Review: Delightfully Puerile!
Rating: 4 out of 5
Date: 08 8, 2013
"Delightfully Twisted Tales: Close Encounters of the Worst Kind" by Nicky Drayden is a small collection of four short stories which are both "twisted tales" and "of the worst kind". The first tale, "Winning Streak", is actually rather humorous, as an alien shape shifter manages to hit the jackpot 11 times in a row at a casino! They beg, threaten, and bribe him to get him to leave, but with everybody in the casino now watching as he continues to win, there really isn't much they can do, other than let him continue winning."Memories and All That" is a strange little tale of a pair of robots who have finally managed to buy a house in an all-human neighborhood... a robot's dream come true! However, as the duo unpacks, they begin to argue over various pieces of "junk" the other one decided to pack up and bring to the new house. While holding - and arguing over - an electric branding iron, an accident occurs which will probably put a damper on their welcome into the neighborhood."The Pudding Master and I" is another tale about aliens moving into the neighborhood. This time it is the Rynoss who move in, but for the past three years the President has been Anchovian, so nobody really gives a second thought to the Rynoss moving in. Except they keep singing songs from the 1980's - 200 years out of date. They wear pink leg warmers. They have great, sharp, intimidating horns. Perhaps worst of all, they wear platinum blond wigs. However, things really start to turn ugly when the Rynoss begin adding Butterscotch pudding mix into the hot springs.Finally, "Wrath of the Porcelain Gods" is every bit as gross and disgusting as it sounds. When 115 unique sapient species share a single space station, there are bound to be some cultural clashes. In this case, one very odd little curious amateur anthropologist has been studying the waste elimination processes of the many species. Normally his studies have consisted of him hiding in the bathroom until somebody - or something - comes in to "go". Except this final observation didn't turn out quite as innocently as he had hoped. Don't say I didn't warn you... it IS rather gross!"Close Encounters of the Worst Kind" is the first volume in Drayden's "Delightfully Twisted Tales" series. So far there are seven volumes in this series, with more promised. The tales may be twisted and they may be gross, but they aren't bad. They are more likely to elicit a groan than a gasp, and in that regard they are really fairly funny. They are SUPPOSED to be juvenile! Definitely not bedtime stories for the little ones, these short stories will entertain and amuse the same people who enjoy watching old "Three Stooges" shorts on television. So you KNOW they must be pretty good!