from every day life.

Robinson also urges us to move away from the "get fitter" push that often gets passed around during this time of year. It implies that "you are falling short right now," she says. Instead of convincing yourself that your fitness level isn’t good enough, just find a way to move your body that brings you joy.

It’s like that scene in Mean Girls when the four Plastics stand in front of the mirror and criticize themselves: "I’ve got man shoulders;" "My nail beds suck;" "My hairline is so weird." We’ve all done it before with our friends, and we’ve all got parts of our body that we’re insecure about. Let 2017 be the year that we stop putting ourselves down, though, and get rid of the negative dialogue in our heads. The kinder we are to ourselves, the happier our body will be.

Because of the overload of diet-based New Year’s resolutions, Robinson says it’s easy for people to "engage in disordered behaviors with food." We get obsessed with following a specific diet, and then we punish ourselves for eating too much chocolate or failing to eat enough vegetables. All that wasted energy could be better spent actually enjoying our food, rather than using it as a tool to alter our bodies.

"Social media is a mixed bag," Robinson tells HelloGiggles. "On the one hand, it can be triggering and brew competition and comparison. On the other, it can create really empowering and supportive communities that uplift and encourage people to progress on their healing journey." Moving in the New Year, it’s important to recognize who you surround yourself with online, and whether they’re lifting you up or dragging you down.

Do a Facebook and Instagram cleanse before the start of January, and get rid of all the people whose values you don’t align with. What we fill our heads with has an immense impact on how we feel about ourselves. Also, consider how much time you spend on social media. Maybe it’s time to reevaluate how quickly you pick up your phone in the morning, or how late into the night you’re scrolling through people’s newsfeed. Your time is precious. Make sure you’re spending it in a way that makes you feel happy, happy, happy.

The post 7 little ways you can love your body more in 2017 appeared first on HelloGiggles.

It’s pretty safe to assume that 2016 wasn’t exactly anyone’s finest hour. It was a tough year full of political disappointments, celebrity dramas,...


If you rub epsom salt into your hair, the unexpected effect will surprise you

Epsom salt isn't actually the table salt we all know. The mineral mixture, named for a saline spring in England, is actually a combination of magnesium and sulfate. This popular mineral is touted for its health benefits as well as uses in cleaning and gardening projects, according to SaltWorks

You can use Epsom salt in dozens of ways for health, beauty and cleaning projects. Check out just a few of the beauty and health hacks below you can do with this mineral, according to DIY & Crafts.

1. Clean your hair: If your hair is particularly greasy, you can pull excess oils right out by adding a bit of Epsom salt to your shampoo. Wash and rinse as usual..

2. Foot scrub: Winter weather can leave toes and feet dry, cracked and gross. Get rid of dry skin by combining a cup of Epsom salt with olive oil, castile soap and some essential oils and scrubbing your feet once or twice a week.

3. Bye bye frizz, hello volume: Mix equal parts hair conditioner and Epsom salt together. Heat the mixture in a pan. Then starting at the roots and working your way down, massage the mixture into your hair. Let set for 20 minutes and rinse. This works great for getting rid of frizz and adding volume to your hair.

4. Wash your face: Mix Epsom salt with liquid soap or face cream. Rub gently into your skin and rinse. You'll get a moisture boost and remove dead skin cells.

5. Deflake the lips: Mix a bit of Epsom salt with petroleum jelly and massage it into your lips to remove dead skin cells.

6. Ease a headache: If you have an aching head after a rough day at the office (or with the kids), try soaking in an Epsom salt bath. The salt-soaked bath can help relieve tension in your muscles and ease your headache.

7. Nix tummy troubles: Help ease constipation symptoms by drinking a teaspoon of Epsom salt in a glass of water. The magnesium should help get things flowing again.

8. Have a better morning after: If you had a little too much red wine last night, you can ease hangover symptoms. Sip a teaspoon in a bit of water to help flush out your system. Make sure to drink tons of water to stay hydrated, though!

9. Fade a bruise: Skip the raw meat compress and grab the Epsom salt instead. Mix two tablespoons of Epsom salt with a little water and apply it to the bruised area.

10. Get more shut-eye: Soak in an Epsom salt bath for about 20 minutes before dozing off to help you relax and loosen up for a better night's sleep.

11. Ease muscle pain: Enjoy an Epsom salt bath after a hard day at the gym or working in the yard to alleviate muscle soreness and speed recovery.

12. Remove a splinter: Apply salt to the skin over the splinter to help pull it to the surface. Bid a fond farewell to the painful tweezer method!

Wellness Mama and SaltWorks offer a few suggestions for using Epsom salt around the house and garden:

13. Plant fertilizer: Add one tablespoon of salt to tomato plant soil to encourage bigger plant growth.

14. Clean the bathroom: Mix one part Epsom salt with one part liquid dish soap, and scrub grout and tile well.

15. Water your houseplants: Mix a few tablespoons of Epsom salt with water and feed your plants as usual.

16. Deter Slugs: Sprinkle a bit of Epsom salt onto the patio to keep slugs at bay on rainy days.

17. Boost your roses: Add a tablespoon of Epsom salt to your soil to promote healthier roses.

18. Clean the washer: Fill your washing machine with hot water. Add Epsom salt and run a regular cycle to get rid of buildup on the insides of the machine.

19. Protect your plants: Add Epson salt to your grass and plants to keep bugs at bay.

20. Green up your grass: Add two tablespoons of Epsom salt to a gallon of water and sprinkle it on your grass to keep it green. The magnesium prevents yellowing.

What are some of your favorite ways to use Epsom salt? Tell us in the comments below.. And pass along these helpful tips to your friends on Facebook.

20 ways to use Epsom salt around the house


At First, Her Tattoo Reads "I'm Fine." Now Watch What Happens When She Stands Up...

In a class I had with her, she opened up about her own struggles that she has faced with her own mental illness. Hearing her words made me realize that even though it can seem like you are the happiest, most intelligent, or down-to-earth human being, everyone has struggles. I sought her out not long after. She helped me find the right help that I needed.

Inspired by her college professor’s story, Miles made a pivotal decision in her life. She got a tattoo and wrote a Facebook status about her depression that has since gone viral on the platform.

Miles’s tattoo is actually an ambigram. It reads "I’m fine" from most angles, but if you look at from another angle, it can read "save me." The tattoo is a powerful symbol that represents the struggle of those who deal with depression.

Since posting the status on Facebook, Miles has gone on to become a major voice for those who suffer from mental illnesses. She says,

You’d be surprised by how many people YOU know that struggle with depression, anxiety, or other mental illness. I may only be one person, but one can save another...and that’s all I could really ask for.

At First, Her Tattoo Reads "I’m Fine." Now Watch What Happens When She Stands Up...


FINALLY! SRK Opens Up On Not Releasing His Film On The Same Day With Salman Khan!

Bollywood has witnessed too many competitions of actors but no competition has been as strong as that of The Khans. The Khans have ruled over Bollywood all these years and they will continue to rule as long as they are in the industry.

Salman Khan and Shahrukh Khan have been in the industry for quite some time now. When the duo came together in Karan Arjun, they totally set the screen on fire and left us looking forward to more such super hits to please their fans. But somewhere in between things went haywire and our Karan Arjun split. However, the after all the speculations made by the media, both Salman and SRK cleared their woes and said that the two have got back to being good friends.

We all have been aware of the two major releases of our two favourite Khans. The typical tradition that these have been following, of releasing their movies on particular occasions continued this time too. While ‘Sultan’ released on ‘Eid,’ the release of ‘Raees’ was postponed. When the 50-year-old was asked about the reason behind this delay, here’s what he had to say,

"We have two reasons (for not releasing Raees with Sultan). One is, me and Salman spoke about it that big films have their level release wise.. They should get released in at least 3500 to 4000 theatres at one time. We all have faced it at certain, point of time that two big films came together and did not get the desired theatrical release. This is quite a bog loss for the budget of the film. Till the time we have eight to nine thousand theatres for release of two big films, this cannot happen." He further added, "Second part was, we were still working on it and it was injured. I have still some portions to shoot for a day. But the film is ready. We thought of an alternate date in this year. But some other big film was coming then"

SRK mentioned that the probable release date could be January 25 or 26. However, even then his movie dates would clash with that of Hrithik’s, as ‘Kaabil’ is slated to release around that time.

When asked about that clash, he said, "We have discussed with Hrithik for ‘Kaabil’ because it has just started its shoot. So hopefully we will come out on 25th or 26th January now. We have time. A little bit of work is left. I have not given my last shot still now. I knew Hrithik’s film was coming but he had not started the film then. We talked to Hrithik and Riteish (Sidhwani), Farhan (Akhtar) are meeting him and Rakeshji (Roshan) on 11th or 12th this month. Then they will finalise on what’s to be done."

Well, looks like we’d never get to see the two releasing their movies together on one day. Moreover, it’d also be unfair to their fans, because even though they have their issues, there are fans who love SRK as much as Salman.


Moldova was the highest, consuming 17.4 litres of pure alcohol, per person, per year. According to Vouchercloud, that's 178 bottles of wine each (roughly two bottles per day).

Presumably, they're also the highest consumers of bacon, Berroca, and, duvets.

The UK ranked 17th in the world, on a meagre 12 litres per person, per year, just ahead of Finland and behind Croatia.

According to Vouchercloud, this is equal to 408 pints each per year, or a pint and a bit per day (more accurately zero for 5 days and then whenever a day gets the word "mad" put on the front of it 30 in one evening).

Abstinent countries (or at least officially abstinent) recorded the lowest consumption.

These were typically Islamic nations such as Pakistan, Kuwait, and the states of North Africa and South West Asia.

The US was put in 49th place, for consuming 9.2 litres per person per year.

Baltic states, South Eastern Europe, and the Caucuses dominated the top 10, but Australia represents the Anglosphere at 10th place.

These are the world's drunkest countries The list

The UK was beaten to first place by Moldova, Andorra, and Serbia. Curse you 'Dry January'! Vouchercloud merged its own survey results with data from the World Health Organisation, in order to find the most sozzled nations on Earth. Compiling results from 2010-2015, Vouchercloud created this map (below) for your delectation.


You Won’t Believe How Much Lack Of Physical Exercise Costs The Global Economy!

A study of one million people has found that physical inactivity costs the global economy $67.5 billion a year in healthcare and productivity losses, but an hour a day of exercise could eliminate most of that.

Sedentary lifestyles are linked to increased risks of heart disease, diabetes and cancer, researchers found, but activity - such as brisk walking - could counter the higher likelihood of early death linked with sitting for eight or more hours a day.

Representational image | Source: Reuters

Such inactivity is estimated to cause more than 5 million deaths a year - almost as many as smoking, which the World Health Organization (WHO) says kills 6 million a year.

Giving details of their findings at a briefing in London, the international team of researchers warned there has been too little progress in tackling a "pandemic of physical inactivity".

Ulf Ekelund, a professor at the Norwegian School of Sports Sciences and Cambridge University, said that WHO recommendations for at least 150 minutes of moderate exercise a week was probably not enough. A quarter of adults worldwide do not meet even the WHO's recommendations.

"You don't need to do sport or go to the gym ... but you do need to do at least one hour a day," he said, giving walking at 5.6 km an hour (km/h) or cycling at 16 km/h as examples of what was needed.

People who sat for eight hours a day but were otherwise active had a lower risk of premature death than people who spent fewer hours sitting but were also less active, suggesting that exercise is particularly important, no matter how many hours a day are spent sitting.

The greatest risk of premature death was for people who sat for long periods of time and did not exercise, according to the findings, published in The Lancet on Wednesday.

In another of the series of four studies, researchers estimated healthcare costs and productivity losses for five major diseases linked to lack of exercise - heart disease, stroke, diabetes, breast cancer and colon cancer - cost $67.5 billion globally in 2013.

Melody Ding of the University of Sydney, who led this part of the research, said the costs occur largely in wealthier countries, but as poorer countries develop, so too will the economic burden of chronic diseases linked to inactivity.

Researchers estimated healthcare costs and productivity losses for five major diseases linked to lack of exercise - heart disease, stroke, diabetes, breast cancer and colon cancer - cost $67.5 billion globally in 2013.

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https://pixel.quantserve.com/pixel/p-kHc8ja1mP4cMt.gif?labels=Author.Reuters.You Wont Believe How Much Lack Of Physical Exercise Costs The Global Economy,


The World's Simplest Breakfast You're Probably Too Scared to Try

To your typical eggs-and-bacon American, there’s not much about tamago gohan that makes sense. The Japanese breakfast is nothing more than a large raw egg cracked over a mound of steamed rice. If you feel like having an extra luxurious morning, you can splash the combination with soy sauce and/or speckle it with a shake or two of sesame seeds. Then, using chopsticks, you vigorously swirl the mixture into a froth and devour.

The first time I heard about tamago gohan was in college. I worked the lunch shift at a sushi bar, where I had the good fortune of joining the owner, Tencho, and my co-worker, a petite Japanese woman named Shoko, for breakfast. Each morning, Shoko would simmer a stockpot of miso soup, I’d wash and cook the rice, and Tencho would slice sashimi.

We’d then sit in the sunny corner of the restaurant, NHK news on the television, the spread before us. I’d hover above my bowl of miso soup and allow the steam to kiss my skin awake. I’d feel the warm rice quiet my grumbling gut. I’d inhale the sensuous slices of salmon, snapper, and yellowtail.

As a white kid who grew up in Eastern Pennsylvania, I had a healthy fear of salmonella. My grandmother used to pull her potato salad from the table the moment a sunbeam struck it. Tamago gohan made me a little nervous (and where was the obligatory pork product?). I'd watch my boss crack, stir, and inhale with the nonchalance associated with pouring a bowl of cereal. Did this man secretly possess an iron-lined stomach? It took Tencho several months of prodding, of him repeating, "You are not man," before I could accept a bowl of rice topped with a quivering, uncooked egg.

It quickly became one of my favorite comfort meals. Tamago gohan possesses the rib-sticking satisfaction of oatmeal, and the simplicity of sushi. The egg, when incorporated into the rice, relaxes each grain, and, with it, the rest of the morning. Pops of nuttiness, provided by the sesame seeds, punctuate every few bites. The salty spike of the soy sauce balances the grassy brashness of brewed green tea, which you hopefully also have close at hand.

As Shoko taught me, it’s rude to leave even a single grain of rice in the bowl. So I spend the last few moments of breakfast meticulously plucking the remaining morsels with the tips of my chopsticks. I cup the bowl with my hand to feel the warmth of the rice through the ceramic. The process is meditative and, ultimately, lends a sense of closure to the meal.

You probably think I’m overselling tamago gohan. But I still feel different as an eater after finishing a bowl of the stuff then, say, after a Monte Cristo. Even piled-high breakfast sandwiches can't compete with the satisfaction of finishing a simple bowl of egg and rice. And maybe Tencho’s refrain of "you are not man" was less a jab than it was a philosophy. Finishing a bowl of tamago gohan somehow makes you feel more complete.

It’s been nearly a decade since I last ate with Tencho and Shoko, but I still crave our breakfasts—and the bowls of tamago gohan that accompanied them. Occasionally, on a lazy Sunday, I’ll shuffle into the kitchen, rinse a cup or so of rice, steam it in a pot, gently crack an egg over the mixture, and then sit down to reminisce.

1, with leftover rice Cook Time: 20 minutes

1 piece dried kombu, about the size of a playing card (optional)

To your typical eggs-and-bacon American, there’s not much about tamago gohan that makes sense. The Japanese breakfast is nothing more than a large raw e...

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This is the date Apple will unveil new iPhones

This Is The Date Apple Will Unveil New iPhones

The new iPhone will reportedly be unveiled on September 9. Although Apple hasn't officially revealed the fall event for the phone, sources familiar with the matter told Buzzfeed's John Paczkowski that the event will take place during the week of September 7 (Paczkowski has been accurate on previous Apple events.)

Wednesday will most likely be the day the event takes place given Apple's history for holding such occasions.

The event is expected to reveal the features for the new iPhone, including a Force Touch display, a better camera, and a more powerful wireless chip, according to the publication.

But that's not all. New iPads and a new Apple TV could also be announced as well.

For more on Apple's potential plans, here's information on a possible 4-inch iPhone 6 , or at least hope for one in the future.

The date of the new iPhone's announcement is September 9.

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Scientists just solved the mystery of these weird South American mounds

Scientists have long puzzled over what created strange mound formations in the tropical wetlands of South America, and a new study appears to have found the answer.

The mounds, which are called surales, are found throughout the Orinoco Llanos wetlands of Columbia and Venezuela, and according to research led by archaeologist and palaeoethnobotanist José Iriarte, these spectacular formations are actually massive conglomerations of worm poop.

Surales vary in size, with the largest mounds measuring up to 5 metres in diameter and up to 2 metres tall. To figure out how these gigantic lumps came to be, Iriarte, a researcher from the University of Exeter in the UK, and his team analysed the physical and chemical makeup of the mounds' soil.

The team found that up to one half of the total soil mass of the mounds is composed of earthworm casts – the muddy soil byproduct ejected from worm guts. It's not surprising that worms leave their casts behind – after all, everybody has to go sometimes – but how do their poop piles become so... comically epic?

According to the researchers, the surales form when large earthworms feed in shallow, flooded soils within the wetlands. These big guys leave their larger deposits behind, creating mini poop 'towers' that start sticking above the surface of the water. Kind of like when Saruman's tower becomes flooded in by the Ents... except with worm poop instead of an evil wizard.

After enough time, this casts tower begins to form into a mound, and the largest surales are formed when a couple of smaller mounds situated close enough fuse together.

Despite the surales' somewhat humble beginnings, now that we know how they come to be, it helps solve a riddle that has long perplexed researchers. Previous hypotheses on their formation included termite activity and a form of land erosion, but the new findings finally discount those explanations.

"This exciting discovery allows us to map and understand how these massive landscapes were formed," said Iriarte. "The fact we know they were created by earthworms across the seasonally flooded savannahs of South America will certainly change how we think about human versus naturally-built landscapes in the region."

Scientists Just Solved the Mystery of These Weird South American Mounds: They're Worm Poop

mounds, poop, surales, form, worm,
the, wetlands, flooded, iriarte, soil, casts, &quot, researchers, josé, massive


Does Missing $2.3 Trillion Prove 9/11 Was An Inside Job?

In the carnage following the September 11 terror attacks, a number of conspiracy theories began to emerge online concerning a cover-up, with some even suggesting that the U.S. government might have been behind the attacks.

While many of these theories are easy to debunk as nonsense, there is one piece of evidence that conspiracy theorists believe hints at something more sinister – missing cash.

The Daily Star reports that the day before the horrific attacks, former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld admitted that the Pentagon managed to somehow lose an eye-watering $2.3 trillion (£1.72 trillion) from its budget.

While this would have been a massive news story at the time, it was completely forgotten about the next day as people around the world watched the atrocious attacks on the Twin Towers which claimed thousands of lives.

Conspiracy theorists argue that the U.S. government hijacked a plane and crashed it into the Pentagon to destroy all evidence of the missing budget, while also bolstering a campaign to increase the military budget.

Robert Crawford, a reporter on Now Daily, said:

Accounting offices in the Pentagon were blown up and accounting offices based in New York building in the World Trade Center were demolished.

125 people were killed in the Pentagon attack, many of whom were accountants.

Theorists believe that the missing trillions were spent on a ‘deep space programme’, the intent of which is unknown but sounds a combination of really cool and absolutely terrifying.

Unfortunately, a bit of digging reveals that the conspiracy theorists have gotten a bit carried away.

When Rumsfeld mentioned the missing trillions, he didn’t mean stolen. He meant lost as in they couldn’t find it in their paper trail – basically, they’d forgotten to keep the receipts.

Of course, ‘truthers’ choose to ignore this evidence and believe the missing money is proof of a secret black ops budget that funds top secret space expeditions.

In the carnage following the September 11 terror attacks a number of conspiracy theories began to emerge online concerning a cover-up.

9/11 missing, trillions, money, world, trade, centre, twin, towers, collapse, bomb, plane, Donald, Rumsfeld, George, bush, terrorist


In a disturbing discovery revealed this week, nearly 800 children were found in a mass grave near a former home for unwed mothers and their children.

The children are believed to have been buried in a septic tank on the grounds of the home in Tuam, Ireland, between 1925 and 1961, BBC News reports. Many appear to have perished from infectious diseases or malnutrition.

The gruesome discovery was made by two boys who stumbled across the unmarked grave when they were playing near the site of St. Mary's Mother and Baby Home, which has since been converted into a housing estate.

Now, officials in Ireland are scrambling to determine how to proceed. While leaders in the Catholic Church are meeting to discuss plans for a memorial for the 796 children, Ciaran Cannon, minister of state in Ireland's Department of Education, is calling for an inquiry into the mass grave.

"The evidence to date seems to suggest that something very horrific went on there," Cannon told the Irish Independent. "Let's try and determine exactly what happened here first of all. Surely, there are people alive who have a connection with the place. I do think an inquiry is required."

Meanwhile, local historian Catherine Corless has delved into the troubled history of "The Home," a workhouse that was turned into a home for mothers and their babies in 1925 by the Sisters of Bon Secours. When Corless sought out the death certificates for the children in the mass grave, she learned there were 796 deceased, ranging from infants to 9-year-olds.

"There and then I said this isn’t right. There’s nothing on the ground there to mark the grave, there's nothing to say it's a massive children's graveyard. It's laid abandoned like that since it was closed in 1961," Corless told IrishCentral.

She is leading a campaign to raise funds for a memorial that will list the names of all the children.

Nearly 800 Children Found In Mass Grave Near Former Home For Unwed Mothers In Ireland

tuam home mass grave,800 babies septic tank,800 infants mass grave,mass grave ireland,800 infants septic tank,mass septic tank grave,ireland,septic tank grave,800 babies ireland


Famed winemaker's racist tirade goes WAY beyond Paula Deen

On Aug. 22, sixth-generation Italian winemaker Fulvio Bressan sparked a firestorm when he posted inflammatory, racially charged remarks to Facebook about Cecile Kyenge, who became Italy's first-ever black government minister when she assumed the post of Integration Minister in April.

Though Kyenge, an outspoken advocate of looser immigration laws, has been a frequent target of racist public incidents in recent months, Bressan's note was particularly abusive..

An English translation of Bressan's note, courtesy of HuffPost Italy's Giulia Belardelli:

hey, dirty Black MONKEY, I DON'T PAY TAXES to lodge your GORILLA friends at a HOTEL. Please bring them to your place, where you can feel superior with your money ... Oops ... That money is not even yours: it's the money Italians give you ... You're a s***ty black gold-digger.

In response, some wine merchants and writers -- even those previously fans of Bressan and his acclaimed, 400-year-old vineyard -- have called for a boycott of his wine.

British restaurateur Jacob Kennedy went so far as to smash his stock of Bressan wine on the sidewalk in front of his London restaurant, Bocca di Lupo. Kennedy taped his protest and then posted the video on YouTube.

Yet the threat of economic ruin hasn't caused Bressan to hold back in his tirades. In the weeks since his attack on Kyenge, he's continued to post frequent screeds about minorities on his Facebook page. He writes, of course, in Italian; Belardelli summarized the gist of them:

He blames gypsies and immigrants for the Italians' economic troubles, but he seems to be mad at everyone (starting with politicians). He is particularly aggressive towards Kyenge: he shared a combined photo of Kyenge and some people burnt to death with the sentence, "Look, this is what you do to Christians on your continent." In other posts he calls her "monkey," and he often shares stories and articles about crimes committed by immigrants.

Looking beyond his own borders, Bressan also mentioned U.S. President Barack Obama in one of his vitriolic posts.

As of press time, bottles of Bressan wines were still available for sale on the websites of several different American merchants, mostly for upwards of $40 a bottle.

Fulvio Bressan, Italian Winemaker, Faces Boycott Over Racist Tirade

The normally placid world of Italian oenology is having a Paula Deen moment.

On Aug. 22, sixth-generation Italian winemaker Fulvio Bressan sparked

huffpost full plate,Fulvio Bressan racist,Fulvio Bressan Cecile Kyenge,italian wine,fulvio bressan facebook,paula deen,Fulvio Bressan,wine,fulvio bressan paula deen,racist italian winemaker


jQuery and its cousins are great, and by all means use them if it makes it easier to develop your application.

If you're developing a library on the other hand, please take a moment to consider if you actually need jQuery as a dependency. Maybe you can include a few lines of utility code, and forgo the requirement. If you're only targeting more modern browsers, you might not need anything more than what the browser ships with.

At the very least, make sure you know what jQuery is doing for you, and what it's not. Some developers believe that jQuery is protecting us from a great demon of browser incompatibility when, in truth, post-IE8, browsers are pretty easy to deal with on their own.

Examples of how to do common event, element, ajax and utility operations with plain javascript.


How much do flight attendants really make?

"Friendlier service doesn’t cost a thing."

That’s what one travel writer said, after complaining about an experience on board a flight recently. But as a flight attendant with years of experience, my first thought was: Yes. It does.

Whenever I speak to people about what I do for a living, most seem to assume the money is pretty good. I did, too, before I became a flight attendant.

Despite the reputation of the job, there’s nothing glamorous about life as a flight attendant, especially in the first few years. New flight attendants who work for major carriers start out making $18,000-$20,000 a year. Flight attendants at smaller airlines and regional carriers? They make even less.

The airlines won’t tell you that, though. Ask, and they’ll refer to some stat about the median annual wage: $40,000. Sounds so much nicer, doesn’t it? Something else they won’t tell you is how long it takes to make that kind of money working a regular schedule, or the kind of flying it takes to get there when you have less than 10 years with a carrier.

"I took this job to spend what little money I make on vacations I can't afford," joked a new hire, who works 120 hours a month, after she saw me tweeting about flight attendant pay.

"But flight attendants barely work," is what I hear all the time. Don’t let the hours fool you.

A hundred and twenty hours a month may sound reasonable for your typical job on the ground, but in the air, it's insane. Working "80 hours" a month — a more regular schedule for flight attendants — actually means working many, many hours more.

We’re only paid for time in the air. That flight attendant greeting you at the boarding door, helping you find a place for your bag, guitar, crutches, wedding gown, emotional support pig? They're not being paid.

The clock doesn’t officially start ticking until the door is closed and the plane backs away from the gate. That's why flight attendants hate delays maybe even more than passengers. At my airline, when a flight is cancelled, I lose the hours, meaning I don’t get paid. I have to look for another trip — pray I can find another trip — to make up for it.

Watch they'll wait to cancel our flight to Dallas when we get to the airport... so we can sit around with angry passengers and not get paid. — Heather Poole (@Heather_Poole) February 23, 2015

Time on the ground adds up, which is why the most senior flight attendants work the best trips, longhaul flights, to maximize their time in the air. It's also why the number of hours can be misleading. Not all 12 hour trips are created equal.

I have 19 years with my airline, and I’m based at one of the most junior bases in the system: New York. It’s where most of our new hires end up, even though it's too expensive to live here on our salary. That's why so many flight attendants — including me — commute to the city (even though I live in Los Angeles). If I were based in LA, where my airline's most senior flight attendants work, I’d spend more time on the ground than in the air.

My two-day, 11 hour roundtrip from New York to Los Angeles might only take me 13 hours to complete, whereas a new hire might have to work three days (and who knows how many hours) hopping from city to city to make the same amount of time. While I’m on duty seven hours, a junior flight attendant could be on duty 12 or 14 hours. We'll be paid the same. Factor in the layovers and the time away from home, and it looks more like minimum wage than $25 an hour.

JFK-LAS: On duty: 10 hours 52 minutes. Paid: 6 hours 17 minutes. Layover: 8 hours 32 minutes — Heather Poole (@Heather_Poole) February 23, 2015

"How do you do it?" I’ve been asked by more than one flight attendant hopeful.

Enter the "crashpad," where flight attendants literally crash between trips.

In my first crashpad, there were probably 30 or 40 of us living together in a five-bedroom house. That's a guess — I have no idea how many roommates I had because people were constantly in and out at all hours of the day and night.

Six of us lived in my room alone, with bunk beds lining the walls. I spent $100 a month to stay there. I couldn’t afford anything else.

"I made $10,000 my first year and lived in San Fran," Kim Keegan, a flight attendant with a major carrier, told me. "I lived in my car for months."

That's not even the worst of it. There are flight attendants who live in the operations center at the airport.

Something tells me that’s not the image the airlines want to portray when you see us walking through the terminal. But the reality is many of us are glamorous homeless people.

"The first year I made $40,000 was in 2001. I’d been flying 10 years," said Penni Reynolds, a flight attendant with a major carrier. "It took me until 2011 to make over $40,000 again, because of all the cutbacks [after 9/11]."

Like her, it took most of my colleagues 10 years working a regular schedule to make that kind of money. Seniority matters so much it makes attendants hesitant to switch airlines. Nobody wants to start all over again, from the bottom, working crappy trips.

"But my brother's cousin's aunt's friend makes $80,000!"

This is where somebody will call me out, and tell me about a friend of a friend who is rolling it in. Well, that aunt, or friend of a friend, or second cousin twice removed (if they exist), has probably been flying for 40 years or is senior enough to hold the good trips. Good for them! The rest of us aren’t so lucky. I’m not saying it's unheard of, but the people who are making that much have been flying for decades, or are barely ever home and rarely see the light of day. What kind of life is that?

"I've never made $40,000," said Beth Henry, a flight attendant with over 15 years experience with a major carrier. "By the time I made enough hourly to get that much, I had kids and [my] husband's schedule to work around."

Chicago - New York — Heather Poole (@Heather_Poole) February 21, 2015

Same for me. I choose to work less time so I can be home to watch my son grow up, and I’m lucky I have that choice — not all my colleagues do.

Future flight attendants probably won't be so lucky, not the way things are changing (and have changed).

"Quit if you don’t like it!" may be what you're thinking right about now. I hear it whenever I write about the challenges of being a flight attendant.

Don't get me wrong: I’m not complaining, I’m explaining how it works. I want future flight attendants to know what they’re getting into before they give it all up to live "the dream." I can’t tell you how many emails I get from mothers with young children who think I make a lot of money and barely work.

I don't do this job for the money. I do it because I love it.

And anyway, quit and what? Let somebody else sleep in their car? That doesn’t make things better.

When I first started flying, things were great. I was broke — oh was I broke — but there was pool time in Miami, rollerblading in Rio, window shopping in Rome ... croissants in Paris. And if you’re lucky enough to hold the good trips, it’s still a good job.

But for most flight attendants, all we see at the end of a long day is a Holiday Inn at an industrial park a mile away from the airport. We’re lucky if there’s enough time to eat, sleep and shower.

And you wonder why I'm not smiling. I'm not mean, just tired. And probably hungry. — Heather Poole (@Heather_Poole) February 23, 2015

I feel sorry for new flight attendants today. Most of them will never make what I’m making, and they’re working under a different pay scale, with new work rules. Their days are longer and their layovers are practically nonexistent.

Now add in flights that are fuller than ever, travelers acting crazy, and whatever contagious disease is going around, and — oh yeah — terrorism, and you have to wonder: Is it still worth it? I don’t know.

Airlines are advertising new planes, flat beds, more amenities — particularly for first and business class — to try and convince the public that they are committed to making the flying experience better. But if they really want to do that, they should consider better compensating the people who are interacting most with passengers.

In the mean time, I hope flight attendants can keep smiling.

Heather Poole is a flight attendant for a major U.S. carrier, and the author of the New York Times bestseller "Cruising Attitude: Tales of Crashpads, Crew Drama and Crazy Passengers at 35,000 Feet." You can follow her on Twitter at @Heather_Poole.

Flight attendants aren't mean. They're just tired. And hungry.

airlines, uncategorized, air-travel, lifestyle, travel-leisure, flight-attendants


Injured Marine Held Salute For 3 Hours. What The Bikers Do? I'm Floored.

United States Marine Corps Veteran Staff Sergeant Tim Chambers is known to the world as The Saluting Marine for standing at attention for hours in the middle of the street during Rolling Thunder. In the video below, filmed in 2013, he held the salute for 3-4 hours while standing on concrete, surrounded by the bikers who zipped passed and around him. Despite having a broken wrist, Sgt. Chambers stood strong to perform his powerful act honoring veterans everywhere.

Sgt. Chambers stands with his makeshift memorial — boots, a rifle, flack jacket and Kevlar — displayed proudly at his feet. Over the years, families of fallen soldiers have donated personal items to symbolize their body and spirit.

The courageous feat is never lost on those who take part in Rolling Thunder. Many veterans stop on their bikes to salute to Sgt. Chambers, and thank him in return for upholding such a revered tradition.

Every Year, A Lone Marine Holds Salute For Fallen Soldiers

Every Memorial Day weekend since 1988, Rolling Thunder/Ride for Freedom has been held in Washington, DC, to raise awareness of the Prisoners of War–Missing in Action of all wars. United States Marine Corps Veteran Staff Sergeant Tim Chambers is known to the world as The Saluting Marine for standing at attention for hours in the...


Report: US Military Could Save Billions of Dollars By Doing This One Thing

A new report from the Center for a New American Security suggests that the U.S. Navy—and indeed the other military services—could save tens of billions of dollars by adopting semi-autonomous unmanned combat aircraft. Money would be saved because the Pentagon would not need to buy as many planes, nor would unmanned systems have to fly as many flight hours for training purposes. Moreover, it would afford the Navy a way to extend the reach of its carrier air wing so that naval aviation could strike deep into the heart of heavily defended enemy territory.

"The cost savings are just tremendous," said Paul Scharre, one of the authors of the study and director of the 20YY Future of Warfare Initiative at the Center for a New American Security.

According to the study, the cost savings estimates top $100 billion. In fact, under the most optimistic scenario, the savings could range between $95 billion and $170 billion while a more moderate case it might mean savings of between $80 billion and $140 billion. Under the most modest case scenario, the savings range between $30 billion and $54 billion.

Scharre makes the argument that when a "pilot" or drone operator "flies" an unmanned aerial vehicle, the human is only really making macro-level decisions rather than directly flying the machine—particularly in more advanced drones. Basically, even if the pilots were to maintain their proficiency in simulators only, it would make little difference to that operator. As far as that operator were concerned, the input or data coming into the simulator would be identical whether the drone as simulated, flying over Southern California or flying over Iraq. "It may be indistinguishable to the operator," Scharre said. "They might not even know."

That means that the Pentagon could save huge sums of money because pilots would not need to fly to maintain currency or fly peacetime training missions. Only a few aircraft would be needed to retain the skills of maintenance crews for operations at home station. The rest of the aircraft could be deployed for operational usage.

"The report is really about cost," Scharre said. "The cost of the airframe is identical. If you’re building a combat aircraft it’s going to have certain requirements in terms of speed, range, low visibility, weapons and everything else—those drive the cost of the aircraft. The cockpit costs are negligible. All of the saving come out of the training hours and the hours to keep up pilot currency. But then that has follow-on effects on the number of aircraft you buy, and that’s where there are huge savings."

Right now, the Navy has 10 air wings for its fleet of 10 carriers, however only a few of those carriers are deployed at sea with an air wing onboard. The remainder of the air wings and carriers are either in training or maintenance. Even during a surge, the Navy might at best deploy six carriers and their air wings, Scharre said. With a fleet of unmanned combat aircraft, the Navy would only have to buy enough unmanned combat aircraft to fill six air wings and its maintenance pipeline—which would significantly reduce the number of jets that the service would need. "You’re not buying 10 air wings," Scharre said—but nonetheless, each deployed carrier would retain the same—if not greater—combat capability.

However, while Scharre said that he hopes the CNAS study will influence the Navy’s on-going F/A-XX or Next Generation Air Dominance analysis of alternatives (AOA), he said he recognizes the carrier air wing will never be fully unmanned. More realistically, the future carrier air wing will be a mix of manned and unmanned systems. And, indeed, Scharre said that it would be preferable to retain a combination of human and autonomous control. "I think there is a role for unmanned combat aircraft on the carrier deck from an operational standpoint," Scharre said. "But it’s unreasonable to think—and I don’t know that anyone is suggesting—that the Navy go to an all-unmanned carrier air wing."

The CNAS report is not about what the mission of a future Navy unmanned combat aircraft might be. It’s simply about the potential savings the service could achieve with increased numbers of unmanned aircraft. "We would like to see the Navy incorporate cost analysis into their AOA," Scharre said. "In particular as they evaluate manned, unmanned and optionally manned variants of an F/A-XX —that they think about cost."

Think semi-autonomous unmanned combat aircraft.

Security, , US Navy, navy, UAVs, drones, Technology, Aircraft Carrier, Military


Crytek Dev Explains Why E3 Demos Rarely Match the Final Game

With E3 2016 just around the corner, Crytek’s Rok Erjavec explains why some games receive demos at the expo that appear to be more polished than their retail release.

With E3 2016 nearly upon us, many gamers are excited to see exactly what the expo will have in store. With both recently announced games such as Battlefield 1 expected to offer more information than what we already know, and the obvious hope for some exciting games that have yet to be revealed, there is one concern that may rear its ugly head in a very pretty way – stunning E3 demos that do not match up to the finished product. One developer, however, has spoken out about exactly why these demos seem to offer up a much more polished experience than their final version.

Rok Erjavec, Crytek’s technical director, recently spoke about this issue with DSO Gaming. Although the interview primarily focuses on the technical side of things, particularly regarding DirectX 12, the Crytek technical director did touch on the controversy surrounding games being downgraded from their E3 demos and showcases. Although Erjavec does understand some of the problems with this strategy, the technical director feels that "in many cases, the criticism is misplaced."

Erjavec went on to explain that the nature of these demos often causes this change in perceived graphical quality. "Trade-show demos are often carefully crafted experiences where a highly-polished single area is shown during the demo," said the technical director. He continued to explain that many developers are given a task of completing a 15-minute part of the game, but with a timeframe of building it in three to six months, while the rest of the game’s content is built over 12 to 24 months.

What this comes down to, then, is not so much an attempt to deceive players, and more just the difficulty of creating a full gaming experience in a much more pressured timeframe. "In many cases there was no downgrade as such," explained Erjavec, "just the reality of producing much more content over what effectively amounts to (much) less time." However, the technical director did suggested that one kind of demo is hardly useful for the developer or for its audience, stating that "I do find gameplay showcases that aren’t running on actual hardware targets or are entirely pre-recorded a bit pointless, since games are fundamentally about interactive experiences."

Regardless of exactly how demos are misleading gamers, it’s doubtful that the most blatant perpetrators of superior demos will get a free ride from the gaming community. Games such as Aliens: Colonial Marines will live long in the memory of players, with a final version of the game so bad that it led to a long and painful lawsuit. Indeed, in spite of some stunning demo footage, it has taken until 2016 for users to make the game playable through modded content.

Although Erjavec’s comments provide a very useful context for those outside of the game development circuit, it is perhaps still important for those games with the largest discrepancies to be called out on it. After all, Ubisoft promised to change its release policies after the notoriety gained from Watch Dogs. That said, maybe with a bit more understanding of how games are made, perhaps gamers will be a little more lenient on games that only lack a little polish upon release.

With E3 2016 just around the corner, Crytek's Rok Erjavec explains why some games receive demos at the expo that appear to be more polished than their retail release.


Harry Potter Fans Are Seriously Losing It Over This Tattoo And I Can See Why

The design is so extraordinary because it uses UV ink, meaning that it reveals a secret message as if by magic when activated by UV light. Fans will know that the tat is a take on the Marauder’s Map, which features in the books. The map was created by James Potter, along with Serius Black, Petter Pettigrew and Remus Lupin during their time at Hogwarts.

Many users have been inspired by the tattoo and "do solemnly swear" that they will be joining the glow-in-the-dark party. However, some critics have questioned how safe the luminescent ink is, as no one knows its lasting effects.

When the snap made its way over to Reddit, one user didn’t waste any time in expressing their concern with the ink. They wrote:

"Most reputable tattoo shops are still avoiding photo luminescent inks. It’s not so much a matter of ‘proven safety’ as it is a matter of ‘garbage product’.

Most photo luminescent pigment is made by third rate suppliers and are not to the standard professionals insist upon. If Eternal or Fusion ever start making a luminescent pigment... call me, until then.... I am all set."

With this in mind, it’s probably best that you do your research before you all start rushing to your local tattoo parlour. If these internet experts are anything to go by, it may do more harm than good.

In other tattoo-related news, on the next page you’ll find a heartwarming video of a grandmother’s emotional reaction to a portrait of her on her granddaughter’s arm.

The impressive tat was initially posted to Imgur by user LittleFart (what a great name). They titled the following picture: "Harry Potter Marauder’s Map Tattoo, With Words That Appear Under Black Light." The design is so extraordinary because it uses UV ink, meaning that it reveals a secret message as if by magic when activated by UV [...]


So What Exactly Can I Do With My Newly Transplanted Penis?

U.S.. doctors have transplanted lungs, hearts, kidneys, livers — even faces. But surgeons at Massachusetts General Hospital made history this month when they completed the country's first penis transplant.

The patient, 64-year-old Thomas Manning, sustained "severe injuries" when equipment fell on him at work in 2012, the New York Times reported. While Manning was being treated at the hospital, doctors noticed a growth on his penis and diagnosed him with life-threatening penile cancer. Doctors removed "most of his penis," leaving him with "a stump about an inch long."

Manning had to sit down to pee and couldn't have intimate relationships with women, he told the Times. But a penis transplant wasn't possible at the time. It had been attempted only twice worldwide — and only once successfully, in South Africa. But Manning "kept my eye on the prize," he said.

After three and a half years of research, surgeons at MGH performed Manning's penis transplant earlier this month, the hospital announced today. Doctors are "cautiously optimistic" that it'll return the functions Manning lost in his 2012 amputation.

Eventually, the surgery may help treat soldiers with genitourinary injuries. More than 1,300 men in the military sustained genitourinary injuries between 2001 and 2013, the Times reported in December.

"We are delighted to have taken the first steps to help those patients who have suffered silently for far too long," Dr. Dicken Ko, one of the surgeons who led the procedure, said in a statement.

More than 1,300 men in the military sustained genitourinary injuries between 2001 and 2013.

First, surgeons have to procure a donor penis matching the patient's skin tone and blood type.

"The penis donor must be fairly young and have very healthy blood vessels to prevent erectile dysfunction," Dr. Amy Friedman, medical director at LiveOnNY, said in an emailed statement on Monday. "As with any organ, if it didn't function in the donor, it won't function in the recipient."

Then, to perform the transplant, surgeons need to attach it to the patient's arteries, veins, nerves, skin and urethra.

It isn't an easy process. "The blood vessels that are attached to penis are quite small," Dr. Lee Zhao, an assistant professor of Urology at NYU Langone Medical Center who wasn't involved in Manning's penis transplant, said in a phone call Monday. He put it this way: If the artery to a kidney is 1 centimeter, the artery to a penis may only be 2 or 3 millimeters.

"The techniques to do some of the connections for those blood vessels and nerves have taken a long time to develop," Zhao said.

That's the goal. Manning's new penis will allow urine to pass through it, and doctors are "cautiously optimistic that sexual function will be restored," according to a fact sheet.

That may take time, according to Johns Hopkins Hospital, where a penis transplant program is also underway. Nerves grow at a rate of 1 millimeter per day — or 1 inch per month. "We anticipate that achieving function, including urinary and sexual functioning, could take between six to 12 months," its website says.

The procedure is similar to cases where patients have severed their own penises and need to have them reattached, Zhao said. In those situations, "patients are able to achieve erections."

As for ejaculation, "it occurs in male patients who do not have a penis," Zhao said. "That should not be affected." Like urine, the semen will flow through the reattached urethra.

Fathering children is possible, too — provided a patient's testes are still intact. In fact, the recipient of the world's first penis transplant conceived a child with his girlfriend last year, CNN reported.

Physically speaking, losing a penis isn't life-threatening, like heart failure. Are penis transplants worth a lifetime of immunosuppressant drugs, which come with a number of unpleasant side effects?

"Since there are alternative techniques for making a penis, you really have to weigh the risks and benefits of doing a penis transplant," Zhao said.

One alternative technique is constructing a "neophallus" — a new penis made from tissue from a patient's forearm or thigh. Patients with a neophallus require a penile prosthesis to achieve an erection, Zhao said. They don't need to take immunosuppressants, since their new organs come from their own bodies.

But in some cases — such as the wounded soldiers approved for penis transplants at Johns Hopkins — patients have lost too much tissue from their penises to construct a neophallus, according to Popular Science. If they want to restore their penises, transplantation is the only option.

Future transplants mean we'll need more donors. "Perhaps this will encourage additional people to understand the importance of organ donation in a much more personal way," Friedman, of LiveOnNY, said. "When people have empathy for others, they are more likely to donate."

Here's How Penis Transplants Actually Work — And What a Transplanted Penis Can Do

Health, penis transplant, penis, organ transplant, Science


@AUS10NICHOLS moves on from @SophiaBush with actress from "Nashville"

Former "One Tree Hill" actor Austin Nichols is reportedly dating bright, young thing Chloe Bennet from "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D."

E! News reports the two are getting hot and heavy with PDA all over Hollywood. At 33, Nichols is 12 years older than his 21-year-old lady love.

Before getting together, this duo was all about dating others onset. Nichols was previously in a relationship with his "One Tree Hill" co-star Sophia Bush from 2006 to 2012. Bennet, also a small-screen alum (she played Hailey on "Nashville"), briefly cozied up to the musical drama's male lead Sam Palladio.

Austin Nichols & Chloe Bennet Are Reportedly Dating

Hot new couple alert!

Former "One Tree Hill" actor Austin Nichols is reportedly dating bright, young thing

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Melrose Castle, in Virginia's horse and wine-rich Fauquier County, was built by the husband of a shipping heiress, between 1856 and 1860. After that it served as both a Confederate hospital and a Union encampment.

What happened between then and now that's put the castle in foreclosure? Listing agent Steve Gardner tells HuffPost he "doesn't know the history," but that there's been "a lot of curiosity" since Melrose Castle went on the market for $1.5 million about a month ago.

Looking through the listing photos, it's not hard to see why, at least for those who are inclined to think of themselves as the main character in a gorgeous, if ultimately tragic, novel.

The five-bedroom castle, which sits on 50 acres, with horse facilities and an in-ground pool, is also "priced pretty well," says Gardner, because it "needs some work."

If Your Dream Is To Live In A Castle, This One's In Foreclosure

This massive castle is unbelievably romantic -- except maybe for the whole foreclosure thing.

Melrose Castle, in Virginia's horse and wine-rich Fauqui...

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There are very few things that $78.5 billion can't buy you. Unfortunately for Bill Gates, the title of richest man in the world is one of them.

Amancio Ortega, best known as the founder of Zara, inched past Gates when shares of Inditex (Zara's parent company) went up 2.5 percent Wednesday. It was an increase which equated to $1.7 billion for Ortega. He is now worth an estimated $79.5 billion.

This isn't the first time Ortega's won the world's richest designation. Back in October 2015, Inditex shares soared, and he claimed the title. But the stocks quickly fell, and Gates returned to the top of the list.

It is anticipated that the honor will continue to change hands as the stock market fluctuates over the coming months.

However, it should be noted that Gates's impressive philanthropic legacy has greatly impacted his fortune, with Forbes estimating he has donated $31 billion in his lifetime. If Gates had kept the money for himself, no one would even come close to his net worth.

He may not be the world's richest man, but that's quite the consolation prize.

Bill Gates is no longer the richest man in the world - Yahoo Finance ...

Read 'Bill Gates is no longer the richest man in the world' on Yahoo Finance Canada . Meet the man who ousted him.


24 brutally honest confessions from a sex therapist

Yes, your genitals are perfectly normal, and no, we’re not unshockable.

We’re therapists, not sexual-technique coaches. Our work is basically problem-solving: helping couples communicate about sex, helping individuals feel more confident sexually, and working through deeper issues around love and relationships. We certainly don’t stand in the corner of bedrooms with a clipboard.

2. And we don’t have sex with our patients either.

You’re thinking of sex surrogates, and that’s a very different thing. Surrogates work closely with individuals who are having sexual problems, and part of that work can involve having sex with their clients. We just talk about sex – we don’t do it.

3. People have absolutely no idea how to react when we tell them what we do.

And the responses we do get tend to be inappropriate, e.g. "Ooh, I could do with some help from you!" or "Well, a sex therapist is the last thing I need, I get laid all the time." Come on, we just met you at a party, we don’t need to know that.

4. We sometimes use explicit photographs to help us explain concepts and reassure people.

Sometimes, the only way to explain something clearly is to use quite graphic photographs. Some couples aren’t happy about seeing them, but realising what a broad range of genital sizes, sexual positions, sexual acts, options, and body shapes there is out there can help them feel better about themselves.

5. We also use sex-ed charts and diagrams to help people get to grips with their partner’s anatomy.

Occasionally we might use 3D models as well. It’s hard to pleasure someone else if you’re not sure how their equipment works. A lot of men think the cervix is on the outside of the vagina, for example, which can cause quite a bit of confusion.

6. We do a lot of work with older people.

A lot of retirement age couples find their sex life has been gradually dropping off for years, and worry they might never have sex again if they don’t fix it. We tend to give these couples exercises to help them reconnect, starting with holding hands and cuddling, then moving on to kissing and sexual touching.

7. We also see a lot of couples whose sex lives have taken a dive after having kids.

Just because the doctor says it’s OK to have sex again six weeks after childbirth, that doesn’t mean things immediately snap back into place. A woman might find she’s too sore, or self-conscious, or both parents might simply be too tired. We often end up comforting new parents and reassuring them that the situation is normal.

8. Lots of couples we work with have issues that can be solved with just a bit of communication.

Many couples can have sex but can’t bring themselves to talk about the details, i.e. what they enjoy most. This in turn can put people off sex, because they find it unsatisfying but they can’t face asking their partner to change their technique. Our sessions help people open up about what really gives them pleasure.

9. Other clients have never explored their bodies, so they’re not sure what they do enjoy.

Masturbation and self-exploration (sometimes involving looking at your genitals in a mirror) can help you get to know your body and learn about what feels good for you. In turn, this will help you guide your partners to those sweet, sensitive spots.

10. A sexless relationship is seen as a massive taboo.

But if both partners are comfortable with that, why should it be? It’s seen as the worst thing in the world, but some very loving relationships do end up being nonsexual for various reasons, and we can help people come to terms with this.

11. Fifty Shades of Grey caused us lots of problems.

Suddenly couples were showing up in our offices, often upset because one partner had tried to act out their Fifty Shades fantasies and the other didn’t want to. The novels don’t contain much clear or helpful information about how to start experimenting with BDSM. It should be approached very carefully and sensitively.

12. You have to have a good sense of humour to do our job.

We do find some of the stuff our clients say pretty darn funny, especially the misconceptions about anatomy ("I fingered her ovaries!"), and we do talk about some of the funniest things outside work, but we’d never tell anyone your name, or go into loads of detail about the ins and outs (heh) of your sex drive and habits.

13. And sometimes we really don’t know what to say.

Just when we think we’ve heard it all, someone will always surprise us with a new fetish. Even though we’re pretty unshockable, we might still need a second to gather our thoughts if you tell us you love sticking wooden spoons up your butt while masturbating to old episodes of Gordon Ramsey’s Kitchen Nightmares.

14. It can be really emotionally draining as well.

Obviously sex problems don’t just appear from nowhere, and sometimes we hear some really traumatic things that have happened in people’s pasts. We’re trained to deal with this, of course, but it can be a daunting, painful process.

15. We don’t ask people to tell us their fantasies.

We might suggest you write down your fantasies and discuss them with your partner if you feel comfortable with that, but you don’t have to tell us your deepest, darkest, most unusual desires. Unless you really want to, of course.

16. Women often say they’re disappointed that they can’t orgasm the "real" way.

And by that, they mean penetrative intercourse. But the reality is that the clitoris and the opening of the vagina aren’t always positioned in a way that makes it possible, and a lot of women feel self-conscious pleasuring themselves during sex. We work hard to explain there’s no real, right, or (particularly) wrong way to do things.

17. Men tend to present with problems about erections and ejaculation.

Porn makes it seem like every man has a massive dick and has no problem at all keeping an erection, lasting for hours in bed, and ejaculating at the end of it all. There’s also a feeling that you’re less of a man if you don’t perform as expected. We might end up referring some clients to a doctor if their problems are medical.

18. And as women get older, dryness and related pain during sex can start to be an issue.

Again, this is perfectly normal and doesn’t mean you don’t find your partner attractive, or feel horny, but it can take a while to come to terms with these physical changes and understand what’s causing them. Thankfully, lube exists.

19. Mismatched levels of desire are common too.

If one person in a relationship wants sex more than their partner, they often end up feeling very hurt whenever they’re turned down. Learning to compromise can really help in this situation, as can finding ways to take the sting out of rejection: like kissing, cuddling, and finding other ways to be intimate with each other.

20. There’s a lot of pressure to have a "perfect" or generally amazing sex life.

There are so many strange ideas floating around about how much sex "typical" people should be having. Some people book appointments in a panic because they’re only having sex four nights a week and it used to be seven. Yes, we’re sex therapists, but we’d be the first to admit that sex isn’t the be-all and end-all.

21. Which means the most common question we get asked is: "Am I normal?"

Meaning "Do I/we have a normal amount of sex?" or "Do I last for the normal amount of time?" There’s an easy answer to this – nothing is normal! Instead of trying to fit in with what you’ve seen on TV, in magazines, or in porn films, explore what you want, what you enjoy, and what your specific desires are.

22. Also, your genitals are perfectly OK, honestly.

A lot of clients feel self conscious about their vagina or penis and decide it looks "weird", especially compared to porn. We have diagrams, drawings, and photos that show how vastly different people’s hoo-hahs and willies are, which helps.

23. Laughter and sex don’t have to be incompatible.

Once sex starts to become "serious" or "an issue", i.e. something you’re going to therapy for, it feels more pressured. Laughter can help diffuse that tension and get things back on track. Sex games, roleplay, and toys are fantastic ways to start, but don’t take it too far and dress as a clown (unless you really want to).

24. And we feel genuinely delighted when we work our sex magic and help people past a problem.

We can tell that things are going well thanks to the spring in their step and the smile on their faces when they come back to see us. Congratulations, guys! Keep it up.

This post was put together with the help of a trained relationship and couples therapist, as well as this AMA on Reddit.

24 Brutally Honest Confessions From A Sex Therapist


Another sign of anxiety is specific, irrational fear. This could be a fear of an object, activity or situation, for example. But this symptom might be harder to spot, because people with phobias tend to form avoidance behaviour. This means you, possibly subconsciously, avoid the phobia, therefore reducing the fear and not realising the severity of the problem.

Sufferers of anxiety are more likely to experience high-arousal states, when the sympathetic nervous system is activated. This puts the body in fight or flight mode, and subconsciously tenses muscles so they're prepared to see off the perceived threat.

The mind and the digestive system are closely linked, and research has found that stress and anxiety can cause digestive problems, such as symptoms associated with irritable bowel syndrome.

There is a close relationship between sleep and anxiety. If you notice your sleeping patterns change, you find it more difficult to sleep or become more tired, this could be a sign of anxiety. And this can become a vicious cycle; a lack of sleep can contribute to stress and anxiety levels. The mental health charity Mind has some good advice for getting a better night's sleep.

Prolonged anxiety can weaken your immune system, and result in you suffering from more viruses.

Anxiety becomes a disorder when it interferes with your everyday life. It can make it difficult to maintain relationships, to concentrate on something for a prolonged period of time, to hold down a job, and to relax.

If you or someone you know is suffering from anxiety, visit Anxiety UK for advice and support.

If you have any of these symptoms you may have an anxiety disorder The list

Anxiety is part of our lives, but it can sometimes be difficult to notice when it becomes a problem. Here are seven signs your anxiety might have progressed into a disorder, and it's time to see your doctor: 1. Excessive worry Worrying is something we all do now and again, but if your worrying is repetitive, it focuses on hypothetical problems, or it starts to disrupt your life, it could be a sign of something more serious.


The truth about how often you should shower

A survey last year revealed that four out of five women don’t shower every day, while a third said they could go three days without washing.

Another study, conducted by researchers at the Universities of Manchester, Edinburgh, Lancaster and Southampton, showed that three-quarters of respondents had at least one shower or bath a day.

But are we overshowering? And is there a ‘correct’ number of showers or baths we should be having a week?

According to Professor Stephen Shumack, President of the Australasian College of Dermatologists, you should only shower when you need to.

Speaking to the Sunday Morning Herald, he said: "It's only in the last fifty to sixty years (since the advent of bathrooms with showers) that the idea of a daily shower has become commonplace. The pressure to do that is actually social pressure rather than actual need. It's become popular because of the social need to smell good. But it's only the glands in your armpit and groin that produce body odour. They're not all over the body."

Shumack also warned that a hot daily shower could do more damage than good, saying: "Overwashing causes 'defatting' of the skin – getting rid of the natural body oils we produce to protect the skin cells. This can cause actual damage making them more permeable to bacteria or viruses, precipitating itchy skin, dryness, flakiness and worsening conditions like eczema."

One professor argues that as long as you’re focusing on the ‘right areas’, you shouldn’t need to shower too often. John Oxford, Professor of Virology at Queen Mary's School of Medicine and Dentistry, told the Daily Mail: 'As long as people wash their hands often enough and pay attention to the area of the body below the belt, showering or bathing every other day would do no harm."

This shower head can stop you wasting so much water

For those of you that worry you may be spending too long in the shower, a new showerhead from Hydrao can alert you to when you've spent too much time washing by changing colour. By using your smartphone, you can set your desired water consumption rate which then syncs with the showerhead.

There are conflicting views as to how many times a week we should shower. Depending on your hair and skin type, you may be told that showering every day could be better for your skin - or, in fact, worse for your skin if it’s particularly sensitive. Overshowering can cause adverse effects to hair such as causing split-ends, while excessive use of product could result in product build-up.

showering, Personal care, Healthy Living, Health & Families, Lifestyle


The Royal Family has a hamster—with an adorable name!

Introducing His Royal Highness, Marvin the Hamster!

During an outing with school children in London on Wednesday, Princess Kate revealed that the royal family has a tiny new member.

During a chat with kids at the new Magic Garden playground at Hampton Court Palace, 9-year-old Darcey reported that the royal mom "said she had a hamster, and [Princess] Charlotte really likes it because the whiskers always tickle her face."

Earlier in the outing, Kate revealed that Charlotte’s big brother, Prince George , would have been "a bit scared" of the playground’s 25-ft. dragon. But the school children in attendance were charmed by the real-life royal in their midst.

As Kate toured the garden, one youngster tugged on the sleeve of the chairman of Historic Royal Palaces, Rupert Gavin, and asked him: "Who’s that?"

"Then the child said, ‘Ooh, are you the princess?’ " says Gavin.

She said: "Just call me Kate." (When Kate herself had asked the kids her name, they chorused, "Princess Kate!")

For the school children, it was hard to tell which was the most thrilling part of the day: the arrival of the Duchess or a trip down the playground’s impressive slide.

"I said, ‘Would you like to go down the slide?’ " Aqeelah Raamah, 7, shared. "She said she is going to bring her jeans and trainers next time so she can go down.

Kate Middleton Reveals Royal Family Has a Hamster Named Marvin

"She said Charlotte really likes it because the whiskers always tickle her face,"

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"I was naïve enough to believe I had all the answers. I'm still kicking myself in the butt for that."

Former University of Wisconsin and Denver Broncos running back Montee Ball says he drank heavily throughout his college and NFL careers, and that through counseling he has accepted he is an alcoholic.

Now sober, Ball is enrolled at Wisconsin for summer classes. He told the Sporting News that his heavy drinking began in 2011, his junior season for the Badgers, and throughout his brief NFL career when he would get drunk four times a week.

He said he regrets not taking advice given to him in the NFL seriously.

"I wouldn't take any of it seriously," Ball told the Sporting News. "I was naïve enough to think my playing days would last forever. I would literally sit in the back of the room texting or being on Instagram not paying attention to the professional explaining to me about preparing for life after football and how important it is.

"I failed to use my platform to help others and to use the NFL as a steppingstone in life. I surrounded myself with bad people, not on the team but in the city. I was naïve enough to believe I had all the answers. I'm still kicking myself in the butt for that."

Ball said Broncos running backs coach Eric Studesville told him after one meeting that he could smell alcohol on his breath.

"He talked about how he could smell the alcohol on me and that he thinks I may have a problem with drinking," Ball told the website. "He said if I needed any help with that he could reach out to people I could talk to. I didn't listen to him."

The Broncos waived Ball in 2015 after selecting him in the second round of the 2013 draft. The New England Patriots signed him to their practice squad in 2015, but he never played a game for the team. He watched the Broncos win Super Bowl 50 over the Carolina Panthers from his jail cell after he was arrested on a felony battery charge Feb. 5 of last year.

"It brought tears to my eyes," he told the Sporting News. "At one point, I was on top of the world and now watching the team that cut me a few months prior from a jail cell, that stung a lot."

He was sentenced to 60 days in jail last August after pleading guilty to disorderly conduct and battery for his role in two domestic abuse incidents.

In the Feb. 5 incident, his girlfriend told police he had thrown her across a Madison hotel room. A month later, a previous girlfriend told police she had been assaulted by Ball in 2014. He told the Sporting News that he has evidence to show the previous girlfriend was lying but decided to accept a plea deal as he was facing six charges, including two felonies, and didn't think he would receive a fair trial because he is black and because of his history.

Also last year, Ball learned he was a father when a past girlfriend from Denver told him in a telephone call that she was pregnant. He says the birth of his son, Maverick, "was the turning point" for him as he "realized I have a purpose to raise that kid."

His addiction and mental health therapist told the Sporting News that Ball's turnaround began last summer.

"He acknowledged being an alcoholic, which is a significant thing, and coming from a domestic violence background himself," Cory Devine told the website. "He recognized, 'This is a pattern I've got to stop. It's my responsibility to do so.'"

Ball told the Sporting News that alcoholism runs in his family, starting with his grandfather and then his father.

Now back as a student at Wisconsin, he told the website he is "focused on improving my image and relationships I destroyed." He said he hopes to open a charitable foundation and is writing a book about his struggle with alcoholism.

Ex-NFL RB Montee Ball reveals he would get drunk 4 times a week

Former Wisconsin and NFL running back Montee Ball told the Sporting News that alcoholism contributed to his downfall and his legal troubles. He now is sober and enrolled back in school.

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Have Children? Here’s How Kids Ruin Your Romantic Relationship

Lots of women look forward to motherhood – getting to know a tiny baby, raising a growing child, developing a relationship with a maturing son or daughter. All over the world, people believe that parenting is the most rewarding part of life. And it’s good that so many mothers treasure that bond with their child, because the transition to parenthood causes profound changes in a woman’s marriage and her overall happiness... and not for the better.

Families usually welcome a baby to the mix with great expectations. But as a mother’s bond with a child grows, it’s likely that her other relationships are deteriorating. I surveyed decades of studies on the psychological effects of having a child to write my book "Great Myths of Intimate Relationships: Dating, Sex, and Marriage," and here’s what the research literature shows.

When people marry, they’re usually in love and happy to be tying the knot. But after that, things tend to change. On average, couples' satisfaction with their marriage declines during the first years of marriage and, if the decline is particularly steep, divorce may follow. The course of true love runs downhill. And that’s before you factor in what happens when it’s time to start buying a carseat and diapers.

For around 30 years, researchers have studied how having children affects a marriage, and the results are conclusive: the relationship between spouses suffers once kids come along. Comparing couples with and without children, researchers found that the rate of the decline in relationship satisfaction is nearly twice as steep for couples who have children than for childless couples. In the event that a pregnancy is unplanned, the parents experience even greater negative impacts on their relationship.

The irony is that even as the marital satisfaction of new parents declines, the likelihood of them divorcing also declines. So, having children may make you miserable, but you’ll be miserable together.

Worse still, this decrease in marital satisfaction likely leads to a change in general happiness, because the biggest predictor of overall life satisfaction is one’s satisfaction with their spouse.

While the negative marital impact of becoming parents is familiar to fathers and mothers, it is especially insidious because so many young couples think that having children will bring them closer together or at least will not lead to marital distress. Yet, this belief, that having children will improve one’s marriage, is a tenacious and persistent myth among those who are young and in love.

It seems obvious that adding a baby to a household is going to change its dynamics. And indeed, the arrival of children changes how couples interact. Parents often become more distant and businesslike with each other as they attend to the details of parenting. Mundane basics like keeping kids fed, bathed and clothed take energy, time and resolve. In the effort to keep the family running smoothly, parents discuss carpool pickups and grocery runs, instead of sharing the latest gossip or their thoughts on presidential elections. Questions about one’s day are replaced with questions about whether this diaper looks full.

These changes can be profound. Fundamental identities may shift – from wife to mother, or, at a more intimate level, from lovers to parents. Even in same-sex couples, the arrival of children predicts less relationship satisfaction and sex. Beyond sexual intimacy, new parents tend to stop saying and doing the little things that please their spouses. Flirty texts are replaced with messages that read like a grocery receipt.

With nearly half of all births being to unmarried couples, some parents may think they have gamed the system by skipping the wedding. Not so. The relationship burden of having children is present regardless of marital status, gender orientation or level of income. In addition, the adverse impact of becoming a parent is found in other countries, including those with greater rates of nonmarital parenting and more generous family policies.

Not surprisingly, it is mothers, not fathers, who bear the heaviest cost of becoming parents. Even when both parents work outside the home and even in marriages in which both spouses describe themselves as sharing the burden of household chores, most parents slide toward gender-stereotypical ways of parenting. Women are more likely to become the "on call" parent, the one who gets up in the night to bring a child a tissue or who’s called by the school nurse.

As part of this pattern, new mothers tend to cut their hours in outside work, which often leads fathers to feel more of the burden of financial responsibility. A common pattern emerges in which dads start spending more time and energy on outside work and moms start doing an increasing percentage of the childcare and housework. Cue the feelings of frustration, guilt and distress for both parents.

New mothers often talk about their social isolation, becoming disconnected from friends and colleagues and how their world feels like it’s shrinking. All of these changes lead to fundamental and long-lasting effects on new mothers' circle of support, including with their spouses.

The consequences of the relationship strain can be serious. Marital stress is associated with many serious physical health problems as well as symptoms of depression and other mental health problems. The link between psychological and marital problems is strong enough that researchers have found that couples therapy is one of the most effective ways of treating depression and some other mental illnesses.

If the arrival of children is hard on marriages, is the departure of children good for marriages? Some marriages do improve once the children leave the nest. In other cases, the successful launch of the children leads spouses to discover they have few shared interests and there’s nothing keeping them together.

These downsides to having children may partly explain why more and more women in the United States and around the world are choosing not to procreate. According to the U.S. Census, the percent of childless American women (ages 15-44) increased a staggering amount in just two generations: from 35 percent in 1976 to 47 percent in 2010.

Despite the dismal picture of motherhood painted by researchers like me (sorry Mom), most mothers (and fathers) rate parenting as their greatest joy. Much like childbirth, where nearly all mothers believe the pain and suffering was worth it, most mothers believe the rewards of watching their children grow up is worth the cost to their romantic relationships.