Review: Another passable story ruined by poor writing and lack of real talent
Rating: 2 out of 5
Date: 12 2, 2012
I can't believe how some are rating this so highly, and even comparing it to those masters - Asimov & Heinlein whose works I know well. I have no issue with reviewers who say they enjoyed a book - I actually enjoyed the story well enough to want to finish it.  I nearly didn't get there.  The writing is amateurish to say the least.  The author keeps using trite and hoary old sayings like they are new found literary devices e.g. "jack of all trades, master of none".  the same thing can be said in a number of creative ways yet this sort of "gem" abounds.  As others have noted, word choice is often plain awful.  Good advice to any budding author is to read a lot and learn to distinguish good writing from the hack stuff.  By a "lot" I mean several thousand books in a genre written over several decades of the genre's popularity.  Learn how English is put together well and creatively.  Sentence structure is often laborious, descriptions and background social/political commentary and explanation are often repeated, some three to four times.  Are we readers not capable of remembering or understanding the first time?  A strong adjective is often repeated in the same or the next sentence.  This is just lazy.  A little creativity is required.  The author uses hyphens to break sentences up by putting an explanatory sentence between hyphens in the middle of the first sentence. This device makes the story logic awkward and disrupts the flow. A lot of the issues would be fixed by good editing.  Finally, the author patently does not have the necessary philosophical or socio-political depth of thinking and understanding to write the chapter prefaces (presented as  from a banned book written by an exiled university professor) in a credible or convincing way.  They come across as bits and pieces of thinking from someone out of their depth or gleanings borrowed from elsewhere.  There is nothing original or compelling about them and they are certainly not a decent reprise of any good analysis of why empires fail and how military elites become the last bastions of decency, honour and incorruptibility - which is how they are positioned.  Finally, it is not an original story in essence.  Perhaps there are very few originals any more but this one adds little to the "corrupt empire falling apart with a beleaguered military elite doing good in remote places against overwhelming odds" genre. it could have got away with being a rollicking good yarn, a bit like some of the better pulp westerns,  if only the author was up to it.  Sadly not.