Review: Maybe it's me
Rating: 3 out of 5
Date: 04 21, 2014
Okay I admit I have not finished this book yet, so hopefully, it will get better.  I keep asking myself (Given all of the great reviews) "am I reading what everyone else did?"  So I re-read them, and clearly it is the same book - Lillian is a 1/2 angel, 1/2 human girl who is called upon to join the Ivory Guard and protect humanity from evil demons (no spoiler there, this was part of the description).  The story idea holds promise.  What I'm having trouble with is the writing.  Now I understand not every reader enjoys ever author so maybe that's my problem. But here are a few examples of my issues, and I'll try really hard to keep out any spoilers because I absolutely hate those!1. Ms Herzer uses the word "Glorioles".  I've never ever heard this word before so I looked it up - it means Halo. I asked my son who used to teach Bible School, and he's never heard it either. So we searched the online Bible and nope, no trace of it; clearly not a commonly used word when referring to Halos. Why wouldn't she select a well recognized and widely understood word in place of one so obscure?  I don't think authors appreciate how words like these hurt their story.  They toss readers right out of the fantasy. I have no problem increasing my vocabulary, but not at the expense of the story.  It makes the author look like they're trying to prove they are pansophic. (see what I mean!)2.  Every other paragraph in the first chapter states one way or another, "... She was a girl who liked to spend her days buried in books..." ".. she grabbed her backpack that was filled with as many books as she managed to stuff into..." "Lillian might have her nose in books most of the time, however..."  "...I'm a full-blown bookworm..."  OKAY I get it!  I think this girl likes to read.3.  I found it hard to accept that in less than 3 pages Lillian goes from having absolutely NO idea Angels existed, let alone that she was part of one, to accepting that she must leave her family and all that's familiar to become a protector for humankind.  Keep in mind she had no idea Angels were real (or she admits, even GOD) and she never once asked any questions?  I would have asked many:  If Angels are real does that mean GOD is too?  Do I get to meet him/her?  What about Satan? Why do humans need to be protected from Demons? What do they want?  Where exactly am I going, Heaven?  What if I don't like it, or am bad at this, can I come home?  If these Demons are such a threat, why haven't I seen any in all of my 18 years?  And those are just the few that come to mind off the top of my head.  I certainly would have been skeptical and said "lemme think about this!"  Oh, and SPOILER ALERT MAYBE  I know I would have asked the big question "Who is my dad and can I meet him?"  I mean after all, he's an angel, I think I'd be curious to see what he was like!  Now for those of you who say she'll ask or discover these things later, not good enough. No one would walk away from the messenger, and certainly would not accept the assignment without first asking a few of these questions, or others like them.4.  Now this is the issue that has me in a quandry as to whether or not I'll be able to finish this book. All of the other things I could probably ignore but this, not so much.  Ms. Herzer's poor grammar and sentence structure. It's simply awful!  Example #1:  "Now she had not much of an idea how her life would look like... " That one hurt my head.  #2: "At first the conversation was slow and awkward, both of them feeling unsure and uncomfortable around the person they thought they knew so well, but it quickly vanished when it became clear that this issue was just too important to be watchful of hurt toes..."  WHAT? Where did Toes come from, and wow that was a lot of words in one rambling sentence!  There are many other examples, but I'm trying to avoid spoilers.  This should be safe, especially out of context but it is very annoying:  "While hell was a shoot-first-and-ask-questions-later kind of organization, heaven was running in circles in their bureaucratic machinery."  Seriously I'm as confused as you are and I read the entire page. That sentence just jumps out with no warning and it gets worse!  I feel like I've walked into someone else's conversation and they assume I know more than I do about it.I think Ms. Herzer is a very creative writer, but she gets ahead of herself with a thought and doesn't bulid towards it well.  She also tends to ramble and unfortunately doesn't seem to proof read.  I wish her the best. I really do hate to give bad reviews. But I hope these issues can be taken as constructive criticisms that will help make her a better writer.Sadly I'm only 8% through this book and I have serious doubts that I'll make it further.  I can't help but wonder if maybe it's me, but this book is not as good as the reviews have led me to believe.