Review: Needs polishing
Rating: 4 out of 5
Date: 01 19, 2014
As a fellow author, I was asked to leave an honest review for this book.Sadly... I did not care for it very much. The author tends to ramble a bit and takes too long to get to the crux of things. The book is 296 pages and it could have been done in half that. Despite that, it was an easy read and I breezed through it without too much trouble.Having said that, there were a few stumbling points: There's a bit of odd diction and misuse of commas and quite a few lengthy paragraphs that could have been broken into three, four and even five seperate paragraphs. There's a great deal of telling and very little showing.It felt like reading the journal of someone almost obsessively meticulous in noticing tiny details. While it is a story about cops, undercover double agents and detectives, there was a great deal of detail that could have been shown instead of dictated to me. Admittedly, first person and present tense is very hard to write and the author only very rarely slipped up (sometimes seeming to be third person and sometimes switches from present tense to past tense) in this aspect, but there are ways of showing even in this style of writing.It does, however, offer a ripping good yarn. Even though it is set decades ago, nearly every character, down to the villains, are relatable. You can understand where they're coming from and sympathize with them. In this, attaching us to the characters, the author excels. It also offers a unique view on crime and justice from a father figure's point of view. The tale of two rival gangs, battling over old embitterments, some of which are downright horrific.It's a ripping good yarn and full of imagination, but it left a great deal to be desired as far as style goes. I did enjoy the storyline, however, and I give major kudos for writing in first person and present tense. I could never pull it off and would never attempt to do so.Ronald Kent has a bright future in the crime/action writing division if he can get a bit of the showing vs. telling handled better.Five stars for the storyline. Negative one star for the rambling execution and writing errors.