Anchor: Well, since you outlawed the obvious gun jokes, it must be his double-barreled penis.
Entailed: Seeing as we covered the easy ones, I'll need to be more creative. 
Contradiction: It must have been his old dusty cowboy hat.
Contradiction: Finn doesn't exist at all.
Contradiction: Kmart had cheap infant wear, in which I was able to get 4 outfits.
Contradiction: The Turks' indian empire was saved and the Afghan horse-breeders were defeated.
Contradiction: A fireman sprays under the hood of a car on a jack stand.