Catventure
by Sleepy Macaw (2019)

You are a cat who purrrsues their dream of running away to Chipawgo.

action: %
response: You awaken from a Sunday afternoon slumber, lazily opening one eye and squinting at the sunlight streaming through the window. This wasn't the first time you dreamed of busy streets and tall buildings.

You're sick of this village. Nafurville is no place for a cat with ambitions. You belong in a place where great things can happen, where every street is laced with opportunity. Somewhere like Chipawgo.

Craning your neck, you give her a glare. She kept you captive
in this godforsaken place, when you could have been making big bucks and gracing the billboards of Chipawgo. But not for much longer...

It's time to get out of here.

The hut is quiet except for the soft snores of your owner.

You can see an entrance, a bed, a rocking chair (on which is an old lady), a collage of photos, an endtable (on which is a telephone), a litter box, a cupboard (closed), a bowl and a bookcase here.
action: About yourself
response: As good-looking as ever.
action: You look at the bed
response: Not much to say about it really. It's a bed.
action: You look at the chair
response: Your owner is sleeping on it.

On the rocking chair is an old lady.
action: You look at lady
response: Ugh. You don't even want to look at her right now. Better not wake her up or else she might try to stop you.
action: You look at the photos
response: A collage of photos of you and your owner are positioned on the wall in the shape of a heart. At the top is written "Mr. FluffyPotato" with hearts on either side. Sickening.
action: Examine endtable
response: On the endtable is a telephone.
action: You look at the telephone
response: It's a wireless landline telephone.
action: You examine the litter
response: That's where you do your business. Usually.
action: You open the cupboard
response: You open the cupboard, revealing some cans of Fancy Feast and a box of matches.
action: You take all
response: collage of photos: You hold the collage of photos in your mouth.
bowl: You are already carrying the collage of photos in your mouth. telephone: You are already carrying the collage of photos in your mouth.
cans of Fancy Feast: You are already carrying the collage of photos in your mouth.
box of matches: You are already carrying the collage of photos in your mouth.
action: You drop the photos
response: Dropped.
action: You look at the bowl
response: That's the bowl from which you eat your meals. Inside is some cat food.
action: You look at the bookcase
response: Dusty old books line the shelves, boasting titles such as Laser
Cats VII, Minced Meat Pies of Tomorrow, and
Mastering the Art of Karate in 5 Easy Steps.
action: You examine laser cats vii
response: Considered by many to be the best in the series.
action: You examine minced meat
response: It's a book about minced meat pies.
action: You examine karate
response: A detailed manual about the ancient art of karate. It is entitled "Mastering the Art of Karate in 5 Easy Steps".
action: You read the karate
response: You remove the book from the shelf and start reading.
Time passes as you dutifully hone your skills as guided by the text.

Congrats! You now are a master of karate! Now to put these skills to use...
action: Attack lady
response: You expertly perform a tornado kick, sending her flying across the room. Your owner is now dead.
You are a monster.
action: You read the minced meat
response: No thank you.
action: You read the laser cats
response: You've read it a hundred times already.
action: You leave
response: You'll have to say which compass direction to go in.
action: Look around
response: The hut is silent.

On the ground is an old lady.

You can also see a collage of photos, an entrance, a bed, a rocking chair, an endtable (on which is a telephone), a litter box, a cupboard (in which are some cans of Fancy Feast and a box of matches), a bowl and a bookcase here.
action: You look at lady
response: She lies motionless on the wooden floor of the hut.
action: You eat lady
response: She's plainly inedible.
action: You eat food
response: You nibble at the cat food, but soon lose interest. It's just so unappetizing when the bowl is only half full.
action: Go outside
response: It seems to be locked.

Guess you have to find some other way to open it.
action: You hit the door
response: You leap in the air and deliver a strong kick to the door, busting it open.
action: Go outside
response: That's already open.

The north side of the hut. To the west is the main village road. To the east is the river bank, on the other side of which lies the path to Chipawgo.

You can see a tree and a squirrel here.
action: You examine tree
response: Looks like oak.
action: You look at the squirrel
response: Looks delicious.
action: You eat the squirrel
response: You leap at the squirrel, but it is too fast and runs up the tree.
action: You climb the tree
response: You nimbly climb up to one of the branches. Only then do you realize that you have no idea how to climb down trees. You have no choice but to wait for someone to rescue you. Chipawgo will have to wait until another day.
action: Go south
response: The hut is silent.

On the ground is an old lady.

You can also see a collage of photos, a bed, a rocking chair, an endtable (on which is a telephone), a litter box, a cupboard (in which are some cans of Fancy Feast and a box of matches), a bowl and a bookcase here.
action: You get the matches
response: You hold the box of matches in your mouth.
action: Go outside
response: That's already open.

The north side of the hut. To the west is the main village road. To the east is the river bank, on the other side of which lies the path to Chipawgo.

You can see a tree (on which is a squirrel) here.
action: Go south
response: The hut is silent.

On the ground is an old lady.

You can also see a collage of photos, a bed, a rocking chair, an endtable (on which is a telephone), a litter box, a cupboard (in which are some cans of Fancy Feast), a bowl and a bookcase here.
action: You kick lady
response: She's already dead, you a**hole.
action: Light match
response: What do you want to light on fire? (i.e. "light something on fire").
action: Go east
response: The river is both wider and deeper than you would have hoped. Tall grass grows from the muddy soil.

You can see a water (in which is a turtle) here.
action: You look at the turtle
response: A large turtle with a nice big shell. He looks relatively friendly.
action: You talk to the turtle
response: You ask the turtle if he can get you across the river. The turtle says to bring him something fancy and he'll see what he can do.
action: You go west
response: The north side of the hut. To the west is the main village road. To the east is the river bank, on the other side of which lies the path to Chipawgo.

You can see a tree (on which is a squirrel) here.
action: You get fancy
response: You hold the cans of Fancy Feast in your mouth.
action: Go outside
response: That's already open.

The north side of the hut. To the west is the main village road. To the east is the river bank, on the other side of which lies the path to Chipawgo.

You can see a tree (on which is a squirrel) here.
action: You kick the turtle
response: You swipe at the turtle but miss. The turtle becomes enraged and bites off your paw. You collapse and bleed out until everything becomes dark.
action: You go to the south
response: The hut is silent.

On the ground is an old lady.

You can also see a box of matches, a collage of photos, a bed, a rocking chair, an endtable (on which is a telephone), a litter box, a cupboard (empty), a bowl and a bookcase here.
action: You get the tree
response: You are already carrying the box of matches in your mouth.
action: Go west
response: This is where the village people get together to do business. It's generally pathetic.
The street is deserted now. The hut and the river lie to the east.

You can see an Ice Cream Shop, a Clothing Store, a Saloon and a white cat here.
action: You examine the cat
response: You see a sleek white cat preening herself. She looks very pretty and she knows it.
action: You talk to the cat
response: The cat stops licking her pristine fur, looks you in the eye, and says

"I know what you've done, criminal."

She steps forward menacingly.

"I pity you. You can run from this place, but you can never escape your sins. Your soul will never be free." She pauses. "You know, it's a shame you did what you did, because I could have blown your mind."

You watch silently as she walks away. You feel a bit chilly.
action: You examine the ice cream
response: They sell ice cream, a frozen food, typically eaten as a snack or dessert, usually made from dairy products, such as milk and cream, and often combined with fruits or other ingredients and flavours.
action: You enter the ice cream
response: It's closed. No point to going inside if there's no ice cream.
action: You examine Clothing Store
response: Clothes for men, women, and children (but not cats). The store is clearly closed. You can see a dress, shoes, and a top hat through the display window.
action: You examine the hat
response: A fancy hat.
action: You kick the window
response: You give the window a mighty punch, leaving the glass shattered on the floor.
action: You take the hat
response: You hold the hat in your mouth.
action: Go east
response: The north side of the hut. To the west is the main village road. To the east is the river bank, on the other side of which lies the path to Chipawgo.

You can see a white cat, a box of matches and a tree (on which is a squirrel) here.
action: Go east
response: The river is both wider and deeper than you would have hoped. Tall grass grows from the muddy soil.

You can see a water (in which is a turtle) here.
action: You give the hat to the turtle
response: "Oooh, now that's fancy." The turtle accepts your gift and lets you slide the top hat onto his head.

"Now, hop on and I'll give you that ride you wanted."
action: You hop on turtle
response: You gingerly climb on the turtle's back. The turtle glides toward the other side of the river, careful not to dip below the surface of the water. As he swims, you look back toward the village that you are fleeing. Somewhere deep inside, you can feel a pang of guilt as you realize you will never see this place again. Gone are the days of safety and comfort, of careful love.

You shake your head to break your train of thought and determinedly face onward. This is about you and your dreams. Not her.

The turtle reaches the other side of the river and you hop off. Nafurville is already starting to look smaller. The land slopes steeply upward from the river, strewn with rocks of different shapes and sizes. The highway is further east.

You can see a turtle here.
action: You go east
response: Cars race down the concrete, each one creating a small wind in its wake. The way to Chipawgo is south, the same direction that the cars on your side of the street are headed. To the north you can see a farm in the distance.
action: You go to the south
response: Chipawgo is much too far away to reach on paw.
action: You go north
response: It's a boring old farm. No humans seem to be around. The highway to Chipawgo is to the south.

You can see a barn (in which is a horse) and cows here.
action: You examine the barn
response: In the barn is a horse.
action: You examine the horse
response: Looks like the strong, silent type.
action: You look at the cows
response: Moo.
action: You talk to the cows
response: You meow. They moo back.
action: You kick the horse
response: The horse is much bigger than you so you decide against it.
action: You ride the horse
response: You jump on the horse and grab hold of the reins. You gallop out of the farm and north alongside the highway toward Chipawgo, ignoring the stares of fellow travelers in their cars.

As you travel toward freedom, you feel a twinge of remorse for the terrible deed you have done. You wonder if it was worth it.

You decide to bury your memories of Nafurville somewhere deep down inside. That'll have to do.
action: You talk to the cat
response: The cat stops licking herself, looks you in the eye, and states,

The Lorenz system is a system of ordinary differential equations first studied by Edward Lorenz. It is notable for having chaotic solutions for certain parameter values and initial conditions. In particular, the Lorenz attractor is a set of chaotic solutions of the Lorenz system which, when plotted, resemble a butterfly or figure eight.

She then turns away to continue her grooming.
action: You talk to the cat
response: The cat stops licking herself, looks you in the eye, and states,

"A red herring is something that misleads or distracts from a relevant or important issue. It may be either a logical fallacy or a literary device that leads readers or audiences towards a false conclusion. A red herring might be intentionally used, such as in mystery fiction or as part of a rhetorical strategy, or it could be inadvertently used during argumentation."

She then turns away to continue her grooming.
action: You talk to the cat
response: The cat stops licking herself, looks you in the eye, and states,

"The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is a Christian restorationist church that is considered by its followers to be the restoration of the original church founded by Jesus Christ. The church is headquartered in Salt Lake City, Utah, and has established congregations and built temples worldwide. It has over 85,000 missionaries and a membership of over 15 million."

She then turns away to continue her grooming.
action: You talk to the cat
response: The cat stops licking herself, looks you in the eye, and states,

"The Qing dynasty was the last imperial dynasty of China, ruling from 1644 to 1912 with a brief, abortive restoration in 1917. It was preceded by the Ming dynasty and succeeded by the Republic of China. The Qing multi-cultural empire lasted almost three centuries and formed the territorial base for the modern Chinese state."

She then turns away to continue her grooming.
action: You talk to the cat
response: The cat stops licking herself, looks you in the eye, and states,

"League of Legends is a multiplayer online battle arena video game developed and published by Riot Games for Microsoft Windows and Mac OS X. It is a free-to-play game that is supported by micro-transactions and inspired by the mod Defense of the Ancients for the video game Warcraft III: The Frozen Throne."

She then turns away to continue her grooming.
action: You talk to cat
response: The cat stops licking herself, looks you in the eye, and states,

"A wallaby is a macropod found in Australia. They belong to the same taxonomic family as kangaroos and sometimes the same genus, but kangaroos are specifically categorised into the six largest species of the family. The term wallaby is an informal designation generally used for any macropod that is smaller than a kangaroo or wallaroo that has not been designated otherwise."

She then turns away to continue her grooming.
action: You talk to the cat
response: The cat stops licking herself, looks you in the eye, and states,

"The Schmidt Family Foundation is a private foundation created in 2006 by Eric Schmidt, the Executive Chairman of Google, and his wife Wendy Schmidt, to address issues pertaining to sustainability and the responsible use of natural resources."

She then turns away to continue her grooming.
action: You talk to the cat
response: The cat stops licking herself, looks you in the eye, and states,

"Spam is a brand of canned precooked meat products made by Hormel Foods Corporation. It was first introduced in 1937 and gained popularity worldwide after its use during World War II. By 2003, Spam was sold in 41 countries on six continents and trademarked in over 100 countries. In 2007, the seven billionth can of Spam was sold.
Spam's basic ingredients are pork shoulder meat, with ham meat added, salt, water, modified potato starch as a binder, sugar, and sodium nitrite as a preservative."

She then turns away to continue her grooming.
action: Lick cat
response: You lick the white cat.
action: You clean yourself
response: You rub yourself.
action: You lick yourself
response: You lick yourself.
action: Lick ice cream
response: You lick the Ice Cream Shop.
action: Lick clothing
response: You lick the Clothing Store.
action: You examine Saloon
response: It's a saloon, complete with swinging wooden doors. Like in those cowboy movies. You're not entirely sure what year it is.
action: You kick the cat
response: She's much too beautiful to attack.
action: You kick the window
response: You give the window a mighty punch, leaving the glass shattered on the floor.
action: You take the hat
response: You hold the hat in your mouth.
action: You examine the dress
response: A fancy dress.
action: You examine the window
response: You can see a sequin dress, black shoes, and a top hat through the display window.
action: You examine the shoes
response: Fancy shoes.
action: You drop the hat
response: Dropped.
action: You take the shoes
response: You hold shoes in your mouth.
action: You take the dress
response: You hold the dress in your mouth.
action: Go east
response: The north side of the hut. To the west is the main village road. To the east is the river bank, on the other side of which lies the path to Chipawgo.

You can see a tree and a squirrel here.
action: You go to the south
response: The hut is quiet except for the soft snores of your owner.

You can see a bed, a rocking chair (on which is an old lady), a collage of photos, an endtable (on which is a telephone), a litter box, a cupboard (closed), a bowl and a bookcase here.
action: Open Feast
response: You try using your claws and teeth to open the cans, but it's fruitless. You'll probably starve here.
action: Kick owner
response: You expertly perform a tornado kick, sending her flying across the room. Your owner is now dead.
You are a monster.
action: Lick owner
response: You lick the old lady.
action: Purr
response: You let out a soft purr.
action: Meow
response: You meow.
action: Lick fancy feast
response: You lick the cans of Fancy Feast.
action: You lick the minced Meat
response: You lick Minced Meat Pies of Tomorrow.
action: You take the dress
response: You hold the dress in your mouth.
action: Go outside
response: That's already open.

The north side of the hut. To the west is the main village road. To the east is the river bank, on the other side of which lies the path to Chipawgo.

You can see a tree and a squirrel here.
action: Go east
response: The river is both wider and deeper than you would have hoped. Tall grass grows from the muddy soil.

You can see a water (in which is a turtle) here.
action: You talk to the turtle
response: You ask the turtle if he can get you across the river. The turtle says to bring him something fancy and he'll see what he can do.
action: You give the dress to the turtle
response: The turtle looks at the dress with disinterest and says "Not my style."
action: You get the water
response: You hold the water in your mouth.
action: Lick turtle
response: You lick the turtle.
action: Look around
response: The river is both wider and deeper than you would have hoped. Tall grass grows from the muddy soil.

You can see a dress and a water (in which is a turtle) here.
action: You go west
response: The north side of the hut. To the west is the main village road. To the east is the river bank, on the other side of which lies the path to Chipawgo.

You can see a tree and a squirrel here.
action: You go west
response: This is where the village people get together to do business. It's generally pathetic.
The street is deserted now. The hut and the river lie to the east.

You can see shoes, a hat, an Ice Cream Shop, a Clothing Store, a Saloon and a white cat here.
action: You get hat
response: You hold the hat in your mouth.
action: You eat the grass
response: That's plainly inedible.
action: You rub grass
response: You rub the grass.
action: You go south
response: The hut is quiet except for the soft snores of your owner.

You can see a bed, a rocking chair (on which is an old lady), a collage of photos, an endtable (on which is a telephone), a litter box, a cupboard (in which are some cans of Fancy Feast and a box of matches), a bowl and a bookcase here.
action: You take the matches
response: You hold the box of matches in your mouth.
action: Light lady on fire
response: You strike the match and hold it to your owner's dress, watching the flames grow before your eyes. Before you know it, your owner is screaming and running outside, kicking the door open on her way out. You watch her flaming figure run toward the river.
action: You go to the east
response: The river is both wider and deeper than you would have hoped. Tall grass grows from the muddy soil.

You can see a hat, a dress and a water (in which is a turtle) here.
action: You go west
response: The north side of the hut. To the west is the main village road. To the east is the river bank, on the other side of which lies the path to Chipawgo.

You can see a tree and a squirrel here.
action: Go west
response: This is where the village people get together to do business. It's generally pathetic.
The street is deserted now. The hut and the river lie to the east.

You can see shoes, an Ice Cream Shop, a Clothing Store, a Saloon and a white cat here.
action: Go east
response: The north side of the hut. To the west is the main village road. To the east is the river bank, on the other side of which lies the path to Chipawgo.

You can see a white cat, a tree and a squirrel here.
action: You talk to the tree
response: Who do you want to talk to?
action: You talk to the cat
response: The cat refuses to talk to you and instead continues to groom herself.
action: You check your inventory
response: You are carrying:
a box of matches
action: You take the minced Meat
response: You hold Minced Meat Pies of Tomorrow in your mouth.
action: You hop on turtle
response: You gingerly climb on the turtle's back. The turtle glides toward the other side of the river, careful not to dip below the surface of the water. As he swims, you look back toward the village that you are fleeing. Somewhere deep inside, you can feel a pang of guilt as you realize you will never see this place again. Gone are the days of safety and comfort, of careful love. What will she do once she realizes you have left? Will she break down and cry? Will she get another cat?

You shake your head to break your train of thought and determinedly face onward. This is about you and your dreams. Not her.

The turtle reaches the other side of the river and you hop off. Nafurville is already starting to look smaller. The land slopes steeply upward from the river, strewn with rocks of different shapes and sizes. The highway is further east.

You can see a turtle here.
action: You go east
response: Cars race down the concrete, each one creating a small wind in its wake. The way to Chipawgo is south, the same direction that the cars on your side of the street are headed. To the north you can see a farm in the distance.
action: You go north
response: It's a boring old farm. No humans seem to be around. The highway to Chipawgo is to the south.

You can see a barn (in which is a horse) and cows here.
action: You give book to the cows
response: You can only do that to something animate.
action: Drop
response: (Minced Meat Pies of Tomorrow)
Dropped.
action: You get the cows
response: You hold cows in your mouth.
action: Inventory
response: You are carrying:
cows
action: Go south
response: Cars race down the concrete, each one creating a small wind in its wake. The way to Chipawgo is south, the same direction that the cars on your side of the street are headed. To the north you can see a farm in the distance.
action: You throw the cows at the cars
response: Futile.
action: Lick cows
response: You lick cows.
action: You go north
response: It's a boring old farm. No humans seem to be around. The highway to Chipawgo is to the south.

You can see Minced Meat Pies of Tomorrow and a barn (in which is a horse) here.
action: You ride the horse
response: You jump on the horse and grab hold of the reins. You gallop out of the farm and north alongside the highway toward Chipawgo, ignoring the stares of fellow travelers in their cars.

The sun sets and the sky above turns black. You gaze at the stars and dream of what they have in store for you. The taste of freedom is sweet.
action: You wake lady
response: That seems unnecessary.
action: You open the cupboard
response: That's already open.
action: You take the cans
response: You are already carrying the box of matches in your mouth.
action: Bite lady
response: You expertly perform a tornado kick, sending her flying across the room. Your owner is now dead.
You are a monster.
action: You show the cans to the cat
response: The white cat is unimpressed.
action: You give the cans to the cat
response: She scoffs. "No thank you. I only eat the Fanciest of Feasts".
action: You go south
response: The hut is quiet except for the soft snores of your owner.

You can see a box of matches, a bed, a rocking chair (on which is an old lady), a collage of photos, an endtable (on which is a telephone), a litter box, a cupboard (empty), a bowl and a bookcase here.
action: Pee
response: You go number one.
action: Poop
response: You eject a small poop.
action: You get the chair
response: That's fixed in place.
action: You take the phone
response: You hold the telephone in your mouth.
action: You call
response: You place the phone on the ground and clumsily strike the phone with your paws, pushing random buttons until it rings.

The number you have reached is not in service.
action: You look around
response: The hut is quiet except for the soft snores of your owner.

On the ground is a telephone.

You can also see some cans of Fancy Feast, a box of matches, a bed, a rocking chair (on which is an old lady), a collage of photos, an endtable, a litter box, a cupboard (empty), a bowl and a bookcase here.
action: You take the photos
response: You hold the collage of photos in your mouth.
action: You go to the south
response: The hut is quiet except for the soft snores of your owner.

On the ground is a telephone.

You can also see some cans of Fancy Feast, a box of matches, a bed, a rocking chair (on which is an old lady), an endtable, a litter box, a cupboard (empty), a bowl and a bookcase here.
action: You take the bowl
response: You hold the bowl in your mouth.
action: You show the bowl to the cat
response: (the white cat)
The white cat is unimpressed.
action: You give the bowl to the cat
response: (the white cat)
The white cat doesn't seem interested.
action: You go south
response: The hut is quiet except for the soft snores of your owner.

On the ground is a telephone.

You can also see a collage of photos, some cans of Fancy Feast, a box of matches, a bed, a rocking chair (on which is an old lady), an endtable, a litter box, a cupboard (empty) and a bookcase here.
action: You climb lady
response: You gently jump onto your owner's lap.
action: Sleep
response: You curl up and take a nap. The world can wait.
action: Pee
response: You go number one.
action: Go south
response: The hut is quiet except for the soft snores of your owner.

On the ground is a telephone.

You can also see a bowl, a collage of photos, some cans of Fancy Feast, a box of matches, a bed, a rocking chair (on which is an old lady), an endtable, a litter box, a cupboard (empty) and a bookcase here.
action: You take the laser
response: You hold Laser Cats VII in your mouth.
action: Go west
response: This is where the village people get together to do business. It's generally pathetic.
The street is deserted now. The hut and the river lie to the east.

You can see Laser Cats VII, shoes, an Ice Cream Shop, a Clothing Store, a Saloon and a white cat here.
action: Claw
response: What do you want to claw?
action: You go to the east
response: You must name something more substantial.