Review: I liked it, but don't know if I can recommend it
Rating: 3 out of 5
Date: 09 30, 2011
There is a lot of potential in this book and if you're the type of reader who enjoys looking for things to enjoy in a rougher book, this may be worth the download for you (especially while it is free).  I do, however, recommend it with strong reservations because of all the issues with the book.First of all, the book has an editor credited, but he appears to be related to the author in some way.  This is a book that strongly needs the attention of a serious editor.  The entire book is written in a bizarre, non-standard style.  There are dozens of exclamation points (outside of the dialogue, in the body of the book) that give it the tone of having been written by an excited teenager.  Any sort of transition or pause is marked by "........" which gets very distracting.  In a similarly amateurish way, timelines seem to be a little off.  I couldn't get a feel for how long John Lyon had been living in Kansas City - at some points it seemed like it had been a week or two, but his students were also asking about making up tests (which would be weird for the first week of classes) and he had a well-established friendship with somebody who we're also told he had known for just a month or so.The world created by the author is interesting, but it often has a "Dungeons and Dragons for Dummies" type feel.  It's a very surface-level world and you've got characters spouting off about being the "Etherial" or the "Crystal-Mage."  Since you're just dropped in, it can feel overwhelming, especially in the beginning.  And the whole "It's magic" thing is pretty much used for anything that might not make sense.Characters are rather one-dimensional.  King Yarro reminded me of an eco-villain from the old "Captain Planet" television show - not in that he wanted to trash the world, but that his motivations were evil in a silly way.  His interior monologue is just a constant stream of cartoonish evil - he doesn't care about anything but his own pleasure.  Even evil people usually think they're doing something right, it's just their take on the world is twisted towards their own motivations.  It doesn't make sense that this guy would hate his country and his son just because he's a bad guy.