Review: Serious Editing Needed!
Rating: 2 out of 5
Date: 08 27, 2013
I debated between two and three stars for this. The plot is okay but there are too many issues to get three stars. First, the editing is terrible. There are missing punctuation marks and misspellings. ('She rolled her eye?') The worst is the changed spelling of a character's name from Carly to Marly. There are unexplained jumps in the action, like maybe paragraphs were removed and never replaced with any transition.Repetition is rampant. The reader is told at least three times in several pages that Heath is Maxine's assistant and that Patrick is a police detective.We also hear over and over how amazingly spry Grandma Ellie is--as if most 70-year olds cannot remain upright, that Maxine has a bright red smart car, that Maxine could lose her business, and so on. And Maxine is in tears so many times it is a wonder it doesn't all run into the chocolate.Other disconnects: Berniece is standing on her back porch when she is knocked down by a motorcycle? A comment about 'bridging' is mentioned a number of times as an important clue and then never explained. Tanya is a good friend whom Maxine is going to pull out of harm's way and then is not mentioned again until the middle of the book. The police detective character is totally flat; he shows up every twenty pages or so simply to warn Maxine off. This book needs an editor!