Review: Needs work
Rating: 3 out of 5
Date: 07 7, 2012
There is a story to be told here, a good one, and I am glad to be reading it now. But the writing is really amateurish. A Boss Hawg-type sheriff from Gator Creek, a valley girl FBI agent, and her Dr. Manhattan-like omniscient psychic boyfriend dressed like Col. Sanders in the Scottish Moors. Terrible dialogue - skedaddle, bejeezus, tarnation, coupled with wildly inappropriate humor and implausible scenarios. Jackson calls Terri's boss for support, he acts unconcerned to goad him to join the investigation. Meanwhile she is in the middle of a firefight being strafed by machine guns, and taking 36 hours for someone to fly commercial to Scotland is considered a good solution by the FBI director?Later: "She couldn't help wondering if Jackson had survived the terrorist ambush. She really missed him. Emotionally. Passionately. She grinned... At some point since his arrival, she'd fallen in love with him. More pressure! Sometimes she just hated her job!" "Get a flashlight from the boot. Trunk to you Americans." Well, shoulda been `torch' to you Brits. Terri, in the hospital, half exsanguinated by vampires, hooked to IVs, alternatively flirting sexily, or sluggish and dense, or making wisecracks.Continuing reading. Worry your pretty little head. Up to his * in alligators. Ducks in a row. Spill the beans. Hell to Pay. Jumpin Jehosaphat. Bet my bottom dollar. Lock, stock, and barrel. Genetically-altered blood-sucking mutants. Technically vampires, but invisible to security cameras? Jackson leads an assault on a heavily surveilled fortress at night through briars in a white linen suit and wingtips. He swims across Loch Ness at night in said business suit and wingtips. It's like a mile wide at its narrowest? An immense underground research facility filled with scientists and no one in the village has any inkling?Must stop, I'm in a target-rich environment holding a belt-fed M60 machine gun in the middle of a human wave attack by one-legged sloths. With noise-cancelling earmuffs, I make safety a part of my life.Continuing reading. Fun to pick apart. Great story, make no mistake about that, but poor execution. As mentioned by another reviewer, killing vampires and continuing with BBQ. Not once, but twice. And a really bad epilogue featuring rampant betrayal of a friend and ally. This author has other works, but I won't be reading any of them for this reason alone. Writing a novel is beyond my talents, so I humbly submit this review and hope the author can laugh along. Ta Ta, time to skedaddle.