Product: The Musketeer (2001)
Rating: 1.0
Completely Awful
This may not be the worst movie ever made but it's the worst I've seen in a long time. The tired premise will be instantly recognisable to anyone who's ever watched the Saturday Kung-Fu movie special: a child who witnesses his parents' deaths at the hand of an evil-doer gets trained in martial arts by his father's master and then sets out to avenge the bad, finding love and renown along the way. Setting this plot in 16th century France is not necessarily a bad idea, but promoting it as any kind of adaptation of Dumas' _The Three Musketeers_ is utter hogwash. Some of the character names are the same is all, and it does D'Artangnan and co. a great disservice to associate them with this ... .The performances are wooden, perhaps due to the utterly unmoving and meaningless script, which features numerous unnecessary lines intended to cover up that nothing is actually happening here. Justin Chambers, in particular, has no sense of timing, but rushes into every line as though he can't bear to have anyone else speaking. The action segments are overdone and most of them are filmed in such dark environments that you can't tell what's going on anyway. Attention to detail is non-existent, as in the case of the near-foundered horse who ten minutes and a journey halfway across France later is ready to charge into battle.I generally am soft on any movie that features swords and good costumes, but not even those elements can make this travesty worth viewing. Skip it!