Review: A good first effort
Rating: 4 out of 5
Date: 03 15, 2014
This is an enjoyable blend of police-procedural and urban fantasy, though it has "first novel" written all over it.  That's not a negative; the author has made a good, if imperfect, debut.  At just $1.99, it's a fine read for the price, and I hope to see more from this author in the future.The world-building is pretty good -- the premise of a world very much like ours, but where magic and magical beings are both real and commonplace, makes for an interesting setting with rich possibilities for future novels.  She develops the idea of the myriad magical races well, though I'd enjoy a broader sense of the society, and especially of humanity's place in it (there are some intriguing hints, and I'd like to know more.).The plotting is lively and interesting -- occasionally a little predictable, but not severely so at all.  I was engaged by the story, and kept turning pages well past the point when I needed to stop and get some work done!  I kept wanting to know what happened next.The premise of the main character -- a smart, independent, clanless witch, in a society where clanless witches are rare -- is engaging, and I think it has a lot of potential.  But like other readers, I think some of the characterization was not fully developed and sometimes fell flat.  As has been mentioned, her emotional life suffers from a case of telling, rather than showing, and her emotions don't ring always true.  Her reactions seem incomplete, especially (SPOILER) in the scenes where she addresses her feelings about meeting her father unexpectedly, for the first time.  That whole, huge, massively important moment in her life occupies but a handful of pages, and her reactions seems stilted and awkward.  Dialogue in those moments seems awkward and stiff, as well. There are other similar moments where her emotions seem flat, but that was the most noticeable.  (END SPOILER)Other characters have some of the same issues, though to a lesser degree.  Their inner lives are not shown as clearly as they might be -- and this is regrettable, because there are hints that those inner lives are much more richly imagined than is suggested by the writing.  I'd like to see the secondary characters fleshed out more, in general ... they aren't cardboard cut-outs, quite, but they're not a whole lot more than than for the most part.  Also, the POV jumps about a bit, and that can be jarring at times -- it's not a bad choice, necessarily, but it can easily jolt the reader out of the story unless done very smoothly, and at times in this volume it's not entirely successful.The other weakness to the novel is the copyediting; as self-published works go, it's not dreadful -- I've seen far worse! -- but it's got enough typos, skipped words, wrong words, etc, to be a little distracting.In my perfect fantasy world, this genuinely good first novel would draw the attention of a good reputable publishing house.  I think this author has some great stories to tell us, and I hope she gets paired with a strong editor who can help her tell them, to the very best of her ability!In any case, I will definitely look for the next book in the series.  As for this one -- for the price, it is very well worth a read, and I recommend it.