Product: Gladiator [VHS] (2000)
Rating: 1.0
millions spent on fx, hundreds spent on story development
One reviewer described _Gladiator_ as 'one of the best movies ever,' and adds that 'if you liked _Braveheart_, you'll love this movie!' That ought to tell you everything you need to know. I will never cease to be amazed at the amount of praise that was heaped on this movie. The story dragged on and on; historical verity was pure Hollywood, so far as I could tell; and nothing seemed so important as pretty scenery and luminous cinematographic effects. Finally, the dialogue was nothing short of embarrassing--towards the end, my friend and I gave up all efforts to conceal our laughter. Neither Crowe's bedrock solidity nor Joaquin Phoenix' Fiennes-like homoerotic flamboyance could save this film (check out the latter's 'busy little bee' tirade). If you *must* see this film, get extremely high first--your critical faculties will require dulling in order to get through it.