Review: Not as Crazy as It Sounds
Rating: 5 out of 5
Date: 12 15, 2012
"Beauty is truth, truth beauty." ---John Keats, from "Ode on a Grecian Urn"I remember having to read this poem many moons ago in middle school. (Notice that I stress 'having'---reading Keats was not a priority for a thirteen-year-old. Still, I gamely made it through English period for a couple of days.)Nearly three decades later, the significance of the aforementioned line is evident: even in our philistine world, there exists a shard or two of that which can be construed by our subjectivity as being beautiful.I am no Keats scholar, but I'd venture to say that, even in his day, while ravaged by tuberculosis, Keats was able to find solace and significance in the simplicity of a molded, decorated vase that spoke to humanity of that which we would proclaim pleasing to our collective eye.I mention tuberculosis because only in recent decades has science and medicine been able to effectively combat this dreaded diease, which invariably meant a death sentence for all who contracted it. Keats was only 25 years old when he died; perhaps it was because he knew he was dying, and that his life on earth was limited, that he sought out all that his seventeenth-century world offered. The guy thirsted for knowledge; had he the ability to redefine our definition of time, he might declare a day to be seventy, eighty, one hundred hours. Knowing that a second which has passed can never be recaptured can fuel finding beauty in what otherwise is mundane and ordinary; hence, urns and landscapes and people and plants that would not normally elicit impassioned responses might inspire someone to put paintbrush to canvas, or pallet knife to clay, or pen to paper---hence Keats's soliloquy to his favorite Greek pottery.Perhaps, if we took the same approach towards finding a lifetime partner, we might treasure our relationships more highly than we do now. In this fluid world, where relationships seem more grounded in the shallowest and softest of loam, it is imperative that we strive to build solid and sturdy relationships that can withstand the inevitable decay of ennui and neglect.This is where Stephen Williams's "How to Attract Women: Stand Out and Be Noticed" is applicable. Our intrepid author has proceeded to compose yet another tome that highlights the importance of seeking out a woman's beauty that goes deeper than her Nivea-enhanced skin.Williams urges his (male) readers to be themselves. While this is straightforward, simple advice, he also advocates them to utilize their emotions to find a way to connect with their potential partner: "Be considerate of (a woman's) needs and preferences but don't be submissive." (intro.)While it's always good to be assertive, it's also important to seek compromise. All give and no take doesn't make for a powerful dynamic---rather, it transforms someone into a masochist and a martyr."Women" applies the Golden Rule to the prospective relationship. The author stresses the importance of being a nice person and comporting oneself well in all social situations. In plain talk, don't be a jackass. You'd be surprised at the sheer number of men who do this when women are present.Recently, I was at a local watering hole where many attractive women were present. I made small talk with several of them and made it a point of inquiring about their professional lives, their interests, and what they valued in a relationship. Of course, this was my way of socializing; I didn't necessarily need a book to tell me that. But what I wanted to do was to make them feel important. It really wasn't about me; I was genuinely interested in who they were. (Having a couple drinks helps, too. Alcohol is a timeless social lubricant.)If it is ever possible to feel alone in the presence of others, that's what eventually happened with me. As much as I enjoyed the conversations with the ladies that evening, I didn't make any deep, emotional connection. I chalked this up to my personality, Despite being a loquacious sort, I am a solitary person by nature, and this has been a constant source of inner tension for me that I have never really reconciled. (Plus, I don't like drunkenness.)As the evening progressed, I found myself becoming more and more reticent, while the vast majority of men who were present became louder and more obnoxious. At that point, I figured it was time to make a surreptitious getaway and head home to bed.So did I consider my evening a rousing success? I sure did---I was pleasant to everyone present; I had nice conversation; I was relatively confident in approaching women despite the occasional awkward silence; and most importantly, I didn't act like a self-important jackass.Chalk one up for daily self-improvement.Where I come from, women have proven themselves time and again that they are capable of carrying a work load that not only rivals what men do, but surpasses them at times. Some jobs, such as law enforcement and medicine, require either a steely resolve, a learned mind, or a powerful physique that lets them perform the job requirements to maximum effectiveness.That's why my eyebrows shot up an inch or two when reading Williams's assertion that "women are weak" and that they seemingly go for "men who are emotionally strong" in order to provide a balanced relationship. This panders to the worst of gender stereotypes and undercuts the effectiveness of "Women."Aside from this egregious error, "Women" reads fairly quickly and provides sound advice for men who are seeking a prospective partner.