Review: yikes
Rating: 2 out of 5
Date: 04 11, 2014
I really wanted to like this, but it just didn't live up to expectations. The premise of the story had potential, but basic spelling and grammar mistakes - which were sadly abundant- were just too distracting. Multiple eye-rolls at the errors. Very poor vocabulary choices, as though the writer were trying to write beyond her skill-level (I am still trying to figure out how a waiter could "dematerialize" from a restaurant table at dinner...did he just turn into a vapor? And one line "smelled of roses and terror"... And terror smells like..what exactly? 2 small examples of many more glaring basic errors, misused and made-up words). Too much description of feelings, not enough illustration of them. Not a lot of sensory appeal. The third person alternating points-of-view didn't work, and the character motivations were thin at best. I did like the male protagonist's family, though...the story had a glimmer of life then, and the few moments when things were good between the two main characters. Kept rehashing the same issues repeatedly, even at the stories climax. Failed story tension. Overall, just not appealing. Darn it.