Review: "You make my heart race, my voice sing and my loins burn"
Rating: 2 out of 5
Date: 01 29, 2012
I don't know, but I think he may need to see a doctor for that.This is an erotic short story. And it is short, but for me, it was hardly erotic. Most of the story is completey cheesy with lines like loins burning, and with all the sailing metaphors. I think mention of his 'dinghy' was supposed to be cute and funny, but it's not my idea of sexual repartee.All the action up until the sex scene is slow, bogged down in really asinine dialogue and pointless (non)action. Do I care what they eat for brunch? And there is needless mention of the brand names the couple is wearing, and this sort of attention to detail wasn't exactly what I was looking for.Then when the reader does get to the sex scene (at location 351 and this story has 478 locations), that scene is as if a switch were flipped. We go from mundane to almost full-on porn action, with some very dirty talk and with the woman actually tonguing her own nipples. I don't mind explicit sex at all, but this scene just felt jarring coming along after such a slow and boring build-up.Countless cheesy one-liners, only a slightly half-way decent sex scene, and a pretty trite romance/story all the way around make this a tedious and boring erotic read.