EII domain
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Type domains
Alpha Quadra:
ILE
SEI
ESE
LII
Beta Quadra:
EIE
LSI
SLE
IEI
Gamma Quadra:
SEE
ILI
LIE
ESI
Delta Quadra:
LSE
EII
IEE
SLI
Contents
1
In Our Club
2
Overview of Model A
2.1
1. Base (Fi)
2.2
2. Creative (Ne)
2.3
3. Role (Ti)
2.4
4. Vulnerable (Se)
2.5
5. Suggestive (Te)
2.6
6. Mobilizing (Si)
2.7
7. Ignoring (Fe)
2.8
8. Demonstrative (Ni)
3
Being Led Around by (Fi)
4
Will the 'Real Me' please stand up?
5
Intertype Relations
6
Views on Other Types
In Our Club
The Humanists are a peaceful lot. Frequently we will go out of our way to help you. If you are a loved one, then the boundaries of this help are even more limitless. The happiness of others weighs heavily upon the shoulders of people of this type, a prime concern for cert. Introspective and prone to wild imaginings, they might not always seem like they're "all there" but odds are they are thinking of something interesting. Ask us! We might even let you in on the secret world of our inner life. Very generally good people all around, but let's not lose sight of the 'dark side' of the EII, those that follow the worst impulses of our type! Still, plumb the depths of our souls and, so long as it's gentle and sincere, you might just win a friend to last a lifetime!
Overview of Model A
1. Base (Fi)
Introverted ethics or “Fi” is responsible for understanding the quality, nature, and proper maintenance of personal relations; makes moral evaluations and aspires to humanism and kindness. Fi has a strong understanding of the social hierarchy and how people feel about each other, their attitudes of like or dislike, enthrallment or disgust, repulsion or attraction, enmity or friendship. Strong Fi implies the ability to feel what others feel and understand their motives and character traits. In EIIs, Fi is strong and valued.
Nothing is more important to an EII than forming and maintaining deep, personal relationships with people; our lives revolve around these relationships.
allows us to know quickly and accurately what other people feeling and size up the nature of relationships and the moral character of individuals. We are extremely sensitive to others' emotions, and do everything in our power to prevent and alleviate negative emotions where we can. EIIs are empathic (we feel what others feel) and strive to keep others in a state where they are at emotional ease. We know where our relationships stand and where they could go. Most importantly, we know where we would like our relationships to be.
causes us to aim for ideal interaction. If the future of a relationship looks promising, (which it often does in our eyes since we are inclined to see potential) we are willing to forgive almost anything as a mere slight, provided we care enough about the relationship. Often we blame ourselves for difficulties that arise in relationships even if the cause of the trouble has little to do with us. We always think, “I could have said this” or “If only I had known this, than this wouldn't have happened.” EIIs often hold themselves to unreachable standards when it comes to interaction.
EIIs are very, very sensitive people. Even if we are emotionally crushed, we probably won't tell the offender immediately because we don't want to create conflict. We will either address the issue later and smooth it over or, if we've really been offended, ignore the offender until they realize the pain they've caused us and apologize. I must mention, however, that bad relationships are never shunned. On the contrary, EIIs view them as something to work with, and if they can't be made positive, at the very least, they are something to learn from to improve future relationships.
However, there is a dark side to base
: EIIs define our sense of self-worth by the way others react to us. In short, if we're getting “bad vibes” from people (which is unlikely because we work very hard to ensure that you are loved, and so, love us) our self esteem plummets. This is why we respond to you with whatever would make you happy. Your happiness is literally our happiness. We often have trouble telling people we care about “no” because we take every opportunity to ensure that we can be their epitome of love and support.
Because EIIs are so perceptive of everyone's unique emotional states and responses, our mode of interaction is different with different people. This can trap us into thinking sometimes that we're being “fake,” when in reality we're merely adapting to the emotional needs of the people around us. Group situations (discussed more in the section on
) are vastly different than one-on-one situations, and every situation varies depending on who it is we're dealing with. A normally subdued EII can become quite animated in certain group situations which call for
. This can lead to others (and the EII him/herself) to think that the EII is being “fake.”
I have had some fun comparing
blocked with
and
blocked with
that one sees in ESIs. I find that an EII's expression of
is far broader, and I'll even say more inclusive than one can see it manifesting when blocked with
. Every EII I know is extremely interested in humanitarian goals and making the world a better place by fostering the right kinds of relationships, ones where the poor and hungry and sick are cared for and where people come before politics and dividing lines. ESIs seem much more concerned with their own microcosm. They care intensely about the people in their lives and work hard to make sure that they are practically cared for. The
of an EII is far more abstract. What's important to us is the intention and the underlying emotion. Our
is also less absolutist, but more on that in the section on
.
2. Creative (Ne)
Extroverted intuition or “Ne” is responsible for understanding the essence (permanent but not obvious traits) of a thing, estimating the potential and latent capabilities for people and things, and visualizing the likely outcome of events. It is responsible for the sense of interest or boredom and the assessment and realization of possibilities and opportunities. Ne will speculate as to why an event occurs, but sees the specific event as static and unalterable. Ne observes behavioral patterns and can assess a person's character. In EIIs, Ne is strong and valued.
Ideas! Potential! Curiosity! Talent! Possibilities! Hidden meaning! EIIs drink this stuff up. We love to talk about situations and topics similar to the one in question before moving on to what is “actually” being addressed. We want to provide an outline before we proceed to the specific details. Some of my Sensing-inclined friends get really annoyed with this. I often hear, “This is different though” or “That's not what I'm asking.” They can even get very frustrated with the fact that (according to them) we never seem to be able to really define concisely just what it is we're talking about and give a definite conclusion. But conclusions and practicality aren't important to
– it's the interesting and endless stream of ideas. Just give us some time and I promise we'll reach some end (even if you can't follow us there), and with understanding. It may seem like what we're talking about is completely unrelated, but there are all kinds of important hidden connections that give us a great understanding of the situation and how it will play out. Just because not everyone can see them, doesn't mean they're not there! ;)
EIIs love talking about ideal circumstances (especially in regard to our relationships) and what could be or what might happen instead of what is going on right in front of us. Unlike leading
types however, we only apply it to ideas that are personally important to us instead of pursuing the idea for its own sake. We also believe, unlike leading
types, that people should strive toward certain (mostly ethical) ideals. Yes, everyone is interesting and has something to offer, but more than just taking them “as they are,” EIIs think they should at least have an active desire for personal growth. Naturally, we believe we are able to help others reach their fullest potential – not because we think we are amazing and at some pinnacle of human development, but because we think everyone should want to be a better person and hence, make the world a better place. And why not, right? The problem about wanting to be perfect is that ideals are concepts of perfection that are, by their nature, difficult to actualize. Still, EIIs will work tirelessly and berate ourselves when we fail to achieve our ideals. We are extremely self-critical in every aspect of our lives that we think we should be adept in.
EIIs also enjoy “bridging social gaps,” as I like to call it. We want one group of friends to meet the other group. And we want them to meet our family too! We're very optimistic about the possibilities of the people we love loving one another. To contrast, an ESI would be more inclined to worry that his or her disparate groups would hate each other and that trying to bring them together would be disastrous. Our
allows us to see the bright potentials in the people we know, whom we pride ourselves in knowing intimately. We are not limited to observing interaction as it happens, like people with strong Sensing preferences, and worrying because we don't know if everyone will get along. EIIs also want people to be interested in what we're interested in. We throw things out there and see if others will “take the bait.” If they don't want it, we'll try other things. Eventually, we can become discouraged if there is no response. It's important to us that people be interested in what we're contributing, not in a “look at me” kind of way, but in a “I really want to stimulate this person” sort of way. We can generate all sorts of ideas, and have vast and vivid imaginations that we want to make you go “Wow!” If you aren't impressed with our world, we can feel hurt and worthless.
EIIs can follow through with projects as long as they bear our interest. In fact, we intend to eventually finish and perfect all of them that we deem worthy. When something new catches our interest and rises to the top of our priorities, we can abandon something and neglect it until it needs attention and our interest is renewed. Of course, if it's something we are expected to do, we are going to do it and with everything we've got... unless we really, really don't want to. As diligent as we try to be and usually are, it's easy to put off that one thing we've been dreading until the last minute, especially if we're not sure where to start.
The best part about
? As our creative function, it is the means with which we feel what you feel. We express and use our
with
. More often than not, we know why you feel what you feel and how to work you through it and make it better – help you reach your ideal emotional state. That's why we're called the Counselor or the Empath. :)
allows us to understand people at their core. People's intentions are more important than their actions to us, because we often have a direct view of those intentions, and so it's easy for us to draw more buckets out of our deep wells of compassion and sympathy.
goes further than just people, too. Music, poetry, and all kinds of art can illicit strong inner emotional responses from us. Often I will find myself moved to tears by witnessing something that reminds me of something deeply personal in my life. EIIs love metaphors and use them in everyday speech. We love symbolism, and see hidden meaning in everything – from our dreams to they way someone looks at us.
3. Role (Ti)
Introverted logic or “Ti” is responsible for understanding logic and structure, categorizations, ordering and priorities, logical analysis and distinctions, logical explanations. Ti interprets information according to how it fits into a validating system. Ti is particularly aware of logical consistency and how concepts relate to each other in meaning and structure, independently of particular purposes. Ti can also clarify one's position and evaluate mental capabilities. In EIIs, Ti is weak and subdued.
I think Ne flows so readily into
that we are not as cut off from our 3rd function as some other types are.
A good example of an EII using his/her
is when he/she is suddenly called upon to logically defend a personal view or decision.
, as best as I can define it, is all about how one fact logically makes sense given another fact. So we begin, trying in vain to support our view with logic. The problem, however, is that our views have been carefully honed and selected with
and determined to be ethically sound by
. I'll say it again: ethically sound. They “make sense” to us ethically. We may even be inclined to see them, at their roots, as universal and greater than ourselves.  They stem from our ideals; they are projections of who we are and who we want to be, and when someone says, “So... why do you believe that?” we are glad to share our unique worldview, but not when we are suddenly forced to back up what we think with anything other than “It's just the right thing to do” or some similar statement. Inevitably, the probing LSI in question points out a logical “hole” (which is completely irrelevant to us, because to us it's a question of ethics and potential, not logic and practicality) and we feel defenseless and under attack. An EII will then either revert to his or her ethical motivation (which the Logical type does not see as validating the claim) or drop the conversation in an effort to keep the peace, leaving the Logical type dissatisfied and wondering why the EII got so flustered. Not everything can be subjected to the confines of logic. Such a world, in an EII's eyes, would be devoid of life, color, and soul. When it comes down to it, people are far more important to us than systems of facts.
Comparing
and
, EIIs definitely prefer the latter. To us,
is direct, useful, applicable, practical – things we wish we could be.
can be fun to think about sometimes, but it seems incapable of producing anything remotely as interesting as things we gather with our
. EIIs aspire to be concise and logical, but have little interest in sitting around entertaining thoughts about how if x + y = z how z would be different if y was changed to f and what that shows us. We're much more interested in why one would want to change y to f and only if it affects our lives or ideas. EIIs value orderliness and structure highly, but never at the expense of people's feelings.
4. Vulnerable (Se)
Extroverted sensing or “Se” is responsible for the perception, control, defense, and acquisition of space, territory, power and control. It observes outward appearances, estimates and analyzes whether forces are in alignment or conflict, and uses strength of will and power-based methods to achieve purposes. Se understands territory (who has acquired what) and physical aggression. It is also the function of contact and apprehension of qualia, constant physical traits of objects. In EIIs, Se is weak and subdued.
will manifest in roughly two ways in an EII:
The first is our virtual obliviousness to our surroundings. Although we tend to be very organized people and feel like our thoughts are fairly organized too, they are quick to leap from one subject to another thanks to
, and we often feel overwhelmed by the sheer amount of information running through our minds. EIIs have a tendency to “space out.” We will leave personal belongings in places and fail to notice changes in our environment. We are frequently lost in our own thoughts and can tune out external reality, even in the middle of something like driving or a conversation. This has the potential of causing major problems. More than once I have had to ask someone, “I'm sorry, what were you saying?” only to have them become frustrated at having to repeat themselves and then assuming that I just don't care about what they have to say, which is usually a grossly incorrect assumption. Personally, I have to sort of shift my focus in order to take in stuff going on around me, but it's not long until something I see propels me into thought and I am lost again. I also have a hard time with directions, so getting physically lost is not a difficult feat either. I also don't feel a need to maintain eye contact with people  – I can listen and know what they're saying and its emotional context without measuring all their body language and facial expression. Of course, that varies from situation to situation. In any case, I would like to let everyone out there know that it's not because we don't value what you have to say and you shouldn't take it personally. I am being honest when I say that I always mean well – always. Sometimes, negative emotions (mostly anger, not sadness) given off by someone are so strong that I can't bear to look at them.
The second manifestation of our PoLR is a complete aversion to force, aggression, conflict, violence, competition, and the whole idea of bending people and situations to get what one wants. This is where you get the “overly sensitive” aspect of our personalities. If someone says something in a way that is remotely confrontational, we retreat. If someone really wants to argue, we fall silent. If people are fighting, we will either try to settle the disagreement, get up and leave, or both. We will not “intrude on others' space,” whether physically or psychologically. We are virtually incapable of making anyone do anything or refusing a request. No matter how badly we may want something, if you flatly refuse, we are likely to back down, at least after a short while. EIIs do not make things happen – we prefer to wait for them to happen or let someone else take the lead. In those rare occasions where we try to be forceful, we become extremely uncomfortable and vulnerable. It's terrifying. We want everyone to get along, to share their thoughts in an accepting and peaceful discourse. We want everyone to “win” and leave unscarred, and since that seldom happens in an
environment, we avoid such environments.
People with strong
are able to weigh out how much “force” is being applied and to what effect. EIIs simply cannot do this. We interpret most forms of criticism as personal assaults on our character which are meant to demonstrate a disapproval of some integral part of our self-concept. We sometimes have trouble differentiating between a sarcastic jab and an insult because we are inclined to think that even negative comments directed toward someone as a joke are still implying some kind of honest criticism underneath the supposed lightheartedness. In short, we can take lots of things personally unless given some kind of clear signal (spoken or otherwise) that we aren't actually being attacked.
5. Suggestive (Te)
Extroverted logic or “Te” is efficiency of an action, technical processes, the accomplishment of work, the efficient and prudent use of resources, factual accuracy (exact knowledge), and the acquisition of relevant and useful information. Te understands the difference between effective and ineffective behavior when performing a procedure or accomplishing a task, and aspires to increase the frequency of productive and profitable outcomes, optimizing them within a system. Te creates new, constructive applications of objects in concrete situations. Te aspires to absolute objectivity of information. In EIIs, Te is weak but valued.
EIIs are thoroughly impressed by people who can get things done - not out of a sense of personal power and cold ambition, but out of a  developed breadth of practical knowledge. We aspire to efficiency, but rarely achieve it as often as we would like. We have our methods for tasks, whether washing the dishes or balancing the checkbook, but we never stop and think, "Is this the absolute best way to get this done? The fastest way? The easiest way, yielding results that I can be proud of?" When we discover a better method for something, it is like a precious treasure. For people who value efficiency but are usually bumbling when it comes to practicality, such tips are vastly appreciated. EIIs are also ravenous seekers of knowledge (when it comes to our interests, mind you) and frequently have a penchant for reading and writing. We read and write not only for entertainment, mental stimulation, and creative expression, but often out of a desire to know (and share, if someone else displays interest) everything we can about whatever it is that catches our eye. In my experience at least, we also tend to worry quite a bit about our finances and are not very good at managing them. Money is an annoyance - something that is so vital to a comfortable lifestyle, but seems so elusive. EIIs admire those who know how to make a profit - who know the secrets of increasing one's income. We ourselves are much more concerned with doing what we are passionate about (usually with a humanitarian slant) than we are with making money. However, we wish for and work toward having both.
6. Mobilizing (Si)
Introverted sensing or “Si” is responsible for perception of physical sensations; questions of comfort, coziness, and pleasure (often related to food, sex, and cleanliness) and a sense of harmony and acclimation with one's environment (especially physical). Si understands how well a person or thing's behavior agrees with its nature as well as the differences between comfortable behaviors and positions and uncomfortable ones. Si displays a developed sense of personal aesthetics and comfort, ranging from cuisine to decorating to clothing. In EIIs, Si is weak but valued.
It's so easy for the EII to become engrossed in our interests that we push aside such “menial” things as: going to the bathroom, eating, sleeping, being on time to appointments, exercising, or sitting in such a way that blood flow is not cut off to the extremities. We never talk seriously about how physically attractive we are. We are more inclined to talk about how we find ourselves unattractive (and unable to measure up to our own physical ideal). This seems like modesty, but it's actually an earnest belief that we could be better... so much better. Criticism based on physical appearance is crushing to an EII (just like any other kind of criticism, haha!) EIIs love good food and good atmospheres, and frequently seek out such things. When the time for responsibility comes, however, it all falls to the wayside. We go into crazy-work-mode and overload ourselves with stress, even if the workload isn't as daunting as we're making it out to be. Of course, we are inclined toward perfection in all things, which, unsurprisingly, requires some effort on our part. We need to either finish the job before we can breathe, or have some Si type provide a wake-up call that we need to chill out, forget our idealism for just a second, and enjoy the moment. Sometimes though, we overdo it, exercising ourselves to the point of exhaustion to make up for missed time or eating thirty boxes of chocolate to relieve stress and indulge the senses after a hard day at work. Interestingly, we're not always model workers. We want to do things in the fastest and most convenient way while still being thorough enough. It's a strange paradox that often leads us to perfecting one aspect of something while completely neglecting the other and berating ourselves for it later. We tend to do things in the order of “this is easiest and most enjoyable” down to “this is difficult” or “this is not fun at all.” We have a great admiration and appreciation for people who effortlessly create comfortable atmospheres when such is called for.
Does anyone else happen to think that saying we secretly want to be healthy (refer to Sergei Gainin's article on Hidden Agendas on socionics.com) refers more to our mental and spiritual selves? As in, they are saying we might be not the whole picnic basket? However, physical health is good too, for me. I would say that I have a strong need to fully integrate mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health. Perhaps the desire to be healthy is a matter of all of those components coming together to form a perfect whole person. However, I would definitely say that matters of physical health concern me greatly. I am often learning everything I can about healthy living but failing to implement it. I really feel like I need someone to help me take care of myself, remind me to take care of myself, and to help me realize when physical problems are causing problems in other domains. I currently have someone in my life (SEI) who helps me connect my life problems with potential health issues, and I really appreciate it. I just get so frustrated when my health or my environment keep me from fulfilling my potential.
7. Ignoring (Fe)
Extroverted ethics or “Fe” is responsible for the perception of an emotional state in an individual and the bodily and linguistic expression of emotions. Fe is able to influence others' emotional condition and to communicate its own, "infecting" others. Fe is used especially in generating and recognizing excitement and enthusiasm. In EIIs, Fe is strong but subdued.
From the Fe page:
The EII "is perfectly able to integrate in a group emotional situations, such as people having fun and trading jokes, and sustain that for a long period of time. He is also usually adept at promoting such an atmosphere himself. However, he sees no point in doing so if his own inner emotional state does not prompt him towards that, especially if he does not feel as having positive private feelings towards the other people involved. He is aware of the need to keep a "polite façade" in certain social situations even in the presence of people he personally dislikes or during periods of negative inner emotions, but he refuses to actively attempt to integrate in, or promote, a positive external emotional atmosphere in such occasions. His disinclination for doing so increases along with his feelings of closeness with the individuals present."
From the EII page:
"EIIs can become expressive and very lively in groups for brief periods of time, but they always gravitate to deep, focused communication between two people or a small, close-knit group. They tend to shun wildness and prefer serious, more sensitive communication."
"EIIs are usually very straightforward about their feelings in front of others; what you see from them is what you get. Even at a party where everyone is supposed to be happy, they still find it hard to conceal their true feelings when they are in a bad mood. This can create distaste among the rest who feel that the EII is not cooperating by contributing to the positive and boisterous mood. This tends to lead others who don't know the EII well to have a misconception that he/she is a grouchy person by nature."
8. Demonstrative (Ni)
Introverted intuition or “Ni” is responsible for the estimation of the passage of time, the understanding of a course of processes in time, and forecasting. Ni understands how things may change and evolve over time and throughout history. Ni is acutely aware of events that are occurring outside of the immediate perception of the moment, and sees events as part of a continuous flow. Ni perceives the possible ramifications of future events and notices ties to the past. In EIIs, Ni is strong but subdued.
From the EII page:
"The EII is quite adept at following discussions on the developments of present trends into the future and at contributing to them on occasion if he feels so inclined, but he does not take that as seriously compared to investigating possibilities in the areas he is interested in at present. He usually dismisses supernatural claims as being silly, wishful thinking, unless they happen to be related to the very specific religion he feels inclined to believe in and which he may be inclined to make part of his leisure activities. The individual is also not naive to future happenings. He will often warn others of negative consequences. In this way, he uses his Ni to help the PoLR of his dual. However, unlike an EIE, he will not often take his own advice nor expect others to. His Se PoLR makes it impossible for him to demand that others heed his advice, and his Creative Ne makes him place more value in the possibility that he is wrong and that things will play out differently than in avoiding foreseeable disasters."
From the Functions page:
"An EII uses Ni mainly as a kind of game... They often intentionally go against its conventional usage simply to prove a point in favor of their Ne. However, Ni is used quite often in private, to produce information to support their Ne when focusing on making contact with the external world. An EII will often have just as sophisticated an understanding of Ni as they do of Fi. Unlike Fe, it plays a major part in their worldview, since as the vulnerable function of LSE it requires especially delicate attention. Thus, when an EII is given information regarding Ni by someone else, they will tend to take it as obvious information that is irrelevant to completely focus on. EIIs will often use the demonstrative function to defend and further support their beliefs made in the vulnerable function. Ni is the easiest function to use (after Fi) yet often occurs sporadically."
Being Led Around by (Fi)
Dear Co-inhabitant of Planet Earth,
You were asking about what it's like to be EII. Well, when you see the world through
-colored glasses, you are always aware of people around you, how they are feeling and responding to things and other people in the environment. Since the dominant function is "static", this probably means that it is the primary aspect by which we define the reality around us. So defining the world according to an individual's emotions and reactions means we are very aware that different people want to be treated differently; we instinctively know the stuff in the personality style charts (which we love to study).
This has all the wonderful, uplifting potential that the technical descriptions talk about, but there's a downside, too. We consequently define ourselves by the way others react to us. So
-dominant types are likely to have the lowest self-esteem in the socion. We will respond to you according to the rules of your reality: that makes you happy, keeps the environment peaceful & good, and keeps me safest. But we keep our inner lives secret.
It's like having a hobbit burrow or a Solarian homestead. Inside we have a labyrinth of tunnels, storerooms, portals to anywhere in the Universe we wish to explore -- we have access to it all (excepting, of course, anything to do with high
). We only invite you into carefully selected corridors and living quarters of our dwellings; almost nobody gets to see it all.
This inner world is the only place big enough for
to live and breathe. Inside this world we are always strong, successful, admired, sought out because the things we fill this world with are so amazingly and magnificently interesting. But somehow, when we let others in and are therefore forced to see it through their eyes it looks so colorless and...ordinary...somehow. Outright scorn is worse.
Thinking of how to start creating this page was making me very nervous (definitely raised the anxiety level!) until I realized it was because I was about to break this cardinal rule of EIIs. For example, look at what I'm creating here. Long-winded paragraphs about personal feelings. I think prose is our native language. Do you think I don't know that if I keep on in this vein we will have the most boring domain page on the website?!? This type of expression is worse than obscenities, profanities, & vulgarities to some types. (I won't name names!!) Truth is, I find myself hating it,too. It seems like...the most boring, unlikeable way to set up a domain page. I should do the world a favor & just can it! But what I'm seeing via Socionics for the first time is that it could well be because I let the reactions of certain people (experienced repeatedly & consistently) define for me as bad what is my instinctive mode of expression.
Well, more later. I'm going to go figure out how to do something besides prose (but no promises!) I think I'll go hang out on one of the Researcher Club's domain pages (anonymously, of course). Love ya!
Will the 'Real Me' please stand up?
I'm not sure what was supposed to go here, but I have some things to say about this question. I hate when I feel like I am not being myself but I also am not sure who I am when it's just me. I am crazy and imaginative and even somewhat ambitious when I'm alone. I get a lot done when I'm by myself. But when I am around other people I have such a strong need to adapt to what they need from me and to become the person they need me to be in order to help them reach their fullest potential. I hate playing mind games and there are times when I'll forego all of the niceties and just be upfront about how I feel. However, there are so many times when this ends up causing problems and conflict. Since it's hard for me to hide my values, I find it easier to just stay away from people if there is a values conflict happening. I love being around people who don't expect any gamesmanship. I hate manipulative charmers and since I am no good at charming people on purpose, I feel they take unfair advantage. I can always tell when people are lying and it disgusts me, but I am very aware of the fact that I so often alter or tone down parts of myself depending on the other person, and this feels like I am lying and being inauthentic.
Intertype Relations
Identity (EII)
They are very easy to get along with; we have an innate understanding of one another and a very special bond. It's hard to recognize them from afar, but once you start talking, you quickly realize that you are kindred spirits and can confide in one another. Very good for sympathy, moral support, understanding - not necessarily always the best for practical advice. After all, your Identity will almost always recommend that you do what you think is best to do anyway.
Duality (LSE)
They are very comfortable to be around, and very stimulating. They maintain a cold exterior, but are very generous, loving people who do not openly reveal their inner selves often. They are extremely loyal to those they care about. They are very ambitious, although often too hard on themselves when they fail to meet their high standards (we have that in common). They are magnetic in social situations and people often misinterpret their sharing of themselves as arrogance, as they like to talk about their experiences and are happy to offer advice on almost anything. They have good intentions, but many people cannot recognize this.
Activation / Activity (SLI)
Mirror (IEE)
We can go on for hours about people, life, relationships, and interesting ideas. Always great for conversation. They are usually very happy-go-lucky, but can lapse into sometimes explosive bad moods. It's when we really start to get into values that the differences appear. They sometimes write people off too easily and have trouble committing to anything after it has ceased to be interesting, even when it's a responsibility.
Kindred / Comparative (ESI)
Wonderful people. So similar and yet so different from us. They also live for the people they love, but draw a much sharper line between those they label as "good people" and "bad people."
Semi-duality / Partial duality (LIE)
Business / Look-a-Like / Cooperation (LII)
Mirage / Illusionary (ESE)
Whenever there is one around we seem drawn to each other. It is relatively easy for me to have conversations with them, and I feel sympathetic to them for some reason. I have a lot of good things to say about ESEs and they seem to admire me as well. Beyond having good conversations with ESEs (which can last for hours and cover a wide range of topics), when it comes to actually helping each other with problems I find a part of me just becomes somewhat impatient. I know I get frustrated with their emotionalism, and they get frustrated with my "self-centeredness" (focusing on my values). At best, we can be good "partners in crime", but at worst, I feel constrained by their judgments and demands and they feel hurt and annoyed by my resistance.
Super-ego (LSI)
They are very good at coming off as warm and genial, but one always gets the sense that they only do this because it is expected of them. They usually have a sense of wry humor.
Extinguishment / Contrary (EIE)
Very boisterous, and often very fun to be around. Their entire existence seems to revolve around a desire to be the life of the party wherever they go (and they usually are).
Quasi-identity (IEI)
Very friendly, but somehow hard to connect with on any real level. They are social chameleons, changing to become whomever their company asks them to be.
Conflict (SLE)
We seem drawn to each other at first. They are just fine in group situations, but things get rather uncomfortable one-on-one.
Asymmetric relations:
Benefit / Request
Benefactor (ILI)
Beneficiary (SEI)
Supervision
Supervisor (SEE)
They always seem to know everyone! Very friendly, but very absolute in their often hasty judgments of people who have "wronged" them. They want to foster warm relations, but they seem all too willing to force their occurrence in some people. Being around them can have a see-saw effect: one moment we're happily sharing ideas and then the next I am being patronized.
Supervisee (ILE)
Intriguing, often intelligent people. They can create some very interesting conversation and they like to show off their knowledge. It's quite nice that they're open to so many ideas and ways of thinking, yet they seem to value them all equally based merely upon how interesting they are instead of adhering to any kind of absolute truth. They enjoy being contrarians just for the sake of a good debate (which, in their opinion, they never lose). However, it's easy for them to be rude and bawdy.
Views on Other Types
I did not write any of the material above this, but I wanted to add a section.
Fi-dominants: We’re the coolest people in the world! A human soul is the most beautiful thing on earth. It is our highest duty to protect, cherish, celebrate, and aid every other soul. So, it’s only natural that we spend most of our time thinking about other people!
Ne-dominants: The second coolest people on earth! They agree it’s important to know why, why, WHY! They’re psychic the way they understand things. Give me a Ne-dominant to talk to any day!
Ti-dominants: They think we’re dumb and emotional. Their logic is creepily intimidating and hard to keep up with. If they ever became less intimidating, we could learn a lot from them.
Se-dominants: These are the cruelest people on earth! They don’t care about sensitivity and instead bowl over people to get what they want. They don’t care about perspective and get so obsessed over controlling tiny things. It’s too bad we have to live on the same earth as them.
Te-dominants: They’re super smart and are walking encyclopedias and success is their best friend. This is why we need them. They work so hard that they burn out and don’t know how to get close to people. This is why they need us.
Si-dominants: They’re peaceful and easygoing and good at looking after physical needs, which is why we need them. They want to be more aware of what could be, which is why they need us.
Fe-dominants: They’re fun and easy to get along with. They’re also scattered and have an attention span of five minutes so we feel like parents trying to use our Ti for them. They can also be totally fake. Stop putting on a play and be yourself!
Ni-dominants: We have opposite problems--they are disconnected from people, and we are much too connected. It seems like the only thing we can do is envy each other and yell at each other for being on the other end of the spectrum.
Alphas: Once they start talking, they never shut up. They run away from their problems instead of solving them. Trying to get deep with them also makes them run away.
Betas: They are annoyingly over-dramatic and whiny. Just like alphas, they run away from deep topics and problems.
Gammas: They can pretend to be nice but don’t be fooled! They have no mercy! They will destroy anyone in their way, and unlike Betas, they do this with hard work so they are actually successful at it!
Deltas: We get things done the right way! We’re concerned for YOUR well-being and WILL get to know what you need. We’ll whip you into shape and help you see all that is available to you!
Aggressor: They hurt us instead of caressing us! Baah! Hold us, Caregivers!
Victim: I’m an enneagram six so I relate to the “victim” in EVERY aspect of my life, not just romance.
Caregiver: Everything we hope and dream for! We love being comforted for a change!
Infantile: If annoying the heck out of people is “affection”, them I definitely have an “infantile” approach!
- User: Faquille
Type domains
Alpha Quadra:
ILE
SEI
ESE
LII
Beta Quadra:
EIE
LSI
SLE
IEI
Gamma Quadra:
SEE
ILI
LIE
ESI
Delta Quadra:
LSE
EII
IEE
SLI
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