DAMN YOU, NIGERIAN PRINCE!
I was minding my own business here on Amazon, Wu Li Mammoth Sales, when sure as sunrise I get a message from &#34;Amazon dot-com&#34; claiming that they needed my help getting rare mammoth parts out from their former palaces in Nigeria and Niger and I was the only person with all the experience necessary to pull it off.<br /><br />I was skeptical until they told me that we were talking about twenty million dollars of mammoth. Considering my total sales here are tree-fitty a week, I was sold. All Is have to do would be to send $100 to buy a &#34;gift card.&#34; 😉<br /><br />I'm not going to pretend I didn't know what that money was really for. This is baksheesh, the green grease that loosens the gears of bureaucrats and turns away the heads of bumbling cops.<br /><br />I was freaking shocked when instead I got an actual gift card for $105. My dreams of cornering the mammoth market.. getting out of this icy hellhole... ruined.<br /><br />DAMN YOU
Rating: 1 stars