Review: Only 2 stars is grammar errors drive you nuts - 4 if they don't
Rating: 2 out of 5
Date: 03 28, 2014
I am a college prof and I read freshman writing all the time. I had to go into that mindset to read this book. The plot and action were fine. Dialog was very good. I really enjoyed that part. The heroine was 18 which to me was just unrealistic to have done all that she had done. If she had been 21, I would have been fine with it. The book did drop you into this world without a lot of world building – the aliens and their culture were JUST LIKE US, except they all are basketball player tall and have space drive. They even use the same curse words, but did have different words for panty and bra sets (eadai). Think Star Trekish. This is a second book of a closely linked series and you could get lost trying to deal with the back story, but I liked that.Problems - wrote in present tense. (Why???) But not consistently, so I keep coming out the story because of sentences like, "Cyndy sits next to the young woman that had collapsed on the couch.” (The couch collapsed? The woman?)  And FYI, no matter what Spell-check says, people are ‘who’ and ‘whom,’ not ‘that’.Lots and lots and lots of grammar errors. This read like someone put the work through Spell-check and just hit Change and didn’t read the sentence. “Good your here” and “You’ll family will need you tomorrow.”Most of the time the author did not believe in commas separating the main sentence from the person being addressed: “I’m sorry sir” “Where is she Barek?” and “Yes High Admiral.” Very disconcerting. But, sometimes she went from “It’s okay honey” to “Thank you, pixie” in thirty five words. Sheesh.Next, she loved to run sentences together using commas. “How can his father remain so calm, this is his brother they are talking about, his father’s son!” is one of the shorter examples. Then there were the incomplete sentences, “Jotham having left earlier on his own private shuttle.”Again, if it wasn’t for a fast moving plot, good dialog and the fact I love space opera romances, I won’t have touch this book after reading the sample. But I do and I did.