Product: The Descent (Original Unrated Cut) [Blu-ray] (2006)
Rating: 1.0
Indecent
The peaceful life of a reclusive clan of cannibalistic subterranean cave dwellers is shattered forever when their home is invaded by a troop of foul-mouthed women on a mission to convince cinema goers that rude, aggressive, egotistical, profanity spouting twits are the new cool.Horror cliche after horror cliche is evoked as the women, several of whom appear to be high on a toxic cocktail of steroids, PCP and testosterone supplements, make several elementary caving mistakes (my favourite was the one deciding to go running through a dark tunnel she's never explored at full speed) then go all Lord of the Flies on the cave's inhabitants and each other, with ample servings of pointless gore.The movie has no atmosphere whatsoever to work off, so relies on jolting the audience from time to time. The only genuinely scary moment that actually made effective use of the claustrophobic cave environment is the one where one of the women gets herself wedged in a narrow tunnel (nevermind that the tunnel collapsing on top of her inexplicably helps her free herself).To add to the fun, the opening 10 minutes or so of the movie has little to do with what happens next, before being arbitrarily evoked towards the end to justify some more gratuitous violence.In the final scenes of the Descent the protagonist detaches herself from any sort of credible plot or character motivation, and a laughable twist is inserted into the final moments of the film with all the aplomb and originality of a derivative grade 2 creative writing exercise.The production values are good, and this comes from Britain, which may be why it got far more attention than it deserves. A nightmare, but for all the wrong reasons.