Review: BORED TO TEARS- I ask you, WHAT heat???
Rating: 1 out of 5
Date: 03 23, 2011
***SPOILERS*** Recommendations included.HIGH LEVEL: Book 1 in a mind-numbingly uninspired paranormal romance about Polar bear shifters. Surprisingly bland and lackluster, despite the beautiful setting. Writing clear and accessible, but dialogue falls flat. I would have imagined that it would be nearly impossible to take a gorgeous Alaskan wilderness cabin fever story and ruin it, but that's what happened here. Only redeeming quality: it took barely two hours to read it, so I didn't waste much time.MAIN ISSUE: Complete lack of tension, conflict or plot. From the first moment Carson slips naked into the bed of a sleeping Ruby- before even introducing himself- to the very end, there was no conflict at all. The closest this story ever comes to conflict is the remarkably nave Ruby hesitating over living out in the middle of nowhere. In the end there is a pathetic attempt at compromise over this issue where Carson agrees to go to Chicago, but then the book ends thereby eliminating any idea that this would have caused conflict and you are left to assume that he does, they have a good time, but ultimately decide to go back to Alaska where they belong and live happily ever after.There were a few places this story could have found a real plot:1. Ruby could have resisted. Instead she has NO TROUBLE AT ALL believing in shape shifters and very little trouble believing in mates. She doesn't even get upset about essentially being felt up by a stranger, being unnaturally attracted to a stranger, or being lied to by both her sister and her strange new lover. Would you be upset if your sister essentially lured you out into the wilderness to meet your destined mate without any warning?? I would have knee capped her.2. Perhaps Ruby herself was unique. There was a reference to the fact that it wasn't normal for the woman to dream of the man, though Ruby did. Instead of pursuing this potentially interesting twist, Carson literally said "Does it really matter?" To which Ruby responds "I guess not." Okay, so much for curiosity.3. The sister could have actually been missing. Carson and Ruby could have had to work together to save her and his brother...Nope. None of those things happened. There was no plot. No problems or conflicts to be resolved beyond a lack of pop tarts and Lucky Charms. Carson didn't have to court her or woo her or win her over even a little. Nobody had to be rescued. Nobody had to adapt or change. Ruby and Carson never even fought. There was no passion, no spark. They were just automatically attracted to each other enough that any objections were rendered moot. I ask you, what about that strikes you as romantic.Even the magic was muted and pathetic- nothing beyond shifting and only one character does it, even then he only does it once and there are a few minor body changes. They don't even change into real bears for goodness sakes!! Ruby never gets to see this change AND NEVER EVEN ASKS!!! Can you imagine??? Meeting mythical creatures that can change shape, falling in love with one and not even being curious about what the hell they look like, never mind Ruby's defining characteristic was supposed to be her curiosity.BOTTOM LINE: This was the most boring para-romance I've ever read. Ever.RECOMMENDATIONS: ANY of these would be better, but there are TONS to choose from the I don't even have the space to list...1. Vivian Arend'sWolf Signs: Granite Lake Wolves, Book 1fun, light were-romance series2. Vivian Arend'sTidal Wave: Forces of Nature, Book 1- with frolicking dolphins3. Kresley Cole's slightly more adventurous  and intricate magical romance series (never mind the ridiculous title):A Hunger Like No Other (Immortals After Dark, Book 1)4. Loribelle Hunt's sexually daring werewolf romanceOnce Bitten [Spellbound Moon 1]5. Sherrilyn Kenyon'sFantasy Lover- Dark Hunter series with shifters, vamps and Greek gods. The first book is not as good as the rest- it just gets better and better.6. Renee Michaels' more sexually adventurous werewolf romanceHer Chosen Wolf: The Were Chronicles, Book 17. Moira Rogers' basic werewolf romance series:Cry Sanctuary: Book 1 of Red Rock Pass series8. Moira Rogers' magically diverse romance seriesCrux: Southern Arcana, Book 19. Nalini Singh'sSlave to Sensation (Psy-Changelings, Book 1)- romance series which features weres and psychics, but also carries plotlines with some substance10. Sydney Somers' gargoyle spin on romance:Primal Hunger: Pendragon Gargoyles, Book 111. Christine Warren's somewhat inconsistent, but often awesome series Wolf at the Door (The Others, Book 1) - skip the one about werecats, it had a weak female lead