Product: Super Mario Bros. [VHS] (1993)
Rating: 1.0
I think I'm gonna cry....
The "Super Mario Bros." movie is a disgrace to everything related to Nintendo or moviemaking, and I highly recommend--in fact, I insist--that if you ever see it, just scream and run!If only I could stop right there! Somehow, I have this urge as a devoted ...customer to take some of my precious time to list as many reasons why this movie is so awful as I can think of in the present time. Well, here goes.If you're reading this review, you're probably familiar with the original game from 1985. Therefore, you should know that the Mushroom Kingdom is NOT a bustling city filled with cops that catch Mario and Luigi, and King Koopa is NOT a deevolved human with a lizard tongue, and the Goombas are NOT humans with shrunken heads, and Princess Toadstool's name is NOT Daisy, and a woman named Big Bertha does NOT appear in any Mario game whatsoever, and the Mario Bros. did NOT get to the Mushroom Kingdom by travelling to another dimension (they got there through a pipe, remember?), and King Koopa did NOT make a machine that deevolved humans. All these atrocities can be found in the movie. You'd think the makers of this movie would have played the game before!But wait, there's more! In addition to not being anything like the game (except by borrowing some names), this movie is just bad as a movie in general. The script is absolutely horrendous--for example, upon seeing that a building is covered with fungus, Mario says, "Oh look, this building has Athlete's Foot!" What a knee-slapper. And the acting is so bad that you can't tell the difference between when the actors are trying to be "scared" and when they're trying to be "excited"!Honestly, I can't find any reason to buy this movie, rent this movie, watch this movie, or even make eye contact with it for a single millisecond. Here I say it again: "The 'Super Mario Bros.' movie is a disgrace to everything related to Nintendo or moviemaking, and I highly recommend--in fact, I insist--that if you ever see it, just scream and run!"