Review: It has potential but.....
Rating: 1 out of 5
Date: 02 15, 2014
Besides the shortness of the story, it is written with so many grammar mistakes, it seems an elementary kid attempted to write it.  The author could have developed the characters in a more detailed way.  To me , it sounds more like a bad summary.  I am glad it was short, so I did not waste much of my time.  To the author, please take your time, have someone edit your story ot take an English Grammar course, it helps when you want to be a writter....