Review: Yawn
Rating: 2 out of 5
Date: 10 18, 2012
The only reason I generously gave this book 2 stars is because it starts out well. We are immediately dropped into what seems to be a murder investigation. One of the investigators, Lynne, is the new partner. She has no idea what she's supposed to do. It turns out that she's not there for her investigative ability, but because of a special skill she has.The book jumps back and forth from the present to two years ago which is sometimes confusing. Two years previous, a man named Gregory returns from the dead at his funeral. This isn't a case of someone being accidentally pronounced dead. Gregory was an organ donor and no longer has a heart. He doesn't know how or why he's alive again, but he learns how to turn it to his advantage by becoming a motivational speaker. And, oh yeah, he's immortal. He can't be killed. People begin keeping their loved ones' corpses unburied, hoping that their dead will also return to life. Ergo the investigators, Lynne and Jenko. They work for a company that's also trying to figure out how this happened so they can capitalize on it too. Lynne is involved because of her ability to see 'sparkle,' which isn't really explained but seems to be some sort of electrically generated life force.So far, so good. An interesting premise. But the story quickly devolves from a believable paranormal tale into an inconsistent collection of the bizarre. Toddler changelings can enslave adults with mind control, but can be captured and tied up. A woman develops the ability to kill by empathy and starts killing whole neighborhoods simply by liking a dog or a child. A cat is brought back from the dead by Lynne-it turns out that Lynne is a Healer, but can't actually resurrect people--and this cat now has special powers too. Somewhere in there, people become zombies. Gregory does end up dead, but I don't know how because by that time I was skimming as it got so silly and trite.The characters are one-dimensional and all sound the same. As pointed out by another reviewer, there are too many inconsistencies. For example, Lynne, Jenko, and Carol are walking to a parking lot to retrieve Jenko's car. Then Jenko is no longer in the picture. Lynne and Carol just drive off in Jenko's car.While I can overlook some typos and work-use errors, there are so many that it's not possible to ignore them. The book needed a good proofreader. But that was the least of its problems.I never did figure out what the title had to do with the story. Perhaps it was revealed near the end and I missed it. I shouldn't have bothered to try to finish this book. It was a waste of time.