Product: The Hitman [VHS] (1991)
Rating: 1.0
Box reads "3 1/2 Stars...Astonishing!" -Astonishingly awful
Too bad Braddock didn't stay missing in action, otherwise we might have been spared this boring and slow movie. Assumed to be one of his better flicks (only because of the box) I've seen more emotion on the "Total Gym" infomercial.Apparently his mullet isn't the only bad thing following this honorary Texas ranger around town. Taking time out his day killing people Norris teaches a bullied child how to stand up for himself. Too bad He didn't teach him how to withstand a brick of plastique explosive via Norris's foes. Sure he slaps a bigot around but isn't that sort cancelled out by his "you eat this sh**?" remark about Middle Eastern food. *Note to self* Help elderly woman across street, then head to nearest Italian restaurant, pour tomato sauce over patron's head and proceed to ask him if the same sauce flows through his veins?Keep that thumb flexed and ready 'cause you'll be hitting FF more than once. Norris walking from point A to point B is boring, especially when it lasts 10 minutes.Going to watch 'Hitman'? Keep the phone line free 'cause after hitting the 'time remaining' button for 11th time you'll wish you had placed a hit on yourself