Review: More of a Drone than a Queen.
Rating: 2 out of 5
Date: 10 27, 2013
I want to read something before bedtime, so I download a fairy tale romance to my Kindle.  The reviews are good, and the book is free.  It seems like a good deal.Almost immediately, I am disappointed.  It is written in first person POV, which I am not fond of.  It is also written is present tense, which annoys me.  The rave reviews were clearly written by the author's family and friends.The writing is clumsy and stilted.  The tone alternates between High Fantasy and Valley Girl.  At times I wonder if this mess was written by an adult.  Could this be the desperate scribblings of some adolescent hoping to imitate the success of E. L. James by combining "Fifty Shades" with "Once Upon a Time"?Some passages are overly ornate, amateurish, almost boringly descriptive.  Then, without warning, there is little detail at all.  The love scenes are the worst, a mixture of blunt narrative and florid simile that cuts off abruptly when the heroine nears completion.  Where is the romance?The plot meanders meaninglessly.  The author has started the book with a dream, leaving me feeling cheated.  Or was it a dream?  The writing is so muddled, I can't figure it out.I prepare to write spoilers.  I must warn anyone who happens to read this.  Those are the rules.Now there is a rape scene.  Rape is not erotic.  At least the heroine isn't being raped, she is simply a voyeur.  Still, this part of the book disgusts me.  I almost abandon the book, but since I need to go to sleep, I keep reading.  This book is certainly boring enough to act as a soporific.I finish the book, feeling let down and disappointed.  Turning the last page, I encounter the final horror.This book is the first in a series.I fall to my knees in despair.  There is no prince charming to rescue me.  Indeed, the hero was flat like white notebook paper.  There is no one to defend future readers except myself.  Bravely, I vow to deter others from committing the same mistake I have made.  Perhaps if no one else downloads this book, this evil author will cease writing.It is a faint hope.But it is all I have.