Product: xXx [VHS] (2002)
Rating: 1.0
"xXx" rates nothing but zzz...
"xXx" must rank among the most insultingly stupid scripts of the year, ineptly directed in terms of actor/character direction, and mindnumbingly dumbed down for its presumably intended audience. I almost walked out of "xXx" at least five times but it was just so unfathomably bad that I was glued to the screen out of pure shock.Aside from probably the least-... screen kiss ever, Vin Diesel does little to distinguish himself as an actor in this vehicle. His lines are delivered as though being read off cue cards. The plot is insipid, predictable and, surprisingly, even dated (aside from the notion of biological weapons -- no, wait, that's been done before and better, too).Not a single element in this movie aside from the inclusion of every imaginable "extreme" sport is anything that hasn't already been included in a Bond film. Ironically, the first scene in "xXx" is designed to let the audience know they are NOT watching a Bond movie. It's a tongue-in-cheek (if mean-spirited, like much of the rest of the film) nod at the Bond franchise that suggests this movie is going to go places Bond would never dare. Well, if going somewhere completely lacking in class and wit is where they intended, that is just about the only fresh ground covered. So intent were the producers on out-Bonding Bond that they ended up creating only a pale, inexplicably illogical, dull imitation. If all a viewer wants is to see some cool extreme sports stunts, renting a specialized video ought to be a much more fulfilling experience, especially since the stunts will be real and not riddled with editing gimmicks and digital enhancements.