Review: I tried to like this, I really did.
Rating: 2 out of 5
Date: 01 15, 2014
I loathe getting and giving anything less than four star reviews, but had to in this case.What's right?1.  If you're wanting a Christian read, this is it.  The book has tons of references to God's love, even going so far as to name a family in the book, Love.  Lots of paraphrasing the Bible in it, mainly from the New Testament, of course.2.  The plot was very interesting.  I loved everything about the reasons for leaving New York, their plans, and the trials they/she endured.  Most of it was very real.What's wrong?1. Word echos and sentences that last forever.  Reading this out loud would have solved these problems.  It's difficult to read an entire paragraph as a single sentence, which is the way most of these are written.  Plus, a non article adjective word (a, an, the) would be repeated enough to sound comical when read aloud.2.  A big one that would have been fixed by a glance at a map of the Oregon Trail?  The Trail didn't start until Omaha, Nebraska or Independence, Missouri.  Even then, the character would have seen a lot of people on the trail to the Trail.  Especially so if she stuck to the main road.3.  Her husband massaging the bunny back to health I suppose was intended to show his love for all creatures, as God is said to have for his followers.  But, having done the research on traveling to Oregon in a wagon, the first thing I though was "Dinner!" when the rabbit was mentioned.  Not "Spa treatment!"  Sorry, but that did crack me up a little. :D4. This is just me and my personal opinion, but I'm never going to like a woman who needs a man to speak to God for her.  But, times were different back then, and even today in some faiths, men are the path women need to follow to enter Heaven, so it is realistic.5.  The timing seemed off in a lot of places.  She's complaining about the smell of death, then buries her husband.  I didn't get a sense of days or hours passing.  Plus, going from Nebraska or Missouri would have taken five to six months.  From NYC to Nebraska, not so much.  After that, I kind of spaced out on the timing because I felt it was not reliable.6.  Finally, the fatal flaw.  This book is told to us, not shown to us.  This entire text breaks the sacred "Show, don't tell" rule.  While there's a lot of telling in a first person POV, this book tells the reader as if this is a diary.  The use of passive verbs enhances this recital.The best part about ebooks is all these things can be fixed rather easily.  It's a worthwhile and entertaining story, it just needs a little more research and a lot of editing.