Product: Tailor of Panama [VHS] (2001)
Rating: 2.0
Tailored with a misguided plot and repulsive characters.
Sassy as its cast may be, despite their often-ludicrous characters and the ridiculous situations they encounter, "The Tailor of Panama" isn't a very remarkable movie, nor does it leave a lasting impression once the final, ending surprise rolls around. The movie itself is tailored around the notion that a simple lie can lead to catastrophic results, and I could live with this lesson, if not for its baffling turn of events once things start getting out of hand.British MI-6 agent Andy Osnart (Pierce Brosnan), demoted from his usual dealings in London for bedding a higher-up's mistress, is assigned to Panama to keep tabs on the balance of power over the canal. Seeking out vital information, he befriends the local tailor, Harry Pendel (Geoffrey Rush), who is only to eager to contrive stories and fabrications about a plan to hand over the Panama Canal to one of three possible purchasers, unaware that while he thinks he's leading Andy on, he's really the one being played for a fool.With a plot as detailed as this, vital clues are important; unfortunately, the movie has little of them. Much of these so-called "clues" are merely Harry's wildly imaginative stories, which include subplots that involve one of his best friends and his own secretary. He even uses his own wife, who works for those in control of the canal, taking pictures of her confidential yet useless documents as a ploy to try and buy time from Andy, who keeps up the pretense of impatience while in Harry's company, but sees fit to kick back and relax, confident that his own plans will carry through.For the most part, the first two acts of the movie are fashioned somewhat impressively, beginning in a tedious manner and then elevating the interest as Harry gets himself in deeper. As the mysteries and subplots begin to unfold and reveal themselves, we get a grasp on the situation, only to have it all thrown out the window with a third act that is neither impressive nor eye-opening.As if this weren't enough, the characters themselves are completely repulsive. Brosnan plays his 007-ish Andy with great gusto, but his character is such a lewd, unnecessarily disgusting character that it's hard not to wince. Rush is reduced to little more than a whining, bumbling idiot as Harry the motor-mouthed tailor, while actresses Jamie Lee Curtis and Catherine McCormack are wasted as Harry's faithful, suspicious wife, and Andy's bed buddy, respectively."The Tailor of Panama" doesn't go down very easily, given the fact that it wants to be comical and serious simultaneously. This identity crisis between serio-comedy and action thriller prevents it from being little more than a messy, uneven attempt, with a population of characters who spend the entire movie acting like fools rather than spies and tailors.