Turn Around
by Andrew Schultz (2012)
Genres: Abuses

A game that forces you off on tangents as you try to turn around. An experiment in parser, but hopefully not player, abuse.

action: You look at the box
response: It's about three feet wide by a foot tall, with four small cubical nooks labeled a/b/c/d. The words "Box of Tangents" are engraved over the four nooks, which currently show nothing--they're all empty.

On the left side there's a compass, which has not just eight but sixteen directions, currently flipping wildly around, and a small line of text below says PLEASE INSERT NUMBER IN APPROPRIATE NOOK.
action: You examine ghost
response: He's got the bedsheet and the inner peace thing going, just lying in wait for you to start a conversation.
action: You talk to the ghost
response: "I thought you'd never ask." You're not sure if he cared WHAT you asked about, or even if you were asking. "It wasn't all your fault I died, you know. But you contributed to it by BORING me with...well, I didn't have to bang my head until I...that's not important. Main thing, I've forgiven you, but I can't take the next step up--you know--until I help you understand. Understand why I wanted to read that logic book instead of talking to you. Oh, and they made me give you something. But it's nothing, really."

And it is. It's a big fat zero. Or, rather, a wooden cube mostly plain except for a big fat zero on one face.

"It'll help you get to some logic puzzles ahead. Don't worry--they're tricky, but not lethally boring. Ahem. Oh, apparently I also have to give you help if you get stuck too long...part of gaining my wings."

He disappears through the chalkboard to the north.
action: You look at the chalkboard
response: The scrawlings on the blackboard are disturbingly incoherent, but what's behind it may be worse.
action: About yourself
response: You're in your jogging outfit, a full grey sweatsuit.
action: You put zero in nook a.
response: Weird. A magnetic field's repelling it. Try another nook?
action: You look in the nook a.
response: This is a logic problem, not a treasure hunt. Examine what you need to, instead.
action: You look at the nook a.
response: Nook a is empty.
action: You put zero in the nook b.
response: The Big Fat Zero fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You examine the compass
response: It is currently pointing east.
action: Go east
response: The room's disappointingly bare for your average New Location. You can only go back west here.

That magic square hanging in the air must be your first puzzle. It's probably worth having a look.
action: You examine the square
response: "Maybe you've seen this before, maybe you haven't," says the ghost's voice. "Put the numbers one through nine so that all diagonals, rows and columns add up to the same number. If you're nice, I'll even tell you that nu...well, okay, it's gotta be one third of the sum of 'em all. Just say UL 3 or CR 6 or whichever to place a number. Or set it to zero to clear it. Or RESET for the whole board."

|
U 0  0  0 |  0
C 0  0  0 |  0
D 0  0  0 |  0
+
0  0  0    0
action: UL 8
response: You change the UL panel to 8.

|
U 8  0  0 |  8
C 0  0  0 |  0
D 0  0  0 |  0
+
8  0  0    8

The ghost kibitzes a bit: "Hm, putting a number in the center first could be useful. If you're careful, you might even see some don't work."
action: Uc 1
response: You change the UC panel to 1.

|
U 8  1  0 |  9
C 0  0  0 |  0
D 0  0  0 |  0
+
8  1  0    8

Your friend the ghost's voice breezes through again: "Hm, yes, the corners are a good idea, too."
action: Ur 6
response: You change the UR panel to 6.

|
U 8  1  6 | 15
C 0  0  0 |  0
D 0  0  0 |  0
+
8  1  6    8
The ghost, once more:
"Last thing I can tell you. Technically, if you have 3 numbers not in a line, you can deduce the others."
action: Lc 3
response: You change the CL panel to 3.

|
U 8  1  6 | 15
C 3  0  0 |  3
D 0  0  0 |  0
+
11  1  6    8
action: Cc 5
response: You change the CC panel to 5.

|
U 8  1  6 | 15
C 3  5  0 |  8
D 0  0  0 |  0
+
11  6  6   13
action: Rc 7
response: You change the CR panel to 7.

|
U 8  1  6 | 15
C 3  5  7 | 15
D 0  0  0 |  0
+
11  6 13   13
action: Ld 4
response: You change the DL panel to 4.

|
U 8  1  6 | 15
C 3  5  7 | 15
D 4  0  0 |  4
+
15  6 13   13
action: Dc 9
response: You change the DC panel to 9.

|
U 8  1  6 | 15
C 3  5  7 | 15
D 4  9  0 | 13
+
15 15 13   13
action: Dr 2
response: You change the DR panel to 2.

|
U 8  1  6 | 15
C 3  5  7 | 15
D 4  9  2 | 15
+
15 15 15   15

"Congratulations! You've figured one puzzle out. Have this Plain Old One, for completing your first puzzle--rather plain, but instructive."
action: You put one in a
response: (the Plain Old One in nook a)
Weird. A magnetic field's repelling it. Try another nook?
action: You put one in the C
response: (the Plain Old One in nook c)
Weird. A magnetic field's repelling it. Try another nook?
action: You put one in the d.
response: (the Plain Old One in nook d)
The Plain Old One fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You examine the compass
response: It is currently flipping wildly around.
action: Go northeast
response: Another side room, another dead end. You can go back southwest.

"Not bad. This one's a bit trickier, but it isn't. Only so many possibilities, but it's easy to "eliminate" the right one. You know how pawns in chess move? Forward, but capture diagonally? You'll need to make a queen here. Have a look at the board. Fail all you want. I've got time. Oh, just use algebraic notation--you know? a6 for a pawn to move ahead, a5-b6 to capture? Can't do anything snazzy like bc yet. Sorry."

You can see a chessboard here.
action: You look at the chessboard
response: You (white) have the pieces in lower case, and black's are in UPPER BOLD.
. . . . . . . . 8
b b b . . . . . 7
. . . . . . . . 6 B=black king W=white king
w w w . . . . . 5
. . . . . . . . 4
. . . B . . . . 3 b=black pawn w=white pawn
. . . . . . . . 2
. . . . W . . . 1
a b c d e f g h
action: B6
response: . . . . . . . . 8
b b b . . . . . 7
. w . . . . . . 6 B=black king W=white king
w . w . . . . . 5
. . . . . . . . 4
. . . B . . . . 3 b=black pawn w=white pawn
. . . . . . . . 2
. . . . W . . . 1
a b c d e f g h

He says, "I guess I have to take. Kings so far away, it shouldn't matter."

He moves his pawn from a7 to b6, taking one of your pawns.

. . . . . . . . 8
. b b . . . . . 7
. b . . . . . . 6 B=black king W=white king
w . w . . . . . 5
. . . . . . . . 4
. . . B . . . . 3 b=black pawn w=white pawn
. . . . . . . . 2
. . . . W . . . 1
a b c d e f g h

"So many moves. One may be right."
action: C6
response: . . . . . . . . 8
. b b . . . . . 7
. b w . . . . . 6 B=black king W=white king
w . . . . . . . 5
. . . . . . . . 4
. . . B . . . . 3 b=black pawn w=white pawn
. . . . . . . . 2
. . . . W . . . 1
a b c d e f g h

He smirks a bit. "Well, you're not being boring."

He moves his pawn from b7 to c6, taking one of your pawns.

. . . . . . . . 8
. . b . . . . . 7
. b b . . . . . 6 B=black king W=white king
w . . . . . . . 5
. . . . . . . . 4
. . . B . . . . 3 b=black pawn w=white pawn
. . . . . . . . 2
. . . . W . . . 1
a b c d e f g h

"Three to one. Better have something good."
action: A6
response: . . . . . . . . 8
. . b . . . . . 7
w b b . . . . . 6 B=black king W=white king
. . . . . . . . 5
. . . . . . . . 4
. . . B . . . . 3 b=black pawn w=white pawn
. . . . . . . . 2
. . . . W . . . 1
a b c d e f g h

"Very good."

He mutters something about your king blocking his king out, the queen mopping up the pawns... "You do know how to checkmate with a queen? Pin the king to g1/h1 and walk your king in? Good. Thought so. That's all detail work. Stuff that'd bore you."

As you start pointing at the board to figure what he says, the board folds up of its own accord and vanishes.

"Congratulations! You sacrificed to win this, so take this very valuable minus sign."
action: You look at the strip
response: It makes the zero look like a fridge magnet or something.
action: You put the minus in the a.
response: (nook a)
The standard-issue minus sign fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You put one in the b.
response: (the Plain Old One in nook b)
The Plain Old One fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You look at the box
response: It's about three feet wide by a foot tall, with four small cubical nooks labeled a/b/c/d. The words "Box of Tangents" are engraved over the four nooks, which currently show -1__.

On the left side there's a compass currently pointing northwest, and a small line of text below says NUMBERS AND OPERATORS PROPERLY POSITIONED.
action: Go northwest
response: Another dead-end room protruding from the Origin...the passage northwest ends shortly. Man, there aren't a lot of bendy passages here. Eh well, less puzzles that way.

You can see a panel of lights here.
action: You examine the panel
response: It's got a big reset button off to the side. You would assume that would turn all the lights in the 3x5 grid below off. You can push a panel simply by saying, for instance, 1-3.

+-+-+-+
| | | | 0
+-+-+-+
| | | | 1
+-+-+-+
| | | | 2
+-+-+-+
| | | | 3
+-+-+-+
| | | | 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: You say 0-0
response: (to yourself)
action: 0-0
response: After you touched tile 0-0, three changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
|*|*| | 0
+-+-+-+
|*| | | 1
+-+-+-+
| | | | 2
+-+-+-+
| | | | 3
+-+-+-+
| | | | 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)

"Wow! There are 32,768 total configuration--two to the fifteenth. Well, you can eliminate a few. And a bunch are mirror images and so forth."
action: 0-1
response: After you touched tile 0-1, four changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| |*| | 0
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 1
+-+-+-+
|*| | | 2
+-+-+-+
| | | | 3
+-+-+-+
| | | | 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 1-3
response: After you touched tile 1-3, five changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| |*| | 0
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*| | 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 3
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 1-2
response: After you touched tile 1-2, five changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| | | | 0
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 3
+-+-+-+
| | | | 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)

"In case you were wondering, there's no wrong top row--or bottom. That cuts it down to 4,096."
action: 0-0
response: After you touched tile 0-0, three changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
|*|*| | 0
+-+-+-+
|*|*| | 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 3
+-+-+-+
| | | | 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 2-0
response: After you touched tile 2-0, three changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 0
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 3
+-+-+-+
| | | | 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 0-4
response: After you touched tile 0-4, three changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 0
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*| | 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*| | 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 2-4
response: After you touched tile 2-4, three changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 0
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 3
+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)

"Fortunately there are really only three solutions...excluding mirror images."
action: 1-0
response: After you touched tile 1-0, four changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| |*| | 0
+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 3
+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 1-4
response: After you touched tile 1-4, four changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| |*| | 0
+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 3
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 0-3
response: After you touched tile 0-3, four changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| |*| | 0
+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 1
+-+-+-+
| |*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
| |*|*| 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*| | 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 2-3
response: After you touched tile 2-3, four changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| |*| | 0
+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 1
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 2
+-+-+-+
| | | | 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 1-1
response: After you touched tile 1-1, five changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| | | | 0
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 1
+-+-+-+
| | | | 2
+-+-+-+
| | | | 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 1-2
response: After you touched tile 1-2, five changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| | | | 0
+-+-+-+
| | | | 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 0-2
response: After you touched tile 0-2, four changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| | | | 0
+-+-+-+
|*| | | 1
+-+-+-+
| | |*| 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*| | 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 2-2
response: After you touched tile 2-2, four changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| | | | 0
+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 1
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)

"You can work out a solution one row at a time."
action: 0-1
response: After you touched tile 0-1, four changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
|*| | | 0
+-+-+-+
| |*|*| 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*| | 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 2-1
response: After you touched tile 2-1, four changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
|*| |*| 0
+-+-+-+
| | | | 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 1-0
response: After you touched tile 1-0, four changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
| |*| | 0
+-+-+-+
| |*| | 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 0-0
response: After you touched tile 0-0, three changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
|*| | | 0
+-+-+-+
|*|*| | 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)
action: 2-0
response: After you touched tile 2-0, three changed overall. Here's how the board looks now...

+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 0
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 1
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 2
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 3
+-+-+-+
|*|*|*| 4
+-+-+-+ (Note: * means a light is on.)

You solved it with 21 tries!

You hear the ghost's voice again.

"Very interesting. You went in for something asymmetric. It's actually the quickest way. Hm--do you know something?"

"But no matter which of the three ways you did this, they're all worthy. Now I present you with a choice--you can take this division sign and run. Or you can take the square root of two. It'll mean three more puzzles--but maybe you have the hang of it now."
action: You get the sqrt
response: The division sign vanishes in a puff of smoke. "Congratulations. You've just taken on three more puzzles, now. Oh, by the way, there's a new hint in room 315."

Well, you've made your choice--a brave one.
action: You look around
response: Another dead-end room protruding from the Origin...the passage northwest ends shortly.

You can see a panel of lights here.
action: You examine the panel
response: It's got a big reset button off to the side. You would assume that would turn all the lights in the 3x5 grid below off.

You admire your handiwork--you lit all the tiles! But maybe you should be moving on.
action: You go southeast
response: Another passage southwardsish, another dead-end room.

You can see a giant sheet of paper here.
action: You look at the paper
response: /|     /
/ |    /
/  |   /
/45 |  /
A----E-D

_
AE=1 BE=1 AB=BC=CD=AD=\/2

tan CAD = ?

There's also hard-to-read mumbo-jumbo about half-angle sines, tan 2x = 1 and cosine 4x = 1. Or, yeah, you can just throw stuff in the boggle-box until something works. One way's got to, eventually.
action: You go south
response: You're still a way from turning around yet.
action: Go west
response: You feel a pull to the northwest, then to the southeast--you can't really go west. And you probably don't need to, any more.
action: Inventory
response: You are carrying:
a Square Root of Two
a Big Fat Zero
action: You go to the south-west
response: You look over your shoulder for your friend the ghost, but he's nowhere around. You can go back northeast.

You can see a holographic chess diagram here.
action: You examine the chess
response: It's got a chain of white pawns, then a chain of black pawns.

. . . .
. b . .
bw. . .
.w. . .
w. . . .
. .B. .
. . . .
. .W. .

Text at the top says A5 WINS. But you knew that. You already solved a tougher puzzle.
action: You put sqrt in the a.
response: (nook a)
Weird. A magnetic field's repelling it. Try another nook?
action: You put the sqrt in the b.
response: The Square Root of Two fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You put the minus in the C
response: The standard-issue minus sign fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You put 1 in the d.
response: (nook d)
The Plain Old One fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You look at the compass
response: It is currently pointing easteastnorth. (NOTE: you can abbreviate this and other longer directions to EEN/ENE/NEN and I will know which way you want to go.)
action: Een
response: Room 22.5
"So the first three puzzles have been arithmetic, chess, and some true-false stuff. Let's make this about something a little more worldly, sort of--money. I'm pretty sure you like money. Not too much--or you wouldn't even have made it up here.

"So here's a cryptarithm to sort of help you remember, uhh, that stuff--each letter is a different number from zero to nine.
And the numerals on the left end can't start with zero.

"Oh, it'll also be in the other room you could've reached. The one WWN of the origin." He vanishes again.

You can see a guessboard here.
action: You examine the board
response: Well, it's two words adding to a third, apparently.

+more
=========
money
action: You examine foldout
response: It's a minus sign at the moment. It seems a bit broken. You're not sure what you can fold it into. There's some tiny etched writing on it.
action: You read the writing
response: You have to squint a bit to read it: "Just think of me F or FOLD if you want. I might mind if I were telepathic, but I'm not even animate."
action: Wws
response: Room 202.5
Fortunately, there's nothing tricky to going in a sixteenth-diagonal direction beyond the boggle-box bit. You see a hologram here, and you assume there's nothing tricky about going back east-east-north. Or north-north-east.
action: You examine hologram
response: It looks like more angles and numbers. A note written below says FOR YOUR EDIFICATION ONLY. THE TANGENTS ARE TOO COMPLEX. The upshot seems to be that you can figure the sin of 18 and 54, if you're crazy like that.
It's an isosceles triangle ABC (AB=AC) with BC=BD=DA, D on AB. For a visual representation, get a Glulx-compatible blorb reader. Like Gargoyle.
The hologram flickers briefly and appears to have changed.
action: You put 1 in the b.
response: The Plain Old One fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You put the sqrt in the d.
response: (nook d)
The Square Root of Two fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: WWN
response: Room 157.5
You shouldn't have much to do here other than go back easteastsouth. You solved the cryptarithm.
action: You get the minus
response: (the standard-issue minus sign)
It resists only slightly as you pull it away from the nook it was in.
action: You put the foldout on the minus
response: Which do you mean, the standard-issue minus sign or the foldout?
action: You examine the fold
response: It's a minus sign at the moment. It seems a bit broken. You're not sure what you can fold it into. There's some tiny etched writing on it.
action: You read the writing
response: You have to squint a bit to read it: "Just think of me F or FOLD if you want. I might mind if I were telepathic, but I'm not even animate."
action: You put foldout in the C
response: The foldout fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You put minus in C
response: (the standard-issue minus sign in nook c)
You take the foldout from nook c first.

The standard-issue minus sign fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You put the fold in the minus
response: (the foldout)
You can't put something inside itself.
action: You put the fold in the C
response: You take the standard-issue minus sign from nook c first.

The foldout fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: Inventory
response: You are carrying:
a foldout (currently a minus)
a standard-issue minus sign
a Big Fat Zero
action: You get the minus
response: Which do you mean, the foldout or the standard-issue minus sign?
action: You gethe standard-issue minus the sign
response: You already have that.
action: You put 1 in the C
response: Weird. A magnetic field's repelling it. Try another nook?
action: You put 0 in the d.
response: (nook d)
The Big Fat Zero fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: Nne
response: You don't feel you can really go far from the blackboard at the moment. Some weird sort of gravity.
action: You go to the west
response: "Don't worry. This isn't a puzzle. It's a bit of showing off, really. In fact, all of the rooms to the south that'll open up? They're showing off, too. Hope you don't mind. I...uh...well, they'd be trickier if I'd gotten around to learning assembly language. No, no, that's not your fault--I put it off for years!"

A pair of 5x5 squares is here.
action: You look at squares
response: Someone's drawn up a bunch of numbers:

23401 13024
40123 24130
12340 30241
34012 41302

5A + B + 1 = 5x5 magic square.

Hm. Some wise guy showing off. And you still stuck on that three by three deal back east.
action: You put 1 in the b.
response: The Plain Old One fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: Ees
response: Room 337.5
action: Sse
response: You can only go back easteastsouth--or you can just type BACK.
action: You put foldout in the C
response: The foldout fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You put the minus in the a.
response: (the foldout in nook a)
(first taking the foldout)

The foldout fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You look at the box
response: It's about three feet wide by a foot tall, with four small cubical nooks labeled a/b/c/d. The words "Box of Tangents" are engraved over the four nooks, which currently show -1_sqrt(2).

On the left side there's a compass currently flipping wildly around, and a small line of text below says MOVE OPERATOR OR REMOVE NUMBER.
action: Nnw
response: Room 112.5
Hm. Another checkerboard. But it's a bit smaller. You hear your friend again. "Well...that 8x8 board was kind of tricky. So I gave you a 6x6-er instead. It's sort of more complex and less complex at the same time."

You can see a 6x6 board here.
action: You look at the board
response: "Here's one that shouldn't be too hard. I think. Six queens, six by six square. It's impossible for four-by-four and a bit too easy for five-by-five. Above that, you need a computer. Just say the square you want to remove a piece from or place it on. Remember, queens move vertically, horizontally and diagonally."

+-+-+-+-+-+-+
1| | | | | | |1
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
2| | | | | | |2 Q=queen *=illegal square
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
3| | | | | | |3
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
4| | | | | | |4
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
5| | | | | | |5
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
6| | | | | | |6
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
a b c d e f
action: C1
response: You decide to place a queen on c1.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+
1|x|x|Q|x|x|x|1
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
2| |x|x|x| | |2 Q=queen *=illegal square
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
3|x| |x| |x| |3
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
4| | |x| | |x|4
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
5| | |x| | | |5
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
6| | |x| | | |6
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
a b c d e f
action: C1
response: You clear a queen from c1.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+
1| | | | | | |1
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
2| | | | | | |2 Q=queen *=illegal square
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
3| | | | | | |3
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
4| | | | | | |4
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
5| | | | | | |5
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
6| | | | | | |6
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
a b c d e f
action: B1
response: You decide to place a queen on b1.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+
1|x|Q|x|x|x|x|1
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
2|x|x|x| | | |2 Q=queen *=illegal square
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
3| |x| |x| | |3
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
4| |x| | |x| |4
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
5| |x| | | |x|5
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
6| |x| | | | |6
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
a b c d e f
action: D2
response: You decide to place a queen on d2.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+
1|x|Q|x|x|x|x|1
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
2|x|x|x|Q|x|x|2 Q=queen *=illegal square
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
3| |x|x|x|x| |3
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
4| |x| |x|x|x|4
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
5|x|x| |x| |x|5
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
6| |x| |x| | |6
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
a b c d e f
action: F3
response: You decide to place a queen on f3.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+
1|x|Q|x|x|x|x|1
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
2|x|x|x|Q|x|x|2 Q=queen *=illegal square
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
3|x|x|x|x|x|Q|3
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
4| |x| |x|x|x|4
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
5|x|x| |x| |x|5
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
6| |x|x|x| |x|6
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
a b c d e f
action: A4
response: You decide to place a queen on a4.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+
1|x|Q|x|x|x|x|1
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
2|x|x|x|Q|x|x|2 Q=queen *=illegal square
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
3|x|x|x|x|x|Q|3
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
4|Q|x|x|x|x|x|4
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
5|x|x| |x| |x|5
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
6|x|x|x|x| |x|6
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
a b c d e f
action: C5
response: You decide to place a queen on c5.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+
1|x|Q|x|x|x|x|1
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
2|x|x|x|Q|x|x|2 Q=queen *=illegal square
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
3|x|x|x|x|x|Q|3
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
4|Q|x|x|x|x|x|4
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
5|x|x|Q|x|x|x|5
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
6|x|x|x|x| |x|6
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
a b c d e f
action: E6
response: You decide to place a queen on e6.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+
1|x|Q|x|x|x|x|1
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
2|x|x|x|Q|x|x|2 Q=queen *=illegal square
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
3|x|x|x|x|x|Q|3
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
4|Q|x|x|x|x|x|4
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
5|x|x|Q|x|x|x|5
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
6|x|x|x|x|Q|x|6
+-+-+-+-+-+-+
a b c d e f

You hear a "poof" from back at the origin. You see smoke coming from the boggle-box. It's probably for effect, but who knows...
action: Sse
response: You run to check the boggle box, but it looks unharmed. The foldout appears to be slightly off-key, though. It wobbles into the shape of a spiffy, perpendicular X before tumbling out of the boggle-box.
action: You press the space
response: Wait--it's a plus, because when it fell, it landed on one of the legs. You pick it up gingerly, half worried it might combust or gain a few thousand degrees Fahrenheit. You fiddle with it to make sure you can switch it back to a minus sign if you need to.

You're in some sort of weird outdoor classroom. It's got a huge chalkboard to the north. There are paths in all the other standard cardinal directions, but it seems a lot just won't let you. You don't entirely understand the logic of this place, yet.

That boggle box is here. Where will you need to make it take you next?
action: You get the minus
response: (the standard-issue minus sign)
It resists only slightly as you pull it away from the nook it was in.
action: You examine the foldout
response: It's a minus sign at the moment. You can also fold it into a plus sign. Just type MINUS or PLUS.
action: Plus
response: You fold up a plus sign.
action: Nne
response: Room 67.5
You walk into what appears to be a city block. It has a limousine by a nightclub, with a hotel a bit away. Six women are here--they're yacking about you're not sure what. You find them less attractive, and their babble less interesting, than you would have an hour ago.

"Ohmigod!" yells one. "You must be the limo driver! You totally have to take us back to the hotel! But you like can't schlep us all in at once. We like have standards though. Are you like listening?"
action: No
response: She babbles on. "We can't let you in the limo with just one of us because we've had a driver put the moves on us and we can't let you just drive it around empty because that would like be wasting money and I like almost forgot something really important. We're like BFFs but some of us are really upset with each other right now so we like need to cool down until we're all like safe."

After some interrogation, you determine their names, and also that Danni hates Cindy hates Buffy hates Abbie hates Fanny hates Ellie, and vice versa.

"Well there you have it," whispers the ghost. "A bunch of ladies you might have tried to put the moves on, or been jealous if a friend did..."
action: You get in the limo
response: She's too drunk to follow complex orders--or appreciate you spelling out trivial ones. Just call the name of whomever you wish to enter or exit the limo.
action: Abbie
response: Abbie steps in while cracking some gum.

HOTEL: nobody.
LIMO: Abbie.
CLUB (with you): Fanny, Ellie, Danni, Cindy and Buffy.
action: Cindy
response: Cindy steps in without losing track of her cell phone conversation.

HOTEL: nobody.
LIMO: Cindy and Abbie.
CLUB (with you): Fanny, Ellie, Danni and Buffy.
action: Ellie
response: Ellie steps in with a curt Whatever.

HOTEL: nobody.
LIMO: Ellie, Cindy and Abbie.
CLUB (with you): Fanny, Danni and Buffy.
action: You get in LIMO
response: You drive off. Traffic appears out of nowhere. After a tense minute of driving through neon jungles that weren't there and will probably vanish when you step outside, you arrive at the hotel.

HOTEL (with you): nobody.
LIMO: Ellie, Cindy and Abbie.
CLUB: Fanny, Danni and Buffy.
action: Ellie
response: Ellie steps out with an exasperated sigh.
HOTEL (with you): Ellie.
LIMO: Cindy and Abbie.
CLUB: Fanny, Danni and Buffy.
action: Cindy
response: Cindy steps out without losing track of her cell phone conversation. HOTEL (with you): Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Abbie.
CLUB: Fanny, Danni and Buffy.
action: Abbie
response: Abbie steps out with an exasperated sigh.
HOTEL (with you): Abbie, Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: nobody.
CLUB: Fanny, Danni and Buffy.
action: You drive
response: (the limousine)
"Oh my god, you are so totally not taking off like that!" exclaims Ellie.
action: Cindy
response: Cindy steps in while twirling her hair.

HOTEL (with you): Abbie and Ellie.
LIMO: Cindy.
CLUB: Fanny, Danni and Buffy.
action: Ellie
response: Ellie steps in with an exasperated sigh.

HOTEL (with you): Abbie.
LIMO: Ellie and Cindy.
CLUB: Fanny, Danni and Buffy.
action: You get in LIMO
response: You drive off. Traffic appears out of nowhere. After a tense minute of driving through neon jungles that will once again vanish when you step outside, you arrive at the club.

HOTEL: Abbie.
LIMO: Ellie and Cindy.
CLUB (with you): Fanny, Danni and Buffy.
action: Ellie
response: Ellie steps out with a curt Whatever.
HOTEL: Abbie.
LIMO: Cindy.
CLUB (with you): Ellie, Fanny, Danni and Buffy.
action: Cindy
response: Cindy steps out complaining how only creeps ever try to help her through narrow doors in her high heels.
HOTEL: Abbie.
LIMO: nobody.
CLUB (with you): Cindy, Ellie, Fanny, Danni and Buffy.
action: Fanny
response: Fanny steps in with an exasperated sigh.

HOTEL: Abbie.
LIMO: Fanny.
CLUB (with you): Cindy, Ellie, Danni and Buffy.
action: Danni
response: Danni steps in with a curt Whatever.

HOTEL: Abbie.
LIMO: Danni and Fanny.
CLUB (with you): Cindy, Ellie and Buffy.
action: Buffy
response: Buffy steps in complaining how only creeps ever try to help her through narrow doors in her high heels.

HOTEL: Abbie.
LIMO: Buffy, Danni and Fanny.
CLUB (with you): Cindy and Ellie.
action: You get in
response: You drive off. Traffic appears out of nowhere. After a tense minute of driving through neon jungles that will once again vanish when you step outside, you arrive at the hotel.

HOTEL (with you): Abbie.
LIMO: Buffy, Danni and Fanny.
CLUB: Cindy and Ellie.
action: Danni
response: Danni steps out without losing track of her cell phone conversation. HOTEL (with you): Danni and Abbie.
LIMO: Buffy and Fanny.
CLUB: Cindy and Ellie.
action: You get in
response: You drive off. Traffic appears out of nowhere. After a tense minute of driving through neon jungles that will once again vanish when you step outside, you arrive at the club.

HOTEL: Danni and Abbie.
LIMO: Buffy and Fanny.
CLUB (with you): Cindy and Ellie.
action: Cindy
response: Cindy steps in with a curt Whatever.

HOTEL: Danni and Abbie.
LIMO: Cindy, Buffy and Fanny.
CLUB (with you): Ellie.
action: You get in
response: Buffy is getting bored of riding in the limousine.
action: Buffy
response: Buffy steps out with an exasperated sigh.
HOTEL: Danni and Abbie.
LIMO: Cindy and Fanny.
CLUB (with you): Buffy and Ellie.
action: Ellie
response: Ellie steps in complaining how only creeps ever try to help her through narrow doors in her high heels.

HOTEL: Danni and Abbie.
LIMO: Ellie, Cindy and Fanny.
CLUB (with you): Buffy.
action: Fanny
response: Fanny steps out with an exasperated sigh.
HOTEL: Danni and Abbie.
LIMO: Ellie and Cindy.
CLUB (with you): Fanny and Buffy.
action: You get in
response: You drive off. Traffic appears out of nowhere. After a tense minute of driving through neon jungles that will once again vanish when you step outside, you arrive at the hotel.

HOTEL (with you): Danni and Abbie.
LIMO: Ellie and Cindy.
CLUB: Fanny and Buffy.
action: Ellie
response: Ellie steps out while twirling her hair.
HOTEL (with you): Ellie, Danni and Abbie.
LIMO: Cindy.
CLUB: Fanny and Buffy.
action: Abbie
response: Abbie steps in with a curt Whatever.

HOTEL (with you): Ellie and Danni.
LIMO: Abbie and Cindy.
CLUB: Fanny and Buffy.
action: Cindy
response: Cindy steps out with an exasperated sigh.
HOTEL (with you): Cindy, Ellie and Danni.
LIMO: Abbie.
CLUB: Fanny and Buffy.
action: Danni
response: Danni steps in while cracking some gum.

HOTEL (with you): Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Danni and Abbie.
CLUB: Fanny and Buffy.
action: You get in
response: You drive off. Traffic appears out of nowhere. After a tense minute of driving through neon jungles that will once again vanish when you step outside, you arrive at the club.

HOTEL: Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Danni and Abbie.
CLUB (with you): Fanny and Buffy.
action: Fanny
response: Fanny steps in with an exasperated sigh.

HOTEL: Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Fanny, Danni and Abbie.
CLUB (with you): Buffy.
action: Fanny
response: Fanny steps out with a curt Whatever.
HOTEL: Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Danni and Abbie.
CLUB (with you): Fanny and Buffy.
action: Buffy
response: Buffy steps in with an exasperated sigh.

HOTEL: Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Buffy, Danni and Abbie.
CLUB (with you): Fanny.
action: Abbie
response: Abbie steps out without losing track of her cell phone conversation. HOTEL: Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Buffy and Danni.
CLUB (with you): Abbie and Fanny.
action: Fanny
response: Fanny steps in while twirling her hair.

HOTEL: Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Fanny, Buffy and Danni.
CLUB (with you): Abbie.
action: You get in
response: You drive off. Traffic appears out of nowhere. After a tense minute of driving through neon jungles that will once again vanish when you step outside, you arrive at the hotel.

HOTEL (with you): Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Fanny, Buffy and Danni.
CLUB: Abbie.
action: Fanny
response: Fanny steps out while cracking some gum.
HOTEL (with you): Fanny, Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Buffy and Danni.
CLUB: Abbie.
action: Buffy
response: Buffy steps out with an exasperated sigh.
HOTEL (with you): Buffy, Fanny, Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: Danni.
CLUB: Abbie.
action: Danni
response: Danni steps out while cracking some gum.
HOTEL (with you): Danni, Buffy, Fanny, Cindy and Ellie.
LIMO: nobody.
CLUB: Abbie.
action: Cindy
response: Cindy steps in complaining how only creeps ever try to help her through narrow doors in her high heels.

HOTEL (with you): Danni, Buffy, Fanny and Ellie.
LIMO: Cindy.
CLUB: Abbie.
action: Ellie
response: Ellie steps in with a curt Whatever.

HOTEL (with you): Danni, Buffy and Fanny.
LIMO: Ellie and Cindy.
CLUB: Abbie.
action: You get in
response: You drive off. Traffic appears out of nowhere. After a tense minute of driving through neon jungles that will once again vanish when you step outside, you arrive at the club.

HOTEL: Danni, Buffy and Fanny.
LIMO: Ellie and Cindy.
CLUB (with you): Abbie.

You think you hear the ghost trying to give you help, but he's drowned out by the girls' yacking. Which isn't going to stop any time soon. Bummer.
action: Abbie
response: Abbie steps in with an exasperated sigh.

HOTEL: Danni, Buffy and Fanny.
LIMO: Abbie, Ellie and Cindy.
CLUB (with you): nobody.
action: You get in
response: You drive off. Traffic appears out of nowhere. After a tense minute of driving through neon jungles that will once again vanish when you step outside, you arrive at the hotel.

You blink, then double check--yup, everyone's back at the hotel!

They actually give you a decent tip, but as you leave, you hear them saying "Oh my god. Who did he think he was? Referring to us by name? I mean, we told him our names to introduce ourselves but he totally abused it." As they walk away you hear them discuss whether being brainy enough to solve a puzzle like this made you that dorky looking, or whether being dorky looking forced you to be brainy. You almost get interested, yourself.

You hear a click-foom from the southsouthwest, with trailing falling-firework sounds. You suspect your handy foldout has changed again.
action: Ssw
response: You're in some sort of weird outdoor classroom. It's got a huge chalkboard to the north. There are paths in all the other standard cardinal directions, but it seems a lot just won't let you. You don't entirely understand the logic of this place, yet.

That boggle box is here. Where will you need to make it take you next?
action: You look at the foldout
response: It's a plus which you can switch into a minus. In fact, you can fold it into two other forms--a minus or a division sign. Just type DIVISION, MINUS OR PLUS.
action: Examine box
response: It's about three feet wide by a foot tall, with four small cubical nooks labeled a/b/c/d. The words "Box of Tangents" are engraved over the four nooks, which currently show _1+sqrt(2).

On the left side there's a compass currently pointing northnortheast, and a small line of text below says NUMBERS AND OPERATORS PROPERLY POSITIONED.
action: Division
response: You fold the foldout into the division sign.
action: Examine box
response: It's about three feet wide by a foot tall, with four small cubical nooks labeled a/b/c/d. The words "Box of Tangents" are engraved over the four nooks, which currently show __/_.

On the left side there's a compass currently flipping wildly around, and a small line of text below says PLEASE ADD NUMBER AFTER OPERATOR.
action: You put 1 in the b.
response: The Plain Old One fits in with a magnetic snap.
action: You go north
response: You won't be able to follow the ghost that way. Well, not for another forty plus years. You hope.
action: You go south
response: Well, it's not really behind you, but more like behind where you were.

You have solved 6 of 6 quirky puzzles. Congratulations! You made it! The weirdness fades and you step out into an alley to continue your jog. The usual pseudo-Narnian time constraints and all mean you weren't really gone, even if some of the puzzles took a while.

You're out of the whole mess, and you find yourself thinking of the problems and variations on them. At first you didn't want to think THAT guy--dumb enough to bash his head theatrically--could know something you'd have fun learning. Maybe if you could it, you could get a little further ahead in the world...or (and you don't know WHERE this thought came from) maybe it might be fun to learn on its own.

* * YOU TURNED AROUND * *

Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, QUIT or UNDO the last command?

> HELP