Product: Under the Tuscan Sun (2003)
Rating: 2.0
Overpowering Enough for a Man, But Made for a Woman
As a man, I prefer movies with action, that usually means gratuitous violence. I can't help it; it's in the hormones. But every so often, I will allow a woman to drag me, in my own car, to a chick flick, which I will pay for, and regret the experience two gruelling hours later. I was not to be disappointed in being disappointed. Darkness couldn't come fast enough "Under the Tuscan Sun."Diane Lane gets the unpleasant surprise of her life about her husband at a cocktail party. Her friends decide she needs to get away and send her to Italy for a little R & R. She notices a villa for sale and the old lady homeowner who is ambivalent about selling it to a wealthy German couple. Suddenly a pigeon discharges its plop on Diane's head. With such a tender and wonderful sign from above, the old lady decides to sell her home to her (presumably right after she washes her hair).So starts her new adventure.She has the usual run-of-the-mill problems with the house, and one of the friends who sent her on the trip in the first place, shows up pregnant. She helps a local through her love affair with a Polish construction worker, and has an affair where she cheers herself: "I still got it." (With Diane Lane that's a real tough one to believe)! But after hearing that line, you might be asking yourself: "Did somebody actually get paid for writing this?"In the end, she finds her true love, a character who never develops because we see him inside the home through a window, and only at the end. (That way, Mr. Right doesn't even have to be listed in the credits).The only reason I have given this two stars is because the scenary was beautiful, and every women I have met since wants to go to Tuscany. (Oh, for joy)!The lady next to me asked me what I thought of it as the lights illuminated slowly in the little Great Neck theater. "Whoever directed this should be exiled!" I shot back like a Tuscan thunderstorm.Those around me smiled in agreement.Prego.Happy Birthday, Barbara.