Review: Remarkable
Rating: 5 out of 5
Date: 09 30, 2013
Guilt can make you do things you might not normally ever do. For Ben, his guilt drives him to accept physical pain in order to not have to feel the pain in his heart. Ben's guilt is so huge that he doesn't believe he ever deserves to be happy, and definitely not loved. In his mind, Ben believes he is fully responsible for his little sister, Juliette's, murder. It was Ben's job to watch out for her and keep her safe and he failed.It's been four years and the pain is still just as bad. Ben's parents couldn't handle the hole Juliette's death left, so they sold their home and moved away. Ben couldn't go. He couldn't leave Juliette, even if it is just her grave. He answered an ad for a roommate and Jude is the best thing to ever happen to Ben. One drunken night they both succumbed to their attraction and Ben feels it changed their friendship, so he isn't going there again. Jude keeps him grounded and cares for him, even though Ben has never told Jude about any of his issues, fearing Jude would be too freaked out and leave. But, Jude has been in love with Ben for almost three years, too afraid to tell him for fear of losing Ben. When Jude inadvertently sees the marks that Kage, Ben's Dom, left on Ben's back, Ben feels it's only fair, finally, to share about Juliette's murder and Ben's love affair with BDSM. Kage and Ben have a friendship, of sorts, built on a symbiotic relationship of pain and sex. They are not lovers, they are simply Dom and sub.A bad traffic accident suddenly changes everything. With Ben injured and the doctors saying it could be three months or more before he is able to get back to his regular life, Kage ends their contract early, as Ben isn't in any shape to play. Unfortunately, for Ben, he desperately needs the release that a Dom gives him to help keep him sane and to keep the nightmares at bay. Jude doesn't understand any of this. All Jude sees is that Ben has men beat him and claims he needs it. So when Jude discovers that Ben is actively looking for a new Dom, he loses it, confronts Ben, and the sparks erupt. While a large part of Jude is disgusted by what he's done, there's another part of him that is strangely turned on by the responses he got from Ben. And now Jude is riddled with guilt. How can they move on from here?Jude agrees to try to give Ben what he needs as they slowly begin to work on a loving relationship, not just D/s. Jude is conflicted because it's not in his nature to hurt anyone, but Ben needs this, and there is a part of Jude that finds the idea of Ben submitting to him very erotic. "Blow after blow landed on Ben's ass until angry red lines began to form over his skin. Each line etched itself onto Jude's soul, and he bore their pain."I'm not going to reveal whether Ben and Jude got to where they needed to be. I'm only going to say that I loved this book, and I think J.P. Barnaby's writing, characters, and story were intense and agonizing. It opened my mind up to concepts I had not thought of before and it gave me a new appreciation for the people in the lifestyle. They are not abnormal or deviants, they are people, just like you or me, who express their desires in a BDSM lifestyle.The visual description of the fire flogging was incredibly beautiful, and, for the record, the cover for 'Painting Fire on the Air' is one of the best I've ever seen.NOTE: This book was provided by Dreamspinner Press for the purpose of a review on Rainbow Book Reviews