Product: The Descent (Original Unrated Cut) [Blu-ray] (2006)
Rating: 2.0
Descent is decent, but descends into despair
I'm gonna be the Simon Cowell judge of this film.A FIRST.First film with only girls (except for an early husband scene)! Opposite "The Thing." Promising so far.Skipping to the beginning, about 30 minutes in: (some time after what may be any film's most coincidential yet most stereotypical car accident):SHOCKSIn the cave, at least twice you could see the "shock" coming. This makes me think the writer is lazy. Example: A girl and you thinks something is there; it's a false call. Then you can see from 10 miles away when the shock is, unless you are 12 years old and never seen a horror film. I suspect this technique - the red shark - began in jaws. That's how long it's been reused. Then it worked. Everybody now knows it doesn't work anymore, yet they all keep doing it..To have a surprise, you need a new configuration (there are many via conscious thought, none are used in any film).SCARESI was genuinely scared twice - no thrice - in the movie.1): Once near the beginning when the first scary thing happened underground. That was genuinely unnerving, and, most importabntly, we could all relate so well to that because it could be real.2) The first appearance of you don't know what.3) And near the end, after the critter bits ... oh I can't say it, for giving it away. Except that was tremendous, the way she expressed herself.So, after the film was nearly over, it surprised me. There were other times I was nearly scared, or partly. This just confirms to me cliches and stupid rules were fell back upon too much in the main film.EDITING:The rest was a monster mish mash confounded more by the ever-increasingly infuriating idiotic editors today who seem to think it's better in the action scenes if you cannot figure out what the hell is going on to who faster than ever before. Older movies used to have a similar style to disguise the inept monster - quick cuts or moving the camera jerkily. But what a worse cut up mess they make today, when they could make the most flowing continuous actions scenes ever.In this film, the editor was one of the erratic monsters.When will they learn to hold back, and NOT move the camera, or cut, when the scene movement does it all?SOUND:Uh-oh, the aliens have that same, too familiar, clickety clack sound. Christ, thats a bad Siqns.Why in Mell's name?THE DEMONS OF DARKNESSI can't believe there wasn't a point where all was pitch black, or at least for one character (even better) to enable losing their headlight realistic. Imagine that, for a few minutes, preferably half an hour, stretching it and offering something never done before. A totally dark cinema. Hell, that's almost liker Sensurround in Earthquake! An event.One other promising part was the guide telling the ladies, on the way to the cave, that underground you can have delusions, disorientation, and a host of other demons. Neil barely exploited this, yet surely was the core for most intense situations and horror. Each one could have been explored and exploited for maximum variety. But instead all we are left with is what I feel is an above-par by-the-numbers "ghost cave." Toward the end, too often the fright relied on by the monsters appearing, and chomping down on people, and again, and again.The DELUSION aspect could have really been milked, so that for a long time none of them know if they are seeing things - and neither the audience - and that leads to some girls fearing they may be going crazy. But delusion is barely skipped upon.The psychological aspects are where terror is.DISORIENTATION in the dark could have been another new area of horror to explore.Panic-inducing CLAUSTROPHOPIA.was missed too.CHARACTER:Dog Soldiers, Neil Marshall's first film, was on TV for the first time, 2 days after I finally hired The Descent. It confirmed to me - besides the reality of coincidence, yet again - my memory was correct, of the muck-about-humour and surprise witty banter in generous serves, and is how people act in real life. It was the film's best point and made it stand out above all others. The Descent was below this, mostly. Some characters gradually moved toward movie stereotypes (uo-oh, not that dreaded word again), instead of real people that keeps it believable.Has anyone noticed most films mistakenly leave out life-like humour? Or fun?DOG SOLDIERS was all better. I have no complaints about it but mostly praise for its surprises. Except one death scene, in the truck, mimicked Aliens. Likedumb, in the Descent, near the end, a girl almost became Arnold Schwarzzennegger in Predator's climax.So that's one part Aliens, one part Predator. Ha ha. I'll be looking out for a classic Terminator bit in his next film. Ha.THE END:Neil Marshall has taken a descent, instead of ascent, from his first film. Though marginally. That's how the horror begins.Now, I will stop being Simon Cowell, and cower in my cave.