Hero, Inc Part 1: Calling All Heroes
by Nate Cull (1996)
Genres: Superhero

You play as J. Random Hero, Fairhaven's newest hero if you answer the call to duty from Hero, Inc. by entering their contest and performing several feats of heroism. Don't wait! Enter the contest now and you may win their Grand Prize!

action: %
response: GlkTADS - A text-only TADS 2.5.3 Interpreter.

Maintained by Stephen Granade <sgranade@phy.duke.edu>

CONGRATULATIONS!
You may already be a winner!

Have you ever wondered what life is about? Do you look for happiness but never find it? Does joy, fulfilment, and the answer to world peace always slip right through your fingers? Are you thinking right now, "I'm a born loser?"

Well, we at Hero, Inc once thought that too! Until we found the ultimate answer to all of these questions and more. And, for a limited time only, we've decided to make OUR happiness YOURS! Yes, you can be a hero too! Simply fill out the handy Special Introductory Offer Form attached and all your dreams could be about to come true!

One lucky winner will receive a FREE all-expenses paid Passport to the Heroic Adventure of a lifetime! (*) Runners up receive thousands of dollars (**) worth in prizes! There are NO STRINGS ATTACHED! NONE! (***)

Sincerely yours,
The Manager,
Hero, Inc

(*) - Actual length of lifetime may vary depending on participant.
(**) - Dollar values are an estimated equivalent only.
(***) - None that can be considered legally binding.

HERO, INC Part One
"Calling All Heroes"
An Interactive Fantasy

This is your bedroom. It would be hard to find a more ordinary room, or a more ordinary house, than this. It contains a perfectly normal bed, a completely everyday desk, and a decidedly un-heroic cupboard. A door to the north leads out to the quite average hallway beyond.

Sitting on the desk is a letter.
action: You examine desk
response: On the desk you see a letter.
action: You examine the letter
response: The letter, which you read in the introduction, is addressed to J. Random Hero. There appears to be a Special Introductory Offer form attached.
action: You get it
response: Taken.
action: You read it
response: CONGRATULATIONS!
You may already be a winner!

Have you ever wondered what life is about? Do you look for happiness but never find it? Does joy, fulfilment, and the answer to world peace always slip right through your fingers? Are you thinking right now, "I'm a born loser?"

Well, we at Hero, Inc once thought that too! Until we found the ultimate answer to all of these questions and more. And, for a limited time only, we've decided to make OUR happiness YOURS! Yes, you can be a hero too! Simply fill out the handy Special Introductory Offer Form attached and all your dreams could be about to come true!

One lucky winner will receive a FREE all-expenses paid Passport to the Heroic Adventure of a lifetime! (*) Runners up receive thousands of dollars (**) worth in prizes! There are NO STRINGS ATTACHED! NONE! (***)

Sincerely yours,
The Manager,
Hero, Inc

(*) - Actual length of lifetime may vary depending on participant.
(**) - Dollar values are an estimated equivalent only.
(***) - None that can be considered legally binding.

There does indeed appear to be a Special Introductory Offer form attached.
action: Examine form
response: To make your choice, tick either the first or second box.

YES! I WANT TO BE A GUARANTEED WINNER! Please rush me IMMEDIATELY your Special Introductory Offer Pack with all the information I need to enter Hero, Inc's amazing once-in-a-lifetime adventure opportunity!

I understand there is ABSOLUTELY NO OBLIGATION and that I can withdraw from the contest at any time if I am in any way disappointed.

(There is a large box about 1 inch square beside this statement).

NO, I AM A WIMP. I don't even want to think about heroic deeds, let alone try something I know I'm going to fail at horribly. In fact, I think I'll jump off the Post Office Tower right now and end my miserable life. I'm not signing anything. Just go away and leave me alone.

(There is no second box).
action: Tick box
response: What do you want to tick it with?
action: Inventory
response: You have a letter.
action: You look around
response: This is your bedroom. It would be hard to find a more ordinary room, or a more ordinary house, than this. It contains a perfectly normal bed, a completely everyday desk, and a decidedly un-heroic cupboard. A door to the north leads out to the quite average hallway beyond.
action: You examine the cupboard
response: The cupboard is closed.
action: You open it
response: Opening the cupboard reveals a ballpoint pen.
action: You get the pen
response: Taken.
action: Tick box
response: (with the ballpoint pen)
You carefully tick the large box with the ballpoint pen. No sooner is the ink dry than the letter begins to vibrate! As you watch, it shrinks, warps, and turns itself inside out, sealing the enclosed Special Introductory Offer form into a cleverly pre-printed envelope.
action: You go to the north
response: This hallway connects the various rooms which make up your perfectly ordinary house. Your bedroom is south, the bathroom is east, the kitchen is north, and the lounge is west.
action: You go to the west
response: The lounge is the most impressive room in your house. A giant large-screen TV takes pride of place against one wall, and an equally imposing soft and comfy sofa sits facing it. To the west is your front door (closed), and smaller doors lead northeast to the kitchen and east to the hall.

Sitting on the TV set is a video cassette.

With a sudden pang of terrible guilt, you remember that the videotape is overdue. You move unconsciously to pick the cursed thing up before you forget it again.
action: You open the door
response: Opened.
action: You go west
response: You are outside your ordinary house, the front door of which is open to the east. It is a bright sunny day, and birds are singing happily from the trees at each side of the street. Maple Drive leads north and south from here, and Post Office Park is to the west.
action: Go west
response: (Closing your front door)
Post Office Park
You are walking in Post Office Park, a quaint old grassy field extending to the road in all directions. In the distance you can see your house, a garage, some stores, the library and school, and of course the very new and modern Post Office Tower to the north. Before you, in the centre of the park, is a dingy old dribbling fountain.

A child runs past, laughing.
action: You go north
response: You are standing outside the very new and extremely modern Post Office Tower, a shining monument to Fairhaven's progress, standing a full fifteen stories tall. You can enter the lobby to the north, or walk into the equally famous (though much older) Post Office Park to the south. Elm Street continues east and west.
action: Go north
response: Post Office Tower, lobby
You are in the shining new ground-floor lobby of the Post Office Tower. The sheer size and architectural elegance of this room takes your breath away. A plaque and call button are mounted on the north wall, next to the lift doors (which are closed). The grand entrance doors to the south lead back out to the street.
action: You examine the plaque
response: Floor  1 ........... Lobby
Floor  3 ........... Post Office
Floor  8 ........... Fairhaven Bank
Floor 15 ........... Observation Deck

All other floors are off-limits to the public.
action: Go north
response: You are in the Post Office Tower's sleek, ultra-modern lift car.
Beside the doors to the south (currently open) is a sleek, futuristic keypad and display.
action: You go to the south
response: Post Office Tower, Floor 3
This large, bustling room must be the new Post Office. A steady flow of customers make their way up to the counter, where a lone mail clerk stands ready to serve them. The sleek, ultra-modern lift opens to the north.

The mail clerk shuffles some papers.
action: You give the envelope to the clerk
response: The clerk takes the envelope, nods, and drops it into a bin. "Same day delivery, I see. We'll have the reply delivered to you before you know it. Thanks for using the Post Office!"
action: You go to the south
response: Post Office Tower, lobby
You are in the shining new ground-floor lobby of the Post Office Tower. The sheer size and architectural elegance of this room takes your breath away. A plaque and call button are mounted on the north wall, next to the lift doors (which are open). The grand entrance doors to the south lead back out to the street.
action: Go east
response: You are on the pavement outside Fairhaven's public school, which runs to the northeast. Elm Street runs west of here, and Maple Drive starts to the south.
action: You go south
response: You are walking in Post Office Park, a quaint old grassy field extending to the road in all directions. In the distance you can see your house, a garage, some stores, the library and school, and of course the very new and modern Post Office Tower to the north. Before you, in the centre of the park, is a dingy old dribbling fountain.

Some birds chirrup as you walk past.
action: Go south
response: You are outside a small garage which sells petrol and services motor vehicles. The workshop opens to the south, and Oak Street continues east and west. To the north, Post Office Park is visible.
action: You go to the east
response: You are on a quiet street corner in the little town of Fairhaven.
Maple Drive runs north from here to your house, while Oak Street runs west. A rusty old manhole (closed) is set squarely in the middle of the road.
action: Go north
response: You are outside your ordinary house, the front door of which is closed to the east. It is a bright sunny day, and birds are singing happily from the trees at each side of the street. Maple Drive leads north and south from here, and Post Office Park is to the west.
action: You go east
response: (Opening your front door)
(Closing your front door)
Lounge
The lounge is the most impressive room in your house. A giant large-screen TV takes pride of place against one wall, and an equally imposing soft and comfy sofa sits facing it. To the west is your front door (closed), and smaller doors lead northeast to the kitchen and east to the hall.

You see a parcel here.
action: You examine the parcel
response: It's addressed to:

J. Random Hero
Maple Drive
Fairhaven

and stamped: URGENT! HERO, INC SPECIAL INTRODUCTORY OFFER PACK!

The parcel is closed.
action: You open it
response: Opening the parcel reveals a pair of 3D glasses, a digital watch, a yellow Magic Marker, a plastic cape, and a packing slip.
action: You look at the slip
response: HERO, INC SPECIAL INTRODUCTORY OFFER PACK

Please find enclosed the following:
1 x Sword of Virtue
1 x Amulet of Counsel
1 x Cape of Many Things (Deluxe Hero Edition)
1 x Nth-Dimensional Imager (pair)

General Instructions:

Congratulations on entering the Hero, Inc Adventure Of A Lifetime Contest. In order to qualify for the Grand Prize, all applicants must report to the Convention Site in their local town with proof of their heroic exploits, no later than midnight on the date of the contest.
The Hero equipment enclosed is provided for your safety and comfort, please use it. New applicants may experience some disorientation adjusting to dimension shifts, this is quite normal and does not in any way indicate a fault in the imaging equipment. Hero, Inc shall not be liable in any way, legal or otherwise, for loss of health, existence or sanity caused by taking part in this Contest.
action: You get Amulet
response: You've already got your hands full.
action: You look at what you're carrying with you
response: You have a ballpoint pen, a video cassette, and a yellow Magic Marker.
action: You drop the pen
response: Dropped.
action: You wear it
response: You slip the cape over your shoulders. Suddenly your hands feel light and free.
action: You wear it
response: As you slip the watch over your wrist, it slides to an exact comfortable fit. The watch beeps and displays: "GOOD MOVE".
action: You wear it
response: As you put the glasses over your eyes, you feel a faint tingling sensation down your spine. Everything somehow looks sharper than before.

The TV suddenly switches itself on! The sofa begins crackling with a red glow.

A deep sinister chuckle rolls out from the TV set. Black clouds and lightning flash across the screen, and a station logo appears. Choir girls chorus the words: "NYTV, The Nytemare Channel. We're Only A Scream Away."
action: Look around
response: The lounge is the most impressive room in your house. A giant large-screen TV takes pride of place against one wall, and an equally imposing soft and comfy sofa sits facing it. To the west is your front door (closed), and smaller doors lead northeast to the kitchen and east to the hall.

You see a parcel and a ballpoint pen here. The parcel seems to contain a packing slip.

The sofa is surrounded by a crackling red glow. You feel a strong static force pulling you towards it.

"Hey there, this is Drac Thornwood telling YOU to watch NYTV, The Nytemare Channel. Don't even THINK of touching that dial, 'cos have we got one HELL of a great lineup for you tonight! But first, a word from our sponsor!"
action: You get the pen
response: Taken.

The screen goes to an ad break.

"When you see crime, pollution, toxic waste, social breakdown, and nuclear Armageddon, who do you think of? The Nytemare Corporation, that's who. We're the world leader in all these fields and more. So remember, next time you need a disaster of Biblical proportions in your neighbourhood, call us. The Nytemare Corporation. Because we know where you live."
action: Go east
response: This hallway connects the various rooms which make up your perfectly ordinary house. Your bedroom is south, the bathroom is east, the kitchen is north, and the lounge is west.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: You go to the east
response: The bathroom seems normal enough. There's a sink, toilet, and shower, and two doors leading west to the hall and north to the laundry.

There is a very strange creature in the room. It is a huge bloated balloon of a thing, covered in translucent black skin, with a puffy face and watery, bloodshot eyes which try to focus on you with some difficulty. The creature yawns and waddles drunkenly. It appears to be filling the entire laundry and most of the bathroom, as only its head and upper body is visible here. A bright red glow surrounds it.

The watch beeps and displays: "HYDROPHOBIA".

The Sword of Virtue tingles in your hands.

The Hydrophobia slurps noisily and bangs on a nearby waterpipe.
action: You examine the HYDROPHOBIA
response: It is a huge bloated balloon of a thing, covered in translucent black skin, with a puffy face and watery, bloodshot eyes which try to focus on you with some difficulty. The creature yawns and waddles drunkenly. It appears to be filling the entire laundry and most of the bathroom, as only its head and upper body is visible here. A bright red glow surrounds it.

The Hydrophobia dribbles in your general direction.
action: You attack it with Sword
response: You swing the shining yellow sword at the Hydrophobia. The sword's blade strikes the creature in a shower of yellow sparks.

The Hydrophobia does a double take.

"'Ullo, wot's this ere? An 'Ero with a bloomin' Sword of Virtue?
Well, I was just leaving anyway. I'll be seein' you around, matey. Next time, MY place."

The creature oozes at you for a moment then shrinks into the laundry and gurgles down a pipe. There is a burp from somewhere underground, followed by silence. The laundry door slowly swings open.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: You go north
response: The laundry is one of the least-visited rooms in your house, and it's not hard to see why. The single washing machine (glowing yellow) is nearly buried under a huge pile of unwashed clothes. Doors lead out to the west and south.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: You examine the machine
response: It shines with a soft yellow glow. The washing machine is closed.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: You open the machine
response: Opening the washing machine reveals a glowing spray bottle.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: You examine bottle
response: It's a spray bottle. The label reads:

New Improved WHITO!
Anti-Static Spray and Heavy-Duty Stain Remover
Product of Hero, Inc.

The bottle shines with a soft yellow glow.

Strange. You don't remember seeing this bottle before.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: You get the bottle
response: Taken.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: You go to the south
response: The bathroom seems normal enough. There's a sink, toilet, and shower, and two doors leading west to the hall and north to the laundry.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: You go west
response: This hallway connects the various rooms which make up your perfectly ordinary house. Your bedroom is south, the bathroom is east, the kitchen is north, and the lounge is west.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: Go south
response: This is your bedroom. It would be hard to find a more ordinary room, or a more ordinary house, than this. It contains a perfectly normal bed, a completely everyday desk, and a decidedly un-heroic cupboard. A door to the north leads out to the quite average hallway beyond.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: You go north
response: This is the kitchen. A bench, microwave and refrigerator all appear to be their usual selves. Doors lead south to the hall, southwest to the lounge, and east to the laundry.

You hear the TV playing in the lounge.
action: You go southwest
response: The lounge is the most impressive room in your house. A giant large-screen TV takes pride of place against one wall, and an equally imposing soft and comfy sofa sits facing it. To the west is your front door (closed), and smaller doors lead northeast to the kitchen and east to the hall.

You see a parcel here. The parcel seems to contain a packing slip.

The sofa is surrounded by a crackling red glow. You feel a strong static force pulling you towards it.

"Drac Thornwood back again. Just take a look at this season's new offerings, and I do mean OFFERINGS! We've got the Wall to Wall Horror Movie Festival, the crazy Slash 'n Chop Song Show, and of course our old favourite, the Genocide Game! All that and more, beamed right to your homes on The Nytemare Channel! But now, a bulletin from the NYTV newsroom."
action: You go to the west
response: You try to reach the door, but can't. The static force from the sofa is too strong. The presenter laughs.

"Isn't it great to stay indoors and watch your favourite channel, NYTV! We'll be here to keep you company right through till midnight."

"Yes, Drac, the rumours from Fairhaven have been confirmed. Apparently a major Hero Convention is being held in that town as we speak. Our sources are still vague but we believe this may pose the first real threat to Nytemare Corp's operations in several years. Over to you, Drac."
action: You spray the sofa with the bottle
response: You spray some Whito onto the sofa and it begins to smoke! Years of built-up static electricity absorbed from the TV set are released in an explosion of sparks and flames! Finally it cools down, a little singed but looking much cleaner.

"Well, scary stuff there indeed. We'll certainly be bringing you the latest on this story as it continues to develop. But I'm sure the Corporation will be quite able to handle this new challenge. Stay glued to your seats, viewers, while we take a short break."
action: Go west
response: As you reach the door, a gust of freezing wind and rain comes blasting in! The television image flickers.

"Hey, you folks down in Fairhaven better not go too far away from your nice comfortable houses, 'cos when that storm hits it's gonna blow - "

A thunderclap drowns his words, as a bolt of lightning strikes the TV aerial on top of your house. You hear the sound of shattering glass, then an impossibly loud explosion. Diving to the ground, you narrowly avoid being hit by shards of brick and burning wood. When you get up and look back, you see that your house has been completely demolished.

You are outside your formerly ordinary house, which is now a smouldering pile of rubble to the east. Clouds gather ominously in the sky overhead. Maple Drive leads north and south from here, and Post Office Park is to the west.
action: Go west
response: You are walking in Post Office Park, a quaint old grassy field extending to the road in all directions. In the distance you can see the ruins of your house, a garage, some stores, the library and school, and of course the very new and modern Post Office Tower to the north. Before you, in the centre of the park, is a dingy old dribbling fountain.
action: You look at the fountain
response: It's disgustingly old and dingy, and hardly even dribbling. Just looking at the stagnant water flow sends strange shivers of fear down your spine. In the fountain you see a glowing green Magic Marker.
action: Green
response: It's green. A message is engraved on the side:

If lost, return to:
Sally Knight
Room 13
Fairhaven Public School

The Magic Marker shines with a pale green glow.
action: You get it
response: The fountain is really icky and horrible. As you touch the dirty water you feel a sudden overwhelming sense of terror which makes you draw back your hand in disgust. You can hardly bring yourself to look at it again, let alone reach into it.

Dark clouds roll across the sky.
action: You hit the water with Sword
response: You swing the shining yellow sword at the fountain. The sword's blade passes through the fountain with no visible effect.
action: You go west
response: You are outside the Fairhaven Library, a worn-down old brick building with a faded billboard outside. A door leads in to the west. Beech Avenue continues north and south of here, and you can see Post Office Park to the east.
action: Go west
response: You are inside the Fairhaven library, which seems to be a refuge from another time. An electric chandelier hangs from Victorian rafters, lighting a wooden counter on which sits a computer terminal and card scanner. A stack of bookshelves is lost in deep shadow, while the main doorway opens east out to the street. The librarian sits behind his counter, reading.

The librarian jumps to his feet as you enter, and points to something you're carrying. "Get that accursed thing out of here!", he roars, pushing you towards the door. "Can't you see it's a hazard to literacy?"

You are outside the Fairhaven Library, a worn-down old brick building with a faded billboard outside. A door leads in to the west. Beech Avenue continues north and south of here, and you can see Post Office Park to the east.

A cold wind blows briefly.
action: You examine Video
response: It's a remake of "Nightmare on Elm Street Part XIII", rented from the Video Plaza, and it's overdue. You feel strangely compelled to return it as soon as possible. The tape is surrounded by a dull red glow.
action: You go to the south
response: You are on the pavement outside the Fairhaven General Store, one of the oldest shops still trading in the town. The store is open to the southwest. Beech Avenue runs off to the north, and Oak Street to the east.
action: You go to the south-west
response: You are in the town's old General Store. The shelves hold only a small selection of items, but the charming old-world atmosphere more than makes up for the lack of variety. The shopkeeper stands behind her counter ready to serve you.

You see an electric torch and a newspaper here.

The shopkeeper counts the change in her cash register.
action: You look at the shopkeeper
response: The shopkeeper checks her shelves.
action: You ask the shopkeeper about Video
response: The shopkeeper seems unable to see you.
action: You get the torch
response: That would be shoplifting. You must buy the electric torch first.
action: You go south
response: You are in the town's old General Store. The shelves hold only a small selection of items, but the charming old-world atmosphere more than makes up for the lack of variety. The shopkeeper stands behind her counter ready to serve you.

You see an electric torch and a newspaper here.

The shopkeeper dusts the counter.
action: Go east
response: You are outside a small garage which sells petrol and services motor vehicles. The workshop opens to the south, and Oak Street continues east and west. To the north, Post Office Park is visible.

People scurry indoors for shelter.
action: You go to the east
response: You are on a quiet street corner in the little town of Fairhaven.
Maple Drive runs north from here to your house, while Oak Street runs west. A rusty old manhole (closed) is set squarely in the middle of the road.
action: You open the manhole
response: Good idea, but it's too rusty to move at the moment.
action: You go east
response: You can go north to Maple Drive, west to Oak Street, or northwest to the park.

A stranger bumps into you, and mutters something rude.
action: Go north
response: You are outside your formerly ordinary house, which is now a smouldering pile of rubble to the east. Clouds gather ominously in the sky overhead. Maple Drive leads north and south from here, and Post Office Park is to the west.
action: Go north
response: You are on the pavement outside Fairhaven's public school, which runs to the northeast. Elm Street runs west of here, and Maple Drive starts to the south.
action: You go west
response: You are standing outside the very new and extremely modern Post Office Tower, a shining monument to Fairhaven's progress, standing a full fifteen stories tall. You can enter the lobby to the north, or walk into the equally famous (though much older) Post Office Park to the south. Elm Street continues east and west.
action: You go west
response: You are on the pavement outside the Nytemare Video Plaza, one of a chain of stores which has moved into Fairhaven recently. The window is full of movie posters, and a door leads in to the northwest. Beech Avenue runs off to the south, and Elm Street to the east of here.
action: You go to the northwest
response: You are inside the new Nytemare Video Plaza. The walls are lined with recent hit movies, mostly dark fantasy and thriller titles. The clerk is nowhere to be seen, but a small drop box, nearly hidden behind a life-size cardboard cutout of an action superhero, bears the words RETURN VIDEOS HERE. The door to the street opens to the southeast.

Before your eyes, the cardboard cutout comes alive, transforming into a strange creature! It seems to be part man, part machine, and all monster, wearing a black gangster suit and metallic sunglasses. A gleam of red comes from one eye, and instead of hands it has metallic claws, in which it holds an arsenal of lethal weapons and a strangely sparking video camera. A bright red glow surrounds it.

The watch beeps and displays: "VIDEO NASTY".

The Whito bottle gives a pulse of yellow light.

The Sword of Virtue tingles in your hands.

The Video Nasty brandishes its weapons fearsomely.
action: You examine nasty
response: It seems to be part man, part machine, and all monster, wearing a black gangster suit and metallic sunglasses. A gleam of red comes from one eye, and instead of hands it has metallic claws, in which it holds an arsenal of lethal weapons and a strangely sparking video camera. A bright red glow surrounds it.

"Go ahead," suggests the Video Nasty. "Make my day."
action: You attack nasty with Sword
response: You swing the shining yellow sword at the Video Nasty. The blade bounces wildly, as if deflected by a static force field. The creature ducks, and your blow goes wide.

The Video Nasty yawns and tosses a grenade at you. "Wanna play catch?"
action: You spray nasty with bottle
response: You spray some Whito onto the Video Nasty and it begins to spark! An invisible static force field generated by the video camera collapses, exploding in flashes of red lightning. Finally the effect dies down, leaving the Video Nasty still standing. With a VERY annoyed look in its eyes.
action: You attack nasty with Sword
response: You swing the shining yellow sword at the Video Nasty. The sword's blade strikes the creature in a shower of yellow sparks.

The Video Nasty gasps at you. "I'm hit! You hit me! Arrgghh! You'll never take me alive! I'll be back! See you in the re-runs, sucker!" Overacting wildly, it flips open an arm panel and pushes a secret button.

The Video Nasty fades away in a blaze of yellow light!

The watch beeps and displays: "NICE GOING".
action: You put Video in the slot
response: The video cassette slides into the slot, and you suddenly feel as if a great weight has been lifted from your shoulders. You hear a muffled clunk from the bottom of the box.
action: You go to the south-east
response: You are on the pavement outside the Nytemare Video Plaza, one of a chain of stores which has moved into Fairhaven recently. The window is full of movie posters, and a door leads in to the northwest. Beech Avenue runs off to the south, and Elm Street to the east of here.
action: You go to the west
response: You are inside the new Nytemare Video Plaza. The walls are lined with recent hit movies, mostly dark fantasy and thriller titles. The clerk is nowhere to be seen, but a small drop box, nearly hidden behind a life-size cardboard cutout of an action superhero, bears the words RETURN VIDEOS HERE. The door to the street opens to the southeast.
action: Go west
response: You are inside the Fairhaven library, which seems to be a refuge from another time. An electric chandelier hangs from Victorian rafters, lighting a wooden counter on which sits a computer terminal and card scanner. A stack of bookshelves is lost in deep shadow, while the main doorway opens east out to the street. The librarian sits behind his counter, reading.

The librarian looks up as you enter. "Welcome to the Hero Convention," he says. "I see you've had a harder time getting here than I thought. But perhaps it is just as well. This contest is not for the faint-hearted. Now, I'll need some proof of your exploits, to see if you are qualified to begin." He holds out his hand expectantly.
action: Spray fountain
response: (with the glowing spray bottle)
You spray some Whito onto the fountain but nothing much happens.

A few drops of rain splatter on the ground.
action: Go south
response: Post Office Tower, Floor 8
The Fairhaven Savings & Investment Bank has a much more sober and reserved atmosphere than the rest of the Post Office Tower. Expensively-dressed Assistant Branch Managers stride around making important decisions, and ignoring you. A cash-card machine on one wall offers instant withdrawals, and the sleek, ultra-modern lift opens to the north.

There is a very strange creature in the room. It seems to be nothing more than a hat, tie and business suit floating in midair; the thing has no face or hands, yet somehow manages to move and act like a person. A briefcase, stuffed full of papers, floats at one side. Despite its apparent lack of substance, the creature manages to make you feel insignificant. A bright red glow surrounds it.

The watch beeps and displays: "SERIOUS FRAUD".

The Sword of Virtue tingles in your hands.

The Serious Fraud solemnly stuffs a quantity of banknotes into its briefcase.
action: Attack Fraud with Sword
response: You swing the shining yellow sword at the Serious Fraud. The creature blocks the sword's motion with a wave of its wrist.

The Serious Fraud restrains a ghostly chuckle, and suggests that you return when you have enough experience to be more than a minor nuisance.

The Serious Fraud tries to arrest you for impersonating a human being.
action: You go to the south
response: Post Office Tower, Observation Deck
You are standing on the roof of the fifteen-storey Post Office Tower, with a breathtaking view of the entire town of Fairhaven. A guardrail on the edge is all that stands between you and the Post Office Park far below. High-altitude winds buffet you as you peer over. The lift doors (open) to the north are the only way down.
action: You examine Park
response: It's a long way down to the Post Office Park.
action: You examine the rail
response: It looks like an ordinary guardrail to me.
action: Go northeast
response: You are in a drab and rundown schoolyard, with pavement to the southwest. Featureless concrete walls block the way north, but a classroom opens to the east. A sign on the door reads "Room 13: S. Knight".

Lightning flashes on the horizon.
action: Go east
response: Fairhaven Public School, Room 13
You are in a school classroom. There is a large whiteboard on the east wall, and the door opens to the west. The teacher, Miss Knight, stands beside the whiteboard, struggling vainly to teach an unruly class.

The class appears to be in a manic frenzy.

There is a very strange creature in the room. It seems to have several heads, although the exact number is hard to determine since they are all moving and talking at once. The creature also has a large and disturbing quantity of tentacles, which are busily engaged in ripping shreds off every object in the room, and each other. A bright red glow surrounds it.

The watch beeps and displays: "BEDLAM".

The Sword of Virtue tingles in your hands.

The Bedlam punches itself in three eyes.
action: You examine Bedlam
response: It seems to have several heads, although the exact number is hard to determine since they are all moving and talking at once. The creature also has a large and disturbing quantity of tentacles, which are busily engaged in ripping shreds off every object in the room, and each other. A bright red glow surrounds it.

The Bedlam performs a brief hula dance.
action: You attack Bedlam with Sword
response: You swing the shining yellow sword at the Bedlam. The sword's blade strikes the creature in a shower of yellow sparks.

The Bedlam staggers away from you, and freezes.
action: You look at your surroundings
response: Fairhaven Public School, Room 13
You are in a school classroom. There is a large whiteboard on the east wall, and the door opens to the west. The teacher, Miss Knight, stands beside the whiteboard, staring at her suddenly silent class.

The class is sitting unnaturally still, as if frozen.

There is a Bedlam here.

The Bedlam sits very still, eyeing you cautiously.
action: You look at Bedlam
response: The creature seems to be stunned. A bright red glow surrounds it.

The Bedlam quietly rubs four of its heads with a tentacle.
action: You look at the whiteboard
response: It's covered with Miss Knight's teaching notes, written in barely visible green ink. The board shimmers with a pale green glow.

The Bedlam begins to stir again.
action: You read the board
response: It's covered with Miss Knight's teaching notes, written in barely visible green ink. The board shimmers with a pale green glow.

The Bedlam wakes up fully, and charges back into action.
action: Spray board
response: (with the glowing spray bottle)
You spray some Whito onto the whiteboard but nothing much happens.

The Bedlam gleefully shreds a desk.
action: You go southwest
response: You can only go out to the west.

The Bedlam gleefully shreds a desk.
action: You go west
response: You are in a drab and rundown schoolyard, with pavement to the southwest. Featureless concrete walls block the way north, but a classroom opens to the east. A sign on the door reads "Room 13: S. Knight".
action: Go west
response: You are standing outside the very new and extremely modern Post Office Tower, a shining monument to Fairhaven's progress, standing a full fifteen stories tall. You can enter the lobby to the north, or walk into the equally famous (though much older) Post Office Park to the south. Elm Street continues east and west.

You hear dogs howling in the distance.
action: You go south
response: Oak Street Garage, in workshop
You are in a small dirty workshop where the Oak Street Garage mechanics fix cars and sell motoring equipment. The workshop is empty at the moment except for one mechanic. There is a small door in the south wall marked "Wrecking Yard", and the workshop opens back onto Oak Street to the north.

You see an oil can here.

The mechanic tinkers with an engine.
action: You look at the can
response: It costs 4 dollars.
action: You examine the mechanic
response: The mechanic tests some spark plugs.
action: You get can
response: That would be shoplifting. You must buy the oil can first.
action: Go south
response: (Opening the workshop door)
Wrecking Yard
This vacant lot is presumably the Oak Street Garage wrecking yard. Strange pieces of metal which once were cars are scattered all over the weed-ridden ground in apparent chaos. One car body is newer, almost intact. The workshop door to the north is the only way back.

Sitting on the car body is a water valve.

There is a large, mean and hungry guard dog here.

The guard dog snarls at you.
action: You look at the valve
response: It looks like some important part of the town's water supply system.

The guard dog sniffs at you and bares its teeth.
action: You examine the dog
response: It's large, mean and very hungry.

The guard dog barks loudly.
action: You check your inventory
response: You have a shining yellow sword, a sparkling cape (being worn), a digital watch (being worn), a pair of 3D glasses (being worn), a ballpoint pen, and a glowing spray bottle.

The guard dog growls menacingly.
action: Examine watch
response: It's a Counsellor (R) brand digital watch, with standard time display but strangely no buttons. The watch shines with a soft yellow glow.
It says the time is 11:57 pm.

The guard dog patrols the area.
action: You look around
response: This vacant lot is presumably the Oak Street Garage wrecking yard. Strange pieces of metal which once were cars are scattered all over the weed-ridden ground in apparent chaos. One car body is newer, almost intact. The workshop door to the north is the only way back.

Sitting on the car body is a water valve.

There is a large, mean and hungry guard dog here.

The guard dog growls menacingly.
action: You get the valve
response: The dog charges, barking furiously, as you try to take the valve. You back away slowly and it calms down.

The guard dog snarls at you.
action: Attack dog
response: (with the shining yellow sword)
You swing the shining yellow sword at the guard dog. The sword's blade passes through the guard dog with no visible effect.

The guard dog sniffs at you and bares its teeth.
action: You go north
response: Oak Street Garage, in workshop
You are in a small dirty workshop where the Oak Street Garage mechanics fix cars and sell motoring equipment. The workshop is empty at the moment except for one mechanic. There is a small door in the south wall marked "Wrecking Yard", and the workshop opens back onto Oak Street to the north.

You see an oil can here.

The mechanic wipes his hands on a rag.
action: Go north
response: You are outside a small garage which sells petrol and services motor vehicles. The workshop opens to the south, and Oak Street continues east and west. To the north, Post Office Park is visible.
action: You go north
response: You are outside your formerly ordinary house, which is now a smouldering pile of rubble to the east. Clouds gather ominously in the sky overhead. Maple Drive leads north and south from here, and Post Office Park is to the west.

A cold shiver runs down your spine for a moment.
action: You go to the east
response: Charred bricks and cinders are all that remains of your formerly ordinary house. Your yard is to the west.

You see a raw steak and a cash card here.
action: You examine CARD
response: "Fairhaven Savings and Investment Bank
CASH CARD
J. Random Hero"
action: Go west
response: You are outside your formerly ordinary house, which is now a smouldering pile of rubble to the east. Clouds gather ominously in the sky overhead. Maple Drive leads north and south from here, and Post Office Park is to the west.

Dark clouds roll across the sky.
action: Go south
response: Oak Street Garage, in workshop
You are in a small dirty workshop where the Oak Street Garage mechanics fix cars and sell motoring equipment. The workshop is empty at the moment except for one mechanic. There is a small door in the south wall marked "Wrecking Yard", and the workshop opens back onto Oak Street to the north.

You see an oil can here.

The mechanic tests some spark plugs.
action: You go to the south
response: This vacant lot is presumably the Oak Street Garage wrecking yard. Strange pieces of metal which once were cars are scattered all over the weed-ridden ground in apparent chaos. One car body is newer, almost intact. The workshop door to the north is the only way back.

Sitting on the car body is a water valve.

There is a large, mean and hungry guard dog here.

The guard dog growls menacingly.
action: You give the steak to the dog
response: The dog snaps up the steak and walks away to devour it.

The guard dog whines contentedly.
action: You get the valve
response: Taken.

The guard dog chews on the steak.
action: You look at it
response: It looks like some important part of the town's water supply system.

The guard dog chews on the steak.
action: You examine valve
response: It looks like some important part of the town's water supply system.
action: Go north
response: You are outside a small garage which sells petrol and services motor vehicles. The workshop opens to the south, and Oak Street continues east and west. To the north, Post Office Park is visible.
action: You go north
response: You are walking in Post Office Park, a quaint old grassy field extending to the road in all directions. In the distance you can see the ruins of your house, a garage, some stores, the library and school, and of course the very new and modern Post Office Tower to the north. Before you, in the centre of the park, is a dingy old dribbling fountain.

A cold wind blows briefly.
action: You go south
response: Post Office Tower, Floor 8
The Fairhaven Savings & Investment Bank has a much more sober and reserved atmosphere than the rest of the Post Office Tower. Expensively-dressed Assistant Branch Managers stride around making important decisions, and ignoring you. A cash-card machine on one wall offers instant withdrawals, and the sleek, ultra-modern lift opens to the north.

There is a Serious Fraud here.

The Serious Fraud sells parking space on the Brooklyn Bridge to one of the bank managers.
action: You look at the machine
response: It's a very new and modern 'FastCash' machine, with ultra simple controls. There is a slot to insert a cash card, a screen to display instructions, and a single button marked 'Withdraw $10'. It doesn't even need a PIN number, since the Fairhaven Savings & Investment Bank is such a respectable organisation that there is absolutely no chance of fraud.

The Serious Fraud sells parking space on the Brooklyn Bridge to one of the bank managers.
action: You put the CARD in the machine
response: Done. The screen shows:

J. Random Hero
Warning - account is low.
Your account balance is $10.00.

Odd. Your account certainly wasn't that low last time you checked.

The Serious Fraud murmurs that the Mayor is taking bribes.
action: You withdraw
response: The machine beeps, and produces 10 dollars. Taken.
The screen shows:

J. Random Hero
WARNING! Account is EMPTY!
Your account balance is $0.00.

The Serious Fraud attempts to convince you that black is white.
action: You get CARD
response: Taken.

The Serious Fraud whispers that everything you have just heard, including this sentence, is false.
action: Go north
response: You are in the Post Office Tower's sleek, ultra-modern lift car.
Beside the doors to the south (currently open) is a sleek, futuristic keypad and display.
action: You buy can
response: The mechanic seems unable to see you.
action: You remove glasses
response: As you remove the glasses, you feel a faint sense of numbness. Everything somehow looks dull and flat.
action: You buy can
response: The mechanic thanks you, and sells you the oil can for 4 dollars. Taken.
action: Go west
response: You are on the pavement outside the Fairhaven General Store, one of the oldest shops still trading in the town. The store is open to the southwest. Beech Avenue runs off to the north, and Oak Street to the east.

A stranger bumps into you, and mutters something rude.
action: You go south
response: You are in the town's old General Store. The shelves hold only a small selection of items, but the charming old-world atmosphere more than makes up for the lack of variety. The shopkeeper stands behind her counter ready to serve you.

You see an electric torch and a newspaper here.

The shopkeeper counts the change in her cash register.
action: You buy the torch
response: The shopkeeper thanks you, and sells you the electric torch for 5 dollars. Taken.
action: You buy paper
response: The shopkeeper thanks you, and sells you the newspaper for 1 dollar. Taken.
action: You read the paper
response: Serious Fraud Suspected In Fairhaven Bank!

Rumours are spreading that the Fairhaven Savings and Investment Bank is under investigation for serious fraud. Many customers are complaining that their bank balances have mysteriously run into overdraft. Bank officials are hotly denying the rumours, blaming them on mass hysteria caused by the water shortage.

Bedlam in School!

Teachers from the Fairhaven Public School are complaining that shrinking budgets and lack of resources have turned classes into a nightmare. "I don't know what to say," said the teachers' spokesperson, Sally Knight. "I can't control my students, and it's getting worse. We need help desperately!"

'Hydrophobia' Grows As Water Shortage Worsens!

Fairhaven is heading into the third dry week of the longest-running water shortage in town history. The Council met today to decide urgent solutions to the problem which has their best experts baffled. "We have no idea what's happening," observed the Mayor. "All our pumping equipment seems to be breaking down for no reason. It's just plain bizarre."

The paper ends with a series of full-colour advertisements for the Nytemare Video Plaza.
action: You go east
response: You are outside a small garage which sells petrol and services motor vehicles. The workshop opens to the south, and Oak Street continues east and west. To the north, Post Office Park is visible.

A few drops of rain splatter on the ground.
action: Oil manhole
response: You pour some oil onto the rusty manhole and it frees up a little.
action: You wear the glasses
response: As you put the glasses over your eyes, you feel a faint tingling sensation down your spine. Everything somehow looks sharper than before.
action: Go down
response: You'll have to open the manhole first.
action: You open the manhole
response: Opened.

Lightning flashes on the horizon.
action: Go downwards
response: Ladder, under the manhole
You are on a cramped metal ladder extending down from the manhole to darkness far below. A little light filters in from above, but you would probably want to switch the torch on before descending any further.
action: You turn on the torch
response: You switch on the electric torch.
action: Look around
response: Ladder, under the manhole
You are on a cramped metal ladder extending down from the manhole to darkness far below. A little light filters in from above, but the electric torch in your hand is much more comforting.
action: Go downwards
response: You are at the base of a deep access shaft under Maple Drive and Oak Street. A cramped metal ladder leads up to a barely visible manhole far overhead, and a dark passage opens to the northwest.

You hear a quiet rumbling in the distance.
action: You go northwest
response: You are in a dark passage running northwest-southeast. Slimy mould grows on the walls around you.
action: You look at the mould
response: The mould isn't important.

Something drips onto your head.
action: You go to the northwest
response: You are a junction. A dark passage leads off to the southeast, while small dark tunnels run north and west.
action: Go west
response: You are in a small dark tunnel bending sharply from north to east. The walls are clammy to the touch.
action: Go north
response: You are in a wide open space with a hard concrete floor. Small dark tunnels lead south and east, and a metal door marked "Central Pump Room" (closed) leads down between them to the southeast.
action: Go east
response: You are in a small dark tunnel bending sharply from south to west. The walls are clammy to the touch.

You smell a dank, mouldy scent.
action: Go southeast
response: You are in a large concrete room which seems to house pumping equipment for Fairhaven's water supply. A mass of pipes, gauges and controls fills the room. One particularly large wheel is marked "Master Water Feed", and it is currently turned off. A nearby pipe is open to the air, and appears to be missing a valve. The pump room door (open) leads up to the northwest.

The Hydrophobia is here. It is a huge bloated balloon of a thing, covered in translucent black skin, with a puffy face and watery, bloodshot eyes which try to focus on you with some difficulty. The creature yawns and waddles drunkenly. It is much larger than it appeared on your first encounter, and seems to fill the entire pump room. A bright red glow surrounds it.

The Sword of Virtue tingles in your hands.

The Hydrophobia dribbles in your general direction.
action: Inventory
response: You have a shining yellow sword, a sparkling cape (being worn), a digital watch (being worn), a ballpoint pen, a glowing spray bottle, a water valve, a cash card, an oil can, an electric torch (providing light), a newspaper, and a pair of 3D glasses (being worn).

The Hydrophobia dribbles in your general direction.
action: You attack Hydrophobia with Sword
response: You swing the shining yellow sword at the Hydrophobia. The sword's blade strikes the creature in a shower of yellow sparks!

The Hydrophobia looks annoyed. "I oughta clobber you for that, 'Ero."
action: You attack Hydrophobia with Sword
response: You swing the shining yellow sword at the Hydrophobia. The sword's blade strikes the creature in a shower of yellow sparks.

"Now look wot you've done!" grumbles the Hydrophobia, shrinking. "You an' your flamin' 'Ero stuff. I'm gonna tell the boss everythin', and he ain't gonna like it, not one little bit. You'll see."

The Hydrophobia fades away in a blaze of yellow light!

The watch beeps and displays: "GOT 'EM".
action: You put the valve on the pipe
response: After some fiddling, you manage to fit the valve onto the pipe.
action: Look around
response: You are in a large concrete room which seems to house pumping equipment for Fairhaven's water supply. A mass of pipes, gauges and controls fills the room. One particularly large wheel is marked "Master Water Feed", and it is currently turned off. A nearby pipe now has its valve attached and appears to be in good working order. The pump room door (open) leads up to the northwest.
action: Turn wheel
response: You turn the wheel, and suddenly the room is filled with the sound of water flowing through pipes. Looks like you've solved the town's water shortage!
action: You go northwest
response: You are in a wide open space with a hard concrete floor. Small dark tunnels lead south and east, and a metal door marked "Central Pump Room" (open) leads down between them to the southeast.
action: You go to the east
response: You are in a small dark tunnel bending sharply from south to west. The walls are clammy to the touch.

A low squeaking echoes from the darkness.
action: You go to the south
response: You are a junction. A dark passage leads off to the southeast, while small dark tunnels run north and west.
action: Go west
response: You are in a small dark tunnel bending sharply from north to east. The walls are clammy to the touch.
action: Go north
response: You are in a wide open space with a hard concrete floor. Small dark tunnels lead south and east, and a metal door marked "Central Pump Room" (open) leads down between them to the southeast.

There is a faint hiss from overhead.
action: You go to the east
response: You are a junction. A dark passage leads off to the southeast, while small dark tunnels run north and west.

You smell a dank, mouldy scent.
action: You go to the southeast
response: You are in a dark passage running northwest-southeast. Slimy mould grows on the walls around you.
action: Go southeast
response: You are at the base of a deep access shaft under Maple Drive and Oak Street. A cramped metal ladder leads up to a barely visible manhole far overhead, and a dark passage opens to the northwest.
action: Go upwards
response: Ladder, under the manhole
You are on a cramped metal ladder extending down from the manhole to darkness far below. A little light filters in from above, but the electric torch in your hand is much more comforting.
action: Go upwards
response: You are on a quiet street corner in the little town of Fairhaven.
Maple Drive runs north from here to your house, while Oak Street runs west. A well-oiled manhole (open) is set squarely in the middle of the road.
action: You turn off the torch
response: You switch off the electric torch.

You hear dogs howling in the distance.
action: You go to the north
response: You are walking in Post Office Park, a quaint old grassy field extending to the road in all directions. In the distance you can see the ruins of your house, a garage, some stores, the library and school, and of course the very new and modern Post Office Tower to the north. Before you, in the centre of the park, is a clear bubbling fountain.
action: You examine the fountain
response: It's sparkling clear and bubbling, giving you a sense of wonder and innocence as you look at it. In the fountain you see a glowing green Magic Marker.
action: Go northeast
response: You are in a drab and rundown schoolyard, with pavement to the southwest. Featureless concrete walls block the way north, but a classroom opens to the east. A sign on the door reads "Room 13: S. Knight".

A cold shiver runs down your spine for a moment.
action: Go east
response: Fairhaven Public School, Room 13
You are in a school classroom. There is a large whiteboard on the east wall, and the door opens to the west. The teacher, Miss Knight, stands beside the whiteboard, struggling vainly to teach an unruly class.

The class appears to be in a manic frenzy.

There is a Bedlam here.

The Bedlam performs a brief hula dance.
action: Green
response: Miss Knight seems unable to see you.

The Bedlam performs a brief hula dance.
action: You examine green Marker
response: It's green. A message is engraved on the side:

If lost, return to:
Sally Knight
Room 13
Fairhaven Public School

The Magic Marker shines with a pale green glow.

The Bedlam takes a running jump at itself, and misses.
action: You examine the board
response: It's covered with Miss Knight's teaching notes, written in barely visible green ink. The board shimmers with a pale green glow.

The Bedlam gleefully shreds a desk.
action: You remove the glasses
response: As you remove the glasses, you feel a faint sense of numbness. Everything somehow looks dull and flat.

The Bedlam vanishes.
action: Look around
response: Fairhaven Public School, Room 13
You are in a school classroom. There is a large whiteboard on the east wall, and the door opens to the west. The teacher, Miss Knight, stands beside the whiteboard, struggling vainly to teach an unruly class.

The class appears to be in a manic frenzy.
action: You give Marker to Knight
response: Which marker do you mean, the yellow Magic Marker, or the green Magic Marker?
action: Green
response: At the sight of the green Magic Marker, the class suddenly bursts into complete mayhem, distracting the teacher's attention and forcing you away from her. They calm down a little when you retreat.
action: You wear the glasses
response: As you put the glasses over your eyes, you feel a faint tingling sensation down your spine. Everything somehow looks sharper than before.

The Bedlam appears before you.

The Bedlam performs a brief hula dance.
action: You attack Bedlam with Sword
response: You swing the shining yellow sword at the Bedlam. The sword's blade strikes the creature in a shower of yellow sparks.

The Bedlam staggers away from you, and freezes.
action: Look around
response: Fairhaven Public School, Room 13
You are in a school classroom. There is a large whiteboard on the east wall, and the door opens to the west. The teacher, Miss Knight, stands beside the whiteboard, staring at her suddenly silent class.

The class is sitting unnaturally still, as if frozen.
action: You give the green to Knight
response: Miss Knight takes the green Magic Marker with a sudden flash of recognition. "Thank you!" she exclaims. "I was wondering where that had got to." As she turns back to the whiteboard and begins writing on it, you almost think you see a green light fill the room for a moment. The class calms down noticably.

"Oh, before I forget," she adds, "I was told to give you this." She hands you a report card. Taken.

The watch beeps and displays: "NICE GOING".
action: You examine the CARD
response: Which card do you mean, the cash card, or the report card?
action: Report
response: J. Random Hero
Achievement Report

Video Nasty         x 1

Total monsters slain   = 3
action: You wear the glasses
response: As you put the glasses over your eyes, you feel a faint tingling sensation down your spine. Everything somehow looks sharper than before.
action: You go to the southwest
response: You can only go out to the west.
action: You go west
response: You are in a drab and rundown schoolyard, with pavement to the southwest. Featureless concrete walls block the way north, but a classroom opens to the east. A sign on the door reads "Room 13: S. Knight".
action: You go to the west
response: You are on the pavement outside the Nytemare Video Plaza, one of a chain of stores which has moved into Fairhaven recently. The window is full of movie posters, and a door leads in to the northwest. Beech Avenue runs off to the south, and Elm Street to the east of here.

Dark clouds roll across the sky.
action: You go to the west
response: You are inside the Fairhaven library, which seems to be a refuge from another time. An electric chandelier hangs from Victorian rafters, lighting a wooden counter on which sits a computer terminal and card scanner. A stack of bookshelves is lost in deep shadow, while the main doorway opens east out to the street. The librarian sits behind his counter, reading.

The librarian looks up expectantly as you approach, as if waiting for something.
action: You give the CARD to librarian
response: Which card do you mean, the cash card, or the report card?
action: Report
response: The librarian takes the card and examines it closely. "That's very impressive," he sighs, "but I'm afraid it's not quite good enough.
Come back when you've got some more experience." He hands the card back regretfully.
action: You go to the east
response: You are outside the Fairhaven Library, a worn-down old brick building with a faded billboard outside. A door leads in to the west. Beech Avenue continues north and south of here, and you can see Post Office Park to the east.

A cold wind blows briefly.
action: You go to the south
response: Post Office Tower, Floor 8
The Fairhaven Savings & Investment Bank has a much more sober and reserved atmosphere than the rest of the Post Office Tower. Expensively-dressed Assistant Branch Managers stride around making important decisions, and ignoring you. A cash-card machine on one wall offers instant withdrawals, and the sleek, ultra-modern lift opens to the north.

There is a Serious Fraud here.

The Serious Fraud murmurs that the Mayor is taking bribes.
action: Attack fraud
response: (with the shining yellow sword)
You swing the shining yellow sword at the Serious Fraud. The creature ducks, and your blow goes wide.

The Serious Fraud sues you for libel, slander, and wilful misguided heroism.
action: Attack fraud
response: (with the shining yellow sword)
You swing the shining yellow sword at the Serious Fraud. The creature ducks, and your blow goes wide.

The Serious Fraud hands you a High Court summons, dated yesterday.
action: Attack fraud
response: (with the shining yellow sword)
You swing the shining yellow sword at the Serious Fraud. The creature ducks, and your blow goes wide.

The Serious Fraud indignantly writes an angry letter to the Mayor.

Overcome by the force of the creature's logic, you stumble from the room.

The watch beeps and displays: "DONT QUIT".

You are in the Post Office Tower's sleek, ultra-modern lift car.
Beside the doors to the south (currently open) is a sleek, futuristic keypad and display.
action: You go south
response: Post Office Tower, Floor 8
The Fairhaven Savings & Investment Bank has a much more sober and reserved atmosphere than the rest of the Post Office Tower. Expensively-dressed Assistant Branch Managers stride around making important decisions, and ignoring you. A cash-card machine on one wall offers instant withdrawals, and the sleek, ultra-modern lift opens to the north.

There is a Serious Fraud here.

The Serious Fraud solemnly stuffs a quantity of banknotes into its briefcase.
action: Attack fraud
response: (with the shining yellow sword)
You swing the shining yellow sword at the Serious Fraud. The sword's blade strikes the creature in a shower of yellow sparks!

The Serious Fraud takes a cautious step backwards.
action: Attack fraud
response: (with the shining yellow sword)
You swing the shining yellow sword at the Serious Fraud. The sword's blade strikes the creature in a shower of yellow sparks!

The Serious Fraud anxiously checks its suit for rips.
action: Attack fraud
response: (with the shining yellow sword)
You swing the shining yellow sword at the Serious Fraud.

A cold wind suddenly whips through the room, unravelling the creature's clothing stitch by stitch. As the serious business suit falls into a heap on the floor, the air inside it begins to glow with an ominous red tinge. It moulds itself into a looming, shapeless black shadow which fills the entire room. Two blazing red eyes stare down at you.

"You think you can defeat ME?" screams the Serious Fraud's voice, somewhat hysterically. "You don't know NOTHING, Hero, do ya? I'm not going down alone. I got friends in high places, I got connections. You're dead, man! You're dead! You're..."

There is a sudden explosion from the lift shaft, and then silence. The shadow dissipates in a soft glow of yellow light which reluctantly fades.

The watch beeps and displays: "ONE DOWN".
action: You examine the report card
response: J. Random Hero
Achievement Report

Video Nasty         x 1
Fraud, Serious      x 1

Total monsters slain   = 4
action: You go south
response: As you step out of the lift car, there is an explosion from inside and the doors slam shut! You narrowly avoid being crushed!

Post Office Tower, Observation Deck
You are standing on the roof of the fifteen-storey Post Office Tower, with a breathtaking view of the entire town of Fairhaven. A guardrail on the edge is all that stands between you and the Post Office Park far below. High-altitude winds buffet you as you peer over. The lift doors (closed) to the north are the only way down.

Dark thunderclouds swirl menacingly overhead, and rain splatters loudly on the roof.
action: Go north
response: The lift doors are closed.

The storm seems to be growing more intense every second. Lightning arcs skywards all around you.
action: Wait
response: Time passes...

Huge gusts of wind and rain are making it difficult to walk upright. The roof seems to be sloping downwards toward the guardrail.
action: You examine the guardrail
response: It looks like an ordinary guardrail to me.

A sudden bolt of lightning smashes into the guardrail, burning a jagged hole in it. Hurricane winds hurl you off balance, pushing you closer to the edge. Hail and sleet beat down on your back.
action: You jump
response: Uh... is that a good idea? But before you can change your mind, a freak gust of wind catches you and sends you tumbling over the side of the roof...

You're falling in mid-air, high above the sleepy little town of Fairhaven. The air is clear, the view is stunning, and you feel light, boyant and suprisingly peaceful, given that you're about to be splattered on the pavement in a few seconds.

The suddenness of your descent takes your breath away.
action: Yell
response: Your throat is a bit sore now.

Your cape begins to billow out in the slipstream.
action: Wait
response: Time passes...

You seem to be falling less swiftly now.
action: You wait for a while
response: Time passes...

You drift gently down towards the Post Office Park.
action: You wait a while
response: Time passes...

Your cape puffs out like a parachute as you touch down in the middle of the Post Office Park. As soon as your feet are on the ground, it folds away again. Hmm, wonder what else this Cape of Many Things does?

You are walking in Post Office Park, a quaint old grassy field extending to the road in all directions. In the distance you can see the ruins of your house, a garage, some stores, the library and school, and of course the very new and modern Post Office Tower to the north. Before you, in the centre of the park, is a clear bubbling fountain.
action: You look at Cape
response: It's a cape made of some thin transparent material that feels strangely light yet tougher than steel. It sparkles with an iridescent yellow glow, and hugs your body like a glove, but your hands feel free and unencumbered. The cape seems to attract any objects you're holding, so they remain within easy reach at all times.

People scurry indoors for shelter.
action: You go west
response: You are outside the Fairhaven Library, a worn-down old brick building with a faded billboard outside. A door leads in to the west. Beech Avenue continues north and south of here, and you can see Post Office Park to the east.