Review: Needs an editor.
Rating: 1 out of 5
Date: 12 8, 2012
Seriously, major punctuation errors throughout the story. Not putting ending quotes after the character stops talking. Not starting with quotation marks. I think a high school student could have edited this and done a better job. And the ending was irritating. With over seventy chapters, a two page "Yay he got saved so they could be together and they lived happily ever after" was annoying. Only redeeming quality was the price. Free.