Review: Animals Humping In The Wild
Rating: 3 out of 5
Date: 02 5, 2014
I think it’s a damn shame more men don’t get accosted on trains. Ladies, you’re missing out on one hell of an opportunity. And fellas…what the hell? We need to rectify this situation immediately. If you’re a woman, you should strut like it’s your birthday…every single day. Having confidence is the key, and that confidence just might lead to more men being shoved into bathrooms and waylaid in sleeper cars. There’s a reason God created man first: If God had started with Eve, he would have clapped his hands together and said, “I think we’re done here.” Fellas, we wouldn’t even be a blip on the intergalactic radar. And it’s all because women have bodies that just don’t quit. Even God knows this.If I didn’t know any better, I’d say THE INITIATION OF MS. HOLLY was written by a teenage boy. A teenage boy who wrote frantically, pounding away at the keys like some untamed beast, and grasping for every orgy and orifice he could think of. This was basically one long porn fantasy with dominance and subservience included for good measure. All the women were perfect with tits the size of watermelons, or smaller, perkier breasts with perfect precision and icicle nipples and tanned skin and luscious lips. Not that I can rightfully complain, mind you, but I felt like with every page I was about to get arrested, tossed in a government prison, and held hostage by some woman in a leather cat suit.I like sex. But I was equal parts turned on and disgusted with this read. It was the equivalent of walking onto a porn set, and watching everyone from the actors to the producers to the lighting and sound guys humping away like there was no tomorrow. I mean, it might have been nice to have the sex actually come to a screeching halt and maybe even see a bit of character development. This doesn’t need to be literary fiction, but even an entire high school football team shoved into a brothel would take a few deep breaths or maybe stop to eat on occasion.Instead of resembling actual people, the characters felt like pawns on a chessboard shoved into position for the next sex scene. In short, the characters reminded me more of animals humping in the wild than actual human beings.If that’s your shtick, then by all means have at it, but I had hoped for just a wee bit more.I received this book for free through NetGalley.Robert DownsAuthor of Falling Immortality: Casey Holden, Private Investigator