Review: Very short story. Interesting premise and characters. Needs additional editing.
Rating: 3 out of 5
Date: 08 19, 2013
Be forewarned that this is a very short story. I think it might make a good book if expanded, and professionally edited.location 138: "ALREADY" is a word, but in this case should be all ready.location 158: "DO to the blow" instead of due to.location 426: "could TO." instead of too.location 529: "ALRIGHT" (should be all right)location 584: "THERE here," instead of they're here.location 623: "what LIED ahead". instead of lay.location 641: Would that (left out "be") ALRIGHT (should be all right) with you?I liked the friendship between John and Jeffrey Jim. I loved the HEA ending.