Product: Constantine [Blu-ray] (2012)
Rating: 5.0
An inspirational roller coaster ride!
I left this movie with tears in my eyes and love in my heart. The triumphant seven time Oscar winning genius Keanu Reeves plays Constantine, a rebel who fights stuff. He is a rebel who cares. For me. I now know that Heaven and Hell are real. Thanks Keanu for making me a believer! I almost can't wait to die. Almost, because than I couldn't watch anymore of your masterpieces. The 3D eye popping special effects really put me in he movie. I thought Satan was right next to me. Now he won't leave me alone. Constantine help me. Also, this movie is Bursting with super talent. This one girl says some really cool lines. Oh, and I can't forget that guy and oh man, he did the Coolest thing about half way through the movie. Keanu Reeves is, if I may say so, "heaven" sent. Get it? The movie talks about heaven, and I just made a funny pun refrencing heaven. Clever right? I don't want to give anything away, but they all die. Twice. But, K. Rock is soo super that he keeps coming back to life with more talent each time. My favorite scence is where Keanu and his best fried Ted go into Hell and play board games with the Grim Reaper. Then, he goes back in time and picks up some wacky dudes and shenanagins insue. My second favorite part is where Conatantine is up on the roof and a bad guy tries to shoot him, but since he's Keanu Reeves, he dodges all of the bullets. Then,he gets in a helicopter and saves his friend, the guy in Apocolyspe Now. Redux. Then, Constantine goes into the ghetto and teaches Satan's minions how to play baseball. But not just any kind of baseball, no this is Hardball. After all that, he takes a nap. When he wakes up, he puts on his comedic game face and plays a wacky game of football. This is my least favorite part of the movie. Then, he dies. Last year, Keanu took home the Oscar for Best Person in general for the third year in a row. Oh! I just remembered my other favorite scene! So, Contsantine is riding a bus to go to work, to find some bad guys and stuff, and all of a sudden Miss Congeniality pops on the bus and starts to drive really slow. Constantine makes her do some "radical" jumps. The bus gets some mad crazy air. His best friend, Jim Carey's best friend too, helps him out there somewhere, but Keanu Reeves doesn't need a partner. He's a rebel. He works alone. For me. After the coolest music video, Constantine warns us of the dangers of drinking and driving. Proving once again, that he a deep, thoughtfull human being. He's doing it for the kids, not the money or fame. After watching Constantine, I imeditally went to church and enlisted to fight Satan, but they didn't give me a Constantine weapon. I feel that Constantine was a wonderful sequel to The Passion of the Christ. Not many people know this, but Keanu Reeves has a cameo in it, playing himself, God. The only problem I had with Constantine was that the credits didn't give Keanu enough credit. Ha ha there I go again. But seriously folks, uber genius Keanu wrote, directed, produced, stared, cimenagraphed, costume designed, pet/demon trained, edited, and choreoraphed the entire film. I must say, that after John Travolta's Boy in the Plastic Bubble, another film about fighting Satan and stuff, this is the greatest film ever. You will feel honored to have seen this. Thank you Keanu, you truly touched me, and that was very nice of you. I appericate it. A lot. Seriously. You rock. Not kidding. Don't ever change. Stay cool. Have a good summer, let's hang out. Peace. Your B.F.F, Brandon Smith