Review: Where, oh where was this book when I was raising my kids??
Rating: 5 out of 5
Date: 11 27, 2013
Occasionally I run across a book that makes me wish I'd found it years before. Such a book is Raising Super Kids. This book addresses techniques for helping or children to become the people we want them to be, but surprisingly, its focus is not on how to force children into a mold; it's more about how to discover who we are, and use those discoveries to guide our children into happy adolescence and adulthood. And now, having read this wonderful guide, I look back and think about raising my own kids, and the things I might have done differently.For instance, I can remember a particular incident when my oldest son, Michael, decided at eleven years old that he was more than man enough to look Dad square in the eye and refuse to do the chores he was assigned. Like my father before me, I chose not to accept that sort of behavior, and so Michael and I had a long talk out behind the woodshed (okay, it was a garage, but you get the point). As a result, Michael did his chores... but he didn't speak to me for about three days, eitherBy demonstrating various ways to deal with children's rebelliousness, frustration, fear, anger and anxieties, the book shows parents how to nurture the child's own ability to think through problems and find solutions. We all want our kids to grow up confident and capable, and this book shows clearly that the key to achieving this worthy goal is found during those years when we, the parents, are the ones setting the example. Should we show them that frustration leads to anger and bitterness, or help them to realize that emotional events are merely part of life, and require careful thought and handling? By keeping control over our own emotions and helping a child to validate and understand his own, we give that child the most powerful tool he can ever hope to acquire: self-confidence. And a self-confident child is one who will grow up to be respectful... and respected.How might this have affected my relationship with Michael? What if, rather than demonstrating for him the proper, time-honored technique for application of belt to backside, I had calmly replied that I understood his reluctance to do the chores, and merely let him understand that his refusal was hurting him more than me? What if I had given him the opportunity to discover for himself that respect and responsibility must go hand-in-hand?Michael is a man, now, and a good one, But I shall undoubtedly continue to wonder what a difference might have been made had I discovered this book many years sooner.