Review: Painful, breath-taking and beautiful....
Rating: 5 out of 5
Date: 09 27, 2013
It is not easy for me to write a review of "Right Now" because I feel so emotionally invested in this book and the series. I already loved and adored and cried over Ryan's story in "A Moment". "Right Now" definitely lived up to its predecessor. I feel strangely protective of both books and both characters. "Right Now" is the second book in the series. While "A Moment" concentrated on Ryan's tragic story of sexual abuse, "Right Now" is about Alex and the effects his fathers deeds had on him. The book is different, but it also has to be, as the characters are different and their experiences -though stemming from the same horrific deed- are different as well. Alex was no a direct victim of his father, but having witnessed what his father had done to Ryan and not having spoken up the way he feels he should have, he is consumed by guilt, shame and pure unadulterated hate. He can't deal with all the emotions that are threatening to eat him alive. While most of his life he was able to hold things together by having to be strong for Ryan and ensuring his safety, he now feels lost that Ryan has gained a sense of happiness and balance. At the same time that Ryan seems to be succeeding in the battle against his demons, Alex feels like he is more and more losing the fight. So in order to not deal with these emotions, he tries to drown them with women, booze and partying.That is until one night things change - he meets Zoe. Zoe is a tattoo artist and seems to be a free spirit with a devil-may-care atittude and that tattoos and piercings to back it up. She is strong, fierce and extremely loyal and head over heels for Alex. She sees him in a way no one else does. Not only the fun and charismatic jock, but the hurt soul behind this mask. She is patient and understanding with Alex, while trying to walk the thing line between being there for him and being his doormat. But being the kick-ass type of girl she is, she manages to find a way to get through to his heart without losing herself. While she is willing to go the extra mile to help him and be there for him, she is also vulnerable and scared and at times insecure. She is a real person. Not only did I love her loyal and caring nature, but the fact that she does not conform to society's or her family's rules, but lives by the rules she makes for herself. She is a character I can respect and look up to.Alex character was so heart-breaking. He was sweet and charismatic and funny, but at the same time a tortured soul. All I wanted was to take his pain away. Even through the mistakes he made and the sometimes stupid behaviour, I could not help but feel bad for him. He was in his own personal hell - a hell created by his own father.Speaking of the father, I hated him so much I was trembling at times, wanting to howl like a wounded animal. I wanted to beat him to a pulp and I could understand the feelings of rage he brought out in Alex. Not far behind on the hate scale were Ryan's parents. How anyone can do the things to a child, that Alex father did is beyond my understanding. It is so horrific, so disgusting that I wish it would be just a story in a book. But it happens everyday in real life as well. Therefore I adore the fact that Marie Hall doesn't shy away from really dark and disturbing topics. The kind of topics that make you want to curl up in a corner and bawl like a baby. The kind of things that are still a taboo to talk about and therefore the more important that they are mentioned in a book. Ms Hall does an amazing job portraying"survivor's guilt" and the effects child abuse and rape has not only on the victim, but on others that are being touched by this. The family of the monster, his wife and his children. The family of the victim as it effects them as well. But don't get me wrong here - Ryan's parents should burn in hell for not being there for him. She shows how the guilt of not having done more for the victim can nearly destroy a person. She shows all the consequences a crime like this has in painful clarity.Yet, she still manages to make you laugh in between or to consider moving to the North Pole with all the sexual tension going on between Alex and Zoe. She manages to make you swoon and the story makes your heart melt. And she manages to make you think.Throughout the book, you have many sweet, sizzling or funny moments, but the tragedy that happened to Ryan and in a different way to Alex overshadows the good things. The darkness doesn't just disappear with the snap of a finger and I liked that about this story. It wasn't the typical I found love and now I am happy and forgetting my dark past" type of thing. This book brought so many emotions to the surface - I was sobbing, I was angry, I was happy, I was hopeless, I was a bit of everything.What I loved about this book that although it has a happy ending, it wasn't all sunshine and things weren't just forgiven. There are things that are so awful there is no forgiveness and this book has emphasized that. There is no forgiving or forgetting when a child's soul is broken - all that the ones affected can do is trying to live their life - right now.Five + super-emotional, tear-filled, rage-filled, happy in the end stars.You don't have to read "A Moment" in order to read "Right Now" but I would highly recommend it as it makes the story complete.