Review: Story had promise but delivery was awkward
Rating: 2 out of 5
Date: 12 29, 2012
When I read the description of the story I thought interesting concept.  However I couldn't get past chapter 3.  The story is written in block text that tries to detail everything going on.  You're three chapters in before there's even any dialog.I think this story could be good if the author would rework it.