Review: Good concept, in desperate need of proofreading
Rating: 3 out of 5
Date: 04 3, 2013
I haven't finished this book yet, though I think I've read enough to get down some initial impressions.  I'll start by saying the premise seems to be sound.  There are some nice original ideas, and some that is borrowed from other sci-fi. I'm finding the beginning of the book difficult to engage since it seems to start in the middle, and a lot of the background is relayed through briefing new characters.  Perhaps the disorientation will get better once the story progresses some, though I'm finding it hard to get there.  So far there's been lots of characters introduced, though no real development of them so it's like reading about a cast of cardboard cut-outs.  Another problem is that there's technical speak and acronyms that aren't always readily explained, some military, some science related. Having read plenty of military sci-fi in my lifetime I can get through it, though it would be a bit troubling for someone unaccustomed to the genre.The most important point I need to make is that this book really needs a good proofread.  I tend to be a bit forgiving with indie authors who let occasional errors slip through in their writing, though when it's hard to get through a page or two without encountering something, it really brings you out of the story.  The main issue I'm seeing constantly is capitalization of random words that have no business being capitalized.  "There was a carpet of Deep Hunter Green on the Floor."  Sentences like this are driving me crazy since there's no logic behind the capitalization.  Another really bad example, "Family is defined as Long-term partner, children, Grand Children, Parents, and Grand Parents." There are also plenty of sentence fragments and mixed tenses, though I'm finding those harder to notice since the random capitalization of words is so distracting.UPDATE:I've finished the book and decided to up the rating from 2 stars to 3.  Editing was marginally improved in the second half of the book, and content wise it shaped up into a story with characters you can relate with instead of the cookie-cutter military personnel.  The ending of the book doesn't really end anything though, not exactly a cliffhanger though it feels like the book just ends suddenly.  I do intend to see where the story goes in the next book, I feel that this is an author who deserves a chance to grow.  The spark of a good story is there, just needs a lot of refinement.