Product: The Transformers - The Movie (1986)
Rating: 2.0
Guess I'm Not a Kid Anymore
Remember when we were kids and this was new and it was the coolest thing to hit the big screen and it was so awesome and you could just watch it over and over again for days? Me neither. I don't know whether I'm older and more sophisticated, or if CGI has jaded me on eight-cell animation, or if I was blinded by the awesomeness of the Transformers when I was a kid, but this is difficult to watch now.The animation, done at eight cells per second to cut costs, is herky-jerky and inconsistent. The problems with the visuals are amplified by the problems with the sound, which is flat and full of metallic screeches. The story proceeds hastily and with little explanation of its deviations from the TV series, as characters who have taken a massive pounding for years suddenly can't handle one sock in the gut.It's interesting how many stars contributed voice work to this movie. Casey Kasem, Eric Idle, and Judd Nelson must be proud of their contributions. Leonard Nimoy and Robert Stack, both semi-retired at this point, contribute significant characters, and this was the last work for both Scatman Crothers and Orson Welles, the latter of whom reputedly expressed shame to realize this would be his swan song.There may be a great deal of nostalgia value to this movie for people who, like me, grew up on the Transformers. But I can't bring myself to watch it more than once. The Transformers may have been a pocket full of awesome when I was a kid, but I'm not a kid anymore, and neither are you. Rest easy on your memories of happier times, don't try to relive them by watching this unwatchable pelf.