Review: Great premise, needed editing
Rating: 2 out of 5
Date: 08 14, 2013
Mind you, the spelling is fine, the formatting looks good, the commas are all nice and polished. Clearly an author with good ideas. What needed more editing was the story itself.The cover caught my eye--not the typical headless pecs--and the initial few pages dragged me right in like an alligator clomped around my ankle. I was ready to settle down and have fun. Other reviewers have discussed the plot, so I won't repeat it, but the setting--that dreadful parrot motel--and the grisly murder promised a great read alongside the best of Florida-set stories.Unfortunately, it falters pretty quickly. Main character Carson's speech patterns change randomly. Characters contradict themselves and forget details from earlier in their day. The worst problem is that the pieces of the mystery don't add up--and people make statements with great assurance and self-righteousness, such as: if so-and-so was on his way to the murder scene when the victim was there and still alive, that proves so-and-so can't be the murderer, so he'll start investigating the crime. How's that now? How am I going to take these investigators seriously? I'm as much a mystery reader as m/m reader so that sort of thing, and losing little details, kills the book for me. Sometimes I simply could not tell what the author was trying to describe and wished she had made another pass at it. After about the halfway point, I wasn't willing to read on even to get to the romance (sexytimes).Other readers may get enough just from the setting and relationship to enjoy it anyway. I want to like this more, but I think the editing process failed a potentially great read.