Product: Beowulf (1999)
Rating: 2.0
Old Epic Poem Turned into a Cheap TV Game Action
'Beowulf' is the hero of an old epic poem, of which name you might remember in the English literature class, (Perhaps it will be better-known thanks to Gerard Butler, who is to play the title role in the 2005 film.) Whatever his version may be, my advice about this Christopher Lambert version is this: DON'T WATCH, if you don't want to waste your time.How can you translate this old poem into a film, absolutely modern media? The producers of the film thought it best to shift the setting of the story into the near future, probably post-apocalypse times, and the castle is no longer a traditional castle with a moat; it's more like a disused factory with a slight 'Mad Max' touch built in Romania.The idea is not bad. To this castle a tormented hero with a dark secret comes, and he is Christopher Lambert's Beowulf, perfectly equipped with gadgets like a crossbow with automatic-reloading system. He makes his way into the castle, beating the armies surrounding the premises, and proposes to kill the monster haunting it: it's called Grendel.Actually, so far, the film is not bad. But suddenly it loses its steam after this promising opening. The occasional fight with Grendel is not exciting enough, partly because poor editing and the unconvincing monster (or low-budget CGIs). Christopher Lambert's rather one-dimentional character does not help, nor the unmemorable king Hrothger (Oliver Cotton) and his daughter (Rhona Mitra). The dull story reminded me of 'The 13th Warrior.' But at least 'The 13th Warrior' had an advantage of being a Kurosawa copy; in 'Beowulf,' which is a poor copy of 'Mortal Kombat,' you cannot escape from the attack of loud techno-pop soundtrack.The only saving grace comes from the two ladies -- Rhona Mitra, the original live-action Lala Croft, and Patricia Velasquez, 'Anck Su Namun' of Brendan Fraser's 'The Mummy' series. Yes, they are both sexy, and if you can judge a film by its being sexy or not, you may like it.